The Pembroke Bullfrog, Issue 5, 1960

Page 1

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THE

PEMBROKE BULLFROG being the periodical of THE J.C.R., PEMBROKE COLLEGE, OXFORD

HILARY TERM, 1960

Editor: C. F. H. 7essup. Sub-Editors: R. A. Cox, D. R. P. MacKilligin, R. J. Walker. Business Manager: A. T. S. Marron.

R

ESPLENDENT in porraceous green, this is the fifth Bullfrog to appear in the college, and the first of a new decade (or as some recalcitrant mathematicians insist, the last of the old). Whatever else the Sixties hold in store, it seems certain that they will see an extension of university education in this country both in the number of undergraduates and the college facilities available. Wholly admirable as this is, the creation of more widespread, equal educational opportunity will be hamstrung as long as the inordinately high prestige of Oxford, Cambridge and London remains unimpaired. Of course, at present there is little doubt that the big three can offer better and more widely recognised tuition than most other universities — except in specialised subjects such as agriculture. But given time and a great deal of money, there is no obvious reason why the provincials should not be able to attract qualitatively similar staff; the greater difficulty will be to overcome the snob appeal of an OxfordCambridge-London education. This is an attitude which seems likely to remain prevalent however high provincial university standards rise since it is not based on an objective comparison of the quality of the teaching or of the extent of collegiate as opposed to university life, but on an ingrained belief that since in the past Top People have normally been educated at the big three, this will continue to be so in the future. 3


It will undoubtedly be a long time before there is any significant change in this attitude, but it is surely unnecessary that undergraduates in the universities concerned should propagate it by a we-are-a-breed-apart approach. Despite the regular appearance of a Financial Tinges at breakfast this year, it is not immediately apparent that the superior respect with which an Oxford undergraduate tends to be treated by employers (or B.B.C. interviewers) is always warranted. Hence the debate on Pembroke's N.U.S. membership on another page. Although Mr. Birch cannot be accused of such naivite, there is little doubt that a good deal of support for his attitude emanates from a belief that we are different and therefore better than our confreres at Manchester or Leeds and that contact with them in any official capacity is undignified. This is surely an undesirable point of view, and since undergraduate intake in Pembroke is on a wider basis than many other Oxford colleges, we are in some ways in an admirable position to demonstrate that Oxford students are not so different from any others. For this reason it would seem a pity if Pembroke were to depart from the N.U.S., leaving the Oxford representation primarily in the hands of Trinity and Balliol. These are hardly typical present-day Oxford colleges, and they are even less likely to be characteristic of the Oxford of the future. C.F.H.J.

THE PEMBROKE POLL 1. Are you reading a science or an arts subject? Arts 72%; Science 28% 2. Did you attend a public or grammar school? Public school 49%; Grammar school 51% 3. Have you done National Service? Yes 36%; No 64% 4. Which political party do you incline towards? Conservative 63%; Labour 13%; Liberal 12%; Communist 2%; No political inclination 10% 5. Are you Protestant, Roman Catholic or Agnostic? Protestant 48%; Roman Catholic 6%; Agnostic 46% 4


6. Do you go to chapel: More than 6 times per term: Protestant 61%; R. Catholic 100%; Agnostic 1% Less than 6 times per term: Protestant 32%; R. Catholic —; Agnostic 22% Never: Protestant 7%; R. Catholic —; Agnostic 77% 7. Would you favour the legislation of divorce by consent? Yes 45%; No 55% 8. It has been suggested that flogging should be reintroduced for crimes of violence. Would you favour this becoming law? Yes 41%; No 59% 9. Do you or do you not disapprove of pre-marital sexual intercourse? Do disapprove 39%; Do not disapprove 61% Do you disapprove of sexual intercourse between engaged couples? Yes 36%; No 64% 10. Would it disturb you to learn that the girl you intend to marry was not a virgin? Yes 45%; No 55% 11. Do you believe that homosexuality between consenting adults in private should remain a legal offence? Yes 29%; No 71% 12. Have you decided what career you will take up when you leave Oxford? Yes 41%; No 59% 13. London University Union recently debated the motion: "That this house will not go into industry". Which way would you have voted? For the motion 30%, Against the motion 56% Abstain 14% 14. Do you play any kind of sport during term? Yes 68%; No 32% 15. Can you name the people who hold the following posts? Deputy Leader of the Labour Party (Bevan) Correct 62%; Incorrect 38% Foreign Minister of the West German Rep. (Brentano) Correct 48%; Incorrect 52% Prime Minister of France (Debre) Correct 49%; Incorrect 51% Vice Chancellor of Oxford University (Boase) Correct 32%; Incorrect 68% 5


16. Who or what are the following? Karl Heinz Stockhausen (Contemporary German electronic composer) Correct 6%; Incorrect 94% Georges Braque (Cubist painter) Correct 51%; Incorrect 49% Lindsay Anderson (Film Director) Correct 23% • Incorrect 77% Allan Ginsberg (Beat poet) Correct 26%; Incorrect 74% A. C. B. Lovell (Director Jodrell Bank Telescope) Correct 72%; Incorrect 28%

PEMBROKE OPINION . by David Mackilligin and Christopher Jessup F the 116 people who replied to the college opinion poll conducted at the end of Michaelmas term, 72% were reading for an arts and 28% for a science degree. 49% were educated at a Public School and 36% had survived National Service. This is probably reasonably representative of the college as a whole, although the proportion of Public School men would almost certainly have been lower if the significant distinguishing criterion — the fee paying one — had been explicitly insisted on. The average man in the grey flannel gown still feels an urge apparently to put "Public School Educated" after his name. An attempt was made to phrase the questions in such a way that they should avoid being "loaded" in any direction, but it is clear that a few people (deliberately or otherwise) succeeded in misconstruing them. Many complained of the impossibility of giving a straight Yes/No answer on the more complex issues involved — particularly to the questions on sex and divorce. But the very fact that people did feel this hesitation in responding to the more difficult questions indicates that for most of them the circumstances are very relevant — so relevant in fact that most of those polled said or implied (particularly with regard to divorce) that any expression of approval or otherwise would wait on an analysis of the situation concerned. Only a comparatively small number 6

0


seemed able to view such issues in terms of stark black and white principles. It is clear that nearly three-quarters of the college does not disapprove of pre-marital sexual intercourse, but — with the exception of an active minority — this is not a commendation of wholehearted debauchery. On this problem, the following reply is probably representative of a large part of the college: "I do not disapprove of pre-marital intercourse. But I am not an advocate of promiscuity. The evil lies in the social stigma of being or having an illegitimate child." As might be expected, attitudes to questions 7 and 9 were influenced by the religious views of those answering, though one Catholic supported divorce by consent. Obvious trends can be discerned on some of the other questions. Assuming that the sample is representative, half the college has no religion, favours divorce by consent and has not decided on its career. Three-quarters think the homosexuality laws should be repealed and are lamentably ignorant of the identity of the wellmannered gentleman who acknowledged their bowing and scraping (and in a foreign language) when they matriculated. There are significant minorities who favour the reintroduction of flogging and who do not like the idea of going into industry. Here is a selection of the reasons people gave for their "anti-industry" feelings: industry is "sordid, corrupt and completely materialist" . . • "appears to demand another set of moral principles" . . . "I've been in it! " . . . "the biggest rat-race outside boxing and the turf" . . . "dislike hierarchies" . . . "unsatisfying and narrowing; should be left to technicians and those already narrow" . . . "opposed to its autocratic structure" . . . "cut-throat and creepy". For the record, those who opposed industry were mostly practising Protestants from Grammar Schools and non-religious Public School arts men — a prize will be offered for a significant interpretation of this particular fact. Most alarming (or marvellous) of all was the extraordinarily high proportion of Conservatives and the extremely low number of supporters of the labour Party (13 %). Rumour has it that Oxford is ten years ahead of the rest of the country, in which case — in the light of certain results — the Bow Group has good reason to rejoice. But on the same assumption, we shall all be linguistic analysts by then anyway, which will make electioneering somewhat more interesting. Some further conclusions follow below, derived from breaking up the whole sample into arts-science, Public-Grammar School and religious-non religious categories. 7


(i)

Scientists if anything are slightly more religious than arts men and tend to be more right wing. They do, however, seem to be slightly less informed about current and cultural affairs than arts people. Scientists are also overwhelmingly "tougher" in their attitude towards violent criminals; 72% favoured the reintroduction of flogging as against 29% of the arts men. There was no evidence that fewer scientists than arts men play sports regularly, thus contradicting the prevalent myth (fostered by the scientists themselves) that they spend every afternoon in the laboratories. (ii) Public school men are neither more religious nor more right wing than those from Grammar Schools; but they do take more exercise (77% as against 57%) and are slightly more in favour of flogging (45% as opposed to 33%). (iii) Another interesting result was that no less than 25% of those who said they did not disapprove of pre-marital intercourse subsequently said they would be disturbed if the girl they intended to marry was not a virgin, thus implicitly setting up different standards of sexual behaviour for men and women. (iv) The results of the general knowledge questions at the end of the poll prove very little apart from the fact that the average man about quad is not as culchered as all that, and also that the standard of humorous-answer writing to opinion questionnaires is deplorably low. Inevitably, Karl Heinz Stockhausen was too hard to resist and he was the subject of the small quota of imaginative humour which did appear; a good many people declared that he was obviously in the food business and he was anonymously reported to be 'the man with fifty-seven split personalities'. Another dazed respondee evidently confused Stockhausen with his cousin, who at the time of the poll was apparently sailing down the Amazon on a grand piano. Professor Lovell was brought down to earth and referred to somewhat disparagingly as "branch manager of the Jodrell Bank". (v) Finally, besides taking less exercise, non-religious people tend to be better informed. Perhaps having rejected both body and soul as ways to salvation, they are more careful to keep their minds in trim. Or perhaps they cheat more . .

