She Magazine—Jan '15

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director’s chair

It’s 30 degrees outside right now. Yeah, that’s what I said, 30 degrees. Remember, I am a Florida girl, where 75 degrees means people are putting on heavy jackets, so I am not used to real winter weather. I’m pacing around in the driveway in North Carolina, half-frozen, trying to break through another bout of writer’s block. Fifteen minutes of pacing later and I’ve come up with one thing: Carrie Bradshaw carried a fanny pack. Sure, it was pink and sparkly, but it was still a fanny pack. I’m not talking about Gladys down at the Senior Center. I’m talking about Carrie-Sex and the City-Bradshaw. Trendsetter. Fashionista. Manolo Blahnik-obsessed voice of women across the world. And she carried a fanny pack. Many years ago, a few years after I had become a writer with a monthly column, there was the point when I considered either writing a novel or putting together an anthology of my columns and publishing it as a book. At that time in my life, like Carrie Bradshaw, I was a voice for the new generation. My finger was on the pulse of what was today’s world, what women of my community wanted, what they hoped to achieve and where those successes might take them. I knew the things they thought about. I knew the kinds of things that got them riled up and ready for action, and the kinds of things that made them want to kick back and enjoy an evening. Now, well some days, not so much. At times, I wonder if I could ever consider writing a novel again, when I seem to have a hard time just coming up with what to put in a monthly column. Twenty years is a long time. It’s a long time to be in any business. It’s a long time to try to continue to be fresh and current with the world around you. The distance between almost 30 and almost 50, while it may seem like it was just yesterday, is really quite vast. In that time, so much can change. People—relationships, friendships, coworkers—come and go. Priorities change. Things that seemed so important, so life shattering then, seem so miniscule now, and the things that matter so much now, back then would have seemed unfathomable. There are times when I wonder if maybe my viewpoint has become obsolete. Maybe those 20 years have changed me too much, made me too set in my ways and opinions, to continue to be a trendsetter. I wonder sometimes if maybe the time has come for me to move on and do something else. I think about women like Jennifer Knapp, our cover story. Here’s a woman who is part of a growing community of gay people who have been very vocal about their religious beliefs, as well as their right to be practicing people of faith. She faced a difficult decision in coming out, while at a high in her career in Christian music. Yet, she did it anyway. Jennifer is the trendsetter of today. She is a voice for the new generation. Then, I think about women like Suzanne Westenhoefer and Michelle Balan. These women have been in their careers for as long as I have, if not longer. Yet they have found the distance between almost 30 and almost 50 to be easily surmountable. Both of these women were trendsetters years ago, being out on a national level, risking popularity and success of career. Yet, they did it anyway. All these years later, you can still find them traveling the world and being a voice for women. They are still current. They are still fresh. And they, in their own careers as comics, are still great writers. I guess it all goes back to Carrie and that fanny pack. Back then, in the late 90’s, it was fashionable to sport that fanny pack. And all these years later, my almost 30, openly gay nephew wears one all the time. Sure, it’s pink and sparkly, but as long as he doesn’t wear it with the Manolo Blahniks, that fanny pack is totally now. And if a fanny pack can be totally fresh again, then so can I. See you next month.

Tina Sordellini Managing Executive Editor

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MANAGING EXECUTIVE EDITOR Tina Sordellini PUBLICITY SHE ESPAÑOL EXECUTIVE EDITOR Maria Espinal ASSOCIATE EDITORS Marissa Cohen • Shawn Nicholson Denise Warner • Donna Woessner CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Marissa Cohen • Verónica Espinal The Village Sage • Miriam Cronkhite Tina Sordellini • Denise Warner CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Verónica Espinal • Yadira Claralt Shawn Nicholson • Angie Sowers Juan Saco Mironoff • Boi-Photography SALES ASSOCIATES Maria Espinal • Diana Price Marissa Cohen• Donna Woessner ads@shemag.com DISTRIBUTION JR Davis • Randy Justice SUBSCRIPTIONS www.shemag.com EDITORIAL OFFICE 6511 Nova Drive, #173 • Davie, FL 33317 954.354.9751 office info@shemag.com • www.shemag.com

SHE: WOMEN OWNED, WOMEN OPERATED, WOMEN EMPOWERED! The ideas and opinions expressed in She Magazine do not necessarily reflect opinions of Shemag, L.L.C., She Magazine, or of editors or staff. Publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization should not be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of that person or organization. All advertising subject to approval by She Magazine. She Magazine/Shemag, L.L.C. is not responsible for unauthorized use or copyright infringement as present in camera ready, client provided ads, nor is it liable for any loss or suit arising from submitted advertisement, copy, photography, or artwork. Reproduction of She Magazine, in whole or in part, is strictly prohibited without the express written consent of Shemag, L.L.C.

1/2/2015 12:36:10 PM


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january 2015 / VOLUME 16 / ISSUE 12

IN THIS ISSUE

14

16 features

16 JENNIFER KNAPP “The belief you hold doesn’t make you a Christian, it just lets people know what kind of Christian you are.”

20 SUZANNE WESTENHOEFER

“Saying to me, ‘Please don’t mention this in your act,’ pretty much guarantees it’s going to end up as my big closer.”

21 TOP 5 FREEDOM TO MARRY MOMENTS

The conversation about the freedom to marry and gay people is now underway in every corner of the country.

22 MICHELLE BALAN

“I can tell you that this industry is not only hard for women, but even harder for women over 30. I am grateful that I have a steady career.”

departments

06 DIRECTOR’S CHAIR 10 MULTIMEDIA 14 IN THE NEWS 19 SHE GIRL 2014 She Girl Recap

26 ON THE SHELVES 26 ARCHIVES 30 SCOPES

22

she espaÑol 24 NOTICIAS Entérate lo que sucede en nuestros países.

