Sophie Woman's Magazine June 2012

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VOLUME 8 - ISSUE 4 / JUNE 2012

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phie

Wo m a n ’ s M a g a z i n e

INSIDE: Girlfriends In God ~ Gossip Is Deadly | Page 15 Journaling The Journey ~ My Cancer Emotions | Page 11 Behind The Name ~ A Brief Look At Influential Women In History | Page 19

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From The Editor: Judy Smith

from the

Our april 2012 Winners

What will you be doing on June 17th, 2012? I hope, if your Father is alive, that you in some way will be honoring him. Even if you don’t have the greatest father in the world, you still owe him honor. A lot of you might argue that with me and tell me if I knew your father, that I would not say that. If I had gone through what you had with your father, then I would understand. Well, the Bible does not give us an out for this…unless we want our lives to be shortened. Exodus 20:12 tells us “ “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.” I think that means being respectful in word and action, plus, not just for the way they raised you but for the position they hold. Sometimes, I am shocked at the way children (including grown) talk back to their parents. Have you listened lately? What is happening to us as a society? I would never have thought to talk back to my dad. Well, OK, maybe I would have thought it but I would never have put it into action. I wouldn’t have “rolled” my eyes at him either. What does that mean…rolling your eyes? I am not sure, but I am pretty sure it is not showing respect or shouting “I love you” at the top of your voice.

Pro Winner: Lasting Generations Photography

My father wasn’t the greatest role model but he was my father. Even with all the turmoil we went through, I really wish I could see him and talk with him now. I would tell him that I loved him and even though he couldn’t show his love for me, I still know he loved me. His upbringing played a huge part in that…a part I didn’t see till I was much older. “A wise son heeds his father’s instruction, but a mocker does not listen to rebuke” (Proverbs 13:1). A father wants to guide his children to have a full and happy life. Sometimes that is hard for us to see or to understand but I am sure, that when most fathers give advice it is for their good and not something to harm them. Have you thought about the things your father has tried to tell you over the years? Most dad’s say they don’t want anything for Father’s Day but I know something they really want. They want you to spend time with them. They want to hear you tell them you love them. They want to know they matter to their children. So what are you doing on June 17th this year?

Amateur Winner: Kathryn Cooke

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lived, and let me watch him do it.” ~Clarence Budington Kelland

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phie Woman’s Magazine

21 East A Street Newton, NC 28658 (P) 828-466-0122 (F) 828-466-0124

Editor: Judy Smith

Production Manager & Graphic Design: Scott Hansley Sales: Terri Ferraguto 828.228.2812 terri@sophiewomansmagazine.com Janet Gibson 828.310.5930 janet@sophiewomansmagazine.com Summer Intern: Kaylyn McCarraher kaylyn@sophiewomansmagazine.com

A Special Thanks To All Of Our Distributors Please be sure to visit all of our participating advertisers and remember to support area local small businesses. How to place an ad: Call our office at (828)466-0122 and leave a message. One of our sales representatives will return your call as soon as possible. You may also fax material to (828)466-0124. We reserve the right to refuse to run any ad we deem to be controversial or in bad taste. For more information about advertising or to view Sophie Woman’s Magazine online, visit our website at www.sophiewomansmagazine.com.

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Message From The Heart......................................pg 3 Reaching Your Full Potential................................pg 7 How To Be Fabulous............................................pg 8 JournalingThe Journey...........................................pg 11 The Fly Lady........................................................pg 13 Girlfriends In God...............................................pg 15 Health & Fitness Tips..........................................pg 16 Behind The Name................................................pg 19 The Dinner Diva..................................................pg 20 Sophisticated Women..........................................pg 23 Binge Cooking.....................................................pg 24 Me, Myself, & Inc...............................................pg 27 Annie Oakley, Calamity Jane, & Judy Who?.....pg 29 Design For The Real World................................pg 31 Recipes For Life..................................................pg 33 Garage Organize How To ..................................pg 35 Truth & Beauty....................................................pg 36 The Wedding Planner..........................................pg 38 Shutterbuggerz.....................................................pg 39

*Coming Soon* SUBSCRIPTIONS We have been asked by many of our readers to offer a subscription to Sophie Woman’s Magazine. If you would like more information about a subscription, please visit our website at:

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com or you can call us at:

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********************************************************** Disclaimer: Sophie Woman’s Magazine LLC is published monthly. The articles published in Sophie do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the publisher. All articles are intended for informational purposes only, and none should serve as a substitute for doctor’s advice and orders. Advertisers are solely responsible for the content and validity of information published within their ads and are not necessarily endorsed by the publisher. Deceptive or misleading advertising is not knowingly accepted by the publisher. Advertising is accepted with the understanding that all liability for copyright violations is the sole responsibility of the advertiser. All material submitted for publication is considered to be the sole property of the advertiser. Sophie Woman’s Magazine LLC’s publishers, staff, and other persons involved in the creation, production, or delivery of the magazine (in whatever format) or ti’s content, do not assume any liability or responsibility for the accuracy, completeness, or usefulness of any information provided in the magazine, nor shall they be liable for any direct, indirect, incidental, special, consequential, or punitive damages arising out of the use of the magazine. **********************************************************


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REACHING YOUR FULL POTENTIAL: Take Your Wings and Fly!

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by Kim Fletcher, Life Coach, Author, Speaker

e all need practical strategies to take our lives to a higher level. We also need inspiration. For that reason, I introduce you to my friend Denise. I feel quite confident that every reader will find hope embedded in her story that will leave you empowered and motivated to ‘take your wings and fly.’ Most babies are born healthy, igniting the parents’ hope in what the new little person will become. Denise’s entrance into this world followed a much different path. Due to poor medical judgment, Denise’s birth was intentionally delayed as nurses awaited the doctor’s arrival for this breech baby. The delay of her inevitable entry into this world left Denise with the devastating diagnosis of Cerebral Palsy, leaving her with a severe disability which would allow her to develop clear speech, a strong mind, a partially functioning left arm and the ability to move her head. With functional limitations similar to a quadriplegic, life was marked by challenges and the certainty that Denise would require assistance for her basic daily needs. This may not sound like the beginnings of a highly successful college graduate and leader, but that is exactly who Denise has become. Unwilling to be defined by her disability, destiny prevailed. Her grade school and high school years were awkward and difficult due to special education classes and peers who were fickle and cruel in their exclusion of this young woman. Modern law allows Denise (and those like her) into a regular classroom, but law cannot regulate kindness, respect or value from teachers and students. She would have to tap into her own belief in her future. In 1979, Denise enrolled in Ball State University, one of the first accessible colleges reaching out to students with disabilities. She was able to live on campus and function as an ordinary student. Circumstances required Denise to transfer in 1980 to a school closer to home. For a short time, she commuted from her parents’ home to an extension of Purdue University in Hammond, Indiana. In the fall of 1982, her mother was diagnosed with emphysema and the growing care demands placed on her father led to a life-altering family decision. The crushing reality of his daughter’s disability and his wife’s failing health led Denise’s father to a difficult conclusion: it was time for Denise to re-enroll at Ball State University, assume full responsibility for her own care – and ultimately, for her own life. The powerful conclusion to this painful chat was his charge to his daughter to “take your wings and fly”. Denise reflects, “At the age of 22, I couldn’t realize how powerful those words would be to my future.” Once again, unthinkable circumstances which would crush many individuals became the catalyst which fueled Denise’s passionate desire to make the most of her life, broken pieces and all.

Denise graduated with a Social Work degree and began her work as an Independent Living Specialist, bringing practical resources and strategies to individuals affected by disability who were seeking to live independently. Denise fused her own experience with disability and her education to bring empowerment, peer counseling, personal assistance and system advocacy to countless people between 1987 and 2001. 1987 marked another milestone when Denise was married. Fifteen years later led to divorce after much work to save the relationship. One separation along that difficult road led Denise to become a resident in a skilled nursing facility, the same type of place she empowered others to leave. Again, experience fueled her compassion and life purpose. This young woman simply refused to put limits on her future as she allowed every situation she faced to make her a stronger and more grateful person. Her inner spark refused to be extinguished. A devastating fall left Denise’s mobility more limited, making it difficult for her to work outside of her home. Instead of giving up, this sparked her interest in Life Coaching, as Denise realized that her advanced communication skills could make this profession a perfect fit. Of her coaching, Denise quickly remarks, “I can help someone look at possibilities and expand their thinking. I am with them on their journey.” Today, Denise loves coaching individuals through grief, loss, and disability – holding them accountable for taking action that brings about hope and change. Denise’s life and successes remind us to refuse to give up, to define our identity based on our true value, to shake off the labels placed on us, and to remember to turn our greatest challenges into our greatest impact. There is a spark inside of you which refuses to be extinguished. Feed that spark as you ‘take your wings and fly’. Kim Fletcher is CEO of Kim Fletcher Associates, a cutting-edge team of Life Coaches and Speakers who are seeking to leave the world better than they found it. Denise Horn is the newest team member. Contact us today to learn how our coaching and training can bring lasting transformation to individuals and teams globally: www.kimfletcherassociates.com / kimfletchercoach@aol.com / 828 327 6702.

