April27

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The Pitch

Walter Johnson High School

April 27, 2015

Volume 60, Issue 7

6400 Rock Spring Drive, Bethesda, MD 20814

“Every 15 Minutes”

Students experience the real consequences of drunk driving

By Audrey Marek

“Wake up Peter! Peter, wake up!” shouted senior Jimmy Wyderko across the windy bus loop as police cuffed his wrists and hundreds of students looked on. Fellow senior Peter Caggiano did not stir from his sprawled out position on the hood of a totaled car. Both students were actors in a car crash simulation, one of the events that comprised the “Every 15 Minutes” campaign that took place from March 30-31. The collision, along with other events, was designed to show students the real costs of drunk driving. On the first day of the program, obituaries were read over the loudspeaker as participants were taken out of class by a student in a Grim Reaper costume and a police officer. They then had their faces painted black and white, and were not allowed to interact with the people around them for the rest of the day. “We didn’t know when we were going to be taken, so when [I got pulled out of class] it shocked me,” said junior Christian Campbell. “You can never fully prepare yourself for something like that.” The car crash simulation occurred during lunch of that same day, and included three student “deaths,” two severe injuries, and the arrest of the “drunk driver.” All people who participated in the events then went to an overnight retreat, where they had their

cell phones taken away, to emulate the separation from friends and family that a collision creates. Finally there was an assembly on March 31 featuring a video depicting the follow-up to the crash and a guest speaker, Dan McCoy, who was the driver in a drunk driving collision in 2005. The video created a story around the collision, and showed how it could plausibly happen; it featured Wyderko being peer pressured into drinking at a party, then having to pick up his girlfriend at school. It continued on to re-enact his arrest and sentencing. “Even though I knew exactly what was going to happen, I was surprised by how much the event affected me,” said Wyderko. “The event ended up feeling so real and it was pretty nerve-wracking to be a part of it.” The event was emotionally charged, both for those who participated and those who observed. “[The simulated car crash] affected me a lot,” said senior Grace Sanders. “I know that people make bad decisions, but they should realize that they don’t want to end up like what happened out there.” Senior Dani Vogel has spent the past seven months planning this event, along with the other members of her leadership group, seniors Kate Howie, Michael Harris and Ben Resnick. Even

though Vogel was prepared for the day’s events, she was surprised by how much the event still affected her. Vogel’s best friend, senior Isa Herold, was one of the students taken out of class. The experience was extremely powerful for Vogel. “At the moment, it sunk in that there is the possibility that one day I could be hanging out with my best friend and the next day I could lose her,” said Vogel. Senior and SGA Treasurer Teddy Manogue heard his brother’s obituary read over the intercom, and said that for anyone who knew a person pulled out of class, it was powerful. “It really makes you think about everything,” said Manogue. In previous years, obituaries have not been read over the intercom, but rather only to the classroom of the student being taken. The reading over the intercom causes a greater interruption to instruction throughout the day, but also enables the program to reach a larger audience. “We wanted siblings, friends and everyone in the school to be affected by each person’s ‘death,’” said Vogel. Due to the disruption to class that the program causes, it is only performed every three to four years. “It’s nice that they offer us the opportunity to do this program, but we can’t do it too often,” said staff sponsor Rainer Kulenkampff.

However, this means that some students will only see the program in their freshman or sophomore year, when they do not yet have a permit or license. “It’s a great program, and I think every school should do it at least biannually so every student gets it either their junior or senior year,” said McCoy, who had his own devastating experiences with drunk driving. This year’s planning committee also faced new challenges. The last time “Every 15 Minutes” came to WJ was in 2011, so this year’s seniors had not seen it before, and Kulenkampff was also new to the event. As a result, this year’s team did things slightly differently. Instead of the usual video summarizing the events of the previous day, Vogel decided the video should have more of a plot line to make it more relatable. “The end of the video showed the aftermath of the car crash,” said Vogel, “I wanted [viewers] to imagine their parents getting a phone call that they were in a car crash and they had to rush to the hospital, or imagine their parent calling their voicemail to hear their voice one last time.”

History is an elective social studies class taught by Fred Delello. Delello said that he will teach U.S. History and AP European History next year, because there were simply not enough students registered for Russian History for him to teach it. In her TOEFL class, Suzan Borno helps juniors and seniors prepare for the TOEFL test. The test measures the English language proficiency of students who are not native English speakers but wish to study at colleges in the U.S. If ESOL students perform well on the TOEFL test, it is easier for them to get into universities. Along with TOEFL, Borno currently teaches a special U.S. History class for ESOL students. Recently, her position was partially cut due to ever-changing student needs in the ESOL department, so next year she will be a “.6 teacher” instead of a full-time one. Because she will be teaching fewer classes, administrators had to decide what she could and couldn’t teach. Because U.S. History is required for graduation and TOEFL is only an elective class, TOEFL was

WJ is one of few schools in the country to offer TOEFL, and Borno is sad to see it cut. “The sad part is TOEFL served several purposes, not only to prepare students for the TOEFL test, but also to teach test-taking strategies,” explained Borno. The TOEFL class also prepare students for the SAT and other tests that can enable them to place out of ESOL at Montgomery College. Furthermore, if there are gaps in students’ English, the TOEFL class can address skills that students need to review or may have missed if they skipped a level of ESOL. AP C is currently taught by Michael Richards, but the course will not be offered next year.He will teach three periods of Engineering Science and two periods of AP Physics 1 (AP 1) instead. Richards explained that only 11 students signed up for (AP C), and the budget could not support such a small class. Students usually take AP C after they complete AP Physics B (AP B). However, the College Board recently made AP B a two-year introductory physics

and AP Physics 2 (AP 2). This year, WJ offered AP 1 for the first time, along with AP C for students who took AP B last year. Students who are taking AP 1 this year can finish the introductory sequence by taking AP 2 next year. Richards thinks that many students who are in AP 1 signed up for AP 2 to finish the introductory sequence instead of AP C. “I’m a little sad that [AP C] is being cut because this will be the first time in almost 20 years I’ve been in a school without [the class],” Richards said. “On the other hand, given budgetary constraints and the low numbers, I understand and concur with the decision.” However, once the new College Board physics curriculum has been in place for a few years, Richards believes that AP C will be offered again. Many factors affect what classes can and can’t be offered each year, including class size, budget limitations, and evolving curricula. However, students can be reassured that Multivariable Calculus, Russian History, TOEFL and AP C will likely be brought back in the future.

“Minutes” continued on page 2 Junior Christian Campbell was pulled out of class as part of the “Every 15 Minutes” program. He then had his face painted, and could not speak for the rest of the day.

Cancelled Classes: Four courses to be discontinued next year but not Multivariable Calculus. Russian dropped. class instead of one, thus creating AP 1

By KathrynVan Artsdalen

Every February, students read the Course Bulletin, talk with their teachers and sign up for classes for the following year. Many students eagerly await the opportunity to explore new subjects and take classes they are interested in. What some students may not realize, though, is that course offerings fluctuate year to year. Multivariable Calculus, Russian History, TOEFL (Test of English as a Foreign Language) and AP Physics C (AP C) are currently being taught at WJ but will not be offered next school year. “Not enough students signed up for these particular courses to run,” said counselor Jodi Edmunds. “Students who selected some of these are disappointed [that] their first choice course is not available and will be trying to figure out alternatives.” James Choi teaches Multivariable Calculus, an advanced math class for students who have completed AP Calculus BC. Next year, he will continue teaching AP Calculus BC and SAMM (Statistics and Mathematical Modeling),

News: 2 / Opinion: 3,4 / Feature: 5,10 / A&E: 6,7 / Catch Preview: 8,9 / Sports: 11,12


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Pitch 2 “Every 15 Minutes” uses car crash simulation to NEWS

APRIL 27, 2015

dissuade students from driving drunk

“Minutes” continued from page 1

The effect that drunk driving has on family and friends was also a strong theme throughout McCoy’s presentation. Both the video and McCoy’s speech discussed the legal consequences of drunk driving, which are often de-emphasized in comparison to the more emotional aspects of the situation. “Being arrested and sentenced revealed to me how badly I didn’t want to be in that situation in real life,” said Wyderko. “Hearing the judge powerfully say my name before the sentencing was definitely the scariest part.” McCoy, who served time for his 2005 drunk driving collision, has firsthand experience with the events the video attempted to depict. “I think in reality [the legal consequences do] really pale in comparison to the more emotional consequences, but I can also say, jail sucks, being on probation sucks, being on house arrest sucks,” said McCoy. For many, the event made a lasting impact and strengthened their views on drunk driving. “You can imagine certain things, but seeing them is way different,” said sophomore Jose Pena, who does not yet have his license. “It was just so graphic that now I don’t want to drink and drive.” For those who participated in the event and went on the retreat, it was even more emotional. For Wyderko, calling out to his friends during the simulated car crash and receiving no response was the most powerful part of the event. The retreat also included real life stories not shared at the assembly. “When [Tom] Rogers, my track coach, started to cry when he told us his experience with drunk driving, this was the most impactful for me because Coach Rogers is the toughest man I’ve know in my life and to see it affect him so deeply really hit me hard,” said Campbell. Twenty-two years ago, the son of one of Roger’s friends was driving drunk three days after his 21st birthday. He got into a collision and was killed. “My friend was so distraught that I had to identify the body at the morgue,” said Rogers. Rogers urged students to call him or another adult to drive them home if they are drunk, as any parent would prefer that phone call to one saying that their child is dead.

“Trust me when I tell you that your parents don’t want to go through that,” said Rogers. “You can sort it out afterwards, you have the chance to do that if you are still alive.” The issue of drunk driving does not end with the “Every 15 Minutes” campaign. Though the number of drunk driving collisions has steadily fallen over the past decades; 35 percent of deaths of Americans between the ages of 12 and 19 are the result of motor vehicle crashes. According to McCoy, the stories of people with real life experience are key in continuing to bring that number down. “I think education is the best preventative method,” said McCoy. “I think it’s not reactionary, it’s a more proactive approach.” Rogers agreed that education is important. “One of the things that helps you survive being a teenager is your feeling of invincibility,” said Rogers. “I know we have the big show out front with the car, and your friends are getting called away and getting their faces painted, but this happens every fifteen minutes. Every day. And it never stops... We talk about it on this day, but that clock never stops, and it’s all senseless.”

Photos by Audrey Marek

Clockwise from top: (1) Students who were pulled out of class throughout the day surrounded the bus loop as school let out. (2) A student gets rolled to an ambulance on a stretcher as part of the crash simulation. (3) Some students were left for “dead” in the crash simulation. (4) Wyderko is arrested by real police officers as part of the event.

