Riverfront Times, May 17, 2023

FRONT BURNER

MONDAY, MAY 8 It’s barely May and already muggy. Any St. Louisan knows that summer weather means bloodshed, and sure enough, the last 72 hours saw a spree of killing: From Friday through today, 11 people were shot in the city and five killed. The Post-Dispatch reports that between 2018 and 2022, about 42 percent of city homicides went down between May and August. Brace yourself!

TUESDAY, MAY 9 It’s cooler today — does that mean we can stop killing each other? And while CITY SC loses 2-1 in the U.S. Open, high school phenom Miguel Perez scores his first goal! Meanwhile, a jury finds that gross old guy on TV liable for sexually assaulting columnist E. Jean Carroll at a Bergdorf Goodman fitting room in 1996. Apparently you can’t just grab ’em by the pussy

WEDNESDAY, MAY 10 Far from being chastened, the old guy shows up to a CNN Town Hall packed with fans and spews more nasty crap about Carroll.

Previously On

LAST WEEK IN ST. LOUIS

(Seriously, CNN, since when did town halls come to mean “a rowdy room of one’s supporters’’?) Carroll says she might sue again, and why not? Back home, the Missouri legislature passes anti-trans legislation, while Governor Mike Parson says anyone can apply for Kim Gardner’s soon-to-be-vacant job through a convenient web portal. He’s looking for someone with strong managerial experience and a commitment to the “written rule of law,” which surely rules out both the Loop trolley and Mark McCloskey. Small blessings.

THURSDAY, MAY 11 The Missouri Legis lature votes to ban texting while driving which would leave Montana the only state

FIVE QUESTIONS for Matt Vogel, who plays Kermit the Frog

Big Bird, Kermit the Frog, Count von Count, these characters are Muppet icons, and Matt Vogel plays them all. He started in 1996 as an understudy to Caroll Spinney who famously played Big Bird on Sesa me Street. Now he’s the puppet captain for the series, works with The Muppets Studio and produces the podcast Below the Frame with Matt Vogel, where he gives listeners the inside scoop on what it’s like to be a Mupeteer. He recently returned to his alma mater, Webster University, to give the commencement address. We caught up with him the day before his big speech.

This interview has been edited for length and clarity.

Big Bird is a Muppet you wear, right? It must be hot in there. It is hot in there. It’s like 4,000 feathers, which doesn’t seem like it’d be heavy or hot, but it’s both of those.

It must be hard to do all those different voices when you learn different Muppets.

There’s a whole bunch of different things you have to learn, but yes, the voice is one of those things. There’s also a lot of very intricate, subtle puppetry moves. That’s the technical aspect of it. We’re trying to make something that isn’t real look very real and look like it’s breathing and experiencing real emotion. To do that, we have to see our performance. So we’re looking at a monitor that shows us what you see at home when you’re watching the show.

Everything is above the head. So your arms must get tired. Do you take a lot of breaks?

When we’re shooting a show there’s always a lot of starting and stopping. But for something like the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, we start up at 79th Street in Central Park West, and we head all the way down to 34th Street, which is quite a long way to go. There’s not a lot of opportunity to take any breaks. There are thousands of people watching you the whole way down the parade route. So there’s a certain amount of stamina that we do have as Muppet performers. But that event is one of the harder things I

to let adult drivers text and drive. The bill now goes to Governor Parson, and while this will surely be yet another statute no one enforces in this lawless state, we’ll take it.

FRIDAY, MAY 12 Under state law, the legislature must adjourn today — and adjourn it does, limping across the finish line as a series of filibusters yammer on. Writes the Missouri Independent, “Over the last 30 years, only the COVIDshortened 2020 legislative session saw lawmakers adjourn with fewer bills heading to the governor’s desk.” Talk about

strip city control of the St. Louis police

The Senate also failed to approve a bill to make it harder for citizens to amend the Missouri Constitution — yep, the GOP wanted to put a halt to the same process that gave us Medicaid expansion and cannabis on demand. Thank God our local Republicans don’t get along with each other any better than they do with the rest of us. We love gridlock

SATURDAY, MAY 13 Afternoon thunderstorms provide respite from muggy temps — although CITY SC loses again, this time in Chicago. “Something is missing,” team captain Roman Bürki says. We’re no soccer experts, but we’d say goals are missing. Score a few more, please!

SUNDAY, MAY 14 It’s Mother’s Day, and the restaurants are packed. Also, people are fighting in the downtown streets, undoubtedly over whose mom is the . We’ll settle this one for you, kids: It’s our mom. Our mom is the greatest.

have to do.

Is Sesame Street affected by the writers’ strike?

We finished shooting our season in the middle of March, so we are between seasons right now. But I’m supporting the WGA and their strike, for sure.

What was your reaction when you were asked to be the Commencement speaker?

I was really honored. I have such great memories from being here at Webster. I never really thought that I would be at this point, and I’m going to tell the graduates tomorrow to take a moment and appreciate it. That goes for me as well. I’m going to take a moment to appreciate this honor and being here in this moment.

—Rosalind Early

Matt Vogel hanging out with some of his famous friends. | JULIAN WASS

WEEKLY WTF?!

VOX POPULI

St. Louis, What Happened to Real Toasted Ravioli?

BY VINNY CARELLA

Ifirst came to St. Louis in the late August of 1966 to attend Saint Louis University. I was born in San Francisco and grew up in San Mateo, California. St. Louis was a big change, especially the humidity.

After a couple of weeks on campus, I heard of a restaurant called Garavelli’s a few blocks over on Olive Street. A friend told me, “Try the toasted ravioli.” I’m Italian on both sides. I have eaten a good amount of ravioli and once spent a whole day with my mother, my aunt and a couple of cousins making several different types of ravioli. Naturally, I was intrigued when he said “toasted” ravioli. I had never heard of it before, so I decided to give it a try.

top and melted butter ladled over the cheese. The cooks must have thrown it back under a broiler because the cheese-butter combination on top was crusted.

Location: Highway 55, near the intersection of Broadway and Cherokee Street

Exclamation marks: three

Other cities where you’d see this: zero

Other cities where people would post about it online and write about it in the newspaper: less than zero

Did the tagger add extra cheese?: Yes, notice Provel is also tagged on the Porta Potty as well as on the other side of the highway

Odds this is Imo’s guerrilla marketing: 50/50

The appropriateness of all this Provel being right next to a bathroom: 100

15 SECONDS OF FAME

WORST

MOTHER’S DAY TWEET EVER: Missouri GOP

In a moment that surely had trans people across Missouri saying, “Why are you so obsessed with us?,” the Missouri GOP decided to use Mother’s Day not to celebrate all of the state’s moms but to remind everyone that the party is deeply anti-trans.

The legislature already passed a law that prevents minors from starting gender-affirming care and made it so all athletes, even college ones, must play on the team of their gender as assigned at birth, not the gender they identify with.

But in case you thought the anti-trans laws were about protecting the kids — the rhetoric the GOP likes to use when doing anything antiLGBTQ — the party revealed that it is actually more keen on disparaging trans people. A Mother’s Day message posted to the official Missouri GOP Twitter account shows a man in drag speaking to another man. The caption reads, “when a transgender woman claims they can be a mom” and the person in drag throws their slipper.

Unpacking this level of crazy would be difficult for anyone who is not a trained psychiatrist. This is the same party that was, a few months ago, looking to pass a draconian drag show ban. But totally cool to share memes of people in drag on Twitter.

And needless to say it is not really honoring the moms (transgender or not) who we’re supposed to be celebrating on Mother’s Day. But since cringe is the Missouri GOP brand, it’s pretty much spot on.

When I walked into Garavelli’s for the first time, I was struck by the restaurant itself. On the right side was a bar that ran almost all the way to the end of the room. Along the left side were several booths and then a long steam table from which the food was served. You would walk to the end of the steam table where the register was, grab a tray (it was cafeteria style), and choose what you wanted as you moved back down the line. There were large hams and big chunks of roast beef that they would carve to make sandwiches, all types of salads, hot dogs and sausages, a pretty good variety of choices.

When I got my tray, I told the cashier I wanted a “toasted ravioli”. He hit an intercom switch and said, “One TR.” As I waited for my order, I again glanced around the room. Above the steam table on the side wall were two very large paintings of Western scenes, cowboys on horses. I was told later that the artwork was owned by Gussie Busch and loaned to the restaurant years before. I don’t know if it’s true or not, but that was what I was told. Above the bar was a second floor with booths front to back. “This is a great place,” I thought. “I like it.”

Finally, my toasted ravioli arrived. It was unlike any ravioli dish I had ever seen. There were six plain meat ravioli that were actually toasted, with parmesan cheese sprinkled over the

When I saw the dish, I thought, “This has possibilities.” The ravioli was served with a cup of Bolognese sauce (a meat sauce originating in the city of Bologna, Italy). “This looks even better.” Then, I tasted my first toasted ravioli. “Wow, this is one of the best things I have ever eaten!” How come I had never heard of this before? Turns out, it originated in St. Louis. It became my go-to order whenever I went to Garavelli’s.

Sadly, Garavelli’s on Olive Street closed sometime in the mid-’70s, not sure when. “That’s OK,” I thought. “I’ll just go to another Garavelli’s to get my TR fix.”

It was then that I learned a sad truth. Even though there were several Garavelli’s in St. Louis, they were all separate operations. I could not find one that made toasted ravioli the same way as the Olive Street location. Even worse, what most restaurants call toasted ravioli today is nowhere near what I had originally tasted. What you get most of the time is breaded ravioli that is fried or deep fried and served with marinara, a basic tomato sauce. To me it’s like chuck steak versus filet mignon. What happened, St. Louis? What happened to real toasted ravioli? If there is any restaurant that can make a TR the way the Olive Street Garavelli’s made them, let me know. I will be a very grateful customer.

Vinny Carella, creator of Spring Power, has lived most of his adult life in St. Louis.

Graffiti Watch

SOMETIMES IT’S THE LITTLE THINGS THAT COUNT

What most restaurants call toasted ravioli today is nowhere near what I had originally tasted.

Kim Gardner Leaves Office

The beleaguered St. Louis Circuit Attorney quit Tuesday, nearly two weeks earlier than planned

Written by RYAN KRULL

St. Louis Circuit Attorney Kim Gardner announced her resignation on Tuesday, May 16 — and this time, it was effective immediately.

Gardner had previously announced she’d leave the office on June 1. Instead, on Tuesday, her office said she’d be ending her service “immediately,” in a statement released only about an hour before a hearing in the quo warranto case to remove her from office.

Gardner’s office said in the statement that she has been working with St. Louis County Prosecuting Attorney Wesley Bell to “ensure a comprehensive transition plan is in place to handle cases that prioritizes public safety.”

Gardner’s statement continued, “Effective immediately, Kimberly M. Gardner will end her service as the city of St. Louis Circuit Attorney. Ms. Gardner has been committed to serving the people of the city of St. Louis and has done all she can to ensure a smooth transition.”

The statement said that from now on, all further inquiries regarding cases in the city should be directed to Bell’s office.

But Bell’s spokesperson, Chris King, indicated the office was taken by surprise by the abrupt resignation. “We did not expect her to resign today,” King told reporters on Tuesday.

Prior to the resignation, King said, there had been “lots of meetings” between Bell’s staff and Gardner’s. Two prosecutors from the county were trained on the policies and procedures of Gardner’s office, King said. “We really want to get an open warrant office in the city of St. Louis.”

Yet in the hours immediately following Gardner’s resignation, it was unclear whether Bell had the authority to take the reins even

on a temporary basis — much less what happens after that.

Gardner emailed her resignation to Governor Mike Parson around 11:31 a.m.

Asked an hour later if it was fair to say no one was in charge of the office right now, King said, “I wouldn’t say that.”

A reporter asked who was in charge.

“It’s not our office,” King said. “We’re here to help as a transition team. If a judge says we can start charging cases, we’ll start charging cases.”

Before Gardner’s surprise announcement, Governor Mike Parson had been set to pick her replacement. His call drew 18 applicants. As of press time, his office said only that he would announce his choice for a replacement on Friday, May 19.

Gardner had been scheduled to sit for a deposition in the quo warranto case brought by Missouri Attorney General Andrew Bailey later this week. On Monday, Bailey revealed that Gardner was doing clinical work, apparently related to the advanced nursing program she’s enrolled in at Saint Louis University, on the same day that Judge Mike Noble held a contempt of court hearing earlier this month.

The RFT first broke the news of Gardner’s enrollment at SLU on May 3. Gardner has steadfastly refused to answer questions about what program she was enrolled in or the time commitment involved. State law says that circuit attorneys (as well as their assistants) must “devote their entire time and energy to the discharge of

their official duties” — which may have given Bailey an easy opening once he had Gardner under oath.

Gardner’s resignation now effectively pauses the quo warranto process, with a hearing rescheduled for next Tuesday, May 23. In the hearing immediately after Gardner resigned, all parties acted as if the case would be dismissed, but the judge said he wanted to “see what happens” before issuing a ruling. The current situation was described by various parties as “unprecedented” and “fluid.”

In the days before her resignation, critics continued to question Gardner’s management and judgment.

As just one example, her office faced criticism last week when it refused to charge the 33-year-old woman arrested by the St. Louis Metropolitan Police Department related to a weekend shooting on Cherokee Street after the annual Cinco de Mayo parade.

Police said that Amber Booker was one of two individuals who opened fire on Cherokee Street around 7:30 p.m. on May 6, wounding two 25-year-olds and causing a panic among the hundreds gathered on the street celebrating. Videos of the shooting circulated widely on social media.

The police applied for two assault and two armed criminal action charges against Booker, but the Circuit Attorney’s Office refused the charges, citing a “lack of evidence,” as well as victims refusing to assist. Booker was released from jail, which drew outrage. (When the second shooter, 33-year-old Darion Benton, was arrested the next day, he was charged with assault and armed criminal action and remains in custody.)

And the St. Louis circuit court will likely remain in chaos in the coming weeks regardless of Gardner’s departure. The courts are bottle-necked due to a lack of prosecutors after Gardner saw resignation after resignation in her final weeks.

Sturgeon Stewart’s case offers an example. Stewart faces a slew of charges, including two murder counts, two kidnapping counts, robbery and assault, all stemming from an August 2020 incident in the Mark Twain neighborhood. Sturgeon and another man alleg-

Kim Gardner abruptly resigned ahead of the June 1 date she had previously announced. | DANNY WICENTOWSKI

It’s unclear whether St. Louis County Prosecuting Attorney Wesley Bell has the authority to take the reins even on a temporary basis — much less what happens after that.

edly tied up two individuals and got into a gun battle with a third; Sturgeon’s alleged accomplice died in the incident.

That case was assigned to prosecutor Chris Desilets, who resigned from the Circuit Attorney’s Office on May 1. Replacing him on the case was Rufus Tate, a recent hire. But when the trial was scheduled to start last week, Tate was not ready and the date was pushed back to May 22.

In a different courtroom on the same day Sturgeon’s trial had to be pushed back, Judge Michael Noble wasn’t letting up on Gardner’s office for what he saw as its failure to provide a “specific answer to a specific question.”

The judge wanted to know who authorized Desilets, prior to his resignation, to drop and refile murder charges in the cases of Javonn Nettles and Andre Anderson. The two men are charged with murdering seven-year-old D’Myah Fleming and her father, Darrion Rankin-Fleming, near Saint Louis University in January 2021.

Dropping charges with the option to refile them is called a nolle prosequi. While it buys the prosecution more time to get a case in order, it can also leave defendants languishing in jail. Attorney General Bailey has accused Gardner’s office of abusing the nolle prosequi tactic.

At a hearing last week, Assistant Circuit Attorney Rob Huq gave Judge Noble a less than straightforward answer, saying that either Gardner or First Assistant Circuit Attorney Serena WilsonGriffin, or both, had told Desilets to file the dismissals.

Judge Noble accepted the response, though he wondered aloud why it was such a complicated reply to a basic question.

Later, Terry Niehoff, the defense attorney for Nettles, complained about what happened in court.

“They can’t even answer a simple question,” he said of the Circuit Attorney’s Office.

With a backlog of thousands of cases and the governor’s pick to replace Gardner as circuit attorney likely facing a steep learning curve, Niehoff’s summation of where the St. Louis courts are headed seems more apt than ever: “It’s going to get worse before it gets better,” he said. n

Transgender

Youth Barred from GenderAffirming Care

New legislation also requires people to play on the sports team of their sex at birth

Written by ANNELISE HANSHAW

This story was originally published in the Missouri Independent.

