Volume 105, Issue 11

Page 1

The Spectator The Stuyvesant High School Newspaper

Volume CV  No. 11

March 23, 2015

“The Pulse of the Student Body” stuyspec.com

Jensen Foerster and Justin Strauss / The Spectator

SING!

By Jonathan Buhler and Blythe Zadrozny

Juniors Zoe Leaf, Rick Melucci, Rose Cytryn, Phillip Chun, and Shannon Lee were chosen as the new Big Sib Chairs on March 3. Excited for the year ahead of them, the quintet has begun to plan new initiatives for their tenure as Big Sibs Chairs. The application process to become a Big Sib Chair is a rigorous affair in itself, as many different parts of a student’s life are investigated. Report cards are examined, and the first round of people are cut based on both attendance and grades. The remaining applicants are then given an interview, which further narrows the pool down. Finally, Little Sibs provide rec-

ommendations for their Big Sibs and the heads of extracurriculars that the applicants participate in are spoken to. People skills are highly valued in prospective chairs, since the Big Sib job is extremely public and communication oriented. “We need people that are really good at being friends, and being able to make it seem like a fun experience, but at the same time being assertive and run the organization,” senior and former Big Sib chair Harmehar Kohli said. That said, the new chairs all fulfill these requirements, with each of their personalities and interests bringing something new to the table. Leaf is an active member of the writing community at

Stuyvesant; she contributes to Caliper (the literary magazine at Stuyvesant), Writing on the Wall, and tutors at the writing center. She described herself as smart, thoughtful, and outgoing—adjectives that were apparent since she was a freshman. “I was probably very annoying but on my first day of freshman year, I went up to five people in each of my classes and said ‘Hi, I’m Zoe! I’m really excited to be here,’” Leaf said. Leaf strives to recreate her experience as a Little Sib for others. She reminisced, explaining that her Big Sibs enabled her to be the cool freshman that greets upperclassmen in the halls, and even recounted having a crush on one of her Big Sibs. Unlike Leaf, Melucci had a hard time describing himself in

Jensen Foerster / The Spectator

New 2015-2016 Big Sib Chairs Chosen

just three words, a characteristic befitting an active member of the Speech and Debate team. Perhaps the most hu-

Turn to pages 9 - 20 for SING! Coverage

S I N G !

morous of the chairs, Melucci is continued on page 3


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The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

News Newsbeat • Nine Stuyvesant students will be representing New York City at the Intel International Science and Engineering Fair (ISEF), having progressed to the Finals Round of the NYC Science and Engineering Fair.

• Principal Jie Zhang received the Asian American Achievement Award sponsored by the Asian Alumni Association of the City College of New York.

Poll: SING! and Schoolwork Compiled by The News Department

During SING! week, teachers are encouraged to lighten up on the amount of homework and tests they plan for their classes. The following poll was conducted to gauge how closely teachers adhere to this suggestion, and how schoolwork affects participation in SING!. One thousand students were surveyed via e-mail; 214 responded. Their answers are below.

��� ��� �� How many full-period tests did you have during the week of SING!? Three 22 (10%)

• The Stuyvesant Model United Nations (MUN) team received the Best Large Delegation Award at the Johns Hopkins MUN Conference. Sixteen individuals also won awards for their performance.

Four or more 25 (12%)

One or fewer 110 (52%)

Two 56 (26%)

• The Robotics Team hosted 28 students from Chinese robotics teams during the week of March 9. Stuyvesant students on the Robotics team were shadowed by the visiting Chinese students, who sat in on classes and toured the school.

• Junior Hayley Gruenspan recently won two writing awards: she was selected as a Writopia Lab Fiction Fellow, and will also have a one-act play she wrote produced at the Worldwide Plays Festival.

• Junior Scott Fairbanks received an Honorable Mention in the Gilder Lehrman Civil War essay contest. He was also selected to be a finalist in the JFK Profile in Courage Essay national essay contest.

• Music teacher Holly Hall conducted the High School Honors Chorus, a collection of musically talented students living in New York City. Hall was accompanied by many Stuyvesant students participated in this chorus as well as in the Honors Orchestra and Concert Band.

• Sophomore Sharon Lin was a national winner in the Massachusetts Institute of Technology Think Competition.

• Senior Laura Wang received the Manhattan Borough Award for the Ezra Keats Book Making Contest for her original book, “Atmosphere.”

How much homework did you receive during the week of SING!? More homework than usual 28 (13%)

Less homework than usual 80 (38%)

About the same amount 105 (49%)

Did schoolwork deter you from participating in SING!?

Other time commitments kept me from participating in SING!: 69 (32%)

Yes 50 (24%)

No: 94 - (44%)

Alumni Association to Initiate New Mentoring Program

By Grace Cuenca and Selina Zou

Sophomores, juniors, and seniors will have the opportunity to meet in small groups with Stuyvesant alumni mentors beginning in the spring 2015 term as part of the Stuyvesant Alumni Association’s Mentoring Program Initiative, which is designed to partner up qualified alumni with current Stuyvesant students to help prepare them for long-term success. The program was organized by Guidance Counselor Harvey Blumm and the Stuyvesant Alumni Association. Prior to founding it, Blumm had been organizing alumni and student mentor/mentee pairs on a small scale. “In the past [...] those who were interested in mentoring contacted me. Eventually, alumna YanJie Hou [(‘06)] helped to organize the idea of a formal recruitment program where mentors and students meet regularly,” Blumm said. Ageneral information session about the program was held on March 5 at Asphalt Green two blocks away from Stuyvesant. Speakers, including Hou, discussed the focus of the program and the application process. Many Stuyvesant students attended the session, and left with a positive impression. “The presentation was very well organized and informative. The speakers were…[able to] relate to us well,” sophomore Victoria Barbalat said. Both students and alumni must apply to be part of this program. Alumni must be college graduates who reside in New York City, while students must fill out a more extensive application explaining their interest in the program and their career focus. The coordinators stress

the importance of individuality over grades in the application. “We simply wish to see what kind of a person the applicant is, and which mentor he or she can be paired with to fulfill his or her dream career,” Hou said. Mentors and mentees will be organized into cohorts based on general career focus: STEM, business, or nonprofit and government. As a semester-long program, meetings will take place four times over the spring term, starting in late March. Approximately 40 groups of mentors and mentees will meet in supervised environments, and meetings will last one to two hours each. Not all applications can be accepted this term, but those not accepted are encouraged to apply again next year. Accepted students will have the opportunity to learn more about their mentor, as well as how to approach the career that they are interested in. The first two sessions focus on developing relationships between the mentors and the mentees, while the last two focus on choosing extracurricular activities and developing résumés specific to the mentee’s field of interest. “Although there [are] only four sessions, it’s enough, because you will have developed bonds with mentors who you can contact even after the program ends,” sophomore Kofi Lee-Berman said. Ultimately, Blumm hopes to lead students on to a successful life after they graduate from Stuyvesant. “[The program] helps Stuyvesant students understand what is involved in success in various careers. They can hear from someone who’s actually done it and see how they themselves can replicate it,” Blumm said.

New Lunchtime Yoga Class at Stuyvesant By Sharon Chao and Jan Wojcik A $950 grant from the Parents Association (PA) has enabled chemistry teacher Samantha Daves to introduce lunchtime yoga classes at Stuyvesant. These classes will be held for the entirety of the spring term every Friday during sixth period in the dance studio. Taught by Bent on Learning, an organization that works to bring yoga into NYC public schools, the classes aim to help students de-stress and be healthier. The yoga classes are led by Bent on Learning instructor Crystal McCreary. Each class begins with a simple exercise that involves students lying on their backs, slowly breathing, and being aware of what they are thinking about. “There [is] a huge focus on breathing; the goal [is] to empty our minds and stop getting distracted,” junior Kathy Wang said. McCreary spends the first half of the class going over the positions that were practiced during in the previous week; in the second week of the program, positions such as the tree, triangle, and downward-facing dog pose were reviewed. The second half focuses on learn-

ing a new series of poses and observing the sensation of one’s current position. At the end, the same breathing exercise from the start of the class is repeated. Currently, there are 35 to 40 students in the class, while more students were interested but weren’t available sixth period. There is no guarantee that the classes will continue next semester. As of now, the grant is enough for one instructor to come once a week for the spring term, only. Future classes, as well as an expansion of the classes to be held more periods, will depend on funding. Students have been receptive to the idea of yoga classes and many are pleased by the effects of the classes so far. “I like the class because I get to close my eyes and not have to think for a moment. It gives [me] time to unwind, something [I] normally don’t have time for in [my] daily life,” sophomore Sherry Dang said. Daves hopes that the benefits of yoga will appeal to a variety of students. “Some students are more focused on increasing flexibility, and others are more focused on using it as time to de-stress,” Daves said. “Each student should take what they need from the class and use the time as best suits them.”


The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

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News Schools Close for Muslim Holidays Starting Next Year By Barnett Zhao, Julia Ingram and Vanna Mavromatis Mayor Bill de Blasio announced on Wednesday, March 4 that New York City public schools will close for two major Muslim holidays, Eid-Al Fitr and Eid-Al Adha, as of the 2015-16 school year. Eid-Al Fitr is a three-day feast at the conclusion of the month of Ramadan, a 30-day period of fasting. Eid-Al Fitr and Eid-Al Adha are both lunar holidays, meaning the date they occur changes every calendar year. For the next few years, Eid-Al Fitr will fall during the summer and will not affect the school calendar. On the other hand, Eid-Al Adha occurs after the Hajj, or pilgrimage to Mecca, and will fall this year on Thursday, September 24.

“It’s nice to have our holiday acknowledged.” —Ali Saad, senior and Co-President of Stuyvesant Muslim Students Association This change was intended to accommodate the approximately ten percent of New York City public school students who identify as Muslim. “Muslim students and their families who observe Eid

al-Fitr and Eid al-Adha shouldn’t have to choose between an instructional day and their religious obligations,” said Chancellor Carmen Fariña in an interview with CNN. “This new addition will also enable a teachable moment in the classroom for our students to learn about religious tolerance and the societal contributions of various cultures.” The 2015-16 school year will begin one day earlier to compensate for Eid-Al Adha. A decision has not yet been made on how to handle Eid-Al Fitr when it falls during the school year. The addition of the holidays Eid-Al Fitr and Eid-Al Adha to the school calendar has raised the prospect of the holidays of other cultures being added as well. Proponents for recognizing holidays such as Lunar New Year and Diwali, the Hindu festival of lights, are putting pressure on de Blasio to add these holidays to the school calendar. “I think it’s culturally insensitive to close schools for other holidays, but exclude Lunar New Year,” junior Sally Leung said. However, further school closings would burden the school calendar and require the additional school days to be added. De Blasio believes adding Muslim holidays was imperative. “This is a common-sense change, and one that recognizes our growing Muslim community and honors its contributions to our city,” said de Blasio in a press conference on Wednesday, March 4. For now, Muslim students are grateful that their holidays are being recognized. “It’s nice to have our holiday acknowledged, to know there’s awareness for the culture and diversity of New York City,” senior and Co-President of Stuyvesant Muslim Students Association Ali Saad said.

New 2015-2016 Big Sib Chairs Chosen continued from page 1

the type of person who speaks his mind (regardless of how embarrassing some of the comments may be), creating ease for any conversation he’s in.

“We need people that are really good at being friends, and being able to make it seem like a fun experience, but at the same time being assertive and run the organization” —Harmehar Kohli, senior and former Big Sib Chair.

Cytryn has had a more unusual track for a Stuyvesant student because she transferred in right before her sophomore year. However, she has adjusted well to Stuyvesant as a member of both the basketball and the softball teams and a writer for The Spectator. She has decided

that she most identifies with a koala, which makes sense, as her friendly nature is clear from only a few minutes of talking to her. She partially credits one of her Big Sibs for her easy transition. “She recognized that I wasn’t as new as a freshmen. I’d already done a year of high school and I just needed a jumping off point,” Cytryn said. Chun has had a more standard track, although he has clearly made it interesting, through participating in extracurricular activities such as SING!, Speech and Debate, and the varsity tennis team. He describes himself as outgoing, sensitive, and dramatic, the latter accentuated by the Ancient Egyptian attire he wore to his interview with us. As have many, he has seen his fair share of awkward moments as a Big Sib, and his experience inspired a few cringes from the others. “So, first semester, I’m handing out report cards to my class, and they’re all asking me how I did on my report card and I was joking around, ‘I only got three U’s [unsatisfactory grades] this semester’ and as I’m giving out the next report card, this kid has four U’s, and I feel so bad about it,” Chun said. Lee also embodies an ideal role model, involved with the Speech and Debate team and Student Union cabinet. She compares herself to a bird, which explains the independent and driven spirit exhibited in the short time we spoke to her. She also doesn’t have to look far to identify with many freshmen just transferring from middle school, as many agree upon her least favorite thing about Stuyvesant. “Least favorite is the work. I wish I had more sleep,” Lee said. The Chairs are excited to start working and improving the Big Sib program, already mentioning a few ideas to help make the Stuyvesant experience better for freshmen. Melucci and Leaf mentioned that they would try to get the word out and make Big Sibs more accessible by expanding their web-

site and providing more time for Big Sibs to interact with their Little Sibs during lunch periods. Chun and Lee provided some more methods for acclimating students to the social environment, proposing more dances as well as a friendly sports event. Cytryn’s suggestion builds upon the program at present, attempting to make it more accessible. “Homeroom is only for handing out forms, it’s the only time we get to see all our Little Sibs at once so we want to have homeroom on a weekly basis,” Cytryn said. However, these ideas are still in the workings, and for now, the Chairs put forward a little of their own advice. They all gravitated towards an idea that seems to apply directly to all of them: get involved. “Try, if you don’t like it, that’s fine. If you don’t try, you’ll never know,” Chun said.

