Best of San Antonio 2014

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5,000 YEARS OF CIVILIZATION. LIVE ON STAGE!

WORLD’S TOP CLASSICAL CHINESE DANCERS ORIGINAL LIVE MUSIC BY SHEN YUN ORCHESTRA IMPASSIONED SONGS BY ACCLAIMED SINGERS STUNNING ANIMATED BACKDROPS

“Exquisitely Beautiful! Extraordinary experience!”

THE GLOBAL SENSATION RETURNS TO SAN ANTONIO WITH ALL-NEW SHOW

— Cate Blanchett, Academy Award-winning actress

“Very beautiful and moving! Very pleasing for all the senses!” — Joshua Bell, internationally renowned violinist

“Very genuine, very subtle, very romantic. Highly recommended!” — Blanca Guerra, famous Mexican actress

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four-time Grammy Award winner

E

MBARK ON an extraordinary journey across 5,000 years of Chinese civilization! From ancient dynasties to the modern day, witness inspiring stories and legends come alive on stage. Featuring classical Chinese dance, a full orchestra, exquisite costumes, and dazzling animated backdrops, Shen Yun will transport you to another world. Experience a performance that can truly touch your soul.

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Online: ShenYun.com/san-antonio TicketMaster.com Hotline: 800-380-8165

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sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 7


In true fiesta spirit, Mi Tierra Café and Bakery never closes, serving up art and culture along with its famous Tex-Mex dishes 24 hours a day.

La Margarita originated sizzling fajitas. Two patios offer a friendly spot for dining al fresco and people-watching.

Pico de Gallo’s vibrant atmosphere makes any meal a celebration. The restaurante is a favorite for its authentic home-style dishes.

Mariachi Bar is an exciting venue for live music, a festive place to celebrate the colorful tradition of Mariachi music at Mi Tierra in Market Square.

mitierracafe.com 210 225-1262

lamargarita.com 210 227-7140

picodegallo.com 210 225-6060

mariachibar.com 210 225-1262

We welcome all major credit cards.

8  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 9


VOTED best

m e at

market 2010, 2011 , 2012, 2013...

SIGNATURE MEATS USDA CHOICE FAJITAS & PINWHEELS

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2900 S. FLORES • 210.533.5112 • BOLNERSMEATMARKET.COM 10  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


5720 NW Interstate 410 Loop Frontage Rd. San Antonio , TX 78238 | 210-509-2913 | ancirakiasa.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 11


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DVDS, BLU-RAYS, GAMES, GAME HARDWARE, & CDS!

Publisher: Michael Wagner Editor in Chief: Callie Enlow (cenlow@sacurrent.com) Art Director: Eli Miller (emiller@sacurrent.com) Best of San Antonio Assistant Editor: Miriam Sitz Associate Editor: Bryan Rindfuss (brindfuss@sacurrent.com) Food & Nightlife Editor: Jessica Elizarraras (flavor@sacurrent.com) Music Editor: Matt Stieb (mstieb@sacurrent.com) Staff Writer: Mary Tuma (mtuma@sacurrent.com) Copy Editor: Miriam Sitz (msitz@sacurrent.com) Digital Content Editor: Joy-Marie Scott (jscott@sacurrent.com) Digital Developer: Jaime Monzon (jmonzon@sacurrent.com) Contributing Photographers: Rick Canfield, Casey Howell, Josh Huskin, Dan Payton Contributing Videographers: Rick Canfield, Chase Mullenax, Joe Turner Video Post-production: Bauhaus Media Group, Inc. Contributing Writers: Ron Bechtol, Jacob Burris, Ainsely Caffrey, James Courtney, Dustin Dooling, Thomas Jenkins, Lauren W. Madrid, Jeremy Martin, Janae Rice, Miriam Sitz, Manuel Solis, J.D. Swerzenski Editorial Interns: Ainsley Caffrey, Dustin Dooling, Katherine Sotelo, Janae Rice Design Interns: Orlando Cantu, Britney Fines

Advertising Director: Lara Fischer (x105) Sales Manager: Chelsea Bourque (x123) Marketing Manager: Cassandra Yardeni (x106) Senior Account Executives: Carlos Aguirre (x117), Johnny Deosdade (x114) Account Executives: Sarah Estrada (x120), Blanca Morales (x118) Production Manager: John Mata Graphic Designer: Tina Corbeil Production Interns: Gerald Edwards II, Andrew Lopez, Marie Solis Circulation Director: Justin Lopez (x121) Distribution: Juanita Alpizar, Oscar Alpizar, Sergio Alpizar, Chris Bubel, Pam Clepper, Joe Dominguez, Gabriella Gutierez, Terry McClelland, John Miller, Jose Trevino, Charles Tiller Business Manager: Elizabeth Hubbard Office Assistant: Kelsie Perez National Advertising: Voice Media Group 1-888-278-9866, voicemediagroup.com San Antonio Current 915 Dallas San Antonio, Texas 78215 Editorial: (210) 227-0044 / Fax: (210) 227-7755 Display Advertising: (210) 227-0044 Fax: (210) 227-7733 Classified: (210) 227-CLAS / Fax: (210) 227-7733 Get listed: Send us your complete info two weeks before publication. For complete submission guidelines, visit www.sacurrent.com. E-mail: sacalendar@sacurrent.com; Mail: Calendar Editor, same address as above; Fax: (210) 227-7755. Listing submissions are not accepted by phone.

9861 IH-10 West 3703 Broadway 6997 Bandera Rd 803 SW Military

5201 Walzem • 641-1600 13486 US 281 • 828-5525 5442 Evers • 509-3472 6900 San Pedro • 928-3472 8235 Agora Pkwy • 566-9200

• • • •

650-3472 545-3472 680-3472 826-2662

Copyright 2014, San Antonio Current Co., all rights reserved. San Antonio Current Co. is a wholly owned subsidiary of Euclid Media Group LLC. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission of the publisher is prohibited. Publisher does not assume any liability for unsolicited manuscripts, materials, or other content. Any submission include a stamped, self-addressed envelope. All editorial, advertising and business correspondence should be mailed to 915 Dallas St., San Antonio, TX 78215. Additional copies or back issues may be purchased at the Current offices for $1. Six-month domestic subscriptions may be purchased for $75; one-year subscriptions for $125.

This magazine is made with recycled materials and is 100% recyclable.

12  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

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)

Public Schools

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 13


TABLE OF CONTENTS Issue 14_17 / April 23-29, 2014

126

43

16 EDITOR’S NOTE

Changes in this year’s Best of San Antonio edition

BEST OF SAN ANTONIO 2014

Our annual guide of 145 reader-chosen favorites from around the city, plus 55 critics’ picks by Ron Bechtol, Jacob Burris, Ainsley Caffrey, Dustin Dooling, Sarah Fisch, Lauren Madrid, Janae Rice, Miriam Sitz, Manuel Solis and staff

21 FOOD

Whether you’re looking for a great date spot or the best tamales in town, our 44 mouthwatering winners have you covered

61 SHOPPING

Our favorite handmade goods meet the best boutiques in town with 35 super spots to spend your tax refund

85 PEOPLE 148

66

From San Antonio-famous faces to unsung heroes, these 35 citizens rep our city like no others

111 NIGHTLIFE

Need a good meat market? Old man bar? Karaoke spot? We’ve got you covered with 40 bars, clubs and saloons

145 AROUND TOWN

There’s some hidden gems on this list, like the little-known best sunset spot, and some bigger name establishments still killing it when it comes to 46 fun, quirky and puro San Anto places

163

168 CALENDAR

Our top picks for the week

183 ETC.

Savage Love, Free Will Astrology, Jonesin’ Crossword, This Modern World

ON THE COVER:

Sometimes the best ideas are the simplest. And sometimes the simplest ideas are the most complicated to execute. The path to piñata perfection was not easy, but it required creativity, resourcefulness and cooperation, aka all the things that make SA great. Piñatas by Johana De Leon. Photo by Josh Huskin. Cover by Eli Miller

14  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


new tuition rate

for Our Lady of the Lake University’s Adult Degree Completion Programs

$290 per credit hour

(Lowest price of any San Antonio Catholic university: Just $870 per class)

Undergraduate programs available:

lEArn MorE Attend our Information Session

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CAll: 210-431-3995

• Convenient schedule • First-rate faculty

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Enroll now

www.ollusa.edu/Finish • 210-431-3995

411 S.W. 24th Street • San antonio, tX 78207 • WWW.olluSa.edu sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 15


Hit It

Welcome to the new and (hopefully) improved Best of San Antonio 2014 I’ve always approached our Best of San Antonio issue with a mixture of excitement and dread. It’s exciting to see what readers choose as their favorite aspects of San Antonio, from shopping to nightlife to the people who make this city shine. But I’ve also often been underwhelmed by the responses. I used to joke that we should call this issue “Best Marketing Campaigns of San Antonio 2014.” I know, I know, that’s part of the deal, but in years past we’ve had to dutifully report on megachains like The Cheesecake Factory for best dessert (2010) or suspicious “winners” who quite obviously were better at gaming online polls than any of their purported “best” qualities (a winner that will not be named from 2013, for example). So, this year we wanted to shake it up a bit and see if we could get a more accurate reflection of the SA’s outstanding citizens and businesses. Firstly, we divided up the subcategories between readers’ picks (145 subcategories) and critics’ picks (55), to find out what our hardworking staff and contributors feel should be recognized for excellence. Critics’ picks are denoted by a star symbol (H) this year. Our critics mainly handled the zanier topics, like “best place to sleep in public” and “best place to indulge carnivorous cravings,” but also areas in which they had specific expertise that would go above and beyond the average San Antonian, like our longtime food critic’s opinion of the best wait staff in town and our music editor’s choice for the local bar with the best music selection. Readers still weighed in heavily on classics like “best burger” and “best tattoo shop,” but our new polling software made it much easier to prevent and eliminate cheating. We also implemented a rule that any winning business had to be headquartered in San Antonio and any winning individuals must live or work in Bexar County. We admit to breaking our own rules on two occasions: for the best bathroom to sneak into as a non-paying customer during Fiesta (we wouldn’t do you like that, San Antonio small business owners) and best local sports fan (to a Houston-based SA native bringing his Spurs love to the wider world). Now that the results are in, I think you’ll like them. This year there’s more joy in celebrating the weird, wacky, kooky and quirky, and 99 percent of the winners are current San Antonians. To me, that makes it the best Best of San Antonio yet, and I hope you agree. A final note, thank you to one of our favorite locals, Mr. Piñata, for participating in our marketing campaign and the augmented reality video on our cover. Also, huge thanks to Johana De Leon for handling our unusual custom piñata requests. See them in person at our Best of San Antonio pachanga on April 25! BEST, Callie Enlow 16  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


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18  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


TICKETS ON SALE NOW TICKETS AVAILABLE AT

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 19


EXPERIENCE

At Chama Gaucha, we have the same passion and desire to bring this churrasco experience to our guest. From our charcoal grills, guests will be transported to the homeland of the gauchos, Rio Grand Do Sul. A bountiful salad bar begins our guests’ dining experience, then they may decide to begin the main appeal of their churrascaria experience. From lamb, pork, chicken, to beef, each guest will be served to their hearts’ content.

SAN ANTONIO

18318 Sonterra Place San Antonio, TX 78258. Phone:210-564-9400.

HOUSTON

5865 Westheimer Rd Houston, TX 77057 Phone: 713-244-9500

www.chamagaucha.com 20  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

CHICAGO

3008 Finley Road Downers Grove, IL 60515 Phone: 630-324-6002


sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 21


FOOD

H = Critic’s pick

H Interior Mexican Restaurant Cascabel Mexican Patio 1000 S St. Mary’s, (210) 212-6456 Let’s face it folks, San Antonio has been so influenced by Tex-Mex that any cuisine beyond the Mexamerican border has never had a fighting chance—despite proclamations on restaurant signs all over town. In retaliation, it’s tempting to nominate the boys at Mixtli with their ethereal, seasonal evocations of regional Mexican food. But it seems right to first reward persistence and longevity, and that brings us to Cascabel. This unassuming spot in the center of Southtown has long been a lone voice trumpeting the likes of tortas de tinga, ensalada de nopales, huraches with cochinita pibil and that lusty/rusty goat stew called birria. It’s not that one can’t get a few of these and other offerings such as tlacoyos and posole (done here with goat) at a few other places around town, but rather that Cascabel does only this—no gravy-smothered enchiladas with yellow cheese, gracias very much.

H Place to Indulge Carnivorous Cravings TIE: The Big Bib

Steakhouse

104 Lanark, (210) 654-8400, thebigbib.com

1. Bohanan’s Prime Steaks and Seafood

602 Avenue A, (210) 228-0124, thegranarysa.com

219 E Houston, (210) 472-2600, bohanans.com Is it the swanky setting that makes Bohanan’s the best? The downtown backdrop? The excellent service? Or the succulent steaks, plethora of seafood, grilled vegetarian platters and rich sauces? Perhaps the classic cocktails? Whatever it is, Yahoo Travel seems to agree—the site named Bohanan’s one of 10 classic steakhouses to visit soon.

2. Myron’s Steakhouse 10003 NW Military Hwy, Ste 2101, (210) 493-3031, myronsprime.com

3. Little Red Barn 1836 S Hackberry, (210) 532-4235, littleredbarnsteakhouse.com 22  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

The Granary (pictured) After relocating from its original spot, Big Bib still garners impressive lines. There are several reasons why, but not all of them fit on your plate. Sure, the brisket is thick and flavorful, the turkey tender and moist, and the beef tips are out of this fucking world, but the attentive and friendly service is as sweet as that buttery peach cobbler. The sweet potato casserole really does taste like heaven, but the baked potato casserole is what dreams are made of. Brothers Alex and Tim Rattray are doing barbecue their way, by both honoring Texan ‘cue during lunchtime service and knocking smoked meats out of the park at dinner. Everything, from the buttermilk bread to the sweet and crunchy pickles, is made in-house with care—and it shows. Get there early for the best selection as The Granary is known to sell out while trying to keep Pearl visitors and locals fed.


FOOD

H Place to Eat Late Night Barbaro 2720 McCullough, (210) 320-2261, barbarosanantonio.com Eating late doesn’t always mean heading for the closest taco stand (we still love you, Hardbodies taco truck). Sometimes you want something more … refined. Enter Barbaro, which stays open to midnight Sunday through Thursday and until 1 a.m. on weekends. Sure, you can get an excellent pie on delicious dough with stellar topping combinations late into the evening, but don’t miss out on the small plates such as the charred asparagus with crème fraiche and a salsa rossa perfect for dipping any leftover crusts. If your sweet tooth strikes at the midnight hour, you could do much worse than ordering the ricotta zeppole, an order of deep-fried dough balls with butterscotch and sea salt. Now, that’s amore.

H Pan Dulce Horno Mission San Jose Bakery Multiple locations, simtrom.wix.com/hornomsjbakery With four locations across SA, Horno Mission San Jose makes it hard to resist its pan dulce varieties. Make your way through the menu of large buttery sugar cookies, giant croissants, molasses- and ginger-filled pig-shaped marranitos and flavorful empanadas replete with pumpkin, apple, pineapple or strawberry fillings. Grab a tray and stock up on pillowy mini conchas for the week (but we doubt they’ll last that long).

Burger 1. Chris Madrid’s 1900 Blanco, (210) 735-3552, chrismadrids.com A San Antonio favorite, Chris Madrid’s has been dishing out massive burgers with some serious fries since 1977. The famous tostada bean burger proves memorable, combining a juicy burger patty, beans and crisp chips with a whole lot of cheese. Madrid’s sweet mango margarita is a perfect pairing for any of the burgers, chalupas or nachos on the menu.

2. Chester’s Hamburger Company Multiple locations

3. Big’z Burger Joint 2303 N Loop 1604 W, (210) 408-2029, bigz-burgerjoint.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 23


r u o H y p p a H r o f s u Join

FOOD

Join our Energetic, Professional Bar Crowd at the Bar or on the Patio

JOIN US FOR 10 under $10Mon-Fri FOR11am-2pm LUNCH

Includes local favorites: chicken parmesan, meatball ravioli, penne primavera, linguine alla scampi, chicken alla arrabiatta and more.

TREAT YOURSELF TO SUNDAY BRUNCH 11am-3pm Featuring: salmon affumicatto, eggs benedict, filetto beneditto, eggs florentine, French toast & bacon, pasta carbonarra and Build Your Perfect Omelet.

1203 N W Loop 1604 at Blanco (210) 340-0000 Aldinos.com

“LikeUs”

San Antonio's BEST barbacoa WEEKDAY

BREAKFAST

SPECIAL WEEKDAY LUNCH

HUEVOS

RANCHEROS $2.49

ENCHILADA PLATE W/TEA $4.99

SPECIAL Tuesday - sunday 7 am - 2 pm

Closed Mondays

Bakery 1. Bakery Lorraine 511 E Grayson, (210) 862-5582, bakerylorraine.com

2. Bird Bakery 5912 Broadway, (210) 804-2473, birdbakery.com

3. Broadway Daily Bread Multiple locations, broadwaydailybread.net

Dessert 1. Bakery Lorraine 511 E Grayson, (210) 862-5582, bakerylorraine.com

2. Bird Bakery 5912 Broadway, (210) 804-2473, birdbakery.com

814 West Avenue San Antonio, TX 78201 210-236-8656 • alamobarbacoa.com 24  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

3. Cupcake Couture Multiple locations, cupcakecouturebakeries.com


Experience Pearl L O C A L F L AV O R SINCE 1883

es cowmhat’ se e

at

Home to ten world-class restaurants, twelve totally unique shops, the best coffee in Texas, cocktails for every season and reason, the weekly Pearl farmers market and the San Antonio Campus of the Culinary Institute of America. All on the banks of the Museum Reach of the San Antonio River.

sa · tx VISIT US ONLINE & IN PERSON

ATPEA R L.C O M

303 pearl pkwy # 300 san antonio · texas 78215

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 25


FOOD

H Place for a Large Group Rosario’s Mexican Café y Cantina Multiple locations, rosariossa.com For group dining, Rosario’s is hard to beat. The food is solid; the service, attentive; the menu, expansive enough to accommodate diverse tastes; and, perhaps most importantly, both restaurants are friggin’ huge. Large tables are easy to come by and, in our experience, servers don’t bat an eye at splitting a check multiple ways. Even those times that you do have to wait, the bar area is large enough to provide space for sitting or standing while you swill a cheap and tasty house marg on the rocks and down that addictive salsa—chips optional.

H Quick, Cheap Meal Florio’s Pizza 7701 Broadway, (210) 805-8646, floriospizza.com Look, Florio’s isn’t going to win awards for décor or customer service. It’s cramped and greasy, and the owners can be surly. But is it cheap, fast and good? Hell yes. For about $6, you can get two giant New York-style slices at lunch. Or go for dinner and order a whole pie for under $14. They have a handful of subs and calzones on the menu, too, but why order those when you can get a foldable slice of cheesy, spicy pepperoni? Lunches can get busy with kids from the nearby high school, but the pizza comes out fast. Stuff your face and revel in your own thriftiness.

CELEBRATE A

M O R E

R E L A X E D

F II E E S S T T A A F

O N

T H E

B A N K S

O F

THE RIVERWALK @ PEARL 26  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

SHOP LOCAL SHOP PEARL Home to ten worldclass restaurants, the best coffee & cocktails in San Antonio & twelve totally unique shops.

VISIT » ATPEARL.COM


511 E. Grayson St., San Antonio, Tx 78215

210.862.5582 www.BAKERYLORRAINE.com

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 27


Paella & Tapas Bar

Come Enjoy

Tues - Thurs: 4 pm - 10 pm Fri - Sat: 4pm - 11pm Sun: 10am - 3pm

Cocktails on

the Patio! Live Salsa Music & Dancing Fridays & Saturdays!

JOIN US FOR HAPPY HOURS:

Signature Cocktails: Mojitos, Caipirinhas & Pisco Sours – Just $3.50

$3.50 Draft Beers $5 House Wines! Tuesday-Friday • 4-7pm

Half Price Tapas During Happy Hour! Mon.-Fri.• 4-7PM

713 S. Alamo Street • 210.225.5550

TEXAS STYLE BURGERS. 1423 MCCULLOUGH AVE. | 210.226.7556 28  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

1420 South Alamo Suite 101

barracatx.com • (210) 445-2203


FOOD

Coffee 1. Local Coffee Multiple locations, localcoffeesa.com Serious about coffee, the neighborhood java brewmasters at Local treat bean roasting like an art. Self-admittedly “obsessed” with crafting the best cup of joe, baristas offer a rotating lineup of new coffee from different roasters around the country on a weekly basis. The sleek, modern space and relaxed ambience of all three locations, including the most recent (and much anticipated) spot at the Pearl, is perfect for catching up with friends or weeding through your inbox—this year Local was rightfully named “best place to work on your laptop,” too. Readers salute Local for keeping them not just caffeinated with damn good coffee, but with the direct-trade, organic kind of black gold we can all get behind.

2. Olmos Perk Coffee 5223 McCullough, (210) 858-2956, olmosperk.com

3. Halcyon Southtown 1414 S Alamo, (210) 277-7045, halcyonsouthtown.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 29


FOOD

BEST KOREAN RESTAURANT BY SA CURRENT READERS

KOREAN BBQ FOR OVER 5 YEARS! 366.4508 | 6905 BLANCO

Ice Cream 1. Brindles Awesome Ice Cream 11255 Huebner, #210, (210) 641-5222

2. Justin’s Ice Cream Company 245 E Commerce, Ste 150, (210) 222-2707

3. SA Pops 3420 N St. Mary’s, (210) 736-2526

Raspas or Paletas 1. Las Nieves Multiple locations, lasnievesfruitcups.com

0 $4La.r9ge Onzzea

16” ping Pi nly Top ryout O Car

30  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

“Try the tza” Mea s u io c li e D id S Approved Sid & Nancy

The lines at both locations, one on Hildebrand and the other on Blanco, are long for a reason. The perfectly illustrated menu is overwhelming, but you’ll have time to choose your super-fresh snack by the time you get to the counter. The “natural fruit shaved ice” or nieves come in seven flavors and six sizes to quench any thirst.

2. TIE: El Paraiso

Big Daddy’s Eats and Treats

Various locations, elparaisoicecream.com

228 E Cevallos, facebook.com/ bigdaddyseatstreats

3. TIE: Wizard’s

Snowcone Addiction

1044 Hot Wells

3402 S Zarzamora


FEAST

R E S T A U R A N T K I N G

W I L L I A M

SPECIALIZING IN

B O L D F L AV O R S STIFF DRINKS MODERN ATMOSPHERE COME FEEL THE ENERGY TUE-THU 5P-10P | FRI-SAT 5P-11P | SUNDAY BRUNCH 10:30A-2:30P

1024 S. ALAMO WWW.

210.354.1024

F E A S T S A . COM

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 31


FOOD

32  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


FOOD

Barbacoa

Puffy Taco

1. Taco Taco Café

1. Taco Taco Café

145 E Hildebrand, (210) 822-9533, tacotacosa.com

145 E Hildebrand, (210) 822-9533, tacotacosa.com

2. Tellez Tamales & Barbacoa

2. Henry’s Puffy Tacos

1737 S General McMullen, (210) 433-1367

Multiple locations, henryspuffytacos.com

3. Rio’s Barbacoa

3. Ray’s Drive Inn

Multiple locations

822 SW 19th, (210) 432-7171, raysdriveinn.net

Salsa

Mexican Restaurant (Cheap)

1. Taco Taco Café

1. Taco Taco Café

145 E Hildebrand, (210) 822-9533, tacotacosa.com

145 E Hildebrand, (210) 822-9533, tacotacosa.com

2. Rosario’s Mexican Café y Cantina

2. Taco Cabana

Multiple locations, rosariossa.com

Multiple locations, tacocabana.com

3. Paloma Blanca

3. Las Palapas

5800 Broadway, Ste 300, (210) 822-6151, palomablanca.net

Multiple locations, mylaspalapas.com

Breakfast Taco

Menudo

1. Taco Taco Café

1. Taco Taco Café

145 E Hildebrand, (210) 822-9533, tacotacosa.com

145 E Hildebrand, (210) 822-9533, tacotacosa.com

2. Taco Haven

2. Tellez Tamales & Barbacoa

Multiple locations, tacohaven.info

1737 S General McMullen, (210) 433-1367

3.Bill Miller Bar-B-Q

3. Mi Tierra Restaurant & Bakery

Multiple locations, billmillerbbq.com

218 Produce Row, (210) 225-1262, mitierracafe.com

Mexican Restaurant (Fancy) 1. Paloma Blanca 5800 Broadway, Ste 300, (210) 822-6151, palomablanca.net Paloma Blanca continues to be regarded as one of the best Mexican restaurants in the city, serving distinct but familiar dishes. For proof, just check out their gluten-free and paleo menus, which manage not to feel like dietary compromises in the least. Top shelf margaritas, flavorful ceviche and pancakes with Mexican caramel are just a few more reasons to visit for lunch, dinner or weekend brunch.

2. Rosario’s Mexican Café y Cantina Multiple locations, rosariossa.com

3. La Fonda on Main 2415 N Main Ave, (210) 733-0621, lafondaonmain.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 33


SERVING LUNCH & DINNER DAILY

GREAT SPECIALS!

HAPPY HOUR: MON-FRI 4-7P

2026 BABCOCK RD. SAN ANTONIO, TX 78229 | 210.615.7000

Beyond the Border Beyond Delicious

TACO SUNDAY SUNDAE

Beyond Authentic

Happy Hour Mon.-Fri.•4-7pm

Private Rooms Available

3810 Broadway San Antonio, TX 78209 210.822.3797 picantegrill.com 34  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

11255 Huebner Rd. • 210.641.5222


FOOD

Now in

20 lunch menu items UNDER $10 More than

Stone Oak Happy Hour 3PM – 7PM

19239 STONE OAK PKWY

Open Daily 11:00 am-10:00 pm CATERING & PRIVATE ROOM AVAILABLE • (210)495-3663 (FOOD)

WWW.MILANOITALIANGRILL.COM

View all the

Best of San Antonio Winners at sacurrent.com

Chinese Restaurant 1. Golden Wok Multiple locations, golden-wok.com

2. Hsiu Yu 8338 Broadway, (210) 828-2273, hsiuyu.com

3.Formosa Garden 1011 NE Loop 410, (210) 828-9988, formosagarden.com

Vietnamese Restaurant 1. VietNam Restaurant 3244 Broadway, (210) 822-7461

2. Pho Ha Long 6424 NW Loop 410, (210) 521-4507, phohalong.webs.com

3. Pho Cong Ly 300 W Bitters, (210) 499-5572

Middle Eastern Restaurant 1. Pasha Mediterranean Grill Multiple locations, gopasha.com

2. Jerusalem Grill 3259 Wurzbach, (210) 680-8400, jerusalemgrill.net

3. Turquoise Grill 3270 NW Loop 410, (210) 736-2887, turquoisegrill.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 35


n o B e L r Laisse r e l u o R Temps

LIVE CRAWFISH BOIL EVERY SATURDAY

HD SCREENS • LARGE SHADED DECK • OPEN DAILY FOR LUNCH & DINNER

12333 West Ave. (South of Nakoma) | 210.314.2339 | CrawdadsPourHouse.com | Follow Us On Facebook OPPORTUNITY KNOCKS IMMEDIATE OPENINGS!

Massage Therapist Mercato Café Attendant Mercato Café Supervisor Nail Technicians Pool Bartenders Pool Food & Beverage Server Public Area Attendant Room Attendant Room Service Server Server AM Server PM

If you are interested but unable to come in person, OR IF YOU JUST WANT TO EXPEDITE THE APPLICATION PROCESS, please visit our website at www.eilanhotel.com to apply online. Sage Hospitality proud to be an EEO/AA employer M/F/D/V. We maintain a drug-free workplace and perform pre-employment substance abuse testing and criminal background checks.

san antonio

MrPinataSA.com

Banquet Server (on-call) Banquet House Person Bartender Bell Person Cocktail Server Estheticians - Spa Host/Hostess Housekeeping House Person Housekeeping Supervisor Line Cook Maintenance Technician

Congratulations, Winners!

