CN: September 6, 2023

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September 6, 2023

Honoring

Recipe, Movie & Sudoku. Pg. F-1

CLA SSIFIEDS AND HOME & GARDEN. Pg. F-2 /F-3 Moore On Life, Lifestyle & Crossword Puzzle. Pg. F-4

Hazelwood Day at Howdershell

The third annual Hazelwood Day takes place on Saturday, Sept. 9 and invites residents of Hazelwood and beyond to join in on a community celebration. The free family-friendly event will feature activities, games and entertainment.

“For decades, the city hosted the Hazelwood Harvestfest in September,” said Pam Reynolds, assistant director of Hazelwood Parks and Recreation. “While we maintain some of the most popular activities from the Harvestfest, Hazelwood Day is a much dif-

Park

Celebrates the city and its services

ferent event with a focus on highlighting city services.”

The event offers something for everyone to enjoy.

It will open with the Annual Random Draw Partner Horseshoe Tournament and then continue with activities including a balloon artist, children’s story time, a Lego combo bouncer and climber, a mini car show, free bingo and even a “Bubble Bus” to run through and play in.

For music lovers, the Chaz45 Band, offering a mix of R&B, funk, classic rock, pop, blues and top 100 hits will entertain the

crowd in late afternoon, preceding the headlining group the Fabulous Motown Review, with a roster of Motown, disco, R&B and pop tunes.

For foodies there will be a variety of food trucks serving treats from gourmet burgers to Cajun and creole fare.

Though the event will be in held with other concurrent occasions to welcome fall, it still promises to attract a large audience.

“On a pleasant weather day, we can see 3,000 people over the six-hour timeframe of

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Photos courtesy city of Hazelwood Hazelwood Day will take place Sept. 9 at Howdershell Park at 6810 Howdershell Road from 3 – 9 p.m.

Around Town

MoDOT closes I-270 westbound exit ramp to northbound Route 367 for two months

Drivers who regularly use the I-270 westbound exit ramp to northbound Route 367 should be aware that the Missouri Department of Transportation (MoDOT) has closed the ramp for two months, starting Aug. 21. The closure will allow crews to complete the last segment of the northbound fly-over ramp. Signed detours will have traffic exit at Bellefontaine Road and travel west on Dunn Road to access Route 367.

The closure is part of the I-270 North Project’s overall strategy to improve safety within the I-270 North corridor through infrastructure upgrades.

To stay current on the status of this closure and to view a project overview and graphic displays of planned construction, please visit the I-270 North Project website at: www.i270north.org. Travelers can also contact MoDOT’s customer service center at: 314-275-1500 or the I-270 North Project Team at: I270North@modot.mo.gov.

Florissant mayor to host a senior town hall meeting

Senior Coordinator Peggy Hogan and her staff Kathy Biondo, Carol Henke, Cindy Maschmeyer and Mary Mallien and the Florissant Senior Commission have announced that Florissant Mayor Tim Lowery will host a Senior Town Hall Meeting on Sept. 14 at the James J. Eagan Center from 9 to 11 a.m.

Enjoy a complimentary full breakfast with Lowery that is being provided by St. Catherine Retirement Community and Veronica Place. All city department heads will be present to answer any questions or to address any concerns you might have.

Community Organizations will be present to provide valuable information to seniors. This is a free event, but reservations are required by calling the Senior Office at 314-839-7605.

COMMUNITY VOICES:

Low and no cost ways to reduce your utility bills

As someone who is budget conscious, I’m always looking for low or no cost ways to reduce my utility bills. I don’t know about you, but I’m not in a rush to replace all my older appliances that are still in good working order. Fortunately, I’ve been able to incorporate energy efficiency strategies that didn’t cost me anything other than time and effort or less than what I would spend for brunch with mimosas.

Here are some no cost ways to reduce your utility bills:

1. Adjust thermostat settings: Lower your thermostat during winter and raise it in the summer to reduce heating and cooling costs.

2. Embrace natural light: During the day, open curtains and blinds to let in natural light and reduce the need for artificial lighting. Remember to close them at night to insulate against temperature changes.

3. Block the sun: When it’s hot outdoors, you’ll want to close your blinds and curtains to block the sunlight.

4. Unplug electronics: Many electronics consume power even when turned off. Unplug devices or use power strips to completely disconnect them when not in use to eliminate standby power usage.

