New York Family February 1, 2012 by New York Family

THE CITY’S BIG NEW BABY STORE

FILM SERIES FOR FAMILIES

FEBRUARY 2012

February 2012 Established 1986 newyorkfamily.com

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LOVE

WI N

KID SEMES A VIL T E R L RAI E’S RO ON PAGLROADCKIN’

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STORIES &V-DAY SURPRISES

THE

BEST CAR SEATS

FOR

2012

MUST READ

NEW YORK FAMILY

HOW TO TALK TO YOUR CHILD

ABOUT SEXUAL ABUSE

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DAILY SHOW’S

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THE COOLEST WAY TO SPEND WINTER BREAK!

FEBRUARY 18–26, 2012 – 10:00 a.m. – 5:00 p.m. Discover history, heroism and hands-on fun every day at the Intrepid Museum. And our annual Kids Week brings a host of fun-filled activities from our partners, a new Intrepid exhibit opening, creative crafts and cool demonstrations that bring science and space to life. Kids Week at Intrepid offers something for everyone – and a chance to win a FREE week at Camp Intrepid this summer and other great prizes! 18

SAT/SUNDAY

20 MONDAY

CIRCUS WEEKEND

SPACE & AVIATION DAY

Be mesmerized . . . and enjoy our Circus Fun Zone and special performances!

Interactives, Talons! live bird flight demonstration, strolling Star Wars characters and more!

21 TUESDAY

22 WEDNESDAY

23 THURSDAY

BROADWAY DAY

PUPPET DAY

SPORTS & RECREATION DAY

Enjoy special performances and activities all day!

Use your imagination and creativity during fun-filled activities, including face painting and Sesame Street Live!

Participate in interactive activities with representatives from the Rangers, Mets, Knicks, Liberty and others!

24 FRIDAY BIRTHDAY PARTY DAY

25 26

SAT/SUNDAY

SAFARI WEEKEND

Enjoy appearances and displays from the Help celebrate the zoo and meet some Intrepid Museum’s live creatures! 30th Birthday with performances from the Gazillion Bubbles Show, special party activities and much more!

DISCOVER THE FUN. Don’t just experience Intrepid during Kids Week 2012 – bring this ad in during Kids Week and receive a 10% discount off a Family Membership. For event details and to purchase tickets visit intrepidmuseum.org Themes/dates subject to change.

Sponsored by

facebook.com/IntrepidMuseum facebook.com/IntrepidMuseum Follow us:

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Improve Up to TWO GRADE LEVELS!

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EBL Coaching

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Songs of Solomon

Weill Music Institute

Family Concerts

One-hour, weekend afternoon concerts designed for families with children ages 5–10 Saturday, March 3 at 1 PM Zankel

Saturday, April 14 at 12:30 and 3:30 PM Stern/Perelman

Chantel R. Wright, Conductor

Steven Reineke, Music Director and Conductor John Tartaglia, Special Guest | Essential Voices USA Judith Clurman, Music Director and Conductor Craig Shemin, Writer

Family Sing: Songs of Solomon Come sing with New York City’s hottest student choir, the group that “positively brought down the house” (The New York Times) at Carnegie Hall’s 2009 HONOR! festival. Pre-concert activities begin at 12 PM and are free to all ticket holders.

Tickets start at

The New York Pops JIM HENSON’S MUSICAL WORLD

The magic of the classic Muppets comes alive as The New York Pops pays a musical tribute to Jim Henson’s great legacy through song and puppetry.

Carnegie Hall Family Concerts are made possible, in part, by generous endowment gifts from Mr. and Mrs. Lester S. Morse Jr., and the Henry and Lucy Moses Fund.

carnegiehall.org | 212-247-7800 | Box Office at 57th and Seventh MUPPET, MUPPETS, and the Muppet Characters are registered trademarks of The Muppets Studio, LLC. 2012 Jim Henson’s mark and logo are trademarks of The Jim Henson Company. © 2012 The Jim Henson Company. All Rights Reserved. Photos: Songs of Solomon by Nan Melville; Jim Henson Courtesy The Jim Henson Legacy, John E. Barrett. Artists, programs, dates, and ticket prices subject to change. © 2012 CHC.

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FEATURES 49 | SAM I AM The Daily Show’s Samantha Bee Is Just As Funny Talking About Star Wars, Breastfeeding Or Bassoon-Playing—And, Of Course, Being A Mom Of Three

54-60 | LOVE & MARRIAGE Four Local Writers Reflect On Marriage, Parenting And What’s Love Got To Do With It; Posh Gifts That Will Steal Your Heart; Words Of Wisdom From Six Local Experts

63 | TOP HOSPITALS From World-Class Prenatal Care To First-Rate Food Allergy Research, The City’s Top Hospitals Always Keep Family At The Forefront

FAMILY FUN GUIDE 14 | TEN GREAT EVENTS FOR FEBRUARY 18 | FILM Kids Cinema For All Ages And Stages

HOME & AWAY 70 | ON THE MARKET Four Modern Apartments Below Houston And A Cut Above

72 | HOW THEY LIVE By Bringing A Hip Sensibility To Kids Clothes, Brooklyn Couple Harald and Lynn Husum Have Made Appaman A Global Phenom

76 | QUALITY TIME Fun At Home With A Bucket Of Hearts, Valentine’s Day Sweets And A Toy Of The Year

12 | CONTESTS & SPECIAL EVENTS A free semester of Rockin’ Railroad from Kidville, Freckleface Strawberry tickets, plus February camp fairs

Black History Month for kids, a local diaper service, hot chocolate all month long and more

22 | TREATS Stripes Of All Kinds Take Over Kids Fashion For Early Spring

24 | IT’S MY PARTY Birthday celebrations at NYC Fire Museum, NYC Elite and Sports Club/LA

26 | ACTIVITY OF THE MONTH Any Child Can Create A Work Of Art—Just Ask Them

30 | STARTING OUT Pregnancy In Perspective: Sensible Advice For Getting Through The First Nine Months

34 | NEW PARENT ESSENTIALS A Parade Of The Newest And Safest Car Seats On The Market

36 | A SPECIAL PLACE The Famous 40-Year-Old Family-Run Business, J&R, Opens A Megastore For Parents This Month—Meet J&R Jr.

38 | GROWING UP Talking To Children About Sexual Abuse Is A Key Step Toward Helping Them Prevent It

44 | A GOOD IDEA

How Summer Camp Helps Kids Develop Emotional Intelligence

COLUMNS

82 | THE LAST WORD

10 | EDITOR’S NOTE Funny Valentines

New York Family | February 2012

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newyorkfamily.com

20 | SCOOP

ExerBlast—The Hottest New Activity Center And Playspace—Delivers Big Fun For Maturing Minds And Bodies

78 | CAMP COUNTDOWN

FEBRUARY

One Mother Considered New York The City Of Her Dreams... Until It Was No Longer The Right Place For Her Family

The Cover: Photography by Thaddeus Harden (thaddeusharden.com). Styled by Whitney Casser. Hair and make-up by Kim Baker for Glama-Zon Beauty. Shot on location at Kidville on the Upper West Side.

www.newyorkfamily.com

1/24/12 4:53 PM

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The Best Sports Programs, Hands Down. Chelsea Piers offers Manhattan’s best and most comprehensive selection of sports programs for children. Combining world-class facilities and age-appropriate curricula, our professional staff provides athletes the opportunity to learn and grow through sports.

Sky Rink • 212.336.6100 Learn To Skate | Figure Skating | Hockey Prep | Ice Hockey Leagues

Sports Classes at

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The Golf Club • 212.336.6400 Private Lessons | After-School Programs | Weekend Clinics

Celebrate your Birthday at Chelsea Piers! Sports | Ice Skating | Golf | Bowling | Toddler Play

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EdiTOr ANd CO-PUBLiSHEr Eric Messinger emessinger @ manhattanmedia.com SENiOr EdiTOr Whitney Casser wcasser @ manhattanmedia.com ASSOCiATE EdiTOr Kat Harrison kharrison @manhattanmedia.com ArT dirECTOr George W. Widmer gwidmer @manhattanmedia.com PrOdUCTiON MANAgEr Ed Johnson ejohnson @ manhattanmedia.com ASSiSTANT PrOdUCTiON MANAgEr Quarn Corley qcorley @ manhattanmedia.com PHOTO EdiTOr Andrew Schwartz aschwartz@ manhattanmedia.com CONTriBUTiNg PHOTOgrAPHErS

Explore your family's creativity and musicality in jazz classes for adults and kids, 8 months to 5 years.

Heidi Green, Thaddeus Harden, Michael Jurick CONTriBUTiNg WriTErS Sharon Beesley, Jessica Korbin Bernstein, Meghan Gearino, Elizabeth Raymond, Joy Sherwood, Briehn Trumbauer, Joe Wack, Mia Weber, Stephanie Wolf PUBLiSHEr John Hurley 212-268-3086, jhurley @ manhattanmedia.com ASSOCiATE PUBLiSHEr Mary Ann Oklesson maoklesson @ manhattanmedia.com SENiOr ACCOUNT MANAgEr Gina Waldman gwaldman @ manhattanmedia.com

SPRING TERM Meet the Jazz Band March 13–May 20 Soar with the saxophone, slide with the trombone, and dance along the piano keys as you get to know the instruments in the jazz band.

ACCOUNT MANAgAEr Jennifer Lesser jlesser @manhattanmedia.com SPECiAL PrOjECTS dirECTOr Alex Schweitzer aschweitzer @ manhattanmedia.com NEW YOrk BABY SHOW Rebecca Martin 212-284-9732, rmartin @ manhattanmedia.com ASSiSTANT TO THE PUBLiSHEr Laura Mishkin lmishkin @ manhattanmedia.com CirCULATiON Joe Bendik jbendik@ manhattanmedia.com AdVErTiSiNg COOrdiNATOr Jennie Valenti jvalenti @ manhattanmedia.com BUSiNESS MANAgEr Shawn Scott sscott@ manhattanmedia.com ACCOUNTS MANAgEr Kathy Pollyea kpollyea @ manhattanmedia.com Manhattan Media PrESidENT/CEO Tom Allon tallon @ manhattanmedia.com

E N R O L L T O D AY

jalc.org/webop 212-258-9922

CFO/COO Joanne Harras jharras @ manhattanmedia.com FOUNdiNg PUBLiSHEr Barbara Witt dirECTOr OF iNTErACTiVE MArkETiNg ANd digiTAL STrATEgY Jay Gissen jgissen @ manhattanmedia.com WEB PrOdUCTiON COOrdiNATOr Kathryn Fortuno kfortuno @manhattanmedia.com

Official Media Partner

New York Family is a division of Manhattan Media, publishers of AVENUE magazine, Our Town, West Side Spirit, New York Press, Mitzvah magazine, The Capitol, City Hall, City Arts, Chelsea Clinton News, The Westsider and The Blackboard Awards. © 2011 Manhattan Media, LLC | 79 Madison Avenue, 16th Floor, New York, NY 10016 | t: 212.268.8600 | f: 212.268.0577 www.manhattanmedia.com

New York Family | February 2012

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www.newyorkfamily.com

1/23/12 3:27 PM

ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE!

(...but it also helps to have a really great gift ;)

alk in jus t w A and

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editor’s note

Funny Valentines It’s something to watch a comic master do her thing. At the beginning of our cover shoot with this month’s cover subject, Samantha Bee, she struck a few pretty poses and played along nicely. But, as if by instinct, she soon enough honed in on our main prop—a dozen roses—and milked them for all their comic value. She even took a fake bite out of one (see page 52). I wouldn’t expect anything less from The Daily Show’s Most Senior Correspondent—and during our brief time together I got so much more, including some thoughtful and funny musings on Occupy Wall Street, health care and the overwhelming generosity of Americans. For more on Bee, a Canadian native turned Upper West Side mom of three, I’m going to steer you to the best possible place: Heather Chaet’s wonderful interview with her on page 49. Much as Samantha Bee’s engaging conversation flits between the hilarious and

the serious, I think that one of the strengths of this particular issue of New York Family is the varied mix of stories and themes. Above all, I’d like to recommend the article on talking with your child about sexual abuse (page 38). Needless to say, that sounds like a heavy and difficult topic but read the story; it makes a compelling case that there are ways to speak about abuse that are age-appropriate and essential for helping children prevent any unhealthy touching from adults whom they might otherwise trust. Among our lighter fare, we’ve pulled together a fantastic car seat guide (page 34); a neat fashion story about stripes for spring (page 22); and a helpful guide to a wonderful new trend in the city: film series for families (page 18). And what can we say about love that hasn’t already been said? I wasn’t sure, but four NYC parents did a terrific job sharing their thoughts (page 54), and six local experts offered advice on how to make a marriage better (page 60). As for myself, I’m going on my 15th

The flowers that started it all. year of marriage, and 12th as a dad—two roles that have brought untold blessings, lots of good times and laughter, and of course a fair share of conflict, frustration and anxiety. I’m not sure whether I’ll step up on February 14th, but my own funny valentine deserves roses from me everyday. Happy February To All, ERIC MESSINGER EDITOR emessinger@manhattanmedia.com

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Long Island 866-426-1188

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Andrew Schwartz

N e w yo r k fa m i ly c o N t e s t s & s p e c i a l e v e N t s

CONTESTS & GIVEAWAYS The New York Baby Show This Spring! The New York Baby Show will take place the weekend of May 19 and 20. To be informed about event news and ticket sales, send us a brief note with your email address and you’ll be the first to hear when registration opens! Email us at newyorkbabyshow@manhattanmedia.com.

Come Join The Camp Fairs The New York Family Camp Fair tour will be hitting the Upper West Side on Saturday, February 4 at the Bank Street School. Then, the tour travels to Westchester for programs on Saturday, February 11 and Sunday, February 12. Produced with the ACA of NY & NJ, the camp fairs are free, fun (children are welcome) and incredibly helpful—allowing parents to meet with directors from dozens of summer camps. For more information and to RSVP for these February sessions, visit newyorkfamilycamps.com.

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Free Semester Of Kidville’s Rockin’ Railroad Class All aboard! Kidville has launched a new interactive music program for newborns to children five-years-old—Rockin’ Railroad. On this exciting musical adventure, parents and children become passengers on a journey through tempo, rhythm, word recognition and sound identification. Each week, a rockin’ crew and conductor help families explore a different instrument and musical genre, while introducing special puppet friends along the way. And Kidville is giving away a 16-week semester of classes to one lucky New York Family reader—worth $725! To enter, visit newyorkfamily.com and click on the Contests & Giveaways tab for details. Deadline is Friday, February 25.

Win Freckleface Strawberry Tickets If you haven’t already seen the Off-Broadway hit Freckleface Strawberry—what are you waiting for? Based on The New York Times best-selling book by Julianne Moore, the high-energy musical tells a timeless tale of friendship and acceptance as Freckleface learns that our differences are what make us all special. Sound like fun? Shows are every Saturday and Sunday at 1 and 3pm—and we have two family 4-packs to giveaway! To enter, visit newyorkfamily.com and click on the Contests & Giveaways tab for details. Deadline is Friday, February 25. www.newyorkfamily.com

1/23/12 3:30 PM

THE NEW VICTORY THEATER presents ®

Great for the Whole Family (Recommended for everyone over the age of 5) The New Victory Theater recognizes the generous support of American Express, corporate sponsor of BRAZIL! BRAZIL!

Art: Tom Slaughter; Photos: Bruce Magilton, Kenny Mathieson

“ This show is a phenomenon” —The Guardian

NewVictory.org • 646.223.3010 NewVictory.indd 1

A NEW 42ND STREET ® PROJECT

1/18/12 10:51 AM

Alice Gets A Makeover

Great events For February

THROUGH FEBRUARY LITTLE MOLLY MUFFET & HER MONSTERS [Ages 3-9]

For more event picks for families, check out our Family Calendar at

newyorkfamily. com/events

Fans of the childhood nursery rhyme Little Miss Muffet will love the Swedish Cottage Marionette Theatre’s spin-off, which follows the adventures of Molly Muffet, the great-great-great-great granddaughter of the original Miss. When Molly is home alone, Al the spider steps in to keep her company. Together, they begin the Little Miss Muffet’s Monster-Sitting Service, but the storm of the century has other plans! Tickets are $8/general admission and $5/ children younger than 12; times vary. 81st Street and Central Park West, 212-9889093, cityparksfoundation.org.

