Options Magazine-June 2014

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options June 2014

Official Guide to PrideFest 2014

ELECT

HARVEY

MILK

TRIUMPH and TRANSFORMATION WILL YOU LEAD THE NEXT MARCH? Rhode Island’s LGBTQ community magazine since 1982 — FREE



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In This Issue:

LGBTQ News, Resources & Events

4 Letters from the Editor & Publisher 5 Pride Theme 5 President’s Note 6 PrideFest Sponsors 7 Pride Honorees 8 Calendar 11 Letter to the Editor 12 News Briefs 14 Out on the Town 18 Interview with Rodney Davis 23 AIDS Care Ocean State 24 Lesbians on the Loose 26 Taking the Test

28 Pride Essentials 30 Pride Parade & Festival Map 32 More Than Just a Dream 34 PrideFest Entertainers 37 PrideFest Entertainment Lineup 38 Questioning Queer 42 Stand-Up Comedy After Sobriety 44 Finding Your LGBT Feminism 46 Frontrunners 48 Freedom to Divorce 50 Trans* Health Care Challenges 52 Youth Pride, Inc. 54 SAGE/RI 55 Resources 66 Worth a Look

Cover Art by Alex Niemeyer

Subscriptions are free! Sign up online or send your name and mailing address to info@optionsri.org. Connect with us online! Facebook, Twitter, Google+ and Issuu

Rhode Island’s lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer community news source since 1982 June 2014 Vol. XXXIII, Issue 2

Publisher Kyle McKendall kyle@optionsri.org Editor in Chief Jen Stevens editor@optionsri.org Calendar Editor Lise Schwartz info@optionsri.org Resources Editor Nathaniel Zane nate@optionsri.org Copy Editors Steve Kagan, Joseph Morra, Myra Shays, Nathaniel Zane Writers Tony Aguilar, Tom Bertrand, Annie Cronin-Silva, Christopher Dalpe, Frontrunners RI, Brian Gay, Jodi Glass, Sally Ann Hay, Ethan Kennedy, The Lit Chick, AJ Metthe, Brian Mills, Carol Ricker, Melanie Silva, Jen Stevens, Christina Thomas Photographers Jack Hartwein-Sanchez Elizabeth LaRoque Advertising Director Traci Allen advertising@optionsri.org Finance Director Donny McKendall billing@optionsri.org Subscriptions Francis Ryan frank@optionsri.org General Information info@optionsri.org

PO Box 6406 Providence, RI 02940 (401) 724-LGBT

www.optionsri.org

© OPTIONS 2014. Options is published monthly. The opinions expressed are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the governing board, volunteers or staff. Listings are provided as a resource and do not imply endorsement. Submissions to Options must include a phone number or email address. Names may be withheld on request. Submissions, ads, calendar or resource listings for the July issue must be delivered by June 23.

Options | June 2014

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From the Editor

From the Publisher

Dear Reader, On June 21, hundreds of community members will join forces to create our community’s largest celebration of the year: PrideFest. From vendors to bartenders, marchers to performers, non-profits to the volunteer clean-up crew, PrideFest is our community’s ultimate collaboration and an incredible demonstration of our power, creativity, pride, and joy. If your role at PrideFest is purely as an attendee, please consider the value of your appreciation and drop dollars in the buckets of energetic greeters; make a donation as the enormous Pride flag travels the parade route. One of the greatest benefits of working with non-profit organizations is meeting volunteers. I’m always curious to know a volunteer’s story. I’ve found that most often individuals give so much of themselves because at some point in their life, they, or perhaps a loved one, received some help and want to give back to ensure that help is available to others down the line. And many find belonging. Volunteerism is a rewarding and cherished act. If you’re still searching for your place within this community, I urge you to reach out to the many worthy organizations you read about in Options. I assure you, there is a place at the table. While delivering all the need-to-know information about PrideFest, these pages offer personal stories (contributed by a diverse range of talented community members) about current vital issues in the lives of LGBTQs such as sobriety, feminism, marriage, and identity – an issue that continues to fascinate me. Our community identity is evolving as our understanding of gender and sexuality evolves. We observe individuals proudly stepping forth, embracing and proclaiming the truth about who they are, and feel inspired to do the same. Yet many of us struggle to find the right words to express ourselves. Take me, for example. I am not heterosexual. This much I know. The bisexual label has always seemed truest, and for a long time I would correct those assuming my lesbianism. Nowadays, I’d easily answer to gay, lesbian, bisexual, queer, polyamorous, and questioning. Questioning because sometimes I consider whether pansexual is a more accurate label, and wonder if I’d be genderqueer had I spent zero time embellishing my femininity. It’s exciting to find our community at this questioning stage and suggest we keep our minds open, rather than rush to answers. Should you find yourself in doubt of your longstanding sexual or gender identity, consider the words of my wise friend, Kurt, who says he’s “just being me.” Wishing you a safe and enjoyable Pride season, Jen Stevens

Dear Reader, This year’s PrideFest theme, Triumph and Transformation, speaks forcefully to not only the changing LGBTQ community but to the successes of Options Magazine as an organization amid current states of transformation. First published in 1982, Options was a lone underground media voice, an oasis for people who felt alone, disconnected, disempowered, afraid, or confused. Six black and white pages were filled with information and resources for the community: a lifeline for many in need of safe medical attention, supportive spiritual guidance, social interaction, or a place to invest their activist energy. Options now serves the community better than ever before. We continue to maintain high editorial standards and provide you with content that other media outlets aren’t discussing. Our distribution and visibility around the state and beyond, continues to advance the community’s positive position in the public forum. Our unique and important voice, which continually builds, unites and supports the community is vital. This issue of 68 color pages is the biggest (and gayest) magazine that Rhode Island has ever seen. It represents the community’s triumphs, the benefits of non-profit collaboration, the vibrant state of corporate giving, and most importantly, our organization’s ongoing transformation. Options has seen several changes in leadership in its 32 years of publication. Each successor has worked tirelessly to build our organization for the betterment of us all. Despite financial challenges, an ever-changing media landscape, and the evolution of the community and its needs, one thing has remained constant: we’ve adapted. This Pride season all of us here at Options are celebrating our own triumphs, and are laying the tracks for our strategic transformation within the larger community. As we develop and implement our plan to grow our organization, your input and assistance is both needed and wanted by our leadership team. Be safe, be proud, and be a visible and vital part of the transformation that’s happening throughout the community.

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Onward, Kyle McKendall

Options | June 2014


39th Annual Celebration 1976-2014

From the President of Rhode Island Pride This year’s RI PrideFest theme is Triumph & Transformation. When Pride members voted so overwhelmingly for this theme, my mind flooded with possibilities for its meaning. The triumph of marriage equality! Not just in Rhode Island, but in state after state, we revisit that feeling of elation as various legislatures and governors pass it into law, as judges strike down unconstitutional bans, and as news reaches us regularly of the impending nuptials of our samegender friends. Our community has worked for decades to transform hearts and minds to make this triumph possible and it has transformed us, too. We are more open, more accepted: like the caterpillar transformed to a butterfly, we are viewed more often with admiration than with disgust.

#TriumphandTransformation Mission of Rhode Island Pride: • Create opportunities for integrating and promoting visibility for the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community. • Promote equal rights and diversity through public education and the arts. • Provide safe opportunties and venues for people to come out and express and celebrate their sexual identity and gender.

Transformation also brings to mind several friends of mine, old friends I once knew by different names and new friends I’ve only known by their current names. Stephen Alexander, our 2014 Honorary Marshal, is one of those new friends who recently stepped courageously into the public spotlight. His journey is a heartwarming story and his willingness to “come out” as America’s first openly-transgender high school sports coach transformed his community as much as he himself was transformed. It seems less shocking these days when an individual comes out as gay or lesbian. As we see more public figures and celebrities coming out, I’m reminded that a story like Stephen’s is still quite rare; it illustrates for me where our community should rally its next push for equality. The transgender members of our community should be able to fully enjoy our triumphs along with the rest of us, without fear of ridicule, without being excluded because we are unsure where they “fit in,” and without the need for them to fight to be something other than who they are. I look forward to meeting my next transgender friend and never knowing they were ever anyone but themselves. I am so excited for Rhode Island Pride this year! The celebration is shaping up to be as amazing as it has always been under the guidance of my predecessor, Rodney Davis. I look forward to seeing him and his partner Brian Mills, also a former board member, marching at the front of the parade as our Grand Marshals and being greeted by all of you with well-deserved accolades. I hope you’ve noticed something different about the Pride Guide this year: our collaboration with Options Magazine has already reaped great rewards as our organizations worked together to produce this publication. We’re already looking at new ideas for next year. I firmly believe that collaboration is the way forward for Rhode Island Pride as an organization, and for all of us as a community. We’ll accomplish great things if we continue to transform and triumph together. Yours in Pride, Kurt Bagley

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tos Options | June 2014


2014 Rhode Island Pride

Honorees

Grand Marshals Rodney Davis and Brian Mills

Brian Mills and Rodney Davis

are being recognized for their longtime leadership and contributions to the LGBT community in RI. Both Rodney and Brian have dedicated themselves to the advancement of our community through their leadership, volunteerism and activism for LGBT civil rights, marriage equality and developing programs and events for our community to come together. Most recently Rodney served as the RI Pride President and volunteered for more than 23 years. His partner Brian Mills is also a former board member and key lead in orchestrating the Triple Crown Pageant, PrideFest entertainment and the Illuminated Night Parade. Under the leadership and direction of Rodney and Brian, RI Pride has grown to be one of the premier LGBT Pride organizations in the region, organizing a diverse mix of year-round events and programs for the community to come together. The contributions from Rodney and Brian have been numerous and continue to have a lasting impact in shaping the LGBT community in Rhode Island. Both men continue to volunteer with Rhode Island Pride.

Honorary Marshal Stephen Alexander

is the first out-and-proud, multiple sport, high school and middle school transgender coach in the U.S. His many teams have given him the strength to share his story. Having played sports all his life, Stephen realizes the impact that coaches and teammates can have on one another and their community. A believer in the importance of teamwork, Stephen knows that a transition play can make a big impact–whether it is in a game or in life. So he is using his story to address equal opportunities for all people.

Options | June 2014

Stephen enjoys exploring the world, meeting interesting people, playing on sports teams, music, ballroom dancing, trying wacky foods, doing yard work, and watching his pets be funny. Most importantly, he loves spending time with family, friends and is helping to raise “the next generation of awesome people.� Stephen holds degrees in psychology, religious studies, social work, and special education. As a classroom teacher, tutor, and mentor, he is currently working with leaders at the national, state, and local levels to ensure that sports become a welcoming place for all.

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Calendar of Events LOVE: From Showtunes to iTunes June 5-8

June 2014 Sun. 1 Options/RI Pride Guide Release Party, 3-6pm,The Stable, 125 Washington Street, Providence. Sun. 1 Countdown to Pride: Eighty-Eight Lounge, featuring pianist Danny Arico, 6pm, 55 Union Street, Providence. No cover. Donations benefit RI Pride. Wed. 4 Countdown to Pride: Rainbow Flag Raising over Providence City Hall, 5pm. Thu. 5 - Sun. 8 LOVE: From Showtunes to iTunes, Providence Gay Men’s Chorus, 7pm (Sun at 4pm). Beneficent Church, 300 Weybosset Street, Providence. $20. Tickets purchased via www.provgmc.org or www.eventbrite.com/pgmc. Fri. 6 Temple Habonim’s Third Annual Gay Pride Shabbat, 7:30pm. 165 New Meadow Road, Barrington. Guest speaker Max Chaiken will lead all in singing. For more information call 245-6536 or www.templehabonim.org. Fri. 6 Countdown to Pride: King and Queen Ocean State Pageant, 9pm, Mirabar, 15 Elbow Street, Providence. For more information visit www.prideri.com. Fri 6. Countdown to Pride: Kiki Lola’s, Lola’s Tequila Bar and Cantina. 525 South Water Street, Providence. For more information visit www.ripride.com Sat 7. RI Women’s Association Pride Dance, 7pm. St. Martin’s Episcopal Church, New Bedford, MA. DJ Sarah Mello. $10 Sun. 8 Countdown to Pride Lube Wrestling, 9pm. EGO, 73 Richmond Street, Providence. Tue. 10 GenSilent:The LGBT Aging Film, 5:30-7:30pm,Warwick Public Library, Sandy Lane Branch, 600 Sandy Lane, Warwick. Hosted by SAGE/RI, Office of Lt. Gov. Elizabeth Roberts, and the RI Long Term Care Coordinating Council Subcommittee on LGBT Elder Care. Free. Discussion following film. For more information call 222-2371. Wed. 11 Pride Volunteer Orientation, 7pm, RI Pride Center, 1005 Main St. #1105, Pawtucket, RI. Discover volunteer opportunities for this year’s PrideFest and beyond. Pizza and beverages served. All are welcome.

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Community Listening Session on LGBT Elder Care June 17 Thu. 12 Countdown to Pride: at Providence Melting Pot, 199 Providence Place Mall, Providence. Proceeds benefit RI Pride. Fore more information visit www.prideri.com. Fri. 13 Countdown to Pride: Providence Eagle, 125 Snow Street, Providence. 9pm. Fri. 13 Melissa Ferrick plays Manchester 65, 8pm. 65 Manchester Street, West Warwick. Mary Ann Rossoni opens. For tickets see www.manchester65.com. Sat. 14 Boston Pride Parade and Festival: Be Yourself, Change the World, 12pm, downtown Boston, MA. For more info see www.bostonpride.org. To attend and volunteer with RI Pride email volunteers@prideri.com. Sat. 14 Countdown to Pride: The Salon, No cover. 55 Eddy Street, Providence. 10pm. Sun. 15 Countdown to Pride: DeVille’s Karaoke, 9pm. No cover. Donations collected for RI Pride. 345 South Water Street, Providence. Tue. 17 Pride Volunteer Orientation, 7pm, RI Pride Center. See Wed. June 11. Tue. 17 Community Listening Session on LGBT Elder Care, 5:30-7:30pm. Cranston Public Library, William Hall Branch, 1825 Broad Street, Cranston. An opportunity for the community to be heard on the topic of elder care to inform the work of the RI Long Term Care Coordinating Council subcommittee on LGBT Elder Care. Hosted by the Office of Lt. Governor Elizabeth Roberts, SAGE/RI, and the Long Term Care Coordinating Council. For more info call 222-2371 or email mtocco@ltgov.state.ri.us. Wed. 18 Queer Book Club, 7pm, Books on the Square, 471 Angell Street, Providence. Prairie Silence, by Melanie Hoffert. Discount if book is purchased at Books on the Square. For book selection and further info, email queerbookclub@ gmail.com. Thu. 19 RI Pride Gay Bingo, 7pm, Riviera Bingo Palace, 1612 Elmwood Avenue, Cranston. Doors open at 6pm. $20 to play. Bingo benefits RI Pride. Wear your Pride colors!

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RI PrideFest and Illuminated Night Parade June 21 Sat. 21 RI PrideFest and Illuminated Night Parade: Triumph & Transformation, 12pm, Providence Waterfront, South Water Street, Providence. Parade kicks off downtown at dusk. $5 suggested donation. See www.prideri.com for info. Sun. 22 Hangover Drag Brunch to benefit RI Pride. For more information visit www.prideri.com. Sun. 22 RI Prime Timers, 4:30-7pm, network for gay and bisexual men 50+. Social, dinner, and meeting. For information visit www.riprimetimers.org or call Steve at 996-3010. Sun. 22 Mary Day Band plays Manchester 65, 4pm, 65 Manchester Street, West Warwick. For tickets visit www.manchester65.com. Sat. 29 Bartender of the Year, 8pm. The Colosseum, 180 Pine Street, Providence. Cast your ballot to benefit RI Pride at your favorite bar.