Sponsored BY PMS 186

PMS 872

BLACK PMS 186

17103 La Cantera Parkway, San Antonio, TX 78256 • (210) 598-2900 36  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

OF SAN ANTONIO

OFSANANTONIO

PMS 872

BLACK


FOOD

Restaurant to Take Tourists

Romantic Restaurant

1. Mi Tierra Restaurant & Bakery

1. Grey Moss Inn

218 Produce Row, (210) 225-1262, mitierracafe.com

19010 Scenic Loop (Helotes), (210) 695-8301, grey-moss-inn.com

2. Taco Taco Café

2. Bliss

145 E Hildebrand, (210) 822-9533, tacotacosa.com

926 S Presa, (210) 225-2547, foodisbliss.com

3. La Gloria

3. Biga on the Banks

100 E Grayson, (210) 267-9040, chefjohnnyhernandez.com/lagloria

203 S St. Mary’s, (210) 225-0722, biga.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 37


38  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


FOOD

elicious D Customers ARE THE BEST Thank you! Muchas Gracias! delicioustamales.com | 1-800-TAMALE-1

Seafood Restaurant 1. Sea Island Multiple locations, shrimphouse.com

2. Sand Bar Fish House & Market 200 E Grayson, Ste 117, (210) 212-2221, sandbarsa.com

3. Mariscos El Bucanero 16505 Blanco, (210) 408-9297, elbucanerosa.com

Indian Restaurant 1. India Palace 8474 Fredericksburg, (210) 692-5262, indiapalacesa.com

2. India Oven 1031 Patricia, Ste 106, (210) 366-1030, indiaoven.biz

3. Simi’s Indian Cuisine 4535 Fredericksburg, (210) 737-3166, simisindiacuisine.com

John the Greek’s restaurant serves food the way mom used to make it for over 25 years and will continue to evolve and expand. KAIL OREXI! (GOOD APPETITE) 210.403.0565 San Pedro @ Thousand Oaks www.johnthegreek.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 39


Bar Mosaico

HAPPY HOUR IS THE BEST HOUR! Join us Monday through Friday 3PM to 7PM and weekends 2PM to 5:30PM

www.lisasmexicancatering.com 210.433.2531

A TEXAS GASTROPUB

Fun Bar, Serious Food Premium Draft Brews Daily Happy Hour Sunday Brunch Large Covered Patio

210.497.7111 • 20626 Stone Oak Pkwy. • (Between Evans & 281) • KnifeForkGastropub.com 40  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


FOOD

Italian Restaurant 1. Il Sogno Osteria 200 E Grayson, (210) 223-3900

2. Paesanos Multiple locations, paesanos.com

3. Little Italy 824 Afterglow, (210) 349-2060, thelittleitalysanantonio.com

Barbecue

Foodie Greatness…with a stellar supporting cast is all part of a tailor made week of Tastes for Texans. San Antonio's Culinaria Festival Week delights with dozens of events to choose from and something for the serious foodie to the curious newbie. Visit our website at culinariasa.org, find us on Facebook/CulinariaSanAntonio, tweet us @culinariasa or send a carrier pigeon with a tiny note. Just don't miss this Texas made food extravaganza!

1. Rudy’s Country Store Multiple locations, rudysbbq.com

2. Two Bros BBQ 12656 West, (210) 496-0222, twobrosbbqmarket.com

3. The Granary 602 Avenue A, (210) 228-0124, thegranarysa.com

Tamales 1. Tellez Tamales & Barbacoa 1737 S General McMullen, (210) 433-1367

5/14-15 5/15 5/16 5/16 5/17 5/18

The Dinners Food Truck at H-E-B Alon Market Becker Luncheon at Becker Vineyards Best of Mexico at the Shops at La Cantera The Grand Tasting at the Henry B. Gonzalez Convention Center Bu Burgers, BBQ & Beer at the Pearl

*For the complete event schedule, to purchase tickets or for more infor mation, visit culinariasa.org or call (210) 822-9555.

2. Delicious Tamales Multiple locations, delicious-tamales.com

3. Ruben’s Homemade Tamales 1807 Rigsby, (210) 337-0025 sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 41


Think Of Citrus As A Great Restaurant With A Fine Hotel Attached. No offense to typical hotel restaurants, but Citrus is no typical hotel restaurant. Our daily menu is equal parts inspiring, tantalizing and deliciously innovative. We search San Antonio’s local markets and provisioners for the freshest and finest ingredients. All so that you may enjoy a meal worth talking about and worth coming back for. Who knows, you might even choose to stay the night so you can dine here again sooner.

15 0 E A S T H O U S TO N S T R E E T, S A N A N TO N I O, T X

|

2 1 0 . 2 2 7. 9 7 0 0

|

W W W. H OT E LVA L E N CI A - R I V E R WA L K .CO M

Citrus Restaurant of fers a fresh t wist on dining inside Hotel Valencia on San Antonio’s famed River Walk .

Think Of Citrus As A Great Restaurant With A Fine Hotel Attached.

E xecutive Chef, Jef fer y Balfour

No offense to typical hotel restaurants, but Citrus is no typical hotel restaurant. Our daily menu is equal parts inspiring, tantalizing and deliciously innovative. We search San Antonio’s local markets and provisioners for the freshest and finest ingredients. All so that you may enjoy a meal worth talking about and worth coming back for. Who knows, you might even choose to stay the night so you can dine here again, sooner. 150 EAST HOUSTON STREET, SAN ANTONIO, TX | 210. 227.9700 | HOTELVALENCIA-RIVERWALK.COM

Gusatv’s Garten ©2010 Hotel Valencia Corporation. Valencia® is a registered trademark of Newhall Land & Farming Company and is licensed to Hotel Valencia Corporation. The Valencia logo is a registered service mark of Eland Investment Corporation.

Valencia CitrusFF.indd 1

Follow Us On Facebook For Seasonal Hours and Upcoming Events Facebook.com/GustavsGarden • (@Magnolia Pancake Haus) 10333 Huebner Rd. • SA, TX 78240 • 210.496.0828 42  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

7/20/10 4:17:38 PM


FOOD

H New Restaurant Cured 306 Pearl Pkwy, (210) 314-3929, curedatpearl.com If the Pearl is the current culinary zenith of San Antonio, then Cured is its nucleus. What’s not to love about the stylish, modern details that honor and enhance the 109-year-old former Pearl Brewery administration building? Chef Steve McHugh, wife Sylvia and their dedicated staff, both front and back of the house, take pleasure in making every dining experience at Cured a great one, whether it’s brunch, lunch (get the burger!) or dinner. The charcuterie boards of in-house aged meats and pickled veggies are a must, but leave room for the pork cheek poutine (pictured), pan-seared quail breast or really, just about everything else.

RUNNER-UP: Kimura 152 E Pecan, Ste 102, (210) 444-0702, kimurasa.com We’d explain but we’re too busy slurpin’ our ramen.

H Place for a Date Cured 306 Pearl Pkwy, (210) 314-3929, curedatpearl.com Meat is sexy. No, not THAT type of meat. I’m talking ribs, charcuterie, sausage, tender cuts of beef. We’re talking all kinds of meat, not just steaks. And Cured is where we go for a sexy, meaty time. The location is gorgeous—exposed brick and soft white lighting. Lovers can start with a drink at the bar and then dine sideby-side at the chef’s table overlooking the kitchen. Even the food is made for pairs, for instance, the cabrito sliders come two to an order, nestled lovingly in a cast iron dish. No need to freshen yourself at home either—the bathrooms at Cured have perfume, hairspray and cologne. So meat up and get to boot knockin’. sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 43


ThankYou,

SanAntonio!

23651 IH 10 West • fralos.com

(210) 698-6616

Breakfast Is An Experience, At Our Haus. MAGNOLIA PANCAKE HAUS 10333 Huebner Road • 496-0828 606 Embassy Oaks Suite 100 • 496-0828 MAGNOLIAPANCAKEHAUS.COM 44  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


open early, at lunch and all day for exceptional coffee, nibbles, sandwiches & sweet treats.

e

e

.freshest. .finest. .from scratch.

e e 210.804.bird

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 45


SERVING SAN ANTONIO FOR 45 YEARS! 1969-2014 facebook.com/elmilagrito

521 E. WOODLAWN AT ST. MARY’S 210.737.8646

STAURANT - ITALIAN RE 66 nio Since 19

Anto Serving San

y, & f m o C , y z o C

n Purely Italia

8032 FREDERICKSBURG @ MEDICAL • 210.692.9900 • LORENZOS.INFO 46  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


FOOD

Chicago Bagel& Deli

If your bagel is not boiled, its just a roll with a hole. Come in and taste the difference.

l ur loca o y t r o Supp ablished t s e t s e long gel shop a b d e n amily ow

.

io n o t n A in San

f

Now accepting new wholesale accounts, please inquire for more information.

10918 Wurzbach ste 132 San Antonio, Tx 78230 210.691.2245 Don t forget to like us on

We Use o Non -gm flour

H Juice Shop URTH Juice Bar 5317 McCullough, (210) 272-0467, urthjuicebar.com URTH Juice Bar packs pounds of fresh produce into each 16-ounce beverage. Smoothies are blended to order with soy, almond, coconut or whole milk and offer an even more filling meal replacement with around 250 calories per serving, versus the juices’ 180- to 200-calories. Drinks such as the customer favorite Grassy Knoll, a green juice with kale, ginger, spinach, apple, cucumber and parsley, or the Bada-Bing smoothie with banana, yogurt, flax oil, honey and blueberries, run between $7 and $8, with specials on multi-day cleanses. URTH is open every day, from 7 a.m. to 7 p.m. on weekdays, 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. on Saturday and noon to 5 p.m. on Sunday. A Current fave? The Hot Lei, a spicy and power-packed green juice with kale, pineapple, ginger, apple, spinach, cucumber, parsley and cayenne. Don’t forget to return the glass bottle for 50 cents off your next purchase. sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 47


t e e r t S Beat

Bistro coffee co.

TUE - THU 7AM - 10PM FRI - SAT 7AM - 10:30PM SUNDAY BRUNCH 11AM - 2PM HAPPY HOUR TUE - SAT 3PM - 6PM

2512 N. MAIN AVE | 210-320-2099 | BEATSTREETCOFFEE.COM

VOTED BEST JAPANESE RESTAURANT BY THE ZAGAT DINING GUIDE 2008-2011 VOTED BEST JAPANESE/

SUSHI RESTAURANT

BY WHERE THE LOCALS EAT 2010

SUSHI HAPPY HOUR

TUES & THURS 5 - 6PM

LUNCH 11AM-2:30PM DINNER 5-10PM

SATURDAY 5-10PM CLOSED SUNDAY

11203 WEST AVENUE 78213 • 210.348.6781

48  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


FOOD

WWW.KAISUSHISA.COM 2535 NW Loop 410 • 210-340-8888 | 12146 Nacogdoches RD. • 210-946-8866

HAPPY HOUR SPECIAL Buy one APPETIZER get one FREE | Sushi starts at $1 Sushi rolls start at $4.95 ENJOY HAPPY HOUR BEER SPECIALS MON-FRI 3PM-6PM (VANCE JACKSON LOCATION ONLY)

H Wine List Dough Pizzeria Napoletana 6989 Blanco, (210) 979-6565, doughpizzeria.com This is by now a familiar theme, but the best wine list is not necessarily the biggest or the one most dressed to impress; if that were the case then steakhouse stalwarts such as Bohanan’s, Morton’s and Fleming’s would be considered tête de cuvée. No, for dyed-in-the-wool winos, the best list is the one most carefully calibrated to the restaurant’s food, that most explores a region (or regions) in depth and that has a range of non-knee-jerk offerings at several price points. Minnie’s Tavern and Sandbar are both good candidates, but today’s winner is, ta-dah: Dough. The list ranges from skittish young frizzantes in both white and red to elder-statesman offerings such as a $310 Amarone. By-the-glass selections start at $8, a floral falanghina from Campania can be had at $40 a bottle and a lusty red from volcanic soils around Sicily is yours for $32. Bello.

sushi making class

Pizza 1. Dough Pizzeria Napoletana 6989 Blanco, (210) 979-6565, doughpizzeria.com Keep calm and make awesome pizza. At least that seems to be the motto Lori and Doug Horn, owners of Dough, have ascribed to since opening their restaurant to a flood of hungry San Antonians. The eatery has expanded its digs several times over, most recently making room for a second wood-burning oven, and the pies are still to die for.

2. Stella Public House 1414 S Alamo, Ste 103, (210) 277-7047, stellapublichouse.com

3. MAAR’s Pizza & More 14218 Nacogdoches, (210) 599-7400, maarspizzaandmore.com

Special offer $39 per person. Limited time only Make & Enjoy 2 Sushi Rolls Green Tea & Edamame Appetizer On Arrival Japanese Ice Creams for Dessert Sushi-Making Kit to Take Home Brief Educational Overview of Japanese Sake & Wine Pairings.

Every Sunday at 3:30pm by reservation only 210.340.8888 sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 49


MODERN MEXICAN

5 Star Chef specializing in

IN A CASUAL,RELAXED, NO NONSENSE SETTING

European fusion cuisine with a kick of

Mediterranean flair.

MONDAY-FRIDAY SUNDAY BRUNCH

Tapas Social Hour 5-7:30p Daily Beer Specials Friday Lunch Specials 11a-3p

10a-1p with bottomless mimosas until 3p

• Located in the heart of the 5 Points neighborhood • Historical location circa 1883 • Outdoor and indoor dining • 24 beers on tap -wine house-made sangria • Free wifi

Best Brunch

in San Antonio: Sat - Sun 11 AM to 5 PM

Now Serving Lunch, Dinner & Happy Hour: 11AM - 2 AM

Mon-Wed-Thu: 5-11 (Closed Tuesday) | Fri-Sat: 11-12 | Sun 10-6 1012 N. Flores, SATX 78212 • (210) 277-7174 • tapsytapas.com

14415 Blanco Road |(210) 408-2670 |tostbistro.com

EXPIRES: 05/06/2014

50  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


FOOD

Food Truck 1. Say.She.Ate (210) 446-8257, facebook.com/saysheatetx

2. Rickshaw Stop (210) 902-9308, rickshawstop-sa.com

3. Where Y’at Food Truck (210) 420-0069, whereyatsa.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 51


$10.99 LARGE 16” ONE TOPPING

CARRY-OUT • DELIVERY 5999 DeZavala Dr. Post Office Center 210.691.2070

10555 Culebra Rd. Just inside 1604 210.256.7663

GREAT DINE-IN ATMOSPHERE 12411 Bandera Rd. Just outside 1604 210.695.9933

www.romespizza.com

52  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


FOOD

Korean Restaurant 1. Ilsong Garden 6905 Blanco, (210) 366-4508, ilsonggarden.com

A Barbecue Tradition since 1950 1150 Austin Hwy. •San Antonio, Texas 78209 (210) 828-2829 • www.bunnbarrel.com

2. Koreana 2458 Harry Wurzbach #5, (210) 804-0019, facebook.com/koreanasa

3. Kiku Garden 4527 Goldfield, (210) 662-6699

Thai Restaurant 1. Thai Dee 5307 Blanco, (210) 342-3622, thaideesa.com

WITH SUPERB THAI CUISINE, SUSHI & SAKE BAR, & DELICIOUS BUBBLE DRINKS.

2. Tong’s Thai 1146 Austin Hwy, (210) 829-7345, tongsthai.com

3. Thai Chili Multiple locations, thaichili.net

Brunch 1. Candlelight 3011 N St. Mary’s, (210) 738-0099, candlelightsa.com

2. Magnolia Pancake Haus Multiple locations, magnoliapancakehaus.com

3. Feast 1024 S Alamo, (210) 354-1024, feastsa.com

1146 AUSTIN HWY • 210.829.7345 • TONGSTHAI.COM

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 53


On A Mission Of Nutrition.

INTEGRATIVE HEALTH CLUB The Elevate Life Wellness Integrative Health Club is an innovative, masterfully effective, and sensible way to understand your body and to develop a complete functional wellness plan.

We Offer Programs In Wellness & Nutrition Weight Loss Massage Yoga Enduranetics ™ Medical Exams Chiropractic Services Acupuncture

JUICER HEROES

San Antonio’s Original Raw Juice Bar. Mon - Fri 7am - 5pm Sat 9am - 3 pm 15337 San Pedro Ave (210) 233-9958

NEW LOCATION NOW OPEN! Eilan across from The Rim

Stone Oak at Hardy Oaks Blvd.

Opening Summer 2014

15701 San Pedro Ave San Antonio, TX 78232 210-490-2223 info@elevatelifewellness.com

SA’S ONLY 100% VEGAN & GLUTEN FREE RESTAURANT

NOW SERVING BREAKFAST! MON-FRI: 8 – 11A | LUNCH AND DINNER: 11A-8:30P SATURDAY BRUNCH BUFFET: 11A-3:30P | FARM TO TABLE DINNER: SAT. 4:30-8:30P

8407 BROADWAY • 210-826-4223 • MYVEGERIA.COM

54  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 55


HOOKAH & BUBBLE TEA 6565 BABCOCK RD (AT DE ZAVALA) STE. #19

8002 CALLAGHAN RD. STE.#105

COMING JULY 2014! SUCK IT’S BUBBLEOLOGY: BUBBLE TEA, SHAVED SNOW, & ASIAN FUSION TACOS 7220 LOUIS PASTEUR, STE. #105 WWW.SUCKITSA.COM 56  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


FOOD

MYBEERNALL.COM

French Fries

DRIVE THRU BEER ‘N ALL FOR

FIESTA SPECIALS ALL WEEK LONG...TAKE THE PARTY HOME!

1. The Luxury 103 E Jones, (210) 354-2274, twitter.com/theluxurysa The beefed up sammies are great and all, but the crunchy-on-the-outside, soft-on-the-inside fries make this riverside eatery amazing. Try them plain or with “special sauce,” a healthy portion of ketchup, garlic aioli and freshcut white onions. Don’t worry about them getting soggy—these fries can hold their own.

2. The Cove

823 SAN PEDRO AVE | 1331 S.E. MILITARY DR | 5132 WEST AVE

606 W Cypress, (210) 227-2683, thecove.us

3. TIE: La Frite 728 S Alamo, (210) 224-7555, lafritesa.com

The Monterey 1127 S St. Mary’s, (210) 745-2581, themontereysa.com

Vegetarian 1. Green Vegetarian Cuisine Multiple locations, eatatgreen.com Even after relocating from its original location in favor of a spot at the Pearl, Green has kept its veggie game strong. Must be all the plant-based proteins. Veggie burgers, Asian bowls, Italian favorites and satisfying brunches— there’s something for everyone at either location. Don’t miss the 100 percent vegan cupcakes!

2. Vegeria Vegan Restaurant 8407 Broadway, (210) 826-4223, myvegeria.com

3. Señor Veggie 620 S Presa, (210) 228-0073, senorveggie.us

Having a Party? INVITE THE

n e z o r F s l i a t k Coc

Sushi 1. Sushi Zushi Multiple locations, sushizushi.com With a menu so extensive, Sushi Zushi pleases just about everyone from sushi fanatics to skeptical diners who like their fish cooked. Delightful flavors are found in the LIR roll, concocted with the sweet and spicy house-made LIR sauce and the soulful katsu curry. The daily happy hour offers deals on cocktails, sake, appetizers and a different roll each week.

quiris, i a D o g n y or Mka & Coke, r r e b w a r c ellinis, Sdtas, Sangrias, Ja avors! l f Peach Bin x a i l m o l C P a 1 natura & more!2

2. Godai Sushi Bar & Japanese Restaurant 11203 West, (210) 348-6781, godaisushi.com

3. Goro’s Sushi 2619 Mossrock, (210) 349-8117, gorossushisa.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 57


SOUTH TEXAS

Thank you San Antonio!

SPICE COmpany Your Hometown

Spice Store

Since 1985.

Retail - Institutional - Specialty Blends 8oz. - 300lbs. or more

Named in

“The 64 Best Tacos in the Country” by RACHEL RAY

210.436.2280 • 2106 castroville rd • 78237

210.822.9533 • 145 E. HILDEBRAND & McCULLOUGH

Now HiriNg SOUTH

NORTH

Join us for happy hour MoN-ThurS 3-6pm 910 South Alamo • rosariossa.com • 210.223.1806

open MoN-SaT with late night lounge FrI/SaT 9715 San Pedro Avenue • rosariossa.com • 210.481.4100

thank you SA

for making us one

of your favorites 58  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


FOOD

Sandwiches 1. W.D. Deli 3123 Broadway, (210) 828-2322, wddeli.com The quaint and cozy W.D. Deli, housed in a 1920s home, serves soups, sandwiches and salads all made from scratch daily. W.D. has 20 different sammies, including a tasty chicken salad with spinach and a Southwest roast beef with jalapeño cream cheese. Service is quick but waiting is never an issue with Trivial Pursuit cards on tables.

2. Hearthstone BakeryCafe Multiple locations, hearthstonebakerycafe.com

3. The Station Cafe 108 King William, (210) 444-2200, thestationsa.com

Chicken-Fried Steak 1. DeWeses’s Tip Top Café 2814 Fredericksburg, (210) 732-0191, tiptopcafe.com

2. Lulu’s Bakery and Cafe 918 N Main, (210) 224-5001, luluscafeinsa.com

3. Good Time Charlie’s 2922 Broadway, (210) 828-5392, gtcsatx.com

Ad Name: CSR Item #: PCA201110202 Job/Order #: 261730

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Celebrate WITH SINCE 1949

LOWEST PRICES & LARGEST SELECTION

SOMBREROS, PAPER FLOWERS, PAPEL PICADO, SERAPES, BEADS, CASCARONES, PINATAS

SHOP ONLINE AT AMOLS.COM

710 SOUTH FLORES ST. | 210-227-1457

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SHOPPING

H = Critic’s pick

7115 Blanco Rd • Store Hours: Mon-Sat 10am - 7pm | Sun 12pm - 5pm | bikecitysanantonio.com

san antonio

Online at sacurrent.com

H Place to Get Expert Wine Advice Saglimbeni Fine Wines 638 W Rhapsody, (210) 349-5149, jsfinewines.com There’s something to the “where everybody knows your name” nostrum when it comes to wine selection. Decent advice can be had from chain-style stores, but good luck finding the same person twice. Even if you know a name (let’s say the fabulous Joe Baker at Gabriel’s Superstore or super-helpful Heidi Holcomb at Central Market), their availability is a crap shoot. Enter the (possibly endangered) stand-alone shop, among which Saglimbeni’s is preeminent. Not only can you get good advice from the owner, Joe, himself, but once you feel confident enough to admit to, say, Eric that you really do like sweet white wines, they will guide you to the right selection—and keep your secret safe. The Saturday (and sometimes Tuesday night) wine tastings allow you to sample selected wines for yourself, and there’s no better way to build that confidence than first-hand experience.

Recycled fashion including designer wear, basics, jeans and one-of-a-kind items for $ 7 or less!

Propaganda Palace

Olmos Park 145 W. Olmos Drive, San Antonio (210) 832-8838 | buffaloexchange.com

Multiple locations, (210) 400-0240

Buffalo Outlet is part of Buffalo Exchange, LTD.

Video Game Shop

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 63


SHOPPING

GET

Fashion Designer 1. Agosto Cuellar agostocuellar.com With his key role in Una Noche en la Gloria’s Runway en la Calle (above), DJ gigs, the pop-up studio Espacio and a custom-made Cornyation gown for Queen Anchovy, Agosto Cuellar is boldly proving there’s life after Jive Refried. Likely among the reasons readers elected him Best Local Fashion Designer, Cuellar has a keen sense of humor that plays out in culture-mashing collections like 2013’s “San Antokyo.”

2. Deco Tease facebook.com/decotease

3. Jupiter Moon 3 jupitermoon3.com

FOR YOUR TRENDY GENTLY USED

H Place to buy Vinyl Alamo Records & Sheet Music 125 Broadway, (210) 212-4200

1604 AND BANDERA | SILVERADO 16 | 210.372.1311 PLATOSCLOSETNORTHWESTSANANTONIO.COM 630 NW LOOP 410 | 210.979.7711 PLATOSCLOSETNORTHSTARSANANTONIO.COM

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Located among several centuries’ worth of cultural detritus, Alamo Records & Sheet Music sits in a corner of Alamo Antique Mall’s top floor, patiently awaiting vinyl collectors and devotees of pop cultures past. With thousands of records pouring off the shelves and onto the floors, Alamo Records caters to the purest of record nerds, thrilled by the chase of perusing vaguely categorized vinyl stacks. For budget shoppers, Alamo tends to make up its fairly priced tags for their mid-tier releases— we recently picked up a knockoff Blue Note of Herbie Hancock’s Inventions and Dimensions for $8. But for the cream of the unorganized crop, expect a deep wound in your wallet, with original pressings of Beatles’ records reaching the triple digits. An impressive library of jazz, blues, country and oldies-station pop, Alamo Records is the place to itch that analog scratch. A word to the wise: It’s best to call ahead— like their organization, there’s some strange logic to their hours.


Party Central: BaChelorette, Girls’ niGht out, Birthdays, etC.

2014 classes pole fitness levels 1-12, advance-masters • AeriAl yogA • Art of the strip • lyrA & AeriAl DAnce • pole power • booty bAllet • polette

•poleogrAphy • flow • AeriAl stretch • hulA hoop • try me out intro to pole • private & semi private classes

come to Where YoU are celebrated! SAN ANTONIO’S ONLY PREMIERE POLE FITNESS STUDIO

6441 BlanCo rd • 863.3591 • ask for rene softsensuousmoves.Com

FRIEND US sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 65


SHOPPING

Tattoo Shop 1. Element Tattoo Studio 4741 Fredericksburg, (210) 979-9877, elementtattoo.com Recently, on a busy Saturday afternoon a tattoo artist calmly talked a woman out of a trendy, cartoony owl in favor of a “more classic” option. That’s the kind of service Element provides in their stylish digs. A roster of well-established artists are worth the months-long wait, but if you’ve gotta get inked ASAP, Element gives thoughtful attention to walk-ins as well.

2. Dandyland Custom Tattoo & Professional Body Piercing 1821 Bandera, Ste B, (210) 432-5747, dandylandtattoo.com

3. Flesh Electric Tattoo 12510 West, (210) 314-5685, fleshelectricstudio.com

H Locally Crafted Accessories Bexar Goods Co. bexargoods.com The definitive source for high quality, handcrafted leather goods made right here in Bexar County is none other than Bexar Goods Co. Established by three young men of the Rubio family, brothers Falcon and Christian and cousin Guy, Bexar Goods’ products are sold online as well as in a few stores in Austin—and one in Singapore. While there’s no local storefront just yet, the Rubios hope to open a workshop and boutique within the year. At the top end of the register, exquisite leather briefcases, carryalls and messenger bags run from $270 to $875; canvas totes and bags with leather detailing range from $140 to $350; belts fall in the neighborhood of $85; and other accessories, from coasters and mouse pads to dog leashes and collars, cost anywhere between $35 and $95. Head to the website to see these gorgeous goods for yourself.

H Bike Swap Beer/Wine/Liquor Store 1. Gabriel’s Wine & Liquor Multiple locations, gabrielsliquor.com

2. Pig Liquors 712 S St. Mary’s, (210) 226-OINK (6465), pigliquors.wordpress.com

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Frankenbike Location varies, (210) 305-1557, sanantonio.frankenbike.net Living up to its Shelley-influenced name, Frankenbike is like the SA Craigslist bicycle page come alive, with pro and amateur vendors dealing ready-to-ride bikes, parts, accessories and service at competitive prices. Founded in 2005, the swap established itself in San Antonio in 2010 and has been serving the DIY bike culture here since. Changing its location for each monthly meeting, Frankenbike is a moveable feast for bike buffs who enjoy bargaining in a flea market environment.


SHOPPING

H Place to Find a Birthday Card

Boutique (non-fashion)

Sloan/Hall

1. Nine Tails

5424 Broadway, (210) 828-7738, sloanhall.com

4522 Fredericksburg, (210) 330-8690, nine-tails.com

Housed in an Alamo Heights landmark beneath one of the few surviving Mobil Pegasus neon signs, Marcus Sloan and Shannon Hall’s “multi-category lifestyle store” tackles specialized gifting from various angles (jewelry, books, clothing, housewares, fragrance, etc.) but truly takes the cake with its carefully curated wall of refined greeting cards. On a recent visit, standouts from the nicely varied birthday corner included hand-painted creations by Judy Barnes ($6), hip letterpress offerings from Elum Designs ($5.50) and MikWright greetings made from quirky vintage photos ($3.50).

Every once in a while you find one of those unforgettable little shops. You know the kind: It features items that are equal parts unique and nostalgic, that tug at something inside you, conjuring all sorts of memories and experiences. Nine Tails is one of those places. From their assortment of collectible figurines and video game memorabilia to their Japanimation movies and Hello Kitty accessories, the place is like an altar to Japanese pop culture—one you’ll want to go back to time and again, even if just to see what new, quirky merchandise is on display.

RUNNER-UP: On Main Off Main

2. TIE: Love Shack Boutique

Shades of Love

1580 Babcock, (210) 767-9411, theloveshackboutique.com

300 W Bitters, Ste 150, (210) 494-3006, shadesoflove.com

120 W Mistletoe, (210) 737-2323, onmainoffmain.com If the birthday boy or girl in question has a particularly naughty or campy sensibility, On Main Off Main might be the best choice.

3. Ooples

Piercing Shop

Florist

1. Dandyland Custom Tattoo & Professional Body Piercing

1. Artistic Blooms

1821 Bandera, Ste B, (210) 432-5747, dandylandtattoo.com

7863 Callaghan, (210) 696-8080, artisticblooms.com

7460 Callaghan, Ste 410, (210) 370-3203, ooples.com

2. Buddha Box Studios

2. Statue of Design

5337 Glen Ridge, #109, (210) 647-2929, buddha-box.com

509 San Pedro, Ste 103, (210) 829-0636, statueofdesign.com

3. Revolution Ink

3. H-E-B

5623 Evers, (210) 263-9817

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ALWAYS THE BEST SELECTION, PRICE, & VARIETY... Women’s Wednesday LADIES RECEIVE 20% OFF

Thursday “Men’s Happy Hour” 4PM TIL 8PM ALL MEN RECEIVE 20% OFF ALL REGULAR PRICED SALE ITEMS

Everyday Specials:

Rent 1 Get 1 Free Everyday! BUY 3 DVDS GET 1 FREE!

