Family Times Auckland Summer Issuu 2014_15

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Siblings with different capabilities Reward effort, not ability, for family harmony.

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How to stalk your kids

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Get online savvy and beat them at their own game.

A news magazine and online resource for families

Multiple births

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How to manage more than one baby.

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AUCKLAND / ISSUE 41 / Summer 2014

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Work-life balance tricky for NZ women Mother of two Dr Annick Masselot balances work and family daily, but says that society still expects more of her as a parent than it does of her husband.

the two sexes.” Even changes to parental leave, generally hailed as a positive step for women, have a downside for gender equality in parenting, says Masselot. Parental leave will be extended from 14 weeks to 16 weeks in 2015, and 18 weeks in 2016. Given that it is predominantly women who take parental leave, expanding maternity leave entrenches women into a asselot and her husband, who both work domestic role, she says. as associate professors at the University of Canterbury, share work and home/family “It’s a reflection of how responsibilities on an equal basis. She drops production is more the children to school in the morning and he valued than reproduction picks them up in the afternoon. But people’s in our society, in New expectations on her are quite different from Zealand.” those on her husband, she says. “Recently I went away for three weeks to Europe. My husband was looking after the children, and friends would tell him how well he was doing, how he is able to cook for them “There’s a reason for maternity leave: it’s to recover from giving birth. You need 6 to10and look after them. He gets a lot of help from other women and offers of play dates for weeks. If you want to expand leave, I think it’s the kids. It’s like, a good father doesn’t require a better idea to have the father take part of this leave and to have men bonding with their child.” a lot, as long as the children are still alive. Masselot also thinks that parental leave should “When he goes away, I don’t get any help. be paid on a wage equivalent to a worker’s Nobody tells me how I’m a good mother for looking after the kids alone. What’s expected normal earnings, not the minimum wage as it is currently, and that employers should pay a of women is so much more than what is part of that cost. expected of men so far as parenting goes.” Masselot is an employment lawyer who works “The payment is on the minimum wage. It’s a reflection of how production is more valued in the university’s School of Business and than reproduction in our society, in New Economics researching paid work and how it Zealand. is evolving and changing. However, for all of “I think that the employer should pay part the advances in equality, Masselot says that parenthood is still strictly a gendered concept. of the maternity leave because I think that companies are not entities that are excluded “Being a good parent is seen differently for

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from society. They benefit from us have children, and continuing society. Companies should not be seen as being apart from society. It’s an outdated way to see employers outside of the whole issue. Production and reproduction are linked.” New Zealand legislation is also stacked against less affluent women, Masselot says. For example, you have to be in a job for at least a year to benefit from parental leave. This disadvantages lower wage workers who have casual jobs, or who frequently change employment. She also says that the Family Tax Credit package needs an overhaul, as it doesn’t support people who aren’t in mainstream types of relationships. “The reality is that there are a lot of people who are single parents; it’s just a fact of life in Western countries. And that’s not much taken into account when you look at the Family Tax Credit package.

“What’s expected of women is so much more than what is expected of men so far as parenting goes.” “In order to receive the benefit the parents need to have a certain level of employment. If you are a single parent - and most single parents are mothers - you have to work. How do you combine that with raising the children? And child care is really expensive or not always readily available in New Zealand in the

areas where you need it.” Masselot says that New Zealand really needs to have a conversation about reproduction and how best to support families. “The main thing is there should be choices for people. For me, I think we need to have this discussion and we can figure out what is important in terms of children.”

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inside this issue

From the editor Contents Writing this column is usually the last thing that I do each edition, once I know that everything else is safely filed and I have a few moments to gather my thoughts.