“Try, if you don’t like it, that’s fine. If you don’t try, you’ll never know.” —Philip Chun, Big Sib Chair

Jensen Foerster / The Spectator

Anthropology Lecture at Stuyvesant: Writing and Culture

By Sharon Chao

Linguistic Anthropology professor at John Jay College Dr. Shonna Trinch gave a lecture at Stuyvesant on Friday, March 11 in the library after tenth period. The talk, titled “The Strangeness of Writing: What It Says about Culture,” focused on the origin of writing and how its use in Brooklyn storefront signs reflects cultural changes. Eidos!, the Stuyvesant anthropology club, arranged Dr. Trinch’s visit. “We wanted to offer the Stuy[vesant] community a more engaging connection to the study of anthropology with someone whose work may be

relatable to students and rooted in the modern world,” senior and Eidos! Vice President Hilary Tung said. Math teacher Debbie Goldberg recommended Dr. Trinch and history teacher and Eidos! faculty advisor Lisa Brando reached out to her via e-mail. Dr. Trinch began the lecture by discussing the importance of bipedalism, or walking on two feet, in the development of language and culture. The development of a widened pelvis enabled hominids to give birth to offspring with larger heads and brains. “Bipedalism is absolutely important because it predated human brain size, and large brains are needed for language,”

Dr. Trinch said in her lecture. Although language developed over the course of hundreds of thousands of years, there is no evidence of writing until about 5,000 years ago; human beings have not been literate for most of their existence. Having established the fact that writing is not an innate characteristic and is a relatively new human ability, Dr. Trinch moved on to show how writing is shaped by modern culture. She focused on the writing— word choice, font, and display— used in over 2,000 storefront signs across Brooklyn. The gradual change in style she observed provides a new perspective and method for examining gentrification in Brooklyn. According to Dr. Trinch, there are two main categories of storefront signs in Brooklyn: the pre-gentrification, old-school signs and the modern signs. The older signs have words that cover the entire awning or display. Common characteristics include store names that refer to the owner, extra signage, text that details the products sold, and use of non-standard English. For example, Third St. Newsstand and Deli Inc has 17 words on its storefront sign, including its name and various products sold. The sign also has nonstandard written English—while

parentheses are usually used to mark the area code of the telephone number, the sign uses asterisks. The sign also spells the words “cold cuts” as “coldcut.” These old-school store signs are overly wordy, grammatically incorrect, and, as Dr. Trinch theorized, appealing to the poor for a reason. “Wordy signs make everyone feel welcome: no matter what you want, the stores will help. The message is also straightforward so that a person knows what the store is for,” she said. Meanwhile, Dr. Trinch explained that modern stores have witty and terse names with cryptic meanings that are typically portrayed in all lowercase letters. The store “bird” in Park Slope is an upscale women’s clothing store, but one cannot tell by simply looking at the name. A children’s store, “little hip squeaks,” conveys fashion forwardness and attracts a new wave of parents with its clever name, a play on “pipsqueak.” The differences between the old and new signs hint at a changing population within Brooklyn. New signs assume that customers understand the signs or will resort to the Internet in case of confusion. “One lifelong resident felt like [the store with the new sign] was like a secret club that he didn’t belong to. This leads me to think that the new signs act

as gating devices […] as a public filter to select certain readers over others,” Dr. Trinch said. Brando was pleased with Dr. Trinch’s incorporation of the basics of anthropology into the lecture. “Dr. Trinch provided a framework for her argument with writing being ‘strange’ with regards to its recent development in human history. And, finally, she embedded her research, applying the previous concepts to discuss how gentrification in Brooklyn is evident through signs,” Brando said. Many students found the lecture to be relatable and eyeopening as well. “I loved how it focused on modern times, so I actually could personally relate to the different types of store signs I’ve seen just in my own neighborhood,” sophomore Mia O’Brien said. “I also gained insight into a topic that I never gave much thought to before.” Dr. Trinch will be returning to speak again next year, and she has also recommended Associate Professor of Anthropology Edward Snajdr, who would like to give a talk as well. She finished the lecture by conveying the true purpose of her study in relation to anthropology. “The study of language can reveal who we are,” Dr. Trinch said. “I wanted to show how writing provides clues to the reality of the world that we live in.”


The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

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News

Christopher Liang / The Spectator

CAASS Scanner Introduced in Cafeteria

By Julia Ingram and Raniyan Zaman With the introduction of the new cell phone policy on Monday, March 2, which permitted mobile devices in the cafeteria, students are now required to scan their ID cards upon entrance into the cafeteria. The administration hopes that the scanner will more accurately and efficiently allow students into the cafeteria who have lunch that period. However, the scanners will also act as a foolproof way to prevent students from cutting class and taking advantage of the privilege of being able to use their cell phones in the cafeteria. One reason behind introduction of scanners in the cafeteria is that it is a more accurate way of checking students’ schedules.

Previously, a faculty member would check the programs on the back of students’ ID cards as they entered the cafeteria in order to verify that they had lunch that period and were not supposed to be in class. The Comprehensive Attendance Administration and Security System (CAASS) scanners can do this automatically and without error the same way they do when students scan out to leave the building at the second floor bridge entrance. Increased accuracy in making sure students are not cutting class to enter the cafeteria is especially necessary now that students are allowed to use their phones there. “We want to make sure that students aren’t making a habit of sneaking into the cafeteria [when they have class] to make a phone

call or do something on their phone,” Principal Jie Zhang said. Adding scanners in the cafeteria was also expected to allow an anticipated greater number of students inside faster. “Since students are allowed to have their phones, I think the lunchroom will be more crowded. So because it will be more crowded, I want to make sure we can efficiently get everyone inside and make sure that everyone who’s in there belongs in there,” Assistant Principal of Safety & Student Affairs Brian Moran said. However, in the days after the scanners were added, it became clear that the speed had not increased. “It’s a lot slower than the previous way. It’s not really better,” freshman Yahan Yang said. Sophomore Si Wei Lin agreed. “It’s slower because now you have to wait on line. When there was no scanner, there was a short line, but it moved pretty fast,” she said. The administration is aware of these concerns and is striving to make the process more rapid. “We realized that speed-wise it’s not really helping on coming in, and so we’re working on getting a second scanner,” Zhang said. Free periods have caused another issue with the scanning system in the cafeteria. Since the scanners in the cafeteria and at the bridge entrance operate under the same system, underclassmen are only permitted to scan in and out during their lunch

Donations to New York City SING! Programs Not Expected to Affect Stuyvesant

Helen Jin / The Spectator

SU treasury. “It’s technically the SU’s show because they fund the whole thing, and then they give us back a portion the following year to jump start another show, and then we’ll make more money and then give it back to them. It’s a whole moneymaking scheme,” SophFrosh Coordinator Winston Venderbush said. This system works well, as the gross income of the 2014 SING! production was $57,419.93, while total expenses amounted to $16,870.03. Altogether, the overall revenue of the SING! shows was $40,549.90, a sum close Swift’s donation of $50,000. However, the Stuyvesant SING! program’s apparent financial security is not shared by many other high schools throughout the city, and Swift’s donations are predicted to provide a little more relief for the city’s ailing arts programs.

By Jonathan Buhler and Blythe Zadrozny

The New York City Department of Education (DOE) announced on Tuesday, February 24, that $50,000 has been donated to the public school system by singer and NYC & Company Global Welcome Ambassador Taylor Swift, from the proceeds of her song “Welcome to New York.” The earnings are intended to fund SING!, a program in many high schools throughout the city in which students fully produce and put on a staged production. The $50,000 is a first installment, and it is confirmed that there will be more donations in the future. DOE spokeswoman Devora Kaye says the department is “deeply appreciative” of the donation. Information has not yet been

disclosed on which schools this donation will go to, and how the money will be divided. However, it seems that so far the Stuyvesant SING! program will not be affected. “As far as I know, we [Stuyvesant] haven’t received a penny,” Principal Jie Zhang said. Stuyvesant will likely not be receiving money because the SING! program at Stuyvesant has an already established budget plan. Each grade is allocated a sum of about $1,250 to start with, as well as the $12 per member in SING! dues. Additional money, determined by the grade, the number of students participating in that grade’s SING!, and for specific needs, is given to each grade. Stuyvesant’s SING! program is funded by the Student Union (SU), and both the earnings and the money supplied for production costs come from the

“As far as I know, we [Stuyvesant] haven’t received a penny,” —Jie Zhang, Principal

period, not their free periods. “It works well with the juniors and seniors, because they have the right to go out of the building [during frees],” Zhang said. If the CAASS scanning system was programmed to allow freshman and sophomores to scan into the cafeteria during their free periods, they would be allowed to scan out of the building as well. As a result, when students wish to enter the cafeteria during a free period, they have to show their ID to the faculty member at the scanner. Despite these issues, the addition of scanners has not been met with much resistance. “It’s annoying to have to swipe your ID, but I understand why they do it. With the new cell phone policy, it makes sense,” senior Miranda Tran said. Though no definite plans have been formed, due to the general acceptance of the introduction of scanners in the cafeteria, the administration feels it could potentially be more efficient to have scanners at the entrance to the library as well. “I know that a line builds up outside the library every period, so if we can get the funding and have the resources to put more scanners in the library, it can get students moving more quickly to where they want to go,” Moran said. However, many students felt this would be unnecessary. “I don’t see any reason to have them [in the library], it would just be a waste of mon-

ey. They check the IDs outside so people that don’t have frees or lunch can’t get in anyways,” sophomore Joanna Mei said. Although the new change may require some adjustment on behalf of the students, it seems likely that it will soon be smoothly integrated into Stuyvesant. “I think swiping in isn’t so bad. I don’t think it’ll really affect anything,” freshman Janice Tjan said.

“I want to make sure we can efficiently get everyone inside and make sure that everyone who’s in there belongs in there.” —Brian Moran, Assistant Principal of Safety & Student Affairs

Stuyvesant Hosts a Principal Conference By Jennifer Lee

After Carmen Fariña was named New York City school Chancellor in 2014, more onsite training events for public school staff have been issued. One of the most recent events, a Principal Conference, was hosted at Stuyvesant on Tuesday, February 24, Wednesday, February 25, and Friday, February 27 for elementary, middle, and high school principals, respectively. The meeting was open to only New York City public school principals and consisted of a 90-minute presentation and two-hour breakout sessions. The presentation provided general information about Family Engagement while the breakout sessions, such as the Effective Leadership workshops gave attendees opportunities to focus on honing specific skills. Principal Jie Zhang herself attended the Effective Leadership seminar. “In the break-out sessions, we had the opportunity to reflect on our work and hear how other schools approach challenges and manage really well,” Zhang said. Even though Zhang offered to host the Principal Conference, the DOE staff was responsible for setting up most of the event. Central DOE members brought in dinner, snacks, and instructional guides to distribute to the guests. The Stuyvesant staff, primarily Zhang, Assistant Principal Organization Saida Rodriguez-Tabone, and the technology department, was responsible for setting up the presentation and testing the equipment. The only obstacle encountered was finding rooms unoccupied by SING! participants. Overall, the event was perceived as a success. Almost half of the principals of the city’s approximate 1,600 public schools

attended the three-day event. “It’s good to have the opportunity to meet [with other principals], share ideas, and offer mutual support. While specialized high school principals do meet frequently, there’s a great deal that we can learn from the principals of other high schools,” High School of American Studies at Lehman College Principal Alessandro Weiss said.

“I think [the conference] was very effective… We had the opportunity to reflect on our work and hear how other schools approach challenges and manage really well.” —Jie Zhang, Principal


The Spectator ● March 2, 2015

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The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Page 6

Editorials Staff Editorial

The Spectator

Healing our School’s Health Class As a basic tenet of life, mental and physical health are essential to the well-being of all people. It seems almost self-evident to state that health should be a priority, both for students at Stuyvesant and those responsible for their well-being, but the reality is that health often plays second fiddle to our other commitments. Take sleep habits— many students at Stuyvesant will routinely sacrifice sleep for the sake of schoolwork or other obligations. In doing so, we neglect the importance of a good night’s sleep. According to the National Heart, Lung, and Blood Institute, “After several nights of losing sleep—even a loss of just 1–2 hours per night—your ability to function suffers as if you haven’t slept at all for a day or two.” Luckily, at Stuyvesant, as well as at many other high schools, we have a system designed to help people: our guidance counselors. However, many of the students who are most overwhelmed are the ones who have the least time to go discuss their mental health with their guidance counsel-

Our Health Education class is required for all juniors, but is currently inadequate in its role of helping students.

ors. Moreover, each guidance counselor has upwards of 200 students to help, and the system can often be impersonal. As such, this burden logically falls to the other system we have in place: the Health Education class that is required for all juniors, but is currently inadequate in its role of helping students. The first and most immediate issue is that by the time students are given the opportunity to take Health their Junior year, many have already been exposed to sex, drugs, and alcohol. Even if the lessons are taught adequately, they are presented too late. It is likely for this reason that the Department of Education already suggests that students take Health class in the ninth or tenth grade—as opposed to the current Stuyvesant policy. It is the position of this board that the class should be taught to freshmen—14 and 15 year olds, in other words— rather than to16 and 17 year old juniors. Empirically, this suggestion

holds weight. In a survey of approximately half of the school’s English classes conducted in November 2013, The Spectator found that many students will

As it currently stands, Health class can—ironically enough— actually hurt the health of those who take it, as projects and tests and quizzes force us to stay up working for our grade.

try marijuana or get drunk for the first time during their sophomore year; introducing them to healthy protocols beforehand might ensure safer habits. Freshman year is also the time that many students will be developing their work habits and learning to cope with newfound challenges and hurdles, especially given what is often a difficult transition from typically easier middle schools. Teaching freshmen the benefits of sleep, of proper nutrition, and of mental health can aid them in managing those struggles. Not least, the change would help alleviate the stress of junior year, a nine month span of time full of anxiety over grades and standardized test scores. Moving health to freshman year would allow for one more free period either first or sec-

Health should be a destresser, a period to learn and take a breather during the day.

ond term of the year, relieving some of that pressure. And on the other hand, freshmen, with their limited access to electives,

have free periods to fill and wouldn’t be significantly affected by the addition of a class like Health to their schedules. Most crucially, the idea of the Health Education class as a whole needs to be reformed. As it currently stands, Health class can—ironically enough— actually hurt the health of those who take it, as projects and tests and quizzes force us to stay up working for our grade (health is averaged in just the same as math or English). Regardless of whether it is moved to freshman year or not, Health should be a de-stresser, a period to learn and take a breather during the day. And while obviously there are grades that need to be formulated, in general the methods to do so should be more specifically tailored to the needs of the student body. Quite simply, in a class that seeks to promote healthy living, grading students on their ability to spend the night memorizing the precise location of the endometrium from both a front view and a side one is counterproductive. There should be a greater focus on learning the health skills that most Stuyvesant students need: time man-

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It is the position of this board that the class should be taught to freshmen—14 and 15 year olds, in other words—rather than 16 and 17 year old juniors.

agement, how to deal with simultaneous academic, social (and romantic) obstacles, and how to face insecurities and occasional bouts of despondency or dejection. Health can’t be treated like any other academic class: outside of the fact that in the end there needs be a grade (preferably one based on attendance, class behavior and attentiveness, and a few long-term projects), its teachers and even more so, the administration need recognize the onus already on Stuyvesant students. In order for it to achieve its objective—ensuring the mental and physical health of the student body—we call for a structural reform to the support system of health education.

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• In Issue 10, “Dr. Greenwald: A Historian’s Story” was incorrectly attributed to Claire Jin. Rather, Fionna Du wrote it with Geena Jung.


