Pacific Sun Weekly 10.14.2011 - Section 1 by Pacific Sun

Public Notices Continued from Page 42 Name(s): BONG NGUYEN, 655 ROSAL WAY, SAN RAFAEL, CA 94903. This statement was filed with the County Clerk Recorder of Marin County on September 21, 2011. (Pacific Sun: September 30; October 7, 14, 21, 2011) NOTICE OF PETITION TO ADMINISTER ESTATE OF: JOAN BAUMHOFF. Case No. PR-1104792. To all heirs, beneficiaries, creditors, contingent creditors and persons who may otherwise be interested in the will or estate, or both, of JOAN BAUMHOFF, JOAN A. BAUMHOFF. A PETITION FOR PROBATE has been filed by: ANNE SCOTT in the Superior Court of California, County of MARIN. THE PETITION FOR PROBATE requests that ANNE SCOTT be appointed as personal representative to administer the estate of the decedent. THE PETITION requests the decedent’s will and codicils, if any, be admitted to probate. The will and any codicils are available for examination in the file kept by the court. THE PETITION requests authority to administer the estate under the Independent Administration of Estates Act. (This authority will allow the personal representative to take many actions without obtaining court approval. Before taking certain very important actions, however, the personal representative will be required to give notice to interested persons unless they have waived notice or consented to the proposed action.) The independent administration authority will be granted unless an interested person files an objection to the petition and shows good cause why the court should not grant the authority. A HEARING on the petition will be held in this court as follows: October 31, 2011 at 8:30 a.m. in Dept: H, Room: H, of the Superior Court of California, Marin County, located at Superior Court of California, County of Marin, 3501 Civic Center Drive, San Rafael, CA 94913. IF YOU OBJECT to the granting of the petition, you should appear at the hear-

ing and state your objections or file written objections with the court before the hearing. Your appearance may be in person or by your attorney. IF YOU ARE A CREDITOR or a contingent creditor of the decedent, you must file your claim with the court and mail a copy to the personal representative appointed by the court within four months from the date of first issuance of letters as provided in section 9100 of the California Probate Code. The time for filing claims will not expire before four months from the hearing date noticed above. YOU MAY EXAMINE the file kept by the court. If you are a person interested in the estate, you may file with the court a Request for Special Notice (form DE-154) of the filing of an inventory and appraisal of estate assets or of any petition or account as provided in Probate Code section 1250. A Request for Special Notice form is available from the court clerk. Petitioner: ANNE SCOTT, 635 ORANGE AVE., LOS ALTOS, CA 94022. (650)917-1795. (Publication Dates: October 7, 14, 21, 2011) ORDER TO SHOW CAUSE FOR CHANGE OF NAME SUPERIOR COURT OF THE STATE OF CALIFORNIA FOR THE COUNTY OF MARIN. No. CIV 1104619. TO ALL INTERESTED PERSONS: Petitioner MAIA J. NEWMAN filed a petition with this court for a decree changing names as follows: DAELEN SHINOBI HAYOS to DAELEN HAYOS NEWMAN. THE COURT ORDERS that all persons interested in this matter shall appear before this court at the hearing indicated below to show cause, if any, why the petition for change of name should not be granted. Any person objecting to the name changes described above must file a written objection that includes the reasons for the objection at least two court days before the matter is scheduled to be heard and must appear at the hearing to show cause why the petition should not be granted. If no written objection is timely filed, the court may grant the petition without a hearing. NOTICE OF HEARING: November 18, 2011, 9:00AM, Dept. L, Room L, Superior

Court of California, County of Marin, 3501 Civic Center Drive, San Rafael, CA 94903. A copy of this ORDER TO SHOW CAUSE shall be published at least once each week for four successive weeks prior to the date set for hearing on the petition in the following newspaper of general circulation, printed in the county of Marin: PACIFIC SUN. Date: September 16, 2011 /s/ LYNN DURYEE, JUDGE OF THE SUPERIOR COURT (Pacific Sun: October 14, 21, 28; November 4, 2011) ORDER TO SHOW CAUSE FOR CHANGE OF NAME SUPERIOR COURT OF THE STATE OF CALIFORNIA FOR THE COUNTY OF MARIN. No. CIV 1104838. TO ALL INTERESTED PERSONS: Petitioner JANE RATANAPOL filed a petition with this court for a decree changing names as follows: NIRAND OLYN SCOTT to KARLYN CHASE REED. THE COURT ORDERS that all persons interested in this matter shall appear before this court at the hearing indicated below to show cause, if any, why the petition for change of name should not be granted. Any person objecting to the name changes described above must file a written objection that includes the reasons for the objection at least two court days before the matter is scheduled to be heard and must appear at the hearing to show cause why the petition should not be granted. If no written objection is timely filed, the court may grant the petition without a hearing. NOTICE OF HEARING: November 28, 2011, 8:30AM, Dept. E, Room E, Superior Court of California, County of Marin, 3501 Civic Center Drive, San Rafael, CA 94903. A copy of this ORDER TO SHOW CAUSE shall be published at least once each week for four successive weeks prior to the date set for hearing on the petition in the following newspaper of general circulation, printed in the county of Marin: PACIFIC SUN. Date: September 29, 2011 /s/ FAYE D’OPAL, JUDGE OF THE SUPERIOR COURT (Pacific Sun: October 14, 21, 28; November 4, 2011)