8


ULLAGE

I

T was dusk as the dirty little grey-backed woman moved across the street to the piled, slum-stoned house. The ;brew moved slowly because it was winter in her body and there was nothing to hurry for now. The booted ghost made no noise on the road. The shrew moved slowly on the dust that her boots kicked up at her knees hardly covered by the sack skirt. At the gutter she sat, crossing drunken legs behind stretched buttocks as she tumbled, then scraped the boots before her in the dust and sat still to wait for the light above her to go on. The eyelids were red in her grey face because she was an old woman who had dreamed too- much and now had red eyelids which were always open. She looked across to where the church threw up a mist about itself, and to where the factory stood beyond, with the smoke still-curled above the chimney. She was too old to scrub her knees for the Church-God or the FactoryGod, and had no interests in heaven or hell since she could afford no shares in either business. Her life had never extended beyond the limits of her clothes. Dust to dust she sat by the lamp-post. The light jerked on above her, then in the pub opposite. As her life, she would have liked to have gone back across the road. But she was too weak to get up and would just have to wait for the road-sweeper. She sat. A piece of greasy newspaper swept up against her sausage thigh, her hand reached slowly, pushed it away and let it travel on. As real darkness came she died, because there had been no one to mourn her while she lived. 9


TRUMPET BLAST AGAINST THE NATIONAL UNION OF STUDENTS

T

RADE UNIONS are the most borish examples of the More-for-Us clamourers, and it is regrettable to record that the National Union of Students bids fair to rival the Trade Unions in short-sighted policies, selfish principles and Communist leadership. There is no reason why those who indulge in higher forms of education should not have a recognised representative body which can liase between the government and its members on aspects of policy which affect students. The N.U.S. has failed, and deserves universal censure for the manner with which it has executed its assumed duties. Moreover, the Union is falling into disrepute for its continually accentuated self-importance. The first principle of the N.U.S. as laid down in its constitution is to be representative of all manner and classes of persons being educated at universities, teachers training colleges, and other institutions of post-school education. But the N.U.S. has no one from Oxford or Cambridge on its executive committee. Its newspaper "Student News" contains a wealth of entertaining but inconsequential information as to provincial universities, but reports from Oxford and Cambridge are infrequent and usually confined to athletic attainments. Thus, it is certain that the N.U.S. is nonrepresentative. It is a weapon of provincial universities' left-wing extremists used in strengthening their ranks at the expense of their seniors. One of the dangerous tendencies promoted by the N.U.S. is its policy of prematurely freezing the natural development of young people. Instead of regarding the time in state pupillari as a transitional period, a period in which to mature and ferment, student status is falsely considered a worthwhile end in itself. It therefore becomes a vehicle for potential adult ability and ambitions to be degenerated into an extended student period. Grants! This is the battle-cry which monotonously erupts from the N.U.S. champions when in action. "We are responsible for the substantial increases in government financial aid to students," 10


they say. Rubbish. The members of the distinguished Andersen Committee undoubtedly have taken a cross-section of undergraduate opinion, which in the light of the misrepresentative and provincially biased nature of the N.U.S., would have been of greater accuracy. Apathy is insufficient to defeat the N.U.S. in Oxford, for it is an organisation prepared to expand by mercenary propaganda; it appeals to men's pockets, not their integrity or intellect. Pembroke must prevent its unwary members from association with such an unsavoury misrepresentative body. D. H. BIRCH.

PEMBROKE AND THE N.U.S. A REPLY

M

UCH can still be done through closer participation in the National Union of Students to increase the personal opportunities open to all members of the J.C.R. The Union acts as the students' spokesman, voicing our views and needs to all concerned in student welfare. Besides its Joint Committees with the Association of University Teachers, N.U.T. and so on, it regularly advises an all party team of MPs and Peers; questions and debates in both Houses have been initiated in this way. It tackles local authorities direct and has been in the forefront of the battle to improve grants and facilities. Internationally, through its support for the International Student Conference (CO-SEC) and through the Identity Card, it provides cheap travel, exchanges, relief and seminars. It is completely free from all political bias, and does not belong to the Communist dominated International Union, of Students. Culturally, it runs the Drama Festival, weekend conferences and a debating tournament. In the vacation it finds jobs for those wanting them and runs International Farm Camps. Yet it is a purely voluntary organization run by students for students. Thus basically, the N.U.S. does two things: it strengthens every member in the struggle with the niggardliness of Bureaucracy, and it provides a vehicle 11


for serious discussions and for action in cultural and educational matters. By these means, the Union hopes to show that it is anachronistic to regard students simply as overgrown schoolboys. Oxford has been hampered in providing these advantages for us, partly by the obscurantism of the backwoodsmen, but mainly by the peculiarities of the college system here. As the N.U.S. widens its activity there is an increasing need to go in and indicate our special interests, and the following courses of action would set us well on the way: first, send representatives to the Working Parties and Conferences; second, enter the debating tournament at national level — to this end a debate has already been arranged with the London School of Economics in early February : third, consider sending motions to the Council for general discussion. Then, when we have established ourselves, our President might well stand for office on the Executive. In the N.U.S. there is a huge field of activity from which every member of the College may benefit. Don't be put off by the deceptive and usually self-confessedly unfounded innuendoes of the opposition. Strange though it may sound to the apathetic, Pembroke has both the resources and the ability to make the running nationally. All we need is the will to start; and it is high time we did. M. PARSONS.

THOSE PRESENT .

F

IRST and foremost on this list must come Mike Pitts; Mike, who has now been on the Cosmos committee for more than two years and was a Group Organiser for the Society during his first week in Oxford, has been elected President of the United Nations Student Association — a national organisation. Mike also become engaged recently, and on both scores he is certain of our best wishes. 1959 was a good year academically for Pembroke; there were five Firsts in Schools — going to Martin Bowman, Brian Keen, Geoffrey Lewis, Phil Revill and Nick Round — and Ewan Bowie won a Craven Scholarship. Our Albert also achieved scholastic prominence, though in a rather different direction . . , 12


Among Pembroke representatives in University Societies, pride of place must go to Ian Stewart, who is President both of the Heritage Society and the Piping Society (the latter's purpose is • "to encourage interest in the highland bagpipe" by meetings in the Alfred St. Gymnasium). Messrs. Linington and Cutts are Presidents of the Archaeological and Engineering Societies respectively, and Brian Birch is President of the Critical Society. David Bright emerges from the wilds of Hinksey from time to time to act as President of the Australian Society, David Frankel is Chairman of the University Israel Group and Phil Richardson directs the Socialist Club from Nuffield. Pembroke's resident poet, Bruno Scarfe, is Business Manager of "Oxford Opinion", Geoffrey Hargreaves is Librarian for the Newman Society, Bob Mahy is Treasurer of the John Wesley Society and Miles Dodd is Secretary of the Ship Society. Mike Parsons is Press Relations Officer for the national "Young Liberals" association, the Union of Liberal Students; and he may be standing for the Presidency of this organisation in April. If he does so, we wish him every success. Last, but not least, is the most dangerous man in the college: John Melland, who is Secretary of the University Rifle Club, which fosters an interest in ".22 shooting, (standing, kneeling or prone)". Military funerals a speciality.

KEYS

S

OME people I have met Have a thing about keys, So they forge them. Bunches of them Loads of them. But the first question to ask, Tell me if I'm wrong, is What for God's sake Do you do with even a single key When The box before you hasn't even got a lock. WALE OLUMIDE.

13


Presidential Prattle

A

S the College expands in numbers, so the J.C.R. becomes an increasingly important part of its members' lives, and its role changes. The material comforts of fifty years ago — breakfast in one's rooms, a scout to light the coal-fire and make the toast, financial means of one's own (the First Eight used to be entertained to breakfast by volunteers; how would a "tea-list" go down today?) — all these have gone. The J.C.R. must provide more communal luxuries; this we have tried to do. The last year has seen the arrival of television in the beer-cellar, a new carpet, new paint on the walls and fewer footprints on the ceiling, a library of walker's maps, shoe-cleaning materials in the telephone kiosk (to make use of those otherwise wasted minutes) a chess-set (unintentionally dealing a severe blow at the Bridge school, who have made a swift change to Poker and gone underground) and other lesser improvements to the undergraduate lot. The completion of the New Quad is drawing nearer (at present invisibly) and there is reason to hope that at last the living-out members are to be allowed to share in the improvements being made to the college. We have our eye on the room at the foot of staircase 3 as a potential locker-room ond writing room for this under-privileged class. The room would be under the control of the J.C.R., and would provide a number of amenities, including some means of brewing a cup of coffee, locking up valuables, 14