5. Take shorter showers: Reduce water consumption by taking shorter showers. Consider installing a low-flow showerhead to further reduce water usage.

6. Air dry clothes: Whenever possible, air-dry your clothes instead of using a dryer. Not only does it save electricity, but it also extends the life of your clothing.

7. Cook efficiently: Use lids on pots and pans while cooking to retain heat and

cook food faster. Match the pot size to the burner to avoid wasting energy.

8. Turn off lights and fans: Make it a habit to turn off lights and ceiling fans when leaving a room.

9. Run full loads: When using the dishwasher or washing machine, run full loads to maximize their efficiency and reduce water and energy usage.

10. Use natural ventilation: On cooler days, open windows and use cross ventilation to allow fresh air to circulate through your home, reducing the need for air conditioning. Here are some low-cost ways to reduce your energy bills:

1. Buy a programmable thermostat: Use a programmable thermostat to set temperature schedules that match your daily routines. Many electricity service providers offer rebates for smart and programmable thermostats.

2. Seal air leaks: Check for gaps around doors, windows, and electrical outlets. Use weather stripping and caulk to seal any leaks, preventing air from escaping and reducing the need for heating and cooling.

3. Don’t make your A/C work harder: In the summer, avoid heating up your house as much as possible. Use your oven and do laundry during the coolest times of the day. Consider investing in blackout curtains and blinds to block the summer sunlight.

4. Plant shade trees: Planting shade trees around your home can help reduce cooling costs by blocking direct sunlight during hot summer days.

5. Insulate water heater: Wrap your water heater with an insulating blanket to

minimize heat loss and reduce water heating costs.

6. Fix leaky faucets: A dripping faucet can waste a significant amount of water over time. Repair leaks promptly to save water and lower your water bill.

7. Switch to LED bulbs: Replace traditional incandescent bulbs with energy-efficient LED bulbs. They last longer and use significantly less electricity.

8. Maintain your furnace and cooling units: Change filters consistently and get regular maintenance for your furnace and HVAC units.

For more resources related to weatherization and energy conservation, visit the Missouri Public Service Commission’s website at https://psc.mo.gov/ . You can also contact your local utility service providers online or by phone.

Commissioner Maida Coleman was appointed to the Missouri Public Service Commission by Governor Jay Nixon, effective Aug.10, 2015. She was unanimously confirmed by the Missouri State Senate on Jan. 21. Prior to her appointment, Commissioner Coleman was the Director of the Office of Community Engagement. From 2001 until 2009, Commissioner Coleman served first as a State Representative and then as State Senator from St. Louis, becoming the first African-American woman in state history to serve as Senate Minority Leader. Coleman has a B.A. in Journalism from Lincoln University in Jefferson City and was awarded a Doctor of Humane Letters Degree from Harris-Stowe State University in St. Louis in 2008. A native of Sikeston, Missouri, Coleman lives in St. Louis.

The opinions expressed in this column are the columnist’s alone and do not reflect the opinion of the owners or staff of Community News.

September 6, 2023 • Community News – St. Louis County • www.mycnews.com 2
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Florissant Mayor Tim Lowery will host a Senior Town Hall Meeting on Sept. 14 at the James J. Eagan Center from 9 to 11 a.m. Photo courtesy city of Florissant

Another successful swim year for the Florissant Fish Swim Team

The 2023 summer season marked the 21st season for the Florissant Fish Swim Team. Over the duration of the season the team was 6-0 in dual meets and finished first at the Conference Championships for the 13th straight season.

This year’s team consisted of 164 kids, ranging from four-to-18 years old and featured a group of nine coaches who have either been with the program for all 21 years or graduated as a swimmer of the team before joining the coaching staff.

The swimmers broke two relays and three individual team records and 13-14-year-old Mia Moore broke a 35-year-old conference record in the 50-yard butterfly.

Assistance League of St. Louis Storybook Characters Parade takes place at the Urban League Back-to-School Expo

Welcome, September Still In This Together:

And here it is…finally.

The month I both long for during the incessant heat waves of July, and hate to come because that means it will soon be over and I’ll have to wait a whole year to grasp it in my hands and heart again.

September is my birthday month, as well as the birthday month of both our daughters. Katie was actually born the day before my 30th birthday, and I had always thought it would be wonderful to have our children by the time I was 30; old enough to enjoy them and still young enough to enjoy life after they were grown. It made such a wonderful story until five years later when Becca blessed our lives…at 35.