FEBRUARY 4 ONCE UPON A MUSEUM [Ages 4-11]

The notorious Story Pirates perform content written by kids to celebrate the self-

New York Family | February 2012

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Richard Termine

Fa m i ly F u n g u i d e

expression of young authors. See the hilarious museum edition of their sketch comedy show, which features actors, puppets and live music to perform anecdotes that take place at the American Museum of Natural History. Tickets are $12; 11am and 2pm. Kaufmann Theater, Central Park West at 79th Street, 212-769-5100, amnh.org.

FEBRUARY 4 BEAT THE WINTER BLAHS [All Ages]

If you want to brave the cold, consider Prospect Park’s Winter Jam NYC. Complete with a snow-blowing machine for a fresh blanket of powder, this free outdoor sports extravaganza has everything from snowshoeing to an open snowboard competition (plus, a warming hut!). Bring your own sporting equipment or borrow it from the fest at no extra charge. Rain or shine, 11am–4pm. Long Meadow, 3rd Street and Prospect Park West, Brooklyn, nycgovparks.org. www.newyorkfamily.com

1/24/12 6:00 PM

theatre allet Ne w Yo r k

diana byer

artistic director

presents

Keith Michael’s

the alice-in-wonderland follies

1 hour program perfect for kids!

Celebrate Valentine’s Weekend With Us! Photo: Richard Termine

February 11–12 For tickets & information, visit nytb.org This program is supported, in part, by public funds from the New York City Department of Cultural Affairs, in partnership with the City Council.

Florence Gould Hall 55 East 59th Street

“Worth cheering about!” – The New York Times

“THE PAPER BAG PLAYERS

LAUGH! LAUGH! LAUGH!” The Kaye Playhouse

at Hunter college East 68th Street, between Park & Lexington

Saturday, Feb. 4th Sunday, Feb. 5th Saturday, Feb. 11th Sunday, Feb. 12th

Shows at 2:00 pm Tickets: $30, $25, $15 · Box Office: 212-772-4448 Kevin, Ted, Amy, John and Laura are back, and ready to Laugh! Laugh! Laugh!! For group sales call 212-353-2332

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thepaperbagplayers.org

1/24/12 10:25 AM

Fa m i ly F u n g u i d e FEBRUARY 5 MONKEY MONKEY LOVE [All Ages]

Meredith LeVande of Monkey Monkey Music is hosting a pre-Valentine’s Day shindig at the Bowery Poetry Club, where half of the proceeds will benefit the Children of Promise, NYC. Along with performing songs from her CD What Are the Odds?, Meredith will teach everyone how to say “I love you” in Russian and Japanese to honor her band members’ heritages. After the concert, she’ll hand out V-Day cards and goody bags. Tickets are $10; 4pm. 308 Bowery, 212-614-0505, bowerypoetry.com.

FEBRUARY 10-12 ALICE GETS A MAKEOVER [Ages 3-8]

With elements of vaudeville, burlesque, acrobatics and African Juba (mixed with a bit of traditional en pointe), The Alicein-Wonderland Follies by the New York Theatre Ballet is a vivacious and humorous show that’s still appropriate for little ones. Set in 1915 at NYC’s Palace Theater to celebrate the 50th Anniversary of Lewis Carroll’s classic, the performance will enchant with extravagant costumes—all in an hour’s time. Tickets are $36/adults and $31/kids; 7pm Friday; 1pm and 7pm Saturday; 11am, 1pm and 3:30pm Sunday. Florence Gould Hall, 55 East 59th Street, 212-355-6160, nytb.org.

FEBRUARY 11 AD HOC ROCK [All Ages]

Can you think on your feet? Drummer Matt Wilson and his Arts and Crafts

1 0 G r e at e v e N t s F o r F e B r ua r Y

ensemble will demonstrate the importance of creativity during an interactive program called “What is Improvisation?” as part of the Jazz for Young People® Family Concert series at Jazz at Lincoln Center. Wilson’s energetic music will have the whole fam tapping their toes. Tickets begin at $12; 1pm and 3pm. Rose Theater at Frederick P. Rose Hall, Broadway at 60th Street, 212-721-6500, jalc.org.

Honest Abe

FEBRUARY 11-12 GUSTAFER’S TRAVELS [All Ages]

Morgan Taylor is bringing the multimedia magic of his indie-rock show to new heights with the orchestral sounds of The Chelsea Symphony. The NYC premiere of Gustafer Yellowgold’s Golden Heart Symphony will feature the lovable cone-headed sun creature as he finds himself in crazy situations here on earth. The Symphony’s music will coordinate with big-screen animated images for an unforgettable show. Tickets are $25/adults and $15/ kids younger than 12; 11am Saturday and 4pm Sunday. Peter Jay Sharp Theatre, 2537 Broadway, 212-8645400, symphonyspace.org.

FEBRUARY 12 PITCH ME [Ages 5+] Robert Scott is one of approximately 200 still-living players from the Negro Baseball League. Kids will have the chance to meet and talk with this baseball legend, who used to play as a pitcher for the New York Black Yankees

and the Memphis Red Sox of the Negro League. Learn more about his career and design a “grand slam” baseball hat at the Children’s Museum of Manhattan. Free with regular admission; 3pm and 4pm. The Tisch Building, 212 West 83rd Street, 212-721-1223, cmom.org.

FEBRUARY 20 HONEST ABE [All Ages]

To kick off midwinter break, awardwinning artist and author Maira Kalman will read from her book, Looking at Lincoln, at the DiMenna Children’s History Museum on President’s Day. Children will get a peek into Lincoln’s past, starting with his log cabin childhood all the way up to his presidency and assassination. History will come alive with Kalman’s captivating text and artwork. Free with regular admission; 1pm. 170 Central Park West, 212-873-3400, nyhistory.org.

FEBRUARY 25 CELEBRATE A NEW NEW YEAR

Gaetano salvadore

[All Ages]

Monkey Monkey Love

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Having trouble sticking to your New Year’s resolutions? The Himalayan New Year, called Losar, is your chance to start over! Ring it in as a family at the Rubin Museum of Art by participating in a collaborative mandala project, creating colorful butter sculptures and hearing traditional music performances. You’ll also taste Himalayan butter tea and take a story drama tour of the galleries. Tickets are regular admission for adults, $10/kids, free for children younger than 1; 12-5pm. 150 West 17th Street, 212-620-5000, rmanyc.org. www.newyorkfamily.com

1/24/12 6:01 PM

Registration Opens FEBRUARY 9. Spring Term Starts MARCH 19. 212.369.8890 ext. 2080 | 555 East 90th Street, New York, NY 10128 | asphaltgreen.org

Asphalt Green Battery Park City OPENING SOON. | asphaltgreenbpc.org

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Fa m i ly F u n g u i d e

Film

SCrEEn

The Great Bear

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Kids Cinema For All Ages And Stages BY Jessica KoBriN BerNsteiN What’s not to love about movies? For a few hours, your entire world slows down and a whole other universe unfolds. Here’s what’s happening now on the silver screen in NYC.

The Film Society of Lincoln Center Technology buffs will be excited to find out that family films screened at Lincoln Center are shown on the country’s largest plasma screen. In this series formatted for kiddos 5-12, parents enjoy bleacher-style seating and a roomy front area which allows children to run amok without impeding the view. This month, all scheduled films fall under the theme Fantastic Voyages. Fams can expect both classic American and foreign features, with elements of fantasy or magic woven in. When midwinter break rolls around (February 20-24), scheduled programming includes repeated screenings of Twigson and Twigson Ties the Knot (Norway)—the story of a lonely boy who invents an imaginary friend—and The Great Bear (Denmark), which tells of a brother who has to rescue his annoying little sister from a 1,000-year-old bear.

If hunger calls, don’t miss out on the “Indie Lunch Box” available for $6 at the onsite Indie Food and Wine. All tickets are $6, subtitles read aloud. The Elinor Bunin Munroe Film Center, 144 West 65th Street, 212-875-5456, filmlinc.com.

Cobble Hill Cinema For Brooklyn dwellers, the Big Movies for Little Kids series screens every other Monday at 4pm. February kicks off with Balto, an animated feature about a dog who helped save children from the diphtheria epidemic by crossing Alaska with a dogsled team to procure a vaccine. But we’re especially excited for the end of the month (February 27), when Cobble Hill will be showing a collection of funny, albeit silent, shorts from the famed physical comedian Buster Keaton. Tickets are $7, babies 2 and under are free. Stroller parking is available at front of theatre. 265 Court Street, Brooklyn, 718-596-9113, cobblehilltheatre.com.

MoMA Presenting about one screening a month, MoMA’s unique programming trait

BABy-FriEndLy SCrEEningS New parents crave movies, too! These special screenings come with changing areas, stroller parking, plus adjusted lights and sounds. Let the wailing commence. Baby Flicks: United Artists Court Street Stadium 12 First screening of every

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Wednesday film (Rated G or PG). $9.50, children under 3 are free. 106 Court Street, Brooklyn Heights, 718-246-8170 Crybaby Matinee: City Cinemas 86th Street Wednesdays at 11am. Regular ticket prices apply, babies are free. Call for

is that it tends to show thematic groupings of shorts. This month, kids can catch “Quiet Please! Silent Films” which includes a 1920s short directed by Buster Keaton— recommended for ages six and up. The best part is, the events are totally free! Tickets are available on a first-come, first-served basis on the day of the program only. Family films show from 12-1pm on select Saturdays. The Celeste Bartos Theater, 4 West 54th Street, 212-708-9805, moma.org.

MArk yoUr CALEndAr! new york international Children’s Film Festival (March 2-25) Over 100 animated, live action and experimental shorts will drum up lots of buzz at venues all over the city. Stay tuned for screenings like A Monster in Paris (Toronto) and Tales of the Night (Berlin). Great for ages 3-18. Tickets on sale now (prices depend on film), gkids.com.

movie selection. 210 East 86th Street, 212-734-4427 rattle & reel: Sunshine Cinema Wednesdays at 12pm. $13, babies are free. 143 East Houston Street, 212-330-8182, landmarktheatres.com

For more family-friendly screenings around town, check out our Family Calendar at

newyorkfamily. com/events www.newyorkfamily.com

1/23/12 3:26 PM

PERFORMING

ARTS CENTER

Family Series - 2011/12 Mills Entertainment

Clifford the Big Red Dog Live! Saturday, February 11 1:30PM • $25

It only takes a little to BE BIG!™ In conjunction with the beloved BIG dog’s 50th anniversary in 2012, celebrate the timeless values of Clifford’s BIG Ideas - Share, Play Fair, Have Respect, Work Together, Be Responsible, Be Truthful, Be Kind, Believe In Yourself, Be A Good Friend and Help Others. Ages 3 - 7

Theatreworks USA

Henry & Mudge Sunday, February 26 3PM • $25

Moving from the city to a new house in the country can be tough. Luckily, Henry’s got Mudge, a fun 182-pound canine buddy! He teaches his new friend to sit, heel, and shake his hand, but rolling over is one trick Henry just can’t seem to teach Mudge. Ages 3 - 8

Enjoy $14 tickets as a 10Club Member

Call 212-220-1460 for more information or Visit the Box Office located on the campus of the BMCC - 199 Chambers St., NYC. Order single tickets online: www.tribecapac.org • Follow us on Facebook & Twitter

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KeepiNg pareNts iN the KNow

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phy

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1. APP Broadway Gets Ducky The award-winning A Duck In New York City picture book has finally hit the iPad in all its singing and dancing glory. This wildly entertaining tale tells the story of a small town prairie duck with big dreams of dancing on Broadway. He arrives in NYC only to have his confidence shaken by a series of challenges. But self-esteem is restored through his relationship with truck driver Big Betty. The little quacker’s trials and triumphs are entertaining for children and parents alike as jazz music amplifies the adventure. Read the text yourself, have the book read to you or play the story as an animated film. For more information, visit itunes.apple.com. 2. DRINK Hot Chocolate Fest February 1st marks the beginning of the 19th Annual Hot Chocolate Festival at City Bakery in Chelsea! The month offers up to 28 unique flavors starting with Banana Peel Hot Chocolate and ending with a Surprise Finale Hot Chocolate. In between, you can treat yourself to tastes like Bourbon (for the days when your cocoa needs a little extra kick) and Vanilla Bean. City Bakery is unique in that none of its chocolatey creations are made from mixes, powders or concentrates. Each cup of hot goodness is created from pure melted chocolate bars to ensure a truly magical taste. And did we mention homemade marshmallows? For more information on the festival and a complete list of the flavors, visit thecitybakery.com. 3. ACTIVITY Black History For Families Celebrate Black History Month with dancing, museum visits and a walking tour in the city. Kids 5 and under can blast off to outer space and learn about Mae Jamison, the first African American female astronaut. Find out how she lived and worked in space. Tuesday, February 21, 11:30am and 2:30pm, Brooklyn Children’s Museum. Or put on your dancing shoes for Family Swing Dancing lessons at the Morris-Jumel Mansion. The event is free, but

New York Family | February 2012

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advance registration is required. Tuesday, February 21, 11am12pm. And finally, teens will enjoy celebrating African American history by learning about Harlem on a Big Onion Walking Tour. See the sites associated with Malcolm X, W.E.B. Du Bois, the Harlem Renaissance and much more. February 4, 1pm; February 17, 1pm; February 26, 11am. For more information on these events and others, see our Family Calendar at newyorkfamily.com/events. 4. MUSIC A Sweet CD And Concert The Bari Koral Family Rock Band is gearing up to release its sophomore album Anna And The Cupcakes. This funky follow-up to the band’s award-winning debut, Rock and Roll Garden, is sure to delight fans of all ages. Led by acoustic guitarist, singer and songwriter Bari Koral, this 10-song CD ranges in style from blues to pop and even has some country tracks thrown in. If you want to be the first to score this new CD, check out their performance on Sunday, February 12 at the Rockefeller University Caspary Auditorium where free cupcakes are promised to all CD purchasers! For more information, visit barikoral.com. 5. SERVICE Eco-Friendly Diaper Delivery For city families weighing the pros and cons of disposable diapers, diaperkind has come to the rescue. A full service diaper laundering facility serving all five boroughs, diaperkind offers parents a convenient option that’s also environmentally conscious. The way it works is simple: a clean batch of diapers is delivered to your door at the beginning of each week in a waterproof laundry bag that doubles as a diaper pail liner. Toss dirtied diapers into the hamper bags to be picked up at the end of each week. All for a flat fee! And diaperkind uses plant-derived detergent to simplify your life and clear your conscience. For more information, visit diaperkind.com.

FoR A DAIlY DoSE oF SCooP, VISIT NEwYoRKFAMIlY.CoM. www.newyorkfamily.com

1/23/12 3:22 PM

The Art Farm In The City

a r t b i n e l g e C

10 Ye

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Find a spark that ignites your child’s creativity! 419 East 91st Street • 212.410.3117 • TheArtFarms.org

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T R E AT S

GET IN

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Just In Time For Early Spring, Stripes Of All Kinds Take Over Kids Fashion

BY WHITNEY CASSER

THE CHILDREN’S PLACE STRIPED DRESS $34.95 CHILDRENSPLACE.COM This classic blue-andwhite design is youthful yet sophisticated for growing girls. Stripes of varying widths and a belted flower add a fresh element to a timeless shift dress.

POLARN O. PYRET BRIGHT STRIPE BODYSUIT $28.50 POLARNOPYRET.COM For wee ones four months through two years, this 100% cotton long sleeve bodysuit snaps at the shoulder and diaper line for ease of access. With a solid gray trim, stripes of all colors offer a radiant rainbow of hues.

LESTER’S VIOLET + MOSS - GRAY ON GRAY HOODED SHERPA SWEATER $62 LESTERS.COM Subtle stripes don’t overwhelm this organic cotton hoodie from Violet + Moss. And with a front pocket perfect for holding the latest toy treasure, your child won’t want to take it off.

LESTER’S ANDY & EVAN - BANKER ONESIE $46 LESTERS.COM For infants with serious “business” going on, the Andy & Evan Banker Onesie hits all the right notes. Its crisp, clean look is kicked up a notch with a stand-out collar and cuffs.

PEARLS & POPCORN 100% COTTON MAYDAY MULTICOLOUR STRIPED SWEATER WITH BOAT COLLAR $55 PEARLSANDPOPCORN.COM A casual cotton pullover ideal for in-between season styling. Its neutral oatmeal base is embellished with stripes, but not overdone.

FOR MORE GREAT STRIPE FINDS AND OTHER SHOPPING IDEAS, CHECK OUT OUR TREATS BLOG AT NEWYORKFAMILY.COM.

