the
magazine of the students of
the university of miami
december 2012
The Political Issue
Distraction
1
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APPLY TODAY AT COM.MIAMI.EDU. CONTACT SOCGRAD@MIAMI.EDU OR (305) 284-5236. MORE INFO WWW.COM.MIAMI.EDU/GRADUATE-PROGRAMS
December 2012
CHECK
our onli OUT n culture e calend ar!
THE GUIDE 4
5
A Grande Finale
Celebrate New Year’s Eve at the newly opened Hyde Lounge. By Nina Anakar
The Last Supper It’s your last day on Earth and the most important question is...what do I eat? By Shivani Jani
6 Apocalypse-Proof Night
7
With the last night on Earth upon us, what should we do? By Michelle Contreras
Failure to Buffer
With Kazaa and Limewire behind us, there’s a new way to get your music fix. By Alexandra Smith
8
Zombie Attack
From 5Ks to bike rides, zombies have taken over Miami. By Ashley Martinez
IN THE LOOP
9 UR1nvited
Art meets music at this first of its kind festival. By Elizabeth Gallagher
10 Apocalypse 101
How to survive the apocalypse. By Ashley Brozic and Alexandra Solano
11 The Basel Bash
A handy guide to the Art Basel 2012 experience. By Jonathan Borge
13 Farewell, Miami
The best spots to hit
on your last day. By Lyssa Goldberg
14 The Ultimate Holiday WrapUp
The perfect presents for every person in your life. By Alexandra Solano
Our men’s basketball team seems unstoppable. By Patrick Riley
18 The Most Dangerous Game In the World
Jai Alai is probably the most unique sport to play right now. By Robert Pursell
19 Where Are They
We sit down with the former Cane. By Juan Pellerano
20 For the Love of the Game
SPORTS
16 The Basketball Diaries
Now? Randall Hill
The club scene pops into our biggest sports venues. By Sophianna Bishop
FASHION
22 State of Solitude
Distraction goes grunge. By Ana Calderone and Gabrielle Mottaz
29 The Grunge Movement
How to wear this season’s trends. By Adam Tomashek
MAIN EVENT 30 The Final
Countdown
Is it all really over on December 21? By Alexandra Solano
34 A Helping Hand
Canes use their own experiences to foster change. By Christian Smith
38 Filthy Flesh
We reveal the truth about where your meat comes from. By Nicole Vila
42 Young, Wild And Anxious
We’re always busy and stressed, but why? By Emma Holland
END NOTES
46 Where Would You Hide On Apocalypse Day? By Neil Bragdon
The Last Issue Ever
Distraction
1
Letter from the Editor
December 2012
distractionmagazine.com WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON YOUR LAST DAY ON EARTH? Editor-in-Chief _Jonathan Borge Executive Editor_Ashley Brozic Managing Editor_Claudia Aguirre Art Directors_Sophianna Bishop and Ivana Cruz Assistant Art Directors_Nan Gallagher and Megan McCrink Photo Editors_Kelly Smith and Raquel Zaldivar Assistant Photo Editor_Karli Evans Copy Chief_Alexandra Solano The Guide & End Notes Editor_Christine Keeler In The Loop Editor _Nicole Vila Sports Editor_Patrick Riley “I’d eat a lot of Assistant Sports Editor_Kristen Spillane chocolate cake and Fashion Editor_Ana Calderone play with my cats. Not kidding” Assistant Fashion Editor_Gabrielle Mottaz The Main Event Editor_Christian Smith Web Master_Rosa Orihuela Culture Blog Editor_Kristen Calzadilla Music Blog Editor_Hyan De Freitas “I would eat with Rick Photo Blog Editor_Maggie Fragel “I would try and Ross and make him Student Life Blog Editor_Shivani Aluru make it to Platform 9 take me to his favor3/4!” - JB Features Blog Editor_Taylor Duckett ite strip clubs to rage Video Editor_Kappes Chatfield until the end.” Co-Public Relations Managers_Rachel Kliger and Casey Gasinowski Assistant PR Managers_Justin Borroto and Morgan Chicchelly Social Media Editor_Jonathan Fernandez Business Manager_Natasha Ramchandani Advertising Sales Representative_Alexandra Hurtado Advertising Sales Representative_Michael Synder Faculty Advisor_Randy Stano Contributors Nina Anakar, Writer Holly Bensur, Photographer vv, Photographer Nell Bragdon, Writer Mariana Espindola, Photographer Elizabeth Gallgher, Writer Servani Ghosh, Designer Lyssa Goldberg, Writer Emma Holland, Writer Shivani Jani, Writer Ashley Martinez, Writer
Erin Meagher, Designers Kacie Nelson, Photographer Juan Pellerano, Writer Robert Pursell, Writer Nicholas Rodriguez, Photographer Alexandra Smith, Writer Chris Stampar, Photographer Adam Tomashek, Writer Danielle Ungermann, Photographer Lily Zhang, Photographer
In 1999, the most popular artists whose singles made it onto Billboard’s Hot 100 list included TLC, Cher, Sugar Ray, Britney Spears, Jennifer Lopez, Ricky Martin, Smash Mouth and Christina Aguilera. Back then, Carson Daly was still relevant, Old Navy was super trendy and “Toy Story 2” was the greatest thing to have happened since Fruit Loops. And while every girl in my third-grade writing class swore to be a “Genie In A Bottle,” I was becoming more and more anxious about Y2K. According to every reporter on Earth, computer systems across the globe were expected to crash when 2000 arrived. Governments spent billions of dollars in preparation for the disaster and kids like me, who didn’t really understand it all, thought Y2K meant nuclear war, meteors falling from the sky and bidding adieu to strawberry-flavored Pop-Tarts. How tragic. As we all know, nothing happened. We entered a new millennium and with it arrived MP3s, the “Thong Song” and “Meet the Parents” (“I have nipples Greg, could you milk me?” was the funniest live ever). This time, every girl in fourth grade was preaching about “What A Girl Wants.” Now, it’s 2012 and our existence is once again in question. Kim Kardashian and Kanye West live in our same county. There’s a thing called Honey Boo Boo popping up on our TVs. And let’s not forget that Snooki’s raising a child. The end, my friends, is possibly coming. But whether you abide by Mayan beliefs or think it’s all phony, there’s only one question we can ask ourselves should the apocalypse strike: What Would Shalala Do? Good luck!
WE LIKE YOU
When it comes to contributors, we’re not picky. Whether you’ve found your niche in a bio book, you’re notorious for doing “nothing” at the comm or business school, or you’re halfway into your college career and still wave that “undeclared major” flag, we want to hear what you have to say. Distraction is written for students, by students, and covers the full spectrum of student life here at The U. If you want to get involved with us or have any questions, email our editor-in-chief, Jonathan Borge, at j.borge@umiami.edu and he will get you in contact with the right people. December 2012 Distraction is dubbed “The Last Issue Ever” The magazine is produced four times per year, twice a semester. City Graphics and NU-PRESS Miami printed 6,500 copies of the magazine on 8.5 x 11 inch, 60-pound coated text paper 4/4. The entire magazine is printed four-color and saddle stitch bound. Most text is nine-point Minion Pro with 1.8 points of leading set ragged with a combination of bold, medium and italic. All pages were designed using Adobe Creative Suite 5 software InDesign with photographs and artwork handled in PhotoShop and Illustrator. For additional information please visit distractionmagazine.com. Questions and comments can be mailed to 5100 Brunson Dr., Coral Gables Fla. 33146-2105, dropped into LC150-A or emailed to j.borge@umiami.edu. All articles, photographs and illustrations are copyrighted by the University of Miami.
ABOUT US
2
Distraction
Masthead
Jonathan Borge
On the Cover There’s something fascinating about seeing the world come to an end, which is exactly why we devoted this issue to the apocalypse. The pocket watch on the cover is meant to depict an impending countdown to the end. Of course, we didn’t forget to include the ibis, which is the last animal to leave a location before a storm and the first to return once it’s over. design_ivana cruz. photo_serbani ghosh.
Letters to Distraction
“The fashion editorial was gorgeous and I loved the look of the vintage bathing suits, but that’s a trend I do not think I’m going to try.” -Stephanie Martin, Junior
“I liked reading the food stories because it introduced me to restaurants I would have never known otherwise.”
E IN L ON OW
-Katelyn Kozbial, Junior
-Janmarco Santiago, Senior
“I enjoyed the interview with the bartender from Baracuda...very interesting insight.”
“That cover. Sexy. The design was so intricate, so complex, so beautiful.”
-Matt Ciabattari, Junior
“The pop culture politics quiz was so useless. Who would want to pet a donkey anyway?”
-Vanessa Ramos, Senior
HAVE AN OPINION ABOUT THIS ISSUE? EMAIL IT TO FEEDBACK. DISTRACTION@ GMAIL.COM
distractionmagazine.com
N
Are You Sleeping Enough?
The Rise of Miami Basketball
We explore the effects of sleep deprivation and poor nutrition. Are you that healthy? Most students aren’t sleeping enough.
Check out an extended version of Patrick Riley’s story on our men’s basketball team. He followed Julian Gamble for five days and reports. The Last Issue Ever
Distraction
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T h e g u i d e winter
T g 2012
A GRANDE FINALE
words_nina anakar. photo_courtesy of hyde. design_sophianna bishop. Only Hyde South Beach makes hula girl lamps and palm tree cushions glamorous. Nestled past the red-carpeted stairs afront the SLS hotel, this indoor-outdoor venue is perfect for a long and savory night. New Year’s Eve is set to be extra exclusive with a lineup that is sure to surprise. Yes, they have bottle girls and champagne sparklers. Yes, dudes must spend money. But any place that serves liquid nitrogen caipirinhas and isn’t melting in neon is a place of taste. Plus, the life-sized sterling ducky at the end of the pool is really cute. Where else in Miami can you take a break from table dancing to have a cigarette under the stars? 1701 Collins Ave., Miami Beach, 305-674-1701; sbe.com
G food
Theguide
THE LAST SUPPER
words_shivani jani. photo_ holly bensur. design_sophianna bishop.
SAKAYA KITCHEN
3401 North Miami Ave., Miami, 305-576-8096; sakayakitchen.com The fusion of Korean and Mexican food offered here is just as weird as Katy Perry and Russell Brand’s marriage, but this one actually works. Who knew Korean food in taco form could be so good? The Kalbi tacos are a popular favorite and the sweet and salty ginger Brussels sprouts are surprisingly good.
THE
WHISK GOURMET
7382 SW 56th Ave., Miami, 786-268-8350; whiskgourmet.com Home-style gourmet comfort food sounds like a meal from heaven. Actually, it’s a lot closer: South Miami. Start off with a bang with the much loved fried green tomatoes. Low country shrimp and smooth grits with smoked bacon pieces, scallions and cremini mushrooms are a polished Southern staple also offered and the only real problem you’ll face is trying to stay awake after such a satisfying meal.
Daring Dish E MOR NE! I L N O
LA MOON
97 SW Eigth St., Brickell, 305-379-5617; lamoonrestaurantmiami.com Its Supermoon Perro puts all other hotdogs to shame with bacon, chorizo and five succulent sauces: pink, garlic, ketchup, mustard and pineapple. And they’ve given the traditional hotdog an extreme makeover by laying a quail egg on top. The combination may sound odd, but venturing into unknown territory might land you a new favorite dish. Besides, telling someone you had a hot dog with quail egg makes you sound a bit more exotic, no te parece?
HARRY’S PIZZERIA
3918 North Miami Ave., Miami, 786275-4963; harryspizzeria.tumblr.com Known for its fresh and locally sourced ingredients, Harry’s Pizzeria in the Design District is the spot for some top quality pies. The Rock Shrimp Pizza, the most requested dish, offers a unique blend of flavors with local Cape Canaveral rock shrimp, gooey manchego cheese, grilled lemon, scallions and cilantro.
CAFÉ SAMBAL
500 Brickell Key Drive, Brickell, 305913-8288; cafesambal.com If you’re a hopeless romantic, Café Sambal has one of the most spectacular backdrops for your next (or last) date. The melt-in-your-mouth miso honey-charred sea bass, served with purple rice and braised baby bok choy is a popular main course. Though this place might empty your bank account, it’s worth the splurge.
THE RUSTY PELICAN
3201 Rickenbacker Causeway, Key Biscayne; 305-361-3818; therustypelican.com This iconic spot serves up classic baked crab cakes covered in Japanese crumbs and the side of chipotle aioli adds an extra kick. The Patagonia Tooth Fish is served with smoky plantain mash, Anaheim peppers and papaya salsa. It’s a unique blend of earthy and tropical flavors that, served with Sancerre white wine, will have you buzzed and satisfied.
ICE BOX CAFE
1657 Michigan Avenue, Miami Beach, 305-538-8448; iceboxcafe.com The Bomb Cake at Ice Box Cafe is Oprah’s favorite cake, which says something because, let’s be honest, the woman has had her fair share of desserts. It’s an explosion of chocolate everything, packed with layers of dark chocolate, creamy cheesecake brownie, chocolate mousse filling and chocolate ganache. Oprah says it’s “da bomb.”
