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The All-New D-MAX has landed at
A close encounter with the All-New Isuzu D-MAX brings to light a new generation of reliability and down-to-earth fuel economy teamed with off-the-planet levels of performance, safety and comfort across the entire range. Intelligently engineered with Isuzu’s tough Spirit of Truck heritage – you can truly depend on it. Make contact and test drive the All-New Isuzu D-MAX today.
View the range
www.iute.com.au D/L1721
304-308 Scarborough Beach Rd, Osborne Park
071012-96
(08) 9273 2000 A/H - Keith Skinner 0419 999 180 Rick Paindelli 0439 454 870
The All-New 2012 Isuzu D-MAX Showroom When we were developing the All-New Isuzu D-MAX, we looked at the single, most important thing drivers want from their vehicle - to ‘Depend on it’. In other words, the reliability, versatility and capability to take on any challenge and take you anywhere. No manufacturer is better placed to deliver this than us. Because the All-New Isuzu D-MAX brings together two great automotive traditions – the flexibility of the Aussie ute and the build quality of Isuzu’s Spirit of Truck.
4x4 LS-U Crew Cab Ute From
$48,990*
4x4 LS-M Crew Cab Ute From
$46,956*
4x4 SX Crew Cab Ute From
$45,330*
4x4 SX Crew Cab Chassis
$46, 570*
From
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From
$35,400
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From
$30,611*
DRIVE AWAY
With a high-power, fuel-efficient 3-litre turbo diesel engine and super-strong ladder chassis, the Isuzu D-MAX takes sharp inclines and heavy loads in its stride. It also has more safety features as standard than ever before, including dual front, side & curtain airbags, an Anti-lock Brake System and Electronic Brakeforce Distribution. There’s also the added reassurance of Electronic Stability Control and Traction Control systems, plus Brake Assist to help you stop more quickly and safely in an emergency – all these are standard across the range.
REGENTS R EGENTS S
9273 9 273 2000 2000
071012-96
To create a D-MAX that meets your exact needs without compromise, we’ve developed 12 different models across the range of 4x4 and 4x2. Some have more refinements and creature comforts, while others are big on load capacity and practicality. So, whether you want to take off on a weekend adventure or take on some tough jobs, now you can Depend on it with the A A/H Warre Wa Warren r n0 rre 0430 4 430 382 860 304-308 -308 -30 308 SCARBOROUGH S CAR SCAR A BOR BOROUG OUGH OUG widest-ever range from the All-New 304 Isuzu D-MAX. BEACH OSBORNE BEA EACH RD, EA RD, OSBOR RD BORNE BOR NE E PARK PARK D/L1721 ISUZUUTES.COM.AU ISU IS UZUU UTE TES.COM.AU
*All prices are for manual models, (add $2000 for automatic transmission). All prices for cab chassis models include Genuine Isuzu economy alloy tray. Price includes 12 months registration.
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4 Hocking Road, Kingsley WA 6026 P: 08 9309 4200 F: 08 9309 4255 E: info@allboatsandcaravans.com.au
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Spring chicken The Spring issue of Rock Candy magazine has taken us all by surprise - not because of the exclusive interview we nabbed in Hollywood with Colin Farrell, star of the Total Recall reboot, and not because of the chance I had to go all Jane-meets-Tarzan in South Africa’s Sun City. No, it’s because we’ve been overwhelmed by the enthusiasm our readers and advertisers have had for this, the third edition of the magazine. In the three months since the last mag hit the streets, Rock Candy has been featured in The West Australian, has strutted its stuff at product launches (thank you, Air New Zealand for the free return ticket - see early 2013 for the results of that trip to the Land of the Long White Cloud), and generally made a fair bit of noise in this beautiful city we like to call home, all of which has contributed to a noticeable groundswell in our magazine being the go-to title for the FIFO boys and girls. So what’s on the menu in this issue? Well, we’ve got Kara Harris’ take on the ultimate steak sandwich (tough leather versions need not apply), while Alan Crane puts Holden’s new Colorado through its paces. I spend some time with the new breed of rock star chefs (tatts and attitude to the max) while Adam Morris tells the amazing true story of Nigel Brennan, an Aussie who survived hundreds of days in captivity in the most hellish of circumstances in Somalia. If you fancy seeing how you’d fare in some pretty hair raising situations of your own, then read all about the Tough Mudder challenge - the world’s dirtiest, brownest, most awesome race - or buy a kayak and join in the fun in next year’s Avon Descent. We tell you about the chance to watch Katy Perry with the roar of the Singapore F1 in the background, climb all aboard the Vodka Train or hitch a ride on some of the most impressive sailing races in the world. Amber’s rounded up the best gadgets and fashion pics for the season, while if you’re quick you could join Perth’s great and the good at the glitziest charity event of the season - a fundraising night under the stars next to the river, where every cent goes to saving endangered animals. There are the usual features on fishing - I interviewed NZ TV star and confirmed marine loony, Matt Watson, as well as our gig guide and sports calendar and competitions with stuff for you to win. We’ve got new columnists too. Following our last edition’s feature on footy star Heath Black’s struggles with depression and anxiety, we’re proud to welcome Heath as an RC regular contributor. He’ll tackle a mental health subject in each issue, and Josh Hawes, our resident psych, will give his professional opinion on how it can be tackled. We’ve also got Heath Franklin as Chopper on board, questioning the need for so many health and safety rules on minesites, Debbie Russo, our newest rock chick recruit, is introduced to you all as the FIFO wife, while Rick Parish, Perth’s most passionate crusader against childhood cancer reveals why he loves this state too much in our new feature, Local Heroes. Finally we speak to Johnny Casino, a tattooist from Sydney who’s a master with the tattoo gun, and Fieldey aka Haylee Fieldes, the genius behind custom designed surfboards the like of which you’ve never seen except in your wildest dreams. So we’re quietly confident - hell, we’re loudly confident - that this is the best ever issue of RC. And I’m pretty sure you’ll agree. Gabi Mills
ne xt
Perth P.O. Box 444 Northbridge WA 6865 (t) (08) 9381 1295
MANAGING DIRECTOR Cornelius Curtin conny@candymedia.com.au EDITOR Gabi Mills gabi@candymedia.com.au CREATIVE DESIGN Barbara Bertoli design@candymedia.com.au PRODUCTION MANAGER Amber Carrier amber@candymedia.com.au ACCOUNT MANAGER Marc English marc@candymedia.com.au
CONTRIBUTORS Alan Crane Heath Franklin Kara Harris Ara Jansen Jude Jones Nicki Letts Jordan Liest Adam Morris Gill Pringle Debbie Russo PHOTOGRAPHERS Barbara Bertoli Trish Gallagher ADVERTISING ENQUIRIES sales@candymedia.com.au EDITORIAL ENQUIRIES editor@candymedia.com.au
In the Summer issue... Who’s won the ‘Show us yer tatts’ competiton... Your chance to win
a Fieldey custom designed surfboard worth over $1000 ... Read Soren Bowie’s new regular column - fresh from the US’s Cracked.com... 3, 2, 1, blast off - read all about
Virgin Galactic’s space programme... Isuzu’s DMAX - the verdict ... Killer tomatoes and rancid rhubarb - murderous foods to avoid ... Eastern promise - the treasures of the Middle East revealed ... and all the regulars - fishing, boating, Heath Black, FIFO Wife and more.
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PUBLISHED BY CANDY MEDIA (WA) PTY LTD
Read RC online at
issuu.com/rockcandymagazine
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rockcandy_mag
GENERAL ENQUIRIES info@candymedia.com.au
Rock Candy Magazine is published in Western Australia by Candy Media (WA) Pty Ltd and distributed free of charge to resource industry workers at various locations around Western Australia. All rights reserved. No material published in Rock Candy may be reproduced in whole or part without prior written authority. Views expressed in Rock Candy are not necessarily the views of the editor or publisher. Rock Candy takes no responsibility for the accuracy of information included or submitted content. © 2012 Candy Media.
contents Issue 03 - September 2012
71 - Heath’s Helpline
Cover Story
Overcoming anxiety and misdiagnosis
36 - Colin Farrell channels FIFO angst “You’re away from home for months on end, it plays havoc with your personal relationships…”
74 - Food
Best steak sangers
43
36
78 - Off the Hook Extreme reeling with Harry
Special Features
80 - Off the Hook
21 - Inside Story
84 - Local HeroES
Crazy Kiwi Matt Watson’s barmy life
Rick Parish wants your money to fight childhood cancer
Kidnapped in Angola – Nigel Brennan’s horrifying story of survival
Total Recall, rebooted - we talk remakes, sci-fi gadgets, who’s who as well as RC’s verdict on the new version
21
51
Singapore F1 Grand Prix plus Katy Perry
94 - Rock Chick
Online domination
Introducing the FIFO wife
Regulars It’ll be a win win situation for some of you
100 - Ink 59
18
Haylee Fieldes aka Fieldey
104 - the last word
You buy them, you happy sack
Shoes, singlets, shorts – getting ready for the sun
Heath Franklin’s Chopper Health and Safety rant
28
100
18 - Rising stars
46 - Gig Guide The best music around
59 – Travel
RC’s rock star chefs
28 - Motoring
48 - Reviews
62 – Sport
Drool over the HSV Malloo
32 - Motoring
The Holden Colorado reviewed
34 - Motoring
M’Mates are your mates if your car needs attention
Johnny Casino of the Illustrated Man
102 - Who’s this, then?
14 - Gadgets and Stuff
16 - FIFO (Fashion In, Fashion Out)
Glamorous animal fundraiser
88 - Events
43 - Gaming
12 - Competitions
86 - Events
Final Twilight installment preveiwed
51 - Travel
Catching the Vodka Train
54 - Travel
Jungle drums at Sun City
Yacht races galore
Descent into madness
64 – Team sport Muddy hell
68 – Sport calendar
Catch all the rugby, motorsport and cricket action
cover photo
40 - Cover Story
photo: courtesy of Sony Pictures graphic elaboration: Barbara Bertoli
12
play &
! win ! Cheeky Monkey competition WA’s newest micro-brewery and cider distillery, the Cheeky Monkey, have opened their doors in Margaret River, and to celebrate they’re giving one lucky winner the chance to enjoy a slap up meal for two with a glass of beer or cider each. There are five beers and two ciders to try on tap while munching on locally sourced grub prepared by the Cheeky’s kitchen. If this rings your bell, then just answer this simple question: Which state is the Margaret River region in? Is it: a) The Northern Territory; b) Western Australia; or c) Tasmania? Send your answer, plus contact details to competitions@candymedia.com.au by October 31. One lucky winner will receive a voucher for a meal and a drink at the Cheeky Monkey brewery.
TAPE DOWN YOUR WINDOWS, THE SUB HAS LANDED.
+ plus Amelia Park competition Enjoy a taste of this true blue West Aussie familyowned firm in a competition guaranteed to tick all the boxes if you’re a meat and fine wine lover. One lucky winner will receive an Amelia Park Wine twin pack, an Amelia Park Apron to deflect all those delicious meaty juices off your chinos, an Amelia Park Hat (you’re cooking, you need a hat), and a $50 Meat Voucher for Ryan’s Quality Meats. So to be in with a chance of winning answer this simple question: Where does Dan Masters cook steak? (Clue: turn to page 77) Is it: a) The Rockpool Bar and Grill; b) The Rock Candy Bar and Grill; or c) The Rickets Bar and Grill? Send your answer, plus contact details to competitions@candymedia.com.au by October 31. One lucky winner will receive the Amelia Park prize pack.
page 41
Win total recall prize packs
page 49
Win twilight tickets and gear
page 88
Your chance to go to F1 Singapore’s Grand Prix
page 102
Nab a unique fieldey surfboard
13
AVAILABLE AT
The ultimate Sound Lab Perth store launch is coming soon! Don't miss out on the party. Head to our website and sign up to our VIP List, or arrange for an in-home demonstration.
www.soundlab.net.au Tel. 1300 880 544
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Gadgets & stuff
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Walk In Beer Cooler No you haven’t died, but you have entered beer heaven. The the walk in beer cooler may seem the stuff of dreams but it’s real, we assure you. Perfect for storing a huge assortment of cases of beer, kegs, and it even includes a built in draft tap AU $6,349 www.kegworks.com
LaCuisine 18oz Tornado Portable Cocktail Mixer
If you fancy yourself as a 21st century Tom Cruise (from his Cocktail days, not the weirdy Scientologist guff, naturally), then you’ll need the right kit. Enter stage left LaCuisine’s Tornado portable cocktail mixer. It looks cool as, and makes the business of making a Slow Comfortable Screw against the Wall less trying. The leak proof lid and cap means that once the Tornado starts churning, you won’t cover yourself or your eager cocktail-yearning guests in liquor. Sorry Tom, but it’s the end of the hippy, hippy shake approach to cocktails as we know it. from AU $13.25 www.amazon.com
Company Kuchbi Inc. Updated 28 January 2012
Version 4.0.2 Size 8.5 MB
Price free
Here’s a handy app for anybody with a big hunger in an unfamiliar place. Fastfood tells you where you’ll find your nearest favourite junk food outlet, or if you’re craving something a bit classier, the nearest Thai, Italian, Chinese or Indian joint. It’s the perfect addition to your app collection when you’ve driven into Hicksville with no idea how to feed your face beyond a Mrs Mac’s pie from the servo.
15
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Bean Bag Pool Float Relax by the pool like never before with these giant bean bag pool floats. These enormous floating chairs are similar to the bean bags you had as a kid, but the inside is filled with thousands of special buoyant beads and the exterior fabric is mold, stain, and sun damage resistant. AU $249.99 www.thisiswhyimbroke.com
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Motorized Floating Bumper Cars Ram into each other bumper car style just like you used to do as a kid – only now you are crashing into each other on the high seas - well backyard pool at least. These floating motorized bumper cars are perfect for fun at the pool or beach, and include a built in large water gun. AU $99.90 www.amazon.com
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Nuforce Podio LuminAudio The Podio Luminadio is an ultra-compact MP3 player and speaker with a lighting system, perfect for cyclists. The bike handlebar mounting bracket included, is ideal for listening to music safely while bike riding. The device can also be used whilst camping, as a desktop speaker system, and while exercising (walking and running). AU $149.00 www.contractaudio.com www.surroundsounds.com.au
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Light Up Skateboard If you’re a skaterboi (or girl), and you fancy taking a spin after dark, then check out these bright babies. Lightweight and flexible, the illuminated longboards are infused with LEDs in blue, green and red version. Rad. AU $176.36 www.thisiswhyimbroke.com
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Fashion In Fashion Out
SINGLET
01
08
01
OneByOne 'Have You Seen Her' $49.95
Tee 02 03
Jeans West $29.99
SHORTS 04
OneByOne ‘Blank Canvas’ $59.95
05
Rocket Lips ‘The Elvis’ $79
06
Rusty ‘Hyper Atoll Walkshort’ $49.99
07
Cheap Monday ‘Slim Chino’ $89.95
09
10 02
08
Mutewatch ‘Mutewatch Poppy Red’ $279
09
On-Earz ‘TikTok’ $49.99
03
11
12
04
SWATCHES
05
06
07
SHOES 10
Alfie ‘Chuck High Naval Shepard’ $199.95
11
Croft ‘Barlow’ $189.95
12
Urge ‘Charlie + Canvas’ $89.95
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All items available at Karrinyup Shopping Centre
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rising stars
They’re the new gourmet glitterati responsible for creating alchemy with their pots and pans, chefs with attitude, drive and a passion previously only seen in the sporting arena. Introducing RC’s choice of Australia’s most charismatic cooks
Matt Stone The Greenhouse, Perth
The original enfant (not so) terrible of Perth’s exploding foodie scene, Matt Stone is head chef at The Greenhouse, star of Iron Chef and MasterChef 2011. It’s the restaurant which popped up almost organically on St Georges Terrace, a patch of green (thanks to the roof top veggie garden) among the concrete jungle. The Greenhouse is Matt’s spiritual home – the place where eco-friendly cooking sits comfortably next to cutting edge style and kick ass attitude – try the charred octopus, kipflers, green olive and harissa plate at dinner, or after a big one, bubble and squeak with pancetta for breakfast.
Age: 25 What’s on your iPod, Matt?: a bit of everything but mostly pop punk. You Me At Six gets played the most though. What’s your signature dish?: I don’t really have one yet. I’m always getting excited by new tastes and ideas - so they’re constantly changing. Describe your style: I love to cook fresh healthy sharing style food, the food I want to eat. www.greenhouseperth.com
photo: Trish Gallagher
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Nick French
Matt Wilkinson
Built in the late 1800s, Bishop’s House, on the corner of Spring Street and Mounts Bay Road, has a new star in its firmament, chef Nick French. Ex-1907 and Balthazar where he cooked up a storm, Nick is bringing his special skills to the four storey dining venue. The seven course degustation menu, which includes shiraz braised duck with steamed buns, grilled fish with zucchini angel hair and a lamb extravaganza of loin and a ragu of shoulder displays Nick’s deft understanding of the importance, above all, of flavor combinations.
This is a rock star chef who’s earned his chops. Ex-Circa and Alevansi, Matt and business partner Ben Foster started Pope Joan in 2010, with an emphasis on locally grown and seasonal fare. Soon the queues for the pair’s quirky twists on top quality grub were down the street – so, drawing on his childhood memories of being brought up in a pub, Matt and Ben opened the Bishop of Ostia next door to Pope Joan. Expect curious, tongue tickling drinks like the Smokey Eel Sour, served with a side of David’s Pork Scratchings, or the Tom Allen (that’s a pig’s ear sandwich to you and me).
Lamont’s Bishop’s House, Perth
Pope Joan and the Bishop of Ostia, Melbourne
Age: 26 What’s on your iPod, Nick?: I’m currently listening to Love This by Cosmo Jarvis. Describe your style: My food hero is Marco Pierre White and reflecting that, we’re specialising in modern European food here at Bishop’s House – but with a twist. What’s your signature dish?: I’m playing around with desserts at the moment and have come up with this amazing dish. It’s a rum banana concoction with a pecan and maple ice cream, but then we’ve also added some amazing Jamon. Delicious. www.lamonts.com.au/venues/lamonts-perth
Age: 32, What’s on your iPod, Matt?: Tim Buckley, The Black Keys, the sound track to Mary Poppins, Oasis and Otis Taylor. plus shit loads more soul and dirty blues. Describe your style: I’d say it’s Australian, natural, seasonal, vegetable-focused, slight hints to areas of the world but just rocking. What’s your signature dish?: It’s smoked yoghurt with heirloom carrots with a honey and almond dressing, plus a slow cooked sweet and sour goat shoulder with ancient grains. www.popejoan.com.au
Search. Compare. Book. ®
With more than 2500 international destinations now online, why book anywhere else? Conditons apply. See flightcentre.com.au for details. Flight Centre Limited (ABN 25 003 377 188) trading as Flight Centre. Licence No. ACT 18800224, NSW 2TA002719, NT 008, QLD TAG262, SA TTA254, TAS TAS031, VIC 31089, WA 9TA 589.
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1300 653 255 flightcentre.com.au
! t i e v r e You des ar from Kosmic! it gu t ea gr a h it w f Spoil yoursel range online! ge u h r u o t u o k ec h C
Gibson Les Paul Traditional Treat yourself to one of rock’s most famous guitars! The Gibson Les Paul has made history in the hands of legendary players like Clapton, Beck, Page and Slash. Now it’s your turn to experience the awesome power and tone of the Les Paul, and at this price we make it an easy choice. The Les Paul Traditional ships with a deluxe hardshell case. Colours include Heritage Cherry (Pic), Iced Tea, Light Burst, Ebony.
$2798
BONUS GIBSON T-SHIRT & STRAP FOR ROCK CANDY READERS! Online: Redemption Code RC1959 or mention this ad in store!
Fender® American Standard Stratocaster 2012
Maton M225 Acoustic Bluesman Bundle!
The iconic Fender Stratocaster has long been the choice of the world’s great players, like Jimi Hendrix, David Gilmour, Jeff Beck and too many others to mention. The brand new American Standard 2012 Stratocaster could be just the guitar for you to keep the rock and roll flame burning! Heaps of colours available!
Proudly Australian made, the M225 is popular for it’s big, bright tone and high quality at a fair price. Our special offer to you includes a Guitar Gear capo, Hohner Blues Harp and a Jim Dunlop slide, which will make this a great choice for blues, folk, pop and country players.