writing blank verse and so on. Far too many freshmen, and even more second-year Scholars, find themselves with an unexpected crop of friends, some of whom they have never seen before, when the annual exodus to digs takes place. If the suggestion is adopted, it should relieve those in college from such pressure. Meanwhile the new pavilion, by the generosity of the late Mr. Drake, is expected to arise from the ruins of the old during the 1960 long vacation. Good news for all sportsmen with their feet on the ground; but let one prophet cry now in the wilderness of the riverside, that this College must very soon set about building a boat-house, or be left hopelessly behind, and, when the Barge sinks or falls to pieces as it shortly will, and the O.U.B.C. boathouse is no longer available, be without storage space for boats or grandstand accommodation for spectators. This is no mere Boat Club grumble, but concerns the whole College just as the new pavilion has done. The material acquisitions already mentioned may go on the credit side of the J.C.R. record, and with them the fact that amicable relations, on the whole, have been preserved with the S.C.R., Lodge, and Staff, without loss of dignity on either side. For much of this the J.C.R. Committee may justifiably take credit, particularly that unappreciated diplomat of diplomats, the Food Member. But there is a debit side too; while it is fundamental that J.C.R. meetings are a very small part of the work of the J.C.R. Committee (and anyone who thinks this is a sinecure should try Bartlett's job for a week), it is also true that such meetings are the only function of the J.C.R. as a body. And it must be sorrowfully recorded that on the whole they have been downright dull. Some of the fault must lie with the Chair; it takes time to learn when the mailed fist is required, and when the velvet glove. But until very recently J.C.R. meetings were much too easy to run. Where was the fire, the wit that enlivened, the clowns and intellectual oddities that bestrode, the twice-termly evening of alcoholic administration? Was this really Johnson's College? Recently, thank goodness, an improvement could be detected. Far better to let off steam at a J.C.R. meeting with its potentially high entertainment value, than to write nasty letters in that repository of would-be Juniuses, the Suggestions Book. The re-introduction of the Smoking Concert ("Smokers") in the Hilary term may be a step in the right direction. There is much untapped talent in the College; one hopes that it will flow as freely as the beer. A great amount of enjoyment can be got out of the J.C.R. -- not just by being jolly good chaps together, a 15


nauseating prospect, but by using the many opportunities it offers to poke fun at oneself and other people. De-bunking is a worthwhile Oxford pastime, and there are many things in Pembroke that would be better for some good-humoured rudery. A. V. H .

SPENNITHORNE, 1959

S

INCE the last 'Bullfrog' report on the Oxford-Borstal camps Lincoln and Univ. have started camps and Exeter may join us this year. The Pembroke camp was the last of the 1959 series, and with us at Spennithorne were about twenty-five lads from Pollington Borstal. Spennithorne is a small village at the foot of Wensleydale on the north bank of the Ure, and it has as Rector Jo Jory, a Cornish ex-naval chaplain, blessed with extraordinary perseverance, a gloriously resonant voice and an ability to work nineteen hours a day. These camps were his idea, abetted by our Chaplain, and he and Mrs. Jory act as hosts. The purpose of the camps is not sociological, nor to 'convert' as many people as can be `got'. Rather are they an attempt to make available to Borstal lads things which they may never have met before — understanding, acceptance, hospitality; if you like, Christian love. Though many try, it is almost impossible for a Borstal officer to make contact on this level. Also, to let the lads know what it is like to be among a close-knit, functional Christian community, where no-one compels them to do anything, or preaches at them, but where a serious question will get a serious answer. The traffic is far from one way; the camps act as an eyeopener to the Oxford people too. If nothing else, the popular concept of the Borstal boy as a mentally deficient, promiscuous, vicious sub-species of adolescent is completely demolished by our own experience. My own impression, after two camps, is of people my age or slightly younger who have suffered from careless fathers or tooindulgent mothers, from too little love or too much doting; or who resent the institutionalisation of their lives from orphanage to Borstal; who may always have lived in squalid, amoral conditions and accept that they will die in them; who have sometimes given up caring whether any action is right or wrong; whose usual topics 16


of conversation are sport, sex and pop-singers; and nearly all of whom are very likeable. When the Pollington lads arrived we had been at Spennithorne for a day or two preparing the site and also ourselves. A 'me and my mate' policy soon divided the campers into groups of four, two Oxford and two Pollington. These groups are the basic unit, and do more or less everything together — sleeping in the same tent, washing-up, spud-bashing, hiking. The cameraderie which develops within a group can be and often is quite tremendous. For ten days we were based on Spennithorne. We went to Ripon Cathedral and Fountains Abbey, to Castle Bolton and Aysgarth Falls. We tackled Great Whernside, lost to the village at cricket, and swam. Those who wanted to went to the daily Communion and Offices in the Church, and the camp day closed with short prayers in the dining marquee. The highlight was probably the hike. Each group set out with provisions for three days, and most covered forty miles or more. For two nights the campers slept in barns and byres, and though not everyone could say they enjoyed the experience, barriers were being broken down. In addition, the hospitality of the Dalesfolk made a deep impression. The most valuable periods probably came when nothing organised was happening; in the tent, late at night; in a barn after a day's walking; lying half-drowsy on a sunny lawn. These were times when frank questions met with frank answers, when pedantry counted for nothing in comparison with common sense and sincerity, and when every accessible subject could be discussed. Eventually we struck camp and went back to Pollington. The Borstal consists of a duster of large huts round a barrack-type square, and is completely open — there is no guard fence. Our fellow campers made it easy, introducing us to their dormitory mates, showing us round, warning us about the food and telling us which screws were good and which were not . . . The food is, in a word, rough. Nevertheless, all the lads put on weight, and work and sport keeps them far more fit and healthy than most of their contemporaries 'outside'. In three days we had just time to meet some more generally very pleasant people, to work alongside them in the fields, the kitchens, the carpentry shop . . . to get a taste of the run-round at 6.10 a.m. sharp; to watch the telly in the evenings, play records or table-tennis or cricket, and talk some more. And then we were away. But we hope that many of us will meet again — in Oxford or our own homes. And, meanwhile, there are letters to write. M. P. BERRY. 17


ART COMMITTEE REPORT

T

HE Committee is glad to announce that many more paintings than of recent years are now in circulation both in and out of College. There seems to be a slight revival of interest in painting after a long period of apathy. We hope this is a pointer to the future. Six new paintings have been purchased since last June. Five of these are by young and struggling artists who were grateful for our alms, and only one is by an established artist — R. J. Hitchcock. However gratifying it feels to be a patron of the needy artist fighting for recognition of his talent, the results are often far from satisfactory. It must be admitted that Hitchcock's oil painting "Jonah's Conflict" is by far the most engaging addition to the collection. Colourful and full of movement it is already recognised as one of Hitchcock's best paintings to date. By the end of the Academic year it is hoped that many of the thoughtless frames, which have detracted attention from some of our notable paintings, will be replaced by frames more suited to their subject. Twelve paintings have already been reframed, and one of these, "Bird's Nest" by R. T. Durran, which went unacknowledged in its original frame, owes to its new frame its recent popularity. Minton's 'Bridge at Cannon Street Station' was repaired and cleaned in December 1959. There has been a notable change in policy. In future the Committee will recommend that the J.C.R. sells paintings which we consider neither valuable nor entertaining. In this way the overall quality of the Collection will be greatly enhanced. Cecil Collins "Listening Bird" has been on loan in December 1959 to London where it was placed in a retrospective exhibition of Collins' work. Finally a grateful word of thanks to my Committee members for services rendered, and further thanks to all of those who save us from redundancy by selflessly paying their termly half-a-crown. D. H. BIRCH (President).

18


GUILLOTINE THE sun's shafts pitted The rusting path, And flaked leaves, shaking Tilted, tripped and fell: The Persian gold Swam heavy on the ground. From other trees slipped Leaves of a vanished Still-present time; Curling, dry-green At their lisping edge, They floated on gravel Like pond-leaves In the lost heat Of the lost summer. The steel wind Had guillotined The trees; Curled copper hair, Smile-eyes Snatched me From the rasping razor's edge.

SMILE-HAVOC DRAW, knife, draw The tears, the pain, the blood Strung wirewise And wrapped around the thorn-wood Of a thy-stoned love. None so bitter As the salt-almond eyes of an image, Vision not for me, no-one, never. BRUNO SCARFE. 19


Letters to the Editor . . . compiled by David Mackilligin THE S—ND—Y EXPR—SS I wonder if many readers have noticed the astonishing likeness between Princes Margaret and the Javanese lass who was given the Miss World title this week. Truly, beauty is the same the world over, and Nature's work can be little improved by breeding and education, important though these are. (Mrs.) N. C. Molesworth. Hook Road, Surbiton. Mrs. Molesworth is right! — compare the photographs in column five. But surely it is high time the Miss World title was awarded to a girl from the Empire.

THE DA—LY T—L—GR—PH Sir, Your correspondent's doubtless well-meant comment on the possible inexpediency of some legislation recently passed by the South African government is surely rather wide of the mark. I had the honour to serve in Sir Ivor Cuthbertson's expeditionary force to Southern Sinustan (1904-5), and my experience in that inaccessible part of the world leads me to believe that however much is done for him your average native will never succeed in grasping what Western Civilisation is about. The best one can do for him is to make absolutely sure he has as few opportunities as possible of making a nuisance of himself. Recent colonial history has demonstrated the impracticability of any other policy, and the South African government is to be commended for facing facts so objectively. Yours faithfully, Gerald Muir, Major, R.A. (Retd.) Mafeking, Seaview Drive, Eastbourne, Sussex. 20


C— —NTRY L—F-(from Lady Craigmantle-Harvey) Sir, I have a small metal implement in my possession and wonder whether you can offer any clues as to its exact origin and use. It is something of a family heirloom, and was given me by my father, who lived to the ripe old age of ninety, and as a young man actually met the Duke of Wellington! Tradition has it that it is a XVII century wax candle trimmer of Huguenot make, but unfortunately it is in a very rusty condition, as my father used to tickle trout with it (and very successfully too, he often boasted! ). Cynthia Craigmantle-Harvey. Battleaxe Abbey, Yorkshire. Mark Cavendish writes; From the sketch you have enclosed of the implement, is is evidently an early Northumrian tool used for dismantling coracles, called a whyfte. This example was probably made at the smithy operated by the monks on Slarrit Island, and its date may be about 642,but without seeing the actual implement I cannot be certain.

