United Academics Magazine Nov. 2011

Page 23

GLOBSTERS Globsters, or blobs, are exactly what they sound like: big humps of slimy matter. There are numerous historical accounts of these unidentifiable, partially decomposed carcasses that wash up on beaches. Globsters are frequently alleged to be the remains of strange aquatic creatures, like sea serpents and the kraken. The gigantic octopus is another usual suspect. However, scientific research has dismissed this theory. After carefully examining the ‘Chilean Blob,’ that washed up in 2003, biologists found that the blob was the highly decomposed remains of a sperm whale. Furthermore, the Chilean blob’s DNA matched that of the other blobs exactly. “Once again, to our disappointment, we have not found any evidence that any of the blobs are the remains of unknown sea monsters,” leading researcher Skip Pierce told the audience while presenting his findings. Case closed.

UT NOT DISPROVEN

WING OP EVERYWHERE, WE CAN’T SEEM TO PROVE THEY EXIST.

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