This great guitar ships with a moulded hard case, strap and cable.
This great guitar ships with a Maton hardshell case.
$1498
$998 TOLL FREE 1800 466 157 | FREE SHIPPING ON ORDERS OVER $50 www.youtube.com/user/kosmicmi www.facebook.com/KosmicSoundPerth info@kosmic.com.au Cannington WA (08) 9258 4236 | Osborne Park WA (08) 9204 7577
YouTube Facebook Email Address
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inside story
TO HELL AND BACK The incredible tale of Nigel Brennan's capture and imprisonment by Somalian gangsters −Story: − − − −Adam − − − Morris −−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−−− Photos: Barbara Bertoli - Nigel Brennan
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inside story
W
hat began as a seven day stopover to cover a North African food crisis in 2008, ended 462 days later with photojournalist Nigel Breenan shackled in chains, tortured, tormented and nearly starved to death by his fanatical kidnappers, his fate hanging in the balance as his family scrambled to secure his freedom thousands of miles away in Australia. The incredible tale of Nigel Brennan’s capture and imprisonment by Somalian gangsters is peppered with escape attempts, regular beatings, mock executions and depraved human cruelty. But it’s also the story of a family’s love, an individual’s will to live and the sacrifices people are willing to make to have their loved ones returned safely home. “I was a freelance photo journalist trying to make it in the world of wartime photography and build a career as a respected reporter willing to cover this century’s most dangerous combat zones,” says Nigel. In mid 2008 Nigel weighed up possible global hotspots where he could prove himself as a snapper. Afghanistan was an obvious choice, but the logistics of securely embedding himself in the wartorn country, coupled with his father’s strong opposition to the American-led war, turned Nigel’s thinking elsewhere. “Keeping it secret from my family, I flew into Somalia on August 20th 2008 with Canadian journalist Amanda Lindhout to cover the food crisis which was unfolding around Afgooye, a town located 25 kms west of Mogadishu.” A the time this was one of the most densely populated places on earth, packed with desperate, displaced people. Little did Nigel know that he would last only three days at liberty in the country, but it was three days he used well, capturing breathtaking images of people in extremis, barely clinging to life. And little did he know that it would be a situation Nigel would find himself in, all too soon. On the 23rd of August, Nigel and Amanda headed out from their hotel away from Mogadishu but they had to drop off their government security as government troops were at high risk in militia controlled zones. “The plan was to drop off the government security at the African Union base at the city limits and pick up militia security a little further en route before arriving at their next IDP camp,” said Nigel. It was during this very small window of time that their car was intercepted and surrounded by a group of masked men wielding automatic weapons. “I was mucking around with my camera and I can remember looking to my right out the window and seeing a guy with a masked face and an AK-47 literally inches from my head. “Looking around I saw a lot of other masked faces, I thought holy shit, something’s not right, the doors were ripped open and we were all thrown face down on the ground. ▶
captivity: somalia
462 US$3
days
ransom:
million
"If you don't become Muslim then the likelihood is we'll get the money for you and then we'll kill you." − − − − − − − − − − − − − − − −Achmed, − − − − − Gang − − − −leader. −−−−
Danger zone: War-ravaged Mogadishu shows the scars of years of fighting with many of its buildings in ruins.
23
inside story
24
inside story
The next few terrifying seconds flashed by in a confusion of noise, violence and terror for Nigel and his companions. “They were waiting for us . . . we’ve no idea who set us up, it could have been the new driver, it could have been a hotel staff member who overheard our conversations planning the next day. . . . I’ll never know.” Nigel and Amanda, and the three Somalian colleagues travelling with them were taken to a vacant house which had a compound structure typical of most houses in and around Mogadishu. There were 12 foot high surrounding walls capped with razor wire and a basic home at the centre – effectively a domestic fortress. “When they arrived at the house there were more men waiting for us, all armed with machine guns,” said Nigel. He counted 13 gang members in total, varying in age between 17 and 25 years old and although they were
Tragedy: The human face of conflict, affecting young and old without discrimination in Somalia.
organised during the abduction, they were far from criminal masterminds. “Retrospecitvely I believe that if the gang had have been more professional, the process may not have taken so long but the chaotic nature of the group made every step of the process painfully complicated, adding to our sense of unease.” Nigel and Amanda were separated and each given a very basic room. “I had a thin mattress, a mosquito net, a bottom sheet, a sarong and a pillow case, but no pillow, my only possessions for the next fifteen months.” The pair would be moved twelve more times over the period of their incarceration to similar accommodation - no furniture, no electricity, no hope. Nigel was approached in the very first week by his kidnappers and told to convert to Islam as it was explained to him without his conversion he would
more than likely be murdered whether they received a ransom or otherwise. “This resulted in a bizarre charade that I had to carry out over the next fourteen and a half months where I would pray five times a day, sometimes side by side with my kidnappers, become very familiar with the Koran and even engage with those abductors in Koranic debate attempting to convince them that God would condemn them for their actions against me.” It was a delicate dance Nigel would tread regularly with his captors doing so with extreme caution, their unpredictable behaviour leaving him in no doubt that his life hung in the balance every day of his incarceration. The families of both Nigel and Amanda were contacted and negotiations began in earnest with the kidnappers asking for US$3 million. Five months later Nigel would still be
25
inside story
Amanda was hauled from the house alone and told she was being taken out to the bush to be executed as her family had not complied with their demands . . .
- - - - - - - Nigel - - - -Brennan - - - - - -describes - - - - - -his - - co-captor’s - - - - - - - -terrifying - - - - - - -ordeal ----
sitting on the same mattress in another house compound with conditions deteriorating rapidly and his family coming nowhere close to raising the money. “The kidnappers were becoming frustrated with the lack of progress and began to lean hard on both Amanda and I to apply pressure on both our families.” The situation escalated in a terrifying way for Amanda one morning. “She was hauled from the house alone and told she was being taken out to the bush to be executed as her family had not complied with their demands,” said Nigel. After a long drive she was dragged from the vehicle and forced to kneel at the foot of a tree. One of the kidnappers held a 9mm pistol to the back of her head and cocked the weapon ready to fire. With Amanda now in hysterics on the ground, they forced her on the phone and made her call her mother in Canada.
The three Somalians who were kidnapped with Nigel also disappeared from the house but unlike Amanda, they never returned. “I was told that they were handed over to the terrorist organisation AlShabaab and promptly beheaded.” In an attempt to keep their spritis up Nigel and Amanda had begun to leave secret messages for each other in their shared toilet. In one of those notes, Amanda indicating that she was receiving “unwanted visitors” and it was under this climate, where things seemed to be spiraling completely out of control, that Nigel decided to attempt an escape. “After carefully and quietly filing away for hours at a bathroom window, Amanda and I met at an agreed time and made our escape.” They were on the street for just twenty seconds when a neighbouring boy screamed something in Somali, alerting the kidnappers that their hostages were on the loose.
With the briefest of head starts Nigel and Amanda ran for their lives through the streets and headed towards a mosque which they knew was vaguely in the direction where the call to prayer had been coming from, five times a day, for the duration of their ordeal. “Without looking back we ran in the midday sun with locals looking at us, shaking their heads as we raced past.” Reaching the mosque in a matter of minutes they ran into a crowded space filled with worshippers at the noon service. Pure chaos ensued. “I found some English speaking Muslims and frantically told them we had been kidnapped, all the while knowing we only had a matter of seconds before the gang members would be coming through the door.” Nigel began reeling off the Islam affirmation of faith in Arabic to convince them he was a Muslim brother. He managed to quickly convince members of the congregation and many people began circling around Nigel and Amanda, both out of charity as well as curiosity. One man even handed Nigel an AK-47 saying this was the weapon of Islam and as Nigel was his brother he should arm himself accordingly, a proposition Nigel considered for the briefest of moments before handing it back. Within moments the gang leaders burst through the mosque door and began arguing and fighting with the crowd trying to get to Nigel and Amanda. “The room was becoming a swirling mess of people pushing, pulling and shouting,” he said. “l had been told to wait as a local Imam was on his way to help us, but before he arrived, Amanda was dragged out of the mosque by her hair. I heard a gunshot ring out on the streets.” In the dark as to whether Amanda had been summarily executed, Nigel too began preparing himself for his own death. “To my left I saw a masked gunman who I didnt recognise holding a AK-47 standing in the doorway of the mosque just a few metres from where I was standing.” The mysterious gunman was not alone - another half dozen or so were with him, rifles in hand, waiting for the worshippers who were now emptying out onto the street. Nigel would never find out who these men were, maybe members of Al-Shabaab, the Mujahideen Youth movement, maybe just another outlaw gang who had contracted the kidnappers to snatch Nigel and Amanda in the first place, and had been alerted to the fact their “cargo” was on the loose. The mosque emptied, the Imam never materialised and Nigel was dragged back to face his raging captors who he had just so very publically humiliated. Nigel would spend the next eleven months of his life shackled in chains in a dark room set on starvation rations as the protracted negotiations between the kidnappers, Nigel’s family and some very special private contractors took place. Amanda’s story is equally shocking ▶
26
inside story
and is one, that Nigel states, is her own to tell. Nigel has great respect for Amanda but says their journeys both during the kidnapping, as well as after their release, were very different ones. Nigel himself embarked on writing the Price of Life along with his sisters to put to rest the horrifying events of his ordeal and to put closure on everything that had taken place. He hopes readers will appreciate their families more after reading their book and value the things
FACTBOX: The Price of Life is available in all good bookstores or online at www.penguin.com for $29.95
in life so often taken for granted. The story is as miraculous as it is complex and the very nature of Nigel’s survival and the lengths to which his family went in order to secure it, are just as compelling. “My family embarked on some courageous risk taking which lead to acts of money laundering, international smuggling and the breaking of dozens of Commonwealth and international laws, all to bring me safely back home to Australia.” Nigel’s story is about kidnapping,
gangsters, torture and cruelty but it’s also the story of an ordinary Australian family discovering what they’re capable of and how far they’re prepared to go for what they believe in. Life. Freedom. Whatever the price. Nigel is currently working as a photojournalist in Nepal documenting rescue workers saving young girls from the Indian sex trade.
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story
29
& photos: Jordan Leist
motoring
SUDDEN IMPACT Mitchell Lindschau’s HSV Maloo is a modern day work of art.
L
imited external modification was the name of the game for Mitchell Lindschau and his 2008 model HSV Maloo with the drop dead gorgeous looks. “I wanted to keep things simple and find the right parts that yielded the most impact without having to repaint the car or go to crazy with it,” said Mitch. “I was chasing a mix of American and European influences to create the exact look I wanted to achieve and always felt that this was an avenue that Australian modifiers have missed over the years.” Purchased direct off the show room floor, Mitch wanted a blank canvas to work with
and began his modifications within weeks. “I ordered the car in black but minus the leather trim option as I knew I was going to mark my own style in the cabin straight away.” That style has made a massive impact on the car’s interior. “This is where I wanted the Euro influence to shine the most. I researched Lambos and Aston Martins to make sure I was going to nail the theme on the head. I just loved the classy look of the stitched diamond pattern which was the ideal image for the Maloo.” A combination of red macro suede and black leather with red stitching does the job
on the seats and the door trims, and there are hints of red on the wheel and behind the bucket seats. Nestled between those seats is a custom airbrushed nitrous bottle which is not just there for looks alone. The mild 50hp shot of gas takes the power figure of the mighty Maloo up to a credible 505rwhp. Rob at House of Power was the man responsible for the mods on the LS2 engine. A custom grind cam was installed along with Wilson 92mm Fast inlet manifold with a 90mm throttle body. Pacemaker headers with a twin 3-inch stainless steel system makes sure that the exhaust gases are evacuated fast, announcing to the neighbourhood that Mitch
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motoring
THE LOWDOWN MITCH LINDSCHAU 2008 E-SERIES HSV MALOO
COLOUR: HSV BLACK
GRUNT
ENGINE: LS2 CAM: ‘HOP’ Custom Grind THROTTLE BODY: 90mm EXHAUST: Pacemaker Headers, Twin 3-Inch S/S System HORSEPOWER: 453rwhp or 505rwhp with Nitrous
SHIFT is in town. Tired of breaking manual gearboxes Mitch gave the T-56 the flick and opted for a Turbo 350 box with a 4,800rpm high-stall. A Tru-Trac rear end replaces the factory differential internals and with a great looking standard brake package fitted, Mitch left that area as is. Adam Spiteri at Cronic Customs got the go-ahead to remove the door handles and at the same time shave the aerial too. “I just wanted that smooth look that the US guys do so well. It’s funny how many people don’t even notice the handles are gone,” laughed Mitch. The body kit on the car is the factory Maloo set up but far from standard are those amazing looking 22x9-inch MOZ Concours rollers. “I imported the rims from the US at a cost
of $11k. As soon as I saw them I wanted them so the cost was never an issue.” Adding his own unique touch to the wheels, Mitch had the lips painted red to match the interior parts and to add some contrast to the black on black look of the ute. Slamming the car to the concrete and right over the top of the 245/30 series rubber are Pedders Extreme, fully adjustable coilover shocks. Proving the car is more than just your average streeter, Mitch had the car shipped over east to compete in the inaugural Auzrun event and had a ball competing in the 1500km challenge. Since then, the car has seen regular street use but in the pipeline for Mitch is a very heavy duty build on his VL Commodore which should be something to behold upon its completion.
GEARBOX: Turbo 350 CONVERTER: 4,800rpm Hi-Stall DIFF: Tru-Trac
BUMP
SHOCKS: Pedders Extreme Coilovers BRAKES: HSV
ROLLING STOCK
WHEELS: MOZ Concours 22x9 TYRES: 245/30/22
BIG UPS
Scott & Rob @ Tech9Tyres Rob @ House of Power Adam @ Cronic Customs Chris @ Trimcare James @ Proshine Detailing
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story:
Alan Crane
motoring
Big on style
W
ith an advertising spend in the millions, there’s been no shortage of TV spots pushing the new generation Colorado. This suggests Holden is either really proud of its new big ass ute, or really desperate. When you get to drive one though, a third option appears. It’s more than up to the job but has nothing to really set itself apart from cool new kids such as Volkswagen’s Amarok or the sector’s number one – the HiLux (which sells so well you could be forgiven for thinking Toyota puts crack in the air conditioning). This could explain the advertising blitz while appealing to Australia’s loyalty to the Holden badge (which is probably made in China). The Colorado is actually a real multicultural affair - designed by GM and made in Thailand but Holden has put together
an impressive array of Australian designed accessories to give it some local flavour (it’s nice to see some Aussie involvement, even if isjust a bulbar, canopy or rubber mat). The high-end LTZ variant tested here has the more impressive of the two engine options. This 4-cylinder 2.8 litre turbo diesel pumps out 132kW of power and 470Nm (440Nm in the manual) of torque which is more than enough in most situations but is unlikely to get competitors wondering just how they managed it. Despite these respectable figures there are times with a heavy payload or in testing terrain when there does seem to be more than a fair bit of whinging, judging from the noise and the rev counter which doesn’t instil much confidence. Even if it does make a fuss, the
3500kg towing capacity is up there with the best on the market. For the cheaper options a 2.5-litre turbodiesel version is out there and brings in 110 kW of power and 350 Nm of torque but with a reduced towing capacity of three tonnes – so you’ll just have to buy a smaller boat. The LTZ crew cab comes in at $51,990* which makes it a few thousand cheaper than its comparable competitors such as the Nissan STX or Volkswagen’s Amarok. The Colorado has the looks and is certainly more aesthetically pleasing than a HiLux (surely the plainest of all utes). Inside it’s generically nicely fitted out but the instrument layout is an absolute winner, a few quibbles aside. Simple, well laid out and within easy reach - nothing is fiddly or needs a degree in engineering to figure out.
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motoring
Contender: Holden’s Colorado is taking on the popular rival utes Hilux and Amarok models head on.
LTZ crew cab 4X4 Price - $51,990* Engine – 4-cylinder 2.8-litre Duramax turbo diesel Power – 132kW @ 3800rpm Torque – 440Nm @ 2000rpm (manual)/470Nm @ 2000rpm (automatic)
It’s always a good idea to have distinct controls for the basics – audio, air con and the essentials. The air con is especially easy to get to grips with thanks to a big central dial. It is also quick to react – even in this crew cab variant. The audio system is also sharp and clear with buttons that are simple to use, without too much in the way of multi-functionalism, but you have to doubt the genius thinking of putting the connector sockets for MP3 players and auxiliaries on the front of the panel. This means a long cable (or even two) is needed to connect an iPod and there is no compartment for it to sit in safely. The best bet is the storage box on top of the dash but there is no space for a cable fit through and the player it is thrown about. Another option is a cup holder
which at least allows easier access. I chose the latter and regretted it the instant I went over the first ridge off road, sending my iPod flying straight under the seat. Apart from this lack of thought, it’s a sweet layout. Putting a dial for the lights on the dash is a smart move and means there is one less stick to hit when needing to spin the steering wheel. The 2WD/4WD low/4WD high selection dial is close to hand and is easily activated. Some will be disappointed with the seats. They are a bit spongy and synthetic with deep grooves that are bound to trap a lot of crap. On bitumen and gravel roads the ride is smooth and relaxing but could have been more effective when the bumps and jerking about became more serious. If conditions get too bad at least the
Transmission – 5-speed manula/6-speed auto Fuel tank capacity – 76 litres Towing (braked/unbraked) – 3500kg/750kg Gross vehicle mass – 6000kg ANCAP safety rating – five star *Plus on-road costs.
Colorado crew and space cabs all achieved a five star ANCAP safety rating which will be a big win for Holden as businesses look to meet more safety stringent conditions. This is also a huge selling point for regular road users as there are an increasing number of Hyundai and BMW drivers out on the roads and their driving is not getting any better. So it’s a maximum score for safety; if only the engine was as exceptional this ute could be real contender. Saying this, Holden dealers have been busy with the order books and more than 1500 orders had been placed before the first Colorado had even reached the forecourts. None of the customers will be particularly disappointed but it is doubtful there will be enough to fulfil Holden’s dreams of making the Colorado the go-to ute on the market.
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r u o b a L a a e v o of L story:
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motoring
Adam Morris
hen you meet Roger from M’Mates Place you might be mistaken for thinking that you’re in the middle of a Slim Dusty song. The weather-worn Australian looks like he’s been shearing sheep for a hundred years, running a pub in the outback for a hundred more and spinning yarns all the while without missing a beat. Roger runs M’Mates Place DIY workshop in Forrestfield. It’s basically a fully fitted out workshop, with a fully qualified mechanic where you can bring your car, van, truck, rig and get any kind of work done on it for about twenty percent of the usual cost. The catch is you have to lend a hand and do a bit of the work yourself but you’ll have all the guidance and more importantly all the tools to help you get the job done. Roger set up M’Mates Place as both a family business as well as a community project of sorts. Roger reckons there’s a two speed economy in Perth and not everyone is earning half a million a year working as a management supervisor up on the mines. For every haul pack and grader that gets slung round the outback there’s the people up north washing dishes and making beds who aren’t making nearly as much money as some people would have you believe. For a lot of people, spending a thousand dollars on mechanical repairs (that can be done for a fraction of the cost at M’Mates Place) is simply beyond what the pale. Roger says the same principal applies even more so down in Perth where a lot
of people do it very hard and he wanted to provide a space where functional mechanical repairs, as well as labour of love jobs like spray painting and hot rod polishing (as we saw the day we went for a visit) are all on offer, and all at affordable prices. Helping people by keeping costs down seems to be Roger’s true passion. “I don’t think kids have the same opportunities as people did when I was growing up,” he says. “The opportunity that you can front up for any job, work hard and keep a job doesn’t seem to exist so much anymore.” Roger’s background explains his appreciation for people doing it hard and he says he learned his life lessons working for himself nearly every day of the last fifty odd years. Roger’s first job was as a larder boy in a South Australian general store back when rock n’ roll was a new fad, and the young lad could be found every day before and after school cutting up blocks of butter and weighing out bags of sugar at the tender age of seven. “I think teenagers and the kids today need a good go, so we like to mentor the kids here. They get access to Wayne the mechanic downstairs for twenty dollars for fifteen minutes. A couple of young boys came in the other day and did a gearbox themselves, Wayne helped out when they needed him but they got the job done and saved a good bit of money at the same time.” Roger says the idea behind M’Mates Place is not just cars and rock and roll, it’s
about getting people together. Clients can work on their cars, watch Bathurst or boxing on the big screen, catch up with mates and get what they need to do, no dramas. As well as the spray room, the hoists, the trailers and oxys, Roger has also set up a fifties style diner which opens for lunch and the soon-to-be restaurant and already operational function room upstairs provides a space where you can get an affordable meal in a relaxed atmosphere. Roger’s attitude to community and life in general is summed up when asked if the restaurant is licensed. “It’s BYO cause to get a license there’s too many restrictions and I’m not a man who likes restrictions.” At any given day, as well as seeing blokes working on their trucks or cars, you might see a passing vintage car club fill the car park outside with a swag load of families standing around barbecues, having a gander and sharing some good times together. There’s also music in the workshop and not always just on the stereo. Roger has had a few blues bands perform up on the hoists on a couple of special nights and is open to anyone wanting to celebrate a birthday or an anniversary in a pretty special venue - especially if you love the smell of oil. For more information visit M’Mates Place at www.mmatesplace.com.au. You’ll find all the info you need to save yourself big money on your next big job as well as the chance to work in a genuinely friendly workshop - worthy of the name on the front door.