25 SOY MUJER

photos 04 SHE SCENE 1 12 OLIVIA CRUISE 27 SHE SCENE 2

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20

>> READ OUR FREE DIGITAL EDITION AT WWW.SHEMAG.COM

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MULTIMEDIA

with Marissa Cohen

K.Michelle’s Anybody Wanna Buy a Heart debuted at #1 on iTunes’ R&B/Soul chart, #6 on Billboard Top 200, and #2 on Billboard’s R&B/Hip-Hop chart. Following the smash releases of singles “Maybe I Should Call,” “Something About the Night,” and “Love ‘Em All,” K.Michelle’s album is breaking all kinds of records, with USA Today calling “Drake Would Love Me” a “big stadium R&B ballad.” K. Michelle also just wrapped the smash hit series, K. Michelle: My Life on VH1. Available now.

Marvel’s Agent Carter premieres on ABC on Tuesday, January 6 (8 pm EST). Peggy Carter (Hayley Atwell), who lost the love of her life, Captain America, finds herself marginalized when the men return from WWII. Undaunted, Peggy embarks on a double life, doing administrative work and going on covert missions for the Strategic Scientific Reserve, the predecessor to S.H.I.E.L.D. With Meagen Fay, Lyndsy Fonseca, James D’Arcy.

The always amazing Julianne Moore stars as the title character in Still Alice. Based on the Lisa Genova novel, Still Alice follows Dr. Alice Howland, a renowned Columbia psychologist diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s disease. Kristen Stewart, Kate Bosworth and Hunter Parrish play her kids, while Alec Baldwin plays her medical researcher husband. With Shane McRae, Victoria Cartagena. In theaters Jan. 16.

Happy End stars Sinha Gierke as Lucca, an aspiring law student who embarks on a road trip with the gorgeous Valerie to deliver the ashes of the recently deceased Herma to her final resting place, against the wishes of Herma’s family. Lucca is forced to reconsider her plans for the future as she becomes inspired by Valerie’s open heart. With Verena Wustkamp. Available on DVD Jan. 6.

In HGTV’s Ellen’s Design Challenge (Jan. 26, 9 pm), the award-winning talk show host and comedian, Ellen Degeneres pits six new designers against each other for a shot at being the next top furniture designer. The catch? They’ve got 24 hours, a lead carpenter, tools, and a workshop to create a new build. A designer will be eliminated every episode until only one designer is left at the table.

Singer Meghan Trainor’s third studio album Title (Deluxe Edition) was inspired by the music of the 50s and 60s. This reprint deluxe version of her 2014 extended play features eleven tracks, including the smash hit “All About That Bass” and four bonus tracks. Shy Carter comes on board for “Mr. Almost.” Trainor’s fantastic, and songs like “Title” and “Lips Are Movin” serve to cement her as a pop-feminist goddess. Available on Jan 13.

NOT TO BE MISSED: In theaters now is Tim Burton’s Big Eyes, focusing on American artist Margaret Keane, whose work was fraudulently claimed in the 50s and 60s by her then-husband Walter. Starring Amy Adams and Christoph Waltz. SHE - 10 - 01/15

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thousands of women enjoyed olivia travel’s thanksgiving caribbean cruise, on board holland america’s ms westerdam, roundtrip from tampa, fl. photos by verónica espinal / view more photos at www.shemag.com

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in the news

All Clerks Must Issue Marriage Licenses to Same-Sex Couples on January 6, 2015

Costly Legal Battles Ahead for Any Clerk Who Continues to Discriminate At presstime, as of January 6, County Clerks across Florida have a legal obligation to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples – or risk expensive litigation, including liability for damages and attorney fees. In refusing to extend a stay that expires on Jan 5th, the US Supreme Court smacked down the last ditch effort by Attorney General Pam Bondi to block marriages. The highest court also put an end to the confusion generated by a memo to Clerks from the legal counsel to the Florida Association of Clerks and Comptrollers.

cluding 4 federal appellate courts -- who over the past year have affirmed the freedom to marry and held the denial of marriage and full respect to be unconstitutional. The 11th Circuit refused to delay the ruling’s going into effect, and now so has the United States Supreme Court. In the hours following the SCOTUS decision, law firms, private attorneys and legal organizations have committed to providing pro bono legal counsel to any Clerks who are concerned about the memo. Attorneys also issued a stern warning: Clerks who fail to heed the federal court ruling declaring the ban unconsti

frequently asked questions about marriage laws in florida Does Florida require blood tests prior to the issuance of a marriage license?

No. Are witnesses required to sign the marriage certificate?

Although the marriage certificate has spaces for two witnesses to sign, witnesses are not specifically required by law. Do both persons have to appear in the county clerk’s office to obtain the license?

Generally the answer is yes. If one of the persons to be married is not able to go to the clerk’s office because of illness or other reason, he or she should contact the clerk to see if special arrangements can be made. Does Florida recommend any premarital counseling prior to the issuance of a marriage license?

That memo by a Greenberg Traurig attorney has been blasted by state and national legal experts and includes an exaggerated warning to Clerks that they could be fined or prosecuted if they issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples. “Clerks can stand in the doorway and try to block equality or they can welcome gay couples who have waited for decades for this moment,” said Nadine Smith. “We expect every Clerk to uphold their oath and protect the constitutional rights of gay couples seeking marriage licenses. No legal firm’s memo overrides their clear legal obligation.” A Federal district court in Florida has now joined the 60 other state and federal courts -- in-

tutional will end up in a costly legal battle. Clerks were already preparing for marriage, adjusting forms and determining if they would open early. The Osceola County commission has already voted that the secondfloor courthouse office where passports and marriage licenses are issued will open at 12:01 am on January 6. In preparation for couples planning to wed on Jan 6th, Equality Florida has set up an online clearinghouse at www.eqfl.org/marriage to keep people informed about what you need to know to get a marriage license, along with legal updates and other valuable information.

Yes. Florida recommends, but does not require, the completion of a premarital preparation course of not less than 4 hours taught by a provider who has been approved by the Clerk of the Circuit Court. The course may be completed by personal instruction or by video/electronic instruction. Providers must furnish a certificate of completion at the conclusion of the course, which should be submitted to the Clerk’s Office when applying for a marriage license. For those couples who voluntarily complete this premarital preparation course, the state offers a reduced marriage license fee and no waiting period. NOTE: For additional information about the premarital preparation course and providers in your area, or the family law handbook, please contact the Clerk of the Circuit Court, Marriage Division, in your county or check out their webpages at dlis.dos.state.fl.us/fgils/coclerks.html Is there a waiting period for the issuance of the marriage license?

