Metro Spirit 03.20.2003

20-26

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Volume

14

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Issue

32

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www.metspirit.com

AR

M EN T

TH

March

N

E

TROPOLIT ME A

TS IN , IS TA R SUE S & ENTE

AUGUSTA IN THE

CROSSFIRE

BY STACEY EIDSON

2 M E T R O S P I R I T M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

Like all Volvo’s, the S60 sports sedan comes equipped with safety features some other cars don’t even offer as options. Things like full-length Inflatable Side Curtains, a Whiplash Protection Seating System and automatic pretensioners in all five seats.

We can also safely say the Volvo S60 is more than equipped to hold its own when it comes to performance and handling. Thanks to its sport-tuned suspension, wide, corner-gripping stance and 4-channel antilock brakes. It’s made for corners. And whatever may be lurking around them. Visit your local Volvo retailer or volvocars.com.

THE 2003 VOLVO S60. STARTING FROM $26,370. MODEL SHOWN $27,315.* *MSRP of the 2003 Volvo 560A as shown with optional equipment is $27,315. Price does not include destination charge, tax and title. See your authorized Volvo retailer for complete details. ©2002 Volvo Cars of North America, LLC. Volvo for life™ is a registered trademark of Volvo. Always wear your seat belt.

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Contents

3

The Metropolitan Spirit

M A R C H

2 0 - 2 6

•

F R E E

W E E K L Y

•

Augusta Opera Presents

Puccini’s

TOSCA

M E T S P I R I T . C O M

• • •

ON THE COVER

Augusta in the Crossfire By Stacey Eidson ......................................................14 Cover Design: Natalie Holle Cover Photo: Brian Neill

Imperial Theater

March 20 & 22 at 7:30pm March 23 at 3pm Student & Senior Discounts available www.AugustaOpera.com

Ticket Hotline:

826-4710 Prom Tuxedo Rentals

$85

Opinion

M E N S W E A R

4432 Washington Road, Evans (across from Evans Diner) 706-228-1661 #7 Old Waynesborough, Waynesboro 706-554-3352

Arts

Japonisme Exhibit on the Loose at Morris Museum ........................................................................24 Russell Brown on Stage-Kissing and Cursing for Art ............................................................................26 Dancers To Be Slain in the Spirit March 27 ..............28

Events

8 Days a Week .............................................................53

for basic tuxedo

Barksdales

Whine Line ......................................................................4 Words ...............................................................................4 Thumbs Up, Thumbs Down ...........................................4 Suburban Torture ............................................................6 Letter to the Editor .........................................................8 Austin Rhodes ...............................................................10

Production Sponsor

Supporting Sponsors: CSRA Business Monthly, Azalea Inn, Cellular One, Georgia Council for the Arts, Greater Augusta Arts Council, RedWolf, Inc., Marriott Hotel, Westinghouse Safety Management Solutions LLC

HEAT + MASSAGE + RECLINE =ZZZZZ Benna’s Incandescent Tunes To Grace Capri Cinema...............23

Music

Benna’s Incandescent Tunes To Grace Capri Cinema ..........................................................................23 Garden City Music Fest This Weekend .......................66 Music By Turner ............................................................68 Music Minis ...................................................................69 Night Life .......................................................................70

Stuff News of the Weird ........................................................72 Brezsny's Free Will Astrology ......................................73 New York Times Crossword Puzzle ............................73 Amy Alkon: The Advice Goddess ................................74 Classifieds .....................................................................75 Date Maker ...................................................................76 Automotive Classifieds ................................................78

EDITOR & PUBLISHER David Vantrease ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Rhonda Jones STAFF WRITERS Stacey Eidson, Brian Neill ADVERTISING SALES MANAGER Joe White ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Kriste Lindler, Jennifer H. Mar tin PRODUCTION MANAGER Joe Smith GR APHIC ARTISTS Stephanie Carroll, Natalie Holle ASSISTANT TO THE PUBLISHER Meli Gurley RECEPTIONIST/CLASSIFIED COORDINATOR Sharon King ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT ASSISTANT Lisa Jordan CIRCULATION DIRECTOR Meli Gurley SENIOR MUSIC CONTRIBUTOR Ed Turner CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Chuck Shepherd, Rob Brezsny, Austin Rhodes, Amy Alkon, Rachel Deahl CARTOONISTS Tom Tomorrow, Julie Larson

4M2-343s

Cinema

Movie Listings .............................................................60 Review: 2002 Oscar Roundup ....................................62 Review: “Dreamcatcher” .............................................63 Review: “Willard” .........................................................64 Movie Clock ..................................................................65

WE MAKE THE ROOMS THAT MAKE A HOME 3511 Wrightsboro Road

(3/10 mile west of Augusta Mall)

THE METROPOLITAN SPIRIT is a free newspaper published weekly on Thursday, 52 weeks of the year. Editorial coverage includes ar ts, local issues, news, enter tainment, people, places and events. In our paper appear views from across the political and social spectrum. The views do not necessarily represent the views of the publishers. Visit us at www.metspirit.com. Copyright © The Metropolitan Spirit Inc. Reproduction or use without permission is prohibited.

Phone: (706) 738-1142 Fax: (706) 733-6663 E-mail: spirit@metspirit.com Letters to the Editor: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, Ga. 30914-3809

Torch award Winner

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M A R

2 0 0 3

FEATURES

By Brian Neill ................................18

S P I R I T

2 0

Tickets $12 - $40

The Race for Sheriff: Q&A With Rowland and Hunt

M E T R O

4 M E T R O S P I R I T M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

Whine Line S

ome choice Gov. Perdue is offering us: (1) the friendlier cracker flag of 1956, or (2) the ugly, racist flag designed in 1957 by angry crackers and Klansmen.

Why not a statewide flag design contest?

are using Rhodes as a mic-piece until they have no further use for him.

Columbia County Commission Chair, Ron “Double” Cross raised over $55,000 to run for his position. He spent over $53,000 including $9,000 of his own money, and the job only pays $12,000 per year. Why would anyone spend like that?

Does he think it will give him a leg up on commercial construction jobs? Does he have a super ego to be fed? I would vote "Yes" to both of the above!

How in the world does someone drive when they have a cell phone in one hand and a cigarette in the other? What do you drive with, your feet? People need to be more responsible and respectful of others.

Put the phone down and wait until you are at a safe place before using it.

Congressman Charlie Norwood certainly is a spineless character. He first put together a team to rid Columbia County of its black, conservative Republican chairman; then he failed to be present when the vote was taken. And that's the kind of leadership we elected to the U.S. House of Representatives — it's enough to make one sick!

Rep. Burmeister, cut the whining and get on with governing. I lost all respect for you when you changed your voter registration to a place that you do not live in. You are no better than a yellowdog Democrat.

Sometimes we all fail to look at the sunny side of life. Just think: We won't have to take the kids to Riverbanks Zoo during Masters week. We can drive them by the entrance to Magnolia Lane to see all the wild animals.

Former Columbia County Republican Chairman Alvin Starks is one of the most honest people you will ever meet and one who’ll run things by the books. For those reasons alone, there is little wonder why Charlie Norwood, Joey Brush, Ben Harbin, Barry Fleming and Ron Cross lead the fight to drum Starks out of the chair position. Columbia County politics is starting to look and smell like Richmond County politics!

I agree with the whiner who’d written in about Austin Rhodes. Whines about him need to be banned. The whines are just repeating themselves. Austin Rhodes is on the air 15 hours a week, plus he has a weekly column in your newspaper.

Augusta is in horrible shape. That is what we need to continue venting about. Limit this guy to one or two whines a week. Do it for the people who are tired of his negative opinions and misinformation on so many topics. One example is when he said that The United Negro College Fund does not hand out grants to white people.

His ignorance is beyond comprehension.

I guess that is why the backwater idiots love him so much. And the good ol' boys

I thought we got rid of Jimmy Carter's ideas and interference when we voted him out.

To the ignorant rednecks in the CSRA who have a problem with schools teaching Spanish: If you expect your children will remain in the CSRA only and not leave the boundaries of it for employment or school, I guess it’s OK for them to only learn English. You can’t even get a job in the medical profession in Ft. Lauderdale or Miami without knowing Spanish. So if you live here all your life and you never plan to leave, then I guess English is all you need. But I still feel your comment was ignorant.

OK, Nexium and Wachovia, I give up: Your ads on TV and radio are now rude.

Over and over with these same stupid ads of yours. You've got this purple pill and that bank is now this bank. Well big diddly dang deal! Enough already!

Congratulations to the Columbia County Republican Party for sinking to nearly an all-time low. (The low was 1991-1992.)

This year you made an elected official, Lee Muns, your chair. He is on the school board and does not even comply with the rules of his own board. He will undoubtedly be equally devious as the party Chair, since the party rules precluded an elected official from serving in the leadership until it was changed last Saturday.

The Muns approach: “If I don't like the rules, I'll either ignore them or get my gophers to change them!”

Phil Kent has sunk to an all-time low by using the Masters Tournament controversy as a way to raise money for the conservative, Atlanta-based Southeastern Legal Foundation he leads. I don’t know which is worse: a gadfly who demands that an ultra-rich, private male club recruit a wealthy token female member or an unprincipled hired gun who takes advantage of a sad situation in order to make a buck or two. Though their ideologies may differ, both are equally despicable.

Why do the guardrails on Laney-Walker Boulevard look like a war zone? It has remained this way for five years. Mayor Young, this is the Garden City, isn't it?

The person complaining about the food prep workers in fast-food restaurants

Words “We want to be near the front gate, bottom line. If this is not near the front gate, it’s not acceptable.”

— National Council of Women’s Organizations Chair Martha Burk, complaining to The Atlanta Journal-Constitution recently that a 5-acre site roughly a half-mile from the Augusta National main gate that the city has set aside for her to stage a protest against the club’s all-male membership isn’t close enough. The term “near,” however, is relative when you’re talking about an area with limited space, having either narrow, or no, sidewalks (depending on which side of Washington Road you’re on). In the beginning, we could hang with Burk’s right to voice her cause — merited or not. But now she’s coming across as the unreasonable opportunist others are making her out to be.

Thumbs Up Soon visitors to Augusta will be able to travel up and down the Augusta Canal in motorized boats modeled after the historic Petersburg barges that hauled cotton and other items up and down the waterway. A recent article in The Augusta Chronicle

reported that two of the boats, each 65 feet in length and capable of carrying 50 passengers, will be delivered to Augusta later this year. The addition of this unique feature should truly be a boon for Augusta’s efforts to draw visitors.

Thumbs Down Ben Harbin (R-Martinez) this week told The Atlanta Journal-Constitution that, because University of Georgia President Michael Adams ended the Bulldogs’ basketball season as a result of suspension of coach Jim Harrick, Atlanta lawmakers could possibly rethink the school’s funding in the state budget. “He (Adams) didn’t allow the team to play in the (SEC and NCAA) tournaments. That would bring in additional revenue. When he’s taken away an opportunity for additional revenue, I don’t know how it can’t play into it when he’s asking us for more money in the

state budget,” Harbin told the newspaper.

Haven’t UGA students been punished enough over this whole debacle? Not only have they watched a successful basketball season go down the drain, but now Harbin is suggesting that the state cut funding to the university? The last thing Adams wanted to do was cancel this year’s season, but shouldn’t Harbin appreciate the fact that Adams appears to care more about the university’s reputation as an ethically sound institution than allowing a coach accused of academic violations to finish out the year?

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continued from page 4 scratching themselves and then handling your food has a valid complaint.

However, that's the last thing you should worry about. Try reading a book entitled "Fast Food Nation" or going to www.PETA.com. (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) Web site to find out what is really in your fast food.

The Insider doesn’t know what he’s talking about. The Republican Party of Columbia County did not oust Alvin Starks. Congressman Norwood was in Washington, D.C., and did not have a thing to do with the election. We needed new leadership and it’s as simple as that!

It is a shame that men think women are only good for sex, cooking and cleaning.

Women are very capable of running multi-million dollar companies — just ask any secretary. The best laugh I had recently was when listening to an all-male conversation. The males had a “great idea.” They would send thank-you notes to all their clients. One of the males said, “I will have my secretary write the notes and mail them out.” They were going to play golf after lunch. Such a wonderful life for men!

Martha Burk and Jesse Jackson need to figure out their priorities. There are millions of other places where they can help black people and women, other than playing golf at the Augusta National. These people don’t care about anybody but themselves, only their own agendas.

Thumbs down to Austin's column last week. It was a nice letter to his daughter but of no interest to me or the thousands of other Spirit fans. Thanks, at least, for warning your readers before subjecting us to his drivel.

I’m a local musician, who is not a beginner. Why don’t the local musicians network and stick together instead of playing for free beer? Learning to play takes talent and money; equipment isn’t free and gas isn’t either. Also, those who book musicians: Pay them for their talent. They are increasing your business, whether you’re a club owner or local events organizer. Just look what happened with First Friday!

Stop complaining about Austin.

I'm no epidemiologist, but if the fraidycats at G.A.S.P. are correct, why aren't dogs keeling over left and right because their owners smoke? In many cases, they are subject to much more exposure than children are.

I’m always amazed that there are so many people who read well enough to pass their driving tests, but forget how to read when they get on the road. They cannot read speed limit signs or stop signs, and the vast majority who drive don’t know what a turn signal is for. And the idiots who turn right from the left turn lane are breaking the law and many of them with no signal. Georgia law says anyone who enters the left turn lane for any other purpose than a left turn is breaking the law.

What numbskulls we have on the road.

I found the article about the sex worker quite fascinating. I wonder how many

Suburban Torture BY

JULIE

LARSON

high-powered politicians and other socalled pillars of the community were reading that article hoping that their names wouldn't appear and breathing a sigh of relief at the discretion exercised by the woman and the writer. My bet is the "Augusta Madam" could tell a story or two about some of our elite white male citizens.

It's time for UGA to get serious about putting Vince Dooley out to pasture.

Last year a player was accused of rape, this year cheating. What's next? Are we really supposed to believe that Dooley is an innocent bystander while his coaches pay players? Get real.

So, Martha Burk is suing us. It seems like everybody wants to sue Augusta these days over the stupid actions of our illustrious Augusta Commission and our brilliant city attorney. The adult bookstore ordinance will cost taxpayers money in court and the protest ordinance will not likely hold up either. We need some people with half a brain to run for the commission.

So, the U.N. wants to give more time to negotiate! You don't negotiate with a mad dog! Saddam Hussein is a modern day version of Adolf Hitler! Think of all of the lives that would've been saved had Hitler been stopped! Now, as history repeats itself, let us not repeat our mistakes!

Man oh man! Did you catch the finish of Sunday's race at Darlington, S.C.? That was NASCAR racing at its finest! What a race! What a finish!

Only in Augusta is the pizza delivery guy given more respect and better directions to your house than an ambulance. Of course pizza is what you really want when you order it. An ambulance is what you ask for when what you really want is a taxi!

Where have all the flags gone? After 9/11 we were awash in a sea of red, white and blue. We all vowed we would never forget. We were filled with pride and patriotism and the determination that no one would ever sucker punch us again.

Now we are bombarded by people who think a madman has more credibility than our president does. It is time to get those flags out of mothballs and stand up for America. Those who forget the past are doomed to repeat it!

I think that people over 62 years old with a household income of less than $65,000 should be exempt from school taxes. Mr. Barry Fleming doesn’t care about anybody. When this question was brought up to him, he said he didn’t care how old anybody is. If he has to pay taxes, everybody should.

The next time you put somebody old on the front cover of your magazine, please make sure they have all their clothes on. I almost lost my lunch when I saw it!

- Call our Whine Line at 510-2051 and leave your comments. We won’t use your name. Fax your whines by dialing (706) 733-6663 or e-mail your whines to whine@metspirit.com.

7

HEALTH PAGE

M E T R O

Take care of yourself. Let University help.

“HealthTalk” on WGAC-580 AM

Tune in Monday, March 31, at 8:30 a.m. to hear Paul Schwartz, M.D., a board-certified gastroenterologist and member of University’s medical staff, discuss colon cancer early detection.

“Osteoporosis – The Bone Facts for Women and Men”

Featuring Orthopaedic Surgeon Douglas R. Phillips, M.D. TODAY, March 20 University Hospital dining rooms 1-3 Registration and dinner: 5:30 p.m.; physician presentation: 6-7 p.m.

Seniors Club members: $8; advance registration: $9; at the door: $10 To register, call 706/736-0847.

An Event Just for Women April 26 8 a.m.-2 p.m.

Warren Baptist Church, 3202 Washington Road Learn more about the unique you as you traverse the emotional, physical and spiritual journey of life. This event focuses on wellness and heart health for all women in the community.

Festivities will include door prizes, lunch, a fashion show and much more.

Seniors Club members: $10; general public: $15.

Attendance is limited to 200.

Reservations are required.

For more information or to register, call 706/738-2580 or 800/413-6652.

S P I R I T

Sunday, March 30, 2003

M A R

Registration and exhibits 12:15 p.m.

Classes 1-5 p.m.

University Hospital Levi W. Hill III Auditorium, first floor

2 0 2 0 0 3

BabyFest is a FREE, fun-filled, informative afternoon designed especially for new and expectant parents. Pediatricians and infant care medical specialists conduct classes and provide educational materials designed to answer your questions about parenthood and the first years of your baby’s life.

Tours of the Labor & Delivery, Postpartum and Nursery areas will be available. Join us for giveaways, door prizes, refreshments and more!

1 p.m.

First Six Weeks of Infant Care

Karen Foushee, M.D., pediatrician

2 p.m.

Common Illnesses in Your Child’s First Year Sharon Beall, M.D., pediatrician Infant Safety Scott Chappell, M.D., pediatrician Taking Care of Mom — The First Few Days Debby Given, R.N., childbirth educator Discipline — The Right Start J. David Allen, M.D., pediatrician 3 p.m.

Common Illnesses in Your Child’s First Year Jennifer Drake, M.D., pediatrician Adding the New Baby — Advice for Parents Debby Given, R.N., childbirth educator For Dads Only Douglas Nesbit, M.D., pediatrician Infant Safety Scott Chappell, M.D., pediatrician 4 p.m.

Common Illnesses in Your Child’s First Year Steve Moore, M.D., pediatrician Grandparenting Janice Dixon, Women’s Services representative Mom’s Menus Alicia Brown, dietetic intern Breast-feeding Jackie Echelberger, R.N., lactation consultant

For more information on BabyFest, call University’s W.G. Watson, M.D. Women’s Center at 706/774-2825 or log on to www.universityhealth.org.

FREE Mammograms Available

Through a grant from the Avon Breast Cancer Crusade, University Breast Health Center offers a FREE mammogram and education for any women 40 and older who qualify.

Call 706/774-4141.

March is National Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month

The American Cancer Society recommends colorectal screenings begin at age 50. If your mother, father, brother or sister has had the disease or you suffer from inflammatory bowel disease, screenings should begin earlier.

These tests can pick up problems long before symptoms occur and greatly increase your chances of survival.

Watch for These Symptoms • A change in bowel habits such as diarrhea, constipation or narrowing of the stool that lasts more than a few days • A feeling that you have to have a bowel movement that doesn't go away even though you've had a bowel movement • Bleeding from the rectum or blood in the stool • Cramping or steady stomach pain Unfortunately, the disease may be advanced before symptoms occur, so regular screenings are the best defense. Consult your physician to schedule a screening.

University Health Care System has been named the National Research Corporation’s Consumer Choice Award winner in the Augusta area for the fourth consecutive year.

F OR FREE 24- HOUR

Your resource for healthy living.

Healthy Adults “Health Risk Assessment Follow-up: Taking the Next Step” Featuring Holly Ford, program manager, Weight Management and Nutrition Center, and Susan Cota, R.N., M.S.N., C.N.S., community relations manager, University Health Care System March 31 Participants in February’s heart month programming received a FREE health risk assessment (HRA) to complete. They are invited to come back in March for this one-hour dinner program on March 31 for their results.

Registration and buffet dinner: 5:30 p.m.; presentation: 6-7 p.m.

Seniors Club members: $8; advance registration: $9; at the door: $10 Reservations are required.

To register, call 706/736-0847.

Surgically Assisted Weight Management Seminar March 27 5-6 p.m.

University Hospital Weight Management and Nutrition Center FREE Registration is required. Call 706/774-8917.

Healthy Older Adults For more information, call 706/738-2580.

Glucose Screenings Blood Pressure Checks Height and Weight Measurements Every Wednesday during March 9 a.m.-noon University Seniors Club, Daniel Village Shopping Center University Senior Club members only: FREE No appointment necessary

HEALTH INFORMATION , CALL

Healthy Women Registration is required and classes are held at University Breast Health Center. Call 706/774-4141.

Weekend Childbirth Education (Lamaze) Friday, 6:30-9:30 p.m. and Saturday, 9 a.m.-5:30 p.m.

March 21 and 22 $100

Lymphedema Education for Breast Cancer Surgery Patients Presented by Nicole Spiro, OTR/certified lymphedema therapist April 1 5 p.m.

FREE

Introduction to Infant CPR March 24 6:30-8:30 p.m. $5

“My Mom Has Breast Cancer” Presented by Pam Anderson, R.N., University Breast Health Center Education and support for children whose mothers have breast cancer April 10 5-6 p.m.

FREE Healthy Parents All classes are held in the Women’s Center classroom on the third floor unless otherwise stated. Registration is required. Call 706/774-2825 for information or to register.

Log on to learn more: www.universityhealth.org

Sibling Birthday Party TODAY, March 20 3-4 p.m.

University Hospital dining room 1 FREE Breast-feeding TODAY, March 20 7:30-9:30 p.m.

Babies R Us, Bobby Jones Expressway FREE

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AT

737-8423 (SER-VICE)

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Speech and Hearing Screening For Adults and Children To schedule an appointment, call 706/774-5777.

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800/476-7378 (SERV)

TODAY !

8 M E T R O

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Disputes Pro-Choice Views

S P I R I T M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

Letter to the Editor

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am sick to death of the cliché heralded by the pro-abortion movement: “A woman’s right to choose.” It doesn’t make logical sense. There were several choices available without “government interference”: the freedom to abstain from sex or to use birth control.

However, after conception, the choice that was made has now created a human being and First Amendment rights should be allowed to protect the baby — in this case, from the potential abuse from its own mother.

For Mary Ann Pierucci to say that, “In the two decades before abortion was legal in the U.S., it’s been estimated that nearly a million women per year sought out illegal abortions. Thousands died. Tens of thousands were mutilated,” is simply not true.

These fabrications are repeatedly expressed as fact with no reliable statistical support by the pro-choice movement in an attempt to advance the abortion industry.

In his book “Aborting America,” Dr. Bernard Nathanson, co-founder of the National Abortion (and Reproductive) Rights (Action) League (NARAL) turned pro-life supporter, admits that he and others in the abortion rights movement intentionally fabricated the number of women who allegedly died as a result of illegal abortions.

He states, “How many deaths were we talking about when abortion was illegal? ... It was always ‘5,000 to 10,000 deaths a year.’

I confess that I knew the figures were totally false, and I suppose the others did too if they stopped to think of it ... The overriding concern was to get the laws eliminated, and anything within reason which had to be done was permissible.”

Furthermore, a recent study (Barbara J. Syska; Thomas W. Hilgers, M.D.; and Dennis O’Hare, “An Objective Model for Estimated Criminal Abortions and Its Implications for Public Policy,” in New Perspectives on Human Abortion) on illegal abortions concluded that “a reasonable estimate for the actual number of illegal abortions per year in the pre-legalization era would be from a low of 39,000 (1950) to a high of 210,000 (1961) and a mean of 98,000 per year.” A significant number, no doubt, but a whopping 902,000 less than Ms. Pierucci would like for us to believe.

Ms, Pierucci began her commentary with the statement, “Behind every choice is a story.” Now, that much is true! For starters, the journal of the National Cancer Institute has released a study: “Risk of Breast

Cancer Among Young Women: Relationship to Induced Abortion” by Janet Darling. This study concluded that women who had an abortion in their first trimester put themselves at an increase risk for breast cancer, in some cases as high as 100 percent more than the general population.

Secondly, the effects of abortion includes high rates of suicide and death, also causing many women to bear the physical and emotional scars of post abortion syndrome for the remainder of their (lives).

And there’s more: Child abuse cases increased 370 percent from 1973 (the year abortion became legal) to 1980. There is no doubt legal abortion contributed to this sharp rise due to the effects abortion has had on women’s self-esteem and their ability to deal with stress. Dr. Philip Ney in a widely read study on the connection between abortion and child abuse notes “... elective abortion is an important cause of child abuse.”

With the amount of evidence that is available to us today about the effects of abortion on women and children, it seems misleading for the pro-choice movement to continue to proclaim that the abortion issue is “really about the value we place on women in society.” No, the abortion issue is really about an industry that is making the leaders of this movement very, very rich.

Carol Everett, who owned and operated several Dallas-area abortion clinics before joining the pro-life rank has said that money — and not “women’s rights”— is the governing force behind the abortion movement. During an interview, Ms. Everett is quoted as saying that the year she left the abortion industry she would have pocketed approximately $250,000, and projections for the following year suggested that she would net $1 million. You have to wonder how much Ms. Pierucci is taking to the bank for promoting such a form of oppression and violence against women and their offspring in our community.

Will you allow this to continue for the next 30 years? Make sure your decision is based on facts, not a hidden agenda.

“For all that is necessary for the forces of evil to prevail in this world, is that enough good men do nothing.”

— Edmund Burke Denise A. Hamrick — The views expressed in this column are the views of the writer and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

Who will win the Academy Awards?

See the Oscar preview in the Cinema section Page 62

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or those of you who enjoyed a little bit of father/daughter insight in my column last week, may I share a quick gem from my stepdaughter, Savannah?

Not yet 11 years old, Savannah got her first full-body search at the Fort Walton Beach Municipal Airport Sunday night.

Her mother and I were so proud.

Giggling as the crack security team inspected her bare feet and tickled her with their handheld metal detector, she was mortified when they handled the dirty laundry in her carry-on bag.

Big sister Christine actually got offended for her during the detailed search, then asked me an interesting question: “Daddy...when did kids start hurting airplanes?”

Good question. Subjecting a 10-yearold girl to a 10-minute body search makes about as much sense as many other “safety measures” put in place after 9/11. You should have seen the collection of odd characters who walked past the inspection table barely noticed while our fifth-grader was given a go-over worthy of Dr. No. She eventually made it through the process with much better humor than her parents. Amazingly, security personnel allowed her dirty socks on the plane.

Smart Case, Dumb Attorney Did you see the comment from one of the attorneys of accused rapist/kidnapper/nutcase Brian Mitchell? The goofball barrister actually suggested that if police showed leniency when charging and sentencing his client for the brutalization of Elizabeth Smart, it would inspire other kidnappers to free their victims.

The legal beagle needs to be reminded that Mitchell didn’t free his victim: He was caught.

Mitchell, a renegade Mormon polygamist, has suggested his plan was to have seven wives. The good news: Once imprisoned, Mitchell will likely gain seven husbands.

Augusta on HBO This past week saw the premiere of Bryant Gumbel’s Real Sports segment on the Augusta National. You had to love City Commissioner Marion Williams’ stand against changing the city’s public protest law.

Defending their position as sensitive to “blacks, who know the importance of free protest,” Williams actually said that, if his father and grandfather had not had the right to protest freely, he would still be “picking someone’s cotton.”

The right to protest freed the slaves?

Damn, I thought it was all those white guys in the Union Army. Thanks, Commissioner Williams, for your histori-

cal insight. Brilliant. Simply brilliant.

Neither Williams nor fellow Commissioner Lee Beard mentioned in the piece that they sold their ability to block the protest ordinance change for a fire station office on Laney-Walker Blvd.

Constitutional concerns are one thing, but shiny red fire trucks in the ‘hood are just plain cool.

AJC Great Clearing House for Augusta National Developments In the last few weeks I have found more breaking information concerning the Augusta National on the Web pages of The AtlantaJournal Constitution (www.ajc.com), than from any other source.

The AJC has dispatched a number of reporters to Augusta, and it appears they will be the “big city” newspaper of record on the unfolding Martha Burk flap. So far, their editorial stance has been predictable, but their reporting has been fair. Badgering the daughters of club members notwithstanding.

Off the record, I was told the AJC requested more access to the tournament than in the past. It will be interesting to see if the credentialed press contingent will be smaller than in previous years.

The National has gotten more requests, that is to be sure, but will they exercise more discretion in the distribution of the credentials? There have been a number of very nasty critics who are lining up now for professional access. If I were in control, I think I would send them a TV Guide and direct them to the CBS television affiliate in their respective cities.

But that’s just me.

R.I.P. Robert Daniels It was with heavy heart that I read about the recent passing of one of my favorite critics, Augusta Focus columnist Robert Daniels. Mr. Daniels immortalized yours truly in a column a few months back as a “beer-soaked, catfisheating redneck.”

Redneck? The closest thing I have to a country music record is a KD Lang CD, and I only bought that because I liked her girlfriend. I do confess a real affinity for catfish and beer. I drank one in Daniels’ honor when I learned he died.

While Daniels refused to debate me publicly, he was always good for a few chuckles in print. I will miss his contributions to the Focus.

In the meantime, it occurs to me that guys named Robert Daniels, who don’t like me, all seem to die before their time.

God bless them.

— The views expressed in this column are the views of the writer and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

The archived Austin Rhodes columns can now be seen at www.wgac.com.

11 M E T R O S P I R I T M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

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Augusta Adult Businesses Beware

W

hen Augusta commissioners voted last summer to prohibit the opening of an adult video store, little did they know they were about to embark on a turbulent trip that may force them to take on every adult entertainment business in the entire city and could jeopardize the future of long-time strip clubs like the Discotheque Lounge and the Marine Room.

On June 18, the Augusta Commission unanimously voted to deny a zoning application submitted by Augusta Video X-Mart for a location along Gordon Highway.

Following the vote, most people in town knew the city was going to get sued by the adult video store. After all, the Augusta-Richmond County Planning Commission had already stated that Augusta Video X-Mart’s application met all the city’s zoning requirements.

However, on the day of the store’s hearing before the Augusta Commission, more than 250 people from the community and local churches piled into the downtown courthouse to let their objections to the adult business be known.

The commission folded under the pressure and unanimously voted against Augusta Video X-Mart’s application.

Shortly after, as expected, Augusta Video X-Mart filed suit against Augusta.

In July, apparently in response to the lawsuit, the commission decided to change the city’s zoning ordinance by adding more specific language identifying where an adult entertainment establishment could be located in Augusta.

Basically, the amendment prohibited such adult businesses from locating in areas the city deemed as “gateway corridors.” One such gateway was Augusta Video X-Mart’s proposed site at the intersection of Gordon Highway and New Savannah Road. The city claimed it was a gateway corridor because it is the main artery leading into downtown from Augusta Regional Airport.

These changes to the adult entertainment ordinance were seen as a knee-jerk reaction to Augusta Video X-Mart’s application and led most Augustans to believe the city was going to lose in court — which, of course, it did.

According to Harry Revell, the attorney representing the city, U.S. District Court Judge Dudley Bowen ruled that, because the Augusta Commission’s amendments to the city’s adult entertain-

ment ordinance did not go through the proper public notice procedures, the ordinance changes made in July aren’t enforceable.

The judge stated the city should have first sent the ordinance changes to the planning commission, where that board would have to hold public meetings on the proposed changes. Once the planning commission reviewed the ordinance changes, it would send its recommendation on the revisions to the Augusta Commission.

The Augusta Commission would then also have to hold two public hearings on the amendments before the changes

BY STACEY EIDSON

Frails told the commission, since the federal court ruled against the city’s adult entertainment ordinance, he feels that Lewis is entitled to feature adult entertainment at his establishment without a permit from the city.

And that’s exactly what Lewis was doing, until February when Frails said Sgt. Greg Smith of the Richmond County sheriff’s vice division issued him a citation.

“We believe that citation was issued in error because there were no ordinances in place at the time that Mr. Lewis was operating the business,” Frails said. “We believe he is entitled to operate his business.”

“Hey, you ain’t seen the last of lawsuits you’re going to face.”

– Augusta Commissioner Willie Mays

could be officially made into law.

“So, in response to that order, what we have before you today is to amend that ordinance again,” Revell told the Augusta Commission on March 18.

Revell said the proposed changes to the adult ordinance were essentially the same as those passed in July, except this time the amendments have gone through all the proper channels.

Augusta Commissioner Willie Mays was happy to see that the city had finally followed proper procedure by holding the required public meetings.

“We are here today because we got whooped by what we drew up,” Mays said. “We didn’t get beat by somebody else’s rules in court; we got beat by our own rules.”

However, according to Randolph Frails, attorney for nightclub owner James Lewis who wants to feature nude dancers at his club on Damascus Road, the city still has a problem with its adult entertainment ordinance.

Frails also said that once the new amendments to the adult entertainment license are approved, he expects his client’s business to be grandfathered into the system.

County Attorney Jim Wall quickly corrected Frails.

“We have always had a zoning ordinance (for adult establishments) in place,” Wall said. “We are prohibited from enforcing our adult entertainment ordinance which regulates how the business operates. But as far as the location of the business, that zoning provision has been in place.”

And Wall said the only adult businesses that will be grandfathered into the system are those that have been legally operating since Jan. 1.

“If they are legally operating as of Jan. 1, 2003, then they will be grandfathered in for one year as far as the license is concerned,” Wall said.

Within minutes, Mays’ comfort level with the new ordinance crashed.

“When you talk about grandfathering in a business, am I right or wrong that I heard you say that it was good for a year?” Mays asked Wall.

“You heard correctly,” Wall answered.

Mays turned and pointed out the municipal building’s window at several strip clubs located along Broad Street, such as the Discotheque Lounge, Fantasy’s Showgirls and the Marine Room.

“Does that then mean that existing businesses, like those that are in eyesight of this building, that their grandfather status then becomes questionable in January of 2004?” Mays asked.

Wall paused for a moment and began discussing the question with Revell. He then turned back to the commission and hesitantly said, “That’s what I’m being told. Yes sir.”

Mays said he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He told the attorneys it was time to start calling those strip club business owners and letting them know about the proposed changes.

“This is what happens when you don’t talk to people, even in these so-called ‘undesirable’ businesses,” Mays said.

“If folk have been in business 15, 20 or 30 years or longer, like them or not, and you’re telling me those businesses could be in question when a year’s time expires, then I think it’s become imperative to have at least a conversation with them.”

After Mays’ revelation, the proposed changes to the ordinance failed to get commission approval with Augusta commissioners Ulmer Bridges, Tommy Boyles, Bill Kuhlke, Andy Cheek and Steve Shepard voting in support of the changes. Commissioners Lee Beard and Mays voted against the motion and Augusta Commissioner Richard Colclough abstained.

Mays said it was up to the city to clean up this mess.