And yes, we all three celebrate our birthday month, as in, for an entire month, as it should be, just enjoying one birthday after another, leaving sticky notes everywhere as reminders of what month it is, and then closing out the month with one more celebration. It’s a great way to enjoy the best month of the entire year. Might as well throw in a couple of anticipatory weeks while we’re at it, when you can almost feel the excitement building.

I noticed the vibration in the air a few weeks ago as I walked to the mailbox. The noise was loud and insistent, and unmistakably the sound of locusts in broad daylight, the time I always told the kids was the sure harbinger of a new school year right around the corner. The sound of September.

And the colors are beginning…hillsides that begin to lose lush blankets of green and adopt a quieter feel of fewer leaves, thinner foliage, shorter days and quieter night falls. It isn’t a sudden transformation, but sometimes it seems that way if I haven’t been attuned to the subtleties of September.

bright reds and yellows of watermelon and summer corn and ads filled with ice cream and barbecue and picnic gatherings, to the deeper colored offerings of Indian corn, pumpkins and gourds and ads populated with heartier, homespun, lazy afternoon steamup-the-window roasts and homemade breads, baked goods and county fairs.

September changes the page from baseball and swimming pools to football and homework…and home. Another season we haven’t experienced in our new home, filled with shorter days and earlier night falls, sweatshirts and overhead lights in the evenings, indoor gatherings and time for reading, lonely train whistles reverberating through the night and open windows to let in the night air as we sleep.

Before the chaos and wonderment of holidays, there is September. Welcome, wonderful birthday month. Welcome!

Vicki Bahr is an inveterate word lover and story sharer, a published author in magazine, newspaper and blog forms. As a mom of four, grandma of nine, and wife of one for 50 years, she finds that inspiration and wonder are everywhere.

Pete the Cat and other storybook characters, all costumed volunteers from Assistance League of St. Louis, paraded through America’s Center on Aug. 5 to kick off the “Books from Friends” program for the 2023-24 school year.

Following the parade, volunteers hosted a booth at the Urban League Back-to-School Expo. Aspiring young readers who visited the booth received age-appropriate books to take home, with more than 6,200 books being distributed during the expo.

Visitors to the booth also had a chance to meet local guest author Micheal Anderson, whose Zoey Lyndon series is a favorite with middle grade students. Anderson autographed 300 copies of Zoey books and personalized them for the children. All of the books teach life lessons, and the author says she wrote the books so that children who look like her will see characters they can relate to in the books they read.

“We hope the parade and books will help these young people know how much fun reading can be” said Assistance League of St. Louis president Denise McKibben. “Last year, as our volunteers visited and read with children at Head Start programs and other early childhood settings, we distributed more than 18,000 books through ‘Books from Friends’ to encourage a love of reading.”

So, I become more purposeful, sitting outside in the evenings, watching and breathing in the fact that I can see peeks of the trains passing by now that the trees aren’t as full, and hear sounds that are more vibrant in the earlier night falls. The less humid evenings hold the promise of easier walks and more adventures. Colors are more vibrant, sounds more noticeable, breathing just a little easier.

John and I started taking early September vacations years ago, once the kids were grown and time was less restrictive. Beach rentals are less expensive, pools and beaches are less crowded, and the memories we make while driving seem richer somehow. The cotton is popping, the cornstalks are dry and rustling as we pass, perfect reminders that the year is coming to a close. The night sky is a deeper indigo, the air has a lighter, less oppressive feel as we drive with the windows down on highways that are less crowded than they were a month before.

And when we return, the grocery stores will have changed from the

www.mycnews.com • Community News – St. Louis County • September 6, 2023
3
Around Town
Submitted photo

Hazelwood

Saturday, September 9 | 3 - 9 p.m.

Day

Howdershell Park at 6810 Howdershell Road in Hazelwood, next to the Fire Station

the event,” Reynolds said.

In addition to festivities and food, city services will be highlighted. Different city departments will be represented to engage with an inform the public.

Large trucks and equipment from the maintenance division will be available to climb on and in. The Police Department’s Mobile Command Center

will be onsite as well as several police vehicles. The parks and recreation division will have a tent featuring a “Spin and Win” activity for small prizes. The fire department will have a vehicle display at the firehouse adjacent to Howdershell Park. The city’s Green Committee will be offering recycling information and ways to help keep the city clean.