The Missouri House sent legislation to the governor’s desk last week barring transgender youth from beginning gender-affirming care.

The bill passed 108-50. Only three Republicans joined every Democrat in opposition: House Majority Leader Jon Patterson, a doctor; Representative Chris Sander, who is gay; and Representative Gary Bonacker.

Democratic Representative Peter Merideth of St. Louis asked Patterson, one of the legislature’s only physicians, why he dissented. Patterson commended the bill but said he can “see both sides of the issue.”

He said he trusted physicians and patients but not without some hesitation.

The bill originated in the Senate, gathering compromise language after a multiday filibuster by Democrats. The resulting legislation has a clause allowing those who have already begun treatment to continue. It also includes an expiration date on the ban on puberty blockers and crosssex hormones of four years. The ban on gender-affirming surgeries is permanent.

A version of the legislation passed by the House earlier this year did not contain those compromises.

“Last month, we sent a bill over to the Senate that I was and am extremely proud of, with protections that go even farther than the bill I bring before you today. … But because of little to no action over there, that piece of legislation will most likely die at six o’clock [last] Friday,” said Representative Brad Hudson (R-Cape Fair) the legislation’s sponsor.

Governor Mike Parson vowed to call a special session if the bill, and a limit on transgender athletes, did not make it to his desk by the time the legislature adjourned. Democrats rose in opposition to the bill to share stories about transgender loved ones.

Representative Doug Clemens (D-St.

Ann) said he grew up in a conservative, Irish-Catholic environment. It took him years to understand the gender-affirming care process, he said.

“I can’t allow (the legislature) to take the rights away from someone being themselves,” he said. “It’s a horrible thing that we do.”

Representative Maggie Nurrenbern (D-Kansas City) said she had “incredible” transgender kids as students when she was a teacher. Now, she has heard of families with transgender kids leaving the state.

“Some of our best and brightest kids that I had are leaving our state,” she said. “So I see this today as I walk in and think about what we’re doing here is that this is a bit of a farewell speech today for some of the families that we’ve come to know and love and respect.”

St. Louis Democrat Ian Mackey, who is gay, said he has been living with dread as the House approached passing the bill.

“When I say that I’m hurt as a member of the LGBTQ community, not nearly to the extent as these little kids are, I don’t care whether you meant to harm me or not,” he said. “I’m still harmed. And these kids are still harmed.”

In response, Republicans rose in defense of the measure and of their colleagues who pressed for its passage.

Representative Wendy Hausman (R-St. Peters) said her “heart breaks” for friends and family in the “transgender community.

“This is just to make sure that children do not make decisions that could affect the rest of their lives. They might not have all the information, and we want to make sure that they get that information,” she said.

After passing the health-care bill, the House voted 109-49 to send a bill to the governor restricting student athletes to competing according to their sex assigned at birth. Representative Jamie Burger (R-Benton) said the legislation

was a way to help female athletes.

“Biological males are bigger, they are stronger and they are faster,” he said. “The majority of women simply cannot compete.”

Merideth called the legislation “the epitome of bullying.”

Merideth said previous debates showed that young kids competed similarly, but males gained a competitive advantage after puberty. He asked Patterson why.

“The testosterone,” Patterson said. “It’s just the nature of human beings.”

Merideth asked what advantage a biological male child would have if he took puberty blockers.

The current Missouri State High School Activities Association rule allows transgender athletes to compete according to their gender identity once they have been on cross-sex hormones for a year.

“If puberty is the thing that is causing those things to play out in a way that really makes a difference in an athletic achievement, isn’t blocking puberty a way to get in the way of this happening?” Merideth asked.

Patterson responded: “You still have the height differences, the bone differences, the strength differences. You can’t block it completely.”

Merideth said endocrinologists, who specialize in hormones’ role in puberty, have told him otherwise.

Patterson still voted in favor of the legislation.

In a statement released after the House vote, Senator Greg Razer — a Kansas City Democrat and the chamber’s only openly gay member — called Tuesday a “sad day for the LGBTQ community.”

“We are all hurting,” he said, “but we will persevere just as we have at every point in our journey when government has acted on the wrong side of history. We will keep moving forward, and no law can stop that.” n

Rep Brad Hudson (R-Cape Fair). | ANNELISE HANSHAW/MO INDEPENDENT

Student Suspended for Recording Teacher Using Racial Slur

Mary Walton said the teacher used the n-word several times before she started recording

Written by ROSALIND EARLY

Last week, a video of a geometry teacher using a racial slur at Springfield’s Glendale High School went viral on Snapchat and Reddit. The teacher was immediately placed on administrative leave and on Monday, the school announced that the teacher, who was not identified, no longer works for the district.

The school also suspended the student who recorded the video, Mary Walton, 15, for violating the

Benton Park Residents Call for Stop Sign After Crash

South Jefferson Avenue has seen a number of crashes this year

Written by RYAN KRULL

After a car crash last week, Benton Park residents living on South Jefferson Avenue say their busy stretch of the road needs at least one more stop sign.

Last week, a group of neighbors living near the intersection of Jefferson Avenue and Lynch Street were outside surveying damage and doing what they could to help individuals who had just been involved in a car wreck. A Nissan sedan heading north on Jefferson had to swerve out of the way to avoid an SUV heading south that cut across lanes making a left turn onto Lynch.

The driver of the Nissan avoided being struck by the SUV but ran her car into a

district’s electronic device policy.

The district released a statement Monday saying that it stood by its decision to suspend the student: “Much speculation has occurred regarding student discipline related to a video recording of the unacceptable classroom incident. Student discipline is confidential, per federal law, and Springfield Public Schools cannot disclose specifics related to actions taken. The student handbook is clear, however, on consequences for inappropriate use of electronic devices. Any consequences applied per the scope and sequence would also consider if minors are identifiable in the recording and what, if any, hardships are endured by other students due to a violation of privacy with the dissemination of the video in question. SPS is confident that the district appropriately and promptly handled all matters related to what occurred at Glendale. We want our schools to be safe and welcoming learning environments. When students have concerns, they should follow the appropriate steps for reporting.”

In the video, the geometry teacher is heard asking why Black people can use the n-word but it is offensive if other people do it.

“I don’t like the word at all. But ... I don’t know it feels like when a Black person is using it toward another Black person. It’s the same ... how is it not still a derogatory word?” The teacher can be heard

saying in the video.

Walton later said that she started recording after the teacher had already used the n-word several times.

“I don’t get it,” the teacher says.

“Slave owners used to call them that,” a student says.

“Right, right, is the word n***er not allowed?” the teacher asks.

A student immediately interjects.

“I’m going to say right now as a teacher, if you want to keep your job — this isn’t a threat,” says one of the students.

“I’m not calling anyone a n***er,” the teacher replies. At this point, the camera pans up to show the teacher in front of a half-empty classroom.

“I understand,” the student says.

“I can say the word,” the teacher explains.

“Why are you saying that?” a student of color asks, while a woman off screen can be heard saying “no.”

The teacher eventually noticed Walton recording and told her to stop. Walton refused. Walton told KSHB that she did not post the video to social media. She shared it with her mom and one friend, but it spread from there.

According to a statement from Walton’s lawyer, Natalie Hull, Walton received the maximum punishment for the infraction, a three-day suspension.

“Mary saw a teacher do something wrong, and she documented it,” Hull says. “Language can be harmful, and Mary captured proof of her teacher, a person who is supposed to protect children, harming them through his use of a racial slur. If he had been hitting a student — or worse — would the school have reacted the same? Frankly, this school is exercising a chilling effect on all of the students by sending the message that they will get in trouble if they capture evidence of their teachers doing something wrong.”

Walton and Hull were advocating for the suspension to be lifted and the school to apologize, but based on the district’s statement, it was standing by its suspension decision. n

mostly be ignored.

Ward 8 Alderwoman Cara Spencer says that last week, she was emailing the City Department of Streets after parents of McKinley Middle School students voiced concerns about an uptick of crashes on Jefferson. One of the crashes involved five cars, two of which were totaled, in front of Sump Coffee in the 3700 block of Jefferson.

residential building. She suffered some minor scrapes requiring medical attention, but everyone in the car and the building was spared serious injury. The SUV left the scene.

Carole Dent lives next door to the building struck by the Nissan. The fence in her front yard sustained damage in the crash. She says this is the third time a car careening off Jefferson has struck her fence.

The intersection at Lynch and Jefferson ought to have a stop sign, Dent says.

Jer Wilcoxson says in the short time

he’s lived near the intersection since moving back to St. Louis from California, he’s seen multiple instances of motorists on Lynch collide with cars “just flying” down the five-lane Jefferson Avenue. “People are usually flying on freeways in California but not so much on the side streets,” Wilcoxson says. “St. Louis is a completely different city. Here it feels sedate on the highways, and it’s crazy on the side streets.”

He agrees with Dent about the need for a stop sign, though, this being St. Louis, he can’t help but wonder if it would

Earlier this month, Spencer wrote in an email to Department of Streets Director Betherny Williams that “there have been 3 serious accidents in the past 10 days at or around the intersection of S Jefferson and Chippewa.” She asked Williams for more details about plans to invest in the street to make it safer.

In reply, Spencer was told that Williams was out of town and that “there is an internal group reviewing the crash sites to determine next steps and how we move forward.” The reply went on to say that the department was not ready to share the work with the alders or the public.

Spencer says she felt the response from the department left much to be desired.

“I’m dismayed that they’re not ready to communicate to the alderpeople or the general public about what they’re doing about it,” Spencer says. n

In Benton Park, residents want an additional stop sign to prevent crashes. | RYAN KRULL

Screengrab from a student recording of her teacher using a racial slur. | VIA SCREENGRAB

Missouri Gone Wild

A new book celebrates Cornfed Missourians and the Midwest

Words and photos by REUBEN

HEMMER

The Midwest often carries the stereotype of being “flyover country” filled with farmland and simple living. Though there are truths to this stereotype, the reality of the Midwest is far more complex. This area contains fascinating stories, eccentric characters and many lessons. The majority of my youth was spent in Belleville, Illinois, and it took me many years to appreciate the setting I grew up in. I was a military brat and joined the mili-

tary myself, which led me to move to places like Germany, South Korea and New Orleans. Only then, when I was far away from home, did I realize how special the Midwest truly is.

The blessing and the curse of the Midwest is that there are no frills, and what you see is what you get. However, there is something so delightfully genuine within that reality. Inspired by spending many nights under neon lights in small-town bars, watching riding lawnmower demolition derbys, attending action-packed rodeos and hanging around legendary south city personalities, one day I thought it would be fun to pick up a camera and attempt to document our Midwestern culture.

A few years later, I was surprised to find myself taking photos for the Riverfront Times — mainly for a column titled “Missouriland,” which portrays the people, places and events that make Missouri uniquely Missouri.

It began with covering Mark Mc-

Closkey’s sad, surreal and gun-toting barbecue and came to include rallies for transgender rights at the Missouri State Capitol. The biggest lesson I have learned from taking photos across the region is that a cultural divide is constantly being pushed, yet the truth is we are really not all that different from each other.

We live in a time where neighbors refrain from speaking to one another, and people are wary of strangers — yet I believe we could learn so much from talking to the person next to us. My hope is to display these lessons learned in my first photo book titled Cornfed: Images of the Midwest and Rural America. The book contains nearly 200 photos of people, places and festivities shot in an objective light. Many of the photos in Cornfed have appeared in the Riverfront Times, and the book includes images taken in the Midwest and neighboring states from 2019 to 2023, a deeply polarizing and transformative period of time in America.

The book is organized by seasons with the intention of creating the feeling of a year spent in the central and southern United States, from its brutal winters to its humid summers. This all came to fruition thanks to friend and native south St. Louisan Jessica Devine Wilson. Wilson is a publisher and editor for a German publishing house called Snap Collective, which has satellite locations all over Europe.

Snap Collective recently opened its very first American location in the Bay Area, where Wilson (now living in Oakland) is tasked with working with artists of all disciplines to publish limited-edition handmade books of their work.

Wilson has made it a mission to bring representation to Midwestern artists and reached out to make this book. Snap Collective will also soon be publishing books by notable St. Louis artists Josh Levi and Yowshien Kuo, further representing the creativity and beauty of the Midwest. n

A CELEBRATION OF THE UNIQUE AND FASCINATING ASPECTS OF OUR HOME

Clinging to their Cars

A modest proposal — to go without a car for a single day — was too much for many St. Louis officials

BY EVIE HEMPHILL

Even a decade ago, on the occasion of my 30th birthday, I was already arguably an aggrieved cyclist. For a long time now, my husband and I have been a one-car family, and with two jobs where we both have to be in person, that means I mostly bike or take the bus. It’s not easy.

And so back in 2013, I remember commenting (perhaps a bit stridently, in retrospect) to a group of friends gathered at my apartment that far too many drivers in St. Louis make commuting without a car incredibly stressful. My car-dependent associates mostly nodded empathetically, kindly sighing or perhaps taking another bite of ice cream cake to keep things moving.

But one friend very suddenly and shockingly lost it.

She was so upset at my share-the-road grumble that she stood up from the couch, yelled at me to get a car, insisted that when I am biking I am in her way — and then left the room furious, before a mutual friend intervened and gently took her home.

For a long time I chalked that mild (and eventually mended) drama up to a variety of factors, not least among them the idea that some celebratory alcohol was at play. But now, 10 jaded years later, my sense is that her reaction was not, in fact, a one-off. Rather, it was an individual embodiment of a simple cultural fact that I fear is truer now than it was even a decade ago: St. Louis is for drivers.

Yes, the drivers are the ones who really matter to most of those with power and influence in this town and region. And if you’re not inside a private automobile, you are, quite simply, utterly screwed.

During the week of my 40th birthday in March, this sobering reality was on my mind even more than usual. I had the day off from

work, and I had some fun plans in place. But as it approached, my heart was with Janae Edmondson, who had just had both of her legs amputated after she came to St. Louis to compete in a volleyball tournament and dared to take a walk with her family downtown. My heart was also with my coworker’s wife, Heyxel Jenkins, a new American whose life was

to fend for himself after being hit by a driver while bicycling in a crosswalk. This 13-year-old was hit, and then abandoned, by a socalled adult with a license — apparently a license to do whatever the heck he wants, with impunity.

The St. Louis region has seen so many of its residents (and visitors, in the case of Edmondson) maimed or lost entirely — just over the course of a few short months. And so again, here I was on my 40th birthday, feeling hopeless about how we move forward.

Then I remembered that a friend had recently shared an attempt in

I asked nearly 50 area leaders to go a single day without their cars. In the days and weeks that followed, I heard from 16 (and eventually four others who reached out to me unprompted), which was mildly encouraging early on. But in the end? Only nine people made good on the challenge, even though they had a solid four weeks to get it done. Nine. At a time when this violent crisis could not be more pressing.

dramatically changed this past fall after getting hit by a driver while bicycling home from work. She spent nearly a week in the hospital with a crushed ankle and broken pelvis. I thought of my friend Karl Mitchell and his son, who were hit this winter on their cargo bike despite having retreated to the sidewalk. And, of course, I was thinking about a young graduate of the Earn-ABike program at my employer, the nonprofit St. Louis BWorks, a child left on the side of the road

another Midwestern city, Cleveland, to have local leaders rely on public transit for a week or so. She commented that she couldn’t imagine St. Louisans attempting such a car-free feat without “succumbing to despair.” But surely, I thought, I could get some buy-in on such a PR-friendly stunt.

When I threw the idea of a week without a car out there on the ol’ bird app, it seemed to go over OK. But one particular reaction, from the wise Aisha Sultan of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch, caught my attention. “Ask people to try it just for one day, Evie,” she wrote. “Let’s see how many takers you get.”

So I followed her advice and de-

cided to start small, sending individual emails to nearly 50 St. Louis-area leaders. Linking them to a fuller explanation of what I was up to, I asked them to consider my modest request to go car-free for a day “because you care about traffic violence.”

“Will you commit to getting around our region without a car for *one single day* sometime this month — and sharing publicly what your experience was like and any ways in which it affects your thinking about traffic violence and the rights of children, and all people, to move around safely in their community?” I wrote.

“Those of us pushing for years for change are tired of all of the talk and promises. It’s time for results. I am asking you to walk/bike/transit a day in our shoes, experience the deep urgency and fear we do (especially those trying to help children survive and thrive), and then use your power to fix this ongoing traffic violence pandemic.”