July 2014

Sat. 5–Sat. 12 Camp Lightbulb, summer camp for LGBT youth, ages 14-18, in Provincetown, MA. Full and partial scholarships available. For information and registration visit www.camplightbulb.org. Thu. 10 Sweet Little Variety Show, Eighty-Eight Lounge, 8pm, 55 Union Street, Providence. $6. 21+. Featuring Beledi Dance Company, drag, comedy, music and host Nicool. Sat. 12 RI Pride Volunteer Appreciation Party, 2pm, 432 Massasoit Avenue, East Providence. Email volunteers@ prideri.com to learn more.

Options | June 2014

Bartender of the Year June 29

Sun. 13 RI Prime Timers, 4:30-7pm, network for gay and bisexual men 50+. Social, dinner, and meeting. For information see www.riprimetimers.org or call Steve at 996-3010. Wed. 16 Queer Book Club, 7pm, Books on the Square, 471 Angell Street, Providence. The Picture of Dorian Gray, ed. by Nicholas Frankel. Discount if book is purchased at Books on the Square. For book selection and further information, email queerbookclub@gmail.com. Sun. 20 Comedian Vickie Shaw, 6pm, Indigo Lounge, 599 Tiogue Avenue, Coventry. Tickets are $20 and available at Indigo. For information call 615-9600. Wed. 23 RI Pride Open House, 7pm, Pride Center, 1005 Main Street #1105, Pawtucket. General social gathering and discussion of community events and opportunities for involvement. All are welcome. www.prideri.com

Regularly Scheduled Support Groups: ACOS (youth) – Tues. 4pm, (gay males) – Wed. 1:30pm COLAGE (children of LGBTs) – 3rd Sat. 10:30am PFLAG (parents, friends, allies) – 1st Wed. 6:45pm (No meeting 7/2/14) TGI Network (trans*) –1st & 3rd Tues. & Sat. 7pm TransFamily New England - 2nd Mon. 6:30pm Youth Pride, Inc./Way Out – Tues. 5pm See Resources on page 55 for more information.

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Letter to the Editor

Recent reports released by RI investigative journalist Jim Hummel reveal that my husband, Andrew Winters, along with his University of Rhode Island (URI) GLBT Center assistant, Joe Santiago, were removed after they joined students in speaking up about anti-LGBT bullying, and a pervasively hostile and dangerous anti-LGBT campus climate. A GLAD assessment submitted to University officials also supported the gravity of the concerns that students, Joe, and Andrew were raising.

The absence of accountability also allows senior University and Board officials to ignore appeals or inquiries from elected public officials, esteemed faculty, concerned alums, and others. Whispering campaigns are initiated to obscure these illegal actions, and to destroy the reputation and credibility of those, like Andrew and Joe, whose speaking out is badly needed by LGBT people and others.

A group of us who have been working to address these The unjust termination of Andrew and Joe’s employment concerns are seeking the support of the Options community to was made possible by a system at URI which enables the call on our public officials to correct these systemic problems suppression of harassment, discrimination, and retaliation as well as the injustices done to Andrew and Joe. We also complaints. This system operates through combined efforts of need to demand that senior officials be held accountable to board of education and senior URI officials who can operate address matters of discrimination, harassment and retaliation without accountability to silence and remove those who report promptly and ethically, in accordance with laws and policy.These bullying, discrimination, or other illegal actions. Once this system corrective measures cannot be left solely to those who have has targeted someone, very little can interrupt the severe been targeted for their appropriate reporting and speaking. RICPB_Pride Ad_2.375x3.875_Layout 1 2/26/13 1:41 PM Page 1 harassment and coercion designed to force someone out of Anything less leaves RI public higher education, and our state, devoid of integrity and severely at risk. LGBT people and others the University. The absence of systemic checks and balances allows must be able to rely upon stated protections, established people to be removed from their employment by creating false processes, and assurances of fair and equal treatment.

records and untrueAd_2.375x3.875_Layout accusations, or by forcing employees sign RICPB_Pride 1 to 2/26/13 1:41 PM Page 1 agreements to resign under extreme duress. Public funds are then used to pay people off, and force them into silence.

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News Briefs

Rep. Frank Ferri Considers Bid for Lieutenant Governor

PGMC: Best Chorus 7 Years Running

“I wouldn’t be considering this position if I didn’t think I could make a difference, and so Tony and I will continue to explore this unique opportunity to serve,” said Ferri. “We look forward to making a formal announcement at the appropriate time.” First elected in a November 2007, Ferri represents Rhode Island House District 22 in Warwick. Two Democrats have officially announced their candidacies for lieutenant governor: Secretary of State Ralph Mollis and Cumberland Mayor Dan McKee. No Republican candidate has publicly announced an intention to seek the lieutenant governor’s office. The primary is Sept. 9, and the general election is Nov. 4.

The Providence Gay Men’s Chorus has once again been voted Best Choral Group by Motif Magazine. “The Chorus has been steadily working to improve the quality of their musical performances,” said Bradford Greer. RI Entertainment Magazine writes that PGMC “strive[s] to produce professionalquality shows, combining the best of musical theater, cabaret and traditional choral performance. Their struggle for equality has been an uphill battle, but as times change and minds open, some day it will all just be about the music.” The Chorus has won the award every year since 2008.

HRC Announces Southern Equality Campaign

Pentagon Reviews Policy Barring Transgender Soldiers

The Human Rights Campaign announced Project One America, a comprehensive campaign to dramatically expand LGBT equality in the South through continuing campaigns in Mississippi, Alabama and Arkansas where there are currently no non-discrimination protections for LGBT people at the state or local level in employment, housing or public accommodations, and where each state’s constitution expressly prohibits marriage equality.

Regarding health regulations barring military service by transgender persons, Secretary of Defense Chuck Hagel said he believes that regulations should be reviewed. On ABC’s This Week with George Stephanopoulos, Hagel said, “I do think it continually should be reviewed. I’m open to that. I’m open to those assessments, because – again, I go back to the bottom line – every qualified American who wants to serve our country should have an opportunity if they fit the qualifications and can do it.”

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Rhode Island LGBTQ Center The Center for the RI LGBTQ Community unanimously elected a slate of founding officers at their monthly board meeting in April.They are: Chair Andy Morris;ViceChair Kim Stowell; Treasurer Stephen Hartley; and Secretary Brian Gay. The Center is awaiting approval of its 501(c) (3) non-profit application, which was filed with the IRS in December. To learn more, visit www.rilgbtqcenter.org, like RILGBTCenter on Facebook & follow it on Twitter @RILGBTQCenter.

Options | June 2014


New RI Bills Seek LGBT-Friendly Health Care Facilities

10 Years of Marriage Equality in the US May 17 marked the 10th anniversary of the very first marriages of same-sex couples in the United States, thanks to the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court ruling on November 18, 2003, in the case Goodridge v. Department of Public Health. Chief Justice Margaret H. Marshall wrote, “The Massachusetts Constitution affirms the dignity and equality of all individuals. It forbids the creation of second class citizens. In reaching our conclusion we have given full deference to the arguments made by the Commonwealth. But it has failed to identify any constitutionally adequate reason for denying civil marriage to same-sex couples.” Since 2004, sixteen more states and the District of Columbia have attained marriage equality. The Defense of Marriage Act was declared unconstitutional in the Windsor decision from the U.S. Supreme Court last year.

House Bill 7652 (sponsored by Reps. Walsh, Ajello, Tanzi, Handy, and Craven) and Senate Bill 2554 (sponsored by Sens. Goodwin and Miller) both propose to add sexual orientation, gender identity and gender expression to the list of groups protected from discrimination in licensed health-care facilities. In addition, both bills would require facilities to attest to the fact that they have these anti-discrimination policies in place whenever they apply for a new or renewed license. SAGE is asking you to write letters in support of both of these pieces of legislation today.

News Conference Held Opposing Constitutional Convention Saying that a state Constitutional Convention would open the door to proposals targeting the civil rights of women, LGBT folks, immigrants and other minorities, a coalition of groups held a news conference April 30 at the “Old State House” on Benefit Street in Providence, calling for defeat of the fall ballot question that would authorize such a convention. The news conference was called under the auspices of Citizens for Responsible Government with speakers from the Rhode Island AFL-CIO, Planned Parenthood of Southern New England, Latino Public Radio, Rhode Island Pride & the Rhode Island Affiliate of the American Civil Liberties Union.

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Out on the Town Photos by Jack Hartwein-Sanchez

AIDS Care Ocean State’s 4th Annual King of Queens Sunday, May 4th

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AUDITIONS To schedule, email: chorus@providencesingers.org More info at www.providencesingers.org 2014-2015 SEASON Christine Noel, Artistic Director With RI Philharmonic Orchestra Carmina Burana and Handel’s Messiah

Concert Series Dvořák, Mendelssohn, Bach and more!

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Out on the Town cont.

Tribute to Kim Stowell Saturday April 19

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Options | June 2014


Imperial Court of RI Coronation Saturday, April 26

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“On the Shoulders of Giants” Jen Stevens

An Interview with Rodney Davis

Options: How would you describe your experience as a Jehovah’s Witness before coming out?

avoid the company of disfellowshipped individuals.” - Watchtower 2011 Nov 15 p.5.

Rodney: Surprisingly, most of my experiences with Jehovah’s Witnesses were very happy ones. I enjoyed my work in the ministry, developed some of the strongest friendships ever in my life and I had a real purpose in my life. It was not until I began to wrestle with my sexual identity that I also had to tackle issues of my faith and the real understanding that many of the things I clung to in my beliefs were not what I truly believed. Often when people are so close to something, everything else is out of focus and you need to step back and see the whole picture and things become clearer. A great awakening was about to happen.

“Really, what your beloved family member needs to see is your resolute stance to put Jehovah above everything else, including the family bond. … Do not look for excuses to associate with a disfellowshipped family member, for example, through e-mail.” Watchtower 2013 Jan 15 p.16

O: How did coming out affect your relationships with the church and your family? R: Unfortunately, one of the more devastating things that happens when a Witness comes out and engages in what the organization deems un-Christian conduct is the process of a judicial committee … if the person is unrepentant - removal from the congregation. O: Rodney then supplied quotes from The Watchtower magazine about the outcome of this process and went on to explain Watchtower’s impact. R: “Thus “disfellowshipping” is what Jehovah’s Witnesses appropriately call the expelling and subsequent shunning of such an unrepentant wrongdoer.” - Watchtower 1981 Sep 15 p.22. “And all members of the congregation need to be determined to

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So those who continue to believe Watchtower doctrine are told that while being disfellowshipped they are condemned to everlasting destruction without the hope of life. Likewise those who become unbelievers, with no intention of returning to Jehovah’s Witnesses, realize they are unlikely to freely associate with Witness family and friends for the remainder of their lives. I was disfellowshipped in June 1992 after writing the elders in my congregation that I was gay and could never change that fact. A judicial committee was formed and determined that I should be removed “in order to keep the congregation clean.” The following day I came out publicly on NewsWatch10 with Cathy Ray being interviewed about events related to RI Pride. I had been quietly volunteering for a year prior to that but now the doors were blown open. My relationship with my family and friends changed immediately and remains the same to this day. Though I do not regret my decision, I grieve daily at not having the close and loving relationship with my family and friends most take for granted. I dread every day that my mom will have passed away and I will not be able to say goodbye or enjoy the company of my friends in the JW organization ever again. Not a day goes by without me thinking of them in some way. But on the flip side, my training and experience with Jehovah’s

Options | June 2014


Witnesses has been invaluable in my work and organizing for the community and I would not have been able to accomplish what I have become without it. O: How were you introduced to the gay rights movement in RI, and when was that? What was going on at the time? R: In the late 1980s I used to sneak into the bars and clubs in Providence but I hid in the shadows of places like the Mirabar and Gerardo’s.You would hear things going on but I wouldn’t get too close. I remember attending my first Walk for Life in 1990 and was invited to go to Pride. The Walk was a “safe event” to be seen at but I wasn’t too sure about Pride. I snuck into the crowd and laid low. The following year I attended Pride and was introduced to Christopher Burke and Julie Pell from the RI Alliance for Lesbian and Gay Civil Rights.These two courageous warriors through their warm but powerful encouragement helped me to see how I could use my training in the ministry to further the cause of equal rights. The issue of securing a comprehensive civil rights bill was being fought in the State House and in 1993 I began actively working with the Alliance. I served as its VP for Outreach and Development when we won and passed that law in May 1995 and RI became the ninth state to make it illegal to discriminate against the “LGB” but not the “T” of our community. The fight continued and our trans community members were eventually protected by law. It was a thrilling time to be active in the community; you could not only read about this history unfolding but you could be a part of it.

O: You have volunteered steadily for Pride since 1991. Can you describe your first experience at RI PrideFest? R: I started volunteering in 1991 doing clean-up. The festival was more like a rally with a few entertainers on the stairs and south lawn of the State House. Because of restrictions, we couldn’t have vendors, stages or a beer tent. In 1992, I marched in the parade, and in 1993 started working on graphics for the organization, and then in 1995 started to work in the leadership of the organization. That same year we moved the festival to India Point Park with the parade beginning at the State House. O: What has been your favorite location for PrideFest? R: Though I love the location of PrideFest on South Water Street, it was Station Park that always will have a special place for me. It signaled to the state and community that we had arrived and did it big. It was also a great venue for visibility which is one of the goals of our mission O: Who has been your favorite PrideFest performer? R: That’s a hard question, we have had some of the best in the industry, but I will say the most humble performer I worked with who had immense talent was Frenchie Davis. She had such a command of the stage as a powerhouse diva and yet was just like you and me and would love to sit on my couch eating smothered chicken, collard greens and corn bread stuffing while we all watched Family Guy. The same week she performed at

O: Whom did you especially look up to as you found your way within the community? R: My first mentors included Cecilie Surasky, Jonathan Lubin and Mark King. They truly were instrumental in my becoming active and engaged in the community. But the beauty of our work is that on that journey to making a better world for all, you work with people who continue to inspire you to do more and be better. People like Alex Gorriaran, Kate Monteiro, Marti Rosenberg, Stephen Hartley, Tina Wood, Derek Livingston, Wendy Becker, Nancy Rose, Julie Smith, Russell Murphy, Pam O’Brien and countless other people who all helped shaped, guide and inspire me. But I would be remiss if I didn’t acknowledge the unwavering love and support of my better half, Brian Mills who has gone through everything with me and continues to stand by me as we both share in this important work. O: Did you imagine Rhode Islanders would achieve marriage equality in 2013? R: Yes, I knew it would be a long time coming, but I knew we would get there. It wasn’t going to be overnight but were educating not only the members of the General Assembly but also the greater community as to who we are and Pride had a powerful hand in that.

