This way your response is a neutral one that is elaborate and boring and the message you are sending to your aggressor is: “I understand that you want my attention and your plan is that I spend the next 15 minutes giving you some stupid argument. What I will do is give you the attention but what I tell you will be completely boring. I refuse to say anything which you can use to make fun of me.” You do not need to spend your time or energy in arguing with someone whose only objective is to bother you.
REFLECT j The first step in defending yourself is being aware of your physical and political environment. j Make yourself a difficult target by coming across as secure and aware, even when you don’t actually feel that way. This entails looking ahead instead of looking down, standing upright instead of allowing your body to slump, and walking in a decisive manner. j Learning self-defense changes the way in which women react to violence. j Analyze and develop a critical view of violence against women and their role as passive victims.
Physical self-defense SEE Physical self-defense is a spontaneous reaction that protects our psychological and physical integrity. Causing someone harm is only valid when one is defending oneself or someone else. In defending ourselves we need to be very aware of our physical strengths and weaknesses, as well as the way in which we choose to apply them, for instance by walking with complete confidence or through direct physical self-defense. What is most important is that each of us should be able to measure our strength and decide firmly to act. 61
THINK
Physical self-defense does not seek to promote violence. On the contrary, it is a resource that helps us set limits to violence. It teaches women to say “No” to the violence directed at them, in ways that cannot be ignored and which also contribute to demystifying violence as something natural that we must unquestioningly accept. 61. Extracted and translated from: • Laura Kamienski at: http://www.kicks4women.com/bt.shtml • Rentschler, Carrie, “Perpetrate My Fist! Women’s Self-Defense as Physical Education for Everyday Life” in Bad Subjects, Issue 21, October 2005 at: http://www.strategicliving.org/rentschler.html • Henri Helene, “The Bottom Line: A Very Personal Decision” at http://guardup.com/default-assault.html and “Women’s Self-Defense and Blaming the Victim at http://www.guardup.com/default-assault.html • Heyden, Marge, et al. (1999), “Fighting Back Works”, in The Journal of Physical Education, Recreation, and Dance, May/June at http://web.cecs.pdx.edu/~tellner/sd/Review.html
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