DRUNK I NTO the tiny glowing bowl I dropped my soul, And watched it sink and melt away Into a thousand gay Pretences, clouds of love and laughter, Changing after To tears of ice-cold rubied hue, Weeping wounds which rue The fate of man: in pain arriving, Vainly striving After immortality; Insanity! And so the glass of wine I drain To scatter pain, And soul returns to stomach once again. ROLAND CARGYLL,

21


RUGBY UNION FOOTBALL

T

O the Pembroke College Rugby Union Football Club, Pembroke College, Oxford. Sirs: Your Committee requested our firm to study the game Rugby Union Football with a view to making recommendations as to means of rendering the game more efficient. We have observed games of the said Rugby Union Football at such venues as Twickenham, Cardiff, Kirkstall, Otley, Iffley Road, and beyond the railway next to Oxford City gasworks. The following observations and recommendations are offered. 1. SCRUMS. Time is wasted in preparing for scrums and in awaiting the emergence of the ball from the back row. Effort is wasted in pushing before the introduction of the ball and after its emergence, also in activities not primarily directed to the winning of the ball. At least two members of each pack appear to be superfluous to the actual push achieved (all eight at the last named venue). In 246 out of 250 scrums the ball came out on the side of the team putting it in. Recommendations : (a) That the number of members of the scrum be reduced. One man per side should be sufficient. (b) If recommendation (a) is regarded as too drastic, the ball should be put by the scrum half into the second row of his own scrum. In those cases where the ball came out on the 'wrong' side of the scrum the result could be attributed to the inefficiency of the 'right' side's hooker. This recommendation would render such inefficiency less probable. 2. LINES-OUT. Many members of the lines-out took no active part in the winning of the ball for their side. Much effort was wasted on activities not connected with this aim. Scrummings followed immediately on lines-out in 391 out of 407 examples. Recommendations : (a) Lines-out should be replaced by scrums; or (b) Only one forward from each side should take part. (cf. 1(a) supra). 3. THREE-QUARTER BACKS. These men were kept idle for the greater part of the game and even on receiving the ball tended only to pass it out to other three-quarter backs. Great inefficiency was noticed in the above activity. Recommendations : (a) There should be only one threequarter back to reduce the chances of inefficiency along the 22


line; or (b) While not actively engaged in the game the threequarters should be engaged in other useful work such as cutting the grass, and marking out the lines. 4.

OUTSIDE-HALF.

The same observations and recommend-

ations apply as above. We have no recommendations to make 5. SCRUM-HALF. as to the conduct of this player who operates continuously and under extremely difficult conditions. 6. FULL-BACK. Observation here differed considerably but following our observations at the last-named venue we recommend that this player be dismissed as redundant. (No hard feelings, Bob). 7. PLACE-KICKING. A regrettable inaccuracy was everywhere observed in this department of the game.

Recommendation: A machine could surely be developed to perform this task with complete accuracy. 8. THE BALL. From observations at the second-named venue we have reached the conclusion that the aforementioned object is T. S. GILLIN unnecessary in Wales.

DIM PEDRO'S CRADLE TALK

F

OR close on a year (though it may seem longer to our more thin-skinned readers) we have criticised and generally ridiculed the social activities of undergraduates. We have reported their activities without a trace of sympathy and consider ourselves fortunate in finding so much scope for our powers of denigration. The' moment has come, we feel to curtail our amusement at other people's efforts to impress and to divulge the secret of really first-class party-giving. However, lest a note of condescension should creep in, we do admit that we have crashed at least three parties with possibilities in our two years in Oxford. First a few basic principles. A fashionable host should insist that the fruits never speak. They may wheeze ecstatically, they may comment succintly, they may even murmur approvingly; but must never actually speak. That would be quite rebarbative. 23


A crew of ornamental futilities is a great asset at any party. Position them carefully at key points about the room, so that once their falsettoes have been picked up by any gossip columnist who has crashed the party, their more fatuous remarks may be noted down and later published for public approval. Rather than detail any more rules, we have decided to describe our own party which we held last Sunday afternoon and which is a lesson in itself. In case you weren't invited, the party was thrown in the South Schools. Admittedly, the place was rather large for the seventy invited but we felt, as did all the people we questioned, that the somewhat wasted air was amply compensated for by the distinctive portraits about the walls. Mike Horniman crashed his way in and quickly out, when he saw us. Let's face it, Mike doesn't relish our witty tilts at him, though we spend a lot of time on them. Shy Martin Timms provided us with some cheap amusement in his efforts to be sociable with Saul Snoot, who put in a condescending appearance. Marsden Deckley was there also. He left early in pursuit of one Heather Sears. No one seemed to know who she was. She definitely wasn't invited. She certainly hasn't been seen in our company since. At half-past four everyone rushed out to have tea with their vicars and left us with our birds, our empty bottles and our unspeakable success. GEOFFREY PIECRUST.

WHO'S WHO, 1999 HUGHES OF HENLEY, O.B.E. AFTER a distinguished school and university career, "Tony" Hughes (as he was always to be known by a few chosen intimates) became an adminstrator in the Western Pacific for the Colonial Service. The darker moments of his life there should not be ignored — the Gilbert and Ellis Islands rebellion (1963-76) is well known, and Hughes' responsibility for the Malagga Bay massacres — the direct result of his ill-fated attempt to persuade the islanders to abandon canoeing in favour of some other form of water transport — must not go unmentioned, 24


Retiring early, Hughes bought a farm in N. Wales, organising the entire area as his district and submitting detailed reports to the Colonial Office. The local farmers regarded him as a harmless eccentric and were even prepared to attend his agricultural advisory open-air meetings. His scheme to give them compulsory Blackwater fever injections was, however, resisted. In later life Hughes became well known in a more specialised field. His three volume epic "Pins and Needles — their Nature, Prevention and Cure" remains the standard work on the subject, and was filmed by the Revolting Brothers as "The Seven Year Itch". Subsequently, he wrote a best-selling novel "The Scratcher in the Rye" for which he was awarded his Order of British D.R.P.M. Entomologists plaque.

BARON SMITH OF MAIDSTONE AND THE RT. REVD. DR. MARK WILLIAMS THE careers of Lord Smith (created a Life Peer in 1989) and Dr. Williams have been inextricably combined since they first achieved prominence in organising the successful strike at British Rubber Products Ltd., which, in the words of the then Prime Minister Earl Welensky, P.C., "threatened . . . to curtail those evening activities which have for so long been the backbone of the Empire." Appointed Directors of Psychological Class Warfare by the Eighteenth International, Lord Smith and Dr. Williams were instrumental in ending the twenty-nine years of unbroken Conservative government in 1980 by their revelations that certain members of the Cabinet were secretly educating their progenies at public schools (declared subversive in 1970 as exponents of educational techniques tending to create alarm and despondency). Employing their powerful brainchild, the Institute of Adsuasion, Dr. Williams and Baron Smith swept to power in the resulting election on the slogan : "Disestablish the establishment." Dr. Williams subsequently left Baron Smith's government to take up the appointment of Dean of Canterbury in 1984. For those of the younger generation who may be ignorant of the fact, the original donkey jacket worn by Lord Smith on the occasion of his first strike meeting is displayed at the Smith Museum, Smith Place; his socks may also be inspected. C.F.H.J. 25


THEIR EXCELLENCIES DR. JOHN WOODCOCK AND DR. DAVID BARTLETT CREATED joint Directors of the Council to promote Councils for the furtherance of Anglo-Soviet Cultural relations, Drs. Woodcock and Bartlett were directly responsible for the successful Soviet invasion of the popular music industry during the last quarter of the twentieth century. Their first triumph came in 1975 when Dr. Woodcock's composition "Olga from the Volga" remained top of the pops for five years in all the juke-boxed nations of the world; sung in resonant proletarian baritone by Dr. Woodcock, this musical gem was accompanied by Dr. Bartlett on the Ukranian ukelele — treasonably dubbed by his (since liquidated) anti-cultural, rightist deviationist opponents as "St. Ebbe's guitar". Drs. Bartlett and Woodcock continued their saga of success with "Red Square Dance" (1980) and "Got myself an engineering, road-constructing Party doll' (1983); but it was their 1985 offering which assured their immortality -- "I'm only sixteen tons", subtitled "The Lament of a Lightweight Uzbekstan Caterpillar Tractor". Cultural authorities the world over lavished praise on this song; Kenneth Tynanski, writing in Londonskaya Pravda, said : "Never before has the profound emotional instability of the plain tractor been portrayed with such magnificent sublimity, such tender compassion." Ten years after they received this accolade of universal admiration, Drs. Woodcock and Bartlett became Honorary Doctors of Music in the University of Oxford. In 1992, in their capacity as Distinguished Friends of the USSR, Drs. Bartlett and Woodcock were invited to visit the Peoples' Republic of China, and they have not been heard of C.F.H.J. since. from: `MOREBLOWER — A BIOGRAPHY' (Blower & Moore). 5 gns. AN ageing figure was seated on the white sand, just out of the sun's reach under a palm tree. He was grizzled and deeply tanned — you would have guessed his age as sixty, and that his had been a life out-of-doors. In his hand was a coconut shell, and with a knife he was fashioning from it a shoulder-pad. He tried it on his shoulder, and with a few deft strokes of the knife perfected its fit. He stood then a few paces from the palm-tree, and with extraordinary agility hurled himself horizontally at it. The palm snap26


