Urban Image Magazine March April Issue by taneisa tyson

MARCH/APRIL 2011

MAGAZINE

CONTENTS Pg.4 Lucy... Conversation with a Canadian Cutie Pg.10 C Beauty Art Column Pg. 14 Da Beat Block Pg.16 Urban Fashion Pg.20 Skin Care

Pg.22 What up Dawg? Doggie care with Mimi Brooks Pg. 24 The story behind Black and Noble

Pg.28 Supernova Frank Mathews… Writing about life with two degrees of separation Pg38 Cyber Bullying Pg.40 Ask Emiaj Pg.42 The responsibility of your “Sista” Pg.44 Battle of the Sexes~Relationships and children Pg.50 Sex and Relationships Pg.62 Dear Kitty

Pg. 65 Aw Hell Naw~Urban Comedy

Lucy… CONVERSATION WITH A CANADIAN CUTIE By Daddy Rich

Daddy Rich: So what's up Lucy, what's your full name-your model name Lucy: It's just Lucy Daddy Rich: Ok how old are you Lucy: I'm 25 Daddy Rich: So, how long you been modeling? Lucy: I've been modeling since 17 around on and oďŹ&#x20AC;, kind of on and oďŹ&#x20AC;. Daddy Rich: I no ced that you have kind of a accent, I know that you live in Canada right, Lucy: Yes Daddy Rich: You was born and raised? Lucy: No I wasn't born here. I am African, from Ghana Daddy Rich: I knew I heard an accent. That's what's up! What's it like over there in Ghana? Lucy: It's nice. It's really nice. I didn't really get to experience a lot because I came over when i was 9, and and then I came to Montreal which is in Canada. So I've been in Montreal for over 16 years now trying to do the best, trying to get something done for my life. Daddy Rich: So how do you like it in up there in Canada? Lucy: It's okay. For me it's kind of quiet. I'm the type of person--I like to travel even thought I haven't done much traveling in my life, but I would love to travel eventually. It's okay. It' s a li le quiet. There's not too much going on down here, but so far so good Daddy Rich: So have you been doing a lot of shows with your modeling career? Lucy: I have done a couple of things, mainly photo shoots. I have done a couple of parts, like hos ng. I've hosted a couple of par es. I've been featured in a couple of par es as well--a couple of videos here and there, not much. I try to make some me for that. Daddy Rich: Cool! So do you have any big projects coming up soon? Lucy: Right now I work mainly with CJ Caesar. He is mainly my main manager now. He is trying to get me out there. Hopefully I will have bigger things to do in the near future. I am looking forward to that. Daddy Rich: I am glad to have the opportunity to put you in the pages of Urban Image Magazine! Lucy: Yes, I am very fortunate. I feel very happy about it. I am very fortunate. I am very thankful, and I

hope many good things come from all of this. So I will wait and see how all it goes. Daddy Rich: So are you single, or do you have me just to focus on your career? Lucy: I'm single, yes. I do have a child. I have a boy, so I am trying my best to kind of get his-- get the future bright for him, just like every single mother--you know, you try to do the best for your child and make sure that everything is great for the both of us. Daddy Rich: So you are pre y much single huh? Lucy: Yes. Daddy Rich: That's cool for all the male readers looking at your pictures in this magazine and everything. They are probably wondering what type of man do you like--what do you look for in a man if you were looking for a mate. Lucy: I'm really not picky. I'm not a picky person. Looks are important, but for me it's not too important because looks come with the personality as well and respect. I like a man to have something going for him and to also have a lot of conďŹ dence. You don't have do be the most gorgeous man, but as long as you have a lot to oďŹ&#x20AC;er. That is what is going to catch my a en on and really draw me in. I'm really down to earth. I don't really mind. Daddy Rich: What type of woman are you for your man? Lucy: I'm a good woman. That's the one thing I go a get out there. The type that's really commi ed and loyal. If I have a man, I'm gonna be there for him no ma er what the situa on is-- I will be there from day one un l the end. I am very loyal. I am going to s ck with him no ma er what happens. I am a good girl, but I am not afraid to experience things and make my man happy, so I am always down for whatever he wants and whatever he likes, just to make sure that he is good, you know, to make sure he is taken care of. Daddy Rich: Do you like to go out to clubs and party a lot? Lucy: Yes Daddy Rich: What are some of your favorite clubs? Lucy: Down here I've been to dance halls. I love dance all music. I love dance hall music, I love rap. I love hip hop. When I go partying mainly, I like to wine and dine. Daddy Rich: What's your favorite drink. 6

Lucy: I love Cognac, I like to drink it raw--with ice or Hennessy straight. Daddy Rich: My favorite is Remy Mar n. Lucy: Yes. If there isn't any Cognac or Hennessy, then I go with Remy Mar n-either of those three. Daddy Rich: Before we wrap this interview up, is there anything else? Lucy: Miss Lucy is the type of girl--I am very good. I will learn to get along with you fine. I will be good with you. I am cool with you. I love to have fun. I love music. At the same me I am very serious when it comes to ge ng something done I get it done. So once I have it done it's me to get loose and party and celebrate and enjoy myself. Daddy Rich: What are your sizes? Lucy: Cup wise--I am about a D cup 36D, and waist--I do have a have a pre y ny waist. Daddy Rich: I thought all models knew their size, you know what I mean. Lucy: I am really bad because my body changes a lot. I get thick and thin and then I get thicker on and off. I'm a size 7 right now. It's kinda complicated. I have the hips, but I have a small waist--about size 7, 36 D in a cup in the upper area.. Daddy Rich: That's what up. Thank you for your me. I enjoyed interviewing you and I am pre y sure all of the fellas are gonna enjoy looking at you in the spread of our magazine. Lucy: I hope so. I am sure they are and I hope they support as well so there can be many more to come. I can have a lot of different looks. I am not boring. I tend to look different at all mes It's kind of entertaining. Transcribed by: Cheryl Francis of Black Diamonds Book Reviews

CBeauty Art Column

By Christopher Brown

Urban Image Magazine would like to welcome all our readers to another highly celebrated issue of Urban Image Magazine. As you know my name is Christopher Brown, Art Columnist for UIM and this month I am here to introduce you to Stephon J. Davis Director & Owner of Supreme Productions and Educo Film. These two companies create exciting video and films ranging from commercials to music videos and documentaries touching on hot topics in our world today. Stephonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s first experience in video was at the age of 16 when he enrolled and went on to complete a two-year vocational program that taught him everything related to television and radio production.

He studied acting, marketing and received a real estate license. Leaving Tri-C he went on to Graduate from The Ohio Center for Broadcasting. Stephon found work right away; he landed a job at a Television station in Amherst, Ohio. There he learned to direct, produce, shoot camera and edit using linear programs. While working various jobs Stephon stayed busier than most by starting his own Production Company and providing various clients with video footage. From weddings to sports to commercials to concerts, Stephon has done it all and is steadily working his way to the top! In this Industry when the ball starts to roll, the ball starts to roll. Jobs started hitting Stephon from all angles. He received a job at a multimedia corporation as an editor, and then he worked at Word City TV, the production facility of The Word Church. From there he was hired as Director of Photography for two feature length films and he co-directed and edited a feature film for Berwsick Films.

Stephon has also produced a Television pilot that is currently being reviewed by several companies such as A&E. He directed, produced, scored, filmed, edited and co-wrote a short film titled â&#x20AC;&#x153;Appearances.â&#x20AC;? Hosted, directed and produced a documentary on minority business. Some of his film credits include; APPEARANCES, CRACKED, THE SECOND LADY, ONE DAY IN HEAVEN, IRINA.

GO TO: www.CBeautyArt.com STAY TUNED FOR UPCOMING ARTISTS!

DA BEAT BLOCK by A-Sharp First off the block i got to say thanks to Daddy Rich a long me friend/ music colleague and editorchief of Urban Image magazine, for giving me this chance to holla at the world on a music level. So to kick things off I'd like to tell you, UIM readers a li le bit about myself, my name is Ashley Smith aka Asharp or Sharp I'm from Marion, In, but currently living in Georgia. I've been producing music for a long me on the local and underground scene, but s ll trying to leave a bigger musical footprint worldwide. My ear is open to all genre of music, from the legendary band Electric Light Orchestra (elo) to Brain Bennet "Voyage" or New Birth "wildflower", some of these musical genies you might not know or even heard off, oh but you might have, if your listening to some of today's music these ar st are being sampled and replayed all the me. Da Beat Block is place for real music lovers and fans to express there thought's and opinions about what's going down in the music world. To check out some of my work feel free to Google SharpShak produc on or at youtube.com/Sharpshak or myspace

Local Music Review For your music to be reviewed and/or make Urban Image Magazine please submit your link or songs to submissions@urbanImageMagazine.com or smith.ash765@gmail.com

What's A-SHARP using to make beats and record vocals?

I am currently using the Miko Timbaland Special Edi on by Open Lab, this machine has everything you need to make hot beats and record vocals. It comes already stock with sounds and uses the Reaper program as your DAW. I like it because it's user friendly, it's my computer, i can load all high quality sounds in it without taken up a bunch of space, you don't have to have drum machines, keyboards or eq stand alone taken up space this is a one man band plus it can mimic any other keyboard or drum machine out there. I have all my MPC sounds and kit's loaded in my MIKO. This thing has got so many features that i can't list them all, plus Open Lab's would have to send me a check for plug'n there gear. There are other version of the Miko and theirs the Niko also so if your trying to get on check Open Labs website. The price range from $4000 and up so get your chips up if you try'n to get one, but it's worth it to me.

Producers&BeatMaker's To all my local and unsigned beat makers and producers keep the heat comin'. Ok first let's define "beat maker" and "producer" for those that don't know the difference. To me a beat maker is a person that strictly do beats no vocal recording, no mixing ect. just beats. A producer is a person that do the beats and record the vocals and takes part of the mixing process. Let's not leave out the engineer, this person polishes the whole thing to what you hear on the radio and cd's. So which category do you fall under only you know, but there all important when it comes to makin' music.

