The Independent Spring 2016 by Scott McClure

Spring 2016 I www.ogr.org

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Inside: What Are You Looking for In an Answering Service?

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Table of Contents

Inside OGR

Why you must teach the WHYs. Dr. Alan Wolfelt examines how we communicate the importance of memorialization.

2016 Winners Circle Exemplary Service Award winners talk about the benefits of the Family Contact Program.

What you should look for in an answering service. Public relations specialist, Jessica Fowler, answers six important questions.

Design the life you want. Entrepreneurial consultant Clay Clark takes us through the steps of a successful life.

Young Professionals take Austin by storm. Two day Austin event takeaways.

Young Professionals Spotlight Jessica Goglin of Kuhler Funeral Homes in Huron, SD, shares her thoughts on funeral service.

Post-Conference webinars Can't make it to Vegas? These webinars give you the education you missed.

CALENDAR

President’s Message

Member Spotlight

Your Membership

Member News 32 In Memoriam

Exemplary Service

Milestone Anniversaries

New Members 39

OF EVENTS

[April 27-30]

[May 10]

Annual Conference & Supplier Showcase Las Vegas, NV

Post Conference Webinar Unhackable: Procedures for Protecting You and Your Client Families’ Info Eric Castiglia, Memorial Payment Solutions

[May 11] Post Conference Webinar How Body Presentation Can Make or Break the Casket Matt Smith, Mor-bid.com

[May 12]

[June 16]

Post Conference Webinar How Have the Talk of a Lifetime Will Increase ROI: A Case Study Quinn Eagan, Funeral Pre-Need Program

Webinar How to Write an Obituary Worth Reading Kim Stacey

The Independent® | Spring 2016

The Independent® is a benefit of membership in the International Order of the Golden Rule (OGR), a not-for-profit organization tax-exempt under Section 501(c)(6) of the Internal Revenue Code, Federal ID No. 43-1828432. Published quarterly, The Independent® is mailed the first full week of each new quarter. Send address changes to OGR, Attn: Mailing List, 9101 Burnet Rd., Suite 120, Austin, TX 78758. © 2015 International Order of the Golden Rule. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission is prohibited. Non-member subscriptions (USD): One year: $40; two years: $60; single copy: $11.50. Founded in 1928, OGR is composed of independently owned and operated funeral homes located throughout North America and overseas. Editorial material and letters of opinion are invited. Published articles reflect the opinions of the authors and do not necessarily represent the views of the association. OGR reserves the right to edit all submitted materials and does not assume responsibility for unsolicited materials. For author guidelines, contact the editor, (800) 637-8030, or visit www.ogr.org.

ADVERTISER’S INDEX Access Financial Group........................................29, 31 Chris Chigas, (800) 487-8220, ext. 8233 cc@afinancial.com | www.afinancial.com

BOAR D OF D IR EC TOR S President William Brock, Jr. CFSP

President-Elect Peter “Skip” Urban

Secretary-Treasurer Charles Castiglia, CSFP

Immediate Past President Wayne “Bud” Wieting Directors Thomas L. Hemmerle Richard O'Hara

Adam Miles Martin

AMDF.........................................................................31 (413) 268-7660 amdf@macular.org | www.macular.org Answering Service for Directors .....................................31 Kevin Czachor, (800) 868-9950 sales@myasd.com | www.myasd.com C& J Financial .............................................Back Cover Jamie Meredith, (800) 785-0003 jamiem@cjf.com | www.cjf.com/org

John Vincent Scalia

STAFF

Executive Director Mark Allen, CAE

Membership & Scott F. McClure Communications Director Staff Diane Durbin

Maureen Hayes Gael Murdoch Laine Phillips

The Foresight Companies ..........................................24 Catherine Belliveau, (602) 274-6464 catherine@f4sight.com | www.f4sight.com.com

Denise Rodriguez Michael Ryan

Jessica A. Smith

The Judith Roth Collection...............Inside Front Cover Judith Roth, (800) 413-4455 judith@jrcal.com | www.jrcal.com Mabrey Products..........................................................13 Douglas M. Tobey, (800) 942-3779 doug.tobey@mabreyproducts.com| www.mabreyproducts.com Meadow Hill................................................................28 Bob Vokum, (847) 381-9000 bob@meadowhill.com.com| www.meadowhill.com Messenger.....................................................................17 Bob Hoaglund, (800) 827-5151, ext. 243 bhoaglund@messengerllc.com| www.messengerstationary.com

Design & Layout Scott F. McClure Advertising is accepted at the discretion of the publisher. The advertisement of any product or service in The Independent® does not represent an endorsement of such product or service by OGR. Classified Advertising: line ads: $1.10 per word; display classified ads: $30 per col. inch. Call the communications department to reserve space or to request a rate card and mechanical specifications. OGR does not accept ads that discriminate on the basis of race, religion, national origin, age, gender, disability or any other federally protected class. Printer

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International Order of the Golden Rule 9101 Burnet Rd., Suite 120 Austin, Texas 78758 (800) 637-8030 Fax: (512) 334-5514 Email: info@ogr.org Website: www.ogr.org

Nicodeumus & Associates ..........................................21 Mike Nicodemus, (757) 503-3576 mikenicodemus@cox.net | www.cremationsuccess.com Pierce Chemical ..........................................................12 Lance Ray, (800) 527-6419 lray@wilbert.com| www.piercechemical.com

www.ogr.org | The Independent®

The Independent® |

Spring 2016 | Volume 19 | Issue 2

President’s Message

I Couldn't Have Done It Without You. by Bill Brock

erving as President of OGR has been rewarding and has lead to both personal growth and the expansion of my inner circle.

funeral director. As OGR President, I encourage you to rely on our staff as a support system for your business. If you look at the preceding page, you will see complete list of our incredible staff who remain in the shadows and do their best to make sure that The Order of the Golden Rule® is providing you with the support you need to access all the benefits of your membership.

Year after year, I make a conscious decision to renew my funeral home's Our frontline soldier is Diane Durbin. Many of you have OGR membership because of the value I get from my relaprobably had the pleasure of speaking with her as she takes tionships with other like-minded business owners and profes- your calls with a smile you can feel through the phone. Diane sionals. The business of the Independent Funeral Director is keeps in order all membership records, manages mailings, about conducting your business affairs in a way that is true to membership invoicing, member requests and much more. your moral compass and not based on the Gael Murdoch stands guard as our direction of an unseen entity driven only by accounting watchdog. She rules from the profit margins. We are about family. We are tower of product billing and receiving as well "Association about service. We are about community. We as OGR receivables. She works closely with are about getting it right, not just getting it Maureen Hayes. You know who she is, and leadership means done. if not, you need to get to know her. Maureen little without a is your Member Concierge and can handle If you are reading my column, chances are most if not all problems you can throw at dedicated staff to you too are a member of this great associaher. You need a product for your business? keep everything tion. One of my goals as the President of Maureen is going to find it for you. If you OGR was to bring our members together participate in OGR's Family Contact Proon course." to focus on family; our traditional family gram, you know Denise Rodriquez. From top and the families we serve on a daily basis. to bottom, she takes care of all program parYou see, without a driving force to guide us, ticipants. From surveys to tabulation, Denise we may find ourselves on a path without clear definition. We will get you the information you need. She is also a regular guide our families through the most difficult times. We help contributor to The Independent Magazine. them stand when they cannot. We lend them our strength to help them carry on. In turn, as the servant, we need a support These great people are the support to Mark Allen, CEO and system as well. Someone to help us stand tall and carry on. Executive Director; Jessica Smith, Assistant Executive DirecIt is my immediate family and my funeral service family that tor; our newest team member, Laine Phillips, Membership guides me day to day. Resources Director; Scott McClure, Membership & Communications Director; and Michael Ryan, Accounting Director. During many years of service on the OGR Board of Directors, Their work makes our funeral homes just a bit better for our I have watched the OGR staff acts as the 'guide' of the associa- families. tion. The Board represents the organization, but it is the staff that drives it every day. Their behind-the-scenes contribuThank you OGR staff for all that you do in the name of maktions help make this the great group it has become. ing Independent Funeral Homes Exceptional. Association leadership means little without a dedicated staff to keep everything on course. We are blessed to have such a staff. The OGR home office in Austin, Texas houses the efficient engine that keeps the association running smoothly. They are the family that serves us, the funeral home and the

Bill Brock, President The Independent® | Spring 2016

Family Contact MAILING SERVICE

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FAMILY CONTACT The Family Contact Program is the best way to secure the quality of your funeral home business using family feedback. We created the new mailing service option to make using the Family Contact Program as convenient as possible. Whether you don't have time to send out family feedback surveys or whether you prefer to have less work to worry about, let OGR do it for you and receive a full report every month. To learn more about the Family Contact Mailing Service Option or to inquire about the Family Contact Program, contact Denise Rodriguez at drodriguez@ogr.org or (800) 637-8030.

www.ogr.org | The Independent速

Why You Must Teach The Whys

(and know your own) by Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D.

f you are reading this article, you are probably aware of a significant truth:

chip away at them (or do not have any of them; i.e., have a direct disposition) and run the risk of missing the “sweet spot” of a meaningful funeral experience.

