FML [f*ck my life]
This set the bar for rule number 1: Go to El Rancho dressed in sweats or jeans and definitely trainers. Flip flops are a no no. While I was introducing myself and Jason to Jose, I was thinking all the while literally FML, this is a disaster and I am such a tit (one of my favourite words I might add). Of course I didn’t voice it out loud. I just said, “Hi! My name is Gina and I am here to experience what El Rancho has to offer!” The smile on my face that said otherwise, after all I’m not exactly the outdoorsy type. EDITOR’S NOTE The profanity begins! I bet there are a whole slew of other words she wanted to include. In addition to that, the whole outdoorsy thing is absolutely laughable since if there is anyone of staff more high maintenance than me, it’s Gina!
El Rancho had a lot to offer. Had I been dressed accordingly I would definitely still be there camping, hiking, rappelling and even bull riding. Yeah right! I settled for knife throwing, shooting (with real guns) and archery. I was briefed on each one of the activities. I pulled a Fida! I asked for paper and pen and started taking notes just in case I forgot what I had to do. Once I got the lesson and I sort of felt confident, I was given a tan coloured vest complete with fringe, a scarf around my neck and a holster for my gun. I looked like a cowgirl gone wrong. EDITOR’S NOTE Readers please try and imagine my face while I looked this over for the first time. Keep in mind I don’t get the images until way after I see the articles. I couldn’t wait to see Gina in her “home, home on the range” outfit. When I finally saw the pictures I laughed so hard- she really does look like a cowgirl gone wrong, hat and all.
I took 5 dramatic shots. Yes! I got better, still needed both hands, but my timing improved. Jason by contrast was a professional. The asshole beat me! THE MOTORIZED ISSUE
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