“All I have to say in closing is that y’all think you just got sued (by Augusta Video X-Mart),” Mays warned. “You better be real careful, because we as a government put in those grandfathered provisions, like them or not, and if you’ve now written something that’s contrary to what’s there, then hey, you ain’t seen the last of lawsuits you’re going to face.

“Our attorneys are going to be the richest folks that we hire or employ in this city.”

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AUGUSTA IN THE

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In less than three weeks, reporters from all over the world will descend on Augusta to cover the prestigious 2003 Masters Tournament. But this year, due to the ongoing controversy over the Augusta National’s all-male membership, many of the reporters will have another agenda. Their concern will not be to show the tradition of the Augusta National or the outstanding skill of the tournament’s athletes; they will only be interested in one thing: getting the dirt on Augusta. Anything that will make our city look like the rural, backward town featured in Erskine Caldwell’s “Tobacco Road.”

The only problem is, these attacks will not tarnish the image of their intended target, the Augusta National. The great Bobby Jones and Clifford Roberts intentionally built a preeminent golf club that will weather the test of time.

However, the city of Augusta is much more vulnerable to world opinion.

So, in preparation for this onslaught of negative media, The Metropolitan Spirit decided to have a little fun.

The following is a mock story written like many articles Augustans will probably see in the coming weeks in newspapers and magazines across the country. It paints Augusta at its worst, using stereotypes of the Deep South and the most extreme examples of the city’s embarrassing past.

The story is meant to give locals a little chuckle, but also to challenge the national press to dig a little deeper. Don’t kill a town over one woman’s cause.

BY STACEY EIDSON

Photo by Brian Neill

S

tepping off the airplane at The Hill, located in the historic neighborAugusta Regional Airport, my hood called Summerville, is the only area in first impression of this all of Augusta through which a visitor can Southern town, known as the clearly understand why this city was once Garden City, was an described as the daughter of Charleston, S.C. overwhelmingly foul stench It’s about 11 a.m. and Dorothy and the three lingering in the air. other women invited to the game are enjoying “What died?” a fellow passenger from New a little brandy milk punch before their noon York asks a local airport worker. He remarks lunch at the Augusta Country Club. All of the that the city’s wastewater treatment facility is women, who happen to be over the age of 65, approximately a mile away. are considered the blue bloods of Augusta.

While it is true that Augusta’s city They are the wives of a retired doctor, lawyer planners apparently did not have any and banker. compatibility concerns with locating a Dorothy’s husband is still a prominent local wastewater treatment plant and the city’s judge at age 76. municipal airport side-by-side, the explanaThe topic of conversation this morning is the tion given by the airport worker is not women’s excitement over a recent article they completely accurate. read in the daily newspaper, The Augusta After spending a week in this town, I have Chronicle, about neighbor Martha Boardman come to the realization that the dead smell is the Fleming’s new cookbook called “Mycelium city of Augusta, itself. That rancid odor is the Madness! Fun with Portabella Mushrooms.” reek of the city’s political corruption, a stagnant “She is a woman of class,” Dorothy tells economy and unabashed prejudiced views. me, in her wonderfully thick Southern accent.

Augusta, once “Not this a popular winter Martha Burk resort for woman. What thousands of she is doing to Northerners, is Augusta is UGUSTA ONCE A now nothing totally unfair.” more than the [Pronounced POPULAR WINTER city located “un-FAY-uh.”] outside the I asked RESORT FOR THOUSANDS gates of the Dorothy how Augusta she felt about National Golf Martha OF ORTHERNERS IS Club.

Boardman A city that for telling a Sports NOW NOTHING MORE 51 weeks out of Illustrated the year merely reporter a few THAN THE CITY LOCATED exists, waiting years ago that for those each day she OUTSIDE THE GATES OF precious seven wakes up and days of Masters looks up to the Week when the heavens and THE UGUSTA ATIONAL rest of the says, “‘God, I world considers thank you for OLF LUB it truly signifimaking me’ – cant. in this order – But now the ‘Southern, curse of white, AngloAugusta has finally caught up to the Masters Saxon and a nongolfer.’” in the form of this year’s planned protest of The women just laughed. the Augusta National’s men-only member“Damn right,” Dorothy says, smiling and yet ship policy by Martha Burk, chair of the perfectly serious. “Anyone that doesn’t underNational Council of Women’s Organizations. stand what she meant doesn’t understand the The one prestigious event that the city could South. They’re jealous. That’s all. I really think genuinely boast and the golf club that is they just have some real anger there.” easily the only reason map-makers bother [Pronounced “ANG-uh THEY-uh.”] identifying Augusta, have now both been Dorothy explains a lot of people simply tarnished by scandal. don’t understand Southern traditions and the The Augusta National has become the new life of those living on The Hill. international symbol for sex discrimination.

Just minutes from the Summerville neighborAs each day passes and the controversy hood is a much newer neighborhood, but with continues to grow with the addition of more equally large houses, along Lake Forest Drive. groups intending to protest during the Most of the people living on Lake Forest Drive, Masters — including the Ku Klux Klan as however, are what Dorothy considers to be well as the Rev. Jesse Jackson’s “transplants.”

Rainbow/PUSH coalition — I can’t help but They are not from Augusta and they often notice the stench in the air is getting worse. come from “new money.”

“Oh, that’s from the factories beyond the But according to one banker from railroad tracks in east Augusta. When it’s Birmingham, Ala., living on Lake Forest windy, you can sometimes catch those smells,” Drive: Money is money. explains Dorothy, 71, who invited me to her “Those on The Hill may own Augusta,” he weekly bridge game on the back porch of her said, with a smile, “but Lake Forest runs it.” stately 1860s home on The Hill. The porch As I was comfortably seated on Dorothy’s faces a brilliant garden tapestry of vivid pink back porch, soaking up the beautiful scenery and red azalea bushes, large oaks, dogwood continued on page 16 trees and a stone wall draped with wisteria.

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and the women’s warm Southern hospitality, it was easy to believe that The Hill has not been affected by the slow decay of Augusta.

But that’s not completely true.

A fitting symbol of the town’s devastating collapse is the former Bon Air Hotel along Walton Way. In the 1920s, the Bon Air was a grand hotel that proudly stood high at the entrance of The Hill, welcoming visitors to Augusta’s historic Summerville neighborhood.

The Bon Air quickly became the vacation destination of choice for the rich “Yankees” and the social elite prior to the development of Florida’s coasts. Famous guests such as John D. Rockefeller and at least three United States presidents were known to have spent time at the hotel.

When the Augusta National officially opened for membership play in December 1932, the hotel hosted lavish dinners for members of the United States Golf Association and was said to be the site for the Masters “unofficial auction pool.”

These days, to visitors driving from downtown Augusta along the John C. Calhoun Expressway, the Bon Air still appears to be the glorious, gleaming white giant on The Hill, prepared to offer visitors the time of their lives. But instead, this once white giant is more like Augusta’s white elephant.

Today, the Bon Air, with its peeling white paint and sagging exterior is a retirement home, barely recognizable as a once-great hotel.

Down the street from Summerville are the communities of Harrisburg and “Pinch Gut,” a name that according to local author Ed Cashin’s book, “The Story of Augusta” could have come about after a local vendor remarked on the appearance of the neighborhood’s flood-starved children. However, no one really seems to know how this unflattering nickname originated.

Once visitors enter Augusta’s downtown, they are greeted with a mixture of bars and restaurants — several established by young, local entrepreneurs — as well as banks, hospitals, apartments, law offices, churches, hotels, museums and a beautiful Riverwalk overlooking the Savannah River.

While some aspects of the downtown area are visibly pleasing, there are still a number of vacant storefronts that line the streets.

Last year, in order to help promote downtown, the city held a grand opening celebration of what is known as the Augusta Common, hosted by none other than MTV’s own Carson Daley. When I learned about this celebration, I have to admit I was impressed with the effort made by the city and eagerly walked along downtown’s Broad Street to see this new development. After walking up and down the street a few times, I asked a store owner the location of the Augusta Common.

The man laughed and told me I was standing only a few feet away from it. I turned and realized the Augusta Common was nothing more than a wide strip of grass with a few benches, a short brick wall and a statue of James Olgethorpe, the founder of Augusta, smack in the middle of this so-called park.

I couldn’t help but wonder what Mr. New York City, Carson Daley, was thinking when he was brought to this “grand” opening of what basically amounts to a stretch of grass. I later learned he was promised a trip out to the

Augusta National for a game of golf.

Everything quickly became crystal clear.

If visitors venture further down Broad Street, they are met with another kind of downtown development. Only a few hundred feet away from Augusta Museum of History and a historic neighborhood called Old Towne, are a handful of strip clubs with names such as the Discotheque Lounge, Baby Dolls and Fantasy’s Showgirls.

And in Augusta, there’s no such thing as pasties or even panties. These clubs offer patrons a full show.

Ironically, less than three blocks from these strip clubs is the municipal building, otherwise known as The Marble Palace, along Greene Street.

Augusta is one of three cities around the state of Georgia that has consolidated its government, meaning in 1995 state legislators drafted

white and five black commissioners representing constituents often leads to significant division on the board, as one Associated Press reporter noted after the commission voted down racial lines during a March meeting.

“The signs labeled ‘white’ and ‘colored’ came down long ago from the water fountains outside the chambers of the AugustaRichmond County Commission,” the reporter wrote. “But the merger six years ago of the city and county government has created a new sort of division along racial lines ...”

More than three years ago, a Richmond County grand jury called for a “citizens alert” to what they saw as government corruption and micromanagement by Augusta commissioners.

A special grand jury was later formed to investigate the matter.

To date, a lot of accusations have been made by the special grand jury against local officials

IT’S DIFFICULT FOR MANY BLACK RESIDENTS IN AUGUSTA TO SEE THEIR LOCAL BLACK LEADERS TREATED LIKE CRIMINALS IN WHAT THEY CONSIDER TO BE A MERITLESS INVESTIGATION, PARTICULARLY AS THEY ’VE WATCHED THEIR SECTION OF TOWN DETERIORATE UNDER A FAILING ECONOMY WITHOUT A WORD OF CONCERN FROM

AUGUSTA’S WHITE COMMUNITY.

a bill that merged the city of Augusta and the Richmond County government into one body.

At the time of the merger, the city of Augusta was in dire financial straits and local leaders believed the best way for the city to avoid bankruptcy was to consolidate with the county.

Politicians were able to sell the idea to voters by promising consolidation would eventually save both the city and county money.

It’s been over six years since consolidation and voters are still waiting for those savings to materialize.

But, while reducing taxes is always an issue for Augusta voters, straightening out the local government, particularly the Augusta Commission, has become an even bigger priority.

Currently, Augusta-Richmond County is represented by 10 commissioners and a mayor.

Five of the commissioners are black and five of the commissioners are white. Augusta Mayor Bob Young, who happens to be a former broadcaster for a local TV station, is also white.

To the outside world, having a racially balanced commission is probably viewed as a positive way to ensure fairness in a town of more than 200,000 people that has an equal amount of black and white citizens.

However, Augusta has found having five

and city employees, particularly Augusta’s former Fire Chief Ronnie Few, but no one has been reprimanded or charged with a crime.

While an investigation of the city government by a special grand jury may sound serious, this town is used to dealing with crooked politicians.

A number of the city’s elected officials have found themselves in jail, including former Richmond County Sheriff J.B. Dykes and Augusta’s first black mayor Ed McIntyre.

But across the railroad tracks and along the inner-city streets lined with shotgun houses, many black residents have a different opinion about such investigations of politicians. In the Laney-Walker neighborhood, citizens will tell you that racism is driving the special grand jury investigation.

“Have you noticed that all of the politicians investigated by the grand jury are black?” asks Charles, a mechanic from this predominately black neighborhood. “That’s not my opinion.

That’s a fact. People say the good ol’ boy system is dead and the Cracker Party is gone. I don’t believe it. No one here believes that.”

It’s difficult for many black residents in Augusta to see their local black leaders treated like criminals in what they consider to be a meritless investigation, particularly as

they’ve watched their section of town deteriorate under a failing economy without a word of concern from Augusta’s white community.

The Laney-Walker neighborhood and the surrounding area was once thriving with black businesses such as the Red Star, a black hotel and restaurant; the Lenox Theater, that offered movies to the black community; and the Del Mar, a black club that managed to attract such acts as Muddy Waters and B.B. King.

“Back then, this area was known as the ‘Golden Blocks,’” Charles said.

Today, these former money-making businesses are no longer in operation. The buildings have been torn down and vacant lots stand in their places.

“It’s like no one in Augusta appreciates what we’ve done,” Charles said. “No matter what success we have, the white community is always ready to tear it down. Just ask James Brown.”

Ironically, James Brown, one of the greatest legends of the music world, grew up in Augusta. However, unless visitors happen to accidentally turn down Augusta’s desolate Ninth Street, otherwise known as James Brown Boulevard, no one would ever know.

Why isn’t the city of Augusta aggressively promoting this local legend that thousands around the world deeply admire and respect?

Well, the answer is baffling, but easy to explain.

On Sept. 24, 1988, according to reports from The Augusta Chronicle, James Brown allegedly walked into an insurance seminar going on next to his west Augusta business office. He was carrying a shotgun and accusing the 40 men and women at the seminar of using his private bathroom without permission.

Needless to say, even James Brown can’t get away with doing that.

Minutes after the incident, the Godfather left his office located along Wheeler Road and led police on a two-state car chase that ended when police shot out his truck’s tires and Brown returned to downtown Augusta driving on his wheel rims. When Brown’s truck finally came to a rest, the Godfather was reportedly charged with aggravated assault and failure to stop for police.

He would spend the next two years in jail.

It’s just another example of Augusta’s many misfortunes.

But if you think the music world has been tough on Augusta, consider the literary work “Tobacco Road” by Erskine Caldwell.

Tobacco Road is an actual road in Augusta directly adjacent to Augusta Regional Airport that leads to several south Augusta industries and neighborhoods lined with septic tanks and Confederate flags waving from their porch posts.

However, “Tobacco Road” is also the title of Caldwell’s book which depicts a miserably impoverished family suffering from disease, malnutrition and partaking in disturbingly immoral behavior such as incest.

The characters in “Tobacco Road” go way beyond the average person’s image of poor white trash.

After reading Caldwell’s “Tobacco Road,” I think it’s safe to say that few people would ever want to visit Augusta’s Tobacco Road for a literary tour.

No matter how great the novel, “Tobacco

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Road” will never be the tourism boost for Augusta like “Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil” has been for Savannah.

So, that brings us back to Augusta’s crown jewel, the Augusta National. The club is located off Washington Road, which was recently described in the golf mystery, “Take Dead Aim” as being “the most unrelentingly tacky street in America.”

Michelle Hiskey, a writer for The Atlanta Journal-Constitution called the street lined with shopping malls and fast food restaurants “a place that feels comfortable to John Daly, the redneck (golf) pro from Arkansas, who parked his motor home a few blocks away from the (Augusta National) club near the Pep Boys, across the street from Venus and Adonis Hairstylist and Body So Bronze.”

During the Masters, hundreds of tents line Washington Road selling everything from paintings of the Augusta National’s Amen Corner to “never before offered” cellular phone deals.

It’s complete chaos outside the gates of the Augusta National leading to Magnolia Lane.

But as tacky as Washington Road may sound during the week of Masters, even more pathetic is locals’ complete disregard for the club during the remainder of the year.

On an average day in Augusta, hundreds of cars mindlessly drive by the Augusta National’s main entrance on their way to the IHOP for some Country Griddle Cakes or to McDonald’s to take advantage of its limitedtime-offer of a McRib Sandwich. It’s as if the club’s gates are invisible in this town.

There’s no appreciation for the gift this city was given. As I drive down Washington Road headed back out to Augusta Regional Airport, I realize I’m actually looking forward to the rancid smell of the city’s wastewater treatment plant because, after all, crap is the best thing this redneck town has to offer.

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18

THE RACE FOR SHERIFF

M E T R O S P I R I T

Q&A

M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

WITH

ROWLAND AND HUNT

Editor’s note: There has been much controversy and misinformation circulating about the Aiken County Sheriff’s race leading up to the March 25 primary. That’s particularly true as it pertains to Mike Hunt and Jody Rowland, the two GOP contenders vying for a general election spot to fill former Sheriff Howard Sellers’ uncompleted third term, resulting from his accepting a federal law enforcement position. Although the victor will face a Democratic challenger in the May 13 general election, most political watchers agree, either Hunt or Rowland will become the county’s next sheriff. We sat down with each for a question-and-answer session.

MIKE HUNT

Q. How long have you been in law enforcement, in what capacities and how much of that time has been in Aiken County?

A. I’ve been in law enforcement 21 years, and 26 years in the fire service, all of that in Aiken County. I started in the county jail, went to North Augusta Public Safety when I turned 21, after a year at the jail. I started my uniformed career at North Augusta. Came to Aiken in the middle ‘80s. I worked my way up through the ranks from sergeant to lieutenant. I’m presently lieutenant over our Special Operations Division, which is our third largest division in the department. I’m responsible for managing that division. Total budget for the whole division is about $1 million out of a total $6.5 million departmental budget. I am responsible for the Bloodhound Tracking Team, Drug Interdiction Unit, Traffic Division, SWAT Team, Warrants Division, all of our extradition, VIP security, and here recently, Animal Control, which used to be under Public Works but they’ve put it under Public Safety now.

career. And those are classes that touch all areas of law enforcement, including management and administration. I have over 4,000 class hours, total, just at Aiken. So I do have an education — a very in-depth, specific education to the area of law enforcement.

Q. What is your perception of the way the sheriff’s office has been run during the course of Howard Sellers’ tenure as sheriff and/or over the last several years?

A. I’m not going to comment on Sheriff Sellers. Sheriff Sellers did a fine job while he was here. He was the answer to professional law enforcement when we first elected him. But this is not between Sheriff Sellers and I. I do think Mr. Rowland was responsible for day-to-day operations over the last several years and I think that the sheriff’s office is not very well respected by the citizens that it serves, and it should be as well respected as the department of public safety, in both cities, North Augusta and Aiken, and it can be under proper management.

Q. What three things do you think best qualify you to assume the post of Aiken County Sheriff?

A. Well, I’m a proven leader and manager; I have people skills; and I’m well respected by the citizens of this county. I’ve served them a long time.

Q. How do you feel it has not been respected and why?

A. Well, traveling during the campaign, the citizens of Aiken County that rely on the sheriff’s office are just not satisfied. The sheriff’s office has not been accessible to them, and it hasn’t been accessible to the employees that serve at the sheriff’s office. There’s a 97-percent turnover in the last seven, eight years. That in itself should tell you something. It’s not pay. Pay has been comparable. They just got a raise, so that puts them the second highest in the county, North Augusta being the highest and we’re (Aiken Public Safety) the second highest.

Q. Supporters of Jody Rowland have held out his college degree as an obvious advantage he has over you and others in the race. How important do you really believe a college degree is in law enforcement?

Can time on the job supersede it or at least put two people on the same footing?

A. I have over 200 specialized classes that I have taken during my

Q. You’ve proposed 12-hour shifts for road patrol. How would that work and why do you think it’s necessary?

Also, do many of your fellow officers with Aiken Public Safety favor working 12-hour shifts, or do they already?

A. Our department works twelves. Just about every department in the state has gone to 12-hour shifts, just like your industry has, your hospital personnel have. Under Mr. Rowland’s plan, they changed

Q. How many people do you supervise within that department?

A. Under my total budget, 30 to 35.

By Brian Neill

19

their shifts after everybody started talking about platforms in this election, and they’ve gone to three straight tens; they do not rotate.

They claim to have 13 people on a shift. They do on a shift. The problem is, under three straight tens, you cannot work all 13 people a shift at one time, because it runs you over in a pay period, because you don’t rotate. And I called (the sheriff’s office) today. There’s six deputies working right now in this county of 1,200 square miles, including a supervisor. Because, what they have to do is, they have to work half, while the other half is off, out of (each) shift. So, if we’re going to tell people that we’ll have 13 people, let’s put them working the road; let’s don’t just show it on paper. We have looked at organizational charts, and we could put 12 to 15 deputies on the road; per shift, working four, 12-hour shifts, if we streamlined the department.

and to the employees that work for the department. We will have better response times by putting more deputies on the road, by streamlining and going to a better shift. And we will make improvements to our communications system. The county communications system comes under the direct control of the sheriff and it is in disarray. There’s ambulances not being sent to calls, ambulances sent to the wrong location, fire departments not being dispatched. The (Aiken County) Fire Chiefs Association publicly endorsed me last week. They have a problem with dispatch. That dispatch serves all the volunteer fire departments in this county. It’s evident we have a problem and we’re going to get on the problem very quickly. That’s our first link to help.

Q. Do you think 12 to 15 deputies, still, is enough to cover an area the size of Aiken County?

A. Well, we’ve also found 10 other people that we could put on two separate “power shifts” of five people each, that would also work twelves on an overlap. So at maximum staffing, we could have 20 deputies on the road during our overlap time. No police administrator will ever tell you he will not need more (officers) in the future. But 15 deputies is a lot better than working six deputies and sometimes it gets lower than that ... I think it’s a matter of taking what we have, a $6.3 million budget at the sheriff’s office, streamlining it, cutting the fat at the top — they’re management-heavy — and putting it on the road where it belongs. We have citizens in this county waiting two or three hours for a car to come to their home when it’s broke into. What better reason to streamline and put it (resources) on the road?

Q. What do you think about the criticism Rowland, your opponent, has received for allegedly moonlighting as a repo man and using his sheriff’s office position in the process of conducting his side work? And in addition to that, do you moonlight? And what are your thoughts on it as it pertains to simultaneously holding a high-profile position in law enforcement?

A. We have run a very positive campaign through this election.

We will continue to run a positive campaign that will not resort to personal attacks. I have no interest in, or no information about, the allegations about Mr. Rowland. That’s your answer to the first part of the question. The second part of the question: I do not moonlight. I think that if you’re going to be a law enforcement leader and officer, that that’s where your time should be spent and that’s what I do now. I lead a very large division, so I don’t have time to moonlight.

Q. Name three specific things you’d promise to change or do differently the first six months you were in office, if elected.

A. We will make the department more accessible to the citizens

Q. What about Rowland’s assertions that appeared in The Aiken Standard and The Augusta Chronicle about you having “deep ties” to the Irish Traveler community and using those ties to sling mud at him?

Any truth to that?

A. There’s no truth. I have some support since the campaign came open from some of the Travelers that live in Aiken County. I will not treat a certain group of people any differently because of where they live in the county. I will treat everybody the same. I will accept their support, vote-wise, just like anybody would, but I’d hold them accountable to the law just like I would every other neighborhood.

Q. One criticism that was leveled at you, and I believe it was during the Bobby’s Bar-B-Q meeting where you and other candidates squared off, was that you might not have experience dealing with a large budget like that of the sheriff’s office.

A. Well, I do deal with a large budget. I deal with a milliondollar budget that I’m responsible for putting together out of a $6.5 million total budget. No police administrator in the world handles a total budget by himself. It’s about surrounding yourself with good staff and everybody having a piece of the pie that they’re responsible for putting together to submit the final budget. And I am very deeply involved in our budget process. I realize the importance of surrounding yourself with good people and good management, because it is a team effort, the budget. The chief or the sheriff does not put the budget together by himself. I’m quite capable of handling the budget by surrounding myself with good people.

Q. Is this your first trip into the political arena and has anything surprised you about the process, thus far?

A. Well, it’s my first trip running for office. I know how politics can be and nothing surprises me about politics. We’ve enjoyed the race to be honest with you. I do not like this negative stuff that’s come out and I’m just going to stay away from it. It’s none of my business. continued on page 20

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20 M E T R O S P I R I T

THE RACE FOR SHERIFF

JODY ROWLAND

M A R

able) to go to the University of South Carolina and get a master’s degree in criminal justice, so I’m very, very proud of that. So, for the last eight years I’ve been chief deputy and that allows me to be involved in every phase of the operation, including personnel and budget. So I now manage the day-to-day operation of the sheriff’s office, 143 employees, 106 sworn (deputies). And I’ve had my hands on a $6 million budget now for three or four years and know the ins and outs of this agency better than anybody.

2 0 2 0 0 3

Q. Give a brief run-down of your law enforcement history in the area.

A. Of course, I’ve been in just over 20 years, and in that 20 years I’ve accumulated 20 years of experience. I actually started out as a road deputy here in Aiken and Edgefield County. I progressed to investigations. I went to work for the Alcohol and Beverage Control commission in Columbia. The state police, roving all of South Carolina, but yet, actually being responsible for Edgefield and Aiken counties. So that continued to keep me in investigations here and in Edgefield County. I met Sheriff (Howard) Sellers in ‘92, right after his primary, and bought into his vision of the Aiken County Sheriff’s Office, what it could become, and just readily signed on with his program. Came here in January of ‘93 as the captain of the Criminal Investigation Division. There, I was able to manage 27 people and a $600,000 budget. I managed criminal investigations, juvenile (crime), narcotics, forensics and I later helped form my Entry Team while here in CID. Q. Entry Team?

A. Most folks would call it a SWAT team, but we have such a small group that we practice entry and containment as much as we practice anything else, so we call it a High-Risk Entry Team.

(Continuing with response to first question): Eight years ago, I was very fortunate to be selected chief deputy with Sheriff Sellers. During the time I was captain of CID and Chief Deputy, I was able to go to the FBI National Academy in 1994, which I am so proud of. Less than onetenth of one-percent of all police officers get to the FBI National Academy. It is the world’s finest police academy. Through an 18-month period it took me, (I was

Q. You recently instituted a shift-rotation schedule for road deputies in order to provide more patrol coverage and improve response times, an issue that has needed to be addressed at the sheriff’s department for some time. Explain how the new system works, and also, has it had an impact, and if so, how do you know?

A. First, let me tell you some history on that. Realize, our calls for service have grown 147 percent since 1993. And we have not grown at all, with the exception of three road deputies, since 1993. No business in this country can go up 150 percent and you get by with three more employees.

You cannot do it. It’s impossible. Sheriff Sellers went to council year in and year out to get more deputies and was turned down every year. Every year. And the only two deputies we got were two in Beech Island which came to us via council. They were assigned to Beech Island and that was the agreement with council. And then I think we’ve added on one more since then ... February 1, I had the ability to change the shifts the way I saw fit, and I did.

And I’ve had political jabs given to me ever since, but that’s OK. I did the right thing, for the right reasons, at the right time and that’s all that matters to me.

Our response times are bad, but let me tell you this: Our response times to the index crimes — the seven major crimes in law enforcement — are outstanding. Our homicide response is about six minutes and our most vicious property crime is about 16 minutes. It is the property crimes, the civil crimes, the domestic misunderstandings, that’s where our response times are so poor ...

So, we work a 10-hour shift, which gives us a small overlap in the daytime and a large overlap at night. So, during our overlaps, we are dramatically reducing the response times. But when we’re not overlapped, I’m still seeing the problem. I’d like to get another month or two of watching the time and seeing the pattern, seeing exactly how we’re responding before I a make a big statement about whether we’re improving or not.

Q. Former Sheriff Howard Sellers seemed to have an accessibility issue. Even though he talked about having an open-door policy, some people felt he was kind of the “man behind the curtain,” so to speak. If elected, could members of the public come and talk to you most any time they wanted?

A. My second week on the job here, I went to the public and I went to the press, with a written, open-door policy, explaining myself exactly on that. And my policy on that is very simple. If I’m here, and I’m available, and you come to the lobby, you’re going to see me right that minute. You call here, I have telephone call sheets and these call sheets are forwarded to me about every hour or every two hours, and I’m returning my telephone calls on a daily basis now. If I’m tied up, if I’m busy, if I’m on a

case, if I’m on an interview, or I’m in the courtroom and you come to this lobby, we will make an appointment with you right then and there, or we will call you back to make an appointment with you. That’s going to happen. We will get that done and I’ve been getting that done ... Today’s sheriff needs to know the pulse of the community and he needs to know the pulse of the people that come in and complain and that’s exactly what I’m accomplishing. And I don’t want you to think I’m sitting here waiting on people to come in. That’s not true either. I’m going to be involved in religious organizations, civic organizations, community organizations, and I’ll be in the public. I’ll be more accessible than anything we’ve had.”

Q. What are three concrete things you would promise to change or do differently within the first six months if you were elected to the office of sheriff?

A. I’ve already done two of those things. One, I changed the shifts. Against conventional wisdom, when opponents took jabs at me, I knew it was needed. I knew how to get it done. I knew the shift pattern, what it needs to be. And I did it my first day on the job as interim sheriff.

Secondly, I knew that first week, accessibility is not a factor with Jody Rowland. Accessibility has been a factor with Howard Sellers for years. That’s the way he chose to manage. I respect him greatly for it. I’m my own man; I have my own management philosophy. You know, every person who has had a supervisor as he’s gone through years of experience, he takes a little from every supervisor he works with, but you also learn what you don’t want to take from a supervisor, too ... And I know exactly what I don’t want to take from Howard Sellers, and I know exactly the professional things that he taught me that I do want to take into the future ... Thirdly, it is the team-building. I see myself as team-builder. I know I have the ear of council. I know I have a good working relationship with council right now. They know I’m a goto man. They have come to me with problems in the past; I have worked with them. I was Sheriff Sellers’ go-to man. I took problems to council to get them worked out.

I believe, by working with the Judicial Public Safety Committee, and working with council on a strategic plan to help us build the sheriff’s office up to the standards where we can meet our citizens’ complaints more efficiently, is what I believe my role is.

Q. I know Beech Island has historically been a sore spot in terms of the sheriff’s office’s image.

I can remember when the department installed a sub-station out there after a rash of convenience store robberies and I remember many residents saying the move didn’t do much in terms of curbing crime. I also notice an awful lot of “Elect Mike Hunt” signs out in Beech Island.

Do you think that assessment of the department’s relationship with Beech Island is fair, and if so, what would you tell Beech Island residents to expect from a Rowland-run sheriff’s office?

A. Realize that Beech Island has two deputies assigned to Beech Island, full-time. They have no other function in this sheriff’s office except to patrol Beech Island. There’s no other community in Aiken County that has that. Not Belvedere, North Augusta, not Wagener, Salley, Perry, continued on page 22

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22 M E T R O S P I R I T M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

THE RACE FOR SHERIFF

continued from page 20 New Ellenton, no other area has that. Beech Island is right on the state line; it’s not on the best side of town either, and when I say that, I mean, I’m talking about Augusta. It’s not on the best side of Augusta, either. It’s right on that state line. There’s a lot of activity, there’s a tremendous traffic flow in Beech Island and we monitor that situation just as closely as we can. Since changing the shifts, Beech Island’s zones are now smaller. Beech Island is now seeing more deputies than they did in the past, even with the two there ... Now, there’s four deputies in that same zone that used to have two in it, so they (residents) are seeing that now. I’m very aware of Beech Island’s problems. We do need more presence there, but we need the exact same presence in Belvedere, too. We need the exact same presence in Monetta, we need the exact same presence in Wagener, Salley. Beech Island is fortunate to have the presence that they have, but it will take a strategic plan to put more manpower on the road here in Aiken County. And I can get that done.

Q. You were second in command. What would you tell those who weren’t satisfied with a Sellers-run sheriff’s office and think that you might just bring more of the same?

A. I think I’ve already answered that question. But, I have been a very dedicated, loyal employee for 10 years and if you go back to Alcohol Beverage Control and Edgefield County before that, they’ll tell you I was a dedicated, loyal employee then. Folks who have that question (about Rowland mirroring Sellers), maybe they have been in a position where they can tell their supervisors what to do.

I have never been able to tell my boss or my supervisors what to do. But when they gave me marching orders, I was going to see to it that it happened. I’m a man of my word, and I can back up what I just said, because, February 1, when I had the opportunity to make those changes, to do those things, well I’ve done them. I’m not talking about something I’ll do after the election. I took the chance, took the risk, and I’m doing it now. I’m doing it as we speak.

Q. For a while, the Aiken County Sheriff’s Office had an abysmal record in terms of officers wrecking their own cars. The Chronicle in November of 2000, reported that deputies had already wrecked 25 times that year, and of those wrecks, 17 were considered avoidable.

Furthermore, the Aiken County Sheriff’s Office

had a higher accident rate than any county in Georgia — the state which the paper compared it with — with the exception of Chatham County.

What was up with that? Has it changed, and what would you do to encourage safer driving in the future?

A. We train strenuously on EVO, Emergency Vehicle Operations. And we train twice a year on them and we also have remedial training if we can spot a problem. A lot of things were going on in 2000. I’m not shucking blame here; I accept full responsibility for it. We had an unbelievably aging fleet. We went through many years — ‘97, ‘98, ‘99 and 2000 — of buying used patrol cars from out of state. Realize, the sheriff’s automobile budget is not the sheriff’s budget. It comes from Public Works.

Public Works chose to buy used cars and that’s what we had to live with. So few of our critics accept that, that the sheriff’s budget is not his own — vehicles come from Public Works. Back then, we had an enormous amount of patrol cars on the road, every day, with 200,000 miles on them. One hundred fifty thousand miles. A hundred thousand miles ... We have improved. We have a better fleet of automobiles now. The strategic plan we made on automobile replacement has not been kept; we got no cars last year and it appears we aren’t going to get any this year, which means by July 1 of this year, we’ll be two years behind in our rotation.

Q. So, the wrecks you basically chalk up to bad equipment?

A. It was a cross between a run of bad luck and not having the best of equipment.

Q. Tell me about the situation involving you moonlighting as a car repo man.

A. The situation at hand is simple mud-slinging. With two weeks to go into the most important election of my life, there is several elements of the (Mike) Hunt campaign tied into the Irish Traveler community, very deeply ... Now let’s go to this particular incident. There’s two incident reports at the Edgefield Sheriff’s Office.

One, I went to a home where I was going to repo a car, off-duty, on my own time, in my own vehicle — that seems to be a question (raised by critics) — in my own vehicle. Discussed it with the wife of the family and made no indication to her that I was a police officer, whatsoever. I left her my number and later on she wants to know (how her husband could contact him). I said, ‘Well, I’ll be working tomorrow.” I gave her my business

card, my Aiken County Sheriff’s Office business card. I said, “I’ll be happy for you all just to call me.” When she sees my business card, the woman just goes berserk: “Oh, Aiken County over here in Edgefield County, blah, blah, blah.” That’s “illusion and confusion,” is what I call it.

That’s just typical Traveler illusion ... And then, there’s a second report in Edgefield County on that day, saying I was running blue lights, stopping vehicles, searching for this one particular guy and searching for this car. That is a lie. That’s an absolute fabrication and it goes along with the other incident report just to create illusion and confusion among the Travelers just to make me look bad or to get Edgefield County to help protect them keeping that truck (Rowland was trying to repossess). No other reason. I was in my personal hunting truck at the time, so it didn’t happen.

Q. Do you think it was OK that you were moonlighting, though, in a job that could have been leant more credibility through your law enforcement role?