Birthday boys & girls 20% OFF W/I.D

Sensual Sunday

6am til midnight COUPLES RECEIVE 20% OFF

9405 IH-35 @ STARLIGHT • 657-9999 | 11827 HWY 281 N @ NAKOMA • 404-0011 68  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


SHOPPING

f o n o electi s •

S hirts Hat t s e B Thes • Jeans • S Much More! Boot • Buckles & Belts

Boutique (Fashion) 1. Dirt Cheap Distro 600 E Amber, facebook.com/dirtcheapdistro More than a decade ago, Debi Lambright graduated from selling patches at punk shows to owning Dirt Cheap Distro—a snug Southside shop catering to the alternative set. While burlesque/rockabilly/horror fans might find larger emporiums elsewhere, Lambright clearly knows her customers and keeps them coming back for specialties like retro pinup dresses ($29-$95), Killer Klowns T-shirts ($16), locally made hair accessories ($6) and sequined pasties ($11).

2. Montage Vintage 423 W Grayson, (210) 324-0157, montagevintage.com

3. Voge Boutique 1846 N Loop 1604 W, #105, (210) 254-9297, facebook.com/vogeboutique

Comic Book Shop 1. Heroes & Fantasies Multiple locations, heroesandfantasies.com

2. Dragon’s Lair 7959 Fredericksburg, Ste 129, (210) 615-1229, dlair.net/sanantonio

3. Alien Worlds Multiple locations, alienworldscomics.com

210-736-0990

Hours:

Mon-Sat 4522 Fredericksburg Rd. @ 10am-7pm Wonderland of the Americas Mall www.cowtownboots.com

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SHOPPING

Gifts • Lactation Support • Teething Relief • Cloth Diapers • Baby Carrier • Diaper Bags

H Place to Find Quirky Collectibles Yeya’s Antique’s & Oddities 1423 E Commerce, (210) 827-5555 If you know exactly what you’re looking for, you’ll probably have better luck finding it at the maze-like Alamo Antique Mall (125 Broadway) or maybe the fascinating Antiquarian Book Mart (3127 Broadway). But if you want the obscure collectibles to jump out and find you—Yeya’s Antiques & Oddities is the place to go hunting. A spell in the store’s densely packed yard can feel a bit like you’ve wandered into a graveyard for architectural salvage, vintage signage, jukeboxes and scraps of carnival rides. Equally as unusual, the shop’s interior is stacked with art, old-school clocks and such wildcard items as a shadowboxed Eurypeima Spinicrus (tarantula), an old Bollywood poster and even a Hatch Show Print card advertising a concert at the Grand Ole Opry.

Present this ad for 15% off! Limit one per person per visit. Instagram us a selfie with this issue #gobabygoshop Located at the Top of Broadway 6104 Broadway Cuite C-4 Alamo Heights, Texas | 210-313-4239 www.gobabygoshop.com

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H Locally Crafted Clothing The Richter Co. 616 Broadway, therichterco.com Not only has The Richter Co. become a source for men’s and women’s luxurious basics, tailored button-downs and trendy staff T-shirts for a host of new restaurants (see: Grayson Street Eatery, SoBro Pizza and Tuk Tuk Tap Room, just to name a few) designed and crafted right here in the Alamo City, the lower Broadway store has become a chameleon-like social venue for pop-up yoga, Taco Tuesdays and evening soirees. Shop in person (Monday through Saturday 10 a.m. to 7 p.m and Sunday 12 to 6 p.m.) or online.

RUNNER-UP: S.C.R. 3609 Broadway, (210) 375-5882, scrman.com This class-act clothing store for the gents is located on Broadway near the Witte. Short for “style comfort relativity,” the shop sells top-caliber casual and dressy menswear, carefully designed here in SA and produced in Vernon, Calif., by the same manufacturing houses of many major designer labels. sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 71


s • Movies • Pride Jewelry & Gift Items Greeting Cards Books • Mus

WINNER FOR BEST PRICES! 1031 NE Loop 410 210.821.5345

1608 N Main Ave 210.472.2800 EQUAL OPPORTUNITY EMPLOYERS

ovies • Pride Jewelry & Gift Items • Greeting Cards • Books • Musi

ic• Clothing • Dancewear • Shoes • Hosiery • Lingerie & Underwear • Bachelor & Bachelorette Party Supplies • Adult Toys • Magazines • M

c • Art • Clothing • Dancewear • Shoes • Hosiery • Lingerie & Underwear • Bachelor & Bachelorette Party Supplies • Adult Toys • Magazine

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SHOPPING

Vape Store 1. Monster Vape Multiple locations, monstervape.com Monster Vape is blazing a trail as San Antonio’s leader in vaporizing. What sets this shop apart is their desire to inform and educate their customers in addition to selling top-of-the-line products. Their vaping juice bar provides a casual and comfortable experience for new and veteran vapers alike and even offers free juice testing.

2. Thanks for Vaping 16350 Blanco, Ste 117, (210) 479-2770, thanksforvaping.com

3. Texas Vape Stores 1518 Austin Hwy, (210) 822-3244, facebook.com/texasvapestores

H Bang for Your Buck Chicho Boys Fruit Market 1631 S Laredo, (210) 225-7557, chichoboys.com With its intoxicating aromas of fresh fruit and its farm-stand appeal, Chicho Boys has a rare, nostalgic quality that’s driven home by hard-to-beat prices on produce. Although we’ve arrived with a full-on list in hand (especially when cooking for a crowd is in the cards), the Westside gem lends itself to those who just show up to see what looks good. While you won’t find many outlandish offerings (you’ll need to shop elsewhere for pluots, fiddleheads and Romanesco), Chicho Boys stocks a lot more than the basics (turnips, Bosc pears and asparagus are all in the bins) and posts weekly specials on its website. Stopping in on a recent Saturday, we picked up a pound of portobello mushrooms for $3.99 (a full dollar less than youknow-where) and a bountiful, fresh-cut fruit cup for $2.49.

Resale Shop (Fashion)

H Place to Bargain

1. Texas Trash Clothing Exchange

Mission Open Air Market

1710 McCullough, (210) 259-6028, texastrashclothingexchange.yolasite.com

707 Moursund, (210) 923-8131, missionopenairmarket.com

Whether you’re trading in clothes or looking for something one of a kind, you can’t go wrong with Texas Trash Clothing Exchange. They’re a little bit retro and a little bit rock ‘n’ roll, and they even stock the occasional business suit for you punks with day jobs. Like the store says, “recycling is always in style.”

With tacky imports, new plastic toys and other landfill-destined unnecessaries now being the norm at most flea markets, veteran junkers are hard-pressed to find anything a flea would bother burrowing into—sad truths that make a dusty destination like Mission Open Air Market all the more appealing. Encompassing 50-acres, this “mall without walls” is advertised as the “king of bargains” and “a little taste of Mexico 10 minutes from Downtown”—both of which check out, save for the strip club-worthy $6 ATM fee (side note: you’ll need $1 per person to get in the gate). Here, bargaining seems most effective on Sunday afternoons, when dealers would often rather cut a deal than pack it up again. While it can’t compete with Selma-based Bussey’s in terms of collectibles, Mission delivers a distinctly San Antonio experience that comes complete with food trucks (stocked with mini tacos, roasted corn and aguas frescas), excellent people-watching and a misting station under a sign that reads, “Spot free rinse: no soap provided, come sit for a spell.”

2. TIE: Otra Vez Consignment 134 W Olmos, (210) 826-0606, otravezconsignment.com

Montage Vintage 423 W Grayson, (210) 324-0157, montagevintage.com

3. Too Good to Be Threw Multiple locations, toogoodsa.com

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WE BUY GOLD! GET INSTANT CASH NOW!

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JEWELRY REPAIR WHILE YOU SHOP!

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Pinot’s Palette – Alamo Heights #210-832-8004

7959 Broadway #402, San Antonio | AlamoHeights@PinotsPalette.com


SHOPPING

Antiques & Oddities

Pickers Paradise

1423 E COMMERCE ST. |210-827-5555

H Thrift Store

4,000 sq. ft. of Fine antiques, Unique décor, Gifts & collectibles.

13439 Bandera Rd. in Helotes

get 30% with t off

Boysville Auxiliary Thrift 307 W Olmos, (210) 826-2195, boysvillethriftstore.org Due a steady flow of donations culled from the old-school neighborhood of Olmos Park, Boysville Auxiliary Thrift Store can be a well-rounded goldmine, depending on when you hit it. On first glance, the place resembles most thrift stores (with racks of clothing organized by size and discounts based on color-coded tags) but once you start digging you’ll find a fair amount of vintage loot, especially within the glass cases. Well-preserved Madame Alexander dolls ($19.99), ’50s-era vinyl ($1) and an oversized Creepshow comic from 1982 ($39.99) stood out among other tempting treasures on a recent visit. Not surprisingly, the cream of this crop gets displayed in the cabinets housing silent auction items, which rotate every two weeks.

ore

r&m

deco

Tuesday-Saturday: 11am-5:30pm Sunday: 12pm-5pm Monday: Closed (210) 695-2001

ON ALL Rhis ad! priced c egular lothing!

tradeall day y!5pm da y r e v e 12i we buY mon, wed & fr

Store Hours m Mon-Sat:12pm-7p sun:12pm-5pm

DESIGNER,

V I N TA G E ,

F U N K Y,

210.225.9494 4 4 3 w. h i l d e b r a n d

Book Store 1. The Twig Book Shop 306 Pearl Pkwy, (210) 826-6411, thetwig.indiebound.com

2. Nine Lives Books 4907 NW Loop 410, Ste 102, (210) 647-5656, ninelivesbooks.com

3. Imagine Books & Records 8373 Culebra, (210) 236-7668, imaginebookstore.com

Plant Nursery

Outfitting kids for Adventure, Travel & Fun!

1. Rainbow Gardens Multiple locations, rainbowgardens.biz

2. Milberger’s Landscaping & Nursery 3920 N Loop 1604, (210) 497-3760, milbergernursery.com

3. Shades of Green 334 W Sunset, (210) 824-3772, shadesofgreensa.com

Whole Earth Provision Co. WholeEarthProvision.com

Quarry Market at 255 East Basse • 210-829-8888 sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 75


SHADES of

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SHOPPING

H Small Market Gaucho Gourmet 935 Isom, (210) 277-7930, gauchogourmet.com Don’t be confused by its warehouse digs—a stop at Gaucho means visiting the entire Ciorciari family. Brothers Juan Manuel and Luciano will walk you through the aisles of espresso coffee, authentic balsamic vinegar and wee drums of olive oil, while Luciano’s wife Sylvia rings up your basket. Try not getting lost in the aisles of small canned fish, jars of briny olives, frozen goat sausage links, stinky cheeses, loose-leaf yerba mate and Italian cookies. Stop by on Saturdays for lunch specials made with Gaucho products, fresh produce via Johnson’s Backyard Garden and samples cooked by a slew of visiting chefs.

H Place to Obtain Obscure Ingredients Central Market 4821 Broadway, (210) 368-8600, centralmarket.com On any given morning, one can spy a chef or a foodie standing in aisle five of Central Market before rows of salts, rubs and sugars like an old man in a hardware store—examining and contemplating. Are you dreaming of black truffle salt or a coarse pink salt? Find it in aisle five, along with three full racks of spices from Spice Islands, Morton & Basset in San Francisco and Central Market’s own organic, moderately-priced line. Chinese five spice and garam masala are here, too. The real trove of obscure spices, however, is in the bulk food section: za’atar, sumac, star anise, cardamom in pods, seeds and ground, just to name a few. There’s even more salts, like Cypress black lava salt, Hawaiian pink salt and Thai ginger salt. By far the best thing about buying something obscure in bulk is the ability to package however small or large a quantity you need: Beef broth for pho calls for only three star anise and the two or three cardamom pods you need for that batch of Indian basmati rice will barely cost a buck. All of a sudden, your little boneless, skinless chicken breast or salmon fillet seems to hold a lot more potential.

Music Store (instruments, gear, repairs) 1. Robot Monster Guitars

H Ethnic Market Seoul Oriental Food Market 1027 Rittiman, Ste 101, (210) 822-1529 Don’t try finding a website for this joint—you won’t. But you will find just about everything else inside the warehouse-like Seoul Oriental Food Market, and at bargain prices. Its selection of dried seaweed snacks is unparalleled, and you’ll find your fair share of instant ramen for under a buck, a bevy of frozen seafood and the freshest daikon radishes and napa cabbages money can buy (or gallons of ready-made spicy kimchi, if you’re not up to fermenting your own batch). Better still is the café at the back right corner of the market, which cranks out walletfriendly noodle soups, bulgogi and kimchi fried rice ($6-$12.99).

517 E Woodlawn, (210) 320-1710, robotmonsterguitars.com Robot Monster Guitars is as much a museum as it is a store. The mind-bending mixture of vintage guitars and rock ‘n’ roll attitude presents an amazing array of hard-to-find guitars as well as basses, amps and other instruments. The staff, comprised of avid musicians and collectors, is always looking for that next trade or purchase. The folks at Robot can also do repairs—they’ll have your old Fender shredding again in no time.

2. Alamo Music Center 425 N Main, (210) 224-1010, alamomusic.com

3. Redbone Guitar Boutique 255 E Basse, #1085, redboneguitar.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 77


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10.25”x10.27”

CMYK


SHOPPING

retro REPURPOSED We only sell

once a month

BEFORE

the next date is

SAT. MAY 17th

9AM-3PM

AFTER VINTAGE & REPURPOSED HOME DECOR ITEMS

4335 VANCE JACKSON ste. 105 JUST OUTSIDE LOOP 410 • 623.680.3432

Progressive Independent

Jewish Cooperative: ARE YOU CULTURALLY JEWISH?

DO YOU WANT YOUR CHILDREN TO HAVE A STRONG JEWISH IDENTITY? The Kehila Project offers a meaningful, alternative connection for Jewish families. We host lively Shabbat dinners and kidfriendly Jewish cultural activities. We are diverse, progressive, inclusive.

Contact: kehilaproject@gmail.com

Antique Store 1. Charlott’s Antiques 2023 Austin Hwy, (210) 653-3672, charlottsantiqueshop.blogspot.com

2. Karolina’s Antiques 1709 Blanco, (210) 731-9787

3. Alamo Antique Mall 125 Broadway, (210) 224-4354, alamoantiquemall.com

Music Store (records, CDs, tapes) 1. Hogwild Records 1824 N Main, (210) 733-5334, facebook.com/hogwildrecords

2. CD Exchange Multiple locations, cdexchange-sa.com

3. Flip Side Record Parlor 840 SW Military, (210) 923-7811

1518 Austin Highway Ste 24 | 210-822-ECIG (3244) | Texasvapestores.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 79


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SHOPPING

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MOBILE APP DEVELOPMENT PROGRAM

1 • mic 2.447 hell .20 e@ 02 med | 47 iate 19 S ch.e . C du | ongr ww ess w.m Ave edia | AT tech X 7 .edu 874 5

Glenn A. Payne Attorney at Law

Children’s Store 1. Crib & Kids 1309 N Loop 1604 W, #106, (210) 764-2742, cribandkids.com

2. Go, Baby, Go! 6104 Broadway, #4, (210) 313-4239, gobabygoshop.com

All Criminal Cases Handled Criminal Motions Tickets to Revoke Law

Bonds

Let me help you. 24 Hour Service Available

210.227.2963 • 210.22PAYNE • glennpaynelaw@gmail.com

3. Nursery Couture 434 N Loop 1604 W, (210) 494-2627, blog.cadenlane.com/nursery-couture

Bike Shop 1. Bike World

LINGERIE • TOYS • LOTIONS • BACHELORETTE ITEMS & MORE!!!

Multiple locations, bikeworld.com

LOVE SHACK BOUTIQUE

2. Blue Star Bike Shop

is a woman-owned sex toy boutique specializing in body safe products and education. Our mission is to promote healthy & safe sexuality by offering quality products and educational workshops in a fun and comfortable environment.

1414 S Alamo, (210) 858-0331, bluestarbikeshop.com

3. Bicycle Heaven 1931 NW Military Hwy, Ste 121, (210) 342-2453, bicycle-heaven.com

Jeweler 1. Americus Diamond 12362 I-10 W, (210) 561-1000, americusdiamond.com

FEATURED ON WE TV’S HIT SHOW

2. James Avery

1580 BABCOCK RD. • 210.767.9411

Multiple locations, jamesavery.com

3. Dennis Jewelry Co. 14701 San Pedro, (210) 499-1212, dennisjewelry.com

WINNER

(Corner Of Babcock & Callaghan, Next To Gold’s Gym) TheLoveShackBoutique.com facebook.com/theloveshackboutique

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SHOPPING

GREAT CUTS • AWESOME SERVICE • CLASSIC ROCK & ROLL MUSIC FREE ARCADE GAMES • COMPLIMENTARY DRINKS

3 CONVENIENT LOCATIONS IN SAN ANTONIO, TX The Strand 11255 Huebner Rd. #104 210.745.1255

Bandera Oaks (Bandera & 1604 by Chick-fil-a) 11398 Bandera Rd. #205 210.858.7666

dieselbarbershop.com

Wilderness Oak 20711 Wilderness Oak #108 210.776.1522

Farmers Market 1. Pearl Farmers Market 312 Pearl Pkwy, (210) 212-7260, pearlfarmersmarket.com

2. Quarry Farmers & Ranchers Market 255 E Basse, (210) 722-5077, quarryfarmersmarket.com

3. The RIM Farmers Market 17503 La Cantera Pkwy, (210) 854-1116, hillcountryfarmersmarket.org

Sex Toy Shop 1. Love Shack Boutique 1580 Babcock, (210) 767-9411, theloveshackboutique.com

2. Shades of Love 300 W Bitters, Ste 150, (210) 494-3006, shadesoflove.com

3. Adam & Eve 6957 San Pedro, (210) 348-6902, adamevesanantonio.com

Smoke Shop 1. Finck Cigars Multiple locations, finckcigar.com

2. Lazy Daze Multiple locations, lazydazeco.com

3. Club Humidor Multiple locations, clubhumidor.com 82  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


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KEEP THE LIGHTS ON THIS SUMMER.

At the Alamo Colleges, our summer programs keep your kids’ minds (2-18) turned on.* We do it with everything from academic enrichment (reading, math, art, computers) to advanced interest (robotics, fencing, astronomy camp, martial arts) to flat-out fun (basketball camp, dance/cheer camp, secret agent camp). Pick a college. Go online to pick a class or camp. And enroll your student today. Brilliant! SAN ANTONIO COLLEGE

College for Kids (CFK) is academic- and enrichment-based. Courses in Math, Reading, Art, Writing, & Computers

ST. PHILIP’S COLLEGE

K-8 Summer Academy 2014 Academic classes Enrichment classes Special interest camps And more!

NORTHEAST LAKEVIEW COLLEGE

App Adventure: design your own video game Coach Hardy & Dunkley’s Fundamentals of Basketball Camp Robotics Camp The Ultimate Sports, Splash, and Cooking Camp And more!

NORTHWEST VISTA COLLEGE

Children’s Enrichment Program (CEP) offers: Academic: Math, Reading, Science Creative/Activities: Music, Dance, Art, Fencing, Martial Arts KIDS Jam Camps: Art Explorers, Astronomy, Basketball/Volleyball, Dance/Cheer, Secret Agent Camp and more!

PALO ALTO COLLEGE

Summer Camp Summer Swim & Learn to Swim Competitive Swimming Career Discovery STEM Summer Experience

For details, visit: alamo.edu/kidscamps

*Age varies by course. See course information for more details.

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PEOPLE

H = Critic’s pick JOSH HUSKIN

King Anchovy XLIX & Queen Anchovy I

The House of Newman SPECIAL THANK YOU TO THE ROYAL COURT SPONSORS:

Silver Eagle Distributing • Tiwari + Bell PLLC, Andy Tiwari • www.texaslegalpros.com • John Barrera of Kuper Sotheby’s International Realty 1010 South Flores/ Guillermo Nicholas • Jamin Kirkwood, Secure Retirement Solutions • The Friendly Spot Ice House • The Block SA • William Germany Pedernales Brewing • Branchline Brewing • Casey and Juliana Lange • Jason Dady Restaurant Group • Dre and Billie Jo Gutierrez •Tuckers Kozy Korner

TICKETS STILL AVAILABLE: FIESTACORNYATION.ORG

Since becoming a non-profit organization, Cornyation has donated over $1.5M to local charities. Last year’sbeneficiaries include SAAF (San Antonio AIDS Foundation), Beat AIDS (Black Effort Against the Threat of AIDS), andHAC (Help, Action, Care). 86  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

Celebrity

Athlete

1. Tim Duncan

1. Tim Duncan

slamduncan.com

San Antonio Spurs, nba.com/spurs

2. David Robinson

2. TIE: Manu Ginobili & Tony Parker

twitter.com/DavidtheAdmiral

San Antonio Spurs, nba.com/spurs

3. George Strait

3. Drew Bignall

georgestrait.com

Mission CrossFit San Antonio, 827 E Rector, (210) 865-9348, missioncrossfitsa.com


2 0 1 4

VESPA PRIMAVERA N o w i n s t o c k !

2423 AUSTIN HWY • 210.654.0211 • THEMOTORCYCLESHOPSA.COM

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PEOPLE

H Best-Dressed Woman Polly Lou Livingston Although she claims she’s been playing dress up since before she was born, it’s safe to say Victoria native Polly Lou Livingston’s keen fashion sense developed in her father’s bygone department store, M.O. Simon. Growing up around clothes led to Livingston working as a buyer for the store, taking trips to New York to meet with designers and later working in San Antonio as a personal shopper for Frost Brothers, where she earned a nickel on the dollar (“If they spent $500, I got 500 nickels,” Livingston told the Current). Comprised of garments dating back as far as the 1940s, Livingston’s truly eclectic wardrobe—which takes up almost an entire room—seems to have a mind of its own. Take this chestnut for example: “Clothes have personalities. The outfit tells me what it wants at a particular time ... and I do what it says.” Livingston, who voices a yellow-green pygmy elephant named Tree Trunks on the Cartoon Network series Adventure Time, even dreams about clothes and trends. “I seem to know what’s coming up,” she said. “Black and white is back—even for summer. Black and white and gray ... maybe a touch of another color. ... But never wear white shoes after August.”

H Best-Dressed Man Mike Casey “If he ever quit dressing up, I might go home and cry,” fellow best-dressed winner Polly Lou Livingston told the Current about her longtime pal Mike Casey and his distinctive sense of style. A practicing attorney who rides a one-speed bicycle as his primary source of transportation, Casey has been called many (good) things— dandy, urban pioneer and unofficial Mayor of Southtown. So frequently is Casey seen in a vintage suit, straw hat and bowtie that some folks don’t even recognize him when he’s dressed casually. This adorable uniform has a backstory. When his dear friend Bernard Lifshutz (who co-founded Blue Star Arts Complex in the mid1980s) passed away, Casey inherited about 20 of his suits. “In the fall and winter, most of the dress-up things [are] hand-me-downs from Bernard,” Casey told the Current. Even the famous hat has a story. As a founding member of the King William Yacht Club—which has been launching canoes in the San Antonio River every Fourth of July for the last 30 years—Casey purchased a Venetian straw boater hat from Paris Hatters. “It’s got some miles on it,” he said. “But so have I.”

H Art Curator Hills Snyder, Sala Diaz director/curator hillssnyder.com He rarely gives himself marquee billing on the many solo and group exhibitions he puts together every year, but Hills Snyder gets our vote for San Antonio’s best curator. Snyder is the guiding force behind the consistently unique offerings at Sala Diaz, one of SA’s premier contemporary project spaces. He encourages resident solo artists to overtake the unconventional facility at the limits of their imaginations, which has made for some of the most ambitious and original work in town. For group shows, Snyder addresses uncommon but accessible conceptual themes with customary wit; his “Lonely Are the Brave” Contemporary Art Month show at Blue Star five years ago, inspired in part by the 1962 Western film of the same name, set the bar high for SA, and he doesn’t let up. 88  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


PEOPLE

H inventor TIE: Ryan Beltrán, co-founder of Elequa elequatech.com

Tim Jenison, founder of NewTek (pictured) newtek.com Elequa is a water purifying startup company that utilizes electrocoagulation, a simple, inexpensive, chemical-free process that kills bacteria and separates other water contaminants using an electric current. Beltrán, a go-getter who’s dabbled in photography, film, travel and activist causes like Occupy Wall Street, co-founded Elequa and is now working to bring affordable and clean water to families in Mexico. Jack-of-all-trades Tim Jenison founded NewTek in 1986, which led to the development of many successful desktop video production and manipulation software. His most recent cinematic foray, the recently released Tim’s Vermeer, documented his painstaking process of recreating Johannes Vermeer’s The Music Lesson by using lenses, mirrors and a camera obscura in an attempt to prove Vermeer and his contemporaries may have used such technology to acheive their revered style.

Drag Queen 1. Tencha La Jefa facebook.com/tencha.lajefa While most drag performers spend countless hours and gobs of cash trying to emulate glamazons, Tencha La Jefa takes a comedic approach to her alter ego—a dentally challenged queen with foam rollers in her wig. Since entering the drag pantheon a decade ago (on a dare), La Jefa has landed a sweet hosting gig with Rey Lopez Entertainment and even channeled Lady Liberty for our 2013 Pride cover.

2. Toni R Andrews twitter.com/toniraven10

3. Fonda Koxx facebook.com/fonda.koxx sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 89


GET YOUR OFFICE RUNNING

AT TOP SPEED

TOGETHER ON THE FIELD = COLLABORATION AT WORK ASK ABOUT OUR CORPORATE PROGRAM! INFO@SANANTONIOSSC.COM

For your spot visit SanAntonioSSC.com

300+ Guitars in Stock!

PEOPLE

H Sports Fan Shea Serrano, Spurs fan and writer twitter.com/SheaSerrano Much like his man-crush Kawhi Leonard, San Antonio native (though now Houston resident) Shea Serrano became a breakout star for media-obsessed Spurs fans during last season’s NBA Finals. The Highlands alum flexed his writing chops for ESPN’s Grantland and True Hoop blogs in often comedic musings celebrating his beloved Spurs. During San Antonio’s playoff run, Serrano copped to watching Spurs games on DVR after already following the outcome via cellphone score updates. Elsewhere, Serrano recently teamed up with Houston icon Bun-B to release Bun B’s Rap Coloring and Activity Book, and his unique blend of slice-of-life satire can be found anywhere from Texas Monthly to the Village Voice.... But, upon further review, this pick goes to every Spurs fan in Bexar County who endured the heartbreaking Game 6 and tortuous Game 7 of the Spurs vs. Heat finals in real time last year. Bring on the playoffs!

Sportscaster

Meteorologist

1. Greg Simmons

1. Steve Browne

KSAT 12, ksat.com

KSAT 12, ksat.com

2. Don Harris

2. Albert Flores

News 4 WOAI, news4sanantonio.com

News 4 WOAI, news4sanantonio.com

3 Joe Reinagel

3. Bill Taylor

KENS 5, kens5.com

KENS 5, kens5.com

Hairdresser

New, Used, Vintage Guitars, Basses,Amps, Effects and Accessories

1. Sam Paniagua

WE BUY USED GEAR!!

3. Belle Howard

AUTHORIZED DEALER FOR: Wampler, Strymon, Fulltone, Xotic, Boss, Eventide, Fender,

Barber

Medusa the Salon, 2102 McCullough, (210) 320-1556, facebook.com/medusasanantonio

2. Raul Lopez Mint Salon, 1016 S Presa, (210) 224-8522, mintsalon.me

Salon Boutique, 11503 NW Military Hwy, #106, (210) 215-9458, salonboutique.net/salon_sanantonio.html

1. Chris the Barber Clippers, 6991 Blanco, (210) 525-8292, clippersbarbershop-tx.com

2. Jose Luis Granados FOLLOW US ON

Rene Roberts Hair Studio, 1207 McCullough, (682) 224-9969, styleseat.com/joseluisgranados

3. Jordan Rangel

416 AUSTIN HWY • 210.930.3662 • SPACETONEMUSIC.COM 90  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

Diesel Barbershop, 11255 Huebner, Ste 104, (210) 745-1255, dieselbarbershop.com


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PEOPLE

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Photographer 1. Sarah Brooke Lyons Sarah Brooke Photography, sarahbrookephotography.smugmug.com Sarah Brooke Lyons is the photographer behind the community art project 1,005 Faces. (She also shot the Current’s 2013 primary breadwinners cover story.) This popular collection of black-and-white portraits united diverse, unique San Antonians. “The most rewarding aspect of my job is to help people feel good about themselves through a portrait,” Lyons said. With 1,005 Faces, this working, single mother made the city feel good about itself.