Many people are questioning the value of and the need for funerals!

As T.S. Elliott observed, “You can have an experience and miss the meaning.”

If there was ever a time to be reminded of WHY you do what you do related to creating meaningful funeral experiences for those you serve, it is RIGHT NOW!

Shouldn’t you just do what families want you to do?

Why are people questioning the need for funerals? Today’s families are not accustomed to making funeral arrangements and haven’t attended many services. They have fewer ties to tradition, and when a death occurs, tend to think in terms of a “celebration” or a “party.” And many confuse efficiency with effectiveness and try to move away from any feelings of grief by saying, “It will be easier if…” Often, not understanding the value of various elements of ceremony (visitations, music, readings, eulogy, symbols, procession, committal, reception) they choose to eliminate them. Unfortunately, not understanding the WHY, or the value of the elements, they

I was recently visiting with a funeral director who had arranged a direct cremation, with no service, for a family in his community. When I asked him what education he had provided them about the importance of a funeral, he said, “Well, shouldn’t I have just done what they asked?” My answer, both to him and to you, is an emphatic “NO!” As you well know, there is a vital need for those of you who recognize the value of meaningful funeral experiences to serve as educators about that value. As author Thomas Long recently observed, “As a society, North Americans are no longer sure what to do with their dead.” Yes, many people, through no fault of their own, have never learned that “when words are inadequate, have ceremony.”

The Independent® | Spring 2016

Yes, today’s families have created some challenges for those of you in the role of “gatekeeper of funeral ceremony.” More and more people are saying variations on the following:

“When I die, just get rid of me… no muss, no fuss. Maybe you can throw a party, but I sure don’t want a funeral!” “Dad said he didn’t want us to go to any trouble… so we are just going to do what he said.” “We just thought it would be easier, faster, and cheaper.”

That sounds reasonable, doesn’t it? But as I thought more about it later, I realized that helping families make decisions doesn’t necessarily result in a meaningful funeral experience. Instead, the funeral director’s true role is to help families make informed choices. You see, decisions are made with limited information. An example of a decision families are often asked to make is, “Would you like to have a visitation?” The answer to this question is yes or no, black or white. But if you are helping families make choices, you first educate them about, well, each of their choices. Instead of asking, “Would you like to have a visitation?,” you might say:

With so many people lacking an understanding of the WHY of meaningful funerals, I will be very direct— You cannot believe your role is to “just do what they want.” No, you cannot and will not change the mind of every family you serve, but if you don’t believe that your role is to EDUCATE families about the value of what you can provide, you should seriously question your future in funeral service. What's the difference between decisions and choices? When I talked to a funeral director recently, I learned a critical distinction between the words “decisions” and “choices.” Here’s a snippet of our conversation:

Me: “What do you think is the most important thing you do for families when you are trying to help them create a meaningful funeral experience?” Funeral Director: “The most important thing I do is help families make decisions.”

www.ogr.org | The Independent®

“The first part of the funeral experience is often the visitation. It’s a time for friends and family to gather before the funeral itself and gives people a chance to greet one another and talk before the more structured ceremony begins. If you think about it, it’s kind of a courtesy time—a reception, if you will, because your friends and family members, especially those you don’t see every day or who may be traveling from out of town, appreciate having some time to offer their condolences and kind of “get oriented” before plunging into the ceremony. If the body is present at the visitation, this time also really helps everyone acknowledge the reality of the death and gives them a chance to say hello on the pathway to goodbye. “We can make the visitation personalized by playing favorite music in the background and helping you put together a display of photos or a video or a memorabilia table as well.”

The more information a family is given about each of the elements of ceremony, the more their decisions become true choices. So, to reiterate, as you bring up each element of the funeral, you first educate about the purposes of that element, how that element fits into the whole funeral experience, and what some ways are to personalize that element. Then and only then is the family equipped to make an informed choice about whether or not to include that element in the unique funeral they are planning.

But first,

WHY are you in

Funeral

Service?

However, before you can create a COURSE OF ACTION to educate families and improve your funeral home’s service model, you must have a CAUSE OF ACTION! To be able to achieve a strategic CAUSE OF ACTION, your funeral home must place the focus on the reasons WHY we have funerals in the first place. In other words, you must first ask WHY you need to help teach the WHYs of funerals. As author and organizational consultant Simon Sinek has noted, “People don’t care about WHAT you do, they care about WHY you do it.”

difficult to maintain growth, loyalty, and the inspiration that helped drive the original success.” If your WHYs are fuzzy, your funeral home is almost certainly not realizing its potential. I understand that for an organization that may have been in business for decades, re-examining WHY you still exist today (not why you were founded long ago) can seem like a difficult or even pointless exercise. But I assure you, it is absolutely necessary in today’s funeral-avoiding culture. You see, if you are not doing so already, you must begin to educate the families you serve about why we have funerals and how each of the elements of the funeral serves an important purpose. But how can you genuinely educate them about the WHYs if you do not first ask yourself why? In all cases, returning to the original purpose, cause, belief, or intent—the WHY—is what has the potential to create TRANSFORMATIONS! Transformations are the effectual outcomes that guide those you serve to change some dimension of self.

Why does your funeral home exist? In other words, the Why do you personally choose to essence of helping those you serve work in funeral service? make a transformation is about helping Who are your customers today? them make decisions

The reality is that we can all achieve so much more if we start everything we do by asking WHY related to any product, service, or experience we provide. What you do (create meaningful funerals) simply serves as the proof of what you believe. Why does your funeral home exist? Why do you personally choose to work in funeral service? Who are your customers today? What are their expectations, needs, and wants? These are the essential questions you and your team must ask and answer before you can develop a plan to educate the families you serve and your community about the importance of funerals. As author and thought leader Simon Sinek astutely noted, “It is when a WHY gets fuzzy that it becomes much more

that are good for them.

So, if you genuinely believe (and I sure hope you do!) in the value of a meaningful funeral, you are often faced with attempting to help families you serve make choices that are good for them. • Alan D. Wolfelt, Ph.D., is a respected author, educator, and consultant to funeral service. He advocates for the value of meaningful funeral experiences in his death education workshops across North America each year. This article is excerpted from his workbook for funeral home staffs entitled “Educating the Families You Serve about the WHY of the Funeral.” He conducts a training program each June for funeral directors on this topic in Fort Collins, Colorado. For more information, call the Center for Loss at 970.226.6050, visit www.centerforloss.com, or e-mail Dr. Wolfelt directly at drwolfelt@centerforloss.com.

The Independent® | Spring 2016

The following firms have been selected to receive the 2016 Exemplary Service Award at OGR's Annual Conference & Supplier Showcase in Las Vegas, NV on April 28. They have each taken the time to share how the Family Contact Program has benefited their businesses.

Caldwell & Cowan Funeral Home, Covington, GA

suggestions about our service written in by the person completing the survey. We do receive some negative responses, but the positive outweighs the negative. The fact that our funeral directors and staff receive positive re-enforcement written directly by families they’ve served is encouraging to them, and gives them the incentive to meet and exceed the expectations of future families.