2 Women balancing work and family

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ell, that moment has arrived, and I had a sudden realisation that we haven’t included a lot of Christmas content in our yearend edition. Not on purpose, not deliberately. It just seemed that our editorial team had a wealth of other important topics to cover. But with Christmas just around the corner, and Christmas/holiday planning occupying most of our minds, it seems remiss not to focus on it a little. Especially for me – I love Christmas! The lights, the music, the excitement of children’s faces, the holidays – it all adds up to awesome in my book. Of course it’s not like that for everyone. For some, it’s just become another commercial holiday and a reason for a break. There’s nothing wrong with that, but it’s not exactly the reason for Christmas. Christmas is about family, I hear a lot of people say. And yes, it’s a wonderful time to gather together and spend some quality time enjoying each other’s company. But family is not the reason for Christmas either. My mother frequently laments that when she goes to buy Christmas decorations that she can find Santa and his reindeer - and oddly enough this season, owls - but she can’t find nativity characters for love or money. That seems peculiar to me, given that I lived 10 minutes from the Church of the Nativity in

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Features More is expected of women parents than men, says UC assistant professor.

5 Parenting kids with different capabilities

Bethlehem for almost four years, and pilgrims from all around the world would queue up there to see the place where Jesus was born. Now as Kiwis, we pride ourselves on calling a spade a spade. So whether you believe the nativity story or not, it is the primary reason for the holiday that we now call Christmas, and for someone who has a very soft spot for Bethlehem, I think it’s important that our kids are aware of the holiday’s true meaning, as well as all the other Christmas traditions we have invented over the years. I know these days that we are supposed to be politically correct and say “Happy Holidays” and I truly do wish everybody happy holidays – be it Christmas, Hanukkah, Eid or something else. But I’m still going to say Merry Christmas. Because that’s what it is. So from myself and the whole team here at Family Times, we wish you a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Enjoy.

John Cowan from The Parenting Place shares his advice on the topic.

15 Family Fitness

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16 Beating bedtime battles

Step into your child’s online world and beat them at their own game.

8 Multiple births

Sure, they’re cute – but how do you physically manage twins, triplets, or more?

9 Children and depression

Parenting expert Diane Levy answers your parenting questions.

Kids Corner

10 Kids’ corner

Competitions, games and reviews.

Is your child going through life’s natural ups and downs, or is it more?

Resource information

Green Kiwis are graduating from Enviroschools.

4 Spirit of Christmas 12 Calendar of events 13 Entertainment

14 Next generation of eco-warriors

Books, uniform and haircut – check. But is your child school-ready?

18 Words of Wisdom

6 How to stalk your kids

Consistency is the key to sleep time dramas.

17 Preparing your four-year-old for school

Kelly Young has tips for mums on keeping fit at home.

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About Us Publisher Robyn Willis Design & Production Moody Shokry Advert Production Target Press Production Office Editor Vanessa O’Brien Digital editor Rochelle Savage

Take the kids to Rainbow Springs these holidays and they will get in for free*. Just use the code ‘kidsgofree’ when booking online at www.rainbowsprings.co.nz *Terms and conditions apply

Media Executives Shona Robb, Nicky Barnett, Katie Morgan, Naomh Cusin, Penny Leary , Olwyn Knowler Office Manager Raelyn Hay Office Assistant Jackie Pithie

Contributing Writers Marcia Johnson, Diane Levy Kelly Young Reach us at: Family Publishers (NZ) P.O. Box 36-004, Christchurch 8146, NZ Ph. 03-355-9186 0800285 510 Fax: 03 3559 183 Mobile. 0274-359-414 admin@familytimes.co.nz www.familytimes.co.nz

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Distribution Printed and distributed quarterly approximately two weeks before each major school holiday. 59,089 distributed through early childhood centres, primary, intermediate schools and city council libraries. The opinions expressed in this publication are not those of the publisher unless indicated otherwise. No part of this publication may be reprinted without the expressed written permission of the publisher. Family Times is not responsible for unsolicited material. Family Times is funded and published solely through the support of its advertisers. They support us, please support them.