The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Page 7

Opinions

By Ryan Boodram Three years ago during summer vacation, Drew Sterret, a student at the University of Michigan, received a call from his school requesting a Skype interview to discuss an unspecified topic. Sterret was informed during the interview that he was being investigated for raping his friend, identified in court documents as CB. He was also told that if he ended the call to consult a lawyer, it would be noted and the investigation would proceed without him. This cryptic Skype call was his only interview. The evidence for this accusation contained testimony from witnesses who gave statements contradictory to those of CB. Although Sterret was able to provide testimony from his roommate, who was present at the time, showing that the sex was consensual, it was ignored. He was found guilty and has been suspended from college until July 2016. Sterret’s case against the university is just one of over, according to the New York Times, 36 such cases in the last three years. Sadly, shoddy procedures like this are the norm when it comes to investing college rape on college campuses. The lack of formality is shocking; standard legal procedures, such as cross-examination

and the barring of hearsay, are usually ignored. Like Sterret, the accused are often prevented from consulting a lawyer. Instead, a university administrator usually investigates these cases without their input. Even though campus courts lack the legal safeguards of

All forms of sexual assault should be taken seriously, but there is a problem when policies are being made based on inaccurate information. an actual court, schools still use preponderance of the evidence to guilt, meaning that accused rapists can have their lives permanently altered if there is even a slightly greater chance that they committed the crime than that

they did not. Ironically, the system doesn’t even work if the accused is guilty: then, he or she is merely expelled from the college rather than arrested as would befit a rapist convicted outside college walls. Harvard recently joined a national trend when it adopted a system so unjust that twenty-eight members of its law department, including three professors emeritus, wrote an open letter protesting the school’s new procedure for investigating rape as lacking “the most basic elements of fairness and due process.” Why then, are schools even investigating rape themselves in the first place, let alone using such unjust systems? The answer lies with federal education law Title IX, which protects against gender based discrimination in education. The U.S. Department of Education began using Title IX in 2011 to force schools to comply with its rape investigation guidelines. By including measures such as the prohibition of cross-examination, these federal standards go far to protect the rights of the accuser, but do little to protect the rights of the accused. Since non-compliance with Title IX can result in a school losing its federal funding, universities have been quick to comply with federal standards. As the Harvard professors wrote,“[l]ike many universities across the nation, Harvard acted under pressure imposed by the federal government..” The pressure to use Title IX to combat sexual assault comes from the oft-cited statistic that one in five women will be raped by the time they graduate college. This statistic is misleading, as it relies on unrepresentative data. The study, conducted by RTI International, came from a survey of only 5,466 college females at two universities, out of the approximately 12 million college females in the United States. As the lead author of this study admitted,, the

data does not represent the whole country. The Department of Justice tells us otherwise. Its study, uses a far more representative sample of over 160,000 people, showing that 0.6 percent of college females reported sexual assault. Even though most sexual assault cases go unreported, the number is surely nowhere near 20 percent. Sexual assault should be taken seriously, but there is a problem when policies are being made based on inaccurate information. It is clear that something needs to be done about the way rape on college campuses is handled. Colleges should not be investigating allegations of rape. Instead, the police should investigate cases and alleged rapists should be tried in a court, where proper legal procedure will be followed and appropriate action can be dealt. Rape is a very serious matter and should be handled as such. For this change

to occur, the Department of Education needs to stop extorting colleges with Title IX. These changes do not mean colleges should stop helping rape victims. Instead, they should focus on providing counseling to students who have been raped, on helping them to negotiate the psychological trauma that comes from being raped and on aiding them pursue legal recourse. Rape is a heinous crime, but allowing colleges rather than courts to handle this serious issue only diminishes its value. It is also important that we do not forget that there will always be innocents among the accused, and that they deserve justice along with rape victims. It is imperative that we uphold the American ideal that everyone is entitled to due process of the law. Otherwise, we may just be exchanging one injustice for another.

Yujie Fu / The Spectator

Tanumaya Bhowmik / The Spectator

College Rape 101: It’s the School’s Fault Too

The Death of the American Left By Asher Lasday Hilary Clinton is far from liberal. Though she has convinced many Democrats otherwise, her actions are indicative of the party’s slow shift towards moderate and even center-right politics—the

The Democrats need to expand their liberalism to confront the growing conservatism within the GOP, and moderates aren’t the ones to take on that task.” death of the American left. While Franklin D. Roosevelt was quick to get the nation back to work during the Great Depression

with the New Deal, there has been no similar push from the Obama administration during the recent economic downturn. This is surprising, as creating jobs would have been a simple matter of basic reforms, such as improving America’s atrocious infrastructure. In fact, though most modern Democrats call for a more equitable division of wealth in America, they frequently enact counterintuitive tax policy, such as cutting programs rather than raising taxes—a fairly conservative approach. The source of this shift is primarily former President Bill Clinton’s actions in the ‘90s. At the time, Clinton believed that the most effective way to win public support was to appear moderate in comparison to the far left. In terms of policy, however, that formula is no longer applicable. The Democrats need to expand their liberalism in order to confront the growing conservatism within the GOP, and, as the Democratic Party becomes more moderate, it is less apt to take on that task. Hillary Clinton is an example of this growing moderation, as she has consistently taken relatively conservative positions within her party. She has become a rallying cry for many liberals, despite be-

ing far more interventionist than she is given credit for. Brookings Institute fellow Robert Kagan, who has been described as neoconservative, has called her foreign policy in line with his views. Further, she has all the same Wall Street ties as Jeb Bush, making it unlikely that she will seriously reform Wall Street. So why are Democrats settling for Hillary? Likely because she’s well known. She’s been in the White House before, and is no stranger to D.C. politics. She is also able to provide a superficial appeal to many through the media, focusing less on her center-right policy, and more on the possibly of being the U.S.’s first female head of state. But if the Democratic Party wants to make meaningful change moving forward, they’ll need to liberalize the left. By taking advantage of successful local left politicians, such as Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders, and introducing them to the nation via presidential elections, Democrats have an opportunity to decenter their party. Sanders, a social democrat, shares views with ruling parties in Sweden, Denmark, and many other Scandinavian countries. However, he identifies as a capitalist, and still supports the basic ways in which the U.S. economy currently

functions. A large portion of Sanders’ vision is a single-payer, government-funded health care system. This would allow the government to purchase drugs, implants, and other medical necessities from various pharmaceutical compa-

If the Democratic Party wants to make meaningful change moving forward, they’ll need to liberalize the left.

nies for a lower cost. The effect of the single-payer system can be seen in countries that have implemented it in the

past, including Spain. While the cost of a hip replacement in the U.S. is $40,364, in Spain, that same surgery is $7,371—over five times less expensive. Sanders also prioritizes ending free-trade relationships. He argues that the detrimental effects of outsourcing, including competition, outweigh any benefits that new markets can provide. Though cheap products are nice, if consumers don’t have jobs, price reduction isn’t a sufficient solution. American workers, who have long been without a friend in the White House, should appreciate Sanders’s proposals. He calls for a higher minimum wage, more laws protecting unions, and, most importantly, worker co-ops (companies that are fully or partially owned by individual employees). These reforms, if passed, would result in higher wages, improved living conditions, and a more secure workplace. These changes may seem radical, but they aren’t novel. These are the ideas that the Democratic Party used to value: helping the working class, protecting the citizen—promoting equality. Unfortunately, while, globally, liberal parties have continued on this path, U.S. liberals have been left behind. Sanders is a way to catch up.


The Spectator â—? March 23, 2015

Page 8

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SING! 2015 The Stuyvesant Spectator

Photos By Jensen Foerster, Justin Strauss, and Jin Hee Yoo / The Spectator

March 23, 2015

TABLE OF CONTENTS REVIEWS 10 - 11 Soph-Frosh SING! 14 - 15

Senior SING!

18 - 19

Junior SING!

SCOREBOARD 12

Scoreboard

TOP FIVES 16

FEATURES 17

PHOTO ESSAY 13

The Cast of Senior SING!

Top Fives

The Queen of SING!: Leslie Bernstein Number of Laughs During SING! HUMOR

20

SING! Review Despite Best Efforts, Seniors Win SING!


Page 10

The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Soph-Frosh SING!

Misfit Toys of Soph-Frosh By Daniel Kodsi and Ariel Levy

Two upsets in two years? No way. But that was the word in the theater leading up to Saturday night’s performance of SophFrosh SING!: it was looking like the underclassmen were going to beat the Juniors. And without point deductions, they would have—putting on a performance that trounced most expectations for underclassmen performances. Indeed, it was a thoroughly enjoyable production that soared on the merits of its dances, acting, and overall script.

The Drummerman’s persistent bouts of word vomit, episodes of increasingly rapid and aimless speech, were delivered with jittery ferocity.

The plot followed a core group of misfit toys, including the confident but flat-haired Troll (sophomore Michael Holmes), adorably awkward but squeaky Ducky

(freshman August Murphy), an exclusively positive 8-Ball (freshman Travis Tyson), the anxious Drummerman (sophomore Emily Ma), a tangled Slinky (sophomore Evan Lieberman), and an excessively cynical Teddy Bear (sophomore Dennis Ronel). After being ridiculed by a group of Barbies (sophomores Elizabeth Lawrence, Kate Sherwin and Jessica Sparacio) and their leader, former-Ken-Doll-turned-Barbie (sophomore Alec Dai), the defective toys banded together on a quest to get fixed, meeting friends, foes, and ex-lovers along the way. Ma delivered one of the best performances of SophFrosh SING!, both vocally and dramatically. The Drummerman’s persistent bouts of word vomit, episodes of increasingly rapid and aimless speech, were delivered with jittery ferocity. This, combined with her nervously stiff marching and drum tapping in the background of each scene, provided consistent comic relief during the show. Ma’s brilliant solo during “I Will Survive” was another highlight, an exhilarating series of uplifting notes conveyed through her strikingly clear voice. Ronel was another standout performer, capturing his character with a jaded but lovable grouchiness. Delivering many of his lines (“This starry-eyed ‘Anything Can Happen’ approach […] makes me want to gorge myself on my own stuffing!”) with aplomb, Ronel, and the Sophfrosh screenwriters, managed to turn Teddy Bear, who could have been simply a jerk, into a multifaceted character. Ronel’s powerful singing was clearly showcased during “Gives You Hell”, a music battle between Teddy Bear and Troll—but alas, Teddy Bear’s personality remained the same afterwards as it was before. Murphy also excelled as Ducky, excellently conveying her character’s awkwardness and

discomfort. Her duet with Bath Toy queen Octavia (sophomore Nadia Filanovsky) was charming, with Murphy possessing the better vocals of the two. Along with the rest of the crew, she seemed to possess a real character arc, growing more positive about her defect as the show progressed and in the end accepting her squeaking as part of who she was.

Johnston truly inhabited her role, delivering her lines with creepy glee and wonderfully exaggerated hand gestures.

Though her time on stage was brief, Ouija (sophomore Kate Johnston) created one of the most memorable scenes of the show with her delightfully predatory performance. Johnston truly inhabited her role, delivering her lines with creepy glee and wonderfully exaggerated hand gestures. Her frightful, echoing shrieks punctuated the scene’s dialogue and her odd flirtations towards the 8-Ball both earned many laughs from the audience. Of the rest of the cast, Lieber-


The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Page 11

Soph-Frosh SING!

SING! Impress the Competition man earned more than a couple laughs with his overwrought love for Holmes’s character, Holmes added charisma as group leader and the only one really willing to push the gang to their limits, Tyson provided additional comic relief (especially in his interactions with Johnston) and freshman Garrett Hall made a great appearance as a Yoda Furby, telling off Ronel for his bad attitude. Freshman Holden Higgins, too, in his brief entry as a poorly-wrapped mummy, delivered one of the show’s best disses with panache, mocking Junior SING! (“[J]ust look at us! I’m wrapped in bad scripts and poorly written jokes.”). Though the SophFrosh SING! plotline was simple, it elegantly integrated several engaging dance performances, with each dance crew uniquely portraying a different department of toys at the factory. The contemporary crew, representing marionettes, was one of the most impressive in all of SING!. Graceful leaps, daring flips, and thrilling lifts more than compensated for the occasional uncoordinated movement among the dancers and captivated the audience from start to finish. Sophomore and director Enver Ramadani deserves special mention for his beautiful and elegant performance. Both hip-hop crews also deftly executed exciting choreography. Boys’ Hip-Hop portrayed robots, with jerky and well coordinated moves accompanied by a superb guitar solo from sophomore Jean Joun. Girls’ Hip-Hop impressed as well with inventive choreography. Pulsating lights at the beginning of the dance added to its haunting effect. Step was another notable dance, filled with a variety of fast-paced beats that were cleanly performed. The end of the performance, when two

crew members were lifted, aimed, and fired like rifles, was one of the best dance finales in the show. The SophFrosh flow (formerly rave) performance contained ambitious elements, including a performer in a rotating hula-hoop and a spinning kick to extinguish a glowing balloon. While flow was not always able to perfectly execute these challenging moves, their choreography was nonetheless the most creative out of any flow crew in SING!.

The scenery was salvaged by the art crew’s beautiful background, a subtle but lovely portrait of several factory chimneys billowing over a misty sunset.

Unfortunately, the underclassmen’s technical aspects couldn’t match their strengths elsewhere. A drab, grey, staircase provided the backdrop for the entire show, a stark contrast to the excitement onstage. The performance was also plagued by poor transitions (though not as aimless as those in Ju-

nior SING!) between scenes, resulting in extended periods of awkward darkness. Sound and lighting both underwhelmed as well, often causing moments of discomfort for the audience and the actors. The scenery was salvaged by the art crew’s beautiful background, a subtle but lovely portrait of several factory chimneys billowing over a misty sunset. SophFrosh SING! costumes, also significantly embellished the production. Drummerman’s detailed uniform, complete with giant wind-up handle, and Ducky’s bouncing midriff simultaneously attracted and amused the audience. The show’s closing scene, though cliché (to be fair, admittedly so: “Here’s to another cliché ending for SophFrosh SING!” Ronel yelled at the end), still managed to be heartwarming due to a moving monologue from Dai. While earlier parts of his performance conveyed a confident and self-assured diva, he spoke about his struggles with self-identity and gender with genuine poignancy. This dramatic transformation from his judgmental earlier persona, inspecting toys and discarding the misfits, seemed unrealistically sudden. However, it was still one of the most affecting and well-received moments in SING!. With distinctive characters, engaging acting, bold dance performances, and minor flaws, SophFrosh SING! was an impressive production. According to judge scores, it surpassed or matched Junior SING! in all categories except for Band (where it was but two points short), Sets, and Tech; SophFrosh SING! deserved a second-place finish. Next year’s seniors could face a considerable challenge if the Class of 2017, stacked with talented performers, continues to build on its show quality.

Photos by By Jensen Foerster and Soham Ghoshal


The Spectator â—? March 23, 2015

Page 12

SING! Scoreboard FRIDAY

Overall Impression Script Acting Dance Band/Orchestra Vocal Musical Elements Sets Technical Aspects Costumes Total Total (Scaled)

Soph-Frosh

Juniors

Seniors

49 42 45 54 46 50 42 36 50 414 460

43 39 40 41 48 45 52 43 42 393 437

57.5 50 55 55 54 61 56 51 47 486.5 541

Soph-Frosh

Juniors

Seniors

56 49 55 56 55 52 50 45 54 472

54 52 57 51 55 53 60 53 59 494

75 66 66 68 64 71 76 65 64 615

Soph-Frosh

Juniors

Seniors

105 91 100 110 101 102 92 81 104 932 -43 889

97 91 97 92 103 98 112 96 101 931 -21 910

132.5 116 121 123 118 132 132 116 111 1156 -28 1128

SATURDAY

Overall Impression Script Acting Dance Band/Orchestra Vocal Musical Elements Sets Technical Aspects Costumes Total

OVERALL

Overall Impression Script Acting Dance Band/Orchestra Vocal Musical Elements Sets Technical Aspects Costumes Total (No Point Deductions) Point Deductions Total


The Spectator â—? March 23, 2015

The Cast of Senior SING!