New York Family | February 2012

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www.newyorkfamily.com

1/23/12 3:17 PM

Dine, relax and make beautiful art together, without any reservations!

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it ’s my party Harry and rose green celebrate their 3rd birthday at nYC elite.

1. The Green family flashes happy grins with the party’s “V.I.P. attendees”—Nick Jr.’s Fresh Beat Band. 2. Party guests boogie down with Little Maestros. 3. Rose and Harry get some extra lung power for blowing out those candles. 4. What’s a birthday without a ball pit? Photos by Heidi green (heidigreen.com)

sebastian Yeoh celebrates his 5th birthday at the new York City Fire Museum. 1

1. The birthday boy strikes a pose in FDNY garb. 2. A trio of friends supports a towering block structure—nice teamwork! 3. Star candles decorate Sebastian’s Dalmatian cake. 1, 2, 3, wish! 4. Party guests pose pretty. Photos by Karen Haberberg (karenhaberberg.com)

rex Cohen celebrates his 5th birthday at sports Club/La.

1. It’s group hug time! Rex hams it up for the camera. 2. Siblings, Brooke and Blake, plus Mom gather ‘round the Star Wars sweet treat for a family photo op. 3. The birthday boy scales the rock wall with no fear, just fun. Photos by Heidi green (heidigreen.com)

Interested In FeaturIng YOur CHILd’s BIrtHdaY PartY In tHe MagaZIne? send an eMaIL tO dBuCHeLLI@ManHattanMedIa.COM FOr MOre detaILs.

New York Family | February 2012

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www.newyorkfamily.com

1/23/12 3:29 PM

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Beyond Crayons

ART

Andrew Schwartz

activity of the month

With Some Instruction And Encouragement, Any Child Can Create A Work Of Art—Just Ask Them

Mollie E. Fink

Evan Pollack Eliot Ingersoll BY GAvRiellA MAhpouR If your child is artistically inclined, then encouraging him or her to develop those skills could boost both hand-eye coordination and left-brain development—besides doling out a solid dose of f-u-n. We asked a few young artists who attend some of the amazing art programs offered throughout the city to share their work with us. The bottom line: where do we sign up?

Mollie e. Fink, 6, kids at art What inspired you to create this piece? It was for my little brother’s birthday, Miles. He loves Spiderman, so I went up to my room and made [it] using only my brain. I remembered what Spiderman looked like and then I copied it in my head. I used many pieces of paper—six—to make him big. Have you given it a name? Birthday Spidey. What are your favorite materials to work with? Paper, markers, scissors and tape. How does art make you feel? Like really happy.

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Where do you think you’ll be in 20 years? I will be in an art museum.

evan Pollack, 3, MooMah What inspired you to create this piece? I thought it was cool. Have you given it a name? No. It’s the sun, the dinosaur, the clouds, the volcano and the armadillo. What is your favorite material to work with? Clay—I like to roll it. What do you want to be when you grow up? A baseball player.

eliot ingersoll, 10, hiart! What inspired you to create this piece? I was inspired by one of my favorite artists, Hayao Miyazaki. He is the creator of the movies Spirited Away, Pom Poko, Ponyo and My Neighbor Totoro. First, I sketched the picture and then I took my time to watercolor it. continued on page 28 www.newyorkfamily.com

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The Knox School is a co-educational, independent boarding and day school. Grades 6â&#x20AC;&#x201C;12 and PG, located on Long Islandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s North Shore, 50 miles from NYC. We feature a five-day boarding option, instruction in small class settings, Advanced Placement (AP) courses in all core subject areas, rich programs in the fine arts and a competitive, three-season athletic program that includes equestrian and crew. An affordable, academic and social environment allows students to meet the global challenges of today and tomorrow. We prepare our students for future success and allow them to learn and lead.

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where to take art in nyc

74th st. maGic 74magic.com 92nd street y 92Y.org

children’s museum of manhattan cmom.org

apple seeds appleseedsnyc.com

church street school for music and art churchstreetschool.org

artkids artmuseny.com

the craft studio craftstudionyc.com

the art Farm in the city theartfarms.org

discovery Programs discoveryprograms.com

art@home artathomenyc.com

Gymboree Play & music gymboreeclasses.com

children’s museum of the arts cmany.org

Gymtime rhythm & Glues gymtime.net

Hiart! hiartkids.com

moonsoup moonsoup.net

the Jcc in manhattan jccmanhattan.org

new york kids club nykidsclub.com

kids at art kidsatartnyc.com

Private Picassos privatepicassos.com

kids at work kidsatworknyc.com

state news (supplies) 112 East 86th Street 212-831-8010

kidville kidville.com little shop of crafts littleshopny.com make meaning makemeaning.com moomah moomah.com

wet Paint art studio wetpaintartstudio.com the ys ymcanyc.org young artists Program, educational alliance edalliance.org

continued from page 26 Have you given it a name? Waiting For No One. What is your favorite medium to work with? I love watercolor the [most]. I was surprised that it was not too hard to do. I started out learning to sketch and have tried sculpting, painting, printmaking, photography, stop-motion movies and collages. How does art make you feel? It makes me feel calm and relaxed—like I go to another universe, getting sucked into the picture. I never really turn off my art brain, it is always ticking. What do you enjoy about the Manga program at HiArt? It is the only class my mom has found that teaches Manga to kids. I love the teacher, Yali Lin, because she explains the steps to drawing and stays focused on the class. I also like being in a class that has kids of different ages, not just kids my age, because skill is not according to age. Yali will give us an idea of a picture to create, and everyone in the class will be working on the same thing, but the result of each person’s drawing will turn out according to their skill level. I love learning about the different Manga artists, and Yali always has a lot of different books, movies and drawings to help inspire me. The studio where we meet is really cool, too—I feel like a real artist in a studio. Where do you think you will be in 20 years? Hopefully, in 20 years I will be living in Japan and working as an illustrator. I am really inspired by Japanese artists and the culture (including the food). I hope to travel there and learn the language.

New York Family | February 2012

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Emily Braun Emily Braun, 9, ThE arT Farm in ThE CiTy What inspired you to create this piece? My love for orange elephants. What is your favorite material to work with? Paint, but I also like jewelry making. How does art make you feel? Creative. What do you want to be when you grow up? An author and maybe an illustrator.

For more inFormation on cool classes For kids, see our directory on newyorkFamily.com. www.newyorkfamily.com

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s ta r t i n g o u t

Pregnancy In PersPectIve Sensible Advice For Getting Through The First Nine Months (Including Permission To Enjoy A Glass Of Wine) BY Erica LYoN One of the most challenging aspects of working with pregnant and postpartum women is not the medical situations that may arise but seeing how women still self-blame for events or behavior that are out of their control. An example I see often is the new mom with a baby who has completely normal periods of being fussy, and Mom twists herself into knots trying to find the answer to her little one’s distress. Is it that I eat dairy? Is it that baby napped in this blanket rather than the other blanket? Is it that I am unfit as a mother? In reality, our perspective due to the physical and emotional exhaustion of becoming a new parent is often vaguely skewed during our early weeks of newborn hazing. Pregnancy, particularly one’s first, can be a time of either confidence boosting or becoming more insecure about what is to come. Here are some of my top pieces of advice for pregnant women; some are serious, and some are about having fun. For all the stresses that can unfold with becoming a new parent, it is still meant to be a joyful experience. If we can build our physical and emotional confidence during pregnancy, often the transition to the role of parent is more kind to us once the baby is here.

Stop the denial. Here is a common pregnancy rationalization I see: “My doctor is really great clinically but has no bedside manner or time for me. But if there is an emergency, he/she will be great.” Basically what you are saying is that your provider will be great about 1% of the time. But don’t you deserve it all? Raise the bar, challenge yourself to find an obstetrical provider who is clinically sound but also really nice to you while you are in a heightened state of vulnerability. If someone is abrupt or impatient with us in our prenatal visit, how will they care for us when we are in labor? Ask your girlfriends about what they liked and didn’t like about their OBs, midwives or family practice doctors. Don’t be afraid to interview providers and tour their hospitals or birth centers early on. The hunt is worth it: there are great obstetricians, family doctors and midwives that embody solid clinical practice and compassionate understanding.

Manicures and massages are a must. Taking care of you is taking care of the baby. Pregnancy is a time to fill up physically and emotionally.

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Birth Expert Erica Lyon This means self nurture: good food, rest and bodywork. And it doesn’t have to be manicures and massages—it could be yoga, cutting your work from five days a week to four, or splurging on fabulous belly lotion you use every night. Taking time to do what we personally consider our “self-care” routines reduces anxiety and reconnects us to the big picture.

Take control of what you can and let go of what you can’t. This is what we have control over during pregnancy: how we care for ourselves, our choice of provider and how we prepare ourselves. That’s about it. Sometimes, because of a heightened awareness of our vulnerability, we try to ramp up our attempts at control. It can be startling that a very personal process is being publicly shared. While we are not generally used to sharing the softer side of ourselves, our fledgling vulnerability becomes our strength in pregnancy, birthing and parenting. There is a difference between acknowledging our need for connectedness and being “dependent.” Pregnancy encourages an interdependence of relationships and community that is essential to you and your family’s well-being.

Forget cheese and wine bans. For me, diet soda is one of the few absolute “no”s. Popular artificial sweeteners have been linked to some pretty terrible continued on page 32 www.newyorkfamily.com

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continued from page 30 things for developing babies. As for cheese, it needs to be made with pasteurized milk or aged for 60 days, and it’s pretty hard to find cheese that doesn’t fall into this category. And if you have hurdled the first trimester and have a glass of vino at a wedding reception, your provider will probably reassure you it’s all right. Fetal alcohol syndrome comes from repeated daily exposure, not a single drink on a special occasion. I’m guessing that eight months in, we could almost all benefit from some good cheese and a thimble of wine.

First trimester prenatal vitamins are not the “be all, end all.” The reality is, we often feel really sick to our stomachs, and these horse pills tend to aggravate the morning sickness. Here’s what helps: Take them with meals—dinner rather than morning. A really great option to try is liquid vitamins, often found in health food stores, or even the kids’ chewable options. Both of these tend to be much easier on our fragile sense of smell and stomach in the first weeks of pregnancy.

to be ready to begin this beautifully messy episode of your life may be time and money better spent elsewhere.

Don’t read (or do stop reading) parenting books that give you anxiety. Instead, try some of the books by people such as Penny Simkin (Pregnancy, Childbirth, and the Newborn), Sheila Kitzinger (The Complete Book of Pregnancy and Childbirth), myself (The Big Book of Birth) and William Sears (The Pregnancy Book). Some popular pregnancy books can be experienced as high anxiety. Soon-to-be-mothers need pregnancy books that increase confidence. Here’s wishing you less worry and more enjoyment! For more tips on pregnancy and new parenthood, see our Born & Bred Blog at newyorkFamily.com.

Pregnancy is about food. There is no better time in our life to look at the quality of the food we put into ourselves. If we are going to eat greens, organic greens have more vitamins and minerals and less toxins than nonorganic. Broiled fish has more healthy omegas than fried. The quality of how food was raised or harvested impacts our growing baby, and in thinking long-term, the world we raise our child in. One of the top three “green” choices one can make during pregnancy and parenting is your food sources.

Your life is not ending—it’s just a new beginning. Your first pregnancy doesn’t have to be the time to finish your thesis, perfect your job or renovate the kitchen. Since people have started waiting a little longer to have kids, pregnancy has suddenly become a ninemonth deadline for our great Checklist of Life. Yet, becoming a parent makes you smarter, teaching you how to share, prioritize, think faster and multitask. All these skills will help you achieve whatever you think you need to—it just doesn’t have to be this very second. Personally, I don’t recommend major purchases or renovations until your kids are past spilling things on the sofa, pulling out drawers so hard that they break or gouging the walls and scratching the floors as they move furniture to make forts. We definitely need to get space ready for the baby but the idea that the whole house has

New York Family | February 2012

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two great resources For expectant parents Birth360 Erica Lyon, author of The Big Book of Birth, has recently launched a website for new and expectant parents, birth360.com. As the founder of Realbirth, Lyon spent seven years helping more than 12,000 New York parents better understand childbirth. Now, she’s back with Birth360—a new resource to guide the city’s childbirth education efforts. With dozens of short and informative films on everything from surviving postpartum to prepping the older child for the arrival of a sibling, birth360.com delivers Lyon’s relaxed, humorous yet practical style to a national audience.

tribeca parenting Lyon is also the consulting Education Director at Tribeca Parenting (tribecaparenting.com), a citywide pregnancy, postpartum and parenting education center affiliated with Tribeca Pediatrics. Offering a variety of classes to help expectant parents through a healthy and happy pregnancy and delivery, Tribeca Parenting guides new moms and dads through the exciting transition into parenthood.

www.newyorkfamily.com

1/23/12 3:21 PM

ONGOING REGISTRATION

creative movement ages 3-4 pre-ballet ages 5-6 graded ballet ages 5-6 after-school ballet ages 7-18

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s ta r t i n g o u t

New pareNt esseNtials

BuCKLE uP

A Parade Of The Newest And Safest Car Seats On The Market

BY Kat HarrisoN When it comes to car seats, nothing’s more important than the safety of your child. But secondary features like ease-of-use and modern design don’t hurt either. We rounded up 11 of the newest models— from newborn to toddler—boasting everything you love: sleek styles, state-of-the-art accessories and, of course, leading safety features.

5 1

Evenflo Embrace™ 5 LX The rear-facing Embrace™ is built for babes 5 to 22 lbs. and comes with three shoulder harness positions and two crotch buckle sites for better fit and extended use. Plus, your infant will never burn—from wind or sun—thanks to the pivoting canopy. $89.99, evenflo.com

Summer Infant Prodigy™ Utilizing Smart Screen technology, a perfect installation is guaranteed on the first try. The SafeGuard® 1-Adjust™ harness system automatically conforms to your child’s body for a snug and safe fit. Base included. $179.99, summerinfant.com/ prodigy

CYBEX Aton With a sleek white handle and twoposition designer canopy—which discreetly tucks under—this ultra light model is a cinch to install (not to mention secure), thanks to its unique tensioning system. For little ones weighing in at 4-32 lbs, under 30 inches tall. $229, giggle.com

Diono RadianRXT® Get more bang for your buck with the RadianRXT®, a car seat that converts into a booster for children up to 120 lbs. Built for comfort, this system comes equipped with a cup holder plus 12 height positions for adjustable head support. Folds flat for travel and storage, ideal for city life. $399, amazon.com

Britax ADVOCATE 70 CS With both rear- and forward-facing capabilities, this stylishly patterned Britax model has a 70-pound weight capacity. And the ADVOCATE comes equipped with exterior energy-absorbing cushions in case of a side impact crash. $379.99, britaxusa.com

Chicco KeyFit® 30 Magic Tailored as a car seat for every season, just flip over the KeyFit® insert which features cozy micro-suede on one side for winter and breathable mesh on the other side for summer. The ergonomic head insert will even discourage “flat head syndrome.” $199.99, babiesrus.com

New York Family | February 2012

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www.newyorkfamily.com

1/20/12 5:18 PM

The New York BaBY Show The New York Baby Show will take place the weekend of May 19 and 20. To be informed about event news and ticket sales, send us a brief note with your email address and you’ll be the first to hear when registration opens! email us at newyorkbabyshow@manhattanmedia.com.

Clek Foonf Coming in August, the revolutionary Foonf is constructed from 100-percent recycled materials. Built with improved space-saving capabilities for smaller vehicles, this seat also boasts crumple zone technology (just like your car) to protect your infant from a frontal collision. $499.99, shopclekinc.com

Maxi-Cosi Pria™ 70 Air The Pria™ 70 boasts a superior TinyFit™ system for the smallest of passengers (4 lbs. and up), allowing for an upright rear-facing installation that ushers more leg room in front. Eleven harness heights and three buckle locations provide ultimate adjustability. $250, babiesrus.com

Orbit Toddler Car Seat G2 The G2 boasts 360˚ rotation—for easy entrance and exit out of your vehicle at nearly any angle. Plus, this model is eco-mindedly outfitted with non-toxic fabric from headrest to base, so we deem this green seat fit for toddler royalty up to 65 lbs. $380, orbitbaby.com

Safety 1st® onBoard™35 Air Customizable for preemies, the onBoard™’s low harness and adaptable insert can accommodate a 4-pound little one but also boasts extra leg room for infants up to 35 lbs. The One Click LATCH system makes installation a breeze for safe travel s. $159.99, target.com

Graco My Ride™ 65 The proof (and the safety) is in the pudding: children stay rear-facing up to 40 lbs. and then are secured forward in a 5-point harness up to 65 lbs. Energyabsorbing foam and dual cup holders make this seat a trusted and affordable buy. $159.99, babiesrus.com

www.newyorkfamily.com

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FOR AddiTiOnAl inFO On CAR SeAT ACCeSSORieS, See OuR BORn & BRed BlOG On newyORkFAMily.COM.