Colin Farrell on how actors are just like FIFO workers, why he gave up the grog and what being part of the Total Recall reboot means to him
memory man 36 story:
photos:
cover story Gill Pringle courtesy of Sony Pictures
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cover story
Y
I’m Irish, I don’t want to f****** hear about giving up drinking, just get me off pills, powder, yada, yada, yada…
Colin Farrell as Doug Quaid goes where Arnie went 20 years previously.
ou might be surprised to hear that those big shot movie stars you see on the silver screen have more in common with your average FIFO worker than most professions – well, that’s according to Colin Farrell, currently starring in a remake of sci-fi movie Total Recall, in a role originally made famous by Arnold Schwarzenegger. “You’re away from home for months on end, its plays havoc with your personal relationships and it’s hard to adjust to routines once you return to your regular life,” says Farrell, 36, when Rock Candy caught up with him recently in Beverly Hills. “But, look, I’m not going to whine about it. I don’t want to come across as an over-paid actor complaining about making sacrifices because I’m really lucky to do what I do.” A former hell-raiser who experienced brief notoriety over a sex tape scandal involving a Playboy model, he’s seven years sober. Instead of a fully stocked bar, today his only demand while working on long location shoots is for a blender in his trailer, where he juices up healthy anti-oxidant-rich power drinks. “I like to prepare my own green juice - kale, spinach, romaine, parsley, cucumber, celery, apple, lemon and ginger. It looks weird but its actually not bad. “Drinking [booze] used to take up eight hours of my day but when you stop drinking you have time to do a lot of other things. So I fill a lot of my time by reading books. Boredom can lead to relapses so I keep myself busy,” he says. “And it’s funny, I didn’t even go to rehab intending to stop the drinking. I just wanted to get off everything else. I literally went to rehab and on the first day I went, ‘I’m Irish, I don’t want to f****** hear about giving up drinking, just get me off pills, powder, yada, yada, yada…’ “About two weeks into rehab I thought: Why am I fighting to keep this booze thing in my life, really? Why is it such a deep part of my identity? And here I am today. Sober,” explains the Irish-born son of a footballer whose previous roles include country rocker, criminal, vampire, cop, bi-sexual and Alexander the Great. Playing a special agent/factory worker who doesn’t know which of his identities is true in Total Recall, he spent four months on location in Toronto with co-stars Kate Beckinsale and Jessica Biel. “I haven’t done anything this physical for six or seven years - every day I was running, jumping, fighting, shooting, punching, screaming and getting hit,” says Farrell. As much a character actor as he is leading man, his breakout role came in 2000 starring as Private Roland Bozz in Tigerland. Two years later, he reached a far wider audience playing a cop, chasing Tom Cruise in Minority Report. Since then he’s earned a Golden Globe for his portrayal of a hit man in the dramedy, In Bruges, as well as earning acclaim for roles in Phone Booth, Intermission and The Recruit. Mixing up flashy lead roles with small character studies - such as his hilarious
turn as a creepy overweight sleazeball with a comb-over in last year’s comedy Horrible Bosses - his volatile private life has often threatened to overshadow his accomplishments. Something of a ladies man, he previously dated a string of beauties including Britney Spears and Demi Moore, and was famously stalked by a disgruntled telephone sex worker who even recorded a song about him called Colin Farrell is My Bitch. “I tend to find women very attractive, regardless of race, colour or cultural background or even language barrier,” he admits. Today he’s a single dad to nine year-old son James with US model Kim Bordenave and Henry, three, with Mexican actress Alicja Bachleda, and although he’s no longer romantically involved with the mothers, they all share cordial relationships for the sake of the boys. His eldest son suffers from Angelman Syndrome, a rare genetic disorder, diagnosed five years ago when the little boy began to have seizures. “I hope that I’m a caring father,” he says. “I think having kids imbues you with a greater level of strength and also a greater level of fear. The heart expands and also the mind. It’s been the most incredibly enriching experience and I hope we continue to get on the way we do because we all seem to like each other. “The boys have been on set with me but they get really bored. $135 million action film vs. $2 rubber ball? The ball wins out every time. So they hang out in the trailer, they play in the car park and throw the ball around and watch films, and then I see them at night.” For one of Hollywood’s highest paid leading men, Farrell’s home-away-from-home creature comforts are refreshingly minimal. “I bring a pillow for my bed and a cushion and a throw for my couch in my living room. I bring a bunch of candles that I already started lighting at home and about 20 to 30 books and a guitar. That’s it really. No gadgets or computer games or stuff. I’m not great with technology apart from the Skype so I can keep in touch with my boys when they’re not with me. “Even this thing gives me a headache,” he says indicating his iPhone. Growing up in Dublin, Farrell enjoyed watching the original Total Recall in 1990 starring Schwarzenegger and Sharon Stone. Based on Philip K. Dick’s famous short story “We Can Remember It For You Wholesale“, both films are about reality and memory, although the original is set on Mars whereas this re-make takes place in a post-apocalyptic earth where only The United Federation of Britain and The Colony remain. “There are a couple of things that I wished we might have kept from the original such as going to Mars but I think it turned out really well to go in the opposite direction so that this is an incredibly different cinematic experience. “If you’re doing a remake it’s incredibly bold to really try and re-imagine it and reformulate a magnificent concept that was explored so wonderfully the first time out.”
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cover story
Second time around Remakes of classic movies are everywhere, from the forthcoming Judge Dredd rehash to The Girl with Dragon Tattoo (minus Swedish prose). Which reboots work and which classics should have just remained untouched forever? ------------------------------------story:
Jude Jones
I reckon the hangovers in Hollywood are hardcore. Why? Well, it’s an empathy thing. As a seasoned and often well-oiled hack, I know that, some days, getting creative is harder than others. Days after the night before, generally, when the tequila headache still looms hard. It’s normally at that point that the boss, oblivious to the mild case of alcohol poisoning coursing through my veins, skips up to my desk and demands we brainstorm feature ideas. Looking up at her through bloodshot eyes, it’s hard for me to imagine what I’m going to have for dinner, let alone what will entertain our readers. So, rather than let on that I’m not up to it, I call on the journos’ classic fallback – rehashing something we’ve done before. Hey, it’s easier than making stuff up from scratch. And that, I presume, is the driving force behind the silver screen’s long, long history of going back over ground they’ve trodden before. Just look at the list, there’s loads of them – and a lot show the truth in the old adage that you just shouldn’t go back. Take Psycho, for instance. No, not Hitchcock’s seminal thriller that had them screaming in the aisles back in 1960 – Gus Van Sant’s dodgy remake in 1998. What was the thinking there? Did he really imagine he was going to get anyone to out Anthony Perkins Anthony Perkins? Was he really going to make Janet Leigh’s demise any more cinematically perfect? And then you’ve got the whole twist thing. You might as well remake Sixth Sense and (spoiler alert) hope no one knows Bruce is dead. A lot of horror classics fall into the reheated turkey category. Yes, I’ll give you that the 2010 version of I Spit on Your Grave, 2006’s The Hills Have Eyes, Texas Chainsaw
Massacre circa 2003 and 2011’s Straw Dogs were all entertaining in a ‘get them out on DVD and watch with a beer’ kind of way, but none of them lived up to the original. And it’s not just horrors that leave the critics cold. Take the 2003 remake of The Italian Job. Souped-up BMW Minis were never going to be enough to replace Michael Caine telling his gadget guy he was only supposed to blow the bloody doors off. Of course, screenwriters looking for inspiration can sneak a film out without it being completely obvious that they’ve been copying over someone’s shoulder. Three Men and a Baby, for instance, was based on a French flick, Trois Hommes et un Couffin, which had only come out a couple of years before, while True Lies was an American version of La Totale, another Gallic offering. And John Carpenter’s brilliant monster mash The Thing – itself remade recently – was inspired by 1951 creature feature The Thing From Another World. To give him his due, though, Carpenter did actually prove that you can gild a lily. There, I have to say, was a remake that outdid the original in spades, proving that even if they are thin on the ground, good ones are definitely out there. On that short list, you’ll find the likes of Cape Fear, the spine-tingling thriller that saw Scorsese coax De Niro into one of his many classic performances. That was a remake of the 1962 version - also brilliant - but now sitting proudly as the classic take. The only people who’ve dared to remake it since have been The Simpsons, but even Sideshow Bob couldn’t steal De Niro’s crown. Ocean’s Eleven, too, took a plot and made it its own, with Brad, George and Julia easily upstaging the 1960 offering, while The Last House on the Left and The Fly proved that you can take a horror and make it scream even louder. Oh, and you can, of course, take our word for it that Wiseman’s take on Total Recall fits into that list – we were pretty impressed, give or take a few raised eyebrows regarding plot tweaks. Compared to Arnie’s wooden ride to Mars, Colin’s battle with amnesia is a gem. Go see it. Then wait 20 years for the reboot’s reboot.
Compared to Arnie’s wooden ride to Mars, Colin’s battle with amnesia is a gem
Action man: Stills from Total Recall, starring Colin Farrell, Jessica Biel, Bryan Cranston and Kate Beckinsale, courtesy of Sony Pictures
Same, same but different The original Total Recall had some iconic characters and moments – what made the cut in the reboot and what has mysteriously disappeared?
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Don’t worry, the woman with the three tits is still there, as is the hot black receptionist at Rekall. Apart from them though, there’s not a whole lot left from Paul Verhoeven’s original in the new, 2012 version. Mars? Nope. The big red planet, made so newsworthy recently when the Yanks dropped a remote-control buggy called Curiosity onto it simply doesn’t get a look in as Doug (Colin Farrelll) and Melina (Jessica Biel) battle the forces of evil. Which is quite a shift really, seeing as the original had more red dirt landscape shots than a ‘Come To The Kimberley’ ad. In fact, our heroes don’t even get to leave the planet it’s all about the poles in Wiseman’s re-imagining, with a feck-off big elevator running right through the Earth delivering citizens of the future from one hemisphere to the other. And as Mars disappears into the ether, so does the other big theme of TR1 - mining. Which, obviously, to us is a bit disappointing as it would’ve been good to see what today’s special effect geeks could’ve come up with for the future of the industry that keeps us all afloat. And no Mars obviously means no Martian artefacts and no mind-reading mutants. The other thing, of course, that isn’t in the new one is Michael Ironside, which is always a mistake. Everything’s better with Michael Ironside in it - surely everyone knows that? Sure they’ve got the bloke from Breaking Bad, and Notting Hill’s Bill Nighy, but you can’t help feeling a bit shortchanged for the lack of Ironside’s particular brand of Cohaagen nastiness.
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Below from left: Colin Farrell (magicinfoto / Shutterstock.com) - Kate Beckinsale and Jessica Biel (Joe Seer / Shutterstock.com) - Bryan Cranston (Helga Esteb / Shutterstock.com) Bill Nighy (s_bukley / Shutterstock.com) - Kaitlyn Leeb (Sony Pictures)
So who’s who in TR2? Doug Quaid/Colin Farrell There’s not that many action heroes who go by the name of Douglas, but that’s the moniker our cover star Colin Farrell wakes up with. True, he’s probably actually Carl Hauser – a much cooler way to introduce yourself if you’re a special agent – so perhaps the bad eggs at the United Federation of Britain picked Doug simply to knock his ego down a few pegs or two. Perhaps they toyed with Tarquin and Arthur before finally deciding. Farrell, though, is the perfect man to play Douglas Quaid, the construction worker who may or may not have had his memories of being a secret agent sucked out of his brain after realising his bosses were a bunch of chancers. The Irishman brings a touch of bemused semi-psycho to the role, as happy struggling with his mind issues – he’s battled his own fair share of demons in real life - as he is beating the crap out of Cohaagen’s henchmen. He made his name in some class blockbusters – Minority Report, Phone Booth, Horrible Bosses, that kind of thing – but also has an impressive array of indy successes behind him. The boy from Dublin can act as well as kick arse. Lori Quaid/Kate Beckinsale Some would say that if you woke up next to Kate Beckinsale and were then told that you weren’t actually married to her, that your memory had been erased and she was a secret agent who was going to jump your bones while watching over you, the obvious reaction would just be to sigh ‘meh’ and pull
her back under the duvet. Quaid, obviously, doesn’t do this – it would’ve made for a shorter and very different kind of movie if he had – which gives the dropdead English actress a chance to show off her bad gal, femme fatale side honed in other Len Wiseman (her husband in real life as it happens) moves to the full. Reprising the role that Sharon Stone made her own back in Arnie’s version, Beckinsale stays as tough and beautiful as Lori as she was every time she took down a werewolf in the Underworld series. A star that can act as well as look pretty in a promo image – she’s done a lot of costume drama palaver as well as dodging stakes and garlic – it’s hard to take your eyes off her as she does her best to anihilate her pretend husband. Melina/Jessica Biel He doesn’t do birds by half, that Douglas Quaid. While his fake wife is the beautiful Kate B, the real love of his life turns out to be the equally jaw-dropping Jessica Biel (you know, Justin Timberlake’s bird). But the American belle, who brings to life resistance fighter Melina, probably doesn’t need us to point out just how gorgeous she is having had both Esquire and Stuff magazines proclaim her the sexiest woman in the world over the years. This was, of course, a few years after she burst onto the scene in some American family-drama – 7th Heaven, anyone? – as a teenager, but since then her simmering presence in action blockbusters such as The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Blade: Trinity and The A Team, let alone her lighter, less violent comings and goings in I Now
Pronounce you Chuck and Larry, and The Illusionist, have established her firmly in the top ranks of Hollywood glitterati. Cohaagen/Bryan Cranston Oh. My. God. It’s Malcolm’s dad. We’re guessing that Bryan Cranston cringes a little when people say that, but there’s no getting away from the fact that when he first looms large as Chancellor Vilos Cohaagen it’s hard not to have the theme tune of Malcolm in the Middle arrive as an unwanted earworm. Still, it’s not long before you stop expecting Lois to appear with Dewey over her shoulder and accept Cranston as the evil son of a bitch he is in Total Recall. He’s got range, you see, this chap, so he can easily leave Malcolm and Hal behind and become a future-world super villain. Past success outside the MitM stage have included being part of that magnificent ensemble cast of Little Miss Sunshine, the surprise indy flick that took the movie world by storm back in 2006. He was also in Saving Private Ryan as more than just beach cannon fodder and – and this is one for the trivia fans among you – was the voice of Vitaly the macho Russian tiger in Madagascar 3. Here, though, he’s shed fatherhood in favour of frosty malevolence – and Total Recall’s all the better for it. Matthias/Bill Nighy Who would you follow blindly if the shit went down and you found yourself in a guerrilla movement trying to depose a ruthless dictator? Here at RC, we think you wouldn’t look much further than Bill Nighy for the kind of steely,
pensive, intellectual mentor that would have you jumping into the abyss at his very word. The Englishman is perfect for the role of Matthias, the rebel leader looking to restore freedom to a planet Earth destroyed by idiotic politics and corporate greed. Nighy is the quintessential quality actor who has brought his thespian skills and gravitas to Hollywood and had producers slavering at the thought of him in their castlist. His CV reads like a must-see movie directory: Shaun of the Dead, one of the Harry Potters, Pirates of the Carribbean, Love Actually and a couple of Underworlds alongside Kate Beckinsale – not to mention his TV work that brought him a BAFTA for State of Play and the chance to get up close and personal with the Tardis in an episode of Doctor Who. Great rebel leader then – and one of the few actors around that could upstage the bloody gut-residing monster who led the freedom fighters last time around. The Three Breasted Woman/Kaitlyn Leeb This one, of course, is just for the picture since the character is only on screen for five minutes. Kaitlyn Leeb plays the role that most of us remember Arnie’s Total Recall for – the threebreasted prostitute passed over by Douglas Quaid in favour of the regular-titted Melina. Since that version, though, special effects have come on leaps and bounds, so the Canadian actor’s extraneous boob looks way, way real. Seriously, when she pops up for her brief outing in the new TR, you’ll believe that the future holds some top-rate perks among the alarming dystopia.
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Clever clog stuff Paul Verhoeven’s original vision for Total Recall predicted a surprising number of sci-fi innovations which have become part of our every day life – and then there are the ones which ended up in the ideas bin.
tr2 The Verdict
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Jude Jones
Mullets, frizzy perms and day-glo lycra. Seriously, Verhoeven? That was your vision of our near future? OK, I can see the mileage in dropping a touch of today into your vision of tomorrow Bladerunner’s bars, the sharp suits of Aliens’ corporate baddies, that kind of thing - but basing your Martian dystopia on the arse-end of the decade that made the 70s look stylish and you’re onto a loser from the beginning. Fads, though, are just going to get sucked straight out the airlock as soon as someone gets the chance to press the button. You really shouldn’t have packed your time capsule with legwarmers and ra-ra skirts. And it wasn’t just the fashions TR1 got wrong - its vision of the mining world looks laughingly smallscale to the people who deal with it on a daily basis in 2012. Those drill-nosed machines that chased Quaid and co round the Red Planet? My ute’s bigger than that. Compared to the toys you get to play with at the Superpit, those future miners were trying to dig up Mars with a plastic knife and fork. Still, it’s a tough job, predicting the future and, to give him his due, Verhoeven did get a few things right. Yeah, you have to keep your eyes peeled for them, but there were a few gems when we dug out our scratchy old DVD and gave Arnie’s version a fresh viewing. Frickin’ big TVs, for instance. Verhoeven knew those bastards were coming. Arnie and Shazza Stone had three of them side by side in their futureworld unit, pumping out all kinds of nonsense. OK, so they still had the bulging, domed screens that our kids will never have to put up with, but even so, I know a few
Total Recall competition
Bogans round my way that’d get a bit moist with that kind of diameter in their theatre-rooms. Then there was the full-body x-ray that looked for weapons hidden as commuters getting on the subway, which at least got TR1 close, if not all the way to, the full cigar. After all, we do have full-body checks now, except 21st-century Earthlings have to run the gauntlet of security cams that get you nekkid something Verhoeven, with the penchant for flesh he later displayed in Basic Instinct and Showgirls, must now be kicking himself for not predicting. More on the money was TR1’s view of futuristic advertising. As Doug Quaid, Arnie got his inspiration to visit brain-meddling virtual tour firm Recall by watching a TV ad as he rode the subway home. Today, flickering screens trying to dupe us into buying stuff we don’t need are commonplace in taxis and trains around the world, so chalk another one up to the original blockbuster there. And iPads – somehow Verhoeven knew they were coming too. Unfortunately he didn’t envisage touchscreens, so the pads the medics at Recall used all had dinky little pens hanging off them, meaning they looked like old school Magna Doodles but still, good effort. Gadget-wise, though, the original TR is quite often on the money. Arnie got his first set of instructions via an honest-to-goodness laptop; when he picked his dream woman before getting his implant, the selection screen could have been from The Sims or some PS3 wrestling game; and it nailed the whole GPS thing as Michael Ironside and his four-eyed mate tried to track our hero down. Add to that the coded hotel key thing - spot on as far as rent-a-room technology goes, even if the film’s vision of how the Mars Hilton would be furnished was some hellish brown aberration that you’d be embarrassed to take a Northbridge bird on a first date to - and, all in all, you have to say that perhaps Verhoeven’s vision of the shape of things to come wasn’t actually too ridiculous. Which is a good thing, if only because it means we may one day get to see the multi-gender showers he offered up in Starship Trooper.