In the days and weeks that followed, I heard from 16 area leaders (and eventually four others who reached out to me unprompted), which was mildly encouraging early on. But in the end? Only nine of nearly 50 area leaders made good on the challenge, even though they had a solid four weeks to get it done. Nine. At a time when this violent crisis could not be more pressing.

I am grateful for these nine folks, who range from a local school board member to my alderwoman to a St. Louis County council member. I am also grateful for their frank reflections about both the joys and the insane challenges of doing this thing for even one day — a thing so many people with fewer resources in our region have to do in order to simply survive every single day. But overall, I came away from

Continued on pg 17

Anyone using alternative forms of transit in St. Louis, be it a bike or a bus, knows to keep a way eye out for cars. | BRADEN MCMAKIN

this haphazard little challenge of mine feeling discouraged and also wary of easy promises.

It’s easy to say you will commit to a challenge in solidarity with and reverence for those whose lives have been irrevocably changed or outright stolen by traffic violence in St. Louis. It’s a lot harder to actually complete an intended or promised task — and a significant subset of those who expressed interest or plans to do so in March simply seem to have not gotten it done.

I get that people are busy. I also get that this task is harder and frankly more dangerous if you have children who must be carted safely from one location to another (as a longtime teacher of bike classes for children, I really do understand the concerns!). But perhaps the thing I will never get over is the complete lack of response from anyone I reached out to who is paid to be a leader of our street, highway or transit operations.

From the city streets department, to East-West Gateway Council of Governments, to the Missouri Department of Transportation, the silent message, to me, was resoundingly clear: We do not care.

I had well-meaning folks reach out about the car-free challenge,

a couple of them suggesting that we extend it into May for National Bike Month. But my heart just wasn’t in that idea, if I’m being honest. National Bike Month is cool and positive. This, in contrast (I thought), was supposed to be about solidarity and sitting with what we ask of those outside of automobiles to endure day in, day out. I can’t just flip a switch and turn this into a marketing tactic for adaptation by the shiny and savvy and powerful.

In the meantime, very little

Those Who Dared

BY SARAH FENSKE

Traffic-related deaths spiked during the pandemic, both in St. Louis and across the U.S., and a long simmering public health issue suddenly became a major focus. The terrifying behavior of drivers around the metro has only given fuel to the fire. You could even argue it was the issue that toppled St. Louis Circuit Attorney Kim Gardner. Yet while Evie focuses, rightly, on the leaders who chose not to take up her car-free challenge, I was intrigued by the ones who did. Even beyond the angry and distracted drivers who terrorize our roadways, the region is a frustratingly complicated place to get around if you don’t have a car, with infre-

quent and incomplete bus service in most neighborhoods outside of the central core, and road design that prioritizes cars over pedestrian and bicyclist safety. When I see my fellow moms at bus stops, trying to get their kids to childcare before they go to work, I wonder how difficult it must be to ride the proverbial mile in their shoes. I can’t imagine trying to get my kids to daycare, school and athletic practice without a car, much less squeezing in a day of work and meetings around those obligations. I was genuinely curious how the people who ran Evie’s gauntlet had pulled it off.

Over the course of a few weeks, I

seems to change, except that traffic violence continues to drastically increase in our region and around America.

I will always find joy in my bus rides and bike commutes and walks around this city. There is still much to love here. And I will always seek to spread this joy to local kids and peers, who deserve to explore their communities safely and joyfully, like all of us. But every day I am afraid we will not make it home. Every single day now. The situation has be-

come demonstrably worse in the past 10 years. And for the most part, it feels like our leaders do not care enough to act with urgency and depth. I am tired of promises. We need change and results now.

Evie Hemphill is the programs director for St. Louis BWorks, which provides free bike and computer courses that inspire children ages 8 to 17 to pursue their dreams, care for the world around them and explore new possibilities through experiential learning.

followed up with challenge participants to get their thoughts. I was unsurprised to learn how many had to choose their days of going car-free with extreme care — not a single participant managed to handle a normal day of ferrying kids around without one! But I was also touched by the effort they made and the many thoughtful reflections they shared.

Here are some of the highlights.

Liberation in South City

Karisa Gilman-Hernandez and her husband have long been a one-car family — out of habit more than principle. “We live like we’re poorer than we are, which I’m OK with,” says Gilman-Hernandez, the city’s 15th Ward committeewoman and a community organizer for Dutchtown South Community Corporation. “When we first moved to St. Louis city, he was a graduate assistant and I was

a part-time retail manager. Now that we could carry a car note, we’re like, ‘Eh, we’re used to it.’”

The result has been that Gilman-Hernandez, who hates driving, did a lot of it. She’d drop her husband at work and then double

Continued on pg 18

Author Evie Hemphill with St. Louis BWorks Earn-a-Bike graduates at Patrick Henry Downtown Academy Elementary School. | COURTESY EVIE HELPHILL

It wasn’t easy, but local officials who went car-free for a day came away with new understanding

Karisa Gilman-Hernandez on her e-bike. | COURTESY KARISA GILMAN-HERNANDEZ

CAR-FREE CHALLENGE

Continued from pg 17

back past their home to take herself to her office. All the while, she felt serious anxiety.

She’d given some thought to getting an e-bike and using that to get to work, but it wasn’t until the car-free challenge that she took the plunge and bought a used one.

“I’ll get excited about something, and then I’ll never do it again,” she explains. “I didn’t want that to happen with this bike. The challenge gave me a free pass. I thought, ‘I can do it one day’ and after that day, if I’m like, ‘I can’t do this,’ it’ll be OK. Because I only did it for the challenge.”

Gilman-Hernandez approached her inaugural e-bike commute with great trepidation. “I told my husband, ‘According to Google maps, it’s 15 minutes, so if you don’t hear from me in 30, this is my route, come find me.’”

But, she stresses, it was fine. And though she’ll quickly concede St. Louis drivers can be terrifying, she also realized she found biking alongside them far less terrifying than driving.

She now regularly e-bikes to work — and she feels liberated. It’s not just the release from a situation she found stressful; she also feels a new willingness to stop along the way and explore. She found real joy stopping at the local school’s “neighborhood coffee corner”; once she didn’t have to worry about parking, it was easy to stop and chat for a bit.

She also likes the time alone with her thoughts.

“I don’t listen to music because I want to hear what’s going on around me,” she explains. “It has pushed me to thinking things through. I’m just way more relaxed.

“It definitely has been a net positive.”

New Awareness in Maplewood

A busy mom of two, St. Louis County Councilwoman Lisa Clancy originally aimed high for her carfree day. “I started to poke around with bus routes to see what that’s like for someone who has to figure that out, and I got flustered,” she admits. “It’s complicated!”

In a town like Maplewood with limited bus service, the kid component adds a whole layer. “The complication of getting a twoyear-old on and off a bus — that’s tough. Even if you can navigate public transportation getting them to or from school, what if

there’s an emergency?”

So Clancy stayed on foot for her challenge day. And while she enjoyed a day free of cars, she knows the privilege of living where she does. “I live in a very walkable community. I can walk to the grocery store, the coffee shop, the playground, the library. And I have a bike!”

She thinks about mothers who have to use the bus system to get kids to daycare, or people who can’t walk to the library or a grocery store. “A lot of things about our infrastructure favor cars,” she says. “We’re not equipped to efficiently get people around to where they need to be without a car. We have buses, MetroLink, and other services as well, but it seems like a high misery cost for people who need to use those services reliably in terms of time, planning, and even physical fitness.”

If Every Day Could Be Spring Break

On a normal day, Emily Jane Hubbard’s time in the car starts as early as 6:40 a.m., when she climbs in to drop her middle schoolers off for their first class.

“I feel bad that we don’t send them on the bus, but our stop picks up at 6:15, and we have a commitment to rest in our family that beats environmental concerns,” explains Hubbard, a member of the Board of Education for the city schools and a Carondelet-based pastor’s wife. “So I take them to school and drive back home, noting all the cars that have followed the same Grand-Gravois route that we take, wondering why we aren’t carpooling.”

After that, it’s a busy day of sharing carpool duties with her husband for their elementary school kids, who have a 9 a.m. start time, before getting to her

own jobs (she teaches as an adjunct at Saint Louis University and University of Health Sciences and Pharmacy). Once she’s gotten the kids from school, she’s ready to be done with vehicles.

“On a perfect day, I don’t have to leave the house any more after that. But if we have church stuff or there’s a school board meeting, I’ll use the car to get to those places too,” she explains.

Hubbard chose to do the carfree challenge on her kids’ spring break. “I still had to teach at SLU that week, but I didn’t have to take my kids to school,” she recalls. “That day, I just got ready to go, walked 0.2 miles to the bus stop and hopped on a bus (the 70) and just went straight up Grand. And then I took the bus home from the stop right by the crosswalk sidewalk at SLU and walked home from the stop.”

She loved it. “It was amazing to not have the mental load of driving added to my day,” she explains over email. “I had to plan better to make sure I had enough time to catch the bus and for the longer

bus ride, and had a sweaty fast walk to catch the approaching bus home and not have to wait an additional 15 minutes (plus the 30-minute ride home) to get home to my family.” Even so, she found much to enjoy: “It was clear that the regular bus riders had a sense of community, the bus drivers had a great attitude and brightened my day, and I cannot stress enough what a relief it was for someone else to be the driver on our troubled city streets.”

If only it would be possible outside of school breaks. Hubbard blames in part the city’s reliance on school choice even within the public system, which means families can have three different start times and three different bus routes even when the kids originate from the same household. She writes, “My first takeaway, as a school board member and a parent, is that we need to figure out a solution to our three-tier bus system in SLPS, so every day can be like spring break. My second takeaway is that going around the bus when it is trying to get back into traffic is so rude.

“My third takeaway was that I could put the [Metro Transit] app on my older kids’ smartphones, and they could have way more freedom (to at least go up and down Grand) this summer without my turning into a chauffeur.

“But my biggest takeaway was how much taking the bus caused me to slow down, to take time, and to be with people not of my choosing and yet feel connected by our common needs. Until we can fix the school issue, I won’t be able to go car free every day, but I certainly plan to take the bus to get up and down Grand as often as I can.”

Failure in Webster Groves

Laura Arnold, the mayor of Webster Groves, was asked by a constituent to participate in the challenge and says she “readily agreed.” While Arnold frequently has car-free days where she walks around Webster, she decided to take things a step further and choose a day when she’d have to rely on public transportation.

“I knew that there would be challenges because bus service is significantly limited in Webster,” she later explained on Twitter. But even she was surprised by just how limited it was. Attempting to use transit to attend a monthly meeting at a restaurant, she plugged into the Metro trip

Continued on pg 20

Emily Jane Hubbard on a bus. | COURTESY EMILY JANE HUBBARD

A group of Earn-A-Bike students perform safety checks during a summer class in Forest Park. | COURTESY EVIE HEMPHILL

CAR-FREE CHALLENGE

app — only to find out that it recommended she walk all or most of the way.

She gave up and tried a different day, which featured a meeting of the region’s mayors. The Metro trip app found a route that would take 86 minutes instead of the 22 she’d spend by car. It felt impossible: “Given what else I had on the schedule that day, spending three hours in transit was not feasible.”

Arnold realized she had to give up on the idea of incorporating public transit.

“I won’t bore you with the details of my other failed options,” she tweeted. “Let’s just say all required at least doubling travel time and leaving gaps in my day to accommodate bus schedules. The bottom line is that I failed this challenge when I required the use of public transportation.

“Why? There are both individual and structural reasons. First, I prioritized my needs, especially my time. That is quite a luxury. Even when choosing particular days, I got to opt out if it did not fit my schedule. So many of our community members don’t have that choice.

“Second, the existing bus lines are limited. The system in St. Louis County is largely set up to go east/ west rather than north/south. You can do north/south only by spending a lot of time going east/west. While that is not news to anyone, it matters in thinking about use.

“Third, the frequency of buses means that timing any arrival/departure is really challenging.”

Arnold finished with a few takeaways. “A couple of things that I learned: I am not nearly as committed to public transportation as I gave myself credit for. Yes, I take MetroLink downtown and believe in the idea of public transportation. But my personal commitment to using it is insufficient. I’ll work on that. It is not easy to use public transportation from my community. Limited lines and infrequent buses make access to the entire Metro system more challenging than it should be. I’ve got constituents who want to limit the number of cars in our community. I don’t know how we do that without more accessible public transportation.

“My experiment failed even without having to deal with delays, rerouting or mechanical issues. What might life be like for the regular user who sees these challenges all the time?”

Her conclusion: “While I abso-

lutely failed this challenge, I did learn some things. Most importantly, we’ve got to do better.”

The Reluctant Driver

Former alderman Bill Stephens didn’t get his license until his mid20s. At age 16, a friend was driving him home from a Lady Gaga concert when they were hit by a drunk driver, an incident that initially left Stephens too scared to learn how to drive.

“I would take two buses and both trains to get from Hazelwood to Webster University to audit courses, oftentimes sleeping on dorm room floors because I’d missed the bus,” he recalls. “Eventually I moved a mile from Webster’s campus and would walk — rain, sleet or snow.”

Stephens now drives and frequently travels on I-44 or I-55 from his home in south city to meetings downtown. He’s also chair of the Missouri Democratic LGBTQ+ Caucus, which requires frequent trips to Jefferson City, and for his car-free challenge day, he was able to take a charter bus to the state Capitol. “Though I prefer Amtrak over buses, both allow me to work or catch up on reading,” he explains in an email.

While his day without a car went fine, he’s focused on bigger issues, as he explains by email:

“As a young man, I’ve had the pleasure of seeing how mass transit works in Chicago; Dallas; Kansas City; Washington, D.C.; and more. Once you look behind the curtain of public office, you can never forget what you’ve seen; I’ve annoyed my fiance more than once by stopping to take pictures or jot down notes of another city’s approach to infrastructure and transit.

“But the city of St. Louis — and indeed, the St. Louis metro area — are at a significant disadvantage when it comes to mass transit. The Missouri Assembly intentionally restricts funding for mass transit … and keeps the municipal government from having a seat at the Bi-State Development table, which works with representatives and senators from Missouri and Illinois. And as you can imagine, the state assembly is all too happy to let people point the finger of blame at the City of St. Louis, which has little direct authority in the matter of mass transit.

“My biggest takeaway: Mass transit has become another wedge issue used to validate the stranglehold our state assembly has on it. But that is only part of the issue: The U.S. could and should be a

shining star of mass transit at every level of government, but has intentionally failed to do so. Who gets hurt when the government is negligent? Those with the least options available to them.”

His Everyday Routine

When it comes to getting around the city, former south city alderman Dan Guenther does it all — except, these days, drive. “I mix transportation between bicycling, walking, Lyft/Uber and our bus system,” he explains. “If I need to work downtown, I have easy access to the 30, 11 and 10 lines of Metro, which all get me to the Civic Center. From the Civic Center, you can get to every part of our region.” He often bikes to work and takes the 30 home at night. For him, the car-free challenge was simply business as usual.

Guenther says the hardest part of being car-free is late-night bus service. “The bus I use most often, the 30 line, stops running around 8 p.m., so anything later than that I need to walk or bike to reach another line that runs later.”

But the car-free life also has major perks. Asked what’s the best, Guenther responds, “The people I meet while riding the bus system. There are a lot of stories and random conversations while standing at a bus stop and waiting.

“My favorite is a retired bus driver that rides the 11 line on Jefferson Avenue. He gives a recital of what businesses are at every bus stop and what lines you can connect to at each location. Another ‘best’ thing is talking to people that have complaints about our city and being able to direct them on how to fix problems or let them know what steps the city is taking to make their situation better.”

That said, Guenther’s not surprised that many of his now-former colleagues can’t replicate his routine for even a single day.

“Being a public official pulls you in many different directions, usually with very little time between meetings or appointments,” he says. “I feel I am lucky to live in a neighborhood with very good access to many bus lines, allowing me to travel to different areas of the city in a relatively short time.”

He hopes others give the carfree life a try. “I would hope more residents realize that public transit is easy to use and more reliable than in the recent past. The rates are very affordable ($1 per ride), and if you have a single destination or just want to explore a new area, using public transit allows

residents a chance to sit back, enjoy a ride and let someone else do the driving.”