By Jensen Foerster

Page 13


Page 14

The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Senior SING!

Mythology, “Mawwiage,” and By Kachun Leung and Johnathan Rafailov with additional reporting by Danielle Eisenman Featuring a same-sex couple, a girl in Boys’ Hip-Hop, a boy in Belly, and an entirely new dance crew, Senior SING! promised, if nothing else, to be different from past SING! performances. And different it was—but the seniors offered more than just a refreshing breath from the clichéd characters who seem to reincarnate year after year to fit new themes. Wrapped in the green glow of an Enchanted Forest, Senior SING! redeemed itself from its three consecutive losses and gave a charming performance, complete with a funny script, passionate songs, and upbeat dance crews. The show started off with a bang—the chorus enraptured the audience as it walked onstage from the aisles, singing the “Glee” version of Creedence Clearwater Revival’s “Proud Mary.” As the Murray Kahn Theater was temporarily transformed into a church galore of gospel music, audience members could not help but clap along to the melody sung by the chorus: “Married, married. Now they’re gonna get married.” The curtains opened to reveal a backdrop of elaboratelypainted trees resembling the texture of real forestry. Front and center stood three pairs of swing dancers whose joviality set the mood for the subsequent scene under the altar—the marriage ceremony between Tinker Bell (Jasmine Thomas) and Valerie Oak (Harmehar Kohli).

The show’s opening implied that it would be a “happy ever after” kind of tale, but after the joyous song ended, the evil Fairy Godfather (Sean Fitzgerald) interrupted the wedding and cast a spell that would destroy the forest, and Valerie Oak along with it. Senior Step then entered the stage, representing the thunderstorm that signified the onset of the spell. Beginning with a number of standard dance moves, Step quickly progressed into a fast paced rhythm and made use of increasingly complex steps. In the dance’s end, some members of the crew sat in the front and banged drum sticks. This topped off the song and provided for a clean transition into the next scene, during which the basis for the plotline was established. The remainder of Senior SING! was a romantic adventure story. Tinker Bell and Valerie Oak, accompanied by a gang of six storybook characters—Grumpy (Thomas Perskin), Fawn (Franco Caputo), Gnome (Chloe Long), Hungry (Denis Valyuk), and Little Red Riding Hood (Gabrielle Giles)—traveled through the forest in search of the Fairy Godfather, hoping to convince him to reverse the spell. Unlike many SING! performances featuring stories of romance, this year’s production stood out as the only one with a non-heterosexual couple. This decision was extremely well-received by the audience, and Kohli and Thomas proved to be fantastic fits for their characters. Kohli’s performance of Valerie Oak was especially no-

table, as she convincingly portrayed the physical deterioration of her character. But what stood out most from Kohli— and, arguably, from the entire show—was her rendition of Hoizer’s “Take Me to Church.” Accompanied by the synchronized spins and lifts put on by the Contemporary dance crew, Kohli delivered a passionate portrayal of Valerie’s love for Tinker Bell. Her solo was accompanied by six the members of the chorus and their melodic hymns added a bittersweet feeling to the song. Thomas rendered Tinker Bell’s never-ending care for Valerie Oak in an equally heartwarming fashion. Always standing by her lover’s side, but occasionally getting frustrated with what seemed like Valerie Oak’s imminent death, Thomas was able to capture all of the dimensions of her character. Her solo, an adaption of Sam Smith’s “Stay With Me,” was one of Senior SING!’s most magical moments. Thomas’s exquisite vocals were underscored by glow sticks that members of the audience waved in the air, and the song perfectly captured the tragic yet optimistic aspect of Tinker Bell and Valerie Oak’s relationship. Thomas and Kohil displayed the romance between Tinker Bell and Valerie Oak very nicely—the duo frequently held hands on stage absentmindedly, and wrapped their arms around each other with the thoughtless desperation often seen between couples. The kiss between Tinker Bell and Valerie Oak at the end of the show was an exciting culmination to the romance which had


The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Page 15

Senior SING!

Magic Enchant Senior SING! been building up throughout the performance. Another standout actress was Fia Hargil, whose hilarious embodiment of the eccentric witch added comedy and vitality to Senior SING!. From her entry onto the stage screeching “Salagadoola mechicka boola bibbidi-bop” to her quirky rendition of Meghan Trainor’s “Lips Are Moving,” almost everything Hargil said provoked instantaneous laughter from the audience. The supporting actors and actresses offered as much talent as did the stars. The crew (or, as Hungry liked to call it, the “squaaaa”), consisting of himself, Grumpy, Fawn, Gnome, and Little Red Riding Hood, offered multiple hilarious personalities. Hungry, in particular, provided endless comic relief for Senior SING!. Enacting a caterpillar who finally acquires wings at the end of the show, Valyuk delivered each of his lines with flair, and his not-so-subtle references to illicit drugs never failed to make the audience laugh. Another comedic highlight of the night was the seniors’ use of a “Bad Transition” poster to mock the unnatural transitions used by Soph-Frosh SING!. The two holding the poster were quickly led off the stage by Grumpy, insisting that the poster was not needed because their production “actually had a script.” While the seniors had an undeniably strong script, a minor flaw in their performance came during the turning-point scene, when Grumpy, Fawn, Gnome, and Little Red Riding Hood song-battled with the Fairy Godfather and managed to reverse the spell destroy-

ing the forest. The vocals of the group in their rendition of “Smooth Criminal” were strong, but the fast lyrics were hard to understand at times, and this scene left some audience members confused as to how, exactly, the spell was reversed. Any other small dilemma in senior SING! was more than compensated for by the dance crews. One noteworthy group was Girl’s Hip-Hop, which played a pack of wolves that pursued Tinker Bell and her friends. The multifarious choreography never resorted to the standard butt-shakes and hair-flips often seen in Girls Hip-Hop performances, and the addition of jumps made the crew all the more exciting to watch. But what managed to surpass the dance moves themselves in Girls’ Hip-Hop’s performance was their costumes—the dancers were clad in grey and black, and wore dark gloves with lights shining from them. The dance was bookended by the entire crew gathering in the center of the stage, swaying back and forth with their hands over their eyes with the lights on their gloves representing the wolves’ eyes. This portrayal of wolves left little room for confusion, and the clear thought put into the way the crew fit into the plotline was characteristic of all of Senior SING!’s dances. Belly performed “Naughty Girl,” vocally accompanied by LJ Caputaje. The spice and flavor with which Caputaje sang Beyoncé’s trademark song was astounding, as its rare to hear a male singer reach the high notes Beyoncé is able to strike—his vibrato voice and

vocal range were treats for the audience. As elves who distributed gifts to the actors onstage, Bhangra/Indian offered a uniquely non-American flavor. The smiling crew, led by Anmolpreet Kandola, bounced and clapped to Arun Sivan’s magnificent singing and Albert Oh’s beatboxing. Sivan’s upbeat voice complimented Oh’s beatboxing, and the crew’s rhythmic dance provided an interesting twist to the dance moves showcased by other crews. Dancing to the 1956 swing classic “Jump Jive an’ Wail,” Senior Swing provided an exciting ending to the show. Performing during the last scene—when Tinker Bell and Valerie Oak are finally able to get married— each pair in Senior Swing had its own moment in the spotlight as it moved to the center of the stage to show off a trick. The lifts, flips, and twists were very well executed, and each pair seemed to out-do the one preceding it with an even higher lift or toss. This resulted in many missed heart-beats as the audience members awaited a calamity, but Senior Swing’s long practice hours proved to be well-spent as none of the ambitious acrobatics resulted in an injury. With Senior Swing’s upbeat music, the seniors closed their show on a high note. Despite the show’s somewhat rushed resolution, the performance remained overwhelmingly creative and new. After Valerie Oak and Tinker Bell finally finished their wedding ceremony, one would think there could be little to improve on such a wonderful ending except for with a well-deserved victory by Senior SING!.

Photos by Soham Ghoshal, Justin Strauss, and Jin Hee Yoo


Page 16

The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Top Fives

1. Senior Swing Senior Swing capped off Senior SING!’s performance with jubilant dance moves that made the audience feel as if they were in the Roaring ‘20s. The movements

were risky—but proved to be rewarding—featuring solos from each pair of dancers and enthralling the crowd in the process. Not to mention, they perfectly meshed with the swing solos of the Band’s big horns. 2. SophFrosh Contemp With both fluid and stiff movements and blank, penetrating facial expressions, the marionettes portrayed by SophFrosh Modern staged an eerie yet captivating performance. Featuring gymnastics skills, a short duet en pointe, and impressive lifts, the talented group brought a refreshing twist to past contemporary dances. 3. SophFrosh Girls Hip-Hop SophFrosh Girl’s Hip-Hop seamlessly executed a chilling routine, blending the fiery movements of hip hop with the eerie state of voodoo dolls. The sheer power that pulsed underneath the limping yet curiously electri-

fying forms sent shivers through the audience and was met with resounding applause. 4. Juniors Boys’ Hip-Hop Dressed as mummies, Juniors Boys’ Hip-Hop executed a sharp dance routine. They made good use of the large stage, as the crew regrouped into various formations throughout the song. The impressive jumps and flips added to the crew’s success. 5. Senior Step Senior Step, an impressive compilation of rhythmic stomping and clapping, grew in volume and complexity as their number progressed. Beginning with a small group of dancers, the performance swelled to include all its crew members, eventually utilizing the different levels of the stage as well as drumsticks and an elaborately crafted network of beats. Honorable Mentions : SophFrosh Boys’ Hip-Hop

the audience breathed contented sighs of relief when Kohli was once again able to project her awe-inspiring voice through crouching below a microphone attached to the stage. 3. Bhangra, Arun Sivan and Albert Oh, Seniors This performance of North Indian (typically Punjabi) singing and dancing was very special. Arun Sivan’s distinctive voice and Albert Oh’s beatboxing complemented the crew’s rhythmic dancing, and their synchronization and musicality truly made Senior SING! unique. 4. I Will Survive,

Emily Ma and Travis Tyson, SophFrosh Boosted with humorous affirmations from an encouraging 8-Ball, Emily Ma’s vocals soared, taking us on a musical journey of epic proportions. 5. Smooth Criminal, Seniors This rendition of Michael Jackson’s popular, fast-paced song created an atmosphere of heightened suspense, which was further exaggerated by Sean Fitzgerald’s husky voice. Honorable Mentions: Gives You Hell (Soph-frosh), Blank Space & Royals Mashup (Juniors)

Songs 1. Naughty Girl, LJ Cabutaje, Seniors Senior LJ Cabutaje added an unbelievable amount of sass with his solo in Beyonce’s “Naughty Girl.” The sexy flair and vibrato voice with which Cabutaje belted the lyrics exquisitely complemented Belly’s sensual moves. 2. Take Me to Church, Harmehar Kohli, Seniors Kohli’s solo was—as goes the cliché—a show-stopper. Her honeyed, silvery voice resonated across the auditorium, breathing life into her magnificent performance. Even with a broken microphone during the Saturday show, Kohli powered through and

Jensen Foerster / The Spectator

Actresses

1. Harmehar Kohli, Valerie Oak, Seniors From the moment she walked on stage, Harmehar Kohli captivated her audience by embodying (rather than merely acting) the role of Valerie Oak. Through her melodious singing and enchanting stage presence, Kohli deliv-

Jensen Foerster / The Spectator

1. Dennis Ronel, Teddy, SophFrosh Portraying a cynical Teddy bear, Ronel provided endless comic-relief for the SophFrosh show. He captured his character perfectly, always offering the negative perspective on his predicament, and managed to deliver his comical lines completely seriously. 2. Jordan Foster, Pharaoh, Juniors Foster, playing an exuberant, emotionally immature pharaoh in Junior SING!, added a muchneeded spark of energy to the show. His lines, though few in number, were delivered with confidence and sass, giving the audience a break from the somewhat monotonous plot. 3. Sean Fitzgerald, Fairy Godfather, Seniors A charismatically maniacal Fairy Godfather was portrayed by Fitzgerald, whose puffed out chest was just as inflated as his character’s ego. The magnitude of his character’s sense of self was just as

great as the performance itself. 4. Denis Valyuk, Caterpillar, Seniors Not-so-bright. Lovable. SQUAAA. Such are the words that come to mind when one thinks of Valyuk’s performance as a hungry catepillar-ish creature (who really cares?). Nearly every line was delivered with flair by Valyuk, and his comedic timing and voice were perfect, proving Valyuk to be an audience favorite. 5. Alec Dai, Trans Barbie, SophFrosh Clad in a skirt and a flowing mane of blonde hair, Alec Dai delivered a performance that was both light-hearted and meaningful. As a transgendered barbie doll, Dai managed to convey a crucial message of empowerment while appealing to the audience’s sense of humor. His last line, a touching reminder about self-love and respect, was met with rousing (and thoroughly well-deserved) applause. Honorable Mentions: Mark Abiskaroon, Menat, Juniors

Costumes ered a charming performance that left the audience pleasantly delighted. 2. Fia Hargil, Witch, Seniors The thin tonality of Hargil’s voice made her sound like a rickety old woman, giving her interpretation of the witch character in Senior SING! the vibrant sense of realism necessary to bring the fairy tale to life. 3. Jasmine Thomas, Tinkerbell, Seniors Stunning as always in a spritely fairy dress, Thomas’s performance as senior SING!’s Tinkerbell was heartwarmingly genuine. When she opened her mouth to sing or speak, the audience leaned forward, worried they might miss something. Beyond her captivating stage presence, Thomas showcased impressive talent, and her acting choices, especially in scenes with her counterpart, Koh-

li, were unaffected and moving. 4. Kate Johnston, Ouija, Sophfrosh Though her time on the stage was minimal, Johnston effectively captured the audience’s attention with her startling shrieks and expressive lines. Her impressive depiction of Ouija gave a new sense of vitality to the SophFrosh show and provoked many laughs from the audience. 5. Emily Ma, Drummer Man, SophFrosh Far from displaying a rigid, robotic personality, Ma was a vibrant addition to the SophFrosh cast. Even though she was constantly ushered offstage by her toy companions, her commendable persistence and optimism truly reflected the theme of the SophFrosh performance.

two girls is a daring choice, but both Kohli and Thomas handled it with such grace that few in the audience could find reason for controversy. The delightful resolution brought by their kiss was incredibly touching—a fitting end to a beautiful story. 2. Lights in Stay With Me When members of the audience revealed their glow sticks during Thomas’s already-beautiful rendition of “Stay With Me,” the song gained a new heartwarming essence and conjured many “wow”s and “aw”s from the crowd. 3. Selfie Stick with Moran After having been mercilessly insulted earlier in the show, Assistant Principal Brian Moran showed his humorous side by sneaking into a selfie with the cast of Senior SING!, confiscating said selfie stick, and then taking a selfie of himself. The scene brought

many laughs from the audience, and essentially summarized Mr. Moran’s existence in Stuyvesant. 4. Lorenz Vargas’s Existence Swaying in the background of SophFrosh’s chorus and rocking a gospel choir robe better than everyone ever has, sophomore Lorenz Vargas gave every last human being on earth something to beam about. With jerkily graceful enthusiasm and a whole lot of spunk, Vargas quite possibly stole the show with his minimal, but groundbreaking presence. 5. Transgender Barbie’s Speech Wow. Can you smell that? It’s the smell of the 21st century, with a groundbreaking development in SophFrosh SING! as Barbie was revealed to be a transgendered character. On a serious note, the monologue delivered about acceptance and loving one’s self, while a bit cheesy, was still touching.