Judson Caldwell & Staff

Q: A:

Why do you believe it is important to receive family feedback? Having family feedback gives us an opportunity to hear directly from a family whether we’ve done our job well, met their expectations, and most importantly, helped them celebrate the life of their loved one in the way they wanted. Conversely, if we’ve failed to provide the service the family expected, feedback shows us areas which may need re-evaluation or reconsideration.

serving families what key ideas or principles Q: When do you try to keep in mind?

meeting with families, our primary focus is on A: When listening closely to what they’re saying. We often have

to “hear between the lines” in order to piece together what the family is trying to tell us. Paying close attention helps us understand how to organize a celebration of life that will be memorable for the family and unique to their loved one.

Q: A:

What are your favorite aspects of the Family Contact Program? One of the best things about the OGR survey form is that it’s simple to fill out. About half the surveys we receive back have only the “bubbles” filled in, with no comments. Others we receive have thoughts and

10 www.ogr.org | The Independent®

Q: A: Q: A:

How do you distribute the Family Contact survey to the families you serve? The OGR survey form is sent out one month after a death to each family we serve. We place a selfaddressed, stamped envelope in each survey, and we feel that makes a huge difference in the number of responses we receive. How has the family feedback you received from the program helped you deliver better service or improve your business? The family feedback forms give families the opportunity to share openly with us something they might not be willing to tell us face to face. The feedback has given us the ability to self-critique and re-evaluate areas where our service might need to be stronger, and to make improvements or adjustments where they’re needed. Positive feedback helps our funeral directors and staff feel more appreciated, and lets them know they’re doing their job well. A solid work environment and a content, appreciated staff is the foundation that allows us to pay close attention and give excellent service to our client families.

Strunk Funeral Home Vero Beach, FL Glenn Strunk Funeral Director/ Owner

Ahlgrim Funeral Home, Elmhurst, IL Scott Ahlgrim Owner/Director

do you believe it is important to Q: Why receive family feedback?

feedback provides valuable insight into the A: Family services we provide, and, most importantly, identi-

feedback helps us gauge how well we are A: Family doing our "job.â&#x20AC;? The positive comments and ratings

fies possible areas for improvement.

serving families what key ideas or Q: When principles do you try to keep in mind? mission is to support families during this very A: Our difficult time with compassion and understand-

ing while assisting them as they make decisions to recognize the life of their loved one with dignity and respect.

are your favorite aspects of Q: What the Family Contact Program?

Q: A: Q: A:

The Family Contact Program provides a direct family-based viewpoint of our services. This valuable insight streamlines the identification of possible areas for improvement and confirms the areas where we are providing excellence.

reinforce what we are doing well while the negative ones show us where there are areas for improvement and/or where corrections need to be made. I believe asking for feedback also shows families that we care about their satisfaction and value their input.

serving families what key ideas or principles Q: When do you try to keep in mind? key principle that we keep in mind is that we A: The are here to serve the families that call on us. It is

important that we help them arrange services and ceremonies that are meaningful to them and at the same time honor the life lived by their loved one and the wishes that individual may have had.

How do you distribute the Family Contact survey to the families you serve? The Family Contact Survey is included in the portfolio provided to each family at the conclusion of the funeral service or with the certified copies of the death certificate made available when no service is requested. How has the family feedback you received from the program helped you deliver better service or improve your business? The identification of areas for improvement enables us to continue to strive for excellence in the services we provide.

The IndependentÂŽ | Spring 2016 11

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It’s About The Final Touch 12 www.ogr.org | The Independent®

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Q: A: Q: A: Q: A:

What are your favorite aspects of the Family Contact Program? My favorite aspect of the Family Contact Program is being able to share with the staff that not only are they doing a good job, but they are also appreciated by the families we serve.

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How do you distribute the Family Contact survey to the families you serve? We mail the surveys out one to two months after the services or committal has been completed. We send it to every family we serve, regardless of whether it was a large and elaborate ceremony or a simple committal. How has the family feedback you received from the program helped you deliver better service or improve your business? At times we may not receive any immediate feedback from a family, but once they have had some time to reflect on everything and they receive the survey, we find out how truly grateful they are for the services we provided them. It helps to remind us that what we do is important and valued by the families we serve. That positive reinforcement is a powerful motivator that inspires us to continue serving our community. •

Meet Mabrey, your best resource for 100% built-inAmerica memorial urns. Our California craftspeople skillfully create solid hardwood urns featuring personal photos, three-dimensional inlays, line art and custom laser engraving. Perhaps most importantly, funeral directors call our custom services and customer service unmatched. We’re proud to deliver old-fashioned quality and honest values, we’re honored to create unique, personalized memorials for your families.

The Family Contact Program Every member who participates in the Family Contact Program stays in-tune with the needs of the families that they serve, receives great tools for improving their business and motivation for the work that they do. With member feedback, OGR implemented a new system with upgraded features this past year to guide participants further in providing and maintaining quality service. Interested in learning more? Be on the lookout for registration information to our FREE Family Contact webinar on May, 17th 2016, 3 pm CST. Want to know more now? Contact Publications & Family Contact Coordinator Denise Rodriguez at drodriguez@ogr.org or (800) 637-8030 and ask for a sample packet.

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The Independent® | Spring 2016 13

It's Time To Take a Closer Look At Your Answering Service 6 Questions to Consider When Choosing an Answering Service By Jessica Fowler

ow do we assess the value of something we cannot hold or touch? This is a question funeral professionals face head on, every day, as directors offer something to families in need that cannot be weighed or measured. Whether providing closure to a devastated widow or a moment of clarity to a confused and grieving child, funeral professionals provide a service to others that is often indefinable. There is no simple way to put to scale the comfort and solace that directors give every day. When it comes to selecting or evaluating your answering service, there are many qualities that are intangible yet extremely valuable—the first impression families have of your funeral home, the reputation your firm’s employees work hard to uphold, the trust of a family you have fostered for generations. These factors can often be determined by a single phone call. Families are likely to form an opinion about your brand based on that initial conversation. Careful thought and thorough research is critical when selecting the best organization to represent your business and assist your at-need callers.

14 www.ogr.org | The Independent®

Here are 6 questions to consider when choosing an answering service:

What percentage of calls handled by the answering service are funeral home calls?

As a funeral director, you know firsthand how upset and overwhelmed callers may be when contacting you. When you’re dealing with delicate emotions, sensitivity and empathy must always be conveyed. If an answering service operator is switching gears between calls for funeral homes, doctors and plumbers, the likelihood of mishandled call increases dramatically. Determine how much funeral experience the staff has and what percentage of calls answered on a daily basis are for funeral homes. Can the answering service guarantee all employees answering your line will have specialized funeral training? Some answering services will go to great lengths to give the impression they answer solely for funeral homes. These companies claim to be funeral specific, but in reality they

answer for all types of businesses. They use more than one business name, website and phone number to create an illusion of funeral exclusivity. However, a quick Google search of the owner’s name or company address reveals that a larger, generic answering service actually owns the company. Don’t be fooled by this artful deception. When it comes to protecting your calls and your brand, there is no substitute for experience and dependability.

How transparent is the operation?

To evaluate an answering service properly, you must take an active role in monitoring how calls are handled. With today’s technology, there is no reason why a recording of all your calls should not be available. An answering service that invests in its training and staff will encourage customers to listen to their messages and offer feedback. Unfortunately, some companies will not disclose call recordings to conceal shortcomings. Find out how much control and oversight you will have before forwarding your lines to any answering service. In addition to having access to recordings of every call, you should be able to determine to whom and when the call was delivered. Some companies offer a “dispatch log” showing everyone who was notified or reached for a critical call. This will help you evaluate the answering service’s responsiveness and accuracy. When families are distraught, a few minutes can feel like a lifetime. Your answering service should disclose the number of times the phone rang before the line was answered. This knowledge will give you peace of mind that your callers are not routinely put on hold for long periods of time. Answering services that don’t disclose these details leave funeral directors in the dark with no way of knowing how their callers are treated.

Does the answering service provide tools to help you grow?