February 2012 | New York Family

1/20/12 5:18 PM

a spEcial placE

andrew schwartz

s ta r t i n g o u t

Jason Friedman with his wife, Danielle, and kids, Micole and Oliver.

J&R’s New BaBy The Famous 40-Year-Old Family-Run Business, J&R, Opens A Megastore For Parents This Month—Meet J&R Jr. BY ElisaBEth FraNkEl rEEd It’s a brisk day in early January at J&R Jr. and Jason Friedman is showing his wife and kids what has kept him so busy for the past six months. The space isn’t quite finished, shelves are only partially stocked and luggage still lingers in the performance area, but a gaggle of happy children tinkering with a wooden train set hint at what it will feel like on February 13th when the ribbon is cut and the landmark store’s newest department officially opens. Originally a part-time venture selling records out of a downtown Manhattan basement, J&R was founded in 1971 by Joe and Rachelle Friedman using the money they had received as wedding gifts. They soon combined Joe’s interest in electronics and Rachelle’s interest in music—not to mention their first initials—to create what has become the famous Manhattan music and electronics megastore. Since then, the business has grown to cover everything from guitars and home theaters to housewares. It’s also a cultural destination with intimate performances inside and free concerts every summer outside in City Hall Park, just across the street from their block-long hub. Growing up in such a musical environment led Joe and Rach-

New York Family | February 2012

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elle’s son, Jason, to develop a strong interest in music himself. “I grew up being the lucky kid to get to meet all these rock stars,” he recalls. Some of the many legends that have passed through the store include Michael Jackson, Harry Connick, Jr., Tony Bennett and Beyoncé. During the dot-com boom, Jason decided to build a website for his parents’ store. “Everybody was saying ‘You have to get your business online,’ but nobody really knew what that meant,” he recalls. Today, JR.com makes up more than half of the company’s business. In August 2001, Friedman left to attend business school at the University of Southern California, just weeks before September 11th. Because J&R is only a few blocks from Ground Zero, the events of that tragic day hit the company hard. Friedman made the quick decision to come home and help restart the family business. J&R was able to reopen after a six-week shutdown. And for Friedman, his return to NYC held more than rebuilding a company. “Luckily, I met Danielle, my wife, within two weeks of moving back,” he shares. Ten years later, Friedman has a four-year-old daughter, Micole, and a one-year-old son, Oliver. Although his focus now is on famwww.newyorkfamily.com

1/23/12 3:23 PM

Andrew Schwartz

the fastest growing residential community in the city…but there really is no community center [or] kids’ hang-out hub,” he says. The store will be able to serve that function with an event space that will host interactive classes, workshops and panels. This event/performance area is located at the top of the escalator and will be available to host private parties, prenatal classes and school admissions seminars, as well as public events. It will include professional sound and lighting equipment for concerts, which will be streamed online. Fans of Rockin’ with Andy and Little Maestros will be pleased to know that the perennial New York City kids’ favorites have already agreed to do classes. In addition to serving families who live in the neighborhood, J&R Jr. is the perfect place for families to meet up for a class and a quick bite in the kid-friendly café after parents leave the office. Families from further away won’t be left out either. J&R is adding a free parking garage, removing the biggest hassle of going downtown. Looking ahead, Friedman would love to have his children eventually join the company sphere. “If they want to come here, I would absolutely welcome them and of course, I want this to stay a family business,” he says. But whether the next generation chooses to take an active role or not, the range of products offered by J&R will continue to grow. “We’re just adapting to the needs of consumers,” Friedman explains, pointing out some of the many changes that have occurred over J&R’s 40-year history, from new offerings in electronics, hi-fi and TVs to more domestic goods like housewares and J&R Jr. No one knows what the next 40 years will bring, but J&R plans to be there, providing savvy New Yorkers with “the gadgets of the decade.” For more inFormation on classes and seminars at J&r Jr., visit newyorkFamily.com/events.

ily, he still loves gadgets. And after spending many hours browsing websites and visiting baby megastores, he realized just how much cool stuff for kids was out there. “I just wanted to be a part of it and thought I could put my spin on it,” he explains. After checking with friends and doing some further research, he learned that while consumers were not spending much money on themselves due to concerns about the economy, they were happy to spend money on their children. Between his enthusiasm and the clear commercial reasons for catering to parents, it was practically a no-brainer to incorporate it into the family business. The recently opened J&R Jr. offers parents—and particularly new and expectant moms and dads—the same mix of excellent products and expert service that J&R has always given tech enthusiasts. This comprises the standard fare of gadgets and electronics like baby monitors and humidifiers, but also includes kids clothing, strollers, high chairs, car seats, safety accessories and some furniture, as well as learning toys and games. Major brands that you can find in the store are phil&teds, Quinny, 4moms, EduShape, Alex, Melissa & Doug, LeapFrog, Skip Hop, Faber-Castell, B. toys and many more. But the store won’t sell just anything. Friedman intends to hand select only the best offerings for kids ages 0-9. He is particularly impressed with how advanced strollers have become in recent years. In order to demonstrate these improvements, there will be a stroller test course shaped like a lollypop at J&R Jr. It will have a variety of terrain, including gravel and grass, so parents can test on a range of surfaces and obstacles. Friedman’s vision for J&R Jr. includes more than just cool gear and educational toys and games. “[The financial district] is www.newyorkfamily.com

STARTINGOUT_0212.indd 37

a Grand opening Family day!

To celebrate the grand opening of J&R Jr., the store is hosting a Family Day on February 12th with carnival games, balloon animals, popcorn, prizes and goody bags. The Amazing Max, Princess Christine and Little Maestros will be performing. To lure uptown families, buses will run from the Upper East and West Sides directly to the party. For more information, visit Jr.com/jr. February 2012 | New York Family

1/23/12 3:24 PM

growing up

My Body Belongs To Me Talking To Children (In Age-Appropriate Ways) About Sexual Abuse Is A Key Step Toward Helping Them Prevent It BY HeatHer Ouida A few years ago, Jill Starishevsky, a prosecutor of child abuse and sex crimes in NYC, handled a case where a little girl was being regularly molested by her stepfather from the time she was 6-years-old until she was nine. After three years of being abused and keeping it quiet (which is very common), all it took was watching an episode of Oprah for the young girl to stand up for herself. Focused on sexual abuse in children, the show’s message was: “If someone is hurting you, tell an adult. If you are too scared to tell your parents, then tell a teacher.” Inspired by the episode, Starishevsky’s client told her teacher the very next day.

93% of child sexual abuse happens at the hands of someone that is known to the child— someone in the child’s inner circle. Stranger danger only accounts for 7% of sexual abuse. It was this heartbreaking case that prompted Starishevsky to write the children’s book My Body Belongs to Me, and to kick-start her campaign of educating parents on how and why to start the difficult conversation with their children about body boundaries and the necessity of telling an adult if someone ever hurts or touches them inappropriately.

New York Family | February 2012

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What I love about your book is that it’s a conversation starter for children as young as three and as old as ten. This dialogue is very different than the one about “stranger awareness” because one of the things I learned from you is that sexual predators are often people that the children already know. Parents think that they have done a service to their child by only discussing stranger danger, and that if you’ve had this conversation with your child, then they’re safe. But the statistics reveal a very different truth: 93% of child sexual abuse happens at the hands of someone that is known to the child—someone in the child’s inner circle. Stranger danger only accounts for 7% of sexual abuse. How prevalent is sexual abuse in children? It is more pervasive than people [think]. Child sexual abuse affects 1 in every 4 girls and 1 in every 6 boys by the age of 18 in the U.S. It could happen to anyone’s child. There are what I call three big truths about child sexual abuse—number one is that it does not discriminate. It doesn’t matter if you’re black, white, rich or poor. The second big truth is that parents aren’t talking to their children about sexual abuse. They don’t want to scare the child, or they think that if someone was harming their child then their child would tell them or that they would be able to tell or sense if their child was being abused. Which leads to the third big truth, which is that children do not immediately disclose sexual abuse. The only way to combat these truths is through prevention education.

continued on page 40

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10 Tips To Keep Children Safe From Sexual Abuse Jill Starishevsky helps parents educate their children about the issue of molestation on her website, mybodybelongstome.com which is full of helpful resources like this list of preventative tips. 1. No secrets. Encourage your children to tell you about things that happen to them that make them feel scared, sad or uncomfortable. If someone, even a grandparent, were to say something to my child such as, “I’ll get you an ice cream later, but it will be our secret,” I firmly but politely say, “We don’t do secrets in our family.” Then I say to my child, “Right? We can tell each other everything.” 2. Don’t dress children in clothing or accessories with their name on it. Customized clothing can help create a false sense of trust. If a stranger says your child, “Jenny, your mom told me to bring you home so you can have dinner,” your child may be more inclined to go along because this person knows their name. 3. Teach your child the correct terms for their body parts. This will make them more at ease if they need to tell you about a touch that made them feel uncomfortable. Inform children that the parts of their body covered by their bathing suit are private and are for no one else to see or touch (noting the necessary exceptions for

bathing, potty issues and medical exams in the presence of mom or dad). 4. Practice “what if” scenarios. Say to your child, “What would you do if someone offered you a treat or a gift when I wasn’t there?” Help your child arrive at the right answer, which is to say “no” and ask you first. Many parents also encourage children to walk or run away in this situation. 5. Teach your child their name, address and phone number at an early age. If a child has their parent’s cell phone number, the child can be reunited with the parent more expeditiously. 6. Prepare a child with what to do if they get lost. Teach your child to find a safe person if they become lost. A safe person is a police officer, someone in the store with a store uniform or name tag, or a mother with children. Children should also learn to stay in the general area where they last saw you so you can find them when you retrace your steps. 7. Internet safety. Install a safety browser on your computer so that you can make the decisions about which websites are appropriate for your children to view. Teach your child never to give out their last name, address or phone number to a person on the Internet and

continued from page 38

How old should a child be before you start talking about it with him or her? It really depends on the child, but as long as the child is old enough to communicate with you and understand what you’re saying, and has times when they are out of your sight, that means you should start this conversation. Typically around age three. Why do children often not tell anyone when they are being abused? One of the main reasons children, especially young children, don’t tell is because the predator said, “This is our secret.” Children want to please this person. And they like having this special secret. Is there anything you would add to your important 10 Ten Safety Tips list (see above)? We need to listen when our children say “no.” So if Mom or

New York Family | February 2012

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never to meet Internet friends in person without a parent’s supervision and consent. Teach children not to post pictures with identifying information such as a school uniform. Ideally, children should not post pictures on the Internet at all. Always keep your computer in a public area of your house, not in a child’s bedroom. 8. Let children decide for themselves how they want to express affection. Children should not be forced to hug or kiss if they are uncomfortable. Even with your favorite aunt, uncle or cousin, your child should not be forced to be demonstrative in their affection. While this may displease you, by doing this, you will empower your child to say “no” to inappropriate touching. 9. Teach your child that adults do not need to ask children for help. Predators use tricks to lure children, for example, asking them to help find a lost pet, give directions or help carry something. When you are sitting down talking to your child, use these examples as part of your “what if” scenarios to reinforce the lessons about safety. 10. Teach children the buddy system. Children should learn it is safer to be with a friend or trusted adult than to be alone. Encourage children to trust their feelings if something doesn’t feel right, they should get away and tell you about it immediately.

Dad is having a tickling game with their child and that child says, “Stop” than we need to listen. We need to teach them that their “no” means something. How do we help children understand that it’s okay to say “no” to an adult? Saying “no” to an adult is something you actually have to practice with children because we teach our children to be respectful of adults. For example, on my daughter’s first day of kindergarten my husband said to her, “Have a great first day of school. Do everything your teacher says.” And I thought to myself, “No, that’s not what we say.” What we need to say to our children is, “Listen to everything the teacher says unless the teacher is telling you to do something that hurts you and then you don’t have to listen to what the teacher tells you.” We need to reinforce the message: “If someone is hurting you, you can say ‘no’, you can run away and you should tell someone right away.” continued on page 42 www.newyorkfamily.com

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continued from page 40

Apparently predators often use a grooming process with their victims. Can you talk about this? Sexual predators often take baby steps. One of the ways this grooming process begins is by the predator giving the child a gift. First they may touch a child’s arm or leg for too long just to see if that child will tell. If a child has been educated about inappropriate touching, then there is a greater likelihood that they will not go after that child.

Saying ‘no’ to an adult is something you actually have to practice with children because we teach our children to be respectful of adults. Are there warning signs we can look for if we fear something has happened to our child? The physical signs may include redness to private body parts but most often the emotional and behavioral signs are obvious first. It is important to note that there are often no physical signs, especially in cases where there is a delay in disclosure. A big red flag is age-inappropriate sexual behavior or knowledge. It’s so hard to tell but what I do tell parents is that the signs are unique to each child. A child

doing really well in school suddenly does poorly. Or a child that always loves wearing short sleeves, now only wants to wear long sleeves. If we do sense something is going on with our child or if our child comes to us and says they are being sexually abused, what should we do and say? The first thing to do is believe your child. Even before you pick up the phone and call the police, the child is going to be looking for your reaction. I read somewhere that it’s more traumatic for a child to have a parent that didn’t believe than dealing with the repercussions of the abuse itself. That means you can’t express anger or sadness in front of your child because children think you are angry and sad at them. Also, children often disclose incrementally, so if a parent goes off the handle then the child is less likely to tell them the full story. Support the child. Tell them they made the right decision in telling you. Then you can seek professional assistance including the police, hot lines and advocacy centers. Heather Ouida is the co-president of babybites, a social and educational community of moms and moms-to-be, and a regular contributor to New York Family.

