JENNY IS WRIGHT
15 in 5 Because I love a list. Especially a random list. 1. It’s a presidential election year. I hate presidential election years, because they seem to bring out all of the loud idiots. I don’t just mean the voters. There seem to be an especially large number of idiots wanting to get involved this year. 2. Valentine’s Day just came and went, as it usually does. I’m not sure The Man and I have celebrated a single V Day in our 14 years together. That isn’t a complaint. 3. I take that back. This year, we drank the same wine we had the night he proposed to me. That’s as romantic as it gets. That isn’t a complaint, either. 4. What’s up with getting zits as an adult? I knew I’d get gray hair and wrinkles, but pimples? Notsomuch. Do they still sell Stridex? 5. If someone has audible, accidental gas, I will laugh every time. It’s not likely that I will ever outgrow that. Immature? Probably. Hilarious? Absolutely. 6. A fifth grader told The Boy about sex. He was on the bus and was therefore captive audience. I heard him telling The Girl that sex is when two grown-ups take off their clothes, get in bed and kiss each other’s private parts. I’m gonna have to table that one for now. 7. Speaking of the bus, my kids have the nicest, most capable bus driver out there. She drops them off at our driveway each day. Once when The Boy missed the bus, she offered to go back to school and get him. 8. I’m sorry for all of the teachers who get paid less because of the furlough days. I really am. I also really enjoyed a four-day weekend at the lake with my kids. 9. While we were at the lake, I read “The Hunger Games.” It’s impossible to read the first without reading the second. We don’t have wi-fi at our lake house, so when I needed to download “Chasing Fire” to my Kindle, The Kids and I went to Lincolnton in search of free wireless. The first place I thought of was Hardee’s. The only wireless my phone was picking up was password protected. Glancing over at the Kindle, the tiniest sliver of wi-fi was being detected. I dared not move the device, so I slowly touched the screen, purchasing the book I wanted. Success! 10. When I walked in to Hardee’s, I’d swear you could hear a french fry drop. Lincolnton is a small town, and although everyone is more than friendly, I always feel a little funny walking into the local businesses. They all know each other, and they know they don’t know me. 11. It rained some, but when it was dry, The Kids were outside in short sleeves. They even took their shoes off and played in the mud. That’s my kind of winter. 12. I know that many of you hoped for more chilly weather. I hope you’ve been able to come to terms with the beautiful days we’ve had over the past couple of months. If you want snow, go somewhere that has it. Otherwise, please quit complaining about sunshine. We live in Georgia. 13. This weather has given us some of the most beautiful skies. Between the clouds on a sunshiney day, the sunsets at dusk, and the show the moon puts on, it’s been one hell of a “winter.” 14. I’m not sure we’re out of the woods for frigid weather or even snow. Remember Easter a few years ago when we had the cold snap? No one knew what the heck to wear to church that day. Carefully chosen Easter frocks were abandoned for winter coats and sweaters. It could still happen, ye who complain. 15. I used to be one of those people who hated having the windows down in the car if we were going any faster than about 40 miles per hour. The noise was unbearable. On the way back from the lake, I realized something: rolling the windows down while traveling at a high rate of speed is loud. Just loud enough to drown out the sound of whining, bickering children. They are really excited to go back to school tomorrow.
JENNYWRIGHT lives in Summerville with her husband, who she calls The Man, and two kids, who she affectionately calls The Boy and The Girl. She enjoys taking photos, cooking and playing tennis.
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METRO SPIRIT 02.23.12
V. 23 | NO. 08