It is very common for an at-need, preneed or pricing call to occur after hours. It is critical to ensure that your answering service understands the value of these calls and has solutions in place to protect new business opportunities. In addition to recognizing the significance of these calls, your answering service should also offer tools that can improve response time and enhance the level of service to your families. Here are a few questions to consider

when evaluating if an answering service can deliver a competitive edge for your funeral home.

Can the service connect price shoppers directly to you? Rather than allowing price shoppers to hang up and call another funeral home, some answering services offer an option to connect these sensitive calls to the on-call director. Can the service alert you the moment a death is first reported? The moment your service recognizes someone has passed, you should receive an alert so that you can politely excuse yourself from any situation and find an appropriate place to handle the new first call. Does the service allow you to connect into a first call in progress? When a death is reported, your service should provide an option that enables you to join in on the first call in progress just as if you are picking up a second line at the funeral home. Does the service offer a tool that lets you display the funeral home’s office number as your outgoing Caller ID? Rather than giving out your cell phone number every time you return a call, a new answering service solution now exists that allows you to display the funeral home’s office line as your outgoing Caller ID. Can the service create a custom Web Chat system for your website? When it comes to inquiring about funeral options and prices, many people may not feel comfortable picking up the phone to ask questions. Some answering services can now customize a Web Chat solution for your funeral home’s website. Can the answering service work with your transport company? Today, many funeral homes rely on a Transport Company when a death occurs after hours. Find out if the answering service can create specific instructions and contact procedures to help coordinate removals.

The Independent® | Spring 2016 15

Is the answering service convenient to use?

Funeral professionals are constantly on the go meeting with families, conducting services, handling removals and accomplishing other important tasks. With the advent of cellular technology, Wi-Fi, mobile apps and email, directors have found freedom by taking their businesses on the go. When you’re on call, your answering service should be able to provide several options that allow you to track and monitor your telephone activity. Receiving messages via text, email or push notification frees you from being interrupted by a telephone call when you’re on a service, with a family or driving. Most answering services can offer technology that connects the entire staff to a central communication portal either through a smartphone app or mobile website. You should also have the ability to share messages and phone recordings to easily relay vital information to your staff. Before choosing an answering service, find out what tools and solutions they have developed to help when you’re on-call. Request a video tutorial of their technology to understand what features are available and to evaluate the accessibility of their programs.

How does the answering service bill?

With many funeral homes feeling the impact of a cautious economic climate, the need to establish defined payment schedules with vendors has become increasingly important. Be sure to inquire about the answering service’s billing structure and how to minimize costs. Answering services generally bill per minute or per phone call and offer tiered call plans based on call volume. You should have access to a detailed list of every billable call. Listen to your calls to confirm that the amount of time you are billed matches the actual length of each call. Keep in mind there may be some extra Operator

16 www.ogr.org | The Independent®

time that is included, but that certainly should not double the amount you are billed. If the service assesses any fees such as an extra charge for taking calls on a holiday, this information should be disclosed to you as well. Monitoring your usage and invoices will guard against paying more than you should. Most answering services will offer a free trial period in order to recommend a billing plan based on your call volume. Your answering service should give you the flexibility to change this anytime and proactively reach out if your plan becomes too high in the future. Answering services will generally charge for both incoming calls and outgoing dispatches. However, some companies allow customers to greatly reduce their outgoing calls by using technology. By responding to urgent messages via text, email, website link or push notification, directors can reduce their billable calls while also eliminating unnecessary telephone distractions.

Does the service require a term contract?

The funeral business is inherently unpredictable and your needs may change unexpectedly. Be wary of term contracts requiring you to use an answering service exclusively for any length of time. A rigid contractual agreement can cause major headaches down the road if at any point you become dissatisfied with the service provided. Look for an answering service that offers greater flexibility and freedom to keep your options open in the future. The quality of the company’s performance should be enough to retain your business. • Jessica Fowler is a freelance writer and Public Relations Specialist at ASD – Answering Service for Directors, the leading funeral home exclusive answering service. Jessica has been published in funeral trade magazines and has written articles on a variety of subjects including communication, business planning and funeral trends. She can be reached at 800-868-9950 or jess.fowler@myasd.com.

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The Independent® | Spring 2016 17

Life the

Clay Clark is an entertainer, educator, and consultant for America’s leading companies and the founder of Thrive15.com, the world’s premier online education platform that helps entrepreneurs, aspiring entrepreneurs, and “in-trepreneurs” (entrepreneurial-minded people who work within an organization) learn how to start or grow a successful business.

You Want

By Oklahoma’s former U.S. Small Business Administration of the Year and the founder of Thrive15.com, Clay Clark

he idea of achieving success is my magnificent obsession and something that I am quite certain we can all achieve if we truly want to. Throughout my career as a business consultant, entrepreneur and educator, I have literally invested thousands and thousands of hours into the study of successful people and what has allowed them to achieve such massive levels of success while others remain stuck and unable to achieve. My research has revealed that successful people all share six common denominators that we can learn and apply to our own lives. Successful people are committed to:

• Developing the Growth Mindset • Executing Daily Success Habits • Systematically Developing Their Network

• Installing Proven Time Management • •

Systems Going the Extra Mile Never Feeling Bad Saying No

To quote the famous Grammy-winning songwriter and a guy I went to college with, Ryan Tedder of OneRepublic,

“When you’re around enormously successful people, you realize their success isn’t an accident, it’s about work.” 18 www.ogr.org | The Independent®

My friend, successful people are all very intentional about designing the lives they want as opposed to accepting the circumstances they were given or currently have. Stanford’s Carol S. Dweck, Ph.D. calls this the “growth mindset.” She has devoted a large portion of her career into researching what allows some people to achieve and what causes some people to become stagnant in their careers. During the course of her career, she has determined that whether you have a “growth mindset” or the “fixed mindset” plays a major role in determining whether or not you will achieve success. In fact she once wrote in a piece for Education Week entitled, Carol Dweck Revisits the Growth Mindset, “We found that students’ mindsets—how they perceive their abilities—played a key role in their motivation and achievement, and we found that if we changed students’ mindsets, we could boost their achievement. More precisely,

Develop the Growth Mindset

students who believed their intelligence could be developed (a growth mindset) outperformed those who believed their intelligence was fixed (a fixed mindset). And when students learned through a structured program that they could “grow their brains” and increase their intellectual abilities, they did better.” As funeral directors, you have so many daily tasks and obligations that you could easily fall into the reactive rut of routine if you are not intentional about scheduling a specific time each day for on-going education and personal development. Do you have any time set aside for “growing your mindset”?

We live in a world where everyone is very busy. Many of us are greeted each morning with a tsunami of emails, texts and social media alerts flooding our inboxes. Most people have become so busy that they are no longer productive. So how are successful people able to win this daily battle to stay productive and not just stay frantically busy? The most successful people on the planet have developed daily success habits. They have installed daily schedules and routines into their lives that have created habitual and perpetual success. The bestselling leadership and success author John Maxwell has said, “The secret to success is determined by

Execute Daily Success Habits

We all need to take a timeout and mentally marinate on our daily agendas and calendars. If we were to duplicate today’s activities found in our calendar, would this produce success over a lifetime? If not, why are we doing it? We must begin to schedule success into our daily schedules.

As funeral directors, I understand that you are busy and that you probably don’t want to run around town telling people that “business is booming at the funeral home.” When we begin to design this daily schedule of success, it’s important that we intentionally block out time to invest in and develop the win-win relationships we all need to help us discover and unlock the vast world of opportunity. More often than not, as business owners, having the personal connection with the banker determines whether or not we get the financing we need. Having grown up in a world where millionaires were not in my social circle and where success was never present, I grew determined to read many books on the subject of networking effectively. One of my favorite authors on this subject is Porter Gale, the former Vice President of Marketing for Virgin America who wrote the book, Your Network Is Your Net Worth. In this book Porter states, “Your social capital, or your

Systematically Develop Your Network

ability to build a network of authentic personal and professional relationships, not your financial capital, is the most important asset in your portfolio.” The reality is this: if you and I don’t invest the time needed to expand our network of solid win-win business relationships, we aren’t going to know the people that we need to know to truly unlock our potential. Many times having a friend in the world of commercial real estate means the difference between hearing about that next perfect location for your business expansion or not. This year a funeral director and one of the subscribers to our online education platform shared that he actually learned that the owner of two funeral homes in his area was looking to retire as a result of a person he spoke with while attending a fundraising event. He said that this information allowed him to approach the owner about buying his businesses and ultimately making the deal. Make sure that in your world of busyness you don’t forget to schedule time to network with the right people. If you are in the room, many times you will be included in the deal.

your daily agenda.”

