You Are Where You Want To Be
by Ian McFarlane 2014
You Are Where You Want To Be by Ian McFarlane Illustrated by Š 2014
There was once a boy who liked writing and dreaming. He had a magic wardrobe in his bedroom. No-one knew it was a magic wardrobe, although there are lots of magic wardrobes in all sorts of stories, and perhaps all wardrobes are actually magic. When he chose to open the wardrobe, a beautiful light would glow deep inside, and he always felt warm and happy and in the right place. He would stand for a few moments with his eyes closed and then open them onto a world of magic. When he opened them this time he saw a white horse quietly crunching green grass under a clubby oak tree. In the distance he could see a marvellous castle, its flags fluttering against the blue sky. It was sunny and peaceful. He walked softly towards the horse and stopped a few feet away to admire the beautiful creature. “What are you staring at?!” came a voice. “Who are you anyway?” “Blimey”, thought the boy, “a talking horse!” The horse kept on munching the grass. “I said, what are you staring at, and who are you?” “My name is Oliver. I am looking at you.” “No you are not, Oliver. You are looking at my horse and you are talking to it. What a funny boy you are!” Oliver looked up into the tree as a girls’ face peered down on him. “Oh, I didn’t know there was someone in the tree. I didn’t know it was your horse. Actually I thought it might be mine.” “Yours! What in candiwicks name gave you that idea? Who do you think you are Oliver? It is quite obviously my horse, eating my grass under my tree. And you haven’t bowed yet!” “Bowed?” said Oliver “Yes, bowed. As to a Princess. Aren’t you one of those knights who goes around bowing to princesses?” “Should I bow to the horse as well?” asked Oliver.
“Oh you are so funny, Oliver”, laughed the girl. “Yes, actually you should. Go on!” Oliver bowed to the horse and looked up and tried to bow upwards to the princess. The girl swung her legs down, in a rather unprincess-like manner, and acknowledged the bow with a nod of her head. “Well, Oliver, that’s better. Now, what are you doing here?” Oliver looked at the girl. He realized he was staring, but really couldn’t help himself. The girl had the most amazing hair. It seemed to be lots of different colours all at once – silver, brown, ginger – and he couldn’t take his eyes off it. “Well?” “Er, actually, I don’t know. I just came through my magic wardrobe and saw the horse. I am sorry I bowed to the horse. I mean, I am sorry I didn’t bow to you. I mean, I am sorry that it is yours.” “Don’t be sorry, and don’t be silly. Can you catch?” And she threw down an apple, and then jumped just as Oliver tried to catch the apple. He didn’t know whether he should catch the apple or her, and didn’t manage either. “Good. Right. Oh candiwicks, look at the time!” “Time?” said Oliver. She wasn’t looking at a watch. How did she know what time it was? “How do you know what time it is?” he asked. “Time? I always know what time it is when I stand on the ground. That’s actually why I spend so much of it in trees or on my horse. Time stands still when I am not on the ground. I have to go now.” “Oh,” said Oliver, looking down and not knowing whether he should bow again. “Oh, don’t forget your apple.” He tried to smile. That hair really was beautiful, and so was the face in fact. “I..can you tell me...where am I?” The Princess got onto her horse, took hold of the reins, and
brushed her hair out of her eyes. She looked at Oliver, smiled and bent towards him as if to whisper. “You’re where you want to be, Oliver. But don’t stand there too long or the bell will ring.” In a flash, the Princess turned the horse and galloped away down the hill. Oliver watched her, her hair streaming out behind her. He looked down at the green grass around him. He looked up at the blue sky, and he looked back at the Princess, now far away. He could just make out that she was crossing a bridge over a stream. He thought he saw her pause, and then she galloped up the other side of the hill towards the castle. He thought he heard trumpets as she reached the gate. And then he heard a strange ticking sound. It was not coming from the tree, nor on the breeze, but from the ground. He remembered what the Princess has said, “Don’t stand there too long or the bell will ring.” And he sensed that indeed a bell was going to ring, and that he didn’t want to be standing in that grass when it did. But he didn’t want to go away either. He wanted to go forward, towards the castle, towards the Princess. So down the hill he went, not really sure what was going to happen. And as he went down the hill, feeling the breeze in his face, he decided to go faster. And faster he went until he was running, running and happy. Over the bridge he went, up the hill and before he knew it, there he stood in front of the gate to the castle. It looked much bigger than it had seemed from the other side,
and the towers of the castle seemed to reach all the way into the sky. “Open the door then!” came a loud shout from behind him. “Come on .We’ll be late for the King!” A big, rosy-faced man in a yellow and red tunic and very long pointed shoes was struggling up the hill towards the castle. And behind him came a wooden cart and a stream of people in brightly coloured gowns and capes. Tall, short, thin, fat, all carrying poles and flags and musical instruments. There was even a man on a pair of stilts. Someone else was playing a fiddle. They practically barged Oliver out of the way and poured through the gate. But before the gate could close, someone grabbed Oliver and pulled him in with them. There was an incredible bustle inside the courtyard. Like a medieval castle, there were horses and carts, people carrying water, shouting, chickens scurrying around, fires burning and merchants selling cloth, and pans and ornaments. “Oh good you’re here.” came a voice from the sky. In fact, when Oliver looked up, there was the Princess, waving from a balcony above the courtyard. “Time goes by when you’re just standing on the ground,” she yelled. Oliver remembered she’d said that before, or something like that. “Come up the spiral staircase over by the stable,” she pointed to the corner of the courtyard, “and I’ll meet you.” Oliver made his way over to the corner, narrowly escaping a blow on the head from two knights who seemed to be more than practicing their swordplay, and started upwards. The staircase