A. I understand the question, and I think the answer is, as long as I handled myself appropriately in every situation, I see no problem. And I did that with Sheriff Sellers’ permission. I did that with his knowledge. And realize what we’re talking about. This is not me going out to Elm Circle here and repossessing John Smith’s car who’s behind on his payments. This is the Irish Traveler community. The automobiles were bought with bogus addresses and bogus financial backgrounds, so it’s way outside the box of normal financial situations. A normal repo person could not have ever found them ... However, I’m a nationally recognized Traveler expert. I know those folks as good as they know themselves at times.

Q. I’m assuming this is your first time out into a political race. What’s it been like? Has it been what you’ve expected?

A. This has been the most intense, not-what-I-expected, campaign in my imagination. The first thing my political friends told me is, “You’re going to have to grow some more skin.” Well, I’ve grown so much skin that my back’s about to ridge up like an alligator’s back. And I’m disappointed in that, in a lot of ways. But on the other foot, it’s been the most humbling experience to have total strangers come out of the woodwork and offer to volunteer to help with my campaign because they believe in my background.

AUGUSTA TELEPHONE Celebrating 20 Years

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Arts

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BY LISA JORDAN

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moves you,” said Cohen. “It’s definitely part of my fabric.”

Cohen is currently on tour. When I spoke with her on the phone, she was driving to a gig in Columbia; the night before, she had played an unofficial South by Southwest festival gig in Austin, Texas. By the time she hits Augusta’s Capri Cinema on March 29, Cohen will have opened up for Tonic in Arlington, Va. “I’m just going out all over the country and just putting it out there, and it’s been such a great and cool experience,” Cohen said. “I think I’ve been lucky because everyone has always understood. I think they understand me more through my songs. … I think draping it in melody is one way to bring it to the table and let people listen to it. Nothing so cryptic – I think the universal is really good, but you find this really interesting balance between making it somewhat personal and confessional and balancing it with a melody and the whole concept that, ultimately, you will be singing this song and you will be playing the guitar, and people will be seeing you performing this, so there has to be this element of comfort. I’m not necessarily doing this to work out my personal issues in a public forum. I see this very much as art, very much as music.”

ted to really growing up. I really wanted to do what I wanted to do. I really had the space to take my time to experiment with melodies and recording and different instruments. I got to call a lot of the shots. I definitely am responsible in large part for the production, and it was time

S P I R I T M A R

Benna’s Incandescent Tunes To Grace Capri Cinema s musician Benna Cohen was retrieving her telephone messages, which included one from me, looking to get in touch for an interview, she drove past a road sign that read, “Jordan Lane.”

“So I knew I’d better call you,” she said a few minutes later when we connected over a crackling phone line.

But coincidences involving words and places aren’t anything new to Cohen.

Take, for instance, the sighting of her unusual first name on one of her visits to Malta, home of her mother’s family.

Cohen’s parents, expecting a boy, were planning on naming her Benjamin after her dad’s father, and derived Benna from that and from a dream Cohen’s mother had shortly before she was born.

“The variation on Ben just seemed to work well for everyone,” Cohen said.

“But then Malta just started manufacturing that milk.”

Yep, milk. Malta is also home to Benna Fresh Milk Products.

“I was always shut out of that common denominator thing that everybody’s name is somehow represented,” she said. “I think it’s just so wonderful that in Malta, a place that I love, they have these dairy products.”

But Cohen’s uniqueness doesn’t lie only in her name. You can find it in her music, too. The tracks on her latest album, “What’s Meant To Be,” oscillate between sweet and dreamy and edgy. It’s a CD that feels like spring’s alternately warm and thundery days.

“In some sense, the songs came from a hibernation period anyway,” said Cohen.

“Also, if you want to speak in the sense of analogies, it definitely is a rebirth. I ended a really long relationship prior to going into this; I changed a lot of things in my life out of necessity, and these songs definitely came out of that. That’s what I like about them.”

Another thing that sets “What’s Meant To Be” apart from Cohen’s last album, 1996’s “Greetings From Port Authority,” is the level of involvement Cohen had in its production.

“I was offered a chance by a friend of a friend to go into the studio and just experiment,” she said. “I was kind of commit-

M E T R O

for me to assume that responsibility, too.”

In experimenting, Cohen has come up with unique and beautiful melodies that buoy the lyrics without overpowering them.

“I care a lot about the melody – not just about my melody, but about everybody’s melody. It’s what draws you in and

Other Shows To Catch The next couple weekends have a variety of music in store for Augusta audiences.

If country music is your thing, Travis Tritt is scheduled to play at the Bell Auditorium March 21 at 7:30 p.m.

Tickets are $33.50 for the floor and $29.50 for the balcony. For more information, contact the box office at 7242400. You can purchase tickets through TicketMaster, online at www.ticketmaster.com or by phone at 828-7700.

The weather is warming up – well, in between bouts of rain – and that means that Saturday Night Live on the Riverwalk is coming to life again. The series started last weekend with The Breeze Kings and continues March 29 with live performances by The Sailcats and Juice. The music begins at 7 p.m. If you want more information, contact Riverwalk Special Events at 821-1754.

MUSIC

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24 M E T R O S P I R I T

Arts: Visual

Japonisme Exhibit on the Loose at Morris Museum

By Rhonda Jones

M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

L

adies and gentlemen, step right up! For 50 days only, see Japan and the American South go head-to-head in a headlock of art that will boggle the mind. “Japonisme: The Influence of Japanese Art in the South,” goes up at the Morris Museum of Art on March 23, and lingers until May 11.

Japonisme. So what the heck is Japonisme?

Well, for starters, it’s a term coined by the French in the 1870s to describe the fact that people were going ape over stuff from Japan. It even hit the artists. The artists in the exhibit are from a later date, however, which suggests that Japonisme was not just a passing fad, but left its mark, at least for a little while.

Oh, heck. Maybe it was a passing fad that just wouldn’t give up the ghost for a while.

Laura Pasch, who is the exhibit curator, did not choose artists from the period when the concept was coined.

“Well the artists that I’ve chosen, their work is mostly coming from the 1920s, ‘40s and ‘50s,” she said. “So this is actually coming quite a bit later.”

Frequently, when a curator designs an exhibit around a certain idea, they go right to the heart of it and choose works from the time period when the movement was going strong. But there are other ways to plan an exhibit, and Pasch was going for something a little bit different.

“There are probably lots of other examples I could have found,” she said. “I really went for pieces that showed a direct influence by artists that we know they were studying Japonisme art,” she said.

So what we have potentially in the exhibit is a trickle-down effect.

One area of interest for those who like Japanese art is the woodcut print. The Japanese have been into that sort of thing for a very long time, and are probably the best authorities to go to when an artist becomes interested in the medium. So naturally there will be some bleeding over of Japanese style and subject matter.

Pasch is including a sample of actual Japanese art in the show, which will come in very handy for comparison.

She said that Alice Ravenel Huger Smith, one of the artists featured in the exhibit, actually studied Japanese prints that were part of a collection belonging to her cousin.

“I do have one of the prints in that show.”

“And then another artist, Anna Heyward Taylor, I believe she actually travelled to Japan and studied woodcuts there.”

We asked what in the world Japan and the South have in common that would forge that kind of commonality between the artists, that would make it possible to transfer an artistic genre from one place to another.

“A lot of the prints take nature as their subject matter, which is a very common subject in Japanese art.”

Yep. We do have a lot of pretty flowers here.

The stylistic elements that make up Japanese art, she said, are a specific use of color. If you have seen any Japanese art at all, you will be familiar with the relative two-dimensional quality due to Japanese artists’ use of flat areas of color. Also, Pasch said, they like to use dramatic asymmetrical composition and silhouetting for effect. Dark backgrounds are a favorite element of theirs as well.

“I do have some other prints done in other techniques,” she said. “A couple of those flower prints sort of synthesize American art with Japanese composition.”

As for the media in the exhibition, it’s kind of homogenous. “It’s pretty much all either woodcut print or etchings,” she said.

“It’s all works on paper, obviously.”

“I did include two prints by Japanese artists that compare very well with work by Southern artists,” she added. The compositions are very, very similar, she said, but not exact. “It’s not derivative. They’re not imitating Japanese art, just taking little bits and pieces from Japanese ideas of design and incorporating it into Western style.”

She admits, though, that setting up an exhibit like this has its challenges.

“Looking at Western art and trying to find out what is Japanese about it – it’s actually kind of difficult.”

Her background is on east Asian art, and Japanese art specifically, she said. “I’ve always loved Japanese prints, so this is a fun opportunity to look at other artists who are influenced by them.”

There are 14 pieces in the exhibit, she said.

Pasch will be leading a gallery talk on Sunday, March 23 at 2 p.m. Admission is free.

The exhibit will run until May 11. The pieces are on loan from the Columbia Museum of Art in South Carolina, and also from the Gibbes Museum of Art in Charleston, S.C. For info, call (706) 724-7501.

Other Fun Things at the Morris “Martha Simkins Rediscovered” is still going on at the Morris as well. On March 30 at 2 p.m in the museum auditorium, you can attend a one-woman presentation

by Robin Lane titled “Artful Lives: Living Portraits of Women Artists.”

Admission is free.

Lane is a creative person wearing many hats as actress, author, director and producer. On the 30th, she will be breathing life into Mary Cassatt, an Impressionist painter who lived from 1844 to 1926. For info, again, call (706) 724-7501.

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THE GREATER AUGUSTA ARTS COUNCIL PRESENTS

GARDEN CITY MUSIC FEST Saturday, March 22, 2003 On the Common in Downtown Augusta, GA The Kevn Kinney Band

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Horsepower Russell Joel Brown Jemani Kitty Snyder Shaun Piazza Livingroom Legends Bee’s Knees Jazz Trio Tara Scheyer & the HalfShirt Leroys Eryn Eubanks Bluegrass Band

$7 Advance/$10 at the Gate Advance Tickets Available at The Soul Bar, Nacho Mamas, Metro Coffee House, Lokal Loudness, and The Arts Council Office

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Sponsors: D.Timm's, Metropolitan Spirit, Papa Johns, Augusta Recreation and Parks, Southern Siding and Windows, Georgia Council for the Arts, Coca Cola, Comcast, WRDW News-12, 95 Rock, RedWolf, Inc., Joseph R. Neal Jr., P.C., Trial Lawyer,

Food + Arts & Crafts + 2 Stages of Music with 20 Bands + Beer + Kids Activities

26 M E T R O S P I R I T

Arts: Theatre

Russell Brown on Stage-Kissing and Cursing for Art

By Rhonda Jones

M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

I

magine you’re a young man with big dreams. Imagine you’re in Augusta, and still in college, that you’ve won a part in “The Music Man” and aren’t so sure if the production’s going to fly.

Now imagine that one day a professional actor – someone who has already left Augusta and made a name for himself on New York stages – shows up for rehearsal and is now part of the cast.

If you can go there, you may understand how Augusta State University senior Sean Moton (pictured, left), who is playing the part of Marcellus Washburn, felt when Russell Brown (pictured, right) came to play.

“The whole vibe of the show ... the motivation went up 10 notches, to the roof,” Moton said. “When you walked in,” he told Brown, “everybody got on their game.”

He confessed that Brown’s presence intimidated him at first, partly because Brown learns dance steps with ease, which is a weakness of Moton’s. Partly because Brown is living Moton’s dream here in Augusta. “What you do for a living is what I want to do,” Moton said.

“That was, like, added pressure.”

So what does Moton intend to do about these dreams of his?

His next step, he said, was to try out for a spot at the American Musical and Dramatic Academy in New York. He had an audition in Atlanta planned for the weekend of March 15. But beyond that, he isn’t yet sure how to go about making it happen. “I just need some options,” he said. “I’m not really sure at this point how it’s going to work out.”

“The Music Man” and Other Neat Stuff Brown explained the premise of “The Music Man,” which takes place in River City, Iowa in 1912, and a little about his character, a traveling salesman named Harold Hill.

Hill is a con man. The con, Brown said, is to convince the town that there is a desperate need for a boys’ band. He would, of course, train the lads, who would of course need uniforms. He plans to leave town with the money, but doesn’t plan to be sideswiped by love, care of the local librarian, played by Aiken music student Lisa Tharp.

Harold Hill, Brown said, has never been in love before.

Co-directors Carolyn Cope and Linda Banister approached Brown when the former lead had to give up his role for per-

sonal reasons.

“I jumped at the chance, because it’s a plum role,” Brown said.

“I’ve really been able to spread my wings here as an artist in ways I can’t in New York,” he said, recalling “From Mozart to Motown,” which he produced himself last fall. In the Big Apple, he said, that wouldn’t have been possible cost-wise.

So when the opportunity arose to trans-

form himself into the Music Man, he said, he had to grab it with both hands.

You may be wondering what a man who has had such a long career on the stage can learn from being involved with a college production. Well, plenty, actually.

Brown has never before had an onstage kiss, for one thing.

“I have several kisses in this production,” he said.

He shook his head and chuckled as he related his experience with the word “whistling.” In the Midwest, the directors told him, the “h” is pronounced, which results in the speaker blowing air. He is required to say it mere inches from his leading lady’s face, which can be really interesting, he said, if you’re worried about whether you’ve had your mint.

“So,” Brown said, “we spent 10 minutes on that.”

Setting Limits, Taking Chances Brown is attempting to impress upon Moton the importance of placing himself in uncomfortable situations on stage now, while he’s in a nurturing environment.

Moton has already come up against a situation that made him uncomfortable.

He went after a role in a play that used a great deal of profanity. “The character I was supposed to read for was the one that did most of the cursing,” he said.

Moton gave up the role, he said, because he didn’t feel ready for that sort of thing.

“I don’t know if I’m ready for it now.”

“It was my first show in college,” he added. “I didn’t want my parents to see that.”

Moton said that, though he has heard that an actor needs to be willing to do anything that the stage calls him to do, he feels that an actor has to pick and choose his roles carefully.

“Well, Sean,” Brown said, “I’d have to

say I disagree with that.”

A young actor, Brown explained, needs to challenge himself, especially concerning the things that make him uncomfortable. And now would be the time to do it, he added, because Moton is in a safe environment where the emphasis is on teach-

ing and helping him grow. And, he’s not getting paid.

“Next time someone hands you a role with cursing,” Brown said, “jump at it.”

The seasoned performer, just as expressive off-stage as he is on, gestured as he spoke.

The young actor leaned forward and took it all in. Brown told him that, of course, it is good for a performer to have limits.

“You do have to draw the line somewhere, but don’t let it be at cursing.”

Brown has limits too.

“I refuse to be nude on stage,” he said.

But, he added, if his character needed to wear a dress, he’d do it. “It’s just make-believe.”

He told Moton to turn every role into a learning experience, even if he thought he was working for the worst director in the world, or with the worst co-star. “Find out what it is you’re supposed to learn,” Brown said. “Most of the time we have to figure out in our heads what experiences we need.”

He said that, too often, people put up walls and won’t allow themselves experiences that would help them grow.

Besides, he told Moton, “All scripts curse now.”

Stage smooching isn’t the only new experience that Brown has set himself up for in this production. In New York, he didn’t have the opportunity to work with non-professional actors.

“There were no students at all. It’s really different,” he said. “I was telling somebody last night, ‘Nobody looked up to me in New York.’”

In New York, he said, he was busy looking up to other performers.

“When that whole paradigm gets shifted, and that’s upside down, well you really do have to cross all those T’s and dot all those I’s,” Brown said.

We asked Moton if Brown’s presence makes his dreams more possible to achieve. “Yes,” he said emphatically.

Moton said it’s encouraging to witness the success of someone who comes from the same place he has. “It seems a whole lot less farfetched,” he said of a life as a professional performer.

“I would really like to be that for someone. I really would ... someday.”

If you’d like to see these guys in action, “The Music Man” will be performed at 8 p.m., March 28-29 and at 3 p.m. March 30. Tickets are $15 for reserved seating, $10 general admission, $5 for students and free with a valid ASU ID. For info, call (706) 737-1500.

27 M E T R O S P I R I T

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28 M E T R O S P I R I T

Arts: Dance

Dancers To Be Slain in the Spirit March 27

By Rhonda Jones

M A R

A

ugusta Ballet choreographer Peter Powlus is breathing a sigh of relief. On March 27, you will get a chance to see why.

For about a year and a half now, since the fall of 2001, Augusta Ballet has been the proud parent of a baby ballet company known as AB II. These are the young hopefuls spawned by the Augusta Ballet School. And you will soon get to see them in action.

Now, the seven dancers of AB II are young, but they’re not babies. They range in age from 14 to 17 and are the most serious of the school’s students.

But that’s beside the point. You are probably going crazy right now with curiosity about why Powlus is going to be so happy as a result of this whole thing. Well, he is the choreographer for the Ballet. The only one. March 27 is the date of “The AB II Showcase: Established Repertoire and Emerging Artists.” And although we’ll get to see the young ‘uns, we’ll get to see the work of some up-and-coming choreographers as well, such as ballet master and star of the show Tom Shoemaker, company dancers JJ Stapleton and Natalie Hobizal, AB II member Jessica Gore, and jazz instructor Sarah Shoemaker.

Tom Shoemaker has contributed some pas de deux and assisted with choreography before, Powlus said, but never to this extent. “This is his first complete piece from concept to execution,” Powlus said.

“I’m excited to see that, because Tom has a desire to someday contribute to the company and the choreography.”

Powlus said that can only be good for everyone involved.

“I’m so excited to have other people choreograph around here,” he said. “I expect to learn something from watching other people do choreography and excited about the potential of other people con-

T I R E D

tributing choreography to the company.”

“I just think that it’s important for the dancers and the community to have another choreographer’s vision up there,” he added. “I do my best to stay fresh and not recycle material, but I don’t think there’s any choreographer in the world who can be the only one and keep things interesting.”

He likes the idea of being exposed to others’ visions as well, Powlus said.

So what’s the show going to be like?

Well, Tom Shoemaker is choreographing to a Duke Ellington version of a Thelonius Monk piece. Gore, who is a senior at Greenbrier High School, Powlus said, is choreographing to a piece from the “Brother Where Art Thou?” soundtrack, which is chock full of hillbilly mountain music. (Augusta Ballet already proved to the Augusta audience that ballet and mountain music mix, when mandolin-picker extraordinaire Sam Bush came to town.) Those will be among the six new works performed that evening.

In addition to that, two well-worn pieces from the Ballet’s repertoire will get some play. “Place To Dance,” by Valerie Grieg is set to a Bach concerto. Six of the AB II dancers plus Augusta Ballet veteran Jaime Burcham will dance. Excerpts of “Gift To Be Simple,” by Norbert Vesak, will be performed by all of the AB II members. It is an illustration of the Shaker way of life, and even incorporates traditional Shaker hymns.

Powlus said the dancers would wear traditional Shaker costumes, with “kind of a pioneer look” in hats, vests and long sleeves for the men and layers of material for the women, though he said, “at one point they dance in what appears to be their undergarments.”

I always knew those Shakers were a wild bunch.

He attempted to describe the movements. “Gestural is one idea that comes to mind. A lot of gestures that represent worship and work, tasks that they would do in their everyday life. They were kind of a charismatic religious group. At times they would become slain in the spirit, in a trance state, writhing and rolling about.

It’s kind of challenging for the dancers to let go and not be afraid to look somewhat crazy and foolish.”

Powlus is not terribly familiar with “Place To Dance,” but said that it’s a fun frolic involving tennis outfits.

He said that, once upon a time, before Augusta Ballet was near totally professional as it is now, the younger dancers would frequently be called upon for the company’s major productions. That just doesn’t happen anymore, and so a showcase such as this one is an excellent way

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to expose them to Augusta Ballet’s repertoire.

“That’s why this showcase is so important,” he said. “Those opportunities are fewer.”

He said these young dancers are potentially heading for careers in dance. “Yes, and I think they’re right on the verge,” Powlus said. “They’ve developed really nicely. They’re really close to being able to step into professional roles. They’re really committed and work real hard.

Between school and dancing, I really don’t know how they do it.

“Yes, I would say they are pre-professionals.”

The show happens, as per the headline, on March 27 at 7 p.m. at the Imperial Theatre. The showcase is free and open to the public. For more info, call the Ballet office at (706) 261-0555.

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Augusta

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Arts

Auditions

MOSES HOGAN MEMORIAL CONCERT to be held in May. Russell Joel Brown is looking for soloists of all ages and ethnicities to audition March 30-31. Please prepare a spiritual, preferably by Moses Hogan. To schedule an audition appointment, call 394-4744.

ATHFEST LOOKING FOR MUSICAL ACTS to play one of two outdoor stages during AthFest 2003, June 19-22 in Athens, Ga. Submissions will be accepted through April 1. Georgia ar tists must submit a CD, bio, photo and contact information; ar tists from outside of Georgia must submit the above as well as a $10 check payable to AthFest 2003 per ar tist submit ted. Send submissions to: AthFest 2003, At tn: Outdoor Stage Booking, P.O. Box 327, Athens, GA 30603.

Visit athfest.com for information.

DIRECTORS, ACTORS AND SINGERS WANTED for “The Player’s Showcase” and “Othello,” to be per formed at the Imperial Theatre on July 12. Potential directors should send resumes to EternalNothing@hotmail.com or call Jonathan Marcantoni at 364-5047 for details. Actors should bring two monologues and singers should bring two songs to the Hangnail Gallery at noon March 29. Contact Jonathan Marcantoni at the above number for details.

COWPARADE ATLANTA 2003 CALL TO ARTISTS interested in painting one of 200 life-sized fiberglass cows to decorate Atlanta this summer. Professional and amateur ar tists from throughout Georgia are welcome to submit designs for consideration. Deadline for submissions is March 28. For more information, call (404) 898-2915 or visit the Cow Parade Atlanta Web site at www.cowparadeatlanta.com.

AUGUSTA CHILDREN’S CHOR ALE AUDITIONS for training and per formance choirs open to children in grades 3-8.

Auditions held May 3. Call 826-4718 to schedule an audition appointment.

AUGUSTA CONCERT BAND rehearses Monday evenings and is looking to fill vacancies on most band instruments.

Interested par ties should contact Ben Easter, (803) 2020091 or e-mail bandforaugusta@aol.com.

SWEET ADELINES PEACH STATE CHORUS OPEN REHEARSAL for singers each Thursday at 7 p.m. Held at 600 Mar tintown Road in Nor th Augusta. Contact Mildred Blain at 736-7740 or Mary Norman at (803) 279-6499.

Education

LANDSCAPE AND WATERCOLOR WORKSHOP with Thomas Needham March 29, 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Registration is required.

Contact the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t at 722-5495 for more details.

CLAY POT PAINTING CLASSES with local ar tist Denise Zemora at the Ma xwell Branch Library. Advanced class is March 29, 10:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. $2 fee. For registration information, call 793-2020.

ART CLASSES FOR CHILDREN AND ADULTS at the Ar t Factory. The Ar t Factory also has a homeschool program and scholarships are available. Available programs include voice lesson and pantomime workshops, as well as classes in dance, theater, music, visual ar ts and writing. Call 7310008 for details.

USC-AIKEN MUSIC CONSERVATORY PROGRAM now open.

Students of all ages and experience levels welcome. Private lessons available for musical instruments and voice; instructors are USC-Aiken faculty and have at least a master’s degree in their per formance area. (803) 641-3288.

Exhibitions

“COMICAL STRIPS: A GOLF CARTOON SAMPLER” special exhibition at the Augusta Museum of History March 29-April 20. The exhibit is located in the Special Exhibition Gallery on the second floor. 722-8454.

EXHIBITION BY ANNIE GREENE April 1-30 at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History. Opening reception April 6, 3-5 p.m. Call 724-3576 for information.

“OPTICAL ILLUSIONS 2 — YOU STILL WON’T BELIEVE YOUR EYES” on display in the Knox Gallery at For t Discovery through May 11. 821-0200.

PAINTINGS BY JANE NODINE will be on display at USC-Aiken’s Lower Gallery March 21-May 30. (803) 641-3305.

THE PHOTOGR APHY OF LAURIE LOCKLIEAR will be on display at A Silver Lining through March 31. For more information, call 303-9632.

PHOTOGR APHY AND MIXED-MEDIA PIECES BY SHELLY SCHMIDT will be on display at the Thoroughbred Racing Hall of Fame in Aiken through March 30. For more information, call (803) 642-7650.

“WALTON’S REFLECTIONS: 30 DAYS OF CREATIVE EXPRESSION” features the winning pieces from the Georgia Ar tists With Disabilities 2002-2003 Exhibition, as well as works by local disabled ar tists.

The ar twork will be on display at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital, 1355 Independence Drive, through March 28.

Open to the public and free of charge; however, donations to the Walton Foundation Fund will be accepted.

Call 826-5809 for info.

M E T R O S P I R I T M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

ART CLASSES AND WORKSHOPS are offered year-round at the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t. Classes and workshops are open to toddlers through adults and feature instruction in drawing, painting, photography, pot tery, weaving and sculpture. For a newslet ter or detailed information on registering for classes at the Ger trude Herber t, call 722-5495. The Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t also offers Educational Tours; for information, contact the Education Director at the above telephone number.

CERAMICS CLASSES at the Weeks Center Ceramics House in Aiken. Fees include one class per week and students can choose any class time: Mondays, 9 a.m. to noon or 6-9 p.m.; Tuesdays, 6-9 p.m.; or Wednesdays, 9 a.m. to noon. $30 per month. Call (803) 642-7631 for info.

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March 28 is the deadline for submitting designs for Cow Parade Atlanta. Artists from Georgia may enter, and winning designs will be selected to decorate 200 lifesized fiberglass cows for display in Atlanta this summer. Visit www.cowparadeatlanta.com for details.

AIKEN HIGH SCHOOL STUDENT ART SHOW in the Upper Gallery at USC-Aiken’s Etherredge Center through April 7. For information, call (803) 641-3305.

AUGUSTA STATE UNIVERSITY STUDENT ART EXHIBITIONS in the Fine Ar ts Gallery through March 31.

Call the Fine Ar ts Depar tment at 737-1453 for details.

THE SOUTH CAROLINA QUILT SHOW will be at the Aiken County Historical Museum through April 6. For information, call (803) 642-2015 or (803) 642-2017.

ROBERT BAZEMORE JR. AND ART ROSENBAUM EXHIBITION through April 19 at Mary Pauline Gallery.

For information, call 724-9542.

ART BY STUDENTS OF CAROL KELLY DORN will be at the Gibbs Library throughout March. 863-1946.

PHOTO-BASED SCULPTURE BY SHANNON EVANS will be the first exhibition in the Ger trude Herber t Institute of Ar t’s new third-floor exhibition spaces.

Evans’ work will be on display through March 28.

722-5495.

AGNES MARKWALTER YOUTH ART COMPETITION: In celebration of National Youth Ar t Month, ar twork from students in the CSRA will be on display at the First and Third Floor Galleries at Ware’s Folly through March 28. Call 722-5495 for more information.

“WALKING THE LOG: PAINTINGS BY BESSIE NICKENS” exhibit will be at the Morris Museum of Ar t through May 18. For more information, call 724-7501.

ARTWORK BY BING DAVIS will be on exhibit at the Lucy Craft Laney Museum of Black History through March 30.

For information, call the museum at 724-3576.

PAINTINGS BY DANIEL HAYES will be on display at

the Euchee Creek Library during the month of March.

556-0594.

MARTHA SIMKINS SPECIAL EXHIBITION at the Morris Museum of Ar t through April 20. Call the museum at 7247501 for more information.

AT THE GERTRUDE HERBERT INSTITUTE OF ART: “Recent Works From Youth and Adult Students of the Ger trude Herber t” on display through March 31. Call 722-5495 for more information.

Dance

“AB II SHOWCASE: ESTABLISHED REPERTOIRE AND EMERGING ARTISTS” ballet per formance is free and open to the public. Star ts at 7 p.m. March 27 at the Imperial Theatre. Call the Augusta Ballet at 261-0555.

DAVID HAMILTON will host a series of workshops at the Ballroom Dance Center through March 23. For more information and to reserve a place, call 854-8888.

THE AUGUSTA INTERNATIONAL FOLK DANCE CLUB meets Thursday evenings at 7:30 p.m. No par tners are needed and newcomers are welcome. Line and circle dances are taught.

For location information, call 737-6299.

SECOND SATURDAY DANCE at the Ballroom Dance Center, 225 Grand Slam Drive in Evans, held the second Saturday of every month, 7:30-11 p.m. Dress is casual. Tickets are $10 per person. 854-8888.

AUGUSTA CHAPTER OF THE UNITED STATES AMATEUR BALLROOM DANCERS ASSOCIATION holds a dance the first Saturday of each month, from 7:15 to 11 p.m. Cost is $7 for members and $10 for non-members. Held at the BPOE Facility on Elkdom Cour t. Contact Melvis Lovet t, 733-3890, or Jean Avery, 863-4186, for information.

DANCE CLASSES: Intermediate classes run April 54 SQUARE 14-June 16. Call (803) 642-7631 for more information.

“ARTFUL LIVES: LIVING PORTR AITS OF WOMEN ARTISTS — MARY CASSATT AND THE IMPRESSIONISTS” one-woman play will be presented at the Morris Museum of Ar t March 30 in conjunction with the museum’s Mar tha Simkins special exhibition.

Per formance begins at 2 p.m. and admission is free.

Call 724-7501 for details.

M E T R O

CSRA/AUGUSTA BOGEY-WOOGIE DANCE AND SOCIAL GROUP holds a monthly dance every third Saturday of the month, star ting at 7:30 p.m. There are also meetings every Sunday at 4 p.m. at the Salsa Ruedo Casino and every Wednesday at 7:45 p.m. Men are especially encouraged to S P at tend. For information, phone 650-2396 or 736-3878.

GARDEN FESTIVAL SLIDE LECTURE features slides of the State Botanical Garden in Athens by Hugh and Carol Nourse. Lecture, garden par ty and book signing begin at 2 p.m. March 20 in the Morris Museum of Ar t’s second floor lobby. Admission is $5 for members and $8 for nonmembers. Reservations required. Call 724-7501.

I R SINGLES DANCE each Saturday night from 8-11 p.m. sponI sored by the Christian Social Organization for Single Adults.

T Held at Westside High School. Tickets $5 for members, $7

for non-members, and are available at the door. For more

M A information, contact Doris Heath, 736-3376.

R

SPRING STORYTELLING EXTR AVAGANZA at the Morris Museum of Ar t March 29, April 19 and May 3.

The Tellers of Two Cities present a Saturday morning spring story telling series at 10:30 a.m. Free for members, $3 for adults and $2 for seniors, students and the military; children under 6 free with adult. Call 7247501 for more information.

Music

2 0 “HEROIC MUSIC FOR BR ASS, PERCUSSION AND

ORGAN” concer t will be per formed at 4 p.m. March

2 0 30 in the sanctuary of Saint Paul’s Church. Admission 0 is $10 for adults and free for students and children.

3 For more information, call 724-2485.

“STARLET SERENADE” April 2, 7 p.m., at Davidson Fine Ar ts School’s Beverly Barnhar t Theater. Tickets are $5 adults, $4 senior citizens and children under 5 and $3 for Davidson students. 823-6924, ex t. 118.

GARDEN CITY MUSIC FESTIVAL March 22, noon to 10 p.m. at Augusta Common. Two stages will host 20 local and out-of-town acts throughout the day. Gates open at 11 a.m. and tickets are $7 in advance, $10 at the gate. For more information, call the Greater Augusta Ar ts Council at 826-4702.

“MUSIC TO THE PEOPLE” Augusta Symphony Concer t featuring light classical and Broadway music March 31, 7:30 p.m. Held in the Nor th Augusta High School Auditorium. Tickets are $12. For information, call the Augusta Symphony at 826-4705.

CONCERT FOR VIOLIN AND PIANO features violinist Claire Michaels Murray and pianists Ar temisis Thevaos and Lydia Porro and will be held at St. Mary Help of Christians Catholic Church in Aiken. March 23 concer t begins at 5 p.m. and a reception will follow the concer t. Tickets are $10 and proceeds benefit the Aiken Choral Society. Tickets are available at the Wine Cellar; call (803) 649-9463 for information.

BROADWAY DELIGHTS CONCERT AND RECEPTION with the Columbia County Choral Society March 28, 7:30 p.m., at Wesley United Methodist Church in Evans. Tickets are $8 for adults and $6 for students and seniors. For information, visit www.ccchoralsociety.org or call 364-5920.

AUGUSTA JAZZ PROJECT CHAMBER JAZZ CONCERT March 29, 8 p.m., at the Unitarian Church. For information, call 823-0620.

UNITED STATES ARMY BAND IN CONCERT March 23, 3:00 p.m., at the Bell Auditorium. Free and open to the public. For more information, call 722-3521.

“RITES OF SPRING” is par t of the Augusta Symphony’s Por t folio of Par ties. Held March 21.

For an informational packet, contact the Symphony at 826-4705.

ADVANCE TICKETS NOW ON SALE for show with The Big Might y and special guests Days of Haze.

Show is April 4 at Lake Olmstead’s Barbecue Pit. Only 250 tickets are available for this all-ages show, and the per formance will be recorded for an upcoming Big Might y release. Tickets will be available at Lokal Loudness and CDs and More, as well as on www.bigmight y.com.

“TOSCA” will be presented by the Augusta Opera March 20 and 22 at 7:30 p.m. and March 23 at 3 p.m.

Tickets are $12-$40 with student and senior discounts available. Per formed in Italian with English super titles.

For tickets, call 826-4710.

COMMUNITY HEALING MEDITATION DRUMMING CIRCLE hosted ever y third Monday of the month by IDRUM2U, the Not Gaddy Drumming Studio. Held 7-9 p.m. at the G.L. Jackson Conference Center, 1714 Nor th Leg Cour t. Fee is $5 or a donation of canned goods for the Golden Har vest Food Bank. All are welcome and drums will be available to rent. For info, phone the Not Gaddy Drumming Studio, 228-3200.

Theater

“FOOTLOOSE” at Aquinas High School March 27-30, 7:30 p.m., in the school’s gym. Sunday night show is a desser t show. For tickets, call 736-5516.

“CHARLOTTE’S WEB” will be per formed by the Augusta Players Children’s Wing March 28-30 at

This year’s Aiken Steeplechase is set for March 22.

Westside High School. Per formances are 7 p.m.

Friday, 5 p.m. Saturday and 3 p.m. Sunday. Tickets are $8 adult and $6 children 12 and under. 826-4707.

“COMPANY,” per formed by the USC-Aiken University Theatre Players, will be at the university’s Etherredge Center April 3-5 at 8 p.m. and April 6 at 3 p.m. For ticket information, call (803) 641-3305.

“BYE BYE BIRDIE” will be presented by Greenbrier High School March 27-28 at 7 p.m. and March 29 at 3 and 7 p.m. Tickets are $6. For info, call 650-6040.