You may have spotted that Total Recall has had a make over, with a visually stunning new version starring Colin Farrell currently having his mind messed with on the big screen. We’ve got five Total Recall prize packs to give away, including a Stormtrooper drink bottle, a snazzy silicon watch, a light up pen (for all those writing in the dark occasions), a Total Recall branded t-shirt, and a double in season passes to the film, valid from September 6 onwards. If you’d like to be in with a chance of scooping the lot (valued at $135 per pack), then just answer this simple question: Who originally played the role of Doug in Total Recall? Was it: a) Arnold, the kid from Diff’rent Strokes; b) Tom Arnold; or c) Arnold Schwarzenegger? Send your answer, plus contact details to competitions@candymedia.com.au by September 20. Five lucky winners will receive a double pass to see the movie plus exclusive Total Recall merchandise. For full terms and conditions please visit our Facebook page.
So with all the hype surrounding the movie (of which we’ve played our own small part here at RC Towers), there were certain facts we already knew before sitting down with some popcorn and fizzy drink to watch Total Recall’s reboot. Mars was no longer a feature – the entire action was to take place on Earth (albeit a weird version of Earth). Arnie, despite considering taking a role in the new version, has been replaced by Colin Farrell, so at least we knew he’d make a pretty good fist of the acting shenanigans. And instead of swapping a blonde ‘fake’ wife (aka Sharon Stone in the original) for a darker model, Doug was effectively barely changing his preferences when he ditched Kate Beckinsale (brunette) for Jessica Biel (also brunette). So we’re all up to speed and ready to roll. Out with the sometimes shonky cult classic, in with TR for the me, me, me generation. As it’s only rated M, we’ve come to terms with the fact that this ain’t no hardcore revisit to the future, but for all that, the movie is fast paced and probably more family friendly than the original. Farrell as the confused, introspective Doug brings depth to the role which Arnie could only dream about, facing his demons mentally and physically with an excellent baddy in the form of Bryan Cranston as Cohaagen. Beckinsale does her best to mess with his mind some more, looking every inch the director’s wife as well as Doug’s female nemesis. Biel, perhaps more comfortable in less adrenalin-pumping roles like the magician-loving bird in period fable The Illusionist is something of a revelation as Melina – Doug’s dream girl. The pair zip around this new imagined future in airborne cars, like some massive version of a PS3 driving game, except with the very real possibility they’ll cop it on the bonnet. Personally I missed some of the prosthetics of the first version – although the three breasted woman looks remarkably like she actually has three breasts (note to self, must Google that as a possibility) – and there was something endearing about Arnie’s lumbering about and Austrian accent over Colin’s celticness. However, if you forget the fact that Total Recall is a remake, and just go along for a wild, thrilling ride, then this reboot will run and run. Total Recall is rated M and is showing at cinemas across Australia now.
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Jude Jones
entertainment
Game on!
GAMING’S COME A LONG DAY SINCE THE DAYS OF PONG AND THE PRINCE OF PERSIA - THANKFULLY...
G
one are the days when ‘computer games’ were lightweight distractions for 12-year-olds fighting over joysticks when their mates came round to play. Today’s gaming world has a dark side that many mums and dads haven’t noticed slipping into their kids’ bedrooms. And that dark side is there for one simple reason. The generation weaned on Sonic and the two Italian plumbers has grown up – and just as we were never going to grow out of footy, we’re not going to grow out of gaming either. The average age of the hands wrapped around controllers or those fingers flying across the keyboard is no longer hovering around the teens – nowadays every other bloke, and a fair few women, in their 20s, 30s and 40s will be heading home after a long shift to relax in front of their PC or spark up their PS3s. As grown-ups they don’t want to be playing kids’ games any more than they want to take in a few episodes of iCarly. What they want is what they want from their movies – sex and violence. Agreed, back in the day both were hovering in the background – Mortal Kombat’s blood-spattered ‘Finish Him!’ fatalities had the puritanical press howling and, even if Google pretends it never existed, I can clearly remember the bootlegged copies of Soho Sex Quest we loaded onto our Spectrums. While SSQ offered nothing more than text-based adventure game thrills – and lame ones at that (one puzzle was to work
out that the sex toy lit up when you turned it on, guiding you through dark areas) – and MK delivered death in pixels you could tile a bathroom with, today’s gore and groping comes with high-definition, almost cinema-quality graphics. IRL ones – that’s In Real Life, keep up at the back – are hardcore enough. Go on patrol in Call of Duty and you get to waste plenty of bad guys in new and adventurous ways with plenty of big and brutal weapons. But go offworld to the likes of God of War or the similarly monikered Gears of War – fantasy and sci-fi gorefests respectively – and you’ll really see some guts along with your glory. And you want scary as well as bloody? Dude, haven’t you seen Manhunt or Condemned? If you’re looking to make love, not war, there’s plenty of that about too. Some games give it to you full frontal – Catherine, for instance, brazenly sits on game shop shelves teasing off her pink Manga bra – but there are very few titles that don’t have a bit of gratuitous soft porn shoehorned in there somewhere. You’ll come across, if you’ll excuse the phrase, a bit of girl-on-alien action in Mass Effect, there’s a merry foursome waiting for you in the second Overlord and, hey, haven’t we all gone and got Nico laid in GTA when we got bored of gun-running? Oh, best of all, you don’t have to do all this on your own anymore, or wait for your mates to come on a play date – a game’s not a game without the ability to link up via the internet with other big boys and
girls who want to rip a zombie’s face off. And take that ‘y’don’t say’ look of your face – you wouldn’t believe the number of parents out there that won’t let their offspring have a laptop in their room but will pack it with Xboxes and PS3s in the misguided confidence that Peadobear23 and his friends can’t get to them that way. A strange delusion, when you consider these major players of grown-up gaming are available on all platforms, consoles and PC - but a common delusion, nonethess. Of course it’s not all about the sex and violence, I’ll give you that. There are still quite stunning driving games on the market and plenty left for the kids to have fun with. Mario lives on, as does little Link and his floaty fairies. The Wii is still the 21st century version of getting the Monopoly out on a rainy Sunday afternoon and, believe it or not, a lot of the educational software out there is both fun and a Good Thing for children. And we haven’t even scratched the surface with those multiplayer palavers - you know, World of Warcraft, Diablo and the like - all orks and goblins prancing around on winged ponies. Graphics, they say, aren’t the key there, it’s all about the “gameplay”. Each to their own and all that, but watch yourself – they’re hell addictive and can cause serious damage to your ability to get laid. In the immortal words of the exec in South Park: “Whoever this player is, he has played World of Warcraft nearly every hour of every day for the past year and a half. Gentlemen, we are dealing with someone here who . . . has absolutely no life.” Sound familiar?
om.au .c t e n la p y a d holi
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meredith falls
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south bound
big day out
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gig guide Rock-It Festival Sun 28 Oct WA Arena Joondalup, Perth
The Black Keys, The John Butler Trio, Birds of Tokyo, The Panics, Lanie Lane, Last Dinosaurs, San Cisco, Abbe May, Royal Headache, Graveyard Train, Brothers Grim, The Kill Devil Hills, The Toot Toot Toots, Emperors
Parklife Sat 29 Sep QLD Sun, 30 Sep NSW Mon, 1 Oct WA Sat, 6 Oct VIC Sun, 7 Oct SA
Passion Pit, Plan B, Nero live,Justice (DJ set), Tame Impala, Robyn,Chairlift, Chiddy Bang, Wiley, Hermitude, Parachute Youth,Rusko, Benga live, Citizens!,Charli XCX, St Lucia, DJ Fresh live, Jack Beats live,Modestep,Softwar (east coast), Alison Wonderland, Art Department, Lee Foss, Flume, Jacques Lu Cont, Labrinth, Rizzle Kicks, The Presets & more TBA www.parklife.com.au
This Is Nowhere Festival Sun,14 Oct
WA
Tortoise, Xiu Xiu, Grails, Beach Fossils, The Bank Holidays, HTRK, Puro Instinct, High Tea, Mayor Dadi, Chris Cobilis and more TBA www.thisisnowhere.com.au
Sydney Blues & Roots Festival
Thu, 25 Oct – Sun, 28 Oct
Harvest Festival Sun 11 November VIC Sat 17 November NSW Sun, 18 Nov QLD
Beck, Sigur Ros, Grizzly Bear, Mike Patton’s Mondo Cane, Ben Folds Five, Cake, Beirut, Santigold, The Dandy Warhols, Ozomatli, The Black Angels, The Chromatics, Fuck Buttons, The War on Drugs, Dark Dark Dark and more TBA
NSW
www.harvestfestival.com.au
The Angels, Ian Moss, Charlie Musselwhite (USA), Lanie Lane, Mia Dyson, Ray Beadle, The Trews (Canada), Captain Matchbox Whoopee Band, Backsliders, Chase The Sun, Joe Robinson, Jill Barber (Canada), Billy TK Junior.
Stereosonic
www.sydneybluesfestival.com.au
Sprung
Sat, 10 November QLD Hilltop Hoods, Illy, Pez, TZU, Vents, Kerser, Mantra, Spit Syndicate, Seth Sentry, Thundamentals, Bias B, Briggs, The Tongue, Evil Eddie, Mase N Mattic, Bam Bam, Seven, Deathstarrs, Dwizofoz, Kudos www.sprunghiphop.com.au
Sat, Nov 24
SYDNEY
Homebush 12pm-11pm
Sun, Nov 25
PERTH
Claremont Showground 12pm-10pm
Falls Festival
Big Day Out
TAS
NSW
Sat, 29 Dec – Tue, 1 Jan Fri, Sat 28 – Tue, 1 Jan
VIC
Beach House, Best Coast, Boy & Bear, Coolio, Sampology, SBTRKT, The Flaming Lips, The Vaccines, Bombay Bicycle Club, First Aid Kit, Hilltop Hoods, Hot Chip, Maximo Park, Millions, Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaurs www.fallsfestival.com
Soundwave 2013 Sat, February 23
Brisbane
Sun February 24
Sydney Fri, March 1
Melbourne Sat, March 2
Sat, Dec 1
Adelaide
Bonython Park 12pm-10pm
Perth
ADELAIDE Sat, Dec 1
MELBOURNE Melbourne Showgrounds 12pm-10pm
Sun, 2nd Dec
BRISBANE RNA Showgrounds 12pm -10pm
Tiësto // Avicii, Calvin Harris, Example, Carl Cox, Major Lazer Laidback Luke, Martin Solveig, Dash Berlin, Markus Schulz, Diplo*
Meredith Music Festival Fri, 7 Dec – Sun, 9 Dec
VIC
Line up not finalised www.mmf.com.au
Mon, March 4
Metallica, Linkin Park, Blink-182, A Perfect Circle, The Offspring, Paramore, Garbage, Tomahawk, Stone Sour, Kyuss Lives, Anthrax, Sum 41, Dragonforce, All Time Low, Flogging Molly, Ghost, Duff McKagan’s Loaded, Motion City Soundtrack, Lawrence Arms, Kingdom Of Sorrow, Fozzy Sleeping With Sirens, Cancer Bats www.soundwavefestival.com
Fri, 18 Jan
Sun, 20 Jan
QLD
Fri, 25 Jan
SA
Sat, 26 Jan
VIC
Mon, 28 Jan
WA
Red Hot Chili Peppers, The Killers, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Vampire Weekend, Band of Horses, Animal Collective, Against Me!, 360, Foals, B.O.B, Sleigh Bells, Jeff the Brotherhood, Off!, Jagwar Ma, Delta Spirit, Every Time I Die, House Vs Hurricane, Alabama Shakes, Childish Gambino, Logo, Death Grips, Adventure Club, Gary Clark Jr, The Bloody Beetroots, Kaskade, Crystal Castles, Pretty Lights, Nicky Romero, Morgan Page, Sampology and more TBA www.bigdayout.com
Southbound
Fri, 4 Jan – Sat, 5 Jan
WA
Totally Enormous Extinct Dinosaur, First Aid Kit, Hilltop Hoods, Hot Chip, Maximo Park, Millions, Beach House, Best Coast, Boy & Bear, Coolio, the Flaming Lips, SBTRKT, The Vaccines and more TBA www.southboundfestival.com.au
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reviews book of the month
To the Highlands- Jon Doust
New Release Adult Fiction Publisher Fremantle Press Pages 204 $27.99 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------This second offering from Western Australia’s Jon Doust tells the sweaty, boozy saga of a young man from the south west of WA crashing his way through the late sixties and a terrible career as a “Bank Johnny” in a colonial outpost somewhere in the South Pacific. Jack has no idea what do to with his life other than drink, dream about sex and try and maintain some control over the dreaded “lizard” that seems to run his life. You find out all about the lizard pretty quickly. It’s a pacy novel that forages through the tormented life of a young man trying to please himself, please his parents and please his lizard (are you getting the idea) as he stumbles and sometimes swaggers through the racist antiquated peak of the twentieth century in the middle of a jungle paradise inhabited by island prostitutes, local kings and way too many terminally bored “Bank Johnnies”. The book is partly tragic and partly humourous with Jack’s highly questionable behaviour making appearances on every other page. It’s got a sniff of Barry Humphries, the slightest hint of Graham Greene and just a dash of Frank McCourt as Doust traverses the humid stink of Jack’s world and the feckless, reckless, tumbling disaster that unfolds as he tries again and again to find a purpose to his privileged life. Jon Doust made a name for himself as the author of the much lauded Boy On a Wire (2009), the semi-autobiographical tale of Doust’s life growing up as a boarder in one of Perth’s most privileged private schools. It was a book which saw Doust long listed for the prestigious Miles Franklin award and this second offering follows a similar line as before, a must read for fans of the author’s earlier work.
49 ten of the best best martial arts movies with Adam Morris
movie of the month
The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2
KELLAN LUTZ and KRISTEN STEWART star in THE TWILIGHT SAGA: BREAKING DAWN-PART 2 Ph: Andrew Cooper, SMPSP © 2011 Summit Entertainment, LLC. All rights reserved.
Released: 15 november 2012
The arrival of Bella (Kristen Stewart) and Edward’s (Robert Pattinson) remarkable daughter, Renesmee, sets in motion a perilous chain of events that will pit the Cullens and their allies (that’s the werewolves mostly) against the Volturi, the fearsome council of vampire leaders who don’t much care for this new hybrid baby on the block. The stage will be set for an all-out battle between evil and er, not so evil. If you’re way too excited to see the final installment of the Twilight juggernaut, then we’ve got just thing. Here’s your chance to win a Twilight Prize pack, including a double pass to see The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 (in cinemas November 15), thanks to Hoyts Distribution.
Just answer this simple question: What’s the name of Kristen Stewart’s character in the Twilight saga? Is it: ● Della Crow ● Bella Swan ● Jane Smith
Send your answer, plus contact details to competitions@candymedia.com.au by October 31. One lucky winner will receive a Twilight Prize prize pack, including a double pass to see this latest instalment, thanks to Hoyts Distribution.
Drunken Master 2 Jackie Chan’s period comic masterpiece sees him summon the spirit of Charlie Chaplin and as much top shelf liquor as he can get his hands on. The premise is that Chan is a great fighter and a kind man but when he gets on the sauce, he transforms into a raging force of nature. The highlight fight is worth watching as Chan and an old geezer take on two hundred axe-wielding maniacs and actually making it look believable. Bloodsport Jean-Claude Van Damme stars in one of the all time classics of the genre where he goes to war in Hong Kong’s underground, taking on all manner of martial artists with his ballet inspired kickboxing. Highlights include a very young Forest Whitaker, monkey themed martial arts and one of the meanest baddies to ever take a beating on film. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon A near perfect sword-play and hand to hand epic, mixing the juiciness of some seriously graceful brawling with the class expected from master director, Ang Lee. Chow Yun Fat traded in his 9mm with John Woo to bring to life the warrior monk Li Mu Bai. When they start walking on water you have to remind yourself it’s only a film. Kill Bill A flute wielding David Carradine, Uma in a Bruce Lee vinyl onesie and Tarantino using the wire and stunt techniques of computer-less Hong Kong cinema. This double header is a few hours of kung fu pop madness and like all of QT’s greats, it’s like watching ten movies all at once. Enter the Dragon The Orson Welles of Martial Arts makes his masterpiece with this sizzler. Bruce Lee bleeds, sweats and howls his way through an onslaught of styles
reviews and psychos showcasing a dazzling array of skills along the way. It’s got the nunchucks and motorbikes. It’s even got Kareem Abdul ‘don’t touch my glasses’ Jabaar. Ghostdog-Way of the Samurai This is one of the few movies where the Samurai is a 150 kilo black man living in New York. He wanders the streets in silence doing mob hits for one of the five families and communicates through homing pigeon only. Forest Whitaker stars as the silent bushido master; this is Asian philosophy with corn rows. Kickboxer Van Damme delivers another classic at the height of his powers in this tale of revenge, brotherhood and superhuman shin conditioning. It has a spectacular training montage and a final fight which has J-CVD’s Ballet-fu in exquisite form. Fearless Hyena Here’s one of Jackie Chan’s first outings when he was making movies for the price of a bowl of wanton soup, and just like wanton soup, it’s outrageously awesome. Chan is out for revenge for the death of his master and employs four different martial arts styles based on emotions, anger, sorrow, happiness and joy. The villain is cruel and sadistic but gets his comeuppance through some of the weirdest fight scenes you’ll ever see. Above the Law Even for those who think the ponytailed one is a bit of a ham sandwich in the acting department, there’s no denying Steven Seagal’s first effort here is a gritty, ultra violent and refreshingly realistic outing compared to most of its contemporaries. Close combat Aikido in a leather jacket never looked so good. The Streetfighter Sonny Chiba stars in this iconic and sometimes demonic outing as a hired killer on the streets of 1970’s Tokyo. Chiba muscles his way through an army of miscreants with a mix of ancient combat skills and downright brutal street savagery. The only other Asian star at the time to hold a candle to Bruce Lee’s world domination.
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story:
Jude Jones photos: Getty Images
travel
shots in the dark
shots in the dark*
“If the train does not start moving soon, the driver will be shot” Joseph Stalin
If you’re lucky, she’ll pronounce it ‘wodka’. She will peer at you, suspicious, as she pours you a shot. Take it, drink it. Do not ask for coke. Or ice.
o not call her Olga - unless her name actually is Olga. Listen, learn and, above all, be respectful. She is your guide and, if you behave well, she will help you on your way to a travel experience that actually is worth talking about when you finally get your tired, broken feet back on the red dirt. That is the beauty of the Vodkatrain, a month’s rail trip through the heartland of old Russia, caressing the outskirts of Mongolia, reaching the tip of Northern India and taking in parts of Uzbekistan and Pakistan. Your guides on this odyssey are not the blue-blazered grinning chimps of corporate hospitality - they are people
D
who live in these hard, historic lands, people who know them, survive in them. And these lands are hard. Don’t you be trying any of your ‘doing it tough’ nonsense here, don’t you be whining about being an Aussie battler with your quarter-mill salary and Camaro in the double garage. When your grandfather was chasing skirt at barn dances in Bunbury, cities were beseiged in these lands, corpses lay in the streets, children starved and pensioners froze. Dozens of cultures were forced into a political union no one wanted, a union born through violence that shattered through violence. This part of the world has seen atrocities that would make the darkest parts of your internet browser look away, disgusted. It’s still kicking off - ask the
Georgians, if you don’t believe us. Hell, sit on a terrace at a Dynamo Kiev match if you want to see what real social tension looks like. So, yes. This isn’t your standard ‘adventure break’. This is a dose of hardnosed, brutal reality - a beautiful, hardnose reality, but one where you should be prepared to leave your comfort zone. Do it right and you’ll be treated as a local, by locals and see this battered, brave world built on bloodshed as it should be seen. There’s no itinerary, no real rules. Just don’t get on anyone’s wrong side and make sure you’re on the train before it pulls out. It won’t wait for you - and if you find yourself alone on that windswept platform, you’ll really realise that you’re not in Jindalee any more. ▶
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Pichugin Dmitry / Shutterstock.com
travel
ts
The Fac
three to four week tour can cost around $2000 (including visas) but you’ll want to sew in some spending money along the way. The tour options range from major cities such as St Petersburg and Moscow, where the cost of a bowl of borscht is comparable to the same dish back home in Northbridge/Brisbane, but equally you could also find yourself in rural Kazakhstan where a bag of fresh Baursaki will barely make a dent in your budget. As an average rule the folks at Vodkatrain
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suggest you bring around thirty to forty dollars a day for eats and treats. Sight seeing day trips and touristy options available all differ in cost from place to place too. For a Sherpa in Mongolia to take you up the side of a hill it may only cost a couple of dollars whereas a Chinamen showing you the secrets of the Orient on the outskirts of Tibet may be a little more pricey, but either way we’re still only talking about $10 for the upper end of these tours. If travelling to one of the least known outposts on the planet sounds like something
you might like to do you can organise it two ways; hit up your travel agent and tell them which abandoned outpost of the far east you want to start with, or – our advice contact the Vodkatrain people directly online and they’ll do it all for you. They’re happy to advise you on any trip and they pride themselves on having staff who have travelled every train and been to every stop along the routes offered, so you’re getting a shot of local knowledge before you even leave the country. Visit www.vodkatrain.com or visit your local travel agent for more details.