The Independent® | Spring 2016 19

Successful people are all excellent time managers. Perhaps the most successful time manager I’ve ever seen is the entrepreneur trapped inside an optometrist’s body by the name of Doctor Robert Zoellner. His mentorship has had a profound impact on my life to the point that I asked him to become the CEO of the online business school I founded, Thrive15.com. Watching him manage time is like watching Magic Johnson pass a basketball or Whitney Houston when she sang the Star Spangled Banner during the Super Bowl…it’s a thing of beauty. We all only have 24 hours a day, yet Doctor Zoellner seems to be able to get 400% more done every day than the typical person. Successful people have developed proven systems that allow them to get much more done that the typical person. I highly recommend that you invest the time needed to read, Time Management Magic by Lee Cockerell. Lee was the former Executive Vice President of Walt Disney World Resorts and a man who once managed 40,000 cast members. To quote Lee, “If you don’t spend time

Install Proven Time Management Systems

to plan the life you want, you will spend a lot of time living the life you don’t want.”

We’ve all heard the advice of going the extra mile, but I have noticed that in the world of business very few people are willing to do this. Thus, when you do get into the habit of always attempting to under promise and over-deliver you will set into motion the universal Law of Reciprocity. Essentially it works like this: when someone exceeds your expectations, you most likely feel a deep down desire to pay the person back or to at least thank him/her properly. When you truly commit to habitually exceeding the expectations of everyone that you come in contact with, you create this incredible situation where everyone you know is looking to do a favor for you. Pretty soon people begin to describe you as lucky or as having the “Midas Touch.” The late great self-help author Napoleon Hill describes it this way, “Render more and better

Go the Extra Mile

service than you are paid for, and sooner or later you will receive compound interest from your investment. It is inevitable that every seed of useful 20 www.ogr.org | The Independent®

service you sow will sprout and reward you with an abundant harvest.”

As a funeral director, you are helping families during their biggest time of need, which creates a massive opportunity to serve. When you take the time to go the extra mile and to really focus on exceeding the expectations of your customers as they grieve the loss of a loved one, you will be amazed at the level of loyalty this will foster amongst the family you are assisting.

If you truly desire to become successful, you must also unfortunately learn to say no. As a father of 5 kids, a partner in 9 businesses, the raiser of 38 free-range chickens and a man who is pigheaded about honoring my marriage vows, I have had to learn to say no and to say no often. As an ambitious person who grew up in a world where we were very financially limited, I still have a hard time saying no. Every week I am presented with an opportunity to go speak somewhere to an incredible group of people like OGR and endless opportunities to consult with companies looking to grow. However, I cannot say yes to everything or I won’t have any time left for me. My friend, you must learn to say no if you want to achieve massive success. The late great Steve Jobs said it best when he said, “People think focus means saying yes to the

Never Feel Bad Saying No

thing you've got to focus on. But that's not what it means at all. It means saying no to the hundred other good ideas that there are. You have to pick carefully. I'm actually as proud of the things we haven't done as the things I have done. Innovation is saying no to 1,000 things.”

I am 100% confident that this can truly be your year to thrive and experience personal success like never before. However, in order to succeed you must learn to adapt and implement these principles in your lives or you will be merely just wishing to achieve success and hoping for a better life. As a man who loves quotes from people who are more successful than I am, I will leave you with this last one from the famous inventor and entrepreneur, Thomas Edison, “Vision without execution is hallucination.” •

The Independent速 | Spring 2016 21

Young Professionals Austin Success!

Left to Right: Jessica Olson, Bradley Funeral Home; Ayla Pequeño & Mike Ramos, Sunset Funeral Home; Justin Olson.

Brian & Erica Fisher, Rader of Rader Funeral Home

Preston & Erika Rader of Rader Funeral Home

Robert & Audrey O’Byrne of Mann-Slonaker Funeral Home

22 www.ogr.org | The Independent®

OGR’s first ever Young Professionals Event in Austin, TX this past February, was attended by a generous mix of funeral directors under 40 years of age from around North America. The two day event was a whirlwind education, sight-seeing, and eating like a local. The most important part of OGR's event was that YP funeral service professionals had the chance to connect with each other and share their challenges and victories.

Left to Right: Todd Green, George Irvin Green Funeral Home; Shayna Rauch, Flinn Funeral Services; Jessica Goglin, Kuhler Funeral Home; and Scott Green, George Irvin Green Funeral Home

Left to Right: Tom Weaver, Weaver Funeral Home; Peter Urban, Urban Funeral Home

Kelsey Williams & Will Beyers, Beyers Funeral Home

Clif & Jennifer Mullis, Wages & Sons Funeral Home

Chase & Rhonda Lewis, Lewis Funeral Home

OGR's 2017 Young Professionals Event will be in Austin, TX. Contact Jessica Smith at jsmith@ogr.org for more information.

The Independent速 | Spring 2016 23

“We are very pleased with the accounting services provided by Foresight. Our daily workload has been significantly lightened and the immediate access to our financial picture is a great benefit. We no longer wait for month end reports. Foresight’s accounting and consulting services gives us a great advantage in planning for the Joe, Lori and Tyler Pray future of our business.” Pray Funeral Home

Foresight Companies, LLC THE FORESIGHT COMPANIES, LLC MERGERS & ACQUISITIONS · VALUATIONS · MANAGEMENT · ACCOUNTING · CUSTOMER SURVEYS · FINANCING

... BECAUSE EVERY BUSINESS NEEDS AN EDGE Call (800) 426-0165 or visit www. f4sight .com Visit us in Las Vegas at the OGR 57th Annual Conference & Supplier Showcase 24 www.ogr.org | The Independent® and don't miss Dan Isard's closing session on Saturday, April 30th.

YOUNG PROFESSIONALS by Denise Rodriguez, OGR Publications & Family Contact Coordinator

JESSICA GOGLIN Get to know your fellow member, Jessica Goglin, a licensed funeral director and embalmer of Kuhler Funeral Home in Huron, SD. She has worked in the funeral industry for 3 years with her mentor, George Kuhler. She shares her thoughts and experiences as a funeral professional, mother of 3, and recent OGR YP event attendee.

I HAVE NOTICED I have noticed a demand for more customized service and merchandise created by the use of technology. Customized merchandise, stationary, and remembrance items are replacing basic merchandise. Technology has allowed us to better serve our families. As a result, staff members need to become even more efficient and knowledgeable with technology.

I MADE A DIFFERENCE The most rewarding part of my occupation is being able to work with a great team of professionals who are focused on caring for others and seeing the results of our dedication reflected in the appreciation that we receive from the families that we serve.

I AM INSPIRED... I am inspired by funeral directors & embalmers who mentor and encourage young professionals. I am fortunate to work alongside my mentor who has 40 plus years of experience. It takes a lot of time and patience on his part, but he continues to share his experience and knowledge about the industry.

Jessica Goglin

I ATTENDED THE OGR YP EVENT The most valuable part of my experience was the relationships that were created with other attendees. Rarely am I able to spend time with a large group of young funeral directors that understand the profession and the struggles of juggling our careers, families, and managing our health. At the Solving Your Challenges Workshop, it was beneficial to share our challenges and to hear how others have solved or might have solved those same obstacles.

QUICK Q's 3 FUTURE GOALS

1. To continue learning and establishing the skills needed for this profession to better serve families. 2. To share that knowledge with others in the future. 3. To one day own and operate a firm that adheres to the Golden Rule.

FAVE PHONE APPS Apple Music

MANTRA / ADVICE

"To treat every family like my own family."