Tips (1) Always take the me to mix's your beats, some me a beat will sound good if the bass is just felt and not the melody. (2) Keep the drums sounding ght and on me, it's the founda on of the beat. (3) Be crea ve use other instrument's tweek your sound's, this is what make's you stand out and not blend in.

What's Hot On The Block!!! The New DJones coming this summer produced by A-Sharp for Sharpshak Ent. The New R.E.DDUB on D.U.E lable h p://www.reverbna on.com/r.e.ddub Check out the The N.O.C.S. "Grown folks Music h p://www.reverbna on.com/NOCS Hot Music from H.$.P. h p://www.reverbna on.com/hsp30 THE N.O.C.S.

R.E.DDUB

H.$.P.

What’s Your Urban Image? Wri en by Candace Mumford

Now days Urban Wear is more than just fashion is a true lifestyle that unlike just a few years ago has no racial boundaries. People of every ethnicity and social economic background are adding steady touches of urban street wear to their style on a daily basis.

Urban wear is more than just fashion and clothes, over me it has become personal statement. The person who is wearing it is sta ng their individuality, their future personal goals and aspira ons way to tell the word on sight what your personal style is without asking. Before urban wear was only associated to hip hop ar sts, 2011 that’s no longer the case. Now, not only hip hop ar sts are donning on the colorful style, it has become a worldwide fashion trend. There are very few celebri es who aren’t approached in regards to launching their personal lines of fashion clothing accessories and shoes.

As men oned, urban wear signifies the individuality of the person wearing it since they can individualized their style and make it stand out. With urban wear undergoing changes, it has become a hit not only to teens or young adults and downright “grown folks” as well. The styling of many urban clothing lines is comparable to some of the best and most established fashion houses around. It can no longer be classified as loud colors, and the stereotypical video wear. This is what makes these lines appealing to higher age groups. It is also star ng to transcend socioeconomic classes. Hip hop ar sts, influen al and public people can be seen wearing this style frequently.

What makes it appealing is the variety. There are diﬀerent clothing styles to choose from like t16

shirts, jeans of all styles, shorts, Capri and cargo pants, and hoodies. Then to take things to another level, urban brands have progressed to evening wear, a er ﬁve wear, gowns and tuxedos These styles could stand out it the crowd whether it is because of their contradic ng styles, colors, graphics, or messages. As evidence of the growing market, would be the many and diﬀerent urban clothing brands in stores and in people’s home. As the average consumer to look around their homes and closets and count how many “urban brands” they already own. These can be on the form of music, magazines ,clothing and the television shows they watch.

for the average consumer. There are several hip hop ar sts who are insistent on wearing inexpensive urban clothing and accessories as their statement against materialism. Urban clothing and hip hop is not about the clothes and jewelries you wear, but the a tude that you wear. With the populariza on and mainstreaming of urban clothing and hip hop, there are numerous stores, whether on-ground or online that are oﬀering various op ons for urban styles. There are some urban clothing followers who may not be into bright colors, baggy pants or loud accessories. But these people are able to mix urban clothing with their tradi onal styles, crea ng another genre of fashion.

It has developed so much that these people already have their own sub-culture. Clothing designs and style reﬂect the mannerisms, way of talking and even walking of those people who wear urban clothing. But this sub-culture has been accepted and became part of American society, and even the world. Japan especially who has actually become known for their urban wear and o en mes wearing it more than Americans!

Urban clothing followers have developed great sense of style since they were able to mix tradi onal and urban wear together. They are becoming adventurous is exploring fashion and breaking rules to express themselves. It can be a miss or hit for different people, but the fact that they were able to assert their individuality is truly courageous. Quite frankly the “miss” comes into play when you find yourself wearing too much of a good thing. Brand names are nice if that floats your boat but wearing a par cular brand from head to toe is a fashion no-no.

Years ago urban wear was pricey, but due to basically becoming more the norm, has become more affordable, though some lines have created different levels of their fashion lines .High end prices for those who can afford it and a more affordable lines

Fashion designers are already paying a en on to this sub-culture and star ng to capitalize on it. Urban clothing designers would build a close

rela onship to street consciousness, iden fying what urban wearers want. A er all, fashion trends would always pick up what is hip and in demand on the street.

Currently, urban clothing designers are addressing or shi ing their a en on to young and street savvy genera on or urban fashion customers. Some would refer to urban wear as “contemporary” or “metropolitan” style. But whatever name it would be, the style, the person’s individuality and the statement that they would like to make would s ll stand out. Colors can change but the soul could not. Fans of urban wear span the globe. From the mid-west to the city.

Urban Wear and How Does it Diﬀer

Urban wear can be deﬁned as a fashion style that combines culture, lifestyles and ideas. Urban fashion sprung up from the hip hop culture of recent years. In the late 80s and un l the 90s, hip hop clothing lines came out designed by no less than the music ar sts themselves. They tried to add their own personal crea vity and style into a fashion that is already unique in itself .In 2011 these very styles are worn by youth as vintage wear. Urban fashion breaks away from the mainstream by embracing exactly that individuality and by not conforming to the trends. Even though it is said that urban fashion originated in New York, it quickly spread and developed integra ng inﬂuences from Europe, Asian, Caribbean and African cultures as well as a variety of music genre like hip hop, punk, rock, and even indie music along the way.

Urban clothing lines also embrace the prac cality of things. The design and concept of urban fashion makes it possible to wear them on a normal day. It is o en referred to as the fashion of the streets. But urban fashion is not street wear. The la er is o en associated with vintage sneakers and school dresses which in some places have developed into the punks, gothic and hippies subcultures. Urban fashion is more edgy and o en incorporates the words “prac cal”, “func onal” and “comfortable”. Urban clothes are light and yet they should be durable and look good as well. So truly the term urban wear covers the spectrum and deﬁnitely molds itself to the individual. So ask yourself...

”What’s YOUR Urban Image?” 18

Skin Care Tips Things to avoid to keep your skin looking younger longer Aging is an inevitable process all crea ons go through. In fact, the aging process is considered natural cycle that everything and everyone must face. But the signs of aging can be delayed or can be hidden through proper skin care. Also remember when wearing makeup. It will only look as good as the skin that's underneath. A daily regime is paramount to keeping it in p top condion. The skin is the most affected area when a person ages. When a person ages, the skin loses its elas city that is why wrinkles and fine lines start to appear especially on the face, neck, and hands. Today, the most common solu on people find is by developing healthy skin care regimen and through the use of a -aging products that can minimize—if not eliminate—the signs of aging. These a -aging products are marketed and adver sed to encourage people to control the early signs of aging such as wrinkles, crow's feet, and other visible fine lines. Keep in mind that a -aging products alone won't do. A healthy diet, lots of water and plenty of rest are also necessary. External Factors That Affect Aging: Before finally deciding whether to use these products or not, you must first know the external factors that greatly contribute to aging in order to avoid them. Here are the major external factors that cause aging and skin aging, it is up to you how to avoid these in order to maintain a young looking and vibrant skin. 1. The sun. This is the major external factor that caused aging. Experts say that aging caused by overexposure to the sun's ultra violet rays is called "photo-aging." In this process, the

sun's rays breaks down the collagen and elas n in the person's skin that lead to the development of premature wrinkles and other facial lines. You can protect yourself from the harmful rays of the sun by applying sun blocks and sun screens that has high SPF content. You can also wear proper ar cles of clothing that help protect your skin from the damaging rays and by lessening the me you spent outdoors especially when the sun is its peak hours. This is the me to break out that cute straw hat you've been saving. 2. The gravity. Science tells us that gravity pulls everything towards the earth. As people age, the effect of gravity becomes visible on the skin and affects its elas city. 3. Excessive smoking. Nico ne indeed plays a big role in skin's aging. Studies show that smokers form lines and wrinkles sooner compared to those who do not smoke. Skin is affected by nico ne because it narrows the blood vessels in the outer layers of the person's skin that is responsible for the reduc on of blood and nutrients flow. 4. Several facial expressions. People have a lot of facial expressions. These expressions are quite inevitable depending on the situa on they are in. Since facial muscles are used when people make facial expressions, this can lead to the forma on of lines in the face and neck. 5. The sleeping posi on. Although it may sound absurd, improper sleeping posi on contributes a lot to aging of the skin because it results to the visibility of wrinkles. A good skin care habit should include adop ng a sleeping posi on that can veer you away from forming lines on the face or even on your body. 6. Avoid excessive alcohol and using drugs. This will age the skin and the body faster than you can blink an eye. By Midnite Love

WHAT UP DAWG! Pet Care, Information & News by Z.E. Brooks OWNING A PET IN THE PROJECTS – A guide to responsible ownership in the hood.

Now let’s be honest, keeping a Tiger in the bedroom and an Alligator in the bathtub is pretty stupid and dangerous. Even if you have the Jack Hanna/Tarzan thing going on, your still not qualified nor is it legal to keep exotic animals in your home or apartment. Many rappers and celebrities may boast about having a Black Panther or a baby shark or even Piranhas as cool, it isn’t. 9 times out of 10 they are kept in tight enclosures that are not adequate space enough for them to thrive and survive properly plus they are tended to by ill trained personnel and the results are disastrous.

police busting down your door and tazing you, the ghetto version of The Beast master. Ownership Statistics – According to the Humane Society of the United States there are 77.5 Million Dogs owned and 93.6 Million Cats. On average Dog owners spend $225 on Vet visits annually, Cat owners spend $203. SOURCE:

http://www.humanesociety.org/issues/ pet_overpopulation/facts/ pet_ownership_statistics.html CATS – First off, if you’re allergic, don’t bother. If you’re not a dog person and need something to keep you company that doesn’t make much noise louder than a cute meow; this is the pet for you. According to the IPCBA ( Int’l Progressive Cat Breeders Alliance.) 73 breeds are recognized. From this extensive list, you can chose from long and short hair, exotic patterns and personalities. They are quiet, independent, most often aloof and have lived with people for centuries.