2. Angela Michelle Raven Red Photography, (210) 526-1941, ravenredphoto.com

3. Melendrez Entertainment (210) 324-3773, melendrez.smugmug.com

Local to Follow on Social Media 1. Puro Pinche

2. Nina Duran

3. Robert Rivard

twitter.com/puropincheSA

twitter.com/thisninagirl

twitter.com/rivardinsa sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 93


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As a community-oriented fitness facility, our focus is promoting a healthy lifestyle and providing a support network for our CrossFit family. Our members enjoy intimate class sizes with personalized coaching, and workouts scalable to any fitness level. A wide variety of specialized programming includes Women’s Only classes, Olympic Weightlifting and Corporate Wellness. We are in the business of affecting positive change in our members and our community as a whole. Come join our family and let us help you reach your fitness and health goals!

www.SpraySoleil.net

t u o k c e h c e m o C ! n o i t a c o l w e n our mmer 2014 Su

827 east rector • (210) 865-9348 • MissionCrossFitSA.com BRING THIS AD FOR A FREE TRIAL CLASS AND $50 OFF YOUR FIRST MONTH’S MEMBERSHIP! 94  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

Alamo Heights: 822-TANS (8267)

Stone Oak: 497-4826

The BEST Airbrush Studio in San Antonio!


PEOPLE

RICK CANFIELD

NURSE PRACTITIONER ASSOCIATES Dramatic Weight Loss

H Culture Maven Roberta “Nina” Hassele, CAM co-chair facebook.com/ninafrombrooklyn In a city with an art scene as inclusive as San Antonio’s, maybe it’s counterintuitive to single out one person as worthy of this title. Plus, what’s a maven, exactly? Well, Nina Hassele is a damn good example. The Brooklyn native and passionate San Antonio convert is co-chair of Contemporary Art Month, for starters, and instrumental in organizing the horde of events, calendar entries, venues, volunteers, patrons and celebrations during SA’s annual month-long extravaganza. Her meticulously maintained Facebook feed is more informative and diverse than the arts sections of some major publications. She’s a tireless, unpaid, year-round promoter of exhibitions and performances, Kickstarter campaigns, art spaces, theater events and live music. She’s relentlessly cheerful, too.

Author 1. Jenny Browne

15-20 lbs/month

(before exercise) A personalized weekly, medically supervised program using oral medications and weekly lipotropic injections. $140/month LOSE WEIGHT, NO WAIT!

Full Family Practice Office NURSEPRACTITIONERASSOCIATES.COM

Call for an appointment! 210-995-3681

jennybrowne.com With three collections under her name, poet and Trinity University professor Jenny Browne has eked out a quiet but commanding career as a bard (it can still be done, English majors!). Just as impressive as her literary oeuvre is her work as a teacher around SA, sharing her talents with the San Antonio Housing Authority, the Good Samaritan Center and the Borderlands Collective, where she documents the experiences of recently resettled refugees living on the Northwest Side.

2. Sandra Cisneros sandracisneros.com

3. Scott McDowell

Offering Botox, Fillers, Chemical Peels and Hormone Replacement Therapy ACCEPTING ALL NEW PATIENTS $40 PER MEDICAL VISIT ACCEPTING MOST INSURANCE Monthly housecalls available for elderly.

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Become Certified Now,L.L.C OFFERING CERTIFICATION BOOTCAMPS FOR:

ENROLL IN APRIL BOOTCAMPS NOW!! Harness the power of boot camps in new, innovative ways. Stepping stones to reach your future!

20% Discount for Military & Government Employees info@becomecertifiednow.com | becomecertifiednow.com | (210) 858-9224 | FAX: 1-888-753-4547

Open Discussion: G.I. Gurdjieff’s 4th Way 5 L 9 o 0 c a 3 l B Cr o o f a f d e w e a y SAGurdjieffEvents@gmail.com Gurdjieff-Foundation-of-Texas.org

96  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


PEOPLE

State Congressperson/Senator 1. Leticia Van de Putte State Senator, District 26, vandeputte.senate.state.tx.us She ain’t happy with the political direction of Texas. But I bet choosing her as Best State Congressperson/Senator is sure to cheer LVDP right up. After more than two decades serving the Texas Legislature, the Democratic state senator from San Antonio, Leticia Van de Putte, launched her ambitious bid for Texas lieutenant governor in November right here in SA. And as the bold, sharp and not to messed with state senator takes the fight statewide, locals can attest to her sticking up for military families, veterans, students, middle class families, immigrants and women.

2. Mike Villarreal

3. Trey Martinez Fischer

State Representative, District 123, house.state.tx.us

State Representative, District 116, house.state.tx.us

U.S. Congressperson/Senator 1. Joaquín Castro U.S. House of Representatives, District 20, castro.house.gov

2. Ted Cruz U.S. Senate, cruz.senate.gov

3. Lloyd Doggett U.S. House of Representatives, District 35, doggett.house.gov

City Official

Downtown Since 1993

1. Julián Castro Mayor, sanantonio.gov/mayor

2. Diego Bernal City Council member, District 1, sanantonio.gov/council/d1

3. William McManus Chief of Police, sanantonio.gov

Visit our Website for schedule and Upcoming Events.

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PEOPLE

Radio Station, News 1. Texas Public Radio KSTX 89.1 FM, tpr.org The NPR-affiliated local station feeds our brains via the airwaves with the latest need-to-know info, sans spin. From one-hour weekday talk show The Source’s selection of interesting interviews to the state politics-centered Texas Matters, TPR’s reportage delivers the facts, breathes context into topics and opens up the stage to dialogue. And it doesn’t stop at the dial—the TPR blog gives us a continually updated roundup of local and state news.

2. WOAI 1200 AM, woai.com

3. KTSA 550 AM, ktsa.com

Radio Station, Music 1. San Antonio College Radio KSYM 90.1 FM, sacrtfnet.alamo.edu/ksym Living left of the dial in public radio land, student-operated KSYM brings eclectic programming unmatched on the FM airwaves. The core of their sound lies in the Blues/Americana of flagship shows The Sauce and Third Coast Music Network, but KSYM also broadcasts hip-hop, metal, indie rock and good ol’ AAA. It’s music from student and veteran announcers psyched about what they’re playing, and it shows in their set choices and commentary.

2. Mix 96.1 96.1 FM, mix961.com

3. KJ 97 97.3 FM, kj97.com

Radio Talk-Show Host 1. Billy Madison KISS 99.5 FM, kissrocks.com

2. Joe “Pags” Pagliarulo WOAI 1200 AM, joepags.com

3. David Martin Davies Texas Public Radio KSTX 89.1 FM, tpr.org

News Anchor 1. Randy Beamer

2. Steve Spriester

3. Isis Romero

News 4 WOAI, news4sanantonio.com

KSAT 12, ksat.com

KSAT 12, ksat.com

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 99


UPCOMING EVENTS

TICKETS AVAILABLE ONLINE AT

ATTCENTER.COM

All acts, dates and times subject to change without notice. 100  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


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PEOPLE

H Reason to Read the SAN ANTONIO Express-News Josh Baugh, twitter.com/jbaugh Gilbert Garcia, twitter.com/gilgamesh470 Brian Chasnoff, twitter.com/bchasnoff Kolten Parker, twitter.com/KoltenParker Impressing us here at our humble-sized alt-weekly are a few stand-out reporters at the SA daily: Josh Baugh, who gets all up in City Hall’s face; columnist Gilbert Garcia, who refused to overlook former councilman David Medina’s multiple failings; columnist Brian Chasnoff, who famously first reported on Elisa Chan’s homophobic remarks; and straight-out-of college hotshot Kolten Parker—who we’re convinced is actually six people considering how many articles and blog posts he churns out. Keep filin’ those FOIAs, digging through campaign finance records and staying on top of your beats, journos.

H Chef TIE: Stefan Bowers Feast, 1024 S Alamo, twitter.com/StefanBowers

Tim Rattray (pictured) The Granary, 602 Avenue A, twitter.com/ChefTimmyR

Artist 1. Nik Soupé (Soup) (pictured, left) The Paint Yard, 525 San Pedro, (210) 229-1707, thepaintyard.com

2. Lloyd Walsh facebook.com/lloyd.walsh

3. TIE: Robert Tatum

Oscar Galvan

tatumoriginals.com

galvanstudios.org

Filmmaker 1. Bryan Ortiz facebook.com/bryanortizdirector It’s not often that a locally made film makes it to national distribution. Director Bryan Ortiz is part of the team that made this happen for the horror film Sanitarium, starring cult icon Malcolm McDowell. Previously, Ortiz received acclaim for his horror spoof Doctor S Battles the Sex Crazed Reefer Zombies: The Movie.

2. Adam Rocha

3. Scott Langford

San Antonio Film Festival, safilm.com

twitter.com/slangjuice

102  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

Choosing best chef during SA’s gastro-renaissance is basically the culinary version of Sophie’s Choice. Not only do these two chefs exemplify a passion for food in all its forms, both are adding an extra element to the growth of the food scene locally and nationally. Rattray’s hand in bringing in Josh Ozerky’s carnivorous carnival (aka Meatopia) to the Pearl notwithstanding, chef’s collaborative dinners with his renowned peers help bring inventive eats to San Antonio. For his part, Bowers, who will participate in this year’s Austin Food & Wine Festival, is keeping things in the family with his guest chef series that helps showcase local talent including Jennifer Dobbertin (Hot Joy), Robbie Nowlin (Las Canarias), Jeff Wiley (NAO) and Pieter Sypesteyn (Where Y’at). Both chefs deserve a lot of credit for moving our tasty food scene forward.


Horizontal logo with gold drop and no gradation on red

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 103


Congratulations, Winners!

MrPinataSA.com

san antonio

Sponsored BY PMS 186

PMS 872

BLACK PMS 186

OF SAN ANTONIO

OFSANANTONIO

104  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

PMS 872

BLACK


PEOPLE

H Restaurant Service STAFF Biga on the Banks 203 S St. Mary’s, (210) 225-0722, biga.com Ask serious, local food folk which restaurants have the best overall service and these names consistently appear: Bliss, Boudro’s and Chez Vatel Bistro. Also touted, and getting the nod for sheer longevity of its core staff, is Biga on the Banks; some of the servers and managers have even been there since the original location on Locust Street. It’s difficult to mention all, but here are some on the management side: Jon Baumgartner, Michael de la Vega and Missy Ramos. On the floor: Chris Sanders, Gigi Gallegos, Ben Vargas and Cesar Martinez. And behind the bar, Bronson Ketchum and Kim Woods. Many diners ask for favorites by name; one group was even inspired to write a poem, massively excerpted below: “Ode to Biga” … Your hostess greeted us kindly Your chef’s menu was divine And it’s hard to say what we loved more Our server, Chris, or the wine! ...

H City Skeptic Randy Bear concernedinsa.com

CHANGING SKIN. CHANGING LIVES.

DESIGN A CAREER FIT AROUND THE LIFE YOU WANT TO LIVE!

To become a Rodan + Fields Independent Consultant or to REDEFINE the future of your skin, contact:

Alexandra Barron

abarr703@gmail.com http://www.alexmarie.myrandf.com/ http://www.alexmarie.myrandf.biz/

Seemingly always on the scene, blogger and activist Randy Bear makes us think twice about major City of San Antonio developments with his critical insight and natural curiosity. He’s an old school citizen—asking tough questions, attending mundane council meetings and hearings on nitty gritty policy—guided by his evident passion to make San Antonio the best it can be. Leslie Knope would be proud.

Local Activist/Watchdog/Nonprofit Leader 1. Manny Diotte The Ferrari Kid, 17114 Blanco Park Cove, (210) 404-1185, theferrarikid.org

2. Molly Cox SA2020, 112 E Pecan, Ste 1100, (210) 704-1025, sa2020.org

3. Eric Cooper San Antonio Food Bank, 5200 W Old US Hwy 90, (210) 337-3663, safoodbank.org

County Official 1. Nelson Wolff Bexar County Judge, bexar.org/CountyJudge

2. Tommy Adkisson Bexar County Commissioner, Precinct 4, bexar.org/adkisson

3. Susan Parmeleau Bexar County Sheriff, bexar.org/sheriff/Pamerleau.html sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 105


PEOPLE

Real Estate Agent 1. Danny Charbel Keller Williams, 10999 I-10 W, Ste 175, (210) 887-7080, dannycharbel.com

2. Maggie Wilmoth Keller Williams, 10999 I-10 W, Ste 175, (210) 696-9996, sellsanantoniohomes.com

3. Lorena Peña RE/MAX Preferred Realtors, 1846 N Loop 1604 W, Ste 205, (210) 483-5043, sanantoniofamilyhomes.com

Personal Trainer 1. Stephanie Lynn Rodriguez R.A.W. Fitness, riseaboveweakness.com

2. Drew Bignall Mission CrossFit San Antonio, 827 E Rector, (210) 865-9348 missioncrossfitsa.com

FAMILY EVENT!

Chipped Time Race

Sat., May 3, 2014 • 8am Kids run FREE at 9:30am Conception Park 400 E. Theo Ave. 78210

REGISTER NOW

QUEST4SUCCESS.ORG

All proceeds benefit Project QUEST, Inc. Quality Employment Through Skills Training Every $1 donated to QUEST has a return of $15 to the community

MORE ON QUEST AT QUESTSA.ORG

3. Jennifer Trimmier Strong Body San Antonio, (210) 445-0448, strongbodysa.com

Massage Therapist 1. Jeni Spring Heeling Sole Barefoot Massage and Yoga, 1864 Nacogdoches, (210) 560-1992, heelingsole.com Jeni Spring uses Ashiatsu Oriental Bar Therapy, which means all her massages are done with her bare feet for the deepest and most relaxing massages—hands free, folks! Using two overhead bars for balance, Spring moves along your back applying pressure that you just can’t get with a “normal” massage. You’ll be glad you stepped out of your comfort zone.

2. Robert Baldwin Baldwin Massage Therapy, 827 E Rector, (210) 336-8868, baldwinmassagetherapy.com

Burlesque Troupe 1. Stars and Garters Burlesque starsandgartersburlesque.com

SPONSORED BY

2. Scarlet Darlings

106  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

facebook.com/scarletdarlings

3. The Pastie Pops facebook.com/pastiepops

3. Michelle Ann Jimenez Reyes MAJR Massage Therapy, 5152 Fredericksburg, Ste 200D, (210) 508-2277, majrmassage.com


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Second Thursday at McNay

Webb Party

Taste of New Orleans

Oyster Bake

Host your event at the Microsoft Store’s public meeting space! Microsoft Store at the Shops at La Cantera 15900 La Cantera Parkway San Antonio, TX 78256 (210) 507-6650

quarrynails.com • (210) 930-9330 255 E Basse Rd, Suite #1080 In The Quarry Market, Near The Cinema sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 107


H

HIGHLANDER BAR & GRILL

5562 Fredericksburg Rd. • (210)340-4577 HAPPY HOUR Mon – Sat: 7AM – 4PM $3.25 Import Drafts & Mini Margaritas, $2.75 Domestic Drafts Thursday: $3.25 Premium Vodka Specials Tuesday: $3.25 Mini Hurricanes Sunday: $.50 Wings and $3 You Call It! Daily: 4PM – 8PM: $1 off mixed drinks and appetizers!

H 1 (2 H $ B $ a

4

8 H $ $ $ $

OAK HILLS TAVERN

(210) 614-8855 7920 Fredericksburg Rd. HH: $2.50 all draft selections 3pm - 7pm Mon - Fri

WURZBACH ICE HOUSE

10141 Wurzbach (210)877-2100 • HH: 4-8p: Home of the $2.50 Well Drink! $2 Domestic Draft, $3 Import Draft,Daily specials 8 till close

THE IRISH PUB

9726 Datapoint Dr. • 210-692-7620, LIKE US on FB Mondays- $2.50 Fireball & Shiner Irish Tues: $2.50 Jack Daniels & Blue Moon Draft Wed: $3 U Call It, Thurs: $2 Select Liquor Fri & Sat: Drink Specials on FB, Sun: SIN NIGHTS

SHENANYGAN’S SPORTS BAR AND LOUNGE 6422 Babcock Rd. SATX 78249 $1.50 Drafts, $2.50 Wells, $3.50 Vegas Bomb M – F 4:00pm - 7:00 pm

B

11 M C M & E

Q

73 H H D $1

P

26 H S Im P

L

CHARLIE BROWN’S

11888 Starcrest #101 • (210) 496-7092 • charlie-browns.com Sun-Mon HH All Day $2 wells and $6 dom pitchers, Tues-$3 Jager, Wed-$2 Well Tequila, Thurs-$2.50 dom. longnecks, Fri-$2.75 Wells, Sat-$3 Jager

GET LISTED! TO BE FEATURED ON THE CURRENT HAPPY HOUR APP. JUST CALL 210.227.0044 108  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

H C C S $1 B Le

A

71 H &


HOFBRAU AT THE RIM

Home of Dos-A-Rita-Ville • hofbraurim.com 18403 W Interstate 10 @ the RIM. (210) 877-1500 Happy Hour Mon-Fri 3-7 pm $2.50 Well Drinks, $2.50 Select Domestic Bottles, $3 Select Domestic Draft Pints, $4 House Wine, $4.50 Texas Teas Daily appetizer specials

4TH QUARTER SPORTS BAR 8779 Wurzbach Rd. 210-561-4444 HH Every Day: 2p-9p $2.50 Wells & Domestics $4 Domestic Pitchers $3.99 Long Island Pitchers $3 Shot Board

BARRIBA CANTINA

111 W. Crockett St. • 210.228.9876/BarribaCantina.com M-F 3-6pm: $4 Drafts, Wells & $2 Off All Signature Cocktails, Complimentary Chips & Salsa Mon.-Wed. Super HH-$2.50 Domestic Bottles & House Margaritas Downtown Tuesdays- HH Extended til 9pm & $0.50 Mexican Deviled Eggs

QUARRY HOFBRAU & BEERGARDEN

7310 Jones Maltsberger @ Quarry Market (210) 290-8066 Home of the Dos-A-Rita • quarryhofbrau.com HH• M-F, 4-7 pm: $2.50 Wells & Domestic Bottles, $3 Domestic Draft Pints, $4 House Wine, $4.50 Texas Tea, $1 Off Margaritas. Daily appetizer specials

PIRAHNA KILLER SUSHI

260 E Basse Rd #101,78209 • 210.822.1088 HH: 3p-6p Every Day, REVERSE HH Fri-Sat 10:30- 11:30p Sun 9-10p Select Appetizers $8.95, $3 Domestics, $4 Imports $6 Martinis, $4 Hot Sake • PiranhaKillerSushi.com

LOS FROGS

HH • 3pm-6:30pm M-F: $1 Off Mexican Cocktails: La Classica, La Chelada, La Cubana, La (chamoy) Chamochela & our Smirnoff Chamoy Preparado. $1 Off Fresh Fruit Sangria Pitchers, Bottle Beers, Smirnoffs, Wine Coolers, Mikes Hard Lemonade, $2 Draft Beers.

SLACKERS SPORTS- DRINKS- ARCADE 126 W. Rector Dr., Ste 136, Behind North Star Mall Slackersa.com (210)524-0088 $2.50 Domestics, $3 Wells Daily SUNDAY FUNDAY ALL GAMES FREE ALL DAY $3 YOU CALL IT!

MCFINNIGAN’S PUB

7210 Blanco Rd. SATX 78216 • (210)314-4194 EVERYDAY 2-8pm: $3.25 Wells, $3.75 Calls Pints: $2.25 Domestic, $3 Imports 25oz. Mugs: $3.75 Domestic, $5 Imports

FRIENDLY SPOT

943 S. Alamo • 210.224.2337 • Open Mon -Sun 11am- 12am Daily Friendly Draft Specials. Friendly Eatstill MidNight, $3 Domestics All Day! $2 Lone Star, Lone Star Light & PBR

CLUB SIRIUS

228 Losoya St • drinksirius.com Daily Specials • Open-Close: Mon. - $2 Beer Specials, Tue. - $4 Cucumber Shots, Wed. - $$4 Shot Board, Thu. - $4 Dripping Springs Orange, Fri. - $5 Skyy Flavors, Sat. - $5 Grey Goose Cherry Noir, Sun. - $4 Shot Board Hh • 11A-7P: $1.50 Pbr, $2 Domestics, $2.50 Wells, $3 Dos XX & Modelo Especial, $3 Jager, $4 Jagerbombs @ ClubSirius • Factebook.com/TooSirius

SERNA’S BACKYARD SPORTS BAR

12023 Potranco Rd, 1mile outside loop 1604 HH Daily • 2-8p (12p Sundays): $2 Domestic Longnecks • $2.50 Well Drinks, $3 Smirnoff Vodkas (13+ Flavors) sernasbackyard.com • facebook.com/sernasbackyard

BARRACA PAELLA AND TAPAS BAR

Enjoy a complimentary small plate with every beer or wine purchase Tuesday - Friday 4-7 pm

AZUCA

713 S. Alamo St. 210.225.5550 HH: NEVER A COVER; Mon-Sun 4-7p: $3.50 Cocktails & Wine

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Sunday Funday

All Arcade Games are FREE • $3.25 u call it

Daily drink specials $2.75 Dom / $3.25 Wells

Open 7 Days A Week Mon-Fri: 2p-2A • Sat-Sun 1P-2A MORE THAN 15 SCREENS TO WATCH THE PLAYOFFS!

NBA & over 15 craft beers

15 BIG SCREENS

GAMES

AREA 51 • DONKEY KONG GALAGA • GOLDEN TEE GOLF MARVEL VS. CAPCOM MILLIPEDE • MORTAL KOMBAT MS PAC-MAN • PAC-MAN NBA JAM • SIMPSONS NFL BLITZ • TETRIS TEKKEN TAG • CENTIPEDE Darts, Shuffleboard, Air Hockey, Basketball, Pool, Beer Pong, Basket Pong, Giant Jenga, and MORE!

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NIGHTLIFE

H = Critic’s pick

Wine Bar 1. Copa Wine Bar 19141 Stone Oak Pkwy, (210) 495-2672, thecopawinebar.com

2. Zinc Bistro & Bar 207 N Presa, (210) 224-2900, zincwine.com

3. 20Nine Restaurant & Wine Bar 255 E Basse, Ste 940, (210) 798-9463, 20ninewine.com

H Bar to Drink Alone In TBA 2801 N St. Mary’s, tbasatx.com You may start off drinking alone, but by the night’s end, you’ll be sitting amongst a wild cast of regulars and service industry-types just out of work and ready to enjoy one of Jonny Yumol’s latest cocktail concoctions. Perhaps it’s because TBA strikes that perfect balance of neighborhood haunt-meets-cocktail bar that we tend to start the night by our lonesome and end it with new friends. 112  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


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NIGHTLIFE

Bar Service 1. Big Hops Growler Station Multiple locations, bighops.com

2. The Brooklynite 516 Brooklyn, (210) 444-0707, thebrooklynitesa.com

3. Bar 1919 1420 S Alamo, Ste 001, (210) 227-1420, 1919bar.com

Craft Beer Selection 1. Big Hops Growler Station Multiple locations, bighops.com

2. The Friendly Spot 943 S Alamo, (210) 224-2337, thefriendlyspot.com

3. Freetail Brewing Company 4035 N 1604 W, Ste 105, (210) 395-4974, freetailbrewing.com

New Bar/Club 1. Big Hops Growler Station Multiple locations, bighops.com With three locations and more than 25 brews on tap at each spot, Big Hops has pulled off the small, integrity-maintaining chain to popular acclaim in its first year. With beers, many of them Texas’brewed, available in 16-, 32- and the full-on jug of 64-ounces, Big Hops brings an emphasis on size and service to an alreadystrong craft brew scene in SA.

2. Bottom Bracket Social Club 1603 N Colorado, (210) 267-9160, facebook.com/bottombracketsocialclub

3. TBA 2801 N St. Mary’s, tbasatx.com

H Music Selection Tucker’s Kozy Korner 1338 E Houston, (210) 320-2192, tuckerskozykorner.com Though the Eastside mainstay recently changed ownership, Tucker’s Kozy Korner hasn’t dropped its reputation as a dancer’s paradise. And with a roster of the best DJs spinning in SA, don’t expect any breaks to be dropped either. From DJ Pakman’s raucous hip-hop mixes to DJ Cortez and JJ Lopez’s deep, unruly and undeniable soul and disco cuts, trust Tucker’s DJs to bring a block party with the best music you’ve never heard. 114  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


NIGHTLIFE

H Theme Parties

Cocktails

The Brooklynite

1. The Brooklynite

516 Brooklyn, (210) 444-0707, thebrooklynitesa.com

516 Brooklyn, (210) 444-0707, thebrooklynitesa.com

A pioneer of SA’s toddler-stage craft cocktail scene, The Brooklynite is now leading the pack as the premier host of a rotating schedule of zany and fun theme parties. Some of the creative ideas from The Brooklynite’s roster: Cross-Fit and Gym, Pajama, ’80s Cocktail, Tacky Sweater, Hawaiian Christmas and, for all those loners out there, an anti-Valentine’s Day party. Cheers to keeping things interesting.

2. Bar 1919 1420 S Alamo, Ste 001, (210) 227-1420, 1919bar.com

3. Blue Box 312 Pearl Pkwy, (210) 227-2583, blueboxbar.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 115


NIGHTLIFE

H Place for a Sunday Funday Slackers 126 W Rector, slackerssa.com

The

T S BryE’s Strip

t u o g n a H

St.Ma

Stay Tuned for Turtle Racing Wednesdays!

Happy Hour is Everyday • 5pm-7pm $2 Domestic Bottles • $3 Well Drinks • $4 Well Martinis • $3 Topless Blow Job Tuesdays

2407 N. St. Mary’s • Open Everyday Noon-2am 116  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

/saBootleggers

Homework and weekend chores beware; with Slackers’ double threat as a sports and arcade bar, productivity takes a backseat to Sunday fun. Situated just behind North Star Mall, Slackers boasts a wall of TVs to catch each iteration of ESPN and a long list of old-school cabinet games to suck away spare quarters. Who needs sophomoric drinking games when there’s NBA Jam, Tekken, giant Jenga and minihoops? Games are free on Sunday, too. With a happy hour of $3 wells and $2.50 domestics until 9 p.m., Slackers is a great spot to laze away the Lord’s day.

H Specialty Shot Fernet Branca As tasted at Blue Box, 312 Pearl Pkwy, (210) 227-2583, blueboxbar.com It may be cheating to choose straight liquor, but trust us on this one: Skip the nonsense fruity shots and go straight for the Fernet Branca. This amaro is the perfect after dinner stomach settler, palate cleanser, taste bud awakener, breath freshener, bartender’s choice, miracle cure-all for what ails you, hipster Jäger and everything else in between. Fernet is increasingly found in many of the finer watering holes around town, but its foodhappy digestif qualities point us toward the Pearl’s culinary compound, specifically Blue Box, though any nice, stocked bar near your next great meal will do.


EMINEM • PEARL JAM • SKRILLEX • OUTKAST BECK • CALVIN HARRIS • LORDE • LANA DEL REY FOSTER THE PEOPLE • THE REPLACEMENTS • ZEDD M A J O R L A Z E R • T H E AV E T T B ROT H E R S • S P O O N THE HEAD AND THE HEART • BELLE & SEBASTIAN • INTERPOL CHROMEO • BROKEN BELLS • CHILDISH GAMBINO • CHVRCHES ST. VINCENT • PHANTOGRAM • JUANES • THE GLITCH MOB F I T Z & T H E TA NT RU M S • T H E G A S L I G H T A NT H E M • A F I IGGY AZALEA • REBELUTION • ICONA POP • TURNPIKE TROUBADOURS CAPITAL CITIES • PAOLO NUTINI • JENNY LEWIS • BEATS ANTIQUE SAM SMITH • KONGOS • REAL ESTATE • TUNE-YARDS • KODALINE

JAGWAR MA • BLACKBERRY SMOKE • TROMBONE SHORTY & ORLEANS AVENUE MAC DEMARCO • GRAMATIK • LETTUCE • LAKE STREET DIVE • POLIÇA LUCIUS • TEMPLES • OZOMATLI • BLEACHERS • ANA TIJOUX • HOZIER • MØ J. RODDY WALSTON & THE BUSINESS • ROBERT ELLIS • ZOÉ • AND MANY MORE!