SOMETHING "GOLDEN"

When I receive an unexpected message from an old friend or a family I served.

The Independent速 | Spring 2016 25

Member Spotlight

A Building of History, A Family of Service By Denise Rodriquez OGR Publications & Family Contact Coordinator eaver-Brown Funeral Service in Marion, VA contains an impressive amount of history inside its walls which have gone through several transitions over the years. In 1844, it started off as a sawmill and cabinet shop which then expanded to a furniture store and opera house until finally, in 1964, it became Seaver-Brown Funeral Service.

says Malcolm. He often hires people who are active in the community. Many of the people on staff are church leaders, county commissioners and volunteers. “I have never worked at another business where you can come in at 8:30 a.m. and see staff members who aren’t scheduled to work that day—people who just come by to talk to everyone and see if they need any help,” says Malcolm.

The funeral home is currently owned and managed by Malcolm Brown IV, who took over after his father Malcolm Brown III passed away in 2015. “I took over management during his illness and have stepped into very large shoes after his death” says Malcolm. Malcolm Brown III was a well-known OGR member and supporter whose dedication to funeral service has left a lasting mark on his son. “My father constantly sought to better the funeral home and himself as a funeral service provider. He has left us with the mission to continue to improve, adapt, and change in order to be the best funeral home that we can be,” he says.

Seaver-Brown’s approach to funeral service is motivated by the opportunity to help others. Malcolm elaborates, “Many people face death only a few times over the course of their lives and it can be overwhelming. As funeral service providers, our purpose is to guide families through this strange experience and to advise them.”

A Great Staff is Key

“What makes Seaver-Brown Funeral Service great is our staff. Though we are not all related by blood, our company is a family,”

26 www.ogr.org | The Independent®

Death is Personal

Because death is a highly personal experience, Malcolm believes it is important for Seaver-Brown Funeral Home to be able to tailor their services to each individual they remember. He says, “From memorial videos, to slideshows, to permanent memorials--a more personalized memorial will serve as the spark to bring survivors together to remember the things that make their loved one unique.”

Member Spotlight

A trend that Seaver-Brown Funeral Service has employed with great success is the use of electronic media. “We now have the capability to exhibit thousands of pictures using slideshows on high definition televisions throughout the funeral home. We have used a large screen TV as a display method for a memorial video or pictures during the service for many years and have just completed the installation of a new, permanently installed, television in our chapel,” says Malcolm.

Creative Funeral Service Endeavors Seaver-Brown Funeral Service is em-

barking on several creative goals for their funeral home. One of their endeavors includes training a therapy dog named Luna to serve at the funeral home. Luna is finally getting to the age where she can begin her classes and will start working at Seaver-Brown soon. This spring they will also sponsor a benefit concert featuring the Tams, which will raise money to benefit St. Jude’s Hospital. “We are hoping this event will bring the community together for a fun evening while supporting an important charitable organization that helps many children,” says Malcolm. Something even more unique is that they have recently partnered with the Smyth County Genealogical Society to make an electronic database of some of their oldest funeral service records (1883-1903) available online. Malcolm comments, “We hope this will benefit the local community and those who trace their lineage to our county to locate genealogical records and information about their family members.”

Malcolm Brown, IV & Malcolm Brown, Jr.

From a sawmill and cabinet shop to a furniture store and opera house and finally to a funeral home, Seaver-Brown Funeral Service originated out of several different business models that kept changing in order to serve the needs of the community. This legacy of adaptation and communityfirst set forth by generations of his family is something that Malcolm Brown IV plans to continue in regards to funeral service stating, “We will continue to innovate and to keep up with the current trends and best practices of the industry, and we look forward to working with OGR and its members to continue to provide our families with the best and most personalized services.” •

Seaver-Brown’s approach to funeral service is motivated by the opportunity to help others.

Seaver-Brown Funeral Service & Crematory, Marion, VA

The Independent® | Spring 2016 27

Your first call when you need a helping hand. Do you feel there are simply not enough hours in the day to get everything done? Well, help has arrived! Ask the OGR Concierge. Whether you need assistance finding a unique product, gathering information for price comparisons or coming up with the right service provider, simply ask the OGR Concierge. With member concierge services we can offer you problem-solving and time-saving solutions. Access this Exclusive Member service by calling Maureen Hayes at (800) 637-8030. â&#x20AC;&#x153;With over 20 years of experience working directly with members and industry suppliers, I am always here and happy to help." Maureen Hayes, Member Concierge

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All pieces available with red, blue, green, yellow and purple resins. Colors will vary dependent upon the unique characteristics of the remains.

Our simple, patent-pending process makes the collection of remains easy for your staff, adding value to your business. Contact us to request a pack of collection kits. If you have further questions call 877.848.6243 or email us at info@meadowhillco.com.

Thank You Sponsors

The Independent速 | Spring 2016 29

Your Membership

POST CONFERENCE

Post-Conference Webinars are an encore of OGR Annual Conference presentations. All presentations below are free of charge. Want CE credit? Each session is only $50 per person Tuesday, May 10 – 1:00 PM EDT

Thursday, May 12 – 1:00 PM EDT

Eric Castiglia’s Fall Forum presentation on data security was so popular, OGR asked him to present additional practical information at the Annual Conference & Supplier Showcase. If you missed his presentation in Vegas, this webinar will catch you up. Castiglia will show you policies that make your firm more secure, keep your customer’s information safe and minimize your funeral home legal liability.

You’ve probably heard of Have the Talk of a Lifetime®, but do you know how it can increase your revenue? Learn how to implement the program in ways that can bring more preneed to your funeral home. Quinn will share real-life examples of how funeral homes have successfully used program tools to increase their community visibility.

Unhackable: Procedures for Protecting You and Your Client Families’ Info Eric Castiglia, Memorial Payment Solutions

How Have the Talk of a Lifetime Will Increase ROI: A Case Study Quinn Eagan, Funeral Pre-Need Program

Wednesday, May 11 – 1:00 PM EDT How Body Presentation Can Make or Break the Casket Matt Smith, Mor-bid.com With cremation on the rise, funeral directors experience more pressure than ever to flawlessly present the body when there’s a viewing. Matt will share his Annual Conference presentation on the techniques needed to make your embalming and body presentation the best in town and create a more comfortable and meaningful experience for the family.

New

The Independent速 | Spring 2016 31

Member News

Laman Wins Award Bob Laman, CEO of Chiles-Laman Funeral & Cremation Services in Lima, OH was awarded with a 2016 Jefferson Award for Public Service. Since 1980, Laman has been a member of the Lima Noon Optimist Club, whose mission is to serve the youth in the community. Through the service organization, Laman has been involved with Safety City, the home show, fishing derby, breakfast with Santa, and an annual trick-or-treating event that he chairs. “The community has always been very good to me, so I just think that giving back is so important,” Laman said. “The world can be a tough place, so the more we can help each other out, the better it is for all of us.”

Montgomery Inducted

Smith Sponsors R. Hayden Smith Funeral Home, Hampton, VA, sponsored Nancy Weil of the The Laugh Academy at the 34th Annual Community Forum on Aging presented by Peninsula Agency On Aging and CNU LifeLong Learning Society. They joined hundreds of Seniors, Caregivers and Professionals at the Christopher Newport University Freeman Center for a day of informational workshops.

Eagan Accepts Award Preneed Funeral Program (PFP) received top honors for their production of over $104 million in preneed contracts for the 2015 year and was honored at the annual Homesteaders Leaders Conference given by Homesteaders Life Company. Held March 2-6 in Panama City, the conference recognized top achievers in preneed sales for the previous year. PFP received the prestigious Daniel M. Voecks Sales Achievement Award for Volume, which recognizes the marketing organization with the highest sales volume in 2015.

Dian and Gerry Montgomery, co-owners of Montgomery & Steward Funeral Directors in Pueblo, Colo., were recently inducted into the Pueblo Community College Hall of Fame. The Montgomerys have devoted much of their time and financial support to Pueblo’s arts organizations and several civic groups. The couple’s love of animals led to their sponsorship of pet memorial services that are conducted by local clergy.