eventually came to a ledge running round the whole courtyard. Oliver peeked out between the crenulations. There was a great forest beyond the walls, mist gathering from it, and behind it he could see the setting sun, casting a purple shadow over the fields between the forest and the castle. “Hi.” “er..Hi.” It didn’t seem to be the proper thing to say to the Princess, so Oliver bowed a little, and looked up. The Princess was staring at Oliver’s head. “What is it?” He ran his hand through his hair. “It looks like gold. Must be the sun.” “Oh.... yes ....the sun.” “Come on!” She turned and went skipping along the ledge and then under an arched doorway. Oliver followed; up stairs, down stairs, round corners, until at last the Princess stopped at a door in the middle of a long corridor. She looked back at him for a moment, then opened the door and stepped inside. The bustle from outside was gone. The room was very large. There were pictures of castles and hunting scenes, and a great stone fireplace. Oliver stopped in his tracks. In front of the fireplace lay a huge wolf. It was already looking at him with deep eyes. A shallow growl came from its mouth and it raised its head. The Princess stopped and looked back at Oliver who was standing motionless, just inside the door. She paused, as if thinking about something. Then she looked at the wolf. It growled again. And then she came back to Oliver, took his hand, and led him to the red sofa in front of the fire. “Are you sure that wolf isn’t going to bite me. He looks awfully fierce. What’s he doing in here anyway?” That’s Lordy. He looks after me in a way. He’s very old. He never
growls like that. He must like you.” “Like me?! I’m terrified of him. Can’t he be put outside or something?” “I have never seen him act so gently as he did just then. He won’t hurt you. He just wants you to know that he can be fierce and that you should be afraid of him.” “Well, he is and I am.” The wolf growled again, but more like a grump of acknowledgement than a growl, got up very slowly and ambled away from the fire towards another door. He had a slight limp on one of his hind legs. “What will you wear?” “Sorry?” “For the party. Didn’t you see all the actors and entertainers? Tonight my father is holding a Great Ball in honour of my birthday.” “I don’t know. Perhaps I should be going back? How old are you?” “Oh, don’t be silly, I’m not old at all. I know. How about wearing the hunting cape?” “I do feel a bit weird”, said Oliver. The Princess got up and took a tartan cape out of a wardrobe. Oliver thought that the wardrobe looked a bit like his own and he began to wonder whether he really should be going back to his own room at home. It seemed like a long time had passed. “What’s the name of your Kingdom, I wonder.” said the Princess. Oliver wasn’t sure if she was making a pretend Kingdom up or was actually asking him a proper question. “Scotland” they both said at the same time. Oliver stared at the Princess. “Don’t worry, Oliver. Remember, even if you don’t know it, you are where you want to be.” As was appropriate for a Great Ball for a young princess in a castle,
the Great Hall was abuzz with colours and sounds. Everyone seemed to be thoroughly excited dressed up as other people. Even Oliver, “Prince of Scotland”, felt rather happy, and decided to walk in a very grand manner. The Princess by his side was very much like a princess on her birthday – laughing and greeting everyone as she walked into the hall. He was swept along as the crowd parted before her, and managed a bow here and there. As the crowd moved back, the way was clear up to a huge throne, on which, with a huge smile, sat a very grand King. He opened his arms and beamed. “My beautiful Princess, Happy Birthday!” “Father, I would like you to meet Oliver, Prince of Scotland.” Oliver bowed as far down as he could. “I know”, said the King. “Welcome, Oliver. And I think you know who I am, and so do I!” With a clap of his hands, the trumpets sounded and amid “ooohs” and “aaahhhs”, the troupe of entertainers fell into the room, tumbling and dancing. The man in the red and yellow tunic and pointed shoes approached the King, booming out very complicated words with more bows and sweepings of his hand. Oliver caught the King’s eye, who winked back at him. “My lord Master of the Revels, you are well met and welcome. Your prepositous presence brings great mirth to my humble castle!” “Your majesting majesty is too kind. (Another bow). It
is our honour to bring a mystering mystery (he paused just long enough for the crowd to do another “ooohhh”) of great power and persuasion, of love and lovingnessity.” (Another “aahhhh”.Another wink to Oliver). As the performance went on, with the music playing, the banquet and dancing, and the laughter, Oliver was transported. He felt caught up in a whirl, a dream, and yet also very conscious of being outside and inside himself at the same time. The Princess’s hair whisked him around and away and back again. And the King smiled on. Towards the end, the King leaned over to Oliver. “Do I have to go?” “Oh yes, we all have to go. And we can all stay where we want to be, when we know where to find it.” Suddenly there was the sound of a deep bell, and everyone came to a standstill. A good-humoured collective “aaahhh” went round the room, and clapping. The King rose, bowed, and made his way down from the throne. Another wink. Another bow. The Princess took Oliver’s hand and looked him in the eyes. “Time to stand still,” she said. “At least for now.” As people started to leave, she walked him up the stairs. From the parapet they looked out towards the woods, bathed now in a soft white moon. A wolf gracing the grass in the distance. “What happened to his leg?”
“He had to fight for something very important. And when it is a full moon, he goes back to the forest to remember what is important.” “How come you know so much? I want to ask you lots of questions. What happens tomorrow?” Oh, Oliver, that’s good, and yet..,” she paused and looked out into the distance. Her hair was silvery now. “and yet, we really already know everything, we just forget how to look for it.” “Can I come back?” She didn’t answer him. She just smiled, and they walked to her room. The fire was low and calm. She opened the wardrobe door. And he knew. “You are already where you want to be.”