According to many public housing laws, ( as well as those for single family homes ) any animal you see in the circus, jungle or ocean, poisonous or noisy (such as a Macaw Parrot) has no place in vicinity of people. Even reptiles, such as the Gila Monster and certain fish such as Blow Fish or Lionfish aren’t allowed because many can

The Egyptian Mau being the world’s oldest cat is the ancestor of all the domestic cats today. The breed is over 4000 years old. Cats require minimal space but a place where they can lounge and sun themselves such as by a window or balcony (properly fenced for safety) as

be poisonous. Let’s talk about what you can have without the

well as to relieve themselves such as a litter box in the bathroom. Cats sleep 13-16 hours a day so you don’t have to worry about them getting into trouble. Now a word of caution, get a scratch post. The last thing you need is your furniture shredded, so make sure you give them something rough to scratch on. A wicker or straw floor mat will do the trick as well. As far as feeding and specific breed care, it varies but on the regular make sure you have an adequate amount of water and equal amount of dry and wet food set aside for them twice a day. In the morning before your set off for the day and around the time you have your dinner. Human food is not good for their delicate digestive systems so when shopping for your cats food, make sure that the ingredients are almost good enough for you to eat such as rice, fish, chicken, beef and pork. I recommend high quality foods with natural fish oils to keep their stomachs clear of hairballs. Foods to avoid would be milk (despite what popular belief says, milk gives cats diarrhea) nuts, chocolate, grapes and raisins. These cause kidney failure and hyperactivity.

want to dedicate.

Hyper dogs such as the Jack Russell (pictured above) are tightly wound up balls of energy that doesn’t fade for seven years. If you have children who are taught to be gentle yet firm with this breed, you may have a winner. Otherwise, don’t even think about a dog that could leapt a five to six foot fence in a single bound. Low-Key dogs like many lap dogs such as Cavalier Spaniels, Lassa Apsos, Shitzu, and Bichón (Bee-shon) Fresé are perfect for a young family but keep in mind these dogs don’t like to be roughly played with but are friendly enough to be the perfect small breed pet. Older dogs usually have the temperament and patience, they are usually for singles, or families with older children. They may also need the most medical care, consider your choices when weighing the options of adopting a small, medium or large breed dog that is older than 7 yrs. http://www.theshelterpetproject.org/ is a GREAT site for seeking the perfect pet addition to your family. Good Luck and be kind to ALL animals. ZB

DOGS – America’s best friend

(This is my boy “Rahlee” at 8 weeks old) I love dogs. Sporting/Herding dogs to be exact, in fact I own two Louisiana Catahoula Leopard Dogs and one Carolina Boon dog ( Which is actually just a Pointer breed raised in the Carolinas) All bred for hunting & herding they are best suited for country living. However, when it comes to dogs for Urban living, you don’t need to go the gangster dog route ( i.e. Pit bulls) to get attention.

Should you get a puppy or an Adult dog? Depends on your lifestyle and the time you

THIS STORY IS BASICALLY ABOUT A FLEA MARKET THAT WAS STARTED A FEW YEARS AGO AND IT IS NOW BLOOMING WITH NEW AUTHORS AND ARTISTS AND THEY'RE FINALLY SUCCEEDING IN WHAT THEY'D BEEN DREAMING OF. TYSON GRAVITY WAS THE ONLY PERSON I HAD THE LUXURY OF SPEAKING WITH.

Tyson Gravity began his life as a young, production manager for one of the most popular radio stations in the south. Without hesitation nor warning, Gravity quit his job and moved back to his community in Philadelphia. Every person has a calling and his calling was to help those who are less fortunate or those who just needed a little boost of confidence and motivation. Gravity named his calling, "Black and Nobel." With products such as music, books, and different oils and lotions, this entrepreneur is on a roll. Gravity's hands are busy with creative writers, such as author and street hustler, Tra Verdeja. He began with a history, a dream, and a book, and new he's one of Gravity's best business partners. Gravity came home from the south because he felt something pulling him back to his community. Just like any other neighborhood in America, you can hear the sirens in the background, but Gravity doesn't allow the negativity to destroy the hard work he and his family has began. Gravity also has his own photography business along with a media company as well. Tyson Gravity Media is also up and coming business that keeps him on the roads to riches. Gravity began this company with one box of books and some reggae music. With that came several customers an many more writers looking to hit the shelves. With writers comes the business minded people with their products as well. Other artists, singers, rappers, and song writers bring their music to be sold, not only do they have music, they also sale candles, oils, and Shea butters. Black and Nobel is currently in the process of finding a bigger building for their company. With so many new clients and customers, they must expand their storage space. With very little ventilation for the cold winters and hot summers, you'll never hear one of these hard workers complaining because they make it their business to serve and help anyone that's trying to make better with their lives. Gravity keeps Black and Nobel tasteful and respectful, he greets anyone who walks into or past his door of business. Once you walk into Black and Nobel, you won't leave without purchasing something. 24

Title-28 Days Til Freedom Black History month was February and to help celebrate our country's quest for equality and freedom, former convicted felon, OG Law, built a prison cell in his childhood community and lived there for 28 days. Dressed in only his prison jumpsuit, he made a mark in the lives of teenagers and children through the state. Parents were traveling from surrounding cities just to get a visualization of life without freedom, even though he was a free man. Several wanted to know the meaning and reasoning behind such behavior and they wanted to know why Law would endanger his health and well being by living in such harsh conditions. The cell was to show young adults and troubled youth what life behind bars was truly like. Inside the small cell, Law slept on his cot with an electronic heater and his thin blanket. Armed with a notepad and pen, Law is out in the cold with no weapons to fight against the chilly winds and snows. Law was risking his life to prove a point to keep violence to a minimal in the city. Even though Law was only behind bars for 28 days, to some of the youth who came to visit him, that would seem like an eternity. Within the first five days of his adventure, Law had changed the hearts and minds of several troubled youth and struggling parents. Among those was a young man who was acting out in school and disobedient towards his mother. She brought him to the sight and Law asked what had been going on. Minutes later, the troubled young man was inside the cell with Law, talking about the rights and wrongs of life. When the young man stepped out of the cell, his heart had been changed and his mother saw the son she had grown to love. Another mother dropped her son off and road around the block for a few minutes, when she returned, her child was apologizing to her and letting her know the old habits and ways had died. The power of the inside of a jail cell is remarkable. Knowing that you'll be spending the rest of your life in jail for total ignorance is enough to make any child or young adult straighten up in life. That goes to show, in life, you can be locked up or a prisoner of your own troubles or past ways. Although, you're free, mentally, you're behind bars. Writen By Vanna Nicole

This month’s Author Spotlight is Frank C. Matthews

About Frank C. Matthews

Prodigious and profound author Frank C. Matthews’ triumphant transformation from inmate to novelist has established him as a leading force in the world of urban literature. Armed with his mastery of the written word, Matthews has achieved feats that are only reserved for the most seasoned of writers, selling an unprecedented amount of books as a first-time author and self-publisher. When it comes to putting the urban voice – the human voice – on the page, Matthews has no peer. His unprecedented journey demonstrates that even when confronted with a web of trials and tribulations, creativity has the ability to flourish. As a New York City native, Matthews grew up with aspirations of one day becoming a household name as an NBA Superstar. His dream took a detour, but his resilience and determination allowed him to persevere.

The lure of the streets and its fast money took Matthews away from hoops and into another game – the drug trade – where he found instant success. But a deal gone bad

eventually landed him behind bars. Once incarcerated, Matthews had few options of how to spend his seemingly unending time in what felt like a black hole drawing at all happiness. Taking advantage of the still and silent nights, Matthews spent hours plunged into two of the world’s most renowned, contemporary African-American storytellers, Iceberg Slim and Donald Goines.

The books empowered the now bright-eyed and enthusiastic Matthews and awakened a creative bug to tell the stories locked inside him. “Incarceration transformed me,” said Matthews. “I went from a young, frustrated, and confused boy to a mature, humble, and pensive man.” Much the way Malcolm X used the power of words to transform himself in prison, Matthews used the power of the pen to write his way to freedom, real freedom. While the calamities of his past may have blackened his vision they did not still his pen. He found his purpose. He would write his stories in notebooks, on torn-open envelopes, and anything he could get his hands on and would pass them around through the system. While some traded cigarettes, Matthews traded his highly demanded stories, which inmates clung to like emotional life rafts.

Matthews delved into the business of publishing, an industry he now planned to one day master. He found his style of writing to be unique, labeling it as “true fiction,” an alternate take on real events he had witnessed firsthand. He honed his craft and further developed a distinctive writing style that was uninhibited, dramatic yet cinematic as his readers traveled to adventurous sonic territory. He had a burning desire to share his rare experiences in the underworld of crime with anyone who would listen. Matthews’ drive and passion was reinvigorated. He would be relentless in his pursuit to share with the masses his tales of underworld crime, drama, brotherhood and love.

Upon his rebirth in 2005, Matthews discovered that he could put his past behind him and emerge with a renewed sense of purpose and unwavering determination. The resilient author took his astounding gift of writing “true fiction,” coupled with his compulsion for

words and decided to pursue his passion. Even after numerous failed attempts at landing a publishing deal, Matthews did what he learned to do best – create opportunities for himself. He knew that there was an untapped niche audience eager to hear his voice, and he was steadfast in his desire to supplant the current favorites in the urban lit arena.

Matthews self-published one of his first novels, Respect the Jux, and it caught fire, selling over 20,000 thousand copies. The book catapulted Matthews into the sphere typically reserved for seasoned literary greats while capturing the attention of everyone from rappers Jay-Z, Ghostface Killer, and 50 Cent (who rapped on Lloyd Banks’s single, “Hands up, if you want to party with crooks you have to learn to Respect the Jux!”) to literary powerhouses like bestselling author and publisher Karen Hunter.

The gripping tale borrows from Matthews’ recollection of urban legends through the saga of Cat, who journeyed from Jamaica to the United States as a teenager. After a stint in the military, Cat returned with newfound skills and a desire for his own version of the American Dream—by any means necessary. Using his extensive military background in weapons and intelligence, Cat formed “The Order,” a band of thieves that specialized in pulling off juxes, which Matthews defines as emulating and acquiring another’s style, intellect, or swagger for personal advancement.