32 www.ogr.org | The Independent®

Quinn Eagan, President and Founder of PFP, accepted the award. “We had a great year this year,” Eagan said. “70% of the top 10 [Homesteaders] producers came out of PFP, not only this year, but last year, so I know we are doing something right.” Eagan cited what he said were the two secrets to PFP’s sales success: creating positive habits when speaking with families and implementing effective marketing systems.

Member News

Foundation Donations Clifford A. and Anita M. Greene made a generous donation in the amount of $1,000.00 to the OGR Foundation supporting the Awards of Excellence program. Livingston Butler and Volland made a generous donation in the amount of $2,500.00 to the OGR Foundation. Tom Hemmerle, Barnett-Strother Funeral Home, LLC made a $100 donation in the name of John A. Luftus.

Funeral Professional Wanted Vermont Funeral Director, Embalmer or Intern Central Vermont family owned and operated funeral home seeking a licensed funeral professional skilled in arranging and directing, with embalming license preferred. Must be experienced with computers, data entry, and pre-need arrangements. Also would consider a mortuary school graduate to serve an apprenticeship with long-term goals. Competitive salary and benefits based on experience. Mail resume to: Hooker & Whitcomb Funeral Home, PO Box 309, East Barre, VT 05649 Or Fax to: (802)-479-0250 Or E-mail to: whitcombsinvt@charter.net

2016-2018 BOARD Election Results

Thomas L. Hemmerle Owner, Barnett-Strother Funeral Home, Madisonville, Kentucky

John Vincent Scalia Owner, John Vincent Scalia Home for Funerals, Staten Island, New York

Thomas L. Hemmerle, was re-elected to a second two- year term on the OGR board and continues to bring his wealth of funeral service experience. Tom is the owner of Barnett-Strother Funeral Home in Madisonville, KY and has been a licenced funeral director for over 20 years. He is married to Natalie and has three sons, Joey, Matthew and Nick.

John Vincent Scalia, was re-elected to a second two-year term on the board. John offers decades of marketing and business experience. He is the founder of John Vincent Scalia Home for Funerals in Staten Island, NY. He is a licensed funeral director in the states of NY, NJ, and PA and is a graduate of the American Academy of Funeral Services, the Dodge Institute of Mortuary Science, and the New York School of Insurance. John is married to Cecilia and has two children, Cecilia and John, Jr. The Independent速 | Spring 2016 33

Aftercare Packets

Help your families on “The Road to Recovery” to d a o R The ry e v o c e R

d e n g i s e D y - Newl

Families rely heavily on your support before and during a service. Updated with new content and a fresh design, this aftercare packet provides your families with support after a service. The healing process can be a long and cumbersome journey, without the help of a good aftercare program.

The Road to Recovery packets and booklets are ideal to help your families through certain situations. Packet and booklets are imprinted to include your funeral home’s logo and contact information. Road to Recovery Takes Courage letterhead and business cards also available.

t n e t n o C d - Update s t e l k o o B f - 3 Grie

Call your Member Concierge, Maureen Hays to order, (800) 637-8030 34 www.ogr.org | The Independent®

In Memoriam

Remembering

Family & Friends John A. Loftus John A. Loftus, age 86 of Maple Glen PA, died Saturday, March 26, 2016 surrounded by his family. Born in Philadelphia, PA, he was the son of the late Peter D. and Bridget Josephine (nee Carrabine) Loftus. Mr. Loftus was a graduate of North Catholic High School in 1947, Villanova University with a Bachelor Degree in Electrical Engineering in 1952, and a Masters in Electrical Engineering from the University of Pennsylvania in 1957. He served in the US Navy during the Korean War aboard the destroyers USS Dortch (DD-670) and the USS Caperton (DD-650). He worked for G.E. Aerospace in Valley Forge for 31 years prior to his retirement in 1993. Early in his career Mr. Loftus managed studies on the economic analysis of long-life satellite missions, including communications, navigation, and surveillance spacecraft for the Air Force, National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, Defense Communication Agency, among others. He went on to become program manager on several military satellite programs. Mr. Loftus was also a key engineering leader for over 13 years on the Defense Communication Satellite System that provided worldwide military communications for commanders and soldiers in the field for three decades. John was most often referred to as Poppop by his family. He had a witty sense of humor and enjoyed a life long photography hobby. He documented his life and family with thousands of photos and displayed them proudly. He also enjoyed researching his genealogy

and creating family trees. He was an avid reader and loved a good meal. Mr. Loftus was preceded in death by his wife Dolores A. (nee Dwyer) Loftus in 2009. He is the devoted father of Dolores A. (Skip) Urban of Ambler; John A. (Lynn) Loftus, Jr. of Springhouse; William P. (Veena) Loftus of Haverford; Peter F. (Yvette) Loftus of Montgomeryville; Theresa A. (Michael) Zataveski of Quakertown; and Daniel A. (Julie) Loftus of Cherry Hill, NJ. He is the loving Grandfather of Jacalyn Jammaers, Peter Urban, Jr.; Andrew Urban; Kaitlyn Loftus; Kelly Loftus; Johnny Loftus; Michael Loftus; Isaac Loftus; Devi Loftus; Julisa Loftus; Peter Angelo Loftus; Christopher Loftus; Theresa Hawley; Christine Norman; Victoria Zataveski; Owen Loftus and Trevor Loftus and the Great Grandfather of Ryan Hawley.

Ernest Allison Welch, Jr. Ernest Allison Welch, Jr., 90, of Big Spring, Texas went home to be with his Heavenly Father, March 10, 2016. He was born September 25, 1925 in Seymour, Texas, the first child of Ernest Welch, Sr. and Eva Dodd Welch. He married Mary Lynn Brock June 2, 1946 in Seymour, Texas. She preceded him in death on October 31, 2014. Ernest was raised on a farm in Baylor County, Texas along with six brothers and sisters. He served in the United States Army Air Corps during World War II, flying B-25 Bomber planes. During his time in the Army he attended several colleges.

passion for helping families and serving those who were grieving after the loss of a loved one. The owner of the funeral home saw potential in his dedication and heart for service, and encouraged him to pursue a career in funeral service. In 1947, Ernest graduated from the Dallas Institute of Mortuary Science and became a licensed funeral director and embalmer in 1950. Ernest moved to Big Spring in 1953 and worked at River Funeral Home. Within a few years, the opportunity for him to become a partner in the business arose, and the funeral home’s name was changed to River-Welch Funeral Home. Mr. Coy Nalley and Mr. J.C. Pickle asked Ernest to work with them as well, noting his character and the quality of his work. When Mr. Nalley and Mr. Pickle were ready to retire, they offered to sell the funeral home to Ernest. He purchased the funeral home and consolidated the firm to become NalleyPickle & Welch Funeral Home. Ernest’s wife, Mary Lynn Welch, was an integral part of the operation and helped him build the business. Their children, Lynda, Phillip, Pamela, and Tommy were raised in Big Spring. Today, the funeral home operates locations in Big Spring, Midland, and Stanton and a perpetual care cemetery in Big Spring called Trinity Memorial Park. His son,Tommy and his granddaughter, Kasi, operate the funeral homes and cemetery, continuing the family legacy. Online condolences may be made at: www.npwelch.com

After returning home from his time in the service, Ernest began working for a local funeral home and developed a The Independent® | Spring 2016 35

Exemplary Service

A B &

bove eyond

Every Thursday we feature members who have gone Above & Beyond.

the Golden Rule

facebook.com/goldenrulefh

These members have been cited for providing exemplary service, going beyond expected service levels, and are eligible for the Winners Circle Exemplary Service Awards. Winners are honored at OGR's Annual Conference & Supplier Showcase. Comments are submitted by families responding to Family Contact Surveys. Stewart Family Funeral Home | Tyler, TX I could not have asked for a kinder, more respectful group of people. Words cannot express how grateful I am for them. It was a very difficult time for me, but the staff was so helpful with the planning. I felt I could contact them at any time with any questions. I was encouraged to call with any questions. I was contacted after the service and that was very comforting to me. The chapel was beautiful. The flowers were setup perfectly. The slideshow and music worked perfectly. I couldn’t have been more pleased.