If both partners are Florida residents, there is a 3-day delay in the effective date of the marriage license if the couple does not participate in a premarital preparation course meeting the requirements

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specified in law and whose provider is registered with the Clerk of the Circuit Court. Exceptions to the delayed effective date must be granted for individuals asserting hardship who have been granted a waiver by a county court judge. If only one of the couples is a Florida resident and the Florida resident takes the course, there is no waiting period. There is no waiting period for couples from out of state. What forms of identification do I need?

Two (2) forms of identification may be required. One form of identification required is an valid photo identification issued by the federal or state government. The photo identification must have the correct legal name, date of birth and signature of the applicant. The following valid proofs of photo identifications are accepted:

• Driver’s License (U.S. State or Government) • Passport • U.S. Military identification • State Identification Card (U.S. State or Government) • Alien Registration Card All U.S. citizens and residents must provide their Social Security Number. Non-U.S. Citizens may provide one of the following valid Identifications: Alien Registration Card, US State issued Driver’s License, or Passport if they do not have a Social Security Number. For how long are marriage licenses valid.

Marriage licenses are for use within the State for sixty-60 days. They must be returned to the Clerk’s Office for recording within 10 days after the marriage is performed. What is the county/state fee for obtaining a marriage license?

The marriage license fee is $93.50. There is a reduction for all couples who complete the premarital preparation course, making the marriage license cost $61.00 for these couples. What if I have been married before?

If either applicant has been previously married, the exact date of the last divorce, death, or annulment must be provided. In some counties, proof of how the last marriage terminated must be present e.g., divorce decree or death certificate. *Source: Equality Florida, eqfl.org

TO DO WHERE TO GO WHAT

Art Walk on Wilton Drive now through April 18 • 7 - 10 PM 2176 Wilton Drive, Wilton Manors Optional $10 VIP Attendee Wrist bracelet artwalkonwiltondrive.com the lion king Jan 7 - Feb 1 • $34.75 - $149.75 Broward Center for the Performing Arts 201 SW 5 Ave, Fort Lauderdale browardcenter.org movie: RUTHIE & CONNIE

Jan 8 • 7PM • $15 • Gateway Theatre 1820 E Sunrise Blvd, Fort Lauderdale, FL tickets at stonewall-museum.org GLBT Coming Out Support Group Jan 14 • 7PM - 8PM 946 North Mills Ave, Orlando thecenterorlando.org lesbo go-go

Jan 17 • 10PM • No Cover • The Stox Bar 21 West Last Olas Blvd. Fort Lauderdale Riverwalk Stone Crab & Seafood Festival

Jan 17 • 11AM - 5PM Esplanade Park • 401 SW 2nd Street Fort Lauderdale • goriverwalk.com

Bishop Gene Robinson to Speak at the 50th Anniversary Ceremony at Independence Hall

suzanne westehoefer

Bishop Gene Robinson, the first openly gay Episcopal Bishop, will join the 50th Anniversary Ceremony on July 4th, commemorating the Gay Pioneers and celebrating 50 years of LGBT civil rights progress. The ceremony will focus on advances in five key areas including religion. The organized LGBT civil rights movement was launched when activists from New York, Washington D.C., and Philadelphia staged demonstrations for equality each Fourth of July from 1965 to 1969. When 40 activists picketed in front of Independence Hall in 1965, it was the largest demonstration for gay equality in world history. Organized by Frank Kameny and Barbara Gittings, these “Annual Reminders” laid the groundwork for the Stonewall riot. After Stonewall, Kameny and Gittings suspended the Annual Reminders and turned their energies to the 1970 march from Greenwich Village to Central Park marking the first anniversary of Stonewall. The 50th Anniversary Celebration of the LGBT civil rights movement will take place from July 2 to 5, 2015, in Philadelphia. More infomation can be found at www.lgbt50th.org • www.gaypioneers.com

lesbo go-go’s winter t-dance

Jan 23 • 8PM • Sunshine Cathedral 1480 SW 9 Ave., Fort Lauderdale sunshinecathedral.org Jan 25 • 3:30PM • $8 The Manor 2345 Wilton Drive • Wilton Manors, FL 4th Annual State of Our Community Networking Luncheon & EXPO - Miami Jan 27 • 11AM - 2PM

Jungle Island • 111 Parrot Jungle Trail Miami • RSVP at rsvp@gaybizmiami.com Lambda Annual Open House Dinner

Jan 30 – Feb 2 Compass • 201 N. Dixie Highway Lake Worth, FL • compassglcc.com creating change presents Michelle Balan live!

Feb 7 • 7PM Cinema Paradiso • 503 SE 6 Street Fort Lauderdale • visionofchange.us

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by heather smith

on the cover

In 2003, Jennifer Knapp had a successful career as a contemporary Christian singer-songwriter. She had sold over a million albums. She had a Grammy nomination and several Dove Awards. However, she was not enjoying her success the way one would expect. She was exhausted, going through what she described as a “crisis of confidence.” She walked away from music and virtually disappeared. Four years ago, Knapp returned with an announcement that would test the loyalty of her fans and provoke many conservative Christians. She was a lesbian. She released an album called Letting Go and began her comeback. In October 2014, Knapp released a new album called Set Me Free, as well as a memoir, titled Facing the Music: My Story. Both works are honest and emotional and continue to spread what initially gained her fame—her message of love and faith. Jennifer Knapp took some time to talk about why she left music, her journey back, and how her faith still plays a part in her career. In 2002, you walked away from a successful career as a contemporary Christian artist. What were the factors that made you leave it behind? Did your sexuality play a part in that?