ped clean in two where his shoulder struck it, and crashed upon the sand. Mooreblower grunted with satisfaction, and picked himself up. He dusted the sand off his still-muscular thigh, and reflected that life out here was not too bad. Through the remaining palm-trees came the sound of girlish laughter, where some of his wives were trying to decipher one of his old Economics essays that he had brought with him, nearly forty years ago, when Whitehall sent him out. Sometimes he felt the faintest nagging doubt — had they forgotten all about him? But he thrust the thought away. After all, he had wives galore, and though there was no rugger — he recalled his initial dismay years ago — there A.V.M. were plenty of palm-trees. KELLY, NEIL FRANCIS, J.P., Hunslet, Leeds. m: Daphne e.d. of 3rd Marquis of Stone, K.G. (1976). 1965-8 stationmaster, City Station, Leeds. 1968 elected treasurer of the Yorkshire Fine Arts Movement. Tried for embezzlement 1970; acquitted. 1971, spent winter in Barbados. Owns pictures by Gainsborough, Kneller and Cuyp. Two daughters, Patricia Mary and Mary Patricia; one son, Giles, second husband of Anthea Cox, starlet. Publications: 'A Miscellany of Ballads for the Irish Exile' (1965) and a critical monograph on "Nearer My God to Thee." (1971). Addresses: c/o Sandon Hall, Stone, Staffordshire, and 594 Gravier Street, Leeds 6. Recreations: the trombone and Latin verses. Clubs: Hunslet Working Men's G.H. T. S. GILLIN — 1962—Head of Educational Department of Radio Luxembourg. 1969—Chief of B.B.C. Sports Broadcasts for Lundy and C,aldy. 1974—Editor of "The Country Gentleman" (incorporating "The Social Whirl"). 1977—Married Rt. Hon. Angeline Goldstein: retired on death of wife's father. 1985—Mayor of Sedburgh: President of Mid-Yorkshire Farmers' Debating Socy. 1989—Lib. M.P. for Leeds South; Minister of Arts; established "Gillin Scholarships" to R.A.D.A. 1994—Defeated at G.E.; accepted Life Peerage : Lord Gillin of Hunstanton. 27


1999—Sat on Royal Commission into decline of Yorkshire tripe industry. Recreations: Sport (spectating and reporting); soirees; lecturing; play-going. Publications : "Good News" a collection of anecdotes, essays and memories, privately published in seven volumes (1983). "Diaries" condensed version in Reader's Digest (Mar. 1991); serialised in "The Ilkley Bi-monthly Advertiser" from 1992 to 1998. Clubs: "The Sherlock Holmes"; Leed's Union; Crawford's; M.H. "The Whip and Brush"; Raymond's. THOMAS BEHAN O'FLAHERTY STANFORD, M.A., R.A. D.Bib. Noted Irish philanthropist, philosopher, politician and tribolgist. Educated Tory Isle, Dublin, and Pembroke, Oxford; Bacchus Prize for Philosophy 1960; Labour M.P. for Brigg (Lines) 196779; on the collapse of the nationalised breweries in 1980, he accepted the post of Economic Adviser to the I.R.A. G.H.Q. He was later responsible for the successful nationalisation of the Poteen industry. His publications include: "1001 Ways with Potatoes", "Drunken-Driving made Easy", and "Collected Illegible Letters", the last being under the nom-de-plume of Mud Munni. He is currently working on the design for a Gaelic Coffee T.C. machine. HERBERT, Sir Michael, O.B.E., b Bimingham 1937, K.E.B. and Pembroke College, Oxford. 2nd Cl. Hons. Mod. Hist. Permanent Under-Secretary to the Minister of Arts 1996; Actor: Widow Twankey in Aladdin, Widnes 1960-1, as "Your friend and mine Mickey Fynne (Clean but Funny)" in vaudeville throughout the country 1961-1989. Impressario: "Strip Goes a Million" 1975-8, "We Never Clothed" 1978-9, "No Flies on Us" 1979 (2 days), "New (d) Sensations of 1981-2-3-4-5", "Babes in the Nude" Christmas 196179, 1981-5. Gen. Sec. Equity 1982-5. 1985 Formation of Min. of Arts. Under-Secretary to Permanent Under-Secretary for Burlesque, 1994 Permanent Under-Secretary to Permanent Under-Secretary to Minister of Burlesque O.B.E. 1996 Permanent Under-Sec. to Ministry of Arts. Kthood. Clubs: Savage, T.G. Athenaeum, Boot. 28


CONVERSATION PIECE "Know what `Tio Pepe' means?" "No." "Uncle Joe." "You mean Tio Pepe means Uncle Joe?" "Yea." Silence. Jones tried again. "How do you like it here?" "I don't." Silence once more. Jones tacitly mourned the loss of yet another conversational gambit. Then, looking out of the window, he had an inspiration. "Say, it's raining. Wonder if it's raining back home." As this elicited no response, he went on: "I come from Southampton." Long pause. Then, in desperation, "Where do you come from?" "Bolton." "I've never been there. What's it like?" "Just a town." "Nice folks?" "Same as anywhere else." "Ever been to Southampton?" "No." "Pity, you'd like it there." Silence. "Got any girl-friends?" "I don't talk about my girl-friends." Long pause. "You don't talk much about anything, do you," said Jones. "Come off it, mate. If we've got to spend ten years together in this cell, we'll have to keep something in reserve." ROLAND CARGYLL.

29


FRONDS

T

HINGS are falling apart, I am convinced, and we are to be the witnesses of the final spasms of this run down machine. Thus Cancer sidles down on us from her station in the sky, and grips the four corners of the earth. Her claws are eaten away by a red rust of growth, whose fronds wave and suppurate in the blank whiteness of moon-shine. Claws snap, but contagion has spread to our Mother, to her seams and veins, seeps through strata and rages along rivers, to burgeon in a last proliferation of malformed and sickly growth. And here am I crouched in my eyrie, high above the courtyard, survey a damp world through streaming panes. Our decay flourishes in symptoms of thaw; but with the dwindling snows melt the porous surfaces of brick and stone; foundations grind unbeknownst as earth subsides. Sunday tea-time : I wait for her foot upon the stairs. Scientists giggle inanely across the landing, and Freshmen kick a ball about the room below. I light another cigarette and watch the layers of blue smoke wreathe and drift across my bulb. She does not come. The bird, for one week frozen to my sill, tumbles from his perch, plummets to dark flower-bed •earth. On evenings like this, when unearthly mauve light stains the sky, and•mist involves houses and towers; on such evenings (I say) I may easily add crimson flame and rolling water-falls of yellow smoke from the fires of my imagination. Violence unwinds through the city, scrawled across all its skylines, where, like Blackfly on briars, a thousand midget figures run and stumble in obsessive slaughter before my eyes—black against petals of flame. I sack Oxford in my spleen. But she is reserved for another end and built expressly for ruin and decay. This the masons had in mind as they piled high walls, and towers, and domes : the trickle of mortar, stone prised from stone by spreading root and fibre of plant. This and no other. Oxford finds fulfilment of beauty in Ruin, it is the consummation of the city. Continually in my dreams, I assure you, the horsemen ride into Radcliffe Square; rein back, awed by the Camera's massy, greenstained wreck. The dome sags, stripped of lead for a debased coinage. When they intrude owls hoot and laugh down corridors of gloom, rats scuttle over refuse of small bones and dirt, birdcarrion. Yet, breaking into the vaulted dungeon of Lower Camera, the Vandals are checked: under their sooty pall of dust sit ranks 30


of girls, peer through lenses. Spiders have stretched their lines round nylon-clad thighs, and spun their fine webs from suspenderclip to suspender-clip: a whole network of dust-laden threads. They have also mated in their Nests, which fact ascertained preserves from rape, and Vandals tip-toe from those echoing vaults. I stub my cigarette and light another, I strain to catch her footsteps on the stair. I begin now to plan my Arthuriad. From Camelot into the oceans of the Western night stumble my hipster heroes. Ragged by thorn and blade, their armour rusted solid (the autumn woods weep leaves upon them), they rave through a thousand way-side adventures, travailing on that impossible quest for an incomprehensible VISION of grail. Forever by their own bodies betrayed they discover that this same chalice for which they fumble is the repository of girl-soul and white-hot desire: they awake in the grey dawns of Logres, demented, severed from identity, aware only that not Galahad but perpetually Launcelot rides within them involved through time with pursy Guinevere. I wonder if it will be a success? What knowledge inhabits you, my poet-heroes, bums of the C5 Renaissance, takes you into the slanting rain that smokes among the windy valleys of Cumberland, or time-wrecked Eburacam and Bethnal Green? You tell Miranda, o muse, my raddled Quean, who has inspired me in my earliest attempts under the beech in summer woods. Sorrows and ache for vision drive them sobbing and mouthing into the grinning teeth of Death himself, who had designed expressly for them this masquerade of pomp and kettledrum; for them in his infinite pity he had clothed his bony fingers in velvet and drawn them softly home into his chinky breast, the cage of non-being, & etc. Partial release, and I am at least a little happy; lay down my pen; throw open the window. Through the swirling wall of fog I image for myself the people in this city, and claim them as my own. Comes a light knock upon the door: she is full of contrition and excuse. She kneels beside me on the window-seat; together we gaze into the white void. Her flaming hair brushes my cheek, and absorbs my tears. Our breath plumes in the cold air. What a drag. RICHARD COX

31


GRAIN-SEED TAY awhile, Lady with sleet in your veins And look at the eyes of your child. Peer close at the briars Which tangle their depths And the ruins which loneliness piled. Forget, forget your daughter's cool hand (So sapphic Seraphic the way that she smiled) Turn back to your son For his bones are atwist And his fingers are crippled and wild. And in the distress Of his innocent need Accept with a pitying smile The black-burning kisses He sets an your throat Come stay with your son for a while.