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GROWING UP

A GOOD IDEA

Andrew Schwartz

AN OUT-OFTHIS-WORLD ADVENTURE ExerBlast—The Hottest New Activity Center And Playspace— Delivers Big Fun For Maturing Minds And Bodies BY JESSICA CIOSEK Picture this: an indoor playspace that caters to big kids while simultaneously keeping minds and bodies active. That’s exactly what my kids and I discovered when we visited ExerBlast in Tribeca. The brainchild of dancer, personal trainer and mom of two Kate Gyllenhaal, ExerBlast is an innovative ﬁtness concept that incorporates the best parts of gaming theory while motivating kids to get moving. To kick off the New Year, I took my son, 10, and daughter, 12, along with a friend of hers for a visit to ExerBlast to drop in at one of their “After School is Cool” semester-long classes. When we arrived, the place was subdued with a few kids waiting to begin their classes. The quiet did not last long. Greeted by a cheery guide named Hannah, my trio of kid testers signed in, made nametags and were ﬁtted with utility belts. Fully equipped with programmed iPods, the belts act as pedometers for young blasters ready to break a sweat. The iPod app actually tracks the blaster’s movements and tallies energy points that he or she racks up during the blast session. The object of the game is, of course, to accumulate as many points as possible as one moves through the mission. All buckled up and ready to go, Hannah led the kids into an

New York Family | February 2012

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enormous white space splashed with dancing lights and lines of bright colors, anchored by a huge climbing structure and a circular rock wall. I followed behind getting the scoop from Gyllenhaal (also known as the Chief Fun Ofﬁcer) and wished I could join in, too. The adventure was about to begin. After a short bit of instruction, we troop downstairs. We enter a darkened space with tons of tinted lights and lines jetting across the ﬂoor—you really feel like maybe you could blast off into space here. And we do in a way. First stop is the “Blast Off” zone. Here, Commander Pi, the pineapple-headed leader from the planet Botania introduces the mission to the group of blasters. Botania is mysteriously losing energy and he needs the blasters to create as much energy—or Xi (“chee”)—as possible to save it. This is an essential piece of the ExerBlast mission, according to Gyllenhaal. “We want kids to understand that the energy their bodies create is something to be valued,” she explains. Commander Pi then leads the kids through a series of stretching and warm-up exercises to get them ready for the adventure ahead. From there the blasters are off running, jumping, lunging and crawling all the while working up a sweat and collecting Xi points along the “Power Path.” The Power Path visually leads www.newyorkfamily.com

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growing up

A Good ideA ing. Every parent’s dream. The typical mission lasts one hour but ExerBlast also offers a two-and-a-half hour blast that includes the Botania mission along with a healthy cooking adventure or a yoga session. As expected, ExerBlast is equipped with a full kitchen and an inviting and airy birthday room. According to Gyllenhaal, the prime age for young blasters is between 5 and 14 years old but there truly is something for everyone in the ExerBlast experience. As a mom of older kids, the opportunity to get moving is a real boon for us all. So much of adult life is spent carting the kids to one place or another and waiting and watching while they have all the fun. ExerBlast is the kind of place where moms and dads can get in on the fun, too—if only I’d worn the proper shoes! Whole families come and enter into friendly competitions with one another. Other times it’s a school field trip or a birthday party. Several corporations have even used the ExerBlast experience for team building workshops. With an office tucked into a tiny room behind the “Singing Spheres” zone, ExerBlast’s CEO Don Sunderland is the wizard of the Oz-like experience that defines ExerBlast. A parent of three, Sunderland is a tech guy

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“You really feel like maybe you could blast off into space here.” Kate Gyllenhaal, Chief Fun Officer of ExerBlast blasters to the various activity zones of the mission. There are nine different zones including the “Climbatron,” a light-sensored jungle gym, the “Energy Field,” a light-sensored floor game and the “Power Wall,” an infrared wall puzzle. All of the zones incorporate both movement and a gaming challenge, and are exhaustingly fun, to say the least. After almost an hour’s worth of movement and activity, every ExerBlast mission ends with a visit to the “Blast Down” zone, a hushed (and thoroughly calming) yoga and Pilates hub designed exclusively for weary blasters just back from their mission. Here the young charges cool down, stretch and relax their bodies while sending their newly acquired energy directly to the planet Botania. All in a day’s work. This is the space I most wished to indulge in! Looking at ExerBlast from afar, the playspace is more than just time to run around and burn off extra energy. The whole adventure moves up and downstairs multiple times and covers virtually all of the 6,400 square feet of building space. Bobbing and weaving past other groups of blasters, we can see that the place is filled with the laughter and delight of other kids running and jumping with abandon. Music, however, is piped into each blaster’s individual headset so the place isn’t cacophonous or overwhelm-

New York Family | February 2012

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with a background in business and education. From a table and a laptop, he runs the lights and programs that keep the ExerBlast missions moving right along. I peppered him with questions about how they came up with so many great ways to marry gaming with exercise. According to Sunderland, ExerBlast offers a physical way into the often overlooked benefits of gaming, among them specific goals, concrete challenges, rewards and victories. And, as my kids can happily attest to, blasters strive to reach certain point thresholds so they can “level up” to new challenges and even earn prizes. Future plans for the ExerBlast experience are many and varied. From offering specific classes for children with special needs to designing and creating new apps for use both in and out of the ExerBlast space, there are many things pinned to the drawing board. And the ExerBlast team also has an eye toward expansion. Plans are in the works for a future franchise model. Soon enough we could be seeing ExerBlasts popping up all over the country. Until then you’ll have to travel to Tribeca to get blasting but it is certainly worth the trip. As my brood’s sweaty, flushed faces could attest, ExerBlast is a truly an out-of-this-world adventure. For more inFormation on birthday parties and adventures at exerblast, visit newyorkFamily.com and click on our birthdays tab. www.newyorkfamily.com

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February 2012 | New York Family

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New York Family | February 2012

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amantha Bee has made me laugh so hard I’ve hiccupped for 23 minutes straight as I watched her flex her funny bone on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. She has made me cackle to the point where I’ve forgotten what time it was as I devour the essays in her book I Know I Am, But What Are You?. And yes, I’ve snickered so fiercely reading her “Eating Over The Sink” blog on Babble.com, that I have, as we say in our abode, tooted. Over a relaxed afternoon conversation at a chic hotel bar, Samantha confesses, shares and confides about her life and experiences in parenthood with an equal measure of wit and honesty— from working with her husband and the one thing in this world that will make her “Tiger-Mom out,” to how her boobs will look after breastfeeding for 72 months straight. Find out how this smart and hilarious mom navigates New York City with three kids—and what makes her laugh. You’re the Most Senior Correspondent on The Daily Show, you guest star on tons of television shows and movies, you’ve written a book, you blog, you have three kids under the age of six [Piper, 6-years-old; Fletcher, 3 ½; and Ripley, 17 months], you have good hair…how do you get it all done? Do you have a clone? Yes—and my clone technology is about to take the world by storm. I have a science lab in my apartment… I should, for the record, say I don’t live in a one-bedroom apartment anymore. I live in a 2.5-bedroom apartment. What is in the “point-five” room? The point-five room is what we use as a home office, but basically, it’s just a different kind of playroom with important documents that the baby can get into. She knows our passports are in there, and she should go for them…and we are not smart enough to move our passports to higher ground. So how do you do it all? I really don’t think I do anything unusual. Jason is one-half of our whole, so I have a complete 50% partner in this experience. Together, we are constantly doing teamwork at all points of the day. Our work environment is so supportive about our schedule. We are very fortunate. You and Jason Jones, fellow Daily Show correspondent, raise a family and work together. Do you ever get sick of each other? I did notice last week, on many occasions, he did not listen to the details of what I was saying and then even when he would ask me about those details later on, and I repeated the details, he wasn’t even listening then. So, I think that he has an effective way of tuning me out when he needs private mental space. Everyone needs private mental space. You met doing children’s theater. Who told the first joke? Doing children’s theater is a free-for-all for jokes, so I couldn’t even tell you. The first time we really noticed each other is so nerdy. Somebody asked me what my favorite movie was of all time. I had to say that my sentimental favorite was Star Wars, and that was the first time he ever really looked at me. www.newyorkfamily.com

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You write a Babble blog called “Eating Over The Sink” with fellow Canadian funny mom/actress Allana Harkin. What seems to be the parenting topic that really riles up the blogosphere? We didn’t realize that the topic of breastfeeding was the world’s most hot button issue. I wrote a post thinking about what shape my boobs will be once I stop breastfeeding. I’m still breastfeeding, and I was thinking about how my older daughter just turned six, so I haven’t really seen [my boobs] au natural, with no other usage in six years. I have no idea what they will look like. They could look the same. They could be ten times better…though, that’s not my impulse. So what happened on the blog? I was just ruminating on that topic, and it made people go ballistic. Basically, I got accused of sabotaging people who wanted to breastfeed, as the message I was putting out into the universe about breastfeeding wasn’t necessarily 100% positive. So, our retort was, “Did you not read the part where I was breastfeeding for 72 months straight?” What I do support is choice in all matters concerning your own body. The reactions [to our blog] have been very positive, and the negativity has been more interesting and slightly more amusing than horrifying, and it’s very infrequent. Both you and Jason are on TV and both of you have guest starred on Sesame Street. Do your kids think that’s cool? No. They don’t think that we are cool or what we do is cool. They think everyone’s parents are on TV. They don’t have a frame of reference. We did take them to the set when I filmed my part as Mother Goose, and that was exciting. Did they meet Elmo? They did. I know that some kids will go up and hug [the characters]. My kids were just so overwhelmed that they withdrew inward. You could tell they were excited and loved it, but were completely in shock. We have pictures. They look like a bomb just went off. Are your kids funny? I think they are the funniest creatures on earth. The baby just told her first joke. She pointed to herself [and] said, “Daddy,” and thought it was hilarious. She cracked herself up. How was the whole “getting the kids into school/preschool” process for you? It was incredibly intimidating and I don’t recommend it. [laughing] We are totally happy where we are, we love it, but by the end of the process, we were going into school interviews and saying, “I don’t care what you are teaching, just make her smarter than me, and we’re good with that!” It’s such a hectic process. I think the parents of New York should go on a school strike. I mean, if we all agreed [to] keep our children out of school until all of these organizations got their shit straight and not make it such an incredibly overwhelming and horrendous experience, things would be better. They would, of course, have to fix the public schools… That is kind of a little thing, but when I rule the world, I will fix this for everybody. February 2012 | New York Family

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life. You shouldn’t have to fit into their life.” We really took that to heart, and it has worked very well for us. Best advice you give to others about parenthood? I gave Allana this advice without even being aware of it, and it helped her immeasurably. I said that all mothers are liars. We don’t even know we are doing it. You forget the details [of those first days and months with a baby]. You end up telling lies about how it all went for you—it wasn’t that bad—because that is how you remember it, but you have forgotten how hard it was. We aren’t being malicious about it, but we end up spreading misinformation to new moms, who then think they are doing something wrong— and it terrifies them. What natural talent do you wish you were born with? I wish I was born with musical talent. Doesn’t everyone say that who isn’t a musician? I wish that my parents had forced me to take piano lessons.

I’ve read in other interviews that the Bee-Jones family often heads out of town on the weekends, but what is your ideal family day in the city? We go to Landmarc for breakfast—they have lots of highchairs, it’s yummy, and I feel like a grown-up there. Then, it involves some type of stroll to a farmers market. It’s not everybody else’s idea of fun, but it is fun for me, and since this is about me and my ideal day, then we are going to a farmers market and I am loading up on parsnips and hand-twisted pretzels. Then we come home, the children watch a movie, and we just sort of hang out. It’s the time for New York Family’s version of the Proust Questionnaire. Are you going to make me cry? Because one time, a person did that. I literally made myself cry. Do you cry often? I mean, your home must be filled with laughter all of the time. I am a crier. We are all just really emotional. We just let it hang out because there is no point in keeping it in. Okay, here we go: What’s your favorite word your kids say? I love it when my son says “hamburger” because he says “hangaber.” I find it hilarious. I’m always asking him to say “hamburger” and then laugh at him. I’m sure it is damaging him psychologically. Favorite noise in your home? When they are all giggling together. Least favorite noise in your home? When they are all whining together. You have to separate them and figure out where battle lines are. Best advice you were given about parenthood? “When children are born, you have to make them fit into your

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“The parents of New York should go on a school strike. If we all agreed [to] keep our children out of school until all of these organizations got their shit straight and not make it such an incredibly overwhelming and horrendous experience, things would be better.” Are you going to make your kids learn the piano? I am so laissez-faire about a lot of things, but in this one sliver of my kids’ existence, I am going to Tiger-Mom out. It can be any instrument, but preferably not the bassoon…no offense to bassoon players. What natural talent do you hope your kids were born with? I hope that they have a confidence about them and that they aren’t fearful about saying “no” to people—and I don’t mean that in a creepy way. I mean that I hope they love themselves, and that they have an inner fortitude to express themselves and get what they want out of life. Whatever it happens to be that they want, I hope they have the gusto to know they can have that. What makes you laugh? My kids make me laugh, my husband makes me laugh, my “unit” makes me laugh harder than everything. It brings me joy. Look at me…I’m close to tears now. If you didn’t have kids, what would you be doing tonight? Trying to figure out a way to have kids, probably. Before we had kids, Jason and I would go on so many walks—we walked and walked and talked and talked. We still sort of do that, but now we do it sitting. For a peek at more images From our cover shoot with samantha Bee, visit newyorkFamily.com www.newyorkfamily.com

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LOve

STORIeS Inspired By This Month Of Romance, We Asked Four Local Writers To Reflect On Marriage, Parenting And What’s Love Got To Do With It

It Makes Sense—On Paper By Nicole Blades Back when I was the Sex & Relationships editor at a women’s magazine, I would often have to consult experts—psychoanalysts, therapists, PhDs, marriage coaches, sociologists—to get their weigh-in on one couples’ issue or another. I would secretly roll my eyes whenever they predictably offered up this tired tip: When you don’t see eye to eye, sit down with your guy, a pen and some paper and write it down. My frustration with this advice was that it was unrealistic. There’s a standoff in your relationship? Break out the legal pad! That’s not how couples communicate. We talk it through, with words coming out of our mouths. We don’t need some jotted down notes to help us bring our feelings into finer focus. But recently, I had to step down from my high horse. My husband and I had an argument. Truth be told, it was more like one of those not-really-speaking-except-maybe-a-clipped-goodnightbefore-giving-you-a-chilly-shoulder deals. Even more honest, it was my fault. I had gotten tangled up in my list of Gotta-Dos and I let generosity and tenderness slip away from an evening that had all the elements of being just lovely. It was not just any evening, by the way. It was December 18, our First Date-iversary. The next day, feeling horrible about how it all ended, I turned to our paper. It’s a set of papers, actually, held together in a slim, white binder. It’s our wedding. My husband’s aunt, the wise and kind woman who married us over five years ago, printed out our entire ceremony and bound it together for us. There are no pictures, just words. Meaningful ones. It was a sweet gesture, this book of love, but it was also an invaluable gift to our marriage. When I’m struggling to find the language I need to move through a falling-out, I bring out that binder. I re-read our vows, those promises we made to one another, each brimming with aspira-

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tion, inspiration and love. And I find my way to an apology, to an understanding, with my heart repositioned and my kindness levels restored. Who knew there could be such power in words…written down on paper? Nicole Blades is an author, journalist and also the mother of perhaps the most delightful little boy on this spinning globe. Read her blog at msmarymack.com.

The Family Room By Joe Wack My wife and I have been together for nearly eighteen years. Our relationship has grown stronger over that time and our level of intimacy has deepened. We share so much. And yet we’ve always made sure that certain things maintained some sense of mystery. That’s now going out the window. Thanks, potty training. We have not been wildly successful thus far at potty training our son. We’ve got friends whose offspring were trained at eight months (this may be a slight exaggeration) and our son is now three and is still not regularly taking advantage of indoor plumbing. But we’ve reached a point now where our resolve has firmed and we are pulling out all the stops to make continence a reality in continued on page 56 www.newyorkfamily.com

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continued from page 54 our household. We’re keeping the Gold Star Chart in the bathroom. We’re having Pantsless Afternoons regularly. And we’re making an effort to be open with our son about our own use of the facilities. This is not easy for us. We have each, I believe, taken the view of our bathroom as the Fortress of Solitude. We are meant to be alone in there and that’s how we’ve always been. But we’re now trying to show our son how normal and wonderful potty use is. Part of that effort involves leaving the door open sometimes, so he can come by and hang out. This means that we have been boldly going where we’ve never gone before. Here’s hoping our efforts are successful soon, so we can go back to hiding these functions from each other completely. Joe Wack currently teaches science to elementary school children in the Bronx. He writes for New York Family’s Parenting In Progress blog, and lives in Harlem with his wife and three-year-old son.

To Amy/From Fate By Amy Wilson A little more than seventeen years ago, I got on a bus at Port Authority to head back to my hometown for Christmas. There was a guy about my age sitting across the aisle from me. Jeans, baseball hat, cute. (He did not belong on that bus.) He and I stole glances at each other until the second-to-last stop, when we were practically the only people left aboard, our newspapers and crosswords long finished. “Are you going to Scranton?” “Yes…are you?” He was. “But you’re not from Scranton.” He was. We knew a lot of the same people, we had been in the same

doing just the opposite. I have to remind myself to put away the screen, and live. Who knows what I might be missing? Amy Wilson is the author of When Did I Get Like This?. You can read her blog at whendidigetlikethis.com.

Valentine’s Day By Audrey Kaplan I knew the importance of Valentine’s Day even back in first grade. I was asked to decorate a shoebox with construction paper and stickers and bring it into school to put on my desk so my classmates could deposit cards. As the week progressed, I would excitedly glance inside to see the accumulation. Oh the joy! On February 14th right after lunch, Ms. McShirley encouraged us to open our boxes. There were no homemade cards back in 1971 but pre-cut greetings with animated figures on the front. I would tear the envelopes and delicately peel out the precious goods. I got several standard Valentines featuring Spiderman, Charlie Brown and Wonder Woman. But amidst the crowd was something different: a card with a little white kitty cat. This was Michael Bleustein’s card to me—and it was special. He even signed the back with “Love, Michael.” I slept with that card underneath my pillow every night for a month. When you are young, you just want to grow up so you can fall in love and spend Valentine’s Day with the person who makes you feel passionate about life. Hearts, cards, candy, teddy bears, candlelight and romantic dinners are constant reminders letting you know how your love life is progressing. But when you are divorced, raising children, working and “dating on occasion,” Valentine’s Day can make you feel like you are failing in the Love Department. I know, because I have been there. But love does not come wrapped in a Valentine or a heartshaped box filled with chocolates that are sometimes leftover from last year’s shipment. Love is your child’s smile. Love is the people you work with who tell you how lucky they are to be a part of a company you have created. And love is friends who might not spend February 14th with you, but want to spend other days talking and laughing about everything under the sun. As Valentine’s Day approaches, I am more grateful at the age of 45, than any other year. I will go to work wearing a bright red turtleneck with heart earrings, and I will bring some fresh chocolates to share with everyone. I will go out to lunch with friends, maybe get a massage after work and come home and curl up on the couch and watch a good TV show with my son, and be thankful for what I have. It may not be what I dreamed of when I was in first grade, but it’s pretty darn close.

