Second Supper, Issue 120

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FREE VOL. 8 ISSUE 120 June 19, 2008


305 Pearl St. Downtown La Crosse Publisher: Mike Keith

mike.keith@secondsupper.com

Editorial Staff Editor-in-Chief: Adam Bissen

adam.bissen@secondsupper.com

Managing Editor/Art Director: Joel Kuennen joel.kuennen@secondsupper.com

Copy Editor: Briana Rupel

Mini-golf - page 5 Frolf! - page 6 Ball Golf - pages 11-13

copyeditor@secondsupper.com

Student Editor: Ben Clark

benjamin.clark@secondsupper.com

Photo Editor: Kelly Morrison

kelly.morrison@secondsupper.com

Contributers:

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8, issue 119

Interested in being a home owner?

LA CROSSE Tim Bavlnka Adam Bissen Scott Brown Nicholas Cabreza Benjamin Clark Andrew Colston Brett Emerson Emily Faeth Erich Boldt

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Do this... WHAT: Norskedalen Midsummer Festival WHERE: Norskedalen, La Crosse County Highway PI, just 3 miles north of Coon Valley, Wisconsin. WHEN: June 20 - 22, 10 a.m. to 4 p.m.

The Midsumer Festival is the second most important holiday in Norway, after New Years Eve, and it marks the happy day in which we return to a full day's worth of light. In order to celebrate this occasion, the Norkeldalen Nature and Heritage Center will be putting on two full days of events! These events include a bonfire on Friday night to signify the start of the festival. On the following Saturday, there will be a pancake breakfast from 8 a.m. to 10 a.m. and will cost $3 for kids under 10 and $5 for adults, and will include a wide array of fine Norwegian cuisine, including everyone's favorite, lefse! Other events include a woodcarving demonstration and competition, baking demonstrations, and traditional Norwegian craft-works to be on display with plenty of demonstrations. For the kids, there will be face painting, nature hikes, a scavenger hunt and a visit from the trolls under the bridge! Live music will be provided by the Norskedalen Trio, Brian Rude, the Sons of Norway Wergeland Dancers and many more! Admission costs $5 for adults, $2 for kids or $12 for families. So come on out and enjoy a fun day of Norwegian action under the fullest day of sun this summer has to offer!

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June 12, 2008


Social Networking

the top

Second Supper’s finally on the social networking bandwagon, with a whole chain of townies to answer our deliciously revealing questions. Each week, the interviewee will name someone they're connected to, who will become the next person interviewed, and so it shall continue.You see? We really are all connected.

Top-rated golf courses in Wisconsin

NAME & AGE: Richie Hanley, 37

1. Whistling Straits, Straits Course (Sheboygan) 2. Blackwolf Run, River Course (Kohler) 3. The Bull (Sheboygan Falls) 4. Whistling Straits, Irish Course (Sheboygan) 5. Blackwolf Run, Meadow Valleys (Kohler) 6. The Bog (Saukville) 7. Sentryworld Sports Center (Stevens Point)

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3 CDs YOU’D TAKE ON A ROAD TRIP: Anything from Studebaker 7, The Remainders and The Dweebs IF YOU COULD PLAY ANY INSTRUMENT PERFECTLY, WHAT WOULD IT BE? Drums WHAT’S IN YOUR POCKETS? Money and Powerball tickets HOW DO YOU KNOW KATIE? She works at Bodega and she's a good friend.

slang terms Knee knocker Bag rat Cabbage Dance floor Grow teeth Albatross Weekend warrior

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Second Supper vol. 8, issue 119

Golf 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7.

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Mini-Golf Reviews Riverside Amusements 1304 Interchange Place, La Crosse I remember this place when it had a bounce house and an arcade. So it's sad to see this place in its present state: as a life support system for a go-kart track, batting cages and the mini-golf course in question. A half-in-the-bag Benjamin Clark and a fully sober me took to the links with a gusto that soon cooled.Though the course was still the scenic trick shot affair that I remembered, it had clearly seen better days. The holes, once all bright and green and inviting, now alternated between dead green, pool tarp blue and concrete gray — a color which provoked my blearyeyed friend to wonder why I was about to putt on the walkway. All up and down the mini-golf mountain we shambled, noticing dimples smashed into the fraying courses. It made for a somewhat depressing adventure. As a rule, nobody really plays the 18th hole, and we didn't either, instead trying to lob our balls into the faraway hole in search of a free game and a Whopper. It's almost a good thing that we failed; I'm not sure that we could have handled such desolation again. Riverside Amusements is sadly a ghost town of its former self, which sucks, because it used to be awesome. Nonetheless, the trip was worth it, if for no other reason than seeing a 6-year-old girl go into the medium pitch softball cage, completely out of her element, and take her swings like a champ. Now that's hardcore. — Brett Emerson

Walsh Golf Center 4203 Highway B, La Crosse This is what mini-golf ought to be. Though Walsh's is a completely flat course and doesn't offer as much obvious challenge as Riverside's hills, angles and water hazards, what this place has going for it is class. Though I haven't been to this place since I was a kid, it's exactly as I remember. To progress to the end, a player must angle their shots off gravestones, under windmills and into clown faces, just as the mini-golf gods have ordained since time immemorial (or at least the 1950s). Many of the obstacles are automated, providing an extra degree of difficulty and fun. While this attraction certainly

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takes a backseat to Walsh's driving range, the course is well maintained and well worth the price of admission. These days, if you can even find a mini-golf course, odds are that it's part of a larger entertainment complex. Usually, these new courses are competitive games of geometry, occasionally blacklighted in the spirit of Cosmic Bowling, trying way too hard to be cool. Though they can offer a good time, they will never adequately replace the old school thrills of putting into a clown's mouth. Find your happy place here. — Brett Emerson

Twin Creeks Golf 248 Twin Creeks Drive, Hokah, Minn. After a little vodka and some SoCo to calm our nerves, me, my trusty roomie Don and our newly turned 21 friend John made the adventure to Hokah to try out the Twin Creeks Golf mini-golf course, recently re-opened after suffering flood damage. We were greeted by the owner, a friendly old man who thanked us for stopping by and immediately offered us a free bottle of water for our game. We obliged and stepped out into the sun to see what the course would offer us for a challenge, and ultimately, mini-golf glory. The course is set around a beautiful fountain in the center in which a sea beast rises out of the water and spurts water into the heavens. Impressed, we started our round. The course itself is in much better condition that the course at Riverside Amusements, and each individual hole presents a nice challenge to each player. The greens were disguisedly fast, and one had to be careful to hit with just enough force to ensure a great shot. If it were not for the slightly out-of-the way drive to Hokah, I would recommend this course to any mini-golf enthusiast. As our round finished up, John and I tied for first with a final score of 51, and Don, who had encountered some difficulty during the first nine, finished with a respectable 55. If you're looking for something to do on a nice day, I recommend taking the scenic drive to Hokah and playing a round with friends. Nothing but good times! — Benjamin Clark

June 12, 2008


Frolf! JR:You’ve got your putters, mid-range and drivers. RH: It’s just like golf. You’ve got different ones that go farther and shorter, and you’ve got some that go right, some that go left, some that are made for tomahawks, some that are rollers. Every one does something different, usually. SS: But say someone is just trying to get started in the game. What do you need to start? RH: Putter and midrange and driver. You can start with three. I’ve seen that you can get a buzz and play the whole round with one disc. SS: So where can a person play golf in the area? RH: We’ve got here [Pettibone Park]. We have Justin Trails [near Sparta].

By Adam Bissen

adam.bissen@secondsupper.com Tees and Titleists have gotten the most attention, but not all golf is played on the links. Disc golf is an increasingly popular, and dramatically cheaper, alternative. At almost all times the sun shines, players can be found throwing Frisbees at the 18 pins at Pettibone Park, but the most competitive golfers gather Monday nights at 6 p.m. for “league play." This Monday, Second Supper sat down with two “frolfers,” Rustin Hauser of Onalaska and Jake Roesler from La Crosse, to learn why they chuck ‘bees at baskets. Second Supper: How long have you been playing disc golf? Rustin Hauser: About four years. Jake Roesler:Yeah, four or five. SS: How’d you get into the game? RH: My cousin Chad plays and said “Man, you’ve got the build for it.You should play.”

RH: How far have we gone? Milwaukee? JR: Probably way up north. I went up to Cable, Wis. That’s way up north in Wisconsin. RH: But you can go as far as, like, Japan. JR: I’ve played in Vegas, though, too.When I went out to Vegas I played. It was a good time. RH: My family — my in-laws now — are from Florida, so I’ve played down there when I go visiting. SS: Are any tournaments a higher echelon, like professional caliber? RH: There was the Minnesota Majestic, which I just got done doing.

JR: I just started out from my brother Jarrod Roesler. He just had a couple discs and I went out and threw ‘em one day and I just became addicted instantly. It’s a great sport. I love it.

JR: We have St. Mary’s [University] in Winona, Minn.

JR:Yep.We call them A-tiers, B-tiers and C-tiers, and A-tiers are where the top players come. Barry Schultz — he’s a pro — I think he took home $2,500 in that tournament.

RH:You name the place.

SS: He’s an actual pro?

SS: How often do you get out to play?

JR:The Midwest is pretty popular with disc golf. There’s a lot of courses. It’s growing. It’s expanding. The sport’s huge.

JR: Yep, it’s called the PDGA [Professional Disc Golf Association].

JR: Everyday we’re out. [To Hauser] Well, he’s got a family and stuff. RH: Nah, I work a lot more. I’m out here maybe once or twice a week.

SS:What are the players like that are at the top SS: How far have you ever traveled to play a course?

see FROLF! page 10

SS: What’s the appeal of disc golf? RH: It’s just addicting. You’re out here exercising and just bombing a disc. JR: — With your friends. You’re just out enjoying the weather. It’s a great time. SS: What do you think about ball-and-club golf? RH: I used to play all the time, but not anymore. It’s not for me. JR: This sport [disc golf] is free, you know? RH: It’s out here for everybody. You got a course that doesn’t cost you to play. You ain’t going to spend 50, 60 dollars to go play a round. You just get out there and play. JR: But we do have respect for the ball golfers — we call them ball golfers if we’re disc golfers — but, yeah, like Tiger Woods, he’s unbelievable, and the way ball golfers think are the same way disc golfers think.You have to be thinking about the wind. You’ve gotta be thinking about elevation and trees. You gotta approach your shots. It’s kind of the same game that we play.

Drink of the Week

SS: I see you guys are pretty stacked with discs. How many do you usually take out on the course? RH: Fifteen, probably. JR: I’m stacked with 25. SS: Why does a golfer need so many?

Second Supper vol. 8, issue 119

HAPPY HOUR Monday - Friday, 4-7

114 Fifth Ave. Downtown La Crosse (608) 782-3566 6


Excalibur!

