THE NARCISSIST MANIFESTO Think of your friendly neighborhood narcissist: status-seeking, grandiose, loud-mouthed, brash and flamboyant. Have you ever noticed how he brags all the time, not only about his astronomical IQ and bulging pectoral muscles, but also about the fact that he is narcissistic? It’s as if he is proud of it. Lots of psychologists have theorized that a lack of self-awareness is a hallmark trait of narcissists. My personal experience with narcissists does not seem to support this. It seems to me as though they are not only aware of who they are, but also embrace it. Luckily, I don’t have to rely on personal anecdotes.To get to the bottom of this age-old mystery, Erika Carlson and her colleagues at Washington University in St. Louis conducted three very well-done studies to see whether narcissists have insight into their personality and their reputation.The results were published this month in the prestigious Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. The researchers administered a number of different measures of narcissism to college students and looked at how high-scorers are seen by others, how they see themselves and how they believe they are seen by others.They looked across social contexts and interviewed new acquaintances as well as friends and family. Their results across the three studies are strikingly consistent. Unsurprisingly, they found that narcissists think they are hot stuff.Those scoring high in narcissism tended to rate themselves as more intelligent, physically attractive, likable and funnier than others. Interestingly, they also rated themselves as having higher levels of negative aspects of narcissism, such as being poweroriented, impulsive, arrogant and prone to exaggerate their abilities! Therefore, narcissists are aware they are narcissists. There was also a strong positive correlation between narcissism and having a reputation for narcissism: Narcissists were definitely perceived as narcissists. While other people didn’t think the narcissists were nearly as hot as the narcissists thought they were, the narcissists were well aware of their reputation. When asked how others perceive them on the positive traits, their results were closer to how they were
were particularly related to extroversion. Independent of personality, the researchers also found that friendliness of facial expression (amount of smiling) and pleasantness of voice were the best predictors of liking and meta-perceptions. Unsurprisingly, prior research has also found that smiling plays an important role in attraction. Additionally, students with baby faces were perceived as likers. Philip Novak, dean of arts, humanities and social sciences at Dominican University in San Rafael, says that popularity essentially comes down to a type of majority rule regarding the type of social behaviors that result in popularity. “If we define popular as being liked or found attractive by more people than the av-
“someone who is actually perceived confident without than their own selfmerit,” they may perceptions of the take it as a complivery same traits. ment, thinking to These results themselves,“Well, suggest that narduh I’m arrogant, cissists do indeed if by that you have self-awaremean ‘deservedly ness of themselves confident!’” As and know their the researchers reputation. This note,“Narcissists raises the question: seem to choose How can narcishonest arrogance sists maintain their when describing inflated self-image themselves and even though they their reputation.” know full well how The results of they are perceived this study as well by others? The reas prior studies searchers suggest suggest that a few intriguing narcissists do possibilities. care more about Perhaps narcisbeing perceived sists assume that as superior on others are just failagentic traits (e.g., ing to realize how industriousness, bitchin’ they reassertiveness, ally are. They may ‘Oh Lord it’s hard to be humble when you’re perfect in every dominance) think that people way, I can’t wait to look in the mirror—cause I get better compared to comare just too dim to looking each day.’ –Mac Davis recognize their brilliance. Another possibility munal traits (e.g., agreeableness and honesty). is that narcissists may think critics are just en- Narcissists don’t seem to care whether they vious of them. Narcissists may take negative are perceived as good people; they’d rather be feedback and think to themselves, “Those admired than liked. So perhaps the narcissists in their study construed supposedly negative ashaters are just jealous!” pects of narcissism (e.g., arrogance) as desirable. This may explain why narcissists behave in Of course, it’s also possible that narcissists are arrogant ways. Instead of compensating for fully aware of the meaning of narcissism and some deep-seated insecurity, bragging may be the negative impact they have on others, but their way of demanding the recognition they just don’t care as long as it doesn’t get in the truly believe they deserve. Narcissists score up way of their goals. the wazoo in