Bathroom supply shortage, vandalism lead to dissatisfied students

By Emma Higgins and Bradley Stein

It is commonplace for students to complain to each other about uncomfortable toilet paper, stall doors falling of their hinges, a lack of locks and flooded or wet floors in the bathrooms. One of the primary issues currently is vandalism caused when students flood the sinks and stalls and kick soap dispensers off of the walls. “Our bathrooms definitely have room for improvement,” said SGA President Justin New. “Sadly, we cannot switch to Charmin Ultrasoft like I called for in my campaign speech.” While the majority of vandalism occurs in male student restrooms, New recognized a need for consistency throughout the school and equality in all bathrooms. The poor conditions are not only due to misuse and mistreatment by students, but are also a result of a lack of resources. According to New, supplies like toilet paper are purchased by the county and distributed to schools. Junior Ben Simon said that the availability of toilet paper is a big problem. “Of all the times I attempt to use toilet paper, probably 50 percent of the time there’s not a sufficient amount, and 25 percent of the time there is not any,” Simon said. Principal Jennifer Baker elaborated on the constraints on the school’s ability to obtain sufficient re-

He is aware of the concerns that students share and he has hopes for change. Baker also stressed the impact of vandalism. “The boys’ restrooms were missing soap dispensers because we could not replace them fast enough to keep up with the vandals who were kicking [and] pulling them off the walls,” she said. “We will replace dispensers when they are broken, but hope that the vandalism has stopped.” In some circumstances, the bathrooms Photo by Janey Tietz seem beyond repair, but Baker said there Puddles of soap were found on the ground are constant repairs being made. after the vandals stuck in boys bathroom by “We do frequent checks of all restGraphic by Audrey Marek the cafeteria. rooms and clean and refresh as needed throughout the day,” she said. sources. According to Baker, the maintenance and security “Our toilet paper is purchased through the MCPS staff at WJ do their best to replenish resources and warehouse; we are not given other options for the bulk ordering,” said Baker. “They have only one choice maintain cleanliness in the restrooms. Rarey rated the bathrooms a six out of 10, recognizing the tug-of-war and we are obligated to purchase the one brand.” Junior Adam Rarey claimed his biggest issue with between vandals and staff. Administration has expressed that they are very willthe bathrooms was not the toilet paper, but rather the lack of hand sanitizer and paper towels. Senior Sesha ing to respond to complaints by replacing broken or Kammula agreed with Rarey saying that the major missing locks in stalls and installing hand sanitizer outproblem with bathrooms has less to do with vandalism side the vandalized restrooms. However, they said the and more to do with the bathrooms just being kept in only way for change to be made is if students let them know about problems. New asked that students rebad condition. “The boys lost paper towel privileges because they spect the restrooms and be cognizant of their behavior. kept stuffing the sinks with them,” said New.


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OPINION

College student-athletes:

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Too much athlete, not enough student

By Allie Miljanic

University of North Carolina (UNC) at Chapel Hill and Syracuse University are both upstanding schools. Both are large schools known for their Division I athletics. And those athletic teams made the most news for mostly the wrong reasons: academic dishonesty and classes that did not exist, resulting in academically ineligible players being allowed to play. In NCAA basketball, the UNC Tar Heels are always a force to be reckoned with, last winning the men’s NCAA Basketball championship in 2009 and making it to the Sweet 16 this year. But for 18 years, from 1993 to 2011, roughly 3,100 students were enrolled in classes that did not exist. More than half of these students were members of athletic teams, with the revenue-generating football and basketball players comprising most of them, according to News and Observer, a North Carolina newspaper. Students essentially belong to their school once they sign their letter of commitment and agree to play at the collegiate level. They pay for college by compromising their education. The schools make money off these players’ names and skills, and students have the opportunity to gain multi-milliondollar contracts upon leaving school. There is a popular practice in Division I basketball called “one and done” which means athletes play one year of college basketball (a requirement by the NBA) before they join the NBA,

resulting in neither a degree nor work skills following what could be a short professional career. Grades and classes do not matter to most of these athletes who choose to take made-up classes, as they are simply using college as a steppingstone to a successful life as a professional player. For that one year they are attending school and playing their sport, the requirements that they have, whether the multiple days a week for practice or needing to travel to play in games, are intense. Their schedule prevents them from fully dedicating themselves to being a normal student. This is an unfair practice to student athletes and it is also unfair

to regular students. Scholarships for college are hard to come by and for many students, where they get money from plays a huge role in what college they attend. Merit scholarships, which students earn for good grades or leadership positions, often come with the requirement that they maintain a 3.4 GPA in college, yet to receive a D1 scholarship for college, student- athletes only need a 2.3 GPA and a total score of 1,000 on their SAT. Yes these athletes have skills very few people possess but they should be held to a higher academic standard and truly earn their places in universities as prestigious as UNC. Why are athletes not held to the same academic standards as everyone else on campus? If athletes are taking fake classes or having a tutor write their papers, like what happened at Syracuse, they are being cheated out of their money and education for the slim chance to maybe make a couple million dollars. My education is an investment in me, as it should be for every single student attending a university regardless of athletic ability. Scandals such as these and pressures put on student athletes take away from that investment.

Graphic by Steven Judge

When colleges and student-athletes value sports over academics, it is unfair to students who take their studies seriously.

Judgment of younger children is unprecedented help feeling a little superior because my childhood was spent predominantly playing with real toys and my imagination. I know I am not alone in feeling that I had a “better” or “more real” childhood than young children today, but it is important to remember that this sense of superiority comes from the fact we were born before it was possible to give a two-year-old an iPad. If we were born after 2003, I am sure I would have been exactly like the girl I was babysitting. I got a red iPod Shuffle for Christmas when I was eight, but I’m sure if I were just turning eight now, I Once I was babysitting a seven- would receive something far more techyear-old girl who asked me if I had any nologically advanced. When we were in “technology,” and I replied that I had an middle school, flip phones were all the iPhone and my brother and I shared a rage and girls brought digital cameras computer. She told me how jealous she everywhere to document their lives. Towas, because all of her friends had iPads day, many middle school students have and all she had was a Leapster that she iPhones or other smartphones, but we hated. Leapsters were invented when I would have had those things too if they was five, iPhones when I was nine and had been available. iPads when I was 12. When I go to a It is natural for one generation to be restaurant and see children playing on scornful and even jealous of younger tablets given to distract them, I cannot

generations. As Millennials, we are characterized as being lazy, entitled and narcissistic, with technology, social media and selfies commonly cited as being contributory towards our self-obsessed natures. We are too familiar with teachers telling us to put away our phones as they disdainfully remark on how addicted we are, but who is to say that if they were our age they would not also have a smartphone permanently in their hand? The character traits of our generation are determined by society, exactly like all the generations before us. There is not some inherent flaw in all Millennials, but rather the world we were born into is shaping who we are. The girl I babysit sees the world in a certain way because of her environment, friends, the media, her parents and countless other factors. When teenagers look down on younger members of our own generation, we are simply continuing a cycle of judgment: an older group of people feels superior to a younger one because of societal factors that shaped each group.

Social media does not belong in the classroom By Ben Resnick Last year I went on a college visit at the University of Maryland at College Park. It was part of the program “Terp for a Day,” where I went around to various classes with a current student. It was a great opportunity to see what college was like. I greatly enjoyed my day at College Park, but there was one thing about my experience that did not sit well with me. While sitting in class, nearly every student was either on a laptop, phone or tablet. The majority of these students were not using the technology to take notes, but rather to check sites such as Facebook and Instagram. This really bothered me because not only were they being incredibly rude to the professor by not listening to the lecture, (there was no way they were computing the information she was teaching) but also it is a waste of the students’ and teacher’s time. Many of the students in that class are paying over $9,000 a year for in-state tuition, and if they are not from Maryland, they are paying over $28,000 a year. These students are essentially wasting this money by choosing to spend class time scrolling through social media rather than paying attention and absorbing the material. While my experience was at one particular university, I believe the issue of skewed priorities of college students is an epidemic that is occurring at universities all across America. At WJ, the technology obsession seems to be less severe. Although it is common to see students with their phones in their laps, a large portion of the students are attentive and participate in the classroom. This allows for a livelier classroom and encourages more involvement with instruction. Students who are on their phones in class take away from everyone’s learning as they inhibit a motivated and productive class. Students should stop using their phones and other devices in class as it obstructs their learning and the learning of others around them. Technology can help with instruction but only in certain situations guided by the instructor. Social media has its place in our society, but that place is not the classroom.


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OPINION

Real-world application should be a classroom focus By NickWilliamson

The question, “When am I ever going to use this?” is uttered by students during times of academic frustration, to the annoyance of many teachers. It becomes a roadblock to education for both students and teachers. Students asking themselves this question feel no connection to the subject or material and choose to neglect it, and this apathetic student body makes the teachers’ job of disseminating information increasingly difficult. In defense of teachers, sometimes students need to work harder to overcome their negative attitudes about education. By finding ways that the material they learn fits into their lives the subject becomes much more interesting. For example, I always considered most electives to be a waste of my time. I know I will never be an artist when I grow up, so being forced to take an art class seemed like I was enrolling in a subject that would lose all significance to me after this year. Since then, I have grown to appreciate my art class, and after getting

APRIL 27, 2015

past my initial beliefs, I have realized that the skills I developed in Digital Art actually have a lot of practical applications, especially in an economy where technology is constantly growing in importance. Not only has overcoming this belief made my hard work in class more worthwhile, it has also helped me to genuinely enjoy being in that class and appreciate the chance to be creative that is not as present in other classes. It is also partly the teacher’s responsibility to demonstrate the connections between what knowledge students learn in class and how students may apply that in their careers. At this point, students have reached the age where the old reasoning of “This is important because I say it is,” no longer carries the same weight as it did when they were younger. While students may continue to do the work required of them, they will lose respect for the subject and lose interest in the material if they do not see any future benefit. It would not be difficult for teachers to connect classwork to life outside the classroom or even tie it into their lessons. Doing so would increase student interest and participation in class discussion. Teachers would have much more engaged students and meaningful experiences in the classroom because students, rather than seeing just another set of math problems or another passage from a novel to analyze, would see careers or activities that they have connections to outside of school. This means that students will be more receptive to their education, and ultimately lead to better test scores, grades and attitudes towards learning. Students: rather than ignore the topics you dislike, embrace them. Teachers: rather than merely give students the information they need to know, point out the relationships between what they are doing now and how they can use it in the future. Developing connections between classroom learning and real world application, as well as overcoming the relevancy roadblock, only serves to enhance the educational experience for the learned and the learning.

It is partly the teacher’s responsibility to demonstrate the connections between what students learn in class and how they may apply that in their future careers.

Buying American is worth the hype By Gideon Epstein To buy or not to buy? That is the question millions of Americans face daily relating to which goods to purchase. From simple groceries to a new car, buying American products is often encouraged, but it is nearly always more expensive than the alternative. All in all, buying American benefits the domestic economy; it allows small businesses the opportunity to develop. In many cases, small businesses choose not to get involved with foreign transactions because of the implicit conversion fees for different currencies. While prices for domestic goods are normally far more expensive than goods produced in Vietnam or China where wages are lower, buying American acts as a prohibitive measure to avoid recession. Purchasing power parity (PPP) is an economic measure of how much a given basket of goods will cost in one nation versus another with their respective currencies. A popular measure of PPP is the Big Mac Index, which measures how much the McDonalds hamburger costs in various countries. For example, a Big Mac in China is 41 cents cheaper than in the U.S. In more cases than not, countries with a negative value on the Big Mac Index are places where many goods are produced due to weak currencies. One U.S. dollar is equal to over six Chinese yuan. Even though a given good will be cheaper if produced in China because of PPP, buying the slightly more expensive American good will stimulate growth in the U.S. economy in the long run.