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cont. from pg. 19 our PrideFest she came out nationally in the press as a bisexual member of the community. We were very proud! O: If you could have anyone headline PrideFest whom would you choose? R: Its funny. In 1999, Whitney Houston made an appearance at the Pier Dance for Heritage of Pride/NYC Pride [who found out] she was coming just a day or two before the event and they had to change everything including the stage. From that moment forward, I have never not had a stage for Whitney. Though she is no longer with us, there are many legends I would love to see cross our stage. Kitty Litter is still pushing for Patti LaBelle and I would pay money for that but other performers include EnVogue, Tevin Campbell, Adam Lambert or, if we were dreaming and money wasn’t an object, Melissa Etheridge or Ricky Martin would be on that stage. O: What’s surprised you most community’s struggle for equality?

throughout

our

R: When we were fighting for the civil rights law, there was a sense of urgency. After that victory and subsequent victories with trans-inclusive civil rights, overturning the sodomy law, expansion of hate crime laws, the progressive powerhouse that was known as RI began to slow down. Though I was confident we would pass marriage equality, it didn’t speak to everyone like

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the other issues. Now we ask: what’s next? We must continue to remember that we still need to be engaged in all levels of our greater community from politics, faith communities, economic development, education to arts and entertainment. The laws we have won are tools; what are we building for the future? O: Would you describe the most triumphant moment you’ve experienced in the LGBT movement? R: Interestingly in 1994, I was the recipient of the Pyramid of Pride and at the moment I was given the award it broke and fell apart right in front of the audience. I took that as a sign. Though I was humbled by the honor, I didn’t yet feel I did anything extraordinary. I put the pieces in a box and put them away. We had work yet to do. Almost one year later in 1995 with the passage of the civil rights bills in the House and Senate, the culmination of so much hard work, the blood, sweat and lots of tears became triumphant. Another experience would be just a couple of years ago when our numbers at the parade became so massive and we saw tens of thousands of people lining the streets of Providence either as members of the LGBTQ community or supporters. You knew our mission was being accomplished. O: Have you ever felt physically unsafe or been threatened for being gay? R: Yes, especially as a African-American gay man. Things are

Options | June 2014


better but one must never forget that hatred is still alive and well in these United States of America. O: How long have you and Brian Mills been together? R: Brian and I met in late summer 1997 on AOL. O: You and Brian operated as a team within Pride for many years. Brian is more of a behind the scenes person while you’re often on the mic. What’s it like to live, work, and volunteer so closely with your partner? R: “Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their hard work. For if one of them falls, the other can help his partner up. But what will happen to the one who falls with no one to help him up?” - Ecclesiastes 4:9, 10. Those ancient words still apply today yet it is hard work but I would not have it any other way. We both work in the same office at The Met School/Big Picture Learning handling communications, the Arts and Media Center and special events but the most fulfilling part is working with students and being instrumental their learning. Thus we are helping create a culture of acceptance and understanding that is real and authentic. As we often talk about, Pride is 365 days a year, in whatever you are doing. We feel privileged to have a small share in shaping the world for the better. O: Do you and Brian plan to get married? R: Yes, this year. The challenge is finding the time in our very

G.O.A.L. New England

busy schedules. O: If you could be granted one wish for the RI LGBTQ community, what would it be? R: To find the peace and love within our community to allow us to grow, expand and influence the world around us. O: What advice do you have for the youth of our community? R: Never forget our past as you transform the future. Remember that our movement is based in love and with that most powerful force in the universe you can create anything you put your mind and energies towards. Dream wildly, walk slowly and enjoy every moment of your youth, it only happens once. I’ll end with thoughts of my favorite author, Maya Angelou, to not only the youth but to everyone that these words may touch: “You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them. Try to be a rainbow in someone else’s cloud. Do not complain. Make every effort to change things you do not like. If you cannot make a change, change the way you have been thinking. You might find a new solution.” On the Shoulders of Giants is an ongoing series showcasing those who have dedicated decades to furthering LGBTQ equality in RI and have made major conributions to our community’s shared history and victories.This is the third interview in the series.

P.O. Box 171587 Boston, MA 02117 A 501(c)(3) non-profit

New England's only GLBT public safety organization for all law enforcement, corrections, military, firefighters and publicly employed EMS.

Facebook: New England G.O.A.L. Options | June 2014

www.NewEnglandgoal.org 21


The RI LGBTQ Center’s mission is to build and support the LGBTQ community by providing a visible, safe and inclusive place.

Let us persevere and transform ourselves for the better. Together we will triumph. rilgbtqcenter@gmail.com

rilgbtqcenter.org

Š Center for the RI LGBT Community. All rights reserved.


AIDS Care Ocean State Christopher Dalpe 4th Annual King of Queens Thirteen local celebrities performed at the 4th Annual King of Queens on May 4 at the Colosseum nightclub in Providence. The contestants had no previous drag experience and were each assigned a drag mother to mentor them in choosing a look, song, and performance style for the biggest drag show of the year. The contestants did not disappoint. There was glitter, glamour, and fantastic stage presence. This year, King of Queens raised nearly $14,000 for AIDS Care Ocean State’s programs and services! Words cannot express how humbled and moved we all are by this truly remarkable and record-breaking night. Congratulations to King of Queens 2014 Sapphire Rose, aka Justin Nicoll. ACOS wishes to thank all of our performers for putting their hearts into this, our drag mothers and judges for donating time and expertise, Alysha Brock, the heart and mind behind King of Queens, Tara Bonang and Carol Mann for being so helpful, Anthony and the Colosseum staff for hosting another enjoyable event, our fantastic DJ Cisco, and all of our attendees for showing such overwhelming support. See you at Pride! ACOS encourages everyone to visit our PrideFest booth

AcAdemic

RAciAlly diveRse

for free, confidential HIV and hepatitis C testing with twentyminute results, and free safe sex kits. Or call our confidential prevention office at 781-0665 to schedule an appointment. Gay Bingo Season Wraps Up The 2013-2014 Gay Bingo season wraps up June 19 at the Riviera Bingo Palace in Cranston. Rhode Island Pride will be sponsoring Bingo and raising funds to support PrideFest 2014. This year has been such a huge success, thanks to our supporters, volunteers and season sponsors: Mister Sister, Big Gay Al’s Bowling League, Town Hall Lanes, Pelletier & Clark, GALA Bowling League, Whole Foods Market, The Stable, Dark Lady & Alley Cat, Raymond Insurance Agency, Amazing Intimate Essentials, Providence Performing Arts Center, Gold’s Gym, the Comedy Connection, Pepsi, The Stadium Theatre, Bravo Brasserie, Blaze Eastside, DeVille’s Cafe and the ACOS Board. Special thanks to our Bingo Crew: Alysha Brock, Carol Mann, Leo Mansi, Shannon McKeever, Christine Moreau, Brett Quinn, Rayna Reis, Haley Star, Franklin Starr and Tom Wright. We’ll see you in September!

child-centeRed

GORDON SCHOOL School is proud to support Rhode Island’s LGBTQ community. We are an inclusive, diverse, and safe community for all families. We host COLAGE’s monthly meetings, which are facilitated by a Gordon School faculty member and open to the public. We invite your family to visit Gordon. Call or email today! 401-434-3833 x116 or admission@gordonschool.org.

Nursery to eighth grade • East Providence, RI

www.gordonschool.org

Options | June 2014

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Lesbians on the Loose Annie Cronin-Silva & Melanie Silva

Tribute to Kim Stowell The Tir Na Nog Spa on South Main Street in Providence was the perfect location to gather on a warm April evening to honor Options’ Kim Stowell for her more than seven years of dedication and contribution to the magazine as Managing Editor. The relaxed cocktail party was a splendid occasion that brought new volunteers together with faces from the past, who told nostalgic and heartwarming stories of the “old mailing nights” and how things used to be. You could hear in their voices the love, gratitude and admiration they all have for Kim, who was the center of attention, except maybe when her grandson Liam came by to help her celebrate. Thank you, Kim, for all the countless hours of service you provided to the magazine and our community. We found ourselves in Newport on the last Friday in April to attend Interweave Channing’s Born This Way Prom, intended for the LGBTQ community and their allies but welcoming to all. For many youth, prom is a rite of passage, a milestone in their

King of Queens

high school career.This night proved to be just that for sixty-plus students. The Carousel at Easton’s Beach Rotunda was open to attendees and we took a spin as the sun descended and light cascaded across the sky behind us, making an impressive backdrop for photos. What a blast! Pam Goff was the true heart and spirit of this event and a joy to watch. We were drawn to her smile and enthusiasm and how she interacts with young people, even keeping up with them on DJ Butch’s packed dance floor. She has moves like Jagger! A highlight of the night came when drag performers Vi’let LaBoss, Jacqueline DiMera and Nadia Starr energized the crowd with their performances. We reminisced about our own prom experiences, wishing this type of prom existed when we were in high school. We mused that hopefully it won’t always be necessary to hold an “all-inclusive prom,” dreaming that society would move towards acceptance for all. Toward the end of the night Jason Bartlett

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Options | June 2014


and Jessica Brand were crowned Prom King and Queen and took their traditional dance as we all clapped and cheered.Their smiles lit up the room. We could tell this was a dream come true for them. It was touching to see the youth form a circle to embrace one another on the dance floor. The 4th Annual King of Queens event, a competition among first-time drag performers, earned $14,000+ for Aids Care Ocean State. (See page 23 for more details.) The Colosseum was packed with spectators cheering for their favorite competitor. We anxiously awaited our dear friend John Kelley’s performance. John is the type of person you love to be around; he always makes you feel happy. When he stepped on stage as Stella Round, he was flawless: gorgeous hair, makeup and gown. Watching him perform and look glamorous with the biggest smile on his face was a joy. His contagious energy spread throughout the room as we all rushed the stage to donate tips. Perhaps the loudest applause came when host Kitty Litter asked the straight contestants to step forward. Proud drag mother Haley Star’s talented drag daughter Justin won the title of King of Queens! With all the Pride events coming up, you’re sure to see the Lesbians on the Loose out and about. Don’t be shy – say hello and maybe take a photo with us. Who knows, you may see yourself in Options!

The RI Prime Timers are a World Wide Organization for the purpose of bringing together Older Men and their admirers for social interaction, friendship, and support. Join us for our Monthly Dinner Meeting Visit us: www.riprimetimers.org

St. Peter’s & St. Andrew’s Episcopal Church A charming wedding venue in the Mt. Pleasant area of Providence Join us for worship on Sundays at 10:00am A rainbow congregation

272-9649

stpeters-standrews.org


Taking the Test Tom Bertrand, Executive Director of AIDS Project Rhode Island It was September 1994, and I had never imagined myself sitting alone in the crowded and chaotic basement of Traveler’s Aid Society, now known as Crossroads, in downtown Providence waiting to get my first HIV test results. I had gone in two weeks earlier, met with a phlebotomist who took a vial of blood, and was advised to return in fourteen days for the results. Although the room was filled with other people waiting to receive various services, I felt lonely and afraid. The entire two-week experience was emotionally and physically draining and left me depressed. The news was good: The test result was negative. I knew one thing: I never wanted to go through that process again. Fortunately, twenty years later, Rhode Islanders have access to many HIV testing services in comforting and safe environments. Rapid HIV tests are widely available that provide results in twenty minutes. Clients have a choice: A simple and painless mouth swab or finger-prick. There are many organizations that offer anonymous testing at no cost. Most testing sites welcome the LGBTQ community. At AIDS Project Rhode Island (APRI), both individual and couples HIV testing is offered. Today I am a licensed Rhode Island HIV Test Counselor and have provided tests to over 250 people. Most people who come in for testing are seeking the peace of mind a negative test result brings. I have witnessed mixed reactions to receiving a negative HIV test result – huge sighs of relief, silent reflection, and tears of joy – with each of these responses being profound in their own way. For those who receive a positive HIV test result, I provide counseling, assurance, and support as they proceed to confirmatory testing and medical care. A positive test result often includes managing many difficult personal issues, including informing partners. However, there are strong systems in place

in Rhode Island to help people living with HIV access medical care, medications, and other social services, regardless of income and health insurance status. It takes great courage to get an HIV test. However, I’m hopeful that people will take advantage of the free, friendly, and rapid-testing services in Rhode Island. The peace of mind, regardless of the test result, is well worth it. HIV Testing Resources: AIDS Project Rhode Island: www.aidsprojectri.org. The Miriam Hospital HIV/STD Clinic: www.miriamhospital.org/hiv-prevention/ Rhode Island Department of Health: www.justgettestedri.org

When the community works together, the community works A healthy, vibrant community depends on the participation of its members. And the more diverse their backgrounds, experiences and skills, the more interesting and unique their solutions. Bank of America is honored to be connected to Rhode Island PrideFest for their leadership in creating common goals while nurturing self-empowerment. Visit us at bankofamerica.com/ RhodeIsland

Life’s better when we’re connected™ ©2014 Bank of America Corporation | ARH46WCM

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Options | June 2014


Options | June 2014

Enjoy Responsibly ©2014 A-B, Bud Light® Beer, 27St. Louis, MO


Pride Essentials by Brian Mills

Here are a few guidelines and tips to make your PrideFest experience safe, happy and healthy. Getting to PrideFest: PrideFest takes place on South Water Street, along the Providence River waterfront. Driving: Use 345 South Water Street, Providence for a GPS location. From the North or South: I-95 to exit 22A towards downtown/Memorial Blvd. At the sixth traffic light you will see the festival entrance at the road closure at South Water Street. From the East: I-195 West to exit 2. Proceed on South Main Street. Make a left onto College Hill and then a left onto Memorial Blvd. At the next traffic light you will see the festival entrance. From the West: Take US Rt. 6 East/ Rt. 10 North towards I-95. Take the downtown exit. Count six traffic lights to the festival entrance. Parking: In addition to more than 40 parking lots and garages, downtown Providence has over 1,100 on-street parking spaces. Meters cost $0.25/12 minutes and are in effect MondaySaturday from 8am-6pm. Parking is free all other times. Street parking is limited in the area immediately around the festival site. The Dyer Street parking lots are adjacent to the festival and are within easy walking distance from the parade route. Providence Place Mall and Rhode Island Convention Center parking lots are also just a ten minute walk down the river. Bus: The RIPTA Bus Terminal located in Kennedy Plaza is within walking distance from the festival site. For scheduling information visit www.ripta.com or call 781-9400. Peter Pan Bus Lines (800-343-9999, www.peterpanbus.com) offers service from Boston, Hartford, the Cape and New York City. Greyhound Bus Lines (800-231-2222, www.greyhound.com) also offers service to Providence’s Kennedy Plaza.

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Train: PrideFest is just ten minutes down the riverwalk, from the Providence Train Station which is served by Amtrak [800-USA-RAIL/www.amtrak.com] and the Massachusetts Bay Transportation Authority (MBTA) [800-392-6100/ww.mbta. com] commuter trains, though be careful to check the return schedule. Safety Tips: If you have a medical or police emergency dial 911. The Providence Police are at the festival along with RI Pride Security teams. If you have a non-emergency medical need there is a first aid tent located near the Disaster Medical Assistance Team trailer across from the Kids Zone. Pride volunteers and security staff can be identified by their t-shirts and identification badges. If you need information or assistance within the PrideFest grounds please feel free to approach a volunteer. Take care of all personal belongings and be aware of those around you. Keep wallets, purses, handbags, cell phones, and cameras secure and in sight at all times. Many organizations, including RI Pride, will be asking for donations at PrideFest. Individuals soliciting donations for organizations should be identifiable by badges or affiliation information. If you believe that someone is pan-handling or harassing guests for money, please report the activity to Pride security. Even though PrideFest is a safe and friendly venue, we still recommend the buddy system. Spend the day with a friend, travel to and from the festival in a group and make sure that you stay aware of your personal safety. Remember to carry identification with you at all times. We want your Pride experience to be as safe and enjoyable as possible. Trash and Recycling bins are located throughout the festival grounds. Please be responsible with your trash and keep the street as clean as possible. RI Pride is responsible for the cleanup and removal of all trash from South Water Street. Please help us by pitching in. Alcoholic Beverages: A festival is a place to party, and some people like to do that with a drink. The Beer, Wine and Spirits

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Tent is located adjacent to the Main Stage. Proper ID will be required to enter and to purchase alcohol. All alcohol must be consumed within the fenced area. Please drink responsibly. Pets are allowed on the festival grounds. For everyone’s safety, please keep your pet leashed. Be courteous and pick up after your animal should he or she “answer the call of nature.” Bicycles, Skateboards, Skates, Scooters and motorized vehicles of any kind are prohibited from the festival grounds for the safety of our guests. Lost & Found and Lost Children: RI Pride does not operate a lost and found service, but sometimes people turn in found items to the Pride administration tent near the Kids Zone. Lost children should be taken to the Pride information/security tent or to a police officer. ATMS are located on the festival grounds for your convenience. There is a transaction fee of $3.50. The RI Pride Illuminated Night Parade winds its way from the intersection of Fountain and Dorrance Streets through downtown and past PPAC. Pride volunteers and the Providence Police work extremely hard to keep the more than 15,000 people who crowd the streets of Providence safe and happy. Following these simple suggestions can help maximize your viewing experience. Spectators must remain on the sidewalk as the parade passes. People standing on the street are not only a safety hazard

but also block the parade from passing and slow the procession. The parade route in front of the Providence Biltmore and near the Providence Performing Arts Center can become very congested. Prime viewing is also available on Washington Street between Union Street and Snow Street and on Empire Street near AS220. Many of the city streets remain open to traffic during the parade. Please observe all police direction and obey traffic signals and crosswalks. Do not approach floats or vehicles in the parade. Vehicles are likely to move without notice. If you are not officially registered in the parade, please do not enter the parade route. Keep your children safe and out of danger. Use extra caution with strollers on the parade route and hold young children’s hands. Children should not be allowed to enter the parade route for any reason without adult supervision. We hope you have a great day with RI Pride at the PrideFest and Parade. However, even in the fun atmosphere of a festival, the Providence Police are responsible for enforcing all applicable state laws and local ordinances during the Pride event including, but not limited to: public decency, alcohol, controlled substances, public safety, and parking. RI Pride as the event organizer, reserves the right to decline admittance to anyone who violates the reasonable policies established for public safety, tries to gain entrance to restricted areas, or causes serious disruption to the good order of the event. Have a happy, fun and safe Pride!