By Brett Emerson

brett.emerson@secondsupper.com There are advantages to having one’s best friend live next to a golf course.Years and years ago, my gang of tomfoolery hooligans would storm the green pastures of the course next door under the cover of night, in search of suburban adventure. Unlike some of our late teenaged capers — riding cars through automated car washes, excessive fun with fireworks and of course lawn gnome rampage — there wasn’t a lot of mischief in our golf course ramblings, discounting trespassing laws broken with impunity. Most nights, we would play hide and seek on a massive scale, and that was about it. And there was an ass wedding. But beyond these things, only one other routine stands out. It didn’t take a large degree of imagination or boredom for us to convince ourselves that it would be a good idea to pillage the water hazards of their golf balls. It was a win-win situation; we’d get a nice dip in the pond and come out with bags full of hard ping-pong balls to use as we saw fit. After all, it wasn't as though anybody was using them. How could a group of restless ne’er-do-wells resist such a proposition? The first time, there were only three of us, me and my two best friends, staring down a gold-lighted fountain, and heedlessly jumping

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into its waters. “If anybody finds a golf club,” I declared, as we bobbed on the surface,“he’s the king.” So it began, and the three of us probed the bottom with our feet, finding our quarries, diving down, and throwing them to the hazard’s edge. Within minutes, the shore was covered with balls in various states of decay. My foot brushed against something that wasn’t a golf ball, and I knew what it was immediately. And like the fulfillment of Arthurian legend, I grasped it between my toes, and pulled a beautiful sand wedge from the depths, raising it to the starry sky, triumphant. I should have bellowed “By the power of Grayskull!” and ran off to wail on Skeletor and the other forces of evil. But instead, I cackled like an idiot, “Ha, ha, you fuckers! I’m the king!” We named the sand wedge Excalibur — it seemed appropriate. After we gathered up our pirate treasure in grocery store bags and scampered away, we used my mighty weapon to knock a few balls into the woods below Granddad Bluff. We shot like hell, but it was all we could have hoped for in a night. In the months to come, more jerks would come along with us, and golf ball diving became something of an institution for a while. Our Titleist horde greatly increased in number and piled up in my friend’s garage, though ultimately, we rarely used them. I’m pretty sure that when my friend moved away from that adjoining house, he simply threw most of them away. One doesn’t dive for golf balls out of any sense of purpose, unless we’re talking about a 10-year-old golf groupie or a ball scalper. The kids were merely bored, and it was fun. Now we drink, in prone, stationary positions, and our senses of adventure are lost. Excalibur lasted for a few years, until my two co-conspirators snapped it in half while wrestling with each other. I should have returned it to the water hazard and enacted some Once and Future King decorum, but instead I threw it in the trash. In the time between its discovery and its demise, however, the sand wedge was indispensible. It served as both fidget stick and pimp cane, and steered clear of being used for some Jack Nicholson road rage. I took the thing everywhere, often without being aware of it. And the forces of evil knew not to mess with me and my sand wedge of ultimate power. And all was well. It was way more fun to be a teenager than it is to be a grown-up.

June 12, 2008


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Second Supper vol. 8, issue 119

By Ben Clark

benjamin.clark@secondsupper.com Ah, golf. Slowly becoming America’s new favorite pastime thanks to heavy hitters like Tiger Woods and Greg “The Shark” Norman, many travel to those fabulously laid out emerald landscapes to take out the frustrations of life, work and family on tiny, dimpled white balls. No game entices so many people and leaves them just as frustrated as when they first get to the green. But fear not, kiddies! With a little understanding of the physics involved in your average golf game, you just might be able to brag to your buddies at the 19th hole about your amazing day at the links. Let’s begin by looking at the target of our pent-up rage: the golf ball. The golf ball is specially designed with tons of tiny little dimples (usually between 300 and 450, depending on the brand) used to give the ball more lift in the air and travel further through the air, as the dimples reduce the amount of resistance the ball will face as it flies through the air and into the bunker. Thanks to the lack of resistance that the ball faces, the pressure above the ball is significantly lower than the pressure below it. This difference in pressure allows the ball to stay in the air longer and further, as it also prevents the ball from falling out backwards in the air. This particular phenomenon is called the Magnus effect, which was first observed by Sir Issac Newton back in 1673 while observing tennis players at Cambridge. In most basic terms, the Magnus effect describes the physical phenomenon when a spinning object creates a swirl of air surrounding it as it continues to spin. Now, to get to the meat and potatoes of the piece: how to make your ball travel as far as possible. Well, that is all determined by how the ball is struck by a particular club. If you ever watch a golf swing in slow motion with the camera focused on the ball, you can see the ball slowly move towards the club face upon impact. This movement backwards from the tee gives the ball an anti-clockwise spin throughout the air.The spin rates of the ball are determined by the alignment of the club when hitting the ball, the angle of the club face and the amount of force that goes into the ball.The higher the spin rate of the ball, the more we get

to see the Magnus effect help us out on drives for those pesky par fives. As the spin rate of the ball increases, the Magnus effect causes the ball to lift up higher into the air upon the drive, which increases the total distance traveled by the ball. If you’re using a 1 wood (angle face of 10 degrees) and hit the ball with a velocity of 134 miles per hour, you’re looking at a spin rate of about 3,600 RPMs. Since you’re using a driver, which typically has a much higher amount of mass, you’re looking at a larger amount of force going into the ball, which will send it flying further than if you use a 9 iron (angle face of 45 degrees), which is usually hit with an average velocity of 90 miles per hour. This will give you a whopping spin rate of 10,800 RPM, which is going to send that ball into a nice high arc with just enough force to land you onto the green to make that putt for eagle. Keep in mind that these spin rates can play against you in a game. If you top the ball, you actually make the ball spin in a clockwise rotation, which in turn causes the ball to act the opposite as a nice, solid drive on the tee. This action causes the ball to head downwards, and needless to say, your drive will not be the envy of your golf party. The same goes for the notorious “hook” and “slice.” If you slice the ball, then you’ve hit the ball with the club face coming in at the ball from an “out to in” direction, which causes the ball to spin from left to right. The ball will then curve to the right, resulting in your ball hitting a member from the family game playing on the hole next to you. Bastard. The exact opposite is true for the hook. The ball is hit from the club face going “in to out” from a side angle. The result is the ball spinning right to left, and the subsequent curving of the ball to the left. I hope the next time you’re playing a game with your friends, kiddies, that you think a little bit about all of the physics involved in the grand game of golf. Whether you want to impress your friends with your knowledge of the Magnus effect, or how your 9 iron is going to exactly whack the hell out of your ball, who thought science and sports could never mix together? Here’s hoping you have an awesome next game with a little help from your ol’ friend, physics. Fore!

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Oh Tiger!

By Maria Pint

maria.pint@secondsupper.com How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. I love thee to the tee box and the fairway and the green. I would go on changing the words to that poem but I just Googled it and I can’t even understand it, so let me just tell you how it is in my own words: I love golf. There is no other word than “love” to describe what I feel when I have a forged steel wedge in my hand, or a 460 cc driver at the ready. The game is my life, my life is the game. It’s sort of sad to put it that way, but golf is more than a simple hobby to me. I live on a golf course, I work at a golf course, and since I have slow foot speed and a lack of coordination, it’s really my only sport. There is no better place for me to work than at the golf course either; I sit there all day long talking about golf with my bosses who are in fact, golf professionals. It’s awesome. The best part about working at the particular golf course I work at is that I have seniority; which is really one of those great things in the workplace not solely reserved for the golf industry, but I happen to have it so let’s just roll with it. The only person in the pro shop that has worked at the course longer than me is the owner; both golf pros have only been working there for a few years and I’m on my sixth season. So needless to say, I just nod when they tell me to do something and do it whenever I feel ready and in the way in which I feel like doing it; I think they’re even terrified to yell at me. On days like today, when I went into work at noon, I didn’t feel too bad just sitting around all day. Normally, I try to at least make it look like I’m being somewhat productive but not today. It was the day after the 108th U.S. Open at Torrey Pines and all was well in the pro shop for one reason: play-off between that punk, Rocco Mediate, and Tiger Tiger Woods y'all! Golf fans everywhere had one more day to relish in the glory of the U.S. Open instead of returning to normal, everyday life. Like I said, I usually at least try to look

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busy when one or more of my bosses are around, especially if the owner is lurking about, but today, with the extreme excitement of a playoff sparking through the entire clubhouse, I was kicking back and enjoying the full six hours of coverage. And I wasn’t the only one; both of my bosses and the owner and I were just chillin’ in the pro shop watching the beauty of 18 holes of tournament play unfold before our eyes. On big putts, we would salivate over the T.V. and virtually ignore all customers and phones ringing. It was a great day in the world of golf because of one reason:Tiger Woods. He is what I would consider to be a walking orgasm for all golfers. I don’t care if they are gay or straight, male or female; when Tiger Woods takes a massive swing with his Nike SQ driver, any fan of golf should skeet in their pants just a little bit. He’s just so gorgeous; I’m not talking about how he’s hot because he is, but I’m talking about how beautiful he plays the game. Impossible sand shots made to look easy, 200 yard approaches that he sticks to within three feet: just another day in the life for Tiger Woods. It was almost comical to see him face Rocco Mediate for the 2008 U.S. Open title. Tiger had a 10-1 record of playoff wins going into it and Rocco hadn’t won a tournament (not just majors either) in six years; Tiger now has an 11-1 record and Rocco still hasn’t won. And I know how everyone likes to cheer for the underdog, but Rocco was too much of a hack to even hold a candle to Orgasmic Tiger. Oddly enough, Rocco stayed with Tiger through the entire round; he was even leading by one stroke as they started their last hole. But what happened? Rocco buckled and Tiger almost dropped his eagle putt; instead, he just tapped in for birdie and forced Rocco to a sudden death play-off. Buh-bye Rocco! They headed to the seventh hole where Tiger put his drive in the fairway and Rocco pushed his into a bunker (translation for all of you non-golfers: a sand trap). Tiger Tiger Woods y'all! I knew from that point on that Tiger would win it. I personally had a feeling all along that he would anyway, but Rocco’s choke on the seventh tee just sealed the deal. In all actuality I feel sort of bad for poor old Rocco, because he had so much fun out there playing against Tiger. Personally, I would have been shitting my pants at the very idea of sharing a tee box with golf’s greatest player (currently I suppose you could say), but Rocco did pretty well. He lost in the end, but he gave us just one more day of wonderful golf to watch. And as for Tiger Woods; a 14th major to be added to his list of accomplishments and another competitor bites the dust. He’ll go home and screw his hot blonde wife and then get up in the morning and piss excellence. In the meantime, the golf world is busy yelling, “Oh yeah, Tiger! Come on baby, give it to me harder! I’m almost there!”

June 12, 2008


Friday the 13th hip-hop show

FROLF! from page 6 of the game?

there, you can’t miss it.

JR: Unbelievable.

RH: That’s a great course. Great course, big elevations, up and down the hills.

RH: Yeah, they’re shooting a lot better than me. JR: Their average drives are probably like 500 feet. SS: Wow. JR:Yeah, they’re pretty solid. SS: So do you keep like a handicap when you go out to play? RH: No, everything is just a par 3. No matter what it is we play everything’s three and that’s it. SS: What’s it feel like to ace a hole?

