ALL Things
zeit bites
What should I celebrate in August?
‘I barely got through every sickening page’
Classic Vegas novels reconsidered through Amazon’s one-star reviews
1. I’M HUNGRY!
Are you a baby?
Yes
National Goat Cheese Month
Yes
FEAR AND LOATHING IN LAS VEGAS by Hunter S. Thompson “Not one funny, humorous or interesting story at all …”
Do you like food extruded from goats?
NO NO
World Breastfeeding Week
Back to School Month
Panini Month
Aug. 1-7
THE COLD SIX THOUSAND by James Ellroy
Do you want dessert with that?
You like something different on your panini?
YES YES
Come on, live a little
NO
NO
National S’mores Day Aug. 10
National Catfish Month 2. I’M CONCERNED ABOUT THE STATE OF THE WORLD!
“I couldn’t shake the feeling that this whole book was written in a language I didn’t understand.”
Don’t know what extruded means?
National Water Quality Month
“I got to Page 347 where the following lines appear: ‘Slaves shook their chains. Slaves did the Shackle Shimmy Shake.’ I was not pleased with this nonsense …”
YES
LEAVING LAS VEGAS by John O’Brien
Tired of right wing domination?
NO
“Gosh, aren’t prostitutes and alcoholics so wonderful and clever?”
Are you Jenny McCarthy? YES
“See book. See me. See me throw book in trash.”
“I barely got through every sickening page …”
Smelled Lake Mead recently?
NO
still good to know!
YES
Int’l Lefthander’s Day
NO
Aug. 13
National Immunization Awareness Month
Is that because your nose is cold and damp?
Bad Poetry Day Aug. 18
Is all this just too much for you?
YES
National Simplify Your Life Week Aug. 1-7
Well, it's about to get verse!
NO
NO
YES
Work Like a Dog Day Aug. 5 *All holidays confirmed by the Internets!
FOOLS DIE by Mario Puzo “Tedious, arid, banal, boring, bromidic, insipid, lifeless, random, tangential, vapid, pointless, plotless minutia about nothing.” “If Hollywood don’t wanna
make a movie of a book, how good can it be?”
A VEGAS MEMORY BY AURORE GIGUET My dad and I used to wander the desert. One day in 1980 we found a gun. I didn’t understand; I’d never seen a gun. I can see the location in my mind: flat, lots of
24
August 2014
DesertCompanion.com