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1. The Dark Lady/Alley Cat 2. Providence Eagle 3. Club Body Center 4. Courtyard Marriott

5. Mirabar located off map, 15 Elbow st 6. The Stable 7. Biltmore Hotel 8. EGO

9. Beneficent Church 10. Providence Performing Arts Center 11. Matthewson Street Church 12. DeVille's


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RHODE ISLAND PRIDE PRESENTS

2014 PrideFest

& Illuminated Night Parade Saturday, June 21, 2014 COLLEGE

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PrideFest 12-8 PM SOUTH WATER STREET, PROVIDENCE

Over 120 vendors, live performances KidsZone and a beer, wine & spirits garden

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Pride Areas of Interest 13. Kennedy Plaza 14. Amtrak Station 15. The Salon 16. Eighty Eight Lounge

21. Bravo Brasserie 17. Hotel Providence/Aspire Restaurant 18. The Dean Hotel 19. Hampton Inn 20. Lola's Tequila Bar & Cantina located off map, 525 S Water Street


More Than Just a Dream Tony Aguilar

Congratulations Rhode Islanders! As of August 1 of last year, your dream of attaining same-sex marriage became a reality in the Ocean State. The word “Hope” emblazoned on the seal of the State of Rhode Island and Providence Plantations was a beacon to anyone seeking equal rights in the state. Similarly, the words “Equal Justice Under Law” etched onto the U.S. Supreme Court’s building will one day ring true to all citizens wanting to marry. As this promise settles on the minds of gays and lesbians across the nation, the debate becomes, “If I had the opportunity, would I want to marry anyone at all? How do I want my ceremony to be? Will my partner and I invite all of our family members?” These and other questions were posed by Larry, a well-traveled Providence west-sider, not long ago while sipping his skinny vanilla latte at a café on Broadway. The prospect of tying the knot poses dilemmas gay men and lesbians have never experienced before. The realities of income disparity, education and life experiences are usually brought to the forefront at the beginning of any relationship. “Yes, we both have good-paying jobs and have similar life aspirations, but do I really want to marry this man?” said John, Larry’s boyfriend of four years. They know they are compatible in finances, ambitions, and in bed, but are they ready for the big leap into, supposedly, a lifelong union? Another couple, Alex and Robert from Palm Springs, CA, who have been together for ten years, decided to elope

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this year because they wanted something simple and did not want to involve others in their decision to marry. So on a weekday, both took time out of work, walked into their city’s clerk’s office and got married. Before this, they had a domestic partnership — legal papers filed with an attorney giving each other legal rights in case of medical or financial emergencies. However, getting legally married solidified their bond and “was a true test” of their commitment to their union, Alex intoned. For the lucky few, time is a bond that grows stronger between two loving people, but the potential of time coming between a couple is a prospect many need to reflect upon and heed. Some gays want a marriage but still insist on their freedom to play in an open relationship or be part of a “don’t ask, don’t tell” kind of marriage. Many gay couples have come to realize that giving each other permission to play safely, and without flaunting it, might be their best antidote to lying to each other. They want the freedom to call someone their husband or wife and still be able to share their sexual desires openly and without fear of repercussion. In this marriage scenario, the heterosexual paradigm of marrying and being faithful to a sole individual goes out the window. “Maybe that model of marriage places too much of a burden or high expectation on both people,” says Robert. We all know the sad statistic that 50% of married heterosexual couples divorce in the first five years of their marriage. “It is a jungle out there, and most primates in the real jungle have flings,” he concludes, chuckling. Emily and Stephanie from RI have been together for a year and a half and were one of the first lesbian couples to take advantage of last year's historic law. They knew immediately marriage was for them. Getting the rings and dresses were part of their engagement process. Stephanie adds, "The first dress I tried, I looked like an oompa loompa." Both of them categorized themselves as “traditional” and wanted a small wedding, but ended up with over 100 guests. Emily remembers their ceremony at Colt State Park "was perfect; however, filing joint federal income tax forms was even better!" Because they want to have children, the next big decision is which last name to take. Some men are deciding to take their partner's last name. Changing one's last name due to marriage is a proposition many in the LGBTQ community had not considered before. For Emily and Stephanie, they are considering all options. As last year’s Olympians and this year’s celebrity athletes outing themselves in the media have shown, gays and lesbians have become less of a shock to the puritanical American psyche. Knowing all gays across our great land will one day have the same freedom and protection under U.S. law is a heady thought. Still, there is a long road ahead to achieving similar opportunities. Let anyone seeking “equal justice under law” continue this effort.

Options | June 2014


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PrideFest Entertainment

The original voice behind Madonna for 18 years, dance diva

Niki Haris

American Idol finalist, pop singer

David Hernandez

Emcees:

Ellen Moschetto

Poppy Champlin

Vi’Let

Haley Star

Show your love for Pride! $5+ suggested donation at the gates. John Kelley 34

Jaqueline DiMera Options | June 2014


Saturday, June 21, 2014, noon-8pm South Water Street, Providence

Performers:

Joe Cat

Xelle

Aiden James

Hannah & Maggie

Carrie Ashton

Heather Rose in Clover

Jackie Collins

DJ Andy Morris

Sabrina Blaze

Empress XXII Jealousy Jonz

Emperor XXII Ryder Hard

Existenz N’ Chance

Ms. Lesbian RI 2014 Betty Lebesian

Mr. Gay RI 2014 Anthony Maselli

Miss Gay RI 2014 Nadia Starr

Derek Capobianco

Options | June 2014

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Entertainment Bios

NIKI HARIS is best known for being Madonna’s background singer and dancer for 18 years. This dynamic woman’s impressive solo career spans a multitude of genres, including pop, dance, r&b, jazz and gospel. She has performed and recorded with Ray Charles, the Righteous Brothers, Julian Lennon, Anita Baker, Mick Jagger, Whitney Houston and Madonna. Her vocals are featured on soundtracks for films Corrina Corrina, The Big Green, Coyote Ugly and Anastasia. She recorded multiple television themes and cowrote and performed two songs for the Fox series Dark Angel. She recorded a new jazz CD “Live in London,” toured Europe with her jazz quartet, and performed live dates as Featured Vocalist with RUFUS, stepping in for the legendary Chaka Khan. She released “Special Edition” as well as a Billboard charting dance hit “Let Me Hear The Music.” She also continued her love of jazz by touring with the production of Billie & Me, celebrating Billie Holiday and singing with Nancy Wilson, Dianne Reeves, Rita Coolidge, Joan Osborne, and African songstress Rokia Traore. Niki performs at a multitude of benefits for AIDS, cancer research, Camp Harmony for inner city children and other charitable events. DAVID HERNANDEZ gained national attention with his powerful voice and affable personality as an American Idol finalist. Hernandez recently moved to Hollywood where he is writing new songs, working in the recording studio producing his newest music, and pursuing his passion for acting. He completed his first feature film as the lead in the movie Synthetic Truth. In addition to American Idol, David has showcased his talents on The Ellen Show, The Today Show, MTV’s TRL, EXTRA, Entertainment Tonight, Access Hollywood, Teen Choice Awards, TV Guides’ Sexiest Stars 2008, Idol Tonight, Idol Gives Back, FOX-TV and sang at the Inaugural Kick-Off Celebration ball for President Barack Obama.

two singles “Heart Stops Beating” and “Single.Taken. Complicated,” Derek is on his way to a promising career as an artist. EXISTENZ N’ CHANCE are Rhode Island’s own lyrically gifted lesbian hip-hop sensation. JOE CAT is an up-and-coming contemporary r&b/pop solo artist from Providence. His re-released demo album titled “Magic,” includes 4 hit songs including a dance remix of the single, “Magic.” HANNAH & MAGGIE’s live shows are toe-tapping spectacles of crystal-clear harmonies and heartfelt acoustic arrangements that leave you wanting more. For all those interested in making your ears happy, look no further. HEATHER ROSE IN CLOVER: Rhode Island native Heather Rose has been performing for over 15 years around New England and beyond, taking home several Providence Phoenix Best Music Poll, Motif, and other area awards along the way.The multi-instrumentalist teams up with Lisa Middleton, John Ferreria and Shana Caye. They freshly mix musical styles while never misplacing the rock n’ roll roots that bind them together. XELLE is a hit dance-pop girl group from NYC with over a million YouTube views on their incredible music videos. Their original songs sound like a delicious mix of Ke$ha, ABBA and The Spice Girls, and have earned them thousands of passionate fans around the world.

AIDEN JAMES is an international singer-songwriter touring in support of his new, 100% fan-funded album, “Trouble With This.” The 29-year-old Philadelphia native completely engineered, mixed and produced the album, which climbed to number 28 on iTunes Top 100 Charts. Aiden’s ability to deliver a powerful live show, paired with his songwriting, arranging, composing and technical skills makes him “the new breed of songster.” CARRIE ASHTON is a singer, songwriter and performer from Connecticut. She’s been performing professionally for the last 15 years all over New England and on the east coast. Carrie currently has two records available on iTunes, “Modern Day Gypsy” and “truth is,” and is back in the studio working on her third. She’s opened for Natalie Merchant, The Go Go’s, REO Speedwagon, Antigone Rising and Van Zant. DEREK CAPOBIANCO is a recording artist who was born and raised here in Rhode Island! With the release of his first

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Entertainment Lineup 12:00pm Welcome with Poppy Champlin

3:15pm Derek Capobianco

12:05pm King Pride Ocean State

4:00pm Heather Rose In Clover

12:15pm Existenz N’Chance

3:45pm Miss Gay RI 2014

12:40pm Queen Pride Ocean State

4:35pm National Anthem and Pride Rally

12:50pm Joe Cat

5:00pm Jackie Collins

1:15pm Imperial Court of RI

5:20pm Aiden James

1:25pm Ms.Lesbian RI 2014

5:50pm Xelle

1:40pm Hannah & Maggie

6:20pm Sabrina Blaze

2:05pm Mr. Gay RI 2014

6:30pm David Hernandez

2:25pm Carrie Ashton

7:00pm Niki Haris

3:00pm Vi’Let

7:30pm DJ Andy Morris

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Questioning Queer Ryan Matthews

There are those who do and there are those who do not. There are those who are in, and there are those who are out. There are those who are straight, and those who are—well I’m not quite sure these days.

Q

When did we stop referring to “homosexuals” as such and start talking about the “gay community?” Not only when, but also why? And beyond that, will we shift from the “LGBT” community” to the, (ahem), LGBTQQI2A* community? What does the Q in LGBTQ stand for anyhow (questioning or queer)? And is “queer” the umbrella term this community seeks? If so, who’s left out in the rain? How exclusive is inclusivity these days? And let’s get this right out there: While sliding the L in front of the G may have been a move to make sure the lesbians were not forgotten, the lesbians are not to blame for this hyperbolic letter confusion of sorts. Here’s the elevator speech: The GLBT or LGBTQ or LGBTQQI2A or (Wikipedia endorsed heading) “LGBT” community (phew, why can’t I just say “gay community” again?) is in tension with itself. The cultural climate is betwixt and between the triumphs of marriage equality and a community’s bewilderment with the arrangement of letters and a struggle to gather under an umbrella term of sorts. There is an obvious divide between those who are for the umbrella term, queer, and those who are not. No surprise, those who oppose the term are mostly over the age of 35, as the word “queer” pre-late-80’s was wholly a pejorative term and still carries with it undesirable recollections for many. Besides, the pre-late-80s gay community was just that—“the gay community.” You were either gay or straight. Simple enough, right?

The “gay” community is, understandably, not inclusive enough, as those who identify as lesbian or bisexual, trans* or what-have-you, don’t feel fully integrated and equal (thus LGBT). Yet how inclusive can a community be when a socially persuasive medium like Facebook offers 50+ gender identifiers? Thus the

*LGBTQQI2A is an abbreviation used to represent a broad array of identities such as, but not limited to, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, questioning, intersex, two-spirited, and allies. This is not including the ambiguousness of “trans*” (note the asterisk, as a stand-in for the myriad of suffixes to follow trans—(transgendered, transsexual, transvestite, trans male, trans folk, etc.). The * is an invitation for all non-cisgender individuals to be shaded by an umbrella fashioned with a shift>8 stroke. Wait, but what about Pansexual, Asexual and Homosexual?

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rabbit hole of interpretation leads us to continually add letters so no one is left out, hence LGBT*QQI2A…. (How ‘bout Gay Lesbian Or Whatever? “GLOW” already has alliances on some college campuses).There’s even a letter for those of us who are straight—A for allies. (Or is that Asexual?) So, if I identify as an ally rather than straight, am I part of the community and under the proposed umbrella? I’m also cisgender —that is, my gender matches my biological sex (male). Is the community we speak of comprised of everyone who’s not a cisgender heterosexual?

Communities filter how individuals experience being. It is both our window into viewing the world and also the very blinds concealing our place within it. Community requires that some be left out in order for a collective identity to endure. An umbrella term establishes who we are because we’re not them. Therefore a community’s umbrella term allows one to let go of the desire to identify as this, that, or the other thing and provides space for anyone who is for the community betterment to unite as one — in this case, to foster civic justice, encourage social awareness, and to enjoy the pleasures of a well-done drag show every so often. While being gay may not be a choice, being part of a community certainly is. So perhaps an umbrella term is not only warranted in these ambivalently queer times, but also necessary for transformative progress and triumph to arise. A community should be able to identify itself before it can attempt to identify the issues it will fight and strive toward; hence the desire for this umbrella term. While there are many contemporary concerns to be addressed, the lack of an urgent issue (post marriage equality) allows this conversation to happen. If marriage equality in RI had not passed, the local community’s focus would not be on whether Q should go before or after the T or G or L, or if the Q should just stand-alone.

So this questioning of queerness finds itself in a peculiar position as conversation among letters—to add the Q or not add the Q, and if so, does one place it before or after the other letters—seems to be dividing a group more than uniting one. Bradford Greer’s declaration in the April edition of Options that “clearly [we] need to do more to rid our own community of our own internal prejudices” speaks directly to this “queering divide” of community members. I thought I was just ignorant for not knowing what to call the (still not sure)-community but I soon realized that most within it are similarly ambivalent on what to call us. Wait, I’m still not sure: a straight guy is allowed in—right? Again, how exclusive is inclusivity these days? But then again, the umbrella

Options | June 2014


term “queer” would only work contingent upon my exclusion. The community in question is united less by what it is and more by what it is not—and while the modern usage of “gay” is quite specific, “queer” is general yet also limiting as to what this community isn’t—it’s not straight. Because the simplest way to express what one is, at times, is by what one is not—i.e., “not straight.” That’s precisely what “queer” means: to be other than the norm. Straight is the norm. Queer is everything else. Straight is closed. Queer is open. And because “queer” is the most accurate and inclusive term for individuals who don’t identify with the norm, which is straight, it has taken the lead as an umbrella term (as much as it pains some older folks to hear). So, I’m not in? While visiting gay bars and drag shows, I started asking questions: How do you feel about the word queer? Are you a member of the gay community or the LGBTQQI2A community? Am I a member (I’ve got my Pride pin on)? Do I call Miss Kitty Litter he or she? What about when she’s at the urinal next to me? So in hopes of becoming a bit more informed (and hopefully, by intention a little less ignorant) about the community in question, I realized that most within it are just as confused as I am, as my questions only led me to more questioning. And so I’ve placed myself in a position of liminal oddities: to, for, and about whom am I writing? How many straight people reading this are asking similar questions? How many queer people reading this are asking similar questions? How many people care at all? Whoever you are, reading these pages, please, speak up and have a dance. Write us at Options. Ask questions! Questioning builds a way. Attend the drag shows; they are, in all seriousness, fabulous. Wait, did this article even answer any questions? It never really set out to do so. So, do we add the Q or not? I don’t know—I’m just the straight guy. L, B, G, T, Q, I D O N T G I V E A D A M N—Here is one thing I do know: this is a community of options and a community with pride. Now tell me you wouldn’t want to carry that umbrella around in all cultural climates.