He Had to Do It

Michael Browning was running for alderman (successfully, it should be pointed out) at the time he volunteered for the car-free challenge. The issues it raised were important to him. From 2012 until the pandemic allowed him to work from home, he regularly commuted by MetroLink, biking or walking. But as he found himself pressed for time during the campaign, he turned to the family car much more frequently.

Doing the car-free challenge during the campaign proved to be uniquely challenging — but also an eye-opener. “I discovered a lot of the infrastructure I knew was lacking was even more dangerous than I thought it was,” Browning acknowledges.

His ward, which includes a broad swath of the Central West End and Forest Park Southeast, may seem pedestrian- and bikefriendly, but Browning quickly found himself in harrowing situations (Lindell was particularly “terrifying,” he says) and frustrated by the lack of bike-friendly parking.

He understands why many public officials simply ducked the challenge. “I’m not surprised,” he says. “Our city is so built around car dependency it’s daunting to even try to do this for a day.”

Yet Browning wants St. Louis to do better.

“I was told by my campaign manager and my wife, ‘You don’t actually have to do this.’ I told them, ‘Yes, I do,’” he recalls. “‘I have to put myself there and carry out what I’ve been talking about on the campaign trail — and to tell people this is possible.’ Even then, it was difficult to do.” n

Michael Browning on his bike. | COURTESY MICHAEL BROWNING

CALENDAR

BY RIVERFRONT TIMES STAFF

THURSDAY 05/18

The Bright Side

Stereotypes lead to assumptions and conclusions that may not be true and can make people feel demeaned, excluded and unseen. Sometimes stereotypes lead people to ostracize or hurt others, and sometimes they can be used to remind us all why they are so harmful. Such is the case with Celeste Lecesne’s one-act, oneperson play The Absolute Brightness of Leonard Pelkey. Joe Hanrahan plays all the characters in the short, precisely developed script, now on stage at the Kranzberg Black Box Theatre (501 North Grand Boulevard, 314-533-0367). A grizzled old detective introduces us to Leonard, a teenager who has gone missing. He found out about him when Helen, a comely hairdresser, and her daughter, Phoebe, came to the police station to file a report. Leonard wasn’t Helen’s son, but she had welcomed him into her home. Phoebe wasn’t as enthusiastic about Leonard joining the family, though we learn that she protected him like a big sister. Leonard was flamboyant and unabashedly comfortable in his skin, a trait some people in the tiny, insular community couldn’t appreciate. Discomfort like that happens all the time — but it should never be a reason to take somebody’s life. The Midnight Company’s latest offering runs nightly through Saturday, May 20, with the show kicking off at 8 p.m. each night. Tickets are $20 to $25 and can be purchased via MetroTix.

Skin City

Though Lola van Ella no longer lives in St. Louis, she has made an indelible impression on the number of shaking ta-tas the city sees in any given year — and that’s a beautiful thing. The 12th rendition of what is arguably her most notable performance, the annual Show-Me Burlesque & Vaudeville Festival, hits town this week. The three-day festival is all about glam, glitz and more talent than you can shake a stick at. Tune in for the sexy fun at the Casa Loma

Ballroom (3354 Iowa Avenue, 314282-2258) for top performances from stars local and national, such as Auralie Wilde, Frankie Fictitious, Jeez Loueez and Foxy la Feelion. The show begins at 7:30 p.m. on Thursday, May 18, and runs through Saturday, May 20, and tickets cost $15 to $140. Get the full details at showmeburlesque.com.

Cryptid Creepin’

Kick your weekend off a day early with the perfect mix of literature and laughs. Pulitzer Prize-winning humorist Dave Barry will be at the Clayton High School Theatre (1 Mark Twain Circle, Clayton; 314-854-6600) this Thursday, May 18, to discuss and read from his latest book, Swamp Story. The novel concerns a Florida man stuck running a failing bait shop in the Everglades who decides his

ticket to riches is through a social media hoax spreading the word about a Bigfoot/Yeti/Loch Ness Monster-type creature haunting his swamp. Like many plans hatched in the Sunshine State, the only problem is that it works too well. If Barry’s track record is any indication, hilarity will ensue. The event starts at 7 p.m. and tickets, which include a copy of the book, are $32 for one person, $37 for two. More info at left-bank.com.

FRIDAY 05/19 Art of Work

The new “workers’ opera” from Bread & Roses Missouri doesn’t have fancy lighting or an impressive set. It was designed to be portable, says Executive Director Emily Kohring, so the staging intentionally includes no frills.

But what it does have is the verisimilitude that only comes from drawing on the life experiences of Americans who are all too often forgotten on our theatrical stages — in this case, workers at the STL8 Amazon Fulfillment Center in St. Peters. They not only gave their stories to writer/director Mariah Richardson, but a few also helped in the creation of the show, and two are even among the 10 performers in it. Its name — Workers’ Opera: Blue Light Special — is inspired by the lights that spin on the warehouse floor when they’re not hustling fast enough, which should give you an idea of how harrowing things get. Local powerhouse Celia provides the musical accompaniment. Fittingly, the show is being mounted at CWA Local 6300 (2258 Grissom Drive, Maryland Heights; 314-9910200). Both the Friday, May 19, and Saturday, May 20, performances

Show-Me Burlesque & Vaudeville Festival returns for its 12th year. | THEO WELLING

will begin at 7 p.m., and Kohring says they’ll last about 45 minutes. “We offer tickets on a sliding scale; nobody will be turned away because they can’t pay,” she adds. “All are welcome, and we really mean that!” Details and tickets at tinyurl.com/workersopera.

Grab a Bite

Celebrate everything that is great about the Maplewood and Richmond Heights food scenes this weekend at the 15th Annual Taste of Maplewood Street Festival. Held on Friday, May 19, from 6 to 10 p.m. and Saturday, May 20, from 12 to 8 p.m., this big block party aims to bring neighbors together while also supplying visitors with a small sample of all that the area has to offer. In addition to downing tasty bites from local restaurants, guests can stop by the tents at this free festival and do a little shopping. There will also be two stages set up with plenty of entertainment options — enjoy performances from No Alternative, Power Play, Jamal Selesi and more, or catch the Fox Performing Arts Teen Competition on Saturday afternoon. Visit midcountychamber. org for more information, including the entertainment sched -

ule, details on where to park and a list of vendors scheduled to be on site.

SATURDAY 05/20

Room for Improv-ment

Comedy and theater fans who enjoy laughs, improv and a good melody you can tap your toes to would be wise to check out The One Four Fives, who regularly present improvised musicals at St. Louis’ Improv Shop (3960 Chouteau Avenue, 314-652-2200). Featuring the improvisational and vocal talents of Ashley Rube, Anna Bushlack, Andy Sloey, Boo Kersting, Darrell Barber, Nathan Maul, Jenn Korman and Ryan Myers, the team delivers thoroughly entertaining, in-the-moment musical comedy with an improvisational bent. As with traditional improv, the group pulls from audience-suggested themes, locations and details to create a laugh-filled, 30-minute musical following a recognized story arc. After a short break, the team returns and creates a “day in the life” musical based on an interview with a randomly selected audience member. The One Four

Fives bring the show to the Improv Shop one to two weekends per month; at a recent event they performed a genuinely entertaining musical about the workings of a fertility clinic that was filled with pleasing tunes, plentiful laughs and surprising twists. If you are in the mood for clever, topical musical theater that’s unpredictable but always funny, you’ll want to catch the performance this Saturday, May 20. The show starts at 8 p.m., and tickets are $12. For more information, visit theimprovshop.com.

Who Let the Dogs Out?

The annual and beloved Bark in the Park event returns this week for its 28th year, this time at Tower Grove Park (4257 Northeast Drive, 314-771-2679) on Saturday, May 20. The pet festival is sponsored by the Humane Society. In addition to the expected festival fare, the event features a 5K race and one-mile walk. When you register for the race, which costs $35, you get a Bark in the Park T-shirt, Purina goodie bag and access to all the festival activities. Bark in the Park starts at 8 a.m. and ends at 1 p.m. Head over to the Turkish

WEEK OF MAY 18-24

TUESDAY 05/23 Get Active

Missouri is all kinds of messed up lately. At the time of this blurb’s writing, we’re waiting for the likelihood that our governor will sign legislation to ban gender-affirming care for new transgender patients and bar trans youth athletes from playing on sports teams that match their gender identity. Sometimes it feels like there’s not much we can do as our GOP-controlled legislature wreaks its havoc. But there are things you can do, and here’s a good one: On Tuesday, May 23, join Rebel & Roar for Pound & Pour: A Fundraiser for the Shades Project. Attendees will take part in a “cardio jam session” to benefit the grassroots group, which works to provide safety to trans and queer people of color. The workout sesh to benefit Shades will take place at the Little Bevo (4751 Morganford Road, 314-833-8889) at 6 p.m. and wraps up with drinks. Tickets cost $25 to $45 and can be purchased through Eventbrite.

Pavilion to join in the fun. More info at towergrovepark.org.

The Absolute Brightness of Leonard Pelkey is a one-man show. | COURTESY PHOTO Tower Grove Park will host Bark in the Park this year. | VIA FLICKR/MINDA HAAS KUHLMANN

Night Life

St. Louis finally has outstanding after-hours eats thanks to Up Late

Written by CHERYL BAEHR

Up Late

1904 South Vandeventer Avenue. Thurs.-Sun.

8 p.m.-4 a.m. (Closed Mon. through Wed.)

For the past couple of years, Jason Bockman and Nathan Wright would do two things while working late nights at World’s Fair Donuts: bake to ready innumerable doughnuts for the shop’s storefront and delivery business, and marvel at just how many people passed through the Shaw-Vandeventer intersection in the middle of the night. For them, the graveyard shift was par for the course. As owner and employee, respectively, of the iconic south St. Louis doughnut shop, working through the middle of the night was a necessary part of making sure their wares were fresh and ready when World’s Fair opened at six in the morning. However, they were shocked to see how many passersby were also out and about into the wee hours of the night, and as they wondered what they were up to, they got to thinking. Surely, those folks had to be hungry.

That theory is the raison d’etre for Up Late, Bockman and Wright’s Thursday through Sunday, late night to early morning venture that opened inside World’s Fair Donuts this past February. For St. Louis diners, the walk-up window finally fills the void for a non-chain, middle-of-the-night eatery — a type of place that has all but vanished in the wake of the pandemic.

For Wright, who is the chef, coowner and face of Up Late, the restaurant fills a different kind of void, one that arose within him when he realized his long-held dream of becoming a basketball coach was actually not his path. Though Wright has felt at home in the kitchen since he was a kid, he never considered it a career move and instead spent his undergraduate and graduate studies working toward a job on the coaching and

management side of basketball. He seemed to be well on his way to achieving that goal; in his last year of graduate school at Saint Louis University, he was working as the Billikens’ graduate assistant and was gathering all the credentials he’d need to succeed in the field.

However, Wright could not shake the feeling that something was off. Though he’d been working under the assumption that basketball was his calling, he came to the realization that he no longer wanted to move forward on that path. He decided to withdraw from his graduate program, which left him questioning who he was and what he wanted to do with his life. As he worked to figure this out, he found himself in need of a job and ended up working for Bockman at Strange Donuts. The pair instantly clicked, and Wright knew that there was something to the arrangement more than a meantime gig, an inkling that came to be one night when Bockman turned to him and said, “Why don’t we open a restaurant?”

Bockman had always wanted to do something more with the

World’s Fair building, which he purchased from its original owners in 2020, than simply sell doughnuts from 6 a.m. until 2 p.m. Wright had come to the realization that he wanted to run his own business. Together, they decided to run with the idea of a late-night concept, and Bockman

handed the reins to Wright, empowering him to come up with the ideas and menu that would become Up Late.

Wright admits that his first menu for Up Late had a little bit of everything; Bockman reined those ideas in, which resulted in a small

The carne asada tacos include onions and cilantro and are served on corn tortillas. | MABEL SUEN

Nathan Wright is chef and co-owner of Up Late. | Mabel Suen

UP LATE

Continued from pg 25

selection of breakfast sandwiches, one taco and a few donuts that are ordered via a QR code on the side of the white cinderblock building or in advance through the restaurant’s website. This makes for an efficient way of doing business, but it also leads to what’s so special about Up Late: the convivial atmosphere it creates by assembling a random group of hungry, late-night folks in various states of sobriety hanging out, chatting each other up and giving life to an otherwise dark corner of the city.

Of course, Up Late would not work without good food, and to that end, the restaurant is a success. Wright may be offering easy, straightforward sandwiches, but he puts care into them and nails the small details to make them memorable. An egg sandwich might seem simple on its face — griddled sourdough, a fried egg, American cheese — but it’s flawlessly toasted to a yellow-gold hue and has a satisfying, subtle crunch that yields to soft butteriness (you’ll find this joy in the simple grilled cheese, too). What makes the sandwich utterly wonderful, however, is the combination of housemade blackberry jelly and habanero aioli that marry to form a complex, sweet-spicy concoction that is liberally applied so that it seeps out when you take a bite. Wright credits Bockman with the pairing, admitting he always thought it was weird when his boss would put hot sauce and jelly on his egg sandwiches. Once he tried it, and then perfected a homemade version of each for Up Late, he was convinced. It’s difficult not to be. The egg sandwich serves as the base for two other offerings.

Diners can order a bacon version, which infuses the already complex combination of flavors with gentle smoke. It’s delicious, but the way to go is with sausage. Wright makes his own pork patties, so you get the delightfully rustic texture that can only be achieved with a housemade product. His seasoning blend is perfect, evoking the nostalgia of the quintessential Jimmy Dean breakfast patty, but amping it up with even more sage and significant spice so it gives you a subtle, earthy heat. That he puts this level of care into a late-night walk-up counter is all you need to know to understand what’s special about this place.

Wright’s final savory offering is a carne asada taco, which features marinated hunks of juicy, char-kissed steak accented with

cilantro, lime and white onion. On its own, it’s a satisfying street taco, but it becomes a thing of absolute beauty when gilded with the accompanying side of refreshing, cilantro-forward green salsa. The stunning interplay of warm grilled meat and cool verdant sauce will wake up even the most bleary-eyed of late-night diners.

Because of its affiliation with World’s Fair — and, by extension, Strange Donuts — Up Late offers a small selection of doughnuts and either chocolate or plain milk to wash them down. On the night of my visit, Wright was serving a delightfully rich chocolate cake doughnut covered in silken chocolate icing, an outstanding simple glazed one, and a gooey butter cake version that was surprisingly balanced thanks to its lemon-kissed

glaze. In a decidedly Canadian fashion, you’re invited to wash them down with a beer, in this case, a refreshing lager brewed only for Up Late by Four Hands.

Sipping on that delicious beer while noshing on a taco and chatting up fellow merrymakers on the lit-up parking lot of one of the city’s most iconic buildings in the middle of the night, you understand that Up Late hasn’t simply brought good late-night food to St. Louis. It has breathed much needed life into the city at night. That’s more impressive than even the most delicious of sausage and egg sandwiches.

Up Late offers a selection of sandwiches, tacos and donuts. | MABEL SUEN

Gooey butter cake, chocolate and glazed donuts are available at Up Late. | MABEL SUEN

The concept is open until the wee hours. | MABEL SUEN

Every Thursday in MAY 6–8pm • Forest Park • Museum’s North Lawn mohistory.org/twilight-thursdays

SHORT ORDERS

“Free the Sun” Fruited Berliner Weisse

Third Wheel Brewing (4008 I-70 North Outer Road, St Peters; thirdwheelbrewing.com)

ABV: 4.9 percent

This seasonal is something I look forward to every summer. It’s a sour loaded with orange sweetness on the nose and first taste that yields to vanilla to balance the tart on the finish. But the key is the perfect infusion of lactose to thicken the sip and create a creamsicle experience that’ll take you back to the Junes and Julys of your childhood.

“Citropolis” American IPA Modern Brewery (5200 Oakland Avenue, modernbrewery.com)

ABV: 6.8 percent

Thirst Trap

Five new St. Louis beers to drink all summer long

Written by TONY REHAGEN

Itravel a lot for my work. Whether the assignment is beer-related or not, no matter what city or town I’m visiting, I’m always looking for a local brew. If I’m in a hotel and pull up Google, my phone barely lets me type the letter “b” before auto-filling “brewery near me.” In just the last six months, I’ve sipped local beers from Chicago to Morgantown, North Carolina, to Indianapolis to Las Vegas to Des Moines, Iowa, to Brooklyn, New York. I was in Nashville, Tennessee, last week when the national Craft Brewers Conference & BrewExpo brought craft brews from all over the world to Music City.