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 7


When Life Gives Fabulous You Lemons! HOW TO BE

by Gracie

“When life gives you lemons...squirt them in mean peoples eyes!” Well, that’s one way to handle things...I have to admit it’s kinda fun to do. For those ‘less aggressive’ ladies...I have lots of ideas to make a bad day better. Here are my top 5... 1. Watch your favorite reruns, then go out wearing a pink tutu... You know the one. Channel your inner “trendy girl” and look fabulous and HAPPY, even while being soaked by a not so nice taxi! Seriously, rockin’ a unique, whimsical, girly-girl piece just makes ya wanna giggle! Polka dots are an easy, less radical, option for those “conservative” types. If you’re a “look at me kind of girl”...try some bling and glitter! And for you “other’s” out there... hmmm, try one of the other suggestions...lol. 2. Kiss a boy...while wearing lace and frilly everything!

3. Have a sweet tea on the porch swing...in a sundress. Ahhhh, nothin’ like a little country girl time. Be sugar and spice and watch the boys be nice! The best summer dresses are flowy and comfortable, with just a hint of flirtation. There are maxi’s and mini’s... but if ya got the ‘stems’...flaunt ‘em! I’ve always been partial to the shorter dresses ‘cause there’s nothing hotter than a little peek of a great leg! And if ya wanna slip your pretty lil’ tootsies into a soft as butter pair of cowboy boots...even better. 4. Have a girl’s day/night/weekend! Misery loves company...especially a bestie who will make you laugh at yourself. Best outfit for b*&$# session... sweats...just sayin. “A friend will help you up when you are down. A best friend will help you up, then trip you again and laugh hysterically!” We all need one of these fabulous comrades. The one that will make your sides hurt! Renee, fab friend and boutique manager/stylist (see previous articles) is one of these gems. Get cozy, order a really cheesy pizza, grab a beer/ wine/martini, etc., and just chill with your buddy. Best ‘sweats’? Pink by Victoria’s Secret. Although Renee keeps telling me I can’t have letters on my behind...over 40 thing. Oh well... 5. Go outside... and play. Best ‘play clothes’ are good ole’ jeans and a tank. Why don’t we play outside as adults??? There is nothing better than the smell of fresh cut grass and gardenias. I was playing catch in our backyard with my son Robbie yesterday and remembered why kids do this. It was

pg 8 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2012

xoxo

A yucky day is just screaming for you to turn it around and make it amazing. It’s ok to have them, we all do. The important thing is to make ‘em count. Truly look at why you are getting “lemons”. Is it really THAT bad? Then be happy for the blessings in your life...count each one. If all else fails...well, retail therapy always works for me! Be happy sugar, cause life is not only short...it’s sweet.

Photo Courtesy of NicholLancaster.com

There’s something about a kiss. Innocent...yet a good one can make your knees buckle! Add to that the cool, breezy feeling of lace, and ya got yourself a dang good day! Always be sure to have a nude colored cami for best ‘lace and nothin else’ look. For frills... keep it simple silly (did ya get that?? k.i.s.s. ;)). A bit of a ruffle on a blouse or a solid colored ruffled skirt is the perfect compliment to romance!

relaxing and at the same time invigorating. I felt young and, well, kinda silly. That is until the baseball popped up from a grounder and smacked me in the head. It’s me, remember?? While taking part of this “feel better quick” option, definitely get a pair of L.A. Idol Jeans (Soooo cute, under $80) and throw on a tri blend tank or tee. This material is actually softer than 100% cotton! Point is, just get out of the house! Make a picnic, take a stroll, play with the kids and/or pets, or even just grab a coffee, sit at the park and breeeeaaaathe.


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Journaling The J urney

by Judy Smith

Last month I shared with you about letting my granddaughters cut my hair really short because I just didn’t think emotionally, I would be able to handle it coming out in clumps into my hand. So, I am just thinking how smart I am being about all this and how I have these “cancer emotions” under control. So, so wrong! It was about two weeks after “the haircut” that it starting happening. I woke up one morning with hair all over my pillowcase. That day everywhere I sat, hair, all over my cloths; hair, on my shoulder and back; hair and worst of all in my face. You know how annoying it is when a hair gets on your face and you just can’t find it? That drives me crazy, especially if it is close to my eyes. That night there was a meeting I was planning on attending and even though it was a bad day, I was determined to go. It was a great meeting and I made it through most, but, getting a little sicker and tired, I thought I needed to leave a little early. I had worn a scarf on my head for the first time that evening. So I get to my car and driving down the road, I am thinking I need to get my head shaved…now, but my hairdresser is closed. Then I remember the places that do the men’s clips and I am going by those places and if they are still open, I am going to stop. Now I don’t even know the name of the place I stopped but when I went in, this lady asked if she could help me and I told her I wanted my head clipped, shaved… what ever they call it. She said she would be with me in fifteen minutes. There were two guys there, one getting the same thing I wanted and the other just getting a little taken off. Fifteen minutes!!! As I sat in that chair waiting, I think every ounce of water in my body, starting from my toes, starting working up toward my head. I could feel the emotions starting to burst open within me. Breath, take long slow breaths, relax, it’s just hair, God’s got this and I know that….what is happening here….breath Judy! Then I heard her say she was ready for me. One last deep breath, I stood up, walked over to her chair, sat down and she wanted to know what did I want. I took off my scarf and started to open my mouth to tell her but it wouldn’t come out. My dad used to say I could cry some crocodile tears but he never saw anything like this. Buckets of tears was flowing, I couldn’t talk and the poor girl that I subjected this to had no idea what kind of nut case was sitting in her chair. I had no idea this would ever happen. She started by telling me they didn’t style hair. I finally told her I

didn’t need a style, I just needed it gone. Not shaved with a razor, but clipped with one of those clipper things they use, like she just did on one of those men. She wanted to know what size clipper number did I want her to use. Again, all the tears, then I told her as short as she could go with it. My hair was falling out from the chemo and I just needed it off. We got through it with me using a roll of her toilet paper to try to catch some of the tears. She couldn’t find any buckets. I paid her with wet money and out the door I went. Got in my car and just completely broke down. Finally, I felt like I was composed enough to drive myself home. I was doing pretty good, still crying, not hysterically as before and then my husband calls. Of course the minute he hears my voice, he gets panicked worrying what is wrong, especially when he can’t understand a single word I am saying. Crying talk is a whole other language that is hard to interpret. When I arrive home, there he is standing out waiting for me, ready to give me hugs and reassurance but the buckets open up again. Just so you know, the crying did stop, the emotions passed and I settled down and started breathing regular again. I cannot even explain this except that it is just part of it. One of my cancer books talked about it but I hadn’t really experienced it before, or at least nothing like this. Being a person of strong faith, I know that God IS IN CONTROL of my life, even the cancer. I know He will get me through it or over it. So I am left with a great burden on my heart. How do people handle “big things” without hope? All the people who suffer with illness, a broken home, a financial crisis, losing their jobs or losing their homes or worse losing a child; how do they get through it? When I see people in pain, I want to take it away from them but I cannot but I know who can. When my resources are gone, God’s never are. When my strength is gone, God can still move mountains. Just remember, even though we sometimes think we may be given more than we can handle, we are never given more than God can handle. “Dear Lord, Will you give peace to all those who are reading this. Give them your strength, your comfort and your love. Together we are on these journeys. In Jesus Name. Amen” Much love to you all!