PUCKER UP From their lips to your ears … Providence, RI was recently named the #4 gay-friendly destination in Travel + Leisure’s “America’s Favorite Cities” poll. The Advocate ranked the city #12 in their list of the Gayest Cities in America. From a romantic getaway to a fun weekend with friends, visit the city that people are buzzing about - lively, lovely Providence.

PROVIDENCE THE CREATIVE CAPITAL Providence Warwick Convention & Visitors Bureau 1.800.233.1636 | www.GoProvidence.com | info@GoProvidence.com

Take Pride Thanks to hundreds of committed donors, the Equity Action Fund has distributed nearly 100 grants totaling $600,000 to support LGBTQ youth, families, and individuals. Please join us in being a voice in the community by making a contribution today. Visit rifoundation.org and click on “Give Now.”

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Stand-Up Comedy After Sobriety Christina Thomas I’m a 38-year-old lesbian stand-up comedian who’s been in the military for 18 years. I started drinking 14 years ago. Now I am a grateful recovering alcoholic of eight months. I joined the Air Force at the age of 18. Following my sixyear enlistment, I discovered how freeing the life of a civilian was - not being told, when to eat, sleep, or go to the bathroom. This freedom brought me to using. I hit the bottle and never put it down. I’d always said that if I could do anything with my life, I would be a comedian. I knew how to make people laugh, but I honestly thought I would never muster the courage to get on stage, or find the right contacts to get started. After a two-year break from the military, I joined the Army National Guard. I deployed to Iraq for a year in 2005. Just after turning 30-yearsold, I came home very depressed and was having an internal struggle about being gay. My drinking got worse. I needed to be true to myself so I came out of the closet. For the first time I felt good in my own skin. A whole new world opened up to me and I was determined to get on stage and make people laugh. I found an open mic online in Newport in May 2008. Twenty friends came along with me, but when we got there the bartender said they no longer had an open mic night. I was so disappointed! The bartender felt bad, so she said, “Take the microphone and entertain us.” So I did. I was nervous as hell, and had no stage presence, but I was funny, or at least my friends thought so. That October I entered a contest at Catch a Rising Star at Twin River and made it to the semifinals. From there I started meeting people and getting more stage time. I was always in bars, and doing three to four open mics a week. Any money I made hosting would go right to booze. Sometimes I’d tell the same joke twice and wouldn’t remember. I thought I needed alcohol to relax, but it was making my comedy worse and people stopped calling me for gigs. I was

known as the “drunken comic,” and nobody took me seriously. So I decided to stop drinking before shows. That lasted for a while, but then I found myself not even wanting to get up on stage because I wanted to drink more than tell jokes. In February 2013 I decided I needed to change my life. I went to my first Narcotics Anonymous meeting because it was close by and I wanted to hear what “hard-core” drug addicts had to say, because I thought my problem wasn’t as bad. I quickly found that people were in this meeting for alcohol as well since alcohol is a drug. I went to that meeting once a week for six months. I kept drinking on and off until I hit bottom. I was in the middle of a stressful situation at work; I went through a rough break-up; I had to move; a lot of friends walked out of my life; and comedy was the last thing on my mind. I was depressed

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Options | June 2014


and alone. I felt there had to be a better way. In Narcotics Anonymous they tell you to take it one day at a time and this turned out to be the only way that I could remain sober. Depending on the person, it can be very overwhelming to think, "I can never have a drink again," but especially if you’re an alcoholic. By taking it a day, an hour, sometimes a minute at a time, I saw days turn into weeks, and weeks turn into months. I realized that I could stay sober. I loved comedy, but I had no idea how I would perform in a bar and not drink. So I took a few months off and decided that I wouldn’t go back on stage until I was ready. During my first few months back onstage, I would tell the booker to place me first or second in the lineup so I could immediately leave the bar after my performance. I spent a lot of time writing new material about recovering. I realized that once I got through the pain, I could make this experience funny. So I brought my sobriety to the stage. I realized that I loved comedy more now than ever. I was getting better and better and was offered more stage time. I earned my first feature spot as a sober comic. I was getting paid, so I needed to act like it was a job. I never showed up to my full-time job drunk, so why should comedy be any different? My sponsor was worried about me being around bars too much at first, but I told him I would be okay. I do about three shows a month now. I won’t go to bars to hang out, but

Options | June 2014

when I get booked for a show, I don’t care where it is – I’m sober and ready to bring on the funny. I started to get a high from being sober. Everything became clearer. I remembered all my lines on stage for the first time! A lot of comics have approached me in the past several months to ask how I manage to perform in bars without drinking. How could I not even be tempted? I just tell them that my sobriety came first, and once I knew I could walk into a room full of people who were drinking and not want to get loaded, that it was time for me to get back on stage. Sometimes it’s hard to be in a room full of drunks, but not because I want a drink; it’s because they actually start to annoy me now. But at least I’m on stage and can make jokes about them. My advice to any active comic trying to stay sober is this: If you can get on stage and not drink, then don't drink. If you know you can’t, then you have a problem and you need to find help. Addiction is a disease. Put yourself first and get the help you deserve. When the time is right to get back on stage you’ll know it. You will have more passion for comedy than you ever did when you were drinking. And you’ll actually have the presence of mind to notice funny things that happen in the audience and immediately make jokes out of them. Trust me, you don’t want to miss the lady in the back, falling off her chair, or the woman whose top fell down.

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Where do you find your LGBT Feminism in Rhode Island? Jodi Glass asks Sally Ann Hay new people. Over the years I have been saddened to realize how misunderstood “feminism” is. For a while there, we called it “the new ‘F’ word.” Some days you wondered which was more controversial: being a feminist or being a lesbian. J: How can we, as a community, keep feminism alive and thriving?

Jodi: When did you first identify as a feminist? Sally: Let’s see, I graduated from college in ’72 so it had to be about 1970, long before I came out to myself as a lesbian. I have an older sister who I loved and adored – still do! – and she sent me a copy of Sisterhood is Powerful, an anthology by Robin Morgan, and a subscription to Off Our Backs, a radical feminist periodical first published in 1970. I was hooked! J: How would you define feminism for you? S: Define feminism? Yikes! Back in the 1970’s, a feminist was a “woman-identified woman,” which meant we rejected patriarchal expectations of what it meant to be a woman or act like a woman, and we demanded equality with our male counterparts. It also meant we celebrated being a woman – absolutely not buying into the idea that being female was second best. With time, feminism expanded with the realization that men, especially gay men, suffered from gender stereotypes as well. Now we are recognizing transgender people are often greatly harmed by gender stereotyping. So I guess you could say that feminism is about celebrating individuality and rejecting gender-based expectations.

S: I have been saddened that the LGBT community hasn’t embraced feminism more widely. Sexism and an abhorrence of perceived “gender deviance” are at the heart of so much of the oppression experienced by our communities. As a feminist therapist, I tried to encourage my clients to adopt a feminist outlook although it wasn’t called that. I was helping them develop a healthier perspective on their own lives – one based in an acceptance and love for themselves and on the premise that they were the authorities in their own lives. So, to answer your question, I think we can keep feminism alive in our community by honoring our history and who we are, and not allowing ourselves to simply be assimilated. We need to be on the alert for sexist thinking and behaviors within ourselves as well as from others, and should continue to recognize, respect, support and celebrate our differences. We are a different people; that is the source of much of our strength. It would really be tragic if we were to lose that awareness.

JDHS PHOTOS

J: Where do you find feminism in Rhode Island today? S: For years I remained part of the Boston radical feminist movement. I was crushed when Bella Abzug said lesbians shouldn't be included in the women’s movement. I began working in RI in ’77, moved here in the early 80s, and was looking around for other feminists and really couldn't find any groups. It was very isolating. I missed the lesbian feminist community, especially the women’s music concerts, and kept going back up to Boston. I joined Options initially to find lesbian, and hopefully feminist, friends. I ended up making some wonderful gay male friends. (I think Options is more balanced these days.) Ultimately, I realized the best way to find community was through meeting

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Options | June 2014


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Frontrunners RI By the Frontrunners It’s 6pm on a Thursday night in Providence. A group is gathered at the north end of the Blackstone Boulevard path, trading warm greetings and chatting about the weather, the joys and pains of the week, and news of the day. They’re doctors and college professors, social workers and house painters, postal carriers and librarians, civil liberties advocates and artists. Collectively, they form Frontrunners Rhode Island, a group of LGBTQ runners and walkers who gather every week to traverse a few miles of the Boulevard and neighboring streets, followed by dinner at a local restaurant. Depending on the season, they’ll be either bundled up or wearing next to nothing. The club meets year-round, and its members share a dedication to fitness, good health and enduring friendship. On occasion, they’re joined by gay-friendly folks who simply enjoy the camaraderie. Everyone’s welcome. International Frontrunners has chapters all over the world, but the first club began in San Francisco in 1974. Inspired by Patricia Nell Warren’s The Front Runner - a controversial novel about a gay track coach and his openly gay protégé - the group has grown to include more than 100 chapters all over the world, from Providence to Paris. For many, the network of clubs means the assurance that, when traveling or moving to a new city, they’ll likely find a cohort of LGBTQ runners (or walkers, like our Providence club has), forge new ties and be made to feel at home on unfamiliar turf. Clubs can be found in almost all major cities around the globe, and in many mid-sized cities like Providence.

of the group varies, from a small number who regularly run five miles at a good clip along a beautiful route, following the Boulevard and River Road, to walkers and runners who prefer to stick to the path, covering two to four miles. Every year, the group runs the Cape Cod Marathon Relay, and they’ve placed well in the rankings, but not everyone is in it for the competition. Some just enjoy the chance to get fit with like-minded friends, whatever the pace. Becoming part of the group is easy. They have a Facebook page (FrontrunnersRhodeIsland), and they’re linked from the International Frontrunners website (www.frontrunners.org), where you can find contact information. You can also stop by their table at the Rhode Island PrideFest on Saturday, June 21, on the Providence waterfront. Perhaps the simplest way to join them for a run or walk is to show up on any given Thursday at 6pm, where the Blackstone path meets Hope Street. Just look for the friendliest people around, ready to elevate heart rates with a little conversation thrown in for good measure. Frontrunners Rhode Island meets every Thursday at 6pm at the north end of the Blackstone Boulevard Path. For more information, contact frontrunnersri@gmail.com

Frontrunners Rhode Island was re-started in September 1996 when an article by Glenn Amoroso, published in Options, led to a meeting at the Coffee Exchange where a group of eleven runners decided to revive the dormant group. Local runners Brian Patrick Mulligan and Deirdre Bird, both of whom have for years placed high in regional races, have continued to lead the group and organize races and other events. The pace

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Options | June 2014


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Freedom to Marry, Freedom to Divorce Carol Ricker, Esq. In August of 2013, Rhode Island became the tenth state to legalize marriage between same-gender partners. While many happy, committed couples celebrated by preparing their vows, many others were celebrating by preparing to divorce. Finally, with the freedom to marry, came the freedom to divorce. It is not widely known that in every state in our union, in all couples, whether same-gender or opposite sex, at least one person must be a resident of the state in which they wish to file for divorce.This requirement has historically presented problems for Rhode Island residents who were married in states that recognize same-gender marriage – primarily Massachusetts – and who subsequently wished to file for divorce. Because Rhode Island would not divorce same-gender couples, these spouses were faced with two options: stay married, or move to a state that recognizes same-gender marriage to meet the residency requirement before filing for divorce (normally one year). In most cases neither option is attractive, so many stayed married and lived in limbo. This problem resolved with the passage of marriage equality. If a party has been a Rhode Island resident for at least one year, that party is now free to file for divorce in Rhode Island.

which one or both parties allege behavior during the course of the marriage that resulted in the destruction of the marriage. This could include severe drug or alcohol problems, infidelity, physical and/or emotional abuse, and abandonment. The party making these allegations must prove them through evidence and testimony. If the court finds such extreme fault on the part of one party, the court may divide the marital estate in a way that compensates the non-fault party. As in a no-fault divorce, there is a divorce hearing, and 90 days after the hearing, the final judgment of divorce is usually entered. Lastly, a divorce may be granted on the grounds that the parties have lived “separate and apart” for more than three years if the court finds this to be true. Such a separation period is evidence of the breakdown of the marriage. In this type of action there is a divorce hearing, but rather than the 90-day waiting period, the final judgment of divorce can be entered after 30 days. Marriage equality in Rhode Island is a great step forward, not only for residents who wish to join their lives together, but also for those who wish to move on and start anew.

Divorce in Rhode Island is granted on several grounds, most commonly filed for “irreconcilable differences.” Essentially, this means that the parties have experienced differences such as lifestyles, communication problems and/or financial problems, and have grown apart. This type of divorce action is considered a “no-fault” divorce where the marital estate comprised of all the assets and debts acquired during the course of the marriage will, for the most part, be divided equally between the parties. The parties attend a court hearing and 90 days after the hearing the final judgment of divorce is usually entered. A second form of divorce filing is a “fault-based” divorce in

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Trans* Health Care Challenges AJ Metthe, TGI Network Over the last several years, as I slowly began disclosing my transgender identity to others, my self-confidence grew. Whatever the outcome, there was always a sense of relief. My own social and medical transition, in addition to my experience getting to know other trans* people, brings me both joy and anger. I am an out and proud trans* man but I have also hit many roadblocks on my journey. Finding trans-knowledgeable physicians and accessing health insurance benefits has been a challenge. Thankfully, 2014 has already brought with it many positive changes, including Dr. Michelle Forcier opening up her clinic to trans* people of all ages. Lt. Governor Elizabeth Roberts hosted two important community meetings – one with providers and the other with trans* folks – toward better infrastructure to access healthcare. Insurance exclusions for transition-related medical expenses is a significant roadblock. One major misconception is that medical treatment for gender dysphoria is merely “cosmetic” or “experimental.” However, all the major professional medical, social work, and psychological associations in the U.S. support the medical necessity of transgender people to access healthcare. In 2008, the American Medical Association adopted a resolution “in support of public and private health insurance coverage for treatment of gender-identity disorder as recommended by the patient’s physician.” Still, most health insurance companies deny any and all medical claims related to transition, making the process unaffordable for many trans* people who know this is a necessary step for their well-being. There are a number of ways that cisgender allies can help their transgender friends. (I am not talking about what to say/ what not to say to a trans* person, although this is an important topic for another article.) Pay close attention to patient forms in the offices of medical, mental health, and social service providers. Does the form ask for both a legal and preferred name? Does it include more than two gender options? Consider asking them to change the form to be more inclusive of the broad spectrum of gender identity. Consider writing a letter to Rhode Island’s Office of the Health Insurance Commissioner requesting they clarify health insurance regulations, citing both the state’s nondiscrimination clause that includes gender identity and expression and Section 1557 of the federal Affordable Care Act, which outlines nondiscrimination protections in health insurance. Advocate for gender-neutral public restrooms. Speak with business owners about the importance of being inclusive of the needs of trans* patrons. We continue to experience harassment, employment and housing discrimination, and have higher rates of unemployment, suicide, and homelessness. Bring us into your network for better chances at obtaining employment and include our voices at larger LGBT community events.