EL MAGO DE LAS FRITAS
5828 SW Eighth St., Miami, 305-2668486; elmagodelasfritas.com This is the presidential hot spot for fast Cuban food that will satisfy anyone’s craving for a burger. The frita presidencial, in honor of President Obama’s visit to the local joint, is the Cuban hamburger topped with fried potato wisps and cheese. Try a frita with fried egg on top for even more artery-clogging goodness. What have you got to lose? The zombies are coming, anyway. The Last Issue Ever Distraction 5
G to do
Theguide
AN APOCALYPSE-PROOF NIGHT
words_ michelle contreras. photo_kelly smith and raquel zaldivar. design_sophianna bishop. Here’s the scenario: the world has fallen into an abyss of darkness. God knows what creatures are roaming outside ready for their first bite of human flesh, and, most unfortunately, the power is out. While many will try to convince you to live it up and paint the town red, you know that hailing a cab in this time of distress will be tougher than all Grove nights put together. So what do you do? You stay in (tragically). But don’t fret, Distraction is here to show you how to make the most of your last moments ever.
THE WHO:
THE EATS:
Do you keep the bitchy girlfriend or controlling boyfriend around? Nope. It’s the end of the world and you’ll never have to see this person again, so kick them to the curb in whatever manner you deem necessary. Then call your best friends over and have one final college-style bash.
Should you eat leftover food? Ugh. That fruit at the far corner of the fridge? Ew. The solution: raw cake batter! Since you can’t actually bake it (remember, you have no electricity), mix it in a bowl and offer everyone a spoon. Not only is it what everyone really wants to do, but also it’s the easiest party prep you’ve ever had to deal with. Why should you have to work on your last night ever?
THE GET-UP:
What do you wear to an apocalypse-survival party? You want to look like a million bucks. Dawn the tux you bought for prom (it’s ok if it’s a little smug) or that dress you splurged your grocery budget on now that you’ll never get to go clubbing in it. As the night continues, however, you might want to bring out that gas mask the exterminator left behind and some khaki pants, a T-shirt and combat boots. Why? Let’s assume you’ll be the only cool person to survive once civilization has ended (think Will Smith in “I Am Legend”).
THE DRINKS:
Since Gulf is sold out, survey the meager offerings in your fridge. Serving too much booze might make you start contemplating the meaning of life and kill your mood. No booze and it’s just a bunch of ridiculously dressed people sitting around waiting to die. So scoop your melting ice cream into a cup, pour in the rum and tequila you have on hand and slurp up. A spiked milkshake is definitely the way to go.
6
Distraction
The Guide
TO SLEEP, OR NOT TO SLEEP?
See this is where the phrase “you’ll sleep when you’re dead” comes morbidly full circle. What you do is you bring all your pillows into the living room floor like you’ve always wanted to do when you were a kid (or maybe have done after a rough Grove night ending solo) and lay down on your awesome little tempur-pedic mound. You contemplate on religion and philosophy for, like, five minutes before you remember “300” and the survivor plan you had made, which pumps you up for the epic end. Snap out of it and party on.
THE GAMES:
Considering you’ll be partially drunk on rum-rum raisin milkshakes, Twister seems like a good idea, especially when tipsy. Place a shot glass on every circle. When it’s your turn, drink the shot inside of the circle before placing your hand on the color the spinner landed on. Simple enough, right? If you fall and lose your balance, that’s one beer for every slip up. Drink up!
Consider this your plan to cheat the universe. Have fun, grab your gas mask, a large knife (to defend yourself should you survive), and wait for the final boom. And hey, if this plan doesn’t work and you’re fried like the rest of humanity, you have to admit that dying inside a fridge, dressed like Jason Voorhees (from “Friday the 13th”, for you non-horror movie freaks out there) isn’t a bad way to go.
G music
Theguide
FAILURE TO BUFFER ARE MUSIC DOWNLOADS BECOMING OBSOLETE? words_alexandra smith. design_sophianna bishop. Not long ago, the only way to listen to a song was to claim its ownership first, even if it meant breaking the law. Napster, Limewire and Morpheus were as talked about as Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. But as technology evolves, so does the way we listen to music. Enter the age of streaming, in which audio files need not be downloaded before use. You can listen to music live without having a permanent copy of it, so long as you have a steady Internet connection. Spotify is an example of this new way of curating music. The program allows you to make your own playlists without having to purchase any albums. Then there’s Pandora, which uses unique technology created by music analysts to give you an individualized playlist based on your artist and song selections. And when you are bored of Pandora’s selections, 8tracks lets you listen to playlists created by other users, often containing mashups and original content unique to that site. But like everything, streaming has its negatives. Many Internet radio companies have put limits on how much a user can listen to free music online. Spotify, for example, has a listening cap that forces you to pay a $4.99 fee for unlimited streaming after ten hours of use per month. Pandora uses this strategy to make a profit as well.
Sounds Like Yesterday
Moreover, with the exception of Spotify, most online sites choose the songs and the order in which you hear them, allowing only a certain amount of skips per station or playlist. As of yet, streaming music has had little or no legality issues, whereas downloading has its fair share of lawsuits. It is uncertain whether online services such as Youtube video-to-audio converters abide by copyright laws. In our own student handbook, distributing copyright material infringes upon federal law and university policy. If the university is notified about alleged copyright violations, the students would be disconnected from UM’s server network. So streaming, in effect, has helped us escape the risk of getting in trouble for obtaining music quickly and easily. Although the future of downloads is uncertain, the music industry’s profits from digital downloads are not on the decline. Market research firm Nielsen has reported that digital album sales this year are up by 15 percent in the U.S. Perhaps what is happening is that Internet streaming, rather than acting as a replacement to downloads, is actually just introducing listeners to new music that they can then purchase online. As advances for obtaining music are introduced to the market, the future of the music industry lies at our fingertips.
Six Spots to Find Your Vinyl Record Fix
P
PANDORA
Launched in 2005.
PANDORA
SPOTIFY
Launched in 2008.
8TRACKS
Launched in 2008.
UPCOMING R.I.P
E MOR E! IN ONL
words_taylor duckett. photo_raquel zaldivar.
1 SWEAT RECORDS
5505 NE Second Ave., Miami, 786-693-9309; sweatrecordsmiami.com Sweat Records has been open since 2005 and was co-founded by a former WVUM DJ. But unlike most stores, this place also serves as an event space, coffee house and Internet lounge. Comedians have performed and origami lessons have been taught. It’s located 20 minutes away from campus. If you want a record store as diverse as your music taste (with low prices), this is the spot.
2 GOODWILL
SW 40 St. and SW 58th Ave., Miami; goodwillsouthflorida.org If you enjoy going thrift shopping and want to find inexpensive vinyls, check out Goodwill. There is one located close to campus on Bird Road. This one is not your typical Goodwill; it is a large and well-organized superstore and they have a little bit of everything. If you need a way to spend a rainy day or just want to beat the odds and find the best deal possible, check it out.
KAZAA
3 YESTERDAY AND TODAY RECORDS
9274 SW 40th St., Miami, 305-554-1020; vintagerecords.com Yesterday and Today Records has been in Miami for over 30 years and is one of the oldest independent record stores. They carry vinyls of all lengths and genres for affordable prices. In addition to selling records, they also buy collections, too, just in case you need to free up some space in your garage. It’s 15 minutes away from campus and worth the drive.
4 LONG LIVE ROCK AND OTHER OBSESSIONS
2510 Biscayne Blvd., Miami, 305-200-3612; Located in downtown Miami, Long Live Rock and Other Obsessions has vinyls ranging in price from $2 to $10. Although they’re a local business, they always have a wide variety of records- even the really old ones that you never thought you’d find. Next time you’re downtown, swing by and check them out.
Inactive in 2012.
NAPSTER
Merged with Rhapsody in 2011.
FROSTWIRE
Launched in 2005.
LIMEWIRE
In court since October 2010.
MORPHEUS
No longer exists.
The Last Issue Ever
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G student life
Theguide
SLEEP OR DIE
WALKING DEAD. Jessica Carriere applies makeup to transform into a zombie. She attended the ZMBLND event in October with Vanessa Maranchello. Students perform the “Thriller” dance at Tobacco Road.
E MOR E! N I L ON According to Dr. Salim Dib, assistant professor of neurology at the Miller School of Medicine, lack of sleep can cause irritability, depression, reduced cognitive performance and a decrease in your ability to pay attention and retain information.
A study by the British Medical Journal conducted in 2000 showed that driving after being awake for 18 hours had the same or worse effects as being drunk.
ZOMBIE ATTACK
words_ashley martinez. photo_ danielle ungermann and courtesy of claudia osorio. design_sophianna bishop. Ominous moans. A trance-like trek. And an incessant look of hunger upon a lackluster, bloody face. From “The Walking Dead” to “Resident Evil,” this character is no longer left to the imagination of screenwriters (cue the cannibalistic face eater on the MacArthur Causeway). Zombies have now arrived. This craze has taken over Miami, spawning several events around the city such as the Zombie Bike Ride, Run for Your Lives (a zombie 5K), the Tobacco Road Zombie Party and the Lincoln Road Zombie Walk. “It’s late at night on Lincoln Road and people dressed like zombies gather and start walking around,” said junior Stephanie Simeon, who has attended the Lincoln Road walk. “People in military outfits chase them down. It sounds like the weirdest thing but it’s really fun.” This obsession with the supernatural has always captivated people, such as Claudia Osorio, an assistant registrar at the UM School of Law. Her love for the undead has brought her to organize a dance troop for Thrill the World, a international dance set to “Thriller” that takes place every October. This event is aimed to set world records and raise money for local charities. Last 8 Distraction The Guide
year, 29 countries participated and 12, 297 people danced to Michael Jackson’s eerie tune. “I think it’s fun to dress up and act a little crazy once in a while,” Osorio said. “I just think zombies are fun and bring us back to our youthful days. I mean, what kid didn’t like dressing up to try and scare someone?” The fad has extended to organizations such as UM’s Office of Emergency Management who, along with the Miller School of Medicine, recently used a zombie theme to draw students into a practice run for their Point of Dispensing Plan. The school’s October Zombie U event tested the efficiency of managing 100,000 doses of medical countermeasures by offering Swedish Fish and Sour Patch Kids to participants as remedies to the Solanum virus, a fictitious ailment caused by zombies. “If you prepare for a zombie apocalypse, you pretty much prepare for any sort of emergency,” said Jacob Winston, a senior majoring in biomedical engineering who thought up the idea . “This type of theme, zombies, is kind of a fad. But there’s something about the undead that gets people excited. It’s an interesting concept that speaks to our age group.”
Not sleeping can lead to more work-related errors, impaired immune systems and eventually increases the risk of diabetes and cardiovascular disease.
Caffeine can help you get through the afternoon, especially if paired with a nap, but it does nothing to make up for the sleep you’re missing. “There’s no substitute for sufficient sleep. The way to deal with it is get more sleep overnight, that’s the bottom line,” Dib explained.
Art aficionados, pookie heads and basers unite at the first-ever UR1 Festival. words_elizabeth f. gallagher. photo_peter pete. design_erin meagher. Now that we’ve all purchased six days of Ultra tickets and caravanned a pocketful of electric daisies to Orlando, it’s time to think of yet another music festival. Every major business mogul knows that a sure-fire way to make millions while successfully pissing off city authorities is to throw a multi-stage music and art festival. So when the art gods and the creators of Ultra got together to create UR1, Miami’s prayers for live music and art were answered. Whoever said festie season was strictly between February and September was seriously disturbed. Get ready to overdraft your credit cards, kids, it’s time for yet another excuse to wear neon glasses without lenses and spend $20 on a watered-down Redbull and vodka.
On December 8 and 9, Bayfront Park and Klipsch Amphitheatre will be fused with pookies, hipsters, burnouts, Eurotrash beatnik artists and everything in between for the debut of the very first UR1 Music and Art Festival. With a $149 price tag, this two-day colorful escapade is sure to have foreigners and locals alike buzzing over the extensive lineup, which includes hip hop, indie rock and house acts. So if you’re willing to sacrifice a couple of nights in Club Richter (this is during finals, after all), an ample amount of serotonin and your parent’s hard-earned cash, then UR1 is for you. But if you can’t make the festivities, you’ll be sure to find countless sepia-filtered photos on Instagram. Rave to the grave, kittens!
BANDS
COCODRILLS
WHAT TO E XPECT • Headliner Kanye West and Lenny Kravitz hitting the stage. • Overpriced water (between $5 to $10 a pop, literally). • Flashbacks to your favorite artists’ tunes, including those of Jane’s Addiction, The Offspring, Lou Reed and Animal Collective. • Your fellow weekly Space Cadets parked at the exclusive Space stage, including Bob Sinclair, Pete Tong, Erick Morillo and Armand van Helden. • Fannypack pick-pocketers.
• A market of drugs whose names you never even knew existed. • An exclusive art exhibit by
R.E.M’s Russel Young.
MOR ONLI E NE!
• All of your favorite VIP remixes. • American Apparel’s entire collection.