Another fundamental economic law applied to the question of buying American is comparative advantage. Comparative advantage demonstrates the merit in international trade based on cost of production. If China can produce jeans at a cheaper price than the U.S., it encourages the U.S. to import jeans produced in China. This in turn lowers prices for customers in the U.S. The relatively small number of jeans produced domestically can be upward of double the price of jeans imported from China or other less developed countries. Despite the price hike, if you buy goods like jeans made in the U.S., you are not only likely to receive higher quality denim, but you are working towards creating domestic jobs. The more people who buy American, the more American jobs are created with fair wages and health-labor regulations that do not exist overseas. Not only are there clear economic advantages from an academic perspective, but because of the higher minimum wage in the U.S. versus China and third world nations, production in the U.S. is generally a higher quality process resulting in goods that will last longer. Essentially, you get what you pay for. If you are on a strict budget each month, then buying American goods can be nearly impossible. However, keep in mind that what goes around comes around. In other words, if you buy American when possible, the domestic economy will get stronger over time and you will tend to get higher quality goods that last longer. Photo from Britannica ImageQuest

THE STAFF EDITORS-IN-CHIEF Audrey Marek, Print Co-Editor Ben Resnick, Print Co-Editor Selma Stearns, Print Co-Editor Amanda Gross, Online Co-Editor Marissa Nardella, Online Co-Editor ADVISOR Sylvie Ellen, Print and Online NEWS Izzy Salant, Print Editor Gideon Epstein, Print Assistant Editor Anna Hovey, Online Co-Editor Kelly Chartrand, Online Co-Editor OPINION Nick Williamson, Print Editor Charlie Kanter, Print Assistant Editor Zoey Becker, Online Editor FEATURE Anja Shahu, Print Editor Kevin Lu, Print Assistant Editor Leila Siegel, Online Editor ARTS AND ENTERTAINMENT Annika La Vina, Print Editor Mary Kate Greening, Print Asisstant Editor Evan Candelmo, Online Co-Editor Zack Shapiro, Online Co-Editor SPORTS Jake Weinischke, Print Editor Patrick Jorling, Print Assistant Editor Kevin O’Leary, Online Editor Grant Weaver, Online Assistant Editor COPY EDITORS Suejean Han Daniel Flesch ART

Steven Judge

PUBLIC RELATIONS Shashank Narayan, Social Media Consultant, Business Manager Gideon Epstein, Assistant Business Manager Emma Higgins Allie Miljanic Joshua Lang Daniel Flesch Meg Tamara Bradley Stein

STAFF WRITERS

Daniel Leonard Iris Vukmanovic Kara Gordon Kathryn Van Artsdalen Suejean Han Janey Tietz

The Pitch is published eight times a year by the students of Walter Johnson High School, population of 2,234 and located at 6400 Rock Spring Drive, Bethesda, Md. 20814. Advertising and subscription rates are available by calling 301-803-7184. Opinions represent those of The Pitch staff and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the staff, faculty or student body. We welcome letters, articles, photographs and artwork, to be submitted to room 193 or e-mailed to thepitch@walterjohnson.com. The Pitch is an award-winning paper that works towards providing the student body with accurate, as well as credible, information.

AWARDS Columbia Scholastic Press Association Marylander Award Newspaper Division C 2011 Columbia Scholastic Press Association Gold Medalist 2009, 2013 Columbia Scholastic Bronze Medalist 2011

American Scholastic Press Association First Place 2011 Columbia Scholastic Press Association Silver Medalist 2014


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APRIL 27, 2015

FEATURE

5

Madrigals and Orchestra perform their way to States By Allie Miljanic

The musical department at WJ is filled with immensely talented musicians, with Madrigals and Advanced Choir moving on to the state competition. Madrigals takes its name from a style of music that was heavily featured during the Renaissance period. Also representing WJ at the state level is Symphonic Orchestra, which is made up of only string instruments. Both Madrigals and Orchestra have been successful this year at Festival. Both scored straight ones, which is the highest possible score on a one to four scale for choirs and a one to five scale for Orchestra.

Madrigals performs in a competition called Festival where choirs from all across the county come to perform pieces for judges who score their performance. “After a choir performs a warm up piece and then two scored pieces, they receive a numbered score... A choir then performs two sight reading tasks, which are also scored. If a choir scores mostly ones, then it can move on to state festival,” said senior Amanda Tang, who is a member of Madrigals. One of the most unique things about this choir, which is one of four (General, Advanced, Pop Fly and Madrigals), is that their specialty is singing Renaissance music, and they wear outfits that are reflective of that time in history. Advanced Choir and Madrigals are both going to states and are both led by director Kelly Butler. “Advanced Choir has now made it to state four years in a row and last year received a perfect score in sight reading,” said Butler. Not only are there multiple types of choirs at WJ but there are also two different orchestras: Concert , conducted by Butler, and Symphonic, conducted by Christopher Kosmaceski. Performing at such a high level is demanding in regards to the amount of time spent practicing to perfect pieces. “Practice and dedication are the only two things you need to get better,” said senior James Kim who is first chair, first violin in the symphonic orchestra. Throughout his high school performing career, Kim has found himself practicing on average a half hour every day. Orchestra Festival is similar, yet slightly different,

“Practice and dedication are the only two things you need to get better”

Photo courtesy of Emma Higgins

The Madrigals are going to states wearing their head turning Renaissance attire that the choir is known for.

Photo courtesy of Emma Higgins

Madrigals follow director Kelly Butler and their voices to the state competition.

than the choir’s. For one, their scoring system is on a one to five scale versus a one to four scale, with points based on categories like tone, intonation, stylistic considerations, etc. “Each school comes and plays three pieces: A warm up and two judged pieces. The two judged pieces are then evaluated and given a score out of five… After the on stage performance, each group goes to the sight reading room to sight read a piece,” said senior Caroline Braviak, a three year member of the WJ symphonic orchestra. Symphonic orchestra has made it to States for the last eight years. WJ musicians are a skillful bunch, as proven by their perfect scores at Festival and consistency in moving onto states where they also have a history of performing well. This year is no different.

Club Profile: New clubs fill in gaps for WJ By Kevin Lu

Startup Club

Another club that was created recently is the Startup club.Tanapon Kuptanon created the club along with her friends at the beginning of this school year. The club officers are President Kuptanon, Vice President Naomi Ishida, Secretaries Radhika Gupta and Ben Lee and Treasurer Adam Szekeres. The club meets every other Friday during lunch in room 111. The main goal of the club is to focus on different students’ ideas and then find ways to make their ideas a reality. The Startup club uses this process to get different ideas off the drawing board. The club created an iPhone app with help from the National Science Founda-

tion during the summer. The app allows people to find songs to listen to. “We support and encourage innovative thinking,” Kuptanon said. Kuptanon described the Startup club as being a support club for any students with big dreams or aspirations like starting a small business or selling items such as mobile phones. “We help people go all the way [with their ideas]. We want it to come true,” Kuptanon said. “Our members have experience in all sorts of things like marketing. Our focus is not on the club. Our focus is on the students [and their ideas].”

Photo by Kevin Lu

From left to right: Sophomore president of the Electronic Music club Josh Quinto works on an old music project along with Sophomore Fox Bennett using FL Studio during a lunch time meeting.

Electronic Music Club

By Kevin Lu

There were people laughing and yelling mixing in with lots of pounding music and a nice hint of female vocals. The Electronic Music club was created by Josh Quinto when he was a freshman at WJ during the 2014 school year. The club is now approximately one year old and has been very successful, attracting students with a passion for FL Studio and Pro Tools. These programs help aspiring producers create electronic music that is high quality and appealing. “Nowadays, the huge craze is for electronically made music because you can create sounds that you can’t create with acoustic instruments,” said Quinto. However, the electronic music club doesn’t just work on electronic music.

The club also occasionally works on jazz or orchestral music. The club currently uses the sound equipment in Colin Fotia’s room in 190D on Mondays and Thursdays every week during lunch. Colin Fotia is the sponsor of the club and is WJ’s IT support specialist. “The workplace that we have is a special place for us where we can all get together and throw a bunch of ideas into a computer,” Quinto said. “It is a dedicated place where we can just bang out some tunes.” Quinto helps teach the members how to use the two programs and hopes to share the music with the WJ community.

Photo by Kevin Lu

From top row, left to right: Seniors Kento Nomura, Radhika Gupta, juniors Adam Szekeres and Andrea Perez, freshman Paola Pastor and senior Misra Howard. Middle row: Senior Jane Xie. Bottom row: Seniors Naina Thangada, Ben Lee and Tanapon Kuptanon are all in the Startup Club.



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ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

APRIL 27, 2015

Maple Tree Campground

With 20 acres of wooded camping areas, Maple Tree Campground provides yearround hiking, camping and river-rafting as a perfect escape from the Bethesda 窶話urbs. Camping options range from tent sites, tree houses and tree cottages, starting at $6.00 to $10.00 a night. Only a short hour away from Washington, D.C. in the heart of the Appalachian Mountains, the campground offers timeless fun at a low cost.

Photo courtesy of Celine La Vina

Go Ape Zip Line & Treetop Adventure Photo courtesy of Gabriella Ballesteros

Historic Harpers Ferry in West Virginia combines old-world charm with unique outdoor adventure by offering a wide array of activities. Located an hour and a half away from D.C. and situated right next to the Potomac River, the town features over 20 hiking trails around the river. The town is also in close proximity to other national parks, such as the Cedar Creek and Bell Grove National Park and the Catoctin Mountain Park.

Harpers Ferry

For a unique zip-lining experience, head to Go Ape Adventure Park in Rockville, Md., located just 20 minutes from the Bethesda area. Participants are equipped with harnesses and pulleys, and are let loose into a forest canopy.

Photo courtesy of Gabriella Ballesteros

Cure spring new expe

By Annika

As the days get longer gets higher, the urge the perfect spring w same rate the flower different ideas for f in the Beth

Near Harrisonburg, Va. sits Shenandoah National Park, an escape from the busy urban life of D.C. With protected wilderness, great views and numerous bike trails, this hour-away destination is ideal for a different kind of cycling away from the usual trails.

Photo by Annika La Vina

Shenandoah National Park

Custis Trail

Take a look at the Virginia side of the Potomac by riding on the Custis Trail, which is Metroaccessible and lesser-known than the Crescent Trail in D.C. These hilly, difficult trails that connect to other places such as Key Bridge offer an active afternoon filled with fun.

This 18-mile popular route runs straight through Alexandria and frames the Potomac River. The trail follows the river, and passes through scenic parks and neighborhoods. The trail also connects to the Custis Trail for more biking.