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 11


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FlyLady THE

by Marla Cilley

Look for the Silver Lining I have noticed an overwhelming veil of negativity everywhere I look these days. For me it is a mystery that must be uncovered and then decluttered to bring some joy back into our lives. I know the world is full of half empty kind of people. The TV news, Radio, Facebook, and Twitter all contribute to the negative things overshadowing the positive stories. This got me to thinking about how we can change the way we look at things. As always when I am pondering a topic a song comes to mind. This morning the God Breeze was “Look for the Silver Lining”. I did a Google search for the lyrics and found one verse (which isn’t sung often) that has to do with the drudgery of doing dishes. As I wash my dishes, I’ll be following your plan, Till I see the brightness in ev’ry pot and pan. I am sure your point of view will ease the daily grind, So I keep repeating in my mind. Look for the silver lining When e’er a cloud appears in the blue. Remember some where the sun is shining, And so the right thing to do, Is make it shine for you. My Grandmother taught me, “Can’t never could do anything!” She instilled in me a “Can Do!” spirit! If you think you can! You will! When we dwell on the negative we create a sadness in our lives. We all deserve to be happy! That happiness comes from within. Stop allowing the external influences to determine your attitude of the day. We can change it by looking for that silver lining. Create your own Happiness File in your life. I learned

this from Pam Young in her book called The Happiness File. We have to surround ourselves with things that make us smile. This is why we shine our sinks and declutter items that remind us of sad times. My happiness file has become a virtual one on Pinterest. I have set up many boards that bring smiles to my day. I also have my playlist in my iTunes that make me happy when I listen to them. Youtube is another way to bring some grins and giggles into your life! And my favorite way to start laughing out loud is to watch the animals on America’s Funniest Home Videos. Another thing we all can do is to stop posting negative comments on Facebook. This breaks my heart when I see people commenting on how bad they have it. For me this is whining! At FlyLady, we live in a NO WHINING ZONE! When you catch yourself about to fall into the negative trap of whining; look for the silver lining! Be the one who finds something positive to say! Lift others up and become a shining beacon of love for the world! Your silver lining is contagious! Smile and the world smiles with you! For more help getting rid of your CHAOS, check out her website and join her free mentoring group at www.FlyLady.net or her book, Sink Reflections published by Random House and her New York Times Best Selling book, Body Clutter published by Simon and Schuster. Copyright 2012 Marla Cilley Used by permission in this publication.

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 13


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Gossip Is Deadly by Sharon Jaynes

Today’s Truth “Without wood a fire goes out; without gossip a quarrel dies down,” (Proverbs 26:20 NIV).

Friend to Friend A monster was sneaking into my yard in the dark of night and devouring my prize plants. I never saw his beady eyes or heard his pounding footsteps – just the aftermath of his destruction. He left a trail of slim as he moved from plant to plant, leaving large gaping holes in broad leaf Gerber Daisies, gnawing entire velvety trumpet-shaped blossoms on purple petunias and reducing bushy begonias to naked stalks. I asked a neighbor about my flowerbed’s demise and she determined, “You’ve got slugs.” Slugs!” I exclaimed. “The yard monster is a tiny little slug?” “You can put out slug bait to catch them and see for yourself,” my confident neighbor continued. I sprinkled slug bait all around the yard and then waited. The next morning I viewed the “monsters” remains. The beasts were about ¼ inch long – about the size of my little toe nail. How could something so small cause so much damage in such a short amount of time? I mused. Then my mind thought of something else that is very small that can cause enormous damage in a short amount of time… gossip. King Solomon wrote, “The words of a gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to a man’s inmost parts.” Just as one tiny slug can destroy an entire flower bed, so can one tiny morsel of gossip destroy a person’s reputation, question one’s character, and devour a friendship. In the South we have this knack for making gossip sound… almost nice. All you have to do is add “bless her heart” to the end of the sentence. It goes like this: “Susie gained fifty pounds with that last pregnancy, bless her heart.” “Marcy’s husband ran off with his secretary, bless her heart.” “I heard Clair yelling at the postman yesterday, bless her heart.” But all the “bless her hearts” don’t mask what it really is…gossip. Solomon wrote, “Whoever repeats the matter separates close friends,” (Proverbs 17:9 TNIV). Charles Allen, the author of God’ Psychiatry observed: “Those of great minds discuss ideas, people of mediocre minds discuss events, and those of small minds discuss other people.” Maybe if we are spending our time talking about people, we need to fill our minds with better material such as good books and other reading material (and I don’t mean People Magazine or the National Enquirer). What exactly is gossip? Webster defines gossip as ”easy, fluent, trivial talk, talk about people behind their backs.” It is repeating

information about another person’s private affairs. If you have to look around to make sure that no one can hear what you are saying, you are probably gossiping. If you would not say something in front of the person you are talking about, then you’re probably gossiping. We have often heard the phrase, “knowledge is power.” Perhaps that is why gossip is so appealing. It suggests a certain amount of power because, “I have the inside scoop.” But gossip is not power. On the contrary it shows a lack of power…lack of selfcontrol. Today, let’s make our lives a NO GOSSIP ZONE.

Let’s Pray Lord, please keep a guard over my mouth today. If I even consider gossiping about someone, convict me before a word leaves my mouth. May the words of my mouth be pleasing in Your sight today. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Now It’s Your Turn Go back to Webster’s definition of gossip. Can you think of anything you have said in the last week that would fit that description? Let’s “say no” to gossip. If you are willing to eliminate gossip from your life, click over to www.facebook.com/sharonjaynesand type in the following words: I’m living in a NO GOSSIP ZONE.

More from the Girlfriends Today’s devotion was taken from Sharon’s book, The Power of a Woman’s Words. If you would like to learn about how to control your words and use them to speak life into those in your sphere of influence, then this is the book for you. Visit www.sharonjaynes. com to download a free chapter, watch a video or place an order.

Seeking God? To find out more about how to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Girlfriends in God P.O. Box 725 Matthews, NC 28106 info@girlfriendsingod.com www.girlfriendsingod.com www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 15


Chest Exercises Exercise Number One- Alternating Dumbbell Pullover- This exercise works the Pectoralis Major Muscle and the Upper Back.

by Sharon Rashidi B.S. Health Education

EIGHT WEEKS TO A FIRMER BUST Last week after teaching a Tabata class, one of my members came up to me and asked if it was possible to firm up her bustline without having surgery. I explained to her that while breast tissue is mainly made up of fat, it is possible to tone up the muscles that lie underneath. If she followed my simple chest and upper back strength training exercise routine at least three days a week, ate a healthy diet with portion control, she could see results in as little as two months. The breast is primarily composed of fat and connective tissues; it contains no muscle tissue. Muscles lie underneath the breast, forming a line of separation between the ribs and the breasts. The main muscles that support the breasts are called the pectoralis major and pectoralis minor. Pectoralis major spreads from the sternum to below the breasts and also extends to the outer edges of the collarbones. A smaller triangle of muscle, pectoralis minor, lies at the outer edge of the breast. In order to see a difference in the firmness of the breast, you need to exercise both the pectoralis major and minor muscles. It’s natural for breast tissue to lose its elasticity and firmness due to aging, childbirth and breast feeding. Most women in their late 30s and upwards experience some form of breast sagging. It is inevitable, since gravity will take its toll on your bust. However, it is possible to slow this process down through chest and upper back strength training. Why do you need upper back strength training to firm your bust? Adding upper back strengthening exercises to your chest strengthening routine will lift your chest upward, which in turn will make your breasts appear more youthful. Plus upper back strengthening improves your posture as well. Posture is an important key to make your breasts appear perkier. If you slouch or round forward all the time, your chest will appear smaller. Remember to always eat a healthy, well balanced diet and include at least thirty minutes a day of cardio exercise where you get your heart rate elevated. In just eight weeks, you too can have a firmer more youthful looking bust.

pg 16 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2012

1. Step Number One-Lie down on your back across a bench, step or even the floor. Have your arms extended above your chest and holding a dumbbell with both hands.

Step 1

2. Step Number Two-While keeping your arms rigid, slowly raise your arms (alternating right and left) above your head until you feel a good stretch. Tips- Complete 8-12 repetitions for one set. For Variation you can use one dumbbell and hold on with both hands. Go slowly concentrating on good form.

Step 2

Step 3

Exercise Number Two- Chest Fly Pulls- This exercise can both strengthen and stretch the Pectoralis Minor Muscle and Upper Body.

Step 1

Step 2

1. Step Number One - Lie down on your back across a bench, step or even the floor. Hold a pair of dumbbells, one in each hand, with your arms outstretched forming a letter “T”. 2. Step Number Two-While keeping a slight bend in your arms elbows, slowly pull your arms toward the middle of your chest, almost touching the weights or hands together before lowering your arms to the sides again. Tips- Complete 8-12 repetitions for one set. Go slowly concentrating on good form. To avoid injury, choose weights that are reasonable. You can increase the weights in 4-6 weeks.


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BN

ehind ame the A Short Look At Influential Women In History by Kaylyn McCarraher

Anna Eleanor Roosevelt

Proverbs 31:26 – She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.