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Spirit of Christmas It’s that time of year to deck the halls and get into all the wonderful festivities that the Christmas season has to offer. Looking for some Christmas activities and events? Here are a few in your area to get you started:

and much more. Stalls are available for $5 each. Contact the Pt Chev Community Centre on 09-846-1094 or email ptchev. communitycentre@xtra.co.nz.

Glenbrook Vintage Railway Santa Day

Santa will be on the steam train, and all children ride free when accompanied by their parent(s) on this day (14 December) from 10.30am – 3pm. Adults $20.

Tree Decorating Fiesta - Mt Kmart Wishing Tree Appeal Eden Christmas This year the Appeal aims to collect more than 45,000 gifts that will be distributed by The Salvation Army to families that might otherwise go without. Simply purchase a gift of your choice, collect a gift tag from any Kmart store and place it under the tree. Begins 13 November.

Festive fun day

Get ready for Christmas with a festive fun day at Voyager NZ Maritime Museum. Kayaking, Christmas crafts, kite flying and more, it’s the perfect way to prepare for the silly season. On 13 December, Visit www. maritimemuseum.co.nz.

A Pirate Christmas Party

Join Captain Festus McBoyle and his pirate colleagues in these interactive concerts for children age 2 to 5-years and their families. Auckland Town Hall Great Hall, 29 November, 10am and 1.30am. Tickets $15, phone 09-623-1052.

Pt Chev Xmas Kids-only Market

Stalls are run by kids, for kids, 6 December from 9am. Gifts, toys, games, clothes, baking

Decorate a baby Christmas trees! Every tree completed gets a prize and can be carried home by the young decorator. Village Green, Essex Street Reserve, Mt Eden, Saturday 6 December 12 – 1pm. Donation $10.

Christmas Carnival

A fantastic family fun evening including bouncy Kids pop the first gifts under the Kmart Wishing Tree Appeal. castle, obstacle course, rides, food stalls, old at Auckland Domain for Christmas in the Park school games, Santa’s grotto and heaps more Carols evening on Saturday 13 December 2014 at 7:30pm. A celebration of Christmas for all the family. fun. Orewa Primary School, 86 Maire Road, An evening of choral singing, congregational 28 November 4-8pm. Ellerslie Santa Parade singing and readings. Saturday 6 December, See the iconic Ellerslie Santa Parade: a Waiuku Christmas Display 7-8.30pm, St Mar’s Catholic Church, free. fantastic parade with lots to see and a great Be entertained by Santa singing in a snow way to get into the festive spirit. Ellerslie Christmas at the Races cave, fabulous fibre optic arches and an town centre, 7 December, 11am-12pm. Visit Christmas at Ellerslie great company, interactive Christmas Wonderland. Waiuku www.ellerslie.net.nz. delicious food and a buzzing atmosphere. Memorial Town Hall, 29 November – Loads for the entire family with a swing 24 December, 10am-8pm. Visit www. Santa Parade & ball park, bouncy castle and much more! christmasdisplay.co.nz. Blockhouse Bay School From 1pm, Sunday 14 December, Ellerslie Onehunga Santa Parade Carnival Racecourse. Visit www.ellerslie.co.nz. Face painting and balloon art, photos with Blockhouse Bay will host a Santa Parade on Coca Cola Christmas in the Blockhouse Bay Road, in the stretch of road Santa, games, bouncy castle, candy floss and sausage sizzles. Santa Parade from 11.30am outside the library. Parade starts at 10.45am, Park to 12pm on Onehunga Mall (between Arthur The country’s top singers, dancers, musicians, entertainment from 9:30am. Straight after Street and Princes Street). On 29 November. choirs and bands prepare to ignite the big stage the parade will be the Blockhouse Bay School Carnival.