Photo courtesy of Matt Pombuena

Mount Vernon Trail


the

Pitch

APRIL 27, 2015

Potomac Overlook Regional Park

Shenandoah National Park has many good hiking trails and paths, but climbing Old Rag Mountain yields stunning views from the top after a slightly challenging climb. It is nearly a mile to the summit, so pack well and be ready for crowds.

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Little Bennett Regional Park

Photo courtesy of Celine La Vina

Photo courtesy of Gabriella Ballesteros

A short exit off of George Washington Memorial Parkway, Potomac Overlook Regional Park brings beautiful waterfalls and small trails for an action-packed day. This hidden gem also goes through Teddy Roosevelt Island and Key Bridge for a quick stop to Georgetown.

Old Rag Mountain

North of Montgomery County lies Little Bennett Regional Park and Campground, a virtually undeveloped area filled with native plants and animals as well as natural trails and historical sites. There are three types of trails for hikers- hard surface, natural surface, and hiker only (no equestrian or bike trails).

fever with eriences

a La Vina

r and the temperature to take advantage of weather grows at the rs do. Here are some fun-filled afternoons hesda area.

Gravelly Point Park

The Yards Park

Spend a breezy afternoon in Yards Park, overlooking the Anacostia River in Southeast Washington, D.C. A 10-minute walk from Nationals Park, the Yards Park boasts acres of green space and unique restaurants to keep you occupied for hours. Head down toYards Park this summer and sit in on a free summer concert.

Photo courtesy of Celine La Vina

Photo by Annika La Vina

With 400 acres of museums, grassy spaces and picnic areas to choose from, it’s no wonder that the U.S. National Arboretum attracts hundreds of people per day. As a perfect destination for a unique day trip, the Arboretum is open every day from 8:00 am to 5:00 p.m. and offers numerous year-round exhibits.

U.S. National Arboretum

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Photo by Annika La Vina

For a different park experience, travel to Gravelly Point Park near Ronald Reagan National Airport. Open every day from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m., the park offers an ideal space to watch the planes land and take off. Right on the water and with great open land, Gravelly Point Park’s free fun is sure to please.


8

W E I V E R P ER H P A C P L A C I AT TIR

SO FLUFFY I JUST CAN’T EVEN

ALMOST SUMMER, 2015

CMORE FROM WJ’S SAOON! COMING S

How to spot a MoCo student

Distinguishable traits

MoCo students can easily be spotted by their leather feet, often nicknamed the “Sperry”. Students use these “Sperrys” in every season, ranging from cold winter nights to hot summer days. Many students are also seen with what can only be described as a whale on their chest or backs. Scientists are unsure why the students choose to sport said whale in different pastel colors, and are in the process of deciphering the phrase “Vineyard Vines”. Many believe the phrase alludes to some sort of place, but it may forever be a mystery. Students also have many different rivalries, stemming from their habitat. Students from around the Bethesda, Potomac, Wheaton and Silver Spring area seem hostile towards one another for no particular reason.

By Annika LaVina The mysterious Montgomery County student has baffled scientists for decades. This year, new studies have been released that finally offer some insight into the puzzling creature. Catch your own by recognizing its unique traits.

Behavior MoCo students are often kind and gentle creatures,

but when feeling threatened, for example, when their “fro-yo” is taken, the students can transform into deadly predators. Students range in behavioral patterns, they differ in what scientists call “personalities”. Because of this new observation, MoCo students are famous for being one of the most diverse species in the country. According to scientists, no two MoCo students are the same and every student has its own distinct behavior. Students also demonstrate what scientists think are some sort of hierarchies. MoCo “upperclassmen” tend to boss around Photo from www.flickr.com, Scott Beale the “underclassmen” in some sort of attemptStudents are under the to declare their dominance. primitive illusion that

Photo from www.flickr.com, Raleene Cabrera

Scientists are unsure why “ laces” on“Sperrys” exist.

“ fro-yo” is healthier than “ice-cream”.

How to catch one

Habitat

Look for Montgomery County students in and around the Bethesda area. Teens nest at home then flock to school, and can be widely found in densely populated areas such as Montgomery Mall (a common destination for students) or Chipotle. If you happen to come across one in its natural habitat, try your best not to provoke itMoCo students are calm by nature but tend to be rash when put in a dangerous situation.

Montgomery County, home to the MoCo student.

To set up a MoCo student trap, all you need are a few simple supplies. Position bait, such as a Chipotle burrito, next to a cup of Starbucks coffee. In order to attract the student, you must cup your hands around your mouth and repeat the call “Patagonia discounts!” over and over. Sure enough, one will appear at the first sound of the cry. Do not be alarmed, and calm the creature down by feeding them a few bits of the burrito. If Photo from www.flickr.com, Louis Abate all goes according to plan, they will approach MoCo students can be found in their and feed. natural habitats, drinking a Venti Iced Photo from ClipArt

A carton by Steven Judge

Skinny Hazelnut Macchiato, Sugar-Free Syrup, Extra Shot, Light Ice, No Whip.


The season of baseball

CM ATCH PR

PELOTAS

9

EVIEW

ORE FROM WJ’S SATIR ICAL PAPE COMING S R OON!

Graphic by Selma Stearns

This local father can be seen encouraging his daughters at the park. He watches as they run laps calling out splits and advice.

Parents are not crazy! They’re just doing whatever it takes to create winners

By Daniel Flesch

Today’s parents and coaches are stepping up efforts and utilizing new resources to ensure their children can be the most successful athletes possible. Recently, nine-year old soccer player Dave Carver has been quite the example of this phenomenon, although he lacks in height, strength, agility and ability the adults in his life still believe he has what it takes to be great. “I make sure he goes to bed at exactly 7:36 P.M.,” said Dave’s mom. “I believe with my help he can be the next great soccer prodigy.” Dave warms-up and exercises every day before chowing down on a typical 3000 calorie breakfast. His mother oversees all of his morning activities. Kids with such devoted and determined mothers must see the whole picture. “My son could be the best soccer player in the world if he just stuck to the workout plan I made him,” said Dave’s mom.

Student gone

Devoted parents have spent countless dollars on the most trendy protein bars for their young super star. Specifically, the X-Nutrabar has become all the more popular. According to the most cutting-edge parents, this $45 Nutrabar can sufficiently supply the electrolytes and protein necessary for their young athlete’s top level performance. Not only is nutrition important to these recreational masters, but also the highest quality equipment. Recently, in a more popular trend, mothers have made sure their children have all of the equipment they need to be successful. “We bought Dave those $325 Nike Mercurial Superfly FG iD soccer cleats,” said Dave’s mom. “They are the most technologically advanced cleats on the market, so I knew Dave had to have them. Let’s see how Bobby McFee’s mother feels about that when all he has are last year’s $200 pair.” Dave’s dad also maintains constant support for his son during games and practices.

“I mean, I do everything,” said Dad. “I give constant encouragement by running with my kid up and down the sidelines, I yell as loud as I can.” Greg Blach, Dave’s teammate who starts over Dave has a differing opinion on Dave’s father’s cheering. “I mean Dave comes in for five minutes a game and all we can hear is his dad screaming,” said Greg. “It’s gotten to the point where I don’t even want to take a water break.” Some dads go beyond the minimum show of support by even being so gracious as to offer small profanities to referees when calls do not benefit their kid on the field. “I want Dave to have the passion I do,” said Dave’s father. Dave’s parents will continue to push him to his best athletic potential, even if he is riding the bench on his fourth grade recreational soccer team.

Amber alert sounded for missing: Kiernan Keller

By Ben Resnick

ing up signs and posters while searching for her.” As it turns out, Keller was out on a long run, training for the Penn Relays that occurred later that week. She started her run at 2:45 p.m. and by 3:30 p.m. there was already an Amber Alert out for her. The alert went out for a young girl with dark hair in the Bethesda, Rockville, Chevy Chase, Kensington area out running, likely in shorts. “We were getting calls from people all over the area saying they saw someone who fit our description,” said Beaubien. As it turned out, this Amber Alert was a bit too broad, and WJ security ended up chasing down several high schoolgirls who were just out for an afternoon run or jog. Keller in fact had gone on a run through the trails in Cabin John and returned to WJ at 4:02 p.m. She then went down to the track to start her stretching. “I noticed a few kids from the lacrosse team looking and pointing at me,” said Keller. “I had no clue what was going on; it was kind of strange.” The lacrosse team had heard the Amber Alert and realized that they had found the lost girl. “A little after 4 p.m. we finally had the breakthrough we were hoping for,” said Beaubien. “We received information from the lacrosse team that Keller was stretching on the track.” A press release from the Walter Johnson security staff read that they were relieved to have Keller back as she is a very valuable part of the WJ community. Photo Courtesy of Kiernan Keller, graphic by Audrey Marek After all this pandemonium, Keller was still unHere is an example of one of the posters that went up looking for fazed. On the afternoon of April 22, mass panic occurred at WJ. Two time state champion track runner, senior Kiernan Keller, was reported missing, leading to a chaotic day. Head of security Howard Beaubien was alerted of Keller’s unknown whereabouts early that Wednesday afternoon. “As soon as I heard that she was missing I sent out a missing persons report to the rest of security,” said Beaubien. “We had people out in the community hang-

Kiernan Keller.

Photo courtesy of MocoRunning

Senior Kiernan Keller went missing but it turned out she was just out for a run like this, except it was in the woods.

“I’m just kind of confused,” said Keller. “I was just out for a run.”


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FEATURE

APRIL 27, 2015

S*T*A*G*E crew works together to make “Shrek the Musical” a success By Anja Shahu

With each line an actor delivers, a light accompanies the voice, makeup lines the face, a costume exaggerates the character’s personality and a set transports the audience to another world. Each of these essential details are a testament to the hours of hard work that S*T*A*G*E crew puts into making each musical a success.

Preparation

When the crew learned that “Shrek the Musical” would be performed this spring, they immediately sat down to discuss how they would tackle the new challenge. Different crew members, who are split into categories, such as makeup, wardrobe and lights, took varying approaches to fulfilling their jobs. Makeup mistresses juniors Julia Souza and Mandy Spiwak said that because the characters are inspired by fairy tales, they had some more freedom when designing the fantasy creatures’ makeup. “‘Shrek the Musical’ demands so much more from makeup, and this is the first time we worked with prosthetic makeup, which was very exciting,” said Souza. Wardrobe mistress junior Zoe Jansen said it would be a challenge to recreate the unique characters because of the sheer volume of costumes required. Jansen got together with her fellow wardrobe crew members to analyze the script first and decide on the costumes that each character would need. Then, Jansen was able to design or rent unique costumes for each character. Co-lighting designers junior Ella Sheppard-Saidel and senior Yuval Raviv, annotated the script to find anything that specifically called for the usage of lights. Then, they created their own unique concepts and ideas, such as the lighting for the scene when Shrek, Donkey and Dragon are fighting in slow motion, while Fiona sings. “The lights are dim and red, and there is a white strobing effect happening. The only face that’s illuminated from the front is Fiona’s, by spotlight,” said Sheppard-Saidel. “We have the spotlight turning on when the slow-mo starts and off when the slo-mo ends, so it’s like an outside experience for Fiona, since it’s essentially her thoughts that she’s singing.”