By Blake Auler-Murphy blake.auler-murphy@secondsupper.com

While Bandit County Fair campers were enjoying their night under the stars, La Crosse saw the roof ripped off the Jay Street Joint! Friday the 13th brought hip-hop back to weekends in downtown La Crosse. The night saw performances from Wu-Tang Wednesdays regulars Natetronimous Prime, Efftupp and Hives Inquiry Squad. They were joined by guests Blinded and Six-Nine of We One, Us, Random Thoughts and Tyde of Verbal Kint and headliners Northern Lightz. The DJ for the evening was Big Ben who played an interesting variety of tracks, all of which were bassy and kept the place moving. The night flew by, as those of you who were there will remember, but here are a few highlights. The night was still warm from the day as people started filing in to order drinks and relax into the bar.The remixes and DJ techniques started to make people move. Natetronimous Prime and JD started the night off with a roaring set rapping about living in the I-90 corridor and what it is like for them. Natetronimous stands out for his witty lines and commanding stage presence. JD is low and rough with a tough swagger. Together in their hit "Off a Few Bars" they show that they are a tight crew not to be messed with. Then Efftup and Us took the stage. Us joined Efftupp to play on Friday the 13th as the Smiley Face Gang, and the group played a lively set. The combination of Efftupp's catchy and smart, yet crass, lyricism met well with Hyphon and Def Mech, the MCs of Us. In fact, beyond Efftupp's performance of G-Theory-produced “Lost Cause” and other hits from forthcoming Story Time with Baba Ganouche, some of the best moments of the set were when Hyphon and Efftupp performed songs together. Us played songs with vigor and intensity. The duo performed a 9-minute song and also fan favorites "Washed Away" and "Let it Rain." The way the set interwove it seems The Smiley Face Gang may be more than a one-time thing. Random Thoughts and Tyde ran circles around the building with their quick, witty and poignant lyricism. Random Thoughts was best when he freestyled or performed spoken words, and the beats seemed rather eclectic for the two. Tyde brought some strong rhymes

Second Supper vol. 8, issue 119

and the duo really held the attention of the audience as the bar swelled with people and the night went on. Look forward to shows from Verbal Kint coming up real soon. Eau Claire MCs Six-Nine of We One and Blinded kept the vibe strong. Six-Nine is a man to see if not for his unrivaled showmanship then for his sheer physical size. Six-Nine made The Joint into a rap house party and, with the help of Blinded, really made for a really feel good time. Blinded's lyrical content was aware and uplifting while at the same time almost carefree. The party really came together well under their time reigning on stage. Portland, Oregon-bound Hives Inquiry Squad took the stage next as the atmosphere in the room seemed to change. Hives has a great following in La Crosse, and the crowd focused in and people awaited what was to come. G-Theory performed the first two songs from his forthcoming Escaping Stasis EP. These songs were complex yet danceable, and Random Thoughts guest starred on the second song. Then Another Exoneration MCs Efftupp, Hyphon and Def Mech were welcomed to debut “All Else Fails,” a crew track that filled the room with energy and had people dancing to the back of the bar. Hives Inquiry Squad seemed to do a lot of mixing in their set, opting to do more songs but shorter versions. This was pulled off seamlessly and shows their vast catalog. Northern Lightz played to a packed, excited bar. This was in large part thanks to the rowdy DJ that Luke B was. He had the crowd screaming before the group had hit one note. Luke's hype is probably only superceded by his production that complimented the MCs Motz and Castaway. Motz has a real way around a microphone. Flipping styles around and delivering with huge punch and great enunciation, the crowd could get down and still caught a lot of his funnier lines. Castaway's guest appearances in the set were well-timed and he delivered all the goods. Castaway made a reputation for himself battling in the Midwest and he was not at a loss for words Friday. The event was hosted by Wu Tang Wednesday's coordinator Jeff Smader, who said of the evening, “It was huge. I was working the bar and I couldn't get a break. People were really getting down and it was great to see so many people come out and support.”

JR: They have two 18s out there. It’s just ridiculous. It’s like a resort. It’s really cool. SS:What have been some of your highest points in your disc golf career? JR: [To Hauser] Probably me and you setting course records at Pettibone for doubles. RH: Mine was getting an ace with Barry Schultz. I went to that tournament, the Minnesota Majestic, and I aced a hole with him.That was honestly, by far, one of my best right there. SS: Is this guy like a legend?

JR: I like it!

RH: Yeah. He’s the best that ever came out of Wisconsin. He plays the world tour. He’s a pretty big golfer.

RH:Yeah, it’s exciting.

SS: That’s something to shoot for.

JR: You usually can make money off aces, too. We call it a “fifty-one,” if someone hits an ace everyone usually has to pay five dollars if you’re in the group.You can make some money.There’s always betting in disc golf — I don’t know if I should be telling you that.

RH:Yeah, I’ll get there.

RH: Everyone’s paying $5 right now (for the league), and a dollar goes to the ace pool. And that’s up to 100-some dollars right now, so if you hit an ace you get that and whoever’s in your group pays you five bucks. SS: Nice. So the tournament is here every Monday — RH:Yep, and Wednesdays at St. Mary’s. JR: Sundays at Justin Trails.That’s outside Sparta, past a little town called Leon. Go right out there, go right on County J. Boom! It’s right

SS: Any last appeals to get people out on the courses? RH: I just think, you know, look at Tiny here, this guy coming in the blue hat. He’s an old gym teacher from Logan. I mean, he’s an older guy and he can shoot just as well as us youngsters out here on the back. It’s not for just young.You look over here you’ve got 11-year-olds. You’ve got Chuck over there in the red, he’s like what, 47? Any age can play it doesn’t matter. It’s out here for everybody. Exercise and get out and meet some cool people. JR: Just play the sport and you’ll realize what disc golf is about, that’s all I can say. RH: All it takes is one good shot and you’re addicted.

Photos by Kelly Morrison 10


Onalaska

Maple Grove Pine Creek

North Side

Fox Hollow

La Crosse ST

La Crescent

Forest Hills

Irish Hills

Check out pages 12-13 for reviews of each of these courses!

11

June 12, 2008


Maple Grove Maple Grove is a well-maintained course with challenging holes and fantastic weekly specials. It is located off of Highway B, just six short miles from Hwy 16, and offers cheap early bird and twilight rates. The real deal, however, if one is looking for the greatest golf bargain in town is “Monday Madness” which offers $3 golf after 3 p.m. A reservation is greatly recommended on Mondays. Maple Grove is a mature 18-hole course first built in 1929. The 3,000 yard front nine offers large tree-lined fairways, lush greens and a couple of tricky water hazards. Hole number 2 is a particularly attractive 129-yard par 3 which carries a small pond and is complimented by an oversized sloped green. Be wary of overshooting on this hole as the back slopes mercilessly down a bluffside. Hole #5 tees off of a elevated tee box overlooking miles of Wisconsin scenery and Arrowhead lake which a player must carry before setting up a second shot on a tight fairway. The back nine plays 485 yards longer and has a bit more character in its narrow fairways, hazardous doglegs, and large bunkers. Hole number 11 has an elevated tee box overlooking a long 517-yard par 5, which is followed by an uphill par 3 which challenges the errant shot with its large sloped green. All the holes on both nines flow well together in length and variety of approach shots and the course shows its age in the well maintained fairways and fast but fair greens. Visiting this course during the week on a peak time will run $17 but visit before 9 a.m. Tues.-Fri. to receive the $5/nine early bird rate. Twilight rates are $6.50/nine and start after 5:45 p.m. Tues.-Thurs. The course offers a driving range and a large practice putting green while the very large clubhouse offers everything from a swimming pool and locker rooms to a great bar that serves sandwiches and delicious drinks. Whether you’re playing 18 or practicing on the range, Maple Grove is a golf gem in Sparta’s rolling countryside. - Matt Wolf

Pine Creek Breathtaking views seem to be a theme with golf courses in this area, and Pine Creek is no slouch. Surrounded by bluffs at all sides as well as rolling farmlands, creeks and small lakes, this course is as relaxing and fun to enjoy as any. The greens are a little rough right now, but the undulations and rolling hills more than make up for the tough putting surfaces. Holes 1 and 2 offer a pretty unique experience while playing. If you listen carefully, you can hear running water from the creek and loud moos from the cows feeding north of the course. I started off well on the first two holes with a birdie and a par, but as the round went on, I returned to my normal double-bogey style of play. Hole number 4, a par five, was one of the toughest holes for me because of the downward slope just right of the fairway. However, it was my favorite hole because it gave me the the best views of the surrounding two-hundred-foot bluffs and farmlands that surround this nine-hole course. Another hole worth checking out is number 9, a great little par three that tees off on a hill, slopes down a valley, and then slopes back upward to the green. This hole is aesthetically beautiful, but the green is in bad shape and needs some well-deserved attention. It leaves a bad taste in your mouth to finish on such a rough and bare green. Pine Creek offers deals on Wednesdays for men and Thursdays for women if you can play before 4 p.m. Nine holes will treat your wallet nicely with $8 rounds. - Mike Keith

Fox Hollow Fox Hollow is a great place to play. It's close to La Crosse, and the course is in great shape. To get there, head towards Valley View Mall, take Highway B until you reach the fork and take a right into Barre Mills. We played this course last Thursday, and despite the damage and rain in Barre Mills the weekend before, the course was pretty dry overall. Fox Hollow is a newer course, created in 1994. Don't let this deter you though, because Fox Hollow is one of the premier courses in the area. There is an abundance of mature trees, from birches to willows, that add to the aesthetics of the course. The course also has an adequate amount of water, although the ponds don't interfere much with the game, except on hole 17. Number 17 is a very unique hole. It is one of only two holes in the state that has an island green. Although it's a par three, it wasn't easy; Jake and I both put our first two shots in the water. After we took our mulligans, we landed on the green and were able to putt in on a terrific green. My favorite hole on the course was number 14.You tee off from the top of a hill, shoot downward and to the left, and your left with a great approach shot to the green. However, if you go too far left, you'll be in the hundred-foot birches and long grasses that line the left side of the hole. Fox Hollow had the nicest greens of any course I played in the area, and the fairways were clean and in great shape. I would highly recommend this course to anyone who hasn't played yet this season. After you finish your round, head to their pub and grab some great burgers that will cost you only a couple of bucks. - Mike Keith