In general, I left my Christian music career exhausted. I was going through such a crisis of personal confidence to such a point that I simply didn’t have it in me to continue wrestling my private needs while living such a public life. I had so many issues weighing me down: crisis of faith and questions about whether or not I even wanted to be a Christian “on display”. I had a host of philosophical doubts about my role in the industry and many questions about what, if any of my own faith experience I was willing to share in public. Looking back, I’d have to say that my sexuality had a part to play in it, sure, but it was more of a symptom of

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need rather than a catalyst. It was, however a huge wakeup call that I needed to start taking my mental and physical well-being a lot more seriously, and so, I did. In 2010, you came out and also released a new record Letting Go. What was the reaction of your fans after you came out?

I’ve experienced the entire, perhaps predictable spectrum. There were fans absolutely celebrating with me, the joy of returning to music after having come back from such a dark place, all the way to having CDs sent back and hate mail. There were Christians who went out of their way to be supportive, while others angrily insist I could never claim my Christianity again. Good or bad, though, my coming out has definitely been a significant factor for many of the fans I’ve lost and kept since coming back. What is your relationship with your earlier, more faith based records, Kansas, Lay It Down, and The Way I Am?

There are a handful of songs I still play live, but I’m pretty selective about when and where they get played. There are some personal, faith-based reasons why I won’t play some and there are some I just don’t enjoy playing. In the end, I suppose like any artist performing

their own stuff, you keep playing what speaks to you and leave out what doesn’t fit. In what ways has your music evolved since these earlier releases?

I’d like to think that, in general, that my overall skills have matured. I like more of what I write these days, lyrically, melodically, structurally— yet I don’t know that I’ve experienced a great sonic shift either. I think if there’s been any major evolution, it’s been one more of confidence and philosophy. I’m not a 20-year-old kid any more. I don’t feel that once nagging pressure to have to out-sing or out-write the last song in order to keep moving forward. What is the song you are most connected to on your new album?

It’s hard to pick really, because just about every song has a moment that is so deeply personal. Today, it might be “Neosho” and tomorrow “What Might Have Been.” It’s more likely that one or two over the course of time might slip out of use, but for now, any one of them could be my heart’s cry for the day. You have a book, Facing the Music: My Story, that just came out. What were your reasons for writing a memoir?

Mostly, I just wanted to take a moment to ask myself, “How did I get here?” Especially after coming out, it was a question asked of me

so many times, it seemed like the timing was right to sit down and reflect. From growing up in a small country town, to being a Christian pin-up girl, to coming out and questioning everything my faith community had ever taught me, I really wanted to go back and trace the path of what felt like was a fight for survival. Based on your history as a Contemporary Christian musician, I am sure people tell you that homosexuality is a sin. What is your response?

It’s not like I have a standard response, but the place I usually try to get to is one that moves away from any Biblical debate and moves toward the testimony of what it’s like to suffer under that teaching. So much has been said to defend one theological position or another, but what we’ve really missed out on the everyday people, families, LGBTs and their allies that have been caught in the crossfire. I think we need to move away from our tendencies to talk about our varying beliefs as Christians (of which there are many) but rather, get back to the business of defining our faith by how we love our neighbor. There’s really not much to debate now that the lines have been drawn, either you do or you don’t think LGBT love is a sin. The belief you hold doesn’t make you a Christian, it just let’s people know what kind of Christian you are. You have stuck to your faith. What are people’s reactions this this?

“...we need to move away from our tendencies

to talk about our varying beliefs as Christians (of which there are many) but rather, get back to the business of defining our faith by

how we love our neighbor.”

Whether the response is from people in the church, those who have left the church or don’t care about religion, the kinds of reactions I get almost always depend on the backstory of the person making their commentary about my experience. For some LGBTs who have spent their lives serving and worshiping in full view of the pulpit, it makes sense that they’d be happy that I call myself a Christian. On the other hand, I’ve heard plenty from those who have been hurt, discriminated against or cast out, who question why I would stay. There will always be people who insist they know the best path for you or that they know what you need. It’s not that that can’t be an act of true enthusiasm and love, but in the end, each of us have to be responsible and honor our own conscience and experience. It’s in that way that claiming my faith and being honest that I’ve kept it has been very similar to coming out as a lesbian. Not everyone gets it. I don’t always have the words that will convince anyone

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that I’m legit, but there’s what I know and what I’ve got. It’s all any of us have, our experience. Our story. The real challenge is giving each other a wide enough path to travel it and for each of us to learn how to move ahead without destroying everything in our path. Does your faith still play a large role in your music?

It has a role to play in my life personally, so I suppose there’s a trickle down into my music in some ways. I hope that what shows up in my music is a reflection of what’s going on in my life, yet, just like when you meet me on the street, or we sit down to have a coffee, I would rather the impact of faith in my life actually shows up more in my actions— to the benefit and joy of my neighbor—rather than it be a message of words. Compassion, love, forgiveness, a sense of something deeper than what I can see—I’d like to think are some of the themes that are woven through all my expressions in some way, but it would be a mistake to confuse that with any interest in writing music for the sake of promoting religion. If you could take back one lyric from a song you wrote, what would it be?

Really, there’s only one song that concerns me and that’s “The Way I Am.” The lyrics in the chorus being: “It’s better off this way to be deaf, dumb and lame than to be the way I am/it’s better off this way to be groping for the flame than to be the way I am”. They are my words but a take on the Bible when Jesus said, “If your eye causes you to stumble pluck it out.”

A lot of LGBT folks living in the church world have used that song almost like a talisman of religious shame. It’s too easily confused for a song that encourages reparative therapy or self harm. That’s exactly what I was trying to point out to the church, that not every metaphor in the Bible was meant to be literal, and in doing so, it causes more harm than good. Yet in trying to make my point, some couldn’t avoid the shaming tactics I was meaning to criticize in the first place. I want the songs that I write to inspire confidence, a sense of self-worth and hope…this song failed that for way too many, I think. Who are your influences?