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Parenting kids with different capabilities The Parenting Place creative producer/presenter John Cowan talks to Family Times about how to raise kids of different abilities. Do parents tend to rate their kids based on their abilities? “Inevitably that’s going to be the case. I think in general, most parents are aware that favouritism and rating is an incredibly negative thing: nothing feels as bad as believing that you are the least-loved child. But I think that it’s inevitable that parents will have a sense of their kids’ abilities, and the interesting thing is that the kids themselves are very conscious of their siblings’ abilities. Children with siblings that have a disability become very aware of this and very defensive and sometimes compensate or feel guilty for that.” Is it a problem for siblings to play down their abilities to compensate for their less talented brothers or sister? Like perhaps handing a report card to their parents secretly? “I think it’s actually quite a nice thing that brothers and sisters do. I’m sure that it’s not universally true but I do know that it happens.” What kinds of abilities are perceived to be more important than others? “I think parents are probably – now this is off the top of my head and not based on research – quite accepting of their kids having a wide range of academic and sporting abilities. The

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thing that I think irritates them most is there are just as bigger variations in social ability. Some kids are relaxed and funny and poised, and other kids are awkward, and I tend to think that parents tolerate that less well than the variations in academic and physical ability. If your kid is a bit rude, a bit forward or impatient, parents I think are much less willing to tolerate that probably because in our minds we don’t see that as ability, we see it as character and I think that’s sad. It is an area of giftedness and training.” Do you think that every child has a talent or a gift? “Probably a measure of this is almost a statement of faith: I believe that every child is a gifted child, even those children who have learning disabilities and developmental problems, they’ll have some ability that when discovered and polished up gives that child the ability to experience that sense of excelling.” How can parents bring out the best in all of their kids? One way is to allow them to try a bouquet of different things, especially during their primary school years. Try a whole range of crafts and sports and social outlets and those kinds of things. Some things may crash, and other things they may discover that they’re really good at. But you have to be bad at something for a while before you find out that you’re good at it. The other thing is not to shackle your child with your own desire to have been a ballet dancer, an All Black or a helicopter pilot or something like that. I can remember my child,

my boy when he was 13, helping him get the money together for a course of flying lessons. He did the course of flying lessons - he did 10 - he quite enjoyed it but he decided not to carry on with it. And I thought, “Why doesn’t he want to carry on with it? Isn’t this his dream?” But really it was my dream. I think we do this a lot. How can parents make kids who are not excelling as much feel equally loved and valued? Some people think, “Should we not celebrate the gifted child, because won’t that make the less gifted child feel worse?” I think you do celebrate the achievements of the gifted child, but you work extra hard to discover those areas where the other child excels as well.

Also, you do things like celebrate progress; you celebrate effort instead of just raw achievement. In fact, there’s some research that shows that there’s a huge difference between celebrating natural ability and celebrating effort. If you just celebrate and complement a child on their natural ability; their looks, their intelligence, their natural athletic ability, then that’s basically saying that what you’ve been dealt in life is your lot, and those kids with natural ability who hit some kind of obstacle think “well that’s what I’ve been dealt, I can’t do any better than that.” Whereas, kids who have had their efforts celebrated rather than their natural abilities, they think, “I can tackle this. I can roll my sleeves up and work even harder.”


feature story

How to stalk your kids Warning: parents; don’t let your kids read this article. This is for you: stalking 101.

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nce it was easy. Stalking your kids meant an old-fashioned stake out, a covert room search or classic eavesdropping on private phone conversations. Your greatest asset was your intuition, and your greatest weapon your resourcefulness. Alas, today’s parents are faced with a vast terrain of unchartered online territory, full of pitfalls and traps. How can you protect your kids when you are a stranger in a strange land? Parents’ greatest worries when it came to the internet were predators said NetSafe development manager Chris Hails. “The number one concern for most parents is, “Who are my kids speaking to online, what are their motivations if they don’t know them in real life, and can they be trusted to be who they say they are?”” Hails said. And that’s fair call. There is a reason why there are TV shows that are set up as “sting operations” to catch predators who use social media to get to kids.