Second Supper vol. 8, issue 119

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Irish Hills Plan to hit up the Alpine Inn and Irish Hills for a great afternoon of breathtaking views and a great 9-hole golf course; the order you do it depends on your ability to drink and play golf. Irish Hills is a newer course in the area and is accessible via Highway 33 (between K-Mart and Village Quillins). It boasts the best top-of-the-bluff views you can experience and has a healthy mix of challenging and not-so-challenging holes to keep your final score in a decent range. The course is in good shape, especially compared to a couple years ago, as the overall grooming keeps getting better. The greens need some work, but the fairways are more than adequate to make up for them.The most challenging part of the course is the par 4s that angle toward the downward sloping hills; they will force you to lose balls if you slice your driver often. After playing the course a couple of times I easily came to the conclusion that number 7 is the hardest hole on the course, boasting a challenging par 5/6. Number 7 is basically a 560-yard leftward turning horseshoe. The left side skirts the edge of a hundred-foot hill that leads into the jungle-esque woods that border it. To the right, you find rolling 25-foot hills and unique undulations that make this hole especially challenging. It's wise to play it safe and drive with a 3-wood or low iron to save a penalty stroke from going left. Believe me, a penalty will leave you in the 7-8 range before you move on to hole number 8. Overall, Irish Hills is a course worth playing; often. It boasts some of the best prices in the area and has adequate amenities including a full pro shop and an attached bar; perfect! The greens are rough, the fairways are great and the views are simply spectacular. Since the course is set 400-feet above La Crosse, from multiple spots on the course you can see for miles, including a picturesque view of the Mississippi River that's nestled between lush bluffs and an array of deciduous trees. Irish Hills is close to downtown La Crosse and is well worth the money. They also offer some excellent specials, including $5 when you play from the yellows, and its always $5 after 7 p.m. - Mike Keith

Forest Hills

Forest Hills is the closest course to downtown La Crosse and will save you a good amount in gas if you live in the heart of La Crosse. The scenic beauty is incredible since nearly every hole has a view of Granddad's Bluff. Play Irish Hills at the top of the bluff, play Forest Hills at the bottom. Forest Hills is the oldest course in the county and was actually one of the first 10 golf courses in Wisconsin. It's one hundred-years-plus old age leads to some of the best up-keep in the area. As you work your way through the course, you'll notice the cleanly cut fairways that look like fairways of the courses you see on the PGA tour. Forest Hills is actually the original La Crosse Country Club, and was, for 99 years until the lease ran out and the city voted to make the course public. (The current La Crosse Country Club is in Onalaska and costs too much for my meager salary.) Forest Hills is one of only two golf courses with an active railroad track running through it, but make sure to put your club down at the driving range when the train comes roaring through the course. Although it's tempting to hit the train, it's illegal to hit the box cars, and common sense tells you "No." At least, that's what I was told. The entire front nine allows you to catch spectacular views of the famed Grandad's Bluff. It's pretty amazing to gaze up at the remnants from the Driftless Area, with its impressive stone faces and overhanging trees and grasses. My favorite hole was number 4 on the front nine. It takes you right below Grandad's Bluff and it has some mature trees that hug the fairways. Overall, the front nine was in good shape and beautiful, but the back nine takes the cake. The first six holes have you essentially playing golf in the flatlands between the surrounding bluffs of Hixon Forest — watch out for black bears though! Number 12 is especially impressive with weeping willows swaying to the right side of the fairway, and the fairways have parallel alternating dark and light green grass that will make you feel like you're on a hundred-dollar golf course. Another great hole is number 3, a par three with a spectacular view of a wooded bluff. It's the hole that runs the furthest into the bluffs, making it the last hole you see as you hike up into Hixon Forest. I'd highly recommend this course because the price is right (under $20), they offer student discounts and the staff is helpful. More importantly, the greens are CLEAN, and the fairways are in great shape. - Mike Keith

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June 12, 2008


Night at the Freakshow

Photos by Kelly Morrison By Thaddeus N. Albertoni Critic

Over 200 plebeians in Winona were subjected on Monday to the most tedious, banal and un-freakish freak show this reviewer has seen in quite some time. Presented by the Barnum-inspired 999 Eyes Freakshow, dare I say they were traveling charlatans, presenting not wonders of human oddities but a trite collection of country folk prancing to hypnotic strains of a Texas Gypsy band! Bah! — those hucksters heralded the wonders of their grotesque menagerie. From their newspaper releases to their Technicolor posters to their newfangled “Interweb” panoramas, the 999 Eyes declaimed a most titillating of freak shows. We heard of a Gentle Giant, the illusionist Black Scorpion, a Worm Eater, a Tiger Lady, an Eyelid Extractor and a Giant Handed Man, but when we arrived at some out-of-the-way lodge, hearts racing with freakish excitement, were any of these human oddities on display? No. No, they were not. Oftentimes I hold my quill in the face of such brash hucksterism, recalling Barnum’s words of yore and respecting one’s right to personal enterprise, howe’er surreptitious. However, after such a galling display of open knivery, I must hereby bellow from my perch as Public Defender of the Arts and declare all you good souls of Winona deceived! Yes, all 200 of you who packed Holzinger Lodge for the eight o’clock performance and then packed it again for the impromptu ten o’clock encore. You did not see a freak show! You were swindled by something so base, you would not look twice if it passed you on Gillette Street. Like any prominent act of smoke and mirrors, the 999 Eyes Freakshow began promising. That Damn Band sauntered in with whiteface and wild facial hair, playing songs of eastern Jewry though they hail from Austin,Texas.Their whimsical tunes did amuse me, as did the scintillatingly dressed Samantha X, emcee for the

Second Supper vol. 8, issue 119

evening, who would proclaim the wonders on display and asked her audience provocatively: “Are you tired of looking around and seeing only one head?” Of course we are! She then introduced her parade of “freaks,” or as I came to call them, “people you would likely not see anchoring the evening news.” There was Lobster Girl, a woman who allegedly had a claw so strong it could crush a man’s skull. Poppycock! This seven-fingered woman was a picture of normality — though, dare I say, also of soft sensuality — and she looked no more strange than my preparatory school instructor of industrial arts. Who else? The Dancing Dwarf was only strange in her particularly adroit sense of rhythm. Flipper Boy was just a dwarf who could drum, the Fire Clown didn’t immolate anything more than a patch near the cusp of his blazer, and as for the Elephant Man — why, I have uncles with more mass and back acne. Indeed, the only thing freakish about this Freakshow was the high cost of admission and the sheer number of saps that would pay to get in. Chumps, gulls, pushovers and ignoramuses, you have all been had!

To Advertise, call:

Blake at 608.797.6370 or Gregg at 608.397.8188

-COUPON-

Weekday Specials! 2-4-1

before noon

Start after 7, just $5! Par 3 Course

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(valid anytime) On Hwy. 33, East of La Crosse, WI - 608.788.6904 14


Reviews - your guide to consumption

Bibliophile Men Are Better than Women (2008) By Dick Masterson

Bavarian Lager Capital Brewery Madison, Wisconsin In the mid-19th century, brewers in Munich feared their dominance in the German beer market slipping away as their countrymen developed a taste for the new golden “Pilsner” lagers coming out of Bohemia. Münchens had been holding it down for years with their deep, dark blends, so when brewers from the Spaten Brewery sent a cask of its new Helles (“light”) beer to Hamburg on March 21,1894 for official tasting, beer historians made sure to write down the date. In the German tradition, “light” refers to color, not caloric or alcohol content, but it was still a bold switch for German lager-heads. Nonetheless, it has its fans, such as this reviewer from GermanBeerInstitute.com: “Helles is arguably the evolutionary Appearance: 8 epitome of Germany's more than Aroma: 8 three-thousandyear-old brewing Mouthfeel: 7 tradition. In terms of sheer brewing Taste: 9 artistry, it caps everything that Drinkability: 8 has gone before it, and nothing that has followed it has Total: 40 ever equaled it.” So it’s got a lot

to live up to, but the Capital Brewery’s take on the Helles — the unimaginatively titled Bavarian Lager — is a strong successor to that tradition. The beer pours a golden hue that is lighter than practically anything you’d find in a brown bottle and with a foamy head that quickly fades. Really, after a few seconds in a pint glass I thought it most closely resembled a Milwaukee’s Best Light — which made it all the more impressive when I took the first sip. There’s a strong hint of honey in the nose, but the Bavarian Lager succeeds by not going too sweet. It slides evenly across the tongue before a crisp hop bite takes it to a quenching finish. The mouthfeel is light and drinkable, but not like the way 20 Coors Lights are drinkable. No, the Bavarian Lager displays an artful malt balance which gives it one of the most mellow flavors you’ll find in any domestic lager. So compliments to the Capital Brewery on nailing the Helles style, but a delicious six-pack can’t help but beg the question: if we’ve known this Bavarian-style lager has been great for 114 years, why do we even put up with the other kind? — Adam Bissen

It’s kind of an attention getting title, isn’t it? It’s the sort of title that leads to ladies reaching for their mace and the dudes grabbing for their seasons of The Man Show. Well, put all that away. This book isn’t a Tucker Max Bro-stravaganza, where the rich kids play Mushy Cookie with all of womankind. And though this book’s style shares many similarities with the Ritalin-immune ninja worship of Robert Hamburger’s Real Ultimate Power, there is enough biting satire here to lend it some merit. Really, the title of this book is inaccurate; if it was titled Ernest Hemingway Is Better than Sex and the City, (and Hallelujah to that!) we’d have a more accurate glimpse of the cockeyed aims of this book. Consider this ridiculous work to be the Friar’s Club Roast for women, and consider Dick Masterson to be its version of Don Rickles. He’s clearly out to bust some chops, though his arguments are often so knowingly full of shit that neither gender escapes being the butt of his sarcasm. True, Masterson unrepentantly assaults the omnipresent Princess Complex that festers in weekly tabloids, romance novels, and Sweet 16 reality shows. When you cut all of his blustering away, there are some valid and serious points made against the bait-and-switch of female empowerment for the same old stereotypes of shallowness and materialism. Then again, statements like “Marie Curie was the Courtney Love of the 1920s” or that all men are sensitive philosopher-kings are clearly full of shit. These assertions could only be taken seriously by someone totally devoid of humor and irony, utterly under the spell of gender brand loyalty. Male or female, these people are Masterson’s targets, and while his satire isn’t the pinnacle of wit, it’s far more clever than any gender partisan will be willing to admit. Incidentally, the book is funny. For every example we could give of a MySpace hooker or a Prada socialite, we can give equal account of brilliant women who aren’t fueled by Cosmo and Oprah. Besides, with the way that the gentlemen of the Midwest treated Brett Favre’s retirement like it was the goddamn JFK assassination, men at large aren’t exactly swimming in cool points either. But the problem isn’t merely a boys versus girls playground scrap. Stereotypes from all over have a disturbing tendency to be followed and obeyed, and mass media has increased this danger into religious levels. Any person who chooses to be an individual, above any and all demographics, is worth a hundred who haven’t. All 101 might need to have a good laugh at each other, every so often. — Brett Emerson

Butter Nut Creme $12 / pound at the Briar Patch

ireless W e e Fr et! Intern ig Ten NFL, B rk! Netwo

Great Study Environment right across from Onalaska High! 426 2nd Ave South Onalaska, WI 608.781.9999 - www.thetimbers.biz

(southwestern) 15

(soups & sandwiches)