Well, I hope in all of the years I’ve been amazed and listening their powers have rubbed off…the likes of Tracy Chapman, Natalie Merchant, Cowboy Junkies, Patty Griffin, Jonatha Brooke, Mary Chapin Carpenter, Amy Ray and Emily Saliers, U2, Dave Matthews and the list goes on. Their poetry is what inspires me most. They write music that echoes in your heart for a lifetime. They never seem to write music just for the sake of selling records or themselves. There are no B sides; they are always cutting to the marrow. What else is in store for the rest of 2014 and into 2015?

The balance of 2014 is skipping around in support of Set Me Free and Facing the Music. One day I’m singing, next I’m doing book readings, then after that speaking to the LGBT faith conversation. This fall I’m doing a little bit of everything. The plan getting into Spring 2015 is putting a nice tour together in support of the album.

For more information about Jennifer Knapp, visit her website, www.jenniferknapp.com. Heather Smith is the creator and producer of Rubyfruit Radio, a podcast featuring the best in female artists. Special thanks to Lesbian.com for sharing this interview with us.

“I hope that what shows up in my music is a reflection of what’s going on in my life...” SHE - 18 - 01/15

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feature es. Whatever is going on in Suzanne’s life, you’ll get an earful of it. She doesn’t tell jokes. She tells the truth. Or the truth as filtered through her uniquely twisted life experience. Suzanne’s extraordinary candor made a life in the closet impossible. The minute she knew she was a lesbian, everyone else knew, too. Luckily, someone put a microphone in her hand so we could laugh along with her. Her openness blazed a trail of firsts: First openly lesbian comedian with an HBO special; First openly lesbian comedian on Late Night with David Letterman. Every show Suzanne does is original, as her candor problem leaves no room for scripting. For the most part, the same can be said for every conversation with Suzanne, as we found out once again during this quick (and candid) interview. Happy New Year! How would you sum up this past year for yourself?

[Laughs] What a year! I tore my hamstring off my ass and I smacked my head a few months ago, landed in the hospital. I feel that while I didn’t actually play in the NFL, I lived like one of the players. You’ve got such a knack for finding the humor in the most unlikely situations, what’s the secret of knowing how far to go or when to stop?

The audience tells me how far to go always. Not out loud. I actually hate that, but with their eyes. And laughs. And by paying attention. We’ve been lucky enough to see you do some really fun and great work in web series (We Have To Stop Now) do you have more plans to act?

Yes, I have plans to act. I would love another web series actually. I’m going to ask for one for Christmas. Yes. That’s a great idea. Your relationships have always played a huge part in your act, are there times when your partner has to say, “Please don’t mention this in your act, Suzanne?” Or is it pretty much a given that it’s going in?

Saying to me, “Please don’t mention this in your act,” pretty much guarantees it’s going to end up as my big closer. Loving me means having no secrets.

Checking in with

suzanne westenhoefer Suzanne Westenhoefer in a word: Candid. She’s refreshingly candid, disturbingly candid and oh-my-god-she-just-said-that candid. Happily, she’s funny, too. For over two decades, this bold and brazen out lesbian comedian has been traveling the world, sharing her heart and soul with audienc-

You do a lot of cruise ship comedy, which is so different than in a night club, where you can just leave afterward. On a ship, you’re with your audiences all week. Is that harder, as a performer?

I actually love working on a cruise and being with everyone all week. Especially if I do a show at the end of the week, I can talk about all the stuff that happened to us on the ship or in ports. Basically, I can make your vacation my work. [Snickers evilly.] Finally, You get to travel a lot in your line of work, but we know you’re a true West Coast girl—so what’s the best part of getting back to Cali?

The best part of Cali? Calling my mom back in Pennsylvania, as I sip wine on the porch in shorts, while she bitches about frozen ice on her car.

suzanne will be performing live in fort lauderdale at sunshine cathedral on january 23rd, 8pm. purchase your tickets at www.sunshinecathedral.org

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by evan wolfson

feature

in the way of pro-marriage court rulings in their states. And 12 judges appointed by Republican presidents came down on the right side of history, ruling in support of the freedom to marry. 2) Pro-Marriage Court Victories Cascade Across Country

top 5 moments from a blockbuster year for the freedom to marry 2014 was another blockbuster year for the freedom to marry. In January gay couples could marry in 19 states. By December that number had skyrocketed to 35 — covering two-thirds of the American people. The conversation about the freedom to marry and gay people is now underway in every corner of the country.

5) Global Number Hits 10%

In 2014, a new benchmark was reached: 10% of the world’s population now live in countries where gay couples share in the freedom to marry — up from zero a little more than a decade ago. The freedom to marry has come to 19 countries on 5 continents — including Argentina, Belgium, Brazil, Canada, Denmark, the United Kingdom, France, Iceland, Luxembourg, The Netherlands, New Zealand, Norway, Portugal, South Africa, Spain, Sweden, Uruguay, and much of Mexico and the United States — and the world continues to spin on its axis. 4) Public Support for the Freedom to Marry Hits Record High

For the first time in U.S. history, a near-supermajority (59%) of Americans support marriage for same-sex couples, with only 34% opposed, according to a Washington Post/ABC News poll. Polling this year also shows 50% or more support in every region of the country, including the South, Midwest, and West. Even in states as diverse as Florida, Alaska, and Wyoming, polls indicate that citizens across all of America are ready for the freedom to marry. On both sides of the aisle, politicians are either staying silent or outright supporting marriage for gay couples. 3) Republican Party Continues to Evolve

More and more Republicans — like former Senator Alan Simpson and Rep. David Jolly (R-FL)– stood up for conservative values of freedom and family by voicing support for the freedom to marry. Majorities of Republicans under age 45 and of young evangelicals are for the freedom to marry., Republican governors — Susana Martinez of New Mexico, Brian Sandoval of Nevada, Scott Walker of Wisconsin, Chris Christie of New Jersey, and Tom Corbett of Pennsylvania — all decided not to stand

In December 2013, a federal judge stuck down Utah’s marriage ban, setting the stage for 1,300 same-sex couples to marry in the following weeks. Since then, over 50 state and federal courts, most recently in South Carolina and Mississippi, have ruled for the freedom to marry. Four federal appellate courts — the 10th, 4th, 7th, and 9th Circuit Courts of Appeals — ruled in favor, with only one — the 6th Circuit — going the other way. The legal consensus is clear: marriage discrimination is indefensible and unconstitutional. And 32 state attorneys general and a chorus of voices, including even opponents of the freedom to marry, have said to the Supreme Court: it’s time to rule nationwide.