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Join a train ride on the Trans-Mongolian Railway system taking in parts of the planet previously only glimpsed at in old Kung Fu movies or Raiders of the Lost Ark’s opening sequence. drop in on Uzbekistan and Pakistan
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LEAVE THE DIRT IN THE MINE
It’s time to indulge...
ps d Tri ly a o R Five e slight ar that ter than bet erth the P bury n to Bu ss Bypa
Route 66, USA If you liked Thelma and Louise, go to Chicago, rent a Cadillac and peel through the desert with the top down taking in the grand scale beauty of the American West. Watch out for Grand Canyons and don’t pick up hitchhikers who look like Brad Pitt.
Grand Trunk Road, India and Afghanistan Don’t even think of bringing a Cadillac on this one. The Grand Trunk Road twists and turns through some of the most inhospitable countryside on earth. You’ll be sharing the road with army personnel, mule wagons and Afghani road trains. If you see Brad Pitt along this one with his shirt off, definitely give him a ride.
The Grossglockner Road, Austria Once the Austrians conquered the Alps on foot, they were hit with the urge to do the same in the motorcar and the result is perhaps the most breathtaking drive in the world at altitude (nearly 4000m above sea level). This is one of a kind driving, at least until the Tibetans get a similar inkling to lay down some bitumen.
Across the Paddock The Nullabor Plain is Australia’s rite of passage for any traveller intent on experiencing the heartland of our great nation. There aren’t too many highlights along the way but that’s kind of the point. Watch out for hairy nosed wombats, bleary eyed drivers and the folklore phantom road train which tears through the outback late at night - wide eyed truckies swear it’s true.
Okavango Delta, Botswana Yes it’s a river but it’s going to take a couple of days driving in a clapped out Overlander with no air-conditioner through the African wilderness to get you there. Once you arrive hop into a mokoro (basically an African gondola) and push yourself up the delta with a long pole taking care not to stick any crocodiles, hippos or African buffalos while you’re at it.
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travel
Welcome to the
Pleasuredome By Gabi Mills
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W
hen I was young, during the school holidays they’d show old Tarzan movies, those black and white epics starring Johnny Weismueller (did you know he was Romanian, by the way), Cheetah the chimp and Jane of course. The Africa imagined by Hollywood was a magical, legendary place, with tumbling waterfalls, elephants trumpeting through the undergrowth, and the constant threat that Johnny’s loincloth might slip from position. When I arrived at Sun City’s The Palace of the Lost City, I half expected to bump into Cheetah gnawing on a banana – this is Africa all right, but re-imagined in all its technicolour, unthreatening Hollywood glory. Everything is on an epic scale. As your car draws up to the entrance, a huge, lifesized fountain of prancing gazelles pursued by cheetahs leaps up to greet you. There is a mini version of the Victoria Falls on either side of the main building, like a constantly frothing moat, studded with rocks and the occasional dive bombing heron. As you check in, take a moment to look up. Be prepared to gawp. The dome above you is painted with a kaleidosopic display of Africa’s wildlife, such artistic exhuberance reflected in every soft furnishing, column, painting you’ll see.
And everywhere there are huge elephant tusks – tusks acting as cantilevers to support ceiling valuts, tusks entwining at the top of columns. A girl could get a little flustered with so many tusks at every turn. It’s a bit like walking through the Looking Glass, but in this case Alice is a confident showgirl with more than a touch of the drama queen about her. I was there for a couple of nights before tipping up at the huge Mining Indaba conference in Cape Town, so I had limited time, but lots of enthusiasm to extract the maximum from this fairytale two hours north of Jo’Burg. I knew exactly what I wanted to do: safari, explore, eat, experience. First of all I got to know my verging-on-the-giant bedroom, one of 338 in the hotel. There was a small note left for me on the table. Don’t, whatever you do, it said, be tempted to leave your balcony doors open. The definition of cheeky monkeys would have no hesitation in rifling through your knicker drawer should you turn your back for a second. Warning duly noted. There was a separate dressing room, a bath, plenty of wardrobe space, and a bed big enough to lose your pillows in overnight. Downstairs, the main restaurant, the ▶
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travel Crystal Court, dominates the main space. A double curved staircase, just asking for a starlet to make a grand entrance even at breakfast time, leads you down to the kind of place where waiters serve you in full regalia, flourishing napkins as you sit down. I turned up for afternoon tea and ate my fair share of the national debt – bijoux petit fours, sandwiches without their crusts, tarts and cakes, endless tea. I could have been a heroine in an Agatha Christie novel, just waiting to be called by Poirot to assemble in the library for the shocking reveal. I’ll save him the trouble. It was me. In the restaurant. With the cake fork. The hotel sits above the enormous Sun City complex which includes a huge, never closing casino, a whole resort with a beach and ‘sea’ (there are even surfable waves), a variety of other hotels for differing budgets, as well as a busy conference facility which, while I was there, was full of travel agents from Australia. When you’re in the Palace, however, you’re in a whole different world. You can stay remote and pampered there, or throw yourself into the many sensory temptations of what’s happening beyond the leaping gazelles at the gate. I chose the latter. The Pilansberg Game Reserve sits right next to the resort, a conveniently placed
ancient volcanic crater filled to the brim with relocated wildlife which otherwise would have been poached and lost forever. Catching an open topped safari truck with enough room for 12 or so guests, we trundled the short distance from the resort to the entrance of the game reserve. I was expecting to see animals previously only observed sitting morosely in zoos. I wasn’t expecting to see them just a few minutes into our three hour adventure. We’d been promised the Big 5 – lion, buffalo, rhino, elephant and leopard. Within two hours we’d seen four – the elusive leopard living up to its reputation. “We saw one in that tree over there yesterday,” said our garrulous guide. We all duly took a picture of an empty tree. It’s the third largest reserve in South Africa, and unlike other safari hotspots in Africa, has the added bonus of being malaria-free – a perfect choice if you’re bringing kids on this adventure of a lifetime. If I’d have had more time, I would have opted for the chance to self-drive around the park – there are over 200km of roads to explore. But if you haven’t got much time, then the guided game drive is perfect. I couldn’t believe how close we got to the animals – it felt as if we could reach out and touch the trunks of elephants, scratch
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the knees of giraffes, and – my favourite – have a mud bath or two with the many troupes of wart hogs who, I can confirm, are just as naturally idiotic as the Lion King’s Pumbaa would have us believe. We saw zebras, each one with slightly different stripe patterns, hippos wallowing in one of the huge waterholes and enough waterfowl to make twitchers convulse with joy. We began to leave the park as the sun started to dip behind the slopes of the ancient volcano, and spotted in the distance a hot air balloon, silently hanging above a family of elephant. It’s times like that, you say to yourself, this ain’t Kansas, Toto. After a mammoth (pun intended) breakfast (literally every taste is catered for, including a lolly counter for the kids to decorate their pancakes), I had arranged to visit the nearby ‘Cultural Village’. To be honest I had my doubts about this. I envisaged a kind of dumbed down, Africa-lite approach to this enormous continent’s cultural background. I couldn’t have been more wrong. Thanks to a hugely talented host, dressed in his tribe’s traditional Zulu gear, I was introduced to a selection of the area’s indigenous tribal customs, represented by locals dressed in various costumes, standing outside variously decorated huts. After I’d learned a few local
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travel phrases (and promptly forgot them of course), I sampled some freshly cooked mealy bugs, a kind of porridge and local hooch. Things were definitely looking up. Then, in a mini auditorium, all of the ‘tribal’ people performed amazing a capella singing, dancing and drumming. They seemed to genuinely love to entertain, their talent infectious to the point when I was invited to join in one of the dances, I had no hesitation in coming over all Paul Simon, and shaking my sorry, lumbering white ass. Generous with this clumsy, uncoordinated bird who kept missing the beat, Mr Zulu and his friends were sweet with their applause. A bonus is that the shop attached to the village has some really cool gear – so I stocked up before I left. Back at the resort, I flopped by the magnificent pool, gratefully accepting the offer of a foot massage from one of the mobile masseurs who pummel you into submission for a fee. I’d booked dinner at the hotel’s premium restaurant that night, the Villa del Palazzo, and get into a lively debate with the head chef and wine waiter who have carefully constructed a sumptuous seven course feast for me to enjoy. It’s a good example of how fantastically charming the staff are – everybody from the guy who sweeps the halls, to the lady bringing your gin and tonic are friendly, curious about where you’ve come from and brilliant ambassadors for their employers. If for no other reason, I would return to the Palace to be surrounded by the staff’s warmth once again. On my final morning I took a leisurely wander around the resort below, stumbling across so many potential fun things to do, I wished I had another week or two to do so. There was a bridge to the casino which, every 15 minutes, would rattle and shake as if an earthquake was happening. There was a mini train, perfect for Thomas the Tank Engine lovers, taking littlies along a cute single guage line. There was a tournament standard golf course which had hosted international events, a lake with jetskiers and paragliders zooming around, and the casino itself – cavernous, seductive, throbbing with the rustle of Rand passing through the fingers of all those who visited. All dreams come to an end – and although my African version sometimes verged on delirium, I’m comforted by the fact that in a corner of South Africa, the jungle drums are beating for me.
Sun City: The Palace
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The Cascades
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The Cabanas
3* Deluxe
Entry Level Family Room
$284 $323 AUD*
Cutural Village: Showtimes: 10h30/11h30/14h30/15h30/16h30 Entrance fee: R115.00 - $13.25 AUD* for adults R60.00 - $6.90 AUD* for children Includes: Guided Village Tours - Cultural performances including tribal dancing - Sangoma - After the tours guests can explore the Curio Shop which sells a variety of local African crafts and art There is also a Village Boma for cultural theme evenings (conference and incentive groups) and a Shebeen which offers authentic South African cuisine, a trendy pub and vibrant music in a relaxed atmosphere. * current exchange rate as of 24/07/2012
Working hard? Enjoy a beach break or a long-haul holiday.
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1300 653 255 flightcentre.com.au ▼ Applies to genuine Appl gen quotes from airlines and Australian registered businesses and websites for travel that originates/departs from Australia. Quote must be in writing and must be presented to us prior to booking. Fare must be available and able to be booked by the general public when you bring it to us. Fares available due to membership of a group or corporate entity or subscription to a closed group are excluded. Must be for same dates and flight class. We will beat price by $1.00 and give you a $20 voucher. For full terms and conditions see flightcentre.com.au. *Travel restrictions and conditions apply. Please ask us for further details. Prices and taxes are correct as at 6 Aug 12 and are subject to change without notice. Updates and corrections to advertised products including pricing may be found at flightcentre.com.au/ads. Prices quoted are on sale until 31 Oct 12 unless otherwise stated or sold out prior. Prices are per person and are subject to availability. Accommodation (if included) is based on twin share. Seasonal surcharges and blackout dates may apply depending on date of travel. Prices shown are fully inclusive of taxes, levies, government charges and other applicable fees. Flights not included unless otherwise stated. Where flight is included, additional taxes specific to your flight routing may apply and/or may not include checked luggage (which can incur additional charges). Payments made by credit card will incur a surcharge. Prices shown are for payments made by cash in store. Advertised price includes any bonus nights. Minimum/maximum stay restrictions may apply. FROM PERTH. Flight Centre Limited (ABN 25 003 377 188) trading as Flight Centre. Licence No. 9TA 589. rcm_sep_fullpage_fc
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travel
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friendship and the joy of being out on the water. After leaving our historic and vibrant Port of Fremantle and enjoying a great sail up the coast and across to Bali, you end up in yet another paradise. It’s an unforgettable adventure,” he said. There’s no need to worry if you’re boat is not in the super yacht class – the race embraces all comers. You don’t even need to own your own yacht yet, as there are options to join the race as a much needed crew member, earning your stripes as you pull your weight on board one of the
racing boats. “The race is open to all kinds of boats, of all sizes, and is generally an easy sail, so we’d love to see as many boats as possible taking part,” said Bob. And if sailing up the long WA coast to Bali leaves you gagging for more seasalt in your hair, it’s been announced that following the gala presentation party night in Bali, a Beyond Bali cruise has been organised, designed by experienced yachtsmen who know the region well. The new addition of an extra cruise means that boats can explore the 17,000 odd islands making up the Indonesian archipelago in company, knowing that the arranged stopovers and visits offer a glimpse of the real Indonesia away from the tourist trail, with the added bonus of a return route via the stunning Kimberley coast. “While some yachts will still elect to return directly to Fremantle, the experience gained in 2011clearly showed that most would welcome an organised cruise home,“ said Bernie Kaaks, event media director.
It is anticipated that many will take the opportunity to fly friends and relations to Bali to join them, either in addition to the Fremantle to Bali crew or as a replacement for those who may have less time available. Organisers said that crews heading back to Fremantle would feel cheated if they failed to explore the Kimberley coastline with its towering cliffs, awesome waterfalls and huge tides, so the itinerary includes a number of Kimberley stopovers. “There are many Bali capable yachts in our State’s marinas and boat owners are encouraged to get involved in this unique sailing experience. “Organised information evenings covering items like customs procedures, safety, navigation, weather and so on, make the whole process easy for boat owners,” said Bernie. “I urge you to live the dream by coming along to the presentation and by signing up to be a part of this memorable event.” For your chance to become a part of the Wonderful Indonesia Fremantle to Bali Race & Rally presented by Fremantle Sailing Club, view the Beyond Bali itinerary or sign up on the crew register, visit the website www.fremantlebali.com or contact Bernie Kaaks, media director for the event on 0412 532 211 or bernie@fremantlebali.com
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Top Sailing
Races of the World
TREME R OF THE X E W O P G IN STOPP UR LIFE RIDE OF YO THE HEART XPERIENCE OU’RE TAKEN ON THE NES OF LANCELIN! Y D DU BUGGY AS CULAR SAN TRALIA A T C E P S E H IND IN AUS THROUGH T E ONLY RIDE OF ITS K THIS IS TH
Rolex Sydney Hobart Yacht Race 26 December 2012 The iconic race has been slicing through the choppy waters between the Harbour City and Tassie for the past 67 years, creating as much drama in the water as Derby Day does on the turf. Arguably the most media-friendly and watched yacht race in the world, the race has influenced the sport way beyond just providing yachting eye candy for sailing enthusiasts. It’s changed sea safety regulations and groomed future stars to go on to victories in the world’s other great yachting challenges. The race will kick off on Boxing Day, steering a path through the waters of Sydney Harbour, the Tasman Sea, Storm Bay and the Derwent River. Over the past 67 years, the race has become an mainstay of Australia’s summer sport, ranking in public interest with such national events as the Melbourne Cup horse race, the Davis Cup tennis and the cricket tests between Australia and England. The club’s members have also fared well in major ocean racing events overseas, with victories in the Admiral’s Cup, Kenwood Cup, One Ton Cup, the Fastnet Race and the BOC Challenge solo race around the word, not to mention the America’s Cup. Will Bob Oatley’s Wild Oats XI, the race record holder, scoop top honours again before 2013 begins? They’ll need to average 14.7 knots to do so – ‘easily achievable in the right conditions,’ according to the skipper, Mark Richards. Whatever happens, the nation will be watching, slightly hung over and holding a mince pie, just after Christmas Day.
Rolex Fastnet Race, England 11 August 2013 Those Pommie Bastards aren’t bad at sailing – just ask the Spanish who in 1588 watched aghast as their carefully planned Armada sank beneath the waves. In 2011, the Rolex Fastnet Race had a record fleet of 320 yachts battling it out on the 608 nautical mile non-stop race between the south coast of England, down to the Fastnet Rock in a particularly choppy bit of the Atlantic Ocean, before racing back to Plymouth. In 2013 it’s expected the four day race in August will attract the usual motley collection of high class trimarans - the largest in 2011 was 140ft (Maxi Banque Populaire) – down to 30ft minnows with just two crew. Tally ho!
Volvo Ocean Race Next race scheduled for 2014 Legend has it that this amazingly tough sea challenge - created to follow in the backwash of the route of the old square riggers around the world - began over a beer in Portsmouth, UK almost four decades ago. From relatively amateurish beginnings in 1973 with 17 boats carrying 167 sailors, the race is now crewed by Olympic champions, with yachts sponsored for millions by top brands. A global audience of 1.3 billion watched the 2008 race and the 2011/2012 race had sailors from 15 nations and six Open 70s. This year’s race was won by Groupama, skippered by 39 year old Franck Cammas. Think you’re tough enough to follow in Franck’s footsteps? Better start practicing those reef knots…
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It is such a unique race. It’s hard, it’s demanding, it’s exciting and it’s a race that most people want to challenge at least once in their life Terry Bolland Avon Descent legend
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t started almost in secret forty years ago when a group of extreme enthusiasts got together for a river race with no officials, no checkpoints and no rules. It has since become an institution on the local, national and now international sporting scene and for many men in Western Australia, it has become a rite of passage. One of the all-time legends of the Avon Descent, Terry Bolland, who’s been down the gruelling 124 km stretch more than twenty times, placed twice in the top three, ranks the race as one of the best in the world. He has since become the unofficial ambassador of the Avon, heading the safety briefs and training seminars competitors sign up for, before they hit the rapids. “I’ve been paddling all over the world, including trekking the entire length of the mighty Mississippi,” says Terry, “but WA’s Avon is something entirely distinctive to river systems around the world with its own peculiar charms and challenges. “It is so different to rivers in other countries. “We have a lot more trees growing in the river which makes it quite hazardous. The
rapids are not as big as some of the major rivers overseas, but they are very tricky.” Although it’s rarely brought up in the promotional material, it’s clear that there are real dangers in the Avon Descent. The race actually covers more than half of the Avon River and takes competitors and increasingly, spectators, through some of Western Australia’s most breathtaking countryside. The event is a unique time trial race,covering extremely diverse and dangerous territory over the two days of competition. But unusually it also has paddlers competing alongside power boat riders which can be seen tearing along the course at speeds up to 70 kms per hour. It begins at the main Northam Pool on the Avon River which happens to be the only permanent stretch of natural inland water along the entire Great Eastern Highway between Perth and Adelaide. From there, paddlers and power boaters travel down through the historical farming regions of Northam and Toodyay, dense national parks, gorges, the Swan Valley vineyard region and eventually, into the tidal waters of the upper Swan River. The last leg of the race includes a torturous 30km flat water paddle marathon which is said to test the will and endurance of the highest level athletes competing in the event. Of course if you’re hooning up the river at 70 clicks in a power boat this is one of the best parts of the second day. “There’s big prize money now for the top competitors,” says Terry, “$15 000 for the winner of the open paddlers, but not a lot goes to the hundreds of amateurs who compete every year. “They’re the ones that really keep the event going” If you think you have what it takes to master WA’s toughest white water endurance test in 2013 head to www.avondescent.com and get ready for the first weekend in August to be one you’ll never, ever forget. Alternatively if you’re new to the paddling game and just want to learn the basics head to www.canoeingdownunder.com.au
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Nicki Letts
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ARE YOU TOUGH ENOUGH.. . FOR MUD ?
