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n the days before Velcro was invented and before digital clocks and microwave lunches, I took my ballerina lunch bucket, my Big Chief tablet and my new book satchel to the first day of first grade. Although my mother had taught me many nursery rhymes and how to write my name, I did not know the alphabet. I remember having to stay in at recess because I did not know the difference between M and N. I was embarking on a journey of lifetime learning in my new plaid dress and my pixie haircut.
mother and son image Marina Dyakonova /shutterstock.com
As a parent, you are your child’s first and most important teacher. Your own memories of the first day of school may be similar – the smell of new crayons, the rainbow colors of your new folders and the echo of laughter and tears as you lined up to enter school. Maybe you went to kindergarten with fat primary pencils and chubby crayons. You learned your colors and shapes and the “wheels on the bus” song. Whether your early learning fun was with Big Bird, Barney, the Teletubbies or Dora, a world of discovery lay ahead. The sense of wonder and anticipation of the first day of school has kept many a child and many a teacher awake the night before classes begin. For more than 30 years, I have been on the teacher side of the equation. There is a great excitement and sense of newness to each school year. It is a process of renewal like winter turning into spring. As a parent, I have been on the other side of the blacktop, watching my own children line up with their new classmates. After so many years of helping parents adjust and let go so that their child could begin the school adventure, I was the one crying in the parking lot when my daughter skipped off to kindergarten. The tears continued at the airport as she flew away to college a thousand miles away. The journey of learning continues. Like all parents, I worry about my children. Will they choose the right crowd? Will they remember the values we share? Have I given them the tools and resources to meet the challenges? When I think over the many school years that have come and gone, I see a few common denominators in school success.
I call them the ABC plan: is for “Ask questions.” Find out what is going on at school. Don’t just say, “What did you learn today?” because your child is likely to say “Nothing!” Go to the teacher if there is something you do not understand. I have tutored parents in algebra when they were not sure how to help their child with homework. The curriculum is changing rapidly. More is expected in earlier grades, so don’t be afraid to ask for help. is for “Be involved.” Make every effort to go to school programs, conferences and meetings. It is very important that both parents take part in school activities. Children sense very early where the priorities lie if dad goes to football and T-ball, but never makes it to report card conferences. Create family reading time to stress the importance of learning through books. Start reading to your children from birth, and they will develop a lifelong love of books. is for “Communicate positively.” Use the chain of command at your child’s school. Talk over challenges with the teacher first. Respect the teacher, and get all of the facts before you take action. If you badmouth the teacher, your child will do the same. Be kind to your child when helping them with schoolwork or counseling them about grades. “Cracking down” on them is just that: It breaks the spirit. You can set goals and boundaries that respect all partners in the education process. You are your child’s first and most important teacher. Whether they head off to prekindergarten or college, your support and love are the most important items on their school supply list. The adventure of learning extends to all, so have your No. 2 pencils ready. ✪
Katherine Lozano is the director of the Parents’ Academy. Call 210-532-0894 for information on parenting classes.
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