• Historical pop-art installations by Andy Warhol, Keith Haring and Jim Dine. • Art students that didn’t quite make it into the Art Basel exhibitions (but are still talented and hungry for recognition). • Extensive security (don’t forget your ID!) • A special light show tribute to Nouguchi’s “Tower of Light” by Andy Warhol’s very own protégé Ultra Violet.
words and photo_lily zhang. DJ DUO. Cocodrills is made up of two musicians, Christian “Pridef” Diaz and Adam Cruz. This Miami-based group is truly passionate about their work. They are two down to earth guys that come together to put on a great show for their audience. They bicker like opposites but their deep friendship and enthusiasm is obvious. Most importantly, they take pride in their original sound that got them to the stages of the UR1 music festival. The The Last Last Issue Issue Ever Ever
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APOCALYPSE 101: SURVIVING THE END OF THE WORLD
words_ashley brozic and alexandra solano. design_ ashley brozic.
We’ve heard talk of the apocalypse for years and now that December is here, it’s time to prepare. Be it falling stars, raging aliens, monstrous zombies, a worldwide tsunami or the return of the Black Plague, the outcome is the same: we’re all doomed. And since the end is inevitably here, Distraction has created the ultimate survival kit. Whether you’ll be the last man standing or the first to go, here is everything you need to know in eager anticipation of the apocalypse.
1.
4.
As for your weapons, a gun, a harpoon or a steak knife from your kitchen drawers will work. Whatever you choose, make sure it’s sharp and fast. There’s nothing like chasing aliens with dull knives. Flashlights and rape whistles are highly suggested as well.
keep you filled for a few days unless you hit that emergency stash of Mary Jane you’ve hidden in a scent-concealing spot (old sneakers, maybe?). Zombies are known for having some major munchies after a good toke.
LOOK BADASS
Shave your head. Yes, shave it all. You can’t have all that fluffy hair getting in your face when you’re trying to escape death. Dawn your best combat gear as well. When you get weird, you get real.
6.
2.
Raid out Costco. GATHER SUPPLIES Caprisun, Cap’n Crunch (AND HIDE THE and their fine selection WEED) of cheese will surely
KNOW YOUR ENEMY
Although it’s too soon to tell whether doomsday will be the product of a pandemic or a Pandora’s box of monsters, be prepared. What you’ll encounter will probably be taller than 10 feet, have eyes full of puss-filled pupils, an abyss of a mouth and veins upon ghastly skin. And if deadly diseases are creeping through the airwaves, get yourself a gasmask.
5.
SECURE THE ARMORY
3.
FIND EASY TRANSPORTATION
Now that gas stations will probably have been blown up, it’s time to trade in that Prius for something more practical. Remind your mom to overnight your old rollerblades and that Razor you got for Christmas ‘99. Bikes, longboards and skateboards are also options. If all else fails,
ASSEMBLE THE TROOPS
Although you may feel like Rambo, you can’t possibly take on a spacecraft full of evil E.T.’s solo no matter how many Reese’s Pieces you may have. Gather an assortment of people, friends, foreigners and foes. Put that roid head to good use at the front of the corollary. Hold on to that pushover friend of yours- bullying is excused during a time like this. Befriend the Texan. Someone has gotta start planting the crops, right?
5.
DON’T FORGET TO PARTY
So in the event that you survive, a celebration will definitely be in order. Have a nice bottle of champagne or even a bottle of whiskey (if you’re man enough) to celebrate this victory. Hell, you’re alive! It’s time to crank up some tunes and get your Wobble on.
Disclaimer: Distraction does not condone any illegal or violent activity and the vernacular used in this column is not intended to offend. The column is written in a humorous style that is intended for entertainment purposes and is not to be interpreted as truth nor based on reality.
10 Distraction In the Margins
HOW DANGEROUS
ARE THESE MONSTERS? EVIL ROBOTS ALIENS
THE CHUPACABRA
MEDUSA THE YETI GODZILLA
THE BASEL BASH Miami, like a sexy, forgotten, barely-American stepchild, always comes second best. New Yorkers dress better than us. Angelenos produce better movies. New Orleaners have more soul. And the westerners out in Silicon Valley never think to put us on the tech bubble map. Is our beloved 305 just bereft of any talent? Sure, we’re the hottest. The loudest. We’re as raucous as they come. But in our
defense, there’s more to this town than blonde hair and overflowing booze. Come December 6, the official start of Art Basel Miami Beach, the art world glitterati will prove, for the 11th time, that when it comes to art, Miami reigns supreme. It’s then that world-renowned editors, photographers, stylists, fashion icons, bloggers, museum curators, exhibitors, investors, and, well, artists, will flock to our shores to
engage in the week-long bonanza that is Basel. Of course, most Basel-goers, many of which are billionaire oligarchs ready to drop a pretty penny, only arrive for the partying, the schmoozing and the incessant need to prove to be VIP (this is Miami, after all). But even then, there are plenty of free and public events open to the rest of us schmucks. Here’s your guide to everything you should have already RSVP’d to.
words_jonathan borge. photo_courtesy of miami art museum, lowe art museum, art basel miami beach. design_nan galllagher. The Last Issue Ever
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Sitges
Dorado Hilton, Puerto Rico
The Main Fair
The Miami Beach Convention Center will be transformed into a massive art viewing space, where over 260 galleries will showcase the works of more than 2,000 international artists for Art Basel Miami Beach. Come here if you want to peruse a ton of work in a short period of time or if you’re looking for your next $20,000 painting. One day tickets are $49, December 6 – 9, Miami Beach Convention Center; miamibeach.artbasel.com
Lower Manhattan
The Fancy Stuff
It’s not all about Art Basel Miami Beach this week. There are dozens of other independent art exhibits and fairs popping up across town, from Miami Beach to Wynwood, Coral Gables to the Design District. Some include Artexpo Miami, Context, Art Asia, Seven, Aqua Art Miami, Ink Miami, NADA Art Fair, Select Fair, Untitled, Verge Art Miami Beach, SCOPE, Red Dot, PULSE, Design Miami and Fountain Miami. Take your pick.
Miami’s not shy on luxury, so of course Basel will carry some of the most glamorous and lavish events in tow. While most of these are invitation-only soirees, it’s worth a shot: MOCA’s Vanity Fair Party at MOCA (December 4), Visionaire, Mr. Porter and Net-APorter’s Jonathan Horowitz Free Store installation (December 6) and Societe Perrier’s private parties (December 4 and 6). For $100, you can also attend Miami Art Museum’s Crash the Ball after party, which gets you a night of dancing, cocktails and desserts by pastry chef Hedy Goldsmith.
Art Miami
The Black Lords at Lords South Beach
The Satellite Fairs
Located in Midtown and known as the longestrunning contemporary art fair, the 23rd edition of Art Miami will collaborate with CONTEXT, the newest fair to arrive, this year and will exhibit international artwork from the 20th and 21st centuries. World-famous graffiti artist Banksy has partnered with CONTEXT to create five walls displaying his work. Art Miami is located in Midtown and CONTEXT in Wynwood; art-miami.com and contextartmiami. com
The Parties & Performances
Every club kid knows that Miami Art Week is like a shortened version of Miami Music Week. DJs, musicians and producers will pour into our top music venues, so we can only expect some of 2012’s last major blowouts to happen then. On December 5, Rick Ross and Wale will perform at The Fillmore and Morgan Page will stop by Mansion. If you can sneak in, there’s an invitation-only, Vh1-sponsored bash happening at SCOPE on December 6, and on December 7, Sweat Records is bringing Chromatics to the Gusman Center. December 8 is when UR1 officially kicks off, but we’ll also welcome Tiesto at LIV and French Express at The Vagabond. Finally, on December 9, Pete Tong, Damian Lazarus and Seth Troxler will head to Mansion while Night Plane will drop by the Electric Pickle.
12 Distraction In the Loop
Desi Santiago and Perrier present “The Black Lords,” a building-sized work of art that is expected to take over the entire façade of the Lords South Beach and turn it into Gypsy, a black dog that has previously appeared in Santiago’s work. The commission will be the largest in Santiago’s career. December 6 -9, 11 a.m. to 2 a.m., Lords South Beach; lordssouthbeach.com
Miami Art Museum’s New Work Miami 2013
About a dozen Miami-based artists were commissioned to create for MAM’s latest exhibit, “New Work Miami 2013,” which expresses the unique, eclectic art forms and practices of local artists and includes installations, sculptures, paintings and photography. Through May 2013, Miami Art Museum; miamiartmuseum.org
Pop-Up Piano Miami 2012
For the second year in a row, we can expect eight Steinway & Sons pianos to be strategically placed around Miami in locations such as Gigi’s, Soho Beach House, Sugarcane Raw Bar & Grill, Wynwood Cigar Factory and others. Local artists will craft each of the eight pianos and local musicians will actually perform on the pianos at times that will be announced the week of on social media. After Basel, each piano will be donated to charity. December 6 – 9; popuppianomia.com
Untitled
Surrounded Islands, Biscayne Bay
“Bliss” By Ragnar Kjartansson
Art Basel Miami Beach and the Museum of Contemporary Art will host Ragnar Khartansson’s 12-hour film, “Bliss,” on December 8, which will be part of Art Basel’s Art Video program. In addition to “Bliss,” you’ll be able to enjoy SoundScape Park and view 60 film and video works on the 7,000-square-foot projection wall outside the New World Center. December 5 – 9, New World Center; artbasel. com/video
Christo and Jeanne Claude at the Lowe Our very own Lowe Art Museum will present “Prints and Objects,” a collection of artwork designed to represent the 40-plus illustrious careers of renowned artists Christo and Jeanne Claude. The couple, who is perhaps most famous for wrapping massive pink fabric around 11 islands in Miami, worked tirelessly between 1962 and 2004. Through January 13, 2013, Lowe Art Museum; lowemuseum.org
Fifth Annual Cane Fair
Situated inside the Wynwood Building, the work of UM art students will be presented at the University of Miami Gallery from December 4 through 28. Head here to see other students’ photos, sculptures, prints, installations, paintings and ceramics. December 4 – 28, Wynwood Building; miami.edu
FAREWELL, MIAMI. If you only had one last day in Miami, deciding how to spend it would be difficult. Because of this, Distraction mapped out an itinerary full of stops you must make to enjoy Miami at its finest. words_lyssa goldberg. photo_raquel zaldivar. design_nan gallagher. 1. Bill Baggs State Park 1200 Crandon Blvd., Key Biscayne, 305-361-5811; floridastateparks.org Inside this state park you’ll find a picturesque beach at the end of Key Biscayne. A quaint lighthouse and white sands set the scene for a relaxing stop. Snorkeling and kayaking are just two of the many outdoorsy activities Bill Baggs offers. 2. Mary Brickell Village 901 South Miami Ave., Brickell; marybrickellvillage.com Whether you’re grabbing lunch at a trendy restaurant or even a casual joint, you will be surrounded by suitclad men and stiletto-wearing women at this Brickell playground. Come here only once you’ve cleaned up, though. The place is swank. 3. Marlins Park 501 Marlins Way, Miami, 305-480-1300; miami.marlins.mlb.com Baseball season might be over, but this stadium is an attraction in and of itself. The futuristic design looks like a flying saucer from outer space landed right in the heart of Little Havana. The neon green walls of the park, the multimillion-dollar home run sculpture and the bobblehead museum are just a few of the spectacles. You can also hit up Taste of Miami for a special culinary experience or the Clevelander, the in-park bar that comes with an indoor pool.
Bill Baggs State Park
4. The Miami Heat at AAA 601 Biscayne Blvd., Miami, 786-777-1000; nba.com/heat Undeniably Miami’s best sports team, the Heat – fresh off of their NBA championship win last season – are a sight worth seeing. Spend your last night watching the Big Three, now joined by Ray Allen, tag teaming and pulling off impressive alley oops and three-pointers.
5. Wynwood Artsy and a hipster’s paradise, make sure to don your most ironic eyewear when walking through the many galleries you’ll find in Wynwood. Take a stroll past the Wynwood Walls, Instagram every mural in sight or spend the night at hot spots like Wood Tavern, Lester’s, Wynwood Kitchen and Bar and Bloom. 6. Shops at Midtown 3401 N. Miami Ave., Midtown; shopmidtownmiami.com Midtown is rapidly becoming the hot spot for Miami’s trendiest eateries. Go bar hopping and catch a quick bite during happy hour at some up-and-coming restaurants including Ricochet, Sakaya Kitchen, The Cheese Course, Salumeria 104, Mercadito and nearby Gigi and Bardot. 7. South Pointe Park 1 Washington Ave., Miami Beach, 305-673-7006; web.miamibeachfl.gov You’ve worked your way past Fifth Street into SoFi, Miami Beach’s most southern neighborhood. Follow the paved pathways and walk up the grassy hills as you look out onto the Atlantic Ocean. Savor the sun rays and breezy air and take a late-night dip into the water. Climbing the rocky jetty as far out as possible is a must. 8. Fontainebleau Miami Beach 4441 Collins Ave., Miami Beach, 305-538-2000; fontainebleau.com The Fontainebleau is one of the most luxurious hotels in all of Miami Beach and its enormous complex holds much more than one last night’s worth of activities. Take an illicit elevator ride and explore the vicinity or a dip in the infinity pool. From LIV to Arkadia, Scarpetta to Hakkasan, this is where you’ll come to dish out the big bucks - it’s oh so worth it. American Airlines Arena
Wynwood Walls
The Last Issue Ever
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Whether your watch collecting friend is always late or annoyingly on time, they’ll have the time of their life watching the day go by with this trinket from the Museum of Modern Art that only reveals the current time of the day. $110, momastore.org
THE TIMEPIECE COLLECTOR
THE STONER FRIEND Give your favorite stoner or dealer a gift they will truly enjoy: a MALIN + GOETZ Cannabis Scented Candle, which is sure to bring the long and lingering effects they desire. $52, bloomingdales.com.
