30 from
Cosmo, pg. 28
“Between” is a preposition, so all of its objects would be objective pronouns like such as, her, me, us, etc., and not nominative pronouns I, he, she, we, etc. It gets tougher when there are multiple objects, and if you’re not sure, just make it one object. If you’re thinking, “If it’s up to you and I,” just pick one object. “If it’s up to you” sounds right no matter what, but clearly (I’m hoping) it sounds dorky to say, “If it’s up to I.” But “If it’s up to me” sounds just ducky, so the correct choices would be, “If it’s up to you and me,” or “If it’s up to him and her,” or “If it’s up to her and me.” But it would not be correct to say “Her and me will throw him a party.” “She and I” is the subject of the sentence, not the object
of a preposition, so it takes that form. Correct use of “who” and “whom” are nearly as simple. If you’re not sure, just take a trial run and substitute “he” for “who” and “him” for “whom,” and you’re basically home free. “It’s for who? It’s for he?” Nyet. Clear as mud, right? Still, many products of the local school system require remedial English tutoring when they’re accepted to the local university. Go figure. Grammar is one of those geek things that some people really dig, and others could not care less about. The 12-sided die is not for everyone. But don’t go saying, “The die are cast.” A die is cast, but dice are cast. Ever wonder why people from foreign countries may not appear to speak correctly? It’s because English is stinkin’
hard to learn even if you grew up speaking it, and especially if you grew up around people who speak it poorly. Speaking proper English can be a real marker of class, and sometimes adherence to the grammar rules can set you in a league of your own. Winston Churchill was a grammar stickler, and he was famous for not wanting to end a sentence with a preposition when describing what he “wouldn’t put up with.” The correct version was “That is the type of thing up with which I shall not put.” In many quarters, that would mean forfeiture of your lunch money on an ongoing basis. When it comes to speaking the pristine form of the King’s English, I’d just as soon make hamburger of some of their sacred cows. If people are listening to what you mean, they’ll hear what you say. If they’re just listening to what you say, they might miss what you mean, mainly
July / August 2013
because they’re playing “Gotcha!” with the language, instead of trying to “getcha.” What bugs me more than grammar gaffs are misunderstandings and misuse of words, which, through their frequent and prevalent misuse, hardly register as mistakes at all…kinda like the compassion of conservatives. “Myriad,” like Multiple Sclerosis, is one of the great cripplers of young adults. One frequently hears, “A myriad of excuses,” which is wrong, but “myriads of excuses” is correct. You see, the “of” is built into myriad. Confused? Simply substitute the word “dozen” for “myriad,” and you’re there. “I have a dozen of eggs? I have dozen eggs?” Nyet and Nyet. A dozen eggs or dozens of eggs becomes a simple substi-
see
Cosmo, pg. 31