S

G. HAIIREAVES.

UNASKED NTO a world Bomb blown and war torn; I, screaming, was born, Unasked. In the debris I was taught of God, His mercy and His rod, Unasked. But in the sun-shot world, With my God glorious all round I learnt, too, of such things As life and what Darwin found.

I

32


Then I was shown How a man can believe And yet himself deceive, Unasked. In winter grey I was waiting alone For Godot on some throne, Unasking. BEN AINSWORTH.

By courtesy of Oxford Opinion.

33.


\11

SOCIETY SCANDAL

THE JOHNSON SOCIETY President: P. J. Revill.

Secretary: P. N. Jeffrey.

After the successful Annual Dinner of the Hilary term, at which Lord David , Cecil was the guest of honour, the summer started with the society turning its critical faculties to Flopsy, Mopsy, Cottontail and other 'Pottery and ended with an examination of the scope and limitations of archaeology. A smaller company convened in Michaelmas term and, with Mr. Warman presiding, considered juvenile literature, heard the confessions of an English scholar, and laughed at the witticisms of W. S. Gilbert. The Johnson has continued in traditional manner, and if the lighter subjects it has discussed slightly outweigh the more serious matters, this is perhaps only fitting when in the company of the man whose name it bears "the heartiest merriment was often enjoyed". P.N.J.

THE BEAUMONT SOCIETY President: F. Moys. Secretary: B. Birch. Throughout the year the Society has successfully pursued its twin aims— that of discussing literature, preferably of an esoteric nature, and that of drinking. The papers presented have been pleasantly varied, treating Joyce Rimbaud, Theocritus, Graham Greene, Angus Wilson and "The Beat Generation", while the port, madeira and liqueurs have been uniformly good. For extra variety two meetings were devoted to prose and poetry readings, and, as usual, the Society enjoyed an excellent annual dinner. The influx of members in recent weeks is most encouraging and ensures that the traditions of the Society will continue unbroken. F.M. 34


THE JOHN PYM SOCIETY President: A. H. McLarty. Secretary: D. R. P. Mackilligin. It may be in the future there will be some surprise that the John Pym Society, which purports to be the Politics and Economics Society in the College, shows no signs of a great Liberal enthusiasm. We shall explain it away in advance by pointing out, as was done in last year's "Bullfrog" that the drinking of port is the chief function of a college Society, whatever be the excuse to cover it, and having reached our ninth meeting we are still a lot of port behind some of the older port drinking institutions. And besides it was pointed out ages ago at a level we can understand, that every child born into this world alive is either Liberal or Conservative. We note that this is nearly true again, and pass the bottle. With the port we have enjoyed excellent speakers. Mr. N. Foulkes came to inform us on Arts graduates in Industry, the Rector of Exeter gave of his wit and learning at our dinner, Mr. E. Haslon informed us about Banks especially the Bank of England, Mr. R. F. V. Heuston spoke on the Rule of Law — not as Dean of the College — Prof. Harry Johnson honoured us with a visit from Manchester, Dr. Madden told us of the Commonwealth, Mr. Lingeman came from London to speak on "Britain in Europe", and Col. Dodds-Parker crossed views with Dr. Pelcynski to our great advantage. And so we are almost persuaded that the Society is worth it on two counts. A.H.M. THE NUFFIELD SOCIETY President: P. Kidner. Secretary: G. W. Clayfield. Since the last appearance of "The Bullfrog" the Nuffield Society has drunk thirty gallons of beer and held four meetings. The first of these took the form of a visit to Morrell's Brewery, when five experienced drinking members and the previous Secretary observed the production of the sacred liquid and sampled the product. The second meeting of Hilary Term consisted of a talk by Mr. Roy Davis on "Models and Behaviour", an interesting account of the use of models in studying animal behaviour. The Society spent a quiet Trinity Term, conserving its energy and beer for the following term, which Mr. Kidner began with a discussion concerning "The Theory and Practice of Contraception". This attracted gentlemen from other faculties who were duly enlightened. Mr. Humphries delivered a talk on "Drug Addiction" at the end of term. During one of the Hilary Term meetings Mr. O'Brien will address the Society on some appropriate topic. Gentlemen reading the sciences are reminded that they will be considered members unless they inform the Secretary of their desire not to avail themselves of this privilege. Thanks are due to Mr. Clark, Treasurer, for the use and abuse of his room. G.W.C. THE COLLINGWOOD SOCIETY President: Stephen Yeo. Secretary: Mark Williams. The Society has met four times since last reported, and very successfully on each occasion. The year began with Mr. J. D. Hitchin's treatment of the Legend of the Grand Inquisitor in the Brothers Karamazov, a paper Catholic in approach and catholic in range. This was followed by a lightning survey of Socialist attitudes to the Great War under the general title of "Pacifism" by Mr. P. Richardson, now at Nuffield. Last term we were pleased to be able to hear Mr. P. F. Strawson Teading a paper on "Aesthetic Appraisal and Works of Art", and also, though in a different way, we listened to Mr.' G. Goyder's views on "Theology — it's relevance and nature". Both these speakers are to be thanked for their pains. Plans for the future are uncertain, although Mr. Gosling of this college has been and Miss Iris Murdoch will be approached this term. S.Y. 35


THE SIR THOMAS BROWNE SOCIETY No sooner had the society been refounded in the Michaelmas term than it fell upon 'Misadventure'. From certain mutterings heard in the College we gather that some people construe this differently from others. The policy was to choose a convenient play, unambitious, so that the Society might make some, if a moderate, recovery from last year's oblivion. What better than a play written by a member of the College? `Misadventure', produced by its author John Higgins, put Pembroke on the OUDS One Act list again and gave some freshmen an opportunity in university theatre. Clive Jenkins seized this with both hands and was praised by the adjudicator as very promising. But his playing of an eccentric recluse gained confidence from those opposite him — Derek Oakeley as his only friend, and Paul Russell a chess playing taxi-driver. Peter Latham provided a solid policeman. They nearly combined oddness of circumstance to go down well on the Oxford stage, but could not find quite enough power in the denouement to finish it satisfactorily. The Society has enjoyed itself with play-reading during the term, 'live' and on records, and has plans for more, with unusual variations in the A.H.M. summer term. THE CAMDEN SOCIETY President: M. E. Wandless. Secretary: R. E. Linington. Since the last issue of the "Bullfrog" the Society has met five times and has (during Michaelmas Term) elected four new members. The Annual Dinner was held in the Weatherly Room on 7th May, 1959, whereafter the Society derived much curious information from a paper delivered by Mr. J. Prest, Junior Dean of Balliol College. His paper, the result of original research, was entitled "The Silk-ribbon trade in Coventry during the mid-nineteenth century". A fortnight later the Secretary delivered his paper on "Methods and Techniques of Archaeology". Members were carried back to that remote but momentous era when Palaeolithic man was keeping up with the Joneses (and unwittingly turning himself into Megalithic Man) by moving from squalid caves to squalid huts. Mr. W. G. Hoskins of All Souls was the Society's first guest during Michaelmas, and gave a stimulating and informative account of "Elizabethan Merchant Houses". In the history of housing Mr. Hoskins' authority is very great among the few scholars who have devoted themselves to the subject. Personal anecdotes and an account of the sanitary arrangements of the Tudor bourgeoisie provided light relief. A similar degree of scholarly authority was combined with topicality when, on 20th November, the Master addressed the Society on "General Elections". The term's programme was ended by an account of the life of Cardinal. Repyngdon by the Treasurer. This distinguished fifteenth century ecclesiastic has hitherto received less than his due attention in Pembroke in view of the fact that he is the first recorded student of Broadgates Hall. G.C.B. THE MUSIC SOCIETY President: R. C. Adams. Secretary: J. C. Ponsford. The meetings of the Society usually take the form of an illustrated talk on some, generally unfamiliar, aspect of music, or of a concert. The works performed, although reasonably small-scale, have covered a wide range of periods and styles. Most of the performers have been members of the college and, whilst we are grateful to them for their efforts, we 36


would like to hear from any freshmen-instrumentalists at present lying (musically) dormant who are willing to take part in our concerts. Recently we heard two illustrated talks : "The Chamber Music of Schubert" and "The Music of Janacek". The latter was given by Roger Adams and seems, on reflection, to have been delivered largely in Czech, but despite this, the speaker's obvious enthusiasm for the subject proved to be contagious. In Trinity Term Lucy Townrow and Ashley Lawrence of the Royal Academy of Music gave a violin and piano recital which was greatly appreciated. During the Michaelmas Term concerts, Joe Wearing played a Chopin scherzo with great verve, Paul Pignon played Hindemith's clarinet sonata and a new madrigal group formed by Lionel Pike and Tom Duncan gave its first concert. Nigel Wickens has given- several fine recitals of English songs and Lieder. J.C.P. ERINYEANS President: P. G. Williams. Treasurer: B. Winkett Q: By the way, who are the Erinyeans? A: The Pembroke/St. Hugh's Debating Society'. Q : I'd never have guessed. What does `Erinyeans' mean? A : 'The Furies' — Greek mythology, you know. Q: Do you have debates or revels? A : We call them debates — on alternate Wednesdays. Q: I hope you don't talk politics all the time. A : No, we have covered Religion, Social Problems (`this house prefers water to wine, and dames to Daimlers'), scientific Education, and, once, Nationalisation. We do sometimes talk straight -politics, but, to quote one motion, 'This house does not believe that life is real and life is earnest'. Q : Your debates sound very formal. I'm not sure I'd be good enough. A : In fact the atmosphere is very relaxed. We do follow debating procedure, but we're not bound by it. Q : Suppose I want to get on the committee? A : No reason why you shouldn't — talent is spotted and rewarded. Q: Do many of St. Hugh's turn up? A : A good number do, even to debates in Pembroke. Q: Well, how much? Oh, just a minute — do you still tear people apart? A: We're the Furies, not the Bacchae — but even the Furies reformed in the end. You'll leave the debate alive. Q : (doubtfully). If you say so . . . I'll try anything once, let's have a card. P.G.W.