Privacy vs. duty of care

But do parents have a legal or an ethical right to invade their child’s privacy? After all, there’s always a sneaking sense of guilt when operating manual stalking operations like eavesdropping or room searching, so is it okay to stalk your kids online? “It’s a trade-off between the right of the child to privacy and the right and the duty of the parent to parent basically. I think what we tend to say is that the parent’s responsibility

to safeguard and to keep the child safe from harm pretty much trumps the child’s right to privacy,” said Hails. And when it comes to internet safety, he added, the price of failure is too high.

“Digital citizenship is essentially a culture of responsibility in young people’s online behaviour.”

To stalk or not to stalk

Lots of families set up rules so that if the kids have a social media account, the parents have the passwords, otherwise the kids can’t use the computer. That’s in a perfect world of course. When then doesn’t work, or it’s already too late for that, some undercover parents set up a covert online profile and follow their kids on Twitter or “friend” them on Facebook. Short of that there are plenty of online monitoring apps and programmes that you can install on your child’s phone or computer to control how much time they can spend online, which sites they can visit and the content of any text messages and emails. However, no filter or site-blocking software is foolproof, and Hails says that they are not ideally used covertly, as monitoring without consultation can have the reverse effect of that desired.

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“What we tend to encourage is that if you are going to go down the filtering or the monitoring route, make sure that that is backed up by a conversation.” And stalking can backfire. “If you start out trying to police what they’re doing, and they feel that they are being spied upon, what can happen is that the kids will go out and buy another mobile phone, or they’ll go around to a friend’s place and jump on the internet there, and they’ll end up sort of creating a second profile.” Instead, NetSafe encourages all parents to

have an open and honest conversation with their children about what they are doing online and who they are talking to, and the earlier the better. That way if their kids have issues or concerns about behaviour or messages that they are receiving, they have an open door to talk to their parents. “Make sure that you talk to them in a fairly frank and trustworthy way so that you don’t overreact and freak them out and they think “I’ll never tell Mum or Dad about that again, they’ll just freak out and take my phone away or they’ll stop me using the internet.”

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feature story Age appropriate stalking

despite the fact that the sites’ age restriction is 13-years. Added to that is that most For younger kids, filtering and monitoring intermediate age children have a cell phone is a good step when done in tandem with that often has internet access. So early those conversations, says Hails. He suggests education is the key. a family safety contract, in which online NetSafe teaches digital citizenship in schools. time is monitored and limited, and an open Digital citizenship, explains Hails, is essentially atmosphere is created. a culture of responsibility in young people’s As the kids gets get older, they instinctively online behaviour. It covers things like bullying, desire more independence. But just like ethics, and an inbuilt sense of what they teaching other safety rules like crossing should do. It’s about treating people online the road and not getting into the car with strangers, there comes a time when you have the same way that you would in the real world – and that includes stranger danger. to trust their responsibility. For older kids, it also includes talking about “Young people as they develop want privacy, their digital footprint. As the latest Snapchat but as a parent you’ve still got a duty of care. saga of celebrities’ leaked personal photos has So if you’ve created a trusting feel around emphasised, even pictures that you think are the internet and you haven’t scared your children away from talking to you, we strongly private and short-lived are stored digitally and become part of your digital footprint forever. encourage that really.” And the same goes for personal information That’s a sentiment that our Family Times that you transmit online. readers seemed to agree with when we asked them to post on Facebook about their kids’ online usage. One respondent wrote, “The parent’s “There is an age where we need to trust our responsibility to kids to make the right decisions. I guess that age depends on many factors as some youth safeguard and to keep require more supervision/discipline than the child safe from harm others. If we start young, then they should pretty much trumps the carry on that good behaviour. If we are loose child’s right to privacy.” while they are growing up and then freak out and start putting hundreds of restrictions around them, in the teenage years we can incite them to rebellion.” “We encourage young people not to share photos of their bodies, not to put pictures Digital citizenship of them drinking or taking drugs up online Kids are using the internet at a young age, because that becomes part of your digital says Hails – some as early as kindergarten. footprint that people can search and find.” And a lot of primary age children use social For younger kids, even from the age that they networks like Facebook and Instagram learn to spell their own name and learn their to have an online life and social profile,

Parental control apps/software for smart phones

Android phones

Vodafone Guardian Vodafone Guardian is a free Android app for mobile customers that lets you decide who can call or text message your child, when they can use their phone and whether they can browse the web, download apps or use the camera. You can set the phone to only accept calls from friends and family, block apps like YouTube, and choose who your child can receive text messages from. Visit www.vodafone.co.nz.