Hazelwood Day is geared to be a fun time with lots of opportunities to play, engage with community and learn about the city.

Hazelwood Day will take place Sept. 9 at Howdershell Park at 6810 Howdershell Road from 3 – 9 p.m. For more information, visit: www.hazelwoodmo. org/348/Hazelwood-Day.

Brought

to You BY t hese Communit Y- m inded Businesses

Come on out to this Y ear’s event!

Join us again this year for Hazelwood Day on Saturday, September 9th from 3:00 to 9:00 p.m. at Howdershell Park! Our Parks and Recreation Department has once again created an exciting event for all family members. This festival offers games, music, food trucks and an opportunity to see and experience equipment from our Police, Fire and Public Works Department.

Inflatables

ACTIVITIES

• The Hazelnuts will once again host the Bingo session. It is free to play and prizes will be awarded to winners of each game. The games run from 3:30 to 5:00 p.m.

• The annual Horseshoe Tournament begins at 2:00 p.m. with registration starting at 1:00. It is a random draw partnering event and is free to anyone wanting to play.

• Test your endurance and skill on our Inflatable Obstacle Courses from 3:00 -7:00 p.m.

• New this year is a Car Show for all automobile enthusiasts.

FOR THE KIDS

• The Hazelwood Community Enrichment Commission is once again hosting their Story Time and Craft event. Members will read a book to children and then make a craft related to the story.

• Kids of all ages will enjoy free face painting and a balloon artist

• Run through our Bubble Bus from 5:00-6:00 pm and then enjoy our glow-in-the-dark Tekno Bubbles starting at 7:45 pm.

FOOD

Treat yourself to a variety of special delicacies from our array of food trucks. Scheduled trucks are: Duchess Rose Street Food, CinnaCrush Grill, Street Sweets, Dynamic Dishes, The Crooked Boot and Juantaco.

GIVEAWAYS

The Parks and Recreation Department will provide a large assortment of prizes through its “Spin and Win”

September 6, 2023 • Community News – St. Louis County • www.mycnews.com 4
‘HAZELWOOD’ from cover Horseshoe Tournament
5 www.mycnews.com • Community News – St. Louis County • September 6, 2023 We can’t wait to see you! 1 p.m. 2 p.m. 3 – 7 p.m. 3:30 – 5 p.m. 3:30 – 5:30 p.m. 5:30 - 6:30 p.m. 5 - 6 p.m. 7:45- 8:45 p.m 3 – 9 p.m. 3 – 9 p.m. 3 – 5 p.m. 6 – 9 p.m. Horseshoe Tournament Sign Up Begins Horseshoe Tournament Starts Inflatables Obstacle Course Free Bingo Story Time & Crafts Story Time & Crafts Bubble Bus Tekno Glow in the Dark Bubbles Food Trucks City Information CHAZ45 BAND The Fabulous Motown Review Brought to you By t hese c ommunity- m inded Businesses ACTIVITIES & ATTRACTIONS: Activities & Entertainment are FREE to enjoy! ENTERTAINMENT SCHEDULE CHAZ45 BAND The Fabulous Motown Review Blue Sky Nutrition 8 Grandview Plaza Florissant, MO 63033 314-837-7290 Hazelwood NEA 493 Rue St. Francois St., Suite 3 Florissant, MO 63031 314-484-0501 www.hnea.org Story Time Food Trucks

EVENTS

Sept. 22-23: Table and tailgate sale

At Blessed Savior Lutheran Church at 2615 Shackelford Road in Florissant an indoor table sale and outdoor tailgate sale runs from 8 a.m. to 1 p.m. both days. Suggested donation is $15 per table for table sale and $5 per parking lot space for tailgate sale (you will have to provide your own tables). In case of rain, event will be rescheduled to Sept. 29-30.) Call the church at 314-831-1300 for more details and to sign-up.

RECURRING EVENTS

Weekdays: Volunteer drivers needed St. Louis County Older Resident Programs (CORP) is seeking dependable volunteers who reside in St. Louis

County, to provide transportation to and from doctor’s appointments and other essential destinations for senior residents. Mileage reimbursement is available. To learn more about volunteering contact, Laura Conners at 314-615-4435 or lconners@ stlouiscountymo.gov.