For the guy who can tell the difference between tweed and chambray, the Banana Republic Knit Toggle Jacket is the ultimate Winter staple. It makes a statement and will keep him warm through those gruesomely cold Miami days. $120, bananarepublic.gap.com
THE GQ ADVOCATE
Whether you’re lighting menorahs or hanging ornaments on an artificial tree, face it: finals week always cuts into your holiday shopping. But don’t worry, you don’t have to stand in infinitely long lines at the same department stores or fight over who gets the last iPad Mini. Sit back with your laptop, relax and smell the hot chocolate because Distraction has you covered with a list of online gifts personalized for the 23 special people in your life.
We all have that friend who repeats lines from “Harry Potter” in their sleep. The Kymera Magic Wand Remote Control is the perfect gift for your fantasy-fiction obsessed friend. You’ll be able to control the TV like a wizard without even having to say wingardium leviosa. $69.99, amazon.com.
THE MUGGLE
words_alexandra solano. photo_vendor sites. design_sophianna bishop.
For your friend who is obsessed with chocolate, they will love the Collection Box Grand Crus Chocolates, which includes 66 tasting chocolate squares made with the best quality Valrhona chocolate. $45.99, valrhonachocolate.com.
THE CHOCOLATE LOVER
The hostess with the very mostess often seems to have a busier schedule than you, so help her look fabulous while doing it in 2013 with a personalized Erin Condren Life Planner. It comes complete with goals and to-do lists, laminated monthly tabs, colorful personalized stickers and so much more. Starting at $50, Erincondren.com.
MOM
Outfit your fashion forward friend with this J.Crew Printed Wool Scarf that is sure to bring a pop of color to any winter wardrobe. $59.50, jcrew.com
THE WANNABE MAN REPELLER
23 gifts to satisfy even the biggest Grinch
THE ULTIMATE HOLIDAY WRAP-UP
HIGH
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The Last Issue Ever
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We all love and remember Billy Corben’s “The U,” so the film man’s latest flick, “Broke,” will be the greatest addition to a sport freak’s documentary collection. Featuring some of our day’s top ballers, the film looks into the millions of dollars spent (often not wisely) in the industry. $4.99, iTunes.
SPORTS LOVER
BOY
day. $110, momastore.org
If you have a friend who loves to write, they will love the Seven Year Pen, which is designed to reduce waste by lasting seven whole years. You can choose from tons of designs and you’ll have plenty of ink for every draft. $7.50, seltzergoods.com.
21ST CENTURY MARK TWAIN
In college, he who wins beer pong wins all. And while granting the champion a medal may not be financially feasible (we’re just college students, after all), this Glow In The Dark Beer Pong Party Pack definitely is. $14.99, bewild.com.
THE BEER PONG CHAMP
For the guy who’s always by your side, return the favor with a spritz of Sex Panther Cologne Spray, officially licensed from “Anchorman.” $35, amazon.com.
Your iron-pumping friend will love the Contigo Kangaroo Water Bottle, which has a special side storage compartment for credit cards, IDs or other necessary wallet items that are difficult to carry around while training for a 5K. $12.99, gocontigo.com.
THE GYM RAT
If you have a friends-withbenefits relationship, the Karmasheetra Twister Game might be perfect for your pair. No explanation necessary. Approximately $32, karmasheetra.com.
THE SLAMPIECE
THE LOYAL WINGMAN
For the very special man in your life, give him a reason to feel manly with a DoIt-Yourself Microbrewery Kit. You’ll not only get to spend quality time with your pops trying to put it together, you’ll get a free drink out of it too. $42.95, thisiswhyimbroke.com.
STEP DAD
long and lingering effects they desire. $52, bloomingdales.com.
Every future Cane needs practice reading, so get them “All My Friends Are Dead,” a book that also teaches them valuable lessons about life’s predicaments. $9.95, amazon.com
THE GIFTED CHILD
For that friend who tweets their every thought, get them Tweetbook, a personalized book that compiles up to 200 of their tweets. It’s safe to say they will feel like a celebrity, even if they’re not verified... yet. Starting at $14.99, tweetbookz.com
GIRL
THE ROOMIE Assuming you like your roommate enough to give them a gift, invest in Stickygram, which personalizes your images into fridge-worthy custom magnets. That way everyone can see what perfect roomies you both are. $14.99 per sheet of 9, stickygram.com.
No one likes a screaming 12-pounder in a high chair, so get them the Mustachifier, a pacifier that makes the little tyke look like the Monopoly man. If he’s a boy, the gift will help him prepare for puberty. $12, amazon.com.
THE CRY BABY
For the friend who can’t go a day without a mupload, the Jelly Lens iPhone Filter will add special effects to their photos, from fisheye to kaleidoscope. Best of all, it’s also compatible with digital cameras and other smartphones, so no one feels left out. $10, fredflare.com.
THE PAPARAZZI PAL
Have your marriage obsessed friend say goodbye to Sports Illustrated hunks and “Cha-lla!” to nice Jewish boys every month with the 2013 Nice Jewish Guys Calendar. $14, fredflare.com.
THE MRS DEGREE SEEKER
Once your friend comes back from studying abroad all semester, they’ll really appreciate an XOHandworks Custom Map Pendant made out of vintage maps, atlases and dictionaries of any location in the world. $27.00, etsy. com/XO Handworks.
THE JETSETTER
If you have that friend who loves desserts, the Endless Edges Brownie Pan is ideal. Even if you don’t have a friend who loves desserts, everyone on your list will love this. $34.95, bakersedge.com.
THE SWEETART
chocolate squares made with the best quality Valrhona chocolate. $45.99, valrhonachocolate.com.
If your dad’s not a beer connoisseur, the complete National Geographic Collection (with every issue since 1888 on discs) is a serious bargain. $30.28, amazon. com.
DAD
THE FRIEND WITH A +60 KLOUT SCORE
LOW
The Basketball Diaries words_patrick riley. photo_raquel zaldivar. design_ivana cruz.
Last year, they had their first winning season in the ACC ever. This year, they received votes in the AP and USA Today preseason polls for the first time since the 2008 - 2009 season and were ranked number 24 by Blue Ribbon Yearbook. There’s no denying it: Miami’s basketball team is on the rise and few are more excited for this season than senior Julian Gamble. After being forced to watch from the sidelines last year due to an injury, the big man is back and ready to make up for lost time.
TUESD A OCT. 3 Y 0
MOND A OCT. 2 Y 9
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16 Distraction Sports
Athletic Training Room 1:55 p.m.
Practice I 3:35 p.m.
After waiting inside the athletic training room for a few minutes, Julian Gamble appears through a green door dressed entirely in black - a black Marlins hat, a black True Religion hoodie, black Jordan basketball shorts and shoes, black Nike socks and a black digital watch. We introduce ourselves and he sits down on a padded table. As he lifts ankle weights on his leg, he talks to other players about everything from “Assassin’s Creed III” to NBA players’ salaries. Every now and then he takes a break from entertaining the room by getting up and switching weights. He tore his ACL in a preseason workout during the summer of 2011, thus forcing him to sit out last season. “I was driving to the basket. I kind of planted and my leg just gave out,” he explains. The 6”10’ sixthyear senior didn’t think it was anything serious at first, but he would soon discover that he was in for a rude awakening. “I went and got the MRI and I spoke to the doctor and that’s when he showed me the MRI and showed me where my ACL was supposed to be and it wasn’t.” It took the North Carolina native six months to recover: “It’s tough, obviously, because you have to take it a day at a time. You want instant results and it never comes as fast as you want it to…I don’t think I felt healthy again until this previous summer.” I ask him what it was like to finally be his old self again and the answer surprises me. “I don’t think I ever really got back to my old self,” he says. “I was just a completely different person. I [am] a lot better than I was before and it [is] exciting to be that way, kind of be around my teammates and be able to run and play and jump like I hadn’t before.” His knee is back to normal and fortunately for him, the NCAA granted him a sixth year of eligibility. Today he is here because of all the little bumps and bruises that accumulate in practice. They call it “maintenance.”
Inside the Field House, Miami’s practice facility, coach Jim Larranga briefs the huddled team on today’s practice. The message is clear: “You got to develop the right attitude.” The huddle is then broken up with a “1-2-3-TOGETHER” as the players warm up with a passing drill, followed by some shooting and defensive drills. A tip drill is on the agenda, but Larranaga has something special in store - an innovative idea that only 28 years of head coaching experience can spawn. He arranges a number of green folding chairs near the sideline to mimic a bench area and equips the team with towels. They are instructed to cheer every time a tip goes in. And so the hooting, hollering and towel-waving begins. With every successful tip-in the players become more enthusiastic. They seem to thoroughly enjoy the fake cheering. Assistant coaches Eric Konkol and Chris Caputo can’t help but crack smiles. At one point during a scrimmage, Gamble scores on a left jump hook. Larranaga stands a few feet away from me, watching every move closely. He turns around to say: “One of the easiest games when you know what you’re good at.”
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FRIDAY NOV. 0 2
MOND A NOV. 0 Y 5
WEDNE SD NOV. 0 AY 7
The Game 6:14 p.m.
The Interview 2:39 p.m.
Practice II 3:39 p.m.
St. Leo Lions vs. Miami Hurricanes. The first and only exhibition game of the season is about to start. By 7:05 p.m., players are getting in position for tipoff. Miami’s Kadji shoots up and wins it, but before the Canes even realize what is happening they are down by 10. Miami slowly battles back as the band plays “Livin’ On A Prayer.” Seems fitting enough. It’s 12-13 now, advantage St. Leo. The Canes hang around as point guard Shane Larkin hits a three as time expires to make it 30-37. But even though the crowd breaks out in cheer, the players quietly shuffle off the court. They know they shouldn’t be down seven to a Division II team. The second half starts like the first one ended: sloppy, flat and fruitless. Eventually, Miami is able to chip away the deficit and McKinney Jones’ three ties it up at 56 apiece. At two minutes to 9 p.m., the score is 67-69 in favor of St. Leo. Miami has the ball with 35.5 seconds left in the game. After various misses the Canes get their own rebound, however, the ball goes out of bounds off of a Lions player soon after. There are three seconds left in the contest. The ball is inbounded and ends up in Kadji’s hands. He shoots…and misses.
Julian appears into the men’s team lounge, shoes in hand and jersey draped over his shoulder. He sits next to me in one of the black lounge chairs. “Let’s talk a bit about the game,” I begin. Even as the words leave my mouth, I can’t help but wonder how annoying it must be for players to be reminded of losses over and over again. “Although St. Leo is a Division II team they’re basketball players, too,” he says. “We can’t expect them to miss wide open shots and miss layups and miss dunks.” I can sense that the topic is exhausted. Time to shift gears. We talk about school (he’s a liberal arts major now pursuing his master’s degree) and the difficulty of balancing classes and basketball (“It can get a little hectic”). Our conversation then turns to life post-graduation. What are his plans? “Something near the game of basketball, because it’s the game that I love and I want to make a positive impact [on] people that come after me to make sure that they have the best chance to succeed.” His life motto? “‘Not taking things for granted. I’ve been through a lot and I’ve seen many different things and me traveling to Africa some years back with Athletes in Action, seeing what types of things went on over there and the amount of resources they have versus what we have here… [it’s] just, don’t take things for granted.” I ask him if he has noticed that players sometimes don’t listen to Coach L (something Larranaga briefly hinted at on Friday) and if he thinks that is a problem. “Coach L knows exactly what he’s talking about,” he says. “Every word he speaks when it comes to basketball and knowledge-wise is gold to me.” I quickly wrap up the interview and then get up to shake his hand. I feel like a hobbit standing next to him. He then exits and heads to a film session, followed by practice, which is then followed by class from 6:30 to 9:00 p.m. Say what you will about college athletes, but they definitely work for their scholarships.
As I enter the now familiar gym, the players just broke the huddle and now proceed to shoot casually in groups of two or three. Next on the agenda is a three-on-two drill, “White vs. Green.” Bodies starting hitting the floor as Rion Brown takes a charge. The intensity and pace pick up further. Bishop Daniels, who is finally back practicing with the team after a hamstring injury, drops down to do push-ups after he fouls Gamble in transition. No one called it. No one said anything. It’s just automatic. It’s understood. When Kenny doesn’t sprint hard enough in one of the drills, Larranaga calls him out: “That’s the problem in the game!” He’s got an edge to him today. Moments later, when Trey shoots after Larranaga has called the play dead, Coach L finally explodes. “What is wrong!?” The gym goes silent. You could hear the proverbial needle drop. But the outburst proves effective. The second play works a lot better. “Now that’s a fast break! Go get a drink!” Next up is a one-on-one defensive drill. Bigs vs. bigs. Guards vs. guards. Larranaga takes Rion aside to explain to him the intricacies of on-the-ball defense. That’s Coach L at his best – the teacher. As practice nears its end, I spot Gamble and Coach L sitting next to each other, talking. I remember what Julian told me about Larranaga just the other day. “He likes to slow things down and really teach the fundamentals in every aspect of the game. He wants the little things to be right.” Finally, around 5:42 the clapping begins. A circle of players and coaches forms and Coach L states: “Now that was a good practice...We got a game on Friday. We need another practice tomorrow like we had today.” He then tells his team that he’d like to go to lunch or dinner with them this week. “I’ll text you guys,” he says. It is now 5:48 p.m. The season starts in less than 48 hours.