Captivating, intriguing, mesmerizing – all words that describe Frank Matthews’ uncanny ability to bring readers into the worlds that he creates. His first auspicious debut Respect

the Jux, a dynamic tale of brotherhood, greed, and power, hits the shelves nationwide in September, the style made famous by Slim and Goines will be revived…with a 21st century twist!

(Source: Pump Up Your Book)

Interview with Frank C. Matthews

First of all Frank, I would like to thank you for taking the time out for this interview!

If you have to describe yourself with one word, what would it be? SUPERNOVA!

What did you do before you were a writer?

I’ve always been an entrepreneur; I’ve owned several businesses in the past.

What are you working on right now?

I just submitted my second book “bury me in it”; in addition to that I’ve been working on the TV series for “Respect The Jux”

How long did it take you to write Respect the Jux?

It took me about 90 days to write.

What type of research goes into your books?

All of my books are written from two degrees of separation, so I either lived it or I was there to witness it. So not much research is needed

What is the main source of inspiration for your writing?

I would say my life. I have a very unique story and a very vivid way of expressing it in my work.

Who is your biggest supporter?

I would say my children, my family

Is there a place you go for inspiration to write?

I just wake up and go outside, I write what’s happening right now in life and what has already happened. So I don’t I have go too far.

Are you reading anything right now?

I’m reading the Bible and the Koran everyday.

What do you like to do when you are not writing (hobbies, etc.)?

Work out, play sports and on hot summer days bring out one of my motorcycles

What advice would you give to those aspiring writers out there?

Stay true yourself, and once you start writing a book, stick with it until you complete it.

Is there anything else about yourself that you would like your readers to know?

Visit my website frankmatthews.com, and be on the look out for my other books which should be release every 6-9 months

What is next for you in 2011?

More books, The Respect the Jux TV series and I have I few surprises in the works so stay tuned

How can your readers contact you?

Frankmatthews.com, twitter: frank_matthews or Facebook: Frank C Matthews

Thank you very much for taking the time out to answer my interview questions. I look forward to knowing more about you and reading more books written by you in the future!

About The Book: Title: Respect the Jux Author: Frank C. Matthews Publisher: Simon &amp; Schuster Adult Publishing Group Pages: Paperback; 288 pages Source: Frank C. Matthews/Pump Up Your Book Virtual Tour

MEET CAT

In Jamaica . . . he learned the art of the â&#x20AC;&#x153;juxâ&#x20AC;?: robbing people by studying their everyday movements. By the age of eight, Cat was shoplifting and purse-snatching. By ten, he had his first gun. At fifteen, he committed his first murder. 33

MAKE THE GANG

In New York City . . . he created The Order: a secret society of thieves who played by Cat’s rules. He taught his crew how to pull off the perfect jux. Made them swear on a bible and a bullet. Robbed dealers, pushers, thugs. And raked in millions. Then Cat was betrayed—by one of his own men.

BREAK THE RULES

In Miami . . . he set up a new operation. Bigger game, bigger stakes. The targets are prime—athletes, politicians, drug lords, celebrities—and the payoff is huge. But the party scene is as dangerous as the ladies are beautiful. Cat has to watch his back and remember the rules: Never trust a thief. Never get caught. And always . . .

RESPECT THE JUX

A novel based on true events, written by a man who experienced it within two degrees of separation.

Source: Goodreads

Three Reasons Review: 1) Reasons I chose this book: 

I have been reviewing books for the Pump Up Your Book Tour and this book is listed on the tour. I have been reading a lot of books by black authors/urban lit, so I jumped at the chance to read this book as soon as I saw it on the Pump Up Your Book Tour!

 I also was asked by Richarh Tyson a/k/a Daddy Rich to interview Frank C. Matthews for the March issue of Urban Image Magazine, so that really made me want to read the book even more and find out more about the author.

2.) Reasons you liked or disliked this book:

Reasons I liked this book: 

Cat was really determined. He may have gone about getting things the wrong way, but he got what he wanted. He was tired of how boring his life was and tired of seeing things other people had that he didn't have. He saw someone with a big wad of money, and he wanted that too. He wanted the easy life. He knew how to pull off a jux, so he just needed to recruit some people to his secret society of thieves.

 Cat really came up with some good recruits and he was smart. After he recruited the people, he kind of stepped down and focused on finding the jobs so they could carry the jobs out.  Cat really knew how to pull off the job. When someone thought that they had everything that they could possibly get from the victim, Cat knew other places to look to make sure there wasn't more.  If you have read my blog at all, you know I am all about the sex scenes. This book had some really hot sex scenes in it.  I got really immersed in this book and was really rooting for Cat and his recruits, even though what they were doing was so totally wrong. I just got so caught up in the book!  This book was a page turner! I didn't dislike anything about this book!

3.) Reasons you are recommending this book

 I definitely recommend this book because it really was fast moving and a page turner!  Need I remind you about the sex scenes :)  Frank C. Matthews is a talented writer and you should read his work! 35

Three Reasons Review Format

5/5 Diamonds Highly recommend!

Disclaimer: I received this book from the Frank C. Matthews/Pump Up Your Book Virtual Tour. I was not compensated for my review. My thoughts on this book were in no way influenced by the author or publicist. They are my personal reflections based solely on MY experience while reading this novel.

ÂŠ 2011, Cheryl of Black Diamond's Book Reviews. All Rights Reserved. If you reading this on a site other than, Black Diamond's Book Reviews, Urban Image Magazine, or Cheryl's feed, be aware that this post has been stolen and is used without permission.

Cyber- Bullying By: Keshia Cook

As someone that was bullied when I was younger I understand how these kids feel but I never understood it. Now its even worse with all these social networks such as Twi er, Facebook, and Myspace even text messages is a whole other level of bullying. I’ve never experienced cyber-bullying but I always wondered what made these people so angry to bully someone on the Internet? I came up with this idea to go “undercover” and see what makes these people ck. I created this presence on twi er named @msurwetdream. She’s a 20-something raunchy bi-sexual from Jersey. I wanted to create a personality that no one would believe it was me. So for weeks I plastered pictures up and had so real explicit conversa ons with people even sent and received pictures and nothing I just got tons of followers even got offered a modeling job on worldstarhiphop, but no bullying. It wasn’t un l I put up a picture of breasts that I finally got a taste of what exactly Cyber-bullying is. It started from 8:30 am to 1:45 pm from many different people. I was called a whore, slut; I was even told that I shouldn’t reproduce. For the most part I thought it was hilarious but it started to get to me when they said my parents did a horrible job raising me and the picture wasn’t even of my breast! I never gave any of them a reason to say anything to me but for some reason they decided to go all in. I finally asked someone why would you say all that stuff about me and I never got an answer. I don’t think anyone with ever answer that ques on. I understand that everyone has the right to say and do whatever he or she please but maybe use a li le considera on when doing so. 38

Dear Emiaj, I am not sure what to do. I have been seeing a man that was married to an old co-worker of mine for the last few months. She and I were not best friends but we did socialize off and on, and I was a guest in her home a me or two. He keeps telling me that he wants to be more than just friends. I try to explain to him how this would look to others, but he doesn’t seem to care. I have no ced lately that he has wanted to spend all of his free me with me. I work forty hours a week and have a child; so my free me is limited. He constantly asks me if there is someone else I am seeing. I did let him know that I had another guy that was interested, but we are just friends like I am trying to be with him. He got upset with me and didn’t speak to me for days. I was honest but got the silent treatment; that le me confused. When we did speak I asked him why he tries to take all of my free me. He has told me the reason he does this is to keep me focused on him; that way I wouldn’t want any other man. We also constantly talk through text message, as well as phone calls; all day long. When we don’t talk he ques ons why haven’t we spoken? I try to tell him that I need a li le space but he comes at me harder. Now, on a daily basis he asks me if I need anything (money, food, gas, etc.). I always tell him no but I always manage to have an envelope on my car in the morning when I leave for work. In the last two weeks I have counted three hundred and fi y dollars and that doesn’t include the items that he has purchased. The ques on of sex has come up, but I dodge it. I only really want to be his friend. When I say this he always comes back to “friends with benefits”. My mind travels to thinking he is doing all of this just to sleep with me. I really do like him and I just really want to take it slow. I also feel like I am not supposed to go any further due to I know his ex-wife. Please help me out Emiaj!

ASK EMIAJ

“Stuck in between” 40

Dear Stuck in between, This is a very tricky situa on, because you have to pick in between your loyalty and your happiness. You said that you and his ex-wife use to socialize with one another, and you had been to their home. I would not go any further with him, from just knowing that. Look at it like this if you were to go further with him and they have kids together then you and her will have to co-exist with one another. Let’s adventure into her mind when she sees you for the first me with him. “Wait, I know her… I use to work with her… That is his new girlfriend… Hold up, she use to come over my house…” She is having this conversa on in her head the en re me of you are speaking and saying your hellos. She s going to ques on what your mo ve was when you all use to hang out. She is going to want to know if you were looking at him then. That creates unnecessary drama. Who wants to deal with that type of mess? You are a woman you know how women think. Yes they are divorced but you knew them both while they were s ll married. It has already crossed your mind what others would think; so you already know your answer to that. I am so glad you have not had sex with this man. He does not understand that you only want his friendship; nothing more, nothing less. He wants your “cookie” because he feels like he has already paid for it by now with the money and the gi s. If you s ll have the money I would give it back to him. You are not a pros tute and you do not sale “cookies” for a living. I am sorry you can’t buy affec on from someone. I also like that you are honest with him, but he doesn’t seem like the strong type that can take a woman knowing what she does and doesn’t want. He might be used to women bending to him. I suggest to you to keep your op ons open. This is not the man for you. He lacks pa ence, and understanding. He seems to me to be looking for a cookie jar to put money down for and take out whatever he wants when he wants. That is not a healthy situa on at all. It has a recipe to it that comes out “stalker”. Reason being he will begin to think he owns you. You will not be able to go and do as you please. You might be out one night with your girls and all of a sudden he pops up; you didn’t even tell him where you were going. You met is representa ve when he was married to your ex-coworker. You are ge ng his real person now. Sit back and think did she ever say something to you that made you think he was a bit clingy. I suggest you hand him his walking papers and keep it moving. Go out and date a man who wants to have your friendship first. That man will understand the things that you are looking for out of life. Emiaj AskEmiaj@gmail.com

**Follow up** I spoke with the young lady who wrote this le er last week, the man she was speaking of did eventually proposi on her about having sex with him for money. 41

The responsibility of your “Sista” The first time it happens to you, it is breathtaking. All the symptoms of that falling in love experience, but none of the pleasure. Your heart beats faster, the words leave you, your stomach drops….yet the feeling of being overwhelming hurt and angry quickly consumes the mind. You are not blissfully happy. You are ready for a fight. The moment you find out that someone else is pleasing your man, you are emotion exposed.

knowing and the know nothing. The “know nothing” is the woman who is being snowed along with the significant other. She knows nothing about the wife and/or family. She thinks her pursuer is single. I don’t want to talk to her. I want to talk to the “all knowing” mistress. She knows all about the family structure and continues to pursue the man despite his obligations to someone else’s heart. This is the woman I want to understand. I have enough life experiences to know that they are not all the same, and that they are not all evil women undeserving of forgiveness or mercy. I just want to make a plea.