Eleanor Roosevelt, a name that rings a bell in everyone’s ear. Who is this woman and why is she a legacy of sorts? Yes, she was the wife of Franklin D. Roosevelt making her the 32nd first lady but I believe there is more behind this name other than a list of facts and accomplishments. Behind this name stands a woman who is a fine example to us all, male and female alike. Let’s start from the beginning with a much younger Eleanor with dirty blonde curls and blue eyes born in October of 1884. She grew up with two other siblings in a privileged, upper class family in New York. Eleanor was able to have the rare luxury of private tutoring at her home because she wasn’t able to read. This tutor taught her grammar, arithmetic, poetry and literature. Her family then moved to Europe. Contrary to how her story sounds so far the word privileged does not accurately describe her upbringing. Her mother died when Little Eleanor was only eight years old from what is believed to be Diphtheria. Her father died when she was nine from alcoholism. During this hard time she was placed in a convent for two years then attended Allenswood Girl’s Academy in London, England. Here she met Marie Souvestre who took her under her wing and taught her a different kind of education. Young Eleanor was exposed to impoverished areas and was taught political views that weren’t common amongst the public. Eleanor would later refer to this as “the happiest time of her life”. As a teen and young adult she was very active in taking part in several movements to help publicize the cruel environments that most impoverished and immigrant workers had to work in. At twenty years of age Eleanor fell in love with a charming fellow who was about to graduate from Harvard. His name was Franklin Delano Roosevelt. Yes, the two shared the last name because they were 5th cousins once removed. After marriage Franklin was the Senate of New York and Eleanor was the supportive wife who carried the traditional role of entertaining guests and attending socials. Her interest in politics grew along with her husband’s career. Unfortunately, as her husband’s career grew so did his attention for Ms. Lucy Mercer. Few people knew of his affair with Ms. Mercer (his secretary) and once Eleanor was informed she gave her husband a choice. She calmly offered him a divorce or he was to stop seeing her. Franklin discontinued his relationship with Lucy. With her life seemingly back on track Eleanor continued her political growth and involvement. Then, in 1921, tragedy struck once again. Franklin had developed paralysis and it wasn’t likely for him to

walk again. She continued to carry her husband’s campaigns and politics along with her own. Eventually, all of their hard work had paid off and in 1933 Franklin D. Roosevelt was elected president of the United States. The people loved the Roosevelt couple! Franklin was loved for his politics and Eleanor for her love of people. She created an even playing field between herself and the public. She planted victory gardens, learned to use a gas mask, answered the white house door personally, had the grandchildren stay over, cooked for her husband on Sundays, wore the same kinds of clothing the general public wore and even served hot dogs to the Queen and King of England! However, the true beauty of Eleanor lies far beneath her political accomplishments. It is the strength that she found within herself and her faith that carried her through life. We often times confuse the life of the “rich and famous” for a life of ease. Eleanor was more than a name, face, or a documentary topic she was a woman; a woman who faced the trials of life just as any other. She experienced the loss of both of her parents at a very young age, she lost a young child, she had a husband who didn’t always stand by her the way she stood by him, and was affected by disease. On a smaller scale, Eleanor had those days where her old faithful dress was just going to have to do, days that an egg sandwich was all that was on the dinner menu and days when a smile was hard to put on. Hard days do not have a preference as to whom they affect, fortunately, neither does happiness. Eleanor recognized this and allowed herself to take the good along with the bad and be shaped into one incredible woman. Words of Wisdom from Eleanor “A woman is like a tea bag-you can’t tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water.” “I think, at a child’s birth, if a mother could ask a fairy Godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity.” “It isn’t enough to talk about peace. One must believe in it. And it isn’t enough to believe in it. One must work at it.” “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

Hello everyone! I am Kaylyn McCarraher and I am spending this summer here with all of you as an intern for Sophie Woman’s Magazine. I am a sophomore at Western Carolina University as well as a Golden Leaf Scholar which lead me to this amazing opportunity. Behind the Name is my little contribution to Sophie which takes a deeper look into the lives of history’s most inspirational women. I hope you all enjoy! Sources “First Lady Biography:Eleanor Roosevelt.” First Ladies of the United States. National First Ladies’ Library, 2009. Web. 14 May 2012. <http://www.firstladies.org/biographies/>.

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 19


Dinner Diva The

10

By Leanne Ely CNC

Powerhouse Foods

There are foods that are foods that are healthy and then there are foods that are powerhouses. I’ve got ten here that are supersonic super foods that you absolutely should include in your diet if you want to lose weight, get as healthy as you can and look your best! Here they are: 1. Tomatoes. The all-powerful tomato can do all kinds of things, besides make your favorite spaghetti sauce. It’s rich in lycopene, an important nutrient that may lower the risk of all kinds of cancer, prostate included. Plus the vitamin C factor is an added bonus. 2. Greens. I love braised greens (steam them till bright green, then sauté in olive oil and garlic, put a lid on them and let them finish cooking after I turn off the heat). Any kind of green will do, from Swiss chard, to kale, to collard greens. They’re all delicious. I can eat 1/2 a pound in one sitting! 3. Almonds. I’m a huge fan of nuts, especially raw almonds (and walnuts, too). I place 10 of them in a napkin and munch them at my desk, lingeringly (it’s too easy to eat too many, so I measure them out). I take my time and they seem to last. I also make up little ziplock bags of almonds to have on hand. One bag of these nuts is always in my purse for an emergency snack! 4. Salmon. I absolutely adore grilled salmon. It’s gotta be WILD though, if you want the benefit of the omega 3 fatty acids (farm raised doesn’t cut it). My absolute fave is wild Alaskan Sockeye. I just had it for dinner tonight (with some braised greens) and I’m in love. I heat up the barbi (I have a gas one), throw the frozen salmon on, skin side down, sprinkle some salmon seasoning from Paul Prudhomme (generously, I might add) and that’s it! EASY BUTTON and absolutely delicious; no planning necessary! 5. Frozen berries. I make my smoothies from frozen berries every morning. I buy the wild blueberries and blackberry/raspberry mix. Blueberries

pg 20 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2012

are especially healthy and have more antioxidants in 2/3 of a cup than FIVE servings of broccoli! 6. Fermented Foods. It can be yogurt or kefir. Kefir is like liquid yogurt. Chocked full of probiotics, yogurt and kefir helps your body balance in the gut. Remember those stories of people living to be 120 years old in Russia? Yogurt and kefir were what they credit their longevity to; that’s nothing to sneeze at! If you need to go dairy free, you can enjoy kimchee or sauerkraut instead! 7. Onions. The lowly onion seems to find its way into most everything you make, especially come dinner time! Eating onions is a cheap way to get your flavonoids in; important nutrients that help protect your lungs from cancer and your gut from ulcers. Not only that, but they help prevent heart disease and raise the “good” cholesterol in your blood. 8. Oats. Fiber rich, oats help your body to stabilize blood sugar levels and reduce cholesterol. A perfect breakfast is a bowl of oatmeal with about 1/2 cup of frozen blueberries stirred in, yum! Fiber is critical for important bodily functions, if you know what I mean and oatmeal is a great way to get it. 9. Dark Chocolate. HALLELUJAH!!! At last, my dream came true! When some girls were singing, “someday my prince will come,” I was humming, “someday they’ll discover chocolate is healthy”. Well, I may not have gotten my prince charming (yet), but I can have my chocolate and eat it too! Dark chocolate is rich in catechins and flavonoids, giving you a big dose of antioxidants and helping to boost the good cholesterol, too. An ounce a day is more than adequate and it needs to be dark, the darker the better. 10. Oranges. While we may no longer suffer from scurvy, a lot of us have marginal levels of vitamin C in our blood and some of us have a deficit. When you consider the fact that oranges in their flavonoid richness have the ability to fend off cancer and cardiovascular disease and protect one’s DNA, it’s amazing that most of us aren’t chugging a glass each morning of OJ! Get the pulp-rich variety and you’ve got extra C to boot.

Want great recipes for these Powerhouse Foods? Try our Menu Mailer Subscription, new recipes each week in a variety of menu types, get yours today!

