T U E S D AY | 0 6 . 1 0 . 2 0 1 4 | E X P R E S S | 21
asking you to relocate to a yurt in Turkmenistan). Now if you’d, um, consider considering a move, then here are things to think about: You don’t love your job and you can’t possibly “know” a move would be permanent. Maybe you can negotiate a probational move with a plan to re-evaluate in two years.
The Coast Isn’t Clear My boyfriend is itching to move across the country because he thinks the West Coast suits him better. I don’t love my job, but I love my friends and the fact that my family is nearby in Philadelphia. And I know that if we move, it will basically be deciding to settle there. Marriage is not imminent, but we’ve been together for two years and we both want it to happen. Is it wrong that I’m not willing to consider this? HAPPY HERE
Second Opinion
BEN CLAASSEN III
No, it’d be wrong for me to tell you what’s acceptable for your relationship. But are you truly not willing to consider it — as in, you would choose the East Coast over being with him? If your mind is made up that way, then I wonder if there’s enough love for you to be even thinking about marriage at all (it’s not like he’s
My husband is a marriage counselor who thinks we should separate. I wish I were kidding. We have been having problems for years, but he has never given legitimate counseling a try. For what it’s worth, we don’t have children, but how can I get him to practice what he preaches? DON’T WANT TO THROW IN THE TOWEL
I never like hearing about therapists
who don’t seem to believe in therapy, but I don’t know much backstory here. Perhaps he believes (rightly or wrongly) that marriage counseling is no match for a fundamental incompatibility. One thing your husband sees on an hourly basis is that counseling can’t force the desire to stay together if it’s missing. It won’t come as a surprise that I think that individual therapy could benefit you. It’s time to work on maximizing your own fulfillment, even if it means breaking away from something you think you want.
By Dr. Andrea Bonior
Send your questions to Dr. Andrea Bonior at baggage@wpost.com. Andrea is a local clinical psychologist and author of “The Friendship Fix.”
WEEK TEN: “Pushing myself to the limit”
CHALLENGER
STARTING WEIGHT
CURRENT WEIGHT
TOTAL POUNDS LOST
TOTAL POINTS
Nikki
263 lbs.
223 lbs.
40 lbs.
45
Emily
257 lbs.
228 lbs.
29 lbs.
36
Krystle
228 lbs.
201 lbs.
27 lbs.
35
Shaby
225 lbs.
201 lbs.
24 lbs.
34
Pamela
233 lbs.
212 lbs.
21 lbs.
23
Tony
280 lbs.
265 lbs.
15 lbs.
22
Points awarded weekly for % of body weight lost and competitive challenge.
“Things went great last week! I feel like I’ve really settled into my groove and continue to move full steam ahead! I used to think I just didn’t have the time to exercise and that I needed a workout buddy (especially in a group setting) to motivate me. But now I know that taking time for myself is an essential part of the health and wellness puzzle—and I’ve met a lot of people like me in my Zumba classes!”
“This past week was tough. The hardest thing I did, other than my workout with Megan, was taking the Body Pump class. It was both tough and rewarding because Body Pump gives you a full-body workout. I also plan to incorporate several new workouts over the next few weeks, including running and boxing.”
— Tony
— Emily
TR AINER TIP “Have a backup plan to keep from skipping a workout and always give yourself choices. Are you in the mood for kickboxing, or is it too nice outside to pass up a jog? The question should always be: ‘Which workout?’, not ‘Should I workout?’”
— MEGAN CHALLENGER: Tony LOCATION: Van Ness Gold’s Get Chal lenge Gold’s Get FitFit Chal lenge
Summer is almost here! Join now with $0 enrollment. Visit goldsgym.com for a location near you!
“During my training session last week, we used the TRX suspension trainer. It’s amazing how you can get a full-body workout from it just using your body weight! The hardest part was the triceps exercise. I have such weak arms, I really had to push myself! I was actually sore for days after. My favorite part: squats. I love the way squats shape my legs. Give me any leg workout and I’ll gladly do it!”
— Krystle