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118  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


NIGHTLIFE

Hotel Bar 1. Ocho at Hotel Havana 1015 Navarro, (210) 222-2008, havanasanantonio.com

2. Vbar at Hotel Valencia 150 E Houston, (210) 227-9700, hotelvalencia-riverwalk.com/vbar.htm

3. Menger Hotel 204 Alamo Plaza, (210) 223-4361, mengerhotel.com

Karaoke Night 1. Dad’s Karaoke 2615 Mossrock, (210) 267-5703, facebook.com/dadskaraoke

2. Oak Hills Tavern 7920 Fredericksburg, (210) 614-8855

3. Bootleggers 2407 N St. Mary’s, facebook.com/sabootleggers sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 119


s u i r i S Club N • 228 LOSOYA ST. SU AM -2 ON NO • AM OPEN DAILY NOON -2 M • LESA@DRINKSIRIUS.COM DRINKSIRIUS.CO

Happy Hour 7PM DAILY 11AM $2 PBR cs $2.50 Domesti $2.50 Wells $3 JAGER BS $4 JAGERBOM

eo Mixing d I V S Live DJ eek - 10pm 2 AW 7 Nights

ic Ric l S J D : n o M awz Tue: DDJJNSalic Ric Wed: J Slic Ric Thu: DJ Naawz Fri: D J Slic Ric Sat: D awz Sun: DJ Na

n i p s w ne r u o Try , a e T s a on Tex end Tea! a Leg y o J a L The nfused i o d a s o Rep berry e l k c La Joya u h anero & b a h h t i w

Twitter @ClubSirius Facebook.com/TooSirius 120  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

Friday & t s r i F y r e v E Second Saturday: & DJ DJ Slic Ric Naawz


yOuR FortUNe aWAITS.

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NIGHTLIFE

MON. - SAT.: 2P-2A SUN.: 12P - 2A

MON. - FREE POOL & $3.75 DOS MUGS

4/26 Josh Abbott Band + Green River Ordinance & The Wind + The Wave

TUE. - $2.50 WELLS & $3 EURO PINTS THU. - LIVE MUSIC, $3.25 SOCO, $4.75 JAMESON SAT & SUN $3 WINE FROM 3-9 SUN. - $3.50 FIREBALLS, $3 TITOS & $4.50 ANGRY BALLS SHOTS

HOUR M Y P P P HA Y 2-8 A D Y EVER

SERVICE INDUSTRY SPECIALS EVERY NIGHT

7210 BLANCO RD. • (210)314-4194

5/3 Monte Montgomery

CHECK OUT FRESH DAILY CONTENT AT BLOGS.SACURRENT.COM

5/9 Granger Smith feat. Earl Dibbles Jr.

H Place to Nurse a Hangover

THE

IRiSH PUB

Specials Everyday 5/10 Wade Bowen plus Paul Thorn

MONDAYS:

$3.00 DEEP EDDY FAMILY $3.00 SHINER FAMILY S.I.N.

TUESDAYS:

WEDNESDAYS:

Voted

$3 U Call It

Best

THURSDAY:

$3.00 Angry Orchard Draft $3.00 Fireball

FRIDAY:

$3 Jager & Dos XX Draft

SATURDAY:

Neighborhood Bar

$2.50 All Skyy Vodka Flavors

2013

SUNDAY:

14492 Old Bandera Rd

Helotes, TX • 210-695-8827 For tickets: liveatfloores.com

122  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

521 E Woodlawn, (210) 737-8646, elmilagritocafe.com You’ll often find the previous night’s revelers holding their heads, sunglasses still on, sipping coffee and slowly eating the barbacoa plate or bean and chorizo tacos at this St. Mary’s Strip staple. The service is a bit on the sporadic side, but who cares? When the food finally arrives, it makes everything better. It’s also open super early on Saturday mornings, if you’re more interested in preventing, rather than dealing with, that hangover.

Country Bar

$2.50 Jack Daniels $3.00 Blue Moon Draft

5/16 Turnpike Troubadours

El Milagrito Café

2335 NW Military Hwy, (210) 348-1513, thirstyhorse.net Nightly live music keeps the cowboy boots sliding heel-toe-heel-toe on the dance floor at the Thirsty Horse Saloon. There’s pool tables for the dance-averse and enough bars that a cold brew is never more than a two-step away. No cover means the only lines are on the dance floor.

2. Cowboys Dancehall 3030 NE Loop 410, (210) 646-9378, cowboysdancehall.com

Happy Hour all night long S.I.N.

9726 Datapoint Dr. 210-692-7620

1. Thirsty Horse Saloon

like us on

3. Cooter Browns Saloon 11881 Bandera Rd, (210) 695-5200, cooterbrownssaloon-tx.com


HOME OF THE ORIGINAL

DOS-A-RITA

THE REAL HAPPY HOUR | THE BEST IN PRIVATE DINING ON TAP ALL THE TIME | MUSIC ON THE PATIO

The Quarry 7310 Jones Maltsburger • 210-290-8066 | The Rim 18403 IH 10 West • 210-877-1500 sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 123


y a d s e Tu r u o Y e! t i n TIKI y l ok o r B e at Th

Tequialyas Thursd

with Live Band karaoke

THE MACHINEIC.,

LO O R S 2 DANCEDFJS &2

HE STR ACROSS T

E ET F R O M

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& ACROSS T

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THEY PLAY THE MUS AND YOU BE THE

STAR ROCUPK TO WIN A GIBSON GUITAR SIGN

210-220-1076 121 ALAMO PLAZA

FROM

every , u n e nks iki m i t r c D i s g s a cla Flamin ded. ) m Enjoy a pm-2 inclu 5 ( s w y a a r Tuesd mbrella St and U Private Parties | Happy Hour | Reservations Welcome 516 Brooklyn Ave | 210.444.0707 | www.thebrooklynitesa.com

210-220-1076 121 ALAMO PLAZA

124  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

SIGNED BY ZZ TOP!


NIGHTLIFE

Patio 1. The Friendly Spot 943 S Alamo, (210) 224-2337, thefriendlyspot.com

2. The Cove 606 W Cypress, (210) 227-2683, thecove.us

3. La Gloria 100 E Grayson, (210) 267-9040, chefjohnnyhernandez.com/lagloria

Michelada 1. The Friendly Spot 943 S Alamo, (210) 224-2337, thefriendlyspot.com

2. Ringside Sports 1163 E Commerce, (210) 222-8057

3. TIE: La Gloria 100 E Grayson, (210) 267-9040, chefjohnnyhernandez.com/lagloria

Rosarios Mexican Café y Cantina Multiple locations, rosariossa.com

ALL CREDIT CARDS ACCEPTED • TOURISTS WELCOME

20% OFF MOST BONDS • Est. 1974 1126 WEST COMMERCE AT N.COMAL UNDER THE OVERPASS BEXAR CO. LIC. 25 sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 125


NIGHTLIFE

H Bar Food Arcade Midtown Kitchen 303 Pearl Pkwy, (210) 369-9664, arcademk.com Surely you know this already: The best bar food (no, we’re not talking variations on a theme of pretzels and mixed nuts) isn’t necessarily at the best bar; the best bar food is at a very good bar with an equally good kitchen attached. Or vice-versa. We can all think of several at Pearl alone, but since one must be picked, Arcade is it. Bar manager Christopher Ware is an inventive cocktalian in his own right, but seasonal creations such as the Bamboo with fino sherry, Dolin dry and two bitters seem especially well-calibrated to go with plates like marinated Spanish olives with almonds and feta, and the chili and lime calamari can only be thought of as a perfect last wish before confronting the full-bore Mexican Firing Squad Special, fabricated of blanco tequila with lime, house grenadine, Angostura and soda.

H Cocktail Menu Arcade Midtown Kitchen 303 Pearl Pkwy, (210) 369-9664, arcademk.com Does Arcade have great bar eats because they have great drinks, or is it the other way around? Regardless, Christopher Ware, formerly with Bohanan’s Bar, has crafted a noteworthy menu that boasts vintage libations, such as the Bumble Bee and Ramos Gin Fizz, along with modern creations that pay homage to the cocktail scene’s growth by featuring drinks created by other local bartenders including Jeret Peña, Steven Raul Martín and Matty Gee. And then there’s the fact that Ware managed to whip up a namesake cocktail for the restaurant that, while pink, makes it perfectly acceptable for dudes to sip some bubbles. We’ll drink to that.

H Bartender Andy Hack, Minnie’s Tavern & Rye House 328 E Josephine, (210) 220-1890, twitter.com/ShakeStirChip The best bartender is not the one with the sexiest shake, the coolest vest or the baddest tattoos; the best ‘tender is the one who can read your mood, interpret your desires and deliver a drink to match: mixologist meets psychologist. Recently, several unsung youngsters have impressed—among them, Andy Hack. Hack, previously of that cocktail incubator Bohanan’s, has the enviable job of riffing on rye at Andrew Weissman’s latest restaurant (where he’s also required to know the food menu inside out). Tasked with taking off on a Negroni, he also delivered. Expect exotic bitters, such as the El Guapo Chicory Pecan that spikes the Chic-Choc Old Fashioned with Prichard’s Double Chocolate Bourbon. And, as Hack and a partner are also kickstarting an ice company to supply crystalline slabs, spheres, spears and big-ass cubes, expect to see that, too. This is only the beginning—including more inevitably cutsey drink names. 126  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


NIGHTLIFE

H Authentic Ice House

Hookah Bar

Sanchez Ice House No. 1

1. The Raven Hookah Lounge

819 S San Saba, (210) 223-0588

1255 SW Loop 410, #133, (210) 673-3650, ravenhookah.com

Yes, there are ice houses with a better beer selection or a nicer atmosphere, but we wanted to strip the ice house culture back down to its essentials: cheap, ice-cold beer (properly dressed with real lime and salt, please), friendly folks, a big-ass patio and a legit jukebox. On all these points, Sanchez delivers. Icy bottled beers come in singles ($2 for domestics, $2.50 for imports) or buckets (ridiculously cheap) and you can enjoy them on the expansive concrete slab. During summer days, try to score one of the picnic tables under the lone tree. Also, pump some of that money you’re saving on stupid-cheap Lone Stars into the Westside oldies-oriented jukebox and shake a tail feather on the dance floor. Located almost directly under I-35, Sanchez ain’t much to look at, but it doesn’t have to be; its appeal is in its unpretentious attitude, a sliver of real San Antonio we hope sticks around forever.

The Raven Hookah Lounge has taken your idea of what a smoking lounge should be and made it “nevermore.” By creating an alt-Victorian, steampunk ambiance and filling the space with local entertainers, the Raven presents a truly one-of-akind experience. Not only does the lounge showcase homegrown musicians and poets, they even carry a brand of Texas-produced shisha.

Sports bar

Ladies’ Night

1. Ticket Sports Pub

2. Shisha Café 5500 Babcock, #101, (210) 694-4800, shishacafesa.com

3. Suck It Hookah and Bubble Tea Multiple locations, facebook.com/suckithookah

1. Cowboys Dancehall

420 E Houston, (210) 222-9722, ticketsportspub.com

3030 NE Loop 410, (210) 646-9378, cowboysdancehall.com

2. Slackers

2. Big Hops Growler Station

126 W Rector, Ste 136, slackerssa.com

Multiple locations, bighops.com

3. Shenanygans Sports Bar

3. Cooter Browns Saloon

6422 Babcock, (210) 690-1156, shenanygans.com

11881 Bandera Rd, (210) 695-5200, cooterbrownssaloon-tx.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 127


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NIGHTLIFE

ouTside PaTio For all oF our

sMokers!

Serving San Antonio since 1972

haPPy hour $6.50 Long island iced Teas and $2.25 Schnapps (except premiums) every day!

Friday

$2.75 Wild Turkey

Monday $2.50 Jack, $2 Wells Tuesday “Pick your Licker and Stay with Her” $2.75 , $3.75 Super Premium

saTurday

$2.50 Seagram S7 & Captain Morgan, $2 Jim Beam

Wednesday $2.50 Cuervo Gold & Skyy Vodka

Pool Tables

Thursday $2.50 Effen Cucumber Vodka, $2 Jim Beam

1. Joey’s 2417 N St. Mary’s, (210) 733-9573, joeyssa.com

2. Bombay Bicycle Club

sunday

$2 Bloody Mary’s, Happy Hour all day/night long!

6310 Callaghan Rd • 342-7321

3506 N St. Mary’s, (210) 737-2411, bombaybicycleclubsa.com

11am to 2am Everyday

3. TIE: Bar America 723 S Alamo, (210) 223-1285

McFinnigans 7210 Blanco, (210) 314-4194, facebook.com/mcfinnigans

Old Man Bar 1. Raffle’s 1039 NE Loop 410, (210) 826-7118, rafflesrestaurantandbar.com

2. Bar America 723 S Alamo, (210) 223-1285

3. Esquire Tavern 155 E Commerce, (210) 222-2521, esquiretavern-sa.com

Local Beer

ProudLy SErVinG our MiLiTary SinCE 1974!

SMoKinG PaTio For your ConVEniEnCE

shot specials daily! $2.00 schnapps every day! (excludes super Premiums)

Monday $2 Jim Beam Tuesday $2.50 Pick your liquor! (excludes ultra premiums

Wednesday $1.75 Wells, $2 Jose Cuervo Thursday Military appreciation: happy hour all day, id required

$1.75 draft Mugs, $2.75 Jack

1. Ranger Creek Brewing & Distilling 4834 Whirlwind, (210) 775-2099, drinkrangercreek.com

2. Freetail Brewing Company 4025 Loop 1604 W, Ste 105, (210) 395-4974, freetailbrewing.com

3. Blue Star Brewing Company 1414 S Alamo, Ste 105, (210) 212-5506, bluestarbrewing.com

ladies niGhT every Wednesday & Thursday dJ every saTurday

Friday $2.75 Wild Turkey 101, $3.50 starfuckers saturday $2 Jim Beam, $2 Captain Morgan, $2.75 Bull Blasters sunday $2.25 Bloody Marys,

happy hour open-close

338 VaLLEy Hi dr. 673-5117 noon - 2aM EVEryday

karaoke every Friday!

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200 OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK

TEXAS T PUB

MONDAY-SATURDAY • 8AM-2AM SUNDAY • NOON-2AM POOL•DARTS•SPURS•FREE WIFI

ALL DRAFTS $2.50

$2 DOMESTICS

$2.50 WELLS 121 BROADWAY • (210)271-1058 130  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


NIGHTLIFE

TurnT up Tuesdays no cover for 21 and up All nIGHT DJ Quake & DJ Mister-e mixin’ it up in 2 different rooms $3 wells and Domestics

All new

Thursday college nighT

Gay Bar 1. Sparky’s Pub 1416 N Main, (210) 320-5111, sparkyspub.com

2. Heat 1500 N Main, (210) 227-2600, heatsa.com

3. Bonham Exchange 411 Bonham, (210) 271-3811, bonhamexchange.com

Lesbian Bar 1. Sparky’s Pub 1416 N Main, (210) 320-5111, sparkyspub.com

no cover for 21 and up with college ID $2 wells and Domestics $3 Vegas Bombs The Saint Sorority Sisters Show

WTF Fridays

$2 wells and $3 Domestics $4 Fireball no cover for 21 and up before 11

sTrip doWn saTurdays $200 Coed strip contest at 12:15 weekly Drink specials til 11 $3.50 wells and Domestics after 11

8 0 0 l e x i n g t o n Av e . S AT X 7 8 2 1 2

2. Pegasus Nightclub 1402 N Main, (210) 299-4222, pegasussanantonio.com

3. Wax Club Lounge 2211 San Pedro, (210) 737-9191, facebook.com/waxclublounge

Facebook.com/TheSaintShowbar For more information or party reservations please call 210-225-7330 sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 131


SAN ANTONIO’S PREMIER SPORTS BAR EXPERIENCE

210.222.9722 • 420 e. houston street •ticketsportspub.com 132  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


NIGHTLIFE

Happy Hour 1. Lüke 125 E Houston, (210) 227-5853, lukesanantonio.com

2. Liberty Bar 1111 S Alamo, (210) 227-1187, liberty-bar.com

3. TIE: Cured 306 Pearl Pkwy, Ste 101, (210) 314-3929, curedatpearl.com

Luce Ristorante E Enoteca 11255 Huebner, (210) 561-9700, lucesanantonio.com

Bar You Can Still Smoke In 1. The Lion & Rose (Alamo Heights) 5148 Broadway, (210) 822-7673, thelionandrose.com

Bar Trivia Night 1. The Lion & Rose (Alamo Heights) 5148 Broadway, (210) 822-7673, thelionandrose.com

2. Freetail Brewing Company 4035 N 1604 W, Ste 105, (210) 395-4974, freetailbrewing.com

3. Southtown 101 101 Pereida, (210) 263-9880, southtown101sa.com

Bar Outside 1604 1. TIE: Freetail Brewing Co. 4035 N Loop 1604 W, Ste 105, (210) 395-4974, freetailbrewing.com

The Green Lantern 20626 Stone Oak Pkwy, (210) 497-3722, facebook.com/thegreenlanternsa

2. Big Hops Gastropub 22250 Bulverde, Ste 106, (210) 267-8762, bighops.com

3. The Silver Fox 24802 Ima Ruth Pkwy, (210) 363-2613, silverfoxsa.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 133


The BEST Place to be FRIENDLY!

v

75 TAPS OF CRAFT BREW. OVER 400 BOTTLE & CAN CHOICES.

FRIENDLY EATS UNTIL MIDNIGHT FRIENDLY NACHOS, TACOS, BURGERS & MORE.

2013 BEST OF Winner:

Craft Beer Selection Michelada Patio Dog Friendly Restaurant

KIDS MENU & ICE CREAM TREATS. VEGITARIAN & VEGAN FRIENDLY.

TAKE YOUR FAVORITE BREW HOME IN OUR FRIENDLY GROWLERS! Monday - Friday: 3pm - 12am • Saturday & Sunday: 11am - 12am 943 S. Alamo San Antonio, TX 78205 • 210-224-BEER (2337)

134  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


NIGHTLIFE

Dance Club 1. Brass Monkey 2702 N St. Mary’s, (210) 480-4722, facebook.com/brassmonkeytx Before the Beastie Boys made it funky circa 1987, Brass Monkey was the moniker for a cocktail named after an alleged WWII spy. About as unpretentious as a dance club can get, SA’s own translation—a hip little melting pot with a solid sound system—playfully nods to all of the above with an alt-leaning retro soundtrack, wily DJs and budget booze arguably best thrown back on the low-key patio.

2. Bonham Exchange 411 Bonham, (210) 271-3811, bonhamexchange.com

3. Heat 1500 N Main, (210) 227-2600, heatsa.com

Meat Market Bar 1. The Mix 2423 N St. Mary’s, (210) 735-1313, facebook.com/themix.sanantonio According to our enlightened readership, the most promising place to board the midnight train to pound town is The Mix. With most drinks under $5, this St. Mary’s strip marquee offers the most consistent and promiscuous clientele down for a casual bang. Plus, there’s the couch-filled, make out-friendly room in the back for those looking to get a head start on the action.

2. TIE: Blue Box 312 Pearl Pkwy, (210) 227-2583, blueboxbar.com

Sparky’s Pub

ON THE LARGEST SCREENS

1416 N Main, (210) 320-5111, sparkyspub.com

3. Bootleggers 2407 N St. Mary’s, facebook.com/sabootleggers

214 Losoya St. 78205 | 210-236-7089 sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 135


136  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


I don’t always Fiesta

inbutSan Antonio, when I do it is at the

Flambeau Parade.

Stay Thirsty, my friends

Come party in the Dos Equis Beer Garden

on the Fiesta Flambeau parade route! April 25th 11am - 4pm & April 26th 4pm - 11pm

Corner of North Alamo Street & East Travis Street | Must be 21 to attend

Drink Dos Equis Responsibly sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 137


E. Houston St.

Colle g e St .

600 N. PRESA ST. { INSIDE THE MAVERICK BUILDING} | THELOCALBARSA.COM | 210.267.9885

138  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


NIGHTLIFE

ATTENTION NIGHT SHIFT! FULL BAR OPEN AT 7AM! SERVING BREAKFAST!

Open 7 days

Sun: 11 am - 2 am | Mon-Sat: 7 am - 2 am 5562 Fredericksburg Rd. In the Medical Center

Rock Club 1. Bond’s 007 Rock Club CheCk out fresh daily Content

450 Soledad, (210) 225-0007, bonds007rockbar.com

@ blogs.saCurrent.Com

2. The White Rabbit 2410 N St. Mary’s, (210) 737-2221, sawhiterabbit.com

3. 502 Bar 502 Embassy Oaks, (210) 257-8125, 502bar.com

A PLACE TO DRINK

Exotic Dancers (Males) 1. Hardbodies 2736 N St. Mary’s, (210) 736-4865, hardbodiesclub.com

2. Essence 1010 N Main, (210) 223-5418, facebook.com/ClubEssenceSA

3. TIE: Bonham Exchange 411 Bonham, (210) 224-9219, bonhamexchange.com

Heat Nightclub 1500 N Main, (210) 227-2600, heatsa.com

Exotic Dancers (Females) 1. Sugar’s 2731 NW Loop 410, (210) 340-1289, sugarsperfect.com

(Happy Hour Mon-Fri, 3pm – 7pm $2.50 PINTS)

A PLACE TO SING

(Best of San Antonio 2013, Best Karaoke Night Finalist)

A PLACE TO BE YOURSELF

(Best of San Antonio 2013, Best Dive Bar Finalist)

A PLACE TO EAT!

(Our kitchen is back with new hours Monday - Friday 4 pm - 11 pm and Saturday 6 pm - 1. New menu coming soon!)

A PLACE YOU NEED TO BE!

2. The Palace 2482 NE Loop 410, (210) 599-6011, thepalacemensclubsa.com

3. Allstars Gentleman’s Sports Club 9440 I-10 W, (210) 593-0576, allstarstx.com

7920 Fredericksburg, (210) 614-8855 sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 139


The Place Where Locals Come to Party! Downtown San Antonio’s True Neighborhood Bar

Sat. April 26th 10th Annual Fiesta de Lizard Featuring DJ Donnie Dee

a Live Crawfish Boil Drink Specials

All Day!

8

NEVER A COVER 21 & UP

(210) 271-9494 302 E. Commerce (between presa & navarro) 140  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


NIGHTLIFE

Margarita 1. La Fogata 2427 Vance Jackson, (210) 340-1337, lafogata.com Nothing is more refreshing than a good margarita, especially during the summertime, and La Fogata knows how to make one mean marg. This restaurant also doesn’t mess around with teensy 12-ounce cups. Nope, all of their ‘ritas are served in 16-ounce glasses with an edible orchid to boot. No matter what the flavor, you won’t be let down.

2. Chacho’s Multiple locations, chachos.com

3. La Gloria 100 E Grayson, (210) 267-9040, chefjohnnyhernandez.com/lagloria

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 141


ify ual N q o I O I O N se wh s duation S AS FESSle to throogramfter Gra P UR PRO d availa1b-YearisPtance a O N Y TO AnancialreAhiensivmeent Ass R U I N • Fi Comp Place Ta 5 • Job

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1 • mic 2.447 hell .20 e@ 02 med | 47 iate 19 S ch.e . C du | ongr ww ess w.m Ave edia | AT tech X 7 .edu 874 5

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6565 Babcock rd. cgts210.com 210.690.9292 142  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


NIGHTLIFE

EVERYONE’S TALKING ABOUT

Dive Bar 1. Oak Hills Tavern 7920 Fredericksburg, (210) 614-8855 Possibly the only dive bar on the planet to offer duck confit on its in-house menu, Oak Hills surprises in other ways as well. For instance, while a scruffy cast of regulars call Oak Hills’ home, so too does DJ Mighty Iris, who hosts her Femme Fatale Friday with a mix of welcome throwback tunes from the ‘80s and ‘90s. The beer selection goes beyond Buds and Millers to include a variety of Texas brews on draft and in bottles, and among the liquors are several by Texas distillers like Cinco, Enchanted Rock, Tito’s and Source of All Happiness. But if that’s all too freaky for you, don’t worry, at its most basic, Oak Hills delivers cheap drinks and a friendly atmosphere, which is sometimes all you need.

2. The Mix 2423 N St. Mary’s, (210) 735-1313

3. Hi-Tones 621 E Dewey, (210) 785-8777

SAN ANTONIO’S NEW HOT SPOT FOR SPORTS & MUCH MORE.

25 Plus Flat Screens • NBA League Pass Pool • Air Hockey • Darts • Basketball Skee Ball • Beer Pong • Jenga Jukebox • Live Music • Outdoor Patio Food Truck: 5p-1a

Best-Looking Bartenders 1. Richard Hunter at Oak Hills Tavern 7920 Fredericksburg, (210) 614-8855 When informed that many people had voted him the “best-looking bartender” in San Antonio, Richard Hunter said, “What? Like, as a joke?” We don’t know, hon, but our brief interaction convinced us that Hunter is a ’tender to be recognized, smoldering bedroom eyes or no. This cutie’s unfailingly friendly and helpful to his Tavern patrons and exudes a charisma that has likely caused many a customer to get all twitterpated, whether Hunter knows it or not. So, if you’re looking for mere eye candy to quench your thirst, your quest may be ongoing, but if you want a bartender you can actually see a future with, you’ll wanna hook up with Hunter.

2. Big Hops Growler Station

3. Blue Box Bar

Multiple locations, bighops.com

312 Pearl Pkwy, (210) 227-2583, blueboxbar.com

HAPPY HOUR EVERYDAY: 2-9P

$2.50 Wells | Domestics $4 Domestic Pitchers $3.99 Long Island Pitchers $3 Shot Board OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK: Mon-Fri 2p - 2a • Sat-Sun 12p - 2a 8779 Wurzbach Rd, SA TX 78240 (near medical center) | 210-561-4444 sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 143


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September 17, 2014

2014-2015 INAUGURAL SEASON

The Charlie Daniels Band

S

September 9, 2014

Lou

Bill Cosby - Far From Finished Tour

October 3-4, 2014 Nice Work If You Can Get It

October 14-26, 2014

50 Shades! The Musical

October 24, 2014

November 23, 2014 An Irish Christmas

February 3, 2015

Buddy - The Buddy Holly Story

October 29, 2014

Dave Mason’s Traffic Jam

America’s Test Kitchen

Garrison Keillor

December 11-14, 2014

December 16, 2014

Blind Boys of Alabama with Mavis Staples

December 22-24, 2014

December 10, 2014

Jazz at Lincoln Center Orchestra with Wynton Marsalis

October 28, 2014

Cirque Dreams - Holidaze

February 8, 2015

Itzhak Perlman

February 17-19, 2015

33 EVENTS ON SALE APRIL 26 at 10AM

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer - The Musical

K

February 20, 2015

Kodo - One Earth Tour

Purchase online at tobincenter.org, in person (115 Auditorium Circle), or by phone at 210-223-8624 146  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

J

A


014

osed sical

September 23, 2014

October 1-5, 2014

The Piano Guys

The Telling Project

September 27, 2014

September 20, 2014

The Best of Jethro Tull performed by Ian Anderson

Loudon Wainwright III

November 13, 2014

Colin Mochrie & Brad Sherwood

October 30, 2014

Jeanne Robertson

November 6, 2014

Don Williams

January 18, 2015

November 9, 2014

Dinosaur Train Live!

David Sedaris

January 9, 2015

Kathleen Madigan

February 26, 2015

Arlo Guthrie Alice’s Restaurant

January 16-18, 2015

One Drop of Love

February 27, 2015

The Peking Acrobats

March 2, 2015

Lang Lang

April 10-12, 2015

One Man Star Wars

May 12, 2015

Streetcar Named Desire

www.tobincenter.org sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 147


AROUND TOWN

H UNIQUE Attraction

H = Critic’s pick

South Texas Popular Culture Center 1017 E Mulberry, (210) 792-1312, stpcc.org

H Public Place to Have Sex

San Antonio is home to several eccentric museums and attractions. They’re all charming and earnest and DIY in that puro San Anto way, plus they’re marvelously affordable and accessible. While by now places like the Toilet Seat Art Museum and the Magic Lantern Castle Museum are fairly well known, one has largely evaded mention: The South Texas Popular Culture Center, or Tex Pop for short. Founded by Margaret Moser (a SA native best known as the Austin Chronicle’s forever music critic) and Michael Ann Coker with much assistance by Hickoids’ Jeff Smith and neighboring business Planet K, Tex Pop endeavors to “collect, document, exhibit, preserve and interpret South Texas music and music-related art and history,” and basically prove that while the state capital gets much of the credit for defining pop music in Texas, our region has a muy hip history, too. Since opening in 2012, Tex Pop has made its case via exhibits spotlighting Doug Sahm, the Sex Pistols’ 1978 performance here, Chicano Soul, Augie Meyers and legendary music venue Teen Canteen. The current exhibit on radio personality Bruce Hathaway is the first in a series titled “Alamo Airwaves” that will revisit some of SA’s best-loved music radio stations and DJs. According to Coker, upcoming exhibits will likely include one on the accordion and Flaco Jiménez, the Rolling Stones’ 1964 performance here (“Everybody hated them,” said Coker) and something related to heavy metal. Tex Pop has recently doubled in size, as well, allowing for one permanent collection and one rotating exhibit, plus more space for live music. Stop on by weekend afternoons and like them on Facebook to keep up with all their events.