Honorable Mention: Kelsey Watts, Cleo, Juniors

Moments

1. Seniors’ Kiss For a high-school performance to feature a kiss between

Justin Strauss / The Spectator

Actors

1. Duckie A yellow, paper mache body, accented with neon orange tights and Tim Burton-esque makeup, blended nicely with the vibrant colors of the SophFrosh cast. The costume was held up by elastic suspenders, allowing it to bob adorably when Augie, the Freshman sporting it, walked. 2. Ouija Ouija’s costume, meant to be reminiscent of a Ouiji board, was covered in golden letters and styled after a short steampunk dress. Clever makeup designs added subtle touches of color to the black and white outfit. 3. Senior Girls’ Hip-Hop The lights attached to the senior girls hip-hop crews’ gloves enabled them to convincingly impersonate wolves, and the costumes stood out from the relatively simple attire most other dance crews were dressed in. 4. Drummer Man Dummer Man, robed in a bright red shirt and metallic golden leggings, accented with swooping tassels and a fraying top hat, drew the eyes of many watching SophFrosh SING!. The best part of the costume, however, was the

makeup—with a frightening nutcracker mouth painted onto her face, Ma’s outfit was a showstopper. 5. Egyptian Princess Portraying the Pharaoh’s sister and protagonist of Junior SING!, Kelsey Watts wore a cream gown and a ruby red robe which allowed her to fully take on her role as a member of the ancient Egyptian royal family. Her golden shambles and heavy makeup further accentuated the glory of the costume.

Disses

Jokes

1. Seniors’ “Bad Transition” poster 2. “Just look at us! I’m wrapped in bad scripts and poorly written jokes.” —Mummy (Holden Higgins), SophFrosh 3. “Well, we did find this bag of fairy dust, so the seniors might have been here!” —Djehonty (Rachel Dalal), Juniors 4. Lily: “Did he… shrink? *squeezes cheek* Aw, he’s so cute!” Grumpy: “No… I think we turned him into a freshman.” Jasper: “Aww, c’mon little guy, let’s get you on over to SophFrosh.” (Seniors) 5. Brendo: “They look lost, like a bunch of those whatchamacallits…” TRIXIE: “Freshmen?” (Seniors)

1. Brenda: “It’s a rhetorical question you moran.” Fairy Godfather: “It’s pronounced moron, moron.” Brenda: “Same thing!” (Seniors) 2. “SIKE! Das da wrong spell!” —Witch (Fia Hargill), Seniors 3. “How can mirrors be real if our eyes aren’t real?” (Seniors) 4. “I am Yeezus! Oh, and to Hathor, Goddess of Music and Whatnot, imma let you finish, but Beyoncé had one of the best music videos of all time!” —Pharaoh (Jordan Foster), Juniors 5. Menat: I will tell of the day of the Festival Dedicated to the Goddess of Motherhood and Music. Yuya: Ms. Hall? (Juniors)

Jensen Foerster / The Spectator

Jin Hee Yoo / The Spectator

Dances


The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Page 17

SING! FEATURES

The Queen of SING!: Leslie Bernstein By Claire jin and Andrea Ma You are sitting in the theater among hundreds of other students, anticipating the start of the annual SING! production. The lights dim as everyone begins to applaud. The heavy blue curtains are swept aside to reveal a beautiful set onstage, signaling the beginning of the show. Without the hard work backstage, the beautiful scene that you first witnessed behind the curtains would not have existed. Whether it was a moving platform, a set of stairs, or even a small crate in the corner, the SING! tech crew spends long hours and hard work into putting it all together. Before the actual shows, tech crews from all grades could be seen on the first floor, rushing into a colorful room in the back of the theater. The first things one sees upon entering the tech room are the walls and floors splattered with paint, and the miscellaneous tools that lie on the shelves. Further into the room, there’s a wide space at the end which holds all the creations of the tech crews. In the back of the room, there’s a door on the right that leads to the back left of the stage. Beyond that door stands a little round table, on which is seated art teacher and SING! coordinator Leslie Bernstein, ready to help with anything that the students might need. Though the SING! set is largely designed and completed by the students, Bernstein plays an important role as the faculty advisor of all three tech crews. Bernstein guides students in making final set decisions, and she helps them maintain a safe

working environment. Her main responsibilities are to mentor and provide commentary on the students’ work. “[The students] design and assess themselves, and I ‘yay or nay’ to their designs and I’m there to help them see their vision. I’m just there to help them with the technicalities of building things and to make sure things are safe,” Bernstein said. Bernstein started helping out with SING! 12 years ago as the Soph-Frosh faculty adviser. In addition to overseeing the entirety of SophFrosh SING!, she helped the tech group alongside technology teacher Robert Rosen for many years. The production of SING! has remained relatively uniform throughout the years, but Bernstein insists that constantly meeting new people and getting to know them makes each year’s experience different for her. While SING! season is stressful for all its participants, Bernstein is certainly no exception. “It is a pretty big headache for me, to be honest,” she said. “[There]’s a lot of time spent here, and I’m the only one doing this side of the job. So while that’s all going on, I’m definitely huffing and puffing along the way.” Students often share pieces, or work together, to reduce the amount of work that needs to be done, but certain accidents may happen. For example, sets may fail or fall apart, sometimes even resulting in dangerous situations. If a piece of the set were to fall off during the show, it would have to be put back up. The more dangerous incidents are often the most prominent memories in Bernstein’s mind. In fact, she goes out of her way backstage to ensure

that accidents like these do not happen again. Bernstein described an example of an accident that remained in her mind from previous years, which involved a set of moving stairs. The speed at which they moved did not match the speed of the girl that was walking on them, most probably because she was nervous on stage, and she fell off the stairs. Although there were no major injuries, Bernstein has used this experience to make sure her students are safe and protected, while still enabling them to have fun with their productions. Inspired by her students’ tendency to not think before attempting something that might potentially be dangerous, Bernstein developed a way to advocate safety to “Techies,” the name she calls her tech crew members. “So I started to think about using posters that made them think about what they were doing before doing it,” she explained. It was coincidental that at the same time, one of her artist friends had painted a picture of her; Bernstein decided to contact her and ask if the portrait could be made into an image with the caption “WWBD” (What Would Bernstein Do) written across it in big, bold white letters. Encouraged by senior Anne Duncan, Bernstein allowed the message to be printed onto t-shirts instead. These shirts, worn on performance days, now act as constant reminders for students in the Tech crew to think “What would Bernstein do?” before attempting possibly dangerous activities. “It’s really funny to have me and my hair on about 70 kids’ shirts.” Always having fun with her “Techies,” Bernstein has

come to recognize the immense artistic talent that her students possess, and sometimes becomes a little jealous of the natural-born talent that certain students are blessed with. “Stuyvesant students are all like little Da Vincis walking through these halls,” she exclaimed. Bernstein appreciates that SING! provides an ideal environment for students to explore their creative abilities after an intense workday. Everyone is engrossed in creativity, putting their academic minds to rest, to crank up their artistic visions. Bernstein’s favorite part of SING! is performance night, when the tech crews’ hard work is exposed to the audience. She loves the excitement that fills the air, and the positive vibe that radiates from the students as they’re performing. “When I watch the rehearsals I have a pretty hard time figuring out what they are all trying to do, and then when I see the show, I go, ‘Oh, that’s what was going on!’” she said. Near the end of the production, after weeks of hard work, Bernstein always grows a bit emotional. The extra effort to participate in SING! is worth it to her because of the students’ willingness to collaborate with one another. She is greatly inspired by the students’ dedication and diligence, as well as their artistic potential. Sophomore Oak Aung, one of the directors of Tech, enjoys the friendly environment that people share backstage during SING!, despite the incredible amount of work that awaits them every day. The freshmen and sophomores are generally new to the idea of creating their own production; however, they always work to the best of their abil-

ity and put together a show that reflects their talent. By senior year, students generally have a solid grasp on the creation of sets. For senior tech director Andrew Fischer, who has been director for three consecutive years, the crew has given him the opportunity to meet new people who share the same interests as him. Fischer is also a part of the tech crew for Stuyvesant Theater Community (STC) productions. Through his successes in all of the tech crews, he uses his experiences from his earlier years to help the younger students with their sets. Tech has also allowed him to become closely acquainted with Bernstein, whom he has never had as a teacher, and would otherwise never have become close to. As a teacher, she likes to tell Stuyvesant students to “follow their heart and their dreams,” as the cheesy saying goes. As for personal finance, Bernstein had her own advice: “There are many jobs in the art world that give you money so you won’t have to be a starving artist. If art is something you are truly passionate about and love, the money will come,” she explained. “But if you’re miserable in a job, you will never do well or succeed. And who wants to be miserable?” She likes to remind herself and students to look at the world and notice that almost every aspect of it is designed or created by someone. “All these buildings, advertisements, and many other things are created by someone. There are jobs out there for that,” she pointed out. Indeed, the sets of SING! were made by Stuyvesant students too.

Number of Laughs During SING! Compiled by Ariel Levy and Johnathan Rafailov

On Friday

52

42

70

SophFrosh

Juniors

Seniors

On Satuday

64

42

53

SophFrosh

Juniors

Seniors


Page 18

The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Junior SING!

Clad in White and Gold, By Ariella Kahan with additional reporting by Emma Loh “Welcome to ancient Egypt,” crooned junior SING!’s chorus in their opening number, an adaption of “XO” by Beyoncé. “Travel down the Nile,” the chorus continued, harmonizing to the vocals of chorus directors Sunny Chen and Joyce Lee. As the chorus gathered in the front of the stage, members of Step, Girls Hip Hop, and Belly entered the stage, dancing along to the song in their respective styles. The audience was pleasantly entertained, and this gentle beginning set the stage for junior SING!—an adventure through the palaces, rivers, and temples of a glittery ancient Egypt. Once the song ended, the chorus and dance crews shifted to the sides of the stage, and the main characters entered. Dressed in costumes that were convincingly “ancient Egypt” but otherwise not particularly impressive, members of the royal household chattered for a bit before the Royal Priest (chemistry teacher Michael Orlando in Friday’s show and physical education teacher Howard Barbin in Saturday’s) strode to the spotlight and “took attendance,” as a way of informing the audience that the Pharaoh was missing, or in the teacher’s words, cutting class. Once the Royal Priest established that the Pharaoh

was missing, junior SING! was set in motion: Pharaoh’s sister, Cleo (Kelsey Watts), the royal musician Ménat (Mark Abiskaroon), and palace guard Yuya (Philip Chun) embarked upon their expedition to find the Pharaoh. While a few scenes shifted back towards the royal palace and dealt with the goings-on there, one of the Pharaoh’s advisors, Djehuti, contrived a scheme to become the new Pharaoh. The most memorable moments took place during the trio’s search for the missing Pharaoh. While the lack of a romance suggests that junior SING!’s script strayed from clichés, the often-seen adventure tale ultimately failed to offer anything new. And even though many of the characters seemed to be lacking in distinguishable personalities, the performances of a few actors and actresses saved the show and brought a sense of vitality to the ordinary storyline. Watts’s depiction of Cleo, Pharaoh’s sister, was particularly impressive. Elegantly dressed in a white gown and red cape and adorned with golden jewelry, Watts commanded attention onstage with her wide gesticulations and grandiose lines. Watts managed to make her audience sympathize with her character as she traversed Egypt looking for her brother. But Watts’s true talent lies in her singing abilities. Her duet with Abiskaroon, a mash-up of “Blank Space” and “Royals,”

was a highlight of the juniors’ performance. Watts managed to hit all the high notes, and her smooth voice provoked shouts of approval from the audience. Abiskaroon’s performance was also very pleasing, and the duo succeeded in taking on the ambitious feat of combining two songs with vastly different melodies in a duet. Another notable actor was Jordan Foster, who portrayed the Pharaoh himself. He only entered the story about twothirds of the way through the show, but this late entrance proved to be beneficial to the juniors’ performance— Foster’s comical depiction of the Pharaoh conjured an abundance of laughs from the audience, and saved the show from becoming dull near its ending. Foster’s best moment came at the end of his first monologue, during which he mimicked Kanye West’s impromptu speech the Grammys: “Oh and to Hathor, Goddess of music and what not, Imma let you finish, but Beyoncé had one of the best music videos of all time!” Additionally, while the function of Thoth (Antonia Stefanescu), was unclear (she seemed to be both a narrator and later deus, literally, ex machina), Stefanescu managed to turn this confusing character into an important part of the juniors’ show. Always entering the stage with a puff a steam to accompany her, Stefanescu embodied Thoth’s mystical presence,


The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Page 19

Junior SING!

Junior SING! Dazzles and expressed her lines is a mysterious sing-song fashion that lent a unique element to the show. Stefanescu’s solo in “I Feel the Earth Move” was also a welcome addition to the performance, especially memorable because of saxophone player Joydeep Baidya’s on-stage musical interlude. Many of the show’s highlights came through the talent of the juniors’ dance crews. Although many of the crews came in somewhat randomly—in Step, for example, the fact that the crew was meant to represent a sandstorm was lost on some members of the audience—the crews themselves were all terrific. Despite its confusing entrance, Step was one of the most coordinated and attention-demanding dance crews of the performance. The ordinary costumes were not representative of Step’s moves, as the large crew overtook the stage from the aisles and stomped, clapped, slapped, snapped, and spun in nearperfect synchronization. In one exciting moment, the crew broke up into groups of three and one member of each trio did a backward roll while the other two slapped each other’s hands, forming a bridge. However, many audience members remembered director Peter Samuel’s solo in last year’s SophFrosh SING! and were disappointed to find that Samuel did not solo in this year’s performance. Another audience favorite

was Belly. Though Belly is typically an all-female crew, the presence of Dennis Yatunin brought a sense of novelty to the show. Yatunin did not allow his lack of feminine curves to hinder his performance, and so shook his body alongside all the female members of the crew—an addition that provoked cries of approval from the crowd. Junior SING!’s band was another strong point of the show. Accompanying every song with beautiful instrumentals, the relatively small band, directed by Noah Amick and Tyler Small, effectively entranced the audience. The band proved its versatility through the wide variety of songs it produced—from the drum and guitar pairing in the Boys Hip Hop’s “Turn Down for What” to the more exotic sounds in “XO,” the band excellently complemented every performance. And while various elements of junior SING! seemed to be lacking in continuity, the band wove the performance together and were a reliable source of talent throughout the show. While it remained static for the majority of the show, the juniors’ set was admirable. A tall platform, painted white and beige to resemble ancient Egyptian temples, stood at the back of the stage, and staircases led down to the ground on both of its sides. Hanging behind the staircase was a beautiful backdrop that depicted a sunset-in-the-

desert scene. Tall pyramids were painted on its sides, and the picturesque sunset was complete with a wide range of colors. Though the chorus members periodically used the staircase to fit on the stage without impeding on the performers’ territory, the main actors and actresses did not utilize the set to its full potential and rarely climbed up or down their grand staircase—a decision that restricted the degree to which the characters could move on stage. Another somewhat clunky addition to the set was a large wooden table, on which golden objects were placed. The table allowed the audience to easily differentiate between scenes in the desert and scenes in the Pharaoh’s palace, but it did not allow for clean transitions between scenes—members of the Tech crew were forced to awkwardly step on stage to remove and return the table to and from its position. But even with these downsides, the juniors were able to play to their strengths and offer an interesting, modern look at ancient Egypt. Through the pleasing performances of certain actors and dance crews, and strung together with the help of its band, junior SING! ultimately succeeded in spinning the vast lands of Egypt into a compelling show that kept the audience engaged throughout its 60-minute runtime.