This brew is very reminiscent of Chock full o' Nuts brand coffee, the New York coffee that actually started out as a fine nut boutique. As the name implies, this coffee is extremely "nutty", but what exactly does that mean? "Nutty" refers to the dark, distinguished flavor that comes from roasting beans to a fine dark color. The resulting tastes are oily, heavy and very like dark chocolate. This Butter Nut Creme relies on that traditional base of nutty goodness, while mellowing it out with some creme flavoring. The end-product is delicious, both complex and satisfying. The aroma of these beans is extremely pleasing — with memories of Bavarian-glazed pecans and almonds induced. The brew is dependable and capable of doing that heavy lifting needed in the morning. For those with weak pallets, try this brew for a good, pleasing cup of coffee that won't get old. I actually wouldn't recommend this cup as a dessert coffee, simply because the flavors are somewhat "normal" and pretty subdued compared to most dessert coffees. However, this cup does go very well with a lump of sugar and dollop of cream, so go ahead, get crazy! — Joel Kuennen

June 12, 2008


I'm Jonesin' for a crossword "Center Piece" -- no theme, but a wide-open middle. By Matt Jones

Down 1 Pattern of six horizontal lines found in the I Ching 2 Role that earned Marion Cotillard a

Best Actress Oscar 3 Gets high 4 48-across, in 48-across 5 Sorority letters 6 Bone next to the humerus 7 “Raging Bull” boxer Jake La ___ 8 “Damn, it’s cold!” 9 “Weetzie Bat” author Francesca ___ Block 10 Like schedulechanging weather 11 Shirley who was painted gold in “Goldfinger” 12 Impassive 13 Short and sweet, as speeches go 14 Luxury car manufacturer bought by India’s Tata Motors in 2008 23 Like Leroy Brown, in a Jim Croce song 24 “___ you jest!” 26 Mail-in offer 27 Lipton product, as marketed in some European countries 28 Meat Puppets song covered by Nirvana on “MTV Unplugged” 29 Pageant headgear 32 Cloying to the max 33 “Coal Miner’s Daughter” subject 34 Phrase said after smacking one’s forehead 36 Series accompanying a museum display 38 Company that owns Coffee-Mate

Second Supper vol. 8, issue 119

42 TMZ subject 43 University of Maine town 44 George who was greeted with “Norm!” 45 “Poison” shrub 46 Entertain 49 ___ precedent 50 Victoria’s Secret purchase 51 Breads for Reubens 54 Part of RSVP 55 Song that follows “Sunday Bloody Sunday” on the album “U218 Singles” ©2008 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com) For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle #0361. Answers to Issue 119's "Repeat After Me"

Across 1 That girl 4 Like the most fragile of cookies 14 One who obeys The Force 15 Treat pool water, maybe 16 “Evil” Bush grouping 17 Type of worker theorized to have built the Death Star, according to a “Clerks” bit 18 Airport terminal area 19 It’s usually taken by high school jrs. 20 Meg’s mom, on “Family Guy” 21 Disgusted grunts 22 Mark on an attendance record 25 1970s synthesizer brand 26 Be civilly disobedient 30 ___ Shinrikyo (Japanese group that carried out a 1995 sarin attack in Tokyo) 31 Perform a family task 35 Answer that’s up in the air 37 One who comes from a separate egg 39 Tribe of the southwestern U.S. 40 MTV2 comedian Milonakis 41 “___ Mine” (George Harrison song) 42 Legumes with a “black-eyed” variety 46 A long, long time 47 “...___ saw Elba” (part of a famous palindrome) 48 Superpower that left the map in the 1990s 52 Get all mushy 53 With a feeling of isolation 56 Gas or elec., e.g. 57 Stays unresolved 58 Trig function 59 Jobs for openers 60 Summer in la cite

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Film Reviews The Incredible Hulk (2008) Director: Louis Leterrier Cast: Edward Norton, Liv Tyler,William Hurt Writers: Zak Penn and Edward Norton (uncredited) By Nicholas Cabreza

nicholas.cabreza@secondsupper.com Hulk (2003) co-writer James Schamus was unaware that Hulk fans expect action. Like a fool on crack, Schamus and director Ang Lee didn't include a climactic finale, or much action otherwise. The Incredible Hulk (2008) screenwriter Zak Penn responds with an equally unbalanced script, this one heavy on action but light on plot. From the Prometheus motif a la Frankenstein's monster to the unwanted effects of Cold War nuclear armament, this franchise has never been short on interesting subtexts. Sadly, wherever Penn went to film school, the concepts of theme and motif were not taught. It did, however, teach something that Schamus' school didn't: action. The Incredible Hulk is a hypocritical film: it tells us that Bruce Banner (Edward Norton) hates the Hulk and wants to eliminate him. But why? He has the coolest super power ever, and only uses it to defend himself — why get rid of it? "But Cabreza, it's an action movie, don't look into it too deeply." Now I enjoy carnage as much as the next guy, but this story is too bland to satisfy the adult in me. I can't buy Ban-

ner hating the Hulk because the film paints the Hulk as a hero, not as a menace. Hulk isn't a rampaging monster, he's a victim. If you show me that Hulk is a menace who hurts innocent people and causes unsolicited destruction, then I'll sympathize with Banner's cause; but show me that he's a bad-ass hero and I'll agree with General Thunderbolt Ross (William Hurt), that Hulk should be utilized to defend the country. The film wants us to believe that Banner is the protagonist and Hulk is an antagonist, but Penn does a terrible job of convincing us that Banner and Hulk are two separate beings. Three words, Hulk versus Abomination, are worth the price of admission, though the ending is more interested in segueing into a sequel than offering any resolution. The film's best performance belongs to Tim Roth, who pulls a Topher Grace/Venom by not transforming into Abomination until the long-awaited final showdown. The action is beyond awesome, but the rest of the movie is little more than an opportunity to get up and use the bathroom. So Ang Lee's Hulk has a lot of story, and this Hulk has a lot of action — now if they could just make one with both...

Cult Classics Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Touch of Satan (1998) Directed by:Tom Laughlin Starring: Michael Berry, Emby Mellay Written by: James E. McLarty By Brett Emerson

brett.emerson@secondsupper.com The second masterpiece in the awesome Volume 5 has perhaps the greatest line in cinematic history. As the Ryan O’Neil-y hero follows a saucy witch around her family’s pond, the girl stares longingly into the water, and after the 3 billionth awkward pause in this film, she says, “this is where the fish lives.” WHAT?! Not many fish, just ONE fish. Needless to say, Mike Nelson and his robot henchmen tear this insipid (and grammatically questionable) musing apart. Where Volume 5’s “Time Chasers” is a ridiculous movie made more ridiculous by MST3K’s jabs, “The Touch of Satan” is more of an awkward film that is totally redeemed by its comedic makeover. This isn’t to say that the dense amusements of this flick would go unnoticed without the mockery — it’s that these quips are so dead on that it transforms this lackluster spook film into a new breed of awesome. This cinematic equivalent of Peter Brady’s love life opens with the stereotypical '70s

17

feather-haired hero taking a nice, leisurely drive in his stereotypical '70s orange Maverick. Really, the only thing distinguishing the opening credits from an episode of The Dukes of Hazzard is the lack of an equally dim cousin and a Confederate paintjob on the hood. Our Bo Duke pulls into town, and gets warned by the town gas pumper to beware a “fromacidal maniac” who’s been pitchforking the locals. Needless to say, the dummy laughs off this doofus oracle. Sure enough, the plucked-turkey-EdgarWinter-looking fromacidal maniac enters his life, along with the rest of her walnut-ranching family. Being a shining paragon of '70s machismo, our guy wolfs the farmer’s daughter, the aforementioned idiot witch. She looks like the spawn of Jacko and Jack White, which is diabolical enough, though it is her sedated acting which truly makes her an instrument of the dark side. The love which unfolds between these two makes me want an old lady to pitchfork me in the throat. Yet despite this, the film’s working over at the hands of the MST3K goons has made The Touch of Satan a glittering treasure. The cast skewers this movie with a laser precision that even they have been hard-pressed to equal. There are so many glorious jokes in this movie that it’s impossible to list them all, but they all will leave you on the floor, curled up and howling. Just like Satan.

Men’s day Wednesdays til 4:02 just $8!

Ladies’ Day Thursdays til 4:02 Just $8! June 12, 2008


Happenings classifieds 2001 18ft Bayliner ski boat snap fit cover, 125hp Mercury, ski pylon 608-385-5315, $9400 2001 Jeep Cherokee Sport blue, cd, pl, pw, 262-893-8313, $5900 Oak Entertainment Center Glass Doors 262-893-8313, $150 1998 Mazda Protege LX Manual 5-speed, in good condtion. Only 101,000 miles. Gets 30 mpg. Asking $2800 or best offer. Papasan chair From World Market. Dark wood frame, cushion has dark blue/white print. Asking $30 or best offer Desk length: 41" width: 22" Has cubby underneath on right side. Basic wood with dark finish. Big enough for a computer monitor. Chair not included. Asking $20 or best offer

GOT SOMETHING TO HAWK? We’re starting a new classifieds section just for you. For $10/wk, you get three lines (25 words) to get rid of that old grill, those sweet rollerblades, promo your Garage Sale, or sell that extra kidney quick! (Just kidding, that’s not legal.)

Interested? send your 25 words to: copyeditor@secondsupper.com Submissions will be edited for length and inappropriate content. Please include current billing address and contact info.

upcoming events OPEN STAGE/MIC

Every Thursday Bluffland Bloom & Brew La Crosse 8 p.m. - 11 p.m. Free and open to all ages ULTIMATE FRISBEE

Every Friday Riverside Park 5 p.m. Pickup game. All skill levels welcome! FIGURE DRAWING

Every Wednesday Bluffland Bloom & Brew La Crosse 7 p.m. - 9 p.m. cost is $3

upcoming events NORSKEDALEN'S MIDSUMMER FEST

June 20 - 22 Norskedalen Nature & Heritage Center, Hwy PI 3 miles North of Coon Valley, Wis. 608-452-3424 www.norskedalen.com $5 for adults, $2 for children, $12 per family Scandinavian-style celebration. Friday's evening bonfire, food and music goes from 5-10 p.m. Saturday, and 10 a.m.-5 p.m Sunday. Filled with old-time demonstrations, Norwegian arts and crafts, wagon rides, children's activites and lots of delicious food. JAZZ IN THE PARK June 22 Riverside Park 7:00 p.m. With Great River Big Band. Rain site: City Brewery Hosp. Center LA CROSSE LOGGERS GAME

June 27 Copeland Park 608-796-9553 www.lacrosseloggers.com Loggers vs. Rochester Honkers 7:05 p.m. Friday Night Fireworks and Peanut Free Night presented by Allergy Associates of La Crosse! ILLUSIONS THE SHOW

July 3 Loons La Crosse www.illusionstheshow.com 9:00 p.m. Before 8 p.m., $7 After 8 p.m., $8 A benefit show for the WAFER Food Pantry and the Coulee Region Humane Society. Illusions is a variety show with female impersonators and live vocalists. RAIL FAIR

July 19 Copeland Park La Crosse 10:00 a.m. - 5:00 p.m. $4 admission, free for kids under 12 608-582-4761 www.4000foundation.com Buy, sell, trade model and toy trains, railroadiana, antique toys, diecast models. Railroad exhibits and displays, flea market and swap meet. Plus, guided tours of the steam locomotive, caboose, and grand crossing tower. All proceeds go to maintain and restore the La Crosse Short Line Railroad Museum.

art galleries

camping

BLUFFLAND BLOOM & BREW 119 S. 4th St., La Crosse (608) 782-BREW Monthly Culture Shock show, featuring live art as well as drawings, paintings, photography, and prints by local artists.