Leanne Ely is a New York Times bestselling author of Body Clutter and the Saving Dinner series. The Dinner Diva syndicated newspaper column appears in 250 newspapers nationwide. Learn how to cook great and save significant money with the Dinner Diva?s menus, recipes and shopping lists at www.savingdinner.com


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Sophisticated Women... By Nicole Greer, PPCC Founder and Principle Coach at Vibrant Coaching

Let’s get started! Just get on with it! Giddy up! Getter done! Instigate, inaugurate, initiate, originate, pollinate! Commence! Sophisticated women realize the world needs what motivational innovation guru Tom Peters calls in his book, Circle of Innovation, “get on with it people”. True sophisticated women don’t complain, groan and moan about the status quo. They lean into the issues that need attention and take responsibility to get things moving. The conversations that surround us are full of observations of what should be, could be, and why. The world is in a habitual rut I like to call the rearview mirror mode where individuals are always looking back and wishing things were different. I suggest that we stop wishing for the change we want to see in the world. Instead, let’s eradicate regrets by taking actions. Actions that will bridge the gap between impossible and plausible. Powerful Question: What are your complaints, issues, obstacles that are holding you back? Me? You ask. I gave up on blaming my childhood, my parent’s shortcomings, and my lack of money, time, and energy. Instead, I have commenced with getting my bachelors degree in Organizational Leadership. At forty-five, I have decided to go back to school. Why take on this goal now? Over the last five years, numerous doors have opened for me to work with amazing people. However, on more than one occasion, key decision makers found out I did not have the credentials they deemed necessary and the opportunity was lost. (I did not say that they thought I didn’t have the skills, ability, knowledge or enthusiasm!) They had standards I had to meet. They’re entitled. So, I decided that I would not allow my lack of formal education hold me back any longer. I decided to getter done! I am now a proud student and believe it or not the Ambassadorial Scholar of Mountain State University right here in North Carolina with a campus in both Hickory and Mooresville. I attend classes one night a week and will complete my degree within 2 years. I love the adult learning environment where I am part of a new family called a cohort seeking to not only improve

Commence

themselves but their work place, the Hickory/Mooresville/Lake Norman communities, and their future! You? I ask. What next right step do you need to initiate? Large or small you must address the possibilities in your life and take action to turn them in probabilities. The simple act of starting something often generates the energy necessary to instill the confidence to take another right step. Success breeds success. This past weekend, I had the privilege of watching my nephew, Zach, walk in the commencement ceremony at Appalachian State University. As I observed him cross the stage, I was thrilled for him. I was proud. I was excited about what his future holds. Most importantly, I could relate to the effort he applied for his own personal growth. I rest in the fact that he has developed expertise. I revel in the idea that he will never have to face the obstacle that has held me back. He has a key that will open the door of opportunity. I am filled with anticipation instead of regret that the same opportunity awaits me. What is ‘IT’ that you need to accomplish? It’s quite possible no one will drape honors cords around your neck, or holler your name from the stands of an auditorium and play pomp and circumstance when you enter the room. But if you just get on with ‘IT’, the ‘IT’ you know is holding you back, I guarantee, will allow you to experience the definition of pomp and circumstance: a splendid display and a magnificent show…of your capacity!

At its deepest level, working with a coach frees you to indentify your birthright gifts, discern your deepest passions, and fulfill your highest purpose. A coach can pry you off dead center. As Principal Coach for Vibrant Coaching and Workshop Leader for The Lydia Group, LLC, a collaboration of individuals focused on work, life and spiritual growth, Nicole is on a mission to impact, energize, and influence people to lead a Vibrant Life by engaging the possibilities. As a life and business coach and workshop leader, Nicole views her role as a conduit to release all that you want to achieve. Join me on the PATH to move forward with authenticity, skill and confidence. www.thevibrantcoach.com/www. thelydiagroup.com

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 23


Binge Cooking by Carol G. Stratton My family has a history of binge cooking. My family’s motto: “Forget the ordinary, the basic…shoot for the stars.” The more creative the meal, the better. It started with the Pillsbury Cook-Off. My mother had one dream: to win the contest Pillsbury Flour sponsored every year. She drooled at the prizes: a G.E. electric range, a new wardrobe and a trip to Washington D.C. to compete with one hundred other finalists for the final award. It seemed a faraway dream until our neighbor, Mary Olsen, became a semi-finalist. Suddenly the dreams of a distant possibility became a local reality. We cheered on our almost-famous neighbor in hopes her kitchen magic would hit the big time. She was our very own American Idol. My mother and my sister would visit her as she cooked, scrutinizing her every move in the kitchen while she perfected her German cookie recipe. When she returned without the ultimate prize but with the fabulous range, we welcomed her home like an Olympic medalist. In those days replacing your kitchen stove was akin to remodeling one’s kitchen. In the aftermath of the big contest, my mother and Mary put their heads together to decide what made her Pffernuisse cookies so unique. What was the ingredient that charmed the judges’ palates enough to offer her a prize for her recipe? “It’s your special spice, anise,” my mother pointed her finger in the air with the conviction of a true flavor artisan. Thus entered the era of the post-bakeoff-post mortems. Going through several five pound bags of the designated contest flour, Mom baked up a storm for a full week. Each day after fifth grade, I came home to fruit bread, muffins, custard pies, iced pound cakes and rolled out cookies. It seemed like a childhood dream to have these baked goods hot out of the oven. But the dream was lost on me. On Friday of that week, I dumped my books on the kitchen table, pushing aside a fragrant pile of cookies chocked full of nuts and chocolate chips. “Don’t you have anything else to eat?” I pleaded with my mother. “Are you kidding, it’s like you live in a bakery. Why wouldn’t any child love coming home to their choice of any treat on the planet?” “Why?” I said, and paused. “Well, I didn’t want to hurt your feelings but I hate licorice anise flavoring! The binge cooking tradition continued with my becoming a newlywed. Marrying a salesman who traveled and ate out a lot, I felt the need to impress my new husband with my culinary expertise. No basic casseroles

pg 24 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2012

for him, I thought. He’s used to gourmet meals. I searched through my newly acquired kitchen gadgets and came up with not one but three crepe makers. Crepes sound so, well French, and after all the French are great cooks. How many wives would spend the time creating crepes? I’ll bowl him over tonight, I thought as I ladled out the batter into the hot frying pan. Thus began the crepe episode. I cooked Seafood Crepes for dinner. The next night I slipped in Ratatouille Crepes for a side dish and finished up with Orange Cream crepes for dessert. I even went beyond the call of duty and got up early to produce a luscious Breakfast Crepe, full of bacon, eggs and mushrooms with a delicate dill cream sauce to go over the top. I felt pretty smug about the food part of our marriage. Friday night rolled around. I had Crepes Burgundy: light on the beef, heavy on the onions and mushrooms, very delicate and light. I hovered over my new husband.” Well aren’t these delicious?” I heard nothing but the cuckoo clock ticking. A dog barked down the road and a car drove by with a Bee Gees song blaring from the radio. Inside, my husband lowered his head, looked at me with those big round brown French eyes that I fell in love with and said in a timid voice,” Honey can’t we just have some hamburgers?” He looked so pathetically hungry. I didn’t realize in my attempt to woo him with my cooking skills I had been starving him. “Coming right up. I’ll crank up the stove.” You’ve never seen such a look of relief as passed across that poor man’s face. No more secret runs to McDonald’s at ten o’clock at night. My oldest daughter just got married a few years ago. I was tempted to offer lectures full of the wisdom I’d gained-pertinent advice for a newlywed. “Don’t go to bed angry, stick to a budget” …all the things she needed to hear. But it came to me how the most helpful advice might be: no binge cooking. Stick to meat and potatoes and find out if he likes licorice flavored baked goods. I’ve learned the hard way; boring works. Carol has been a freelance writer for several years and has a website to help women cope with relocating, www.ChangingZipCodes.com. Her book, Changing Zip Codes- Finding Community Wherever You’re Transplanted will be published by Christian Devotions in association with Lighthouse Publishing of the Carolinas in March. It is a forty-day devotional for those relocating and those seeking community.


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Me, Myself, & . c In By Sherré DeMao

Is What You Can’t Do Consuming You?