Yet, I don’t want to discuss the essence of the pain. Many of us know that all too well. I want to have the discussion that I once was denied. I want to talk to the women who know that they are dealing with a taken man, and they continue to pursue him. One of the things that the pain of being cheated on desires more than anything else is the confrontation with the opposition. However, many times it is not about physical brutality. For me it was a means of affirmation. I wanted to be able to look a woman in her eyes that knew that she was disrupting the already oppressed functionality of the black family structure. I wanted to see her soul to search for the void she was trying to fill. I wanted to size her up to see for myself what she had that I did not. I wanted to see what type of woman lowered herself to those standards. I wanted to see. Yet, that desire never came to fruition. I never got to meet her or converse, hence, the soapbox.

I know that a good man is a wonderful benefit to a woman’s plight. I know that seeing a man who works hard, provides, and loves his woman and/or his children makes him even more appealing. But, knowing that the only thing we generally want is to be happy and to find the man that takes good care of us means that we must respect when our fellow sistas have found him. It is a responsibility to the “sistahood” to take care of the good relationships that are constructive and be a place of refuge for those that are destructive. I want us, as black women, to cherish the relationships that are beneficial to changing the dynamics of our race’s future. We should participate in showing our daughters how to be real women. We should take pride in the fact that with or without a man, we are dignified beings with respect for what is right. Our role forces us to be the conscience of the race and

There are two types of mistresses, the all

the nurturers of our nation. In that, our work is great. However, in our moment of selfishness, we should desire a man that is holy and wholly ours. One who can profess of intimacy with no other. One who we can take pride in saying we shared in his becoming amazing. One who the world sees as ours, solely as well as “soully”. We are responsible for the amount of respect we show each other and the way the world views us. If responsibility is not enough of a reason to perpetuate monogamous relationships, then remember that we all reap what we sow. Karma is just another way of saying what you give to the world is what you will draw from it. One day you will find the man you want to cherish. What will life allow you to draw- hurt or happiness? Wouldn’t you feel much more confident knowing that a group of sistas felt a sense of responsibility to pray for your relationship rather than prey upon it? I have faith in our ability to walk in this light, and faith propels deeds thus, deeds become accomplishments. Change begins with a simple step of faith.

Sh'Moore shares a story of love, loss and new beginnings. Coming soon her ﬁrst novel, "A Lover's Redemp on" When me brings a divide between vows, God has a plan for man's decep on. Author Sh'Moore leaves her readers to queson the outcomes of entangled lives. A er the dust se les... Will Shamia come clean? Will Stephan realize his faults? Will Devion move on? The lives of these characters become entangled as one woman steps out in search of what she isn't ge ng at home. Coming soon: "A Lover's Redemp on" Preorder your copy today! h p://shmoore.net/

~Sh’Moore Not a Rela onship Specialist, but a Rela onship Realist

Ba le of the Sexes

“Is child support fair or is the system abused by women?” I sat down with several individuals including myself and posed the ques on: Is child support fair or is the system abused by women? In this conversa on there are fathers who have custody of their kids, mothers who do not and pay child support, as well as single mothers, and singles with no kids. Every one weighed in on the topic. You would be amazed at the things the things that some of these parents go through. In speaking with Kimmy B. we found that she actually pays child support for her three kids. Her children father plays the role of the “ungrateful sorry baby mama”. (Yep, I said it) Here she pays a good amount monthly and her kids come to her looking a mess. The funds that he receives are not all that she does. She gets them on her weekend, buys them clothing, pays for school ac ves, etc. If this was a woman sending her kid to their father’s home he would act a fool on her. So, why is there such a double standard when it becomes a topic? There are such things as a father being that spiteful. It is not always the mother who plays these silly games. She also stated that he will not even let her claim one child on her income tax. Here she is working hard to pay child support and maintain bill in her home and she can’t claim one child of her three. He can barely keep a job and his wife works whenever she wants to, Now tell me how fair that seems. Now, take Anthony B. (no rela on to Kimmy B.), he has custody of his 16 year old daughter and her mother pays 300.00 a month in child support but has not seen her child in that me. This is a clear example that money does not equal me. He stated, “I would give it all back if she just comes see her child.” Deadbeat mothers do exist whether world wants to accept it or not. Yes we are taught at a young age that the mother is the nurturer and the father is the provider, but what are we to do when those tables are turned. We need more fathers to step up to the plate and do what they are supposed to do when the mother is not doing her part. As a single mother myself, I found that some mes you have to show people that you mean business when it comes to the lively hood of your child. I receive child support but I only started it because he changed our agreement. All I asked for was help with daycare, and we all know how much day care runs a month. He failed to do so, so I did what I had to do. He came out paying more than what his half of daycare was less than what I receive in child support. He would have come cheaper. Who am I to say anything, because he refused to listen to the reasoning of the situa on? I became every name in the book; you name it he said it. All because I did what I had to do to make sure the bills for our daughter would get paid? While, some may know my story others may not. My daughter is a twin and her iden cal twin sister died at 11 months of age. So you would think he would do what he supposed to do because he has lived the same lost as I. No! He barely spends me with his daughter. I will repeat myself when saying this, “Money doesn’t equal Time”. There were a few individuals who don’t have kids that chimed in on the conversa on. Some supported the fact that parents went out and did what they needed to do. While another said that there is no need for a third-party. Do you think I wanted to have a middle man added to my situa on? No! People change, they go back on their word. Then you are thrust back into a world that is unfamiliar to you. You are forced to ﬁgure out what bill has to go behind just to eat. I simply have to say about single people who don’t have kids, you can’t comment un l you’ve literally walked in my shoes or any other single parents out here doing what they need to do. It is called “Child Support”. The system is created to support the child not a grown up. Grown up support is called “Alimony or Spousal Support”. Child support sta s cs from November 2007 shows that among 13.7million custodial parents in the U.S 54% if that many have some type of child support agreement in place. While 92% of that child support agreements were established in a court o through a governmental agency. The other 8% were informal child support arrangement among the two parents. (www.singleparents.about.com) By: Emiaj 44

Whose Child is This? Wri en by Candace Mumford

In a perfect world we'd all like to think when that when the news of a child arriving it would always be a wonderful thing. The reality is that it o en mes isn't. Casual sex is had by many and even when you are in what you believe to be a commi ed rela onship can you really trust that this baby is your child?

So what is the right thing to do in situa ons such as these? Let's be real folks. This has to always come from the standpoint of a man because as a woman you KNOW who you have slept with. So should a man who does not have the es of marriage to you simply take your word for it? In these days and me I would have to say absolutely not. A paternity test is in order. Far too many men are being stuck taking care of children that aren't theirs simply because they didn't want to offend their partner. Well in the grand scheme of things, what is the greater offense? A man taking care of a child he was lead falsely to believe he was his and a child not really knowing who it's father is or a moment of offense on the part of the mother?

So when is the correct me to tell a woman that unless the two of you are married, any children you have will be tested? In a nutshell it should be stated at the start of any sexual rela onship you begin. Now we wont leave out the fact that everyone should be par cipa ng in safe sexual prac ces to protect you from sexually transmi ed diseases as well as unwanted pregnancies, but let's be real. People in rela onships tend to get lazy, where you once used a condom, now you want to go raw. Your lady who used to be faithful taking her birth control pills now is missing them two or three days a week!

So if you have the conversa on on what you'll do prior to ever laying down with her, how can a woman ever be oﬀended if not for ego s cal reasons? So what would be some of the reasons she may not agree. 1. I thought we'd fallen in love now? 2. Don't you trust me? 3. It's humilia ng to have you ask me for a test! What will everyone think?

Well quite frankly in the words of Tina Turner.....”What's Love Got to Do with It?” Paternity tests are not a ques on of ones love for your partner. Nor is it a ques on of you having a lack of trust for your partner. If you are not married to your partner. Is is an obliga on to yourself, to enter the life long commitment of parenthood know beyond a shadow of a doubt that the child in ques on is your. Let's also not forget the fact that there are men who are actually married to women having the very same issue in regards to being

lied to by their wives and taking care of children who in all actuality are not theirs. Why would a single man take on this responsibility with no solid proof? So let's give a brief rundown on what's involved in establishing paternity. In layman’s language, paternity is essen ally being a father or fatherhood. Technically, a father contributes one-half of the gene c makeup of his children. (DNA tests can determine biological paternity.)

If an unmarried couple has a child, state laws do not necessarily recognize the man as the legal, biological father. Establishing paternity is to take legal ac on to claim fatherhood. So it's very important to know the laws of your individual state.

Beneﬁts With the legal establishment of paternity, a father can now have a social, economic, and emo onal e with his child. By the same token, he can ensure that the child receives the same rights and privileges as other children. No longer can you automa cally be denied rights to your child based on the mothers whims when the rela onship has ended. Having established paternity from the start ,will save you me and stress in the end.

