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DAN’S PAPERS

Page 34 May 31, 2013

danshamptons.com

Saturday (Cont’d from previous page) Route 114. Now I thought to call ahead to Turetsky. So they could have the hat ready. Crazy? Yes. This was from stress. My blood pressure was rising. After three tries, the call went through. “That was picked up last week,” I was told. “It’s not on the hook anymore.” “That wasn’t picked up by me,” I said. “Well, it’s picked up.” I thought maybe my wife had picked it up. So I tried calling her again, and on the first try got through. “Did you pick up my hat at the vet?” I asked. “I left it there. You were with me.” “I don’t remember you left your hat there though,” she said. “Well, I don’t remember leaving it there,

either. But they called last week to say I did.” “The person who owned the hat must have picked it up. It wasn’t you.” Entering Sag Harbor, I turned off Route 114 on High Street to avoid having to go all the way down to the Wharf, and so instead came down past Billy Joel’s house to Bay Street, turned right and pulled into the GeekHampton parking lot at the very end of the road there. As I pulled in, I saw a giant 40-foot-tall American flag hovering over the road just past GeekHampton. Two building cranes, one on each side of the road, were holding it up, and firemen in full regalia were everywhere. There was a young blonde woman firefighter, all dressed up in a black-and-yellow firefighter’s outfit that looked five sizes too big for her, directing traffic. I

snuck by her, into the lot. “Hey, Joe,” she said to the motorist arriving behind me. “If you came in ten minutes later, I couldn’t let you back out.” Apparently, the entire Memorial Day parade would be coming down Main Street and ending under that flag. I figured I’d need to get the Apple Macbook Pro fixed real quick or I’d be there an hour. I raced in, in a panic. But the place was packed with shoppers. “Oh, Jesus,” I said. I began to panic. I went over to the checkout counter. They know me. I pleaded for help. I have to get in and out. The customers stepped aside. And the minor fix was made, though it did take 15 minutes, while I kept glancing out the window to the firelady, over and over. When it was done, I started for the door, but the technician said, “I have to charge you for a quarter of an hour,” and headed over to the cash register to take up even more time. “I have to leave,” I wailed. Sheryl, who owns the place, came over. I yelled at her. “I can pay later. I just have to get out of here.” She backed off. I ran out. The rain had gotten worse. Now the firemen were taking the giant flag down. You don’t fly a flag in the rain. But what about the parade? Doug Matz No time to ask. I just ran for my car, pulled out Doug Matz Wizard of Matz Comfort Doug Doug Matz and headed down Bay Street thinking that any Wizard of Comfort Doug Matz Owner minute it would slam shut ahead of me. But it Wizard of+Comfort AC Super Tune Up is $79 Wizard of Comfort didn’t. I’d made it. But I was hyperventilating. tax Exp 5/15/12 AC Super Tune Up is $79 + Soon, I was up to Ferry Road and passing Gail’s AC Super Tune Up Non-Maintenance tax Exp 5/15/12 AC Super Tune Up is $79 + which is behind hedgerows, then making Customers Only Non-Maintenance is $79 Tune + TaxUp is $79 + house, AC Super Includes 16/15/13 hour of Exp coil 5/15/12 a dangerous U-turn and heading back to it. Customers Only tax Exp tax&Exp 5/15/12 cleaning drain Includes 1 hour ofpan coil Non-Maintenance Gail’s property is eight acres on the water, Non-Maintenance Non-Maintenance treatment, additional cost if cleaning & drain pan Customers Only with kayaks pulled up on her beach, a main Customers Only Customers Only more time is needed treatment, additional cost if Includes 1 hour Includes hour coil of coil Includes Standard Air of Filter house, a gazebo, a sandbox and jungle gym for more time is1needed cleaning drain pan cleaning &1 drain pan Includes up to hour & for the kids, tennis courts, basketball courts, a chip additional treatment, cost if cost if the tunetreatment, up,additional additional and putting green with a sandtrap, a swimming more time is needed more time time is 1290 Flanders cost Road if more is needed needed pool, poolhouse, swings from tall trees and, on 1290 Flanders Road Riverhead NY 11901 this occasion, as every year, a pizza truck with Riverhead NY 11901 an awning and a wood-burning stove not far 631-727-2760 from the screened-in porch. All the little kids 1290 Flanders Road 631-727-2760 1290 Flanders Road info@FlandersHVAC.com and dogs were running around, all the adults info@FlandersHVAC.com Riverhead NY NY 11901 Riverhead 11901 were standing around talking, even in this rain, www.FlandersHVAC.com www.FlandersHVAC.com and my hysteria did abate, but not by much. I 631-727-2760 631-727-2760 talked to some other guests, her son Jessie and info@FlandersHVAC.com info@FlandersHVAC.com his family, Mark Green and his family, lots of others. My wife came, I had two slices of rightwww.FlandersHVAC.com www.FlandersHVAC.com out-of-the-oven pizza, shook hands, thanked the host and left. The Artist-Writers Game party was next. But though I have been to the McEneaney’s before, I could not find the house. They live in a part of Sag Harbor that has rolling hills, numerous curving streets, and though I know the house when I see it, I found that with my GPS compromised because of the lack of phone service (damn summerpeople), I just got lost. It will be over before I get there, I thought. Finally, I found a parking space far down a hill, parked and was walking up the street toward the house in the rain, having left the Pre Season AC Special expires 5/15/12 & cannot be combined umbrella in the car, when I found myself joined Pre Season AC Special & purchases cannot be combined with any other expires offers or5/15/12 previous by a man wearing a baseball cap, who I thought with any other offers or previous purchases was Walter Isaacson. He seemed to be that, through the rain on my glasses. I said, “Sorry I haven’t sent that article I wrote about you to check for accuracy yet, but I didn’t finish it until Pre Season AC Special expires 5/15/12 & cannot be combined pre-season AC special expires 6/15/13 & cannot be combined yesterday. I sat for three weeks without the withwith anyany other offers or previous purchases other offers or previous purchases. Pre Season AC Special expires 5/15/12 & cannot be combined ending, because I hadn’t had time to finish it with AT any other offersuporor previous when I wrote it, but since I (Continued on page 44) This AD musT be presenTeD Time of Tune sysTem purchases esTimATe © 2001 AT500Tm

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