I say all this not to brag (but seriously, you should see my Untappd, a veritable trove of exotic thirst traps) but rather to say that I’ve gotten snapshots of dozens of city beer scenes — and in my humble opinion, St. Louis’ can hang with almost anywhere. You might think upon returning from these farflung beer safaris that I’d fall back

on a familiar local favorite or be tired of the stuff altogether, but the area’s brewers, through their skill and imagination, are always creating new must-try brews. I’m a beer tourist in my own town.

So as you go on your summer vacation(s), be sure to check out the native taprooms and beer bars, order some flights to sample the local flavors and sneak a few cans or bombers home in the family SUV or your checked bag. But when you can’t get away, remember that a five-star beer staycation is always an easy Uber ride away. Here are five new (or new to you) local beers that are more than worth the short trip.

“Balkan Lager”

Urban Chestnut Brewing Company (multiple locations, including 4465 Manchester Avenue, urbanchestnut.com)

ABV: 4.8 percent

Summer is the natural time for a light, crisp and refreshing lager — but that doesn’t mean you have to settle for the same old lawnmow-

er beers. Craft brewers are doing amazing things with the triedand-true style, and St. Louis’s own lager expert, Urban Chestnut, has collaborated with the Webster Grove restaurant Balkan Treat Box to create this clean, slightly bready Helles beauty made with Hersbrucker hops, which add a bright, citrusy aroma.

“Gretel” Munich Dunkel

Shared Brewing (2657 Lyle Avenue, Maplewood; sharedbrewing. com)

ABV: 5.3 percent

Dunkels are darker lagers, typically drank in the fall. But you don’t have to wait to get your Oktoberfest on. Shared, a collective owned by employees of Side Project Brewing, has created this amber pour that packs just enough malty, caramelly sweetness into this surprisingly easy drinker. It slakes your thirst without weighing you down on a warm summer afternoon. All the same, I’d leave the sweaty lederhosen in the closet until September.

OK, this is neither a new beer nor a summer seasonal release. But those are actually the reasons I want to celebrate it here — it’s always there, it’s always great. And my beer-drinking buddies and I feel like not enough people acknowledge that. Citropolis is a classic Citra-hopped (duh) American IPA that is equal parts fruity and bitter, while also being smooth. At a light-bodied 6.8 percent, it’s right in that sweet spot between a session and a sipper, something you can enjoy, on tap or out of the can, all over town this summer — and beyond.

“Jane Says” Barrel-Aged Imperial Stout

Perennial Artisan Ales (8125 Michigan Avenue, perennialbeer. com)

ABV: 13.4 percent

There’s no such thing as “stout season.” Does one’s palate generally wait until colder months to turn to a warmer, more decadent beer? Perhaps. Do you want to lug a bomber of thick and super boozy ale on the golf course or float trip? Probably not. But there is always a place for a good dessert stout — and there’s almost always a good barrel-aged stout or barleywine at Perennial. The latest from the purveyors of the world-coveted BA Abraxas is this double pastry stout loaded with sweet chocolate and vanilla bean and earthy almond, thickened with lactose, and aged in Old Fitzgerald barrels for a sophisticated sipper to enjoy after dinner on the front porch. n

Urban Chestnut’s Balkan Lager is light, crisp and refreshing. | TONY REHAGEN

Find out which beer should be your official refreshing drink of the summer. | TONY REHAGEN

One-Sided Beef

STL’s Lion’s Choice is desperate to start beefing with Arby’s

Written by JESSICA ROGEN

Early this month, Governor Mike Parson got on the “May is beef month” bandwagon, holding an actual event and putting out a press release announcing that Missouri, like the rest of the U.S., cares a whole lot about helping local farmers make ends meat.

While we reluctantly got to say well done to our Republican governor, we’re a little surprised to see beloved St. Louis roast beef chain Lion’s Choice jumping in on the action with a Twitter campaign aimed at stirring up some trouble with Arby’s. Lion’s Choice announced its intentions on May 2 with a Tweet: “It’s #NationalBeefMonth and we’ll be beefing with @Arby’s all month long. Join

The Stuff of Dreams

Barbecue and Mexican restaurants GastroPit and El Milagro Azteca find a home next to each other on the Hill

Written by JESSICA ROGEN

Few things in the culinary world are more American than barbecue or more beloved than Mexican food. St. Louis restaurateur Joe Smugala, the owner of Carnivore and PitStop, is set to have one of the most long-awaited combo stops for St. Louisans to indulge in both as he debuts

us for the best roasts of the year.”

The tweet got 737 views, three retweets, eight likes and two comments, one of which, from @ pmazzer13, captures the general mood of the internet. “Does r b know that?” they write.

Arby’s, which has the slogan “We Have the Meats” not “We Have the Beefs,” has not responded.

Since then, Lion’s Choice has put out four tweets trying to raise the beef (including one that’s just a retweet of an old Saturday Night Live skit), but all the Missouri grass and homegrown corn in the state can’t fatten up this steer. The most successful of the

efforts is a tweet of some Arby’s badly photoshopped into a Star Wars scene, which garnered 40 likes and more than 4,000 views. Parson’s announcement got more than 6,000 views and 61 likes, and he posted a blurry photo with some volunteers.

Look, Lion’s Choice, we love you at the RFT. You’re great. But for a company with the slogan “Served with pride since 1967,” this isn’t a good look. We get you’re just trying to channel some Steak-umms Twitter vibes, but your food is better than this. You’re better than this.

Time to send this overdone scheme back to the kitchen. n

[FOOD NEWS]

Finally!

St. Louis County Greek Festival will return after a three-year hiatus

Written by JESSICA ROGEN

two new concepts, J. Smugs GastroPit (relocated) and El Milagro Azteca, in a renovated space at 4940-48 Southwest Avenue.

Led by Chef Carlos Hernandez, GastroPit offers barbecue classics and some dishes with innovative twists such as a crispy rolls, similar to spring rolls, stuffed with smoked meats; a Hill Smoked Salami sandwich (hot salami and Provel in a baguette); and a smoked mushroom bowl. Notable is an interesting array of sauces, which includes a Dr. Pepper and jalapeño Carolina.

Hernandez is also heading up El Milagro Azteca, set to open any day now. The restaurant takes inspiration from Baja to Michoacan, aiming for a mix of traditional and modern fare, and it promises top-notch Mexican cuisine and libations. In addition to the renovated interior, the restaurant also boasts a patio with a wood-burning fireplace. For details on hours and menu, keep an eye on elmilagroazteca.com. n

The pandemic took a lot of things, big and small, away from us. They’ve been trickling back as the case count has gone down and people feel more comfortable gathering together. But despite everything we’ve gained over the last 12 months, something has been missing in the St. Louis region, and it tasted of baklava, souvlaki and ouzo. Yes, that’s correct: The St. Louis County Greek Festival has been sadly absent from our lives — and our stomachs.

But no longer! On Memorial Day weekend (that’s May 26 through 29), the Greek fest returns to Assumption Greek Orthodox Church (1755 Des Peres Road, Town and Country; 314-966-2255). Anyone who attends will get to experience the Greek cuisine, live music, folk dancing, church tours and vendor market that has typified the popular celebration.

This year, there will also be a 5K/10K walk/run on May 27 that will benefit FOCUS Gateway City, which provides food and clothing to those in need. Those interested can register at readysetgivestl.org.

The festivities run from 11 a.m. to 9 p.m. on Friday, Saturday and Sunday and from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. on Monday. Admission is free but food is not. More details at stlgreekfest.com. n

El Milagro Azteca’s food takes inspiration from across Mexico. | COURTESY PHOTO

Lion’s Choice is too delicious for lame social media campaigns. | COURTESY PHOTO The Greek Festival is set to deliver some delicious fare. | COURTESY PHOTO

ST. LOUIS STANDARDS

The Prime Stuff

Roberto’s has been a beloved south county institution for a more than three decades

Written by CHERYL BAEHR

Roberto’s Trattoria

145 Concord Plaza, Sappington; 314-842-9998

Established 1990

Roberto Zanti might never have gone into the restaurant business were it not for an act of teenage rebellion — and the unintended consequences of his father’s punishment.

“When I was 14 years old, I skipped school, and my father found out,” Zanti recalls. “He grabbed me by my ear, took me to a restaurant and said, ‘Here. If

you don’t want to go to school, you can wash dishes.’ And you know what? I loved it. I was the richest kid on the block.”

The passion that experience ignited in Zanti all those years ago has been the backbone of Roberto’s Trattoria, the beloved south county institution that has been the area’s go-to for upscale Italian cuisine since 1990. Founded as a way to bring to St. Louis the traditional dishes Zanti experienced growing up in the fishing town of Taranto on Italy’s far southeastern coast, Roberto’s has endeared itself to diners over the years thanks to its high-quality, traditional cuisine, as well as Zanti’s penchant for making his guests feel like dear friends.

For Zanti, those two things — excellent food and warm hospitality — are what define Italian cuisine. That’s why he was so surprised the first time he came to the United States and found that the former was lacking. A member of Italy’s Merchant Marine, Zanti vividly recalls docking in Boston and being so excited when he saw a restaurant emblazoned

with an Italian flag and a sign that read “Ristorante Italiano.” Excited for a taste of his homeland, Zanti was dismayed when he went inside and saw that there was nothing Italian about the place — at least, it didn’t have the sort of Italian food he was used to eating. He and his friends left and went to another place with an Italian flag as well as a photo of Italy’s national soccer team on its building. Convinced it would be a better experience, Zanti was positively crestfallen when he looked at the offerings.

“It was a disaster,” Zanti says. “That’s when I thought that if I came here and just made a little plate of spaghetti I could do good.”

Not long after those experiences in Boston, Zanti came to St. Louis to visit with his brother. Here, he met his now ex-wife and moved with her back to Italy but found himself again in St. Louis a few years later so she could be closer to her family. Not long after, he began working at his brother’s restaurant, eventually unexpectedly finding himself as

its owner. With the reins in his hands, he transitioned the eatery’s cafeteria-style format into the bastion of traditional Italian cuisine he’d dreamed of opening ever since that visit to Boston. He was confident in his food and was sure the dining public would turn out in droves. It would prove to be much slower going.

“We had a really rough start,” Zanti says. “I went through a lot of pain because the American palate was not quite like where I am from. Also, I knew nobody here. I wasn’t born here. I didn’t go to high school here. I suffered a little bit because of that.”

Zanti kept his head down and continued to offer food he believed in. After 11 years in its original location near Gravois and McKenzie, he moved the restaurant to south county’s Concord Plaza and ran it there until he lost the restaurant in a divorce. Unwilling to give up — and with the support of his loyal customers — Zanti resurrected the concept as Roberto’s in 2003, moved the business back to Concord Plaza in 2006, and has been steadily win-

The Roberto’s crew has made its name by delivering superb hospitality. | BRADEN MCMAKIN

ning the hearts of his guests ever since.

“We don’t cut corners,” Zanti says. “What we use is all prime stuff, and you can really tell the difference in taste on everything. I think we attract people that think more like me; I don’t mind paying a dollar more as long as it’s good, but what gets me mad is when you go somewhere and it’s not good. I am not happy, and I won’t go back.”

However, it’s not just quality ingredients that make Roberto’s such a special place. Zanti is wellknown for his warm hospitality, which he describes as the insistence on treating his customers as friends. It’s what has kept his regulars coming back for generations, including Matt and Jamie Hines, who purchased Roberto’s

from Zanti in January.

“My wife and I have been having date nights here for almost 10 years,” Matt Hines says. “I have been coming here for over 20 years and have known Roberto for almost that entire time because he works the floor and is very good at what he does. It’s one of the only places I’ve ever walked into where I’ve felt like my dollar is important. Everybody who walks through the door feels appreciated, and the servers and ownership go out of their way to make sure you feel that way. That’s what has always meant the most to me, especially when you are spending this kind of money on a meal. It always felt like a different touch than I could get at 90 percent of the other places in town.”

For Hines, the chance for him

and Jamie to carry on Zanti’s legacy has been a longtime dream — and something they have been discussing for several years. When Zanti finally decided he was ready to get out of the day-today operations of the restaurant last year, he knew he could trust the Hineses to be good stewards of what he had created. Now that it’s in their hands, he and the entire Roberto’s team have been thrilled with the smooth transition.

“I trusted Matt,” Zanti says. “I’ve known him for a long time, and I trust him in a way I wouldn’t trust anybody else. That restaurant is my baby. I love Matt like he is my own kid, and he has been doing an excellent job.”

The Hineses feel humbled that they have been able to take over such a storied space and are committed to doing things exactly as Zanti has done them all these years. Much of this commitment stems from their own love for the place; as Hines sees it, Roberto’s offers some of the best food he’s ever eaten. More importantly, though, he believes there is nowhere that is more committed to genuine hospitality and making its guests feel like they’re at home. That welcoming approach is why generations of diners fill its dining room every night, some of them celebrating the most important milestones of their lives. He takes

that very seriously.

“We have 50- and 60-year anniversaries on a weekly basis, and that’s not an exaggeration,” Hines says. “We have 80th birthday parties, 90th ones too; one recently was 101.”

Zanti echoes this sentiment.

“One lady had her college graduation, her graduation from law school, her 30th and 40th birthdays,” Zanti says. “I can name people who had their rehearsal dinner here and then every year after that they have their anniversary and want their special table where they sat 20 years ago. It’s wonderful.”

These are the reasons Hines and his wife plan on keeping everything exactly the same as when Zanti owned the place — something that will be easy to do considering that Zanti remains a presence in the restaurant. He continues to work the floor, give his thoughts on specials and hold court over the room he spent over three decades building — and Hines wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Jaime and I are very humbled to be able to have this opportunity,” Hines says. “It’s actually quite an honor because it’s hard to find something like this. It has a neat atmosphere, wonderful clientele and employees, and great food. Let’s put it this way: I smile every day I walk into work.”

ICONIC PEOPLE, PLACES & DISHES THAT ANCHOR STL’S FOOD SCENE

The Ahi tuna appetizer at Roberto’s. | COURTESY PHOTO

The egg raviolo appetizer at Roberto’s. | COURTESY PHOTO

Matt and Jamie Hines purchased Roberto’s from Roberto Zanti (center). | BRADEN MCMAKIN

An Edible Fit For Any Chocolate

Snob

Honeybee’s Peanut + Pretzel Chocolate Bar will also get you just the right amount of high

Written by D.D. DANKMAS

One issue with edibles — other than forgetting you took one before it even kicks in — is that they’re often in the form of a bingeable treat. Nobody ever eats just one gummy bear or half a cake pop. Yet that’s the level of restraint sometimes needed to make sure you don’t get so high you call the emergency department.

Most edibles are in food form (though there are some pills), and most are a type of candy. In the candy world, there are basically two options, chocolate and chewy fruity. As a youngster, I was always firmly in team chewy fruity (Mike & Ike, Starburst, Skittles, Haribo). I’d occasionally foray into chocolate for those vaguely shaped pumpkins or Christmas trees Reese’s put out every holiday.

This changed after I spent time overseas in a chocolate producing region of the world (Switzerland). I became a chocolate snob — one of those insufferable people who complains about American chocolate and only eats Lindt and the high-end stuff. (While also eating Red Dye No. 2 and Yellow Dye No. 7 in my chewy fruity candy, which I did not abandon.)

The upshot is, I have a positive but restrained relationship with chocolate. I have a very bingeable relationship with chewy fruity stuff. So the idea of getting a THCinfused Honeybee’s chocolate bar appealed to me on several levels.

First, I figured I wouldn’t overindulge and see God like I did once with Camino edibles, which are so tasty I ate five in one sitting. And the chocolatiers making the treat are from Bissinger’s, so I could assuage my chocolate snobbery.

I bought the Honeybee’s Peanut + Pretzel chocolate bar at Swade Dispensary for $34. The bar contained 100 milligrams of THC and was marked off into 10-milligram squares and 5-milligram triangles that were easy to break and dose. In addition to offering other flavors, Honeybee’s also offers bars that are infused with 300 milligrams of THC (including one in this flavor) that are a bit more expensive. I am a low and slow kind of person though, so I stuck with the 100-milligram bar.

When I got home, I popped a triangle in my mouth and let it melt over my tongue. It tasted a bit weedy and chocolaty. I got perhaps a single note of pretzel and peanut. That particular triangle didn’t have any crunch.