Hell Week

“The art of theatre is the art of collaboration, as our tech director [James P. Mulhern III] says,” Sheppard-Saidel said. Communication is an integral skill in crew when it comes to getting through the stressful week before showings begin, more commonly known as “hell week” and offically known as “tech week”. “Collaboration and teamwork is everything in crew and throughout stage itself and without communication, we would fail,” Jansen said. During the production of “Shrek the Musical”, the crew worked together to put the finishing touches on the show. Sheppard-Saidel and Raviv utilized the week to focus on essential and creative lighting elements. “When all the lights are set up, we get to fiddle with the light board and figure out what we want each scene and moment to look like,” Sheppard-Saidel said. For Jansen and the rest of wardrobe crew, most of the costumes had already been finished before the week began, so it was a chance to practice any quick changes the show would require or make alternations to costumes. The makeup crew used the time to solve any last minute problems and practice putting on each character’s makeup in the short span they would have during the showings. “For ‘hell week,’ it’s extremely important that the entire crew is ready for the most difficult task...transforming Fiona into an ogre in a very short amount of time,” Souza said. Impromptu challenges can always occur at inopportune moments as the showings begin. However, the work done during “hell week” gives all the crew members the preparation to tackle each difficulty that could arise during the show calmly and efficiently. “We always make sure that by show week we have plenty of practice with makeup so that if something does occur, our entire crew is ready for it,” Souza said.

Curtain Call

When the last show ends and the curtain drops, the crew’s work is done for that musical. After all the stress and time utilized creating the best possible

Photo by Selma Stearns

Senior Danya Firestone, who plays Gingy in “Shrek the Musical”, has her makeup done before the Sunday preformance.

play, the crew is finally able to relax, but the moment is bittersweet. “When a show ends, you feel not only the relief that you got through all the stressful times but it’s also sad because you’ll never get to experience that show in the same way with the same people again,” Jansen said. After all the work and time spent together, members form close and lasting connections. Consequently, these friendships make the moment of realization that the show is over just a little more difficult to accept.

“It’s hard to come away from a show,” said Sheppard-Saidel. “You get really attached to everyone involved because of the close proximity, and thus it’s difficult to just walk away from spending every evening with them.” However, in the end, it’s the moment of applause that the crew looks forward to enjoying the most. “Sure it’s stressful and takes up a lot of your time, but if it’s something you love to do, in the end when you see it all work out, you’ll know that it was all worth it,” Souza said.


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APRIL 27, 2015

SPORTS

11

Boys lacrosse makes adjustments on the fly to fill gaps left by 12 graduating seniors

Photo by Dan Radack

Junior midfielder, Lewis Kirwan races up the field during a game against rival BCC. WJ won the game by a score of 18-1.

By Daniel Flesch and Patrick Jorling Boys Varsity Lacrosse looks to come back strong this season after taking a big hit to their roster. This season, the team is comprised of 14 seniors, nine sophomores and six juniors. They are without 12 graduated seniors, 10 of whom were starters last year. They led last year’s team to a 13-4 season. This season, the team focuses on maintaining the win-

p O I N T

ning culture that they have established, but it will not be easy. Many of the holes left by last year’s seniors will have to be filled by new starters this season. “Our keys to success this year are hard work,” said head coach Alan “Poho” Pohoryles. “We are not as talented as teams in the past so we will have to make up for that with hard work every day in practice.” Senior captain Billy Cave said that the

Specialization helps develop elite athletes By Patrick Jorling

Specialization in sports has become an increasingly polarizing topic, especially for elementary to middle school aged kids. Today more than ever, there are resources such as individual coaches that can help make a player better at their sport. But, in order to take full advantage of these opportunities, high school athletes need to commit to one sport full time, and they can have the best opportunity to fulfill their dream of playing at the next level. They may need to focus on making them the best that they can be at the sport that they find they are strongest at and like the most in order to play at the next level. For those high school athletes who wish to play in college, a lot of time and dedication is needed to realize that goal. College level athletes have worked tirelessly to refine the skills needed in their sport in order to be able to play at that level.They also play on travel teams

outside of school that help gain them exposure to college coaches. A prime example of a success story of specialization at a very early age is tennis player Andre Agassi. Agassi’s father pushed him very hard at a very young age to become the best player he could be, and had him playing in high stakes matches at age nine. By age 13, Agassi went to Nick Bolletteri’s prestigious Tennis Academy in Florida. Agassi was so good that Bolletteri let him stay for free. Agassi went on to have an extremely lucrative career, becoming one of four players to win all four Grand Slam tournaments and reaching the number one ranking in the world. Today more than ever, there are resources such as individual coaches that can help make a player better at their sport. But, in order to take full advantage of these opportunities, these high school athletes need to commit to one sport full time, and they can have the best opportunity to fulfill their dream of playing at the next level.

underclassmen as well as a strong defensive unit have helped fill the void of having less talent than in previous years. “The younger players that made the team as freshmen and sophomores have tremendously stepped up,” said Cave. “Our defense, a very potent force last year, is on its way to filling [the seniors’] shoes.” Senior captain Jimmy Wyderko would agree, as he has seen a team effort in trying to make up for all of the production lost from a year ago. “I think everyone has stepped up to fill the void the seniors left,” Wyderko said. ”Everyone has really elevated their level of play. Underclassmen who didn’t play as much last year have really stepped up and shown that they are capable of making big contributions to the team.” The team may be lacking in some areas that they have not in previous years, which puts more of an emphasis on working hard in practice on a daily basis. “What we lack in skill and lacrosse IQ, is going to have to be made up in learning, hustle and hard work,” said Pohoryles. Many players have taken charge so far. However, the team has been plagued by injuries early this season. Senior Sam Quick will be carrying the load for the offense along with junior Patrick Nugent, senior Mark Murtha and sopho-

mores Bradley Murray and Zach Cooper. Defensively, seniors Toby Wu, Jon Ohlrich, Cave, Sam Jacobson and Scott Salvatore will be key to the team’s success. “Our overall goals are to be competitive in every game,” said Pohoryles. “We want to get better every day and make a strong run in the playoffs.” If WJ wants to win the division this year, the team will have to overcome some stiff competition. “There are no easy games, but I would say that Churchill, Wootton, Sherwood and Damascus will be the toughest four games we play this year,” said Pohoryles. To win these difficult games, the team needs to play smarter, control possession, win face offs and score transition goals. Along with a strong game plan that is put in place by the coaches, the players also need to out-work teams in order to be successful. “We will win these games with our intensity and grit. What we lack in natural ability we make up for in desire and physicality,” said Cave. The team also emphasizes how a strong fan turnout will help carry them to wins this season. “We hope that students come out and support us, an energetic crowd always helps the players play harder,” said Pohoryles.

c Young athletes should O play multiple sports U N T E R P O I N T By JakeWeinischke

Once upon a time, youth athletes were encouraged to play multiple sports. However, nowadays it is commonplace for kids as young as 10 to spend long hours honing their skills under the supervision of highly acclaimed coaches, to sprint from city to city in order to accommodate a busy game schedule, and to endure hours of arduous preparation, all for one sport. However, despite the devotion demonstrated by these kids, history would argue that specializing in one sport at a young age is actually unnecessary in ensuring an individual’s athletic success. Participating in a variety of sports while still developing is more beneficial to youth athletes than focusing exclusively on one. Take football hall of fame punter Ray Guy for exam-

ple. Guy played for both the football and baseball teams at the University of Southern Mississippi where he set school records as a placekicker, punter, and defensive back, en route to becoming the first pure punter to be selected in the first round of the NFL draft. Bo Jackson further fortifies this idea that specialization is unnecessary. Jackson is the only athlete to ever be selected as an all-star in two major American sports leagues, the NFL and MLB. Playing multiple sports helps develop an athlete’s physique and coordination, two qualities that overlap as necessities to succeed in all sports. Thus, it is clearly evident that specialization is not necessary in order for an athlete to thrive at an elite level. While Guy and Jackson are the most prominent of multi-sport athletes, plenty of other athletes corroborate this argument, competing in multiple sports through high school and college successfully.


Sports 12

What’s Inside

Point-Counterpoint: Is it necessary for young athletes to specialize in a particular sport.

11

Boys varsity lacrosse looks to replicate its previous success despite graduating many crucial players. APRIL 27, 2015

Pitchers at all levels follow extensive protocol to avoid prevalent arm injuries By JakeWeinischke

beginning of May. Rehabilitation time usually Baseball leagues of all calibers and age ranges from 12-18 months depending on the groups have taken precautionary measures to particular case at hand. Although pitchers make the game safer and to prepare athletes have to miss a large portion, if not an entire for the rigor of pitching. Additionally, both season, due to this injury, it tends to rejuveplayers and coaches have devised personal nate and extend the pitchers’ careers, thus it routines to increase each player’s durability has become a very popular option as opposed and to treat any damage that has already been to merely attempting to rehab the ligament done to the pitchers’ arms. The WJ team is no naturally. exception to this rule. Starting pitcher for the Washington NaArm injuries have plagued baseball players, tionals, Stephen Strasburg, is a prime examparticularly pitchers, for as long as the game ple of Tommy John surgery’s dependability. A has existed. The most common issue has provformer number one overall pick in the MLB en to be damage to the ulnar collateral ligadraft, Strasburg saw his debut season in 2010 ment in the pitcher’s throwing arm. Despite cut short, and missed the vast majority of the the prevalence of this issue, it was not until 2011 campaign when he tore his ulnar collat1974 that an efficient remedy was discovered. eral ligament. However, he managed a highly This surgery was first performed on Los Ananticipated return in 2012, striking out 197 geles Dodgers pitcher, Tommy John, hence batters over 159 1/3 innings, stamping out the procedure’s name, Tommy John Surgery. 15 wins, and making his first big-league AllIn a nutshell, the procedure replaces the damStar appearance. aged ulnar collateral ligament in the pitcher’s Photo courtesy of Ryan Manning elbow with a ligament from elsewhere in the Senior starting pitcher, Ryan Manning exercises his arm during the offseason using Several exits down on the beltway, the Baltimore Orioles have also dealt with the Tombody, usually the upper leg. While this viable elastic bands to increase his durability. my John surgery recovery process in recent treatment is now available, ulnar collateral “During the offseason I really like to do band work, years, overseeing the rehabilitation of top prospect, ligament damage continues to burden baseball players. which are exercises for your arm to keep it strong. right-handed starting pitcher, Dylan Bundy who went “After every game a pitcher throws [in], we always I also like to long toss so my arm is used to it come down with any injury in the summer of 2013. Bundy make sure to run and ice our arms. It keeps our arms baseball season,” said Manning. returned at the end of last season, pitching 26.1 inalive and if we don’t do it our arms will feel much Similarly, new head coach, Steve Sutherland has his nings for the Frederick Keys and posting a 4.78 ERA. [sorer] the next day,” said senior captain and starting own strategies in ensuring the wellbeing of his playNow returning for his first full season since undergopitcher Ryan Manning. ers. Sutherland is a major proponent of providing each ing the surgery, Bundy is once again trying to realize This type of maintenance is imperative to a player’s pitcher with the necessary rest to perform well and his big league potential, pitching for the Bowie Bayarm health not just over the course of the season, but safely. sox, an Orioles minor league affiliate. during the off-season as well. Just like athletes in any “We always space our pitchers out from when they As seen by Strasburg’s success and Bundy’s recovery, other sport, competitive baseball players work on throw,” said Sutherland. while Tommy John surgery may be a bump in the road strengthening their fundamentals and physical compeAdditionally, most youth leagues limit the maximum to a player’s career, increasingly efficient procedures tence during the off-season. It also serves as an oppor- amount of pitches a pitcher can throw in a single game. are continuing to minimize the overall impact arm intunity for players to increase their arm strength and While no such limit exists in high school competition, juries have on the game. stamina. Sutherland is still cognizant of his players’ pitch counts and does not let them exceed a certain number. “We never let a pitcher go over the 100 [pitch] mark,” said Sutherland. Despite this, WJ pitchers rarely near the 100-pitch mark, as fatigue and a subsequent drop in performance often causes them to be pulled before that point. “Typically, when we see the arm start slowing down and the other team is hitting the pitching well, it is around the 70-pitch mark so they don’t often times go too much past that really,” said Sutherland. While precaution has increased throughout the baseball world, the rate of Tommy John Surgery patients has actually increased on baseball’s biggest stage, the major leagues. According to ESPN, a toPhoto courtesy Emily Horick Photo from Flickr, Scott Ableman Junior Noah Meyers follows through after throwing tal of 14 major league pitchers under- Nationals starting pitcher, Stephen Strasburg needed Tommy John Surgery to a pitch during a game against The Heights. went the procedure last season by the repair his hurt arm earlier in his career.