“THE WIZARD OF OZ” will be per formed by the Davidson Fine Ar ts School Drama Depar tment in the school’s Beverly Barnhar t Theater March 27-29, 7 p.m. Tickets are $8 adult, $6 for seniors and kids under 12 and $5 for DFA students. For more information, call Elizabeth Walper t or Heather Davidson at 823-6924, ex t. 136.

“CHEAPER BY THE DOZEN” will be presented by the Young Ar tists Reper tory Theatre Company March 2123 at the Bon Air Ballroom. Friday and Saturday shows are at 8 p.m., and Saturday and Sunday matinees are at 3 p.m. Tickets are $12 for adults and $10 for students, with group discounts available. For more information, call 210-8915.

“THE MUSIC MAN,” starring Russell Brown, will be per formed March 28-30 at the Ma xwell Per forming Ar ts Theatre. ASU Theatre and Opera Workshop are put ting on the per formances Friday and Saturday evenings at 8 p.m. and Sunday at 3 p.m. To reserve tickets, or for more information, contact Linda Banister, 667-4876, or Leza Wetherington, 737-1500.

“THE BUTLER DID IT” will be at the Abbeville Opera House March 21 and 22 at 8 p.m. Tickets are $15 for adults and $14 for seniors and children. For reservations, call (864) 459-2157.

Attractions THE BOYHOOD HOME OF WOODROW WILSON: Circa 1859 Presby terian manse occupied by the family of President Woodrow Wilson as a child during the Civil War and Reconstruction. Original and period antiques, restored house, kitchen and carriage house. 419 Seventh Street.

Open 10 a.m.-5 p.m., Tues.-Sat. Tours available; groups of 10 or more by appointment only. Admission is $5 adults, $4 seniors, $3 students under 18 and free for ages five and under. 722-9828.

AUGUSTA GOLF & GARDENS OF THE GEORGIA GOLF HALL OF FAME features beautiful display gardens, as well as bronze sculptures of some of golf’s greatest masters.

Available for rent for a variety of functions. Group discount rates available. Closed Mondays; open from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.

Tues.-Sat.; open from 1 to 5 p.m. on Sunday. New spring and summer hours begin March 21: open Tues.-Sat. 9 a.m.9 p.m. and Sundays 11 a.m.-7 p.m. Admission is $5.50 for adults; $4.50 for students, seniors and military; $3.50 for children (4 to 12); free for children 3 and under. Sundays are two for one with a Super Sunday coupon. Annual garden memberships are available. Call 724-4443 or 1-888-8744443. Also, visit their Web site at www.gghf.org.

NATIONAL SCIENCE CENTER’S FORT DISCOVERY: Children and adults alike can immerse themselves in the wonders of science through live demonstrations, vir tual realities, Starlab, KidScape and more than 250 hands-on exhibits. General Admission: $8 for adults; $6 for children, seniors and active military. Group rates available. Operating hours: Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Sunday, noon-5 p.m. Call 821-0200, 1-800325-5445 or visit their Web site at www.NationalScienceCenter.org.

REDCLIFFE STATE HISTORIC SITE: 1859 mansion of S.C. Governor James Henry Hammond, held by the family for three generations until 1975. Hours are 9 a.m.-6 p.m., Thursday-Monday on the grounds. House tours are noon-3 p.m. by appointment. Closed Tuesday and Wednesday.

Admission to the grounds is free. Fee for house tours is $3 for adults and children ages 6 to 17. For more information, call (803) 827-1473. 181 Redcliffe Road, Beech Island.

SACRED HEART CULTURAL CENTER is offering tours of its 100-year-old building. Mon.-Fri., 9 a.m.-5 p.m. $1 per person, children free. 826-4700.

HISTORIC COTTON EXCHANGE WELCOME CENTER: Open Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-6 p.m.; Sun. 1-5 p.m. Riverwalk. Free.

724-4067.

THE EZEKIEL HARRIS HOUSE: Deemed “the finest 18th century house surviving in Georgia” by the “Smithsonian Guide to Historic America.” Open Saturday, 10 a.m.-1 p.m. General admission is $2; senior admission is $1 and children get in for 50 cents. For more information, call 724-0436.

Museums

“THE SIMKINS FAMILY OF EDGEFIELD” lecture presentation by historian Bet tis Rainsford 7 p.m. April 3 at the Morris Museum of Ar t. Free admission. 724-7501.

APRIL BROWN BAG HISTORY SERIES at the Augusta Museum of History is “An Overview of the History of Waynesboro.” Rober t L. Hammond will present the lecture at noon April 2. Program is free to museum members and $2 for non-members; reservations are required. Bring a lunch and the museum provides a beverage and desser t. Call 722-8454 by April 1 to reserve your place.

“TERR A COGNITA: CONTEMPOR ARY VISUAL EXPRESSIONS IN THE SOUTH BY DAVID CHUNG” at the Morris Museum of Ar t March 27. 6 p.m. multimedia presentation with reception to follow.

Admission is $3 adults, $2 seniors, students and militar y. Free for museum members and ASU students and facult y. 724-7501.

“BLACK WOMEN AND THE POLITICS OF THE WOMEN’S SUFFR AGE MOVEMENT” lecture is par t of the History Lecture Series at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History. Dr. Valethia Watkins Beat ty is the featured speaker. Program held at 5 p.m. March 29 at the Lucy Craf t Laney Conference Center. For more information, contact Carl Prescot t at 724-3576.

“JAPONISME: THE INFLUENCE OF JAPANESE ART IN THE SOUTH” gallery talk March 23, 2 p.m., at the Morris Museum of Ar t. Admission is free. The accompanying exhibit will be on display at the museum through May 11. 724-7501.

THE GERTRUDE HERBERT INSTITUTE OF ART in Ware’s Folly exhibits works by local and regional ar tists. Ar t classes, workshops and other educational programming for children, youth and adults are held in the Walker-Mackenzie Studio. Ware’s Folly galleries open Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m.; Thursday, 10 a.m.-7 p.m.; and Saturday by appointment only. The Walker-Mackenzie Studio gallery is open Tuesday-Friday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Admission is free, but a donation of $2 for adults and $1 for children and seniors is encouraged. Call 722-5495 for more info.

THE AUGUSTA MUSEUM OF HISTORY hosts permanent exhibition “Augusta’s Story,” an award-winning exhibit encompassing 12,000 years of local history.

For the younger crowd, there’s the Susan L. Still Children’s Discovery Gallery, where kids can learn about history in a hands-on environment. The museum also shows films in the History Theatre and hosts a variety of programs. Located at 560 Reynolds Street.

Open Tuesday-Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Sunday 1-5 p.m. Admission is $4 adult, $3 seniors, $2 kids (6-18 years of age) and free for children under 6. Free admission on Sundays. Call 722-8454 or visit www.augustamuseum.org for more information.

THE MORRIS MUSEUM OF ART hosts exhibitions and special events year-round. Open Tuesday-Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. and Sundays, noon-5 p.m. Closed on Mondays and major holidays. 1 Tenth Street, Augusta.

Call 724-7501 or visit www.themorris.org for details.

THE MUSEUM OF LAUREL AND HARDY OF HARLEM, GEORGIA features displays of various Laurel and Hardy memorabilia; films also shown. Located at 250 N. Louisville Street in downtown Harlem. Open 1-4 p.m. Thursday-Monday. For more information, call 556-3448.

LUNCH AT NOON LECTURE SERIES held the second Wednesday of every month at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History, 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Call the museum at 724-3576 for more information.

Special Events BABYFEST at University Hospital March 30, 12:15-5 p.m., is designed for new and expectant parents and grandparents.

Free educational classes and materials will be provided by pediatricians and infant care medical specialists. Held in the Levi W. Hill III Auditorium. For more information, call 7742825.

SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE ON THE RIVERWALK March 29 features live performances by The Sailcats and Juice beginning at 7 p.m., as well as food, ar ts and crafts and children’s amusements. For more information, contact Riverwalk Special Events at 821-1754.

“WHAT I’VE LEARNED ABOUT U.S. FOREIGN POLICY: THE WAR AGAINST THE THIRD WORLD” will be shown March 22 as par t of the Progressive Film Series. Screening begins at 5 p.m. in Room E150 of ASU’s Allgood Hall. For information, contact progfilm@hotmail.com.

GEORGIA STATE MIDDLE SCHOOL SCIENCE OLYMPIAD will be at Augusta State University March 22. Events begin at 9 a.m. across campus. for a list of events and times, visit www.aug.edu/~bwellnitz/schedule2003.html or call Bill Wellnitz at 731-7993.

“CHALKING THE WALK” SIDEWALK ARTS FESTIVAL March

DISCUSSION ON THE VIEWS OF AFRICAN-AMERICAN WOMEN IN THE CONTEXT OF HIV/AIDS entitled “How Much Will It Cost Me? A Qualitative Work Examining the Views, the Feelings and the Beliefs of African-American Women in the Contex t of HIV/AIDS” will be held at Augusta State University March 20,10-11:15 a.m. Held in Room A4 of Skinner Hall. For info, contact Pam Hayward, 729-2048.

PICKENS-SALLEY SYMPOSIUM to honor the contributions of Southern women and explore the life of Lucy Holcombe Pickens will take place at USC-Aiken March 24. Panel discussion at 4 p.m., with 5:30 p.m. open house at the PickensSalley House and an 8 p.m. evening lecture. Reception and book signing to follow. Free and open to the public. For information, contact Deidre Mar tin, (803) 641-3448.

PHINIZY SWAMP NATURE PARK DAWN WALK March 29, 57:30 a.m. Par ticipants will hike through the wetlands and welcome a new day. Contribution is $3 for members and $5 for non-members. Registration deadline is March 27. 828-2109.

NORTH AUGUSTA COUNCIL OF GARDEN CLUBS TEA AND FASHION SHOW to be held March 29, 2-4 p.m., at the Nor th Augusta Community Center. Tickets are $10 and may be purchased by March 21 at the Nor th Augusta Chamber of Commerce, Bush Flowers and Jim Bush Flower Shop. For more information, contact Linda Smiley, 279-5074.

“AROUND THE DAY IN 80 WORLDS” FOREIGN FILM FESTIVAL at USC-Aiken. “Life and Debt in Jamaica” will be screened at 6 p.m. March 25 and 28. For more information, call (803) 641-3448.

ANTI-FREEZ BEER CAN AND BREWERIANA COLLECTABLES SHOW, sponsored by the Atlantic Chapter of the Beer Can Collectors of America, features brewery items, collectibles, vintage beer cans and more. Open 8 a.m.-2 p.m. March 22 at the Belair Conference Center. Admission is $2. For more information, contact Matt Parker at 855-6397 or antifreezcanshow@yahoo.com.

SACRED HEART GARDEN FESTIVAL March 20-23 at Sacred Hear t Cultural Center. Garden exhibits, floral design displays, lectures and a walking tour of some of Augusta’s private gardens will be featured. March 20 slide tour of the State Botanical Gardens will be at the Morris Museum of Ar t with an evening garden par ty to follow at Sacred Hear t. For more information, call 826-4700, visit www.sacredhear taugusta.org or e-mail shear t@knology.net.

SANDHILLS WRITERS CONFERENCE March 20-22 at Augusta State University. All readings are free and open to the public. Keynote address by Doug Marlet te 11 a.m. March 20; reading with Rober t Olmstead and Rosemary Daniell 7:45 p.m. March 20; reading with Doug Marlet te and Tommy Hays 7:45 p.m. March 21; open mic reading 10 p.m. March 21. For more information, visit www.sandhills.aug.edu or call 737-1636.

FREE TAX ASSISTANCE AND TAX PREPAR ATION at Volunteer Income Ta x Assistance sites throughout Augusta. Contact the Mayor’s Of fice for Work force Development at 821-1834.

HEALTH CAREERS OPPORTUNITY PROGR AM is accepting applications for its six-week summer academic enrichment program through April 1. The program is designed to provide students from underrepresented groups and/or disadvantaged backgrounds with an oppor tunity to enter and graduate from schooling in health professions. Open to qualified rising high school seniors and pre-college freshmen interested in pursing a healthcare career. 821-8203.

MARCH FILM SERIES at Headquar ters Library Tuesdays at 6:30 p.m. Admission is free. March 25 screening of “Bot tle Rocket.” For information, call 821-2600.

2003 CULLUM LECTURE SERIES at Augusta State University: The title of this year’s series is “Frontiers in Motion: U.S.-Latin American and Caribbean Borderlands.” On March 25, two movies will be shown in Butler Lecture Hall: “ Y Tu Mama Tambien” at 11:15 a.m. and “Sugar Cane Alley” at 7 p.m. On March 28, Kay Morris and the Jewels will per form at 7:30 p.m. at the Physical Education/Athletic Complex.

For more information, visit www.aug.edu/library/cullum2003.

MCDUFFIE FRIENDS OF ANIMALS holds pet adoptions each Saturday, 1-3 p.m. at Superpetz on Bobby Jones Expressway. Call 556-9090 or visit www.pet finder.com.

COLUMBIA COUNTY HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. and every Sunday from 1 to 4 p.m. at PetsMar t. For more info, call 860-5020.

RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL AND AUGUSTA ANIMAL RESCUE FRIENDS holds pet adoptions at Superpetz

off Bobby Jones Expressway every Sunday from 1 to 4 p.m. Call AARF at 364-4747 or visit www.aar f.net.

Adoptions also held at the Richmond County Animal Control Shelter, Tues. through Sun., 1-5 p.m. Call the shelter at 7906836.

LOW-COST RABIES VACCINATIONS: Augusta-Richmond County Animal Control holds low-cost rabies vaccination clinics the four th Sunday of every month for privately owned pets. $8 per animal. 1 p.m. at Superpetz. Dogs must be on a leash and cats in a carrier. Puppies and kit tens must be three months old and current for all vaccinations. Schedule subject to change, so please call 790-6836 to verify dates and times.

THE CSRA HUMANE SOCIETY holds pet adoptions every Saturday from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. and every Wednesday evening from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. at the Pet Center located behind the GreenJackets Stadium on Milledge Rd. 261PETS.

Out of Town

“ALADDIN” will be presented by the Columbia City Ballet at the Koger Center for the Ar ts in Columbia, S.C., March 2122. For tickets, call (803) 251-2222.

“JOHNNY MERCER: TOO MARVELOUS FOR WORDS” concer t at the Georgia Music Hall of Fame in Macon, Ga., March 24-26. For information, call 1-888-GA-ROCKS. “CRIMES OF THE HEART” will be presented by the Alliance Theatre Company on the Alliance Stage in Atlanta through April 20. Tickets are $17-$46; $10 tickets available for those under 25 years of age. Call (404) 733-5000 or visit www.alliancetheatre.org.

“CLEMENT GREENBERG: A CRITIC’S COLLECTION” is on display at the Columbia Museum of Ar t in Columbia, S.C., through June 17. (803) 799-2810.

“A RAISIN IN THE SUN” through April 13 at Class Act Theatre in Mariet ta, Ga. For tickets, call (770) 579-3156.

“JULIUS CAESAR” at the New American Shakespeare Tavern in Atlanta through April 6. Tues.-Sat. per formances at 7:30 p.m.; Sunday per formances at 6:30 p.m. Ticket prices range from $10-$24.50, depending on the day of the week. Group discounts available. Optional British pub-style menu offered one hour and fif teen minutes before the show. For reservations, call (404) 874-5299.

“FLOWERS/NEW YORK” PHOTOGRAPHY BY JAY STRAUSS will be on display at Steve Wiley Photography in Savannah through March 22. For information, call (912) 234-2777.

“WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE: MAURICE SENDAK IN HIS OWN WORDS AND PICTURES” exhibit at the Richland County Public Library in Columbia, S.C., through May 18.

(803) 799-9084.

“A VOICE OF THEIR OWN: BLACK CLASSICAL MUSIC IN GEORGIA” EXHIBIT through May 26 at the Georgia Music Hall of Fame in Macon, Ga. Call 1-888-GA-ROCKS. THE HIGH MUSEUM OF ART’S FOLK ART AND PHOTOGRAPH GALLERIES host two exhibitions through Aug. 9: “Land of Myth and Memory: Clarence John Laughlin and Photographers of the South” and “Faces and Places: Picturing the Self in Self-Taught Ar t.” Call (404) 577-6940.

AT THE GEORGIA MUSEUM OF ART in Athens, Ga., through March 23: “There Is No Eye: Photographs by John Cohen” and “Visualizing the Blues: Images of the American South, 1862-1999.” Call (706) 542-4662 for information.

“FOR THIS WORLD AND BEYOND: AFRICAN ART FROM THE FRED AND RITA RICHMAN COLLECTION” through May 25 at the High Museum of Ar t in Atlanta.

Call (404) 733-HIGH or visit www.high.org for info.

TICKETS FOR “VAREK AI,” a production by the Cirque du Soleil, now on sale. Shows per formed through March 30 at Cumberland Galleria in Atlanta. Visit www.cirquedusoleil.com for more information.

“PARIS IN THE AGE OF IMPRESSIONISM: MASTERWORKS FROM THE MUSEE D’ORSAY” will be at the High Museum of Ar t in Atlanta now through March 16.

This exhibition marks the first time since the Orsay opened that pieces in its collection have traveled to the U.S. For more information, visit www.ParisinAtlanta.org, www.high.org, or call (404) 733-HIGH.

Benefits BOYS AND GIRLS CLUBS OF AUGUSTA 16TH ANNUAL STEAK AND BURGER DINNER March 24, 6:30 p.m. at the

55

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The Stage schedule for the Garden City Music Festival is on page 66

Voted Best Steak In Augusta For 15 Years 1987-2002

M E T R O S P I R I T M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

2856 Washington Rd. 73-STEAK 1654 Gordon Hwy. 796-1875

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29, 3-6 p.m. in Lincolnton. For more information, contact the Lincolnton-Lincoln County Chamber of Commerce, 359-7970.

JOIN US

Girls In Motion: Come Explore the Possibilities & Unlimited Potential for Fun at Girls Incorporated Master’s® Camp 2003.

WHAT: Master’s® Camp for girls kindergarten – high school WHEN: April 7-11, 7:30am until 5:30pm PRICE: $70 for the week + $35 annual membership fee ( Includes field trips, breakfast, lunch and afternoon snacks)

ACTIVITIES: Movie at Regal Cinema, Phinizy Swamp, Skating at

Stardust Skate Center, Funsville Amusement Park, Swimming, Cookout & Carnival, Magic Show, Dance Classes

* There will be 30-minute Dance Production for Parents at end of week

RSVP: 733-2512 I N S P I R I N G A L L G I R L S TO B E ST R O N G , S M A R T & B O L D

Covenant Presbyterian Church OPEN HEARTS, OPEN MINDS, OPEN DOORS

Sunday Services

8:30 am Communion 9:45am Church School 11:00am Worship Service

Wednesday Night Fellowship 5:45pm Nursery provided for all church events Rev. Rob Watkins, Pastor 3131 Walton Way (Corner of Walton Way & Aumond Rd) 733-0513 A PC (USA) Congregation

State University Athletic Complex. Guest speaker is 56 Augusta Eddie Lee Ivery. Tickets are $100 per person; corporate M E T R O S P I R I T

table sponsorships star t at $1000 for a table of six. For tickets and information, call 736-6498 or the Steak and Burger Hotline, 284-3524.

CSRA HUMANE SOCIETY SPEND THE NIGHT IN JAIL fundraiser March 29. Lock up begins at 7 p.m., with food, drink, videos and games included, as well as a continental breakfast. Bail is $25, plus an additional amount to unlock the gate early. To avoid overcrowding, please make reservations by calling Raynet te Mayer or Deborah Herring at 261-PETS. APPLICATIONS FOR THE 2003 COMBINED FEDERAL CAM-

M A PAIGN will be accepted from nonprofit, human health and R welfare agencies with 501c(3) ta x-exempt status through

April 14. Selected local agencies will receive donations

2 raised Sept.1-Oct. 15 by federal employees. For applications, 0 call 724-5544 or e-mail bend@uwcsra.org.

Donations accepted during regular business hours, Tues.Sun., 1-5 p.m. at the shelter, 4164 Mack Lane. Call 7906836 for information.

SHEPEARD COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER BLOOD DRIVES in various locations around the CSRA this month. The blood center is urging people of all blood types to donate in order to combat a blood supply shor tage. For detailed information on locations and times to donate, visit www.shepeardblood.org. You may also call Susan Edwards at (803) 6437996 for information on Aiken locations and Nancy Szocinski at 737-4551 for information on all other locations.

AMERICAN RED CROSS BLOOD DRIVES at the Aiken Red Cross Blood Center on Millbrook Drive and the Augusta Red Cross Blood Center on Pleasant Home Road. The bloodmobile will also stop at various area locations this week. For a complete list, call the Aiken Blood Center at (803) 642-5180 or the Augusta Blood Center at 868-8800.

Learning GRANT WRITING WORKSHOPS: Intermediate-level workshop March 21, 8 a.m.-3 p.m., $100; Beginner-level workshop March 28, 8 a.m.-2:30 p.m., $75. Registration required; call JLJ Resources, a local non-profit organization, at 210-2547.

“HISTORY OF AIKEN” COURSE at USC-Aiken Tuesdays, April 1-22, 6:30-7:30 p.m. Fee is $35 per person. (803) 641-3288.

FINANCIAL WORKSHOP on fraud and embezzlement and IRS audits March 21, 9 a.m.-1 p.m. Held at the Georgia Depar tment of Labor Conference Room, 601 Greene Street.

Cost is $25 per person. Call Brenda Mor ton at 821-1323 to register.

“TAMING THE WILD CHILD” PARENTING CLASS March 22, 9 a.m.-3 p.m. at USC-Aiken. Discover how to recognize and understand the motivation behind misbehavior and appropriate ways to respond, as well as how to increase instructional time and positive interaction. Cost is $82 per person or $125 per couple and includes lunch. (803) 641-3288.

STUDY SKILLS FOR HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS course available to high schoolers looking to improve study skills through methods such as goal set ting, time management, note taking and more. Held March 21, 1-4:30 p.m. at USCAiken’s Penland Administration Building, Room 110. Cost is $50. (803) 641-3288.

UNIVERSITY OF GEORGIA SMALL BUSINESS OUTREACH SERVICES SMALL BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT WORKSHOPS held this month at the center’s Augusta offices: Smar t Marketing March 20, 6:30-8:30 p.m.; Writing a Business Plan March 25, 6:30-8:30 p.m. All workshops are $35. 737-1790.

BRIDGE CLASSES at the H.O. Weeks Center in Aiken.

Intermediate class is held March 25-May 20. Cost is $20 per person, plus a $14 materials fee that must be paid at the first class. Call (803) 642-7631 for information.

USC-AIKEN CONTINUING EDUCATION offers the following courses: Debt Free Living, Computer Courses and more.

USC-Aiken also offers Education to Go classes online. Call the Office of Continuing Education at (803) 641-3288.

AUGUSTA STATE UNIVERSITY CONTINUING EDUCATION is now offering the following classes: Language Series, Computer Literacy I, Basic ICD-9 Coding, SAT Review Courses, Reflexology with Aromatherapy, Ice Skating, Yoga Intensive and more. Also, ASU offers online courses. For more information, call 737-1636 or visit www.ced.aug.edu.

AIKEN TECH CONTINUING EDUCATION offers the following

Photo by Brian Neill

2 0 AUGUSTA-RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL is in 0 need of dog and cat food, cat lit ter and other pet items, as 3 well as monetary donations to help pay for vaccinations.

The Augusta Rugby club is always on the lookout for new members. For more information, visit www.augustarugby.org. courses: Windows 2000, Microsof t Word, Microsof t Excel, Health Care Career Courses, Genealogy, Professional Cooking, Real Estate Courses, Floral Design, Driver Education and more. Aiken Tech also offers Education to Go classes online. For more information or to register, call (803) 593-9231, ex t. 1230.

Health TOBACCO-FREE JAMBOREE to celebrate Kick But ts Day and raise awareness of the dangers of tobacco use to be held April 2, 5-7 p.m., at Dogwood Terrace Boys and Girls Club.

Fun and educational events available for area youth. Open to the public. For more information, call 667-4297.

AMERICAN CANCER SOCIETY’S “I CAN COPE” PROGRAM offered to those diagnosed with cancer, their family and friends. Each two-hour session addresses a variety of topics, including diagnosis, treatments, side effects, nutrition and more. Held 6:30 p.m. April 1, 15, 22 and 29 at Warren Baptist Church. The program is provided free of charge, but registration is encouraged. Call 731-9900 or 1-800-ACS2345.

USC-AIKEN HEALTH AND FITNESS FAIR March 26, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. is free and open to the public. Free screenings and health information will be provided. Held in the Student Activities Center Gym. For info, call (803) 641-3277.

“I DESERVE RESPECT: FINDING AND HEALING SHAME IN PERSONAL RELATIONSHIPS” free health education class March 27, 2:30 p.m. To enroll, call 733-0188, ex t. 7989.

FREE ADULT CPR CLASS March 29, 9 a.m.-1 p.m., at Abilene Baptist Church. Sponsored by the American Red Cross of Augusta. Registration is limited to the first 125 interested persons, so call 724-8483 to reserve a space.

NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS: If you want to stop using any drugs, there is a way out. Help is available at no cost. Call the Narcotics Anonymous help line for information and meeting schedules at 855-2419.

CPR AND FIRST AID TRAINING COURSES AT THE AUGUSTA RED CROSS: CPR for the Professional Rescuer Review March 25, 6-10 p.m. Held at the Augusta Red Cross office, 1322 Ellis St. To register, call 724-8483.

DIET COUNSELING CLASSES for diabetics and those with high cholesterol at CSRA Par tners in Health, 1220 Augusta West Parkway. Free. Call 860-3001 for class schedule.

PROJECT LINK COMMUNITY LECTURE SERIES is held the first Tuesday of every month and is sponsored by the MCG Children’s Medical Center. Project Link provides educational resources and guidance for families who have children with developmental delays, disabilities and other specialized health concerns. April 1 topic is “Transitioning From Babies Can’t Wait to the Public School Set ting.” Free and open to the public; takes place from 6:30-8 p.m. in the main conference room at the Children’s Medical Center. Call 721-6838 for information.

UNIVERSITY HEALTH CARE SYSTEM COMMUNITY EDUCA-

TION holds workshops, seminars and classes on a variety of topics: weight and nutrition, women’s health, cancer, diabetes, seniors’ health and more. Suppor t groups and health screenings are also offered. Call 736-0847 for details.

PEACHCARE FOR KIDS AND RIGHT FROM THE START MEDICADE of fers free or low-cost health coverage to qualifying families. Coverage includes prenatal care, hospitalization, vaccines, dental and vision care and is available to pregnant women of all ages and to children through age 19. Contact the RSM Project at 729-2086 or 721-5611 for information.

YOGA CLASSES at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital are held on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 7-8 a.m. for $45/month or 10:30 a.m. to noon for $55/month. Call 823-6294.

FREE HIV/AIDS TESTING every Tuesday from 4 to 7 p.m. at St. Stephen’s Ministry, 922 Greene Street. Free anonymous testing, pre- and post-test counseling and education.

HATHA YOGA CLASSES at the St. Joseph Home Health Care Center in Daniel Village Plaza. Held 10 a.m. to noon Monday, Wednesday and Friday and 6:30-8:30 p.m. Monday through Thursday. $10 per class or $60 a month for unlimited classes. Mats are provided, but bring a towel and a water bot tle.

Call Tess at 738-2782 for more information.

A FREE WOMEN’S HEALTH CLINIC is held from 6-8 p.m. on Tuesdays at the Salvation Army and Welfare Center, 1383 Greene St. Services include Pap smear, breast exam and the diagnosis and treatment of sexually transmit ted diseases.

For more info or an appointment, call the St. Vincent dePaul Health Center at 828-3444.

W.G. WATSON, M.D., WOMEN’S CENTER CONDUCTS EDUCATION CLASSES at University Hospital. Course topics include Lamaze, breast feeding, parenting and grandparenting. Par tners will learn positive suppor t techniques. There are also programs designed to help older siblings adjust to new family members. Some classes are free, while others require a fee. Registration is required by calling 774-2825.

Kids EASTER EGG-STR AVAGANZA FAMILY NIGHT drop-in at the Family Y’s Camp Lakeside April 3, 5-7 p.m.

Activities include a hayride, Easter egg hunt, educational activities, marshmallow roast and more. $5 per person fee. For details, contact Scot t Rouse, 733-1030.

“THE PRINCESS AND THE PEA,” April 1-5 at Ma xwell Per forming Ar ts Theatre, is presented by Storyland Theatre. School per formances Tuesday-Friday at 9:30 a.m., 10:45 a.m. and 12:15 p.m. Student ticket price is $3.50; teachers and chaperones are free. Reservations required. Saturday family matinee tickets are $4 per person; no reservations required. 736-3455.

FAMILY AND BABY FAIR March 22, 11 a.m.-4 p.m. at Julian Smith Casino. Free and open to the public. For more information, call (803) 279-2330.

“LARRY CAT IN SPACE” program at the Dupont

Planetarium on the USC-Aiken Campus March 21-22 at 7 and 8 p.m. Tickets are $4 adult, $3 seniors, $2 for K-12 students and $1 for USC-Aiken faculty and staf f. For information and reservations, call (803) 6413769, (803) 641-3654 or (803) 278-1967, ex t. 3654.

CAMP BREATHE EASY, the American Lung Association of Georgia’s camp for children with asthma, will be held June 1-7 at Camp Twin Lakes in Rutledge, Ga. The camp is open to children with asthma who need daily medication and are limited in summer camping oppor tunities. Week-long asthma day camps are also of fered later in the summer in Albany, Augusta and Columbus. The deadline for camp registration is March 24. For information, call (770) 4345864 or 1-800-LUNG-USA. UNDERWATER EGG HUNT open to children ages 6-12 at the Family Y Wheeler Indoor Aquatics Center March 29. From noon to 3 p.m., kids can search for prize eggs in the pool, jump on the moon bounce, get their faces painted and visit with the Easter Bunny.

Par ticipants must bring swimsuits and towels. Phone 738-6678 for information.

PHINIZY SWAMP NATURE PARK FAMILY DISCOVERY SERIES program on tur tles March 20, 5:30-7 p.m. at the park’s Pharmacia Pavilion. Bring a picnic dinner.

Call 828-2109 for more information.

STORYTIME IN THE GARDENS every Tuesday, 4 p.m., March-May. Senior citizens will read favorite children’s stories to kids 8 and under at Hopeland Gardens in Aiken. Bring a blanket or chair and snacks. Free. Rain location is the H.O. Weeks Center. (803) 642-7631.

HOMEWORK STUDY SKILLS FOR STUDENTS Saturdays from 9 a.m.-noon at Shiloh Comprehensive Community Center. Computers are available. Call 7380089 for info.

STORYTIME AND CR AFTS every Tuesday and Thursday, 11 a.m., at Zany Brainy. Open to kids 2-4 years old; parental supervision is required for the duration of the event. Call 736-6229 for details.

AFTER-SCHOOL PROGR AM at the Smith-Hazel Recreation Center in Aiken through May, 2-6 p.m.

Open to kids ages 5-13. Call (803) 642-7635.

CHILDREN’S LEARNING CENTER at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black History open Monday-Friday, 4:30-6:30 p.m., through June. For information, call 724-3576.

ACADEMIC HELP AND TUTORING available Saturdays, 2:30-4:30 p.m. at the Wallace Branch Library. Call 722-6275 to make arrangements.

GIRLS INCORPOR ATED AFTER-SCHOOL PROGR AM runs through the end of the 2002-2003 school year. A variety of programs will be of fered. Services include van pick-up at select schools, evening drop-of f, homework room and hot evening meal. Open to girls in kindergar ten through high school. Af ter-school program of fered 2:30-6 p.m. Mon.-Fri. For more information, call 733-2512.

57

Frustrated Contractor is "Giving Away" $2150 Furnaces for $499 with Off-Season Central Air Conditioners…

(This is great financial news if your furnace is over 8 years old) Yes, it’s absolutely true. You can actually replace your old (and probably very inefficient) furnace and air conditioner as a package for at least $1,600 less than you would have to pay at any other time. Let me explain. Every year, the months of January, February and March can "Kill" my business. I end up losing a ton of money during these "Killer" months and it can take me the remaining nine months to make up for them. And I’m looking for the same thing to happen this year.

My Problem Is Your Opportunity I’ve decided to give up trying to make a profit during the "killer" months. If I can only minimize my losses during January, February and March, I will come out ahead in the other nine months. Here’s how this (admittedly daring) offer came about. Every year, the big manufacturers of air conditioners have to guess how many to build to meet the demand. Of course, they’re never exactly right. So, they always have some inventory they must hold over until the next summer season. I went to one of these companies and contracted for the purchase of 18 premium air conditioners and furnaces in the four most popular sizes used in the Augusta area. Because of the quantity and time of year, I was able to buy them at drastically reduced, dirt cheap, out-of-season prices. They are brand new 2002 models. And they are NOT the seconds or "blems" or standard "builder" models.

They are factory-fresh, premium air conditioners and furnaces and have a full factory warranty.

Here’s How You Can Get A Furnace For Peanuts By putting this furnace and air conditioner package together (then "Jaw-Boning" the factory) and committing to a do-or-die purchase agreement of 18 systems, I was able to buy both the furnace and the air conditioner for less than anyone should have a right to pay! So, if you buy one of these normal 18 15 11 9 new, premium air conditioners (but only if one of the four sizes I have will fit your house, of course), I am

"giving" you the furnace and all I ask for is the $499 in labor it costs to have your furnace installed.

Here’s How Just call us at 722-5304 anytime. We will come out and measure your home (and determine the availability of the proper size). Don’t forget, I only have 18 15 11 9 matched systems in four sizes. When they are gone, this remarkable offer ends also. I will show you the real world price on the air conditioner that fits your home. Then, I will show you the substantial savings now. And it will include all labor and installation materials. Nothing is left out.

The Concept Is Simple Really By letting you win big now, I will win at the end of the year. I’m betting that if I make you an offer that is "irresistible" (at least it should be if your furnace or air conditioner is over 8 years old) and I barely mark it up above the price I paid, I will accomplish two things: 1. I will cover my rent, utilities, insurance and taxes in the "killer" months.

2. I can pay my professional staff of 14 technicians to work instead of paying them to sit at home or sweep floors.

M E T R O

Offer o t Extendedst April 1

M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

John Haynie, Owner like some companies do. Consider this. If you decide to make monthly investments instead of paying cash the entire amount of your payments might be more than offset by the savings on your utility bills. It’s like "having your cake and eating it too".

Why This Offer Can’t Last You must act before April 1st. Here are two reasons why.

1. I can only have 6 of each of the three sizes.

When all of the air conditioners are sold and all the furnaces are "given" away in a particular size, that’s it. There are no more at this price.

11 9 2. If I have any of the 15 systems left on April 1st (although I doubt I will), this offer still ends. Here’s why. The only reason I am making this virtually no-profit (for me) offer is because of the "killer months.

Give us a call now at 722-5304, and we will set an appointment for your no-obligation survey.