Photos by Soham Ghoshal Justin Strauss, and Jin Hee Yoo


Page 20

The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

SING! Humor

SING! Review By Dennis Nenov, Daniel Goynatsky, and Gary Buiso SophFrosh The ragtag ensemble of SophFrosh SING! was incredible if you’re looking for... an amazing performance that bores... absolutely no one in the audience! That last sentence was quite the emotional rollercoaster, wasn’t it? Well, so was the heart-racing, cardiac-arrest-inducing, and redundant as “more mummies?!?!” performance of the two underclassmen grades, and for all the right reasons. We laughed as the 8-ball said “Definitely”; we cried ‘Oh My Rah’ as the 8-Ball said “Indeed”; and, finally, we grimaced as the 8-Ball said “Rightfully so.” SophFrosh took a big risk by attempting to make the audience feel the emotions of the characters—confusion and stress. They made up for this flaw with skillfully painted signs that colorfully dictated the path the gang was embarking on. One read “Metal Toys” and one even read “Mystical Toys.” That’s literally 12 letters that were carefully chosen, traced out, and painted—showbusiness in a nutshell, for you. A cynical bear, a tin man, a scary stuffed figurine, a wicked and manipulative Barbie, and a loveable squeaky girl all created an odd parody of The Wizard of Oz. The star of the show, however, was sophomore Lorenz Vargas, who took his role as Background Dancer #23 incredibly seriously. His hips shook more than those of the dancers Belly, his legs jived more than those of the couples in Swing, and his facial expressions changed more than those of the cast members. Junior Ancient Egypt has a long legacy of power, success, and creativity, something the juniors sort of channeled in their performance. While set in the past, the show began with a throwback to the future by referencing the “fairy dust” that junior Henry Takizawa would later consume during the SING! AfterParty. Other compelling performances came from Antonia Stefanescu, who played Girl with Beak on Forehead and masterfully narrated the play through her hotboxed section of the stage, and from Dennis Yatunin, who managed to seduce the crowd with his suave male belly-dancing. Another strong point of Junior SING! was its band, which performed authentic Ancient Egyptian Jazz during the long black-outs that occurred as the tech crew took up half the show’s allotted 55 minutes to move a table on and off stage, often doing so in the middle of a scene just for the Ra of it. “The darkness symbolized how time didn’t exist back in the day,” said cast member Jeremy Elkayam who had lost track of time himself and appeared in his scene 16 minutes late. Many, however, were upset over how the scriptwriters chose to portray Ancient Egypt. “Frankly, I found the portrayal of the Sphinx incredibly offensive,” authentic Ancient Egyptian senior Saifeldeen Zihiri said. “Everyone knows that the Sphinx is a woman who speaks with a nasally British accent.” The scriptwriters contend that this was done on purpose as a “humorous” reference to last year’s offensive Junior SING!, which managed to unite hundreds of upperclassmen and underclassmen through its lack of tact.

Senior After critics of last year’s junior SING! called the performance racist for having the two black actors play a mime and a not-so-bright-yet-loveable Dumbo, this years’ SING! decided to completely challenge the tainted history of their theatre with some more conservative casting choices. This year, Jasmine Thomas played a lesbian fairy, and Darien ‘Thomas Perskin’ Cox portrayed a not-so-bright-yet-lovable Brendo. What probably struck the audience immediately (other than Sean Fitzgerald’s incredibly good looks #Miami98) was the amazing set. But what probably struck the audience immediately after that was the fact that two women were getting married. The Seekers, the Christian club, began throwing pages of the Bible onto the stage in what turned out to be the first musical number of the performance, singing “Take Me to Church” while angrily pressing crosses onto the backs of Thomas and Harmehar Perskin Kohli. After Kyler Chase, along with backup from Assistant Principal Brian Moron “Moran” Perskin, tackled the no-good Christians offstage, the show proceeded as normal, with Kyler continuing to speak as he normally would in any class. Moran, who continued to make appearances on and off the stage, made another appearance, confiscating a selfie-stick, but not before the stick captured his new profile picture. The caption read “Pregaming for SAP with the homeskillets <3333. PC: Francoco. CC: Mom, Vicky Chen, Ms. Mazzurco, and Ms. Perskin.” The show, however, received mixed praise from critics. “From what I can tell from the three-minute clip that I saw, the show was a complete failure, especially compared to Wagner’s Der Ring des Nibelungen and the movie Cars 2,” famous theatre critic Natan Zamansky said. “Form should dictate style, and it was pretty clear to anyone watching who had half a brain that style was the dominatrix here, just completely controlling form.” Other critics disagreed with Zamansky’s review. “Natan never took into account the lights, which are the most important part of the show,” Light Director and jaw model Lauren Sobota said. “Without my slow fade from 50% to 25% on the D8 light, the kiss scene wouldn’t have felt right.”

Despite Best Efforts, Seniors Win SING! By SCOTT MA Senior Coordinator Emily Ruby was stunned when the news of Senior SING!’s victory first reached her. “That’s impossible,” she reportedly stammered, leaning against a wall for support. “There’s no way that can be right.” Ruby, who headed her grade’s SING! production, presided over what she hoped would be the first instance in which a graduating class placed last in the competition for four consecutive years. Over the course of the 43-year history of SING!, everything from a SophFrosh victory to the collapse of the Soviet Union have occurred, but never, says Ruby, had seniors faced failure of such great magnitude. In a public statement given some hours after the unexpected outcome, Ruby issued a formal apology to the graduating Class of 2015, citing a “gross miscalculation of [other grades’ abilities].” “We thought that by wait-

ing until the weekend before our performance to begin painting our set and actually teaching choreography, the

“We have once again underestimated the incompetence of SophFrosh SING!, and for that I am deeply sorry.” —Emily Ruby, senior and coordinator underclassmen would surely defeat us,” she told reporters. “We have once again underestimated the incompetence

of SophFrosh SING!, and for that I am deeply sorry.” Executive Producer Isaac Gluck echoed her sentiments. “We drew inspiration for our production from the 114th United States Congress,” he said, citing “poor attendance, low approval ratings, gridlock, and ineffective leadership by privileged socialites seeking primarily self-gain.” “Despite all that, not only did we win, but we did so by a 208-point margin,” Gluck added. “It’s incredible.” The senior leadership was further nonplussed by how both other grades, despite the wealth of potential plot ideas presented to them, went alongside seniors in choosing to have their stories centered around a ragtag group of adventurers going on a quest. “By not tackling any meaningful societal queries, we thought we were leaving the door open for other grades,” script writer Maria Kollaros said. “Our quest was for love; SophFrosh’s for acceptance

by peers; I’m not even sure what the juniors were looking for, but at least SophFrosh ad-

“Our quest was for love; SophFrosh’s for acceptance by peers; I’m not even sure what the juniors were looking for, but at least SophFrosh admitted that theirs was cliché.” — Maria Kollaros, Script Writer mitted that theirs was cliché.” “I’m also unsure what point SophFrosh was try-

ing to make by throwing in a transgender antagonist, two probably homosexual protagonists, and enough poor sexual references to write another Fifty Shades sequel,” she added. “It almost felt like they were trying to one-up us.” Looking back, Ruby admits that had she known how terrible the other grades would be, she would have taken more drastic measures to ensure a fourth-year loss. “A few of the directors we appointed turned out to be more committed and effective than we imagined they’d be,” she concedes. “There were probably a few instances in which a little sabotage could have helped.” At press time, seniors were suppressing their disappointment by collectively assuring themselves that winning SING! was what they had wanted all along.


The Spectator â—? March 23, 2015

Page 21

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Page 22

The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Arts and Entertainment Food

Hunt for Macarons List of Participating Stores

Bisous, Ciao. Macarons 101 Stanton Street New York, NY 10002 (212) 260-3463 235 Bleecker Street New York, NY 10012 (212) 675-6366 www.bisousciao.com

Jessica Wu / The Spectator

Bouchon Bakery Bouchon Bakery at Time War ner Center Ten Columbus Circle, Third Floor New York, NY 10019 (212) 823-9366

Cupcakes are delicious, but they are often too rich and large. Cotton candy brings a nostalgic taste of childhood, but it dissolves and disappears in your mouth too quickly. If you want a heavenly balance, meet macarons. They’re sweet, meringuebased French confections that resemble hamburgers, except with biscuit-like tops and a filling, usually of jam, buttercream, or ganache. The origin of these snacks is unclear; some say there were created in the 1700s in a convent, while some also speculate that visiting Italian pastry chefs were responsible. Whatever the origin, macarons were unexpectedly popularized by two nuns known as the “Macaron Sisters,” selling a primitive version of the cookies to pay for their housing. In the 1830s, these simple cookies evolved into what they are today and made their way on top of dainty plates worldwide. The only downside to these sublime pastries is the exorbitant price. However, one day each year, you can sample some for free, thanks to renowned chef Francois Payard. Payard, who left his family’s bakery in France to own several in New York City, organized the first Macaron Day in 2010 to spread the “Jour du Macaron” tradition from France. This year, the sixth annual Macaron Day takes place on Friday, March 20, with 26 participating bakeries. Not only can you treat yourself to a sample of this French delicacy for free, but you can also splurge with a clear conscience since profits from the macaron day’s sales will go toward City Harvest, a food charity. If skipping school to find every participating venue in the city is not an option for you, you can satisfy your macaron craving in a few well-chosen shops near Stuyvesant. Mille Feuille If homework hasn’t let you sleep for days, Mille Feuille’s sunset-colored macarons will give you the blissful feeling of finally sinking into bed. In a bite of a roseflavored macaron, the pink shell gives way to a soft, pillowy, soufflélike center, and upon hitting the creamy filling, your bite lands in a perfumed, ultra-sweet dream. The passion fruit macaron strikes a tropical balance between puckery and sweet, while the lemon macaron’s flavor is too difficult to grasp: it is the type of vague dream that slips away quickly. These macarons are not perfect circles but aesthetically beautiful and bright nonetheless.

Greenwich Village, Mille Feuille’s closest location, is where Parisian pastry chef Olivier Dessyn started the bakery. It’s a cute, modern, simply-adorned shop with seating. The central decorations are the food, the color-popping macarons and the artistic baguettes framed on the window. Its eponymous dessert is a cake layered with cream and puff pastry. A box of four macarons costs $10.90 for when you desire more than your free one, and the playful packaging makes it an adorable gift. Francois Payard Bakery (FBP) One of Francois Payard’s shops is right across from Shake Shack; once you enter, you will feel obliged to hold the macarons delicately while pretending to be at a high tea. The macarons are perfect circles in jewel colors, and the experience of eating them is thrillingly unfamiliar. They lack the thick, cake-like texture that is in many macarons. Instead, the shell is textured, easily-cracked, and volcano-like; it’s a dramatic setup for the filling. The flavor erupts in the middle. Cassis Violet is the most unusual macaron flavor there, and its bright taste evokes the Rococo style of art, luxurious and floweriness. More standardsounding flavors—dark chocolate, pistachio, vanilla, and coffee— actually provide an equally novel experience. The chocolate, for example, surprises with bitter hints provided by cocoa powder dusted on top. There is another Francois Payard three blocks away from the Greenwich Village Mille Feuille. Macaron Cafe Conveniently located just off Chambers Street, across from Washington Market Park, Macaron Cafe can easily be spotted during the walk to school. This location has opened within the last year, but the legacy of this store is extensive. There are two stores in Midtown and one on Upper East

Side, and the stores are nearly impossible to miss—it is very tempting to peek inside the adorable, elaborately decorated store that shines, bragging of its macaron tree, a conical decoration made by gluing fake macarons. The interior is just as squeaky clean, decorated tastefully. A colorful giraffe immediately welcomes the customer upon entering and leads him or her to the counters, displaying rows of macarons baked to perfection. The amount of detail in the macarons is truly evident as the tops are decorated with subtle glitter. Not only does this cafe offer macarons, but salads and sandwiches are available if you want some substantial food to munch on while drinking coffee. Although the macarons are on the more expensive side, they are also a bit bigger than average macarons, and therefore are completely worth the buck. You will definitely leave the cafe holding their list of macaron flavors, already choosing others to try at a later visit, such as lemon, dark chocolate, pistachio, and espresso. Typical flavors such as raspberry may be the most popular, but there are also more peculiar flavors such as “Rose,” “Fourth of July,” and “Raisin Rum.” There are also some macarons that are the combinations of two flavors, such as the dark chocolate raspberry, which has one dark chocolate top and another raspberry top. These macarons are slightly chewier than most and have thicker, richer fillings which account for the perpetual crowd in the store. The people who pronounce this French dessert seem to quite divided, with neither converting to the other side. Still, whether you pronounce them as “macaroons” (which are an entirely different type of dessert) or “macarohnes,” one thing is indisputable: you need them to complement a perfect meal.

Bouchon Bakery at Rockefeller Center One Rockefeller Plaza New York, NY 10020 (212) 782-3890 www.bouchonbakery.com Chantilly Patisserie 135 Parkway Road Bronxville, NY 10708 (914) 771-9400 www.chantillybronxville. com Eclair Bakery 305 East 53rd Street New York, NY 10022 (212) 759-2253 www.eclairbakery-nyc.com Epicerie Boulud 1900 Broadway New York, NY 10023 (212) 595-9606 At the Plaza Food Hall 1 W 59th St New York, NY 10019 (212) 794-2825 www.danielnyc.com Francois Payard Bakery 210 Murray Street New York, NY 10282 (212) 566-8300 116 West Houston Street New York, 10012 (212) 995-0888 1775 Broadway at 58th St New York, 10019 (212) 956-1775 www.fpbnyc.com FP Patisserie At the Plaza Food Hall 1 W 59th St New York, NY 10019 (212) 759-1600 1293 Third Ave at 74th St New York, NY 10021 (212)717-5252 www.payard.com

Jessica Wu / The Spectator

By LIANA CHOW and JONGYOUL LEE

Macaron Café 161 West 36th Street New York, NY 10018 (212) 564-3525 625 Madison Ave New York, 10022 (212)486-2470

750 Third Avenue New York, 10017 (212)983-2370 303 Greenwich Street New York, 10013 (212) 343 2570 www.macaroncafe.com Macaron Parlour 111 St. Marks Place New York, NY 10009 (347) 387-9169 560 Columbus Avenue New York, NY 10024 (212)- 799-9169 www.macaronparlour.com Mad-Mac “The Authentic French Macarons” At Bernardaud 499 Park Avenue at 59th Street New York, NY 10022 (973) 225-0930 www.madmacnyc.com Mille-Feuille Bakery 552 Laguardia Place New York, NY 10012 (646) 626-6472 2175 Broadway New York, NY 10024 (212) 362-6261 www.millefeuille-nyc.com Spot Dessert Bar/Shoppe 5 St. Marks Place New York, NY 10003 (212) 673 6745 www.spotdessertshoppe. com Sugar and Plumm 377 Amsterdam Ave. New York, NY 10024 (212) 787-8778 767 Fifth Avenue (at FAO Schwarz) New York, NY 10022 (212) 644 9400 (Please note this store is in FAO Schwarz) 257 Bleecker Street New York, NY 10014 (212) 388-5757 www.sugarandplumm.com Todd English Food Hall at the Plaza At the Plaza Food Hall 11 W 59th St New York, NY 10019 (212) 986 9260 www.theplazany.com/din ing/todd-english-food-hall/ Woops! 548 Driggs Avenue Brooklyn, NY 11211 (718) 384-4410 Port Authority 625 8th Avenue New York 10018 (888) 599-1255 87 Prince Street New York 10012 379 3rd Avenue New York, NY 10016 (888) 599-1255 www.bywoops.com


The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Page 23

Arts and Entertainment Playlist

Songs to Learn and SING!