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THE MOST DANGEROUS GAME IN THE WORLD
words_robert pursell. photo_nicholas rodriguez. design_nan gallagher. Sitting down on a wooden folding chair in a back office of the Casino Miami Jai Alai, just a few miles away from Miami Airport, Eric Irastorze cuts an impressive figure. He is a world champion athlete, widely considered the best among his trade and at 6’4”, 220 pounds with a chin that could cut granite and dark, wavy hair, the 36-year-old French native has the looks of a movie star. In another time and place, he might have been a celebrity. So why isn’t he famous? Because Irastorze plays Jai Alai, a little known sport that once held considerable notoriety in South Florida, but that has since seen its popularity fade. Jai Alai games in Miami used to draw thousands of spectators in the ‘70s and ‘80s. Jai Alai courts (called frontons) spread all across the nation, most notably in Florida, Connecticut and Rhode Island, where thousands of people piled into matches to partake in the exciting pace and widespread betting aspect of the sport. Casino Miami Jai Alai was considered the Yankee Stadium of the sport, attracting the best competition and players. And while Miami Jai Alai still hosts the best players in the world, games now attract thinner crowds, many of which are liver-spotted geriatrics who anxiously place bets in the casino lobby, often lacking the energy to actually shuffle into the fronton playing area. “Obviously I hope more people down here will get into the sport,” Irastorze said. “But I’m going to keep playing regardless. I love the game, it’s magical. If people would come out and watch it, I know they would fall in love with it.” After spending one afternoon watching it, it’s easy to see how one could fall in love with the sport. Tracing its origins back hundreds of years ago to the Basque Country of Spain, Jai Alai has been billed as the fastest sport in the world. If you mixed racquetball (what your unathletic father plays with his office buddies) with the mind of a madman and a healthy dosage of steroids, you’d get jai alai. It’s played on a fronton roughly half the size of a football field and consists of three walls (front, back and left). The ball (called pelota) is made of goatskin and rubber and is caught and thrown by the players using hook-shaped wicker baskets (called a cesta) that cover each player’s right hand. The games are played with teams of two and end at seven points. Scoring occurs when one team fails to field the ball before it bounces twice, or fails to catch it cleanly. And while whoever came up with the PR slogan of “Fastest sport in the world because of the balls” should probably
18 Distraction Sports
WARP SPEED. One of the fastest sports in the world, an average throw of a jai alai pelota travels at 150 miles an hour. The sport originated in Spain and frontons in Miami were world famous in past decades, but now the sport is mostly enjoyed by devotees. be fired, the title couldn’t be more fitting. The game truly is fast. Like really, mind-numbingly fast. Consider this, the fastest ever recorded Jai Alai pelota was traveling at 188 miles an hour. Most throws average around 150 miles an hour, and given the fact that the pelota is about as soft as a rock, perhaps the PR slogan should read: “The most ridiculously dangerous sport you’ve never heard of because the balls are essentially large bullets.” We cringe when somebody gets hit with a fastball in baseball. Getting hit with a Jai Alai pelota conjures the same experience, only ten thousand times harder. “I’ve seen some incredible injuries during my time playing,” said Juan ‘Arra’ Arrasate, the manager of players at Miami Jai Alai, and a former 20-year pro. “If you get hit with the pelota, you are going to break some bones. I was lucky to never get injured, but I remember this one guy who got hit in the patella by the pelota and his patella shattered into about 20 pieces.” After saying this he paused to look up at the television set in his office broadcasting the Jai Alai being played at the casino. His eyes flashed as he watched a player scale the left wall of the fronton to stop a pelota no less than six feet above his head from speeding past. “But just look at how beautiful that is. How could someone not love it?”
READY?
IF YOU GO
Miami Jai Alai is still the preeminent fronton in the world and one of only two frontons in the U.S. that operates year-round. The biggest draw to the games is the betting aspect with betters being able to combine picks for winning players and teams to reap large benefits. Since all balls and cestas need to be handmade, it is astronomically expensive to play. Each cesta costs around $500 to $600 and lasts roughly three weeks, while each pelota costs between $100 to $200 and only lasts for about 20 minutes of play. Worldwide participation is low with only an estimated 500 people playing and about 100 playing professionally. American Amateur Jai Alai, 1935 NE 150 St., Miami, 786-389-2123; americanjaialai.com
WHERE ARE THEY NOW? More than two decades ago wide receiver Randal “Thrill” Hill played at UM where he was part of two national championship winning teams (1987, 1989) and countless memorable moments. You might recall him rocking the suspenders in Billy Corben’s “30 for 30” documentary or firing off imaginary pistols to celebrate a touchdown in the 1991 Cotton Bowl. Distraction was able to catch up with the former Cane. words_juan pellerano. photo_courtesy of randall hill. design_nan gallagher.
RH: Definitely our win in the 1989 Sugar Bowl vs. Alabama. After that game we were named the undisputed National Champions. It was my first year starting as wide receiver. I’ll never forget that season. D: What drew you to do the now famous touchdown celebration in the 1991 Cotton Bowl? RH: Nothing was planned, it was just part of the emotional rollercoaster, part of the game. My adrenaline was pumping and I just decided to do it at that second. I didn’t think about it beforehand. D: Who was your favorite teammate? RH: There was so much camaraderie on those teams. It wasn’t about one guy, we were all very close. D: How did the team handle all the media attention? RH: It didn’t matter what they were saying on the outside, we were always just focused on the team and being the best.
FLYING HIGH. Hill played wide receiver for the Phoenix Cardinals (later Arizona Cardinals) from 1991 to 1994. The former Cane caught 14 touchdowns and recorded 3,849 yards receiving during his seven years in the NFL.
Distraction: Looking back, what separated UM’s team from others? RH: Everyone assumes it was talent, but it was a desire within us to not accept being second best. We were a driven group of individuals who were focused on doing what is best not for ourselves, but for the team. D: Why did you choose to play football at UM? RH: My family wanted me to stay close to home, on top of the national recognition UM had gained in football. Also, UM had one of the highest graduation rates of all the top football schools. ON THE DEFENSE. Today Hill works for Homeland Security as a federal agent. Before joining the Department of Homeland Security in 2003, the Miami native worked as a police officer and deputy sheriff.
D: Where did the nickname “Thrill” Hill come from? RH: I first got that nickname in high school. After one of my big games, the South Dade News Leader gave me the nickname Randal “Thrill” Hill and it stuck. D: What’s your fondest memory?
D: Do you think “The U” documentary accurately portrayed the teams of the ‘80s and early ‘90s? RH: I thought it was very well done and pretty accurate. The only thing I would have added was that we also nationally had one of the highest graduation rates for top-tier, Division I schools. D: Were you excited to be drafted by your hometown Miami Dolphins coming out of college? RH: It didn’t really matter because the important part was that I made it to the NFL and I was a first round draft pick. Beyond that it didn’t matter to me where I went. D: How did you handle being traded one game into your professional career to the then-Phoenix Cardinals? RH: It didn’t affect me at all. The NFL is a business. D: In what ways is the NFL different from college football? RH: College is more of a learning experience and there is more camaraderie amongst teammates. [The] NFL is simply a business. D: How did you end up working for homeland security? RH: I always wanted to be involved in civil law enforcement. I became a special agent criminal investigator. That was always one of my goals. D: What must UM do to once again dominate in football? RH: To recruit individuals who don’t necessarily have the greatest talent but come in with the right attitude and don’t want to settle for second best. Guys who know how to win and are willing to put the work in to succeed. The Last Issue Ever
Distraction 19
FOR THE
OF THE
GAME
THE SPORTS WATCHING EXPERIENCE GOES LUXE
words and design_sophianna bishop.
Everyone remembers their first time. It may have been showing up on the Jumbotron of a Yankees game with your dad when you were seven. It may have been “watching” a Heat game with your boyfriend as you sat in the 12th row, unable to see sh*t because the guy in front of you happened to be 6’3”. Perhaps it was freezing your butt off at a Packers game as you wore your cheesehead proudly in negative 20-degree weather. Today’s first-time stadium experiences, however, probably include sippin’ Grey Goose screwdrivers while listening to Tiësto spin as the Dolphins play...in the background. Welcome to the life of a Miami sports fan. There are now three nightclub-like VIP lounges that high-rolling Miamians can flock to while cheering on their teams: LIV at SunLife Stadium, The Clevelander at Marlins Park and the recently-opened Hyde Lounge at the American Airlines Arena. Is this an evolution of the relationship between sports and entertainment, or just another excuse for Miami’s party scene to maximize its profits? At LIV at SunLife Stadium, which is modeled after its sister nightclub at the Fontainebleau, individual tickets start at $275, and that’s just for admission. Meanwhile, for a minimal $15,000 fee, you can get the full Dolphin’s experience at SunLife, which includes a 15-person cabana complete with an orange carpet entry near the players’ entrance, valet parking, Dom Pérignon Magnum, a bottle of premium liquor and beer. On top of having a great view, an inflated ego and pretty girls surrounding your table, the package comes with a cocktail waitress who will never let you see the bottom of your glass, as well as a fantasy football concierge so you may receive the best advice when managing your lineup.
VTRIEAPTMENT
GET
E
FROM
HOM
THE FLORIDIAN
THE ULTIMATE
RUMRUNNER
LIGHT RUM 1 oz. DARK RUM 1 oz. BLACKBERRY BRANDY BANANA LIQUER 1 oz. GRENADINE 0.5 oz.
Multiple celebrities have made an appearance to “support” the Dolphins, including Ryan Lochte, Kim Kardashian, Dwayne Wade, LeBron James, Kid Rock and Lil Wayne. Aside from having two 450-gallon aquariums behind home plate, Marlins Stadium has its own club, the Clevelander, which features an indoor pool. This makes it the second MLB stadium to afford its visitors such a unique experience and with a starting price of only $50, the Clevelander’s limited VIP section is a bargain compared to its counterpart at SunLife. With your Rum Runner in one hand and the twins you’ve been chatting up for five innings in the other, the Marlins’ abysmal performance won’t matter. Then there’s Hyde Lounge at the American Airlines arena, which is an extension of the SLS hotel’s lounge on Collins Avenue. The lounge is limited to only 200 people and admission is complimentary for courtside ticket holders. Miami has always been known for having bandwagon fans, but is it really necessary to watch a Marlins game in a bikini? Or watch Reggie Bush score a touchdown as you get wasted off Dom? Maybe that’s the direction in which the sports industry is going because hot dogs and nachos don’t seem to do the trick anymore. Maybe cheering wholeheartedly for your team, screaming ‘til you lose your voice or bickering with the opposing team’s fans are things of the past. All we know for sure is that the drinks will continue to flow and celebrities will keep throwing money around, while real fans stand in the bleachers with hot dogs in hand as they lose their voices, not from drinking too much, but from pouring their hearts out for the love of the game.
SCREWDRIVER 1 oz.
ORANGE JUICE VODKA 1 oz. +2 ICE CUBES
3 oz.
The Last Issue Ever
Distraction 20
HAVE UNTIL A U O
UST 1, 2013 T UG
E SHIPPING! Y E R
gr AUG. 1ST ad 2013 sen uat ior ing s! IGN UP FOR F OS
IBIS yearbook
YOUR NAME HERE Sign up to get YOUR yearbook Mailed directly to YOU FOR FREE! Go online to www.ibisyearbook.com and click on: ‘Get My Senior Yearbook’ to enter your name and address into our free graduated senior mailing list
DO N’T
attention: seniors graduating in
december can still take portraits in
february
FOR GET
TO AP MA P KE FOR O AN YO I UR NT SEN IOR ME * IB PRO NT ISY TR EAR A
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The Political Issue
Distraction
1
On Annabel: Dress, RP4LF. LF Stores. Corset, Free People. freepeople.com. Jewelry, Model’s Own. style_ ana calderone. fashion assistant_gabrielle mottaz. photo_kelly smith. photo assistant_kacie nelson. models_annabel schwartz and nicole ogaard. hair_ashley greenstein. makeup_jackie gallo. props_mi vintage, 786-260-4012, borrowmivinateg@live.com. design_ana calderone and megan mccrink.
22 Distraction Fashion In the Margins
State of
Solitude Dark, bold and ominous, we explore the perfect fashion for your last day on earth.
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Distraction 23
On Nicole: Dress, Love. LF Stores. Ring, Amorium Handmade Jewelry. amoriumjewelry.com.
24 Distraction Fashion In the Margins
On Annabel: Top, Lovemar. LF Stores. Jacket, Blush. Blush Boutique. Briefs, DKNY. dkny.com. Jewelry, Model’s Own. Shoes, Sam Edelman.