Are you feeling limited or frustrated by all that you want to achieve and yet not feeling as though anything is progressing? Do you feel that several factors or your current circumstance are getting in the way of you realizing your ultimate dreams? When frustration hits, it is because the focus is being placed almost entirely on all that cannot be done, what you feel that you can’t do, or what feels as though is out of your control. When your mind gets caught up in the “can’t,” it can be doubly hard to feel as though you can do anything to get things moving again in the right direction. The reality is that you can do a lot more than you realize. It starts with shifting from focusing on what you can’t do or don’t have control over to what you can do, no matter how small of an action it may be. The real shift from can’t to can occurs when you begin to make it a habit to have a CAN DO attitude no matter what gets thrown at you. A while ago, I gave additional meaning to having a Can Do attitude to help inspire me. I created a meaning around the acronym, CAN DO: Conscientious Action Nurtures Desired Outcome. Consider what this could mean for you to help you get back on track towards realizing your dreams. C = Conscientious: Being conscientious about what you are striving to do means you are being intentional about it in everything that you do. It is not something you are going to get around to doing. It is something you believe is so important and will bring such value to you and others that it is worth being top of mind and at the forefront of your priorities in making it happen. You think about it every day and what can be done to take you a step closer to where you want to be. A = Action: You can think all you want, but without “conscientious action” it will just remain in the “want to do” category instead of the “getting to do” realm. Once you bring what you want into a conscientious state of being, you then also need to attach that awareness and intent with real action. Don’t let the dream itself overwhelm or intimidate you. Instead, allow it to inspire you to identify small actions you can take each and every day. Is it getting more information? Is it learning something? Is it connecting with someone? Breaking down the big dream into small steps towards achieving it will make it not only seem more real, but also more achievable. N = Nurtures: By taking conscientious action every day, you are nurturing your dream by making progress of some kind every day. But it also means that you are nurturing and taking care of yourself by giving yourself permission to put some of your energy every day towards what you desire most in your life or work to happen. Nurturing is caring … caring about you … caring about your future … and caring about others who may benefit from this dream and desire becoming reality.

D = Desired: Another reason we can feel so frustrated in life or work is because we are spending most of our time doing what we really don’t want to be doing. Why is this? When you take conscientious action nurturing what you truly desire, you also find that you are truly enjoying the journey in getting there. You are feeling more satisfied even before you realize the full outcome because you are doing what you really want to be doing and it feels more fulfilling. Take an honest look at what you truly desire as it relates to your goal, and it will make it that much easier to identify the actions you need to take on an ongoing basis to get you where you want to go. O = Outcome: Once you achieve this goal, realize this dream or desire you have, what will be the outcome? What will it ultimately mean to you and for others in your life? If you don’t fully know the answer to this, then this could also be a part of your problem. Being able to envision what your life and work will be like after you achieve what you want to achieve helps make it more real and more tangible. It also helps you better identify opportunities and make better decisions because you understand what it will mean for you in the end.

Having a can-do attitude means that you believe in what you are doing and the impact it will have in your life, work and for others as well. You are unstoppable because you believe in options, possibilities, opportunities and your own ability to make things happen. Some days, your action may just be taking a few meditative moments to re-engage your vision so you can refocus your action to allow you to process and best choose your next best steps. Other days, you will have a variety of actions moving your dream forward. The most important thing is to keep what you want most to happen in your life or work top of mind and within your heart. Start each day focused on what you CAN DO, and before you know it, you will be doing and enjoying all that you hoped you could be doing.

Bio: Sherré DeMao inspires millions through her monthly columns, weekly Insight eZine and national contributing writing. An expert strategist and marketer focused on entrepreneurs, her unique perspective and innovative approach has earned numerous awards regionally, nationally and internationally including being named among the Top 50 Enterprising Women of North America in 2007. Her books, Me, Myself & Inc. (www.memyselfandinc.com) and 50 Marketing Secrets (www.50marketingsecrets.com) have received national acclaim as Top Business Shelf picks and must reads.

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 27


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pg 28 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2012


Annie Oakley, Calamity Jane and…..Judy Who? By Judy Smith “I grew up in my saddle, my play toy was a gun, Shooting at the rattlesnakes was my idea of fun.” Those are some words to an old cowboy song that I doubt fits many people today. Certainly not me. Even when I was young, the cap pistols that all little boys played with scared me. My brothers knew if they could sneak up behind me and shoot that gun, I would jump out of my skin. I didn’t like guns, never wanted one in my house and never thought about shooting rattlesnakes or anything else for fun. Until….a couple of years ago, when my son-in-law, Randy, showed me a small gun he bought. It got me thinking that maybe I needed a gun just in case. I would not take this lightly, though. If I was going to purchase a gun, I was going to learn the right way and I was going to be able to hit the mark. I signed up for a concealed weapon class, not really sure why I chose that particular one, but thought it was a good idea at the time. Not wanting to purchase a gun till after I had some good information and felt like I could shoot a gun, my son-in-law let me borrow his “broken” 22. I gave up a whole Saturday for this class. They taught us some gun basics and about concealed weapons and off to the range we went. Unfortunately, the 22 I was using kept jamming up. Every time the instructor walked by he had to un-jam it and kept showing me how to cock it, assuming it was all my wrong doing. Finally, he decided to shoot the gun for himself and oh my, can you believe it, it jammed on him! Several times. So I did not get to shoot much that day although I have to admit I was secretly

very happy the gun jammed with him. Now I know what I have to do. Go buy my own gun and find somewhere to learn how to shoot my gun. With Randy’s help, we went gun shopping and I purchased a gun. All I had to do now was find a place to practice. Well, I have had that gun for almost two years and never found a place I felt comfortable enough to go shooting so, I just gave up on the idea. Until recently. Someone told me about Point Blank Range, in Mooresville and their “Women On Target” shooting program. I checked into the class and what it was about and this sounded like what I was looking for. It is a self-paced program that is a version of the Winchester/NRA Marksmanship Qualification Program. In addition to offering shooting instructions from NRA Certified instructors, women are allowed to socialize with other women of all levels and to hang out in the Patriot Gun Club Lounge. If you read any of my articles, you know I have breast cancer and am in a really sick cycle right now. One thing you are urged to do when you are going through chemo is do something that you have fun at. I am thrilled it is self-paced and I don’t know how long it will take me, but I can assure you I am having a blast. At Point Blank Range, I have no reservations about walking in by myself and getting the help I need. All of this at a first rate place that any woman would feel comfortable and welcomed! How am I shooting? Give me a few more weeks and I will meet you at the range for a showdown….with targets of course! Interested in joining me? You can get more information by going to their website at www.pointblankrange.com

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 29


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RefeRRals NecessaRy foR PsychiatRy aPPoiNtmeNts • accePtiNg most majoR iNsuRaNce, iNcludiNg medicaRe pg 30 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2012


esign D

REAL

FOR THE

by Susan Guest, ASID

Years ago when I was newly married, I tried to disguise one of my husband’s hideous chairs with a home-made slip cover using a sheet and rope. This “creation” looked great the first week-very hip and trendy with the shabby- chic look that was so popular then. A month later I hated to look at the chair because it was tacky and lacked the quality that I was accustomed to. This design would have been praised on a TV show like “Design Star”, but not in my real world on a daily basis. Another time, I hand-painted the tile in my bathroom with cheap paint and no “firing” process that is used at the tile manufacturing plant to enable the paint to last. My design started chipping off the tile after only a short time. Great idea at the time, but the look did not last. I have pulled architectural antiques out of dumpsters, brought broken items home from design showrooms that had discarded them, and refinished furniture that was salvaged. It is a dangerous thing to be a designer with a lot of creativity, a love of experimenting, and a tight budget! Many of us watch design shows on TV. Not only are they entertaining, they are also informative. I’ve gotten some great budget ideas made from everyday, inexpensive items. However, like my slipcover, some of these ideas are great for short term solutions, but do not stand the test of time. Many TV shows are made for entertainment value and do not depict real world scenarios. For example, a room that was completed with only $300 might not include the real labor costs. The behind -the -scenes staff of the show that make everything happen are often invisible to the viewers. The show can be edited to look like the project was completed in a much shorter time than it really was. Also, two years later, the stars of the show do not come back to the home to see how the designs function and if the clients are still happy. Items on the TV shows look great in an overall room, but may not look as nice or function as well in a real situation. Many of the rooms are stylish, but do not suit the personality of the real life client. The furniture, on some of these programs, is located in a store in the area and delivered immediately. In real life, furniture that is not main-stream or the latest fashion may not be readily available. For instance, if you desire a pastel floral or a contemporary orange leather sofa, you will most likely have to order. Made -to -order furniture may take the standard 6 to 8 weeks or even longer. Companies that once carried large inventories of fabrics can no longer afford to stock every fabric

World

and thus, back orders are common. The fabric back orders may delay the furniture more. So how do you navigate the TV shows and all the creative things that you learned? How do you apply the cool ideas into your own home? The best situation for you is to glean ideas from the shows and incorporate them into your own personal style. Your money is best spent buying the best quality to suit your situation and budget. If you plan to keep an item for years such as a dining table, you might need to splurge on this item. Other items might have short-term use like for a college dorm room. Furnishings for this might be found in a consignment store, a yard sale, or on-line discount source and then donated when you no longer need them. If you simply cannot afford something, don’t buy a cheap item if you can possibly save your pennies and purchase better quality later. The land fields are full of junk that has been discarded and should have never been purchased in the first place. My quality pieces of furniture that I bought years ago are still being used today. The cheap impulse pieces that were not made well, did not last long. Enjoy the design shows as I do. But remember, they have been made for entertainment value and may not tell the whole story. Let them inspire your creative juices, but not hamper your reasoning process. If you have nothing to lose by trying an idea that you saw on a program, give it a try. If you are like most of us and do not have tons of disposable income, save your money until you can complete a project with the best quality. Otherwise, you might have to live with your mistake longer than you’d like and get a permanent snarl on your face!