Harvard on the Pike

mm/dd/yyyy

Volume Cederbaum, Issue Herberg

1600 Pennsylvania Ave, Washington, DC

New “Glass Ceiling” policies implemented

By Selma Stearns

According to the Institute for Women’s Policy Research (IWPR), American women make on average 78 percent of men's earnings. In order to prepare female students for the harsh realities of the real workforce, MCPS introduced a new grading system with which female students will receive 78 percent of the grades they should be earning in all classes. The policy is part of the larger Glass Ceiling program being adopted by MCPS. Senior Miranda Mlilo is a female student who is acclimating to the new system. She formerly had a 91 percent in AP English Literature, but on her transcript it will now say 71 percent. This brings her grade down from an A to a C, but unfortunately for Mlilo, it’s her own fault for being a woman and living in America. Male student senior Pat Riarchy also had a 91 percent in AP Literature, and his grade will remain an A. “At first I was upset about the system, but then I realized that my hard work in AP Lit just doesn’t mean as much as a boy’s,” said Mlilo. Female students will still be expected to put in the same amount of work as before, except now when grades are calculated for girls their true score will be multiplied by .78 and the adjusted grade will be entered into Edline. Riarchy said the system is fair and reasonable because men are, after all, the stronger gender. Why else would there be fewer women running large companies than men named John? Clearly, men are superior because of their larger brains, physical strength and overall superiority. “Women couldn’t even vote in this country until 95

By Izzy Salant

Ah, the end of April; the time of year when April showers are ending and May flowers are just starting to bloom. It is the time of year when high school spirits are either lifted or crushed to smithereens because it’s prom season.Yes it’s that wonderful time of year… BUT NONE OF THAT MATTERS BECAUSE WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE! That’s right, there is no doubt about it; everyone is going to die. Me, you, me, myself and I and most importantly, me, we are going to die! Recently, Jake Goodman, of “Jake’s Weather Blog,” predicted the apocalypse. “Good morning WJ,” the report began, “the weather for next week doesn’t look good. On Tuesday we can expect to see four horsemen running rampant through the streets, followed by a meteor taking out the entire continent of Australia. On Wednesday, be prepared for a high temperature of -5 C because Yellowstone’s super volcano is going to erupt, sending the United States and Canada into a 200 year volcanic winter. Thursday, there is a 100 percent chance of Satan. Friday there will be several nine magnitude earthquakes,

years ago, so why do they think that they deserve the same grades I do?” said Riarchy. Emily Lavine was the president of WJ’s Feminism Club, but the club disbanded after the members realized that the percentage of men’s wages that women earn have only gone up 15 percent in the last 60 years. “All students should feel welcome at meetings of the newly founded MeGraphic and photos by Selma Stearns ninism club, where The rule took immediate affect in the school, and this is what it looks like put into practice.While Mliwe will discuss how lo got the same amount of answers right as Riarchy, she only deserves 78 percent because she’s female. Other Glass Ceiling programs include the requiredifficult it is for men to be outlived by women by an ment for female students to only be the presidents of average of five years,” said Lavine. “Women should re4.1 percent of WJ clubs, mimicking the real-life staally be forced to pay for those extra years of life.” tistics about women CEOs in the U.S. Mlilo was a member of Feminism Club and now A WJ administrator who wished to remain anonyembraces the message of the Meninism Club. mous stated that the purpose of high school is to get “I thought feminism had a really good message, but now I realize that feminists are just crazy harpies who children ready for the real world, so it’s important to want all men in America to be killed,” said Mlilo. “I keep female students’ expectations in check. “We’re really trying to implement a thick glass ceiljust can’t imagine myself living in a country where a ing at WJ,” said the administrator. “Next year we’ll enwoman is in the White House. How do we know she sure that the only candidates able to run for SGA are won’t be on her period 365 days a year?” white Protestant males.” nal mantra of “I told you so, I told you so” while sticking out their tongues and making obscene hand gestures. “They said I was crazy, they said it was stupid to sell my house and move down underground. They all laughed at me, well who’s laughing now?” proclaimed “Doomsday Preppers” star and math teacher Mary Lafratta. In response to this report, Congress immediately launched an initiative to help themselves… I mean the American people and combat the apocalypse, using no other information except Jake’s Weather Blog. Graphic by Selma Stearns. Jake’s Weather Blog logo courtesy of Jake’s Weather Blog Congress was set to vote on the initiative causing massive destruction and multiple tsunamis. If last Monday, but due to Senate filibustering and deyou have loved ones in South America, tell them to bate, the initiative now just combats Obamacare. Meanwhile, Lafratta watched Toy Story 3 and remove to a new continent, except for Australia, that place will be a desolate wasteland. And finally, if you membered the importance of friendship, so now she is are still alive for the weekend, you can expect a clear opening up her secret bomb shelter at 1600 Pennsylsunny day with highs and lows in the 70s. Remember vania Avenue to those who want to survive the apocato download the app, and have a great day WJ. Back to lypse. All she requires is two sacks of gold, some sushi, a signed statement saying you will live and obey her you guys.” The show ended there because the anchors had al- and, of course, a five on the AP Statistics exam. “I don’t think the requirements are too much,” she ready fled to Fiji halfway through the report. Immediately following the morning announce- said. “I think it’s a small price to pay to survive the end ments, Principal Jennifer Baker addressed the school. of days.” Others like Lafratta are opening their homes and “Good morning staff, students and Mrs. Reynolds. I hearts to desperate souls who have no family to take understand your concern, but this apocalypse has been care of them in this time of need. planned since June of 2014. Parents, staff and faculty A release from the president states that if anyone surhave all been a part of a committee to make sure this program runs smoothly,” she said, right before she was vives the apocalypse, a huge event, entitled, “Apocachella,” will be held on the National Mall at 8 p.m., three struck by lightning… three times. Once Jake’s report reached national news, people Tuesdays from now. *This article was written by a ghost writer. A liteverywhere frantically ran into the streets, resulting in riots and multiple casualties. Meanwhile, people who eral ghost; Izzy died during the preemptive apocalypse had prepared for this their entire lives replaced their lighting strike. usual fire and brimstone ramblings with a commu-


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98 Percent Rule is revolutionizing MCPS By Joshua Lang After so many snow days this year, students have been facing serious challenges while trying to keep their grades up. It is becoming such an issue that MCPS’ reputation has been seriously blemished. As a way to boost the county’s standing in the nation, MCPS is introducing a new rule for grades; the 98 percent rule. Instead of the current 50 percent rule, where the lowest grade a student can earn on an assignment is 50 percent if work is turned in, the rule will now be changed to 98 percent. If a student gets anything lower than a 98 percent, their grade will automatically be bumped up to a 98 percent. Before instituting such a major change, MCPS took a poll in local high schools to see if such a rule would be well received. For the first time in MCPS history, they gained a whopping approval rate of 99.9 percent of students who said they want this rule to be established immediately. The other 0.1 percent were some failing upper classmen looking to make the rule 100 percent, so they would be accepted to better colleges. The Associated Press (AP) reported that Princeton University, the top college in the nation, is so impressed with MCPS students that it is increasing its 7.4 percent acceptance rate to at least a 50 percent to accommodate the large number of outstanding students in MCPS. Instead of simply applying to colleges, colleges are sending scholarships to MCPS students, begging them to attend their schools. The AP reported in early April that the 98 percent rule has boosted MCPS to the top in the nation with the most graduates per capita. “The results are truly astonishing,” said Principal Jennifer Baker. “Seeing so many Ivy League schools

begging our students to enroll brings a tear to my eye. I have never seen students and their families so happy.” MCPS has set the new standard for the U.S. People from all over the country are flocking to MCPS, desperately trying to find a house so that their children can attend an MCPS school. Local realtors are scrambling to sell the last few houses available in Montgomery County. With such a shortage of homes available, the market values of a typical apartment have moved up into the millions. The population in Montgomery County has grown by 21 percent within the last month since the rule started. Local private schools such as Sidwell Friends School, Bullis School, Charles E. Smith Jewish Day School and St. John’s Episcopal School have seen a decrease in enrollment by 80 percent. Many parents have decided that paying high prices for private school is not worth it when public schools are sending more students to college. As predicted, students are ecstatic about the 98 percent rule. “I can’t believe it,” said junior Nathan Rosenberg. “I’m still a junior, yet Harvard and Yale have already offered me full scholarships. They included room and board to try to get me to commit early.” The 98 percent rule has revolutionized the school system in Montgomery County and as a result, MCPS has patented, trademarked and engraved the rule in stone tablets so that no one else in the world can use it. There is a report going around that former superintendent Joshua Starr, is begging MCPS to take him back, but they aren’t budging. It would appear that the 98 percent rule has changed the school system forever.

SEPTEMBER 2, 1945

LETTER FROM THE EDITORS

Yo readers, what’s crackin?