These rights and privileges include inheritance, access to the father’s medical and life insurance beneﬁts as well as that of Social Security and veteran’s beneﬁts.

Rela onships An established paternity will aﬀord the child to develop a rela onship with the father. There is now a sense of iden ty and connec on not just with the father but with their father’s family. (Moreover, it is a chance to know the medical history of the father and his family for future references.) This also extends to other family members being able to establish a solid rela onship with the child from the start.

Family Name Just as important as the social and economic beneﬁts is the child’s right to know and form a rela onship with both parents. Establishing paternity will now allow the child to have and use the father’s name.

If the child's father or mother decides not to establish paternity, the child will not be en tled to the father's surname, nor will the child receive any beneﬁts. Though in many states this does not hold true. A mother can give the child the fathers last name, but may not name him as the father on the birth cer ﬁcate.

Acknowledgment of Paternity There are many ways to establish paternity. Paternity acknowledgment is the voluntary process of the unwed father being recognized as the biological father primarily for support purposes.

This is usually signed at the hospital a er the child is delivered. When the mother signs the acknowledgment, she veriﬁes she was unwed at the me and that the man is the biological father.

When the father signs too he agrees that he is the biological father of the child and that he shall be responsible for the child’s ﬁnancial and medical support un l adulthood.

Assumed Paternity Some states follow what is known as the Mansﬁeld Rule. In essence, the rule states that if a child is conceived within marriage, the husband is presumed to be the father.

Since this is not always correct, some states have legisla on that challenge and rebut this assump on. Many husbands are now asked if they doubt the child is his at the me of birth and can establish at that me that though they are married there is a ques on of paternity.

Default Establishment Some mes, paternity in some states is established by default. Condi ons vary but essen ally if a man does not fulﬁll certain obliga ons, he will be named the legal father of the child. So it is very important that if you are a man who has been served paternity papers for a child to not avoid the situa on. Evading the law will only serve one purpose, to make you the father of a child that may not be yours should you choose not to show up for tes ng.

In Illinois, for instance, a man becomes a default father for failing to a end a scheduled interview.

Judicial Establishment This is the judicial process where the alleged father refuses to acknowledge paternity. This process can also be used when a mother does not acknowledge the paternity of a man who believes he is the child’s father.

Richard Darnell McVickers is a hot mess. As a self-proclaimed player, hustler and gangster, he is always one step ahead of the law. On the other hand, he is loyal to his friends and family and a licensed real estate agent. Author Daddy Rich’s potent mix of the real and the ridiculous makes his novel an exciting read. McVickers aka Big Mac is a classic antihero, someone you find yourself rooting for even though he’s always up to no good. There is a realness in this character that many readers will find appealing, especially those who will be looking for a sequel to this raw street tale. Because with all the unexpected twists and turns in this book, there will be a hunger for more Big Mack A product of Marion, Indiana, Big Mack has eight kids and seven baby mommas, a white girlfriend, an ex-wife and a female probation officer who has the hots for him. He is also a licensed realtor and a cocaine dealer. And one more thing, Big Mack is an aspiring rap artist with an eye on a deal that will make all the drama in his life add up to a monster payday. He just has to stay out of jail long enough to make all his hip hop dreams come true. Author Daddy Rich has created a strong voice in Big Mack, a character with much energy and dramatic spirit. In this street epic, there is great use of foreshadowing that has the reader racing from one chapter to the next. In the main story, Big Mack and partner in crime Fatboy plan a crime caper that involves robbing a drug connection. This leads to much plotting and planning along with some humorous writing and authentic drug talk that will be an education for squares, letting them in on the for real drug game, how real drug dealing gangsters talk about it. Big Mack’s world is colorful and dangerous. Made even more so because Mack is just off a six year bid for dealing cocaine. But he is so addicted to The Game that he can’t stop, won’t stop. He is a self-proclaimed dope boy by nature. There is much black comedy here as the reader follows Big Mack’s double life, real estate agent by day, drug dealer and cold blooded killer by night. Because music is his first love, Big Mack manages to write his rhymes, produce his music, and secure a record deal. A major part of the suspense is will Big Mack live long enough to realize his dreams of rap superstardom. Big Mack’s active sex life makes for many erotic passages that are well written and advance the plot, placing all the hot action in real life situations that make this street story all the more compelling. Whether dealing with an ex-wife, a girlfriend or groupies, the sex is extreme but is compatible with the raw flavor of this street saga. All of this comes to a dramatic conclusion when a Task Force of informants, detectives, prosecutors and judges focus their attention on Big Mack. Their determination to bring him down sets the stage for Big Mack’s final act of revenge. In Mack’s Revenge All Hell Breaks Loose, Daddy Rich has created a legend. -Terry Benjamin, N-House Review

MACK’S REVENGE AVAILABLE AT AMAZON.COM GANGSTA-LIT.COM BARNSANDNOBLE.COM 48

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Which one do you fall under falling in love or falling in like? By: Keshia Johnson

Ladies how many of y’all believe in love at first sight. I don’t believe in it because you don’t know anything about the person. The only thing that is a rac ng you is that person looks. A lot of us have daddy issues that make us date the wrong guys. The first sweet thing a guy said to a female she runs with that informa on and tells her friends she met her prince charming. A er a month of them da ng the female finally noce the guy true colors and complains why she can’t find a real guy. Guys like that is not different he’s just ge ng his Denzel Washington on with you. Ladies just because he say something sweet doesn’t mean you should let him water your garden. Get to know that guy just because y’all been together for six months doesn’t mean you’re in love with that person. Know every side of that guy past, future, goals and etc. Because once y’all move together you will see true colors of that guy. Ladies you need to really know that person you bringing in your life because this guy could get a crazy check once a month. You need to be from the same book and page to understand each other. Ladies love yourself and let love find you be pa ent love will come when you least expect it. The best thing you can do is let it flow don’t assume it’s going to be a walk in the park. Once y’all take me out to know each other don’t run away from the first problem work it out. Communica on and trust is the keys to a healthy rela onship. The best thing you can do is let it flow don’t assume it’s going to be a walk in the park. So which one do you fall under?

Communica on By Erica M Policastro

Many would kill for freedom of speech some have fought for freedom of speech but yet we lack communica on in our rela onship. We o en turn to our friends before we turn to our mate and it shouldn’t be like that. Some of us will discuss the problems we have in our rela onship with are friends instead of our mate. We should be talking to our mates. Some mes our mates need to feel that we can be best friends and should be our best friends and we should be able to talk to them about anything. When talking to each other we should always listen to what the other has to say. Some mes we as people forget to help each other when trying to get our mate to understand. We o en like to blame the other mate for stuﬀ they did not do all because we can’t seem to communicate with one other. Instead we decide to send texts instead of si ng down and having a normal conversa on. We can’t talk to our mates how will we ever know what’s on their minds and how will we ever try to ﬁx any problems or concerns they may have. Always communicate with your mate so things can stay alive. If we don’t commutate how will we be able to say what we want or need. Some mes we o en take our problems out on our mates when they have nothing to do with it maybe they can help the situa on or always led you an ear to listen. Communica on is the key to a good rela onship always remember to talk to your mate like he/ or she is your best friend

We are a rela onship forum designed with the grown and sexy people in mind. Our mission is to bridge the gap between the sexes while keeping it real. Join us for some good conversa on on all topics related to rela onships. Have some fun in a laid back environment and have some fun along the way. Registra on is free and easy so join today thelovedenforum.com Also check out other sites: h p://www.facebook.com/thelovedenforum h p://twi er.com/Thelovedenforum h p://www.myspace.com/540693322 h p://minglecity.com/proďŹ le/TheLoveDen h p://thelovedenforum.tumblr.com/ p://thelovedenforum.tumblr.com/ h p://www.facebook.com/Pu hecheatersassonblast h p://www.facebook.com/theurbanspotlight h p://theurbanspotlight.blogspot.com/ p://theurbanspotlight.blogspot.com/

A DREAM STARRING YOU AND ME By Ceciliawriter I went to sleep thinking about you and me As my head hit the pillow I imagined you close to me So close I could feel your body heat warming me Your arm was possessively around my waist and you pulled me close to you I felt your shaft resting against my butt You kissed me on my ear and whispered I love you You pulled me closer I snuggled against you loving the feel of your massive arm around me I sighed in your warmth and basked in your protection I said I love you always and forever I closed my eyes to sleep You shifted in the bed and pinned me under you You lifted my slip over my hips exposing my wet womanly essence You groaned as the smell of my arousal filled your nostrils You kissed my lips wanting to taste me I couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t resist you and parted my lips Letting your warm tongue slip inside my mouth As your shaft slipped inside my soul We both moaned in union as the pleasure took on a life of its own You slipped in and out of me slowly driving me insane Stroked me deeper and deeper You filled me completely Your forearms encased my face and you looked into my eyes Watching them glaze over in ecstasy You said I was yours You said I felt good to you You said you would never want another woman You said that I meant everything to you You growled deep within your chest

Look at me you demanded I looked and saw your dark eyes glitter Full of passion…possession…pure love There will never be another man but you You are the epitome of tall…dark…handsome The quintessential alpha male: territorial…possessive…strong…fierce…passionate I moaned I love you You speed up the rhythm Stroking harder…faster…deeper…harder…faster…deeper Your hips moved like a piston Driving into me like I was your only source for survival My mind was gone I felt myself going to the point of no return The little death We went over the cliff together The orgasm was like a damn breaking I spilled my essence and my inner muscles squeezed your shaft You bucked on top of me and I felt your back muscles bunch together Our breaths were shallow Our bodies were dripping with sweat Tremors and shudders traveled between us I moaned your name over and over like a litany You buried your head into the pillow whispering my name Always considerate and thoughtful You moved off of me breaking the intimate connection Laid flat on your back and pulled me to your chest and kissed my forehead You whispered I love you then closed your eyes I lifted my head to look at you Marveling that you belonged to me and I belonged to you I pressed my ear to your heart Kissed your heart then placed my head back down to your chest and fell asleep A fully satisfied and loved woman

THE INTIMACY FACTOR By Archie Cashwell

course. Anyone can go through the motions and have sexual intercourse. Intercourse that is superficial and lacking one important factor; intimacy. Lust is like a drug and will most likely lose its zest once the initial attraction wears off. There is nothing worst than being in a relationship with someone that you can't stand, and your reason for being is he /she is good in bed. You need to realize that pleasure is created in your brain and therefore you are in control of the orgasms that you give men create for. If you learn that it is possible to reach a climax without being touched, you will make better love choices. You deserve intimacy. You deserve a man to give you the details. My Granny always says "If you don't have to work for it, its not worth much." How can a man possibly tell you that he loves you and you believe him, when he doesn't know who you truly are? He knows what's on the surface, he knows your representative. If you want the best sex of your life get to know the person before you lay down and spread your legs. Communication is the solution to any problem. There is nothing wrong with spending hours on the telephone; you did it in High School. There are only two things that can come from getting to know someone better. 1. You find out that you like the person and allow the relationship to progress. Or, 2. You find out the person is not right for you and you move on. Which is still a good thing, you will save yourself a lot of heartache and regret.

