Make love an evolution

Words JANET McGEEVER

I don’t think there is one person who could argue that we aren’t currently in a wave of revolution. Along with the inevitable changes to our personal, financial, social and political landscape comes the opportunity for not just revolution, but evolution.

I’m fortunate to witness quiet yet powerful evolution often with individuals and couples who are willing to look a little deeper into another aspect of their lives – the sexual. It’s a subject often joked about, glamorised and vilified, but it significantly impacts everyone on the planet because, well, it’s how we came into being isn’t it?

When something like the #metoo movement becomes mainstream, governments begin to increase funding for domestic abuse prevention, organisations form to call out advertisers for sexualised ads, and specialised educators become available to support children growing up in a world swamped with subtle or not-so-subtle sexualised messages. Evolution is most definitely at hand.

How can sexual evolution change your life?

A worldwide authority on conscious sexuality education, Diana Richardson has a radical yet profound view – that all the unrest in the world comes back to sex, to unloving sex, the breakdown between man and woman, male and female, and misunderstanding of the function of sexuality in a relationship.

Whether you agree or not, putting the microscope on our unconscious conditioning around sex is an enlightening experience. By no means exclusive to gender, emotions such as anger, frustration, shame and fear can be common around the issue of sex, which can then lead to depression, despondency, anxiety or, sadly, violence.

It is possible and important to process these emotions and do the healing work. And it’s with a shift in our attitude towards sexuality, turning the concept of what sexuality is on its head, that we start the journey of really stepping forward into being part of this human evolution. Changing how we make love, understanding the depth of our male and female make-up, honouring our natural energy and moving away from tension towards relaxation will transform sex into love.

Instead of always unconsciously reaching for the goal, bring mindfulness to making love. By bringing awareness to our moment-by-moment experience in sex, we slowly become more peaceful individuals. This has certainly changed me as a person, and I have worked with many couples who have completely changed the course of their relationship by making the smallest mindful changes in lovemaking.

At a very fundamental level, I don’t think there’s an evolution more important for humanity, our future generations, or our planet. And I am honoured to play one very small part in that.

Janet is a psychotherapist, speaker and author. She is co-author of Tantric Sex and Menopause, presenter of The Making Love Retreat in Australia and creator of Womantime, Ancient Wisdom for the Modern Day Woman. www.janetmcgeever.com