#1

1) Supreme Court Green-Lights the Freedom to Marry in Almost a Dozen States

In October, the Supreme Court flashed a bright green light for the freedom to marry in 11 more states. The Supreme Court effectively grew the number of freedom to marry states from 19 to 30 overnight. And with another win the very next day, in the 9th Circuit, we ended the year with two-thirds (!) of the American people living in 35 freedom to marry states. The Freedom to Marry strategy was, and remains, to build a critical mass of states and critical mass of public support to create the climate for the Supreme Court to bring the country to resolution nationwide. As 2014 closed with 15 states still discriminating, couples are back before the Court urging the justices to finish the job. It’s not a done deal until it’s done — but what we’ve been doing is working. In 2015, we will keep doing the work until amid a sea of “I do’s” throughout the entire country, Freedom to Marry and all who support this campaign can say, “It’s done.” Freedom to Marry is the campaign to win marriage nationwide. More at freedomtomarry.org

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feature

Q &A

A QUICKIE

you’re right. I am a New Yorker! Here is what I miss. My girlfriend Lynda, all my clothes and shoes and of course having everything nearby. Just last week, we walked to Times Square and went to see a Broadway show. Living here, you can be that spontaneous— with a credit card. Women in comedy are a force to be reckoned with and yet there are still critics out there (and jerks like Adam Corolla) who say women aren’t funny. What is that all about?

with

Michelle Balan

These idiots have been saying women aren’t funny since Lucille Ball, Phyllis Diller and Carol Burnett. While these women took the world by storm, people still thought women weren’t funny. Then Rosie, Ellen and Roseanne came along and had their own shows, making millions. Still, women weren’t funny. I am not sure if that sentiment will ever end. I can tell you that this industry is not only hard for women, but even harder for women over 30. I am grateful that I have a steady career. Do your friends and family have to preface conversations with “...and don’t use this in your act,” or do they just know they’re fair game?

Not my friends so much, as they know they can always end up in my act. I hear it all the time from audience members. Or then I get, “Come sit with me and my family so you can get more material.” That’s when I leave the buffet.
 Doing comedy on a ship is different than in a club, where you can just leave afterwards. On a ship, you have to basically hang out with your audiences all week. Is that harder for you, as a performer?

You are so right. I see you’ve cruised. It is living with your audience for a week. It’s great when they love you, but it can be very exhausting talking to everyone and smiling. If they hate you, they don’t talk to you, but they’ll stare at you while you’re eating. I’ve known comics to stay in their cabins the entire time and order in. What do people ask you the most when they meet you?

How did you get started in comedy? Who is your inspiration or favorite comedian? Do you have kids? (I don’t know what that has to do with anything.) Michele Balan is a classy comedian with attitude. Sometimes class has to move over for the attitude. She’s appeared on Last Comic Standing, The Joy Behar Show, Byron Allen’s Comics Unleashed, the OUTlaugh Festival on LOGO and headlines all over the country at comedy clubs, cruises, and more! We caught up with Michele just as she prepared to ship out on her latest cruise gig. Lately, you’re the cruise ship queen, floating to all these luxury destinations, yet we all know you’re a hardcore New Yorker. What’s the best part of returning to the Big Apple?

Yes, I am cruising more than a gay man in the meat rack in Fire Island! It’s been great that I get to see the world while doing comedy, but yes,

You’ve worked among some of the brightest LGBT comics out there, so who makes YOU laugh?

Yes, I have worked with them all. They all make me laugh! I love Julie Goldman, Karen Williams and Vickie Shaw. Even I make me laugh. What kinds of things do you have planned for 2015?

I can barely plan next week. Well, I will be on a Celebrity cruise. Although I love working the cruises, I hope to stay home a little bit more and do some work in my apartment like painting, maybe a little redecorating. My New Year’s resolution is to get rid of clothing I have not worn in five years and drop them all off at the thrift store. That too is around the corner in NYC! don’t miss michelle balan’s upcoming concert, hilarity for charity, on february 7th at cinema paradiso in fort lauderdale. tickets at visionofchange.us

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2014 SHE GIRLS

see more at www.shemag.com

we love them all! • Monica, February, Miami • Yakira, March, Naples • Mayven, April, St. Petersburg • Melissa, May, St. Petersburg • Mary, June, Savannah • Robyn, July, London • Luisa, August, Tampa • Keisa, September, Midtown Miami • Yorelis, October, Tampa • Jessica, November, St. Petersburg • Morgan, December, Miami Beach

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noticias El New York Times destaca avance de derechos LGBT en Cuba El diario The New York Times (NYT) destacó a finales de Diciembre la evolución de los derechos de los homosexuales en Cuba durante los últimos años y mostró la confianza en que el acercamiento entre la isla y EEUU permita seguir avanzando. El periódico, que en los últimos meses ha dedicado gran atención a Cuba, sostiene en un editorial publicado en inglés y español que la “visible y fortalecida comunidad gay ofrece esperanzas de que otras libertades se asentarán” en el país. El NYT relata la mejora de la situación de la comunidad homosexual gracias a los movimientos ciudadanos y el liderazgo de Mariela Castro. “Algunos diplomáticos en La Habana ven el progreso que se ha hecho en el ámbito gay como un potencial modelo para expandir otro tipo de derechos civiles, en una de las sociedades más reprimidas del mundo”, señala el periódico. Según el NYT, las malas relaciones entre EEUU y Cuba han impedido a Washington apoyar activamente a los homosexuales, como ha hecho en otros países, dado que la mayoría de los activistas cubanos se oponen a colaborar con el Gobierno estadounidense por su política enfocada a derribar el régimen. “Esta actitud, compartida por muchos, ha frustrado esfuerzos por parte de Estados Unidos para promover la libertad de prensa y el derecho de asamblea. El giro en la política estadounidense va a lograr que más cubanos estén dispuestos a cooperar con Estados Unidos”, subraya el periódico.