t’s times lik e these yo u’ll remem you signe ber d a death it’s the firs waiver. t time we’v Those wo rds will ri e ventured In the wo ng in you outside A a five-me rld of end r ears as merica.” tre plunge urance eve a y y o o u u n lo g off a ricke o g k cold mud u nts, Tough n to . w C a o rds an n ty platform ce d iv y Mudder is e la d ke b ex-triatho y Brit Will below. La words ag into the lon nut w ter you’ll Dean in 2 ain as yo ho claime everyday remembe u run thro 009, and face d to be ‘b challen r those ugh the final h ored’ by su urdle, a ta a trench of blazing From 20,0 ges, its popularity ch If this is y ngle of ele straw, has surge 00 partic ou, then y d since th the numb ctrified fe ipants acr ou’re taki Tough Mu er jumped en. nces. oss three ng part in dder, the events in to 140,00 Organise newest en to reach A 2010, 0 across 1 rs are anti durance ch ustralian 4 ci e p ve ating 400 with 35 e allenge nts in 201 shores this Self-procl vents acro ,000 part 1. year. aimed as icipants in ss the US, The enorm event on th ‘probably U 2012 K , o C u s demand anada an the tough e planet’, already co d Australia in Australia est Tough Mu race – it’s mmitted to . means the dder is no an obstacl events in y have t just a e course o Tough Mu P Teams ne e rt h d n steroids. a d n e d r gotiate a m B ri ig sb h it’s more th t feel like ane in 20 grueling 2 complete a race or 13. an that, sa with 28 m 0-kilometr competitio ys Jane; it reinforced ilitary-sty e trail run the British n but is a a le t e re challenge ve lig Special Fo ry io o n p fo p ortunity b s designe r tough nu “This is no rces (yes, test streng d by y mantras ts, that’s righ t a race, b th, stamin and war Jane. “It is t – the SA ut a challe a, mental cries. There are S n ) n o g g to t ri e a t ,” b a o n sa u u d t y n ca y s d o is e maraderi ur time an rwater tun about push pools and e. d ‘first pla nels, walls ing yours a field of ce’. It of mud, ic elf to the and menta live wires up to 10,0 limits, phy y lly , e a m nd facing itting shock 00 volts … sically your fears There are did some s o f It’s hard to body say head on.” imagine w no prize m no time splits at To ‘fun’? themselve hy anyon ugh Mudd oney. Inst s through e w er, and e o a u p d ld re every vict this, but p pay to pu sented wit of life are orious Mu eople from t h a t-shirt, lining up dder is Mudder b every wa a to give it ca 21,000 p n of VB and adge of h lk a shot. A eople too the Tough onour – a whopping k part in th The ultima Phillip Isla n o ra nge head e debut e te reward nd near M band. vent on tattoo. Tou however elbourne this year gh Mudd is the Tou at the end and they e gh Mudd r cl h o a a w f ims more ve been b ere suppo March 10,000 b er than 1,00 randed w rted by m loodthirst ith the Tou 0 particip date. But ore than y spectato will travel ants despite de gh Mudd rs. Thousa to the Syd er tattoo to feating fla nds more shocks, th ney event mes, ice a “We have is is one ch in S e n p d te b e e a mber. lectric en blown llenge the Mudders Australia,” away by don’t wan Australian says Jane the success t to take o Tough Think tria Di Leo, To n in . “Melbourn N o t today an thlons are ugh Mudd e is the big for the yway. for wimps? er spo gest even 2013 To Pre-regis t we’ve eve kesperson. Aus u g h ter M udders in tralia, B r had, an risbane, d Western at www Sydney .toughm or Melb udder.c ourne om.au
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The Mud Pack doing it tough
On a perfect sunny day on Phillip Island, adrenalin and testosterone (from men and women alike) is at full force when everyone recites the Tough Mudder Pledge at the start line, before launching themselves into the ‘Braveheart Charge’, hollering battle cries like Mel Gibson, before it all hit the fan. The Mad Mudder Farkers are one of the mixed teams who charge into the inaugural Australian Tough Mudder. They represent a stereotypical Tough Mudder team, with a mix of males and females ages between 20 and 40. Typically, about 80 per cent of competitors are male, but women have proved as successful as men and even people aged over 80 have completed the course. “We heard about it through some friends and thought it would be a great goal to aim for, taking us out of our comfort zone and motivating us all to get out of bed and hit the gym each morning,” says Christie Lonergan, 29. But it’s not like you can find these obstacles in your local gym, so how exactly do you train for Tough Mudder? In order to prepare themselves for the event, Christie and her team of eight tough blokes and brave babes started training in December last year. “We’d rotate interval training, circuit training, upper body weights, and body weight training – all for an extended period of time as we knew
we’d be out there for over two hours,” she says. Back on Phillip Island, the training is being put into good use as the team pushes and pulls their mud-caked bodies from one obstacle to the next, each seemingly designed to get them muddier than the last. Belly-crawling through muck below barbed wire (Kiss of Mud) and shimmying through a corrugated tube filled with wet gravel (the Boa Constrictor), they are all having a blast. Sweat, determination and good old-fashioned camaraderie fill the air. On one obstacle they meet some tutu-clad Mudders in need of a hand (the tutus are no match for the barbed wire at the next hurdle), and joke with a 14-strong army of Vikings who get their horned helmets caught in any obstacle involving rope. For the Mad Mudder Farkers, the most important thing is getting through the ordeal together. They know they will only be able to overcome obstacles like the Ball Shrinker (a rickety rope bridge) and Berlin Walls (three-metre high walls) if they show strength as a unit. “The best part of the whole experience is doing it together. If we fall, we fall together,” Christie laughs. It's this pervading sense of camaraderie which sets Tough Mudder apart. Everywhere, muddy hands grasp muddy hands, or whatever body part they can get a firm grip on, to drag their
teammates through. Shouts of encouragement are bellowed as Mudders clamber through the rope nets and tumble over the giant hay bales. Human ladders become the only way to defeat the mud hills. One team strips off their shirts to form a rope to pull themselves up Everest, the impossibly slippery giant quarter-pipe that stands between them and a cold VB at the finishing line. More weary bodies, not up to the climb, creep past Everest to a shameful chorus of ‘boos’. Tough Mudder aims to replace the Ironman as the ultimate endurance event on the planet. But when it comes to physical endurance, it’s hardly a fair comparison. Mat Vaughan, 35, was there to see his mates cross the finishing line – mates who usually compete in ‘serious’ triathlon events. “Here, everyone crosses the line looking tired and mucky, but not physically exhausted. It doesn’t compare to watching Ironman competitors fall across the finish line, unable to muster the energy to move another metre.” Even the freshly crowned Tough Mudders, the Mad Mudder Farkers, agree that with a reasonable level of fitness, anyone could complete the Tough Mudder with only a few aches and pains; nothing that a hot shower and a couple of beers can’t fix.
67 Life getting a bit boring? Need some adrenaline, heartpumping, action-packed fun? You’ve come to the right place! Here you will find a range of activities to get the blood pumping, just pick one (if you can limit yourself) and be on your way for an experience you won’t forget
RC’S GUIDE TO TOUGH MUDDER OBSTACLES
Everest You’ll need help from your fellow Mudders to reach the top of this slippery giant quarter pipe.
Ball Shrinker Try not to fall off this rickety, swinging rope bridge into the muddy waters below.
Kiss of Mud Eat dirt as you crawl on your belly under wire set only 20 centimetres from the ground.
Electroshock Therapy Release your inner demons as you sprint through a field of live wires, some of which carry a 10,000-volt shock.
Fire Walker Plain and simple run through some blazing, diesel-soaked straw. Expect flames at least 1.2 metres high.
V8 DRIVES - SKYDIVING - GO KARTING WILDLIFE ENCOUNTERS - DEEP SEA FISHING HARLEY DAVIDSON RIDES RALLY CARS - MOUNTAIN BIKE TOURS PERFECT GIFT FOR FATHERS DAY Phone: 08 9361 3055 Email: info@thrillseekerswa.com.au
WWW.THRILLSEEKERSWA.COM.AU
from left: manzrussali / Shutterstock.com
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Australian cricket actions during the final of their tri-nations cricket series against the West Indies in Kuala Lumpur
cjmac / Shutterstock.com
SEPANG, MALAYSIA - APRIL 4: Spanish Fernando Alonso of Team Ferrari pitting for tires at the Petronas Formula 1 Grand Prix April 4, 2010 in Sepang, Malaysia
sport
craig hill / Shutterstock.com
Marcus Ambrose australian V8 supercar
SPORT EVENTS Cricket T20 World Cup Sri Lanka
Australia kicks off its campaign on Wednesday September 19, taking on those mighty cricketing giants, Ireland at the R Premadasa Stadium in Colombo. New Zealand go up against Bangladesh on September 21 at the Pallekele International Cricket Stadium. Dates: 18 September to 7 October
2013 Ashes Will it be Australia’s turn to hold the tiniest trophy in sport? Not if those pesky Poms have anything to do with it. The first test kicks off on 10 July at Trent Bridge, and wraps up at The Oval on 25 August. Dates: 10 July to 25 August
Motor Sport Formula One
2012 V8 Supercars
The race for the title hots up as the remaining eight races of the 2012 season roar towards a climax in Sao Paolo, Brazil.
This is the season that’s seen TeamVodafone and Ford Performance dominate the field, and with six races to go, it’ll be head to head for Jamie Whincup and Mark Winterbottom, the current top two on the leaderboard.
Gran Premio Santander D’Italia Monza - 7 to 9 September Singtel Singapore Grand Prix Singapore - 21 to 23 September Japanese Grand Prix Suzuka - 5 to 7 October Korean Grand Prix Yeongam - 12 to 14 October Airtel Indian Grand Prix New Delhi - 26 to 28 October Etihad Airways Abu Dhabi Grand Prix Yas Marina - 2 to 4 November United States Grand Prix Austin - 16 to 18 November Grande Premio Petrobras Do Brasil São Paolo - 23 to 25 November
Dick Smith Sandown 500 14 to 16 September Supercheap Auto Bathurst 1000 4 to 7 October Armor All Gold Coast 600 19 to 21 October Yas V8 400 2 to 4 November Winton Motor Raceway 16 to 18 November Sydney Telstra 500 30 November to 2 December
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Rugby The British and Irish Lions Tour to Australia 2013 It’s the turn of Australia (via Hong Kong) to host the four yearly rugby event and Warren Gatland’s Wallaby team is gearing up for a humdinger of a tournament. In 2001 there were almost 10,000 supporters who travelled to Australia on official tour packages alone and in 2005, 30,000 joined local fans in New Zealand. So who will claim the Tom Richards Trophy, named after the only player in history to have represented both the Wallabies and Lions? The smart money says it’s time the Wallabies redressed the match inbalance and added a win to their total tally so far of four, to the Lions’ nine series win.
1 June Barbarians v British and Irish Lions, Hong Kong 5 June Western Force v British and Irish Lions, Perth 8 June Queensland Reds v British and Irish Lions, Brisbane 12 June Comb NSW-Queensland Country v British and Irish Lions, Newcastle 15 June NSW Waratahs v British and Irish Lions, Sydney 18 June ACT Brumbies v British and Irish Lions, Canberra 22 June Australia v British and Irish Lions, Brisbane 25 June Melbourne Rebels v British and Irish Lions 29 June Australia v British and Irish Lions, Melbourne 6 July Australia v British and Irish Lions, Sydney
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health
Heath's helpline In the first of our new series of mental health columns coupled with expert advice, Heath Black discusses his battle to get a correct diagnosis – and the correct medication – during the roller coaster years surrounding his very public battle with anxiety, depression and other mental health issues.
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health
There are probably lots of people in jail thanks to misdiagnosis and the wrong medication being given ...
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It was 2006, and after going on the Beyond Blue website, I realised that the way I was feeling ticked a lot of the boxes to do with depression and anxiety. So I went to my local GP, touched base with him, and within 15 minutes, I was walking out with a script which actually made my underlying condition – ADHD type 6 and Bi Polar type 2 – far, far worse. The two years which followed were filled with an awful lot of indiscretions, actions which I may still have taken but I feel were exacerbated by that medication. So in 2008, knowing something wasn’t right, I went to see a psychiatrist who did his best to pursue the correct diagnosis. I’d done some more research on the internet, and, knowing that I had bi-polar relatives, wondered if that might be the answer. The psychiatrist agreed, and after 45 minutes this time, once again I was leaving with another set of meds. I asked myself whether 45 minutes was long enough to make that kind of decision but you tend to put yourself in the hands of the medical profession and I needed to trust their decision. Because of my experience, it has occurred to me that there are probably lots
of people in jail thanks to misdiagnosis and the wrong medication being given – and I was lucky I didn’t end up there too. Once again, after a little while I knew things were still not right and then serendipity stepped in. I was the keynote speaker at the Men in Black Ball in 2011 and by chance there was a doctor in the audience who didn’t put me in the too hard basket. By now I was seriously worried about what I might do to my family and the community at large if my symptoms continued to escalate – the meds were probably working at a level of 60%, but that 40% left untreated was terrifying me. I was sure I was on the verge of returning to manic episodes so when the doctor suggested he could help me, he didn’t have to ask twice. We sat for an hour and a half, going through my family background and history, and completing a mind screen, which in itself took 50 minutes. More consultations followed and then we decided to try something out of the square – a brain scan. They injected dye into my arm, and scanned my brain while I was relaxed, and
while I was completing simple puzzles. The dye showed up that there was bi polar clearly present in my frontal lobes and then ADHD lit up like a Christmas tree too. I cried when I saw that – for the first time in six years, I finally had a correct diagnosis. The missing piece of the jigsaw puzzle was finally there. Immediately my meds were changed and it made a huge, almost instantaneous difference. Within four hours I was a new man – I could play Uno, could watch a movie all the way through, I could play footy without becoming anxious. I guess thanks in part to my particular condition, in a way it helped me search for answers – I wouldn’t stop researching and asking and pushing to get the right diagnosis, but I know for some people it won’t be like that for them. The amount of feedback I’ve had on Facebook from people who’ve read my book makes me sure that they need to be encouraged to always pursue their own wellness. Ask questions. Do your own research. Challenge if you think you’re being told the wrong thing, and think outside the square – it might just save your life.”
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What the experts say...
health
T
he story told by Heath is not an uncommon one especially with men. As a Psychologist I am regularly encountering guys who have been misdiagnosed, poorly managed or told to "get over it" from their treating GP. For most of us, we only go to the doctor when the symptoms we are experiencing are pretty bad and then all we want is to get the "issue" sorted and move on. The misdiagnosis problem is compounded when we're dealing with our own mental health, due to mental health stigma and our own lack of understanding of what is going on for us. Admitting to a GP or health professional that we have a mental health issue is pretty nerve wracking and takes a lot of guts. So by the time we get to the GP sometimes we edit the full impact of our symptoms, or we rush through it so we can get out of there. Some GP's are just as nervous about discussing mental health issues with their patients as well. I have seen this trend a lot more in the older GP's as they may not be totally aware of the best treatments or unsure how to address the concerns your raising with them. For anyone reading this who may have been misdiagnosed or poorly supported in the health system you will be familiar with the
self-doubt that gnaws away at you, especially when you have the feeling that "all is not well". Misdiagnoses can often compound the original issue and can prevent you from seeking further treatment. We also know that early diagnosis and treatment of any illness improves the recovery time and improves treatment outcomes. So in essence early and correct diagnosis is the most essential factor! There are plenty of reasons why we don't get the best support but rather than worry about why it occurs let's focus on what YOU can do to get the best treatment and improve your quality of life. So what can YOU do to make sure you get the right diagnosis, treatment and support? Here are five easy steps: 1. Seek early and regular medical advice: Don't leave mental health issues to fester and become huge problems. Always go back for your check ups. 2. Be direct with your GP. Tell them of your symptoms and ask them: - What is the problem (diagnosis), - What are my options (treatments) and - When will I get better (prognosis). 3. Always ask to see a specialist (psychologist and psychiatrist) in addition to seeing you GP.
4. Be informed and do your own research (internet, health hotlines, talk to trusted mates/family). 5. Always take control of your treatment and get a second opinion if treatment is not working. A lot of people feel as if they can't or shouldn't question their GP. Just remember GPs are there to treat you and you are paying them for a service. At the end of the day your health should be your top priority, don't settle for second best or it may just cost you more than you bargained for. If you have any questions or need any advice please shoot me an email and I'll be glad to help. info@ criticalcomponents.com.au
Joshua Hawes principal Psychologist at Critical Components
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steak sandwich the ultimate
Officially no 1 seller of Guinness in Australia
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eat. We all love it*. We'll have it for Sunday roast, or peeled off a tree trunk sized kebab stack in apple core-like strips and stuffed in a pitta pocket after too many jars on Saturday night. But perhaps the best way to get your hit of bloody protein-heavy nourishment is in a steak sandwich. Not just any steak sandwich, mind. But the ultimate Rock Candy steak sandwich. Let's not be under any illusions, people. A steak sandwich is a sacred thing.
Done well, it's the perfect hole-filler. Done badly, and you're in a whole world of pain: soggy bread, chewy, tasteless, cold meat, flaccid onions, warm, brown cornered lettuce. So despite its apparent simplicity – bread, meat, salad - a lot of things can go wrong. So what’s the secret? My first port of call was Ryan’s Quality Meats in Jandakot, exclusive butcher for none other than Amelia Parks' beef – WA’s premium brand. This beef, grown exclusively on a farm in the Great Southern, has to tick
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Kara Harris
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Perfect: The Rockpool's steak sandwich - control that drool, people.
a lot of boxes before it gets from paddock to plate. The cattle are grain fed, the beef's weight, fat-depth and age are all regulated with militant precision - believe me; these people care about their steak. According to manager Chris Artemis, there are two ideally suited cuts for the ultimate steak sandwich: tenderised rump cap (top part of the rump), and the scotch fillet (from the fore quarter)– both cut to a max of 1cm-thick. “We cut all the fat off the rump cap and run it through the tenderiser. It’s cheaper than the scotch fillet and has less fat. But if you don’t mind a little fat here
and there – go the scotch fillet route.” Sirloin is acceptable too, although can be a little “grainy” says Chris. Whatever you do, don’t go for tough cuts like blade or chuck, or you’ll be chewing on it for days. Perfect cut selected, the next question is: how should it be cooked? “No more than medium. You should never have a well done steak. It’s like torture.” Chris is laughing but don't underestimate his disgust at the concept of well-done steak. You might as well be a vegetarian if that's the way you like it in his eyes. Next in my quest for the ultimate steak sarnie was the restaurant that took
every sandgroping carnivore by storm when it opened in Perth in 2011: the Rockpool Bar & Grill, Burswood. Like pretty much all the meat there, the steak sandwich (only on the afternoon menu) is all about putting the produce first, without too much fannying around in the cooking department. There are a few simple rules of thumb to cooking a great steak, says head chef Dan Masters whoyou just shouldn't mess with prime beef. “We have the most amazing beef in the country, and to marinate it takes away from its natural beauty,” he says. ▶
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food As in so much of life, It seems the secret is to keep it simple: use quality beef, cook it to perfection and finish the whole package off with a bit of salad and sauce. “Add a relish – like chilli tomato or a red onion marmalade, on a
nicely toasted baguette, some fresh sliced tomato, barbecued onions and crisp iceberg lettuce,” Dan says. Sounds pretty good to me.
RIB EYE FILLET STEAK
*unless you're a tofu-loving hippy, obviously.
Dan's top tips: step one step two step three step four
Prepare. Remove the steak from the fridge at least 15 minutes before you cook it, it has to be room temperature. Season. With good sea salt and nothing else. RUMP STEAKE
Be patient. Rest it for at least as long as you cooked it. Don’t over cook. Dan likes his medium-rare but “not everyone does” - medium is fine too.
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food
How do you have yours? Chris Artemis,
Dan Masters,
Ryan’s Quality Meats
Steak: Scotch fillet,
Bread: Turkish,
Cooked: Medium
Cheese: Swiss, melted.
How: “Barbecue, grill-pan,
Sauce: Aioli and a
fry-pan… I don’t
Salad: Lettuce
no more than 1cm-thick
really mind”.
toasted.
tomato or beetroot relish.
and tomato.
Rockpool Bar & Grill
Steak: Sirloin (less
Bread: Crusty
Cooked:
Sauce: Chilli tomato relish, beetroot pickles or red onion marmalade.
than 1cm thick, pound with a meat mallet)
Medium-rare
How: “Has to be over an open fire”.
baguette, toasted.