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Distraction 25
On Annabel: Leotard, Rehab. Blush Boutique. Jewelry, Amorium Handmade Jewelry. amoriumjewelry.com. Shoes, Jeffrey Campbell.
26 Distraction Fashion In the Margins
On Nicole: Top, Brand. LF Stores. Skirt, Splendid. Blush Boutique. Necklace, Vintage. Stylist’s Own. Cuff, Amorium Handmade Jewelry. amoriumjewelry.com. Ring, Model’s Own. Shoes, Sam Edleman. The Last Issue Ever
Distraction 27
On Nicole: Dress, Lush. LF Stores. Necklace, Amorium Handmade Jewelry. amoriumjewelry.com. Headpiece, Amorium Handmade Jewelry. amoriumjewelry.com.
28 Distraction Fashion In the Margins
The Grunge Movement words_adam tomashek. design_ana calderone.
Throw on your distressed denim, vintage band T-shirts, an aged leather jacket, combat boots, loads of skull bracelets, cross rings – oh, and studs. The look? Grunge glam. And it has everyone all hot and bothered. A quick history lesson: the credit for the grunge-is-chic movement goes to our favorite twin duo, Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen. With their high-end label, The Row, and multiple smaller lines for Wal-Mart, J.C. Penny and StyleMint, no one can argue that their killer hippie-biker-blazer-boho styles aren’t something to gawk at. It’s also very true that the ‘Golden Age’ of modeling was in the very middle of all this busywork. It was the age of supermodels like Cindy Crawford, Naomi Campbell, Linda Evangelista and Tyra Banks that graced the advertising world, not teenybopper burnouts like we have nowadays. Their ‘anti-fashion’ movement with messy hair, heavy bling and shredded leggings gave way to a whole culture based upon a colorful blend of idealism and cynicism. Now let’s all not forget that the grunge movement would amount to nothing if it didn’t have rebellion and sex appeal written all over it. What’s more seductive than a frayed and tattered pair of jeans, a Britpop T-shirt and a
the shirt
boho-studded cross-body satchel? Exactly. The revival of flannel and the iconic Doc Martin’s is central to the young grunge look. With the advent of street style blogs and DIY fashion (peep our tips on DIY studs to the right), there has been a reawakening of an unrestrained youth culture with no limitations when it comes to courageous and introspective personal style. Grunge-sexy celebs like Kate Moss and Miley Cyrus influenced a lucrative clothing market based on it this past year in stores like LF and Free People that take pride in providing alternative unique products for young adults. As for other fashion world gurus, perhaps no other designer knew the art of looking edgy than Alexander McQueen, but some have gotten pretty darn close. Rodarte has their dark witch aesthetic, Proenza Schouler has their youthfully shiny leather and DSquared2 (especially this Spring/Summer ‘13) has a complete ‘90s revamp with motorcycle jackets and super leggy silhouettes. And as for jewelry, Pamela Love takes the crown for her deathlyscientific-geologic-Aztec designs that radiate the definition of the grunge appeal (I mean have you seen her eagle claw cuff?). With the ante significantly upped, the grunge revival is nothing without stellar confidence underneath the frayed denim vests. The best grunge looks are those created entirely personally. Rock a wear-with-anything flannel, clash styles and turn heads.
the jewelry
DANNIJO “Spilk II” $120, dannijo.com
D.I.Y
STUDS
words_nina anakar. Let’s be honest, studs aren’t exactly a timeless trend. So why not save the $100 you were going to spend on those shorts from LF and spruce up a pair of your own? WHERE TO BUY Studsandspikes.com has an array of colors, shapes and sizes. Pyramid studs are best for clothing. WHAT TO STUD Jean shorts, Converse and Jansport Backpacks. Basically anything canvas or denim. HOW TO STUD You’ll need tweezers or pliers. The studs come with straight backs, so they’re easy to poke through. Start along a hem and follow the line. You’ll want to stick with a linear design. Once they’re through the fabric fold each backing over with the tool of your choice. Be sure that the studs have a solid grip on the fabric and you’re done.
DANNIJO “Paolo” $259, dannijo.com
the scarves
Brandy Melville “Angie Skull Top” $29, brandymelvilleusa.comcom
Love Quotes “Meditation” $88, chictweak.com
Tolani “African Infinity” $90, chictweak.com
Photos courtesy of Alison Brod PR, DANNIJO, Brandy Melville USA
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Distraction 29
T H E FINAL COUNT DOWN 12
21
2012
words_alexandra solano. illustration_serbani ghosh. photo and design_sophianna bishop.
30 Distraction In the Margins
T N
YOU’RE ON YOUR WAY TO A HOLIDAY PARTY or are in the middle of an afternoon nap that has slowly become a staple of your winter break days. It may never cross your mind that on this lazy day, the sun will align with the center of the Milky Way galaxy and we’ll all be doomed to die. Oh, and this only happens once every 26,000 years. The name for this phenomenon is called GALACTIC ALIGNMENT and it was predicted by the MAYAN CIVILIZATION, which were basically a group of really smart people—astronomers, mathematicians, and scientists. They were so advanced that they could predict the movement of stars and planets, without the use of any sort of telescope. In fact, they were able to calculate all eclipses, equinoxes and solstices for the last 5,000 years WITHOUT ERROR. And they chose DECEMBER 21, 2012 to END their calendar.
E D S ’ IT
R E B CEM
. 2 1 0 2 , 1 2 The Last Issue Ever
Distraction 31
Q
n dar o
en ir cal e h t ed , end y c a r ? ccu eir a ow it h n t k r e n fo sw now life a k , f e o l op nd of pe hat the e p u t ro if a g ber 21, is m Dece
E H T S ERE’
SO H
N O I L L MI
R A L L DO
: N O I UEST
Well, with the recent climate shifts, species extinctions, tsunamis, repeated hurricanes, and other crazy incidences going on in the universe, we are left to wonder if an upcoming end of the world is really such a far-fetched idea. Perhaps all these incidences and natural disasters are red flags suggesting an impending doom predicted not only by the Mayans, but also by several other prophecies resounded by the I-Ching, Web-bot, Hopi Indians, Nostradamus, religious groups and even astronomers and scientists. Though none of their theories are completely foolproof, we cannot deny that something extraordinary is in the works. But what is it? And will we surpass it?
T
he year is 3,114 B.C. Inhabiting Central America in countries such as Guatemala, El Salvador, and Mexico, were the Mayans, one of the most advanced civilizations known to date. Along with mathematical advances, they improved the Mesoamerican calendar with the Calendar Round, used to span a generation, or a person’s lifetime. But this system only documented approximately 52 years. So what if the Mayans wanted to chronicle an event past 52 years? That’s when they created the Long Count, a linear calendar that kept time in units of 20. The way the calendar worked was as follows: 20 days made a unial; 18 unials made a tun; 20 tuns made a k’atun; and 20 k’atuns made up a b’ak’tun. All in all, the Mayans spoke of eras of 5,125.40 years each equaling 13 b’ak’tuns of 144,000 days each. The Great Cycle of 13 b’ak’tuns (the end of their Long Count calendar) is said to end at 11:11 Universal Time December 21, 2012, which is coming up rather soon-ish. Suddenly, we’re all concerned about this calendar, maybe not just because the end date is around the corner, but also because we’re starting to see that the date doesn’t just align itself with Mayan prophecies, but with those of many other ancient cultures, religions and beliefs. Let’s start with the Egyptians. Chapter 17 of the Book of the Dead, a text that was supposed to prepare Egyptians for the afterlife, describes a global catastrophe, kind of like an apocalypse. Except this apocalypse was supposed to have happened thousands of years before Egypt rose as a civilization. Researchers have hypothesized that this event occurred when Venus made a specific looping-motion through Orion’s belt in 9,782 B.C. And, apparently, the next time this looping will occur is estimated to be—you guessed it: 2012—the date of the next catastrophe. And if that’s not enough to get you thinking, researchers have also deciphered one repeating phrase in this book, which states, “After the destruction…the old lion turned around.” If the phrase had to do with the apocalypse, which it so totally does, researchers think it could be referring to the earth experiencing a cataclysmic reversal of its rotation, which basically happens when the poles shift and the earth’s crust become displaced. All of which could mean very bad things for us. Good-bye human race—and the not-so-human race, too.
32 Distraction In the Margins
Though the Egyptians lived long ago, their prophecies don’t seem too farfetched. Especially when there’s an existing Native American tribe called the Hopi Indians that affirms a similar apocalypse. They live on the Hopi Reservation in northeastern Arizona and have prophesied that the end of times would occur when the earth would be crossed by iron snakes and stone rivers (railroads, anyone?), when the land would be crossed by a giant spider’s web (freeways perhaps?), and the seas would turn black (BP oil spills?). Not freaked out yet? Well, their prophecies talk about us being in a fourth world that will cease to exist…and the Mayan calendar ends at the close of a fourth b’ak’tun cycle. Coincidence? Maybe. But the Hopi Indians are a bit more hopeful. As the fourth world ends, the Pahana or True White Brother will return to plant seeds of wisdom and welcome the Fifth world. Though there isn’t a precise date attached to these predictions, all nine signs have been fulfilled, signaling that the end of the Fourth world, will indeed soon occur. And, according to some Hopi, probably in 2012. So if the Mayans, Egyptians and Hopi Indians are all saying the same thing, is December 21, 2012 really doomsday? Isn’t there some sort of advanced technology that could calculate exactly when the end of the world is really supposed to occur if we ask it to? Well, that’s exactly what the creators of the Web-bot believed. The Web Bot was an Internet Bot computer program that people claimed could predict future events by tracking keywords on the Internet, kind of like what Google does now. Except it was the 1990s and people were willing to surrender to any device that could predict stock market trends and do simple math. Even so, the Web Bot still claimed to predict many events, including the September 11 attacks, the Space Shuttle Columbia disaster and Hurricane Katrina. Skeptics claim, however, that though the bot may be accurate, the future of the world, according to the bot, always seemed dreary and bleak. Many also argued that its predictions were too vague and relied solely on group knowledge easily available through any search database on the Internet. In essence, if someone had been blogging about the worsening hurricane season, for example, the Web-bot would collect that information, along with other articles and blogs on the Internet, and then predict that the hurricane season was going to worsen. It’s as if the Web-bot was a more sophisticated version of trending topics on Twitter.
N:
n
The most important prediction that the Web-bot made, however, was that small nuclear wars were supposed to occur around 2009, which would later result in a major apocalypse scheduled for 2012. We have yet to have seen those nuclear wars, though. But then there’s the I-Ching, also known as the Classic of Changes, one of the oldest Chinese classic texts. People would ask the book a question and a certified Chinese Madame Cleo flipped three coins in the air and drew a hexagram based on the results. But this book had nothing to do with the end of the world until a guy named Terence McKenna made a graph by matching the levels of the I-Ching’s patterns with key periods in history. He matched high and low points on his graph with significant events in time. But then he noticed that there was a point where the level of novelty within the peaks reached its maximum, and all the next patterns were totally unique. And if that wasn’t enough, before those new patterns, there was an irregular movement of the line where it dipped off the chart, perhaps signaling that the end of time matched to a specific date: December 21, 2012. It is important to note, however, that though this graph did suggest important events such as the fall of the Roman Empire and World Wars I and II, McKenna invented this timeline and he could not even figure out what was supposed to happen on that predicted doomsday. If we are going to consider the value of man-made predictions, we have to acknowledge the prophecies of a man most closely related with Mayan 2012 predictions, Nostradamus. To date, he’s predicted the French Revolution, the atom bomb, the rise of Adolf Hitler, and even the September 11 attacks. So perhaps he has some credibility. One of his more important images is that of an eight-spoked wheel, which refers to the alignment of two crosses: the Divine Cross made up of our galactic center and the celestial equator and the Terrestrial Cross, which has the angles that make up our equinox and solstice. Well, according to Nostradamus, the two crosses only align once every 13,000 years. Can you guess when the next alignment is supposed to occur? That’s right, 2012.