San Antonio Botanical Gardens 555 Funston, (210) 207-3250, sabot.org

Place to People Watch

Feeling exhibitionist? Too randy to make it home? Digs not suited for bangin’? If you’re caught, sex in public is a Class A misdemeanor, meaning a fine of up to $4,000 and up to a year in the big house. But if Uncle Sam’s discipline adds to the act’s kinkiness, appease that public lust at the San Antonio Botanical Gardens. Try the East Texas Pineywoods area for some backwoods lovin’, or the futuristic Palm and Cycad Pavilion for getting weird in a utopian, tropical setting. Whatever you’re looking for, SABOT offers several backdrops for bumpin’ uglies, from vaguely secluded to all-out on display. But please, check your plant allergies first and avoid the children’s vegetable garden.

BED & BREAKFAST

1. The River Walk thesanantonioriverwalk.com

2. The Shops at La Cantera 15900 La Cantera Pkwy, (210) 582-6255, theshopsatlacantera.com

3. Pearl Brewery 303 Pearl Pkwy, #300, atpearl.com

NAIL SALON

1. King William Manor

1. Mood Boutique Nail Salon

1029 S Alamo, (210) 222-0144, kingwilliammanor.com

23 Brees, (210) 277-7096, moodnailsalon.com

Once known as “The Columns on Alamo,” this 1892 Greek revival mansion boasts a stately bohemian character, with previous reincarnations as a community theater and a bookstore. A modern touch of vintage spans nine distinctly themed guest rooms; a few lead out to the veranda overlooking Southtown. Guests enjoy strolling to galleries and restaurants, and breakfast is served at Madhatter’s Tea House.

The modern and sleek Mood Boutique nailed it with a comprehensive menu of pampering services that include pedicures, nail art and facial waxing in a serene parlor. A collection of the latest nail colors and a friendly staff keep clients returning for a quality ‘cure. The mood at this boutique? Relaxed.

2. O’Casey’s Bed & Breakfast

3. Eva’s Escape at the Gardenia Inn

225 W Craig, (210) 738-1378, ocaseybnb.com

307 Beauregard, (210) 223-5875, evasescape.com

148  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

2. The Vanity Room SA 11703 Huebner, Ste 201 #38, (210) 414-6985, thevanityroomsa.com

3. Ann’s Nails and Spa 280 E Basse, Ste 101, (210) 832-8801, annsnailsandspa.com


AROUND TOWN

H Urban Legend The Haunted Railroad Tracks Corner of Shane and Villamain Roads Featured on Unsolved Mysteries and Fact or Faked: Paranormal Files, the haunted railroad tracks (aka “the ghost tracks”) on the city’s South Side carry a spooky legend that draws thrillseekers to the intersection of Shane and Villamain Roads. A school bus accident on the tracks many years ago still haunts the area—it’s said if you leave your car idle on the tracks supernatural energy will cross your vehicle over; if you pour flour on your bumper, tiny handprints will appear; and, if you listen closely, you may hear faraway screams. Perhaps the creepiest element of all: Until this day, no one has ever found any existing record of the tragic accident...

H Place to Entertain a Kid Morgan’s Wonderland 5223 David Edwards, (210) 495-5888, morganswonderland.com

H SA Place That Feels Like NYC Lawrence Markey Gallery 311 6th, (210) 228-9966, lawrencemarkey.com Next time your East Coast-loving relations turn up their snotty noses at San Antonio’s perceived lack of posh, take them to Lawrence Markey Gallery. Markey, a SA native, did in fact spend several years in NYC’s art world, operating his eponymous gallery there from 1990-2004, first in SoHo and then on the Upper East Side near the Whitney. Markey’s San Antonio space, which he opened in 2005, has the gritty urban reuse feel of SoHo (courtesy of an airy downtown warehouse renovated by Lake|Flato and modified by New York architect Andrew Berman) and the exclusivity of an UES gallery (note the subtle little door plaque in place of a business sign and the lack of front-facing windows). There’s also a lovely garden terrace open during receptions for pretending that we don’t actually live in the climate of Mordor. Then, of course, there’s the artists and exhibitions: Markey has displayed works by well-known international artists like Suzan Frecon, Fred Sandback, Lawrence Weiner, James Castle and Wayne Thiebaud. Though he primarily focuses on works on paper, his latest exhibition (which you can still catch if you hurry, it ends April 25) features some captivating paintings on canvas by John Zurier. You likely won’t see Markey’s next exhibit splashed on billboards and fullpage ads, but you can get on the mailing list by contacting info@lawrencemarkey. com or by visiting during regular gallery hours (how very New York!) from noon-5 p.m. Tuesday-Friday. For any serious art lover here, it’s worth it.

Water, sand, swings and trains are as universal as it gets for child’s play. Billed as “the world’s first ultra-accessible theme park,” Morgan’s Wonderland was designed specifically for special needs children, but it easily appeals to all kids. Only a few years old, the 25-acre park is fresh, spacious, friendly and relaxed. While it features traditional rides like a colorful carousel and a locomotive train, what makes the park spectacular are the free-play areas for children with and without disabilities. The Butterfly Playground and Pirate Island Playground are surprisingly modern, safe and fun. They beat the pants off any playground in the city and broad canopies shade them, making for an outdoor experience that’s actually tolerable come summer vacation. There are seesaws, rolling-pipe slides and swings galore. Plus, everything is wheelchair-accessible, which means a soft, rubber surface and a lot of space. The Music Garden, water play area and Sensory Village feature playscapes with activities that rival the best children’s museums in Texas. Their take on the ever-popular pretend grocery store includes a bubbling toy lobster aquarium. There is a small lake with a fishing wharf, and the pièce de résistance: an enormous sand circle with miniindustrial diggers, buckets and toys. (A word to the wise: let the kids play in the sand first, so they can shake it out at the park and not in the car.) There is a concession stand with plenty of picnic areas and you can bring your own food. Admission is free for children with special needs and children under two years old. Otherwise, admission for children ages three to 10 years is $10; general admission is $15. All proceeds support the park and its programs for special needs children.

RUNNER-UP: Splashtown San Antonio 3600 N I-35, (210) 227-1400, splashtownsa.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 149


New Students

First Month Unlimited

$75

3619 Broadway Street Suite 1 | 210.296.7718 | acpoweryoga.com

150  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


AROUND TOWN

H Bathroom to Sneak into as a Non-customer

during Fiesta Starbucks

Multiple locations, starbucks.com We’re going to break our own rule here and nominate a non-local business as the best place to sneak into as a non-customer during Fiesta. For one, locally owned businesses downtown have it tough as it is without your cheap, stanky asses fouling up their joints. For two, Starbucks is known as the haven for weenie bladders worldwide, because the bigwigs realize that once one has relieved oneself, a venti iced sugar-free hazelnut latte suddenly sounds much more appealing. And for three, there’s plenty of Starbucks downtown alone: one by River Center Mall, one on St. Mary’s and Houston and one on McCullough and Quincy. Just remember, while it’s corporate policy to give furtive whizzers a pass, employees themselves may be less understanding. Since they’re the ones watching the Sbux thrones, make nice and be respectful if they ask you to take your pee-pee dance somewhere else.

H Place to Get High in Public Vacant Building Anywhere (but mainly Downtown) We’ll level with you, this was a toughie because being high in public can be kind of a nightmare for some folks, present company included. But, it struck us that there’s a place where you’re unlikely to run into anyone else, yet which lacks the heavily policed vibe even the most expansive public parks or grimiest bars seem to boast. This is a secret druggies have been using FOR YEARS—the vacant building. Best part: They’re everywhere in San Antonio! If there’s not one in your ’hood, take your pipe downtown, since nearly a third of property there is uninhabited day and night. Second best part: You’ll actually be doing the City of San Antonio a favor. Currently, it’s much easier for the City to take care of these pockets of blight if they can be proved habitually dangerous. Say, if the wrong kind of element was caught repeatedly loitering in the vicinity getting high. While you’re toking, snorting, shooting or what have you, cast your glazed, red eyes around and take note of any potential structural dangers too; that can help strengthen the case against negligent property owners who are likely sitting on the bummer buildings waiting for SA’s seller’s market to get hot enough to unload the pile of crap for a pile of cash. Though the SAPD is unlikely to appreciate your civic service if they bust you, at least you’ll know you’re not a total drain on society.

Bowling Alley 1. University Bowl 12332 I-10 W, (210) 699-6235, ubbowl.com

2. Bandera Bowling Center 6700 Huebner, (210) 523-1716, banderabowlingcenter.com

3. Oak Hills Lanes 7330 Callaghan, (210) 344-6251, oakhillslanes.com

ME#2832 • DEEPER THAN DEEP TISSUE MASSAGE Now Open @ 1864 Nacogdoches, San Antonio TX 78209 • 210.560.1992 sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 151


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EAGLE PASS, TEXAS | 888-25-LUCKY | OPEN 24/7 | LuckyEagleTexas.com 152  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

Must be 21 or older to enter. ©2014 Kickapoo Lucky Eagle Casino Hotel


AROUND TOWN

Pet Grooming 1. Bark of Southtown 1032 S St. Mary’s, (210) 380-8824, barkofsouthtown.com While pets might consider baths torture, leaving our four-legged babies at the groomer can be stressful for us, too. Thankfully for those with separation anxiety, Bark is operated by compassionate animal lovers who go the extra mile—recently evidenced when they offered free nail trims to dogs attending Síclovía. And while you wouldn’t guess it from the name, they even groom cats.

2. Doggie Stylez

No prior insuranc We can h e? elp!

2838 N Loop 1604, Ste 103, (210) 494-2252

3. Lucy’s Doggy Daycare and Spa

Place to Adopt a Pet 1. San Antonio Pets Alive! Animal Care Services, 4710 Hwy 151; Paul Jolly Center for Pet Adoption, 210 Tuleta, (210) 647-2007, sanantoniopetsalive.org Keeping our furry friends out of harm’s way, San Antonio Pets Alive! ensures dogs and cats evade or be removed from kill shelters by offering pet adoption, pet fostering, one-time or monthly donating and volunteer services. Since January 2012, the program has rescued more than 10,000 animals, and another 3,000 pets at the new Paul Jolly Adoption Center, across from the SA Zoo, are expected to find new homes yearly. Readers give our resident pet rescuers two (opposable) thumbs up!

2. Animal Defense League 11300 Nacogdoches, (210) 655-1481, adltexas.org

3. San Antonio Humane Society 4804 Fredericksburg, (210) 226-7461, sahumane.org

Dog Park 1. Phil Hardberger Park West: 8400 NW Military Hwy; East: 13203 Blanco; (210) 226-8339, philhardbergerpark.org Dogs love it and you love it (they exercise while you chill). Your furry loved ones can enjoy two dog parks, each divided into separate areas for small and large dogs. Plenty of water fountains are available, providing a perfect way for your pups to beat the heat. Just expect an exhausted, muddy canine companion on the ride home.

2. McAllister Park 13102 Jones-Maltsberger, (210) 207-7275

3. Lucy’s Doggy Daycare Multiple locations, lucysdoggydaycare.com

© 2014 Titan Insurance, superhero bobblehead and design are service marks of THI Holdings (Delaware), Inc. Titan policies underwritten by Titan Indemnity Company and Affiliated Companies. Home Office: Cleveland, OH. Subject to underwriting guidelines, review, and approval. Price based on March 2010 analysis of available national data for liability-only policies. Products and discounts not available to all persons in all states. All coverages are subject to the deductibles, exclusions and conditions in the actual policy. In Texas: Products underwritten by Colonial County Mutual Insurance Company.

Multiple locations, lucysdoggydaycare.com

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1-800-Titan-Up 848-2687

®

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 153


Day and Night Classes in English & Spanish

HAIR SKIN NAILS

•Full-time or Part-time Programs

•Financial Aid Available for those who qualify

www.vogue.edu

210.807.9226

Be modern - start your professional career with Vogue College of Cosmetology! Vogue College San Antonio 1836 Fredericksburg Rd. San Antonio, TX 78201

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Vogue College San Antonio 6012 Ingram Rd. San Antonio, TX 78238

12

swschool.org 154  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


AROUND TOWN

Public Swimming Pool 1. San Pedro Springs Park Pool 1315 San Pedro, (210) 207-7275

2. Alamo Heights Pool 250 Viesca, (210) 824-2595, heightspool.com

3. Woodlawn Park Pool 1103 Cincinnati, (210) 207-7275

H Sunset Spot Pearsall Park 4700 Old Pearsall, (210) 207-7275 Watching the sunset can be so romantic … which is why you should do it at a former dump on the South Side. Seriously, Pearsall Park, formerly known as Mt. Trashmore when it was the site of a landfill from the 1960s to ’80s, now boasts the best unobstructed, 360-degree views in the city thanks to rolling, treeless hills. There’s also very little structural development there right now, but that should change when Parks and Rec begins spending the $7.5 million awarded to Pearsall in the 2012 bond cycle. While that’s sure to infuse the mainly vacant space with a lot of awesome activity, hit it now for a quiet, breezy overlook unlike anything else in city limits.

Childcare 1. Block and Dreeban School for Young Children Barshop Jewish Community Center of San Antonio, 1200 NW Military Hwy, (210) 302-6846, jccsanantonio.org

H Nonprofit Mission

The JCC’s daycare and pre-school covers children ages six weeks to five years old. The program is accredited by the National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC), and Jewish culture and traditions are integrated throughout daily activities. There are also afterschool programs for grades K-12. And rest easy, staff members are college-educated and well-credentialed to take care of your little one.

San Antonio Food Bank

2. TIE: Colonial Hills United Methodist School 5247 Vance Jackson, (210) 349-1092, colonialhills.info

Discovery World Learning Center Multiple locations, discoveryworldsa.com

3. Country Home Learning Center Multiple locations, countryhomelearningcenter.com

5200 W Old US Hwy 90, (210) 337-3663, safoodbank.org Hungry families have been additionally strained by recent cuts to the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP), or food stamps, and the nonprofit SA Food Bank is feeling the hit as they try to feed the 58,000 residents a week that visit them for services. While the cafeteria hall is utilized as an emergency resource, after the cuts took place, the hall now sees regular use. As President Eric Cooper told the Current earlier this year, the SAFB is under unprecedented demand on their already limited supply. Hats off to our local food bank, working overtime to make up for the loss in food assistance.

RUNNER-UP: Esperanza Peace and Justice Center, 922 San Pedro, (210) 228-0201, esperanzacenter.org

SHOCKINGLY EXCITING!

–New York Times

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sa_current_titos.pdf

1

4/14/14

2:10 PM

TEXAS’

ORIGINAL CRAFT VODKA

C

M

Y

CM

MY

CY

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K

My handmade Texas vodka beats the giant “Imports” everyday. I make and taste every batch at my original distillery in Austin, Texas to ensure you get only the best!” Founder & Owner Master Distiller

2014

156  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


AROUND TOWN

PET BOARDING 1. Lucy’s Doggy Day Care and Spa Multiple Locations, (210) 495-3647, lucysdoggydaycare.com

2. Pawderosa Ranch Doggie Play and Stay Multiple Locations, pawderosaranch.com

3. Green Dog Kennels 610 E Josephine, (210) 930-8600, greendogkennels.com

PLAYGROUND 1. Phil Hardberger Park West: 8400 NW Military Hwy; East: 13203 Blanco; (210) 226-8339, philhardbergerpark.org

2. HemisFair Park 600 HemisFair Way, (210) 207-3677

3. Landa Branch Library 233 Bushnell, (210) 207-9090, mysapl.org

Fiesta Event 1. A Night in Old San Antonio (NIOSA) La Villita, niosa.org

2.King William Fair S Alamo between Pereida and Probandt, kwfair.org

3. Oyster Bake St. Mary’s University, One Camino Santa Maria, oysterbake.com

Non-Fiesta Festival 1. Luminaria luminariasa.org We assume you based your choice on last year’s Luminaria, because this March came and went without the City-sponsored evening extravaganza of arts for all. Last year, news broke that the six-year-old fest was considering major changes like moving the one-night event to the fall and expanding it to 10 days, plus inviting non-local artists to participate. Since then, Luminaria reps have been mum on details.

SATURDAY MAY 10th, 4pm - Midnight $1 TACOS AL PASTOR 4pm - 8pm E E

LIV IC LIV IC S S U MU M VFW POST 76

10th Street & Avenue B

2. Mizuumi-Con Our Lady of the Lake University, 411 SW 24th St, mizuumicon.org

3. Maverick Music Festival La Villita, maverickmusicfestival.com

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AROUND TOWN

Spa

HAIR SALON

1. Spa Black

1. Medusa Salon

7272 Wurzbach Pkwy, #804, (210) 615-6625, spablack.com

2102 McCullough, (210) 320-1556, facebook.com/medusasanantonio

2. Spa D’Sante

2. K Charles & Co

Multiple locations, spadsante.com

Multiple locations, kcharlesco.com

3. The Spa at Folawn’s

201 Jackson Keller, (210) 832-8009, facebook.com/meccahairstudiosatx

14353 Blanco, (210) 408-0101, folawns.com

3. Mecca Hair Studio

PLACE TO WORK ON YOUR LAPTOP 1. Local Coffee Multiple locations, localcoffeesa.com

H Puro San Anto Festival Tejano Conjunto Festival Rosedale Park, 340 Dartmouth, (210) 271-3151, guadalupeculturalarts.org/tejano-conjunto-festival There’s no better place on Earth to catch conjunto than San Anto, the regional mother of the genre. Among the many, many festivals held throughout San Antonio each year, nothing elicits quite the grito that the Tejano Conjunto Festival does. For the past 33 years, the Guadalupe Cultural Arts Center, aided by energetic coordinator (and real deal conjunto player in his own right) Juan Tejeda, has brought the world’s leading tejano and conjunto musical acts and their fans to the heart of the West Side. This year, the jam-packed, three-day festival features some 25 acts, including a first-ever TCF appearance by the re-formed Texas Tornadoes (RIP Doug Sahm), local master Max Baca and Dutch wunderkid Dwayne Verheyden. There’s also workshops, special commemorative presentations, a free seniors dance by conjunto queen Eva Ybarra and plenty of traditional food, drink and merch to check out. For us, the trimmings don’t matter as much as witnessing a true San Antonio stroll around the large dance floor and the octagenarians that seem to reanimate when they hear “Ay Te Dejo en San Antonio” or “Clementina.” The affordable ticket prices (generally less than $20 per day) make it an easy way to unite San Antonians rich and poor, young and old. Mark your calendars for May 14 (the seniors’ dance), and May 16-18 (the main festival). If you miss this event, you’re missing a huge part of our city’s considerable charm.

2. Halcyon 1414 S Alamo, (210) 277-7045, halcyonsouthtown.com

3. Geekdom 112 E Pecan, #11, (210) 373-6730, geekdom.com

VIEW IN THE CITY 1. Tower of Americas 739 E Cesar Chavez, (210) 223-3101, toweroftheamericas.com

2. HemisFair Park 600 HemisFair Way, (210) 207-3677

3. Hays Street Bridge 803 N Cherry

Authentic Jukebox 1. Bar America 723 S Alamo, (210) 223-1285

4522 Fredericksburg, (866) 420-8626, santikos.com

The votes came in before the announcement that Bar America’s new owner would switch the vintage, LP-playing juke box for a streaming number, so let’s consider this a eulogy to the best juke in town. But don’t worry—Roger Miller, Patsy Cline, Ella, various Fats-es and all the favorites of yesteryear will be uploaded into the new machine.

2. Santikos Palladium

2. Tucker’s Kozy Korner

MOVIE THEATER 1. Santikos Bijou

17703 I-10 W, (866) 420-8626, santikos.com

1338 E Houston, (210) 320-2192, tuckerskozykorner.com

3. City Base Cinema

3. Mary Ann’s Pig Stand

2623 SE Military, (210) 531-3000, citybasecinema.com

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We're Pawderosa Ranch.

AROUND TOWN

The doggie play and stay professionals.

CITY PARK 1. Phil Hardberger Park West: 8400 NW Military Hwy; East: 13203 Blanco; (210) 226-8339, philhardbergerpark.org

2. Brackenridge Park 3700 N St. Mary’s, (210) 207-3000, brackenridgepark.org

3. Woodlawn Lake 1103 Cincinnati, (210) 207-7275

www.weloveyourdog.net

SCHERTZ: 210-566-4222 | AIRPORT: 210-404-9941

Start-up 1. Heartfire Media 4242 Woodstock, #206, (800) 235-3964, heartfiremedia.net

2. San Antonio Made by Hand Mercado Travis Park, 301 E Travis, (210) 331-3200, facebook.com/samadebyhand

3. Belle and Bold PR (210) 802-9072, facebook.com/belleandboldpr

7115 Blanco Rd • Store Hours: Mon-Sat 10am - 7pm | Sun 12pm - 5pm | bikecitysanantonio.com

Place to Work 1. Rackspace 1 Fanatical Place, Windcrest, (800) 961-2888, rackspace.com

2. USAA 9800 Fredericksburg, (210) 531-8722, usaa.com

3. Institute for Women’s Health

PERMANENT COSMETICS BY JEANETTE POPHAM DAAM-SPCP

Multiple locations, (210) 349-6626, ifwh.org

MOTHER’S DAY SPECIAL $150 EYEBROWS ($350 VALUE) THE ENTIRE MONTH OF MAY!

DIY Venue 1. SoFlo Market

SPECIALIZING IN:

1344 S Flores, soflomarket.com We admit this is not the answer we expected for this subcategory, but SoFlo is so darn cute it deserves the hype. The one-year-old, pop-up artisan market takes over a warehouse the second Saturday of every month with a small but well curated selection of vendors hawking handmade items from loteríainspired T-shirts to all-natural skincare products and plenty of Spurs-related tchotchkes in between.

2. The Ten Eleven

EYEBROWS • HIGHLIGHTER • EYELINER BLUSH • LIPS • LIP LINER

NOW OFFERING:

LASH PERM & LASH TINT 210-826-8836 • 8503 BROADWAY, SUITE 114 @ LOOP 410 PERMANENTCOSMETICSBYJEANETTE.COM

1011 Avenue B, (210) 320-9080, theteneleven.com

3. TIE: The Renewable Republic

10BitWorks

1903 S St. Mary’s, (210) 338-8810

1020 Roosevelt, 10bitworks.com

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ENTERTAINMENT ALL DAY!

FOOD! DRINKS! KID’S CORNER!

LAST DAY OF FIESTA

SUNDAY APRIL 27, 2014

11AM TILL 11PM

MISSION SAN JOSE CHURCH

701 e. Pyron Ave., sAn Antonio, tX 78214

SANJOSEMISSIONFEST.COM

EnTErTainmEnT

Gibby EscobEdo, Jimmy Edward & ThE oriGinal old school brEEd wiTh robErto Pulido, ram hErrEra & david lEE Garza, max baca y los tExmaniacs wiTh rick TrEvino & auGiE mEyErs, la sanTa cEcilia, bombasTa, dEl casTillo, AmAndA CevAllos and dwaynE vErhEydEn 17 & undEr FrEE all day | 18 & ovEr $8 | FrEE ParkinG | no ouTsidE conTainErs | brinG your own chair sPonsorEd by: budliGht, drEw advErtisinG, Frost banK, biG rEd zEro, nicha’s, KElloGGs, biG rEd zEro, Kiolbassa, surlEan Foods, olE avocado

Quest College

Beauty Health and Wellness

Spring Beauty Specials Cut and Style- $9.99 Facial- $9.99 Brow Wax- $4.99

Call for a appointment 298-2200

Full complement of Beauty Services Available. Located in The RIM shopping Center next to TJ Maxx. 162  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


AROUND TOWN

CrossFit Box 1. Blue Star CrossFit 1 Winnco, (281) 687-5560 bluestarcf.com

2. Mission CrossFit 827 E Rector, (210) 865-9348, missioncrossfitsa.com

3. CrossFit925 crossfit925.com

Museum 1. The Witte Museum 3801 Broadway, (210) 357-1900, wittemuseum.org

2. McNay Art Museum 6000 N New Braunfels, (210) 824-5368, mcnayart.org

3. San Antonio Museum of Art 200 W Jones, (210) 978-8100, samuseum.org

H Outdoor Place to Watch a Movie San Antonio Museum of Art 200 W Jones, (210) 978-8100; (210) 212-9373, samuseum.org; slabcinema.com Rick and Angela Martinez’s Slab Cinema has been “building community through outdoor movie events” since its inception in 2004 (on its namesake concrete slab across from La Tuna) and continues to expand its scope by screening kidfriendly, nostalgic and grown-up films in a growing list of places. While we’re looking forward to seeing how their Movies by Moonlight series fares in the move from Hemisfair to Travis Park in June, we can’t get enough of their pop-ups on SAMA’s serene lawn. Initiated with the cleverly curated Family Flicks series, the Slab/SAMA collab recently branched out with a bar-equipped screening of Much Ado About Nothing—an adult-focused outing the museum plans to continue this summer in conjunction with the exhibition “Matisse: Life in Color.”

Theater Company 1. The Overtime Theatre

H Place to Sleep in Public San Pedro Springs Park 1415 San Pedro, (210) 207-7275 The nearly 50-acre historic San Pedro Springs Park has ample room to get lost in reverie, take a quick nap or just pass out among the verdant scenery. Let the sun rays wash over you while you lay out by the gigantic pool, get some shut eye during a picnic on the grass (FYI, no alcohol allowed) and snuggle up on the gazebo. Even if it’s a rainy day, you can still get your doze on—just step on over to the San Pedro Library, where you’re bound to find some peace and quiet on your Saytown scour for slumber.

1203 Camden, (210) 557-7562, theovertimetheater.org The mission of this Best of SA veteran winner hasn’t changed since the theater’s move from the Blue Star Arts Complex to a two-stage space near the Pearl. Overtime’s plays and musicals are just as eccentric and original, like the upcoming The Canard of Vaucanson by James Burnside (a ridiculous spin on the original first family: Adam, Eve and Cain).

2. The Woodlawn Theater 1920 Fredericksburg, (210) 267-8388, woodlawntheatre.org

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AROUND TOWN

Bike Route 1. Mission Reach sanantonioriver.org/mission_reach/mission_reach.php

2. Leon Creek Greenway sanantonio.gov/parksandrec/greenway_trails_leon.aspx

3. McAllister Park 13102 Jones Maltsberger, (210) 207-7275

SKATE PARK 1. Lady Bird Johnson Community Park 10700 Nacogdoches, (210) 207-7275

2. San Pedro Springs Park 1415 San Pedro, (210) 207-7275

3. The Rollercade 223 Recoleta, (210) 826-6361, therollercade.com

JOGGING TRAIL 1. Phil Hardberger Park West: 8400 NW Military Hwy; East: 13203 Blanco; (210) 226-8339, philhardbergerpark.org

2. Leon Creek Greenway sanantonio.gov/parksandrec/greenway_trails_leon.aspx

3. Mission Reach

HAIR • NAILS • MASSAGE

sanantonioriver.org/mission_reach/mission_reach.php

YOGA STUDIO 1. Southtown Yoga Loft 724 S Alamo, #2, (210) 838-0643, southtownyogaloft.com

2102 McCullough, San Antonio, TX | 210.320.1556

An airy, light-filled loft on South Alamo, Kristal Cuevas’ studio is beloved by locals and out-of-towners for its wood floors, exposed brick and windows in lieu of mirrors. There’s an organic sense of space and practice. Friendly and relaxed, classes include Vinyasa, Ashtanga and Kundalini as well as Friday Night LIVE (flow with live music) and Saturday morning kids yoga.

2. The Synergy Studio 300 E Grayson, #100, (210) 824-4225, thesynergystudio.com

3. The Union Bikram Yoga San Antonio Multiple locations, (210) 569-0611, bikramyogasa.com 164  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


COME IN FOR sailor jerry

Flashback

Friday Special!