Susan Guest, ASID is an award-winning interior designer in Hickory and owner of Guest Interiors, LLC. She is one of the designers featured in “Spectacular Homes of the Carolinas”, found in high-end bookstores around the country. For more information, visit www.guestinteriors.com.

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 31


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Recipes for ife

L

by Emily Wickham

Food for the Body

Mandarin Orange Salad (Recipe from Connie Todd via family friend) ¼ cup olive oil ¼ cup cider vinegar 2 Tbsp. sugar ½ tsp. salt 4 dashes Tabasco sauce ¼ cup sliced almonds ½ head Romaine lettuce ½ head Iceberg lettuce 11 oz. Mandarin oranges 2 green onions, sliced 1 Tbsp. poppy seeds Mix the first five ingredients in a large salad bowl. Sauté almonds in butter or margarine on medium-low heat – be careful not to burn. Add remaining ingredients; toss thoroughly. Top with almonds and serve. Note: I prefer canola oil rather than the olive oil, and I usually use approximately 1 Tbsp. diced yellow onion instead of green onion.

A Prayer for God’s Blessing Loving Father in heaven, You are the one true God – perfect in every way. Thank You for drawing me into relationship with You through Your beloved Son, the Lord Jesus Christ. Please increase my understanding of Your immense character so I can appreciate and worship You more fully. In Jesus’ precious and holy name, Amen.

Food for the Soul “Just try it … you might like it!” My husband grew up eating salad as a side dish almost every evening for dinner, and we often enjoy it in our home now. Even though I don’t delight in washing and spinning lettuce leaves or chopping vegetables, the result always exceeds the effort. Yet the first time I made Mandarin Orange Salad, Mark wasn’t so sure about it. He didn’t necessarily favor mixing salty and sweet ingredients. However, he quickly adapted and the rest is history. He’s the first to say that this recipe tastes delicious.

There’s something about an unusual combination of edible items that can make us resistant. Especially children. They can be so particular about the looks and textures of food. Sometimes this ends up causing embarrassment when visiting others’ homes and our child doesn’t want to eat what’s served. Awkward … you know what I mean. If they’d only try it, they might like it. The same type of mindset can also be applied to our view of the living God. His character far surpasses anything our minds can conceive; yet we sometimes resist a close relationship with Him because we don’t like all of His characteristics. For example, we especially might be drawn to His love, but not willing to accept His hatred of sin. Or, we might esteem God’s righteousness so highly that we fail to recognize His grace. Either way, these viewpoints limit our understanding of God. They cause us to miss the fullness of His identity and subsequently define Him the way we want … the way that feels right and comfortable to us. Fortunately, defining God on our own terms simply won’t work – He is who He is. Hebrews 1:1 – 3 states, “God … in these last days has spoken to us in His Son … And He is the radiance of His glory and the exact representation of His nature, and upholds all things by the word of His power. When He had made purification of sins, He sat down at the right hand of the Majesty on high”. If we want to know God accurately, Christ is the answer. In Him we see a completely sinless Man who felt compassion for sinners. We observe a loving Lord who exercised authority yet also humbly submitted to authority. Christ came as God in the flesh and perfectly revealed God’s nature. Though we might struggle at times with certain aspects of God’s character, we can rest assured that He is flawless. “He is the Rock, his works are perfect, and all his ways are just. A faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just is he” (Deuteronomy 32:4). A lifetime isn’t long enough for us to know God entirely. But because of Christ’s death on the cross and His glorious resurrection, we can place our faith in Him as our Savior and begin an eternal discovery of His matchless qualities. By studying the Bible, praying, and experiencing God’s work in our lives, we’ll “taste and see that the LORD is good …” (Psalm 34:8). A genuine relationship with God through the Lord Jesus Christ will never disappoint. There will be hard times, yes. But as you get to know Him more and more, you’ll not only like Him … you’ll love Him! Until next time, that’s a Recipe for Life …

Emily Wickham, published author, speaker, and founder of Proclaiming Him to Women Ministries, gently yet powerfully presents God’s Word. She encourages and equips women by exalting Christ through inspirational, practical Bible teaching. Visit www.proclaiminghimtowomen.com to share your thoughts about this article and to read Emily’s blog devotionals. Also, please consider attending her upcoming women’s conference, the Connecting with Christ Conference, scheduled for September 28 – 29 in the Greensboro, NC area. (See Web site for more details.) Emily welcomes speaking opportunities at women’s events such as retreats, luncheons, and conferences. Please e-mail emily@proclaiminghimtowomen.com. Emily resides in western NC with her husband and their four children.

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg33


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We long for a garage to park our cars, create a tool bench for crafts, and store ®away a few itemsSave that we wantwindow in our homes. Somewhere ondon’t stylish fashions that helpRepeat sorting and categorizing -- it will go a lot quicker this time! Vignette Modern ® Save on stylish window fashions that31. help Vignette Modern Roman Shades insulate your home, now through March along the way garages became the long, lost forgotten “room” in our Roman Shades insulate your home, now through March 31. LEFT? Clean anything that you want to keep. Map out WHATS house. We use it as a storage shed. We neglect it and pile it full of stuff! where it will go in the garage. The goal is to get stuff off the floor and Pile and stuff, pile and forget. What is the purpose of a garage? Protect your car from weather. up on the wall!

Store stuff like tools, potting soil and planters, car detailing solutions. But is the purpose of a garage to become a storage unit? My guess is no. How manysettimes doIf youyou drive through your neighborhood on a beautimodels set forth above in the quantities forth above. purchase less than the Prepaidset Reward ©2011 Hunter Douglas. rightsIfreserved. All trademarks xpress models product forth Card. above in the quantities set forthAllabove. you purchase lessneighbors than the ful Saturday morning, wave to the as they mow the lawn, and merican Express Prepaid Reward Card. ©2011 Hunter Douglas. All rights reserved. All trademarks gawk at all the stuff crammed in their garage! Those doors flung open 11/30/11 so the men of the house can spend12:14 the PM day “getting things done”. By the 11/30/11 12:14 PM looks of things, they need to clean out that garage!

Tools: • Buy or make a work bench. A sturdy table and bar stool will be a lifesaver. • Hang or store tools either on a rack or in a tool box • Pegboard is not recommended for garages. If they get wet, then they will fall apart. All that work and money down the drain! • Hang a shelf up high to store seasonal items like holiday decoraed as a purchase of any of the product models set forth above in the quantities set forth above. If you purchase less than the tions or potting soil Do you really need to ®store allforth ofabove that stuff? Prepaid Card.in©2011 Hunterset Douglas. All rights reserved. All less trademarks U.S. dollars, form ofofanany American Expressmodels is defi ned asinathe purchase of the product setReward the quantities forth above. If you purchase than the ® • Use a ladder to get to these items when needed ued in U.S. dollars, in the form of an American Express Prepaid Reward Card. ©2011 Hunter Douglas. All rights reserved. All trademarks • Rakes, shovels, brooms • DECIDE: What do you want to do with your garage • Hang these on the wall with secure “U” hooks. Make sure the hook • IDENTIFY: 4-5 purposes for the garage. 11/30/11 12:14 PM is in aPM stud! 11/30/11 12:14 1. Park the car ®

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Garage Cleaning Weekend • • • • •

Take everything out of the garage Clean the floor, walls, etc This would be a great time to paint if you want to liven up the space SORT: Everything that you took out by category Throw away anything that is: 1. Broken 2. Rusty

Product suggestions • Tracking systems - Most stores sell these (Lowe’s, Home Depot, The Container Store) They can be pricey if you go with big cabinets or decide to cover your entire garage with tracks. • Toolboxes (if you have a lot of different tools) • Solid wood shelving • Particleboard or melamine can warp or crack • Shelves, shelves, shelves - Metal, plastic, or solid wood will hold up nicely. Freestanding shelves are quick and easy. Customized shelving is ideal but can be more time consuming • Bulldog “U” hooks, bike hooks, and ladder supports • Clear shoeboxes - To store those odds and ends -- be sure to label the box

Jennifer Burnham Pure & Simple Organizing

www.facebook.com/PureandSimpleOrg

www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 35


TRUTH

& BEAUTY

by Teresa Pope, Esthetician Question: I am a frequent user of tanning beds. And yes! I am aware of all the terrible things it does to your skin, but I was wondering; Can tanning beds hurt your hair? Answer: ABSOLUTELY!! Tanning beds are as bad for your hair as they are for your skin, and unlike our skin, which gives us signals that we have overdone the tanning, by turning red and burning, our hair just lays there and takes the abuse. That is until it is too late. Tanning beds rob your hair of moisture, making it dry, brittle and frizzy. The exposure to the UVA and UVB light sources will also fade your color, especially if your hair is color treated or highlighted. Blonde’s will get brassy, reds will fade, browns will turn mousy. Also unlike your skin that sheds daily, helping it to recover from the tanning process, your hair will take years to grow to replace it’s length. So, if you must use tanning beds, cover your hair with a towel to protect it from the harmful rays. If you have the time, apply a deep conditioner before covering with the towel. The heat from the tanning bed will act as a “hooded dryer” to help the condition penetrate the hair shaft. Hair does not have to be wet to apply deep conditioner, if fact the hair will absorb more product if it isn’t full of water. There are also products to protect your hair from sun exposure and heat, I would recommend that you use one of those products while in the tanning bed and the natural sun.