It went kind of fast, and I was eyeballing the bar for a few minutes before I decided to eat another (and final) piece. This time, the crunch from the pretzel was there, complimenting the soft

milk chocolate with a hint of cannabis. Yeah, that was some good chocolate. My snobbishness thus appeased, I waited for the effects to kick in. When my own random thoughts started making me crack

up, I remembered I had taken an edible about an hour ago and relaxed into a mild high. I watched some TV and then passed out and got a good night’s sleep.

I tried the edible again with just a 5-milligram dose and found that I woke up in the middle of the night. Overall, its best and highest use wasn’t as a sleep aid. (Which, real talk, is what I tend to use all my edibles for, despite any budtender’s advisement.)

Instead, the best way to use this is when you’re going to hang out in a park with friends for the afternoon and you want to relax on a blanket in the sun. Another good time was had when I stretched out in front of the TV with a guy friend watching Seinfeld on Netflix.

The only issue you might have is with restraint. Even this chocolate snob would sneak in a third piece from time to time. And when I shared it with friends, no one stopped at just one 5-milligram triangle.

But even if you aren’t the best with restraint, the high from Honeybee’s Peanut + Pretzel chocolate bar is mild enough you can get away with an extra piece, just this once. n

Chocolatiers from Bissinger’s now make infused treats for Honeybee. | COURTESY HONEYBEE

When my own random thoughts started making me crack up, I remembered I had taken an edible about an hour ago and relaxed into a mild high. I watched some TV and then passed out and got a good night’s sleep.

The Landscape of Dance

St. Louis’ Leverage celebrates 10 years of adventurous dance this season

Written by JESSICA ROGEN

Audience building is the perpetual quest of all arts organizations, regardless of medium. How can we get people who don’t think they like dance, visual art, classical music in our doors?

In 2013, Diana Barrios, director of what was then aTrek Dance Collective, had a novel idea: “If you can’t get the audience to come to us, to come into the theater, then maybe we just need to put ourselves where they are,” Barrios recalls thinking.

She and the company did that with Seen UnSeen, a dance they staged in the giant windows of the Kranzberg building in Grand Center that same year. Random passersby would stop and stare, excited to see dance there.

“It was a really, really just amazing, amazing experience,” Barrios says. “There was a stoplight there, and so people would pull their cars up, and they would stop, and then they would lean over, and they would watch. And then the light would turn green, and people would start honking because three cars back they didn’t know what was going on.”

The performance turned out to be something of a revelation for Barrios and a point of transition for aTrek, which reinvented its vision and aesthetic focus, even renaming itself the Leverage Dance Theater. The name refers to the company’s partner-based dance choreography, which requires leverage and physics.

This year marks a decade since that reinvention, and Barrios and

CULTURE 35

the company are ready to celebrate. They opened their 10th anniversary season last week with a performance titled River of Time, which reflected on the company’s last 10 years.

“We have brought back different choreographers and artists [who] have worked with us in the past,” says Keli Hermes, assistant director of Leverage Dance Theater, explaining that a past assistant director now living in Salt Lake City created a piece and local artists have also contributed to the choreography of other pieces. “It was a little bit of ‘bring back your old friend’ type feeling and reflecting on how they have changed in 10 years as artists and people.”

Normally, Leverage puts on two big shows a year, but for the anniversary, it is doing an extra performance in the fall, date forthcoming.

The May show is specifically for the anniversary, as is the fall show, which uses material from past Leverage shows in a “really weird and crazy, maniac fun way,” Hermes says.

“We’re going to try to make it just really chaotic and delightful,” she says, adding that there is also an annual Halloween show, which changes yearly and makes its home in different spaces.

The company also typically does a few small shows with Intersect Arts Center and a few community performances each year. A common thread among the performances is taking the work into unconventional spaces.

“[If] you’re coming to our performance, you better be up for an adventure,” Barrios says with a laugh. “Some are more adventurous than others, and we definitely tell audiences what level of adven-

ture they’re getting themselves involved in. But yeah, it’s interactive. It’s immersive.”

Leverage has seven company dancers (plus those that participate in specific performances), and everyone is part time. Hermes says that everyone is required to come in to rehearse two days a week. But most are extremely motivated.

“They want to dance,” she says. “They want to be there.”

As do Barrios and Hermes, who say Leverage is fulfilling and fun to be part of. Both note that the 10-year mark has been a good moment for reflection on where Leverage is now and where they want it to be in the future.

One thing they are thinking about is the landscape of dance. A decade ago, there were not many people out there doing the style of dance they were offering. But since then, Leverage has trained dancers who have gone on to perform in cities across the U.S.

“I see the impact,” Barrios says. “And it’s really cool to see that, to pause and take stock.”

Barrios and Hermes are still working on what comes next, but Barrios notes that accessibility, site-specific dances and a youth company are all part of the plan.

“It’s an exciting time to be an artist here,” Barrios says. “It’s a much more exciting time to be working in the arts.” n

For details about forthcoming shows, keep your eye on leveragedancetheater.squarespace.com.

Leverage is known for bringing dancers into unconventional spaces. | COURTESY PHOTO

Leverage typically puts on two larger shows a season. | COURTESY PHOTO

MUSIC

Tunesmithing

St. Louis musician Kip Loui plans on singing and songwriting forever

Written by STEVE LEFTRIDGE

Ithink it might be the best song

I ever wrote,” Kip Loui tells me. That’s quite a claim from a songwriting lifer who will turn 60 this year and has been copiously tunesmithing since high school.

He’s speaking about “Cold Out There,” the title track from his new album, which he considers his first-ever honest-to-goodness solo record. Cold Out There has been a long time coming from a guy who has been bedrock-deep in the St. Louis music scene for decades, with all the classic local bonafides — Vintage Vinyl clerk, KDHX host, Uncle Tupelo associate, Twangfest co-founder and leader of a half-dozen great St. Louis bands.

The new album’s liner notes are a who’s who of St. Louis countryrock — Brian Henneman, Eric Ambel, John Horton, Mark Ortmann, David Torretta, Kevin Buckley, Mark Spencer, Jesse Irwin, Brad Sarno and others — and the album is filled with the kind of sturdy, amiable country-rock tunes that Loui has long been known for.

This time out, though, Loui ended up experimenting with a new songwriting approach: writing from the first-person perspective of fictional characters.

“I like the idea of exploring songs through the eyes of different characters like a novelist does,” Loui says. “It allows me to express certain thoughts and ideas that aren’t necessarily mine.”

Those characters in Cold Out There include a widower, a young child, a lonely school teacher, an elderly crystal salesman, an alcoholic writer, a brothel owner and more. Loui says all of them have helped him find a new groove in storytelling. “If I’m just writing from my perspective, that is so lim-

iting,” he says. “I can imagine myself in different time periods and in the shoes of different characters, and as long as I do so thoughtfully and hopefully intelligently and with sensitivity, I think that’s a completely valid artistic choice.”

The songs all take inspiration from disparate sources. Take the lead track, “ADHD,” a slinky rocker inspired by Loui’s day job as a special education teacher. “I Don’t Drink It For the Taste,” with nifty guitar work from Henneman, was sparked by Nic Cage’s character from Leaving Las Vegas. “Doug-

las County,” featuring Buckley’s drowsy fiddle lines, is based on a roadside peddler Loui encountered selling rocks and minerals in the Ozarks.

“I watched him interact with customers, explaining these crystals to kids,” he says. “He seemed lonely to me. I made up the rest.”

The aforementioned “Cold Out There” is inspired by Suzy’s, a brothel that plays a minor part in Steinbeck’s Of Mice and Men. Loui describes the song as “a conversation that Suzy is having with one of the ranch hands. She’s selling

the idea of family and community, but it’s really all just transactional.” Despite the song’s gentlesounding refrain, he insists that it’s a brutal song.

“I’m really hoping Bonnie Raitt covers it,” he says, and indeed, it’s easy to hear a singer like Raitt inhabiting the song.

As much imagination as Loui used to create these character sketches, he’s also in each song somewhere. “I try to take the personal and make it universal,” he says. Take the album’s closing song, “More,” which is “probably

Kip Loui uses the first person in his new album Cold Out There. | COURTESY PHOTO

me having a dark night of the soul moment.” And “Only Child” is told through the eyes of Loui’s young son, Max, whom Loui and his wife, J.J., a musician who sings harmonies on the album, are raising in Crestwood.

Loui is far from an only child. He’s the youngest of six, raised in Webster Groves by his mother, Shirley, a Washington University composition professor, and his father, Wayne, an award-winning theater director and Saint Louis University professor. Both died two years ago from COVID-19 within 10 days after an outbreak in their retirement home. “They were beautiful people,” Loui says. “Just lovely, wonderful people.”

Such a statement is typical of Loui, who at 59 still has a youthful, flop-haired Muppet quality. “I was obscenely good-natured,” Loui says. “I had no interest in drugs or alcohol.” What did interest him was his older siblings’ record collections and the cheap acoustic guitars laying around the house.

By 17, he had fallen hard for the Beatles and started experimenting with writing his own songs. “I spent most of the ’80s desperately wishing it was the ’60s,” he says. “I really wanted to go back in time and live as a mod.”

His twenties were spent playing in coffee shops, earning a degree in communications from Saint Louis University and working in record stores — Streetside Records, Vintage Vinyl and Euclid Records. “I would judge everyone’s souls by what kind of music they liked,” he says, joking about the music-snob stereotype of record-store clerks.

By then accumulating a pile of original songs, Loui formed his first band, the Heebee Jeebies, a punky power-pop outfit that became a mainstay on the late-’80s circuit, playing the old Cicero’s basement bar, Off Broadway and the Hi-Pointe.

Around this time, Loui developed an interest in country music, a genre that he is now probably best known for. “The irony and hilarious part of all of this was that I hated country music growing up,” Loui says. “I had city-people prejudice against it. I thought it was just for uneducated bumpkins.” He changed his mind after listening to Gram Parsons and the Flying Burrito Brothers.

One day in the record store, he threw on a Hank Williams record. “That was an epiphany,” he says. “The imagery and the songwriting and the simplicity and the archetypal-ness of it — it hit me to the core. That was the day I got over my apprehension of country music and started immersing myself in Ray Price, Buck Owens, Merle Haggard, George Jones …”

Loui started hanging out with a couple of rock-band kids from Belleville named Jeff Tweedy and Jay Farrar, attending their gigs, showing up at rehearsals and sharing mixtapes. “Everybody knew Uncle Tupelo were going to go far,” Loui says. “I would loan Jay my guitar a lot because it had a pickup in it. I would mail out demos on their behalf trying to get them a record deal.” Loui’s name would later show up in the liner notes for the reissue of Uncle Tupelo’s No Depression album as an early manager of the band.

That put Loui at the tip of the spear of the ’90s alt-country movement. He hosted The Back Country on KDHX, curated and produced a St. Louis roots-rock tribute to Chuck Berry, co-founded Twangfest and served as president of the nonprofit that ran the festival for 10 years.

But he never stopped writing and singing his own songs, playing in country-rock band Belle Starr and the Rockhouse Ramblers, a classic-country cover band that ended up recording two original albums.

“At the end of the day, that’s primarily what I am,” Loui says. “I’m a songwriter who sings a little bit and strums an acoustic guitar.”

Loui returned to a more rocking sound in the ’00s with the Transmitters, releasing two more albums, and he and Henneman formed Diesel Island, a traditional countrycover collective that is now coming up on 20 years together.

Over the last few years, while settling into the family life, Loui has released songs recorded with his wife J.J. on The Hill Recordings (2016) and Show Me State (2020), and today he remains as committed as ever to his craft and in his belief in his songs.

When asked how long he plans to keep writing songs, he answers quickly.

“Forever,” he says. “It’s what I do.”

All Together Now

Black Tulip Chorale celebrates its fifth anniversary as a mixed-voice chorus for singers of all orientations and genders

of all orientations and gender expressions. In the music world, Stumpf explains, sopranos and altos are typically women, and tenors and basses are men.

“We take that paradigm and throw it right out the window,” Stumpf says.

Black Tulip places singers in sections where the color of their voice sits the best.

by MONICA OBRADOVIC

Written

Five years ago, Robert Stumpf noticed something missing in St. Louis.

St. Louis had the Gateway Men’s Chorus, the St. Louis Women’s Chorale and CHARIS for women and nonbinary people. But there was no all-encompassing, gender-inclusive environment for LGBTQ+ singers to come together. So he made one of his own.

In 2018, Black Tulip Chorale became St. Louis’ first LGBTQ+ mixed-voice chorus for singers

Now, after five years of paving the wave for inclusivity, Black Tulip will celebrate its fifth anniversary on Sunday, May 21, with “Shining Through,” a concert at First Presbyterian Church of Kirkwood (100 East Adams Avenue, Kirkwood; 314-965-0326)

But the concert will focus on more anniversaries than just Black Tulip’s.

“Since this is our fifth anniversary concert, we decided we wanted to use it to take the concept of anniversaries even further,” Stumpf says.

The chorale will recognize several moments in LGBTQ+ history, with music ranging from art song and oratorio to pop and musical theater. Each selection will commemorate a landmark moment in LGBTQ+ history — and they’re not all happy ones.

Black Tulip will recognize the 50th anniversary of the founding of Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays, or PFLAG, as well as Harvey Milk’s legacy. Milk became one of the first openly gay elected officials in the United States before he was assassinated 45 years ago in San Francisco. Black Tulip will sing the same piece the San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus sang on the steps of City Hall after Milk’s assassination.

The chorale will also reflect on the killing of Matthew Shepard, a gay University of Wyoming student who was beaten and left to die in 1998. The first law enforcement officer on the scene of Shepard’s death reportedly saw a doe sitting near Shepard. Black Tulip will sing “Deer Song” from a later work called Considering Matthew Shepard.

Five years ago, Black Tulip started with 26 singers. It’s now up to 46, with young and old members ranging in different levels of experience. There’s a retired journalist on board, a professor of pediatrics, a doctoral student studying mathematics and more.

“I think there’s a growing need to have more inclusive spaces that

also give a chance for larger representation,” Stumpf says. “That’s one of the things we’re shooting for at least.”

Black Tulip’s name comes from the 1850 novel The Black Tulip by Alexandre Dumas. At its core, the book tells the story of a character who surmounted a great deal of injustice with the support and trust of others. Black Tulip Chorale strives to create a community in a similar light — to help members find justice in spite of adversity.

“The book landed in my hands probably during one of the darkest, loneliest periods of my life,” Stumpf says. “It stuck with me ever since. And when this came around, [the name] just made complete sense.”

Black Tulip’s “Shining Through” concert will feature the world premiere of a commission from Kansas City composer Ryan Main (“Better Be a Seed”) and will conclude with Ralph Vaughan Williams’ “Serenade to Music,” featuring text from Shakespeare’s Merchant of Venice accompanied by members of the St. Louis Civic Orchestra. n

The concert starts at 5 p.m. Sunday. Tickets cost $15 and are available on Eventbrite.

Black Tulip Chorale celebrates its fifth anniversary this year. | COURTESY BLACK TULIP CHORALE

The Garden of Good and Evil

Paul Schrader brings cinema another agonized hero in Master Gardener — and shows he’s still in command

Written by CLIFF FROEHLICH

Master Gardener

Although he’s one of the world’s most accomplished filmmakers, with a remarkably deep and surprisingly diverse body of work stretching back 50 years, Paul Schrader has seldom received the adulation lavished on such contemporaries (and past collaborators) as Martin Scorsese, Steven Spielberg or even the more critically divisive Brian De Palma. Certainly, he’s respected — especially for his screenwriting on such now-canonical films as Scorsese’s Taxi Driver and Raging Bull — but Schrader never quite managed a major commercial breakthrough, with American Gigolo (1980) the long-ago exception, and for most of the past two decades, he’s struggled mightily to find viewers, toiling on an uneven mix of under-seen work-for-hire films and more personal projects that were either mishandled by distributors or mangled by producers.

Schrader’s admirably uncompromising artistic vision no doubt accounts for much of his difficulty winning a mass audience. Although occasionally enlivened by an ironic black humor, his works feature a self-conscious seriousness and a grim, relentlessly bleak worldview. As I wrote nearly 30 years ago about Witch Hunt — one of his undeniable misfires — “even when working within

popular genres, Schrader brings an art-house sensibility to bear and always remains at a critical remove. Chilly and abstract, his movies — especially those he both writes and directs — are weirdly calm intellectual meditations on agitated emotional states: Schrader wants to cut loose — he’s drawn to violence, fascinated by dark forces and underground men — but he’s too smart, too cautious, too restrained to forfeit control.”