GOOSE ISLAND 3 mi. south of La Crosse on Hwy 35 W6488 County Road GI Stoddard, WI 608-788-7018 Open until October 30

HEIDER CENTER FOR THE ARTS 405 East Hamlin St. West Salem, WI 608-786-1220 x 4 http://www.wsalem.k12.wi.us/ Heider.html PUMP HOUSE REGIONAL CENTER FOR THE ARTS Open noon-5 p.m. Tuesday through Friday, and noon-4 p.m. Saturday. No admission charge, donations accepted. Features exhibits of local artists and performances. 119 King St., La Crosse 608-785-1434 www.thepumphouse.org. SATORI ARTS Unique hand crafted jewelry, Mississippi River pearls, ancient Chinese artifacts, Custom-made jewelry, original art works, and a variety of unique gifts. 201 Pearl Street, La Crosse 608-785-2779 UW-L ART GALLERY The gallery displays works by students, faculty, regional and nationally-known artists in all areas of art. The gallery is on the first floor of the Center for the Arts located at the corner of 16th and Pine on the UW-L campus. VISIONS OF LIGHT Stained Glass 129 4th St S, La Crosse 608-793-1032 GREEN BAY STREET STUDIO greenbaystreetstudio.blogspot.com 1500 Green Bay St., La Crosse Hours currently by appointment only.Various workshops, including painting and printmaking, coming this summer, as well as opportunity for full and part-time membership.

VETERANS MEMORIAL 9 mi. east of La Crosse on Hwy 16 N4668 County Road VP West Salem, WI 608 786-4011 Open until October 15 WHISPERING PINES 15 minutes north of La Crosse, on Hwy 53 925 Dana Ln. Holmen, WI 608-526-2152 NESHONOC LAKESIDE CAMP RESORT N5334 Neshonoc Rd. West Salem, WI 608-786-1792 PETTIBONE PARK RESORT 333 Park Plaza Dr. La Crosse, WI 608-782-5858 GREAT RIVER BLUFFS STATE PARK 43605 Kipp Drive Winona, MN 507-643-6849 BEAVER CREEK VALLEY 15954 County 1 Caledonia, MN 507-724-2107

performances THE SOMEWHAT TRUE TALE OF ROBIN HOOD

La Crosse Community Theatre 118 5th Ave N 608-784-9292 www.lacrossecommunitytheatre.org A frantically funny, Monty Pythonesque retelling of the classic. June 13-15 and 20-21at 7:30 p.m. June 14, 15, 21, and 22 at 1:00 p.m. HARVEY

ODIN WHITE MOTH GALLERY AND TEA ROOM 715 Logan St., La Crosse 608-769-3963 Hours are Tues: 12-3 pm, Thurs: 4-7 pm, Fri: 12-3, Sat: 10-2. Call for an appointment or more info. Enjoy some tea, art and vintage stuff.

Commonweal Theatre 208 Parkway Avenue North Lanesboro, MN 800-657-7025 www.commonwealtheatre.org Dreams and dreamers figure prominently in this 1940s comedy. Running from May 31-October 25.

art exhibits A SEASON OF ART

First Saturday in June - Sept. 7203 N. Shore Drive, County Z Brice Prairie, on Lake Onalaska. (Look for the white barn) Enjoy extraordinary shopping at an outdoor art fair. This FREE event is sponsored by the La Crosse Society of Arts & Crafts. Open 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. WRAP (WISCONSIN REGIONAL ARTISTS PROGRAM) EVENT

June 6 through June 30 Pump House, Kader Room Variety of Media. Workshop is June 30, from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. UCHIKAKE: WEDDING KIMONOS

July 24 through August 30 Pump House (La Crosse) Lecture and fashion show July 25

farmers' markets CAMERON PARK Every Friday, May - October 4 p.m. - 8 p.m. Downtown La Crosse Fresh produce, pasture-raised buffalo and beef, honey, maple syrup, plants, artists, handmade jewelry, paintings, beeswax candles, live performances and more! BRIDGEVIEW PLAZA Every Wednesday, June - Oct. 8 a.m. - 1 p.m. Bridgeview Plaza parking lot Northside of La Crosse LA CROSSE COUNTY Every Saturday, June - Oct. 6 a.m. - 1 p.m. County parking lot Downtown La Crosse CROSSING MEADOWS Every Sunday, June - Oct. 8 a.m. - 1 p.m. Festival Foods parking lot Onalaska WINONA Every Saturday, 7:30 a.m. - noon Every Wednesday, 2 p.m. - 5 p.m. May - October Downtown Winona Fresh produce, plants, eggs, chicken, turkey, beef, elk & buffalo meat, bakery. jams, pickles, honey, decorative gourds, wreaths & Indian corn. Our herbalists bring salves, teas, & catnip.

Trying to get the word out about your event? It's simple! 1 Second Supper vol. 8, issue 119

Email copyeditor@secondsupper.com and receive a free listing.

18 April 24, 2008


spotlight GREAT RIVER

SHAKESPEARE FESTIVAL

Winona, Minnesota June 27 - July 27 www.grsf.org Now in its ďŹ fth season, the Great River Shakespeare Festival began in 2004 at the Winona State University Performing Arts Center and has grown ever since.

2008 Productions:

The Merchant of Venice &

The Taming of the Shrew Opening Schedule: Wed, June 25 Preview: The Merchant of Venice, 7:30 p.m.

Thurs, June 26 Preview: The Taming of the Shrew, 7:30 p.m

Friday, June 27 Opening: The Merchant of Venice, 8:00 p.m. Reception following at Winona National Bank

Saturday, June 28 Opening: The Taming of the Shrew, 8:00 p.m Free concert following at Levee Park: James Armstrong

Sunday, June 29 The Taming of the Shrew, 4:30 p.m.

GRSF also features education programs designed to make Shakespeare accessible and engaging for learners of all ages. This year's programs include: - A city-wide sonnet contest co-sponsored by Winona's Poet Laureate Jim Armstrong - Discussions with local scholars about the season's plays - Free concerts on campus at Winona State University before Friday and Saturday evening performances - Open community forums about The Merchant of Venice and The Taming of the Shrew - Workshop teaching techniques of stage combat - Teacher resources: scripts, web links, handouts and research about Shakespeare and his plays - ...and many more! Weeknights & Matinees $20 / $25 / $30 Fri/Sat Evening $25 / $30 / $35 Previews $15 Discounts for seniors, groups, students, and military!

19 Supper vol. 8, issue 113 Second

2 June 12, 2008


COMMUNITY SERVICE [ Area LA CROSSE All Star Lanes 4735 Mormon Coulee

Alpine Inn W5715 Bliss rd.

Alumni

620 Gillette st.

Barrel Inn 2005 West ave.

Beef & Etc.

1203 La Crosse st.

Big Al’s

115 S 3rd st.

Brothers 306 Pearl st.

Sunday

Monday

3 games for $5 starts at 8 p.m.

3 games for $5 starts at 8 p.m.

bucket special

Bud Night 6 - CL: $1.75 bottles $5 pitchers

Beer Pong $7.00 4 Cans 8-close

Chuck’s

1101 La Crosse st.

Coconut Joe’s 223 Pearl st.

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

Buck Night starts at 6 p.m.

Import night starts at 7 p.m.

Cosmic Bowl & Karaoke starts at 9 p.m.

Cosmic Bowl starts at 9 p.m.

3 games for $5 starts at 7 p.m. 6 - CL $2.50 Sparks

$1 softshell tacos $1 shots of doctor, cherry doctor

3-7 happy hour

$2 Silos

$5 bbq ribs and fries

AUCE wings $5.00 free crazy bingo buy one cherry bomb get one for $1

bucket night 6 for $9

$6.00 AUCD

3 p.m. - midnight 25 cent hot wings $1 shots of Dr.

Italian beef w/dog meal: $6.69 Pizza Puff meal: $4.49

meatball sandwich sandwich meatball meal: $6.15 $6.69 meal: Chicago dogs meal: 22 dogs meal: $ 5.25 $5.89

Italian beef meal: $6.15 $6.69 Chicago chili dog: $3.45 $3.89

grilled chicken sandwich meal: $5.29 Polish sausage meal: $3.99 $4.49

hamburger meal: or cheeseburger meal: $3.69 $3.89 cheeseburger meal: Italian Beef w/dog $3.89 meal: $7.89

free pitcher of beer or soda with large pizza

meat or marinara spaghetti: $3.45 Italian sausage: $4.95

$1.25 make your own tacos, $4.75 taco salad $2.25 margaritas, $2 off large taco pizza

$2.25 burgers, $2.60 cheeseburgers, $2 off large pizza, $1 fries with any pizza

soup or salad bar FREE with entree or sandwich until 3 p.m. ($3.95 by itself)

closed

$2.50 Blatz vs. Old Style pitchers

Thirsty $1.50 Tuesday U-Call-Its

Martini Madness $2 off all martinis

closed

$1 Dr. shots $3 Jager Bombs

2 for 1 taps

7 - CL $1 domestic 12 oz $2 Stoli mixers

7 - CL Tequila’s chips & salsa, $2 Coronas, $2.50 Mike’s, Mike-arita

7 - midnight Ladies: 2 for 1 Guys: $1.50 Coors and Kul Light bottles

7 - midnight $1 rail mixers $2 Bacardi mixers

7 - midnight $2 Malibu madness $2 pineapple upsidedown cake

$3.00 Domestic Pitchers, $2.00 Shots of Cuervo, Rumpleminz, Goldschlager

Mexican Monday $2.00 Corona, Corona Light, Cuervo

HAPPY HOUR 3 PM - 8 PM

114 5th ave.