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Most importantly, listen and try to understand where we are coming from and challenge gender stereotypes in your daily life. Most of us – gay or straight – challenge traditional gender stereoypes to some extent. Practice noticing when you find yourself going against what a stereotypical man or woman is supposed to be or do in a situation. Sit with that feeling and recognize that gender (even your own!) can be fluid and flexible. As another LGBT Pride month comes along, I am happy to be a part of celebrating with the larger LGBT community. Please remember that our work is not done. Someday I hope that the biggest annual gathering of transgender folks is not the Transgender Day of Remembrance, when we mourn those we’ve lost, but rather a celebration of our lives as we grow old together. My hope is that you, too, will be there to share in our joy. TGI Network of Rhode Island is the only statewide organization providing support, advocacy and education for the transgender, gender-variant, and intersex community. Incorporated in 2011, our mission is to be a resource for TGI people navigating their lives and the medical and legal systems; to serve as a resource for professionals working with TGI people; and to serve as a liaison between the TGI and LGB communities and the community at large. Visit us at www.tginetwork.org. Trans* is an all encompassing term that includes anyone who identifies with a gender that differs from the sex they were assigned at birth.

Options | June 2014


WE’RE IN THIS

TOGETHER

We’re proud to sponsor the 2014 RI Pride Celebration because serving and supporting the diverse healthcare needs of our members is what we’re all about. And by promoting a diverse and inclusive workplace, we’re better able to deliver on our promise of improving the health of all Rhode Islanders— including YOU!

Blue Cross & Blue Shield of Rhode Island is an independent licensee of the Blue Cross and Blue Shield Association. 03/14

Options | June 2014

HR-14908

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Youth Pride, Inc. Ethan Kennedy At Youth Pride, Inc. (YPI) we strive to meet the unique and ongoing needs of youth and young adults impacted by sexual orientation and gender identity/expression in Rhode Island. We strive to make sure that the experiences and opinions of youth at YPI are central in directing our work. With that in mind, when Options asked us the question, “What are the biggest issues facing LGBTQQ youth in Rhode Island, and what can adults do to provide support?” we turned to the youth to ask them to speak about what their needs are and how we, as adults, can best support them. An overarching theme that emerged out of the discussions was the need to create safer spaces for LGBTQQ youth. Youth mentioned issues such as lack of information (especially accurate and positive information about LGBTQQ people and issues in school), lack of access to affordable and trans*-competent healthcare, lack of accessible homeless shelters, lack of visible role models, and bullying as obstacles to feeling supported and able to freely express themselves. Their suggestions as to how adults can help support LGBTQQ youth are very straightforward. First, adults can educate themselves on LGBTQQ issues. Then use that

knowledge to talk openly about issues related to gender and sexuality. All of the youth we spoke to expressed a desire to have discussions with the adults in their lives about these topics. Finally, adults can take action. Whether it be intervening when you see bullying taking place, lobbying for legislation, incorporating LGBTQQ themes into your curriculum, or enacting trans*-inclusive policies in your organization, youth need the support of adults. “I tend to feel alone in most local settings, especially school, where there is simply not a lot of LGBTQ visibility. I really want older friends, teachers, and mentors to be willing to talk openly about LGBTQ issues. I also think it's important, too, for LGBTQ adults to be willing to talk about their own experiences.” – E., age 21. “Work together to create a homeless shelter for LGTBQ youth. Work with state officials and medical professionals so who there are doctors that trans* youth can access if they don't have insurance. Fight for those youth who are lucky enough to have insurance but have to fight with insurance to cover their medically necessary treatment. Fight like hell and let us know we're not alone and that it does get better.” S., age 22.

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“One of the issues that the LGBTQ community has is the lack of education about their community in our school system regarding health, relations, and culture. The adults can just talk about it all the time. Talk about the LGBTQ community like it's normal. Tell the LGBTQ youth and their allies about the things that our schools, and our media, don't talk about. Give facts, and assure them that they can talk about the community and stop all of the stereotyping and myths.” – M., age 19. “Despite the bravery of LGBTQ youth, our voices can't be heard everywhere. We need adults to help carry the torch, be our voice when we're silenced, be the strong support we need to grow and continue the fight.” – H., age 18. Making a large impact in the lives of LGBTQQ youth must involve members of the community at all levels. If you or your organization is interested in expanding your knowledge base and capacity to better serve LGBTQQ youth, YPI is available to facilitate trainings and workshops on a variety of LGBTQQ related topics. Visit www.youthprideri.org. * Trans*is an all-encompassing term that includes anyone who identifies with a gender different from the sex they were assigned at birth.

HAPPY PRIDE!

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SAGE/RI Sally Ann Hay Got Pride? What a year it has been! We saw our membership grow to the highest level it has been in years. Membership events were fun and well attended.The number of requests for presentations and trainings around SAGE and LGBT elders exploded, leading us to conversations with students from high schools, colleges and medical programs; with nurses, social workers and other health care professionals; with the leadership team of a large extended care facility; with mental health center staff members; with our allies within the LGBT community; and with politicians and policy makers. We came to realize that interest in LGBT elder housing is very high in RI and that the challenges of bringing housing proposals to fruition are formidable. We participated in the creation of the LGBT Elder Care Subcommittee, bringing together leaders from all aspects of long term care in Rhode Island with representatives from SAGE/RI and other allies. Off to a good start, this committee is positioned to make a positive change in the experience of older (and younger!) LGBT Rhode Islanders when they seek services from these facilities. A final highlight of the past year was the success of RI’s first ever LGBT Health Fair. The Fair was so successful last year (what a blast to be celebrating our marvelous selves in the State House rotunda on the heels of the Equal Marriage victory) that we are finalizing plans for the 2014 LGBT Health Fair as this issue of Options is going to press. We are proud of our past year and hope you’ll stop by the SAGE/RI booth at PrideFest to talk with us about the coming year! What We Are Learning Did you know that “sexual orientation, gender identity and gender expression” are NOT included in the anti-discrimination legislation that covers licensed health-care facilities in Rhode Island? Well, neither did we. We’re working on this issue with the LGBT Elder Care Subcommittee. We’ve also been learning about how many well-meaning health care providers and

leaders believe they don’t need to learn about LGBT sensitivity and cultural competency because they “don’t have any LGBT residents [or patients],” and/or because they “treat everyone the same.” When we are able to talk with these people, we usually find they are open to corrective information and quickly shift their understanding about the importance of being proactive when reaching out to LGBT people. We’re getting the message: There is a real need for SAGE/ RI.We continue to hear from members of the LGBT community as well as from the mainstream that SAGE has an important role to play in improving life today and in the future for RI’s LGBT elders. Our biggest challenge has been realizing that even a hearty band of dedicated and hard-working volunteers is not enough to keep an organization like SAGE/RI alive and thriving. We’ve been on the lookout for an Executive Director but know we need funding to hire such a person… and we are learning that you need paid staff to be seen as credible when applying for larger grants - a major catch-22. The Year Ahead We are committed to increasing the visibility and the quality of life of RI’s LGBT older adults – why not join us? If you don’t share our concerns today, you are likely to someday in the future! SAGE/RI (Services & Advocacy for GLBT Elders) addresses issues of concern to LGBT elders and is an organization of diverse people of all ages. For information on programs or to join SAGE/ RI, drop us a line at sageriinfo@gmail.com; leave us a message at 528-3259; write to us at 235 Promenade Street, Suite 500, Box 18, Providence, RI, 02908; or find us on Facebook at SAGE/Rhode Island.

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Resources

Options originated in 1982 as the offical newsletter of the Rhode Island Gay Task Force. Editor Jos Fayette explained, “The RIGTF wants to make the homosexual community aware of their options as gay men and women in Rhode Island. And it’s only because we live, work, love and play in this state that there are such a large number of options available to all of us.” Options has always, and will continue to print LGBTQ resources so that you can, as Fayette went on to say, “Exercise your OPTIONS today to make positive changes in your life tomorrow.” Help us help you! Email info@optionsri.org if you come across a resource listing that needs updating. Phone numbers are in the 401 area code and addresses are in RI, unless noted. Addiction Support Groups AA Brothers in Sobriety: 372 Wayland Avenue, Providence. 751-9328. Saturday 7:30pm Alcohol/Drug Helpline: RI Council on Alcoholism & Drug Dependence. 24hr. (866) 252-3784 Gay Al-Anon: Tuesday 7:30pm. Park Place Congregational UCC, 71 Park Place, Pawtucket. 726-2800 RI LGBT AA Group: Anchor Recovery Center, 249 Main Street, Pawtucket. Tuesdays 7pm Set Them Free: Narcotics Anonymous open discussion group. Meets Wednesdays 7:30-9pm. Anchor Recovery Community Center, 249 Main Street, Pawtucket. 721-5100. www.anchorrecovery.org. info@anchorrecovery.org AIDS/Health Resources AIDS Care Ocean State: Confidential HIV & HEP C testing (call 781-0665 to schedule an appointment), safer-sex supplies, case management, emergency funds, clinical services, assisted and supportive housing for people living with HIV/AIDS, street outreach, ENCORE, HIV+ support groups, The Speaker’s Bureau. 18 Parkis Avenue, Providence. 521-3603. www.aidscareos.org AFIA Center for Health & Wholeness: Meals, food pantry, HIV support groups, recovery groups, recreational and social activities. Sponsored by AIDS Project RI. Free to clients. Wednesday & Thursday 12-3pm. Matthewson Street Church, 134 Matthewson Street, Providence. Contact Gordon Cooper. 331-1350 ext. 3268. coopergo@familyserviceofri.org AGAPE/Family Resources Community Action: Case management, support, personal care items for people living with HIV/AIDS in northern Rhode Island. 245 Main Street,Woonsocket. 235-6092. lcohen@famresri.org AIDS Action Hotline: MA only. (800) 235-2331 www.aac.org AIDS Project RI: Division of Family Service of RI. Case management, buddies, COBRA and dental services, emergency fund, mental health counseling, nutrition support, assessment and referral, wellness programs, advocacy, strength training, prevention education, HIV testing. 9 Pleasant Street, Providence. 831-5522 www.aidsprojectri.org

AIDS Quilt RI: Displays local AIDS memorial quilt panels, panelmaking programs including Anna’s Workshop, HIV/AIDS education for young people. PO Box 2591, Newport, RI 02840. 434-4880. annasworkshop@aidsquiltri.org. www.aidsquiltri.org. Brown University AIDS Program: Clinical trials, public policy, research, lectures, conferences, patient and community education. 863-6790. brunap@brown.edu. brown.edu/Departments/BRUNAP Chiropractic Services: Free for unemployed HIV+ patients. Ronald P. Marsh, D.C., 11 King Charles Drive, Portsmouth. 683-1941 Comprehensive Community Action Programs: Medical, mental health, dental, social services, LGBT outreach. 311 Doric Avenue, Cranston. Also Coventry and Warwick. Contact Sarah Bowman. 467-9610. www.comcap.org Crossroads RI Health Care Services: Free, confidential, anonymous HIV counseling and testing for homeless/at risk. Monday & Wednesday 1-3pm. Contact Gloria. 521-2255, ext. 325. 160 Broad Street, Providence. Gabriel Care, LLC: Nursing/social worker case management and financial compensation for assistance and supervision for those living with HIV. MassHealth funded for MA residents. Contact Michael. (508) 678-1002. 376 South Main Street, Fall River, MA. HIV Antibody Testing: Anonymous. RI Department of Health. Providence, Newport and other locations. Free or sliding scale. 222-2320 Home and Hospice Care of RI: Medical care management for HIV/ AIDS. 24hr nursing staff for treatment. Referrals: 782-0725. Bereavement groups: Contact John Charette. 727-7079. Main Office: 415-4200 or tollfree 800-338-6555. 1085 North Main Street, Providence. www.hhcri.org House of Compassion: HIV/AIDS housing. 2510 Mendon Road, Cumberland. 658-3992 LGBT Caregiver Online Support Group: For LGBTs caring for someone with chronic health problems. www.caregiver.org Luis E. Martinez House CHS, Inc.: Supportive, permanent housing for 10 adults living with HIV/AIDS and/or substance abuse. New Bedford, MA. Contact Joe Taylor. (508) 984-7514 Partners in Learning About AIDS: Outreach to minorities, women of color and LGBT community at clubs and other locations. North Providence office provides free condoms and information about STIs and post-exposure prophylaxis for HIV. 1006 Charles Street, Suite 5, North Providence. 484-7523. info@plaidsproject.org. www.plaidsproject.org Project Empower: Wellness program for gay, bi and questioning men in south coast MA. Info on HIV/STD test sites and safe sex, social/ support groups, therapists and health care referrals . (508) 828-6692. Project Weber: Services for male sex workers. Drop-in center, support groups, HIV and Hep C testing, clean needles. www.facebook.com/projectweber. www.projectweber.org SSTAR (Stanley Street Treatment & Resources): Counseling, drug treatment, detox, domestic violence programs, free and confidential HIV, HEP C and STD testing, education, case management and support. Main location: 386 Stanley Street, Fall River, MA. (508) 679-5222. Project Aware (HIV/HCV). (508) 324-3561. Family Healthcare Center (508) 675-1054. MA and RI locations. www.sstar.org

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Steppingstone, Inc.: Medical case management program. One-on-one peer support in Somerset to Wareham area. Free and open to any HIV+ person 18+. Second Wednesday 6-7pm. First Baptist Church of Fall River, Kay Conference Room, 228 North Main Street, Fall River, MA. Third Wednesday 10-11am. 5 Dover Street, New Bedford, MA. www.steppingstoneinc.org Tranquil Mind & Wellness: Counseling, alternative healing, yoga, Pilates, meditation.109 Rhode Island Road, Lakeville, MA. (508) 947-1683. www.tranquilmind.net Thundermist Health Center: Provides HIV/AIDS services including medical care and treatment by an HIV specialist, dental care, behavioral health counseling, nutritional assessment and counseling, pharmacy consultation, free and confidential HIV testing. 450 Clinton Street, Woonsocket. Contact Philip Kane. 767-4100 ext. 3516 Information/Education The Center for Sexual Pleasure & Health: Education, pleasure, health, advocacy. Thursday-Saturday 12-6pm and by appointment. 250 Main Street, Unit 1, Pawtucket. 489-5513. www.thecsph.org Fenway Gay and Lesbian Helpline: Support, information and referrals. Fenway Community Health Center, Boston. Open daily 6-11pm. (617) 267-9001 or 888-340-4528 GLBT National Help Center Hotline:Local resources nationwide provided by social services agency. 888-843-4564. www.glbtnationalhelpcenter.org Newport Out: LGBT website for Newport. www.newportout.com RILGBT-NEWS: Low-volume email distribution list for LGBT & AIDS news from RI. Not a discussion list. To subscribe: tinawood@cox.net United Way of RI Referral Line: 2-1-1