Apple iOS – iPhone, iPod Touch McAfee Family Protection ($49.95) This parental control software has unique media filtering and advanced activity reports. Visit home.mcafee.com. iOS free settings Maybe your kid spends way too much time browsing the internet via Safari, uses the camera in ways that are not appropriate, or perhaps they went on a spending spree address and phone number, they need to know that the information is private and they should never give it to anybody – online or in real life – that they don’t know.

Brave new world

Perhaps the best way for parents to beat kids at their own game is to familiarise themselves with the online world, says Hails. “Take an interest in what they do. Get them to show you what they like doing on the internet and why. The kids can teach the parents what they are doing and the games

in the App Store and you didn’t know until your credit card bill came in the mail. Whatever the case may be, find out how to regain some parental control by enabling restrictions. Visit www.imore.com for more information.

Symbian (Nokia phones) Kaspersky Mobile Security ($29.95) You can block dangerous and phishing websites, as well as filter unwanted calls and text messages with this software. Visit www.antivirus365.net. Windows Mobile 7 With Mobile Parental Control, you can set Windows parental controls anywhere, at anytime, via your smart phone. You can set specific log on time limits and the specific time duration, amongst other things. Visit sites.google.com/site/millicloudworkshop/ moparco for more information. You can also use this software for you PC.

that they are playing so that there’s this sense of trust and “we’re all in this together.”

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The challenge of multiple births It’s easy to peer into a pram at the supermarket and ooh and ahh over a set of adorable twins dressed in matching outfits.

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hile we fawn over the cuteness of it all, we must admit to smiling sheepishly at the mum of multiples and wondering, how on earth does she do it? Having one baby is hard enough; it’s difficult to imagine doubling or even tripling the load. Multiple births are on the rise in New Zealand, due in part to the increasing age of mothers and the use of fertility drugs. According to Statistics New Zealand 1950 children were multiple births in 2007, compared with 1051 in 1977. There is no question that raising multiples presents some unique parenting challenges. Amanda Meikle of Halswell is mum to sixyear-old twins Liam and Aden, plus big sister Mikayla, who was just 20-months-old when the boys were born. Amanda tells how she has coped with some common twin challenges: Sleep: “We got them into a feeding routine fairly quickly, which helped us get some sleep. Generally, one would be more awake than the other at each feed, but we tried to keep them on the same schedule. You can’t demand feed with twins or you’ll be up half the night feeding them!” Breastfeeding: “I found it quite easy as I have a lot of milk. I had a tri-pillow across my tummy and I used a rugby hold to feed them both at once. I fed them like that until four months, then I had to feed them separately because they got too big. I breast fed until five-and-a-half months.”

Sibling bonding: “They’ve always had a bond. They had twin-speak when they were really little. They would jibber jabber to each other and you couldn’t understand what they were saying, but they’d be laughing. Sometimes they would fight over a toy but you just let them figure it out.” Individuality: “They are very different. Liam is fast and sporty – he doesn’t sit still. Aden is a little bit more chilled. Aden has a disability, Sturge-Weber syndrome, which makes a difference. If he didn’t have that I think they’d be more alike.”