Weekdays: Food pantry volunteers needed

The Harvey Kornblum Jewish Food Pantry is in need of ongoing adult volunteers to sort food, stock shelves and shop with clients. Two-to-four hour shifts are available, Monday-Friday 8:45 a.m.-3:45 p.m. To learn more or to join this fun group, contact Chelsey Banaskavich at 314-513-1674 or cbanaskavich@jfcs-stl.org.

Mondays: City council meetings

City of Pine Lawn holds regular city council meetings at

city hall at 6250 Steve Marre Ave. in Pine Lawn on the second Monday of the month at 6:30 p.m. The meetings are open to the public.

Mondays: Choral Arts Group meetings

Choral Arts Group practices every Monday from 7 to 9 p.m. at Connection Christian Church at 1332 Feise Rd. in O’Fallon. Auditions not required. Ages high school and older are invited to join. There will be spring and fall public concerts. For more information call Marty at 636-5799227, or email concertartsa@ gmail.com.

Mondays: Workshop meetings

City of Pine Lawn holds regular workshop meetings at city hall at 6250 Steve Marre Ave. in Pine Lawn on the fourth Monday of the month at 6:30 p.m. The meetings are open to

the public.

Mondays: A cappella singers

All men who like to sing are invited to come sing with us, The Men of Harmony. We practice every Monday night at 7 p.m. at 5500 Parker Raoad which is the first house on Uthe Lane. We sing four-part harmony a capella (without accompaniment). We sing some traditional songs, as well as show tunes and more contemporary music. We do perform for the public at various functions. Persons interested can come right on in or for more information call Al at 314-993-6134.

Mondays-Thursdays: Volunteers needed Community Action Agency of St. Louis County is in need of volunteers to stock shelves, sort food shipments and pack bags for Food Pantry Clients Monday through Thursday from 8 a.m. until 3 p.m. Two to four hour shifts are available. If you are interested, please contact Cheryl Piece at 314446-4440 or cpiece@caastlc. org for additional information.

Tuesdays: Bingo

Florissant Elks Bingo takes place at 16400 New Halls Ferry every Tuesday. Doors open at 4 p.m., bingo starts at 6 p.m. No outside food or drinks allowed per St. Louis County. Food and drinks available for purchase. Maximum 150 players. Must wear mask to enter. Social distancing followed.

Send your event to editor@mycnews.com and we'll print it! September 6, 2023 • Community News – St. Louis County • www.mycnews.com 6
What’s Happening
CROSSWORD answers from page F-4 SUDOKU answers from page F-1

RECIPE : Satisfy your sweet tooth with this quick and easy dessert

CARAMELIZED BANANAS

Satisfying your craving for dessert just got a lot easier. These Caramelized Bananas are a delicious combination of crunchy caramel on the outside and soft bananas on the inside. Just a few ingredients perfectly paired with vanilla ice cream or whipped cream equals a flavorful treat.

INGREDIENTS:

Butter, for melting in pan

2 bananas

1/2 teaspoon cinnamon

2 tablespoons maple syrup

vanilla ice cream (optional)

DIRECTIONS:

In medium skillet over medium heat, melt butter. Slice bananas evenly into 1/2-inch-thick coins. Once skillet is hot, add banana slices.

Sprinkle in cinnamon, pour in maple syrup and toss gently to coat both sides. Cook bananas 4 minutes on

Find

each side until caramelized. Remove from heat and serve with vanilla ice cream, if desired.

Tips: Be sure bananas are not overly ripe. Green tinge is preferred as bananas will hold up better to heat. Sugar burns quickly watch closely when caramelizing.

Movie:

Born and raised in South St. Louis, Steve Bryan is now based in Anaheim, California, and has been allowed access to movie and television sets to see actors and directors at work. Though his writing has taken him far from St. Louis, Steve is, at heart, still the same wide-eyed kid who spent countless hours watching classic movies at neighborhood theaters.

starred as Dr. Henry Walton “Indiana” Jones, Jr., a college professor of archaeology. The story, which was set in 1936, showed Jones travelling the world in search of the Ark of the Covenant, a relic that reportedly could make an army invincible.

Dr. Jones wanted to contact Abner Ravenwood, his former mentor, but Abner’s daughter Marion told him that her father had passed away. Indy and Marion then traveled to various countries and learned for themselves the power contained within the Ark of the Covenant. 1984’s “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” explored one of Indy’s earlier adventures while 1989’s “Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade” gave audiences a satisfying end to the original trilogy.