Salad: Iceberg lettuce, tomato, barbecued onions.
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RC: How long have you been fishing? HW: I’ve been fishing as long as I can remember. Back in the day we only had footy, cricket, hunting and fishing. Weren’t too many fat kids around in those days. RC: What sparked your passion for the sport? HW: If you’re referring to the competition side of fishing I just think it was a progression from my guiding. I figured it was a good way to test my skills against other anglers and maybe prove myself. As for recreational fishing, I think it’s in my genes to hunt and fish. I like the challenge of outsmarting an animal in its own environment. RC: What are some of the best spots for fishing you’ve visited in Australia? HW: Everyone likes Northern Australia as a fishing destination with its big angry fish - and lots of them. Weipa area is great, the impoundments of the east coast are great for barra and bass, and then there’s the New England cod waters. RC:You’re based in Queensland - where do you go the most and what's your favourite local catch? HW: I’m based in a small town west of Brisbane. I don’t like crowds, traffic and everything else that goes with cities. Locally in freshwater I like targeting bass on surface lures in Maroon Dam. Moogerah Dam is also close to me and I do a lot of research in that dam with deep techniques. Both these dams are really different in the way they fish so it gives me lots of options. I also target big threadfin salmon, mullaway and snapper in the Brisbane river and Morton Bay using Maskvibes and Transams most of the time. RC: What’s your favourite spot (or type of spot if you think you might give a secret location away) for catching your favourite species of fish? HW: I don’t think I have a favourite fish to catch really. I’m like most people, I just like catching fish and sometimes I don’t care what or how big they may be. I love catching barra on jerkbaits, Murray cod and bass on surface lures, saltwater fish on Transams but I can just as easy spend a couple of hours with a light rod catching carp on corn or worms on a creek bank somewhere. RC: What’s the best way to land a bass? HW: There are a thousand scenarios of bass fishing depending on water levels, water types, season and even down to the area you are fishing. If I was going to Somerset Dam in August for example I reckon I could take three outfits to catch some bass. Sometimes the fish there are on the shallow banks so I take a 783 crankbait G-loomis rod with a Shimano 6-1 baitsast reel on it with say 10lb braid and 12lb leader. I’d tie a TN60 silent on in Ghost wakasagi colour. That setup will catch any bass I come across early in the morning most times. I’d also take a G-Loomis P8400 spin rod and 2500 reel with 6 or 8lb braid and 12lb leader with a Maskvibe60 on it for later on or if the fish are in deeper water. The third outfit would be lighter to fish a small blade or ice jig if the bass were a bit touchy or feeding on small bait. Of course I could still come home with my tail between my legs, but that’s fishing. RC: What rules do you fish by and what’s your number one no-no out on the water? HW: No rules, that's my rule. No-no’s are don’t talk to me too much when I’m fishing . RC: What’s your opinion on the standard of fishing in Australia? HW: I recon we have some of the best fishing in the world. Our impoundments are top class thanks to the SIPS system and a lot of our east coast has great fishing. I think we have a way to go to get a balance with the pros and regulations, but I think we just have to get some politicians with some nuts and brains in there to have a good honest look at some things that go on. RC: What fishing experience is on your wish list? HW: I’ll have a go at anything really. I liked fishing for salmon in Oregan. A heli trip over Alaska would be great, the country is gorgeous, fish are big, rivers are crystal clear and the fishing is different . Over here most things that are going to eat you are in the water. Over there they can come from anywhere. Last time I fished Oregan we were fishing a small stream in the mountains, there were bears on the river banks and elk, cougars and deer in the hills around us - pretty special. RC: Share one of your secrets with our readers HW: Try Jackall Transams and Maskvibes. I don’t care what you fish for because most fish eat them when they won’t eat other lures. You can fish them fast, erratic, slow, deep or shallow. Go to skeeterboats.com.au/hwatson.html to get your hands on Harry’s recommendations
story:
79
Gabi Mills
off the hook Harry Watson has been a freshwater guide chasing bass
Queensland New England ranges for years. He’s won and cod on the
dams and in the
prestigious tournaments for
bass, barra and golden perch and dominated five consecutive
AFC (Australian Fishing Championships) before retiring gracefully. He now owns one of the years of
most successful fishing lure companies in the country. asks
Harry everything the
RC
humble fisherman would want
to know to improve his game.
Harry’s Must-Have’s Rod: G Loomis Reel: Shimano Line: Platypus super braid Lure: Jackall Lure Boat: Skeeter ZX190
y r r a H
e m a g 's
Celebrity: Matt Watson meets David Letterman, his fame spreading far and wide.
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e’s something of a one off, is Matt Watson. Part stuntman, part crazy fish nut, part conservationalist, the New Zealand-based rising star of The Ultimate Fishing Show always knew that he’d be a fisherman. His enthusiasm for all things oceanbased have made this Bear Grylls of the sea the one to watch in terms of the new breed of TV fishing stars. Whether he’s jumping out of a helicopter to wrestle marlin, or revealing the beauties of the deep with a hand held cam, Matt’s passion for the Big Blue is infectious – and has been since he was just a toddler. “I started fishing when I was three years old with my father and grandfather,” says Matt, “and by the time I was 14, I caught a 245kg stingray with my cousin. It weighed more than the two of us, my boat and my motor all put together.” Brought up in the small sea side town of Weymouth in New Zealand, Matt was a regular sight on any given weekend, lugging his dinghy packed with fish and gear up the steep hill on the way home from the town’s boat ramp. Following in a long tradition of Kiwi fishermen, Matt cites John Gregory in particular as a hero. “I worked with John as a crew member on Primetime, a luxury game fishing vessel – he’s a great fisherman, and his record speaks for itself.
81
story:
Gabi Mills photos: Matt Watson
off the hook
is Matt Watson
n r o B l a Nat ur n a m r e Fish itself. He’s definitely the most determined fisherman I know, but I also admire Bay of Islands legends like Snooks Fuller, Bruce Smith and John Batteron.” Matt’s particular talent is to pull off seemingly impossible catches – think giant fish in tiny tinpot boats (or even surfboards) and you get the idea. It shouldn’t be possible but if Matt’s behind the reel, you can guarantee it’ll be Watson 1 Fish Nil. “Early in the morning, as the sun comes up, the air is crisp, the sea is flat and I’m with good mates are my ideal fishing conditions. Bad weather and bad fishing can make the fishing tough, but the worst thing is being out fishing with someone with a bad attitude. Fishing time is too precious to spend it with a dickhead.” By the time Matt and his wife’s second child was born in 2005 (characteristically delivered on the passenger seat of his wagon in the middle of a rain storm), the charismatic guy from Weymouth was becoming a popular character on TV in New Zealand and abroad, thanks to his enthusiasm for his sport and unique approach to extracting fish from the sea.
He’s off to Nova Scotia in Canada, one of the most beautiful wild fishing spots on Earth in a few months, and has some words of wisdom for those novice fishermen keen to follow in his footsteps. “Observation. When you are catching fish, take note of why. The same goes for when you’re not catching fish.” An important part of Matt’s makeup is his desire to raise conservation issues with his audience – many of the big game fish he catches are released back into the sea and he’s helped keep track of billfish population numbers locally. In addition he works with less fortunate kids, taking them on amazing fishing experiences, sharing the fun to be had on the high seas. “The most inspirational people I’ve fished with are the kids who I’ve taken fishing from the Make A Wish foundation. There have been some very sick children, and yet they’ve had a smile on their face the whole time and not complained about a single thing. I find that sort of attitude and sheer love of fishing inspirational, so I guess that makes them heroes to me.” For somebody with such an impressive record in fishing – he caught and tagged over
450 marlin in one spectacular season – Matt’s go to piece of fishing kit is surprisingly simple. “Space doesn’t permit me to list every bit of fishing gear I ‘need’, but I never go out without means to catch my own bait – so I’ll always have my trusty bait rod and bait flies.” Long term, the guy with ‘fisherman’ written in his passport’s profession box, and Bob Marley playing on his iPod will never be far from some bait, a rod and a boat but he has bigger fish to fry too (pun intended). “I want to reach more people, and inspire them to go fishing. I want to help restore the ocean to a sustainable level too. More people need to catch their own fish, and less people need to buy fish. While I’m on this soapbox, next time you’re at a restaurant order the steak, not the fish. So where does Matt see himself in five years? His answer is perhaps the same he would have given as a three-year-old “So long as I’m on, in or near saltwater, I’ll be happy.” For more info about Matt and the show visit www.theultimatefishingshow.com or search’ Matt Watson extreme fisherman’ on Facebook.
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outdoor living
advertorial
Changing tracks
T
here’s been a shift from coast to country for one of Western Australia’s leading marine dealership All Boat Business. The trusted boat business, which has one of the largest undercover showrooms in WA, has diversified its outdoor leisure offering into the caravanning sector with the arrival of the ‘Seachange’ brand by the Haines Group and locally based Western Caravans. As a result, the company has reflected this new expansion with a name change - to All Boats & Caravans, with the dealership now also selling caravanning accessories, options and parts to their loyal customer base. In August, All Boats & Caravans launched the latest models from the Seachange brand – Seachange 550 Series & Seachange 640 Elite - and Western Caravans’ revamped Karijini and Karijini RV at a Marine and RV Extravaganza. “This is a natural extension for us,” said owner Maz Yahiya, commenting on the firm’s move into the caravanning sector. “We know that caravanning and boating appeal to outdoor leisure and lifestyle adventurers so it makes sense to offer those pursuits under the one roof. “We tend to find that out of every four to five people looking to sell their boat there
will be one looking to buy a caravan and vice versa, so whether you are looking to explore the Kimberley coastline or Australia’s beautiful outback, you will most likely need a caravan or boat and in some instances, both. “So to reflect that, we now cater to all these requirements in a one stop shop,” he said. After working with the Haines Group for more than seven years, Mr Yahiya said it was a no brainer when it came to selecting which caravans he wanted to sell. “The Haines Group is a stand out brand in the marine industry. They have been building award-winning Australian boats for more than 50 years so when they informed me they were now manufacturing caravans it was a logical decision to stock their offerings. “Quality and attention to detail have been a hallmark of their designs. You can be sure that with the Haines Group you will be getting the same high standard both on and off the water,” he said. Seachange caravans are an upmarket luxury van built for the more serious off-road user capable of going anywhere a tough as old boots 4x4 drive will go. “I like to say that they’re a really good looking, tough hombre,” says Mr Yahiya. Western Caravans were recently taken over
by new operators and the new management team wasted no time designing the vehicles more for light weight road touring. Mr Yahiya believes that lightweight touring is very sought after these days for several reasons. “Sedans can tow them and the fuel economy is much better. Each Western, like Seachange, is hand crafted and can be customised to suit the client,” he said. “Westerns’ design and attention to detail are a credit to the new kids on the block.” The marine and RV centre also has a huge fishing department, open every day except public holidays so for all your water-based activities, make tracks for All Boats & Caravans.
To discover the latest outdoor leisure offerings visit All Boats & Caravans, WA’s Marine and RV centre, 4 Hocking Rd, Kingsley or call 08 9309 4200.
84
Rick Parish
local
local
F
ounder of the Telethon Adventurers, Rick Parish is a fund raising whirlwind, responsible for injecting close to $4 million into vital research to combat childhood brain cancers – the condition which robbed Rick and wife Emily of their youngest son, Elliot, aged just four in 2011. This year Rick, who was recently a finalist for the West Australian of the Year, and Australian of the Year is aiming to raise $2 million during Telethon, kicking off by leading a group of ten intrepid mums and dads up the Alps in France during one of the many ‘Adventures’ his charity has organised each year since Elliot was diagnosed with a brain cancer in 2010.
he ro he ro
wa qld
RC: What do you love about living in WA? RP: I enjoy the fact that WA seems to attract so many innovative, creative people. I came here from South Australia when I was in the regiment (the SAS), and am so glad it’s my home now. RC: What could you do without? RP: Childhood cancers – my aim in life since Elliot died is to board up the Princess Margaret Hospital’s children’s cancer ward. Thanks to the millions of dollars that have been donated, we’ve now funded two fellowships to investigate the cancer’s causes, as well as providing world class equipment for doctors and researchers.
That day is getting closer with every dollar that’s donated to the cause. RC: What couldn’t you do without? RP: My family – my wife, Emily, my sons Lachlan, Harry and Hudson, and of course the one that’s missing. It’s our daily battle to live on without Elliot, but it’s also conversely the reason we’re fighting so hard the war against childhood cancers. RC: What are you most proud of? RP: I’m so proud of Emily, how she’s dealt so bravely with the loss of our son, I’m proud of my kids and what we’ve achieved with the Adventurers. They’re just a bunch of mums and dads, some of whom have lost their own children, all
85
THE TELETHON ADVENTURERES making a difference one adventure at a time www.theadventurers.com.au
Golden child: Rick and Eliot Parish (left). with the same aim: to beat childhood cancer. RC: Where would you like to live if not in WA? RP: The South of France – I love great wine and food, and would love to live in one of the countryside villages, like Grasse, clinging to a mountainside near the Mediterranean. RC: Who is your hero? RP: Professor Fiona Stanley – she’s the patron of the Telethon Institute and has been an enormous influence on me. And Elliot of course, the way he so bravely battled his fate. RC: Tell us something we don’t know about you. RP: I am very angry – I’ m angry at cancer for stealing my youngest son from me. I like boxing – it helps me to punch away the anger. RC: What’s the last thing you think about at night? RP: Elliot, but not just in terms of the memories we shared together. I’m also thinking about why we are working so hard, how Elliot’s Army is making a difference and how each day brings us a step closer to solving the cancer’s riddle. When Elliot was diagnosed in late 2009, there were 50 kids diagnosed in WA with cancer related diseas. Last year there were over 100, and Ward 3B at PMH is full – that keeps me awake at night. We have to stop it. It’s that simple. RC: What one thing would make your life better? RP: Finding a cure of course but also perhaps to find some way of increasing corporate philanthropy so that companies were ‘forced’ or at least motivated to increase the percentage of profits that they donate. RC: What’s on your epitaph? RP: When I was in the SAS, our motto was ‘Who Dares Wins’. Nowadays I try to live by a slightly different version – ‘Who Cares Wins’.
86
story:
Gabi Mills Alex Cearns of Houndstooth Studio
photos:
fundraising
Raise a glass for the animals
87
fundraising
T
he Perth night sky will glow on October 27 as an opulent candlelit marquee in Supreme Court Gardens welcomes guests to an evening of fundraising for wildlife conservation. An Evening for the Animals will feature celebrity chef Herb Faust’s degustation menu, while the team from Cocktails Gastronomy will pair their canapés with unique cocktails to raise money for protection of endangered animals including tigers, elephants and orangutans. Rebecca Tilbrook, the founder of the hosting organization, Foundation for the Animals has a strong background in fundraising for conservation from Washington DC as well as Perth. “We are at a crossroads in conservation where we urgently need to set land aside and protect it as permanent habitat for tigers orang-utans, and some species of gibbons or zoos may be the only place they exist in the near future,” she said The same will be true of elephants, bears and many other species very shortly if humans don’t value these creatures by establishing economically sustainable sanctuaries to safeguard their futures, says Ms Tilbrook. The beneficiaries of the event are the Perth-based Orangutan Project, the Silvery Gibbon Project as well as US-based Wildlife Alliance. Each of these organisations has a model of conservation that combines direct protection of habitat with community development, education, and rehabilitation of animals so they can be reintroduced to the wild. They also ensure that 100% of donations go to field work, a rare but important distinction according to Tilbrook. The event, which is a new addition to Perth’s social calendar, has attracted A-list guests, many from the resources industry, as well as media and hospitality identities. The Master of Ceremonies for the creative black tie event, with a ‘jungle elegant’ theme
will be world record breaking adventurer and journalist Sorrel Wilby, chairman of the Australian Geographic Society. Luxury tent and furnishings company Villa Kula is a major sponsor and will ensure the setting is exquisite, the perfect backdrop to an ultra glam night. “The groups that we’re supporting have the land and the backing of the host governments,” said Rebecca. “They have the know-how; all they need are the resources. With only two to 10% of original habitat left for these animals, the time to act is now.” Sponsors from the resources, consulting and fashion industries have lined up to support the event, with packages from $850 to $20,000 still available. “Act quickly to secure your place among those welcomed to the exclusive ‘Elephant Bar’, serviced by Cocktails Gastronomy and open only to top sponsors,” said Rebecca. Sponsors have also stumped up fantastic auction prizes for the night, including a private dinner party with celebrity Herb Faust and a complete in-home makeover by a top international hair and makeup consultant, a roundtrip visit to New York City via business class tickets on Singapore Airlines and trips to Cambodia to visit Angkor Wat and the wildlife sanctuary run by Wildlife Alliance outside Phnom Pehn. For a touch of bling, Brinkhaus jewellers is also creating a custom pendant for the evening .
An Evening for the Animals is on October 27, 2012, at Supreme Court Gardens, from 7 to midnight. For further information and details of sponsorship options available, please contact info@aneveningfortheanimals.org
88
story:
Gabi Mills Singapore Grand Prix Library with thanks
photos:
events
Pulse racing, Singapore-style
I
Katy Perry Full throttle at the Grand Prix
f you’re a rev head, and also like your music hot and heavy, then head to Singapore in September for the Formula 1 SingTel Grand Prix which this year will also play to host to some world class A-list entertainers. Pop princess Katy Perry, tatt king Adam Levine and his band Maroon 5, ex-Oasis head honcho Noel Gallagher, The Pretenders, 80’s chicks Banarama and Scottish glasses-wearing twins The Proclaimers will all be entertaining the crowds on the Padang Stage. And the race itself is very special indeed – it’s a night race where the Formula 1 stars get to roar past The Lion City’s most famous landmarks, lighting up the tropical night sky with the flash and boom of nitro to the max. As well as Katy and her friends, four local Aussie acts will also strut their stuff. Sassy singer-songwriter Mama Kin, quick-change artistes Soul Mystique, award-winning beatboxer Tom Thum and illusionist Nicholas Tweedy will fly the flag from Down Under. During the three day motor sport and musical extravaganza, visitors will lap up 10 hours of racing action as well as all the top shelf entertainment – hosted in one of the most exciting cities on earth.
Fact box
Trackside tickets start as low as AUD$45, while a three-day Premier Walkabout ticket averages at AUD$115 per day with access to all zones and 350 entertainers within the circuit park. To guarantee your spot at the action packed 2012 Formula 1 SingTel Singapore Grand Prix, Creative Holidays is offering packages to the Grand Prix from AUD$829. Packages include three nights 4 star accommodation between 21-23 September, return airport transfers and a 3-day Bay Grandstand ticket with access to Zones 3 & 4. Flights are not included. For further information or to book please visit www.creativeholidays.com. For details on the performance location and timings, please visit www.singaporegp.sg for the latest updates.
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91
advertorial
recruitment & careers
More than a bright sparky
92
Success story: FMG’s operations in Port Hedland and the Pilbara are a big part of WA’s mining boom.
advertorial
recruitment & careers
T
hirty- year-old Eric Thompson has proved that he is more than just a bright sparky. The Fortescue Metals Group Process Control Coordinator is an electrician committed to becoming an engineer. Eric started out as an electrician at Fortescue’s port operations in Port Hedland two years ago and since then the company has given him numerous opportunities to develop, including a supervisor role. “Because Fortescue is rapidly expanding there are so many opportunities for employees to explore,” Eric said. “I am now working in process control where I get to work with both electricians and engineers.
“Process control is very challenging and I really enjoy the technical aspect of the role, especially working on PLC programs.” Eric completed an instrumentation qualification a few years ago to develop his skills and is currently looking into pathways to an engineering degree. “I am looking forward to working at Fortescue as an engineer and gaining even more experience,” he said. “Your career can advance so much here at Fortescue and I would definitely recommend people further their studies and increase their skills.” Located in the iron ore rich Pilbara region, Fortescue is the world’s fourth largest iron ore producer and we are still growing. Fortescue is committed to ensuring its operations maximise employment and business opportunities for Indigenous people.
As the company expands, Fortescue will have an increased number of professional opportunities and we strongly encourage Indigenous people to apply. In March 2012, Aboriginal people comprised more than 10 per cent of Fortescue’s workforce. The company has awarded $350 million in contracts to Aboriginal businesses across its operations and growth projects.