entitlement. As the researchers The researchers also found that new acnote, this idea is consistent with self-verification quaintances viewed narcissists more positively theory:“Narcissists believe that they are excepthan well acquainted others.Those who just tional people and may behave in arrogant ways met the narcissists did tend to have a favorable because they are attempting to bridge the gap impression of the narcissists, whereas those between their self-perceptions and their metawho knew the narcissists much longer tended perceptions.” The researchers also suggest it’s possible that to have a much more negative impression. Again, the narcissists in their sample were narcissists maintain their self-image by misconfully aware of this! The results suggest that narstruing the meaning of narcissism.When told cissists understand that they make positive first they are arrogant, instead of thinking they are
erage person is liked or found attractive,” says Novak, “it is because certain people convey in their behavior a greater-than-average amount of those qualities that human beings always find likable or attractive.” BIRDS OF A FEATHER The researchers also looked at similarity effects. According to the prominent social psychologist Roy Baumeister, the influence of similarity on attraction is “one of the best known findings in social psychology.” Their results are consistent with earlier research in social psychology. Participants who had similar preferences regarding subcultural scenes (e.g., punk) and clothing (e.g., outlandish) were prone
to like each other and expected to be liked by each other. This worked in both directions: more normative beauty-oriented perceivers (those into “fitness and wellness”) specifically tended to like dressed-up (as opposed to outlandishly dressed) others. No similarity effects were found for other personality traits, interest similarity or selfconcept similarity. WHY ARE SELF-CENTERED PEOPLE ATTRACTIVE AT FIRST SIGHT? The finding that extroversion is related to popularity at first sight is not surprising. Neither is the finding that those with higher levels of neuroticism and lower levels of self-esteem expect to be unpopu-
impressions that deteriorate over time.These results are consistent with prior research that has shown that narcissists have trouble forming long-term relationships. Narcissists tend to think they are “too good” for most people and are always seeking “better” relationship alternatives. The results are also consistent with research showing that narcissists are masters at first impressions. As researchers have suggested, the narcissist’s success at creating initial attraction may make short-term contexts more rewarding for them than longer-term contexts:“It is possible that narcissists discontinue relationships early on because they cannot bridge the gap between their positive self-perceptions and relatively negative meta-perceptions.” PRACTICAL IMPLICATIONS It’s well known that narcissists rarely change, mostly because they don’t want to change.They love their lifestyle. Researchers trying to reform narcissists have noted that a major impediment is their lack of self-awareness.They have speculated that if narcissists received true feedback, they would change.The study by Carlson and colleagues suggests that this is not the case. Narcissists are fully aware that they are narcissistic and have a narcissistic reputation. Instead, the researchers suggest that a better intervention would be to “emphasize the interpersonal and intrapsychic costs of being seen as narcissistic by others.” Narcissists are unlikely to change unless they think changing will benefit the things they desire, such as status and power. ARE YOU A NARCISSIST? Many of you are probably reading this and wondering whether you are a narcissist. An implication of the results I just reviewed is that if you are a narcissist, you probably already know it! In reality, all of us are at least a little bit narcissistic. In the studies just reviewed, the researchers administered a narcissistic questionnaire to college students. Even though they found that the students scored all across the spectrum, it’s not as if there was anyone who was completely non-narcissistic. All of us, throughout our day, ebb and flow in and out of the narcissistic mind-set. —Scott Barry Kaufman
lar. Prior research by the same researchers (also adopting the Social Relations Lens Model) found that men with a long-term mating orientation (which is correlated with reduced levels of extroversion) and shy men (which is correlated with higher levels of neuroticism) get the short end of the stick in rapid mate-selection settings such as speed dating. Other research has shown that extroverted people fare better in a speed-dating context. The reason is pretty straightforward: At first encounter, extroverted people are more likely to reveal their personality than introverts; extroversion acts as an amplifier of human traits. As for those with high levels of neuroticism and low levels 14 > JULY 8 - JULY 14, 2011 PACIFIC SUN 13