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pg 36 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2012

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Cruising is the No-Work Vacation

People who are looking for a laid-back and fuss-free vacation can turn to cruising. Cruising remains popular and that popularity continues to grow. Data from the Cruise Line International Association, Inc. market profile survey for 2011 found that cruising ranks second as the most popular vacation behind land-based nonresort vacations. Almost 71 percent of the total vacation market has an interest in cruising. Among past cruisers, survey respondents said they will most likely take another cruise over the next three years. CLIA research indicates that cruisers tend to be middle-aged, predominantly married couples with a median income of $97,000. The higher household income may account for the ability to cruise amid a floundering economy. What’s behind the popularity of cruising? One of the main draws to cruising is its relative ease. From the moment a ship embarks, cruisers are aboard a floating hotel. All of their needs are met within the confines of the ship, and there’s no hassle with baggage or layovers like there is for air travel. There’s also no traffic on the open seas, and cruisers can customize their days and do as little or as much as they like. The all-inclusive nature of cruising extends to meals. A popular factor of cruising is that one needn’t look far for the next meal. Unlike other hotels and resorts, there’s no traveling far for breakfast, lunch or dinner, and passengers don’t have to carry around extra money for meal expenses. Cruise packages often include all-you-can-eat options. This can seem like a bargain, as the cost of meals on other vacations tends to

be a significant. According to Ehow.com, vacationers spend upwards of $600 in food for a week-long vacation. In comparison, cruising costs on average $1,500 per person, which covers the accommodations, meals, some excursions, and onboard activities. Travelers who are not interested in planning a day-to-day itinerary to keep busy often like the amenities of cruising. Most cruises have a cruise director who leads guests in various activities during the day. Most modern-day cruise ships offer ample entertainment options. From swimming pools to skating rinks to rock walls to surfing simulators, there are activities for most age groups. For an additional cost, cruisers can leave the ship and go on specialized excursions at ports of call. Still, cruisers who just want to sit on deck and relax can do just that. Because most cruise ships travel in international waters, they are not governed by the rules of the land. For example, gambling is often legal aboard ships when they are out of port. Cruising remains one of the most popular types of vacations. And since CLIAsays that many people still book cruise vacations through a travel agent, cruising may be one of the easiest vacations to plan and enjoy. Simply pack a suitcase and set sail.

Cruising is one of the least labor-intensive vacations for travelers.

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www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 37


Keeping the

Memories

If you can’t save your whole bouquet, save a flower from it. Save snippets of ribbon and bits of your wedding gown if it was altered. And there are never enough pictures. Take a camera with you as you leave to document those who are left behind. Chapter 7. Honeymoon. Totally yours to do with as you please. Just make sure these memories are preserved too. Chapter 8. It’s up to you. Could be the birth of your first child or move to a new home or city.

by Mackey Carpenter

Did your mom make a baby book for you, or maybe a scrapbook of sorts of your achievements? Well this is not about scrap booking, but it does tend to have a few similarities. We are going to set about making a memory book of your wedding. Now it really doesn’t have to be in book form, it could be in a box, or even a small trunk . And I’m not talking about the book you buy that gives you pages to write in the info. This is different. If you decide to do a box, make sure it’s large enough to hold several smaller boxes. And label everything. There are a few rules, the first being you make copies of important papers, letters, poems and keep the originals in a safe place. An acid free box should be used for all the originals. Any object with dimension should be photographed and the original carefully wrapped (preferably in acid-free paper) and tucked away. Chapter 1. How did you meet? What is your first memory? Who were your friends at the time? All of these things should be documented, written down. Doesn’t have to be anything fancy. In fact, the more simple, the better. I’ve seen phone numbers written on napkins and one of the latest is asking someone out by email. Print it out and tuck it away. It might prove to be valuable. Chapter 2. The dating process. Where did you go? What did you eat? It may sound stupid now but later it will give you a great laugh. Collect the menus of you favorite places. Or maybe a menu of the weirdest place the two of you ate. Have the waiter take a photo of both of you, or if you’re with friends, all of you. Photos of the events you attended together, like company picnics, anything that was special (or sometimes not) for you. Chapter 3. The proposal. This can be very cheesy and totally offthe-wall and has to be carefully documented. This is the one you will tell to your grandchildren. (Along with how you met.) If he proposes in a park, take pictures of course, but also take maybe a leaf, flower or something that is there at that moment. (Legal, of course.) Chapter 4. Family. Maybe you have already met his family. Possibly your first date was set up by his sister or your brother. Possibly you’ve known each other for years and just reconnected. This will be a very important part of your marriage. Chapter 5. The month prior to the wedding. This may sound like an unusual chapter to put here, but it is one of the busiest months of your life. So much goes on the month before a wedding that, unless you document it, later you will find it hard to believe it all happened. This is when the details take shape, the post-it notes are everywhere and yes, there will be unhappiness at times. But after it’s all over, you’ll sit back Chapter 6. Wedding Day. The culmination of everything. This is truly the first day of the rest of your lives. All of the above are just memories (carefully documented) and are there for your future.

pg 38 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | June 2012

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Our Monthly Feature

shutterbuggerz

Photos from our May 2012 Contest.

Photo Submitted By: Chasidy Bean

Local Photos of Everyday people, places, and events as seen through the eyes of the area's professional and amateur photographers!

s h u t t e r b u g g e r z . c o m www.shutterbuggerz.com

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Photo Submitted By: Elizabeth Sweet Photography

Photo Submitted By: Kimberly Michael Photography Photo Submitted By: Kolleen Taylor Photography

2010_Sophie_Ad_11-3-10.pdf

11/3/10

4:21:52 PM

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Photo Submitted By: Limelight Photography Visit the website to view all the photos to enter your photo into next month’s contest. pg 40 | Sophie Woman’s Magazine | Juneand 2012 40


Photo Submitted By: Cooper Photography

Photo Submitted By: Michelle Hrin Photography

Photo Submitted By: Elizabeth Sweet Photography

Photo Submitted By: Melissa Cockman Photography www.shutterbuggerz.com www.sophiewomansmagazine.com | pg 41 41


Photo Submitted By: Heather Renee Photography

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42

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Photo Submitted By: Michelle Hrin Photography

Photo Submitted By: Kim Burns

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Photo Submitted By: Chase Reynolds

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44

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Photo Submitted By: Cooper Photography


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Photo Submitted By: Amber Griffin

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To Submit, Vote, & View PHotos

Photo Submitted By: Felix Giuffrida

46

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Girlfriends Girlfriends In God ~ In God ~ The PowerThe of Quiet Power of Quiet | Page 19 | Page 19

“Changes”~ “Changes”~ Dealing Dealing with My Postpartum with My Postpartum Depression Depression | Page 7 | Page 7

ReachingReaching Your Full Your Full Potential ~ Potential How ~ How you see yourself you seewill yourself will determine determine who you who you become (Part become 2) (Part 2) | Page 12 | Page 12

ReachingReaching Your FullYour Full Potential Potential ~ The Lazy ~ The Lazy Woman’s Woman’s Guide To Guide To Achievement Achievement | Page 12 | Page 12

Sounds ofSounds Silence: of Silence: The Lesson The in Lesson the Lossin the Loss | Page 28 | Page 28

A Mom’s A Dream Mom’s ~ Dream ~ How I wasHow influenced I was influenced by a teacher by ayears teacher afteryears after 23 school | Page school | Page 23

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