“FIXED RIGHT OR IT'S FREE™”

If I can accomplish these two objectives, I will minimize my losses and the rest of the year, I can be a winner.

No Obligation Even after I completely explain the installation, there is absolutely no obligation. If you decide you don’t want to take advantage of the spectacular savings… that’s okay. I want you to think well of SIG COX even if you don’t buy.

You Can Buy With NO Cash You don’t even have to pay me right away. I have set up a terrific bank rate financing plan. I even decided not to mark up the interest rate

S P I R I T

Sig Cox, Inc. AIR CONDITIONING and HEATING 1431 Greene Street Augusta, Georgia 30901

722-5304 © 2001 AT500

Meetings

58 YOUTH LEADERSHIP DEVELOPMENT SKILLS PROGR AM M E T R O

for teens ages 12-19 held the third Saturday of the month at the Lucy Craf t Laney Museum of Black Histor y. Call 724-3576.

AUGUSTA AREA SURVIVORS OF SUICIDE meets at 3 p.m.

March 23 at Advent Lutheran Church, 3232 Washington Rd. For more information, call 863-6785.

WEEKLY STORY SESSIONS at all branch libraries. Visit www.ecgrl.public.lib.ga.us for more information.

PRIDE AND PROGRESS OF AUGUSTA-RICHMOND COUNTY meets March 25, 7 p.m., at University Medical Center South.

For more information, call 798-3890.

S P I FIRST SATURDAY STORYTELLING at the Lucy Craf t Laney R Museum. In addition, there is a tour of the museum. Held 10 I a.m. to noon the first Saturday of the month. Call 724-3576.

T M A R

SAVANNAH RIVER SITE CITIZENS’ ADVISORY BOARD is open to the public and meets March 24-25 at the Sheraton Augusta Hotel. For more information, contact Jim Moore, 1800-249-8155.

Seniors

THE CANOE AND KAYAK CLUB OF AUGUSTA welcomes those of all ages and skill levels and meets the four th Tuesday of every month at 7 p.m. in the Warren Road Community Center. The club is also hosting Paddle Daze at Lake Olmstead from noon to 4 p.m. March 30. For event details, call 7388500. For more information on club membership, visit www.ckca.homestead.com, e-mail paddling@juno.com, or call 860-5432.

2 0 EASTER SPRING FLING FASHION SHOW AND DESSERT

TASTING is sponsored by the Augusta Senior Friends and

2 will be held at Savannah Rapids Pavilion beginning at 2 p.m.

0 0 April 3. Enter tainment and door prizes will also be featured.

3 Tickets are $5 and are available at the Senior Friends office,

1305 Interstate Parkway. For info, call 651-6716.

INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY CELEBRATION at the Senior Citizens Council of Augusta and the CSRA March 21, 10-11:30 a.m. For information, call 826-4480.

COMPUTER CLASSES FOR SENIOR CITIZENS Tuesdays and Thursdays, 11 a.m.-1 p.m. at Shiloh Comprehensive Community Center. For more information, call 738-0089.

AARP TAX ASSISTANCE is available at the Gibbs Library Tuesdays, 10 a.m.-2 p.m., through April 8. Free; registration is not required. Please bring a copy of your previous year’s ta x return. Call 863-1946 for more information. The Ma xwell Branch Library also of fers this service Tuesdays and Fridays, 10 a.m.-noon through April 15. Free; persons over 50 have priority. In-person registration required. Call 793-2020. AARP Ta x Aide is also available at the Senior Citizens Council of Greater Augusta and the CSRA Mondays, noon to 4 p.m. and Fridays, 9 a.m.-1 p.m. Free; call 8264480 for information.

AIKEN PARKS AND RECREATION offers a multitude of programs for senior adults, including bridge clubs, fitness classes, canasta clubs, line dancing, racquetball, ar ts and craf ts, tai chi, tennis and excursions. For more information, call (803) 642-7631.

JUD C. HICKEY CENTER FOR ALZHEIMER’S CARE provides families and caregivers of those with Alzheimer’s disease and dementia a break during the day. Activities and care available at the adult day center, and homecare is available as well. For information, call 738-5039.

THE ACADEMY FOR LIFELONG LEARNING offers lectures, courses, field trips, discussion groups and community information seminars on a variety of topics to mature adults. For more information, contact the USC-Aiken Office of Continuing Education at (803) 641-3288.

PEOPLE WITH ARTHRITIS CAN EXERCISE (PACE) meets at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital Tuesdays and Thursdays from 1-2 p.m. Call 823-5294.

THE SENIOR CITIZENS COUNCIL OF GREATER AUGUSTA AND THE CSRA offers a variety of classes, including aerobics, quilting, tai chi, Spanish, painting, line dancing, bowling, bridge, computers, yoga and pinochle. For dates and times, phone 826-4480.

ARTHRITIS AQUATICS offered Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays at Walton Rehabilitation Hospital. Classes meet 99:45 a.m., 10-10:45 a.m. or 12:15-1 p.m. $37.50/month. To register, call 733-5959.

SENIORNET provides adults age 50 and over education for and access to computer technology. Many different courses are offered. Contact the USC-Aiken Continuing Education Office at (803) 641-3563.

Sports AIKEN-AUGUSTA SWIM LEAGUE is hosting swim clinics March 31-April 3. Clinic at USC-Aiken held 4-5 p.m.; clinic at ASU held 6-7 p.m. Cost is $40. To register, contact Ken Heis, (803) 613-0202 or visit www.swimasl.org.

The U.S. Army Band gives a free concert March 23 at the Bell Auditorium.

Development and Alumni Relations at 737-1759.

TRIPLE CROWN GOLF CLASSIC March 31, 12:30 p.m., at Woodside Plantation Golf Club in Aiken.

Proceeds benefit Helping Hands of Aiken, TriDevelopment Center and the American Red Cross.

Registration must be completed by March 26. (803) 641-4152.

YOUTH BASEBALL REGISTR ATION at the Family Y’s Wheeler Branch March 24-April 5. Games begin in May, and baseball programs are open to boys and girls 4-11 years old. Fees vary by program. For more information, call 738-6678.

AIKEN TRIPLE CROWN events run through March 29.

March 22 Aiken Steeplechase post time is 1 p.m.; tickets are $10 in advance and $15 at the gate.

Children 6 and under free. Contact the Steeplechase Association for more information at (803) 648-9641.

March 29 Aiken Harness Race post time is 1 p.m.

Advance tickets are $8 adult, $5 children 6-11 years; tickets at the gate are $10 adult, $6 children 6-11.

Children under 6 free. For information, contact the Aiken Chamber of Commerce, (803) 641-1111.

INTRODUCTORY AND DROP-IN CLIMBING Fridays, 5:30-6:30 p.m., at the Virginia Acres Park Climbing Wall in Aiken. Cost is $5 per session. Call (803) 6427631 for information.

ADULT SPRING SOFTBALL in Aiken is open to men and women. Fees and rosters are due March 25 and league play begins in April. For more information, contact Jason Burke at (803) 643-4664.

THE AUGUSTA RUGBY CLUB is always looking for new members. Teams available for women and men; no experience necessary. Practice is Tuesday and Thursday nights, 79 p.m. at Richmond Academy. For more information, call Don Zuehlke, 495-2043, or e-mail augustar fc@yahoo.com.

You may also visit www.augustarugby.org.

TEN STAR ALL-STAR BASKETBALL CAMP is accepting applications for its summer programs through April. Boys and girls ages 10-19 are eligible. Call (704) 373-0873 for info.

UPCOMING AUGUSTA LYNX HOME GAMES: March 21-22, 25, 28 and 30. For tickets, call the Lynx ticket office at 724-4423.

TICKETS NOW ON SALE for the Augusta GreenJackets 2003 season. Home games at Lake Olmstead Stadium. Tickets available at www.tixonline.com or by phone at (803) 2784TIX. There is also a TIX outlet inside Harmon Optical in Southgate Plaza.

BEGINNER MONTHLY SPARRING for youth and adults March 20, 5:30-7 p.m., at the Augusta Boxing Club. Open to the public at no charge Call 733-7533 or visit www.augustaboxing.org for details.

AUGUSTA/AIKEN COUNTY SPRING REGATTA will be held March 22. For more information, contact the Augusta Rowing Club at 821-2875.

Volunteer

AUGUSTA STATE UNIVERSITY ALUMNI AND FRIENDS LAUDERDALE CHAMPIONSHIP March 28 at Forest Hills Golf Club. Casual dinner and silent auction to be held March 27. Registration deadline is March 25. For information, contact the ASU Of fice of

ADULT VOLUNTEER INFORMATION SESSION for those interested in working with the Girl Scouts. The Girl Scouts, Central Savannah River Council is looking for volunteers to help with events, administration, leadership and more. Find out about these oppor tunities at a March 26 information session, 6:30-

7:30 p.m. at the Nor th Augusta Community Center. Call 7740505 or 1-800-997-2472 for information.

THE GARDEN CITY MUSIC FESTIVAL, March 22 at Augusta Common, is in need of volunteers to sell t-shir ts and beverages throughout the day. Three-hour shifts available 11 a.m.-2 p.m., 2-5 p.m., 5-8 p.m. and 8-11 p.m. Volunteers get to enjoy the day for free. For information, contact Brenda Durant at the Greater Augusta Ar ts Council, 826-4702.

RELAY FOR LIFE TEAM CAPTAIN’S MEETING March 20, 6 p.m., at The Clubhouse on Washington Rd. Captains of teams par ticipating in the American Cancer Society’s Relay for Life event May 16-17 are invited to attend and register their team.

For info, call the American Cancer Society at 731-9900.

FORT DISCOVERY STUDENT VOLUNTEER PROGRAM is looking for volunteers, ages 15 and up, to commit 30 hours over the summer. For more information on this oppor tunity, contact Millie Schumacher, 821-0609.

COLUMBIA COUNTY’S GREAT AMERICAN CLEAN-UP March 29. Lit ter removal takes place from 9 a.m.-1 p.m. Meet at the Evans Government Complex. For information, call 261-4390.

AMERICAN CANCER SOCIETY’S “REACH TO RECOVERY” TRAINING for outreach program to women with breast cancer. Volunteers are carefully selected and trained, and are breast cancer survivors who have fully adjusted to surgery.

Volunteers will be cer tified March 22 at the Doctors Hospital Senior Friends Building. Breast cancer survivors interested in becoming Reach to Recovery volunteers may call 731-9900 for info.

THE KITTY ORTIZ DE LEON FOUNDATION needs volunteers to help promote organ donor awareness. For more information, please contact Cassandra Reed at 481-0105 or kodfoundation@aol.com.

GOLDEN HARVEST FOOD BANK needs volunteers during the day, Monday-Friday, to help sor t donated products and assist in their agency shopping area. Help is needed yearround. If you are able to lif t 25 pounds and would like to help fight hunger in the Augusta area, contact Laurie Roper at 736-1199, ex t. 208.

THOROUGHBRED RACING HALL OF FAME DOCENTS NEEDED: Duties include opening and closing the Hall of Fame, greeting visitors and providing information about museum exhibits. Call Lisa Hall, (803) 642-7650 for information.

OLDER AMERICANS ACT SENIOR NUTRITION PROGRAM is looking for volunteers to serve meals to needy older residents.

To volunteer, contact the Senior Citizens Council at 826-4480.

For those in need of home-delivered meals, call 210-2018 or toll free at 1-888-922-4464.

AUGUSTA-RICHMOND COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL: New volunteer orientation is scheduled the first Saturday of each month at 1 p.m. at the shelter, 4164 Mack Lane. Schedule subject to change; call 790-6836 to verify dates and times.

THE CSRA HUMANE SOCIETY is looking for animal lovers willing to donate a lit tle of their time. Volunteers are needed every Saturday at the Pet Center located behind GreenJackets Stadium on Milledge Road. Call 261-PETS for more info.

SHEPEARD COMMUNITY BLOOD CENTER is seeking donors to prevent a blood supply shor tage. To donate call 737-4551, 854-1880 or (803) 643-7996.

THE GEM AND MINERAL SOCIETY meets the third Friday of every month at the Georgia Military College Building on Davis Rd. at 7:30 p.m. The group also sponsors field trips the four th Saturday of each month. Interested par ties should contact Jean Parker, 650-2956, or Connie Barrow, 547-0178, for more info.

PARENTS WITHOUT PARTNERS to star t a CSRA chapter.

Organizational meeting will be held March 22, 10 a.m.-11:30 a.m. in Room C101 of the Welcome Center at Warren Baptist Church. All single parents who are separated, divorced, widowed or never married are invited to attend, and custody of children is not a membership requirement. For more information, contact Larissa Illyn at (803) 819-0150.

RICHMOND ACADEMY CLASS OF 1968 is looking for members interested in planning or attending the 35th reunion celebration, planned for later this year. If you graduated from ARC in 1968, please e-mail contact information to Academy1968@aol.com or call Hap Harris, 724-2452.

NEW ADULT WOMEN’S BOOK CLUB based on the NBC “Today” show book club is forming, and organizers are looking for interested par ties. Beginning in April, the club is planning on holding monthly meetings at Borders on a Tuesday evening. Those interested in joining are advised to page Marian at 785-0006 for details.

PRISMS GROUP for singles is star ting up at Marvin Methodist Church. Prisms is not a dating service, but will provide a casual, comfor table atmosphere for singles to get together, as well as outings and meetings. For more information, call the Marvin Methodist Church office at 863-0510.

Weekly

CHRIST-BASED RECOVERY MEETING every Tuesday, 6:30 p.m., at the Love & Light Healing Center. Please use the back entrance. For information, contact Kenny Stacy, 373-5585.

FREE ‘N’ ONE SUPPORT GROUP for those bat tling addiction to drugs and alcohol. Approach is a spiritual one. Held every Thursday night. For information, contact Sarah Barnes, 772-7325.

TOUGH LOVE SUPPORT GROUP Monday nights, 6:30-7:30 p.m. at the South Augusta Resource Center. Learn how to understand addiction and how to exercise tough love with those you care about. Call Sarah Barnes, 772-7325, for info.

GEORGIA-CAROLINA TOASTMASTERS meets Wednesdays at noon at the Clubhouse, 2567 Washington Rd. $8 for lunch; visitors welcome. 860-9854.

SEXAHOLICS ANONYMOUS, a 12-step program of recovery from addiction to obsessive/compulsive sexual thoughts and behaviors, meets Wednesdays at 8 p.m. and Saturdays at 7 p.m. at Augusta Counselling Services. Call 339-1204 and leave first name and phone number; a confidential reply is assured.

AUGUSTA TOASTMASTERS CLUB #326 meets Thursdays at 7:30 p.m. at Advent Lutheran Church. Call 868-8431.

BUSINESS NETWORK INTERNATIONAL Augusta Chapter meets every Thursday morning from 7 to 8:30 a.m. at the Cour tyards by Mariott. The group is a business networking group designed to give and receive referrals. All professionals welcome. For more information or to join, call Barbara Crenshaw, 868-3772.

RIVERWALK TOASTMASTERS meets Mondays, 7 p.m. in Classroom 3 at University Hospital. Call Gale Kan, 855-7071.

GUIDELINES: Public Service announcements are listed in this section without charge at the discretion of the editor.

Announcements must be received by Monday at noon and will be included as space permits. Send to Events, The Metropolitan Spirit, P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914 or fax (706) 733-6663. You may also e-mail listings to rhonda_jones@metspirit.com or lisa_jordan@metspirit.com.

Listings cannot be taken over the phone.

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Cinema

“View From the Top”

M E T R O S P I R I T

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Movie Listings

Agent Cody Banks (PG) — is about teens recruited by the CIA — Osama, are you watching?

Compact hero Cody, 15, gets to derail the scary plan for global domination of another crazy villain (Ian McShane). It blithely exploits such talents as Cynthia Stevenson, Mar tin Donovan and Keith David (tops as the CIA chief). This hyper baby Bond has gizmos, chases, modestly lavish sets, cheap explosions, a sleek va-voom played by Angie Harmon and a girlish wow played by Hilary Duf f, who's like a Culkin version of Bardot. Running time: 1 hr., 50 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Biker Boyz (PG-13) — Described as a “contemporar y Western on wheels,” “Biker Boyz” delves into the underground world of motorcycle racing.

Undefeated champ Smoke dominates California’s racing scene, but his position is threatened by a young racer named Kid. Kid’s out to win Smoke’s helmet — and his fame. Cast: Laurence Fishburne, Derek Luke, Orlando Jones, Djimon Hounsole, Lisa Bonet, Kid Rock.

Boat Trip (R) — Jerr y (Cuba Gooding) is struggling to get over the hear tbreak of losing his ex-girlfriend. Best pal Nick has the bright idea of taking Jerr y on a singles cruise to get Jerr y’s mind of f the woman who just lef t him. Once the men board the boat and discover that there are no women to be found, they discover that the cruise is actually a gay singles cruise. The only woman on the ship, a dance instructor, thinks Jerr y is gay — an assumption which only ser ves to fur ther complicate things as Jerr y finds that he is falling in love with her. Cast: Cuba Gooding, Horatio Sanz, Will Ferrell, Vivica A. Fox. Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins.

Bringing Down the House (PG-13) —

Queen Latifah smoothly pockets "Bringing Down the House" as Charlene, a good-hear ted fugitive from the law, turning to a starchy, divorced ta x at torney for refuge and suppor t. Steve Mar tin is the lawyer, Peter. The core idea of this ver y simple comedy is pure buzz of contrast: Latifah is abundantly, explosively black, while Mar tin may be the whitest man

Miramax

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ever to star in movies. Latifah rides out the nonsense in her queenly, Pearl Bailey st yle. It's a cookie-cut comedy. The movie delivers its ver y manufactured goods, but it lacks the guts to be a meaningful comedy. Cast: Steve Mar tin, Queen Latifah, Eugene Levy, Joan Plowright, Jean Smar t, Bet t y White. Running time: 1 hr., 45 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ Catch Me If You Can (PG-13) — From the breezy opening credits done in '60s hip style, Steven Spielberg's charmed enter tainment flies along with confidence. Leonardo DiCaprio is entirely engaging as Frank Abagnale Jr., con ar tist and ace kiter of checks, pursued with increasingly caring fixation by Tom Hanks as a square FBI man. Christopher Walker is the smooth-talking flop dad whom Frank yearns to impress. Running time: 2 hrs., 15 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ Chicago (PG-13) —- It's been 23 years since Richard Gere stripped on Broadway for "Bent." Now he gets to pull of f his clothes as slick shyster Billy Flynn. Mostly in wonder ful suits, his hair shining like creased silver, Gere is having the best time of his movie life, singing and tapdancing and lording over women with rakish snaz. He's a lioness-tamer; the main cats are Velma Kelly (Catherine Zeta-Jones), a cabaret sex bazooka and killer on Death Row and newcomer Roxie Har t (Renee Zellweger), a Bet t y Boop who killed her lover. For cash and headlines, Flynn will help guilt y women beat the law. "Chicago" is zip for depth, but it has all the sex y sur face it needs to be ex travagantly alive. It tops of f at the Chicago Theater, and the old show palace looks delighted. Cast: Renee Zellweger, Catherine ZetaJones, Richard Gere, John C. Reilly, Queen Latifah, Christine Baranski, Taye Diggs. Running time: 1 hr., 53 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★★ Cradle 2 the Grave (R) — DMX stars as thief Tony Fait, who pulls of f a heist involving rare black diamonds. On Fait’s trail is Su (Jet Li), a Taiwanese government agent who has been tracking the path of the diamonds throughout the world. Su’s former par tner Ling, lured by the diamonds and looking to pro-

cure them for himself, kidnaps Fait’s young daughter in an at tempt to exchange her for the diamonds. Fait realizes his only chance to get his daughter back is to team up with Su. Cast: Jet Li, DMX, Anthony Anderson, Gabrielle Union, Mark Dacascos.

Daredevil (PG-13) — Ben Af fleck as Mat t Murdock is another lonely " tormented" orphan whose only therapy is a revenge quest that pretends to be a moral, cit y-saving crusade. His boxing father (David Keith) came to a brutal end, not long af ter the sensitive boy was blinded by a chemical spill. Now his other senses are "heightened," which somehow gives Daredevil immense strength, the talent to leap great distances. Colin Farrell plays enemy Bullseye, who loves hurling sharp objects at people's throats. The hero's fem interest is Elek tra (Jennifer Garner). There is immense Michael Clarke Duncan as bad guy Kingpin. We want to believe that corporate Hollywood can evolve beyond this form of serial constipation, so full of action, but with nothing truly human moving.

Cast: Ben Af fleck, Jennifer Garner, Colin Farrell, David Keith, Michael Clarke Duncan. Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins. (Elliot t) ★ Dark Blue (R) — Perr y (Kur t Russell) is a corrupt cop. Keough (Scot t Speedman) is the rookie par tner. Perr y is a racist boozer prone to habitual gun use. Keough is dazzled by his bazooka verbiage and cock y authorit y, and by his groove with the t wisted white men who treat the LAPD as a personal fiefdom.

As a jur y deliberates the Rodney King beating case and the cit y faces breakdown, the small, nast y games continue. Brendan Gleeson is the top racist, a bullhorn who boasts, "I am a per former of unpleasant tasks." The most unpleasant involves the murder of four people in a robber y, authorized by Gleeson, with Perr y ordered to provide cover-up. Few films have shown such contempt for a cit y or a police force.

Gleeson's vile cynicism is summed up by his clima x eruption, "(Bleep) L.A.!" At least, unlike Perr y, he gets right to the point. Cast: Kur t Russell, Scot t Speedman, Ving Rhames, Lolita Davidovich, Brendan Gleeson, Michael Michele. Running time: 1 hr., 56

mins. (Elliot t) ★★

Deliver Us From Eva (R) — Eva, described

as the “sister-in-law from hell” by the men in her life, is one big nagging pain in the — well, you get the idea. The guys, desperate to stop her nagging and shut her up for good, hope that the right man will do the trick. They pay a smooth studmuf fin, played by LL Cool J, to seduce Eva. The resul ts of the ex periment come as a surprise to ever yone.

Cast: Gabrielle Union, LL Cool J, Essence Atkins, Dar tanyan Edmonds, Meagan Good.

Die Another Day (PG-13) — Pierce Brosnan moves with energy and can fake conviction. His chest hair is superb, his voice remains Bondaceous. But he looks peaked, and we imagine he found time to remember when acting meant, well, acting. Not just pulverizing glass, plunging through ice, brandishing absurd weapons and making limp jokes. True to its Cold War roots, the series reaches for one more rotten Commie enemy. So bring on dear old Nor th Korea. A Pyongyang lunatic has found the resources, via diamonds, to create a satellite sun called Icarus, to burn or blind the dumb Yanks, the snot t y Brits and the greedy South Korean stooges. He captures Bond, tor tures him, then zips of f to Cuba, where he is DNAmorphed into a sneer y Brit named Graves (Toby Stephens). We recall Conner y, and old plots that, however abundantly silly, were adventurous larks and not just plastic shelves for hardware display. Cast: Pierce Brosnan, Halle Berr y, Toby Stephens, Rosamund Pike, John Cleese, Judi Dench, Rick Yune.

Running time: 2 hrs. (Elliot t) ★★ Dreamcatcher (R) — Four men, friends since childhood, still meet once ever y year to hunt, despite the vastly dif ferent lives they lead. They have one eerie thing in common, though; their psychic abilities, given to them by an outcast they befriended in their grade-school days. This trip, however, turns out to be dif ferent. First, one of the friends is lost in an unexpected accident. Then a violent snowstorm threatens to pen in the remaining pals. The third misfor tune,

“The Hunted”

Artisan Entertainment

“Boat Trip”

RATINGS

★★★★ — Excellent.

★★★— Worthy.

Paramount Pictures

M A R

★★ — Mixed.

★ — Poor.

0— Not worthy.

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (PG) — Harr y (Daniel Radclif fe) faces destiny with

a clear eye and spor t y will, not the least neurotic despite having been orphaned into a family of idiotic prigs who treat him abominably. He again escapes to Hogwar ts, to his pals (Ruper t Grint as wobble-faced Ron, Emma Watson as book worm Hermione) and the snippish regard of Prof. Snape (Alan Rickman) and Prof. McGonegall (Maggie Smith), and the wonder ful giant Hagrid (Robbie Coltrane) and Headmaster Dumbledore (Richard Harris, now dead). Jason Isaacs should be given more time as Lucius, the evil, whitemaned father of snob Draco Malfoy. There is a sense of a grand machine greased, sometimes grinding. The "chamber of secrets" is less an exciting myster y at the center than a device to car t the bulk y saga forward. Cast: Daniel Radclif fe, Ruper t Grint, Emma Watson, Kenneth Branagh, Richard Harris, Alan Rickman, Maggie Smith, Robbie Coltrane. Running time: 2 hrs., 41 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★

How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days (PG-13) — should be retitled "How to Lose a Movie in 10

Minutes." The spirited opening credits are a clever visual and musical introduction to Andie Anderson (Kate Hudson) as she dashes and fumbles though research for "how-to" ar ticles published in a glit zy women's magazine. But all promise evaporates when the lame dialogue begins. Andie is destined to meet Mat thew McConaughey's womanizing adver tising executive, Ben Barr y, whose major goal is snagging the world's biggest diamond account. These t wo upand-coming New York hot ties bump along through the contrived plot, which involves Andie's "how to lose a guy" assignment and Ben's bet with competing co-workers that he can make a woman fall in love with him — all in the same 10-day deadline. The teasers for "10 Days" tout: "One of them is lying. So is the other." Ah, yes, the per fect date movie. Cast: Kate Hudson, Mat thew McConaughey, Adam Goldberg, Bebe Neuwir th. Running time: 1 hr., 50 mins. (Wood) ★1/2 The Hunted (R) — From "The Hunted," you might learn how to escape from a police dragnet in Por tland, Ore., swim down a river, dry out, eat nothing, forge a deadly knife from scrap steel using a brush fire you've improvised, and then quickly enter the forest for a showdown with Tommy Lee Jones. But it helps greatly if you are Aaron Hallam (Benicio Del Toro), former military killer. He was trained in all the deadly ar ts by L.T. Bonham (Jones). "The Hunted" is "First Blood" shoved into grateful memories of "The Fugitive," with Del Toro less a Rambo than a psycho, and Jones pursuing a guilty rather than innocent man. "The Hunted" star ts to seem like something eaten by angry bears. Cast: Tommy Lee Jones, Benicio Del Toro, Connie Nielsen, Jenna Boyd. Running time: 1 hr., 34 mins. (Elliot t) ★★ The Jungle Book 2 (G) — Mowgli and friends return in this animated sequel to the Disney classic.

Mowgli has adjusted to life in the village with all the other humans, but he still misses his animal friends, especially Baloo. When Mowgli sneaks away to the jungle to visit his old pals, it’s a race to see who can find him first: the friends he’s looking to visit or maneating tiger Shere Khan. Cast: John Goodman, Haley Joel Osment, Tony Jay. The Life of David Gale (R) — Kevin Spacey stars as David Gale, a family man and popular professor who is convicted of murdering a fellow activist.

Just days before he is scheduled to be executed, Gale agrees to an exclusive inter view with rabid journalist Bitsey Bloom, who soon discovers that there is more to Gale’s stor y than meets the eye — and that his life

61

“Piglet’s Big Movie”

M E T R O S P I R I T

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M A R

Walt Disney Pictures

and perhaps the most terrifying, involves a lost hunter who shows up at their cabin, infected with a contagious alien parasite. Cast: Jason Lee, Morgan Freeman, Thomas Jane, Damien Lewis, Timothy Olyphant, Tom Sizemore, Donnie Wahlberg.

Drumline (PG-13) — A young street drummer from Harlem wins a scholarship to at tend a Southern universit y and decides to make the trek af ter being convinced by the universit y’s band director, even though he knows he’ll have a hard time fit ting in.

Gradually, his drumming skills help the other students warm up to him. Cast: Nick Cannon, Orlando Jones, Zoe Saldana, Jason Weaver.

Final Destination 2 (R) — As in the first movie, a group of teen-agers manages to cheat death.

But death, unsatisfied with the teens’ getaway, pursues in a myriad of disturbing ways. Kimberly, driving a group of friends to Florida, has a premonition that helps them avoid being caught in a fatal freeway pileup. Death has other plans. Cast: Ali Lar ter, A.J. Cook, Michael Landes, T.C. Carson, Jonathan Cherr y, James Kirk, Tony Todd.

Friday After Next (R) — This is the third film in the "Friday" series and features the same people, places and pals highlighted in the first t wo. "Friday Af ter Nex t" takes place around Christmas, as Craig and Day-Day are working as securit y guards af ter a "ghet to Santa" who’s been stealing presents. Cast: Ice Cube, Mike Epps, Don "D.C." Curr y.

is in her hands. Cast: Kevin Spacey, Kate Winslet, Laura Linney.

Maid in Manhattan (PG-13) — The air y fantasy puts Jennifer Lopez into a cute maid's uniform at a swank New York hotel. She's Marisa, and when she tries on the ver y expensive, if rather Bel Air trophy wife, out fit of a snobbish guest, this at tracts the "playboy" eye of senatorial hopeful Chris Marshall (Ralph Fiennes). Chris' manager (Stanley Tucci) is in control-freak agony that the Republican politician might fall in love with someone not toit y and rich. The film is most marked by the flagrant waste of talent. As the sitcom yucks racked up their lit tle nif ties, perked along by music, I had a weird, tiny pinch of nostalgia for "Jackass: The Movie." Cast: Jennifer Lopez, Ralph Fiennes, Bob Hoskins, Natasha Richardson, Stanley Tucci, Tyler Garcia Posey. Running time: 1 hr., 35 mins. (Elliot t) ★1/2 Old School (R) — Three buddies, men in their 20s, wish to recapture the good ol’ days: college, when raging keggers and hot girls were plentiful.

They get their chance when one of them decides it’s a good idea to star t their own of f-campus frat house. Cast: Luke Wilson, Will Ferrell, Vince Vaughn, Elisha Cuthber t.

The Pianist (R) — The stor y of how gif ted pianist Wladyslaw Szpilman (played by delicately featured, demurely expressive Adrien Brody) sur vived the Nazi rape of Poland and the Holocaust is blended without hysteria, indeed with sobering control, into the personal gravit y of director Roman Polanski's childhood during the war hell. It's a wonder ful film, with surges of honest feeling that can knock you nearly flat, and Chopin underscores the emotions. 2 hrs., 28 mins.(Elliot t) ★★★★ Piglet’s Big Movie (G) — Piglet gets to be the center of at tention in the latest animated movie based on the Winnie-the-Pooh gang. When the rest of the gang begins a honey har vest and won’t let Piglet help because of his small size, Piglet disappears. To find him, the gang uses his scrapbook as a map, and, along the way, discovers that even a small pig can be a big hero. Cast: John Fiedler, Jim Cummings, Peter Cullen.

The Recruit (PG-13) — Al Pacino, as CIA recruiter Walter Burke, takes young MIT grad James Clay ton (Colin Farrell) "through the looking glass," for spy training and tough tests at The Farm, the CIA school outside Washington. His insider hook on Clay ton is that he might have the secret the younger man needs to know, about the dead father whom he suspects died on a CIA mission in 1990. The story tangles boyish Clay ton with the recruit Layla (Bridget Moynahan), another go-for-it brain with a similar taste for danger. The story twists and snaps through the set tings with tricky confidence, and the modern device of using computers fits this plot snugly. "The Recruit" manages the commercially savvy trick of being both insolent and patriotic about the CIA. It will probably recruit some fans of this movie. Cast: Al Pacino, Colin Farrell, Gabriel Macht, Bridget Moynahan. Running time: 1 hr., 45 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ The Ring (PG-13) — begins with the telling of an urban-legend-like tale that, for a while, seems likely to consign this movie to the slasher/horror bin: A weird videotape is circulating. As soon as you're through watching it, the telephone rings. A voice on the phone informs you that you have seven days to live. Seven days later, you die. The film boasts firstrate per formances, a gorgeous look, an engaging plot and a jangly, thrumming sense of dread. The ef fectiveness of such a movie depends entirely on the beholder. Save for a long, uneasy feeling of foreboding and one solid jolt, I didn't find it all that scar y. Two young women exiting the theater in front of me, however, declared that the thing had terrified them, and I'm willing to take their word for it. Cast: Naomi Wat ts, Mar tin Henderson, David Dor fman, Brian Cox.

2 0

patagonia

®

Barbour

®

Running time: 1 hr., 55 mins. (Salm) ★★1/2 Shanghai Knights (PG-13) — This is a sequel to 2000's silly hit "Shanghai Noon." The sequel feels longer and has some sag. Jackie Chan is a former imperial guardsman from 19th-centur y Peking, but gone to the Old (then young) West as Chon Wang, a.k.a. John Wayne. He's now a sherif f, and Owen Wilson as scampy ladies' man Roy O'Bannon has decamped to Victorian London, where he is a stubblecheeked waiter, but still has a harem of loyal females.

The Chinese imperial seal with a huge diamond is falling into the sneak y hands of an imperial wannabe in exile, who is allied with a wannabe future king of England. The film ends with the usual Chan bonus, a spree of blooper shots. Cast: Jackie Chan, Owen Wilson, Fann Wong, Aaron Johnson, Gemma Jones.

Running time: 1 hr., 42 mins. (Elliot t) ★★1/2 Tears of the Sun (R) — Antoine Fuqua's film is about a Special Ops team of U.S. soldiers sent from an aircraf t carrier into civil-warring Nigeria to rescue an American ("by marriage") doctor and some missionaries who quickly decide to mar t yr themselves. The team leader, Waters (Bruce Willis), tricks the doctor (Monica Bellucci) onto a chopper out, leaving her Nigerian wards behind. But something moral clicks in Waters' hard head and he returns with the doctor to lead the innocents out by foot, hoping to make it to the border while being hunted by a wellequipped regiment of ruthless soldiers. With soldiers like Waters preparing for war in Iraq, on a mission they hope will be this morally credible, it is the stark fear and danger, and the stunned, desperate civilians, that make "Tears of the Sun" seem timely. Cast: Bruce Willis, Monica Bellucci, Cole Hauser, Bourke Floyd, Malick Bowens, Tom Skerrit t. Running time: 1 hr., 45 mins. (Elliot t) ★★★ Two Weeks Notice (PG-13) — Lucy Kelson (Sandra Bullock) is a smar t but stressed at torney whose client, millionaire George Wade (Hugh Grant), is deeply dependent on her. George won’t let her quit until she finds her own replacement – a young lawyer who has her eye on George. George, however, is looking elsewhere: at what just lef t. Cast: Sandra Bullock, Hugh Grant, Alicia Wit t.