As was the case with “Indiana Jones, other popular movie franchises explored their characters in films. 1978’s “Superman,” for instance, looked at the superhero’s early life on the planet Krypton. Marlon Brando was cast as Jor-El, a scientist who sent his son

Kal-El into space before Krypton exploded. After landing on Earth, Kal was adopted by human parents who named him Clark. On Earth, he gained superhuman abilities and learned more about his Kryptonian origins.

“Superman II” showed Clark giving up his powers for love just as General Zod and his colleagues Ursa and Non landed on Earth.

“Superman III” introduced Richard Pryor as computer programmer Gus Gorman. Released in 1987, “Superman IV” focused on removing the threat of nuclear annihilation.

In the late 1960’s, Gene Roddenberry created a television series that became a phenomenon. A decade before “Star Wars” arrived in theaters, William Shatner and Leonard Nimoy were cast in “Star Trek,” an outer space series. Although the original series ran for just three years, its fan base has been incredibly strong and devoted. In

1973, a cartoon version of the series ran on Saturday mornings and, in 1979, fans lined up to see “Star Trek: The Motion Picture.” A few years later, “Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan” cast Ricardo Montalbán as Khan Noonien Singh, a genetically enhanced tyrant. 1984’s “Star Trek III: The Search for Spock” and 1986’s “Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home” examined more of the “Trek” universe.

When it comes to magic, though, the “Harry Potter” universe can’t be beat. Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint and Emma Watson were cast as Harry Potter, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granager, three students at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. While Harry was only an infant, an evil sorcerer named Lord Voldemort attempted to kill him, but that curse backfired. Throughout his years at Hogwarts, Harry and his friends learned more spells and discovered the consequences of dark magic. Author J.K. Rowling wrote seven “Harry Potter” novels that became the basis of eight movies. “Harry Potter and the Cursed Child,” a play written by Jack Throne, was based on an original story by Rowling.

Feature
www.mycnews.com • Community News • September 6, 2023
F-1
– SUDOKU –SEE ANSWERS ON CN & STC PG. 5
Fill in the blank squares in the grid, making sure that every row, column and 3-by-3 box includes all the digits 1 through 9.
‘Indiana Jones,’ ‘Superman,’ ‘Star Trek’ and other popular film franchises
more easy dessert inspiration at Culinary.net.
“Star Trek” photo courtesy Paramount pictures
September 6, 2023 • Community News • www.mycnews.com F-2 Feature HELP WANTED HELP WANTED – CHECK US OUT AT WWW.MYCNEWS.COM –NOVENA Say this prayer 9 times a day for 9 days, then publish. Your prayers will be answered. It has never been known to fail. PRAYER TO ST. JUDE May the Sacred Heart of Jesus be adored, glorified, loved and preserved throughout the world, now and forever. Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us. St. Jude, Worker of Miracles, Pray for us. St. Jude, Helper of the Hopeless, Pray for us. Thank you, St. Jude. L.M. COLLECTIBLES facebook.com/mycnews SINGERS WANTED “Stuff” Piling Up? Let us help advertise your sale! Call Brooke at 636-379-1775
CLASSIFIEDS Feature F-3 www.mycnews.com • Community News • September 6, 2023 Our FREE publications are AREAS OF CIRCULATION www.danneggerbrothers.com Dannegger Brothers Contracting, Inc Insured | Experienced | Local | Quality • Foundation & Basement Repairs • Waterproofing • Piering • Mudjacking • Stress Bracing • Concrete Flatwork 314-993-1833 www.DanneggerBrothers.com

Louis area). We follow their day to day lives, watching as they go about the hectic task of preparing for their one big day every year. Along the way they have adventures filled with fun, comic doings and pathos.

Moore on Life

My husband and I come from different planets and because of that, we each have our own language. It took some getting used to the wordage, but eventually we were able to understand one another and even communicate somewhat.

Me: “Oh nuts, the computer isn’t working again.”

Double talk

Him: “What do you mean? I was just on it and it worked fine.”

“Nope. That little swirly thing is on and it’s just a swirling and a swirling. I’m sure it’s out of gigaboops.”

“What do you mean by gigaboops?” he asked.