“Multiple births are on the rise in New Zealand, due in part to the increasing age of mothers and the use of fertility drugs.” Separation anxiety: “They’re in the same class at school but don’t have the same friends. They keep an eye on each other and know where each other is. On occasion when I have to take Aden for hospital appointments overnight, Liam likes his sister to sleep in his bedroom so there’s someone else there. Same with Aden when Liam is away.” Support: “I had support from my mum. Also we got a nanny when I went back to work because it was easier and cheaper to keep them at home rather than putting them all into preschool.” The hardest thing? “Juggling their wants and needs, because when one comes at you the other one comes at you. They tag team you I think. Making myself available for both

of them, as well as my daughter, was the most difficult thing.” Advice: “Get as much information as you can from people who can help you out, such as the Multiple Birth Club. Twins are definitely fun but it’s a lot of hard work. It’s the same as having one, but twice as much demand – you’ve just got to be patient. The first two years go really fast. Having a good support network and asking for help when you need it makes it a lot easier.”

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Children and depression Make sure your child isn’t paying grown up fares.

Depression appears more prevalent today. How can you tell whether your child is just going through life’s natural ups and downs, or whether they need a little extra help to get them through a very rough patch?

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ood stress can keep us motivated and focused, but often young people are dealing with too much pressure. They might be worrying about friendships, relationships, school work, bullying, family, jobs, fitting in, appearances - it’s a lot to think about. Then, sometimes parents can put too much pressure on children to achieve. If people stay stressed for too long, or have too many things causing stress in their lives, they can become physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted, or even depressed. It’s important to find ways to relax and unwind, let go of things we can’t control and take a break when we need one. Depression is more than just feeling a bit down – feeling stressed, irritable, sad, angry, hopeless or empty happens to all of us sometimes. Depression is getting stuck in those feelings for a while, when it doesn’t seem like they’re going away and they get in the way of relating to people or thinking clearly.

• • •

Don’t care about things they used to enjoy Sleep a lot or not enough Lose or gain weight, or have a different appetite for food • Can’t concentrate • Feel tired or low in energy • Have unexplained aches and pains • Feel guilty, worthless or hopeless about the future • Are angrier or more hostile than usual • Harm or hurt themselves on purpose • Talk about suicide or say they want to die Let them know you’re available to talk and What to do? give them the time and space to respond. If It can be hard to know when to worry about kids you are worried, you could suggest they see a – what’s normal and when to get more support. doctor or counsellor. Let them know there is It’s common to be unsure how and when to step help available and they don’t have to feel bad in and help, or even if you should. all the time. If you feel something is not quite right, trust your It can be difficult for young people to talk instincts and take action. Talk to them about about feeling low or depressed - they might it, show your support and get involved. It’s feel as though no one will believe them or especially important to step in if their behaviour is they’ll be told it’s just a phase. Depression can completely out of character, or it’s getting in the be really hard to deal with, but with the right way of them being able to do things normally. help, your child can get through it.

Get some extra support if you notice they: • Feel sad or down for a long time - weeks or months

Helpful websites: www.sparx.org. nz (offers free online therapy) www.thelowdown.org.nz www. commonground.org.nz Some information sourced with permission of www.commonground.org.nz.

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Make sure your child is getting the discount that they are entitled to. Buy an AT HOP card and register it online in your child’s name to start saving! For school children over 16, you can apply for a secondary student concession at a customer service centre.

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9


win win win

WIN Alexander and the Terrib le, Horrib le, No G ood, Very B ad Day, – prize packs Disney’s Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day follows 11-year-old Alexander (Ed Oxenbould) as he experiences the most terrible and horrible day of his young life. He soon learns that he’s not alone when his mum (Jennifer Garner), dad (Steve Carell), brother (Dylan Minnette) and sister (Kerris Dorsey) all find themselves living through their own terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. We have 8 prize packs containing a T-shirt, cup, bookmark, notebook, door hanger, stressball and a family pass (4 tickets). In Cinemas 4 December. This competition ends 15 December 2014. Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz.

Win Paddington prize packs

Kids Time Welcome to Kids’ Time at Family Times. Enjoy the fun activities and competitions. For competitions, enter online by visiting www.familytimes. co.nz and click on the competitions link. Looking for some rainy day activities for your children? Click on the For Kids section on our website for answers and for further activities your children can print out and complete.