View From the Top (PG-13) — Donna, a small-town girl from Nevada, sees the world’s most famous stewardess (played by Candice Bergen) on television and becomes inspired to follow the same career path instead of wasting away her life behind the counter of the local drugstore. She dreams of one day becoming a first-class international flight at tendant, but first she must deal with the pit falls of training, turbulence and unruly passengers on a regional airline. Cast: Gwyneth Paltrow, Christina Applegate, Kelly Preston, Mike Myers, Candice Bergen, Rob Lowe.

The Wild Thornberrys (PG) — Big-screen version of the animated Nickeloden series about a family who travels around the world to make nature documentaries. While in Africa, 12-year-old Eliza learns that she can speak with animals and, with their help, aims to stop a group of poachers. Cast: Lacey Chaber t, Tim Curr y, Ruper t Everet t, Flea, Lynn Redgrave, Marisa Tomei.

Willard (PG-13) — Willard Stiles, a 30-year-old man with antisocial tendencies and a ver y Norman Bates relationship with his mother, cannot bond with other humans. He befriends a pack of rats living in his basement; the rats, in turn, terrorize and exact revenge on those who have done Willard wrong.

Cast: Crispin Glover, R. Lee Ermey, Laura Elena Harring, Jackie Burroughs.

—Capsules compiled from movie reviews writ ten by David Elliot t, film critic for The San Diego Union-Tribune and other staf f writers.

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Cinema: Review

2002 Oscar Round-Up

A

hhh … Oscar time. For the film buff, the Academy Awards is almost always a bittersweet event, as commercialism collides with artistic worth and the mystery that is Hollywood emerges.

So what did Oscar dredge up this year?

Best Picture What should win: “Gangs of New York” or “The Hours” What will win: “Chicago” Well, in the Best Picture category, the frontrunners are “Chicago” and “Gangs of New York.” The musical is the favorite here, with enough buzz behind it to deafen Harvey Weinstein. I would be most unhappy if “Chicago” won. The film’s a fine musical … but what’s that really saying? If “Chicago” does manage to bring home a statuette and, in the process, revive the movie musical, we’ll have Mr. Weinstein to blame, not thank. (The loudmouthed head of Miramax has been touting himself as the re-inventor of the movie wheel on this front.) So what about “Gangs”? This is the movie with the best shot to beat “Chicago” and the one I’m pulling for. An ambitious, sweeping effort from the iconoclastic cinema genius, Martin Scorsese, “Gangs” deserves to win. A flawed, overblown film, it is, nonetheless, brilliant in parts. The other exciting film in this category is “The Hours.” This one also makes my top 10 for the year. To put it bluntly, Stephen Daldry’s rich, layered rendering of Michael Cunningham’s dense novel is superb. With three stunning performances and an excellent score from Phillip Glass,

By Rachel Deahl

“The Hours” would be a fine winner in this category, but it doesn’t look likely to bring home the gold.

Best Actor Who should win: Jack Nicholson or Daniel Day-Lewis Who will win: Daniel Day-Lewis On to the actors … I usually find that there are more great performances every year than great movies, and 2002 was no exception. Nonetheless, the competition is really only between Jack Nicholson and Daniel Day-Lewis. Nicholson gave the most understated and nuanced performance of his career as the title character in “About Schmidt.” Irreverent, heartbreaking and hokey, Jack managed to rid himself of his characteristic flashiness for this role.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, Daniel Day-Lewis turned in an unforgettable, over-the-top performance as Bill the Butcher in “Gangs of New York.” I would be happy to see either of these guys walk away with Oscar gold and think DayLewis has the edge (since his film is nominated for Best Picture and Oscar often chooses flashier performances over the more understated ones).

Best Actress Who should win: Julianne Moore or Nicole Kidman Who will win: Renée Zellweger And the women … Well this was the year of Moore – Julianne, that is. One of the most celebrated and respected actresses working today (not to mention the one who consistently seems to land the meatiest “The Hours”

female roles), Ms. Moore turned in two exceptional performances this year. Up against Renée Zellweger, who’s riding the “Chicago” fire, Moore should win for her turn in “Far From Heaven.” Will she? Hard to say … It would be disappointing to see Zellweger walk off with a win here, but there’s always the possibility “Chicago” will sweep (as Oscar loves to give all the awards to one film). But I say if Moore can’t have it, the Oscar should go to Nicole Kidman, who was exceptional in “The Hours.”

Best Supporting Actress Who should win: Meryl Streep Who will win: Catherine Zeta-Jones The supporting players … Well, on the women’s side, there’s been some buzz about the possibility of Queen Latifah making waves here. To be fair, this is the category with the most possibility for an upset. These awards come early in the show and can often throw a monkeywrench into your picks. Catherine ZetaJones would be the safe bet here, but look for Queen Latifah or even Meryl Streep to creep in with a surprise win.

Best Supporting Actor Who should win: Chris Cooper Who will win: Christopher Walken For the men, the favorite is Christopher Walken, who won this honor at the BAFTA awards. I’d love to see Chris Cooper sneak a win here for his quirky turn as the toothless plant genius, John Laroche, in “Adaptation.”

If Walken doesn’t take home gold, look for Cooper in the upset or John C. Reilly to swoop in on the heels of a “Chicago” sweep.

“About Schmidt”

“Gangs of New York”

Best Director Who should win: Martin Scorsese Who will win: Martin Scorsese In the final category, Best Director, the idiocy of Oscar politics is revealed. My thinking is that Best Director and Best Picture should go hand in hand; after all, what is it saying when the best film of the year wasn’t made by the best director of the year? Since the creative worth of a film is often credited to the director, this award should be linked to Best Picture. Oscar doesn’t agree. This year the Academy has decided to snub New Zealand helmer Peter Jackson and instead nominate Spanish indie darling, Pedro Almodovar.

Apparently Jackson’s second installment of the “Lord of the Rings” series is good enough for gold, but he is not. Conversely, Almodovar deserves the nod here, but his picture, “Talk to Her,” doesn’t belong in either Best Picture or Best Foreign Film.

(Don’t even get me started on the way in which the Academy defines “foreign” films.) No matter. This Oscar is almost definitely going to Martin Scorsese. As the one nominated director who’s closest to a household name and as a celebrated filmmaker who’s never won, he’s the favorite.

If “Chicago” does win Best Picture, it’s still unlikely the Academy will honor director Rob Marshall. In the end, when it comes to talking movies, Scorsese is synonymous with important cinema, while Marshall is a moniker which will make most people think of that woman who directed “Big.” (That’s Penny Marshall, if you’re wondering.)

“Chicago”

Gag-worthy “Dreamcatcher” Is Immature

By Rachel Deahl Drama

Jim Belushi and

Cinema: Review

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f a horror movie should earn kudos for making you nauseated, then “Dreamcatcher” deserves a standing ovation. Traversing the icky, gooey territory of angry extraterrestrials and wedding it to the intricacies of human gastroenterology (yummy), the latest Stephen King vehicle delivers more material worthy of a gag reflex than a serious scare.

Set in the familiar King territory of rural Maine, “Dreamcatcher” follows a reunion among four friends that spirals into a gory alien invasion. Bound by strange psychic powers, an unsteady professor (Damian Lewis), a suicidal shrink (Thomas Jane), a hard-drinking car salesman (Timothy Oliphant) and a wisecracking loser (Jason Lee) get together for their annual hunting retreat in the deep north woods of New England. All haunted by their strange powers and troubled in their lives, the group reminisces about old times and the strange boy who changed them all. Given psychic abilities by a young retarded boy they took under their wing as children, the group now finds themselves at the center of a horrifying tragedy.

After discovering a sickly hunter wandering in the woods, the boys take him in only to find that he’s been infected with what the army has called “The Ripley.”

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$30 each the stomachs of the humans it inhabited in the movie “Alien,” the lethal parasites here take a more unfortunate escape route from their hosts: via the anal cavity.

Quarantined by an insane military chief (Morgan Freeman) who’s spent a lifetime fighting said aliens, the boys slowly fall prey to the chief baddie known as “Mr. Grey.” Eager to simply wipe out the hundreds of civilians who’ve been infected by the parasite, Freeman’s bushy-eyebrowed, white-haired colonel is determined to leave no man standing in order to stamp out the threat.

Following too many fractured storylines and clocking in at about 45 minutes longer than it should, director Lawrence Kasdan’s rendering of this simple Stephen King yarn is entirely too ambitious. Attempting to turn King’s Bgrade “little green men” tale into an intelligent, nuanced story about the fears without and within, Kasdan fails to make his film into the only logical thing it should have been: a campy horror flick. Instead, the director tries to soberly meld an insane Army captain (complete with a gun given to him by John Wayne), a mass alien invasion and slimy, man-eating, oversized parasites with the stuff of mature drama.

In the end, as apropos as it was to name the evil E.T. force “The Ripley,” the effect only recalls the classic sci-fi film that did all this so much better.

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ometimes it is worth waiting 32 years for a movie remake, but that’s debatable in the case of “Willard.” Of course, only a fraction of its viewers will remember the 1971 original.

That was a surprise hit, the tale of a lonely fella, Willard Stiles, and his love for a genial white rat, Socrates. And there was Ben, the big, bad, brown rodent, the rat pack leader who went on to star in the sequel, “Ben.” The scariest thing about this remake is the crazed conviction of Crispin Glover as Willard. But then the weird Glover, whose hair is like an oil spill tamed, has made a career of crazed conviction. He could spook the Addams Family, maybe even Charles Addams.

Tall, pale, with a vaguely tubercular charisma, Glover hurls himself into demented sincerity and rat mania. In 1971, Bruce Davison was just a very good young actor texturing the pulp demands of the role (in this movie, he becomes a painted portrait).

Glover is a smaller talent, but a far bigger fruitcake. As a cop says with stunning redundancy near the end, “This guy’s a nut.”

R. Lee Ermey, the big meanie with the lead-pipe voice that could shrivel even Saddam Hussein, is now Willard’s rotten boss in place of Ernest Borgnine. As Willard’s sick mom, instead of Elsa Lanchester there is Jackie Burroughs, so gruesomely near-death that she makes Mrs. Bates in “Psycho” seem like a health-shake fanatic.

Glen Morgan adapted and directed Gilbert Ralston’s old story, which can sort of make you love and hate rats at the same time. There is a fine old house full of morbid shadows and thick furniture, but the violent payoffs are predictable and fairly tame – the best (not for kitty lovers) is when the rats gang up on a cat.

What puzzles you, if you care to think about more than Glover’s hair, or the Jackson Pollock display of rat drops all over Willard’s house, is that Morgan and Glover must have thought they were devoutly remaking a classic. The shots often have a solemn weightiness, as if Morgan alternated reading “Rat Wrangling: More Than a Hobby!” with viewing “The Magnificent Ambersons.”

A story like this has to tickle itself – without comedy it would be too scary or too stupid to bear – and the result is inevitably morbid kitsch. As Willard lingers in bed with Socrates (no, not what you’re thinking), and then the bully Ben climbs up the covers to make a threesome, you can only wish mom would join the party.

Plot sense? Don’t be dumb. Willard packs about 3,000 rats into a few suitcases. The pretty new girl at the office has eyes for Willard, which makes you wonder about her sanity. At the office, even the pompous boss arrives in a freight elevator.

If there is another “Ben,” please cross it with “Braveheart.” Hairy rats in kilts.

Ben, rat rebel in blue! The Brits, mere mice, taking snuff as they nibble cheese.

65

MOVIE CLOCK REGAL AUGUSTA EXCHANGE 20 Movies Good 3/21 - 3/27 Dreamcatcher (R) 12:00, 12:30, 3:15, 3:45, 7:00, 7:20, 10:05, 10:25 Boat Trip (R) Fri-Sat: 12:40, 3:00, 5:15, 9:40, 11:55; Sun-Thur: 12:40, 3:00, 5:15, 9:40 Piglet’s Big Movie (G) 12:35, 2:40, 4:35, 7:00 View From the Top (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:50, 3:05, 5:30, 7:35, 9:50, 12:15; Sun-Thur: 12:50, 3:05, 5:30, 7:35, 9:50 Tears of the Sun (R) 1:05, 3:55, 7:25, 10:10 Willard (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:30, 2:55, 5:20, 7:40, 10:00, 12:25; Sun-Thur: 12:30, 2:55, 5:20, 7:40, 10:00 The Hunted (R) Fri-Sat: 12:15, 1:20, 2:35, 3:35, 4:55, 5:45, 7:15, 8:15, 9:45, 10:30, 12:05; SunThur: 12:15, 1:20, 2:35, 3:35, 4:55, 5:45, 7:15, 8:15, 9:45, 10:30 Agent Cody Banks (PG) Fri-Sat: 12:20, 1:30, 2:45, 4:15, 5:10, 7:20, 9:50, 12:15; Sun-Thur: 12:20, 1:30, 2:45, 4:15, 5:10, 7:20, 9:50 Bringing Down the House (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 12:45, 2:00, 3:10, 4:30, 5:30, 7:05, 8:00, 9:35, 10:25, 12:10; Sun-Thur: 12:45, 2:00, 3:10, 4:30, 5:30, 7:05, 8:00, 9:35, 10:25 Cradle 2 the Grave (R) 12:25, 2:50, 5:15, 7:50, 10:20 Daredevil (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 11:55, 2:30, 5:00, 7:30, 9:55, 12:20; Sun-Thur: 11:55, 2:30, 5:00, 7:30, 9:55 Jungle Book 2 (G) 12:00, 1:45, 3:30, 5:25 Old School (R) Fri-Sat: 12:05, 2:15, 4:40, 7:35, 10:05, 12:30; Sun-Thur: 12:05, 2:15, 4:40, 7:35, 10:05 Deliver Us From Eva (R) 7:30, 10:30 Shanghai Knights (PG-13) 7:20, 10:00 How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 1:25, 4:05, 6:55, 9:25, 12:00; Sun-Thur: 1:25, 4:05, 6:55, 9:25 Final Destination 2 (R) 12:10, 2:25, 5:05, 7:45, 10:15 The Recruit (PG-13) 9:30 Chicago (PG-13) Fri-Sat: 1:15, 4:00, 6:50, 9:20, 11:50; Sun-Thur: 1:15, 4:00, 6:50, 9:20 EVANS 12 CINEMAS Movies Good 3/21 - 3/27 Boat Trip (R) Fri: 3:50, 5:50, 7:50, 9:50; SatSun: 1:50, 3:50, 5:50, 7:50, 9:50; Mon-Thur: 5:50, 7:50, 9:50 Dreamcatcher (R) Fri: 4:00, 6:55, 9:45; SatSun: 1:00, 4:00, 6:55, 9:45; Mon-Thur: 4:00, 6:55, 9:45 View From the Top (PG-13) Fri: 3:35, 5:35, 7:35, 9:35; Sat-Sun: 1:35, 3:35, 5:35, 7:35, 9:35; Mon-Thur: 5:35, 7:35, 9:35 Piglet’s Big Movie (G) Fri: 3:15, 5:15, 7:15; Sat-Sun: 1:15, 3:15, 5:15, 7:15; Mon-Thur: 5:15, 7:15 The Hunted (R) Fri: 3:10, 5:20, 7:40, 9:55; SatSun: 1:05, 3:10, 5:20, 7:40, 9:55; Mon-Thur: 5:20, 7:40, 9:55

M E T R O

Agent Cody Banks (PG) Fri: 4:20, 7:05, 9:30; Sat-Sun: 1:45, 4:20, 7:05, 9:30; Mon-Thur: 4:20, 7:05, 9:30 Tears of the Sun (R) Fri: 4:10, 7:10, 9:40; SatSun: 1:10, 4:10, 7:10, 9:40; Mon-Thur: 4:10, 7:10, 9:40 Bringing Down the House (PG-13) Fri-Sun: 2:10, 4:40, 7:30, 9:50; Mon-Thur: 4:40, 7:30, 9:50 Old School (R) 9:25 The Pianist (R) 9:15 Jungle Book 2 (G) Fri: 3:25, 5:25, 7:25; Sat-Sun: 1:25, 3:25, 5:25, 7:25; Mon-Thur: 5:25, 7:25 Daredevil (PG-13) Fri: 3:05, 5:30, 7:45, 10:00; Sat-Sun: 12:55, 3:05, 5:30, 7:45, 10:00; MonThur: 5:30, 7:45, 10:00 How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days (PG-13) Fri-Sun: 2:20, 4:50, 7:20, 9:40; Mon-Thur: 4:50, 7:20, 9:40 Chicago (PG-13) Fri-Sun: 2:00, 4:30, 7:00, 9:20; Mon-Thur: 4:30, 7:00, 9:20 MASTERS 7 CINEMAS Movies Good 3/21 - 3/27 View From the Top (PG-13) Fri: 5:25, 8:05, 10:10; Sat: 2:55, 5:25, 8:05, 10:10; Sun: 2:55, 5:25, 8:05; Mon-Thur: 5:25, 8:05 Dreamcatcher (R) Fri: 4:15, 7:00, 9:45; Sat: 1:30, 4:15, 7:00, 9:45; Sun: 1:30, 4:15, 7:00; Mon-Thur: 4:15, 7:00 The Hunted (R) Fri: 5:15, 7:45, 10:00; Sat: 2:45, 5:15, 7:45, 10:00; Sun: 2:45, 5:15, 7:45; Mon-Thur: 5:15, 7:45 Agent Cody Banks (PG) Fri: 5:00, 7:35; Sat: 2:30, 5:00, 7:35; Sun: 2:30, 5:00; Mon-Thur: 5:00 Willard (PG-13) Fri: 5:30, 8:00, 10:15; Sat: 3:00, 5:30, 8:00, 10:15; Sun: 3:00, 5:30, 8:00; Mon-Thur: 5:30, 8:00 Bringing Down the House (PG-13) Fri: 5:10, 7:40, 10:05; Sat: 2:40, 5:10, 7:40, 10:05; Sun: 2:40, 5:10, 7:40; Mon-Thur: 5:10, 7:40 Tears of the Sun (R) Fri: 5:05, 7:30, 9:50; Sat: 2:00, 5:05, 7:30, 9:50; Sun: 2:00, 5:05, 7:30; Mon-Thur: 5:05, 7:30 Cradle 2 the Grave (R) Fri-Sat: 9:45; SunThur: 7:35 REGAL 12 CINEMAS Movies Good 3/21 - 3/27 Catch Me If You Can (PG-13) 2:15, 5:00, 8:00 Dark Blue (R) 2:25, 4:55, 7:20, 9:50 The Life of David Gale (R) 1:55, 4:35, 7:15, 9:50 Two Weeks Notice (PG-13) 2:00, 4:25, 7:35, 9:55 Biker Boyz (PG-13) 2:05, 4:30, 7:00, 9:35 Wild Thornberrys (PG) 2:30, 4:20, 7:30, 10:05 Maid in Manhat tan (PG-13) 2:10, 4:40, 7:00, 9:20 Drumline (PG-13) 2:15, 4:40, 7:15, 9:50 Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (PG) 2:00, 5:15, 9:15 Die Another Day (PG-13) 1:55, 4:35, 7:10, 9:45 Friday After Nex t (R) 2:30, 4:45, 7:40, 9:30 The Ring (PG-13) 2:40, 5:00, 7:25, 9:40

Movie listings are subject to change without notice.

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Music

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Garden City Music Fest This Weekend

BY LISA JORDAN

D

on’t forget the Garden City Music Festival, happening this Saturday, March 22, at Augusta Common. The festival features 20 acts on two stages throughout the day, as well as food, arts and crafts and beer. Tickets are $7 in advance and $10 at the gate, and are available at the Greater Augusta Arts Council office in Sacred Heart Cultural Center, the Metro Coffeehouse, Lokal Loudness and Nacho Mamas and CDs and more. For more info, contact the Greater Augusta Arts Council at 8264702 or check out www.augustaarts.com.

Please note that performance times are subject to change.

Augusta Rowing Club Stage Reynolds Street 12:00-12:30 – Eryn Eubanks and the Fold 1:00-1:30 – Pat Blanchard 2:00-2:30 – Three Sixty 3:00-3:30 – People Who Must 4:00-4:30 – The Hellblinki Sextet 5:00-5:30 – Tara Scheyer and the Half-Shirt Leroys 6:00-6:30 – Horsepower 7:00-7:30 – Jemani 8:00-8:45 – Chariot Reggae Band 9:30-10:15 – Ph Balance D. Timm’s Jazz Cafe Stage Broad Street 12:30-1:00 – The Vellotones 1:30-2:00 – The Livingroom Legends 2:30-3:00 – Shaun Piazza 3:30-4:00 – The Bee’s Knees Jazz Trio 4:30-5:00 – Russell Joel Brown 5:30-6:00 – Kitty Snyder 6:30-7:00 – 420 Outback 7:30-8:00 – The Big Mighty 8:45-9:30 – Stewart & Winfield 10:15-11:00 – The Kevn Kinney Band

KITTY SNYDER

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he comedian GALLAGHER once said, "I wish there was a button on my television so I could turn up the intelligence. There is a knob called brightness, but it doesn't seem to work."

Even though there wasn't any evidence of a "sledge-o-matic" anywhere, there certainly wasn't anything dull about last week's Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony in New York. The show's highlights (broadcast on VH1) were a terrific two hours of rock and all its trappings.THE POLICE, THE CLASH, ELVIS COSTELLO and THE RIGHTEOUS BROTHERS were the main honorees of the evening.

The Police performed on stage for the first time since the late ‘80s and turned in a short but exciting three-song set of "Roxanne," "Message in a Bottle" and "Every Breath You Take." Although STING and drummer STEWART COPELAND'S disagreements have probably kept the group from re-forming since the breakup, all was fine during the performance. Guitarist ANDY SUMMERS, like his two ex-bandmates, sounded tight and together as if the group had never called it quits. Newcomer JOHN MAYER saw his stock rising even higher as the singer joined the trio near the end of "Every Breath You Take."

ELVIS COSTELLO AND THE ATTRACTIONS also didn't sound cold and rusty, mainly because they still play together regularly.

Elvis and band, inducted by ELTON JOHN, roared through "Deep Dark Mirror" and "(What's So Funny ‘Bout) Peace, Love, & Understanding."

The surviving members of the Clash

Will build out to suit

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Veteran filmmaker MICHAEL MOORE ("Roger and Me," "Bowling For Columbine") has directed the new SYSTEM OF A DOWN video for their latest single, "Boom!" To no one's surprise, Moore's take on the song's antiwar message is bound to stir it up BOB MARLEY style with shots of pro-peace marchers along with satirical footage of many of the political principals. The song is the second single issued from the band's latest disc, "Steal This Album."

Back to the South. TED NUGENT, ZZ TOP, KENNY WAYNE SHEPERD and DOUBLE TROUBLE will hit the road this spring for the "Beer Drinkers and Hell Raisers Tour." The U.S. jaunt visits Charlotte's Verizon Amphitheater May 10. ZZ Top will be promoting their latest studio offering, "Mescalero," which includes a cover of the OTIS REDDING-CARLA THOMAS hit "Tramp," as well as the hysterical "Punk Ass Boyfriend." The band has a box set in the works as well.

Turner's Quick Takes LED ZEPPELIN has a five-hour performance DVD set for release in May ... The DAVE MATTHEWS BAND returns to Charlotte Sept. 16 at Verizon ... A reissue of the immortal "Howlin' Wolf London Sessions" has twelve bonus tracks featuring greats such as STEVE WINWOOD and ERIC CLAPTON ... "Dirty," the 1992 classic from SONIC YOUTH, was reissued this month with all sorts of bonus goodies ...

Bluesman RONNIE EARL has a newie, "I Feel Like Goin' On," in stores now ...

Turner's Rock and Roll Jeopardy A. This Los Angeles-based band was founded by MAURICE WHITE and PHILIP BAILEY.

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were inducted but did not play. Lead singer JOE STRUMMER'S unexpected death last December cast an understandable shade of grey on the festivities. Also among the honorees were '60s hitmakers The Righteous Brothers, who turned in a solid rendition of the BARRY MANNCYNTHIS WEIL standard "You've Lost That Lovin' Feeling."

SYSTEM OF A DOWN

BY

Q. Who is Earth, Wind and Fire?

68

ED TURNER

: : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : Truth is stranger than fiction!

See News of the Weird P. 72

MUSIC

TUESDAYS

WAYNE CAPPS

MINIS

Mark Knopfler Breaks Body in Motorcycle Crash On March 17, 53-year-old Mark Knopfler, of Dire Straits fame, was hurt in a motorcycle crash that broke six of his ribs and a collarbone. He smacked a Fiat Punto in London, and, well ... the Fiat won. He’s OK, though – back home and recuperating. Probably popping himself in the head and saying “D’oh!” a lot.

He’s going to have to sit out a March 25 gig he had planned at London’s Royal Albert Hall, but is still planning to tour Europe, beginning in April, and North America, beginning June 26.

Whatever Happened to Freedom of Speech?

Well, radio stations are playing the Dixie Chicks again. Guess they’ve learned their lesson, excercising their freedom of speech like that. Who do they think they are – Americans?

You’ve probably heard what got everybody’s panties in a wad – one of the Chicks said that she was ashamed she and G.W. share a home state. It’s OK now, though. She took it back after 15

All Night

of Billboard’s 148 country stations banned her group for a day.

System of a Down Protest War In a similar vein, System of a Down have made a clip to protest the impending war. It’s called “Boom!” and Serj Tankian says it’s because the anti-war movement is getting too little press.

The beginning of the “Boom!” song was written by guitarist Daron Malakian during the Gulf War. He has family in Iraq.

Bling Bling Rapper Ja Rule blew off a live appearance on an Australian television show last weekend — to gamble. Ja Rule, on a winning streak, failed to show up for a scheduled interview alongside singer Ashanti on Australia’s Channel V. Ashanti had to go it alone, and later Ja Rule was spotted signing $50 bills and handing them out to fans. He declined to comment on his winnings, but Australian news sources gave an estimate of $50,000.

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Catch Nocturne at the Riviera in Atlanta March 27.

Thursday, 20th The Bee’s Knees - Jazz Piano with James McEntyre Cafe Du Teau - Bernard Chambers Casi’s Kitchen - Buzz Clif ford Club Argos - Karaoke Night Coliseum - Karaoke, High-Energy Dance Music Continuum - Playa*Listic Thursday with DJ FAB Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Fox’s Lair - Keith “Fossill” Gregory Greene Streets - Men’s Country and Western National Karaoke Contest Joe’s Underground - Mike Baideme Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - Patrick Blanchard and Guests Orange Moon - Spoken Word Poetry Playground - Open Mic Stool Pigeons - Jason and Michael Time Piecez - DJ Dance Par ty Whiskey Junction - DJ Chaos

Friday, 21st The Big Easy - Air Apparent Blind Pig - Shameless Dave and the Miracle Whips

Borders - Carl Purdy Cafe Du Teau - Bernard Chambers Capri Cinema - Cries of the Dying, Paint the Sky Red, Angelhead Casi’s Kitchen - Buzz Clif ford Club Argos - Argos Angels Cabaret Coconuts - DJs Doug and Eric Coliseum - Natalie, Stephanie Ross Continuum - Get Real Records Cotton Patch - John Kolbeck Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads - Par t-Time Heroes, Filmstar D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Durango’s - Magic Hat Fox’s Lair - Roger Enevoldsen Greene Streets - Karaoke Highlander - Heavy Dose Joe’s Underground - Pat Blanchard Last Call - Tony Howard, DJ Richie Rich Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - The Ear thling Shannon’s - Bar t Bell Surrey Tavern - Playback Tops Lounge - The Inhibitors Villa Europa - Stephen Phillips Whiskey Junction - Wa x Bean, DJ Paul Whiskey Road Oyster Factory - Bogie

Saturday, 22nd The Bee’s Knees - Jazz Sessions featuring Moniker Blind Pig - Shameless Dave and the Miracle Whips Borders - David Firmin Cafe Du Teau - Bernard Chambers Casi’s Kitchen - Buzz Clif ford Club Argos - Argos Angels Cabaret, Tower Blackout Par ty Coconuts - DJs Doug and Eric Coliseum - Circuit City Par ty with DJ Patrick Continuum - Silence, Cycle Cotton Patch - Kool Kats Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band Crossroads - Club Sin Dance Par ty with DJ Chris D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Ex press Durango’s - Magic Hat Fox’s Lair - Roger Enevoldsen Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Medicine Hat Last Call - Tony Howard, DJ Richie Rich Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Modjeska - DJ Boriqua Shannon’s - Jar Surrey Tavern - Playback

71 M E T R O S P I R I T M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

The boys of Silence perform March 22 at Club Continuum.

Crossroads - The Family Trucksters D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Greene Streets - Women’s Country and Western National Karaoke Contest Joe’s Underground - John Kolbeck Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Playground - Karaoke Shannon’s - Keith “Fossill” Gregory Somewhere in Augusta - Jason Sabo

Cafe Du Teau - Bernard Chambers Casi’s Kitchen - Buzz Clif ford Pizza Joint - Rachel and Will The Shack - Karaoke Shannon’s - Tony Howard Somewhere in Augusta - Doug and Henry Whiskey Junction - Karaoke by Tom

Upcoming

Monday, 24th Continuum - Monday Madness with DJ Nick Snow Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Ruskin

Tuesday, 25th Adams Nightclub - Karaoke with Bill Tolber t Casi’s Kitchen - Buzz Clif ford Coliseum - Tournament Tuesday D. Timm’s - Joe Patchen and the Blue Diamond Express Greene Streets - Karaoke Joe’s Underground - Ruskin Michael’s - Marilyn Adcock Stool Pigeons - Karaoke with Linda Eubanks Surrey Tavern - Tuesday Night Jam Session with Pat Blanchard and Friends

Wednesday, 26th Casi’s Kitchen - Buzz Clif ford Coliseum - Wet ‘n’ Wild Talent Search Continuum - Open Mic Jam Sessions Coyote’s - The Rhes Reeves Band

Benna - Capri Cinema - March 29 Ra - Crossroads - April 1 Oleander - Crossroads - April 2 Swingin’ Medallions - Last Call - April 9, 12

Elsewhere Old Blind Dogs - The Handlebar, Greenville, S.C. - March 20 Project/Object - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta March 21 Earl Scruggs, The Blind Boys of Alabama - The Tabernacle, Atlanta - March 21 Dezeray’s Hammer - The Handlebar, Greenville, S.C. - March 21 Sister Hazel, Indigo Girls, Edwin McCain Ear thlink Live, Atlanta - March 22 Trout Fishing in America, Cast Iron Filter - The Handlebar, Greenville, S.C. - March 22 2 Skinnee J’s - Senate Park, Columbia, S.C. - March 22; The Handlebar, Greenville, S.C. - March 24 Duncan Sheik - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - March 23 Folk Implosion - Echo Lounge, Atlanta - March 26 The Red Elvises - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - March 26; The Handlebar, Greenville, S.C. - March 28 Sigur Ros - Tabernacle, Atlanta - March 27 Dave Mason, Don Humphries - The Handlebar, Greenville, S.C. - March 27

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Many tickets are available through TicketMaster outlets, by calling 828-7700, or online at w w w.ticketmaster.com. Tickets may also be available through Tix Online by calling 278-4TIX or online at w w w.tixonline.com. Night Life listings are subject to change without notice.

Deadline for inclusion in Night Life calendar is Tuesday at 4 p.m. Contact Rhonda Jones or Lisa Jordan by calling 738-1142, fa xing 736-0443 or e-mailing to rhonda_jones@metspirit.com or lisa_jordan@metspirit.com.

•• •• ••

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Atlanta - May 2-4 Avril Lavigne - The Arena at Gwinnet t Center, Duluth, Ga. - May 8 Willie Nelson - Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta - May 16 Rick Springfield - Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta - May 17 Dave Chappelle - The Tabernacle, Atlanta - May 18 Kenny Loggins - Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta - May 25 Earth, Wind & Fire - Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta - May 26 James Taylor - Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta - June 2 David Lee Roth - Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta - June 6 Dan Fogelberg - Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta - June 8 Olivia New ton-John - Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta - June 15 Peter Gabriel - Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta - June 16 Heart - Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta June 22 Aretha Franklin - Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta - June 24 Boston - Chastain Park Amphitheatre, Atlanta June 29

•• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• •• • •

Sunday, 23rd

Nocturne - Riviera, Atlanta - March 27 Athenaeum - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - March 27 Slightly Stoopid - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - March 29 Ronnie Bowman, Robert Bradley, Josh Joplin The Handlebar, Greenville, S.C. - March 29 Annie Lennox - Woodruf f Ar ts Center, Atlanta March 30 Lyricist Lounge - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - March 30 Hot Hot Heat - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - March 31 Insane Clown Posse, 2 Live Crew Masquerade, Atlanta - April 2 Rebirth Brass Band, Mofro - Georgia Theatre, Athens, Ga. - April 3 Oleander - Cot ton Club, Atlanta - April 3 Vic Chesnutt - Echo Lounge, Atlanta - April 4 Springing the Blues Music Festival - Seawalk Plaza, Jacksonville Beach, Fla. - April 4-6 Jimmie Vaughan - Roxy Theatre, Atlanta - April 5 Taproot, Chevelle - Roxy Theatre, Atlanta - April 6 Zwan - The Tabernacle, Atlanta - April 7 All-American Rejects - Cot ton Club, Atlanta April 9 The Used - 40 Wat t Club, Athens, Ga. - April 9; Roxy Theatre, Atlanta - April 11 George Lopez - Tabernacle, Atlanta - April 11 Jimmy Buffett - HiFi Buys Amphitheatre, Atlanta - April 17 Pearl Jam - HiFi Buys Amphitheatre, Atlanta April 19 Guster - The Tabernacle, Atlanta - April 19 Suwannee Bound Festival - Spirit of Suwannee Music Park, Live Oak, Fla. - April 19-20 Ellen DeGeneres - Woodruf f Ar ts Center, Atlanta - April 20 Taking Back Sunday - Cotton Club, Atlanta - April 23 Cher - Philips Arena, Atlanta - April 25 Superfly Jazz Fest - Various Venues, New Orleans, La. - April 25-May 4 Widespread Panic - Savannah Civic Center, Savannah, Ga. - April 29 Music Midtown Festival - Various Venues,

••• ••• ••• •••

Villa Europa - Stephen Phillips Whiskey Junction - Wa x Bean Whiskey Road Oyster Factory - Jon Durham

••• •• •• ••

Air Apparent plays at The Big Easy March 21.

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Weird M

aking a claim on British television in March that should alarm all News of the Weird readers, James Watson (co-discoverer of the structure of DNA) said he saw no reason why “stupidity” could not some day be corrected by gene therapy, just as other “disorders” are now being addressed. “If you’re really stupid, I would call that a disease,” he said, on the Channel 4 documentary “DNA.” “I’d like to get rid of (stupidity).”

• Two TV stations reported in February that Paul West of Winsted, Conn., had taken the then-current Homeland Security alerts very seriously and covered his entire house, top to bottom, with 3,500 square feet of plastic sheeting to “protect” against “radiological or biological or chemical attack,” he said. West, his wife and two children live on a farm outside Winsted, in northern Connecticut, about 120 miles from New York City. Said West, “I just have all this energy from tension and anxiety (about terrorism), and I don’t know what to do with it.”