B
ut as with everything else, skeptics believe his predictions were often very vague being that he poeticized his words in quatrains that could be interpreted in different ways. He also never makes any direct reference to the year 2012. But if these prophecies seem so discredited, why does almost every single religion also touch upon the possibility of some kind of end of the world? In Christianity, there’s the Book of Revelation, which mentions Armageddon, or the name for the final battle on Earth between God and Satan. Similarly, in Islam, the end of the world, dubbed the Hour, involves Jesus returning to Damascus to slay an anti-Christ to renew harmony. In Judaism, though there isn’t a direct reference to the end of the world, there are events that can be compared with Armageddon, such as the Day of the Lord, in which God causes death to the non-believers. In Hinduism, Vishnu comes back in the last cycle of time as a figure called Kulki who rides a white horse and destroys evil but the planet is restored rather than destroyed. So if most religions, ancient civilizations, and prophets talk about some sort of 2012 apocalypse, can we completely discard the possibility? What about the science behind it all? From NASA’s perspective, they are not convinced by the hogwash surrounding the supposed end of the world. In an interview on the 2012 apocalypse phenomenon on their website, nasa.gov, they assert, “Nothing bad will happen to Earth in 2012. Our planet has been getting along just fine for more than four billion years and credible scientists worldwide know of no threat associated with 2012.” Even more, NASA rejects the interpretations of the Mayan calendar saying that “just as the calendar you have on your kitchen wall does not cease to exist after December 31, the Mayan calendar does not cease to exist December, 21, 2012.” As for the galactic alignment phenomena, they claim that each December the Earth and the sun align at the center of the Milky Way, but it is “an annual event with no consequence.” And what about the polar shift theory? NASA claims a reversal in the rotation of Earth is impossible, but that even if it were possible, it wouldn’t cause harm to life on Earth. However, when it comes to the dan-
gers of being hit by a meteor, NASA does affirm that our planet is subject (as it has always been) to impacts by comets and asteroids, but the hits are rare and nothing is scheduled for 2012 as far as they can tell. So if NASA completely debunks the 2012 apocalyptic theories, why did so many advanced ancient civilizations suggest that the year would be important? What if, by some strange twist of fate, the Maya, the Egyptians, the Hopi Indians, Web-bot, I-Ching, Nostradamus, and the predominant religions that speak about the impending apocalypse are in fact right? That’s the perspective many people have decided to take and we can see that in groups like the Institute of Human Continuity, whose mission is to ensure the survival of the human race beyond 2012. Using their own researchers, they set out to prove that the 2012 apocalypse is happening. To prepare, they’ve been working on missions to save the world with initiatives such as one called “Destination and Colonization” that focuses on getting humans to move to outer space in case we can’t live on Earth anymore. And if that’s not crazy enough, the group even has an online lottery system that you can enter to ensure an equal chance of survival beyond 2012. How they will draw these names from the lottery once the world is falling apart, I’m not really sure. Nor am I aware of how you’ll ever find out if your name was drawn from this lottery (you know, in the event you’re hiding under a rock or something trying not to die). There’s also a website that guarantees you a spot in the USS Ark 2012 escape ship, which will provide safe passage to another planet in the event of the apocalypse. If you want to reserve your seat, check out escapeearth2012.com. Boarding passes go for $24.49, and includes an intergalactic Passport ID Card to make it through “space customs.” No, this isn’t a joke. Then there are TV shows and movies that give us full depictions of what a 2012 apocalypse should look like: burning buildings, tidal waves and volcanic eruptions. Cue John Cusack and the movie, “2012.” Even on credible TV sources such as the National Geographic channel, we are starting to see shows like “Doomsday Preppers” that follow survivalists who prepare for the end of civilization. Needless to say, the preppers seem like extremists, but even then, you are drawn into their radicalism and start to think that, perhaps, you should also start building your own underground bunker. And if that’s not enough, since the early 1950s, Hollywood has been purging our brains with movies about the apocalypse. According to them, we could either be taken over by aliens from another planet (“Battle: Los Angeles”), by a fatal disease outbreak (“Resident Evil”), by apes that have evolved human traits (“Planet of the Apes”), by flesh-eating zombies (“Zombieland”) and other varied scenarios.
S
o with so much hype about the end times, what are we supposed to believe? Science, particularly NASA, tells us there’s no possibility of such an apocalypse. But then again, ancient civilizations like the Mayans and Egyptians were able to predict phenomena that modern science, until very recently, could not. Perhaps if we don’t pay attention to history and the prophecies of ancient cultures, we might miss a chance to avoid such a catastrophe. But then again, if we pay too much attention to history, we could miss out on blatantly contradictory scientific facts. Science writer Brian Dunning, host and producer of the podcast “Skeptoid,” weighs in on this idea. “Many people tend to place more trust in ancient Neolithic traditions than in the observations of modern science,” Dunning said. “There’s nothing wrong with studying and respecting our predecessors’ history for what it was, but when you turn things over and start believing that scientific knowledge of the natural world has only decreased over time, you’re not doing anyone any favors.” Truth is, there isn’t a single apocalyptic theory that is completely foolproof, but there are several worth considering. Whether we’re preparing for the end of the world or taking modern science for what its worth, maybe we should take this threat to our future as motivation to make the rest of 2012 the best year it has been yet. After all, it may be our last.
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A Helping Hand words_christian smith. photo_karli evans, kelly smith and raquel zaldivar. design_ivana cruz.
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With near death experiences and eye-opening journeys behind them, these three students have seen the face of adversity. They’ve visited remote third-world countries, where food and water are scarce, and have escaped a nearly fatal accident. And although at times they may have felt hopeless, they’re now working to leave a lasting impact on generations to come.
Eliza Gresh It’s five o’clock in the morning. Ambulance sirens sound as the EMT rushes to Jackson Memorial Hospital. On board, there’s a UM student found by a cab driver on the side of US-1. She was hit by a car while crossing the street. Her night is coming to an end as she slowly slips into unconsciousness. 10 days later, sophomore Eliza Gresh woke up from her coma with no recollection of that night. She knew she was in a lot of pain and that she was in a strange room, but she had no idea why. “I was supposed to be dead,” Gresh said. “If I wasn’t dead, they in no way believed that I would be able to talk, to think. I’m just lucky to be able to live.” Gresh sustained a fractured skull, a subdural and epidural hematoma and a bruised lung among a very long list of injuries. She was lucky to be alive, but not out of the clear. Doctors prepared her parents for the tough road ahead by educating them on coping with permanent brain damage, which the doctors suspected Gresh sustained.
The recovery process was in no way easy. Gresh had to undergo numerous surgical procedures throughout the summer. She couldn’t walk and relied on family to do just about anything. While this process was quite difficult for her, she didn’t let it get her down. Instead, she used the accident and her recovery to discover a new take on life. “It made me look at myself differently,” Gresh explained. “Now I want to help people out a lot more. I’ve got a really cool story that by telling I hope can make an impact.” Gresh, who fully recovered, wants to use her story to help save lives. She wants people, especially other college students, to understand the dangers of drunk and careless driving. “I hope people can realize that this stuff happens and although you might think you can drive drunk or text and drive, mistakes can happen,” Gresh warned. “After going through a huge trauma, let it have an impact on yourself...just don’t let it run your life. Gresh, a business law and psychology major, decided she is going to join the Peace Corps after graduating college: “You’ve got to find the things you want to do and get them done.” The Last Issue Ever
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Marcus Lara Marcus Lara always knew that he wanted to do something to help people, but he never quite knew how. Inspired by TOMS shoes, which provides a pair of shoes to underprivileged children for each one sold, Lara and his friend Parth Patel decided over lunch one day that they also wanted to start an organization that provides aid and relief to less fortunate children. They saw a market on campus for stylish and iconic backpacks, and so the idea for KIDDS was born. KIDDS is a non-profit that sells backpacks for $50 each to raise funds that give children in third world countries water, shelter, food and education. For every 42 backpacks sold, KIDDS sponsors a child for every year that he or she is in school or training. “Our parents spent their childhood in third world countries and grew up to be successful,” Lara explains. “Parth and I want every child to have that same opportunity that our parents did.” Since their launch in August of 2012, KIDDS has raised over $1,500 in backpack sales. They work through the organization SOS Children’s Villages, which has an established network of villages around the world, to distribute the money they raise. The money raised so far will go to support children in villages in Peru and Guatemala. As of now, there is only one style of backpack, with three interior color variations. Lara says that the plan is to expand the types of backpacks within the next year and eventually branch out into luggage and other carrying devices such as laptop cases. Five years from now, Lara hopes to have expanded the number of villages to 25. This expansion would include communities in Africa, Asia and even here in the United States. He sees KIDDS making an impact on a global scale, but not just through the funds raised by backpack sales. “We don’t only want to grow our company,” Lara said. “We also want to spread the message that there is still hope for these children.” As KIDDS continues to get off the ground, they hope to expand it within the UM community through the creation of an on-campus club. This way, the KIDDS name and message will reach even more people. Lara is excited about what’s in store for the future and can’t wait to see “how many KIDDS we can put on our backs.” HELPING KIDDS. Marcus Lara and Parth Patel have raised over $1,500 in backpack sales for children without food, water and basic needs.
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MISSION H20. Through BLUE Missions, Michael Barroso has helped raise over $25,000, which help bring clean water to underprivileged children in the Dominican Republic.
michael barroso At the age of 16, UM junior Michael Barroso went on his first trip to the Dominican Republic to bring clean water to rural villages. He quickly became hooked on helping others. Along with his friend Danny Rodriguez, he saw a need for these trips and soon after, Rodriguez created BLUE Missions, which stands for Building Love Uniting Everyone, to expand the reach of these projects. Five years and five trips later, Barroso now works on the Board of Directors and is the event coordinator for BLUE Missions. In the past three years, BLUE Missions has organized three water trips to the Dominican Republic, where volunteers build gravity-driven aqueducts over an 11-day period. These aqueducts help bring otherwise inaccessible clean water to people in the town. Barroso’s work has already brought clean drinking water to six towns in the Dominican Republic and has the potential to do the same all over the world. With costs starting at $15,000, these projects are not cheap. Each year, BLUE Missions
hosts events to raise funds and awareness such as “I’ll Drink To That,” which happens once a month at local bars where a portion of the proceeds that night benefit the non-profit. But the big money comes from BLUE Mission’s main fundraiser. According to Barroso, last year’s event brought in almost $25,000. With growing funds and growing recognition, BLUE Missions is preparing to expand its reach. Rather than just supporting one water project this summer, as they have in the past, BLUE is looking to expand to at least six. This means that at least 120 volunteers will be able to help out as opposed to just 20. This growth, according to Barroso, is just the first step in building what he hopes to be a world-recognized organization. “We want to have BLUE be not just a local non-profit, but have it be something where everyone knows the brand,” Barroso said. “When you think of the water crisis and how to get involved, BLUE should be what you think of.” When Barroso isn’t spending his time
organizing projects and fundraisers for BLUE, the music business and entertainment industry major runs Entertainment Avenue, a music entertainment company he started that subcontracts entertainment services to events. Barroso’s true passion, however, is the work he does with BLUE. He can’t picture his future without it. After he graduates, the music business and entertainment industry major plans to work with BLUE and at Entertainment Avenue, the company he started that subcontracts entertainment services to events, full time. “I’ve been doing this since I was 16 years old and I want to dedicate the rest of my life to serving these people,” Barroso said.
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FILTHY FLESH words_nicole vila. photo_karli evans. design_ivana cruz.
When it comes to food, it seems as though the American thing to do is eat meat. Lots of meat. We go to the store and buy packs of meat in bulk. We drive through restaurants and buy buckets of meat from a window. We eat red meat, white meat, dark meat. Meat that comes from an animal on two legs or four legs. In this day and age, meat is about the only thing we truly do not discriminate against. We’re fans of it all, but where is it coming from?
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With respect to meat, the marathon of all races is approaching: the Holidays. We have Thanksgiving, when we honor a nearly 400-year-old tradition by watching football, giving thanks and eating excessively. We may not be certain if we are finally promoted from the kids’ table to sit with the adults, or if the pumpkin pie will be delicious, but we are always certain that there will be turkey. This fowl is the centerpiece of a day’s worth of labor in the kitchen and the mascot of the holiday. So long as the turkey is golden brown and juicy, we can be certain our meal will be perfect. But are we certain about where our turkey comes from? In the fairy tale of Thanksgiving Day stories, the turkeys roam free on a farm; beautiful feathers attached to healthy, fully matured bodies. But just how Prince Charming is not waiting with a beautiful glass slipper in hand, this turkey fantasy is most likely not true. According to research conducted by PETA, turkeys are drugged and genetically manipulated to maximize breeding. Drugged and genetically modified to the point where they can no longer reproduce naturally. This means every turkey born in a factory farm was artificially conceived. These practices are not necessary to keep up with demand and instead they are intended to increase profits. To put this into perspective, turkeys raised 40 years ago weighed an average of 17 pounds. Today, the average weight is 28 pounds. This obesity plays a big role in their stunted reproductive systems as well as death due to organ failure and heart attacks. Turkeys don’t play a major role in American diets when it’s not holiday season. In fact, approximately 18 percent of turkey consumption takes place on Thanksgiving Day alone. So since we’re mostly eating chicken and fish year-round, this must mean there’s more regulation when it comes to raising these animals, right? Wrong. Chickens are raised much like turkeys and are injected with broth to make the chicken taste like chicken. Fish are raised in aquafarms, their own version of overcrowded and dirty cages. They can all suffer from infections, disease and injuries caused from cramped living conditions. As a result, fish farmers add chemicals to the feed to help the fish combat disease. So if a chicken is injected with hormones and antibiotics to enhance its size and immunity, aren’t we also consuming these same chemicals when we eat the chicken? If added pesticides and hormones are your biggest concern, choosing organic is definitely an option. The word organic has been used with more frequency over the last decade. Grocery stores highlight organic products or choose to dedicate their entire inventory on locally produced organic food. Many shoppers choose to spend extra money for the organic label and probably a peace of mind. But are we being misled? Organic and free-range chickens are slaughtered in the same facilities as factory farms, meaning their flesh is still prone to contamination from unsanitary conditions. Furthermore, “free-range” simply means the chickens
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17 lbs. 1970s
28 lbs. 1970s
Average weight of turkeys by year.
Organic and free-range chickens are slaughtered in the same facility as factorybred chickens.
