20A August 17, 20120, 2012 abuse, from 19A “Sometimes it is just a gut feeling,” Sheridan said. “If they get that feeling that they might be abused, they should make that call.” Making that first call for help was “humiliating” for Mary, who said she didn’t think anyone would understand her problem. Sheridan said overcoming fears of how to provide for children under a singleparent household is difficult to overcome. She said there are many options for closing the income gap, including child support, financial aid and scholarships for education and job placement. One of the difficulties some abuse victims face is they are not currently employed or do not have the training needed to enter the workforce. “Once we get more information we can kind of guide them in the right direction,” she said. Sheridan describes the work with immigrant populations on the issue of domestic abuse as requiring special effort. The nonprofit is working on translating many of its brochures into different languages and has interpreter services available. Aside from the language barrier, there are several cultural differences that pose challenges. Those cultural barriers include religious views, seeking help seen as a sign of weakness or overcoming traditional subservient roles. In some instances, a marriage separation or
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one that ends in divorce is viewed with disdain for religious or cultural reasons. In some of these maledominated societies, women fear reporting their husband to authorities. “They don’t want to get their husband in trouble,” Sheridan said. She said there also is fear of interacting with the criminal justice system because of the language barrier. Some undocumented women fear they will be deported if the police are involved. There is a provision of the federal Violence Against Women Act that allows undocumented women who are the victims of abuse a work permit to remain in the United States. Some minority women who are victims of abuse are trapped since they are unable to communicate in English but their husbands are and are the ones communicating with police.
Repairing the damage Putting one’s life back together after breaking free from an abusive relationship doesn’t happen overnight, Sheridan said. Among the first steps is finding housing. Lewis House in Eagan and Hastings offers temporary housing for victims. While people are at Lewis House, advocates work to find them a safe and affordable place to live. They help them coordinate retrieving their belongings or going back to their home if that is the case. Food shelf services can
help them if needed. The services of 360 Communities also tends to the emotional side. Support groups meet regularly for both women and children who have been victims of abuse. Children’s Support Group for young people who have been abused is a safe place for them to talk about their experiences. Advocates work closely with children to overcome the damage inflicted by abuse whether that entails just talking to them about how it is not their fault, how they can keep themselves safe or even scheduling time with a trained psychologist. Sheridan said it takes about a year before victims can get their lives back in order. “A lot of it is just knowing they can break through it,” Sheridan said. “It takes a lot of energy out of them.” She said the best part of it is the victims are now living on their own and not dependent on someone else. Mary said the first night she spent away from her home was on the floor of a dwelling that was empty except for the bare mattress upon which she slept with her daughter. “I told her we were going to be OK now that we were gone,” she said. “It was a cool feeling to know that we were gone. … It’s a whole new world for me.” Tad Johnson can be reached at tad.johnson@ecm-inc. com or facebook.com/sunthisweek.