So for this issue we were too lazy to read the rest of the paper so instead of previewing what will be inside we will just entertain you with some wonderful puns! The person who invented the door knock won the No-bell prize. I couldn’t work out how to fasten my seatbelt. Then it clicked. Never trust atoms, they make up everything. Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth, then it just becomes a soap opera. To the guy who invented Zero: Thanks for nothing! If Apple made a car, would it have Windows? When William joined the army he disliked the phrase ‘fire at will’. Why does Peter Pan always fly? Because he Neverlands. What do you call a fake noodle? an IMPASTA! I always take a second pair of pants when I go golfing... in case I get a hole in one.

We hope you enjoyed this as much as we did…. Well Ben did. Enjoy the rest of the paper!

Happy reading, Your 2014-2015 Editor in Chief, Benjamin David Resnick Audrey Marek and Selma Stearns do not approve of this letter and therefore are not signing off on it.

Mr. K, Mr. K switch places for a day By Kara Gordon

In an effort to further engage students this spring, social studies teacher Rainer Kulenkampff and music teacher Chris Kosmaceski have decided to switch places for the day. With the two Mr. K’s in each other’s places it was hard for the student body to even notice. The teachers were confident that they would make it through the day successfully. “I’ve listened to a lot of classical music over the years so I don’t think conducting will be too difficult; the kids seem to know what they’re doing,” said Kulenkampff. Kulenkampff was tasked with instructing Concert Band, AP Music Theory, Symphonic Orchestra and Jazz Band. He had to deal with all of Kosmaceski’s daily tasks including conducting, tuning and dealing with

malfunctioning instruments. Kulenkampff tried to do what he knows best and turned his music teaching into a Pennies for Patients event. Initially, he was out of his element in the music wing, but he quickly began to feel at home when he thought of the idea to have the music classes play for charity donations. Nearby classes were ushered in to listen to the performance and encouraged to donate to the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. Although different than his average day, Kulemkampff had fun with the swap and made the most of it. “Leadership should definitely look into a music fundraiser for next year. It was so entertaining and one of my best ideas yet,” said Kulenkampff. The students didn’t really seem to notice all of the changes, however. When asked about their time with Mr. K, many students seemed to think Kosmaceski was in class teaching as per usual. Junior Josh Beede was thoroughly confused about the whole swap. “Mr. Kulenkampff was teaching our class today? When I heard people saying Mr. K I just assumed it was a normal day with our normal teacher,” said Beede. On the other side of the school, Kosmaceski was taking over Kulemkampff’s position as a Social Studies teacher and Leadership class advisor. He put down his baton, sheet music and tuner for the day and picked up his map and textbook. Mr. K modified the typical Model United Nations class period and decided to have the student’s research the music styles of the countries they represented in class. Politics and debate aside, students took a day to learn about unique

rhythms, melodies and harmonies of various nations that are represented in the UN Assembly. Senior Krista Smith-Hanke was surprised by how much she enjoyed the change in lesson plans. “I’ve never really thought of myself as a music person, but learning about the difference in music styles around the world was so interesting,” said Smith-Hanke. Both Mr. Ks were happy to switch for the day and show different parts of the school a taste of their areas of specialty. “I had a great time teaching students who wouldn’t normally make it down to the music wing a thing or two,” said Kosmaceski. Except for Smith-Hanke, the switch went completely unnoticed.

¿Mr. K? This is Mr. K.

Photo by Janey Tietz

This is also Mr. K.

Photo courtesy of Christopher Kosmaceski


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PARENTS JUST DON’T

UNDERSTAND

By Charlie Kanter

I have just had enough of my parents. They control every aspect of my life, and I just cannot take it anymore. Some people groan about being forced to skip parties or go to bed early, but if they heard about the kind of torment that my parents put me through, they wouldn’t be so quick to complain. My mom packs my lunch every single day – she enjoys torturing me with Nutella, Cheetos and strawberry GoGurt. Revolting! When she isn’t looking, I am usually able to slip in some whole wheat bread, tofu and maybe a floret of raw cauliflower. Some days I am not so lucky. Occasionally she tells me, “Skip school if you want, it does not really matter.”

La opinión de la Catch

Good try Mom, but I’m not falling for that one again. Better start showing up early to class just to make sure I don’t even come remotely close to listening to what she says. And you know what? I’m bringing home straight A’s this semester. That’ll show her! The nights my parents go out drinking and partying and leave me home alone are such a big relief. Finally, my chance to get a good night’s sleep. They usually keep me up every night to watch movies and eat ice cream, but when they are gone I secretly go to bed three hours early. They never find out. What is worse is when they drink alcohol at home. They always offer me some. “Try it,” they say, “you might like it.” Get that crap out of my face. What

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gives them the right to do that to me? I am 17 years old. Have you ever heard of a guy my age drinking a beer? I certainly have not. I will not have alcohol until I’m married, maybe not until after my first child has graduated elementary school. That’s how it should be. Dad says “Smoking marijuana every once in a while can actually be healthy.” Smoking marijuana my asymptote. You’re not fooling anyone, idiot. I am my own person; I can make my own decisions in life. Dad made spinach illegal in our house. You know what, “Dad”, you can’t stop me from eating it with my friends – it’s just a plant. Legalize it! Parents just do not know what it is like to be a teen these days – things have changed. Why can’t they?

On April 1, 2015, it was announced that history teacher Jeremy Butler joined the popular boy band “One Direction” to replace lost member Zayn Malik. As a whole, the Pitch has no opinion on this. Sure, we think it is a little weird, but we are not here to judge. Overall, we are pretty apathetic.You do you Mr. Butler. You do you.

SUPREME LEADERS Audrey “No More Puns” Marek Ben “The Dad” Resnick Selmao Stearns Amanda “Is Not” Gross Marissa Nutella BRIDE Sylvie “None of You Are Coming to My Wedding” Ellen NÜSE Izzy “Les Iz” Salant Gideon “Real News Editor” Epstein Anna “Still Didn’t Sign Up for This” Hovey Kelly “Insider Info” Chartrand FORMERLY KNOWN AS EDITORIAL

Nick-Name Williamson Charlie “Daddy’s Boy” Resnick Zoey “The Pen” Becker MISC. Anja “Not an APEXer” Shahu Kevin “Anivia is Bae” Lu Leila “Coffee Run?” Siegel

SO FLUFFY I CAN’T EVEN Annika “BuzzFeed” La Vina MK “Kawaii” Greening Evan “Can’t Hold a Candle to Me” Candelmo Zack “Z-Money” Shapiro BALLS Jake Win-ish-key Patrick Weinischke Kevin “Speedy” O’Leary Grant Revaew NIT-PICKERS Suejean “Can I Go to Your Wedding?” Han Daniel Gordon CARTON MAKER Steven “The Funk Alavi” Judge TWITTERS Shashank “In Ma Face” Narayan Gideon “Real Business Manager” Epstein MINIONS Emma “4Years4Nothing” Higgins Allie “Big Hair” Miljanic Joshua “Foreign Language” Lang Daniel Gordon Meg “1/3 of Meme Team” Tamara Bradley “Star of S*T*A*G*E” Stein Daniel “Coffee Run?” Leonard Iris (Serbian last name) Kara “Fudgeboy” Gordon Kathryn Van SPIKEsdalen Suejean “Can I Go to Your Wedding?” Han Janye Test

Grumpy Gideon

Grumpy graphic by Selma Stearns

AWARDS Least improved

#1 Paper in America according to Nick’s Mom Cartoon by Steven Judge

The obsessive sand gardener comes face-to-face with his wildest dream... and his worst nightmare.

Best Newspaper atWJ Worst Newspaper atWJ



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Throughout the airport, people were absolutely silent. Everyone carried advanced smartphones with paired smart-glasses, such as Google Glass, and they all used one universal messaging app. Along with sending messages to their existing contacts, people use the app to communicate with strangers. All anyone had to do was make eye contact and hit send, and their Emoji message would show up on the recipient’s eye screen. The residents of Emojiland have come from all ove r

tice test, I realized that I had some serious studying to do,” said junior Tony Coffey. Colleges have started to consider the Emoji Subject Test as an important indicator of a student’s communication ability and digital awareness. Stanford’s Dean of Admissions recently said, “We must ensure that tomorrow’s leaders are well-versed in modern communication skills and have the aptitude to utilize universal and crosscultural symbols.”

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The use of smiley faces and other pictorial characters over text messaging has been around for some time now, but today their use is so widespread it has developed into a language of its own. Every smartphone and online keyboard now contains a diverse library of “Emoji”. With so many to choose from, each one conveying a specific idea, emotion or thing, Emojis are often used in lieu of words to communicate over text. But one group of people has decided to take this form of communication to the extreme, and use it as their primary form of language. They call themselves “ ”. What began as a wacky social experiment in San Francisco has now developed into a 100,000 person independent colony that has taken root on a small island in the South Pacific, now dubbed as Emojiland. In Emojiland, everything is written or communicated through Emojis. Personal conversations, advertising, signs for shops, restaurants and venues, even political campaigns, are all achieved through a string of these small cartoonish images. Senior Julianna Lebron visited Emojiland over spring break. “When I landed at the Emojiland Airport, I was immediately struck by the pervasive use of the Emoji,” said Lebron. “An airport security poster stated: . I can only assume that this is telling people to call the police if they see an unattended bag.” Lebron said there was bright neon sign over the airport bar that read:

the world. Even though they speak different languages, Emojis serve as universal symbols of emotions and objects. A person from Japan can easily communicate with someone from Germany through Emojis. However, a disadvantage to speaking solely with Emojis is that Emojis reduce everything to very simplistic terms and are individuals are only capable of conveying the most basic emotions and ideas. Recently, some young residents of Emojiland began protesting that they were being discriminated against, as their language was not available on any standardized tests. Once the College Board managed to decode their petition, which was both written and signed using Emojis, they took immediate action. Come 2016, students all around the world will be able to have the opportunity to take an Emoji SAT II Subject Test. On this 60-minute, all multiple choice test, students will have to identify and categorize Emoji characters, analyze and interpret Emoji text, and translate English sentences into Emoji phrases. SAT prep institutions have already begun offering tutoring opportunities for students who plan to take the Emoji SAT II Subject Test. “I just started taking prep courses for the Emoji Subject Test. I decided to take it because I thought it would be really easy, but after taking a prac-

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WELCOME TO EMOJILAND

3. What seems for the brunet 2. This dialogue is most likely   a.  She doe    to look between…   a. Mother and daughter   b.  She’s ha   c.  She’s cu   b. Father and son    not the   c. Sister and sister   d. She’s too   d. Father and daughter    prom


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New SAT Subject Test Think you can pass the new SAT? Take these new practice questions and find out!

Directions: Each of the questions below is followed by five suggested answers. Select the one that is best in each case and then fill in the correponding oval on the answer sheet.

1.

c.

