Hays
FOUR They walked to La Momma, a dim restaurant with velvet chair padding, ouvert tousles jours, they saw, throbbing with strollers and babies, ripe, plump, healthy, cooing babies who, she felt, would be speaking a first French word, which would sound to her infinitely more intelligent than the first word of any American baby, whose first words were crass. Her son Nick's first word had been Rock. He had pointed at the sky and said, Rock. Carlo had said Nicky was describing how his crib mattress felt. Or how his mother's breast felt to his lips. Carlo had thought himself a comedian. Then. She had laughed. So it's called 'La Momma," she said. Is she open? he asked. Tous les jours. N ick was staying with a friend in Warwick, going to high school. He was bearing things well, she thought. But it was hard to tell what he felt for his mother now. Une roche, Nicky would have said as a French infant, Une roche, Maman. And that would be beautiful, although suggesting something just as hard behind the words. She would say it of her life. Une roche, the life that appeared inside of adults and grew. They waited for a waitress. Let's prepare to speak French, he said. D'accord, she said. How do you say 'I don't know'? he asked. ]e ne sais pas, she said. You say it quickly: ]e sais pas. The waitress came to the table. ;Vouliez-vous un aperitif! ]e sais pas, Carlo said. She was lost. An appetizer? C'est vegeterienne? she asked. The waitress laughed, Oui. Du champagne? ]e sais pas, said Carlo, and looked at her. Oui, she said. <:;a. She pointed at the menu, to the day's special. Et notre diner, ici. The waitress brought back two champagnes. They sat. They drank. The waitress brought two plates of food. Steak? Carlo asked. Rare? 1 think, she said. I think I ordered beef for us, but asked if the champagne was vegetarian. ]e sais pas, Carlo said. ]e sais pas. He stabbed his meat. She shrugged. To have what you don't want, to ask meaningless questions. C'est Ia vie. He raised his brows and chewed. ]e sais pas. She did not, in fact, know the language well. She'd taken courses in early college. Merci, she told the waitress. Merci. 48
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