18% Percentage of turkey consumption on Thanksgiving Day.
need access to the outdoors. If there are 30,000 chickens in a shed that has a small door leading to a small, outdoor square, technically your chicken is free-range. And what about farmers who continue to ethically and sustainably produce meat? Farmers like Frank Reese of the Good Shepherd Poultry Ranch. Reese believes Good Shepherd is not just the name of his farm, but also “a statement of my faith, my philosophy and my approach to farming.” His turkeys mate naturally, reach a marketable weight in about 28 weeks (not days) and are productive for an average of five years. Their ancestors are turkeys, not test tubes and lab machinery. The unfortunate truth is that competition is stiff, which makes farms like these difficult to sustain. The concept of economies of scale states that the more units one produces, the cheaper each unit costs. Factory farming is no different. American business at its finest? Perhaps not. Ashley Falcon, assistant director of wellness at the Patti and Allan Herbert Wellness Center, says “you don’t have to eat organic to be healthy. Many studies actually show that there’s no real nutritional difference between organic and non-organic foods – the distinction is more about pesticide loads.” Yes, the decreased use of pesticides is a bonus, but what about your health? Based on data collected by the American College Health Association, only about six percent of students get the recommended five or more servings of fruits and vegetables per day. Falcon adds, “I also see a lot of students who eat only one or two meals each day while still managing to achieve or exceed their calorie needs, which suggests they’re eating high-calorie convenience foods that have little nutrition.” Eating less meat may not be a result of a sudden interest in animal welfare but rather an increased interest in our own health. It may seem absurd, but meat is not an essential nutrient. Falcon adds that in many cases, people who are vegetarians tend to be healthier than those who eat meat. “So long as a vegetarian is following a healthful diet of fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean sources of protein (animal-free) and healthy fats, he or she is bound to reap the health benefits,” Falcon says. Additionally, eliminating meat reduces consumption of saturated fats, those associated with increasing the risk of chronic diseases. Plant-based diets are also associated with longer lives. However, a balanced diet is still essential albeit more difficult to obtain as a vegetarian. Falcon warns against this: “One can be vegetarian by eating only twinkies and ding-dongs, but this does not make for a healthful diet!” Making the transition to a healthy diet is not too difficult nor does it have to start at the traditionally expensive Whole Foods many of us are so fond of. Falcon suggests starting small. Instead of purchasing the typical tailgate snacks such as potato chips and beer, reach for healthier options such as fresh fruits on a more frequent basis. If money is tight, as is the case with so many college students, take advantage of weekly sales and prepare your own snacks.
The same reason many students chose to attend UM can possibly affect our diet. It is not as common to find fresh vegetables grown in an urban setting as in more rural areas or foreign countries. Dorm rooms are not conducive to herb gardens, nor do you see chicken coups when driving around Coral Gables. But while inner city areas, sometimes referred to as “food deserts,” do not have accessibility to healthy food options, we at UM have access right on campus with our weekly farmers’ market held on Wednesdays by the Green. Maybe we cannot grow our own salads, but luckily our local supermarkets have plenty of healthful options. Falcon sums up her views on nutrition with Michael Pollan’s simple message: “Eat food. Mostly plants. Not too much.” Her suggestions on eating a healthy and balanced diet include choosing foods closer to nature while avoiding overly processed foods, incorporating fruits and vegetables and consuming only what you need. If you follow the formula of balance, variety and moderation, it should not matter if you include some meat in your diet. If you want to learn more about the food industry, start by getting informed. Books such as Jonathan Safran Foer’s “Eating Animals” is critically praised for its investigative take on the subject of industrial farming. There are also sites like eatingwellguide.org that help find sustainable food near you. Write a letter to your Congressman and team up with the Humane Society. The Internet can be your friend. It’s not about giving up meat as a whole. However, take some time to educate yourself. Most of us have read the studies that suggest that eating healthy and leading an active lifestyle can improve our mental performance. If you can take the time to study for an exam, you can definitely take some time to reconsider your meals. Start eating your veggies and maybe the A’s will follow.
EAT LESS MEAT, SAVE “You don’t THE ENVIRONMENT have to eat organic to
be healthy. Many studies actually show that there’s no real nutritional difference.”
U.S. MEAT AND POULTRY PRODUCTION Since the FDA approved the use of antibiotics in animal food in 1953, several studies have proven that these additives cause antibiotic resistance in humans. Some of these studies have been conducted by the FDA itself. Regulations to ban these practices, however, have not been implemented. Number represents billion pounds. Source: National Agricultural Statistics Service.
83 94 54 64 47 33
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The environment is something many of us have grown to be concerned about. Freakish weather patterns and spontaneous hurricanes have us wondering if the apocalypse is really coming. And we all remember those pictures of Leonardo DiCaprio on a glacier asking us to be more mindful of our actions that affect global warming. A fact many of us may not be aware of, however, is that factory farming causes an extreme harm to the environment. Researchers at the University of Chicago found that switching from a meat-based diet to a vegan diet is more effective in fighting against climate change than switching from a standard car to a hybrid. A 2008 German study found that a meat eater’s diet is responsible for more than seven times the greenhousegas emissions compared to a vegan diet. According to the UN, livestock factory farming causes 18 percent of greenhouse gas emission. That’s 40 percent more than what is caused by transportation.
According to the FDA, gas released by cows is the reason for 3.5 percent of U.S. greenhouse gas emissions. The TheLast Political IssueIssue Ever
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Young, wild and
Anxious Anxious words_emma holland. photo_karli evans. design_megan mccrink.
It’s no surprise that everyone at UM is an overachiever. Whether you were Student Government president or captain of the football team in high school, we’re all familiar with what it takes to succeed. And while our goals and ambition may change in college, we seem to be constantly chasing after a brighter future. But are we becoming anxious, stressed and way too uneasy?
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When I was a sophomore in high school, my English class was centered on existential literature. While 15 is maybe too young to fully understand Jean-Paul Sartre’s sentiment, his “Existentialism is a Humanism” essay is what stuck with me most. The principle idea is that “existence precedes essence”—there is nothing to dictate your character or goals, you are simply here until you make something of yourself, whatever that may be. And I can’t help but wonder if this is the root of our obsession with being constantly occupied: a subconscious rush to define ourselves. Nowadays, people more often than not claim to be “so busy!” But it seems both statistically as well as from my own observations that this is self-inflicted or at least societally inflicted. According to a Bureau of Labor Statistics survey on American time use, full-time university and college students in this country only spend 3.4 hours a day on educational activities. Which begs the question: what are we so busy with? In a New York Times story, “The Busy Trap,” writer Tim Kreider talks about how all the busy people he knows have imposed their busyness on themselves - with classes, dinner parties, etc. Perhaps in our search for something defining, something essential, in the most literal sense of the word, we’ve overloaded ourselves with test runs and trials to see where we most click. I find myself falling somewhere in the middle. I don’t resent idle time by any means; I keep a special place in my heart for lazy Sundays and evenings for “Friday Night Lights.” I’m reluctant to overload myself, perhaps because I worry I can’t handle it. I am pretty easily categorized as a perfectionist, sometimes annoyingly so, but because of this I like to know what I like and know what I’m good at. I frequent activities where I know what I can give and how well I’ll do, maybe because I like saying “I am a writer” as opposed to simply “sometimes I write stuff.” This may not be the right attitude to have. Maybe a fear of being stretched too thin keeps people from many possible essences. But on the flip side, I believe that busyness may be preventing us from getting down to the bottom - the bottom of ourselves, of our interests, whatever it may be. Breadth and depth are very different, and I think that sometimes we assume they are equivalent. But in striving for breadth, we often neglect depth, and never actually get at the root of the activities we are taking up or the things we are learning.
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In 1960, a Hungarian psychology professor named Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi began studying a concept called “flow.” Flow is considered to be a mental state in which a person performing an activity is fully immersed in that activity with a feeling of energized focus and full involvement. The motive behind flow is a growth principle: an individual, under flow, is the master of the task at hand. This stretches one’s skills and provides them with a unique feeling of enjoyment and personal development. In a TED.com “Talks” segment, Csikszentmihalyi discusses growing up through World War II and how he saw very few of the adults he knew able to work through warinduced tragedies and find happiness. This got him thinking about what happiness actually is. In his segment, he notes that money cannot make us happy and so we must find pleasure and satisfaction through other means. The concept of flow seems somewhat lost on our constantly multitasking generation. Part of the reason for our constant busyness is because of the need to feel fulfilled by doing many things at once. As flow would suggest, being so busy prevents us from mastering any one endeavor we have taken on, which consequently keeps us from developing deeper skill sets and deeper passions. Students and young people in general do place large worth on money and would use this as one of the biggest markers of success. Csikszentmihalyi would argue that this does not make a life worth living, and in occupying ourselves with these arguably unrewarding activities, we are taking away from the happiness we could find within ourselves, or with flow. At UM, there seems to be a wide range. There are people who pack their schedules, not minding taking the hardest classes and still trying to fit in activities throughout the day, and there are also kids who take classes they never have to go to and wake up after Noon. It seems that the culture we have grown up in plays a more than substantial role on both sides of the spectrum. Students today are often pulled in opposite directions: it might seem cool and enticing to never go to class, but your parents also want you to be a Wall Street tycoon. However, neither of these approaches allow for us to get at the heart of the activities we pursue and to find the ones that are actually right for us. Grace Beitler, a freshman at UM, said that while she considers herself extremely busy, she has somehow found a way to make sure that what she does and the requirements she feels she needs to fulfill also provide her with some
enjoyment. “Yes, I am resumé building, but a lot of the stuff I do I get a sense of fulfillment from,” Beitler said. “I feel like I’ve done something for myself. I try to do it more for happiness and for pleasure than for a resumé.” On the other hand, freshman Jade Lovine has promised herself she would take a break in college. “I did everything in high school. I was the busiest person ever. So I promised myself that in college, at least the first year, I wouldn’t do anything,” Lovine said. “I really thoroughly enjoyed this stuff in high school. But towards the end it made me miserable because I felt like I lost touch with myself by always doing things for other people and running things for other people.”
wE go through our young lives always planning for the future: go to a good high school, get into a good college, land a great job, make more money and so on. For our generation, it seems that busyness—or the lack thereof—is not as much self-inflicted, but more a product of complying with some idea of how we should be living. This is not meant to be some trope about living outside of societal norms and forging your own path, but we live in a much more pressurized society than young people have before. We go through our young lives always planning for the future: go to a good high school, get into a good college, land a great job, make more money and so on. It seems that while each level of our life is a means to an end, there is no actual end. And now, in college, students find themselves still stressing about time and work and getting stuff done. Yet I’ve had to remind myself more than once since starting college that getting good grades is no longer a means. If I’m realistic, that 64 on one math test my freshman year should not make me call home in tears. But there is an almost innate anxiety built into our hardwiring, a constant fear of not being good enough or doing well enough. Students worry about a lot of things
pertaining to their futures. We do not know how to file our taxes, we just figured out voting, and most of us can’t make anything but Fruit Loops. But all of this anxiety comes from the same place: having the future shoved down our throats. Our generation of college kids feels this more and more. There is little-to-no promised economic stability for 20-somethings nowadays. According to the New Yorker, as of 2011, over two million college graduates are unemployed, and millions more are underemployed. That’s even scarier coupled with the fact that Americans today owe over 600 billion dollars in college debt. These ideas, while maybe lacking the specific numbers, are drilled into students’ heads from the time they get accepted. And so it seems that this sits at the back of our minds each day even when we maybe don’t realize it. We all want to be successful, whatever this means. We’d like to be comfortable and keep our families comfortable, and be able to do this while working at something we enjoy. This has, in my mind, become the American dream of college students, yet we all recognize its potential to be unattainable, at least right away. Our attempts at constant movement, constant activity is just one more attempt to beat the statistical odds of real life. Another sentiment existential literature left me with was the idea of “living in the now.” Our generation spends a good deal of time thinking about the future. But existentialism has a point: always looking toward the future severely infringes on the day-to-day. If for no other reason aside from constant background anxiety, focusing solely on the future takes a good chunk of whatever you are doing at that moment. If part of you is always a step ahead of the rest, it is no wonder we are so worried all the time about things out of our control. And so instead of being restless about tomorrow, it’s perhaps a better idea to focus on today. College is here to make you a more educated, well-rounded person. Enjoy the experience while it lasts.
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WHERE WOULD
YOUIF THE HIDE APOCALYPSE
“I would go and party with as many people as I know.”
“I would find a cruise ship and cruise the ocean.” -Jason Estrada
-Dan Englert
WERE
TONIGHT?
“Somewhere with good food.” -David Cortes
With doomsday well on its way, it’s probably time you started deciding where to have your final hurrah. From boats to parties to sacred sanctuaries, these students have a pretty clear idea. words_neil bragdon. photo_kacie nelson. design_ashley brozic.
“In a church or synagogue.”
“Fly home and be with my family.”
-Ronald Fox
-Ashley Hansum
“Cox Science Center. That thing’s a fortress.” -Alex Otto
46 Distraction End Note
“Home. First I would go to confession.” -Maria Camejo
“I’d call my brother and ask him to save me!” -Victoria Sage
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