America’s Worsening Gullibility Problem • According to a December Federal Trade Commission lawsuit, Mark Nutritionals Inc., of San Antonio, Texas, earned $190 million in four years selling a $40 solution that guaranteed weight loss even if the user ate lots of pizza, beer, tacos and doughnuts. And in November, the new Kaiser Medical Center hospital in Fremont, Calif., staged a special ceremony, by the hospital’s chaplain, using symbols and inspirational words on rocks, to battle “spirits” that some nurses believed were responsible for beds moving and doors slamming on their own. And at a press conference in Boise, Idaho, in December, Genesis World Energy spokespeople introduced the Edison Device, which they said will produce 20 years’ worth of electricity for a home using only a bathtub’s worth of water as fuel (but reporters could not examine it or ask any questions about it).

Backlog of Least Competent Criminals • Charles Edward Jones was convicted in February of robbing a Wachovia Bank in Miami with the key evidence being a DNA match to two gold teeth that were knocked out of his mouth when he stepped into a street during his getaway and was hit by a school lunch van. Compounding his lack of clear getaway thinking was the fact that he had just fired his gun into his pants as he tried to stuff it into his waistband.

• In Washington, D.C., in February, Ronald T. Stephenson, 20, was convicted of murder in an out-of-control June 2000 robbery. The key police evidence was a videotape of Stephenson subsequently confessing to the crime in a visit to the home of his partner, Dwight Walker (who had, unbeknownst to Stephenson, become an informant). On the tape, Stephenson is heard to tell Walker that

there is no way the police can get him for the murder unless, for example, they somehow caught him admitting on videotape that he did it.

• Timothy Baker was back in jail in Waco, Texas, in January, hours after he had escaped while being held for aggravated robbery. His getaway had taken him to Baylor University, where he broke into a building in order to find a change of clothes from his orange jumpsuit. The building was the Fine Arts Center, where Baker raided a costume closet. He apparently thought he would be inconspicuous if he changed into a 19th-century green wool costume (with rubber galoshes) that made him look like a “leprechaun,” said the sheriff later, after Baker was spotted on the street and rearrested. Said the chairman of the theater department, “He just really stood out.”

• Police in Overland Park, Kan., arrested a 29-year-old man from Virginia on New Year’s Eve (but his partner escaped) and charged him with defrauding the Embassy Suites Hotel by using two stolen $500 money orders to obtain cash. By the time the hotel discovered that the money orders were bogus, the two men had checked out of their rooms, but fortunately, the 29-year-old man had just returned to the hotel because he had forgotten to get his $20 room deposit back.

He was arrested without incident.

• In Northampton, Mass., in December, and several months earlier in Spokane, Wash., marijuana traffickers’ operations came to an end when they made routine business deposits of cash but failed to notice that their money reeked of the scent of marijuana. Arlene and Martin Santor of Wallingford, Vt., handed $50,000 in $20 bills to a smell-sensitive jailor in Northampton to bail their daughter out on drug charges, and Kathleen Jenny and Virginia Erickson made cash bank deposits to a smell-sensitive teller in Spokane (which led to their trafficking conviction in January 2003).

• In January, Devon Harris, 19, and Shemone Gordon, 23, were charged with kidnapping millionaire investment manager Edward Lampert outside his office in Greenwich, Conn., and attempting to ransom him, but Harris’ mother and Gordon’s aunt both told reporters later that their boys are just not smart enough to pull off a kidnapping like that. The kidnappers abandoned their plan after three hours and released Lampert, but were arrested a short time later when police traced their whereabouts after the men used Lampert’s credit card to order a pizza delivery.

• Rick Kowalewski, 41, and Matthew Bracelin, 20, were charged with fraud in November for selling bogus designer clothes from a booth in Osage, Iowa. Police seized $25,000 worth of shirts with Tommy Hilfiger, Nike and Ralph Lauren logos but whose neck tags said Fruit of the Loom.

• Aaron Bell, 19, was convicted in December of robbing a Kentucky Fried Chicken store in Philadelphia 12 months earlier. It was the same KFC where Bell had worked for the previous two years; he wore no mask or disguise, and all the employees recognized him. He might have learned in those two years that the store’s safe is timelocked at 9 p.m., but he started the robbery at 9:15 and thus got no money. Nonetheless, Bell successfully hid from police for three days. On the third day, he decided to report for work at the KFC, acting as if nothing had happened. The manager called police.

— Chuck Shepherd © United Press Syndicate

viso is that you have to be willing to take theirs.”

If your approach to intimate communion has even a shred of this vulgar stupidity, Virgo, you’re now in prime time to banish it from your repertoire forever. You’ll attract uncanny luck and inspiration whenever you work in a way opposite to Mailer’s; that is to say, when you train yourself to call up all the beauty you hide from the world and offer it up to the person closest to you.

Brezsny's Free Will Astrology ARIES (March 21-April 19)

When you’re at your best, Aries, you see the cracks in the facades as opportunities; you get giddy as you careen over bumps in the road; you love the enticing magic that flows from situations that other people regard as rough or crooked.

Since you will soon be at your best again, I expect you’ll be encountering a surge of juicy serendipity.

Here’s a quote to incite you, courtesy of Aries poet Charles Baudelaire. “That which is not slightly distorted lacks sensible appeal: from which it follows that irregularity — that is to say, the unexpected, surprise and astonishment, are an essential part and characteristic of beauty.”

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

One of your reliable tools isn’t broken yet, but I advise you to fix it before it is. A power failure will occur soon unless you take steps to prevent a system overload. The monster in your closet is still safely asleep, which is why I urge you to call in an exorcist or exterminator now, before it wakes up. Are you catching my drift, Taurus? Because you’ve been smart and lucky enough to tune in to this horoscope, you have all the forewarning you need to prevent a crisis.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20)

You know how a song can get stuck in your head and won’t leave you alone? The astrological omens say you’ll be unusually susceptible to this phenomenon in the coming week. I suggest, therefore, that you immediately begin working to ensure that you’ll be invaded by only the most inspiring and motivating songs. As soon as you’re finished reading this horoscope, make a list of your top five, then hum them for a while. Want some suggestions? How about “Clean Out My Closet,” by Eminem or “I See God in You,” by India Arie? Or maybe “The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill,” which ends with the lines “Deep in my heart the answer was in me/ And I made up my mind to find my own destiny.”

ACROSS

CANCER (June 21-July 22)

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

Many otherwise intelligent people cling to a perverse model of intimacy articulated by Norman Mailer. As reported in Leah Garchik’s column in the San Francisco Chronicle, Mailer described marriage as “an excretory relationship, in which you take all the crap you hide from the world and dump it on the person closest to you. But the pro-

31 Sheikdom of

New York Times Crossword Puzzle

ANSWER TO PREVIOUS PUZZLE

B F A C I C L S S H R A S H

R O L F E

P L E A D E A R N N C E A L H O A R T I E E

L I M B

T A F F E T A

A L I A S

W O R S T

R A I D I N N A N E D A T O S H O N P G L O R O T E W

S T E P R I S T W A A T I N B S E I A D M E E R

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

In his book “Animals and Psychedelics,” ethnobotanist Giorgio Samorini proves that many animals deliberately alter their consciousness. His evidence includes robins that get drunk on holly berries and act “like winged clowns,” as well as goats that are dependent on caffeine and reindeer that seek out hallucinogenic mushrooms. Samorini concludes that the desire to get high is a natural drive. He suggests that intoxication has served as an evolutionary force for some species, breaking down outworn habits in such a way as to improve long-term survival. All this is prelude to my advice for you, Leo: You now have a cosmic mandate to shed your shticks and expand your awareness. Since you’re not just an animal, but also an ingenious human, you don’t have to resort to drugs and alcohol to do it. But you should do it.

song (Sheryl Crow 32 Regarded song) guardedly 6 Singer in Bob 33 Enlivens Dylan’s Rolling 35 Shrimp dish Thunder Revue 41 Bric-a-___ 10 Clinches 45 Diamond 14 Afghan, e.g. situation after a 15 Director single hit Wertmuller 46 Nonchalant 16 Clammy gait?

17 Number one 51 Trap assistant, 52 Hubbubs strictly speaking?

53 Without limit 20 Some degree 54 Doo-wop hits, e.g.

21 Posted 56 Has markers 22 Orwell’s “Animal out Farm,” e.g.

58 Cleveland ___, 23 Lbs. and ozs.

O. 25 Pain 60 Where farm 27 Instruction for workers take a casual dress dip?

28 Going around a 63 Indigo plant clock every 64 Chip in minute?

A D E L E

Your word of power in the coming weeks will be stretch. Intone it as a mantra 55 times a day and write it in red ink on an index card that you keep in a prominent place in your environment. In addition, Libra, I urge you to regularly embody these three meanings of stretch: 1. to make longer, wider, or bigger without breaking or tearing; 2. to straighten and extend your body to its full span so as to increase circulation and forestall cramps; 3. to carry out a demanding task that requires you to enlarge your capacities or go beyond what you thought was possible for you to do.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)

1 “All I ___ Do”

T I T A N

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

Just before my friend Juliana received the phone call informing her she’d gotten the dream job she’d applied for, she’d been devoutly depressed, reading tabloids and eating doughnuts in her pajamas at 2 p.m. When my friend Jessie got the call informing him he’d been chosen as a back-up singer for the world tour of a group he’d idolized for years, he was recovering from a nasty hangover while playing video games with his 10-year-old nephew, whose family was letting him freeload during his fifth month of unemployment. I’m not saying the lightning bolt that will illuminate your world will be as dramatic as these two examples, Cancerian; but a lightning bolt is a lightning bolt.

C O L O N E L R I E N

S H O U T A T

P A R T

A N R A E N S

M E L E D A R V D I R O O L P A

U P R S I I S E A T I N

S N O O T

65 Place for a

hawk 66 Burns and Allen: Abbr.

67 Doldrums, for one 68 “Texaco Star Theater” star

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SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

I found a love note in the trashcan at the post office. It was addressed to “My Succulent, Surging, Sagacious Sagittarius” from “Your Perfectly Imperfect Instigator.” “Let’s be radically curious explorers together,” Instigator told Sagittarius. “Let’s bushwhack through the wilds in search of the rawest truths that the laws of nature will allow us to dive into.” I was shocked to find this thing discarded. What Archer in his or her right mind would throw away such a provocative invitation? Please don’t do anything resembling

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Named Desire” role 7 Is of value, slangily 8 Eliminate 9 Eliminates by remote control 10 Words of agreement 11 Per ___ 12 Chef Lagasse 13 Wild time 18 Cattle rancher’s unit 19 Called 24 Sad sounds 26 Suffix with ethyl28 Weaken 29 School situated at Washington Sq. 30 Person with a practice: Abbr.

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Puzzle by Manny Nosowsky

37 “The King and I” 43 Expand

character 38 Hamburg honorific 39 Barbie feature, at times 40 Like Mahler’s Symphony No. 4 42 Carrier of genetic info

$1.99 per minute • 18 & over • Touchtone phone required • C/S 612-373-9785 • www.freewillastrology.com/

44 Packed 46 Reading e-mail,

e.g.

47 Movie technique 48 Gimcrackery

GIFT CERTIFICATES AVAILABLE!

YaYa Beads Beading Supplies

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1-900-950-7700

Classes available, sterling silver, hand blown glass beads and much more!

34 41

You Can Call Rob Brezsny, day or night, for your Expanded Weekly Horoscope

YaYa Beads!

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PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)

Back in 1985, when my roommate Arlena asked her new acquaintance, Joey the escaped convict, to stay at our house for a few weeks, I overcame my propensity to be an overly patient, absurdly accommodating doormat. “There is no way in hell that Joey will ever spend even a night here,” I told Arlena firmly, and despite her protests, I prevailed.

I have an intuition that you will receive a comparable opportunity to exercise a strong and lucid new version of your willpower in the coming week, Pisces.

— © Rob Brezsny

around at

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AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

It’s one of those blessed times when you’ll heighten your attractiveness by thinking more deeply; when pursuing higher education will help you create conditions in which you can better satisfy your desires; when you can make yourself sexier by becoming smarter, and vice versa. In the spirit of this happy confluence of id and intellect, I offer you a few librarian pick-up lines, gleaned from www.lisnews.com. 1. “I’d luuuuuv to check you out.” 2. “I couldn’t help noticing what a great book bag you have.” 3. “Are you a librarian, because when you walked in the room I knew I was overdue.”

Just beadin’

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CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

I’m not writing this horoscope, Capricorn. You are.

I’m channeling it from the depths of your innermost mind. Why? Your conscious ego has been so caught up in the daily whirl that it has been steadfastly ignoring an important message from your still, small voice, which is why your still, small voice has drafted me to be its envoy. Here’s what it wants you to know: You desperately need to tune in to the still, small voice. The communiqué it has to convey to you is simple and brief, yet richer than 30 hours’ worth of advice from 30 experts. It will help you save an enormous amount of time and pull off a constructive cosmic joke.

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a doubleheader

4 “No way” 5 Aardvark’s prey 6 “A Streetcar

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You’ve been very resourceful in your efforts to push love to a new frontier, Scorpio. You’ve been an artist in the way you’ve reinvented passion and you’ve been a pioneer as you’ve dared to explore collaborations that require you to leave your comfort zone. Congratulations! Now I want to give you a tip that’ll help ensure you don’t undo all your good work. During the next three weeks, meditate often on these words, originally penned by poet Percy Bysshe Shelley: “Love withers under constraint: its very essence is liberty: it is compatible neither with obedience, jealousy, nor fear: it is there most pure, perfect, and unlimited, where its votaries live in confidence, equality, and unreserve.”

this mistake in the coming weeks, even if your potential collaborator is “perfectly imperfect.”

51 TV room

features

55 Only make-

believe

57 Poke holes in 59 “Peter Pan”

pirate

49 Take note of

61 Pitch ___-hitter

50 Exploits

62 Riddle-me-___

For answers, call 1-900-285-5656, $1.20 a minute; or, with a credit card, 1-800-814-5554.

Annual subscriptions are available for the best of Sunday crosswords from the last 50 years: 1-888-7-ACROSS. Online subscriptions: Today's puzzle and more than 2,000 past puzzles, nytimes.com/diversions ($19.95 a year).

Crosswords for young solvers: The Learning Network, nytimes.com/learning/xwords.

Behind Applebee's on Washington Rd. 706.651.1147 • yayabeads@aol.com Tuesday-Friday 10am-5:30pm Saturday 10am-4:30pm

73 M E T R O S P I R I T M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

74 M E T R O S P I R I T M A R 2 0 2 0 0 3

FREE AUTO CLASSIFIEDS

* Automobiles for sale by an individual may be placed in our FREE Auto Classifieds. The same ad will run continuously for six weeks or until the vehicle sells, whichever comes first. After two weeks, if you want to keep running the same ad, you must call The Metropolitan Spirit by 5 p.m. on Friday or we will assume you sold the vehicle and will delete the ad. All vehicles must indicate price. FREE Auto Classified ads are offered to individuals only and are not offered to commercial companies or dealers.

TO PLACE YOUR AD: Mail: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914-3809 Email: classified@metspirit.com Fax: 706-733-6663 Website: www.metspirit.com Visit Us At: 825 Russell Street, Augusta, GA MUST BE MAILED, FAXED OR EMAILED ON SPECIFIED FORM. ADS ARE NOT TAKEN BY PHONE.

GENERAL POLICIES: The Metropolitan Spirit reserves the right to reject, revise, alter, or reclassify any classified advertisement. Please check your ad for errors the first week the ad is published.

The Metropolitan Spirit is not responsible for any errors which appear after the first week the ad is inserted.

AD PLACEMENT FORM:

DEADLINES: In person - Monday at 3PM By mail, fax or email - Friday at 4PM

Name_________________________________________________________________________ Daytime Phone_________________________________________________________________ Address______________________________________________________________________ City______________________________________________State________Zip_____________ Ad Copy 20 words or less________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

GUARANTEED CLASSIFIEDS

* Items for sale by an individual may be placed in our Guaranteed Classifieds. The same ad will run continuously for ten weeks or until the item sells, whichever comes first. You must call by 5PM on Friday every two weeks to renew the ad or The Metropolitan Spirit will assume the item has been sold and will delete the ad. There is a $5 reinstatement fee if you forget to renew your ad. All items must indicate price. Guaranteed classified ads are offered to individuals only and are not offered to commercial companies. Guaranteed Classified ads do not include any automotive vehicles, real estate or pets.

RATES: FREE ADS Merchandise Under $250 $8 ADS Merchandise $251 to $500 $15 ADS Merchandise $501 to $1000 $20 ADS Merchandise over $1000 20 Words or Less - No Exceptions.

ADS MUST BE PREPAID DEADLINES: In person - Monday at 3PM By mail, fax or email - Friday at 4PM

TO PLACE YOUR AD: Mail: P.O. Box 3809, Augusta, GA 30914-3809 Email: classified@metspirit.com Fax: 706-733-6663 ADS ARE NOT TAKEN BY PHONE Website: www.metspirit.com Visit Us At: 825 Russell Street, Augusta, GA MUST BE MAILED, FAXED OR EMAILED ON SPECIFIED FORM. PAYMENT OPTIONS: (ADS MUST BE PREPAID) Cash-Money Order-Check

AD PLACEMENT FORM:

Name_______________________________________Daytime Phone_____________________ Address______________________________________________________________________ City______________________________________________State________Zip_____________ Payment ❑ Cash ❑ Check ❑ Money Order ❑ Visa ❑ MC Card No./Exp. Date_____________________________________________________________ Billing Address (if different from above)_____________________________________________ City______________________________________________State________Zip_____________ Ad Copy 20 words or less________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ GENERAL POLICIES: The Metropolitan Spirit reserves the right to reject, revise, alter, or reclassify any classified advertisement. Please check your ad for errors the first week the ad is published. The Metropolitan Spirit is not responsible for any errors which appear after the first week the ad is inserted.

M

y husband and I recently married and moved in together.

We’re having many disagreements over household chores and projects. I’m tidy and organized. He is ... not. I’ve owned a house for eight years — he’s always rented. I’m proud of my house, and feel it’s a reflection of myself. He does not seem to appreciate what goes into maintaining it. I do the lion’s share of housework, and I resent this. He says I do it because I want to. He thinks I’m a freak for getting up every Saturday to clean. The weekend, to him, is strictly for recreation. He says he’d help me if I clean during the week (I’m not convinced that’s true). I’m too tired after work. Plus, I like cleaning on Saturdays. He says I’m too regimented. I feel I’m simply organized, and not a procrastinator. Since we don’t plan on having children, I think we should be able to maintain a respectable household. Am I being too rigid?

—The Dirt Devil So, your married life looks like that scene from “2001” with the hairy ape creatures freaking out around the big, black monolith, except that your horrified husband is staring up at a mop like it’s some alien ar tifact. Before you tied the knot, did you notice a tendency in your thenfiance to tap dance around the house dusting the mini-blinds? To call in sick so he could stay home stenciling angels on the baseboards? To yell another woman’s name in his sleep?

“LAAUURA! ... LAURA ASHLEY!...”

More than likely, this is a man who was, at one time, eligible for federal disaster recovery matching funds to clean his apar tment. A man who was unlikely to experience a change of sheets unless somebody repossessed his bed.

A man whose definition of a “window treatment” was limited to “open” or “painted shut.”

A man who wouldn’t notice a dust ball unless it was so big he had to swerve his car to avoid it.

Men like this don’t clean the bathroom. They just wait until the crud level gets so high they can’t get to the toilet, then they move.

Now, maybe your hub’s life never got quite that sty-like. Still, if you expect him to whir into a Saturday morning cleaning frenzy just because you do — to throw on an apron and a do-rag, shine around the bowl with glee, then re-slipcover the entire house in chintz — you’ve been snif fing too much Pine-Sol. The guy isn’t

going to clean. Not now, not on Saturday, not during the week, not ever. That said, he might make cleaning-type motions, not because he actually cares whether the house is clean, but because he cares about pleasing his clean-freak wife.

There’s nothing wrong with being a cleanfreak — providing you don’t take a broom to the untidy, disorganized, former lifelong renter you married. Come on — you knew what you were get ting into. You saw how he lived. You heard what he said at the wedding: “I do,” not “I do windows, then I steam-clean the rugs.”

Maybe people with such dif ferent living styles would do bet ter at staying together if they lived apar t — nex t door to each other, or just down the block. Maybe you’ll never be happy until you have a man who shares your lust to dust and your jones to wipe down the wainscoting and wash behind the refrigerator. There’s a name for this man: “maid” or “cleaning person.” (His rates are a steal compared to a man called “divorce lawyer.”) Hiring him should eliminate not only the residues of daily living, but the inevitable accumulation of resentment from your Saturday morning temptation to wake your husband by shouting into a police bullhorn, “If you can’t do the time, don’t do the grime!”

Out of sheer desperation, before I met my boyfriend, I went on a few blind dates that ran the gamut from awk ward to nightmarish. I have two poor, lonely single friends who’ve independently described to me the kind of person they’re looking for, and they seem to be describing each other. I’d like to get them together, but without it being embarrassing or awful. Can you please give me a few tips on how to gracefully fix people up?

—Girl in the Meddle Going on a blind date is like waiting for death by lethal injection, except that they never bring you the lethal injection, just a glass of Chardonnay. It’s best if people being fixed up feel more like deer in gun sights — blissfully ignorant until the moment they become dinner.

Don’t speak a word about what you have in store. Just plan a night out with a big group of friends, invite both along, introduce them, and let them know what they have in common — apar t from being single, desperate, and pitied by you.

— © 2003, Amy Alkon

Got A Problem?

Write Amy Alkon

171 Pier Ave., Box 280 • Santa Monica, CA 90405 or e-mail AdviceAmy@aol.com

Classifieds Announcements

Mind, Body & Spirit

UNUSUAL FRIENDS PROJECT Seeks interviews with 20+ years friends of dif ferent race, ethnicity, age, sexual orientation, physical conditions, income or religion.

Nick King 800-551-3756 (03/20#8038)

POSITIVE IMAGE AWARENESS CENTER

SALON Great location!

Stylist Needed with license & clientele booth rent For more info call A.J. Home: 706-793-2561 Pager: 803-441-4403 (03/20#7986)

Business Opportunities For Free Consultation on clearing up your desk.

Please call 1-866-201-3516 (03/20#8017)

Equipment BUY FACTORY DIRECT WOLFF TANNING BEDS Payments From $25/month FREE Color Catolog Call Today 1-800-842-1310 www.np.etstan.com (03/27#7924)

Homes For Rent All New Stuff!

Remodeled 3 Br 2 1/2 Ba Garden Town Home Pool Access, Trash & Water, $700.00 Month & Deposit.

No Smoke, No Pet. Great West Augusta location.

706-495-8505 (03/20#8037)

Channeled Tarot Trance, Master Teacher Consultations, Group Master Teacher Channelings, Hypnotherapy, Regressions, Meditations, Pet Readings, Reiki Healing, Dream Analysis, Drawings of Your Guardian Angels, Spiritual Development Classes, Public Lectures, Meditations or Stress Relaxation for your Group or Company. Call for info: 259 Bobby Jones Expressway, Suite 3 Mar tinez, GA 30907 (Across from Wal-Mar t) TheAwarenessCtr@aol.com • www.spiritualwarriors.net

HYPNOSIS WORKS! BURY THOSE HABITS BEFORE THEY BURY YOU!

L❤ve & Light Healing Center 2477 Wrightsboro Rd.

733-4187 ❤ 733-8550 Full Body Massage!

Therapeutic tension relief, intense or tender touch, rela xing music, aromatherapy, by appointment only - $49.00/hr.

Call Joy - 706-771-9470 or John - 706-868-5598 (03/27#8043)

Religion Metropolitan Community Church of Our Redeemer A Christian Church reaching to all: including Gay, Lesbian, and Transgendered Christians.

Meeting at 311 Seventh Street, 11 am and 7 pm each Sunday. 722-6454 MCCAugusta@aol.com www.mccoor.com

Resort Rentals Amelia Island, Florida 2 Bedroom 2 bath direct ocean front condo in the hear t of historical Fernandina Beach, Florida. A convenient location without the crowds.

736-7070 -----------560-8980 (03/20#8042)

Place your Classified ad today!

Call 738-1142

C A R D R E A D I N G S

Mrs. Graham, Psychic Reader, Advises on all affairs of life, such as love, marriage, and business. She tells your past, present and future. Mrs. Graham does palm, tarot card, and crystal readings. She specializes in relationships and reuniting loved ones.

Call 738-1142 to place your Classified ad today!

Alt. Lifestyles

If You’re not Partying at Argos, The Tower of Argos or at The Shack ... You’re Not Partying

M A R

Club Argos & The Tower of Argos Leather Bar Open Daily at 6pm Mon Thur Fri Sat

Bhakti Yoga Yoga for Every Body (706) 556-8490 (706) 825-2113

Sofa and Loveseat - loose pillowback, beige with burgandy, green and blue accents.

Excellent condition. Sold as a set! $250.00.

706-836-3120 (05/15#8035) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Bedroom dresser with large mirror $50.00; Octagan shaped lamp table $15.00; Over tub shower bench $50.00, Call 706-736-7356 (05/15#8034) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Electric Lift Chair, Recliner.Blue by Invacare.

Paid $900.00 new, will sell for $500.00. Will hold a very large person. Call 790-0793.

(05/08#8026) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Three End Tables and Night Stand, very nice solid wood - All for $25.00 One large microwave and stereo receiver & speaker - All for $30.00 Call - 706-774-6400. (05/08#8027) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Boxwood Shrub, three years old, 18 inches tall $2.50 Call 706-863-3518 (05/08#8028) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Sears 3HP Power Reel Mower; 7 Blade Power Propelled. $150.00 Call 855-7162 (05/08#8029) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Books - Most $2.00 - $3.00 - Lots on Holocaust - Wiesel, Levi - Others. 706 7376219, Leave Message. (05/08#8030) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Childs wood play fort with lad, slide, sandbox.

Treated/GC, great for spring/summer. 706-8408635 LM. $75 OBO (05/01#8014) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Bathroom/Vanity mirror 3 foot x 29 inch with chrome slides for top and bot tom. $25 OBO, 706-840-8635 LM (05/01#8014) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Porsche Service Sign $50.00 service sign from dealership 11”X14” pic available.

PlatinumPorscheX@aol.com (04/17#8007) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Yearbooks: Mercer (The Cauldron) 1934 & 35; University of Richmond (The Web) 1948 & 49; John Marshall High 1945 Richmond, Virginia (Marsallite) $49 each 733-7735 (04/10#8001)

The Shack The CSRA’s Only All Night Place

Queer as Folk at 10 pm Karaoke - Pizza Party Argos Angels Caberet Argos Angels Caberet & Blackout Party at 12 Levi & Leather Only

(803) 441-0053 425 Carolina Springs Rd North Augusta, SC Wed

Coming Events Fri-3/28 Spectral Erosa’ Goth Night w/ DJ Tryskl Sat-3/29 The Great American Strip Off Argos welcomes Gay, Lesbian, Bi, BDSM, Swingers, TVTS & all openminded patrons

Call us at 481-8829 or email us at ClubArgos@aol.com 1923 Walton Way

THE COLISEUM

Premier Entertainment Complex & High Energy Dance Music Friday, 3/21 Natalie & Stephanie Ross

341 S. Belair Rd. Open from 9 a.m. til 9 p.m.

Call (706) 733-5851

Saturday, 3/22 Circuit Party w/ D.J. Patrick from Club Metro in Jacksonville, FL

Drink Specials: WED $7 Wet N' Wild SAT $2 Bud/Bud Light

Sun

2-4-1 Frozen Margaritas $2 Long Necks $1 Quervo Shots $5 Beer Bust Karaoke $1 Jello Shots

Come have fun where the party doesn’t end at 3:00 am!

Talk Line *****66¢ MINUTE***** VEGAS HOT TALK LIVE 1-ON-1 XXX FREE to BROWSE 1-702-216-3500 LOW AS .66¢/MIN. 1-900-420-0420 Ex t. 165 $2.95/min. 18+ (03/20#8036)

Fri & Sat. No Cover Before 10 p.m.

1632 Walton Way • Augusta, GA

Wanted

SPECIALS

Email: ColiseumAugusta@aol.com

CAN’T SELL IT?

1 Hr. Session By appt.

Gift Certificates Available

WWW.METSPIRIT.COM

Advanced Chiropractic

Travel

$39 Massage Special

1944 Walton Way, Suite H Augusta

706-772-4989 Miscellaneous For Sale Sony 5-disc CD carousel w/remote, works great, $75. 869-8931 (04/10#8000) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Magna Flip 400 Boys Bicycle Ages 9 - 13 $55/OBO 706-869-8888 (04/10#7999 –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Scott 6.75HP Lawnmower (John Deere) GC with bagger $60.00/OBO 706-869-8888 (04/10#7998) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– 36” Metal full glass ex terior French Door New $95.00 706-541-0656 (04/10#7995) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Mahogany End Tables, nice condition been in family for years $70 each. 706-444-8619 (03/27#7973) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Golf Clubs-Taylor Made irons super steel. Rifle shafts reg. flex 3-PW $199, 706-650-7487 (03/27#7972) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– EMACHINES 333cs Computer, keyboard, mouse, speakers, stand. $250 OBO! Call 7962769 after 5pm. (03/27#7971) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Nordic Track, Excellent condition. Comes with video tape and info. $65.00 Small exercise cycle use sit ting in chair, $25.00. 855-5521 (03/27#7970) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Outdoor Furniture, Chase, 3 cushion set te, and chair, sell for $50.00. Cocktail Table, four pedistal base in gold with heavy glass top sell for $75.00, Call 803-649-6658 (03/20#7963) –––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––––– Luxman Phono Preamp was $600 sell $90.

AudioSource SS Five surround sound processor was $200 sell $50.00. Call 706-210-4884.

(03/20#7961)

M E T R O S P I R I T

Open Mon-Fri 8pm-3am Sat 8pm-2:30am

Miscellaneous For Sale

www.metspirit.com

READINGS BY

MRS. GRAHAM SPECIAL READINGS WITH CARD

Employment

INTERNATIONALLY KNOWN PSYCHIC MEDIUM OFFERS TAROT WITH GUIDANCE FROM YOUR ANGELS AND LOVED ONES IN SPIRIT. OTHER SERVICES AVAILABLE:

75

706-733-2603

Make a tax deductible donation to the Habitat ReStore! All proceeds benefit Habitat for Humanity’s homebuilding program. Accepted donations include: furniture, windows, doors, light fixtures, plumbing fixtures, cabinets and working appliances. Free pick up available.

Call (706) 364-7637 or bring it to the ReStore at 1004 Walton Way, Augusta.

Wheels

Dead Bodies Wanted

We want your dead junk or scrap car bodies.

We tow away and for some we pay.

706/829-2676

OR

706/798-9060

2 0 2 0 0 3

76 M E T R O S P I R I T

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M A R

Calls cost $1.99 per min., Must be 18+.

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To respond to ads using a

2 0 0 3

STILL SEARCHING SWF, 47, 5’8”, 148lbs, Sagittarius, smoker, interests vary, seeks SWM, 37-48, for LTR. ☎342017 ATTENTION! Your military date is in Augusta. SF seeks military male, 29-45, with good sense of humor, good values/qualities. No abusers. Race open.

Children ok. Will answer all. ☎334255 NURSES SEEKS DOCTOR LOVE SWF, 24, blonde/brown, full-figured, attractive, financially independent, N/S, N/D, single mom of one, desires for special SWM, 24-33, honest, employed, N/S, N/D, for friendship, possible LTR. ☎323553 GOOD GIRL Attractive SWF, 38, 5’4”, 145lbs, blonde/hazel, N/S, Pisces, enjoys outdoors. Seeking tall SWM, 30-42. ☎864247 BE HONEST SF, 60, enjoys good conversations, going to Church, yard sales, music. Seeking SM, 5070, N/S, likes to go to Church. ☎965856 SINGLE MOM DWF, 40, 5’3”, brown/brown, full-figured, new to the area, seeks non-smoking SCM, 40+, for companionship, friendship, possibly more. ☎319109 A LOT TO OFFER SWPF, 39, 5’2”, 155lbs, loves, sports, dining out, cooking, movies, walks in the park, playing pool, travel, dining out. Seeking young man, with similar interests, for friendship and companionship. ☎321666 GET INTO THE GROOVE SWF, 43, 5’4”, 110lbs, slender, active, Capricorn, N/S, enjoys playing frisbee and nature walks. Seeking WM, 37-47, wide shoulders a+. ☎301123 GOD IS OUR SAVIOR SWF, 50, Sagittarius, N/S, loves Christian music, Christian tv, and reading the Bible.

Seeking BCM, 50-55, N/S, who sees things the same as I do. ☎299661 TO THE POINT DWF, 37, administrative assistant, Capricorn, N/S, seeks WM, 29-49, N/S, occasional drinker ok, honest, for dating. ☎299335 WORK OF ART Voluptuous SBF, 28, loves fishing, swimming, cooking. Looking for a man with the same passions. ☎747775 HOPELESS ROMANTIC SBF, 25, no children, very independent, Leo, N/S, seeks BM, 26-40, N/S, with whom to share movies, dancing, and quality time. ☎300467 MEET THE CRITERIA? SBF, 32, mother, smoker, seeks considerate male, 35-42, with capability to be understanding and sincere in a relationship. ☎288180 ENVELOPING EMBRACE Kind-hearted SBCF, 52, non-smoker, enjoys dining out, attending church. Seeking loving SBCM, 52-65, with similar interests. ☎287845 FALL IN LOVE AGAIN SF, 46, dark complexion, cosmetologist, seeks caring, sensitive, employed man, 46-56, for long walks, cuddling, and more. ☎284967 FIRST TIME AD! Employed SBF, 35, no children, wants to meet a laid-back, spontaneous man, 33-41, race unimportant, to get to know as a friend and maybe progress to more! ☎280007 OLD-FASHIONED GIRL SWF, 34, attractive, blonde, with good morals and values, Leo, N/S, enjoys nature, cooking, animals, movies, and home life. Desiring marriage-minded, family-oriented WM, 32-45. ☎261032 SEEKING DEDICATED PERSON SWF, late-30s, blonde/blue, is dedicated and looking for the same in a man, for friendship first, possibly more. ☎251283

COMPANIONSHIP DWF, 48, enjoys antiquing, travel, dining out, movies and more. Seeking DWM, 48-58, for loving, tender relationship. ☎732056 LEO SBF, 31, wants to share quality time with a man who loves movies, dining out, quiet times, for friendship. ☎202217 GIVE ME A JINGLE SBF, 46, is loving, kind and sweet, mature at every beat, can weave anything and loves to sing. Want to sing with her? ☎200842 A GOOD-HEARTED WOMAN Honest SWF, 5’4”, long dark brown/hazel, would like to meet a trustworthy SWM for a good, honest, open relationship. I smoker, so another smoker is preferred. Grovetown. ☎111411 TABLE FOR TWO SWF, 57, 5’4”, blond/green, easygoing, outgoing, enjoys cooking, fishing, reading, NASCAR. Seeking honest, respectful S/DWM, 57-65. ☎965851 BE MY FRIEND Attractive SWF, 29, 5’7”, 129lbs, brown/brown, N/S, no kids, never married, seeks SWM, 2037, in shape, friendship first, possible LTR. ☎945103 HONESTY IS KEY DWF, 38, mother of two/homemaker, loves Bon Jovi, dining out, quiet time at home.