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the Emoji paragraph below

to be the biggest concern tte woman? esn’t want the blonde ugly at prom aving financial issues urious whether or blonde has a date o busy herself to go to

Answer Key 1. The correct answer is D. In the first portion of the phrase, it is clear that the boy and girl love each other. However, the second portion indicates that the girl broke up with the boy because the girl emoji came before the boy emoji. This eliminates answer choices A and B. Although a person may feel sick due to a bad break up, D would be the more appropriate answer because it is evident that he would feel sadness.

2. The correct answer is A. Given that the two emojis involved in the dialogue are women, B and D are automatically eliminated. After further analysis, one can conclude that the best answer choice is A because it’s not likely for a girl to be financially dependent on her sister. 3. The correct answer is B. We have already concluded that the brunette woman is the mother and that the blonde woman is the daughter. There is no evidence of the mother’s concern for her daughter’s looks, so A can be eliminated. C also cannot be correct because nowhere in the text did it even mention a boy. Although the mother does not have much time because she works two jobs, one can conclude that the mother shows no interest in going to the prom herself. Instead, she is mainly concerned about money and how she will be able to pay for her daughter’s spending.


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As the first issue back from break, The Catch asked teachers “What did you do over spring break?”

PRIMAVERA, 2015

The Catch polled 50 WJ students at random on the following questions:

Melanie MacFadden

Did you go see “Shrek the Musical”?

“I got as far away as possible from anything involving the words ‘student’ or ‘college board.’”

Duh, are ogres like onions?.........................100%

English

Photo by Audrey Marek

Christopher Merrill Social Studies

How often do you read “The Pitch”?

“Anything but skiing. One concussion is enough for this year.”

Can’t live without it......................The Pitch Staff What’s the Pitch?...........................Everyone Else Photo by Charlie Kanter

Lucia Liang

Foreign Language “I was chillin’ out with some homies, makin’ bank.”

What is your preparation strategy for your AP tests? Curl up and sob profusely.............................112%

Photo by Charlie Kanter

Mike Laukaitis

Cheat off the kid next to me.................................... Twenty Percent% (according to the kid next to me)

Mathematics

“I taught a seminar for other teachers on the proper use of the phrase ‘Holy Toledo,’ and how to get your co-teachers to write your quizzes for you.”

Bribe the College Board.........................$$$$$% Actually study..........................................3.14159% Photo by Charlie Kanter

By Meg Tamara

New AP test payment methods sever the cost of testing

With the rising cost of AP exams and SAT registration, parents are struggling to pay testing fees. A group of PTSA soccer moms, notorious for having a lot of free time, spent their time between dropping their kids at soccer practice and couponing to start an initiative to lower the cost of the tests administered by the College Board. After months of negotiation, the moms and the College Board came to a compromise: if parents are unable to pay the testing fee, students can offer

limbs as payment. “With careful consideration, the Board and I find it appropriate that students may donate limbs to pay for standardized tests,” said a representative of the College Board, stressing that the Board fully supports this method of payment, as long as the process of removing limbs is done safely and ethically. It was later revealed that he had no connection to the College Board, and would like student limbs to sell on the black market. “After considering the risks and the benefits, I have decided to sever my arm

for the College Board. In terms of long term investments, possibly earning a year of college credit is worth the lifelong commitment,” said junior Lauren Perry. Other students have followed in similar footsteps, and have cut off their feet. “The College Board has already taken away my free time and sanity, what’s the harm in losing something else as long as there is a chance I might earn college credit?” said senior Clara Reed. “I mean, there is a chance the school I’m applying for might not even accept my AP test

scores for college credit, but who cares? It shows dedication.” Though the procedure may seem risky, the College Board guarantees student safety, offering amputations at no cost with a mortality rate as low as 40 percent. The only question that remains is what does the Board plan to do with all the extra limbs? They certainly have their hands full.


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SOMETIME IN SPRING, 2015

FASHION AND OTHER STUFF

History teacher Jeremy Butler joins One Direction

By MK Greening Following the outcry after Zayn Malik’s departure from the British boy band One Direction, their Londonbased record label, SyCo, has expressed interest in finding a replacement. Their search moved to the States after famous talent show judge Simon Cowell humiliated everyone who tried out in Britain, and after a long two weeks, the search finally came to a close when they found history teacher Jeremy Butler. Cowell discovered Butler while driving down Old Georgetown Road on his way to meet President Obama. He pulled up next to Butler’s car in his limo and heard Butler singing along to “Uptown Funk” by Bruno Mars. Cowell, impressed by Butler’s vocal tone and range, stopped him and briefed him on his search for a new band member. After testing his dancing skills by making him jump around on the sidewalk (a dance move made popular by 1D), Cowell suggested that Butler join One Direction. “When I saw him, I knew he was the one. He has that raw natural talent,” said Cowell.

At first, Butler did not think he had enough talent, but Cowell convinced him to look to the school community for guidance. To prepare for the role, Butler sat in on some of his wife’s chorus classes. “Attending Pop Fly really improved my dancing, but I think bringing the Madrigals’ Renaissance singing style into pop music would add a different flavor to the band,” said Butler. Over spring break, Butler flew out to London to meet with the rest of One Direction, where they planned their upcoming tour and threw some song ideas around. The band agreed that Butler would have the majority of the solos in a new single, which sources say is related to history. Butler would not reveal the name of the new song or the content, but he did speak about the upcoming tour. “I think the new posters look great and natural, and they really set up my band persona,” said Butler. Butler also explained that the addition of a new member was originally supposed to be kept a secret to be revealed at the first show in Cardiff, Wales. “We tried to keep this out of mass

media for the longest time, but fan theories on Twitter and Tumblr about who the new tall red-headed man was forced us to go to the press and officially announce my new position,” he said.

One Direction’s tour comes stateside in July, and WJ students will have a five percent discount on tickets. Butler hopes everyone will come and support his new career decision.

Photo from www.flickr.com and MK Greening, graphic by Annika La Vina

The new One Direction poster features Jeremy Butler alongside his new bandmates.

Tracking teachers on Tinder By IrisVukmanovic

Joanne, 22

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Joanne Reynolds, 22

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0 miles away active 1 day ago

About Joanne ~Oh it’s a brave new world on tinder~ Looking for a friend to analyze the Odyssey with over some vanilla frappuccinos. Advanced diction and hipster glasses are always a plus. If you bring me brownies you can be my BFF (or whatever it is that you kids call it these days.) In my free time I grade papers, watch Downton Abbey and eat Cheetos.

Last Tuesday, while on social media dating site Tinder, a student found something very disconcerting. It appears that some of your favorite WJ teachers are actively using the site. We found some of their profiles and published them here for your enjoyment (and their embarassment).

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Steve, 25

Steve Miller, 25

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0 miles away active 3 days ago

About Steve “I love you ceteris paribus” Economics and Government teacher - 2 hip 2 function. Hit me up and we can go get white fish salads at Ize’s together.


BALLS

Inside What? New Emojis on the SAT!!! Ben makes some puns and teachers join Tinder. Have fun readers!

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Male poms win county championship

By Janey Tietz

The stands were packed last Wednesday night at Quince Orchard High School when male poms made history by placing first at the Montgomery County Championship. The competition was fierce. It seemed as though there was no possible way WJ’s talented squad could win, but after Churchill’s disastrous routine, the team found new motivation. Their goal became to just beat Churchill. The boys, performing their routine to a mix of many of today’s popular songs such as BO$$ by Fifth Harmony and Pocket Full of Sunshine by Natasha Bedingfield, shocked spectators due to their surprising amount of talent, and lack of Spandex underneath their uniforms. Their unorthodox, revolutionary finale, consisting of SGA President Justin New leading the stadium in a chant of “SENIORS 1-5!” and a wave around the stands, made the routine an even more entertaining experience. “Even though the routines are always so fantastic, I never really feel connected to them,” said junior Elon Skolnik. “The addition of the wave really made me feel as though I was a part of the whole experience- that they really cared about me.” The infectious energy and charisma of their performance truly merited the perfect scores from the panel

of various celebrity judges such as Beyonce, Dr.Phil and Snoop Dogg. Surprisingly before this year, a completely male poms squad had never even considered entering a county championship, but with the support of this year’s girls teams captains seniors Daniela Otarola, Sammy Siegel and Rachel Allen, the team felt as though they really had a shot at beating Churchill. What seemed to be an almost impossible goal was accomplished through weeks of rigorous daily practices after school in the WJ cafeteria. “It wasn’t easy to get a group of uncoordinated boys to learn our routines, but in the end I Photo Courtesy of Dani Otarola think it really came together,” The male poms team poses with their coaches after their first performance of the season. said Siegel. Thankfully, in case you missed the County Champi- lunch, with a meet and greet session afterwards for an onship, this is not the last opportunity to witness these additional $8, where you can not only meet the boys, boys grace the stage. Due to overwhelming demand, but also take pictures and maybe even get one of them they will be performing their legendary routine in the to sign a phone case. WJ gymnasium on May 5 for $5 at the door during

New study says helmets are too safe By Patrick Jorling

ing always get the biggest roars from fans, especially if it means that their favorite team has a better chance of winning. It’s curious as to why these professional leagues are moving away from the reliable business model established by the Romans centuries ago. The Roman people would flock to the coliseum in droves to watch gladiators go head to head and fight to the death. So, why would sports try to be safer now? Fans are wondering that as well. “I cannot believe that my favorite players have to wear helmets to protect themselves,” a die-hard college football fan said while tailgating in an empty parking lot seven hours before a recent game. “If they were true warriors who would sacrifice anything to help the team win, then they would get rid of the helmets. A true test of a player’s character comes when they don’t have any protection.” This lack of danger in sports caused by the wearing of helmets has also been reflected by hockey fans, who consider their favorite players to be some of the toughest in all of sports. “It’s ridiculous that management is making the players protect themselves,” a Toronto Maple Leafs fan and former hockey player said while standing outside of the stadium four hours before it opened. “Back in my day, players showed true grit and toughness Photo from Flickr, Hans Splinter while skating without helmets. Two gladiators make ridiculous facial expressions at one another, something helmets And I don’t think anyone died beprevent athletes from doing. In recent decades, professional and school sports leagues have made more of an effort to protect athletes with the use of helmets. The leagues claim that head injuries may be damaging to players’ health due to concussions causing long term brain injuries. But, the leagues have faced backlash from many of their supporters because they don’t get to see these elite athletes bash their heads together with extreme force for the sake of their favorite teams winning the game. The leagues seem to be ignoring the extreme entertainment that people find in athletes putting their lives on the line. Fast paced collisions and head bash-

cause of it, at least I don’t remember.” Baseball fans also find it ridiculous that players have to wear helmets. “If Babe Ruth and Lou Gehrig, some true ballplayers, did it without helmets, the players today can too,” said one fan seen scoring by hand at a recent game. “It’s not like pitchers are going to throw at batters’ heads anyway, because nowadays they’re too scared.” Despite all of the outrage from fan bases of all sports, attendance continues to stay high. Why, some might ask? Well, no matter what happens to the sport, the fans will still show up and support their team, as long as it helps them win.

Photo from Flickr, Royal Navy Media Archive

Now here is a great sport where players bash their heads together without helmets.


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