Music Let José González Carry You Away

Cristina Chong / The Spectator

By Karen Chen

Now that SING! is over, your vocal chords cease to vibrate with capital-letter enthusiasm and exclamatory zeal. Post-SING! Depression is a bitter pill to swallow, although intoxicated after-party numbness may make this a lot less apparent. What we’re trying to say is that we get where you’re coming from. Having time to do your English reading is somewhat distressing; as is leaving Stuyvesant before the sun sets. You are no longer trapped with the same group of

five to fifteen people every afternoon. Your ears are no longer caressed with the crumbling fuzz of electric guitars, and your elbows feel naked, no longer trapped beneath a layer of paint. As you make the transition to a SING!-free lifestyle, you may find yourself craving SING! And, we are here to say that your desires are perfectly natural. It is okay to yearn for what you have lost. So, to satiate your rose-tinted desires, we have a fresh batch of songs to transport you back to

each of the worlds encapsulated in this year’s SING! Immerse yourself in a Technicolor world of inanimate objects that are larger than life. Feel hot sand burning through the soles of your feet and hear the guttural moans camels make as they badly transition from one sand dune to the next. Squint through clouds of quixotic fairy dust as vast woods reveal themselves to you. With this collection of tunes, anything is possible.

SophFrosh: Toys

Juniors: Ancient Egypt

Seniors: Enchanted Forest

You’ve Got a Friend in Me Randy Newman Country, Pop

Walk like an Egyptian The Bangles Pop Rock

Toys in the Attic Aerosmith Rock

Another Pyramid Aida Musical

Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy Tchaikovsky Classical

Carousel Melanie Martinez Pop

Playing With the Big Boys The Prince of Egypt Soundtrack

Like Toy Soldiers Eminem Hip Hop

Hermetico Balkan Beat Box World

You Think You’re a Man The Vaselines Indie Rock

I am a God Kanye West Hip-hop/Rap

The Heroic WeatherConditions of the Universe, Part 1: A Veiled Mist Alexandre Desplat Soundtrack

Barbie Girl Aqua Pop

House of the Rising Sun The Animals Rock

Wild Life Jack & Jack Hip-hop

Twist Barbie Shonen Knife Bubblegum Punk

Egyptian Robes Miniature Tigers Indie Pop

I Was Born a Unicorn The Unicorns Alternative/Punk

E18 Detektivbyrån Instrumental/Ambient

Black Magic Magic Wands Pop Rock

Daughter of the Woods Vudu Sister Folk

Kids MGMT Indie Pop

The Golden Age The Asteroids Galaxy Tour Psychedelic Pop

Dew in the Grass Sea Wolf Indie Rock

One Tin Soldier The Original Caste Folk Rock

Royals Lorde Pop Rock

Flowers in Your Hair Lumineers Folk

Everything is Awesome Tegan & Sara featuring The Lonely Island Soundtrack

Go Down Moses Louis Armstrong Gospel/Jazz

Norwegian Wood The Beatles Rock

Ego Tripping Nikki Giovani Spoken Word

I Put a Spell on You Screamin’ Jay Hawkins Jazz

Egypt Kate Bush Art Rock

Ragged Wood Fleet Foxes Indie

Toy Man Andy Human Rock Imaginary Friend Johnny Ripper Instrumental

No One is Alone Into the Woods Musical Dirty Paws Of Monsters and Men Indie Folk

Fairy Tale Alexander Rybak Folk Pop

Listening to José González’s new album is a lot like moving amongst the subtle breezes of the deep forest. “Vestiges & Claws” is comprised of soothing acoustic melodies and deep lyrics about silent subjects and emotions. Even after an eight-year hiatus, José González fails to let go of his usual characteristics from previous albums. Again, we are presented with his crisp voice and a background of softly plucked guitar strings in his new album, which was released on February 17. Though González’s most famous songs are his covers of “Teardrop” by Massive Attack and “Heartbeats” by The Knife, he made the decision to make an album containing only original content, and this is the first time he has done so. The ArgentineSwedish singer acts more like a writer—each piece is legitimate piece of poetry, perfectly matched with music to accompany the work’s messages. González recorded most of the album in his kitchen, which allows him to accentuate the sense of intimacy already evoked by the airy but warming quality of voice. He utilized his kitchen’s acoustic features and everyday sounds heard from his home, like the slamming of doors in “Every Age.” González’s lyrics address Renaissance themes with a modern twist. In an interview with the Guardian, he explained, “I’m writing from a humanist perspective.” His work explores the beauty and the beauty of the human condition, but does not turn a blind eye to its ugliness. All the songs have a central idea of appreciating life and of discovering one’s self-contained world. His songs also seem to have literary connections. “Leaf Off / The Cave” has a theme of hope and exploring the world As its name suggests, the song alludes to the stories of the Garden of Eden and Plato’s Cave, joining them with the call for the discovery of “what it means to be alive.” In works such as my personal favorite, “Let It Carry You,” González seems to have a Buddhist frame of mind. He croons, “Can’t you lose the anchor? / And dance the night away / Loosen built up tensions / Let it carry you away / And dissolve into the fall / Of things new, of things gone / To remind our restless souls / Of the beauty of being here at all.” He tells us to move along without caring about trivial matters, and rather, to treasure our existence and further our spiritual development. While at times, it is easy for the background music to overpower his voice in this song, González beautifully layers his vocals over the relatively heavy strums of the guitar. With the addition of slight echoes, his voice slowly fades and dissolves into the background as he sings, “Let it carry away.” This creates an enchanting effect to align his lyrics with the music. Perhaps the most unique song from the album is “The Forest.” It has simple lyrics, but the use of instruments generally unfamiliar to the indie pop scene distinguishes it from the rest of the album. An entrancing violin melody weaves around the soft guitar plucking as González describes the serene landscape ahead of him. He depicts an image of himself walking in a cloud

of mist, too absorbed with what can be seen ahead. The sound of a sweet flute mixes with his singing. He asks in a warm tone, “Why didn’t I see the forest on fire behind in snow / The cracks under the bridge / The gaps along the road.” He realizes the way he has been able to disregard the negative sights, emphasizing the importance of being positive, and does so in a divulging, rather than reprimanding manner. While many feel González is failing to grow as an artist—which is an understandable thought, considering that “Vestiges & Claws” sounds remarkably similar to his previous two albums— it must also be considered that González intentionally wanted this to be the case, as explained in his interview for the Australian site, Faster Louder. He keeps the center of his music concentrated on his simple strums and inti-

The album allows listeners to get lost in the strums and lyrics, transporting us to the land González creates.

mate voice. It is clear, however, that González is beginning to apply new elements to his music, especially when he introduces instruments like the flute, or various percussive elements. While he still manages to keep focus on the twangs of his guitar, he allows for more diverse sounds. González’s key change is most obviously seen within his lyrics, perhaps displaying a change within himself over his hiatus. In his 2007 album, “In Our Nature,” González focuses on the progress of nature, while this album focuses on being in contact with the world we’re living in. “In Our Nature” speaks of hidden cynicism with heavy guitar strums, while “Vestiges & Claws” is made up of mellifluous tones and uplifting lyrics. Every song on “Vestiges & Claws” is well thought-out and carefully created. González has proved to the critics of his last album that he has great abilities as a singer-songwriter. The sound of a heavy rain becoming a slight drizzle describes González’s “Vestiges & Claws.” From the somewhat hefty sound of his previous work emerges a sense of lightness that perfectly compliments Gonzalez’s wispy and wavering voice. The album allows listeners to get lost in the strums and lyrics, transporting us to the land González creates. But, we can also feel grounded in our world with the denseness of his guitar. Each song embodies his positive spirit and outlook on life, because, as he intones in “Afterglow,” “All of this will be gone someday.”


Page 24

The Spectator â—? March 23, 2015

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The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Page 25

Humor These articles are works of fiction. All quotes are libel and slander.

By Daniel Goynatsky As Black History Month fades from memory, the seniors of Stuyvesant High School have found another way to celebrate the diversity of the academic establishment they love and cherish. The Stuy Abolitionist Club has quickly shifted gears from boycotting the discrimination of the water fountains (why is one closer to the ground?), to combating the unequal pricing of Homecoming tickets targeted at freshmen. The small, North Face backpack-wielding, unnoticeable yet loveable and obviously desirable population of Stuyvesant is the new “hot topic” for the Class of 2015. With prom just around the corner, many seniors are realizing that no one in their grade likes them (I’m looking at you, Kevin). These below-average seniors are turning away from their grade and focusing on getting with freshmen that are unaware of their below-averageness (seriously, Kevin). When asked about his approach, senior Johnny Zhang replied that he usually follows a three-step process. “Well first I act goofy and silly,” Zhang explained. “It makes them think that you’re not intellectually superior to them and they really begin to open up, telling you all their problems with teachers, and friends, and before you know it, you’re best friends on Snapchat!” Johnny elaborated that the second step is the most crucial. “You need to seem vulnerable, like you need them. Send them Facebook messages with tons of sad face and crying emojis, and when they ask what’s wrong, tell them that no one likes you.”

This approach will always work, unless you are Kevin (who literally no one likes). The last step is to actually talk to them in real life. As appalling as this all might seem, The Spectator followed a couple of the aforementioned model and watched the events unfold. Senior Chloe Long was leaving SING! practice as she eyed freshman Tymur Kholodnyak drinking water from a water fountain. Long has long been sexually frustrated, some say because of a curse placed on her by her Art Appreciation teacher Dr. Susan Barrow; others say because of her squeaky, daunting, and a-bit-too-happy voice. Either way she seemed to really want some. While Kholodnyak was still drinking water (he must’ve been thirsty), Long “accidentally” bumped into him. She introduced herself as a senior, and before long, they were laughing about SING! and left the school chatting together. As soon as she got home, Long messaged Kholodnyak on Facebook, and by the end of the night, Long and Kholodnyak had exchanged 2043 Facebook messages and 104 Snapchats, four of which were videos. The next day, Long and Kholodnyak spent all of their free periods with each other. When Kholodnyak said he was cold, Long let him borrow her jacket. She loved the way he smelled. They exchanged numbers and later that night did that cute couple thing where you call each other and say, “No you hang up, no you! No you!!” Love was in the air, and so was sexual misconduct under New York Penal Law Code 130.20.

“In Other Words” Staff Storms Spectator Office in Desperate Bid for Readership By 换言之 Stuyvesant 高中下午好. 我 们就是《换言之》, 你们大概听 说过我们, 或者没有。那将是一 件特别难过的事情, 不过这不重 要。我们已抓获你们亲爱的报 纸, 我们不但要 5,000 USD, 而

且在未来, The Spectator 将不 再存在。大家将需要看《换言 之》。我们准备要创建一个幽默 部, 以便大家去那儿, 然后抛弃 报纸。 你们有一个星期。让我们拭 目以待。

Humor Reviews 50 Shades of Grey By Jordan Hodder In a shocking development, the new movie “50 Shades of Grey” has seen strong interest from Stuyvesant viewers, and has quickly become the talk of the school. Many are excited for the movie despite its sexual content and plethora of attractive male and female actors. Industry experts have no explanation as to what could possibly be drawing teenagers to the movie in such large numbers. However, some students confessed that they genuinely enjoy the movie, which critics are lauding as “more or less just two hours of soft-core pornography for middle-aged women.” The movie was especially popular among activists for gender equality, who sympathized with

the main character’s desire to be objectified and brutally dominated by an attractive hypermasculine billionaire. One student activist stated, “When he ties her up and spanks her, he is expressing how much he respects her and views her as an equal.” In fact, many women found the titular antagonist, Christian Grey, strangely alluring. “I don’t get it. Here’s this rich, powerful guy with a chiseled body and a model’s face that drives fancy sports cars and rides around in helicopters, and I somehow found myself attracted to him? I don’t understand how the moviemakers pulled that off,” junior Yoana Cholakova said. On the other hand, many adults were far less impressed with the quality of the movie. “I

am absolutely appalled that anyone could enjoy a film that uses the pretentious British spelling ‘G-R-E-Y’ rather than the good old American ‘G-R-A-Y,’” substitute teacher Mr. Schecter declared. Some students also dubbed the movie unrealistic. “My. Grey is supposed to be this young billionaire, and yet we’re expected to believe that he would pair a custom-tailored charcoal Armani suit with a Rolex,” sophomore Tobias Lange said. “And don’t even get me started on those loafers.” Fans of the film refused to let the criticism dampen their enthusiasm. “Hey, sticks and stones may break my bones, but chains and whips excite me,” senior Shane Lorenzen said.

students space to include more information for teachers. On the old Delaney cards, students were restricted to just one or two phone numbers, and an address. In contrast, the new cubes allow students to include six different phone numbers, two addresses, and a Social Security number. Yet, while these developments would be considered revolutionary on their own, they are just the tip of the iceberg; administrators such as Rodriguez-Tabone feels that the greatest advantage of these cards is that they allow students to write their name 12 times. “In the upper right hand corner of the back side—the green side—where it says ‘address,’ I would like you to write in first name, last name, and the

full name of your dog. I need to be able to contact them in an emergency, in case you and your parents all get hurt. Oh, and if your dog prefers to be called by another name, put that in parentheses underneath where it says ‘favorite color,’” physical education teacher Peter Bologna told his sixth-period class, illustrating the true breadth of information that can be included in the cards. While professionals are hailing the cube as a Nobel-prize worthy development, Stuyvesant is continuing to push the frontier of knowledge in the budding field of attendance taking. Next year, the school hopes to unveil the first-ever Delaney hypercube.