318 Pearl st.

Tuesday Wednesday

1/4 barrel giveaway 8-11 $1 burgers

2 for 1 cans & bottles during Packer games

The Cavalier CheapShots

16oz top sirloin $7 22oz tbone 9.75 sutffed sirloin 8 jack daniels tips 8 $1 shots of Doctor, cherry doctor - 8-cl Happy hour 4-6 $1.75 cans, $2 mix drinks

food & drink specials ]

10 cent wings (9 - CL) 10 cent wings (9 - CL) $1 High Life bottles $1.25 High Life bottles $1.50 rail mixers $1.50 rail mixers $2 Guinness pints

Wristband Night

batterfried cod, fries, beans, and garlic bread $5.50

$4.50 domestic pitchers barrel parties at cost pepper & egg sandwich meal: $4.50, $5.00 fish sandwich meal:meal: $4.99, Italian sausage Italian $6.69 sausage meal: $6.15

Italian beef meal: $6.15 $6.69 2 Chicago dog meal: $3.45 $5.89

$6.75 shrimp dinner

$1.50 bloody marys 11 a.m. - 4 p.m

$3.00 Three Olives mixers/ $3.00 Captain mixers/ mojitos mojitos $2 Cherry $2 CherryBombs Bombs $1 Bazooka Joes $1 Bazooka Joes $3.25 Big Ass Miller Lite

HAPPY HOUR 4 - 7

50 cent taps 4 - 7 (increases 50 cents per hour) $1 rails

All day, everyday: $1.00 Shots of Doctor, $2.00 Cherry Bombs, $1.75 Silos of Busch Light/Coors

closed

closed

$.50 domestic taps, $1 microbrews, $3 domestic pitchers, $6 microbrew pitchers

$2.00 Cruzan Rum Mixers, $2.50 Jameson Shots, $3.00 Mixers

$3.00 Patron Shots

$2 Tuesdays, including $2 bottles, import taps, beer pong, apps, single shot mixers, featured shots, and 50 cent taps

WING NIGHT-$1.25/LB BUFFALO, SMOKEY BBQ, PLAIN $1.00 PABST AND PABST LIGHT BOTTLES$1.50 ROLLING ROCK BOTTLES $2.25 BUD LIGHTS $1.00 SHOT OF THE WEEK

$2.00 Captain Mixers

Wristband Night $5 COLLEGE I.D. $9 general public

$1 Kul Light cans

Topless Tuesday

Ladies Night buy one, get one free wear a bikini, drink free

Karaoke $1 shot specials

live DJ $1 shot specials

chicken & veggie fajitas for two

football night dollar domestic beer: $1.50 burgers Mexican beer: $2.00

chicken dollar primavera burgers

shrimp Great food and burrito drinks

chili Happy Hour 4-6 verde $1.75 domestics

Ask server Fish for details

chicken & own veggie Build your fajitas Bloody Mary N3287 CountyCoulee OA 5200 Mormon for two 16oz Mug - $4.00

Homemade Pizza domestic beer: $1.50 & PItcher of $2.00 Beer Mexican beer: $9.00

football night

chicken $1.25 primavera BURGERS

Homemade Pizza & PItcher of Beer $9.00 $5.99

beer pong 6 p.m. $8.95$1.25 16 oz steak

411 3rd st.

Fiesta Mexicana The Elite 5200 Mormon 412 Main st. Coulee

Fox Hollow Fiesta Mexicana Goal Post Fox Hollow 1904 Campbell rd.

N3287 County OA

Gracie’s Goal Post 1908 Campbell rd.

Build your own Bloody Mary 16oz Mug - $4.00

1904 Campbell rd.

Gracie’s Huck Finn’s 1908Marina Campbell 127 dr. rd.

Bloody Mary specials 10 - 2

Bloody Mary domestic Huck Finn’s $1.75 JB’s Speakeasy specials

127 Rose Marinast.dr. 717

bottles

10 - 2119 Second Supper vol. 8, issue 3

HAPPY HOUR EVERYDAY 3 - 6 shrimp

HAPPY HOUR 6HOUR AM - 9 AMEVERYDAY HAPPY free wingsof6 p.m. - 9 p.m. Bucket Domestic

gyro fries & soda

BURGERS Cans 5 for $9.00 Buy one gyro free baklava, ice HAPPY HOUR 6 AM - 9 AM get one cream or sundae beer pong 6 p.m. free wings - 9 p.m. half price with6 p.m. meal $8.95 16 oz steak

$5.99 gyro fries & soda

EVERYDAY BuyHAPPY one gyroHOURfree baklava, ice3 get one cream or sundae half price with meal

$1.75 domestic bottles

chili 25 Cent Wings verde

Bucket of Domestic burrito Cans 5 for $9.00

$1.75 domestic HAPPY HOUR bottles

3-6 HAPPY HOUR 25 Cent Wings 5 p.m. - 10 p.m.

$1.25 domestic taps buy one burger HAPPY HOUR get one half price 5 p.m. - 10 p.m.

-7 $1.25 and 9domestic - 11 taps buy one burger get one half price

$2.00 Malibu, $2.50 Jaeger, $3.00 Jaeger Bombs

$2.50 JUMBO CAPTAIN AND FLAVORED BACARDI MIXERS $3.00 JAGER BOMBS

$4 full pint Irish Car Bomb

Dan’s Place

$3.00 Bacardi mixers/ $3.00 Bacardi mixers/ mojitos mojitos $2 Cherry $2 CherryBombs Bombs $1 Bazooka Joes $1 Bazooka Joes $3.25 Big Ass Miller Lite

Fry

Karaoke

reservations available

Ask server for details HAPPY HOUR 3 - 8 $8.95 16 oz. steak $8.95 1/2 lb. fish platter

buy oneHOUR appetizer HAPPY 3-8

GREEK ALL DAY appetizer half price with meal

buy one appetizer get one half price

GREEK ALL DAY appetizer half price with meal

$8.95 oz. steak get one16half price $8.95 1/2 lb. fish platter

HAPPY HOUR 5 - 7 EVERYDAY 3 -7 and 9 - 11 20 April 24, 2008


]

COMMUNITY SERVICE [

Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday LA CROSSE Sunday Area food & drink specials HAPPY HOUR 5 - 7 $1.75 domestic JB’s Speakeasy $1.75 domestic $1.75 domestic bottles bottles bottles 717 Rose st. Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday LA CROSSE HAPPY HOUR EVERYDAY 4 - 8, $2 domestic beer and rail drinks The Joint $2 Love Stories ALL DAY, EVERYDAY $1 shots of Dr. $5 Wu Tang Teas $1.00 off all Irish shots $2.50 pints of Guinness $3.00 imperial pints

$5 Wu Tang Teas $1 shots of the DOC!

324 Jay st.

Legend’s 223 Pearl st.

The Library 123 3rd st.

closed find come in and find out ... you’ll be glad you did

Loons

1128 La Crosse st.

Nutbush

3264 George st.

Ralph's Ringside In John's 223 PearlBar st. 109 3rd st. N

25 wings: $5 bucket of beer: $12 during Packers games

breakfast buffet $9.95 closed 10 a.m. - 2 p.m.

Shooter’s Schmidty’s

breakfast buffet $1 cans $9.95 Hamm’s 10 a.m. - 2 p.m.

120 3rd st.rd. 3119S State

closed

closed

$1taps taps $1 $1 rails rails $1 1/2 price Tequila

hamburger $1.25 cheeseburger $150

bacon cheeseburger, fries, mug of beer: $4.50 drummies, fries, mug of beer: $5

Pizza & pitcher

Chef specials daily closed closed Mighty Meatball sub $6

Schmidty’s Ringside 3119Pearl Statest.rd. 223

closed

WING NIGHT $2 SVEDKA MIXERS $2.50 JACK MIXERS $2.25 BUD LIGHTS $2 SHOTS OF ALL DOCTOR FLAVORS

closed $1 cans PBR

KARAOKE $1.25 domestic pints $2 double rails $3 double calls $2 ALL bottles chicken fifilet, let, fries, pop: $4.75 filet, fries, beer: $5 chicken filet, mushroom/swiss, fries, pop: $4.25, mushroom/swiss, fries, beer: $4.50

HAPPY HOUR 3 - 6

$1 tacos, Ladies Night 2 for 1, 9 - CL

BUCK WED burger, hot dog or brat

$2 mixers, taps, bottles chicken parmesan $1.00 OFF YOUR $6 CHOICEsub OF FOOD

Fiesta Night 7 - 12 happyshots hour $2 tequila all day $2.50 margaritas

$1.50 PBR bottles $1.50 Dr. shots $4 domestic after 7 p.m. pitchers

$1.75 domestic HAPPY 10 AM - 12, 4 $1.25 Lite taps all HOUR day bottlesCow & $2 Bacardi $2 Spotted $1.50 rails 10 - 1 7 - 12 pints mixers DT Brown

$1 Point Fiesta Night special 7 - 12 bottles $2 tequila shots $2.50 margaritas

$2.50 $1.50 PBRpints bottles Bass & Dr. Guinness $1.50 shots after 7 p.m.

$1.25 Lite taps all day bottles $1.50 rails 10 - 1

$1 Point special bottles

$2.50 pints Bass & Guinness 8 - CL $1.50 rails $1.75 Bud cans

Yesterdays LA CRESCENT 317 Pearl st.

Crescent Inn 444 Chestnut st.

LA CRESCENT

Crescent Inn Speedy Taco 444 301 Chestnut Kistler dr.st.

WINONA Betty Jo Byoloski’s

66 Center st.

Brothers 129 W 3rd st.

Godfather’s 30 Walnut st.

Sunday

$2 Rolling Rocks $2 domestic beer

Sunday

Monday Monday

Family pack: $2 Rolling Rocks 10 tacos & 4 sodas $2 domestic beer for $14.99

8 -on CLthe go: burritos railsand buy a$1.50 big one cans get$1.75 a freeBud soda

Sunday

Monday

$5.00 for 25 wings

AUCE fifish sh fry DJ 9 - CL

HAPPY HOUR 10 AM - 12, 4 PM - 6 PM

Top Shots Tailgators 137 S 4th st.

fish sandwich, fries, mug fish of beer: $5 fish sandwich, fries, pop: fish $4.75

$1 cans cans $1 cans LUNCH$1 BUFFET $6.45 Busch Light Busch Light Old Style LUNCH SPECIALS CHANGE DAILY

cans $4 $1 domestic PBR pitchers

Yesterdays Top Shots 317 Pearl st.

cheeseburger, fries, pop: $4 cheeseburger, fries, beer: $4.25 Philly or Reuben, fries, pop: $5.75, Philly or Reuben, fries, beer: $6

HAPPY HOUR 4 PM - 7 PM BUFFET $2 mixers, taps, bottlesLUNCH $1.00 OFF CHICKEN $6.45 HOOP DAY!! MAKE SPECIALS CHANGE DAILY $1.00 OFF YOURLUNCHPHILLY, $1.00 OFF YOUR SHOT AND CHOICE OF FOOD CHEESE CURDS YOUR ENTRÉE IS FREE!

happy hour all day Packer games: $1.50 $1 cans Coors Light Silver, $1 Hamm’s Dr. shots, free brats

137 SS4th st.st. 1019 10th

$3 Bacardi Mixers $3 jumbo Long Islands

$5

and parmesan &6

$1Bacardi cans $2 Busch Light mixers

$1 cansCow & $2 Spotted Busch Light DT Brown pints

$1.75 domestic

$1 cans

Bucket Night Old 5 forStyle $9 5 domestic bottles for PM - 6 PM $10, $2 Bacardi mixers,

$2.25 Pearl st. pints $1.75 domestic $1.50 PBR bottles bottles 7 - 12 $2.25 Pearl st. pints

$1.75 domestic Tuesday Wednesday $1.50 PBR bottles bottles

SHOTSOF OFGOLDSCHLAGER GOLDSLAGER $2$2SHOTS $5 DOUBLE VODKA ENERGY DRINK

Wristband Night

HAPPY HOUR 4 PM - 7 PM $1.00 OFF sandwich CHICKEN HOOPSouthwest DAY!! MAKE Italian PHILLY, $1.00peppers OFF YOURchicken SHOT AND pita w/banana CHEESE CURDS YOUR ENTRÉE IS FREE!