“Oh, come on. You’re a computer guy, aren’t you? You know, the stuff that makes computers run. I think we’re out. Can you add some? Fill ‘er up and while you’re at it add some energy boosters. it’s running kinda slow.”

“That’s crazy talk. One, you don’t fill up a computer like you fill up a car. Two, I just need to add faster RAM.”

“Now who’s talking crazy. What good is a ram going to do a computer. Besides, I think it’s a vegetarian.”

“Not funny,” he said as he rummaged through the cupboards. “Hey, where’d you put that whatchamacallit?”

“Huh? Are you sure you don’t mean the dealywhacker or the doojigger?”

“No, I know where those are at. I mean the whatchamacallit.”

“Well, you’re going to have to provide a little more information.”

“You know, that thing you use for stirring pancake batter,” he said as he made a stirring motion

with his arm.

“Oh, that’s what you usually refer to as the thingamabobber, remember?

It’s called a whisk. Say it slowly with me, w-h-isss-k.”

“W-h-a-tcha-ma-caa-ll-it.”

“Not funny. It’s in the top drawer next to the doohickies.”

He found it immediately then opened the fridge and let out a cry of despair. “We’re out of milk?! I need milk for my pancakes. Now what?”

“Guess you better make a quick trip to the store,” I said.

“Great. Where’d you put the keys?”

“Where they usually are. In the junk drawer next to the other gizmos.”

He headed towards the door then turned and said, “Do we need anything else?”

“Yes, bring back some gigaboops. Get two packages.”

Cindy Moore is the mother of three superlative kids, servant of two self-indulgent felines and wife to one nifty husband. Her ficticious occupation? Archeological

Humorist: someone who unearths absurdity and hilarity in strange and unusual places including public restrooms, the lint filter, and church meetings. Most recently, she excavated a find in her neighbor’s bird feeder.

The opinions expressed in this column are Cindy

CROSSWORD: HEALTH & FITNESS

ACROSS

1. Century Gothic, e.g.

5. Good times

8. Pi times radius squared

12. D'Artagnan's sword

13. Before "saw" and "conquered"

14. Honeybunch

15. *Contagious skin bump

16. Centers of activity

17. One of a duo on "Sesame Street"

18. *Estrogen and testosterone

20. Tiny piece of anything

21. *Pertaining to ear

22. Pocket watch chain

23. Bed "on the tree top"

26. Home ground

30. Yankee's foe

31. Heart-to-heart

34. First Nation nation

35. Clumsy

37. Summer mo.

38. Boris Godunov and Nicholas Romanov

39. ____ 1 jet speed

40. Last in octad

42. Intelligent humor

43. Win or go home competition

45. Actor Snipes

47. Not stood

48. Knitter's unit

50. *Eye part

52. *Vitamins' partners

55. Old-time calculators

56. Port of Yemen

57. Memorization method

59. Greek Bs

60. Bank on

61. Crazy one

62. Yamaguchi or Hamill's jump

63. *"Bad" cholesterol, acr.

64. Rudolph, e.g.

DOWN

1. Like proud marines

2. Moonfish

3. Infamous Roman Emperor

4. Between triad and pentad

5. Flora's partner

6. Umbrella-like inflorescence

7. "The Untouchables" leader

8. *Richard Simmons' workout

9. Deliver a tirade

10. Lake north of Cleveland

11. Sailor's assent

13. *Uncontrollable

movement disorder

14. Retire from military

19. Deprive by deceit

22. *"All the rage" diet, e.g.

23. Way to curl hair

24. *Pertaining to kidneys

25. Manila hemp

26. *H in HIIT

27. Type of fishing net

28. Eagle's nest

29. Easily irritated

32. Naive, alt. spelling

33. Excavated

36. *Annual exam

38. Not our

40. Young newt

41. Maid to a maid

44. Desert mirage

46. L. Carroll's and J. Heller's characters

48. Chose between competitors

49. Funereal bell sound

50. Wild goat

51. Loan attribute

52. Lime-rich soil

53. Dirty money

54. Greek portico

55. Legal grp.

58. *Heart test acronym

September 6, 2023 • Community News • www.mycnews.com F-4 Feature
‘Yeggs’ is a comic series about Robert and Bill, two rabbits who have opened their own egg franchise in the Midwest (St.
SEE ANSWERS ON STC PG. 5
John Hanna Yeggs
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