Stuyvesant Introduces Revolutionary New Delaney Cubes

By Jacob Faber-Rico

On the first day of second semester, students walked into their classes expecting to be bored with the tedious, familiar routine of filling out Delaney cards. However, thanks to students in the school’s Applied Physics elective, they found themselves surprised by a groundbreaking piece of attendance-taking technology: the Delaney cube. After many complaints from teachers about how outdated Delaney cards were, the administration decided to eschew a practical computerized system in favor of a more “modern” three-dimensional approach. In comparison to the old cards, the cubes, which are expected to bring an unprecedented new dimension to monitoring attendance and gathering student information, have four more sides to write on and take five more hours to fill out. “I’ve heard complaints from teachers and students alike that the layouts of the old Delaney cards are very confusing. We hope that the extra space offered by the new cubes allows for better organization of student information, so as to clarify the process of attendance-taking,” said Assistant Principal of Organization Sadia Rodriguez-Tabone, who authorized completion of the project last September. In addition to providing better organization, the extra dimension of the cubes gives

Yuchen Jin / The Spectator

Yuchen Jin / The Spectator

Seniors Flirt With Freshmen

De Blasio to Emerge from Bunker into New World of Ice

By Randy Higgins

NEW YORK–Following over a month spent in isolation, fleeing from the arctic wasteland that the world has become, Mayor Bill de Blasio has confirmed that he will soon emerge from his bunker, hoping to repopulate a new world of ice and snow. De Blasio, who fled underground with his family last month to escape the snowy apocalypse about to engulf New York, was not scheduled to emerge until the warmer summer months. However, in a statement to reporters today, de Blasio revealed that the bunker’s generators were malfunctioning, and would not

survive an icy blast like the ones that had doubtlessly killed every New Yorker in January. He also stated that he and his family will now be forced to take their sled dogs over the icy plateau of 6th Avenue to find new shelter, likely in the tenth floor of Stuyvesant High School, which, according to de Blasio, is “always kept at around 85 degrees Fahrenheit, whether it’s summer, winter or the snowy apocalypse,” he said. The family is set to leave within the week, once all their cold weather gear is ready and everyone is up to speed on basic skills in the new world. These include avoiding avalanches and digging into snowdrifts to avoid

the bitter winds that can freeze a man to death in seconds. De Blasio is also making sure that his shovel is sharp, in order to easily cut through snow, ice, and the packs of wolves and bears that doubtlessly now roam this once great city of man. Although he admits the journey will be fraught with peril, de Blasio said simply that “fear is not a luxury we can afford ourselves in this new age of cold and dark. We may find places we knew, or see the remains of those we held dear, but we must move on unfeeling, for tears bring the cold and stillness will mean certain death.”


Page 26

The Spectator â—? March 23, 2015

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The Spectator ● March 23, 2015

Page 27

Sports NBA Season Shaken up by Injuries By Max Schneider After the Spurs took the title last June, basketball fans worldwide became excited about how the next season would shape up, given the influx of superstars all vying for a title. With all the drama throughout this season, it’s hard to say that it’s been a disappointing year by any stretch. But when we take a look at the league now, about half of these superstars are sporting blazers and dress pants, taking the last seat on the bench, and helping their teams only by rooting them on from the sidelines. If your favorite team’s superstar won’t see the court for months, and that destroys your team’s playoff chances, then what keeps you glued to the TV on Sunday nights to watch the games? How can the NBA keep its strong fanbase with its poster boys inactive? The latest superstar to bite the dust is Chicago Bulls point guard Derrick Rose, who tore his meniscus in January while playing the Milwaukee Bucks. Rose’s return was much anticipated this year, after missing almost three years due to a prior ACL tear as well as another torn meniscus. However, Rose isn’t the first superstar to miss games due to injury this season. Of the 28 players selected to this year’s all-star game, only six have played in all their

team’s games. Also, several players who would have made the all-star game haven’t seen any action at all. One of these players is Paul George. George was the most budding superstar in all of basketball, leading the Pacers to the number one seed in the Eastern Conference last season. The Pacers were widely considered a title contender again this year, until George’s gruesome leg break while playing for team USA kept him out for the season. George went up for a layup and came down hard. His leg buckled, and part of his bone protruded from his skin. This injury has sidelined him for months now. Likewise, Carmelo Anthony is out for the remainder of the year due to a knee injury, a thorn in the side of an already subpar Knicks team. The ratings of Knicks games have plummeted since Carmelo’s absence, and deservingly so, since he was averaging twice as many points as New York’s second leading scorer. These household names are becoming non-factors this season, and Kobe Bryant is simply another surefire hall of famer who is down and out. Bryant tore his rotator cuff in January, ending both his season and any enjoyment in watching the Lakers. Bryant has an injuryridden history over the past few years, and hasn’t finished

SPORTS CALENDAR

a season since 2012. Injuries have plagued the end of his career, and it’s a problem that’s occurring for more than just the older guys.

It seems that in a sport full of high-flying dunks, reckless drives to the rim, and hard fouls, the challenge is on the NBA to reduce the injury risk. It seems that in a sport full of high-flying dunks, reckless drives to the rim, and hard fouls, the challenge is on the NBA to reduce the injury risk. Of the ten players who draw the most fouls per game, James Harden is the only one who hasn’t missed significant time this season, and it’s no coincidence that he’s the front-runner to win the MVP award, an award heavily influenced by all the players who haven’t played enough to qualify for it. Last year’s most valuable player, and the early favorite to win this year’s award, was Kevin Durant. However, Durant suffered a Jones fracture, which damages a small but crucial

Thursday 3/19

Boys’ Lacrosse vs. Frederick Douglass Academy

Girls’ Lacrosse vs. Frederick Douglass Academy

@ Randall’s Island Field 73

@ Randall’s Island Field 74

Monday 3/23

Wednesday 3/25

Boys’ Baseball vs. John Bowne

Boys’ Volleyball vs. Fiorello H. LaGuardia

@ Pier 40

@ Fiorello LaGuardia Gym

6.8 rebounds, and 8.1 assists per game. While popularity in the NBA has remained as strong as ever, the NBA should make an effort to reduce the risk of these constant injuries. One way of doing this may be to eliminate back-to-back games, as well as an entire month of preseason games, which can put a large wear-and-tear on players’ muscles. Another remedy might be to create rules to try to halt the number of hard fouls committed. If there’s any silver lining in the large array of injuries, it’s that it brings players who are otherwise not recognized as much into the limelight. Bulls

shooting guard Jimmy Butler was a player scarcely known by the general NBA fanbase, but has made a name for himself this year in the absence of Rose, making his first all-star appearance and helping propel Chicago to the third best record in the East. Anthony Davis has shined in his third season, leading the way for the Pelicans before he sustained a shoulder injury and is now sidelined as well. It seems like we’re weaving out the playoff and MVP races through a process of elimination. This season has still been considered a huge success, with the emergence of new stars, exemplary team basketball from the Atlanta Hawks, the dogfight to prevail in the talented Western conference, James’s return to Cleveland, and more. With this success, does the NBA have an obligation to step in? The National Football League has been on a rampage by creating new regulations to encourage player safety, and the NBA may want to turn to it for ideas. Athletes are only getting stronger, and more injuries may be the result of the increased contact and athleticism in the sport. For now though, the players are making fast recoveries, and hopefully when everyone can be on the court at the same time again, the level of play will be higher than ever.

Girls’ Basketball

Rebirth of the Phoenix By Tousif Hossain and James Ng

Wednesday 3/18

bone in the foot. During the time Durant has missed, Russell Westbrook has asserted himself into the Thunder offense, averaging 26.5 points,

Holders of a remarkable 12-2 record last season, it was difficult to imagine that the Stuyvesant Phoenix could get any better. However, this season, Coach Vincent Miller led the girls’ basketball team to an even better 14-1 record. Despite an early second round exit in the playoffs, the Phoenix had an exceptional season in which they were a dominant force. In addition to being the top team in their division, the Phoenix also blew out their opponents by an average of 25 points. “I’m incredibly proud of the season we had,” junior Rose Cytryn said. “We did have our share of ups and downs, but when it really counted we became the best team that we could be.” This season went incredibly well for the Phoenix. There were not many weak points on the team due to the exceptionally talented roster. Senior Sophie Gershon was outstanding during the season, anchoring the team both offensively and defensively. Towering at an impressive height of 6’3”, it was not surprising to hear that she was the Phoenix’s leading scorer and rebounder this season, averaging 20 points and 13 rebounds per game. Senior Lauren Sobota was another exceptional player who was just as crucial to the team as Gerson. Sobota led the Phoenix in assists and was the second leading scorer, averaging 11 points and 6 assists per game. Often daz-

zling the crowd with her adroit handles and fancy behind-theback passes, Sobota was a constant source of energy. Much of the Phoenix’s success has to do with the exceptional performances of these two.

“I’m incredibly proud of the season we had. We did have our share of ups and downs, but when it really counted we became the best team that we could be.” —Rose Cytryn, junior

The team rode an impressive nine-game winning streak straight into the second round of the playoffs against the undefeated Canarsie Lady Chiefs.

The team felt confident as they entered the game against the Lady Chiefs. The game would go on to feature two exceptionally well-matched teams in which the scoreboard was close the entire game. In the last minute of the game, the Phoenix needed only one basket to tie the game. Unfortunately, their efforts came just short and Stuyvesant lost 53-51. Gershon and Sobota had 23 points and 10 points respectively, while freshman Shannon Lau came up big contributing 10 points of her own. The Phoenix will be losing their superstar center and three other seniors, leaving a large void to fill, but the team hopes to maintain in a positive mindset. “[The seniors] really had a large impact on how we played as a team,” junior Alexis Kushner said. “But even with their loss, I have no doubt the team will be able to suffice.” The ascension of the younger players should be able enough to hold the top spot in the division next year. Lau was the team’s third leading scorer, with five points per game, and should hope to have a breakout season next year, as she will have more shots with the absence of Gershon and Sobota. Juniors Alexis Kushner and Christina Chong are also expected to be key players next year, as they are this year’s fourth and fifth leading scorers respectively. Next year is going to be a tough transition for the Coach Miller and the Phoenix, but the team definitely has an abundance of potential to be just as great.


March 23, 2015

Page 28

The Spectator SpoRts Boys’ Volleyball

Boys’ Lacrosse

High Hopes for the Peglegs

Beasts Aim to Regain Former Domination

Yueer Niu / The Spectator

By Lucy Wang and Joshua Zhu

Last Years’ Season: Wins

9

Losses

3

By Xuanjia Fan Stuyvesant boys’ varsity lacrosse team, the Peglegs, aim to reach the playoffs again this season. After the team was defeated by Bronx Science in the first game of the playoffs last year, the team hopes to improve and reach the finals. To do so, the team has been vamping up their practices and working to improve their communication.

“We need to find some more offensive production to pick up the slack.” —Laolu Ogunnaike, junior

Though the team was second seed in the division and went into the playoffs strong last year, much of the team’s success can be attributed to Noah Kramer (’14), a very talented player who made 100 shots out of the team’s 179. “Our main problem last year was that we just dumped the ball to him and the rest of us kind of just waited for him to score,” junior Jake Brimberg said. Other team members agree that the Kramer departure has left a big gap that the team must fill for this season. “I think we have large shoes to fill with the departure of Noah Kramer,” junior Laolu Ogunnaike said. “We need to find some more offensive production to pick up the slack.” Because there doesn’t seem to be a prominent-enough player this season who can single-handedly fill the shoes of Kramer, the team realizes that they must work together if they hope to play at the same level as they did last year. To do so, the Peglegs have been working to improve their team’s chemistry and communication during games. They have also prepared for the coming season with a much more demanding practice schedule than was in place last year. Their practices now include sprinting and running up stairs. “The team has put in a lot of work this season, much more than we have ever done before,” junior Dante Del Priore said. Because the Public Schools Athletic League has changed

the divisions for this season, Stuyvesant has new contenders to match and a more rigorous schedule. The Peglegs must face their rivals from Hunter High School, which some team members feel may be a great obstacle. The Peglegs must also play against some returning teams such as Curtis, last year’s second place winner, and Port Richmond. Both Staten Island teams are known to be tough competitors and many team members express their anxiety in regards to upcoming matches against these schools.

“[The team has only] one goal: To win our division and to win the city championship.” —Johnny Zhang, senior

After being a dominant force in the Manhattan VIII division, the Beasts, Stuyvesant’s boys’ volleyball team, were placed into the much more difficult Manhattan A West division last year. The ensuing season was not easy for fans of the normally successful team to digest; Stuyvesant finished fourth in the division, with a record of 4-6, and failed to make the playoffs. As the team enters the 2014-2015 season, they hope to erase last season’s anomaly and regain their former dominance. Excluding Mingyung Jiang (‘14) and Kevin Zhang (‘14), the boys’ volleyball team has retained their entire roster from the previous season while adding new potential this season. Although this roster was not very successful last season, they still grew together and gained experience from their difficult times. Having some of the same teammates will greatly benefit the team, as they will be able to build upon their chemistry from last season. “We suffered some pretty heavy loses both on and off the court [last year], but the core fought through it, and the same key people are back again this year,” junior Dimitar Novakov said. The returning starters are back and ready to fight for a spot in the playoffs. Last year’s team was plagued by confidence issues and lack of motivation to compete when there was a huge disparity in the scoreboard. “Last season, we were quick to give up on plays and lost confidence in ourselves as the opposing team started doing well,” junior Samuel Kotlyar said. Seniors and co-captains Eric Lee and Vincent Huang hope to address this issue by becoming more

open with their teammates both off and on the court. “Both of us know what works and what doesn’t, and also know the importance of having captains the players can easily talk to and rely on,” Lee said. “I know we are more than capable of becoming a stronger team, especially if we continue to work on our weak aspects.” As the team continues to strengthen their chemistry, many of them know they also need to improve communication on the court because communication is crucial during volleyball games. “Everyone on the team has the skills—we just need to put them together as a single unit,” Novakov said. In this upcoming season, one player who coach Vaskin Choubaralian is excited to see develop is junior Victor Hoang, whose play will be a deciding factor on this year’s team. Hoang is the team’s starting libero, meaning that he is responsible for receiving serves as well as other defensive responsibilities. Needless to say, stellar play on his part would greatly benefit the team. “I’m the support of the team. You can’t have a good offense when you don’t have a good defense,” Hoang said. Another key player this year will be Kotlyar. As the starting opposite side hitter, he has a large advantage hitting on the right side because he is lefthanded. In addition to spiking, the opposite hitter must also be able to set as the backup setter on the court. His outstanding sets will be critical during games. The Beasts are determined to have better luck this season as they face the same talented teams they faced last year. Now that they know how the teams in this new league play, they are ready to adjust both the mental and physical aspects to win.

However, the players remain confident in their abilities and have high hopes for this coming season. “I think we’re prepared to make a run to the championship,” Ogunnaike said.

• The Phoenix, Stuyvesant’s girls’ basketball team, lost in the second round of the playoffs to Canarsie Educational Campus on March 4, 53-51. The Phoenix ended the regular season with an impressive 14-1 record. Good job to all their hard work this season! • Congratulations to everyone who ran at the PSAL Freshman Sophomore Indoor Track & Field City Championship! Special shout-out to sophomore Harvey Ng, who came in sixth place in the 3200-meter run. • Get ready for spring sports! Next week will feature the season opener for boys’ baseball, boys’ and girls’ lacrosse, boys’ volleyball, and girls’ softball.

Ashley Lin / The Spectator

Sports Wrapup


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