Seeking honest, sincere SWM, 38-45. Could it be you? ☎910404 TRUE: One is a lonely number. DWF, no children, self-supporting, my physical appearance won’t embarrass you, retired and seeking a loving, truthful, reliable man, 50-75. ☎896701 SWEET AND SINGLE SBF, 30, Scorpio, N/S, student, enjoys quality time, movies, dining out, quiet times. Seeking friendship with SBM, 29-43, for possible LTR. ☎890152 TIRED OF BEING ALONE SWF, 49, 5’9”, 164lbs, Cancer, N/S, social drinker, mother of one, enjoys music, dining out, reading. Seeking SWM, 44-59, N/S, for LTR. ☎890570 SERIOUS ABOUT LIFE SBCF, 50, 165lbs, Scorpio, N/S, church-goer, mother of one, seeks outgoing, christian SBM, 50-60, N/S, with good heart, who is serious, for LTR. ☎885036 THE LONG RUN SBF, 43, single parent, health service technician, Capricorn, N/S, loves basketball.

Seeking BM, 37-47, N/S, for friendship, love, and beyond. ☎872160 BEACH BUM SBF, 31, with bachelor’s degree in communications, Taurus, N/S, loves dining out, movies, working out, and reading. Seeking man, 2636. ☎869451 ARE YOU SINCERE? SF, 28, blond/blue, enjoys the gym, time with family and friends. Looking for an honest guy, 26-35, who is not into games. ☎857530 A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN... inside and out. SBF, 26, 5’10’’, light complexion, enjoys movies, music, just having a good time. Seeking honest, sincere man for LTR. ☎861401 SINCERE BEAUTY Sophisticated SBCF, 23, 5’2”, 140lbs, interested in seeking educated, independent, employed SBM, 23-30, long walks, stimulating conversation, friendship, dating, more. ☎849311 GENUINE GEMINI Sweet SWF, 21, 6’, in medical field, enjoys Nascar, long walks. Seeking tall SWM, 25-35, with similar interests. Friendship first, possible LTR. ☎848654 I LIKE LIFE Single mom, 32, looking for a man with a vibrant personality and a love for living. ☎844138 I’LL WRITE YOU A POEM! SF, 25, 5’4’’, 150lbs, Virgo, enjoys reading, cooking, music, movies. Seeking a man who likes to try new things. ☎841437

OLD-FASHIONED VALUES Honest, relaxed, christian SBF, 56, Aries, N/S, enjoys cooking, dining out, quiet times at home. Seeking marriage-minded, financially secure SBM, 50-56, N/S, for LTR. ☎829149 WILLING TO MAKE TIME Busy, hard-working SBF, 31, nurse, mother of one, Taurus, N/S, enjoys traveling, walks, shopping. Seeking SBM, 31-39, N/S, for LTR. ☎836074 TAKE A CHANCE Laid-back SF, 30, enjoys dining in/out, going to the movies, church activities. Seeking SM, secure in himself to share those things. ☎767576 GOD LOVER Athletic, shy SBF, 33, 5’5”, 160lbs, Gemini, smoker, enjoys church, dining out, cooking, traveling, shopping, reading. Seeking outgoing man, 35-50, smoker, for LTR. ☎709843 NO GAMES PLEASE DWF, 33, 5’10”, full-figured, brown/hazel, selfemployed mother of three, seeks WM, 25-45, honest, faithful, devoted, for fun, friendship, LTR. ☎680330 TWO PIECES OF A PUZZLE Full-figured, very attractive, independent woman, 31, 5’2”, seeks someone special to spend time with. You: honest, fun-loving, varied interests. ☎685405 STRONG WILL SBF, 45, outgoing, attractive, youthful, enjoys writing, music, traveling. Seeking mature, strong-willed SBM, 35-48, for friendship. ☎965893 AN AUTUMN SPECIAL Hard-working WF, 38, 5’4”, 100lbs, blonde/brown, enjoys biking, watersports, cooking, and travel. Seeking WM, 35-50, for possible LTR. ☎965904 IN SEARCH OF MY SOULMATE He must be a tall (5’10”-6’4”), Christian man, 42-55, N/S, who is honest, faithful, devoted and lively. I am a SBPF, 5’6”, 150lbs, and looking for LTR. ☎641005 GOOD-HEARTED DWF, 61, 5’9”, honest, neat in appearance, with a good sense of humor. Seeking WM, 6070, who’s honest and caring. ☎574264 SENSE OF HUMOR REQUIRED SF, 33, 5’, full-figured, cocoa complexion, looking for friendship leading to relationship with SM, 25-40, who doesn’t play games. ☎579505 MAKE MY HEART LAUGH SBF, 22, 5’8”, 155lbs, part-time student, seeks sensual, kind man with a great heart, for movies, dining out, and open-minded conversation. ☎565120 ARE YOU THE ONE? College educated SWF, early 40s, 5’6”, 136lbs, extroverted, enjoys camping, country living, animals, movies, traveling. Seeking same in SWM, 40-50, similar interests. ☎965910

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KEEP IT SIMPLE SWM, 45, carpenter, enjoys travel, sports, fishing, dancing, music, playing cards.

Seeking SF who enjoys the same. ☎343229 TAKE ME AS I AM SWM, 31, 5’6”, medium build, brown/blue, Gemini, N/S, enjoys movies, and more.

Seeking SWF, 25-35, N/S, N/D, who enjoys good times, dating, for LTR. ☎341418 COMPATIBLE WOMAN WANTED DWM, 46, 5’9”, N/S, slim build, Capricorn, N/S, enjoys old cars, boating, classic rock, horror movies, mountains, beach. Seeking SWF, 38-46, N/S, for LTR. ☎341454 MAY GOD BE WITH US Christian with deep spiritual convictions.

DWM, 61 years young, 5’11”, 155lbs, full head of salt-and-pepper hair. Seeking S/DWCF, 4560, N/S, N/D, attractive, feminine, slender, good health, self-supporting. Must exercise four times weekly, do eight military push-ups and carry your own backpack five miles to keep up with me physically. Enjoys outdoor activities such as rafting, hiking, swimming and canoeing. I’m willing to participate in your interests also. Waiting to hear from you. ☎327909 SHOW ME YOUR SMILE SM, 44, enjoys kayaking, cooking, art, biking, exercise, outdoors. Looking for a female, 3450, who has the same kinds of interests. ☎858979

SAY YOU, SAY ME SWM, 25, 5’10”, 165lbs, medium build, brown/blue, Gemini, N/S, outgoing, energetic, seeks WF, 19-28, for friendship, possible LTR. ☎302503 YOU SUPPLY... the marshmallows. I’ll supply the bonfire, SWM, 36, truck driver, Aries, N/S, loves camping. Seeking a woman, 40-58. ☎316730 JUST YOUR AVERAGE GUY SWM, 37, N/S, likes motorcycles, fishing, camping, farming, relaxing weekends.

Seeking SWF, 25-40, to join me on life’s journey. ☎287476 IF YOU’RE READING THIS... why not give me a call? SWCM, 19, 6’, 185lbs, brown/blue, relaxed attitude, Capricorn, N/S, seeks WF, 19-25, N/S, for possible LTR. ☎938173 WOULD YOU BE MY GIRL? Light-skinned SBM, 20, 5’8”, short/brown, likes going to movies and more. Seeking single lady, 18-30, who’d like to be my girl. ☎275833 ENJOY LIFE WITH ME! SM, 52, wants to meet a fun-loving woman, 35-48, who is easy to get along with, likes sports, music, and more. ☎282853 MY DREAM GIRL SM, 29, 5’8’’, likes basketball. Looking for a female, 25-40, who enjoys going out and having a nice time! ☎274284 EARLY RETIREMENT SM, 63, works part time, deep sense of spiritual conviction, loves the Bible, fellowship, life.

Searching for similar woman, 45-56. ☎279329 LET’S FALL IN LOVE SM, 25, enjoys travel, movies, writing. Looking for a good woman, 25-42, who shares some of these interests. ☎281603

Stud Finder YOU HAVE 6 NEW MATCHES

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Mobile Dating. The easiest way to meet great people.

GUIDELINES: DATE MAKER ads are for adults 18 or over seeking monogamous relationships. To ensure your safety, carefully screen all responses. First meetings should occur in a public place. Abbreviations are permitted only to indicate gender preference, race, and religion. We suggest your ad contain a self-description, age range, lifestyle and avocations. Ads and voice messages containing explicit sexual language will not be accepted. This publication reserves the right to revise copy containing objectionable phrases; to reject in its sole discretion, any advertisement on account of its text. This publication assumes no responsibility for the content or reply to any DATE MAKER ad. The advertiser assumes complete liability for the content and all replies to any advertisement or recorded message and for any claims made against this publication and its agents as a result thereof. The advertiser agrees to indemnify and hold this publication, its employees and its agents harmless from all costs, expenses (including reasonable attorney fees), liabilities and damages resulting from or caused by the publication or recording placed by the advertiser or any reply to any such advertisement. By using DATE MAKER, the advertiser agrees not to leave his/her phone number, last name or address in his/her voice greeting. Not all boxes contain a voice greeting.

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M B D F H C LTR

Male Black Divorced Female Hispanic Christian Long-term Relationship

G W A S J P N/D N/S

Gay White Asian Single Jewish Professional Non-Drinker Non-smoker

Become a member of Augusta’s hottest new way to meet singles! Call today!

To become a member, call 1-888-223-7044 To listen and respond to ads, call 1-900-226-8908 To respond to ads using a LET’S DO LUNCH SBM, 28, Leo, homeowner, entrepreneur, attractive, seeks friendship with average, every day woman, 20-40. Have your heart talk to mine. ☎270867 GET IN TOUCH WITH ME SM, 21, 6’3’’, athletic build, student, loves movies, clubs, church. Seeking compassionate, down-to-earth, fun woman. ☎861556 OLD-FASHIONED GUY SHM, 34, 5’4”, 170lbs, Virgo, N/S, writes and loves country western music, helping the homeless, church. Seeking SHF, 32-36, N/S, with similar interests. ☎835306 SEEKING BBW SWM, 41, 6’, black/green, enjoys reading, movies, dining out, travel, dancing, quiet times. Seeking queen-size female, with a heart to match, for love and romance. ☎325398 SEEKING TRUE LOVE Handsome SBM, 39, compassionate, financially secure, seeks romantic, attractive, compassionate BF, 21-45, for romantic dinners, movies, walks along the beach, true friendship, LTR. You won’t be disappointed. ☎920361 SOCCER LOVER SHM, 21, 190lbs, loves to play soccer.

Seeking a woman with a good personality. ☎250070 TRUE FRIENDSHIP Handsome SBM, 40, with a compassionate nature, seeks a S/DBF, 43-50, with the same qualities for a passionate relationship. ☎200917 CHEF/PIANIST 6’, 190lbs, brown/blue, handsome, amateur psychologist, nice car, time off to travel, will send photo. Seeks pretty female companion, 26-39, no kids, light smoker/drinker okay. ☎882215 MY DEMANDS ARE SIMPLE SBM, 34, seeks a relationship with a faithful and honest BF, 28-39, smoker, for an honest relationship. ☎949160 IT TAKES TWO SBM, 33, Gemini, N/S, enjoys art, jazz, classical music, hiphop. Seeking SBF, 23-43, for shared interests in music, life, and happiness. ☎941377 LET’S MAKE A CONNECTION Laid-back, easygoing, employed SBM, 48, seeks similar SB/WF, 30-60, into music, dining out, spending quality time together. There’s no need to be lonely! ☎919786 MY DREAM LADY... is a spontaneous woman with a serious mind and who knows what she wants in life. SBM, 42, believes dreams can come true. ☎907741 LOOK ME UP Well-educated, professional SWM, 45, no children, never married, enjoys boating, fishing, camping and exploring life. Seeking SF, with similar interests, for fun and friendship. ☎898023 MATURE WOMAN WANTED Hardworking DM, 48, brown/green, looking for S/DF, who’s independent, spontaneous, openminded and mature, D/D-free, who knows what she wants in life, for friendship and maybe romance. ☎898762 FUN FOR ALL SWM, 50, seeks intelligent, aware SF, in shape, for indoor and outdoor fun. Looking for a friendship, that may lead to more. ☎902103 PHONE CALL AWAY Self-employed SWM, 40, Pisces, N/S, N/D, enjoys dining out, movies, cooking in, many activities. Seeking similar SWF, 28-45, N/S, to share good times with. ☎882776 IN NEED OF LOVE, SERIOUS SWM, 44, 6’, never married, blond/blue, Aries, smoker, seeks honest, romantic SWF, 25-38, enjoys sports, country walks, and more, for LTR, marriage. ☎889184 LET’S GET IN TOUCH! SWM, 20, Cancer, smoker, enjoys fishing, hunting, walking, playing games. Seeking older woman, 30-60, for possible relationship. ☎888111 THE PERFECT MATE DBM, 40, 6’, 195lbs, with 1 child, Capricorn, smoker, homeowner, loves gardening, cooking, and hunting. Seeking WF, 28-42, petite, to bedazzling. ☎873556 NOT JUST ANOTHER... stud. DBM, 33, with 3 children, Libra, N/S, seeks a lucky lady, 25-45, N/S, with whom to share quality time. ☎868350

KNOCK-KNOCK, WHO’S THERE? Call me and find out. SWM, 34, Cancer, N/S, loves to tell jokes. Seeking WF, 25-39, N/S, for friendship and relationships. ☎775609 DON’T MISS THIS! SBM, 45, 5’10’’, 230lbs, interested in sports, jazz, movies, dining out. Would like to meet a woman with the same interests. ☎862898 LET’S HOOK UP 34-year-old SBM, 5’9”, 180lbs, Aquarius, nurse, bald head, new to area, open-minded, fun-loving, hopeless romantic. Seeking woman who loves to be romanced. ☎849401 POET SEEKS MUSE SBM, 45, loves all sports, board games, fishing, travel. Seeking a woman to share movies, dining and romance with. ☎843396 DARE TO DREAM Outgoing SBM, 21, 5’9”, 165lbs, Capricorn, N/S, loves going out, outdoors, children.

Seeking SWF, 20-26, N/S, for possible family. ☎835444 EARLY XMAS GIFT Very romantic SBM, 31, 6’1”, 255lbs, Scorpio, N/S, enjoys church, dining out, cooking.

Seeking stable SBF, 25-35, for friendship first, leading to something long-term. ☎837718

I’D LOVE TO MEET! SM, 47, likes dining out, having fun, malls, movies, television. Looking for sincere male for possible relationship. ☎861252 NICE PERSONALITY A MUST SM, 29, 5’7’’, moustache and goatee, seeks down-to-earth, nice, masculine, real man, 2730, for friends, possible LTR. ☎280741 YOU CAN MAKE MY DAY Male, 60, Cancer, N/S, seeks a WM, 49-65, N/S, for casual relationship. Why not call me? ☎927707 OUT SPOKEN SWM, 32, 5’11”, 145lbs, enjoys camping, fishing, Nascar. Seeking laid-back WM, 23-35, for LTR. ☎560095 LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIP Senior SWM seeks sincere, honest SWM, 2545, to share home and lifestyle. Many interests including gardening, cooking, arts and crafts, travel, camping. ☎294303 ENJOYS ALL THAT LIFE HAS GWM, 40, shaved head, goatee, Pisces, smoker, seeks very special, attractive, strong, fun-loving GBM, 30-50, for dating, possible LTR. ☎257126 NASCAR FAN SWM, 38, 6’1”, 190lbs, brown/green, is goodlooking and masculine. Seeking a man who is also masculine and enjoys going for drinks and RVing. ☎250111 YOU NEVER KNOW Fun-loving, easygoing GWM, 51, 5’11”, 198lbs, enjoys cooking, movies, fishing, walking. Seeking interesting GWM, 18-33, who’s full of life, for casual relationship, possibly more. ☎676662 100% LAID-BACK SBM, 35, 5’11”, brown skin, dark brown eyes, Virgo, smoker, bookworm, loves tv. Seeking masculine, spontaneous BM, 30-45, smoker. ☎958192 WHAT’S HAPPENING? SWM, 30, 5’7”, 200lbs, brown/blue, Aries, N/S, seeks BM, 19-35, N/S, outgoing, for friendship first, possible LTR. ☎958402 DOESN’T PLAY GAMES Unattached GBM, 41, interested in meeting open-minded, fun-loving, honest, truthful, compassionate and loyal GM for LTR. ☎920995 DARK CHOCOLATE SBM, 23, with a dark complexion, wants to go out and have good times with a great guy. ☎917508 CALL ME... you will not be disappointed. SM, 35, Indian, 5’9”, seeks the same. Let’s get together. ☎916175

How do you

COOL WORLD SBM, 22, loves bowling, football, chess. In search of a man who loves the same things. ☎907631 BE YOURSELF Honest, caring SM, 47, 5’10”, 220lbs, seeks outgoing, ambitious, down-to-earth man, to share friendship, fun times and maybe more. ☎895468 LET’S JUST CUDDLE Lonely GWM, 33, Aries, smoker, enjoys quiet nights, relaxing, being with somebody.

Seeking GWM, 20-30, for possible LTR. ☎887748 YOU WON’T BE SORRY Real, honest, and sweet GBM, 18, 5’11”, darkskinned, Gemini, N/S, seeks friendly GBM, 18-35, not into games. I’m ready for a commitment. ☎831448 NEW TO THIS BiWM, 49, 5’10”, thick, black/blue, Libra, N/S, seeks friendly, fun-loving GWM, 35-65, N/S, for possible LTR. ☎839145 IT’S YOUR CALL GWM, young 46, 5’11”, 200lbs, brown/brown, masculine, outgoing, enjoys travel, dining out, movies, shopping, Nascar. Would like to meet honest, passionate GM, with similar interests, for dating, possible LTR. Serious inquiries only. ☎792384 LOOKING FOR LOVE GWM, 41, 5’8’, 140lbs, Pisces, enjoys fishing, television, wood working, gardening, arts, crafts. Seeking GWM, 25-45, for friendship first, possible LTR. ☎705204 I KNOW WHERE IT’S AT SBM, 25, practical yet fun, outgoing, Aquarius, smoker, seeks a masculine, alluring, wellrounded BM, 23-45, smoker, with his priorities in order. ☎695448 BEYOND SWM, 32, 5’11”, 155lbs, light hair, looking for good time with GM, 18-45, ☎966003

“EVERYONE’S BEST FRIEND” GWF, 26, 5’6”, medium build, likes watching movies, bowling, hanging out, malls, phone conversations. Seeking fun-loving, seriousminded GWF, 22-35, medium build, for friendship and possibly more. ☎335046

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WELL-ROUNDED GWPF, 24, 4’11”, brown/brown, loves animals, movies, dancing, travel, dining out, sports, conversation. Seeking GF, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. ☎329740 BEAUTIFUL AND FEMININE GWF, 32, 5’7”, 135lbs, enjoys reading, movies, dining out, travel, sports, music, movies. Seeking GWF, 25-39, with similar interests, for friendship, possible LTR. ☎329063 A REFRESHING CHANGE SWF, 30, Libra, smoker, is hoping to find it in a woman, 25-45. Will show a lot of a affection. ☎307177 CHURCH-GOER SBF, 38, Virgo, N/S, heavy-duty equipment operator, seeks BF, 30-45. Enjoys motorcycle riding, playing bass guitar. ☎799776 I’M LOOKING 4 U Easygoing, loyal SBF, 31, 5’3”, 155lbs, security officer, people person, fun-loving, nice, caring, honest, enjoys bowling, movies, cuddling at home. Seeking trustworthy, outgoing SBF, 26-35, for friendship, maybe LTR. ☎965835 AVID READER Quiet SF, 24, part-time student, into all types of music, especially oldies, pets, writing poetry. Seeking a female, 24-40, with same interests. ☎283861 SPECIAL FRIENDSHIP Attractive, feminine SWF, 41, 5’4”, seeks a very open-minded WF, 35-48, for fun and exciting times. ☎775074 YOUNG AT HEART Active GWF, 62, 5’5”, 122lbs, brown hair, enjoys camping, fishing, meeting new people, dining out, short trips. Seeking plus-sized GWF, 45-65, for friendship first. No games. ☎292839 BUILDING A FUTURE Hard-working, mechanically inclined SBF, 46, loves to build and rebuild. Seeing female who prefers the home life and knows what she wants from life. ☎120569 LOOKING FOR LOVE SBF, 32, 140lbs, 5’8”, down-to-earth, likes clubs, movies, and quiet times. Looking for a female, 30-35, with the same interests. If you’re the one, call me. Aiken, South Carolina. ☎113533 LIKE MALLS & MOVIES? Feminine BiBF, 25, 5’4”, 145lbs, short hair, Sagittarius, smoker, loves movies and tv.

Seeking another feminine woman, 18-30, with whom to hang out and chat. ☎958642

OUTGOING FUN WF, 28...

5’3”, medium build, loves movies, putt-putt golf, and bowling. Seeking WF, 25-40, medium build, for fun and friendship. Hope to hear from you soon. ☎958847 MAN FOR ALL SEASONS GBF, 31, 5’6”, brown/brown, Cancer, smoker, enjoys kids, bowling. Seeking open-minded, passionate, understanding GBF, 23-45, for LTR. ☎941850 NO INTRO NEEDED SWF, 39, 5’7”, 145lbs, homeowner, easygoing, selfless, Taurus, smoker, loves movies and bowling. Seeking WF, 35-49, with comparable interests. ☎935299 I WON’T LET YOU DOWN Single GBF, 32, mother, non-smoker, looking to become acquainted with a laid-back, sensual GBF, who enjoys quiet times, movies.

Interested? ☎910581 FRIENDSHIP SBF, 38, 5’7”, slim, fit, seeks SF, for friendship and fun. Must be outgoing, love to wine and dine, travel, movies and theater. ☎878217 CHOCOLATE SEEKS CREAM SF, 39, new to the area, down-to-earth, loves laughing, sight-seeing. Seeking WF, 30-45, to show me a great time! ☎861222 SOMEONE TO LOVE GBF, 21, with brown complexion, seeks femme GBF, 21-30, with no baggage, and her priorities straight. ☎843696 VERY PRETTY SBF...

28, two children, confident, feminine, seeks female, 20-35, with the same qualities, who is not into head games. ☎785531 A GOOD HEART SF, 39, goes to church, works for a living, likes having fun, going on trips. Seeking a similar female, 37-49. ☎780112 JOIN ME GBF, 32, nurse, part-time student, Capricorn, N/S, enjoys bowling, movies, shopping, traveling. Seeking casual relationship with woman, 25-45. ☎711628 ZEST FOR LIFE Articulate, adventurous WF, 32, 5’8”, brown/brown, enjoys animals, running, movies and dining. Looking for WF, 25-40, for friendship. ☎965827 GIVE ME A RING Cute SBF, 30-something, seeks attractive SF, 25-45, for friendship, maybe more. No games. ☎965825 WASTE NO TIME GBF, 36, enjoys dining out, cooking, dining out. Seeking attractive, open-minded, fun, nice GF, 25-45, for friendship and possibly more. ☎965823 © 2002 TPI GROUP

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BY

THE

er003@comcast.net (1044/0424) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1995 FORD CROWN Victoria LX, dark green, all power options, extra clean, excellent condition, Michelins, 69K, $5500, 706-733-8971 (982/0327) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1996 CHEVROLET CAMERO, 41K, factory purple, 5spd, 6 cyl, AC, FM, cass, immaculate, one owner, $6500 OBO, 706868-0090 (975/0327) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1996 HONDA ACCORD EX, champagne, V6, leather, auto, CD, alloys, sunroof, keyless entry, maintenance records, garaged, excellent condition, $9500, 706-733-7297 (957/0320) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1996 PONTIAC GRAND Prix GTP, white, rear spoiler, tint windows, 3.4L, V6 high output, 4spd auto w/OD, well cared for, 129K, $6500, Jim 706-721-3365 days or 706547-7878 eve. (1039/0424) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1996 TOYOTA COROLLA DX, gold, 79K, AC, am/fm, cassette, $3500, call 706-2315430 or 706-267-6350 (932/0424) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1997 ACURA 3.2TL, Premium, loaded, great ride, new tires, remote keyless entry, power locks & windows, AC, climate control system, Bose radio/cassette/CD, remote sunroof, $10,900, 803279-8326 (993/0403) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1997 MITSUBISHI ECLIPSE GS, 116K, loaded, AC, power, multi CD player, 5spd, manual sunroof, extras, $7000, 706231-7691 (978/0327)

METROPOLITAN

–––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1997 TOYOTA COROLLA, 86K, 5spd, AC, am/fm, CD, great student car, $5500 OBO, 706-790-4396 or 706-3736073 (1031/0417) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1998 MITSUBISHI ECLIPSE GS, white, 2dr, 5spd, 72K, $7200, 803-642-8323 (1035/0417) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1999 FORD MUSTANG, red, 36K, #536, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (999) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1999 LINCOLN TOWN Car, executive series, call for details, won’t last long, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (996) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2000 HONDA ACCORD EX, green/tan leather, auto, fully loaded, rear spoiler, 44/5K, one owner (lady), $14,500, 706-650-8644 (1020/0410) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2000 HONDA S-2000, silver/red, convertible, 39K, every available option, garage kept, fast, great brakes, precision shifting, $21,000, 803643-0846 (1046/0424) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2000 NISSAN MAXIMA, like new, $15,900, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (1002) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2000 TOYOTA CELICA GT, white, auto, 32K, loaded, w/extras, excellent condition, 37 mpg, $14,800, 803-6131559 (1024/0410) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2001 CHRYSLER PT Cruiser Limited, beautiful parrot blue, auto, CD, air, all power and options, 30K, $14,995, 803279-3385 (1037/0417) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2001 HONDA EX, low miles,

warranty, auto, 6-CD changer & tape, $18,500 negotiable, 803-278-0645 (1027/0410) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2002 HYUNDIA ELANTRA, power windows, great interior/exterior, runs great, asking only $12,000 706-650-2766 (1006/0403) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1999-01 MAZDA MILLENIA’S, starting $10,988, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-2020002 (998) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1999-02 MAZDA 626’S, starting $9800, must see, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (1003)

Motorcycles 1998 HARLEY DYNA Super glide, laser red, 5400 miles, sissy bar, highway pegs, excellent condition, $11,000 OBO after 6 pm, 803-2799494(981/0327) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2000 HONDA XR650R, enduro, off road only, XC, many power enhancing extras, priced to sell or will consider trade, 706-309-9526 after 6 pm (458/0320) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2001 BUELL BLAST, 246 miles, garage kept, $3500, 481-9336 ask for Sandy (991/0403) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2001 HARLEY DAVIDSON Road King Classic, teal blue w/white, great condition, many extras, $17,300, 706-8547941 (1021/0410) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2002 HONDA SHADOW 1100, low miles, black with extra chrome, new condition, $6800, 706-560-2025 or 706-

SPIRIT

627-3070 (1036/0417)

Other 1987 EAGLE SPEED Boat, 60 mph, closed bow, Johnson 140HP outboard, $2500 OBO or trade for 4 wheeler, 803279-2669 (934/0313) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1989 RENKEN CABIN Cruiser, 26ft, sleeps six if you’re friendly, four otherwise, full galley, head and shower, 75 hours on 460 Cobra/outdrive, outstanding condition, $22,500, 706-733-8971 (984/0327) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1998 COLEMAN POPUP, king beds, refrig, AC, awning, dinette, toilet, hot water, outside shower, brakes, 16’7” closed, 27’ open, $3500 firm, 706-790-3425 (989/0403)

SUVs 1986 FORD BRONCO Eddie Bauer Edition, call details & price, 706-306-3443 (1022/0410) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1993 CHEVY BLAZER, S-10 Tahoe, 2dr, 5spd, 130K, good condition inside and out, runs good, new brakes, $2500, 706-364-9193 (1047/0424) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1993 CHEVY SUBURBAN, Silverado, white/blue, auto, 4X4, 8 seats, 186K, remanufactured engine, rebuilt transmission, good condition, $5500 OBO, 803-641-1664 (1018/0410) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1994 CHEVROLET SILVERADO, extended cab, step side, 4X4, loaded, excellent condi-

CHECK US OUT ONLINE WWW.METSPIRIT.COM

Trucks 1987 TOYOTA PICKUP, 4 cyl, runs well, needs body work,

$15,900, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (995)

1977 VW VAN, 34.5K original miles, new am/fm/cd, great interior condition, needs a groovy home, $4500, 706863-8118 (1025/0410) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1990 CHEVY ASTRO, 7 seater, all window, 110K, loaded, excellent condition, $3450, 706-541-0656 (888/0417) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1992 TOYOTA PREVIA LE, dual sunroof, AC, PS, Am, Fm stereo, alloy wheels, dealer serviced, $4895, 706-6502196 (955/0320) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1993 FORD AEROSTAR, black, power windows & locks, 111K, hitch, air, tape deck, $2500 OBO, 706-731-0033 or 706-731-9689 (1038/0417) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1994 DODGE GRAND Caravan SE, dark green, power everything, rear & front AC, Quad seating, 175K, $3000, 706-869-1920 (1001/0403) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1997 FORD WINDSTAR GL, dark red, auto, 7 passenger, 3.8 V6, AC, tilt, power windows, 146K, $3700 OBO, 706-860-5001 (774/0410) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1998 TOYOTA SIENNA XLE, leather, sunroof, excellent condition, 86K, payoff $15,800, take $13,800, 706-796-4097 or 706-860-2629 (1029/0417)

SAVE

BIG WITH 0%

AT GERALD JONES SUBARU A HOT New 2003 Subaru Baja only

$20,995 with 0% financing!

2003 WRX, High Performance Sports Sedan

$21,995 with 0% financing! only

2003 Subaru Outback, only

$21,495 with 0% financing!

GERALD JONES

1801 Gordon Highway

738-2561

2 0 2 0 0 3

Come see the all new Subarus Now at Gerald Jones Subaru 1801 Gordon Highway ...

Where you get a great deal and a great deal more.

3233 WASHINGTON ROAD AUGUSTA, GA • 888-694-5555 2001 PONTIAC GRAND AM STK#7320A

$10,987 2001 CHEVY LUMINA STK#7315A

FORD RANGER

$13,988

MUST SEE!

$330/mo.

WON’T LAST!

Low Miles • Local Trade • Factory Warranty

Loaded To The Hilt!

LINCOLN TOWN CAR

Executive Series Call for details, won’t last long!

1999

2001

1999

$10,837 2001 HYUNDAI ACCENT STK#9093B

$6,998 1999 ISUZU RODEO STK#376719

$11,982 2002 DODGE INTREPID SE STK#7319A

$13,428 AIKEN-AUGUSTA HIGHWAY N. AUGUSTA, SC • 888-668-9985 2001 MAZDA PROTEGE AUTO • A/C • STK#P5889

$8,995

2002 CHRYSLER PT CRUISER

FORD MUSTANG

JEEP WRANGLER

$250/mo.

WOW!

Sport Package 4x4 • Auto • Air • Low Miles

1997

Very Sharp! Red Mustang 36K • #536

GMC SIERRA 1500 SL

$15,900

WON’T LAST!

2000

1999

ANDY JONES MAZDA ISUZU

(803) 202-0002

www.andyjonesmazda.com Open Monday-Friday 9am-8pm, Saturday 9am-7pm At the top of the rise on the Aiken-Augusta Highway in North Augusta

LIKE NEW • STK#P5936

$13,995

2002 TOYOTA HIGHLANDER CERTIFIED • 100K MILE WARRANTY • STK#CP5941

$22,995

Stepside • 4.3 Ltr V-6

M E T R O

M A R

C O M E A N D S E E T H E O N E S T H AT C A N G E T Y O U D O N E !

ISUZU TROOPER

79

S P I R I T

BAJA

Vans

WRX

$400 or make offer, 706-7988141 (1030/0417) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1993 CHEVROLET PICK Up 1500, step side, 5spd, $5500, 706-798-3553 (954/0320) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1993 MITSUBISHI MIGHTY Max, blue, great hunting truck, AC, CD, $2500, 706-4954243 (986/0403) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1994 CHEVROLET S-10, red, 4.3liter vortez engine, auto, air, extended cab, new tires, mags, great condition, $3400, 706-556-9704 (1032/0417) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1995 DODGE DAKOTA Extended cab, 2WD, auto, call for further details after 6 pm, 706-729-1677 (979/0327) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1995 GMC SIERRA, white/burgundy, x-cab, 4X4, 65k, loaded, must sell $11,000, 706-863-1543 (1007/0403) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1998 MAZDA B2500, 4cyl, 4500 miles, AC, auto w/overdrive, one owner, $2300 firm, 706-868-1988 (1040/0424) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1998 TOYOTA TACOMA, std cab, 4WD, 115K, 5spd, very good condition, 803-637-3510 (1045/0424) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2000 FORD F150, Harley Davidson extended cab, 13K, black with black Harley leather, like new, extended warranty, $23,000, 706-836-6703 (1034/0417) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2000 GMC SIERRA, step side, 1500 SC, 4.3liter, V-6,

OUTBACK

tion, $8500, 803-279-1651 (953/0320) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1994 ISUZU TROOPER, Limited edition, loaded, leather, sunroof, CD, full towing package, high mileage, highway miles, $3950, 803-510-3116 (1033/0417) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1997 JEEP CHEROKEE, air, PL, PW, CD & tape deck, 50K, very good condition, $13,500, 706-860-6471 (1028/0417) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1997 JEEP WRANGLER, sport package, 4X4, auto, air, low miles, $250/mo, WAC, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-2020002 (997) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1999 ISUZU TROOPER, 4X4, loaded to the hilt, $13,988, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-2020002 (994) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 2000 JEEP CHEROKEE Limited, 6 cyl, 4X4, leather, all power, 69K road miles, perfect condition, $13,500, 706-7338971 (983/0327) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1998-99 FORD EXPEDITION’S, great selection, starting $16,900, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (1000) –––––––––––––––––––––––––– 1998-2001 ISUZU RODEO’S, loaded, clean, must see, starting $12,500, Andy Jones Mazda, 803-202-0002 (1001) ––––––––––––––––––––––––––

2001 TOYOTA CELICA GTS CERTIFIED • 100K MILE WARRANTY • #P5896A

$16,995

2002 CHEVY TAHOE LOADED • STK#2882A

$28,995