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›› ADViCE GODDESS® by Amy Alko n

I feel like a disappointment to my boyfriend of seven months. I’m 28; he’s 35 and Mr. Smart. He is a Brit and was a top student at Cambridge. He says everyone expected him to become prime minister, but he decided to buck their expectations and become a portrait painter. Although he earns a good living, I believe he considers himself a failure compared with the wealthy Brits commissioning his paintings. He says I’d be “more attractive” to him if I wrote for a media blog, as it would help his filmmaking career aspirations. Well, I quit my unsatisfying graphic design job, and I am halfway through getting my master’s in psychology and have no time or desire to blog. He’ll tell me I’m talented/beautiful/smart but add a dig like “It’s surprising you aren’t more accomplished by now” and say stuff like “You’re not very attractive when you’re anxious.” When I tell him this is hurtful, he apologizes and says he just wants to help me better myself. I want to be the strong, confident woman he says is most attractive. I felt that way when we were first dating, but perhaps my insecurity took over. How do I toughen up and develop a thicker skin?—Eroded

Love is patient, love is kind, love is surprised you aren’t more accomplished and thinks you’re kinda uggo when you’re anxious. And OK, love isn’t prime minister, just some hired brush, but maybe love could paint a couple extra chins on the Duke of Oldemoneyham or Lady Footlocker instead of taking all that bitterness and self-loathing out on you. Apparently, the next best thing to running a country is finding a girlfriend, appointing yourself her sadistic guidance counselor and running her spirit down till she feels like a chalk outline of the woman she used to be. (All the better to prime her to further your career at the expense of her own.) This isn’t love; it’s insidious emotional abuse—a man doing everything to undermine his girlfriend’s confidence, only to turn around and remind her that confidence is sexy. A younger woman who’s unsure of herself who pairs up with an older, accomplished man is most prone to get into this sick compliment-dig-apology loop you’re in. You idealized this guy and the relationship to the point where you’ve become desperate for his approval so you can crawl back up from where he’s put you down. If you had a stronger self and a realistic view of him, you’d see his putdowns for what they are—stealth abuse passed off as loving criticism: “Here, let me help you out of a little more of your self-worth.” Instead of wondering how you might grow body armor, ask yourself those basic questions so many in relationships forget to keep asking: Does this person make me happy? Is my life better because I’m with him? You can go back to being that strong, confident woman you once were—once you no longer have an emotional predator for a boyfriend. After you ditch him, take some time to ponder my favorite definition of love, by sci-fi writer Robert Heinlein: “Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” A guy who loves you Heinlein-style will “help you better yourself,” but by cheering you on for having the guts to change careers and by telling you you’re beautiful and sexy—without following up by whispering a bunch of sweet “you’re nothings” in your ear.

How important is it that personal style and sensibilities match in a relationship? I’m 24 and having trouble agreeing to a ﬁrst date with a man if he texts or emails me an emoticon. I majored in literature, love language and see the emoticon as the epitome of intellectual laziness and bad expression of self.—:(

“O Romeo, Romeo...eeuw, Romeo... you’re wearing dad jeans and a T-shirt with a wolf on it, and not in an ironic way.” As a younger woman, you’re more likely to dump guys over little things, like style crimes. But after a few years of dating, and a few rounds with some Slick Ricks, minor sensibility mismatches should pale in comparison with serial cheating and undeclared STDs. (You can steer a guy into cooler shirts. It’s harder to get a guy to throw on some ethics.) That said, as a lit hound, you aren’t “shallow” in looking critically at a guy’s emoticon use, just unwise in cutting him off before the ﬁrst date because of it—assuming the rest of his email doesn’t reveal scorching illiteracy and poor self-expression. Maybe this is his one area of intellectual laziness. We all have some—for example, the intellectually lazy assumption that somebody’s intellectually lazy just because he sometimes “winks” with punctuation marks. ✹

Worship the goddess—or sacriﬁce her at the altar on TownSquare at ›› paciﬁcsun.com OCTOBER 14– OCTOBER 20, 2011 PACIFIC SUN 43