Intimacy is a process not a thing. It takes place over time and is not stagnant. In fact, any kind of stagnation in a relationship kills intimacy. Intimacy can also take many forms. One form of intimacy is cognitive or intellectual intimacy where two people exchange thoughts, share ideas and enjoy similarities and differences between their opinions. If they can do this in an open and comfortable way, then can become quite intimate in an intellectual area. A second form of intimacy is experiential intimacy or intimacy activity. Examples of this would be where people get together to actively involve themselves with each other, probably saying very little to each other, not sharing any thoughts or many feelings, but being involved in mutual activities with one another. Imagine observing two house painters whose brush strokes seemed to be playing out a duet on the side of the house. They may be shocked to think that they were engaged in an intimate activity with each other, however from an experiential point of view, they would be very intimately involved. A third form of intimacy is emotional intimacy where two persons can comfortably share their feelings with each other or when they empathize with the feelings of the other person, really try to understand and try to be aware of the other persons emotional side. A fourth form of intimacy is sexual intimacy. This is the stereotypical definition of intimacy that most people are familiar with. However, a this form of intimacy includes a broad range of sensuous activity and is much more than just sexual intercourse. Its any form of sensual expression with each other. Therefore, intimacy can be many things for different people at different times.

There are 14 single women to every 1 single men. The pickings are slim but I guarantee if you desire what the average woman is not thinking about, you will find the right man for you. Know your worth and your patience and efforts will pay off in the end.

We were all taught about the birds and the bees. We know the logistics of sexual inter-

XXX F*** like a Porn Star By Solae Dehvine

Yes, sex is one of the greatest gi s a person can share with their mate and can be an asset to a rela onship. When a woman can totally sa sfy their mate in the bedroom it will make them think twice about messing it up. Now I know some women believe that it will make them stay faithful, but I am here to tell you this is not true. A person chea ng is a selfish act that has nothing to do with the amount of sex or quality. There are many people that get loads of great sex and s ll cheat, there are some that get inadequate amounts of sex and s ll remain faithful. That decision is up to the cheater. That being said, fucking like a porn star isn’t to keep your man faithful. It is simply one of the ways to keep him happy. We all want to make our other half’s happy. Happiness is the main goal in a rela onship, and fucking a man like a porn star will make them jump for joy. The reasoning behind the tle, Carry Yourself like A Lady Fuck like A Porn Star, is to conduct your everyday life like a lady, and to be open to sa sfying your mate and their fantasies. No, I am not saying set up a camera and sell the tapes for money, but what about going that extra mile to fulfill each other’s sexual dreams. If you can’t please and do uninhibited acts with your partner, then who will you do them with? There should be no reason why you can’t open up and have fearless sex with your partner. Being with one person for years can be boring and can take away the thrill of sex. In fact, one reason why rela onships fall apart is boredom. If you fuck like a porn star you can add some spice, a tude, and adventure in your sex life. There are two important keys to making your sex life fulfilling. This is not only to fulfill your mate, but you as well. The first part is communica on and comprehension. The second important part to being happy sexually is not being afraid of the unknown. You have to be fearless to fuck like a porn star. Communica on and Comprehension is the focal aspect of the sex life. Without communica ng your wants and your mate not comprehending what you have conveyed, then the mission will surely fail.

This is why it is important to communicate as o en as possible. It’s like studying for an exam; you go over things mul ple mes to have it ins lled in the brain. When the exam arrives, you are prepared. The same can be said with your rela onship. The more you talk about what makes your mate happy the more you can comprehend exactly what they desire. Now that we communicated and comprehend it’s me to execute. Now that we communicated and comprehend it’s me to execute. Go in the bedroom and fulﬁll every inch of the fantasy. Yes, trying new things can be awkward and for some even a li le scary. Just make sure you keep your mind open and don’t be afraid of new sexual adventures. Remember fear is allocated on the unknown. If you don’t know how or what to do, just remember that everything can be easily learned. Research by popping in his favorite porn, google some sex posi ons, or ask the source themselves how to perform what they are asking for. It’s nothing like ge ng informa on from the source itself. Speaking of ge ng it straight from the source, we asked a few men and women to analyze the best part of their favorite pornography. We deﬁnitely received some mixed reviews but there were a few responses that were repe ve and we made the list below.

Top Porn Star Fuck Tips List of things you can do to fuck like a Porn Star. 1.

Suck Dick like a PRO

You’ve been with this person for a while and you’re giving the same old red head. Or you haven’t changed your technique since you lost your oral virginity. Sorry but you need to step your game up. Ladies, if you aren’t sucking your man un l he has an orgasm then you are being lazy. There is truly a special moment when you suck your man’s dick un l he explodes. There is nothing wrong with nut. Men have no choice whether to taste a woman’s cum, so why not taste theirs. You can spit it out a erward or hell be brave and swallow. Once you do this your rela onship will reach a higher plateau. There is a sense of trust and togetherness that is achieved from sucking a man to the point of ejacula on. **WARNING** Do not swallow everyone’s cum. Sex including oral sex should be done with certain people. Swallowing sperm does leave you vulnerable to diseases. If you are not in a monogamous rela onship then use a condom during oral sex. It can s ll be fun with a condom. Use lubricants to heighten the feeling and ultra thin condoms to increase the pleasure. There are always diﬀerent ways to stay safe. 2.

Go Anal

Again, in my opinion this isn’t something that should be done with everyone. But if you have found that special someone, why not let them get in the back door? All the porn stars do it and trust me it’s 56

a whole new feeling for both par es. Read further on Sexmentality.com about How to have anal sexual experience. 3.

Buy Toys and Use Them

The same old boring sex is just that . . . boring! You’ve seen all his parts and he has seen all of yours. So why not buy some new parts. I don’t care how hard you try but your tongue won’t vibrate. Why not buy a toy that does. There are millions of diﬀerent toys and millions of diﬀerent lubes that can make the pussy ghter or to make the clit ULTRA sensi ve. Why not use what you can buy to get what you want. Porn stars do. 4.

Dress Up

Put on a maid dress or some full body stockings with the holes in it. Can you imagine his dick sliding through one of those holes into your creamy center? A $5 body stocking can give you a night full of pleasure. It’s not so hard to be a porn star . . . and it’s cheap.

Bring in an extra person

Ménage . . . bring in a third person or a fourth or ﬁ h. Hell, have an orgy. But you have to make sure that you and your mate can handle this. **ANOTHER WARNING*** This type of Porn Star play is not for everyone. This has the poten al to breakup rela onships OR it could bring them together. Being a porn star means being uninhibited in the bedroom. Do some things that you don’t normally do. Enjoy your sex life and make it an adventure. While your thinking and carrying yourself like a lady, he wants you to make love to him with the passion and vigor he has only seen in the movies. Act like a lady and be more inven ve in the bedroom. It’s pre y simple. Just be yourself and let loose. Act like a Lady and Fuck like a Porn Star. Enjoy.

Pop in to discuss everything from makeups to breakups and all the details in between As well as the latest current events. We'd LOVE to have you join us on our calls live!. Real talk, Real Raw, All the time! Join us via chatroom: http://www.talkshoe.com/talkshoe/web/talkCast.jsp? masterId=89313&cmd=tc (talkshoe registration required) Or by phone: (724) 444-7444 Call ID: 89313 Please utilize these methods to call into our show FREE! Skype, Cell Phone( If you have unlimited nights and weekends, come join us!) You can also download and install this program for free on your computer to make digital voice calls! Xlitehttp://www.talkshoesupport.com/resources/x-lite-v3-0/ Should you you call from other methods you may incur long distance charges. Using the methods listed above are free for Domestic and International Guests. This podcast is copyright protected and the sole property of Chattin with Candace and Midnite. http://chattinwithcandaceandmidnite.com/ Also find us on FaceBook and Twitter: http://www.facebook.com/ChattinwithCandaceandMidnite 58

Your Tongue Drove Me to Her Tongue By REDD LION

You can wipe the corners of your mouth off now. I’m sure my last article sent you and your significant other into a sexual frenzy. Gentle-men, how many orgasms did your wife, woman, girlfriend, mistress, or ho have? Yes I said ho! Ho’s need love too; just make sure she’s not a side-bar in your relationship. We women are not into sharing. As soon as we find out our man is cheating on us, we might just give him a taste of his own medicine, only our side-bar is a woman. Hold on ladies; don’t get your panties all wet! I’m just trying to let these men know that they can sometimes be the cause of us falling into the arms of another woman. There’s a large smirk on my face as I write this article. Yes, women turn to other women for love, which brings us to the story of Ambrosia and Raynail.