37


l v

Re ports from the Hearties

BOAT CLUB Captain: A. V. Hughes. Secretary: D. P. R. Mackilligin. The fortunes of Boat clubs in small colleges, at least in this particular small college, seem to fluctuate fairly regularly. The year before had been a very successful one — last year the pendulum swung back the other way, partly due to the perennial lack of numbers and so of competition for places, but mainly to inexperience; neither of the first boats achieved the "togetherness" and killer spirit essential for winning crews. In Torpids the First VII went down three places and the 2nd VIII four. The injection of three old colours into the VIII at the beginning of summer training raised hopes, but we were dogged by illness, which eventually prevented the Captain from rowing. The crew never quite managed to realise its collective potential handicapped by a lack of confidence in its ability to win, and a tendency to fall apart under pressure. But we rowed over the first two nights, nearly getting to within striking distance of B.N.C. on the second. The third day saw us in a crucial position behind Hertford, a very poor crew, but in front of St. John's, who were of First Division calibre and intent on getting there. They bumped just as we got to within a quarter of a length of Hertford, and on the last night we succumbed to Univ. The Second VIII meanwhile had gone down the first three days, but rowed over in glorious isolation on the fourth. Their great spirit could not make up for severe lack of weight — cox was in point of fact the heaviest man in the boat, though the Secretary had diverted attention from this unusual state of affairs by distributing some of his weight among the other members of the crew! The Rugger VIII was also bumped three times (not very surprising, since it was apparently stroked by a Turk) but the Schools VIII, paddled briskly by Barrett, went up four places, on no occasion having to row more than twenty strokes. Prestige and morale were regained by a IV from the First VIII which raced fairly successfully in several Regattas at the end of the term. We reached the final in our class at Oxford, beat the Royal Agricultural College, St. Thomas' Hospital and the National Provincial Bank by convincing margins at Reading to win the Maiden Erlegh Cup for Junior Senior Fours, and were unlucky to be disqualified in our first race at 38


Marlow for just touching Mortlake R.C. as we overtook them. The same IV, with one change, represented the College in Michaelmas term. We beat Trinity II very easily, and in the second round rowed a fast and exciting race with Teddy Hall II which they just won by two seconds from front station. The Torpid now training is inexperienced but- enthusiastic and promising; there are plans to enter the potential Summer VIII for the Reading Head of the River long distance race at the end of the term, and Henley, this year is more than a possibility. D.P.R.M. RUGBY FOOTBALL CLUB Captain: G. Price. Secretary: J. M. Wright. After our noble but inevitable defeat by St. Peter's Hall in the first round of Cuppers, and a surprising run in the Oxfordshire Seven-a-Side Competition, in which we outstripped the other Oxford colleges only to be overhauled by Cheltenham, season 59/60 promised to produce great things. And indeed, as if in answer to the maiden's prayer, there appeared a large number of hulking, husky Freshmen, whose like the Club has not seen for at least three years. Unfortunately, 90% of them turned out to be forwards, and we found ourselves in the awkward position of being able to field almost four packs of forwards, but only one back division. The 2nd XV however, was completely undeterred. The effervescent Mike Herbert, on being appointed Captain, proceeded to field a first-rate pack, whose enthusiasm was boundless, and a back division which usually consisted of 1st XV forwards of the more rugged type. This combination proved highly successful. The 2nd XV had its best season for many years, and included amongst its victories, two notable ones over Keble and Queen's. The 1st XV's record was almost exactly the same as last year's. In the League we only met our masters in Corpus, but a silly defeat by New College once again deprived us of promotion. In friendly games, only two out of nine were won. The blame must largely fall on the persistent refusal of regular 1st XV members to turn out for Saturday fixtures, but an unprecedented number of injuries — there were 8 men with broken limbS, at one stage — also played its part The pack was perhaps heavier than last season's and bigger; but it still lacked a real line-out expert, and achieved its greatest success in the loose where David Heath and Ben Ainsworth were always to the fore. Gerry Moore always rose to the occasion and together with Neil Garland, was our most dangerous forward in attack. Stuart Price failed to plant any tiny seeds of love in his opponent's hearts, and always assured us of at least one free fight. Gareth showed his backs an admirable example of hard-running and hard-tackling, and it was largely thanks to his kicking boots that we did win four League matches; for the backs as a whole, refused to follow other teams and throw the ball about, but preferred the break through the middle. Their inability to score tries was the result. The spirit of the Club is higher than for years. Its numbers are greater, its prospects bright. We hope to continue on the upward trend next season. J.M.W. THE BRIDGE CLUB Captain and Secretary: Canis Palarum Having narrowly avoided defeat in all the early rounds of Cuppers last year, we were eventually defeated by Oriel college in the final, A team will enter the fray again this year in spite of the fact that threequarters - of the college bridge players have now gone down or taken up chess. D.J, 39


THE CRICKET CLUB Captain: G. M. Taylor. Secretary: G. Jarrett. Skippered by Geoff Taylor, the Pembroke Eleven had a fairly good though not brilliant season. Under pressure of Schools, Geoff had for him an indifferent season, and the appearances of Phil Revill, David Boyd and Roger Alder, among others, were restricted for the same reason. The worst aspect of the cricket was the fielding, which was decidedly patchy, and the batting was variable, particularly when Bob Ing was out of action, for it was on him that the onus of run getting rested. Unfortunately, Bob fractured the base of his left thumb stopping a hard drive and was unable to bat for four weeks. Despite this mishap, some of Bob's innings were classic in design and execution, and, with his fine fast medium bowling and long accurate throwing, Bob must be one of the best allrounders in college cricket. Geoff, Martyn Berry and Phil, when available, often provided a reasonable start, and lower down in the order Pete Brown, David Bartlett and Bob Smith played some useful innings. The wicket-keeper's position was occupied very steadily by Pete Brown, or, when he could not turn up, by one of the trio of valiant reserve keepers — David Bartlett, Gareth Price and Martyn Berry. Of the bowlers, Fred Cartwright was sorely troubled by bad knees, and only seldom could he bowl with all stops out. Bob Ing could be relied on to keep an end going for hours at a stretch, and Bob Smith bowled left-arm at brisk pace. The slow bowling was more or less completely in the hands of Glyn, who got through a lot of work in often unrewarding conditions. He had a Senior Trial at the beginning of the season, and his well-deserved 'Tics cap and sweater brightened up the side's appearance. Throughout the season we were grateful to David Hopkins, David Wright and Tim Gillin, who scored and umpired for us most ably — and impartially! M.P.B. HOCKEY CLUB Captain i R. Alder. Secretary: M. C. C. Skinner. The end of last Hilary Term marked the end of a fairly successful season under the captaincy of Philip Revill. Fortunately, Philip was able to play for us several times in the Michaelmas Term, but we lost our stalwart back, Bob White-Cooper, veteran of many seasons. In the Michaelmas Term, with Roger Alder as captain, much of last year's team remained, and about six freshmen played fairly regularly for the' First XI. For most of the season, John Ellis was rock steady at centrehalf, and we came to rely a great deal — perhaps, indeed, too much — on his stickwork in defence. Roger Alder kept the Pembroke flag flying in higher levels of University hockey, playing a number of games for the Occasionals, as did John Ellis. We wish them luck in this sphere of hockey this Hilary term. In the Cuppers match against Jesus, we started with two splendid goals in the first five minutes. Unfortunately thinking the match ours, we rested on our laurels; to such an extent that we finally lost, 9-3. A feature of the term has been the resuscitation of the Second XI, through the support of certain rugger "hearties" who, in conjunction with bona fide hockey men, have enjoyed several light-hearted matches, mainly against athletic but apparently charming undergraduettes. Although this has not been our most successful season, we have enjoyed our hockey. The spirit of the team may be summed up in the words of a female supporter who, after watching a rather muddy game, turned to her bedraggled swain and said, "My dear, I'm sure you're more enthusiastic than skilful. Team : D. V. Oakley, P. J. A. Ivens, M. C. C. Skinner, P. J. Revill, J. R. Ellis, D. E. Jago, S. T. Badger, R. W. Alder (Capt.), D. J. Jardine, P. L. Coulson, G. H. James, A. S. Denyer, J. M. Graham, D. Shayer. M.C.C.S. 40