actor Federico Díaz luchará contra la discriminación a los gays El actor Uruguayo radicado en México, Federico Díaz, se siente más conforme con quién es y no se reprime como persona ni como artista. El actor asegura que desde que se declaró abiertamente homosexual siente que se ha vuelto un mejor ser humano. “El 2014 fue un año de muchos cambios, haber contado quién soy me ha generado mucha honestidad, primero conmigo, después con mi familia y la gente que sigue mi trabajo. Creo que en este siglo nos debemos de dejar de asustar de tantas tonterías. ” “Yo quería empezar una nueva etapa de vida llena de muchos proyectos y, sobre todo, conforme con lo que soy. Dios sabe por qué nos manda de una manera o de otra en esta vida, de un color de piel, con un corazón y un sentimiento y hasta una manera de pensar diferente”, declaró.

Brasil tuvo 3.701 matrimonios gays en 2013 El 52,0 % de las bodas homosexuales fueron realizadas entre mujeres y el 48,0 % entre hombres. Brasil celebró 3.701 bodas homosexuales en 2013, el primer año en el que los casamientos entre las personas del mismo sexo fueron autorizados por una decisión judicial, según informaron en Diciembre pasado fuentes oficiales. El 52,0 % de las bodas homosexuales fueron realizadas entre mujeres y el 48,0 % entre hombres, según datos del registro civil publicados por el Instituto Brasileño de Geografía y Estadísticas (IBGE). Los casamientos entre personas del mismo sexo fueron considerados legales en Brasil en mayo de 2013 en una decisión del Consejo

Nacional de Justicia (CNJ), aunque los activistas homosexuales demandan que sus derechos sean consagrados en una ley. Anteriormente las parejas del mismo sexo sólo podían anotarse como “unión estable”, que en términos de derechos fueron equiparados a un casamiento en mayo de 2011 en una decisión del Tribunal Supremo, que se pronunció debido a la falta de legislación al respecto. En esos dos años, hasta la aprobación del derecho del casamiento homosexual, fueron registradas 1.277 uniones estables de parejas del mismo sexo, según datos oficiales. El IBGE también informó que el número total de casamientos aumentó un 1,1 % en el país en 2013, en relación al año anterior, y se situó en 1,1 millones, mientras que se concedieron 324.921 divorcios, con una disminución del 4,9 %.

“Dios sabe por qué nos manda de una manera o de otra en esta vida, de un color de piel, con un corazón y un sentimiento y hasta una manera de pensar diferente” Esa sensación lo ha llevado a plantearse una nueva meta en su vida. “Quiero apoyar a la comunidad gay para que sea vista por la sociedad de manera normal, creo que tenemos que empezar a fijarnos en nosotros y no en los demás.” “Y no debemos juzgar a un corazón, a un ser humano, a una energía que es una persona por su orientación sexual, religiosa o política”, agregó el actor.

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soy mujer

por veronica espinal

Después de pasar gran parte de mi infancia asistiendo a un colegio católico como es la costumbre en nuestros países, la educación religiosa era esencial. Dentro de la educación y las lecturas Bíblicas, la presencia de los Ángeles en algún pasaje Bíblico no se hacia esperar. Sin embargo, la devoción a Ellos nunca fue algo que se me inculcó, o al menos que logre recordar. Sí, se me enseño a rezarle al ángel de la guarda antes de acostarme y se me enseño que todos tenemos un angelito que siempre nos cuida. Ahora mientras escribo, todavía recuerdo la oración: “Ángel de la Guarda, dulce compañía, no me desampares ni de noche ni de día, no me dejes sola que me perdería”. Claro, después de hacer una búsqueda en Internet de la oración del ángel de la guarda, me doy cuenta que existen varias versiones de la misma oración, lo que sólo cambia son las ultimas palabras. ¡Hay las cosas que aprendemos cada día! Hace años me empezó la curiosidad por leer libros de metafísica, libros que aún conservo pero no he vuelto a leer. Dentro de la metafísica se enseña la conexión con tu ángel por medio de la meditación, por medio de cartas y otras formas. Sinceramente puedo contar que durante esos años en que leí los libros y ejercitaba esa conexión con mi ángel, me sentía diferente, o quizás debería decir, sentía a flor de piel la presencia de mi ángel. Recuerdo que se llamaba, o se llama Música. Aun no sé si es hombre o mujer, tampoco se como luce, tan sólo lo llegué a sentir años atrás.

Con toda fe sé que sigue conmigo, incluso sospecho su presencia por medio de voces internas a las que conscientemente muchas veces ignoro, y por más que me repito que no debo hacerlo, siempre vuelvo a tropezar con la misma piedra.

En días pasados, una persona conocida me mostró una cajita que contenía tarjetas ilustradas con mensajes de Ángeles. De inmediato fui a la librería y compré esa misma caja, o similar, con tarjetas y un libro que tiene mensajes angelicales para leer a diario o cuando anímicamente los necesite. Como todo, trae un pequeño libro para mostrarte cómo leer los mensajes y las diferentes partes de vida a las que aplicarlas. Cuando abrí la cajita y me di cuenta que tenía que leer el libro primero, decidí leerlo horas más tarde, horas que se convirtieron en días. Hoy me encuentro con la cajita en mi escritorio y necesitada de inspiración y tranquilidad mental. Por eso, decidí sacar una tarjeta al azar para leer mi mensaje. Saqué una tarjeta en la que me decía que mi ángel siempre está a mi lado. Aparentemente yo esperaba algo más concreto, algo más emocionante. Entonces decidí sacar otra tarjeta, la que me decía prácticamente lo mismo: Que mi ángel siempre está conmigo vigilando mi bienestar y mi alegría. Me di cuenta entonces que ese es mi mensaje, la certeza de que siempre está conmigo, seguramente esperando que de nuevo toque a su puerta y vuelva a abrir mi alma a él, o ella.

...mi ángel siempre está conmigo vigilando mi bienestar y mi alegría.”