“But love does not come wrapped in a Valentine or a heart-shaped box filled with chocolates that are sometimes leftover from last year’s shipment.” room dozens of times, but somehow our paths had never crossed until that moment. When you go all the way to New York City to meet a guy who grew up two miles away from you, you have to think that fate has handed you a great present. And the more time that has gone by, the more unlikely our meeting that day seems. If we were on that bus today, we’d never meet at all; we’d be tip-tapping on our tiny keyboards, totally Preoccupied and Busy and Important, missing what was right next to us. I count my lucky stars that I got on that bus without anything to keep me from being in the moment—not even a mid90s Walkman (probably out of batteries). These days, I can barely survive an elevator ride past the sixth floor without a furtive check of my iPhone—and while that makes me feel more connected to the world around me, it’s probably

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Audrey Kaplan is the founder of Applause New York, a music and drama school offering classes for kids ages 1-18 years. For more info, visit applauseny.com. www.newyorkfamily.com

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A Valentine’s DAY LYSST Posh Gifts That Will Steal Your Heart BY LYss sterN When it comes to Valentine’s Day, it’s the thought that counts—and shouldn’t it be romantic? If you need some help thinking of fun and playful gifts to give this year, here are a few of my favorites.

iHome Retro Boombox The perfect present for an old school mama with a new school iPod who loves to rock out. $199.99, ihomeaudio.com

Stila Love At First Blush Palette Let cheeks do the talking with this tri-color palette embossed with endearing hearts. $14, stilacosmetics.com

Anthony Logistics For Men Spice Body Cleansing Gel A hint of fresh, a hint of spice—made just for Dad this V-Day. $35, anthony.com

Sweethearts Jewelry Pendant With Diamonds Treat yourself to a piece of fine jewelry based on the iconic Valentine’s Day candy. $399.99, sweetheartsjewelry.com

olivia+joy Luxe Wristlet Mom will be sure to stand out with this gift of glittering sequins. $58, oliviaandjoy.com

Lifetherapy Flirt Pulse Point Oil Roll-On Perfume A fragrance that’s so innocent and playful, it’ll put the fun back in flirt (with your significant other, of course!). $38, lifetherapy.com

Lyss Stern, a New York City mom of two, is the founder of Divamoms.com.

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Baked By Melissa Valentine’s Day Minis Cupcake lovers and chocoholics can enjoy Baked By Melissa’s heart-inspired sweets in red velvet and chocolate with special toppings. $10/dozen, bakedbymelissa.com

Jacques Levine Slippers A way to stay stylish while relaxing or entertaining at home. $98, jacqueslevine.com www.newyorkfamily.com

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WORDS of WISDOM Six Experts Share Their Ideas And Advice For Making A Marriage Better BY SHARON BEESLEY Yes, it’s February—the month we commonly associate with celebrating love. But between keeping your life organized (read: sane) and keeping the kids happy (read: not crying), this lovey-dovey time of year might feel far from blissful. So we asked six experts to share their thoughts on marriage, communication, respect, generosity and making a relationship last. We adore their candid and honest advice—and hope it lends some perspective to your own romantic relationships this Valentine’s Day, and beyond.

“With a newborn, it’s easy to get lost in parenting and forget about being a good partner. One key ingredient in making our marriage better after having children was being persistent and consistent about having ‘date night’ once per week. We began our weekly tradition right after our son was born and never looked back.” Lance Somerfeld NYC Dads Group • No Holds Barred: Don’t make rules because rules get broken. Marriage is [a] compromise, not a dictatorship. • Respect: Never berate your partner in front of others—if you disapprove of something, respect your partner enough to speak about your disapprovals privately and kindly, without judgment. • The Emotional & Physical Bank Accounts: Always have a surplus, never be in debt—because if you aren’t making your partner feel special and worthy, someone else will. • The Mirror: Children are your best mirror, if they are being unkind to others, chances are, they are picking up negativ-

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ity in the household. A positive household makes for a positive marriage. • Know Your Flaws: Everyone has them, so fess up and take criticism like a grown-up. Nobody’s perfect, and you have to be willing to accept that there are things everyone could change about themselves in order to better a relationship. Lori Zaslow and Jennifer Seda Zucher, Founders of Project Soulmate “Before kids: conversations over candlelight, after: silence by nightlight. Parenting responsibilities shift the natural balance of the way things were in the marriage, time for communication lessens and can leave each partner feeling that their own needs are left out of the mix. A great weekly exercise: create space for a ﬁve-minute chat during which you each ask one small thing of the other like take out the garbage, dry cleaning, recyclables, sleep in for an extra thirty minutes; make the morning coffee, watch a favorite program (uninterrupted). It can be anything. Just start small, and most important, honor each other’s one request for that week.” Renee Sullivan Parent Coach and Director of babybites Support Groups “You and your mate are not two halves of a whole. Rather, you are two wholes who are interconnected to form a team. That does not mean you have to share all the same tastes in food, movies, music, friends, etc., or always feel that ‘cosmic’ sense of wonder and awe in each other’s presence. Don’t attempt to coerce him or her into experiencing the world the same way you do. Respect the differences, learn from or at least

tolerate them. ‘We’ is ‘we’ but also still ‘you’ and ‘me.’ Sherry Amatenstein LCSW Author of The Complete Marriage Counselor: Relationship-Saving Advice from America’s Top 50+ Couples Therapists “When you angrily call your spouse ‘crazy,’ ‘stupid,’ or ‘naive,’ you are undercutting a basic tenet of healthy communication, the art of validation. It is far more helpful to say ‘I understand completely how you arrived at that belief. I really get how passionate you feel about it. While I don’t agree with you right now, I am going to try real hard to see it through your lens.’ Thus...validation.” Barry Lubetkin PhD ABPP Director and Founder of Institute for Behavior Therapy New York City “There’s a lot to be said for preventative medicine. So many couples wait for a crisis to go to couples therapy, but often by then too much damage has been done. A brief couples treatment—think ten sessions—can help concerned (but not yet enraged) spouses get past the feelings that are keeping them at a distance and making their relationship less satisfying than it might be. Get a referral from someone you trust.” Darcy Lockman Clinical Psychologist in practice in New York City

FOR MORE ON HOW TO BUILD A FULFILLING ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIP, CHECK OUT “CHARTING THE HEART” AT NEWYORKFAMILY.COM. www.newyorkfamily.com

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The Cure For The Common Hospital From World-Class Prenatal Care To First-Rate Food Allergy Research, The City’s Top Hospitals Always Keep Family At The Forefront By Whitney Casser and Kat Harrison

Beth Israel Medical Center The Comprehensive Epilepsy Center Steven Wolf, MD, Director; & Patricia McGoldrick, NP, MPA, MSN What inspired you to create The Comprehensive Epilepsy Center at Beth Israel? The need to have a family- and childfriendly center where care is coordinated between disciplines, where patients have access to their providers and where there is continuity of care from the office and clinic to the hospital and home. These families are stressed, worried and need a group of specialists who understand what it is like to be a parent with a child with a seizure disorder. What is a typical work day like for you? We round in the hospital in the early AM, visiting the epilepsy monitoring unit and the ICUs and then see patients in the offices. We return to the hospital before we leave at the end of the day. We have offices in Manhattan and Westchester and a big Developmental Disability Center at Roosevelt Hospital. The day is long—most days 7am to 7pm.

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Why should a parent with an epileptic child come to Beth Israel? So that the seizures can be controlled and the other problems can be solved— the attention and learning issues, etc. We [also] manage all the patients ourselves, we review the tests, perform the tests. The same team does everything so the care is not fragmented. No question is left unanswered—our families need to feel comfortable and confident that their doctors are listening and understand the issues they are experiencing as well as the fears they have. What’s in the future for the center? We are creating the ability to get some testing done at home. Plus, expanding our offices in Brooklyn, Queens and Long Island so families don’t have to travel so far for office visits. First Avenue at 16th Street, 212-4202000, wehealny.org.

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Pediatric Neuro-Oncology And Neuroblastoma Team Dr. Kim Kramer, Associate Member of the Department of Pediatrics

What is a typical work day like for you? Every day has its unique challenges and opportunities. Some days I may see patients in our vibrant outpatient clinic from opening to closing. Other days are spent with patients in the busy inpatient unit. Others involve teaching and mentoring medical students, residents and new fellows. What services do you offer that make a difference for children and families? The Department of Pediatrics has wonderful support services that get our patients and their families through the most difficult times… The Child Life Specialists are the most talented, resourceful and insightful group of people. And our teachers not only help children maintain academic excellence, but I’m convinced that they excel from their peers because they get such specialized care… There’s also a terrific specialized Long-Term Follow-Up Team that helps our patients and families well after the oncologic issues are a thing of the past. What makes a great cancer treatment center? [It] has to have expert multidisciplinary teams working together as one. They have to be researching and implementing newer, more effective, more February 2012 | New York Family

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What lies in the cancer center’s future? What I hope lies in my future is more of what happened to me this past week—I received a special phone call and email from a former patient of mine. We met when she was a toddler going through some grueling treatments for a very aggressive cancer. And her call was to let me know of her early acceptance into a prestigious college of her choice. We really want this joy to be a part of every child’s future! 1275 York Avenue, 212-639-2000, mskcc.org/pediatrics.

Mount Sinai Medical center the Jaffe Food allergy institute Hugh a. Sampson, Md Professor of Pediatrics director What interests you about the study of food allergies, specifically in children? Food allergies have more than doubled during my lifetime in practice and now affect over four million children in the U.S. I am very interested in understanding the underlying reasons why allergies occur and to develop therapies to reverse them. What specific services distinguish the Jaffe Institute from other hospitals? In addition to having outstanding pediatric allergists and the latest standard tests for food allergies, we provide oral food challenges—which are the “gold standard” for diagnosing food allergy—have several research diagnostic tests that may provide more information about the severity and natural history of a child’s food allergy, and the opportunity to enter into a number of clinical trials now ongoing to treat food allergy. In addition, physicians at the Jaffe Institute are experts in treating all forms of allergy, including atopic dermatitis, asthma, allergic rhinitis and drug allergy. What types of food allergies do you see most often in your patients? Allergic reactions to milk, egg, peanuts and various tree nuts are the most common.

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Dr. Kim Kramer with some of her patients. What keeps you practicing at Mount Sinai? Mount Sinai provides a collaborative environment where basic scientists, translational investigators and clinical practitioners communicate and work together to develop better methods of diagnosing and treating children with various disorders. It also provides the infrastructure and ancillary support services that makes developing new therapies more likely. We [also] have one of the most active research programs on food allergy in the world and are always looking for patients and families interested in participating in clinical trials. We have a highly skilled and experienced staff [that] cares deeply about every patient that we work with. Share a stand-out success story. Every family who enters our clinic distressed and demoralized by their child’s food allergy diagnosis and then walks out understanding their child’s problem and empowered to deal with it, is a success story. One Gustave L. Levy Place, 212-2416500, mssm.edu.

new York downtown HoSPital division of cardiology atul Sharma, Md chief What drew you to the study of cardiology? I decided to become a doctor after my mother passed away from breast cancer

Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center

tolerable treatments that can still tackle the challenging conditions that, unfortunately, remain all too common.

when I was 15. The care she received— and, sometimes, didn’t receive—was the driving force in my decision. What are some unique characteristics of your division? Our division is a close-knit family. All of the doctors, medical professional and support staff know and like each other, and I think that makes for a much better patient experience—patients know we all have a good time at work and I think that makes them feel better when they leave our offices. From a medical perspective, we are a division that is focused on the prevention, early detection and early treatment of heart disease. We use advanced screening techniques to detect subclinical disease and then focus on lifestyle modification to alter the progression of the disease. We take a multi-faceted approach to treatment—focusing on things that patients themselves can do (customizing diet and exercise plans, taking certain supplements, stress management and reduction) as well as pharmacologic therapies when needed. Why should a family choose New York Downtown for treatment? In my opinion, New York Downtown offers the best of all worlds— local, community care in a friendly environment where everyone knows your name. [Plus] a newly designed, modern facility with state-of-the-art care, equipment and testing. www.newyorkfamily.com

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available in the waiting area to help the patients look forward to coming to New York Eye and Ear Infirmary for their exams and to be better adapted to participating in their own care. 310 East 14th St., 212-979-4000, nyee.edu.

NewYork-PreSbYTerIaN/ morgaN STaNleY Children’s hospital kevin hammeran Senior Vice President and Chief operating officer

Department offers state-of-the-art care for all childhood eye disorders and for adult strabismus—eye muscle disorders and/ or double vision. The New York Eye and Ear Infirmary, in general, and the Pediatric Ophthalmology and Strabismus Department, specifically, offer the almost unique opportunity for patients to get the care of many leading subspecialists in ophthalmology at the same time. In other places, trying to get many different subspecialists in the same operating room at the same time is either very hard or impossible.

How is Children’s Hospital different from other children’s health centers in the city? There are actually a couple of differences at the national level. One is [that] we’re really a women’s and children’s hospital and if you look around the country, a number of the other children’s hospitals are starting to realize how important high-risk maternity care is to them… Also, we have a very high case-mix index—a numeric value for each admission. A simple admission gets a low number and a complex admission gets a high number… We’re usually either the number one or the number two hospital in the nation in terms of getting a very high case-mix index.

What types of services do you offer children and families? The department offers a wide range of therapeutic options including surgery, glasses, prisms, eye patches, medications and exercises. It is very important for visual rehabilitation in children to be done in a timely manner as children can develop amblyopia (lazy eye).

Can you tell me about the new ER that opened up this past summer? We have a $50 million gift from the Cohen family and we used that to develop the new Emergency Department here at the Children’s Hospital, and it’s about four times the size of our old space. It’s certainly capable of handling at least double the clients—there’s nothing like it in the city.

And how do you work with families specifically? As an educational center, we are quite focused on making sure the families understand the problems that their children and other family members have and that they understand the possible treatment options available to them. We have a social services department that helps the family get started in any early intervention programs or special services programs that the patient may need. For patients with pediatric glaucoma, we have art therapists

How do you foster a family-oriented atmosphere in your hospital? We have what we call the Family Resource Center right off the main lobby, which really serves two purposes. It’s a place where families can get some respite… It’s also an educational resource. We actually staff it with consumer librarians. The idea then is that if a family really wants to find some additional information, maybe about the child’s disorder, or they need to do a little research of some kind, they can come down there and get as-

Morgan Stanley Children’s Hospital What does the future hold for your hospital? For 2012, we will be offering what we think is a unique service for the Downtown community called the Physician’s Exercise and Fitness Program. The program starts with a consultation with one of our cardiologists and then includes a diagnostic fitness test, custom-tailored exercise program after working with our exercise physiologist, and a dietary consultation. This will be performed in our new Moody’s Foundation Center Cardiac Rehabilitation and Fitness Center, opening in the second quarter of 2012. 170 William Street, 212-312-5000, downtownhospital.org.

The New York eYe aNd ear INfIrmarY

department of Pediatric ophtalmology and Strabismus dr. Steven rosenberg associate director How is the New York Eye and Ear Infirmary, and the Pediatric Ophthalmology and Strabismus Department specifically, different from other eye and ear centers? These days there are not that many free-standing eye and ear hospitals left. The New York Eye and Ear Infirmary serves as the fail-safe mechanism for eye care in the New York metropolitan area. The Pediatric Ophthalmology and Strabismus

www.newyorkfamily.com

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sistance from a professional librarian… We see the family as a participating member of our team. 3959 Broadway, 1-800-245-KIDS, childrensnyp.org.