THE SQUASH CLUB Captain: J. M. Mason. Secretary: D. W. Eking. Inspired by the example of the Secretary who didn't play, and of the Captain who played . . . and lost, the 1st V lost all its first six matches. Tony Denyer raised our hopes by winning the decisive fifth match against Hertford in the League. But our dreams of staying in division two were shortly shattered by the "Oriel Affair". Both Secretaries thought the match was "At Home" and the teams duly arrived at opposite ends of Oxford on the appointed day. After this hiatus and much ill-tempered correspondence WE played "At Home". The Oriel team (like most of our opponents) arrived incredibly late, looking lost, muddy and irritable, and (again like most of our opponents) beat us 5-0. We — that is, 3 Pembroke men assisted by the Balliol Secretary and a friend from Keble — lost 2-3 to Bristol University. Everybody — 5 Pembroke men this time — lost at Cambridge against Selwyn: The Royal Agricultural College, Cirencester, perhaps fortunately, never came. We even tried our hand at badminton, but still we lost. Despite a narrow win over St. John's, we, finish second from the bottom of division two and must now repel a challenge from Trinity if we are to stay in the division. Alistair McGregor alone wins more often than he loses, while Christopher Fitzhugh and Alistair Cameron believe too often in following their Captain's example. Tony Denyer reads Forestry and plays hockey on "Match" afternoons, but even then finds occasional time to win. The 2nd V has only lost once since the first week of term, and then only 2-3. Graham Hart, the anchor at No. 3, almost always wins; John Walker and Tony Yabl on normally win at Nos. 1 and 2 (when not playing for the 1st V) and an assortment of remarkably efficient hockey, badminton and genuine squash players share the last two places and can be relied on to win whenever D.W.E. any of the first three slip up. "THE INCOMPETENTS" Commander: R. D. Thompson. Adjutant: J. M. Wright. During the Summer Sundays of 1959, incompetence was as usual rife. Regrettably, however, it was to be seen off, rather than on the cricket field. Such glorious episodes as the ferrying of an entire team to Great Haseley in one Ancient Austin, the journey of only nine stalwarts to face the schoolmasters of Abingdon, and the demolition of a stone-dyke at Swinbrook by an Adjutant in full cry for his tea, glow dim beneath the dismal record of last season. Of six games, no less than two were won. And, as if that is not bad enough, another near-disaster was avoided at Swinbrookonly by a most judicious display of batting that converted 2 for 55 into 85 all out, and succeeded in losing the game. We recall with horror that the Bloater struck at Great Haseley, that the new American menace Al Sinel bewildered the gentlemen of John Glenny's XI with his underhand baseball bowl, and that not only did Fred Moys make 35 at Swinbrook, but Messrs. Gillin & Cartwright put on 68 for the fourth wicket at Clifton Hampden. Figures are wearisome, but speak for themselves, "hinc illae lacrimae". The Commander, it is true, showed an excellent example by scorning the batsmen, and bowling to the cows at Cuxham, but few were ready to follow his lead, except, perhaps, off the field, where the hospitality extended by the Oxfordshire villages was warmly appreciated by all. Peter Brown's ambulance did noble work by introducing us to the wenches of Watlington. Albert Hall umpired as erratically as ever. Most of "The Boys" turned out on the field, at some stage or other. In fact, "the Incompetents" were really much the same as ever — offering solace J.M.W. to the schools-weary and opportunity to the thirsty. 41


ASSOCIATION FOOTBALL CLUB Captain: P. D. Toomey. Hon. Secretary: R. J. Ing. A successful start was made to our Cuppers quest, easy victories being recorded over Christ Church and Hertford, before we met a strong St. Peter's Hall side in the quarter-final. The first meeting resulted in a 1-1 draw, a fine performance that would have been capped with victory had the Secretary-elect not decided to follow what is fast becoming a tradition in missing a penalty in the 89+ minute! The replay was less keenly fought, probably because a few members of the team were suffering from 'flu: and our interest in the competition terminated with a 1-2 defeat. Right to the end we were dogged by bad luck, for once again the match was nearly saved in the last minute by a superlative effort by that G.O.M. of College football, ,C. Beswick (Esq.), which left spectators gasping almost as heavily as he was. After the serious business of-.cup-ties, the remaining fixtures were played. it seemed, mostly to afford exponents of other sports a chance of trying their hand at soccer. But a trip to Paris made a fitting final to the season. For the record we lost our match against Rambouillet, 2-3; the tour was, notwithstanding, a great success! "Dom Fred's" linguistic ability proved a great asset when we discovered that the skipper of the other team was on the run from Franco. Graham Smith, learning one Gallic phrase of endearment on the first day, proceeded to engage people of all nationalities in lengthy conversation with his extensive vocabulary. This season opened with more team changes than had been usual in the past. The captain, Geoff Taylor, had gone, as had Graham Smith, Steve Culhane, and almost unbelievably, Dave Hopkins. To this distinguished list was soon to be added our long service left-half; having aided us to a sound victory over Teddy Hall, he was forthwith declared ineligible by the League Committee. In spite of these losses, the acquisition of two able freshmen, Ted 'Bentley and Len Coles, seemed to enhance our prospects of heading the league for the third successive season. But at a crucial time we were beset by a series of injuries which sometimes made it difficult even to field eleven tolerably fit men. In the circumstances we were not too disappointed to finish in fourth position. As most of our players are now fit to do service again, we may reasonably hope for a better run in Cuppers than we had last year. In this case, Bullfrog should have appeared, just in time for me to exhort you all to tome and support t1 in the Final. R.J.I.

LAWN TENNIS CLUB Captain: Gareth Price. Secretary: Peter Ledger. A season in which we won just under half our 1st VI matches; though both in victory and defeat we played and enjoyed many close games. The freshmen gave great encouragement both in numbers and ability, with Jack Stromberg and Graham Hart perhaps the best of them. David Bartlett also emerged from the background, but in general our form was far from stable, with everyone playing very well or very badly at different times. Two enjoyable matches were played against Selwyn College, Cambridge; we were soundly beaten away from home, but in the return match we produced out best tennis of the season. 'The Second VI played well and won most of their games. The courts were widely used by the College as a whole and stood up to the hard wear surprisingly will. Two new grass courts have been laid and should he available for light use next season. With this need satisfied we must start to work towards the attainment of a hard court. It has been suggested that the Tennis Club might set an example in the coming season by holding a dinner or dinner/dance for its members. G.P. 42


THE GOLF CLUB Without making any claims to fame or even ability, it was decided that the College should take the field in the Golf Cuppers again. Threequarters of the team of 4 were from the Commonwealth and appeared to be in the team purely by graft. The draw decreed a battle with the men of Jesus. Attempts to be discreet about it were ruined by a gale of laughter on the first tee following Bill McKinnon's soaring wallop, which landed fully fifty yards away on the ground usually reserved for ladies. Fortunately the first two were already safely away. David Bright had in fact rushed away tacking widely against the head-wind and muttering something about having dinner in Taunton. And Angus McLarty had gone off soberly with a couple of strategically placed mishits. David Bright came in six down, and rushed to Taunton where he was safe from the threats offered to his life and limb by the other two, who together totalled five up on their opponents. This gave Pembroke a sporting chance with the only local boy, Dick Hayes, representing them two days later. Unfortunately his noble effort failed. and the team was confined once again to activity at the 19th hole — which has been the case for some time after the first round of Cuppers. But this is not to say golf is not enjoyed in the College. A proposed competition in the summer term drew a large entry, even though 'it never got past the proposed stage. A.H.M. Captain:

ATHLETICS CLUB J. Carden. Secretary: C. A. Clark.

The Club again reached the finals of Cuppers last Hilary Term 1958 having beaten Merton by the small margin of 4 points in the semi-finals. In the final we were against Teddy Hall and despite excellent performance' by all members of the team we were beaten by 16 points — w2. would like to thank members of other clubs from the college who helped us on this and other occasions. , In the Trinity term Mike Riegels, Rex van Russum, and Jack Stromberg were chosen to represent the University in the Varsity match and Mike Riegels comfortably won the quarter mile event. John Carden also represented the University in other matches during the summer. As a fitting end to a successful year Rex van Rossum and John Winch were chosen to represent Great Britain in international matches. We congratulate them on their fine achievement and wish them every success in the 'Olympic season' now upon us. Michaelmas term brought a disappointingly small number of Freshmen to the club but the college retained their position in the first division in Relay Cuppers and Field Events Cuppers and we hope to do well in this term's competition. C.A.C. THE CHESS CLUB Joe Fernyhough

Captain and Secretary:

There seems to have been increased interest in college chess this yeat:; probably due to the willingness of most of last year's players to continue — Mods. and Schools claimed the rest — a number of keen freshmen and the influence of the J.C.R. set. Consequently, the Club had a fairly successful Michaelmas term. Three teams were entered in the University Chess League -- two in the second division and one in the third. The performance of the second team was unusually good — both matches were won and only point conceded. The termly results are: Matches played 6, won 4, drawn 2, Lost 0; Points for 18; Points against: 6. In Hilary term there will be a College Knock-Out Competition and it is hoped that the J.C.R. faithfuls, and freshmen in particular, will support it. If they do, the College may be able to run extra teams. J.F. 43


THE POKER CLUB Our fortunes are reviving; with the help of enthusiastic, if inexperienced newcomers we soon moulded an effective team, which convincingly defeated St. Cath's. and Univ. in the early weeks of the Term. Despite an early injury to the index finger and thumb of his dealing hand, Fred Moys gallantly played in all our matches, although opponents frequently exploited his handicap. First team colours were hastily awarded to Alan Fell, our most successful recruit. As the unfortunate result of two disastrous games in the last week, he can no longer fulfil his promise to take us to future away matches in his new car. While David James injected a welcome strain of skill and intelligence into many of our matches, Bill Richards persisted in using Trans-Atlantic tactics which deceived only himself. Happily Tom Stanford and Tony Couch found our company more exhilarating than that of their other friends, the jolly farmers, and eagerly tried to add more matches to an already overcrowded fixture-list. Mike Herbert, by far the fittest member of the side, rarely tested his amazing stamina to the full, preferring a cautious defensive game to the more dashing one expected by many of his colleagues. The surprise of the season was probably Graham Humphries; forced out of temporary retirement, he returned with new-found brilliance, and, rather by luck than intended deception, soon established himself as our leading chip-scorer. Although the Club has enjoyed a profitable season, we still need new members to replace those who will soon be competing for honours in other more exacting schools. M.H.

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