Nightlife The Alley Cat Providence: Downtown neighborhood bar. MondayThursday 3pm-1am, Friday 3pm-2am, Saturday 2pm-2am, Sunday 2pm-1am. 17 Snow Street, Providence. 272-6369 Bobby’s Place: Dancing, pool, video lounge, karaoke. Monday-Thursday 5pm-1am, Friday 5pm-2am, Saturday 2pm-2am, Sunday 2pm-1am. 62 Weir Street,Taunton, MA. (508) 824-9997. www.bobbysplacema.com Brooklyn Coffee Tea House: Special events space, film screenings and other public and private events. Open mic first and third Saturday. 209 Douglas Avenue, Providence. 521-2095. www.brooklyncoffeeteahouse.com Club Body Center: Gay men’s sauna. Membership required. Oneday pass available. Open 24hr. 257 Weybosset Street, Providence. 274-0298. www.clubbodycenter.com The Dark Lady: Downtown bar and nightclub.Tuesday-Thursday 9pm1am, Friday & Saturday 9pm-3am, Sunday 9pm-1am. 17 Snow Street, Providence. 272-6369 DeVille’s: Lesbian, gay, straight, it’s all good. Wednesday through Friday 5pm-close, Saturday & Sunday 4pm-close. 345 South Water Street, Providence. 383-8883. www.devillespvd.com EGO: Providence’s newest gay nightlife performance/event space. Sunday and Thursday 9pm-1am, Friday and Saturday 10pm-3am, 73 Richmond St, Providence. 383-1208. www.egopvd.com Mirabar: Downtown bar and nightclub. Monday-Thursday 3pm-1am, Friday and Saturday 3pm-2am, Sunday 3pm-1am. 15 Elbow Street, Providence. 331-6761. www.mirabar.com Providence Eagle: Leather, Levi, bear cruise bar. Monday-Thursday 2pm-1am, Friday 2pm-2am, Saturday-Sunday 12pm-2am. 124 Snow Street, Providence. 421-1447. facebook.com/Eagleprovidence The Stable: Downtown video bar. No cover. Monday-Thursday 2pm-

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RI Socialist Action: 952-5385. adgagneri@gmail.com. For Spanish: 351-3414. walsil@cox.net

T.W.I.S.T. Program Coffee Night: Coffee & light snacks served Thursday 7-9pm. 1287 Acushnet Avenue, New Bedford. 508-672-0378

Servicemembers Legal Defense Network: Serving LGBT military personnel and veterans. PO Box 65301, Washington DC, 20035. (202) 328-3244. Toll-free hotline 800-538-7418. sldn@sldn.org. www.sldn.org

Political & Legal Groups American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU): 128 Dorrance Street, Suite 220, Providence. 831-7171. riaclu.org Amnesty International OUTfront: Program to campaign globally for LGBTIQ human rights. 212-807-8400. Cvohs18904@yahoo.com. www.amnestyusa.org Brown University Queer Alliance: Student advocacy and support organization. queer@brown.edu. facebook.com/BrownQueerAlliance Gay & Lesbian Advocates & Defenders (GLAD): LGBT/HIV legal info hotline. Weekdays 1:30-4:30pm. (800) 455-GLAD. 30 Winter Street, Suite 800, Boston, MA. www.GLAD.org Green Party of RI: PO Box 1151, Providence, RI 02906. www.greens.org/ri Lambda Legal Defense & Education Fund: 120 Wall Street, Suite 1500, NY. (212) 809-8585 Lawyers for Equality and Diversity (LEAD): Advocates for LGBT causes. lawyersforequality@gmail.com The Next Thing (TNT): Political and support group for queer people of color located at Brown University. 863-3062. tnt@brown.edu RI Commission on Prejudice and Bias: Hate crime awareness training program. www.hatecrimeri.org RI Human Rights Commission: Anti-discrimination law enforcement agency with jurisdiction in employment, housing, public accommodations and credit. 180 Westminster Street, 3rd floor, Providence. 222-2662. TDD: 222-2664 richr.ri.gov

Options | June 2014

Straight But Not Narrow Coalition: Straight supporters. PO Box 2591, Newport, RI 02840. 847-7637 Religious & Spiritual All Saints Memorial Church: 674 Westminster Street, Providence. 751-1747. asmcri@verizon.net. www.allsaintsmemorial.org Amicable Congregational Church: UCC. Open & Affirming. Pastor William Sterrett. Sunday 10am. 3736 Main Road, Tiverton. 624-4611. amicablechurch@aol.com www.amicablechurch.org. Association of Welcoming & Affirming Baptists: mail@wabaptists.org www.awab.org Barrington Congregational Church: UCC. “The white church.” 461 County Road, Barrington. 246-0111. www.bccucc.org Bell Street Chapel: Unitarian Universalist. A welcoming congregation. Rev. Ann Willever. 5 Bell Street, Providence. 273-5678. www.bellstreetchapel.org Beneficent Congregational Church: UCC. An Open & Affirming congregation in the heart of Providence. Co-Pastors Todd & Nicole Yonkman. Sundays 10am. 300 Weybosset Street, Providence. 331-9844. www.beneficentchurch.org Berean Baptist Church: A safe and welcoming place for all God’s children. Sunday 10am. 474 Chapel Street, Harrisville. 568-5411. bereanbaptist@verizon.net. www.bereanri.org

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Calvary United Methodist Church of Middletown: LGBTQ early dementia support group. Contact Amy. 200 Turner Road, Middletown. 847-6181 www.middletownmethodist.com Central Congregational Church: UCC. An Opening & Affirming Congregation. Sundays 10:30am. 296 Angell Street, Providence. 331-1960. www.centralchurch.us Channing Memorial Church: Unitarian Universalist. A Welcoming Congregation. 135 Pelham Street, Newport. 846-0643. www.channingchurch.org Charter Oak Grove ADF: An Open and Welcoming Congregation of Neo-pagan Druids in CT. charteroakadf@gmail.com. www.charteroakadf.org Christ Church in Lonsdale: Episcopal. 1643 Lonsdale Avenue, Lincoln. Services 8am and 10:30am. 725-1920. www.christchurchlincoln.org Church of the Epiphany: A diverse Open & Affirming Episcopal congregation. 1336 Pawtucket Avenue, Rumford. 434-5012. www.epiphanyep.org Church of the Holy Paraclete: Independent Old Catholic. Fr. Jakob Lazarus. Sunday 6pm. 155 Douglas Avenue, Providence. 218-0706. www.holyparaclete.org Edgewood Congregational Church: UCC. Open & Affirming. Service 10am. 1788 Broad Street, Cranston. 461-1344. www.edgewoodchurchri.org Emmanuel Episcopal Church: 120 Nate Whipple Highway, Cumberland. 658-1506 www.emmanuelri.org First Congregational Church in Bristol: An Open and Affirming Congregation. Pastor Dan Randall. 281 High Street, Bristol. 253-7288 www.fccbristol.org First Unitarian Church: A welcoming congregation. Sunday 10:30am. One Benevolent Street, Providence. 421-7970 www.firstunitarianprov.org

First Unitarian Church: Service 11am. 71 8th Street, New Bedford, MA. (508) 994-9686. www.uunewbedford.org First Universalist Society: UU. Welcoming congregation. Samegender weddings. 262 Chestnut Street, Franklin, MA. (508) 528-5348. fusf@verizon.net. www.fusf.org Foxboro Universalist Church: UUA. Service 10am. 6 Bird Street, Foxboro, MA. 508-543-4002. www.uufoxborough.org Grace Episcopal Church in Providence: 175 Mathewson Street, Providence. 331-3225. www.gracechurchprovidence.org Immanuel Lutheran Church: A Reconciling in Christ congregation. Pastor Sandra Demmler D’Amico. 647 North Main Street, Attleboro, MA. (508) 222-2898. www.immanuellc.org Interweave at Channing Memorial UU Church: A membership organization for the spiritual, political and social well-being of LGBTQ persons, and their allies, confronting oppression. 135 Pelham Street, Newport. 846-0643 Mathewson St. Church: United Methodist. 134 Mathewson Street, Providence. 331-8900. facebook.com/MathewsonStreetUMC Meditation: Gay men’s meditation experience. Relax and connect. Fee applies. Third Tuesday. Cranston. 7-8pm. 944-0723 Mercy of God Community: Christian, inclusive religious order. www.mgc.org Murray Unitarian Universalist Church: Marriage and commitment ceremonies for all. Rev. Bob McKetchnie. 505 North Main Street, Attleboro, MA. (508) 222-0505 www.murrayuuchurch.org Newman Congregational Church: Open & Affirming. 100 Newman Avenue, Rumford. 434-4742. www.newmanucc.org Newport Congregational Church: UCC. Open & Affirming. Rev. Hayes and Rev. Baker. 73 Pelham Street, Newport. 849-2238. www.newportcongregationalchurch.org

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Park Place Congregational Church: 71 Park Place, Pawtucket. 726-2800. www.parkplaceucc.com The Pub Church: A church that meets in a pub! Open & Affirming. Location may change. Saturday. 5pm. The Dugout, 722 Commonwealth Avenue, Boston, MA. thepubchurch@gmail.com www.facebook.com/ThePubChurchBoston Pilgrim Lutheran Church: An inclusive congregation. 1817 Warwick Avenue, Warwick. 739-2937 pilgrimlutheranri.jimdo.com Pilgrim United Church of Christ: Open and Affirming. 635 Purchase Street, New Bedford. 508-997-9086 Riverside Church: UCC.15 Oak Avenue, Riverside. Service 10am. 433-2039. www.rcc-ucc.com St. Augustine’s Church and Episcopal Center at URI: 15 Lower College Road, Kingston. 783-2153. staugustineuri.org St. James Church: Episcopal. 474 Fruit Hill Avenue, North Providence. 353-2079 St. Martin’s Episcopal Church: 50 Orchard Street, Providence. 7512141. www.stmartinsprov.org St. Martin’s Episcopal Church: Welcoming Church. Monthly LGBT Eucharist. 136 Rivet Street, New Bedford, MA. (508) 994-8972. stmartins1887@comcast.com www.stmartinsma.org St. Paul’s Episcopal Church: 50 Park Place, Pawtucket. 728-4300. www.stpaulspawtucket.org

Second Congregational Church of Attleboro: UCC. Open & Affirming. 50 Park Street, Attleboro, MA. Sunday 10am. (508) 222-4677. www.attleborosecondchurch.org Seekonk Congregational Church: Rev. Joy Utter. 600 Fall River Avenue, Seekonk, MA. (508) 336-9355. www.scc-ucc.com Soka Gakkai: Buddhist association for peace, culture, and education. Contact for weekly meetings in Providence. 930 Commonwealth Avenue, Boston. (617) 264-2000. Providence contact: adrienne.r.landau@gmail.com. www.sgi-usa.org Temple Agudas Achim: Reconstructionist congrgation. Rabbi Elyse Wechterman. 901 North Main Street, Attleboro, MA. (508) 222-2243. www.agudasma.org Temple Beth-El: Rabbi Sarah E. Mack. 70 Orchard Avenue, Providence. 331-6070. www.temple-beth-el.org Temple Emanu-El: 99 Taft Avenue, Providence. A welcoming conservative congregation. Rabbi Wayne Franklin. 331-1616. www.teprov.org Temple Habonim: A warm, welcoming Reform congregation. Rabbi Andrew Klein. 165 New Meadow Road, Barrington. 245-6536. www.templehabonim.org Temple Sinai: A welcoming Reform temple. Rabbi Peter Stein, 30 Hagen Avenue, Cranston. 942-8350. www.templesinairi.org

St. Paul’s Church: A welcoming Episcopal church. 2679 East Main Street, Portsmouth. 862-1466. stpaulsportsmouthri.org

Unitarian Church in Fall River: Sunday 10:30am. 309 North Main Street, Fall River, MA. 508-678-9700. office@unitarianchurchfr.org. www.unitarianchurchfr.org

St. Peter & St. Andrew’s Episcopal Church: 25 Pomona Avenue, Providence. 272-9649. stpanda25@verizon.net. stpeters-standrews.org

Unitarian Universalist Society of Fairhaven (MA): Service 10:30am. 102 Green Street, Fairhaven, MA. (508) 992-7081. www.uufairhaven.org

Saint Therese Old Catholic Church: Open & Affirming. Fr. David Martins. Sunday 10:30am. 134 Mathewson Street, Providence. 680-9076. www.saintthereseocc.org

Unitarian Universalist Congregation of South County: 27 North Road, Peace Dale. 783-4170 or Val 789-7282. www.uusouthcountyri.org

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Westminster Unitarian Universalist Church: A UUA Welcoming Congregation. 119 Kenyon Avenue, East Greenwich. 884-5933. www.westminsteruu.org Social Organizations

Lesbian Writers Group: Writing exercises, support. No critiquing or workshopping. Free. Rochambeau Library, Russian or Computer room. 708 Hope Street, Providence. Monday 7-8:30pm

Bear Providence: Monthly social events for the bear community. www.bearprovidence.com Bisexual Resource Center: PO Box 170796, Boston MA. (617) 424-9595. www.biresource.net Biversity Boston: Mixed-gender social events for Boston and the surrounding area. www.biversity.org Boston Bisexual Women’s Network: Social activities including monthly brunches, coming out groups and quarterly newsletter “Bi Woman Quarterly.” www.biwomenboston.org Bears Ocean State (BOS): Informal e-group for gay & bisexual bearidentified and-affiliated men for friendly companionship. All welcome. groups.yahoo.com/group/bearsoceanstate Cape and Islands Gay & Straight Youth Alliance (CIGSYA): 56 Barnstable Road, Hyannis, MA. (508) 778-7744. www.cigsya.org COMMUNISONG: For unity through song. Non-performance monthly singing session. jlglass53@aol.com. www.communisong.net CORISMA: Potluck get-togethers for couples from RI and southeast MA. corismainfo@comcast.net. www.corismagroup.org Defenders/Providence: Leather/Levi club. Third Sunday. 6pm. PO Box 41153, Providence, RI 02940

Mixed Borders Gardening Group: Gardening and more. Monthly meetings, all welcome. Mixedborders@cox.net. www.MixedBorders.com

Gay Men’s Meditation Group: Fee applies. Third Thursday. 7-8pm. 225-8149 Imperial Court of RI at Providence: Drag and non-drag performers raise funds for local charities. First Monday. RI Pride Office,1005 Main Street, #1105, Pawtucket. All welcome. PO Box 6583, Providence, RI 02904. www.icriprov.org

Men’s Card Group: Contact John. 261-9715. johninprov@gmail.com

Opera Club: Last Sunday of each month at 1pm. Enjoy hearing and attending. Dave, BrettCornellpi4@aol.com Pawtuxet Pride: GLBTQ folks & friends in Pawtuxet Village (Cranston and beyond). 345-1264. EDZL@aol.com Providence Gay Men’s Chorus: New season rehearsals begin in January and August. Singers and non singing volunteers welcome. Monday 7-9:30pm. Beneficent Church, 300 Weybosset Street, Providence. www.provgmc.org Queer Book Club: Third Wednesday 7pm. Books on the Square, 471 Angell Street, Providence. queerbookclub@gmail.com Raging Grannies: Women “of a certain age” working toward a more peaceful, equitable society with song, humor & passion. Will sing for rallies & events. jlglass53@aol.com RI Association of Gay Professionals: Professional networking and philanthropy. 453-9276. gayprofessionalnetworkofri@gmail.com riagp.com RI Lesbian Social Club: Social gatherings for women. 272-2962. heylari@yahoo.com RI Parents Pride: Gay parents socializing together with their children. Contact Melanie. 464-2288. saphicangel120@yahoo.com RI Pride: Open house 4th Wednesdays. Festival & Parade 3rd Saturday in June. Mail: PO Box 1082, Providence, RI 02901. Office: 1005 Main Street #1105 Pawtucket. 467-2130. info@prideri.com. www.prideri.com RI Prime Timers: Social and networking group for gay and bisexual