Hoy te invito a que hagas lo mismo. Ve a la sección espiritual de alguna librería y compra una cajita con mensajes angelicales. Atrévete a descubrir la paz espiritual y la presencia de tu ángel. Siéntate y escríbele una carta como si escribieras a tu mejor amigo o amiga.

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with marissa cohen

on the shelves

1st Annual She King in Ft. Lauderdale • April 2002

Departure From the Script by Jae Jae is one of those authors who can effortlessly jump from historical fiction, such as her Backwards to Oregon series, to the paranormal with her Second Nature series, to contemporary rom-coms, such as Departure From the Script. Actress Amanda Clark never expects to fall for the very butch photographer Michelle. Of course, since this is a light and clever romance, they fall in love, thanks to the help of Michelle’s famous grandma. Jae does it again.

Claire’s Song: The Storyteller and the Healer, Book 2 by Sunny Alexander Alexander’s sequel to Flowers from Iraq follows Kathleen’s free spirited soul mate, Claire as she and Kathleen try to mend their relationship, with one catch. Claire wants to get pregnant. However, Kathleen refuses to start a family until she can locate her own lost siblings. Lost and afraid the two enter a contest to meet with a world-renowned couple’s therapist. This emotional sequel packs a punch.

Charity by Paulette Callen Reprinted by Ylva Publishing for the first time since 1997’s Simon and Schuster edition, Charity follows the close knit friendship between Lena, a sodbuster’s daughter, and Gustie Roemer, an educated woman from back east who finds love and friendship with Jordis, an adopted granddaughter of a Sioux medicine women. Lyrical, engrossing and gorgeous, Charity deserves to be on a shelf next to Nevada Barr’s Bittersweet or the classic Patience and Sarah.

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she classifieds accommodations

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Reach The Women of the LGBT Community! Advertising in She: A Lot More Affordable Than You Think. Call Today 954-354-9751 SHE - 28 - 01/15

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she classifieds miscellaneous

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she searches SELL SOMETHING YOU LOVE Sales representatives wanted. Unlimited earning potential and some of the highest commissions in the industry! Sales experience, professionalism and a love for She a MUST! Dade, Broward, ORLANDO, TAMPA, JACKSONVILLE areas availiable. Send resumes to donna@shemag.com.

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with the village sage

scopes AQUARIUS JAN 21 - FEB 19 Your usual cool, calm, collected demeanor is being threatened by an internal challenge that you have been ignoring for quite some time. Take this opportunity to defuse the ticking time bomb within by addressing repressed feelings, especially if they make you uncomfortable. Don’t confuse your net worth with self worth, no matter how much, or how little you have. Write down your hopes and dreams and relax.

leo July 23 - aug 22 You have an ambitious agenda and are ready to explode with built up energy. Be sure that you are in control. You’ll need to be open to suggested changes in how you do things. The positive changes extend into every area of your life, as you focus on improved health through committed diet and exercise programs, as well as on improved communication.

pisces feb 20 - mar 20 Your finances have been your focus for the past few years and the planets are urging you not to measure your self-worth against your net worth. The shifting planets have opened a doorway to reconnecting with what is really important to you. Celebrate the easing of career challenges by enjoying friends and family. When not engaged doing something, network as much as possible.

virgo aug 23 - sept 23 You have the opportunity to relax a little and to enjoy the rewards of all the hard work you’ve done. You’vr gained more self-awareness and emotional maturity through the challenges the Universe has provided for your growth. Your loved ones benefit from your unbridled shows of affection. Plan your pleasurable pursuits and get-togethers before the 21st., when your Ruler Mercury once again scrambles communication.

aries mar 21 - apr 20 You want to hit the floor running, eager to implement your new plan for success before the Retrograde propels you forward. However, working at full power doesn’t mean rushing, acting impulsively or unilaterally. Work within your existing structures and remember to discuss, not dictate. Expect conflicts between work and home needs. Make the necessary adjustments to maintain the proper balance.

libra sept 24 - oct 23 The Universe is giving you a rare opportunity to finally understand your deepest need for security on a soul level. Recent power struggles have caused a dangerous build-up of intense energy. Be careful to avoid making difficult situations worse. Be the diplomat, stop swimming upstream and relax with interesting company. Good times with loved ones will help reempower you.

taurus apr 21 - may 21 You start the new year with big plans to make a big dent in the already over-whelming ‘to-do’ list from last year. However, your energy level doesn’t match your action plan, so pace yourself. Don’t allow negative self-talk to cause anxiety. Stop the chatter by doing something fun. Whether working or playing, don’t overdo it. After the Retrograde, there will be miscommunication and misinformation, so avoid making decisions.

scorpio oct 24 - nov 22 You have the opportunity now to try something totally new and different. Turn down your legendary intensity to a sizzle, so that loved ones can enjoy a feeling of emotional security. Present challenges bring unpleasant memories, so make sure you have learned from past mistakes. Remember, the only thing you can control is your own reaction.

gemini may 22 - june 21 You will have to get serious about your financial situation and your budget now, as well as your projections for future cash-flow. It is just a little test to see how resourceful you are. Good times are still to be had. Appease your wanderlust by exploring your own neck of the woods and enjoy romantic-comedy- adventures with the significant others in your life.

sagittarius nov 23 - dec 21 You are laser beam focused on how to improve your finances. You would be well advised to leave your credit cards home and commit to staying within a realistic budget. No worries, you will still be able to have fun without having to go into debt. Unresolved issues or people from the past make a try at mutual resolution.

cancer June 22 - july 22 The Universe is strongly suggesting that you slow down as you have seriously depleted your reserves, of good health, good sense and good humor. You will also have to spend your much needed down-time considering your own needs first, especially at work. Make sure that you don’t create more stress by overspending. The budget is another thing that needs serious attention and balancing.

capricorn dec 22 - jan 20 You ride into the New Year on your high horse, armed with your ambitions. However, you’ll attract what you need with honey and not vinegar. Be prepared for projects to stall during the Retrograde. Try to not over-react by over-reaching on your credit cards or spinning in frustration.

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