17 years, same location! 2970 Pat Booker Rd. 210.659.6629

d e t s u r T t os “America’sdM ” s t c u d o r P t l Source In A u 6957 SAN PEDRO RD. • 210-348-6902 | 5117 FREDERICKSBURG RD. • 210-348-9401

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Calaveras custom tattoos

210-227-7673 • 628 S. St Mary’s 78205

AUSTIN

JEDI 166  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

LARAINE

BRIAN

CARL

JUSTIN

KELLY

4741 Fredericksburg Rd | 210.979.9877

WILLIAM

TYSON


AROUND TOWN

PUBLIC MURAL 1. Underneath It All Artists: David “Shek” Vega and Nik Soupé San Antonio Current building, 915 Dallas

2. Dare to Be Powerful Artists: GirlZone, Jane Madrigal, Andrea Figueroa Westfall Bridge, Westfall & Hackberry

3. The Spirit of Healing Artist: Jesse Treviño Christus Santa Rosa Children’s Hospital, 333 N Santa Rosa

Ask about our Corporate Programs

PUBLIC ART INSTALLATION 1. F.I.S.H. Artist: Donald Lipski San Antonio River Walk, Museum Reach, I-35 underpass

2. Giant Paleta Bike Rack Artist: Casey Cooper and students San Anto Cultural Arts, 2120 El Paso

3. Ballroom Luminoso Artists: Joe O’Connell and Blessing Hancock Theo & Malone underpass at I-35

ART GALLERY 1. Blue Star Contemporary Art Museum 116 Blue Star, (210) 227-6960, bluestarart.org Despite the “museum” moniker, San Antonio’s longest-running contemporary art space has always felt more like a big gallery. Last year, amid a swirl of leadership changes, Blue Star managed to host the gargantuan centerpiece group show for the Texas Biennial. More recently, the institution wisely chose Mary Heathcott as the latest executive director, sure to help this star shine even brighter.

o t 0 8 0 8 6 9 6 0 1 2 : t a ! y s r u e l v l i a l e C d r u o y e l u d e sch

2. Cinnabar Art and Custom Jewelry Gallery 1420 S Alamo, Ste 147, (210) 557-6073, cinnabarart.com

3. Gravelmouth Gallery 1906 S Flores, (210) 367-2528, gravelmouthgallery.com

COMEDY CLUB 1. Laugh Out Loud Comedy Club 618 NW Loop 410, #312, (210) 541-8805, lolsanantonio.com

2. The Overtime Theater 1203 Camden, (210) 557-7562, theovertimetheater.org

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CURRENT EVENTS

Go to sacurrent.com/calendar for even more events

Jay Phillips

WED-SUN

23-27

Cage the Elephant

Jay Phillips COMEDY

Plenty of comics have speculated about what Obama’s pillow talk might sound like, but Jay Phillips takes the premise further by imbuing his impression with pseudo-inspirational come-ons eerily similar to the man himself’s actual State of the Union seduction lines. But Phillips— whom readers might recognize as Scootsie Double Day from Semi-Pro or Boo-Boo Buster from Baby Mama—seems less interested in making political points than in being really funny, a feat he manages to pull off while showing little, if any, of his work. Stories about runaway dogs and beat up friends get guffaws without diagrammable setups and punch lines, and Phillips delivers them with the sort of practiced professionalism that’s easy to confuse with effortlessness, more like a class clown holding court at a crowded house party than a paid laugh-extractor working a club with a two-drink minimum. $16, 8pm Wed-Thu, 8pm & 10:15pm Fri-Sat, 8pm Sun, Laugh Out Loud Comedy Club, 618 NW Loop 410, Ste 312, (210) 541-8805, lolsanantonio.com. —Jeremy Martin

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WED-FRI

23-25

Fiesta Gartenfest FIESTA

Imagine this. After NIOSA-ing a bit too hard, you start to doubt your ability to continue performing your celebratory civic duties throughout the entire course of the week. You wonder, “Can I really eat another gordita or bite my tongue through another round of unsolicited beer showers? Isn’t there an event where I can worship the Fiesta gods, but at a slightly slower speed?” Turns out, you’re in luck. Hosted by the oldest singing society in the state, Beethoven Maennerchor, Fiesta Gartenfest is a celebration of German heritage in Texas and an official Fiesta event that boasts a laid-back and family-friendly atmosphere. At the gorgeous and cozy biergarten, you’ll be treated to live music performed by the 50-piece Maennerchor (among other acts), delicious German food and beer (we recommend German potato salad and Krombacher) and general gemütlichkeit (cheeriness and relaxation). Prost! $5 suggested donation, 5pmmidnight Wed-Fri, 422 Pereida, (210) 222-1521, beethovenmaennerchor.com. –James Courtney

THU

24

Cage the Elephant MUSIC

If you know one Cage the Elephant track, it’s probably “No Rest for the Wicked.” To refresh, it’s the one that sounds suspiciously like a re-write of Beck’s “Loser,” only with a more dangerously catchy chorus. If the rest of the Kentucky band’s catalog didn’t bear the Beck resemblance in sound, it certainly did in style. The quartet’s few albums gleefully sported a “why the fuck not?” spirit, jumping from Cheap Trick’s power-pop, the Arctic Monkeys’ dance-floor alt-rock and Red Hot Chili Peppers’ blue-eyed funk, with no look given to the rearview. Cage the Elephant has settled a bit since those early records, with 2013’s Melophobia leaning in a more streamlined indie-rock direction. However, this approach has yet to dim the group’s electric live show, powered primarily by energetic frontman Matt Shultz. With Cleveland roots-rock combo J Roddy Walston & the Business in the opening slot, expect no rest for the wicked or otherwise. $20, 7pm, The White Rabbit, 2410 N St. Mary’s, (210) 737-2221, c3presents. frontgatetickets.com. —J.D. Swerzenski

THU

24

Shatner’s World FILM

“We Just Live in It” is the inevitable subtitle of William Shatner’s one-man show, which debuted on Broadway in 2012, and of all the solipsists to stake that claim, the one true Captain Kirk probably has the most shut-ins calling him god. If that’s you, dust off the doughnut pillow to watch and enjoy the filmed version, screened for a single night in theaters, regardless of how many times you saw it live on tour. Cheeklicking fans of Shatner’s “Rocket Man,” will hoot at the 83-year-old fitted with a flesh-tone wireless mic for the stereotypical black-box solo-show, but fans of both Shatner and good storytelling hoping for the sort of insight evident on Has Been (his pretty great collaboration with Ben Folds) might take encouragement from this: We haven’t seen Shatner’s World, but we did see Shatner last year, outside a Laurie Anderson show. $12-$15, 7:30pm, Regal Cielo Vista (2828 Cinema Ridge), Regal Huebner Oaks (11075 I-10 W), Cinemark McCreless Market (4224 S New Braunfels), Santikos Rialto (2948 NE Loop 410), fathomevents.com. —JM


Go to sacurrent.com/calendar for even more events

CURRENT

Dead the Poets

THU

24

Dead the Poets MUSIC

Dead the Poets, a collaboration between San Anto natives Kizer and Law, is throwing a positively ill party to celebrate the release of its second album, Korean Mardi Gras. The album itself, which is already available in more or less finished form at kizersoze.bandcamp.com, excels on the strength of Kizer’s sultry yet bangin’ production (which features tons of delightfully brassy samples) and the rappers’ wittily profane flows. But the expansive 21-track behemoth of an album has something for all types of hip-hop lovers—from sassy social commentary to inventive if cringe-worthy similes, from sunny day jaunts to thumping club tracks. Like the album, the show in its honor features some of our best local hip-hop talent, including Chisme’s REL, MADONE and Current-lauded emcee Mr. Composition, among many others. But that’s not all. This unique party will also feature a producer showcase, burlesque dancers and live painting. $5-$15, 9pm, The Falls, 226 W Bitters, (210) 4905553, thefallsbar.com. –JC

Evita

FRI

25

Blue Öyster Cult MUSIC

Depending on your age, watching early umlaut adopter Blue Öyster Cult perform in a parking lot is your chance to either: (a) star in your own Dazed and Confused deleted scene; (b) watch a pretty convincing re-enactment of the night you were conceived; or (c) relapse into biker drugs. At $10 (in advance), that’s a bargain in any case. That BÖC’s best known for “(Don’t Fear) The Reaper” when the group also recorded a song with the chorus “Joan Crawford has risen from the grave,” is a pretty good indicator of what’s wrong with this country. Of the hits, “Godzilla” is maybe the most representative of the band’s scifi-obsessed glam metal, but collaborations with Michael Moorcock (“Black Blade”) and Patti Smith (“The Revenge of Vera Gemini”) are better examples of its actual awesomeness—a band as good as your weird uncle thinks KISS is. With Year of The Snake, Evil Reign, S.A. Territories and The Selfish Machines. $10-$15, 7pm-midnight, GJ Sutton State Parking Lot 2, 321 Center, E Commerce at Cherry, (210) 802-7655, siestafest.com. —Jeremy Martin

SUN

27

Fiesta Blues Heritage Series MUSIC

Sure, Fiesta tends to be dominated by a handful of juggernaut events— NIOSA, Oyster Bake, you know the drill. But increasingly it’s been the more independent, less ruthlessly mobbed events that have given a reason to keep an eye on Fiesta each year. Last year’s Fiesta Blues Heritage Series proved itself one of those off-the-radar events worth checking, and thankfully it’s back around in 2014 to close out Fiesta on Sunday. The organizers have done a nice job of culling talent from across Texas, including R&B belter Lauren Silva, Houston sextet the Ezra Charles Band and Austin-based guitar monster and show headliner Allan Haynes. SA’s own No Refund Band, comprised of members from the San Antonio Blues Society, will open things with a bit of local blues flavor. Set this year at Sam’s, the daytime show should prove as strong a choice as any to cap off the season. $15-$45, 12:30-6pm, Sam’s Burger Joint, 330 E Grayson, (210) 2232830, samsburgerjoint.com. —JDS

TUE

29

Evita

THEATER

There’s no need to cry for Hal Prince, whose Bertolt Brecht-inspired production of Evita toured America for many a moon. (And for the record, we’re all for Brechtian stagings of anything here at the Current. The Music Man would rock.) But Prince’s original production was getting long in the tooth, and it was clearly time for a change: Michael Grandage’s clever and inventive new production—heavy on an “authentic” Buenos Aires ambience— featured Ricky Martin as Che in New York, with Josh Young filling in for the tour. In London, Grandage’s re-imagining of pivotal scenes particularly impressed—it’s tough to top Prince’s iconic “musical chairs” version of “Art of the Possible”—as did Rob Ashford’s terrific tango-inflected choreography. This tour’s leading lady is played by Caroline Bowman, who trades in Manhattan’s Kinky Boots for Evita’s stiletto heels. Evita takes flight—indeed, she will be high-flying, adored—starting April 29 at the Majestic. $26-$86, 7:30pm, The Majestic Theatre, 224 E Houston, (210) 226-3333, majesticempire.com. —Thomas Jenkins

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San Antonio’s BEST Royalty Court Queen of the River Walk: Brandy Lopez, Latin Fusion | King of the River Walk: James Boone, Dick’s Last Resort Princess of the River Walk: Nancy Kilpo, Grand Hyatt Hotel | Prince of the River Walk: Robert Sanchez, The Palm

Duchess of the River Walk: Christine Hernandez, Howl at the Moon | Duke of the River Walk: Mark Metzer, Preferred Landscape & Lighting

Countess of the River Walk: Tina Stolhandske, River City Run | Count of the River Walk: Michael Dudek, Westin River Walk Hotel

(Left to Right:) James Boone, Brandy Lopez, Nancy Kilpo, Christy Hernandez, Robert Sanchez, Tina Stolhandske. Not pictured: Mark Metzer, Michael Dudek

CONGRATULATIONS AND MUCH APPRECIATION TO THE SAN ANTONIO RIVER WALK ROYALTY FOR 2014! Funds raised in their campaigns assist in production of over 20 free events on the world famous San Antonio River Walk. 170  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


Go to sacurrent.com/calendar for even more events SAT

26

306 E. Mitchell, San Antonio, TX 78210

King William Fair

We try our best to be sparing with the word “best” this time of year, but it’s worth pointing out that 46 years into the game, King William Fair still wraps up the best of Fiesta in one wacky package that raises funds for both arts education and community improvements in Texas’ first residential historic district. Simultaneously spoofing and celebrating Fiesta and its traditions, KWF’s 1.5-mile parade steps off at 9 a.m. and rounds up a wild bunch that this year includes tribal belly dancers, cheerleaders, actors, architects, politicians, the Tooth Fairy, “Napoleon and Josephine,” the Cornyation crew, “Fiesta zombies,” a troupe of “poorly costumed cross-dressers and other confused individuals,” a large dancing dog and 22 people masquerading as Taylor Swift. But even if you snooze through the colorful kickoff, KWF’s freak flag flies throughout the day, serving up a sprawling smorgasbord complete with festival fare, live music (courtesy of Cryin’ D.T. Buffkin and the Bad Breath, the Krayolas, Buttercup and many more), a Kids’ Kingdom and nearly 200 art and craft vendors. And did we mention the view? In addition to the dreamy backdrop of King William’s tree-lined streets and Victorian homes, KWF attracts upwards of 40,000 and even dogs get dolled up for the occasion (pet owners are encouraged to read the guidelines at kwfair.org/faqs). $10, 9am-6pm, King William (entrances include S St. Mary’s at King William and S Alamo at Beauregard), kwfair.org. —Bryan Rindfuss

ART

Final week: “Andy Warhol: The Athletes” Commissioned by collector Richard Weisman in 1977, Warhol’s The Athletes comprises screenprinted portraits of Muhammad Ali, O.J. Simpson, Dorothy Hamill, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Chris Evert, Jack Nicklaus, Willie Shoemaker, Rod Gilbert, Tom Seaver and Pelé. $5-$10, 10am-5pm Wednesday-Thursday, 10am-9pm FridaySaturday, 10am-6pm Sunday; San Antonio Museum of Art, 200 W Jones, San Antonio, (210) 978-8100. Mary Ellen Mark: “Man and Beast: Photographs from Mexico and India” Renowned documentary photographer Mary Ellen Mark visits Texas State to speak about her work featured in The Wittliff Collections’ exhibition “Man and Beast.” Attendees are asked to RSVP by emailing thewittliffcollections@txstate.edu. Free, 2pm Sunday; The Wittliff Collections, Alkek Library, Texas State University, 601 University, San Marcos, (512) 245-2313. MujerArtes Mother’s Day Sale Members of the Esperanza Peace and Justice Center’s MujerArtes Clay Cooperative exhibit and sell works celebrating the lives of mothers, grandmothers, tías and daughters from all walks of life. Free, 10am-5pm Saturday-Tuesday; MujerArtes Studio, 1412 El Paso, San Antonio, (210) 223-2585. “Pace Gems” Curated by Linda Pace Foundation’s former Executive Director Maura Reilly and organized by Collection and Exhibitions Officer Kelly O’Connor, SPACE’s inaugural show reflects the late Artpace founder’s collection criteria while highlighting New Yorkbased artists (including Jim Hodges, Glenn Ligon, Marilyn Minter and Wangechi Mutu) alongside SA natives like Franco Mondini-Ruiz, Dario Robleto and even Pace herself. Free, noon-5pm Wednesday-Saturday; SPACE, 111 Camp, San Antonio, (210) 227-8400.

FILM

National Poetry Month Movie: Howl In celebration of National Poetry Month, Central Library screens Rob Epstein’s 2010 film starring James Franco as gay Beat-era poet Allen Ginsberg. Free, 7-8:30pm Wednesday; Central Library, 600 Soledad, San Antonio, (210) 207-2500. Peter Gabriel: Back to Front Recorded live at London’s famed O2 Arena, BAFTA-winning director Hamish Hamilton’s concert film Back to Front offers fans a rare, behindthe-scenes look at Peter Gabriel in celebration of the

Club Movida

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25th anniversary of his seminal album So. $15, 7:30pm Wednesday; Regal Huebner Oaks, 11075 I-10 W, San Antonio, (210) 558-3490. Video Vortex: Turkish Captain America and Santo vs. SpiderMan In T. Fikret Uçak’s low-budget bomb from 1973, the Istambul police call in Captain America and Mexican luchador Santo to put an end to Spider-Man’s latest crime spree—which involves stealing golden statues, attacking strippers in clubs and murdering people with shower heads, speedboat motors and guinea pigs. $1, 10:15pm Sunday; Alamo Drafthouse Westlakes, 1255 SW Loop 410, San Antonio, (210) 677-8500.

THEATER

Catch Me If You Can The Woodlawn stages the first local production of Catch Me If You Can, a musical caper based on a former con artist who passed $2.5 million in forged checks while masquerading as a pilot, a doctor, a lawyer and a US Bureau of Prisons agent. $15-$23, 7:30pm Friday-Saturday, 3pm Sunday; Woodlawn Theatre, 1920 Fredericksburg, San Antonio, (210) 7381117. Godspell Based on the Gospel of Matthew, Stephen Schwartz and John-Michael Tebelak’s ‘70s-era musical Godspell plays out as a series of parables employing a variety of theatrical traditions including pantomime, acrobatics and vaudeville. $20-$33, 8pm Saturday, 4pm Sunday; Cameo Theatre, 1123 E Commerce, San Antonio, (210) 212-5454.

COMEDY

A Night in Pinche San Antonio Award-winning local comedy troupe Comedia A Go-Go takes aim at Fiesta (NIOSA, Kings, Queens, medals, parades, etc.) in an uncensored program combining live sketches and video.$10, 8:30pm Wednesday-Thursday, 8:30pm & 10:30pm FridaySaturday, 8:30pm Sunday; Rivercenter Comedy Club, 849 E Commerce, San Antonio, (210) 229-1420.

FIESTA

15th Annual A Taste of the Northside More than 60 local restaurants serve up cuisine samples, wine, beer and topshelf margaritas at this event benefiting Brighton Center, a nonprofit serving children with disabilities. $55-$60, 5:30-10:30pm Wednesday; The Club at Sonterra, 901 Sonterra, San Antonio, (210) 930-3669.

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014• CURRENT 171


adidas TENT SALE Huge Savings on Footwear, Apparel and Accessories. Best prices of the year!

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(must have bike)

Full calendar of events @ www.walkandrollsa.com For more event information and updated calendar events please call (210) 227-8651 or visit www.walkandrollsa.com

MPO BIKE NIGHT

Join the MPO’s Bicycle Mobility Advisory Committee for a special evening committee meeting to report on the state of cycling in San Antonio and Bexar County. Find out what’s been accomplished and where we are heading.

EMPIRE THEATRE • MAY 28 • 7:30PM

Tickets: Majestic & Empire Theatre Box Office • 800.745.3000 • Ticketmaster.com 172  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

Date: Wednesday, May 14, 2014 Time: 6:00 p.m.* Location: Community Room VIA Metro Center *Open house starts at 6:00 p.m. 1021 San Pedro Meeting starts at 6:30 p.m.


Go to sacurrent.com/calendar for even more events WED

23

Cypress Hill

Twenty-three years after the release of its critically and commercially acclaimed debut, and with a new album rumored to be on the way this year, seminal West Coast gangsta rap tribe Cypress Hill is swinging by Saytown just in time for Fiesta. The show, a part of the eighth annual Siesta Fest, will no doubt have a set list that reads like a greatest hits compilation, with (hopefully) a taste of what’s to come as the Chicano rap pioneers prepare to unleash their first album since 2012’s disappointing dubstep mess Cypress X Rusko. Super fan-friendly prices and a rare chance to see one of golden-era hip-hop’s most successful and influential acts? If you call yourself a hip-hop head, you’d be insane (most likely in the membrane) to miss this one. $10$15, 6pm, GJ Sutton State Parking Lot 2, 321 Center (corner of N Cherry and E Commerce), (210) 802-7655, siestafest.com. –James Courtney

DINNER » DRINKS » MOVIES » EVENTS » TIX & MORE: DRAFTHOUSE.COM » TIX & MORE: DRAFTHOUSE.COM » ALL SHOWS 18 & UP / NO INFANTS » ALL SHOWS 18 & UP / NO INFANTS » HOST YOUR NEXT PRIVATE EVENT » •HOST YOUR NEXT EVENT COMING SOON TOPRIVATE AN@ ALAMO NEAR YOU • » CALL VENUE RENTAL 210-547-3668» » CALL VENUE RENTAL @ 210-547-3668» TIX & MORE: DRAFTHOUSE.COM TIX & MORE: DRAFTHOUSE.COM Alamo: » ALL SHOWS 18 & Only UPat/theNO INFANTS » ALL SHOWS 18 & SPICE UP / NO INFANTS WORLD WITH » HOST YOUR NEXT DRAG PRIVATE EVENTCAST SHADOW » HOST YOUR NEXT April PRIVATE EVENT 26th @ Westlakes » TIX & MORE: DRAFTHOUSE.COM » TIX & MORE: DRAFTHOUSE.COM April 27th @ Stone Oak » ALL SHOWS 18 & It’s UP / NOtoINFANTS imagine improving » ALL SHOWS 18 & UPtough / NO INFANTS this magical concoction of » HOST YOUR NEXT on PRIVATE EVENT » HOST YOUR NEXT pop PRIVATE EVENT music and girl power, but » CALL VENUE RENTAL @ 210-547-3668 we’re @ about to take this film to » CALL VENUE RENTAL 210-547-3668 ”One of the 10 Best the Theaters the World” next level in with a live cast ”One of the 10 Best of Theaters in the World” drag queens! Straight out of CNN International CNN International Vancouver, The Spice Gurls will

SPOTLIGHT EVENTS

prance on stage to lip synch

Interested in our party Please alongpackages? with all of the musical Interested in our party packages? Please numbers in the film, then they’ll visit drafthouse.com/venue_rental/san_anvisit drafthouse.com/venue_rental/san_anleave the serious acting to the tonio “professionals” on screen! tonio Requesting a donation from the Alamo Requesting a donation from the Alamo Drafthouse? Only at the Alamo: Drafthouse? Please submit yourSLEEPAWAY donation request at CAMP II Please submit yourApril donation request at 26th @ Stone Oak drafthouse.com/about/community Angela Baker has undergone drafthouse.com/about/community years of therapy and finally landed herself a job in the last place she should be working facebook.com/SAdrafthouse Camp Rolling Hills. facebook.com/SAdrafthouse

twitter.com/SA_Drafthouse twitter.com/SA_Drafthouse

Third Chamber Thursday:

A Day in Old Mexico For the last six decades, the Asociación de Charros de San Antonio has championed charrería (often described as Mexican rodeo), competing throughout the year and attracting a diverse crowd each April with its beloved Fiesta charreada A Day in Old Mexico. Of the 10 official suertes (competitive roping and riding events performed in period costumes), the all-female escaramuza stands out as a fan favorite as it showcases a team of young ladies demonstrating precision skills while riding sidesaddle in colorful Adelita dresses. $3-$15, 1-6pm Sunday; Charro Ranch, 6126 Padre, San Antonio, (210) 532-0693. A Night In Old San Antonio La Villita takes center stage as 80,000 visitors gather to celebrate in the midst of 240 decorated food and drink booths, more than a dozen entertainment stages and 15 heritage-themed areas. $12-$15, 5:30-10:30pm Wednesday-Friday; La Villita, 418 Villita Street, San Antonio, (210) 207-8610. Battle of Flowers Band Festival More than 3,600 marching band students will compete for five different awards at this 76th annual event presented by the Battle of Flowers Association. In addition to performances such as “Conquistador” (Southside High School), “The Suite Shoppe” (Winston Churchill High School) and “Zombie Apocalypse” (Sandra Day O’Connor High School), the festivities include a Presentation of Colors by Jay High School JROTC and a fireworks finale. $3-$8, 6:30-9pm Thursday; Jerry Comalander Stadium, 12002 Jones Maltsberger, San Antonio, (210) 832-9284. Battle of Flowers Parade Upwards of 350,000 Fiesta fans are expected to attend this cherished, 123-yearold parade led by the Texas A&M Aggie Band and following a theme of The Magic of Make Believe. For details, visit battleofflowers.org. $12-$25, vanguard at 11:45am, parade at 12:15pm Friday; Broadway at Josephine through downtown to Martin at Santa Rosa, San Antonio. Fiesta Flambeau Night Parade Marching and equestrian units, organizations, the University of Texas Longhorn Band and many more come together for one of the nation’s largest illuminated parades. Celebrating its 66th year, the Flambeau features Grand Marshals “The Most Interesting Man in the World” and the Van de Putte family and the theme “A Time to Remember.” $12-$25, 7:15-11pm Saturday; Broadway at Grayson to Santa Rosa at Martin, following Broadway, N Alamo,

Commerce and Santa Rosa, San Antonio, (210) 3645349. Fiesta Cornyation Billed as the “raunchiest, cheapest event of Fiesta,” Cornyation spoofs current events, local politics and pop culture and this year welcomes guests into The Court of Festive Fêtes and Frivolous Faux Pas, to be ruled by King and Queen Anchovy Steve and Jody Newman. $15-$30, 7:30pm & 10pm WednesdayThursday; Charline McCombs Empire Theatre, 226 N St. Mary’s, San Antonio, (210) 226-3333. Fiesta Palooza Held in memory of The Ultimate Warrior, this unofficial Fiesta thowdown features 28 rock bands on four stages and “anything-goes” wrestling/lucha libre battles between Justin Vain, Porky, Avier “The Latin God” Santana, Fantasm Guerrero, Tigre Mysterio and special guests Cowboy Bobby Garret, Madd Dogg Ken Johnson and Skunk. “Moshing” in the ring will be permitted and masks are encouraged. $10, 6pm Sunday, Cadillac Bar, 212 S Flores, San Antonio, (210) 223-5533. Fiesta Pooch Parade Festively dressed Fiesta fans of the two- and four-legged variety wind through the tree-lined streets of Alamo Heights in a (three-mile) tail-wagging route. $20-$30, costume contest at 8:15am, walk at 9:15am Saturday; Alamo Heights Swimming Pool, 250 Viesca, San Antonio, (210) 614-6734.

GHOST DOG facebook.com/AlamoNewBraunfels facebook.com/AlamoNewBraunfels April 24th @ Park North twitter.com/AlamoNB In Jersey City, an African-American twitter.com/AlamoNB hit man follows “Hagakure: The Way of the Samurai.” Can he stay true to his code? And if he does, what is his fate? Afternoon Tea:

NICHOLAS NICKLEBY

April 27th @ Park North NICHOLAS NICKLEBY is a rich dish of cinema, and we’ll be enhancing its flavor with our tea and treat service at this screening. Orphans welcome! Video Vortex:

TURKISH CAPTAIN AMERICA

April 27th @ Westlakes Why do people keep making movies about Marvel superheroes when the best one already exists?

"One of the 10 Best Theaters in the World" - CNN International Interested in our party packages? Please visit drafthouse.com/venue_rental/ san_antonio facebook.com/SAdrafthouse twitter.com/SA_Drafthouse

BEST THEATER IN SA! » TIX & MORE: DRAFTHOUSE.COM » ALL SHOWS 18 & UP / Baby Day is Tues » HOST YOUR NEXT PRIVATE EVENT » CALL VENUE RENTAL @ 210-547-3668

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014• CURRENT 173


A special week of amazing events dedicated to celebrating beer and the community that enjoys it!

174  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014• CURRENT 175


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TEXAS REPTILE EXPOS: 501-562-7311 | texasreptiles.com 176  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


Go to sacurrent.com/calendar for even more events MON

28

Audacity

Sometimes it’s best to start a garage band before you know how to play your instrument. Songs come out more fluidly, with less of a self-conscious editing process, most likely ’cause you don’t know any better. The Black Lips did it in Atlanta, the Arctic Monkeys did it in England and the Ramones trashed around flawlessly in NYC. Together since their days in junior high, Fullerton, Calif.’s Audacity sounds like a band that learned to play shortly after they came up with a band name. The songs on their third release Butterknife sound like effortless, sun-kissed garage rock from dudes who’ve known each other since the days of braces and oppressive acne. Playing tight, feeling loose and representing the best of golden state garage rock, it’s Milo Goes to College in the 21st century. With the Rich Hands, Dark Planes and Junkie. $5, 9pm, Limelight, 2718 N St. Marys, (210) 735-7775, thelimelightsa.com. —Matt Stieb

Wednesday, April 23

Friday, April 25

8th Annual Siesta Fest featuring Cypress Hill. GJ Sutton

8th Annual Siesta Fest Bring your cowbells, Blue Oyster

CONCERTS

State Parking Lot #2, 5-11pm

Artery Across the Nation Tour featuring Upon This Dawning. The Korova, 6pm

Dance Gavin Dance with Capture the Crown, Palisades,

Bleach Blonde and Alive In The Lights. The White Rabbit, 5pm Lonely Horse The SA duo kicks off their “last DIY tour” with Tides, Donella Drive and Jonah Vin. Hi-Tones, 8pm Noel McKay and Brennen Leigh Gruene Hall, 6-10pm Ruben V Aztec Theatre, 8pm

Cult are here to close out Siesta Fest. GJ Sutton State Parking Lot #2, 5-11pm Almost Patsy Cline Band Luckenbach Dance Hall, 8-11:30pm Apache 65 The Mix, 10pm Broseph The Phoenix Saloon, 5-7pm Chris Young Cowboys Dancehall, 7pm Cure for the Radio Jack’s Bar, 8pm

Wednesday Night Picker’s Circle with T-Roy and Candace Miller Luckenbach Dance Hall, 5pm CLUBS/VENUES

Mr. Composition CD Release Kevin Prince, aka Mr.