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men 40 and older. Second Sunday. Contact Steve Kagan. 996-3010. Big Gay Al’s Duckpin BOWLING League: Proceeds benefit AIDS causes. Tuesday 6:30pm. 1463 Atwood Avenue, Town Hall Lanes, www.riprimetimers.org Johnston. Contact Frank Ferri. 831-6940. www.bgalbowling.com. RI Skeptics Society: Yearning to talk with someone rational? Refreshing www.townhalllanes.com discussion. Fourth Saturday. East Providence restaurant location. FLAG (For Lesbians and Gays) FOOTBALL: Boston-based www.meetup.com/skeptics-133/ recreational football club. Saturday mornings in the fall and spring. All RI Women’s Association: Lesbian social group. 21+. Dances & events. skill levels are encouraged to participate. www.flagflagfootball.com www.riwa.net SAGE/RI (Services & Advocacy for GLBT Elders): Advocacy, education RI/S.E. MA Flag FOOTBALL: Saturday 10am. All levels and genders and social events for LGBTQ seniors. 235 Promenade Street, Suite welcome. mbs1994ever@yahoo.com 500, Box 18, Providence, RI 02908. 528-3259. sageriinfo@gmail.com Boston Pride HOCKEY: (617) 937-5858 Ext. 7. SEMASSMEN: Social group for GBQ men of southeastern MA and RI www.bostonpridehockey.org to foster strong friendships. Semassmen-subscribe@yahoogroups.com. Rondeaus KICKBOXING: 272-5425. www.rondeauskickboxing.com rlevass@yahoo.com Main Street MARTIAL ARTS: Non-profit. Welcoming dojo and Trans Queer RI: Friendship, fun activities and support for transgender, queer community center. 1282 North Main Street, Providence. 274-7672. and like-minded people. Gatherings third Sunday. trans.queer.ri@gmail.com www.mainstma.org T.W.I.S.T. Project: Program for gay and bisexual men in Fall River/New Chiltern Mountain Club: OUTDOOR recreation club in New Bedford area. Drop-in center, referrals, condom distribution, social England. events@chiltern.org. www.chiltern.org groups. Coffee night Thursday 7-9pm. (508) 672-0378 Boston Gay ROWERS: Worldwide online community for gay and WomenRIsing: Feminist chorus. Director Nancy Rosenberg. lesbian rowers, coxies, coaches, and race officials. www.glrf.org Contact@womenrisingchorus.org. www.womenrisingchorus.org Boston Ironsides RUGBY Football Club: www.bostonironsides.org Yankee Lambda Car Club: Regional club for GLBT people interested Frontrunners Rhode Island RUNNING Group: Running and in vintage & specialty cars. www.yankeelcc.com walking group. Newcomers welcome. Thursday 6pm. Meet at the end Sports of Blackstone Boulevard at Hope Street, Providence. Contact Brian. PrideSports Boston: Network of twenty-plus gay sports leagues/ 751-7643. bripm@cox.net teams in Boston area. (617) 937-5858. www.pridesportsboston.com Frontrunners Boston RUNNING Group: Saturday morning walk/ Boston Gay BASKETBALL League: (617) 937-5858 ext. 2. run along the Charles River. 10am. Meet in front of Club Cafe, 209 www.bgbl.com Columbus Avenue, Boston, MA. www.frontrunnersboston.org RI GALA BOWLING: Sunday 6pm. East Providence Lanes, Newport OutRyders SKIING: New England’s largest gay and lesbian ski and Avenue, East Providence. Contact Bruce or Bill. 397-3803 or 828-5587. snowboard club. www.outryders.org Monday night women’s bowling league. Contact Pat. 451-2188

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Boston Strikers SOCCER Club: Non-profit social organization to learn and improve soccer skills in a relaxed, congenial environment (617) 937-5858 Ext. 9. www.bostonstrikers.com Renaissance City SOFTBALL League: New players and boosters always welcome. www.providencesoftball.org Beantown SOFTBALL League: Friendly competition. 27 teams in 4 divisions of play: competitive, intermediate, and two recreational. (617) 297-7490. www.beantownsoftball.com LANES (Liquid Assets New England SWIMMING): Fitness and/or competition. (617) 937-5858. www.swim-lanes.org TENNIS-4-All: Boston, MA area tennis organization. www.tennis4all.org Cambridge Boston VOLLEYBALL Association: Players of all skill levels welcome. (617) 633-2180. www.GayVolleyball.net Ocean State Pride VOLLEYBALL League: Adult co-ed indoor league following USVBA rules. No try-outs. Fee applies. Kent County YMCA, 900 Centerville Road, Warwick. ospvolleyball@gmail.com

COLAGE: Support and social activities for children of LGBT parents. Third Saturday 10:30am-12pm. Gordon School, East Providence. Coordinator Veronica Jutras. vjutras5@gmail.com. www.colage.org/colage-chapter/colage-rhode-island-chapter/ Fitchburg State College GLBT Alliance: Social support group for students. One-in-Ten and Friends. 978-665-3164. sfranzemn@fsc.edu Peer Listening Line: Youth-staffed hotline for GLBT youth. Support, info and referrals. 5-10pm. Fenway Community Health Center, Boston, MA. (617) 267-2535 or (800)-399-PEER S.A.F.E (Sexual Advocacy for Everyone): Roger Williams University LGBTQ & allies group. Weekly meeting in Intercultural Center. Speakers, social and awareness events. Pride week in April. saferwu03@gmail.com Salve Regina University – The Alliance: 100 Ochre Point Avenue, Newport. Contact: Mandy Hart. mandy.hart@salve.edu SeaQuel (Southeast Asian Queers United for Empowerment and Leadership): Bi-weekly Sunday meetings. 383-7450. SeaQuel@Prysm.us. myspace.com/seaQuel

East Coast WRESTLING Club: 467-6737. (617) 937-5858 ext. 6. S.H.E.P.A.R.D. (Stopping Homophobia, Eliminating Prejudices and ecwc@juno.com. www.eastcoastwrestlingclub.org Restoring Dignity): Providence College, 1 Cunningham Square, Students & Youth Providence. 865-1631. shepard@providence.edu Bristol Community College Gay/Straight Alliance (BCC/GSA): The Trevor Project: The only nationwide, around-the-clock crisis and Steven Camara, Advisor. 774-357-2391. BCC-H202, 777 Elsbree suicide prevention helpline for LGBT youth. Also offers social networks. Street, Fall River, MA (866)4-U-TREVOR (866-488-7386). thetrevorproject.org Brown University Queer Alliance: Umbrella organization at Brown University of RI Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Intersex, University for LGBTQ groups. 863-3062. queer@brown.edu or lgbtq@brown. Queer & Questioning (LGBTIQ2): Alumni association. 874-5808. edu gsimonelli@advance.uri.edu Bryant Pride: Bryant University Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual Student URI Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer Center: A cultural Association. 232-6389 department for students, faculty and staff. Florence Badejo. 874-2894 CCRI Triangle Alliance: Student & staff GLBTQ group meets on Youth Pride Inc./The Way Out: Support, education & advocacy for Flanagan and Liston campuses. 455-6065 LGBTQQ young people ages 13-23. Drop-in center at 743 Westminster

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Street, Providence. Monday-Thursday 12pm-8pm, Friday 4-8pm, Saturday 10am-5pm. The Way Out peer support group Tuesday 5pm. Gender Spectrum support group Tuesday 5:30pm. Ask about 14-and-under day. 421-5626. kerri@youthprideri.org. www.youthprideri.org Support Groups & Social Services Abuse Victims and Survivors: Support on phone for LGBTQ victims & survivors of partner abuse. Confidential peer-led groups. Hotline: (617) 742-4911. TTY: (617) 227-4911. Network/LaRed. advocate@tnlr.org Adoption Options: Non-sectarian help. Jewish Family Service, 959 North Main Street, Providence. Contact Betsy Alper. 331-5437. www.adoptionoptions.org Foster parents needed: Stipend, assistance, training provided by Family Resources Community Action. 766-0900, ext. 1213 www.famresri.org Foster parents needed: For newborn to age six. 276-4300. childrensfriendri.org

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Foster parents sought: Training, stipend, support provided for nurturing families. Family Service of RI. Contact Gregary Wright. 331-1350 ext. 3305 Behavioral health outpatient services: Fall River area. S.T.E.P.: (508) 235-1012. T.W.I.S.T.: (508) 672-0378 Blackstone Valley Advocacy Center: Offering resources for victims of domestic violence. 723-3057. www.bvadvocacycenter.org Compass: FTM trans info, support and social group. Boston first Thursday 7-9pm. compassftm@comcast.net. www.compassftm.org Crossroads RI Hotline: (800) 367-2700 Day One (Formerly Sexual Assault and Trauma Resource Center of RI): Counseling & legal aid for victims of sexual assault/abuse & incest. 24hr hotline. (800) 494-8100. 421-4100 www.dayoneri.org Domestic Violence Resource Center of South County: Support, court

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advocacy, counseling, safe home, info for women and men in abusive or controlling relationships. 24hr free and confidential helpline. 782-3990 or toll free 800-494-8100. www.dvrcsc.org Gay Fathers of Greater Boston: Support. outreach@gayfathersboston. org. www.gayfathersboston.org Gay Fathers Support Group: Rhode Island. Fee applies. Contact Tom Fronczak, LICSW. 431-2953. TJFronczak@aol.com Gay Men’s Domestic Violence Project: Support, info, shelter. (800) 8321901. 955 Massachusetts Avenue PMB 131, Cambridge, MA. www. glbtqdvp.org Gay Officers Action League/New England (GOAL/NE): Law enforcement officers (sworn & civilian), fire, rescue and publicly employed EMS. Confidential. P.O. Box 587, Boston, MA 02117. (617) 376-3612. info@goalne.org. www.goalne.org Gay Share: Coming Out? Gay men’s support group. No fee. Wednesday 7:30pm. Contact Tom or Mike. 369-9448. info@gayshare.org. www. gayshare.org Helpline for LGBT Youth: Trevor Helpline and social networks for crisis and suicide prevention. 24/7. (866) 4-U-Trevor HIV+ Gay Men’s Support Group: Refreshments served. AIDS Care Ocean State, 18 Parkis Avenue, Providence. 521-3603. New members contact Scott. 640-3108 Kathy’s Group: Free support group for lesbians with cancer or any life-threatening illness. Meets monthly in Providence. Partners and caregivers welcome. 888-5KATHYS Mantalk of S.E. Mass: Socializing and discussions for gay, bi and curious men. Confidential. Drug and alcohol-free. 18+. Taunton Thursday and New Bedford first Tuesday. 7-8:30pm. mantalksouthcoast@yahoo.com National Lesbian & Gay Journalists Assoc./New England: Works for fair and accurate media coverage of LGBT issues. info@nlgja.org www.nlgja.org

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Options | June 2014

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PFLAG (Parents, Families & Friends of Lesbians & Gays): Greater Providence chapter. Serves all of RI and southeastern MA. First Wednesday 6:45pm. Met School, 325 Public Street, Providence. 751-7571. pflagprovidence@verizon.net. www.pflagprovidence.org RI Coalition Against Domestic Violence: 24hr helpline: (800) 494-8100. 467-9940 RI Rainbow Support Group: For people with disabilities who identify as LGBTQ. Last Tuesday. 98 Rolfe Street, Cranston. 6-7:30pm. Contact Ken Renaud. 785-2100. RI Relay 711. Samaritans: 24hr hotline for suicidal, lonely, despairing, depressed. (800) 365-4044. 272-4044 (RI only). www.samaritansri.org Sexual Health Education & Advocacy Program: HIV, sexual wellness, domestic violence risk reduction. Free, confidential, bilingual (Spanish). No caller ID used. Calls blocked for safety. Contact Aida. 861-6191 ext. 121. amanduley@sojournerri.org

of their loved ones and to connect with other families. Second Monday 6:30-8:30pm. Providence. Location unpublished for privacy. partners@ tginetwork.org Trans Partners New England: Gives romantic partners of transgender people a confidential, safe space to explore the impact of a loved one’s gender identity on their relationships, and to connect with other loved ones of transgender people. First Wednesday 6:30-8:30pm. Providence. Location unpublished for privacy. partners@tginetwork.org TransYouth Family Allies: Support for gender-variant and transgender children ages 3-18. info@imatyfa.org. www.imatyfa.org Transgender American Veterans Association (TAVA): Growing organization to address the concerns of fair treatment of transgender veterans and active duty service members. www.tavausa.org Women’s Resource Center of Newport and Bristol Counties: Offering services to victims of domestic violence. 846-5263. www.wrcnbc.org

Sojourner House: Support, shelter, advocacy and information for people in abusive relationships. No caller ID used. Outgoing calls blocked for safety. 861-6191. www.sojournerri.org 24hr helpline 7653232.

Greater Providence Chapter

Families, Friends & Allies Giving Caring, Confidential Suppor�

Straight Spouses Group: For information on groups and online support. www.straightspouse.org TGI Network of RI: Support, advocacy for transgender, transsexual, gender-variant, genderqueer and/or intersex people. Borderlands peer group first and third Tuesday 7-9pm. info@tginetwork.org. www. tginetwork.org Transgender Support Group: Cape Cod (508) 362-4435

HELPLINE: (401) 751-7571

Parents, Families, Friends and Allies United with LGBT People to Move Equality Forward

www.PFLAGprovidence.org Email: PFLAGprovidence@gmail.com

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Worth a Look The Lit Chick Do you have a small child who's into parades? If so, This Day in June will be a great addition to your bookshelf. This story for kids ages four to eight, written by Gayle Pitman, PhD, and illustrated by Kristyna Litten, describes a Gay Pride celebration from a child’s perspective. With light, simple rhymes and colorful artwork--including same-gender couples, leather, drag queens, ladies with rainbow hair, and happy little dogs riding in sidecars--this book celebrates the diversity of families and the freedom of being who you are. It’s also a positive way

to introduce children to the diversity of the world around them. Published by Magination Press, the children’s book imprint of the American Psychological Association, This Day in June also includes a comprehensive reading guide for parents and teachers. If you go to PrideFest as a family, this book is a great way for kids to remember the fun of the parade, the colors, the spirit, and the people all year long. Order a copy online at Magination Press or at any major bookseller.

Songstress Kristen Ford, who plays Boston Pride this year, is striking a new chord with her latest album. “Dinosaur is an evolution for me,” says Ford. “I just hope the fans will enjoy it and we can share our common emotions. That to me is what music is all about.” Ford’s trademark sound is so eclectic that it’s difficult to categorize. Dinosaur is no exception. “I just want it to feel like the listener’s own private concert,” says Ford, who recorded the vocals and guitar parts together, in some cases with a huge band of rock instrumentation, strings, programmed beats and even a horn section. Ford’s smoky voice and slamming rock riffs will make you wish you were listening to her belt it out live. The album will hold you over until she returns to New England from touring in the fall. The album’s production was paid for in part by more than 130 Kickstarter supporters and the maximum award from the Iguana Music Fund, and Ford continues in that spirit. A portion of all album sales and 100% of downloads of the song "Hand Grenade" (one of my favorites) will go toward ALS (Lou Gehrig’s Disease) research. Order a CD or download the album at KristenFordMusic.com.

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Every Sunday night is a Kiki Lesbian Night at Lola's Cantina in Providence. House DJ team Reese and DJ Superior specialize in spinning the magic. Superior is a seasoned, full-time DJ and owner of Majik Entertainment. For the blue-haired Reese, a freelance graphic designer and owner of the Filth and Decay clothing company, music is a fun escape. "This night was created for lesbians by lesbians," says Reese. "We love music--anything goes," adds Superior. These DJs are open to requests, but you'll hear some of the newest tracks as well. Reese says she constantly scours blogs and forums to find the next big hit or remix. Kiki promoters Mia Giovannone and Brittany Lainhart bring in an 18+ crowd looking to end the weekend at Lola’s upstairs bar and riverside deck. The two also coordinate Kiki Takeovers around Providence and Boston. This year, you can bookend your Rhode Island Pride celebration at Lola's Friday night Pride Countdown and Sunday Pride Hangover Party. "The ladies need love, too," says Lainhart. "It's a party with everyone we know, and everyone else who wants to come."

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Monday-Friday 5-7 PM Half Price Small Plates, Cheese Fondue, and Chocolate Fondue PLUS, $5 BARTENDER SPECIALS! For more information, visit our website or follow us on Facebook. LOOSEN THE TIE, MELT THE STRESS.

(401) 865-6670 • 199 PROVIDENCE PLACE, PROVIDENCE, RI 02903 (617) 357-7007 • 76 ARLINGTON STREET, BOSTON, MA 02116 *Offer valid at this location only



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