Sloane HoSpital for Women neWYork-preSbYterian/ morgan StanleY

Children’s Hospital/Columbia the Center for prenatal pediatrics and the maternal fetal medicine program Dr. mary D’alton Chair of the Department of ob/gYn What do you like about working at the Sloane Hospital for Women? What I enjoy most is the collaborative set of skills that we have among the doctors there, that is ultimately [needed] to give the best care to patients. In a nutshell, if you have a baby who is suffering from a birth defect, or has congenital heart disease…no one doctor can look after that family. It takes a team of obstetricians, maternal and fetal medicine physicians, geneticists, pediatric cardiologists, pediatric cardiac surgeons and neonatologists and having that whole team work together for the family—[that’s] truly special for me. How is the Center for Prenatal Pediatrics and the Maternal Fetal Medicine Program different from other centers? We see the breadth and depth of women’s healthcare. Whether she be a child who has a gynecological problem at age six, or a lady who is in her eighties and has cancer. Our goal is that we will offer the best care to women at all stages of their lives, no matter what the problem is. What’s unique about our program, in my experience, are the kinds of patients we have. Are there any patients that stick out in your memory? We do 7,000 deliveries and more than 2,000 surgeries, so you can imagine the number of patients we see… One that comes to mind is a patient of mine that I had seen and followed closely throughout her pregnancy who had delivered twins at 23 weeks. And she has been so challenged and yet has had some wonderfully happy

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days with her girls, and she’s emailed me photographs that give me both joy and pain. Pain that we couldn’t prolong her pregnancy for longer, and joy that they’re here with us and doing as well as you could possibly imagine. Are there any future projects you’re excited about? I want to develop a women’s urogynecology practice and further expand our women’s cancer program. We’ve also just initiated a pediatric gynecology program… This is where we need to be to serve the women and the children in the city. 16 East 60th Street, 212-305-3101, columbiaobgyn.org.

neWYork-preSbYterian HoSpital/Weill Cornell meDiCal Center

komansky Center for Children’s Health Dr. gerald loughlin Chair and pediatrician-in-Chief What was the goal of opening the Komansky Center? What we’ve done, and have gotten strong support from NewYork-Presbyterian Hospital, is create the environment of a children’s hospital within the bigger Weill Cornell Medical Center [community]. So we carved out the space to make it child- and family-friendly and we always make sure the special needs of children are addressed even though we’re a part of this larger hospital that takes care of adults of all shapes and sizes.

How do you feel the center has grown? We’ve grown in a number of ways. One is increase in people wanting to come here and I think that reflects the quality of the care. For example, last year our emergency room saw over 18,000 patients. When I started in 2002, we were probably seeing around 10,000 or 11,000 patients a year. We’re seeing great growth in the clinical services. Tell me about some of the new programming at Komansky. There are very few places that are able to assess the various motility disorders— the gastrointestinal track—that can affect children. This year, we recruited a young physician, Thomas Ciecierega, who’s had specific training in assessing children with motility disorders from the very top of the esophagus, which is the first feeding tube, down to the intestines and out the other end. And he’s already started evaluating children who have been referred in. We are [also] about to launch a new program in sleep disorders. Why should a family choose Weill Cornell as their hospital? From the very beginning, what we wanted to do was attract great doctors. So over the last nine years, we’ve recruited around 85 to 90 physicians to the faculty of Weill Cornell and the Komansky Center. The driving force was to make sure that we provide the highest quality care to patients in the safest environment. We have great doctors, we have a program that’s focused—even inside this big hospital—on

The Jaffe Food Allergy Institute at Mount Sinai Medical Center. www.newyorkfamily.com

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nyfNYUSummerProgram1202:Layout 1

Does Your Child Suffer From Anxiety?

12/21/11

9:42 AM

Page 1

Attention! That’s what kids with ADHD want.

If so, and he or she is between the ages of 8 and 15, your child may be eligible to participate in a FREE research psychotherapy treatment study at the Weill Cornell Medical College that uses no medications. For more information, please call BARBARA MILROD, M.D. at 212-746-5868

And that’s exactly what they’ll get at NYU Summer Program for Kids, the only evidence-based summer treatment program in New York, specifically tailored to meet the needs of children between the ages of 7 and 11 with ADHD. The program is directed by nationally recognized clinicians who are leading experts in their field. It is a premier program attracting families from across the country and around the world. • • • • •

Behavioral techniques used to promote positive behavior Development of social and academic competence Nurturing and fun atmosphere Swimming and group sports daily Highly qualified staff of psychologists, teachers, and psychology undergraduates and graduate students • Excellent staff/child ratio of 1 to 1-2 • Seven weeks, starting the last week of June NYU Summer Program for Kids prepares children to start the school year as better adjusted and more socially skilled students. Parents also receive specialized training to make the most of their child’s summer experience.

For more information, please call 212.263.0760 or visit us on the web at www.aboutourkids.org

Because There’s So Much to See and Do in New York…

he New York Eye and Ear Infirmary is one of the recognized leaders in eye, ear, nose and throat care. Serving New York since 1820, we have more than 500 affiliated physicians throughout the tri-state area and we are part of all major health plans, HMOs and PPOs. America’s first specialty hospital, with board certified specialists in: n Ophthalmology n Otolaryngology/Head & Neck Surgery n Plastic & Reconstructive Surgery

● Related areas such as the Ear Institute and its pediatric Hearing & Learning Center,

Hearing Aid Dispensary, Orthoptics, Sleep Lab, Allergy and Pain Management ● For extra convenience wherever you live or work, satellite offices for

Ear-Nose-Throat care in: n Chinatown: 128-138 Mott St., 212-343-8399 n Wall St. area: 65 Broadway, 212-514-6933 n Upper East Side: 1430 Second Ave., 212-535-2298

For both Eye & Ear-Nose-Throat Care: n Tribeca: 77 Worth St., 212-966-3901 n Williamsburg:

101 Broadway, Brooklyn, 718-384-6933

n Columbus Circle: 200 West 57th St., 212-957-6933

For information call 1-800-449-HOPE (4673) The New York Eye and Ear Infirmary 310 East 14th St., New York, NY 10003

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www.nyee.edu

Co ns i th ste n A e m B tly e es r & rica t H an os ke W b d or y p ld U. ita am ls Re S. o N po e in ng rt ws

For Allergy and Vascular Birthmarks:

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children and families. And with any problem that shows up, we have the wherewithal to deal with it. 525 East 68th St., 212-746-5454, nyp.org.

NYU LaNgoNe MedicaL ceNter Pediatric Neurosurgery Jeffrey H. Wisoff, Md director What keeps you at NYU Langone? First and foremost, the people. I’ve made most of my life choices based upon where I [thought] I’d be working with good people. One of the wonderful things about NYU is that it has been able to successfully marry cutting edge technology with a little bit of that small town feel that a community hospital has. What types of patients do you typically treat? We run the full gamut from relatively benign things that cause parents incredible distress to life-threatening conditions including brain tumors and head injuries. The most common thing that we see is babies with asymmetric heads—from sleeping on your back and not moving side to side. What do you love about practicing pediatrics? Congenital problems don’t end when you hit 18. So once a child comes under our care, we consider ourselves pediatric and congenital neurosurgeons. It’s only when the kids hit 18 or 21, in a traditional children’s hospital, they’re cut loose. And they’re taken on by adult practitioners who may or may not have the same skills or have the family-centric philosophy. Here, by having a continuity of care, we’re able to give our 20-year-olds who are now people in their late 30s, the same sort of attention they received when they were children. What made you want to practice pediatric neurosurgery in the first place? I like [that] you see children forever and you get to follow them—you have a little bit of a primary care doctor within you. I discovered that I could marry what I thought was a humanistic and peoplecentric attitude with the technical expertise of neurosurgery. Relating to families is

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The Komansky Center for Children’s Health at Weill Cornell Medical Center. incredibly rewarding. It was rewarding before I had children and it was absolutely remarkable when I had my own. 550 First Ave., 212-263-7300, med.nyu.edu.

St. LUke’S-rooSeveLt HoSPitaL ceNter

the vascular Birthmark institute (vBi) of New York alejandro Berenstein, Md & Milton Waner, Md, co-Founders; Francine Blei, Md, Medical director What do you enjoy most about working in your field? Working in the field of vascular lesions is one of the most challenging, but also one of the most satisfying experiences. We deal with vascular lesions, facial deformities that can produce significant disability and functional impairments such as vision loss, hearing deficits, speech and/ or swallowing problems, so the ability to improve the facial deformities, re-establish functionality and external appearances of these children who have suffered with these disfiguring problems can be one of the biggest rewards that any physician could ask for. What makes VBI so unique? [One thing that is] special and unique to our institute is that not only do we attend to the medical, technical and scientific aspects of the management of

our patients, but we place [just] as much emphasis on the human aspect of these diseases: how they affect the individual patient and family members. In most cases, these diseases affect the entire nuclei of the family and so we address the whole picture with the patient and family members. We are supportive also of the human elements of treatment, which includes Child Life Specialists, emotional therapy, even interaction with different animals. We also put great emphasis on support groups of patients with similar types of problems, or families with similar types of children. How does VBI work with families specifically? Contrary to most typical hospital environments, the Vascular Birthmark Institute does not have “visiting hours.” Parents can stay and sleep with the child. Parents are not turned away from the room when the physicians and/or the clinical personnel make rounds. We believe that it is important that the parents participate and actually get involved in the management of their relatives, including the feeding of the patient, changing of dressings, or other activities that will make it a more acceptable integration with not only the family, but the clinical staff and the patients. 126 West 60th Street, 212-636-3977, vbiny.org. www.newyorkfamily.com

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Come Play Yoga at Karma Kids Yoga!

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h o m e a n d away

on the market

DOWNTOWN DIGS

Four Modern Apartments Below Houston And A Cut Above BY ElizaBEth RaYmoNd While Manhattan’s Upper West and East Sides are notably perfect for growing fams, there is a wealth of family-friendly buildings downtown that also fit the bill. We’ve done some scouting and found four fabulous finds for the urban clan. Check out these downtown digs. 354 Broadway, Unit 7 D’ARTE HOUSE | Tribeca The D’Arte House boasts more than just a swanky location. Floor to ceiling windows allow you to bask in natural sunlight and enjoy a stunning city view. The 12-foot high ceilings and wood burning fireplace make it both spacious and cozy. Features include a state of

the art chef’s kitchen, master bedroom with its own private bath, terrace and sitting area. This two-bedroom is within walking distance of six schools and plenty of entertainment. Asking Price: $2,900,000 Maintenance/CC: $1,935 Agent: John Gomes, Prudential Douglas Elliman, 212-727-6178

99 John Street, Unit 301 99 John Deco Lofts | Financial District This two-bedroom, two-bath luxury loft boasts soaring 11- to 14-foot ceilings and a gourmet kitchen with stainless steel appliances and lacquer cabinetry. Bathrooms contain marble countertops and floors. The 27-story building features a landscaped roof deck, fitness center and resident’s lounge with billiards, flat screen televisions and iPod docking

stations. Families can appreciate amenities including a 24-hour concierge service, bicycle storage, onsite parking garage, valet and laundry service. Plus, residents can take in views of the East and Hudson Rivers. Asking Price: $1,250,000 Maintenance/CC: $814 Agent: Christian Gonzalez and Tali Berzak, Nest Seekers International, 212-217-9999

70 Little West Street, Unit 4G The Visionaire | Battery Park City With its tree-lined streets and waterfront view, this Battery Park City abode is absolutely idyllic. It comes with two bedrooms, a separate dining room and built-in office for working from home. The master bedroom has motorized blinds with black out shades— perfect for sleeping late or mid-day naps with

your little one. And the 12-foot aquarium of tropical fish that greets you in the lobby seals the deal. Families can enjoy long walks along the Hudson or head to nearby Tribeca galleries for a little weekend culture. Asking Price: $1,390,000 Maintenance/CC: $1,727 Agent: Elaine Clayman, Brown Harris Stevens, 212-906-9353

176 Broadway, Unit 10D Financial District This renovated apartment lies in the heart of the Financial District and offers an open kitchen, two bedrooms and 1.5 bathrooms. It has an additional area that easily transitions into an office space, along with a full river view, an amazing roof deck and a laundry facility. The

kitchen is brand new with stainless appliances, wood cabinets and a large pantry for storage. Even better, central air is included with the maintenance fee and pets are allowed. Asking Price: $839,000 Maintenance/CC: $1,992 Agent: Ronnie Russo Landau, Corcoran, 212-848-0494

PRICES ON ALL PROPERTIES AS OF JANUARY 11, 2012. FOR MORE TIPS ON REAL ESTATE AND DESIGN FOR FAMILIES, SIGN UP FOR OUR WEEKLY E-NEWSLETTER AT NEWYORKFAMILY.COM.

New York Family | February 2012

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how they live

By Bringing A Hip Sensibility To Kids Clothes, Brooklyn Couple Harald and Lynn Husum Have Made Appaman A Global Phenom BY ANgelA JohNsoN

Andrew schwartz

Without a business plan, experience in fashion or even children of their own at the time, Brooklynites Lynn and Harald Husum set out to translate their love of pop culture and style into a cool clothing line for kids. The idea came to the couple on a whim after seeing a father and son dining together at a Manhattan restaurant.

“The dad was wearing an AC/DC t-shirt and the kid had a teddy bear t-shirt. We thought it would be funny if the shirts were switched, and the kid was wearing the rock t-shirt,” Lynn recalls. The idea seemed pretty far-fetched for Lynn, a nurse practitioner at the time, and Harald, a graphic designer, but the couple began dyeing tiny tees in their own apartment and before they knew it, their business had outgrown their home. Today, Appaman is their world and it has evolved into a funky brand that is a favorite of city-dwelling parents and their kids. Looking back, almost everything about Appaman pays homage to the past. The unique name and monkey logo comes from one of Harald’s cherished childhood toys from his native Norway. And many of the clothes in the collection are updated interpretations of classic styles from the 70s and 80s, such as a B-boyinspired tracksuit and skinny acid wash jeans for girls.

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Andrew schwartz

Monkey Business

Today, the Husum family includes two daughters and they are loving Brooklyn life. Lynn and Harald’s eclectic yet comfortable design aesthetic can be found not only in the garments they design but also imprinted throughout the two-bedroom Carroll Gardens apartment they share with Kaya, 8 and Elie, 5—and a lovable Cockapoo affectionately known as “Party Hat.” The walls of the bright, open kitchen are adorned with a collage of family photos and children’s artwork, while the living room shelves are lined with pieces collected during Lynn and Harald’s backpacking adventures through Southeast Asia and Africa. Harald excitedly points to a cow mask on the shelf. “We bargained for three days in Nepal for this!” As you make your way upstairs to the bedrooms, tiny frames filled with photos of Lynn and Harald’s families honor their diverse backgrounds. But the main attraction of the second level is, without a doubt, the girls’ bedroom, which Dad proudly designed. The bunk beds, cheerful pastel walls and bold decals create a whimsical haven for the youngest members of the design-inclined family. Unlike many city families, the Husums declare themselves as living in a one-computer home, which helps them avoid the temptation of social networking. Instead, the family prefers spending time together engaging in good old-fashioned fun—watching movies, playing board games and belting out favorite tunes on their karaoke machine. They take full advantage of their backyard, hosting barbeques for friends in the neighborhood. Though you might not guess it now, Lynn and Harald’s move to Brooklyn happened by chance. After renting in Manhattan, the pair decided they were ready to buy their first home equipped with outdoor space. A chance visit with a friend to a psychic in Brooklyn Heights proved to Lynn that there was life on the other side of the bridge. She took one look around the neighborhood and immediately fell in love. “[Brooklyn] was so much mellower. I had no idea that it looked like this,” she says. “It was so cute.” Ten years later, the couple can’t imagine living anywhere else. They enjoy exploring the borough’s diverse neighborhoods. continued on page 74 www.newyorkfamily.com

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For all your cleaning needs 212-371-5555 www.mcmaidnyc.com Manhattan Cleaning Corp. The Name You KNow & TrusT iN maNhaTTaN move-iN/ouT, PosT CoNsTruCTioN, GeNeral,TurNover, CorP. aPTs, eTC. FullY iNs/BoNded

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The New Appaman Showroom continued from page 72 “We love Coney Island and the Vietnamese restaurants in Sunset Park. We always take friends to the Promenade and the Brooklyn Bridge,” Lynn says. “Grimaldi’s is our favorite for pizza.” Similarly, the couple admits that much of Appaman’s success can be credited to a combination of being in the right place at the right time and a lot of opportune networking. Early on, Lynn decided to take a night class at FIT that taught marketing to the children’s wear industry. She studiously gathered industry contacts and honed inexpensive PR techniques. Her efforts would come in handy when she successfully applied what she learned to her growing company’s own marketing strategy. As a result, the line was distributed in 100 stores within the first nine months.