Ambrosia and Raynail have been having a repeated cycle of lover’s spats. Raynail seems to think that it is okay for him to stay out until the wee hours of the morning. The sheets on his side of the bed remain cold, Raynail is never home long enough to keep them warm. His pillow is fluffed, just as he left it. Ambrosia is lying on her back on her side of the bed, she’s beautiful. Her buttertoffee complexion is illuminated by the light from the candles that she used to set the mood. Her shoulder length hair lay like a Chinese fan; above her head and on either side of her face. The knee length, red, satin gown that she was wearing hugged her 5’6” 140lb frame. Her 32 B’s clung to her gown. Ambrosia looked beautiful, as always. Yet her beauty and devotion to Raynail, and a commitment that she had made to him, never having received so much as an en-

gagement ring during their five year relationship, wasn’t enough to make him want to come home to her. Tonight was no different. While lighting the candles, Ambrosia received a call from Raynail that he was not coming home. “I’ll be out with the boys. Don’t know what time I’ll be home, but don’t wait up for me,” he told her. Ambrosia was looking forward to making love to Raynail. She would not have to say a word. Raynail would hear what she was feeling as soon as he walked through the door, courtesy of the Soulsational Isley Brother’s. “My mission is to please you. My aim is to keep you. I’m gonna love you” Raynail would never hear the song. Once again he was going to be out late with his “boys,” which in Morris code meant “I’m

sexing the side-bar tonight, see you in the AM.” Ambrosia had known for years that Raynail was cheating on her. The signs had been there for years. The scratches on his back told a tale. The perfume on his collar reminded Ambrosia of the Michael Kors tester at Macy’s. Raynail would turn his cell phone off when they were in the same room together. The late night partying with his friends, and slipping into the house two minutes before his curfew, a time that Ambrosia had set for him, after finally getting fed up with him staying out until all times of the morning. But like most women, who are either comfortable, afraid to be alone, or who thinks that no one else can hit her…ohhhh…or make her…ahhhh, Ambrosia refused to leave Raynail. After getting the call from Raynail, Ambrosia searched her underwear drawer for a hundred dollar bill with a phone number on it. She first stared at the number, debating on wheth-

er or not she should make the call. This would be no regular call. The voice at the other end of the line would be a new experience for Ambrosia. An intimate involvement with the voice would be considered a sin to many, and a surprise to most, especially Ambrosia friends. But Ambrosia had already set her mind on a series of orgasms. Whether it was with Raynail or with…. Stacey looked down at Ambrosia. The three months of waiting by the phone for Ambrosia to call her had come to an end. Stacy knew as soon as Ambrosia accepted the one hundred dollar bill with her cell phone number on it that Ambrosia would call her. Stacey looked around the room, making a mental note of her surroundings. She walked around the room blowing out the candles and watching Ambrosia squirm around on the bed. “Don’t be nervous,” Stacey said in a raspy voice. “Relax. You don’t have to do anything but lay there.” 60

Stacey blew out the last candle and walked to the foot of the bed. The room was dark, yet she was still able to make her way to the bed…the mental note. Stacey dropped her Rock & Republic jeans to the floor. She pulled down on her cartoon designed boxers, before slipping out of her Juicy Couture T-shirt. Stacey left her sports bra on during sex with eh ladies. She wanted to feel every bit like a man. The ten inch strap on that she kept in her bag of goodies took care of the, hmmm, after all, when a man is with a woman it is his job to please her. Making sure that she experience at least four orgasms before he bust his first…. Stacey reached into her bag of goodies, and removing her strap on, placed it on the floor next to the bed. She crawled onto the bed, between Ambrosia’s legs, and lay flat on her stomach. Stacey spread Ambrosia’s legs apart, causing Ambrosia to take a deep breath. Ambrosia’s body

stiffened. Stacey kissed Ambrosia’s inner thighs.

insist on a quick nutt, before getting Ambrosia off!

“Relax, I’m going to take your mind on a journey,” Stacey told her. Stacey slipped her tongue between Ambrosia’s lips. Ambrosia jumped at the touch. Stacey pressed down on Ambrosia’s stomach and covered Ambrosia’s lips with her mouth. Stacey sucked Ambrosia’s lips. She slipped her tongue between the lips and thumped her clit with her tongue. Stacey sucked Ambrosia’s clit, fluttered her tongue over the head of the clit and licked the inner sides of her lips.

Ladies, does this story sound familiar to you? Gentle-men, wipe that smile off your faces. You are the reason why most women turn to other women. I’ve heard people say that women who indulge in gay or bisexual relationships have mental issues. This is not the case at all. Years of both physical and psychological abuse can cause a woman to turn to another woman for love.

Ambrosia was now relaxed. She knew that it was a woman between her legs, but Stacey’s tongue felt no different than Raynail’s tongue. The touch was the same. The lick was far better than Raynail’s. Stacey’s lick was more intimate. Stacey understood what a woman wanted. She herself knew that a woman needed. Stacey was making love to Ambrosia’s thighs, lips, clit, while Raynail would

Women are able to sympathize with one another. A woman automatically knows what another woman desires, while a man is left with the unemotional task of trying to figure us out. I say unemotional, because a man can date a woman for a number of years without his emotions getting involved. A man has to make time for his woman. He has to understand that she will leave him, and possibly for another woman. The saying, “sticks and 61

stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,” is totally false. Words leave an everlasting impression on the mind, like a bullet on glass. They can either make or break a person, and yelling does not make anyone. Belittling her will not make you the bigger person. Talking down to her will not heighten your “visibility,” you can still go unseen…

unheard of…pride reduced to nothingness after she leaves you for another woman. We women want to be held. When we are in relationship, sharing a home with our significant other, there is no legitimate reason why we should have to go to bed alone. If our significant other is not working a graveyard shift, then he should be at home with us. For every cause, there is an effect. And the effects of you gentle-men not treating your woman with respect can be her leaving you for another woman.

DEAR KITTY Dear Kitty Kitty, I have discovered recently how much I enjoy having my g-spot stimulated. I find it to be very intense and very pleasurable. Sometimes, my partner will stimulate me there for long periods of time. I've noticed sometimes that afterwards, I will be have some rather strong discomfort in that area, especially when I urinate. I will jump a bit as my urine begins to flow, and I feel very tender inside. Normally, this passes within a day. Is this something that generally occurs with extended g-spot stimulation? Thanks, Benn Dear Benn, Well first off I would like to say congratulations on finding your G-Spot. So many women out there have become so frustrated with trying to find it with no results that they have given up on it completely, so again congratulations! Now, I think your problem is the long period of time you said you are stimulated. As you are already well aware the G-Spot responds to pressure applied to it, not just by touch. So with long periods of time being stimulated with fairly intense pressure to the area, I feel you have simply tenderized that area. Also, because the bladder is so close to the pressure applied, I also feel that is your problem with urination. If you are experiencing pain in the urethral area and if pain continues for 7 to 10 days, you need to see your health care provider. My first thought on that issue would be Vulvodynia (Vulvar pain) or Interstitial Cystitis, or even a urinary tract infection... this is not a diagnosis, but simply a few terms you might hear from your provider. Meow Kitty Dear Kitty, I am pretty aroused all the time, but I find that during sex no matter how turned on I feel, my vagina is pretty dry. It causes my boyfriend to think that I'm not attracted to him, but I couldn't feel more turned on! ... and I'm really dry ... I went off the birth control for this reason and was fine for a few months, but it has become a problem again. Is there anything I can do to correct this dry vagina? - Want It Dear Want It, The two most common causes for vaginal dryness are lack of foreplay/arousal and decreased hormone levels. Even if you feel really turned on, it can sometimes take a while for you to get properly lubricated. If you attempt penetration too soon, then it will be uncomfortable which will decrease your arousal level which in turn will slow down your ability to lubricate yourself. 62

If the arousal is not the problem then hormones could be the key. Speak with the person who prescribes your birth control and experiment with different ones. Some can dramatically increase your hormone levels to right where they should be. Don't stop until you find a solution that works the way you want it to. One thing you might consider is a product like Valentra. It will increase blood flow to your genitals which will typically increase lubrication in your vagina. Until you find a solution, try using a good, water-based sex lubricant such as Wet Light and ID Personal Lubricant. Kitty, Meow

Dear Kitty, I am desperate to ask about vaginal farts or a vaginal release of gas. I have been reading about this and answers are always related to sex and intercourse. It has been happening to me in my Yoga class and is really really embarrassing. What can I do about it? It doesn't happen to me during sex, but it happens during exercise. How can I apologize for them? I do not know what to do, and are very embarrassed. - Claudia

Well Claudia, I'm stumped. I've searched everywhere I can think of and you're right, most of the vaginal farts information relates to sexual intercourse and orgasm. In these cases switching positions, avoiding certain positions, and learning to live with it are the three most common cures. Although I did find that vaginal farts are fairly common during exercise and Yoga, I couldn't find any solutions for you. I have one suggestion, but this is just a guess. Vaginal farts seem to occur in certain women based primarily on the shape of their vagina. If you do regular kegel exercises you will develop a stronger PC muscle which will slightly change the shape inside (this muscle will become slightly larger). With a slightly different shape you may find the problem gets better. (After all, women who don't have vaginal farts during Yoga have vaginas that are shaped nearly the same as yours, so a little change might make all the difference). To learn how to do kegel exercises, visit my female ejaculation page at PlaywithDnk.com as I discuss these exercises in detail there. Even if you don't solve the vaginal fart problem, kegel exercises are fun and beneficial.

If any of my readers have a solution to relieve these vaginal farts, please write me and I will post it to the site! At Kitty@PlaywithDnK.com

Dear Kitty, I have a question about my discharge from my vagina. Its kind of a milky white, odorless, stuff. Its very embarrassing. The white discharge from my vagina is very thick sometimes, but very rarely. I have had the white discharge from my vagina ever since puberty. I've been tested for sexually transmitted diseases and talked to my doctor about it but he seems to dismiss me and pretend I didn't ask. Could you help me out, I would appreciate it. Thanks. - Jennifer White and Milky Dear Jennifer White and Milky, With some women, there is an increase in the cervical mucus discharge during times of increased progesterone levels (such as during your menstrual cycle) and with other women there is just more of this discharge from the vagina all the time. In most cases, if it is odorless and tasteless there's nothing to worry about. If you've been tested by your doctor then there's probably nothing physically wrong with the discharge from your vagina. You definitely have nothing to be embarrassed about. Meow Kitty Kitty@PlaywithDnK.com 571.402.2605 1.888.587.2440

1-888-587-2440 AskKitty@PlayWithDnK.com 64

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