Tailgators Shooter’s 1019 10th 120 SS3rd st.st.

AFTER COMEDY: PINT NIGHT $1 PINTS OF RAILS MIXERS AND DOMESTIC TAPS $2 PINTS OF CALL MIXERS AND IMPORT TAPS $3 PINTS OF TOP SHELF MIXERS

closed

30 Walnut st. Second 21 Supper vol. 8, issue 113

half price appetizers, Import Club Night: discounts on all micros & imports $1 martinis $2 mojitos $3 margaritas & Michelob Golden pitchers

family buffet 5 -8 kids under 10 pay .45 cents per year of age

$1.25 pints during Badgers games DJ 9 - CL

$5.99 FISH SANDWICH FOR LUNCH, $6.99 FISH SANDWICH FOR DINNER, $9.99 ALL YOU CAN EAT FISH FRY ALL DAY

Chicken salad on rye w/ lettuce, tomato, onion $5

happy hour all day long! $1.00 OFF WILD WINGS, $1.00 PHILLY STEAK AND CHEESE.

$5.99 FISH SANDWICH FOR LUNCH, $6.99 FISH SANDWICH FOR DINNER, $9.99 ALL YOU CAN EAT FISH FRY ALL DAY

happy hour all day long! $1.00 OFF WILD WINGS, $1.00 PHILLY STEAK AND CHEESE.

$1 cans Miller High Life Light cans $1 Dr.$1 shots Miller High Life $3 16 oz Captain mixers Light

$1 cans PBR $1 Dr. $1shots cans $3 16 oz Captain PBR mixers

$2 Long Islands,

Night $1.50Bucket rail vodka mixers 10 -1 5 for $9

$1 PBR Dr. shots bottles, $3 16 oz Captain Captain mixers mixers

$2.75 deluxe $1 Dr. shots Bloodys 7, $4.50 $3 16 oz‘tilCaptain lite pitchers 7 - 12 mixers

$1.75 railsfor 5 domestic bottles $10, $1 $2 Bacardi mixers, PBR mugs $1.50 rail vodka mixers 10 -1

$2 Long Islands, PBR bottles, Captain mixers

$2.75 deluxe Bloodys ‘til 7, $4.50 lite pitchers 7 - 12

$1.75 rails

Thursday $1 PBR mugs

Friday

Saturday $2.50 Captain $2.50 Jager Bombs & Polish

$1 shots of Dr. $2.50 Polish

$1 domestic taps $3 Jager Bombs

$2 u-call-it (except top shelf)

Thursday

Friday

$1 shotstacos of Dr. Speedy $2.50 Polish $1.50

$1 domestic taps gyro, chips, soda $3 Jager Bombs $5.99

3 $2 chicken fry u-call-it taquitos (except top shelf) $3.99

Fiesta burrito $6.99

$2.50 Captain Nachos $2.50 Supreme Jager Bombs$5.49 & Polish

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

Tuesday Wednesday

Tuesday Wednesday HAPPY HOUR 3:15 - 6:15

2 for 1 burgers $1 off Bloodys & Screwdrivers

$3 Olives $3Three Captain mixers mixers $3 jumbo Long $3 jumbo Long Islands Islands

all-u-can-eat spaghetti all day $5.45 25 cent hot wings 4 - 10

tenderloin tips, shrooms, fries or potato, salad, roll $9.95 50 cents off top shelf liquor

free pitcher of pop or domestic beer with large pizza discounts on all domestic beer

HAPPY HOUR 3 PM - 8 PM $1 off anything that pours $1 O-Bombs/ 10 cent wings, $3 filled filled 2 for 1 mug ($1 tap refills, Bazooka Joes, refills, $2 anything rail refills) refills) $1 High Life Wristband Night 9 p.m. - close bottles/kamikaze shots

any jumbo, large, or large 1 topping pizza medium pizza up to 5 $9.99 toppings: $11.99 (get 2nd large for $5)

all day: all-u-can-eat fish fish $8.95 lunch: fish fish sandwich & fries $5.45 $2.50 Three Olives Mixers $2.50Long Captain $1.00 IslandsMixers $1.00Rail Root Beer Barrels $2.00 Mixers $3.50 Pitchers $6.00Domestic “Buck-its” (6 beers Hot$6.00) Shots Menu for $2.50 Big Ass Miller Lite

Saturday

Prime Rib specials, one child eats free with one adult entree 4 - 10: house wines $2.50 $2.50 Bacardi Mixers $2.50Long Bacardi Mixers $1.00 Islands $5.00Rail Fishbowls $2.00 Mixers $3.50 Pitchers $1.00Domestic O-bombs & Bazooka Hot Shots Menu Joes $2.50 Big Ass Miller Lite

4 June 12, 2008


Ã

Ã

Entertainment Directory 6/19 6/12 -- 6/25 6/18

La Crosse

Popcorn Tavern Tavern Popcorn The New Blend Something Jazz

Thursday, Thursday, June June 19 12 Dan’s Dan’s Place Place Live Live DJ DJ

Just A Roadie Away...

Sunday, Sunday, June June 22 15

The The Recovery Recovery Room Room Live Live DJ DJ Nutbush Nutbush Live Live DJ DJ Popcorn Popcorn Tavern Tavern TBA Nick Shattuck

9:00 9:00 9:00 9:00 10:00 10:00 10:00 10:00

Nighthawks Nighthawks Dave Dave Orr's Orr's Damn Damn Jam Jam 10:00 S&S Cycles' 50th Anniversary prerally party (only place to get comFriday, June 13 memorative armbands in advance) 10:00 All Star Lanes Karaoke 9:00 Friday, June 20 My Second Home All Star Lanes Karaoke 9:00 Karaoke 9:00 Player’s My Live Second DJ Home 10:00 Karaoke 9:00 Nutbush Player’s Live DJ 10:00 Live DJ 10:00 Popcorn Tavern Nutbush Bottom of the Barrel String Band Live DJ 10:00 Popcorn The JointTavern TBA Friday the 13th hip hop

10:00 10:00

Monday, June 16 Monday, June 23 George St. Pub George St. Open Pub Jam Adam Palm’s Adam Palm’s Open Jam Popcorn Tavern Popcorn Tavern Shawn's open Jam Shawn's open Jam

10:00 10:00

Minneapolis population population

9:00 9:00 10:00 10:00

Tuesday, June June 24 17 Tuesday, Nutbush Nutbush Live DJ DJ Live Popcorn Tavern Tavern Popcorn Paulie Paulie

10:00 10:00

Wednesday, June 25 Wednesday, June 18 Nighthawks Nighthawks The M.O.B. (Men of Blues) Irene Keenan Luedtke Jr. feat. Howard & Dave 8:00 Rodgers 10:00 Loon’s Comedy Night 8:30 Loon’s Comedy Night Library Karaoke Library

8:30

Karaoke Coconut’s Live DJ Coconut’s

9:00

9:00 10:00

387,970 387,970

Local AimeeHMann

The Rock Zoo Amphitheater Fri., 6/206/12 Minnesota Thurs.,

New TiestoRiders of The Purple Sage Mindless Self Indulgence The Detroit Cobras Cross Canadian Ragweed

Epic (formerly the Quest) Cabooze First Avenue Triple Rock Social Club Minnesota Zoo Amphitheater

Thurs., 6/12 Fri., 6/20 Thurs., 6/12 Fri., 6/20 Thurs., 6/19

Bon Iver, Andrew Bird, New Pornographers

Walker Art Center

Sat., 6/21

Madison Madison

population

10:00 10:00

population

223,389

223,389

Umphrey's McGee, STS9 (Sound Tribe Sector 9) Alliant Energy Center Hue Alchemy Cornmeal Memorial Union Terrace The Cotton Jones Basket Cafe Montmartre Poison,Ride Dokken, Sebastian Bach Alliant Energy Center Frisbie, Smoking Popes High Noon Saloon Lyle Lovett Overture Center for Arts Look What I Did, Psychostick Powerglove The Annex

Thurs., 7/10 Sat., 6/21 Fri., 7/11 Sun., 6/22 Sat., 7/12 Sun., 6/22 Sun., 7/13 Mon., 6/23

Menomonie Menomonie population

population

14,937

14,937

Heavy J and the Fantastics

The Waterfront Bar & Grill

Thurs., 6/12

10:00

Ultimate Frisbee Orchestra Wilson Park Fri., 6/20 Shoeless Revolution The Waterfront Bar & Grill Thurs., 8/7

Saturday, Saturday, June June 21 14

Live DJ Longhorn Karaoke Longhorn

10:00 10:00

The Waterfront Bar & Grill Sat., 6/21 The Waterfront Bar & Grill Tues., 9/2

All All Star Star Lanes Lanes Karaoke Karaoke

Karaoke Player’s Karaoke Player’s

The Breakfast U-Melt The Ragbirds Leo Kottke

The Waterfront Bar & Grill Mabel Tainter Theater

Sat., 6/21 Sat., 9/20

Karaoke Popcorn Tavern Brownie's open Jam Popcorn Tavern

10:00

Euforquestra

The Waterfront Bar & Grill

Sun., 6/29

Brownie's open Jam

10:00

B.B.Paul King Les

Potawatami Pabst TheaterCasino

Mon., 6/9 Sat., 6/21

She Wants Revenge, Israel Vibration, Be Your Nation Own Pet Outlaw

Turner Hall Hall Turner

Fri., 6/13 Sun., 6/22

AimeeNelson Mann Willie

Turner Hall Northern Lights Theater

Fri., 6/13 Wed., 6/25

Popcorn Popcorn Tavern Tavern The TBA Histronic

9:00 9:00 10:00 10:00

Players Players Live Live DJ DJ

10:00 10:00

Nutbush Nutbush Live Live DJ DJ

10:00 10:00

Nighthawks Bodega's 14th birthday! The Avey Brothers Something Jazz Blues Band10:00 5 Second Supper vol. 8, issue 119

10:00 10:00

Got aa show? show? Let Let us us know! know! We'll We'llput putititin,in,yo.yo. copyeditor@secondsupper.com copyeditor@secondsupper.com

Milwaukee Milwaukee

population population

602,782 602,782

22 April 24, 2008


La Crosse’s Iconic Course

On the corner of Losey BLVD & La Crosse St. Downtown La crosse, above fayze’s - 782-6622

Weekly 9 Ball Tournament on 9' Tables Every Saturday @ 3:00 $10 Entry Fee, 100% Payback

23

June 12, 2008


La Crosse’s Largest Sports Bar

At the corner of Third & Pearl

every Tuesday

Downtown La Crosse 223 Pearl St - Downtown La Crosse - 608-782-9192 CHECK OUT ALL OUR SPECIALS IN COMMUNITY SERV R RVICE


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