Shinn Funeral Home | Russellville, AR We felt like we were treated as our lives had been in Alabama. We were fairly new comers and still adjusting to the different way of life so they were encouraging and supportive. Mr. Peters does an absolutely perfect job mainly because he is gifted with every skill needed for this profession. We became “friends” and felt at ease in the first few moments of walking up to the door which he opened for us. We had a small graveside service. But, everything was done just the way, even better, than we wanted—dignified and simple.

George Irvin Green Funeral Home, Inc. | Munhall, PA The funeral home staff helped with the young children with a play area to keep them busy. They also helped some of the older people get into the viewing area. He explained and answered all the questions for my daughter and son. In fact, Shannon saw something about releasing doves and asked if this could be done with butterflies. They saw that butterflies were released at the end of the service which was wonderful for everyone especially the little girls to watch them fly out of the box.

Wetzel Funeral Home & Crematory | Hanover, PA I have never dealt with a more professional group of people. Joe was very professional and compassionate throughout our entire experience with Wetzel Funeral Home. He was always a step ahead and paid close attention to detail. He made our entire experience effortless from the time I made my first call to the funeral home. Joe was fantastic! He selected a picture to place on the candle of my dad that was so appropriate you would have thought he knew him! He was able to set up an Honor Guard without the family knowing. We were so proud! I will never

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forget that! My dad was very proud of his Navy years and would have been very proud. It was so beautiful that you would have thought this was planned years in advance. Cooper Funeral Home | Tecumseh, OK Jay Cooper sat with us and did his best to keep tensions at a minimum. It was very hard because everyone wanted something different. Meagan’s divorced parents were overwhelmed with tension and grief and left Morgan (Meagan’s sister), Jay and I (her grandmother) to decide the rest of the arrangements. Little by little we spoke with Morgan about a casket for Meagan. Jay took her to the computer and talked to her about it. He did the same with the pillow, lining, etc. She picked a casket that was Meagan’s “style,” --a tufted back panel because Meagan loved Morgan’s tufted headboard; a pillow that reminded Morgan of bow ties because Meagan loved them, and plain draping because she wasn’t a frilly girl. He took the time to make it comfortable for Morgan to make decisions for her sister, her friend… Meagan’s mother barely left the funeral home. She wanted to help set Meagan’s things out so we went about the task of helping her and Jay put out pictures, unfinished paintings, graduation gowns—everything Meagan. I told Jay what we needed and he gave us a room in which we

Exemplary Service could work. He realized it was actually therapeutic for us. When we were done, our sweet Meagan had her life’s story all around her spilling over into the foyer. Jay checked in on us during the day and when lunch came he offered us the break room so we could stay at the funeral home and not have to leave. People came all day to honor Meagan, and Jay tended to her when her make up needed to be retouched and made sure she always looked wonderful. Jay checked in with us several times letting us know what was going to happen or seeing if there was anything to he could do for us….By the time we reached the church for the family dinner, Cooper’s had already arrived and arranged Meagan’s things along with numerous flowers. There were no glitches, no problems just a family grieving for their loved one… In time we will remember Meagan’s funeral not with grief but with a smile and Cooper’s will have helped make this possible. Moore Funeral Home | Hattiesburg, MS Ponda Lee is awesome! She submitted the obituary in a timely fashion. In addition, she designed and printed the program/ order of service to perfection. Ponda is essential to the day-to-day operations of this facility. Brett Moore is awesome! He went above and beyond the call of duty in answering my questions and concerns. He completed all details in a highly professional manner. He is a person of genuine integrity. Because my father was a WWII veteran, the staff handled ALL details in providing active military to play taps and fold the American flag at the interment. I am highly impressed. My father would have been very pleased. Cassaday-Turkle-Christian Funeral Home | Alliance, OH This funeral home has a special talent for making the deceased appear very natural. Also, they provided such a personal touch by using a picture of our church as well as a picture of Walt Disney World, both of which played an important role in our father’s life. Every aspect of the service was tastefully carried out. Our grandson has always liked that particular funeral home because they had root beer barrels in their

candy dishes. We share this because as a small child, he told another funeral director that he needed to get root beer barrels like John Christian. Sure enough, the candy dishes were full of root beer barrels when we arrived for the funeral service. The special attention given to the family of the deceased is what sets them apart from the other funeral homes in our area. Back in 1987 when our three children lost their first grandparent, John took them aside and talked to them about their loss. They still remember how John helped them cope with their grief as they dealt with the loss of their last grandparent. Faulmann & Walsh Golden Rule Funeral Home | Fraser, MI They were very quick to give their service and to pick up the body. They were extremely caring and we didn’t have to pay for anything we didn’t want as a package deal. They gave us a phone number to contact them anytime—day, night, or weekend. The service they provided at the cemetery was exceptional and they stayed there until burial was complete and done to their satisfaction. They had a memorial service in December for families of the deceased who passed away during the year dealing with coping with death which was excellently done with a candle lighting memorial at the end of the evening. The Walsh family is wonderful to make funeral arrangements with and they treat you like family and they are always available even well after the funeral for anything you need. We already have prepaid arrangements with this funeral home because we were so impressed after a friend recommended them.

Linnemann Funeral Homes | Erlanger, KY Kenneth was very in tuned to everything we mentioned and took extra steps to make sure my husband was remembered in such a caring way. Kenneth inquired at Delta Airlines where my husband worked for 37 years if they could do anything special to reflect his devotion to the company. Delta sent a truck from the ramp and parked it at the front of the funeral home and supplied a basket of pins, cookies, and peanuts for the guests. Everything was such a surprise and special. Kenneth took care of Danny’s transportation by Delta to NC for his service and kept us informed on every detail and even spoke to and made arrangements with the funeral home and burial site in NC.

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Milestone Anniversaries

MEMBERSHIP makes a difference Fewer than 5 percent of funeral homes in North America have earned the right to hang an OGR plaque in their funeral homes. That plaque stands for something: It means you’re an OGR funeral home of prestige; you’re an OGR funeral home that operates with integrity; you’re an OGR funeral home that extends the golden rule of service to your community. Most importantly, it means you’re in the OGR family. The following members are celebrating milestone anniversaries in April, May, and June.

55 Years | June 1961 Healy Chapel Aurora, IL

35 Years | April 1981 Dodds Funeral Homes Carrollton, OH

55 Years | May 1961 Silva Funeral Home, Inc. Taunton, MA

35 Years | June 1981 Smith, Bizzell & Warner Funeral Home Gary, IN

55 Years | May 1961 Sossoman Funeral Home and Crematory Center Morganton, NC

30 Years | May 1986 Nelson Bros. Funeral Services Port Melbourne, VIC Australia

50 Years | April 1966 Pray Funeral Home, Inc. Charlotte, MI

25 Years | May 1991 Saamis Memorial Funeral Chapel Medicine Hat, AB Canada

40 Years | June 1976 Grandstaff-Hentgen Funeral Service, Inc. Wabash, IN

15 Years | April 2001 Campagna Funeral Home, Ltd Nashville, IL

35 Years | June 1981 Crawford Funeral Home, Inc. Rochester, NY

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15 Years | June 2001 Davenport Family Funeral Home and Crematory Barrington, IL

15 Years | May 2001 Smith Funeral & Memorial Services Warren, RI 10 Years | April 2006 Hahn-Groeber Funeral & Cremation Services, Inc. Lafayette, IN 10 Years | June 2006 Pitman Funeral Homes, Inc. Wentzville, MO 5 Years | April 2011 Carroway Funeral Home Lufkin, TX 5 Years | May 2011 Stewart Family Funeral Home Tyler, TX

New Members

Funeral Home Member: Pilar Funeral Home Primary Contact: Marisol Trevizo 650 West Avenue D Garland, TX 75040 P: (972) 276-5100 F: (972) 276-5106 mtrevizo@pilarfuneralhome.com pilarfuneralhome.com

Testimonials

Student Members: Paul F. Havey Pittsburgh Institute of Cranberry Twp, PA Robert Powell Eastwick College New York, NY

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