5
b connected Easy Steps to Help Your C hild S top a B ully WRITTEN BY Myriam valdez
What would you do if your child was a victim of bullying? Bulleying is no new childhood challenge, the advent of social media has made it even easier for bullies to torment their peers. Cyberbullying that takes place over electronic media has seen a dramatic rise over the years and along with bullying that goes on in schools, parents have a tremendous task to ensure their child isn’t a victim. How can you get your child to open up about bullying? Certified Bakersfield-based parenting coach Gerry Garcia encourages parents to remain engaged with their children and offers these five steps to help stop a bully in your child’s life. 1. Start investigating: Your child may change in behavior from day to night, which may just be hormonal teenage mood swings. If you notice a drop in grades or an increase in violent behaviors toward others, this may be a sign that your child could be dealing with bullying outside of your home. Be on alert for changes in behavior that seem to come out of nowhere. the Problem: Garcia cautions parents to be careful by identifying the bullying with open-ended questions like, “Can you tell me more about how they hurt you?” By allowing an open space for your child to share feelings, the mistreatment and issue can be clearly identified.
2. Pinpoint
Sit down with them and help work through the effect that bullying has on themselves and their loved ones. “It’s key to break the intimidation cycle. The child is fearful of the bully and is often controlled by that fear,” said Garcia.
3. Help
your child take control:
for Your Child: Your role as a parent or guardian is to advocate for your child. Set up a meeting with a counselor, teacher or maybe request to meet with the bully’s parents to address the problem; helping give your child confidence to stand up for themself.
4. Stand Up
5. Give Your Child
the
Tools
to
Defend Themself:
Teaching kids an alternative response to bullies will help any child see that they are capable of defending themselves. Garcia suggests, parents should role play with their child on scenarios such as “Let me show you how to walk away from those kids when they bully you,” or “I can show you how to be humorous when they begin to pick on you.”
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Garcia offers her Parenting Coaching classes at St. Francis Church and new classes start this fall. Classes are open to anyone. For more information, visit assertiveparenting.com/blog. October 2012
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bakersfield-wellness.com
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