San Antonio Food Bank features the Dirty River Boys. The concert is free, though attendees are asked to make a food or monetary donation. County Line, 6:30-10pm BYOV (DJ) Bring Your Own Vinyl, Hi-Tones, 9pm DJ PAK-MAN/DJ MV (DJ) Tucker’s Kozy Korner, 9pm Karaoke Wednesdays (Karaoke) Zombies, 9pm-2am Maya Guirao Project (Fusion) Luna, 9:30pm

Thursday, April 24 CONCERTS

8th Annual Siesta Fest featuring Puddle of Mudd and

Wayne Static. GJ Sutton State Parking Lot #2, 5-11pm

Ashes of Babylon Jack’s Bar, 11pm Cage The Elephant The White Rabbit, 7pm Dead the Poets The Falls, 9pm King Pelican The Cove, 8:30-11pm Matt The Cat Trio Gruene Hall, 6-10pm Merchants of Jazz Franco’s Italian Restaurant & Lounge/

Saloon, 9pm

Composition, releases his latest LP Graffiti the Mind. Fitzgerald’s Bar & Live Music, 9pm Ray Wylie Hubbard Gruene Hall, 8pm Rhythm and Rose Fiasco Cocktails, 8pm Riff House Review featuring Matt Adler, Ali Holder, Ben Balmer and The Vantage. Sam’s Burger Joint, 7pmmidnight Ruby Dee and the Snakehandlers Floore’s Country Store, 9pm Scott Shelby Moses Rose’s Hideout, 4pm Seek Irony Josabi’s, 8pm SIIINES 502 Bar, 9pm SKYROCKET! Aztec Theatre, 10:30pm Small Town Habit Thirsty Horse Saloon, 10pm-midnight The Dead Barons The Mix, 9pm The Jazz Protagonists Boardwalk Bistro, 7pm The Lavens The Cove, 9-11:30pm The Vantage, Ben Balmer, Ali Holder Sam’s Burger Joint, 8pm

Naples Pizza, 8pm

CLUBS/VENUES

8:30pm

Step Aside (Blues) Hurricane Grill & Wings, 8pm The After Midnight Blues Band (Blues) Gustav’s

Nick Lawrence Thirsty Horse Saloon, 10pm Ready Revolution Aztec Theatre, 10:30pm Seth James & Bobby Mack Sam’s Burger Joint, The Leftovers The Phoenix Saloon, 5-7pm CLUBS/VENUES

DJ Agosto Cuellar (DJ) Hi-Tones, 9pm DV8 (Rock/Pop) Stonewerks Big Rock Grille at the Vineyard, 9pm

Korey and Dana (Rock/Pop) Stonewerks Big Rock Grille at the Rim, 9pm

Step Aside (Blues) Bar Louie, 9pm

SPRING FLING scooter ride

“COME SCOOT WITH US” AT 10AM ON SUNDAY, MAY 4TH AT THE MOTORCYCLE SHOP FOR A 50 MILE RIDE AROUND TOWN. THERE WILL BE FOOD, SCOOTER GAMES & A RAFFLE! THIS RIDE IS OPEN TO ANY SCOOTER FROM VINTAGE TO MODERN, 50CC-700CC.

CONCERTS

Horns2Halos, Scissorjack, Method of Inception, Broken Soul Zombies, 9:30pm Martin and Lewis Luckenbach Dance Hall, 4pm Lucas Taylor’s Mothership Connection The Phoenix

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Woodlawn Theatre Presents

April 11 May 11

Black Thunder (Rock/Pop) Broadway 5050 Colonnade, 9pm

Garden, 6:30pm

White Tapes (Rock/Pop) Speedway Sports Bar #1, 9pm Saturday, April 26 CONCERTS

A Tribute to Deer Vibes SA baroque pop orchestra Deer

Vibes will not be performing at this show, but members of Deer Vibes will be playing in their solo projects covering DV tunes. Featuring The Freebies, Of the Lion, Crown and Mikey Vibe. Limelight, 9pm

Use coupon code CURRENTME for $2 off an adult

WoodlawnTheatre.org (210) 267-8388

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INSIDE sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014• CURRENT 179


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CURRENT EVENTS Brandon’s Revue featuring Carrie Elkin. Cibolo Nature Center, 6:30-11pm

Presents Pr P rreeesseen nttss nts n Premiering Friday, April 25th at Palladium IMAX , Silverado 16, Embassy 14, Rialto, Mayan Palace, & Northwest ®

Charlie Robison & Dan Dyer Luckenbach Dance Hall, 9pm Drowning Mona The Falls, 9pm Flat Top Jones Gruene Hall, 1-5pm Jay Eric & the Bleiders Creek Thirsty Horse Saloon, 10pm Josh Abbott Band, Green River Ordinance, The Wind & The Wave Floore’s Country Store, 9pm Maeta Jack’s Bar, 11pm Michael Hardie Moses Rose’s Hideout, 3pm Off Da Chain The Cove, 9-11:30pm Rick Sanford Band & Judge Metal The Phoenix Saloon, 8pm-1am

Stoney LaRue Gruene Hall, 9pm The Velcro Pygmies The Falls, 9pm Top Heavy The Cove, 6:30-8:30pm Weldon Hanson Luckenbach Dance Hall, 1-5pm

After discovering her boyfriend is married, Carly (Cameron Diaz) soon meets the wife he’s been cheating on. And when yet another affair is discovered, all three women team up to plot mutual revenge on the three-timing SOB.

CLUBS/VENUES

Barefoot (Acoustic) Stonewerks Big Rock Grille at the Vineyard, 9pm

ShowINg At thE PAllADIuM IMAX , EMbASSy & bIjou

Brittany Shane (Americana) Branch on High, 2pm Ron Young & Scott Gale (Rock/Pop) Central Market, noon-3pm

Sunday School with Ghost Pizza (DJ) Hi-Tones, 9pm Sunset Sessions (DJ) Southtown 101, 6pm The Better Halves (Acoustic) Bending Branch Winery, 2pm Monday, April 28 CONCERTS

Audacity, Rich Hands, Dark Planes and Junkie Limelight, 9p

Bo Porter Gruene Hall, 6pm Swing Ngiht with The Rollfast Ramblers Sam’s Burger Joint, 8:30pm

CLUBS/VENUES

King William Fair After Party (Rock/Pop) Beethoven

Meat & Metal Mondays (Metal) Zombies, 9pm Small World Jazz (Jazz) Join the players in a jam or simply

Halle und Garten, 1pm

Medina Moonshine Band (Country) Sunset Cocktail Club, 8pm

Richard Vidmer (Americana) Branch on High, 2pm CONCERTS

Tucked away in an estate outside of London, Professor Coupland along with a team of university students conduct an “experiment” on Jane Harper, a young girl who harbors unspeakable secrets. What dark forces they uncover are more terrifying than any of them expected.

CLUBS/VENUES

Ezzencia Musical Band (Variety) 210 Ceviche, 8pm-

Sunday, April 27

An undercover cop Damien Collier (Paul Walker) tries to take down a ruthless crime lord with access to a neutron bomb by infiltrating his gang.

Luckenbach Dance Hall, 5pm

Jim Cullum and Friends (Jazz) Tucker’s Kozy Korner,

midnight

See it in D-BOX!

Southern Austin Moonlighters Gruene Hall, 5-9pm Sunday Evening Picker’s Circle with Bill Lewis

Allan Haynes & Ezra Charles Sam’s Burger Joint, 12:30pm Ashley Rose The Cove, 1-3pm Felix Truvere & the Open Road The Falls, 10pm Fiesta Blues Heritage featuring Austin’s Lauren Silva, Ezra Charles Band and Alan Haynes. Sam’s Burger Joint, 12:30pm James Pardo The Phoenix Saloon, 3-6pm Jason Eady & Jamie Wilson and Friends Luckenbach Dance Hall, 1-5pm San Jose Mission Fest featuring Gibby Escobedo, Jimmy Edwards & The Original Old School Breed, with Roberto Pulido, Ram Herrera, David Lee Garza & Max Baca, 2010 Grammy Award Winners Los TexManiacs with Rick Trevino and Augie Meyers, 2014 Grammy winners La Santa Cecilia, Del Castillo, Bombasta, Amanda Cevallos and the High Hands. Mission San Jose, 11am-11pm Slim Bawb Gruene Hall, 12:30-4:30pm

7-10pm

enjoy the versatility of this jazz outfit. Olmos Bharmacy, 7-10pm

Tuesday, April 29 CONCERTS

Indie Jazz Nite Featuring music from Tony Romero’s Spiders and Formative Fire. 502 Bar, 9pm

Midtown Jazz Sound Tucker’s Kozy Korner Night Beats, Cosmonauts, Dahga Bloom, Creatura, The Oblios Based out of Seattle, Wash., Night Beats’ surf-

psych sound harks back to the area’s heyday as a garage capital. Their newest release, Sonic Bloom, was released on The Black Angels’ Reverberation Appreciation Society record label. Limelight, 8pm

Tuesday Night Picker’s Circle with Ben Beckendorf Luckenbach Dance Hall, 5pm

Tuesday Night Song Swap Mark Juungers with Susan Gibson and Adam Caroll, Gruene Hall, 6-10pm

Villela The Mix, 11pm CLUBS/VENUES

Neon Love with DJ Pulp and Adam Madrigal (DJ) Hi-Tones, 9pm

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Based on his best-selling memoir, the film tells the extraordinary and epic true story of Eric Lomax (Colin Firth), former British Army POW, and his new wife (Nicole Kidman) as they go in search of the Japanese interpreter who tortured him.

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My brother is 22 years old and mentally ill with social anxiety on the scale of agoraphobia (officially diagnosed). He’s made significant progress in the past few years, but he’s stuck on the fact that he’s a virgin and is convinced that he’s not going to make any real social progress until that’s no longer a fact. His particular problem makes it impossible to reason with him—he’s a little Asperger’s-y—and he is convinced that he will only be able to pursue a job, have a social life and tackle other obstacles after he loses his virginity. Financially, it would be easy for me to drive him to Nevada and eliminate the virginity issue. He’s asked our mom to do so. My family isn’t hung up on “purity” where sex and virginity are concerned, so we’re open to this. I don’t have any illusions that this will solve his problems, but my mom and I are hopeful that it would eliminate an excuse that’s keeping him from taking positive steps forward. Should I offer to take him? Or force him to sort it out on his own despite his crippling social issues? –Socially Interactive Sister “I want to commend SIS for considering the services of a sex worker in such a positive and nonjudgmental way,” said Siouxsie Q, a San Francisco–based sex worker and the creator and host of The WhoreCast, a weekly podcast that seeks to humanize people working in the sex industry. “And I want to reassure her that the right provider is out there for her brother.” Some will object to your hiring a sex worker to help your brother out, of course, but you can tell those people to go fuck themselves—or you can tell them to rent The Sessions. In that acclaimed 2012 film, John Hawkes played a poet who is paralyzed from the neck down. Helen Hunt played a sexual surrogate—a clinical/glorified sex worker—that the poet, with the blessing of his priest, hires to take his virginity. No one had a problem with the sex-work aspect of The Sessions

because Hawkes’s character is so profoundly and obviously disabled that audiences sympathized with his plight: It would be difficult, if not impossible, for him to get laid any other way. While Hawkes’ disability in The Sessions was immediately apparent, SIS, your brother’s disability is no less real for being invisible. So I don’t see why anyone should object to your brother getting a little professional assistance with his plight. So hire a sex worker for your brother, SIS, if you think it will help—even if it just eliminates an excuse that’s blocking his progress—and there’s no need to drive to Nevada. Siouxsie suggests you look for an “experienced” (read: somewhat older) escort with an online presence in your area. A sex worker who’s over 25 or 30 and maintains her own website—and has write-ups on escort review sites—is not just far less likely to be trafficked or exploited, she’s far more likely to be experienced and patient. She may have even worked with men like your brother before. “A friend had a client who used her services to ‘practice’ dating,” Siouxsie said. “Over time, the client gained enough confidence to start dating. I hope SIS’s brother has a wonderful experience, and that boosts his confidence and helps him move forward in his life, too.” So what do you do once you locate a prospective sex worker in you area? “Send an e-mail explaining the situation and your brother’s special needs,” said Siouxsie. “There are sex workers out there who specialize in working with clients with disabilities, and many have experience working with clients who might be very similar to her brother,” and with a little searching, you should be able to find one. If the first woman you contact doesn’t work with men like your brother, she may be able to refer you to someone who does. Once you find your local Helen Hunt, SIS, prep your brother for the experience. “Give him a pep talk,” said Siouxsie. “Let him know about etiquette and protocol: no haggling, no prying for personal information, his personal hygiene needs to be impeccable and he should know the basics on protection and STI transmission. Above all, he needs to treat her with respect.”

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FREE WILL ASTROLOGY by Rob Brezsny ARIES (March 21-April 19): If for some inexplicable reason you are not simmering with new ideas about how you could drum up more money, I don’t know what to tell you -- except that maybe your mother lied to you about exactly when you were born. The astrological omens are virtually unequivocal: If you are a true Aries, you are now being invited, teased and even tugged to increase your cash flow and bolster your financial know-how. If you can’t ferret out at least one opportunity to get richer quicker, you might really be a Pisces or Taurus. And my name is Jay Z.

time to gather clues on how best to accomplish all that good stuff. To get you started in your quest, here’s advice from Dale Carnegie: “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Does Jamaican sprinter Usain Bolt run faster than any person alive? As far as we know, yes. He holds three world records and has won six Olympic gold medals. Even when he’s a bit off his game, he’s the best. At the 2008 Beijing Summer Olympics, he set the all-time mark for the 100-meter race—9.69 seconds—despite the fact that one of his shoelaces was untied and he slowed down to celebrate before reaching the finish line. Like you, Bolt is a Leo. I’m making him both your role model and your anti-role model for the foreseeable future. You have the power to achieve something approaching his levels of excellence in your own field -- especially if you double-check to make sure your shoelace is never untied and especially if you don’t celebrate victory before it’s won.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): You remind me of a garden plot that has recently been plowed and rained on. Now the sun is out. The air is warm. Your dirt is wet and fertile. The feeling is a bit unsettled because the stuff that was below ground got churned up to the top. Instead of a flat surface, you’ve got furrows. But the overall mood is expectant. Blithe magic is in the air. Soon it will be time to grow new life. Oh, but just one thing is missing: The seeds have yet to be sewn. That’s going to happen very soon. Right? GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Here’s an excerpt from “Celestial Music,” a poem by Louise Gluck: “I’m like the child who buries / her head in the pillow / so as not to see, the child who tells herself / that light causes sadness.” One of your main assignments in the coming weeks, Gemini, is not to be like that child. It’s true that gazing at what the light reveals may shatter an illusion or two, but the illumination you will be blessed with will ultimately be more valuable than gold.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): In his unpublished book The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, John Koenig coins new words that convey experiences our language has not previously accounted for. One that may apply to you sometime soon is “trumspringa,” which he defines as “the temptation to step off your career track and become a shepherd in the mountains, following your flock between pastures with a sheepdog and a rifle, watching storms at dusk from the doorway of a small cabin.” To be overtaken by trumspringa doesn’t necessarily mean you will literally run away and be a shepherd. In fact, giving yourself the luxury of considering such wild possibilities may be a healing release that allows you to be at peace with the life you are actually living.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Would you like to forge new alliances and expand your web of connections and get more of the support you need to fulfill your dreams? You are entering the Season of Networking, so now would indeed be an excellent

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “The supreme pleasure we can know, Freud said, and the model for all pleasure, orgasmic pleasure, comes when an excess tension built up, confined, compacted, is abruptly released.” That’s an observation by philosopher Alphonso Lingis. I bring it to your attention, Libra, because I expect that you will soon be able to harvest a psychospiritual version of that supreme pleasure. You have been gathering and storing up raw materials for soul-making, and now the time has come to express them with a creative splash. Are you ready to purge your emotional backlog? Are you brave enough to go in search of cathartic epiphanies? What has been dark will yield light.

astrological data might sound eccentric, even weird. But you know what? Sometimes life is -- or at least should be -- downright unpredictable. After much meditation, I’ve concluded that the most important message you can send to the universe is to fly a pair of underpants from the top of a flagpole. You heard me. Take down the flag that’s up there, and run the skivvies right up to the top. Whose underpants should you use? Those belonging to someone you adore, of course. And what is the deeper meaning behind this apparently irrational act? What exactly is life asking from you? Just this: Stop making so much sense all the time -- especially when it comes to cultivating your love and expressing your passion.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The potential turning points that might possibly erupt in the coming days will not become actual turning points unless you work hard to activate them. They will be subtle and brief, so you will have to be very alert to notice them at all, and you will have to move quickly before they fade away. Here’s another complication: These incipient turning points probably won’t resemble any turning points you’ve seen before. They may come in the form of a lucky accident, a blessed mistake, a happy breakdown, a strange healing, a wicked gift or a perfect weakness.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): You need to take some time out to explore the deeper mysteries of snuggling, cuddling and nuzzling. In my opinion, that is your sacred duty. It’s your raison d’etre, your ne plus ultra, your sine qua non. You’ve got to nurture your somatic wisdom with what we in the consciousness industry refer to as yummy warm fuzzy wonder love. At the very least, you should engage in some prolonged hugging with a creature you feel close to. Tender physical touch isn’t just a luxury; it’s a necessity.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): If you happen to be an athlete, the coming week will not be a good time to headbutt a referee or take performance-enhancing drugs. If you hate to drive your car anywhere but in the fast lane, you will be wise to try the slower lanes for a while. If you are habitually inclined to skip steps, take short cuts and look for loopholes, I advise you to instead try being thorough, methodical and by-the-book. Catch my drift? In this phase of your astrological cycle, you will have a better chance at producing successful results if you are more prudent than usual. What?! A careful, discreet, strategic, judicious Sagittarius? Sure! Why not? CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): My interpretation of this week’s

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Your body contains about four octillion atoms. That’s four with 27 zeroes after it. Believe it or not, 200 billion of that total were once inside the body of Martin Luther King, Jr. For that matter, an average of 200 billion atoms of everyone who has ever lived and died is part of you. I am not making this up. (See the mathematical analysis here: http:// tinyurl.com/AtomsFromEveryone.) As far as your immediate future is concerned, Pisces, I’m particularly interested in that legacy from King. If any of his skills as a great communicator are alive within you, you will be smart to call on them. Now is a time for you to express high-minded truths in ways that heal schisms, bridge gaps and promote unity. Just proceed on the assumption that it is your job to express the truth with extra clarity, candor and grace.

JONESIN’ CROSSWORD by Matt Jones “Ron For Your Lives!”--that’s all you can do.

Answer on page 173. ©2014 Jonesin’ Crosswords editor@jonesincrosswords.com.

Across

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49 Volcano that erupted in 2002 51 Al and Peggy Bundy’s son 52 “Srsly?!” 53 Wine that can’t decide what it is (from a stand-up comedian and a fictional newsman)? 58 Video game starting point 59 ___ car (child’s ride) 62 Compass dir. 63 Advanced 64 Interlock 65 The Mavericks, on scoreboards 66 ‘90s Mariners star

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†Massage not offered at Walzem Rd. location. †License Number MS1035 – 707 SW Military Dr., San Antonio, Instructor supervised student salons & massage spas. TX 78221 and 6804 Ingram Rd., San Antonio, TX 78238. For more information about our graduation rates, median loan debt of students who completed the program and other important information, please visit our website.

STATEWIDE APPEAL CALL CENTER REPRESENTATIVES • FLEXIBLE HOURS

• GREAT WORK ATMOSPHERE • SET HOURLY WAGE PLUS BONUS PAY

NEW LOCATION HIRING IMMEDIATELY CALL 210.424.6577 APPLY IN PERSON: 12746 CIMARRON PATH, STE 130 (IH 10 AND DE ZAVALA) EMAIL RESUme TO: jobsatswa@GMAIL.COM

sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 187


DRIVERS NEEDED J & M Tank Lines, Inc. needs PROFESSIONAL DRIVERS! $1000 SIGN-ON BONUS. Must have 2 yrs verifiable tractor/trailer experience and 1 year minimum well experience. $500 REFERRAL BONUS and $600/wk GUARANTEE PAY.

— CONTACT —

Denise Frye at 800-456-8265 OR APPLY ONLINE AT JMTANK.COM

MONEY FOR SCHOOL Potentially get full tuition and a great career with Paid Training, Full Medical and Dental, Vacation. Hs Grads Ages 17-34. Call Mon-Fri, 8AM-4PM 1-877-669-6289

CALL 1-877 NOW NAVY

Email: jobs_sanantonio@navy.mil 188  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


CARE FOR THOSE WHO’VE CARED FOR YOU! LifeSpan Home Health provides qualified and attentive caregivers, nurses, and physical therapists to assist you or your loved one with the many daily activities that become more difficult with age or disability. We are devoted to meeting all of your needs, so that you or your loved one can stay at home, in the community, and in your life.

ENTRY LEVEL PART TIME SALES

The cost of services may be covered for those who qualify! Call us to determine if you are eligible: 877.434.3153

Outgoing, confident personalities needed

Hourly pay plus great sales bonuses! Sales Positions = up to $25 per hour

Apply in person at 329 Alamo Plaza

REQUIREMENTS: NOW HIRING

SALES CLERK FOR THE THRIFT SHOP.

Sales Clerk Hours: Tues.-Sat.:9:30am-5:45pm with some holidays.

• Be able to speak fluently in spanish; • Have some retail experience; • Be able to pass a criminal history check; • Be able to pass a drug screening; • Have a clear and clean driving record (no DUIs) • Be able to lift heavy objects.

MUST PASS FBI BACKGROUND CHECK, DRUG SCREENING, & HAVE CLEAN DRIVING RECORD.

Apply in Person: Monday-Friday between 9am-6pm • 3103 West Ave. San Antonio, TX 78213 • 210-340-8077

JOIN A TEAM THAT CHANGES LIVES! MAKE A DIFFERENCE!

We are always looking for compassionate caregivers, dedicated RNs, physical therapists, and other qualified clinical staff. We are also hiring for general office staff throughout the year. apply online – lifespantx.com

877.434.3153

OPPORTUNITY KNOCKS IMMEDIATE OPENINGS!

WORK PLAY

HARD HARD CURRENT IS HIRING: MULTI-MEDIA SALES: INSIDE SALES:

Customized print, digital & event marketing for local clients.

Specialize in industries, including employment, real estate & events.

Send your creative cover letter & resume with subject line: Media Sales - or - Phone Sales Lara Fischer, Advertising Director : lfischer@sacurrent.com

Banquet Server (on-call) Banquet House Person Bartender Bell Person Cocktail Server Estheticians - Spa Host/Hostess Housekeeping House Person Housekeeping Supervisor Line Cook Maintenance Technician

Massage Therapist Mercato Café Attendant Mercato Café Supervisor Nail Technicians Pool Bartenders Pool Food & Beverage Server Public Area Attendant Room Attendant Room Service Server Server AM Server PM

If you are interested but unable to come in person, OR IF YOU JUST WANT TO EXPEDITE THE APPLICATION PROCESS, please visit our website at www.eilanhotel.com to apply online. Sage Hospitality proud to be an EEO/AA employer M/F/D/V. We maintain a drug-free workplace and perform pre-employment substance abuse testing and criminal background checks.

17103 La Cantera Parkway, San Antonio, TX 78256 • (210) 598-2900 sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 189


SARESEARCH.COM Call Clinical Trials of Texas, Inc. today at 210.949.0122 or apply online at SARESEARCH.COM 190  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


We need people with the following conditions to participate in research studies:

CHRONIC CONSTIPATION CONSTIPATION CAUSED BY PRESCRIPTION PAIN MEDICATION NIGHTTIME URINATION TYPE 2 DIABETES STARTING SOON: OSTEOARTHRITIS OF THE KNEE

CHECK OUT FRESH DAILY CONTENT AT BLOGS.SACURRENT.COM

CONTACT US TO SEE IF YOU QUALIFY

(210)824-5678

GO TO OUR WEBSITE FOR ONLINE SCREENING FORMS & CHAT LIVE WITH OUR STAFF

QUALITYRESEARCHINC.COM

COMPENSATION FOR TIME & TRAVEL IS AVAILABLE sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 191


Volunteers Needed for Diabetes Study If you are: • 18-75 years old • Are diagnosed with Type 2 Mellitus in past 2 years • Diet Controlled or taking Metformin alone You may qualify to participate in a study to test a novel combination of anti-diabetic drugs on glucose control. If you participate, you will receive: • Physical exam • Medications for up to 3 years • Glucose Meter • Blood work • Compensation for your time

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VOLUNTEERS NEEDED FOR RESEARCH STUDY ON HUMAN METABOLISM TO BE CONDUCTED BY THE UNIVERSITY OF TEXAS HEALTH SCIENCE CENTER

IF YOU ARE:

• Between 18 and 65 years old • With or Without Diabetes

You may qualify for this study that will evaluate how a probiotic (a type of good bacteria) affects metabolism

IF YOU PARTICIPATE, YOU WILL RECEIVE: For more information, contact: 210-358-7200 Principal Investigator: Ralph DeFronzo, MD Department of Medicine, Diabetes Division, UTHSCSA Study to be conducted at the Texas Diabetes Institute 192  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com

• Blood work • A physical exam • Compensation for your time

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Don’t just dream about becoming a HOMEOWNER,

make it happen!

I’VE GOT THE KEYS TO YOUR NEW PLACE. CYNTHIA GOMEZ, REALTOR 210-254-0503 • CYNTHIA@TEXANLEGACY.COM WWW.TEXANLEGACY.COM TEXAN LEGACY GROUP, FATHOM REALTY

Let’s MAKE IT HAPPEN together! 210-854-5630 CrystalEdwardsHomes@gmail.com

FREE APARTMENT SEARCH

• Lofts starting at $499 • Townhomes starting at $519 • Wood/Stain Concrete Floors • Big Dogs? • Immediate Move-Ins • Bad Credit Ok • Downtown Housing Specialist • 100’s of Unadvertised Specials • Some Bills Paid • Preferred Employee/Military/ Student Discounts

CRYSTAL EDWARDS

Apartments CENTRALLY LOCATED • 2 & 3 BEDROOMS AVAILABLE • PRIVATE BALCONIES • FAMILY ORIENTED COMMUNITY • LARGE FLOOR PLANS CALL FOR MORE INFO 210.344.6714

$50 for Your Referrals!

Call 366-APTS (2787)

2 & 3 BDR AVAIL 2 bdr $675 1100 sq ft, 3 bdr $875 1250 sq ft. covered parking, bbq area 410 @ San Pedro Port Royale Apartments (210)344.6714

Moving? And have stuff to sell? Place an ad in the San Antonio Current's Marketplace 227-2527 www.sacurrent.com

Open 24/7 Place Your Ad anytime day or night!!! www.sacurrent.com

7863 Callaghan Road Suite 204 (Across from Chacho’s)

RENTALLSA.com sacurrent.com • April 23-29, 2014 • CURRENT 193


NEED MONEY NOW? WE WANT TO MAKE YOU A LOAN TODAY! $40.00 up to $1300 Today! 30 Minute Service *Noble Finance 210.921.0971 * Surety Finance 210.733.6136 * Loan Express 210.932.1230 *

WORK

DRAMATIC WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM 15/20 lbs monthly (before exercise) A personalized weekly, medically supervised program using oral medications and weekly lipotropic injections. $140/month LOSE WEIGHT, NO WAIT! Call or Text for Appointment: 210-995-3681

HARD

PLAY

HARD

san antonio

Online at sacurrent.com REMIX HAIR STUDIO Full Service Hair Salon Spring Specials: Women's Haircut $25, Shellac mani & pedi combo $50, Eyebrow wax, basic mani, & eyelash extentsions $50 1106 W. Hildebrand | 210-267-8916

WE PAY CA$H FOR USED VIDEO GAMES! 410 @ San Pedro 210-366-4263 GameOverVideoGames.com

GET MARRIED AT MIDNIGHT! Or any other time you'd like. Female minister will perform your ceremony any time day or night. Reasonable rates Complimentary Consultation (210) 901-9337 LOW ENERGY? POOR SEX DRIVE? WEIGHT GAIN? NOT FEELING YOURSELF? Testosterone Replacement Therapy $150 initial visit $100 per month includes monthly visit and lab work Call or Text for Appointment: 210-995-3681

CURRENT IS HIRING: MULTI-MEDIA SALES: INSIDE SALES:

Customized print, digital Specialize in industries, & event marketing for including employment, local clients. real estate & events.

Send your creative cover letter & resume with subject line: Media Sales - or - Phone Sales Lara Fischer, Advertising Director : lfischer@sacurrent.com

Glenn A. Payne Attorney at Law

All Criminal Cases Handled SA’S ONLY 100% VEGAN & GLUTEN FREE RESTAURANT

NOW SERVING BREAKFAST! MON-FRI: 8 – 11A | LUNCH AND DINNER: 11A-8:30P SATURDAY BRUNCH BUFFET: 11A-3:30P | FARM TO TABLE DINNER: SAT. 4:30-8:30P

8407 BROADWAY • 210-826-4223 • MYVEGERIA.COM

Criminal Motions Tickets to Revoke Law

Bonds

Let me help you. 24 Hour Service Available

210.227.2963 • 210.22PAYNE • glennpaynelaw@gmail.com 194  CURRENT • April 23-29, 2014 • sacurrent.com


AN AMAZING CITY DESERVES THE BEST ATTORNEY DOWNLOAD THE DWI DUDE APP TODAY! Or save 210.394.3833

under “DUDE” in your phone!

HEY CURRENT READERS!

The Law Office of

Jamie Balagia, P.C.

Come to the Dude’s office daily during business hours and show us that you have the DUDE saved on your phone to receive your 2014 DWI DUDE Fiesta Medal!

313 S. Main • Across from Courthouse

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111 NW LOOP 410 - 210. 344. 6601

2731 NW LOOP 410 - 210. 340. 1289


Š2013 Anheuser-Busch, Select Light Beer, St. Louis, MO 99 calories, 3.1g carbs, 0.7g protein and 0.0g fat, per 12 oz.


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