“It’s East Coast design. Our clothes are definitely more Public Enemy than Snoop Dogg.” About a year and a half after their 2003 launch, Appaman received the ultimate tabloid nod when Angelina Jolie’s son Maddox was photographed in their now-famous bulldog t-shirt. Since then, stars like Gwyneth Paltrow, Gwen Stefani and Sarah Jessica Parker have all outfitted their tots in Appaman gear. But even though the brand has become a favorite of A-list celebrity kids, the Husums insist that they design with their daughters and their friends in mind. In fact, most of the kids featured in the Appaman catalogs come directly from their neighborhood. And they refuse to let the market dictate what they consider fashion-

able. Instead, the vibe is inspired by images they see in and around Brooklyn. “Kids clothing doesn’t necessarily have to follow trend. I think there is value in something that looks different,” Lynn says. “It’s East Coast design. Our [clothes] are definitely more Public Enemy than Snoop Dogg,” laughs Harald. “We have no business selling surf boards,” Lynn chimes in. Harald describes the kid who wears Appaman as confident, playful and loud. “I want the Appaman kid to have an attitude, but not in a negative way,” he adds. They acknowledge the difficulty of dressing fussy children in things they don’t want to wear, and have positioned their brand as one that both parents and little ones can agree on. As a result, many parents have actually said that their kids won’t get dressed unless they can find their “monkey clothes.” Looking at the Appaman designs, it’s no surprise that Lynn and Harald pull a lot of inspiration from nostalgic photos and the cutting-edge styles of previous generations. “A lot of parents have come to us and asked if we can make clothes in their size!” Lynn laughs. While most married couples would find it challenging to go into business together, the Husums pride themselves on how well they work together as a team. The pair attributes their entrepreneurial success to having distinct roles and the ability to keep most of the bickering out of their small office space. “In general, I think we do really well together,” Harald says. “We’re able to be creative and sell our product.” And that’s all this couple of Brooklyn designers could ask for. For more Fashion buys From appaman, check out our treats blog at newyorkFamily.com.

a sneak peek at appaman’s spring collection…coming soon to appaman.com 1. Hockey Jersey In Oak Leaf, $36 2. Trenchcoat In Fuchsia, $60 3. Wingskate Racerback Tank Dress, $42 4. Roll Bounce Jacket In Black, $60

New York Family | February 2012

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4 www.newyorkfamily.com

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Not all reviews are created equal

Available wherever books are sold and on ZAGAT.com Zagat.indd 1

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H O M E A N D AWAY

QUALIT Y TIME

FUN AT HOME WITH A BUCKET OF HEARTS, VALENTINE’S DAY SWEETS AND A TOY OF THE YEAR Bucket Of Love

By Tracey Stewart of Moomah As a parent, I love when I find small moments to illustrate “The Golden Rule.” That’s why I love the book, Fill A Bucket: A Guide to Daily Happiness for the Young Child by Carol McCloud, Katherine Martin & David Messing. I designed a craft project for kids that I thought was a nice complement to the book’s feel-good message.

Instructions 1. Find a bucket. (We found ours in the gardening section of our local hardware store.) 2. Decorate the outside of the bucket with hearts using stencils, free-form shapes or even anatomical hearts from old books. 3. Cut out and decorate hearts from colored construction paper to fill your bucket. 5. Write messages on the hearts (see right). 6. Have your child give out the

1 egg yolk 1 tsp. finely grated lemon zest ½ tsp. vanilla extract ½ tsp. almond extract 1 cup unbleached, all-purpose flour ½ tsp. cinnamon ¼ tsp. salt ½ cup raspberry jam, room temperature Confectioner’s sugar for dusting

Linzer Tart Cookies

By Liza Huber of Sage Spoonfuls Yields about 1 dozen My father is from Austria and always made Linzer Tart cookies for us every Valentine’s Day—a tradition I now continue with my own family. Ingredients ½ cup skinned, slivered almonds, toasted 1 stick unsalted butter, room temperature ½ cup granulated sugar

New York Family | February 2012

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Instructions Preheat oven to 350 degrees, spread the almonds on a baking sheet and place it on the center rack. Roast for 3 minutes, rotate almonds and roast for another 3 minutes. Remove from the oven and put the almonds into a bowl to cool. Then, pulverize them in a food processor. Mix the butter, sugar, egg yolk, lemon zest, vanilla extract and almond extract with an electric mixer until smooth and creamy. In a separate mixing bowl, sift together the flour, cinnamon and salt. Add the ground almonds and stir to combine. Add the flour mixture to the butter mixture. Stir

hearts from their Bucket of Love so that they can fill other people’s buckets! Here are a few examples of things you can say to fill someone’s bucket with good feelings: “I love you.” “Would you like to play with me?” “I really like your drawing.” “You make me laugh.” “Thank you!” FOR MORE ON CRAFTING WITH KIDS, SEE NEWYORKFAMILY.COM.

to combine. Turn the dough out on a clean work surface. Separate into 4 equal parts, wrap each in plastic wrap and refrigerate for an hour. Line 2 baking sheets with unbleached parchment paper. Remove one portion of dough from the refrigerator and place between two pieces of parchment or wax paper. Roll with a rolling pin until it’s ¼” thick. Cut out cookies using a cookie cutter. Transfer cookies to baking sheets. Repeat with remaining dough. Using a smaller cookie cutter, cut out and remove the center of the cookies. Bake cookies for 10-12 minutes. Remove from the oven and let cool. Assemble by spreading a thin layer of raspberry jam onto the bottom cookies and dust the top cookies with confectioner’s sugar. Place the cut outs on top of the solid cookies. Enjoy! FOR MORE ON COOKING WITH KIDS, SEE OUR YUMMY DELICIOUS BLOG AT NEWYORKFAMILY.COM.

Toy Of The Year Giveaway! Here’s some indoor fun for the whole fam. The Ohio Art Company brings us the world’s smallest toy building blocks. Nanoblock is a set of multicolored, micro-sized plastic blocks that allows kids ages 8 and up to craft detailed designs like a koala bear, giraffe or tree frog. And nanoblock is giving away five building sets! To enter this giveaway, send us an email explaining why you’d like to win to familygiveaways@ manhattanmedia.com and put “nanoblock” in the subject line. Be sure to include your contact info and address. Deadline to enter is Friday, February 18.

www.newyorkfamily.com

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WHAT ARE YOUR KIDS DOING THIS SUMMER? Renee Flax, director of camper placement of the ACA NY & NJ, will be on hand to answer parentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; questions and help guide them in their search for the right camp!

SATURDAY, MAR 10, 2012

SUNDAY, MAR 11, 2012

Downtown Grace Church School 86 4th Ave. 12PM - 3PM

Park Slope Union Temple 17 Eastern Pkwy 12PM - 3PM

SATURDAY, MAR 31, 2012

SUNDAY, APR 1, 2012

Upper East Side Upper West Side St. Jean Baptiste School Congregation Rodeph Sholom 173 E. 75th St. 7 W. 83rd St. 12PM - 3PM 12PM - 3PM New York Family magazine and the American Camp Association, NY & NJ are teaming up for their winter fairs! Meet dozens of different camp directors from local DAY CAMPS and SLEEPAWAY CAMPS from across the region. Great for children ages 3 to 17!

pre-register at:

Newyorkfamilycamps.com For more info on summer camps:

TheRightCamp.com

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h o m e a n d away

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GettinG Along

How Summer Camp Helps Kids Develop Emotional Intelligence

Matthew and Valerie watch out for Robert as he maneuvers the climbing wall. They yell encouragement, cheering on their friend, who, unlike his cabinmates, struggles daily with juvenile rheumatoid arthritis. On Opening Day, these two teased Robert about his unstable walk and slow progress across the field. Cabin discussions about disabilities, a counselor’s careful example of kindness and respect, and just spending time together have helped the three form a strong friendship.

are actually better predictors of adult success and happiness than traditional IQ scores. In his book Emotional Intelligence, clinical psychologist and author Daniel Goleman makes two important assertions that parents may not find surprising. He reports on new research showing that children whose emotional intelligence skills are well-developed tend to be more successful in school, have deeper and healthier relationships, grow up to have more fulfilling work lives and become valuable and contributing members of their communities. Goleman’s second assertion is that these emotional intelligence skills can be taught. Parents have long tried to teach courtesy and politeness to their children, but were never sure their teaching could overcome inborn capabilities. Parents and teachers have assumed that the patience children display naturally is probably most of the patience they can muster, or that they are good or bad sharers, gentle friends or playground bullies from birth. A group of researchers, led by Howard Gardner, a psychologist at the Harvard School of Education, have proven otherwise. They have shown that thoughtful teaching, conversation, modeling and practice can develop and nurture these skills, especially when that teaching is consistent throughout a child’s day and year.

These children all demonstrate sophisticated skills in areas scientists are suddenly watching closely. Observers are finding that a set of abilities, collectively called emotional intelligence, has much to do with how children grow and succeed. These skills—self-awareness, self-control, empathy, the ability to wait, the ability to listen, cooperate, share and work well with others—

Real Challenges Build Resiliency Great camps have been teaching emotional intelligence since they began. Children away from home, with new friends and new challenges, can learn much about themselves and their own strengths and abilities. Perhaps the canoe doesn’t head where it should at first, continued on page 80

BY Posie TaYlor Jeremy and Tony are excited to go fishing. Their counselor helps them to work out a way to share the one rod fairly without arguing. Their newfound ability to share without anger carries over to their cabin with who will operate the only working flashlight. Sarah’s nature counselor watches with delight to see this shy nine-year-old gently and competently organize her camp friends into teams for a wildflower search. At the beginning of camp, Sarah was too nervous even to express an opinion about whether she preferred hot dogs or burgers on the grill.

New York Family | February 2012

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www.newyorkfamily.com

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explorer camp 2012 JULY 2ND â&#x20AC;&#x201C; AUGUST 3RD

ALL COUNSELORS ARE CERTIFIED TEACHERS

The Mandell Explorer Camp is an opportunity for children ages 3-12 to experience and explore the wonders of summer camp.

STATE OF THE ART FACILITIES

LOW RATIO OF STUDENTS TO CAMP COUNSELORS

EARLY DROP OFF (8:00AM) AND LATE PICK UP (4:00PM) AVAILABLE

Our children will be exposed to a balanced schedule that will allow them to grow physically, mentally and creatively while having a ton of fun. Campers will enjoy action packed days consisting of music, visual arts, athletics, swimming, cooking, technology, drama and chess in a nurturing and relaxed environment. There will be fantastic field trips throughout the summer to destinations such as the Botanical Gardens, the Intrepid Sea, Air and Space Museum. The children will also enjoy all of our special days such as dress up day, pajama day and our bar-b-cue day.

For more information contact summer.camp@mandellschool.org or call 212-222-2925

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four ways To prepare your Child for The Camp Experience focus on education. Camp provides children with the opportunity to explore a much larger world. It also offers parents and children a chance to practice normal, healthy separation, allowing kids to develop autonomy and a stronger sense of self, make new friends, develop new social skills and learn about teamwork. share the prep work. Camp decisions should be made together. When children feel that they are part of the decision-making process, they are more comfortable. As a team, search camps online and take a tour of the camp venue. If your child is going to a resident camp, pack together.

continued from page 78 or a cabinmate is unwilling to be friendly. Away from the familiarity of home and school, campers can test their own perseverance, and with caring and thoughtful help, build new life skills for themselves. Social skills, too, grow exponentially at camp. A campfire marshmallow roast is an exercise in sharing of sticks and the front row around the campfire. When campers take turns carrying the lunch to the top of the mountain, they learn firsthand how wonderful working together can be. A good counselor will gently remind her young hikers of this lesson, not later, but during the climb, when the message is fresh. Teachable Moments At Camp Summer camps work hard to train staff in modeling and teaching emotional intelligence skills. Camp counselors are often closer in age than teachers, and the informal atmosphere of camp encourages relaxed conversations at picnics or getting ready for bed. Plus, there are usually more counselors with the children than in a regular classroom, allowing more interaction than one lone teacher can possibly supply. When children find adult friends at camp who model perseverance, listening, teamwork and appreciation of differences, they set new and high standards for their own behavior. When they feel appreciated and valued by these friends, they are surer of their ability to live happily away from home. Successful camp summers can help smooth the transition to college in later years.

New York Family | February 2012

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Talk, talk, talk. It’s only natural that as the first day of camp approaches, some kids may experience uneasiness. Encourage your child to talk about these feelings. Parents should let their child know that they are confident in their child’s ability to handle being away from home. get real. It’s important for families to maintain realistic expectations. Camp is a microcosm of the real world, so just like life, there will be highs and lows. Remind children that the most important thing is to relax and have fun.

Visit the ACA NY/NJ resource website, campwizard.org or call 1-800-777-CAMP (2267) to speak with a camper placement specialist. Emotional Intelligence Lessons: After Camp And Beyond When campers return home from camp, parents can help them keep building their summer skills throughout the year. Chores are a great teaching opportunity at home, for example. Parents who model working together as a family to get jobs done are reinforcing vital lessons from camp. Empathy means recognizing others’ needs, literally “feeling with” another person. Television reports are full of stories of children who have not been taught to empathize, children who become bullies or delinquents or worse. Parents can use these same TV reports as teaching moments about caring and sympathy. Parents who teach emotional intelligence skills to their kids year-round will find the lessons reinforce each other in wonderful ways. And summer camps, where these lessons have been taught for years, are a key part of the reinforcement. Posie Taylor serves as a board member-at-large of the American Camp Association. She is also the executive director emerita of the Aloha Foundation.

To LEArn MorE ABouT CAMp And ChILd dEvELopMEnT, pLEAsE vIsIT ThE AMErICAn CAMp AssoCIATIon’s fAMILy wEBsITE, CAMppArEnTs.org.

Reprinted from CAMP magazine with permission of the American Camp Association. www.newyorkfamily.com

1/23/12 2:40 PM

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Open House: February 11, 11am–2pm

Free concert with Brett Band for Kids at 10:30am

Upcoming Open Houses: March 3 and March 25, 11am –2pm

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www.buckleycamp.com

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the last word

Crossing the River For As Long As She Could Remember, One Mother Considered New York The City Of Her Dreams...Until It Was No Longer The Right Place For Her Family

By Carol Cain I love New York City—always have, always will. As a child in my grandparents’ Brooklyn brownstone, I used to stare at the streetlights as they gleamed into my window at night, conjuring images of all the things the city had waiting for me. Back then, all I wanted was to be a singer, and the city seemed ripe with adventure and possibility. Most of my memories of growing up in Sunset Park are simple and happy. Hanging out on the playground while friends played handball. Grabbing a slice from the open-window pizza shop. Sitting on the stoop with my best friend. Riding the Cyclone in Coney Island until my head hurt. Still, for reasons I didn’t understand at the time, my parents took me away from it all. First, to the suburbs of New Jersey and then to the Dominican Republic. They often spoke of a life that had more to offer, where I would have more freedom to be a child, but I couldn’t imagine a more perfect place to grow up than New York. I would leave and come back several times between the ages of 9 and 12, before my father made the final decision for us to stay away when street fights and boys became a part of my existence. I would leave one last time at the age of 12 to finish middle and high school. My final memory was that of my first kiss on a Sunset Park bench overlooking the Manhattan skyline. I came back for college, eventually scoring a receptionist position at an international nonprofit that would help pay for my tuition and a one-bedroom apartment in Manhattan. I continued to pursue my dream of becoming a singer through my twenties, and finally sang on stage at the Apollo Theater, at the age of 28, when I

was a finalist for their Amateur Night. What more can I say? New York City has taught me courage and strength of character. It taught me the beauty of diversity, not only in skin color but also in expression, thoughts and ideas. It taught me to dream big. Like my parents before me, I started a family here. Originally, I liked being a parent here so much that I started a blog about it to share the life I built with family and friends as it unfolded. But as time passed, my husband and I started experiencing the challenges that we had heard other parents complain about but we ourselves had chosen to ignore. You know the list—space, education, the cost of doing anything. With all that NYC has to offer, we weren’t getting what we needed most.

“Originally, I liked being a parent here so much that I started a blog about it.”

New York Family | February 2012

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For the longest time, my husband and I didn’t want to admit that the city we love no longer caters to our needs. But our new home in South Orange, New Jersey gives us what we need and then some, and when we need a fix of the city we still love, it’s only a 35-minute train ride away. New York is not just where I am from. In many ways, it is who I am. And I am still excited to explore the city with my children in tow, but our adventures are now like station breaks from the main show—our life in the ‘burbs. Carol Cain blogs about her travel and food adventures in NYC and beyond at NYCityMama.com. www.newyorkfamily.com

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