Visit the People and Careers section on the website www.fmgl.com.au or visit FMG’s Facebook page to see the latest jobs available.
Do you have the fire in your belly? That deep down passion to succeed, no matter what the odds? It’s the kind of can-do attitude we look for at Fortescue. After all, we’re the mining company that built our own railway through the rugged Pilbara, and plan to triple output by mid next year.
If you’ve got the same spirited determination as us (and a big heart), apply by visiting fmgl.com.au/jobs
94
Can do, will do By Debbie Russo
Sept 2012
T
he guys n’ gals over at Rock Candy thought the magazine could do with a little progesterone to balance out your testosterone (that’s the lady stuff that makes us, well, ladies in case you forgot). And before you start to fret that I’m going to whinge about what you are or aren’t doing right, relax. I’m just here to tell you my side of the story. The FIFO wife side. It’s about balance - and we all need balance. So they asked me to introduce myself and write about my day (or swing). I’m going to need more than six hundred words to fit in all the adventures I have in one swing, so welcome to my new regular column. Each swing is different - it’s like entering the Haunted House ride at the show. It can be dark and lonely and you know something will probably jump out and do one of two things - either scare the crap out of you or fill you with fits of laughter so bad you wet yourself. And, just like that spooky ride at the show, you don’t know when or where that’s going to happen. To get through you just have to keep going, no matter what. We do a four and four in the offshore sector and each swing is different. Incidentally I hate the word swing, it brings so many references to mind. But each one typically teaches me something, showing me what I am and what I’m not capable of. This month, I discovered that: a) I can’t operate a chainsaw, or b) back a trailer, but I can c) lop a 20ft gum tree. It might have been with a hand saw, but that little sucker eventually found its way to the dump. I discovered that there’s a new invention for gluing children’s fingertips back on after one of mine stuck his hand in a moving exercise bike chain, and that the minimum time you must wait in hospital after your child has fallen two meters head first off the veranda while trying to be Spider-Man is four hours. I have discovered how to finally get the tyre off the chassis, that I can lift 20 kilos of
wheel onto an axle to change it – and that I’m no time-wasting damsel in distress. I have worked out how to rewire the back lights on the trailer and that now know how to dismount a power-wing scooter without making an arse of myself in front of the neighbours. I hasten to add this is only week two of a four-week swing and I’m eager to see what adventures and educational jollies the next fortnight throws at me. I do know that I’m in for some sleep deprivation as Boy 1 is sick, Boy 2 has been sick and Boy 3 is currently coming down sick. This will make for a delightful mummy on the phone to the FIFO husband when he manages to check in. So, on top of all my little educational incidents that this FIFO life throws at me, I’m Debbie the mother, cook, cleaner, taxi, teacher, gardener, book keeper, councillor and sometimes, but enjoyably, my husband’s secretary. In all that, I try to run an online store and, in between, my little blog. I blog about this fantastic FIFO life of mine. We love the lifestyle and what it can offer you, but it also has its downfalls. I blog about my life in a nutshell and that my outlook is it’s only what you make it. You have full control over your decisions and how you react to what life throws at you. I could can rattle off that FIFO makes you drink too much, can cause depression, that you miss out on birthdays, Easter and Christmas, that your marriage is failing - but in the end your life is what it is because of your decisions and the reactions made by you. I know that the FIFO life can be hard. It is hard. It can make or break relationships and unless you understand that amazing word ‘communication’ you are doomed for failure. So do you get the type of person I am? No pity parties here. Now how’s that for balance ?
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search
http://thefifowife.com.au
Say G’day to Debbie We’re stoked to have The FIFO Wife, aka Debbie Russo onboard here at RC as our new regular Rock Chick columnist. She tells it how it is, from the other side of the FIFO fence - as one of those perennially waiting for a partner to come home, then go back to work just a few weeks later, literally left holding the babies. So here’s a few words from Deb herself: “Im 35 but I will forever be 26. I have three yummy boys aged 6,4 and 2 years old. I live in the country and I love it. I’ve been a FIFO wife for thirteen years now. I love it most days - note the word most - and I believe this is a lifestyle you either make it work or you dont. Its up to you. Its hard work but its worth it.” So we hope you enjoy Deb’s honest take on being a FIFO wife - insight guaranteed.
Cancer affects every Australian. One in two Australians will be diagnosed with cancer by the age of 85. But when they receive that diagnosis, it will impact everyone around them. That’s why we offer support to people living with cancer, their friends and their family. If you ever need to talk about cancer, call our Helpline on 13 11 20 or visit cancerwa.asn.au for more information. Cancer Council WA thanks Candy Media for generously providing this advertising space.
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Homebuyers Centre has a range of complete home & land packages available, both north and south of the river starting at just $299,000. These modern terrace style designs not only offer an affordable price point, but significant value for money too. • • • • • •
3 Bedrooms and 2 Bathrooms Spacious open plan layout with stylish high ceilings Gourmet kitchen with stainless steel appliances & Caesarstone benchtops Quality floor coverings and window treatments Master bedroom with ensuite and walk-in robe Paved porch, path and outdoor entertaining area
Upon completion these low maintenance homes will be finished and ready to move into, without you having to lift a finger. So now you can relax and enjoy the building experience, where everything is taken care of for you.
6365 5704
www.homebuyers.com.au
HOT OFFER - $10,000 OFF THE LISTED LAND PRICE AT BLUEWATER ESTATE
o g n i v i L s is n r i a in C dise Para
advertorial
W
ith an enviable lifestyle, great year-round weather and one of the most stunning physical settings in the world, Allaro Homes explains why there is no better place to live and build a home than in Cairns. For many fly in fly out mining employees the choice of where to live can often be difficult. With rents soaring in Western Australian and Queensland mining towns and modest and often unappealing houses costing as much to lease as houses in the most prestigious suburbs of inner city Melbourne and Sydney, many are looking for more. Few places compare to the lifestyle Cairns can offer, according to Allaro Homes managing director Wayne Cavallaro. He describes the city, which is the gateway to the Great Barrier Reef as a tropical paradise that is affordable with a medium house price of $350,000 and proven rental returns of $305 per week for a modest three-bedroom home, as at September 2011. The Cavallaro family, behind one of north Queensland’s leading builders Allaro Homes, have been involved in the building industry for four generations. Wayne believes Cairns still offers the best long-term investment opportunity than anywhere else in Australia. “Unlike other FIFO destinations, there are no compromises when it comes to lifestyle for those wanting to live in Cairns. Not only do local residents live in a tropical paradise, it is also affordable compared to other FIFO destinations. ” Wayne describes Cairns’ as an adventure junkie’s paradise with extensive sporting and recreational facilities with four wheel driving, white water rafting, scuba diving, bungy jumping, rock climbing, skydiving and more. However, he says the lifestyle and the range of things to do is also a draw card for families. This is on top of the high standard of education services including one of Australia’s top universities and health services, with both public and private hospitals. “Cairns has got it all, a great lifestyle, perfect year-round weather, affordable housing, international airport and a great range of things to do for individuals and families. This is so important when you are away from your family for six months of the year. The time spent with them becomes
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Allaro Homes ph: 07 4031 0022 wwww.allarohomes.com.au www.facebook.com/AllaroHomes
real estate
even more precious – family days to the beach, day trips to the Atherton Tablelands or Port Douglas, cycling or walking the many rainforest tracks, are just some of the things you can do together.” It is also these reasons, which makes Cairns a desirable place to live ensuring a strong rental market with great returns. Whether you do decide to build your home to live in or as an investment, the master planned community of Bluewater at Trinity Beach offers the perfect location. Integrating a variety of parkland, rainforest and waterfront homes, the 155-hectare estate, also boasts a 108-berth marina offering the ultimate experience in northern living. “Bluewater is close to the beach and boat ramps, close to schools and two shopping centres and is a smart wired estate,” Wayne adds. As a FIFO employee, Allaro Homes understands it may not be possible to oversee all of a home’s key milestones first-hand, however, with the use state of the art 3D rendering software and real time tracking online, clients have piece of mind their build is progressing to schedule. “With a proven track record in the building industry,
you can be assured your investment will be built on time, to budget and with the Allaro Homes trademark award-winning quality.” In fact, it is Allaro Homes’ policy to only use the same tradesmen on their investment properties as they do on their residential homes, ensuring a high standard of finish regardless of the type of home being built. “People invest in property for many different reasons. Allaro Homes understands this and will work with you ensuring a property that suits your budget and investment needs, whether you are looking to build a one-off residential home to on sell immediately or a long-term investment property that will yield strong rental returns and capital growth.” Allaro Homes will help build your future in Cairns and will plan every last detail of your new home to perfection, giving you the freedom to choose how involved you want to be in your residential or investment project. “When you engage with Allaro Homes, you are dealing with a builder, not a salesperson who will work with you to achieve what you want in your new home.”
The first five people to mention this advertisement and purchase any of Bluewater’s available blocks of land will receive a $10,000 reduction off the listed price. Visit www.bluewaterliving.com.au for more information.
Planned to perfection
Cairns beauty is more than skin deep. We attract fly-in-fly-out workers from all corners of Australia to our tropical, active and exciting lifestyle.
$10,000 off contract price of land Until 31 December 2012, Allaro Homes is offering $10,000 off the contract price of the land, for one of their Cairns House and Land Packages, awarded to the first five contracts. Contact us to register your interest at: www.allarohomes.com.au or 07 4031 0022 today.*
07 4031 0022
*Terms & Conditions apply. Visit allarohomes.com.au for terms and conditions.
cairns@allarohomes.com.au www.allarohomes.com.au BSA: 1008032
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• Q u a l i t y P r o f e s s i o n a l Ta t t o o i n g • Premium Colour Blends • Q u a l i t y S h a d i n g & L i n e Wo r k
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The Illustrated Man-Tattoo Studio of Fine Art can be found at 230 Elizabeth St, Sydney, walk in off the street or give them a bell next time you’re in the area, ask for Johnny and tell ‘em Rock Candy sent you. Phone (02) 9211 3761 www.theillustratedman.com.au illustratedman@bigpond.com
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t seems unlikely, but thanks to the discovery of a frozen 3000 year old Italian man, we now know that tattooing has been around rather longer than you might think. Thanks to Otzi the Iceman in the Swiss Alps, slowly thawing out, the world was surprised to find fifty seven tattoos inked on his stiff brown body, making the little fella the earliest known surviving example of tattoo body art. A little bit closer to home and Johnny Casino on the business considerably less chilly is one of Australia’s most prestigious tattoo shops, the legendary Illustrated Man, located in the heart of Sydney. It’s a very blue collar tattoo studio with some of Australia’s hardest working and professional artists, no different from them, I try to give people and at its heart is one of the studios most the things they want in a tattoo with some sought after artists, Johnny Casino. of my artistic licence.”, just the same way A professional muso, who’s toured the the Taxi driver gets me home from the bar world, Johnny sees clear links between his late at night , just creating a service.” commitment to making ‘honest’ music and He’s dismissive too of the breed of his drive to create amazing body art. tattooers who somehow elevate their “My passion for music comes from craft to something more high flown. tradition and I think that’s where my “Just the same way as the taxi driver passion for tattoos comes from as gets me home from the bar late at night, I’m well, although it took me a few years just creating a service –that’s what a lot of to work that out,” says Johnny. people who call themselves tattooers don’t “I was taught to tattoo in a very traditional understand. Most of them think they are way in America and I’m VERY happy rock stars but I just think they’re knobs.” I learned about those things, as many Johnny’s approach to work and “tattooers” I see coming through now don’t play is refreshingly straightforward. know the first thing about tradition and He does both because it ‘feels right’, why things are done the way they are. not for anybody else’s benefit. “Maybe that’s what sets “I write and play music that is honest me apart from others. and feels right to me, and I’m not being a “I’m not interested in all that bullshit jerk when I say I don’t really care who else that goes on with TV tattoo shows likes it if it makes sense to me, then I do it. because it has very little to do with “I don’t make a whole lot of money off tattooing as far as I’m concerned.” music but I’ve been able to tour Europe three There’s no pretention about Johnny, times and America twice - the music takes despite the fact that some would consider care of itself and I’m lucky for that reason. the body art he creates to be at the upper Johnny honed his skills in America, scale of artistic ability – he simply sees following traditional styles with a familiar tattooing as a way of earning a crust. image as his first tattoo attempt. “Tattooing is my job, it’s the way I “My first tattoo was a heart with make a living, just the same as some Mum in it done by the guy who taught people build houses and drive taxis. I’m me how to tattoo, and the first tattoo I
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Most of them think they’re rock stars but I just think they’re knobs
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did was the southern stars on his leg.” He’s not phased by any request, and doesn’t particularly have a favourite style. “I work in a shop were you need to be able to do everything, I’m happy doing whatever walks in the shop next, as long as they have the money to pay me, then I’m up for it. Equally if a client asks for something really outlandish or out of the question, Johnny won’t pull his punches. “I’ll refuse to do a tattoo I think it’s a REALLY bad idea, I won’t do it, but everyone is different so you have to respect what people want and try to do the best with their idea.” With everybody from Angelina Jolie to David Beckham now sporting multiple tattoos it seems its never been cooler to get yourself some ink – but for those who’s body is still a blank canvas, Johnny has some advice. “Getting a tattoo appeals in different ways to people. I get tattoos because I like them. I think they represent memories and are souvenirs. Some people have them, and some don’t – it doesn’t make a difference to me.” If he wasn’t tattooing or playing music, you get the impression that Johnny would not be a happy camper. “I guess I’d be working a job that I didn’t really like and answering the same question to somebody that maybe I didn’t like either – so I consider myself a very, very lucky person.”
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Su i te 5 - 513 Ha y St Subiaco (Ent rance on Rowland St) | Ph : (08) 9380 431 5 E mai l: uni q uetat t oos.subi@gmail .com | www.face book.com/u niqu e tattoossu biaco O PE n T u E Sday TO SaTuRd ay
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Who’s this, then?
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Win a surfboard by fieldey There are surfboards, and there are Fieldey surfboards – beautiful, quirky, bespoke works of art designed by Fieldey, aka Haylee Fieldes. We’ve got one of her unique boards to give away, worth over $1000. For your chance to win just answer this simple question: Where was Haylee Fieldes born? Was it: a. New Zealand; b. New England; or c. New York? Send your answer, plus contact details to competitions@candymedia.com.au by October 31. One lucky winner will receive their very own custom designed Fieldey surfboard.
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Who’s this, then?
fieldey a.k.a
www.fieldey.com
Haylee Fieldes Q&A
Who are you? I’m a Kiwi-born artist who specialises in painting strange things on boards. What do you do? I custom-paint various items but mostly surfboards, skateboards and the occasional car bonnet. How do you find yourself in Perth? I was born in New Zealand in the 80’s and when I was eight my parents carted me off kicking and screaming to Norfolk Island. I grew up on a tiny eight by five kilometre island surrounded by some of the meanest oceans around, which kindled a healthy fear and interest in the ocean. I’ve travelled a lot since then and washed up on these sunny shores in 2007 after chasing an anthropologist here. How did you get started designing and painting surfboards? Why did you choose surfboards and later skateboard decks? I took up surfing last year and you know, once you get bitten by the surfing bug you start to collect surfboards like a mad bastard. After collecting a couple of boards I decided to paint one of them and it was the start of an unhealthy obsession for painting surfboards. I got into skateboarding earlier this year because I thought “if I’m going to be painting these things, I should know how to ride them”. I love cruising about Perth on my longboard and skating around the car park across the road from my house like some kind of ancient delinquent. Tell us about the designs on your surfboards. Which one is your favourite and the one you are most proud of? I really like to name inanimate objects so the designs are an extension of that. I give the surfboard a name and paint a character to go with it – there’s everything from a Prawn Star to Saint Calamari. My favourite board is generally the newest one, but I really like the Saucy Knave, I think this one captures the vision that I see in my head and tells a pretty cool story. Where do your ideas come from? Clichés, old school tattoos, 1940’s pinups, mythology, religion, Día de los Muertos (Mexico’s Day of the Dead celebrations), shrunken heads and fever dreams. You’ve also painted a car, right? Me and a fellow artist friend painted the bonnet of her car and with a big Dia de los Muertos skull. We filmed the whole thing and put it up on my YouTube channel. I’ve got the car waiting patiently in my garage until I get round to painting the rest of it. Can you ride a Fieldey board on the water or are they only for walls? Oh yeah, you can surf on them, but the paint will come off eventually and I’d be pissed off at you. These babies are meant
to be works of art and loved and cherished on your wall. I am however in the process of setting up a brand of inlay prints for custom-made surfboards you can ride. What’s the best compliment or oddest comment you’ve received about a board? Saber, a Los Angeles graffiti artist, wrote: “Surfs up! Great detailed works on surfboards. Tiki, skulls, and beach ladies are usually usual, but this guy rocks it! Definitely an updated twist to an older art movement using crisp, clean, graphic-style painting on an unforgiving medium. Just playing around with surfboards takes a bit of know-how
and a sense of craftsmanship.” Awww shucks, I’m proud to be one of the “guys”. The oddest comment would be some guy who I was trying to buy a board from. He went absolutely mental on me over the phone when I said I was going to paint it – screaming “I’m a very busy man. I own a real estate agency!” – until I hung up. Do you do custom designs? Yes I do. Someone I bought a board off recently asked me to design a tattoo version of one the characters which he’s getting incorporated into a tattoo sleeve.
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safety
first the rules according to Heath Franklin’s Chopper One of Australia’s hardest working comedians Heath Franklin, is RC’s newest member of the team. So get a brew, pull up a chair and enjoy the first taster from the man with the fake moustache and high voice who counts his worst ever gig as the one on a boat with strippers. “I don’t know who wants to see strippers and comedy on the same night, probably people who find clowns sexy.”
the last word Hello, Chopper here to have a little chat about occupational health and safety. Some of you may be thinking ‘But Chopper, how is it that an unhinged psycho with a penchant for violent crime is suddenly concerned about safety?’ Well, I guess my message is that accidents happen, but they seem to happen a lot more frequently to friggin’ idiots. It’s not about being some padded nanny state that protects idiots from themselves, it’s about sacking up and taking responsibility for yourself. I always insist that getaway drivers wear seatbelts and check tyre pressure and I like to think that has helped me stay one step ahead of some of the other idiot crims that ended up in jail or spread out across the pavement somewhere. If you have your hand ripped off in a giant piece of whirring, grinding angry machinery and you start pissing and moaning about how there was no sign that suggested that a giant piece of whirring, grinding angry machinery could rip your hand off then all I have for you is the sympathetic sound of one hand clapping. Us human beings slowly climbed our way to the top of the food chain by being smart enough to avoid hazards like mammoths, sabre tooth tigers and berries that look delicious but make your innards liquefy. We used our faces and brains to figure out that things that kill you make you dead, a skill that a lot of people seem to have forgotten. Also, the phrase ‘that which doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’ is a bunch of crap. As stated above sometimes things that don’t kill you leave you feeling awkward when it’s time to buy a pair of gloves, try to clap etc. This is the first time in the history of man that our own survival suddenly seems to be someone else’s problem. Sure, the people who pay you to turn rocks ‘n’ shit into dollars have a responsibility to make sure that you have everything you need not to die in the course of your day at work, but once they’ve given you the helmet they shouldn’t have to put it on your head. So you can lead a horse to water but you can’t stop it from being a total drop kick. You also have to look out for each other. If I went to work and some daydreaming numb nuts got distracted and ran over my face with a piece of heavy machinery I would quite rightfully have a reason to be angry. And needless to say having to explain to someone that you ran over their face while trying to sneak in some Angry Birds time at work will be the dumbest you have ever felt. Let’s face it though, not all accidents are caused by gibbering, devolved morons. Sometimes its just five minutes before lunch and you think ‘she’ll be right’. I can guarantee the phrase ‘She’ll be right’ was thought or said before every major disaster since the dawn of time. The captain on the Titanic snuck off for a crap just after he thought ‘She will be right’ There was some German dude thinking ‘Das frauline icht bin right’ just before the Hindenberg blew up. So look after yourself, because if anything happens to you, your family will find all those naughty magazines in your sock drawer when they are going through your stuff. And look after the people you work with, if only so you have someone to talk to at lunchtime. See Heath Franklin’s Chopper live in The (s)Hitlist at Perth’s Octagon Theatre on Fri Oct 26. Tickets available from www.bocsticketing.com.au