That description of Schrader’s films remains entirely accurate today, and his new film Master Gardener features another of his exquisitely agonized heroes. Like Taxi Driver’s Travis Bickle — and the thematic variations found in American Gigolo, Light Sleeper, First Reformed and Card Counter — Narvel Roth (Joel Edgerton) qualifies as one of “God’s lonely men,” largely isolated from “normal” society and desperately questing after purpose and redemption.

The chief horticulturist at Gracewood Gardens, a sprawling estate presided over by the imperious Norma Haverhill (a superb Sigourney Weaver), Narvel presents a placid surface — he’s unfailingly calm, measured, precise — but he’s roiling underneath. A former enforcer for a cadre of neo-Nazis — his torso still bristling with tattoos of swastikas and white-power sigils — Narvel turned state’s evidence and found refuge at Gracewood as part of the federal Witness Protection Program. The careful order of the garden he now tends contrasts starkly with the chaos of his previous life, which is purposely communicated with telegraphic

brevity: memories that erupt in periodic flashes that never fully illuminate Narvel’s backstory. Despite voice-overs that share excerpts from his journal — a device nicked from French filmmaker Robert Bresson’s Diary of a Country Priest but now Schrader’s unmistakable signature — Narvel keeps his true feelings hidden, and we’re never quite confident that he’s expunged his racism. Given the film’s southern setting, William Faulkner’s famed quote seems particularly apt: “The past is never dead. It’s not even past.”

Having progressed from untutored apprentice to master gardener, Narvel appears to have found a measure of contentment in his circumscribed existence, but the arrival of Maya (Quintessa Swindell), Mrs. Haverhill’s greatniece, upsets the delicate balance at Gracewood. Norma describes the biracial Maya as adrift and troubled (“lifestyle choices, I believe they call them”). Because the young woman’s mother has died — from “tit cancer,” in Norma’s oddly blunt, unsettling words — Norma has decided to offer some impersonal noblesse oblige: She will pay Maya minimum wage while Narvel shepherds the wayward lamb by teaching her the gardening profession.

What Norma fails to anticipate, however, is a slowly blossoming attraction between Maya and Narvel, who serves not only as his employer’s gardener but also her on-demand lover. When Narvel tenderly comforts Maya after she’s beaten by her mother’s drug-dealing boyfriend, a jealous Norma impulsively expels the odd couple from Eden.

At this point, the simmering tensions present from the film’s start rise slowly to a boil, and Master Gardener begins to deliberately echo elements of Taxi Driver: Just as Travis eventually “rescues” Iris from her pimp in an apocalyptic gun battle, Narvel seems inevitably headed to a similar conflagration as he attempts to free Maya from the depredations of the dealer R.G. (Jared Bankens). But Schrader for once opts for hope over despair, blessedly pulling back from the abyss and allowing Narvel to find redemption through mutual love rather than expiation through blood sacrifice.

Concluding an unofficial trilogy with the well-received First Reformed and Card Counter, Master Gardener on many levels seems a grand summation, a capstone to an enviable career. But the 76-year-old Schrader already has multiple scripts at the ready and firm plans to shoot an adaptation of Russell Banks’ novel Foregone with his American Gigolo star Richard Gere. Age hasn’t diminished Schrader’s skills, and there are sequences in Master Gardener that rival those in his masterpiece Mishima. In particular, I was transported by an eruption of Lynchian surreality after Narvel and Maya finally make love: Driving headlong down a darkened highway, the couple finds flowers efflorescing in absurd, delirious abundance on either side, and they lean out their windows and howl with ecstatic delight.

Master Gardener caps an exhilarating run of recent triumphs, and if Schrader wants to climb back behind the wheel for another film, I’ll happily take that ride again. n

Written and directed by Paul Schrader. Starring Joel Edgerton, Sigourney Weaver and Quintessa Swindell. Opens May 19.

Mutual attraction proves a major complication for Maya (Quintessa Swindell) and Narvel (Joel Edgerton). | © 2022 MASTER GARDENER US LLC.

PHOTO COURTESY OF MAGNOLIA PICTURES

OUT EVERY NIGHT

Each week, we bring you our picks for the best concerts of the next seven days! To submit your show for consideration, visit https://bit.ly/3bgnwXZ. All events are subject to change, especially in the age of COVID-19, so do check with the venue for the most up-to-date information before you head out for the night. Happy showgoing!

THURSDAY 18

ANDY COCO & CO.: 4:30 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

BELLE & SEBASTIAN: 8 p.m., $40. The Pageant, 6161 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

BRIAN CURRAN: 3 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

THE BUTTERY BISCUIT BAND: 9 p.m., $9. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

CAAMP: 8 p.m., $39.50-$79.50. The Factory, 17105 N Outer 40 Rd, Chesterfield, 314-423-8500.

HUMMIN’ BIRD (: w/ Petty Grievances, NoPoint, Raised By Flies 8 p.m., $10. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

IT’S TIME: w/ Natalie Grant 7 p.m., free. Faith Church - St. Louis, 13001 Gravois Road, St Louis.

PAUL BONN AND THE BLUESMEN: 7 p.m., free.

Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

SOUTHERN CULTURE ON THE SKIDS: 8 p.m., $22. Blueberry Hill - The Duck Room, 6504 Delmar Blvd., University City, 314-727-4444.

TRACER: w/ Ptah Williams, Gary Sykes, Darrell Mixon, Erika Johnson 8 p.m., $15-$20. Joe’s Cafe, 6014 Kingsbury Ave, St. Louis.

WEDNESDAY: 8 p.m., $15. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-498-6989.

FRIDAY 19

CHUCK FLOWERS: 7 p.m., $25. National Blues Museum, 615 Washington Ave., St. Louis.

DANIELLE NICOLE: 8 p.m., $18. City Winery St. Louis, 3730 Foundry Way, Suite 158, St. Louis, 314-678-5060.

DIESEL ISLAND: 7 p.m., free. Das Bevo Biergarten, 4749 Gravois Ave., St. Louis, 314-224-5521.

EDDIE GRIFFIN: 8 p.m., $39.50-$59.50. The Factory, 17105 N Outer 40 Rd, Chesterfield, 314-423-8500.

GENE JACKSON’S POWER PLAY BAND: 8 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

JAKE’S LEG: 9:30 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

JIM’S POOL ROOM & FAMILY: 9 p.m., $10-$15. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-498-6989.

KEVIN BUCKLEY: 4 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

LIFE IN VACUUM: w/ Umlouse 7:30 p.m., $13-$15. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

MISS JUBILEE: 7:30 p.m., free. The Frisco Barroom, 8110 Big Bend Blvd., Webster Groves, 314-455-1090.

POKEY LAFARGE: 8 p.m., $40-$50. The Sheldon, 3648 Washington Blvd., St. Louis, 314-533-9900.

PORKCHOP EXPRESS: 5 p.m., $10. The Attic Music Bar, 4247 South Kingshighway Blvd., 2nd Floor, St. Louis, 314-376-5313.

THE PSYCHOLOGY OF SERIAL KILLERS: 8 p.m.,

$30-$40. Delmar Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

R.J. MISCHO: w/ L.A. Jones Blues Band 7 p.m.,

$15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

RUMOURS: A FLEETWOOD MAC TRIBUTE: 8 p.m.,

$29.50. River City Casino & Hotel, 777 River City Casino Blvd., St. Louis, 314-388-7777.

Pokey LaFarge w/ Chicago Farmer

8 p.m. Friday, May 19. The Sheldon, 3648 Washington Avenue. $40 to $50. 314-533-9900.

St. Louis’ prodigal son and the youngest man to ever have originated in the 1930s, Pokey LaFarge returns to the town that started it all this week with a Friday night performance at the Sheldon. Since the day he slung his bindle over his shoulder and left the ShowMe State behind, LaFarge has called a few places home, with stints in LA, Austin, Chicago and then LA again — but there’s no place like south city. It’s reasonable to expect he’ll play a fair number of cuts from his days stomping those streets, but fans should also ex -

SHERIE WHITE: 7:30 p.m., $20. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

THE TAYLOR PARTY: TAYLOR SWIFT NIGHT: 9 p.m., $15-$30. The Pageant, 6161 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

TRACY LAWRENCE & GARY ALLAN: 6 p.m., $43$125. Chesterfield Amphitheater, 631 Veterans Place Drive, Chesterfield.

WES HOFFMAN & FRIENDS: w/ Young Animals, Inches From Glory 8 p.m., $10. The Heavy Anchor, 5226 Gravois Ave., St. Louis, 314-352-5226.

SATURDAY 20

AL HOLLIDAY & THE EAST SIDE RHYTHM BAND: 8

pect plenty of newer material as well, including songs from his latest, 2021’s In the Blossom of Their Shade . A far cry from his classic swing- and bluesinfused early work, In the Blossom of Their Shade draws more influence from mid-20th-century country, pop and R&B, with South African and Caribbean flourishes thrown in to keep things interesting. The end result is a delightfully mature and meticulous set of songs perfect for sipping on a lemonade on a hot summer afternoon — perhaps, even, a south city one.

Room, 6504 Delmar Blvd., University City, 314-727-4444.

HYPER TENSIONS: w/ the Uppers, Glass Mattress 8 p.m., $10. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

THE INTERRUPTERS: w/ Frank Turner & The Sleeping Souls 7 p.m., $40. The Pageant, 6161 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

JAMES WHALEN: 5 p.m., $10. The Attic Music Bar, 4247 South Kingshighway Blvd., 2nd Floor, St. Louis, 3143765313.

KEVIN BUCKLEY: 7:30 p.m., free. The Frisco Barroom, 8110 Big Bend Blvd., Webster Groves, 314-455-1090.

KILVEREZ: w/ Don’t Get Dead 8 p.m., $10. The Heavy Anchor, 5226 Gravois Ave., St. Louis, 314-352-5226.

LOGAN MIZE: 8 p.m., $25. The Hawthorn, 2225 Washington Avenue, St. Louis.

LUEY VELL VITO: 8 p.m., $10. Pop’s Nightclub, 401 Monsanto Ave., East St. Louis, 618-274-6720.

NANDO STL ALBUM RELEASE: 8 p.m., $29. Delmar Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

RICKIE LEE JONES: 8 p.m., $65. City Winery St. Louis, 3730 Foundry Way, Suite 158, St. Louis, 314-678-5060.

ROCKY & THE WRANGLERS: 7 p.m., free. Das Bevo Biergarten, 4749 Gravois Ave., St. Louis, 314-224-5521.

SAVANNAH RAE: 8 p.m., free. Tin Roof St. Louis, 1000 Clark Ave, St. Louis, 314-240-5400.

THOMAS RHETT: 7:30 p.m., $26.50-$106.50. Enterprise Center, 1401 Clark Ave., St. Louis, 314-241-1888.

UNCLE ALBERT: 8 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

SUNDAY 21

B3 BLUES FESTIVAL AFTERPARTY: 6 p.m., $20.

BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

THE CAROLE KING & JAMES TAYLOR STORY: 7 p.m., $18. City Winery St. Louis, 3730 Foundry Way, Suite 158, St. Louis, 314-678-5060.

CHRIS KING & THE GUTTERBALLS: w/ Bleach

Balta, Cave Radio 8 p.m., $10. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

COMMON GROUND: 4 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

ERIC LYSAGHT: 9 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

ERIK BROOKS: 8 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

THE KASIMU-TET: 7 p.m., $25. Joe’s Cafe, 6014 Kingsbury Ave, St. Louis.

THE MIGHTY PINES: 4 p.m., free. Benton Park, Arsenal St. & S. Jefferson Ave., St. Louis.

PAUL BONN AND THE BLUESMEN: 3 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

SOULARD B3 FESTIVAL: 11:30 a.m., free. Soulard Market Park, Lafayette Ave. & S. 8th St., St. Louis.

—Daniel Hill

It’s a Match: Opening the show will be Chicago Farmer, a.k.a. Cody Diekhoff, a fellow Midwesterner who has been peddling John Prine-influenced, workingclass folk for decades. His set should be a welcome one for fans of the headlining act.

p.m., $15. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-498-6989.

ALL ROOSTERED UP: noon, free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811. BLUE MOON BLUES BAND: w/ Kent Ehrhardt 3 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

CHRIS SHEPHERD BAND: 7 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

A GERMAN REQUIEM BY JOHANNES BRAHMS: 7:30

p.m., free. Salem in Ladue United Methodist Church, 1200 S. Lindbergh Blvd., Frontenac, 314-991-0546.

GRADE 2: 8 p.m., $16. Blueberry Hill - The Duck

TROPHY EYES: w/ Like Pacific, Dialogue , Uncanny Valley 7 p.m., $26-$49.50. Red Flag, 3040 Locust Street, St. Louis, 314-289-9050.

MONDAY 22

COLT BALL: 5 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811. HIPPO CAMPUS: w/ Gus Dapperton 8 p.m., $32.50-$45. The Pageant, 6161 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

KEPI GHOULIE: w/ The Kuhlies, The Jag-wires 7:30 p.m., $15. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

LET’S HAVE CHURCH: w/ Amos Isaac, These Are They 7 p.m., free. Star Bethel Full Gospel Baptist Church, 3529 N. Jefferson Avenue, St. Louis, 314-531-3554.

MONDAY NIGHT REVIEW: w/ Tim, Danny and Randy 7 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

Pokey LaFarge. | VIA THE KURKLAND AGENCY

[CRITIC’S PICK]

SOULARD BLUES BAND: 9 p.m., $8. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

WILD GEESE: 5 p.m., free. Strauss Park, Washington & N. Grand boulevards, St. Louis.

WILLIE WATSON: 8 p.m., $20. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-498-6989.

TUESDAY 23

DUHART DUO: 4 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

ETHAN JONES: 9 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

ETHAN LEINWAND: 8 p.m., free. Yaqui’s on Cherokee, 2728 Cherokee St, St. Louis, 314-400-7712.

EXPERIMENTAL OPEN MIC V: 7 p.m., free. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

KURT ELLING NIGHT 1: 7 p.m., $45. City Winery St. Louis, 3730 Foundry Way, Suite 158, St. Louis, 314-678-5060.

MATT KRIEG: 6:30 p.m., $10. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

NAKED MIKE: 7 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

WEDNESDAY 24

THE BLUE STONES: 7 p.m., $25. Delmar Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

BROTHER LEE AND THE LEATHER JACKALS: w/ Elliott Pearson and the Passing Lane, Bob Fleming and the Cambria Iron Co. 8 p.m., $12. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-498-6989.

DREW LANCE: 4:30 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

ELITA: 8 p.m., $15. Blueberry Hill - The Duck Room, 6504 Delmar Blvd., University City, 314-727-4444.

JOHN MCVEY BAND: 8 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

KURT ELLING NIGHT 2: 7 p.m., $45. City Winery St. Louis, 3730 Foundry Way, Suite 158, St. Louis, 314-678-5060.

MARGARET & FRIENDS: 3 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

STEVE EWING: 6:30 p.m., $55. Steve’s Hot Dogs, 3145 South Grand, St. Louis.

UNWED SAILOR: w/ NightSwim 8 p.m., $15. The Heavy Anchor, 5226 Gravois Ave., St. Louis, 314-352-5226.

VOODOO BOB DYLAN 82ND BIRTHDAY BASH: 9 p.m., $14. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

THIS JUST IN

ALLIGATOR WINE: Fri., May 26, 10 p.m., $11. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

ARCADIA DANCE ORCHESTRA: Thu., June 15, 7

p.m., free. Ulysses S. Grant National Historic Site, 7400 Grant Road, Concord, 314-842-3298.

THE ARCH ENSEMBLE: Sun., June 11, 4 p.m., $15. The Arch Ensemble, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

BALLYHOO!: Sun., July 16, 8 p.m., $20. Blueberry Hill - The Duck Room, 6504 Delmar Blvd., University City, 314-727-4444.

BIG BUBBLE RAVE: Sat., May 27, 9 p.m., $20. Red Flag, 3040 Locust Street, St. Louis, 314-289-9050.

BLUE MOON BLUES BAND: W/ Kent Ehrhardt, Sat., May 20, 3 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

BROTHER JEFFERSON: Sun., May 28, 3 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

BRYAN ENG TRIO: Wed., June 21, 7:30 p.m., $20. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

THE BURNEY SISTERS: W/ Devon Cahill, Sat., July 8, 7:30 p.m., $15. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

CAN YOU FEEL THE PUNK TONIGHT: A PUNK ROCK CELEBRATION OF DISNEY MUSIC: Sat., Aug. 26, 3 p.m., $25. Delmar Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

CASH BOX KINGS: Sat., May 27, 8 p.m., $20. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

CHRIS SHEPHERD BAND: Sat., May 20, 7 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

COLT BALL: Mon., May 22, 5 p.m., free. Sun., May 28, 2 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

THE DAVE MATTHEWS TRIBUTE BAND: Wed., Aug. 23, 8:30 p.m., $20. Delmar Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

DENISE THIMES: Sat., June 17, 7:30 p.m., $25. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

DEVIN THE DUDE: W/ Quali-T & J Pizzle, Hayzie P. Newton, Jai Imani, Wed., May 31, 8 p.m., $20.50. Red Flag, 3040 Locust Street, St. Louis, 314-289-9050.

DIRTY DANCING IN CONCERT: Thu., Nov. 30, 7:30 p.m., $42-$92. Stifel Theatre, 1400 Market St, St. Louis, 314-499-7600.

DREW LANCE: Wed., May 24, 4:30 p.m., free. Wed., May 31, 4:30 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

DUHART DUO: Tue., May 23, 4 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

EMILY WALLACE AND ADAM MANESS: Thu., June 8, 7:30 p.m., $15. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

THE EMO NIGHT TOUR: Fri., July 7, 8 p.m., $13. The Hawthorn, 2225 Washington Avenue, St. Louis.

FACET: W/ Iron Linings, Van Buren, Sun., May 28, 8 p.m., $10. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

FLORIST: W/ Skullcrusher, Tue., July 25, 8 p.m., $25. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-498-6989.

G FLIP: Thu., Oct. 12, 8 p.m., $22.50. Delmar Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

GRAND FINALE: Sun., July 30, 7:30 p.m., free.

The 560 Music Center, 560 Trinity Ave., University City, 314-421-3600.

THE HAMILTON BAND: Thu., May 25, 9 p.m., $9. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

HAPPY LANDING: Thu., Oct. 5, 8 p.m., $17. Blueberry Hill - The Duck Room, 6504 Delmar Blvd., University City, 314-727-4444.

HEMBREE: Thu., June 15, 8 p.m., $15. Blueberry Hill - The Duck Room, 6504 Delmar Blvd., University City, 314-727-4444.

HUNTER: Thu., May 25, 3 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

HYPER TENSIONS: W/ the Uppers, Glass Mattress, Sat., May 20, 8 p.m., $10. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

JAZZ WITH A TOUCH OF SOUL: W/ Walter Beasley, Miki Howard, Fri., June 2, 7:30 p.m., $67.50. Grandel Theatre, 3610 Grandel Square, St. Louis, 314-533-0367.

J.D. HUGHES: Fri., May 26, 4 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

JELLY ROLL: Wed., June 21, 8 p.m., $79.99. Delmar Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314726-6161.

JOANN MCNEIL: W/ NNN Cook, Michael Williams, Thu., May 25, 8 p.m., $10. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

JOHN MCVEY BAND: Wed., May 24, 8 p.m., free. Sat., May 27, 8 p.m., free. Wed., May 31, 8 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

JOHNNIE TAYLOR TRIBUTE SHOW: Fri., May 26, 8 p.m., $25. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

JOYER: W/ Sundots, Shady Bug, Lucky Shells, Wed., May 31, 8 p.m., $10. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

KEPI GHOULIE: W/ The Kuhlies, The Jag-wires, Mon., May 22, 7:30 p.m., $15. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

KEVIN GRUEN: Tue., May 30, 4:30 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

KINGDOM BROTHERS BAND: Sun., May 28, 6 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

KROOKED KINGS: Sat., Oct. 7, 8 p.m., $22.50. Blueberry Hill - The Duck Room, 6504 Delmar Blvd., University City, 314-727-4444.

LA JONES BLUES: Thu., May 25, 7 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

LADY J HUSTON: Wed., May 31, 7 p.m., free. Missouri Botanical Garden, 4344 Shaw Blvd., St. Louis, 314-577-9400.

THE LADY J HUSTON SHOW: Fri., June 30, 7 p.m., $15. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

LIL YACHTY: Tue., Oct. 31, 8 p.m., $45-$79.50. The Pageant, 6161 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

LOMELDA: Thu., July 27, 8 p.m., $18. Blueberry Hill - The Duck Room, 6504 Delmar Blvd., University City, 314-727-4444.

LP: Wed., Nov. 15, 8 p.m., $35. The Pageant, 6161 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

MARGARET & FRIENDS: Wed., May 24, 3 p.m., free. Wed., May 31, 3 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

MARIEANN MERINGOLO: Sat., June 24, 7:30 p.m., $25. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

MARS SINCLAIR: W/ The Owen Ragland Trio, Fri., June 16, 7:30 p.m., $15. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

MARTY ABDULLAH & THE EXPRESSIONS: Fri., May 26, 8 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

MATT KRIEG: Tue., May 23, 6:30 p.m., $10. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

MOJO UNIVERSE: Fri., June 16, 5 p.m., $10. The Attic Music Bar, 4247 South Kingshighway Blvd., 2nd Floor, St. Louis, 3143765313.

MONDAY NIGHT REVIEW: W/ Tim, Danny and Randy, Mon., May 22, 7 p.m., free. W/ Tim, Danny and Randy, Mon., May 29, 7 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

MR. WENDELL: Thu., May 25, 4:30 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

MULTICULT: W/ The Conformists, Shitstorm, Fri., May 26, 8 p.m., $10. Platypus, 4501 Manchester Avenue, St. Louis, 314-359-2293.

MUSIC UNDER THE NIGHT SKY: Sun., July 9, 7:30 p.m., free. Washington University-Brookings Quadrangle, Brookings and Hoyt drives, University City.

MUSICAL TREASURES: Sun., July 23, 7:30 p.m., free. Washington University-Brookings Quadrangle, Brookings and Hoyt drives, University City.

MY MORNING JACKET: Tue., Nov. 7, 7 p.m., $37.50-$86.50. Stifel Theatre, 1400 Market St, St. Louis, 314-499-7600.

MYSTERY: A TRIBUTE TO KISS: Sat., Sept. 2, 8 p.m., $23. Delmar Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

NAKED MIKE: Tue., May 23, 7 p.m., free. Tue., May 30, 7 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

NEIL BYRNE: Sat., June 10, 7:30 p.m., $45-$100. The Gaslight Theater, 360 N. Boyle Avenue, St Louis.

OSSUARY: Sat., July 1, 9 p.m., $15. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-498-6989.

PEEZY: Sun., June 4, 8 p.m., $30-$35. The Hawthorn, 2225 Washington Avenue, St. Louis.

RESIGNATION: W/ Family Medicine, Fight Back Mountain, Portraits & Landscapes, Fri., May 26, 8 p.m., $10. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

RESPLENDENT: Sun., July 16, 7:30 p.m., free. The 560 Music Center, 560 Trinity Ave., University City, 314-421-3600.

RICH MCDONOUGH & THE RHYTHM RENEGADES: Sat., May 27, 3 p.m., free. Hammerstone’s, 2028 S. 9th St., St. Louis, 314-773-5565.

RINGO STARR: Sat., Sept. 23, 8 p.m., $55-$449. The Fox Theatre, 527 N. Grand Blvd., St. Louis, 314-534-1111.

RIVERBEND BLUEGRASS: Fri., July 14, 7:30 p.m., $15. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

ROBBY AND THE ROCKIN’ FOOLS: Sat., July 1, 5 p.m., $10. The Attic Music Bar, 4247 South Kingshighway Blvd., 2nd Floor, St. Louis, 314-376-5313.

ROBERT NELSON & THE RENAISSANCE JAZZ BAND: Sat., June 3, 7:30 p.m., $25. Kirkwood Performing Arts Center, 210 E. Monroe Ave., St. Louis, 314-707-1134.

ROGERS AND NIENHAUS: Thu., June 1, 6 p.m., $45. CommuniTree Gardens Nursery, 2194 Creve Coeur Mill Road South, Maryland Heights, (314) 533-5323.

RONALD RADFORD: Sun., June 4, 7 p.m., free. Ulysses S. Grant National Historic Site, 7400 Grant Road, Concord, 314-842-3298.

THE SAMPLES ACOUSTIC DUO: Sun., June 18, 7 p.m., $30. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

SARAH AND THE SUNDAYS: Mon., June 5, 8 p.m., $18. Blueberry Hill - The Duck Room, 6504 Delmar Blvd., University City, 314-727-4444.

SARAH SHOOK & THE DISARMERS: W/ Wheelwright, Wed., May 31, 7 p.m., $15-$20. Old Rock House, 1200 S. 7th St., St. Louis, 314-588-0505.

SEDATED: THE ULTIMATE RAMONES EXPERIENCE: Sat., June 17, 5 p.m., $10. The Attic Music Bar, 4247 South Kingshighway Blvd., 2nd Floor, St. Louis, 314-376-5313.

SOULJA BOY: Thu., May 25, 7:30 p.m., $35$79.95. Pop’s Nightclub, 401 Monsanto Ave., East St. Louis, 618-274-6720.

SPACED: W/ Squint, Direct Measure, Volition, Mon., May 29, 7 p.m., $10. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

THE ST. LOUIS STEADY GRINDERS: Wed., June 7, 7 p.m., $10. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

STEPHANIE FAULDERS: Tue., May 30, 6 p.m., $10. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

STEVEN WOOLLEY: Tue., May 30, 9 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

STRAIGHT NO CHASER: Tue., Dec. 19, 7:30 p.m., $29.50-$89.50. The Fox Theatre, 527 N. Grand Blvd., St. Louis, 314-534-1111.

SWEEPING PROMISES: Tue., Aug. 1, 8 p.m., $15. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-498-6989.

THIS IS WHAT YOU CAME FOR: Sat., June 17, 8 p.m., $13. The Hawthorn, 2225 Washington Avenue, St. Louis.

THE TOM SCHAEFER BAND: Thu., June 1, 7:30 p.m., $10. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

TOOSII: Sat., Sept. 2, 8 p.m., $34.50-$49.50. The Pageant, 6161 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

THE TWANGADOURS: Fri., June 9, 7:30 p.m., $15. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

VIOLENT J: Tue., June 20, 7:45 p.m., $30-$54.50. Pop’s Nightclub, 401 Monsanto Ave., East St. Louis, 618-274-6720. n

SAVAGE LOVE 45

Wash It Away

BY DAN SAVAGE

Dear Readers: We’re rerunning some very early columns while I recover from shoulder surgery. This column is from February 1999 the “Hey, Faggot” days — and doesn’t appear in the online archives.

HEY, FAGGOT: I feel dirty. Not dirt that can be wiped away with a Wet Nap, but two-cans-of-Ajax kind of dirty. Alas, no matter how hard I scrub, I can’t get the memory of this man off of me. The urge to grab an SOS pad and scrub my nether regions is almost irresistible. Long story short: I spent the last year ass-over-teakettle for an older man who never made me feel very good about myself. At the time I thought I loved him, but now the mention of his name makes me wish I were one of those aliens on “V” who can shimmy out of their fake human skin.

This is a man who refers to a certain male movie star, whom he met 20 years ago in an acting class, as “Robin.” This is a man who — IN ALL SERIOUSNESS — gives that speech about how he’s a loner, so please don’t fall in love with him. This man questioned every positive step I made in my life, in an attempt to keep me in obsessive crazy love with his rickety frame. I’m furious with myself for letting it go on as long as it did, and for ignoring the broken hip, butterscotch pudding, and adult diaper jokes my friends threw at me in an attempt to bring me to my senses.

Do not label me “bitter”— that’s too easy. What I need from you is an answer to a simple question. I know that not even Dan Savage can turn back time. I mean, if Cher can’t, you can’t… but I ask you, Dan, is there any way you can unsleep with someone?

Filthy in New York

Hey, FINY: On our own, neither Cher nor I have the power to turn back time. And are you even sure you would want us to — and I’m not making any promises here — if together Cher and I could turn back time? Be careful what you

wish for, FINY: because if together we could turn back time, you might be doomed to relive the whole nightmarish experience.

“Robin,” adult diaper jokes, questions about every positive step you make — all of it.

But if un-sleeping with this man is your goal, you don’t want time turned back. You want time to pass, and pass quickly. Because it only takes three to four weeks for your skin, your epidermis, to replace itself completely. Like those aliens in “V,” you’re constantly wiggling out of your human skin — only the process is a bit more subtle and hard to see. But for all intents and purposes, a month after this sorry affair ended, the skin covering your body never touched the skin covering his. You never even shook hands.

As for the rest of your body — vaginal canal, esophagus, stomach lining, rectum, and any other organs and orifices that came in contact with his organs or ejaculate — it’ll take more time for the cells comprising those tissues and organs to regenerate and replace themselves. But rest assured: you will, in time, have brand new everythings. The life cycles of various cells range from months to years, but soon enough you’re going to be a whole new woman, FINY, a woman who never touched that creep. So, there’s no need to take an SOS pad to your nether regions, as soon they won’t be the nether regions he touched. They’ll be new and improved nethers.

Brain cells, unfortunately, are not regenerated, so you’ll be stuck with the memories forever. You could regard them as having been falsely implanted by an unethical therapist, or, if that’s too passive, you could drink them away. Alcohol kills brain cells, and with a lot of cosmos and a little luck, you may kill the very cells that store the memories of this sorry affair. Be careful, however, that in your efforts to drink away your bad memories you don’t create new, equally regrettable ones.

HEY, FAGGOT: No one should take advice from a homosexual.

I have a gay uncle who always said I was his favorite relative, which was understandable since I loved him while others in our fam-

ily wanted him to go away. My fiancé and I met him one morning for coffee. When my fiancé left, my uncle advised me not to marry him because in my uncle’s opinion, my fiancé — with whom he’d had one cup of coffee! — was a homosexual, and our marriage would surely fail. I never intend to speak to my uncle again. But I know he will see this because he reads your column. I want him to know that my fiancé told me that he experimented with homosexuality in college, plus a few flings afterward, but he stopped a year before we met. Even more important, while he and I are celibate, and will be until we are married in April, we have spent a night together. I’m probably less sexually experienced than most 23-year-olds, but I do know what a man is supposed to do, and he did it all. Once we’re married, we intend to start a real family.

When my fiancé heard what my uncle said, he said that one of the main reasons he abandoned what he calls “the brown lifestyle” were all the envious old queens bitter at being denied the fulfillment only normal people can have. I used to believe in “live and let live,” but now I understand that straights

have to defend decency against the homosexual forces that would sabotage it. And we should never take advice from people like you and my uncle, who are on the wrong side in this war.

About to be Traditionally Wed

Hey, ATW: Here’s your letter, and while I won’t presume to offer advice to you, an engaged breeder, I have some for your uncle, one homosexual to another.

When your niece divorces the sorry-ass fag she’s about to marry — which is inevitable — don’t let her back in your life. She may have been nicer to you than other family members, but apparently, she held you in just as much contempt.

So, like most gay men, you can spot ’em, and when you sat down for coffee with your niece’s fiancé, you spotted one. You could have kept your mouth shut and played it safe, letting her marry the big homo. But you didn’t want to see your niece hurt, so you felt compelled to warn her. Telling someone an unpleasant truth takes guts, and I admire you. You did the right thing. Your niece, naïve and inexperienced, apparently thinks a man who’s capable of doing everything a man is “supposed to do” to a woman must be straight. Ha. She doesn’t know most gay men “successfully” have sex with women before coming out, and that it isn’t a difficult a thing to do, especially if one fantasizes about “the brown lifestyle” as one plows away. Additionally, it probably hasn’t occurred to her that the reason celibacy comes so easily to her fiancé is that he doesn’t desire her. If he were a straight guy, he wouldn’t want to wait 10 minutes to get at her pussy, much less until April. Again, you were right to point these things out to her.

When your niece dumps this cocksucker or gets dumped by him — which will hopefully happen before they start a “real” family — she’s going to come crawling back to you for sympathy and advice. And when she does, promise me you’ll tell her to suck your dick.

Send your burning questions to mailbox@savage.love Podcasts, columns and more at savage.love

“ We have spent the night together. I’m probably less sexually experienced than most 23-yearolds, but I do know what a man is supposed to do, and he did it all. Once we’re married, we intend to start a real family.”