Search - a- word

win win win

A young Peruvian bear with a passion for all things British travels to London in search of a home. Finding himself lost and alone at Paddington Station, he begins to realise that city life is not all he had imagined - until he meets the kindly Brown family, who read the label around his neck (“Please look after this bear. Thank you.”) and offer him a temporary haven. In Cinemas 18 December. We have 4 Paddington prize packs to give away with tickets and other goodies. This competition ends 15 December 2014 . Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz.

spot difference Spot the the Difference

Can you you spot spot the the eight eight differences between these two two pictures? pictures? Candifferences you spotbetween differences Can these

win win win

WIN with Disney’s Big Hero 6 – prize packs To celebrate the upcoming release of Disney’s Big Hero 6 on 26 December, Walt Disney Studios has 5 x prize packs to give away. Each prize pack contains the following items: A double pass to Disney’s Big Hero 6 valid from 26 December 2014 at any participating cinema A Shimmer sticker set A Collector cards set A Keychain A Folding cube A Plastic pouch A Lenticular notebook A Kid’s T-shirt This competition ends 15 December 2014 . Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz.

© Lovatts Puzzles © Lovatts Puzzles

win win win Win The Jacq u eline Wilson Christmas Cr acker The Jacqueline Wilson Christmas Cracker is packed with brilliant Christmas stories, including a brand-new tale from Jacqueline, and classic favourite starring Tracy Beaker in which Jacqueline’s most famous heroine gets the lead part in her Christmas play! There are festive puzzles, tasty Christmas recipes, perfect present tips, and fun Christmas facts. This competition ends 1 February 2015. Enter online at www. familytimes.co.nz.

10

www.familytimes.co.nz

Spot The Difference - Cartoon Spot The Difference Cartoon WIN and -st yle like spotDiff_033_Beach.eps spotDiff_033_Beach.eps © Lovatts Puzzles © Lovatts Puzzles Minnie!

win win win

1. Sunbather missing, 2. Girl’s hat different, 3. Floatie missing eyes,

1. Sunbather missing, 2.will Girl’skeep hat different, 3. Floatie missing eyes, Minnie’s beauty cases all5.the 4. Flower missing from girl’s costume, Beach ball missing, 6. Stripe on boy’s costume, 4. Flower missing from girl’s costume, 5. Beach ball missing, 6. Stripe on boy’s costume, 7. Spade longer, 8. Flag onentertained! sandcastle bigger. young ladies stylish and 7. Spade longer, 8. Flag on sandcastle bigger. They’ll be straightening, curling, styling and accessorising their way to perfect hair. The perfect fun-filled afternoon with a bestie! Thanks to Holdson we have three Minnie Beauty Cases to giveaway. RRP $57. Available from www.holdson.com. This competition ends 1 February 2015. Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz.


win win win

Ma z e

Win B rother’s L14 sewing machine Brother’s L14 sewing machine is exceptionally easy to use. Built-in are 14 utility and decorative stitches and an automatic 4-step buttonhole maker in a compact, lightweight sewing machine. Whether you want to make stylish clothes or craft a beautiful home décor project, Brother is at your side to help. We have one Brother L14 to give away, valued at $179.95. This competition ends 1 February 2015. Enter online at www. familytimes.co.nz

win win win

Win The Dinosau r That series Read along with Tom and Dougie as Danny and Dinosaur make history in their third adventure, The Dinosaur That Pooped The Past. When they accidently go back through history on a time-travelling swing, Danny and Dinosaur meet some new dino friends. We have three The Dinosaur That…giveaway packs with a copy of each from the series (three in total).This competition ends 1 February 2015. Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz.

Desig n com petition Design a tent or treehouse for you or your family to live in and then describe it. Send us your picture and be in to win an amazing $50 prize pack from Crayola! Three entry age groups: preschool (age 1-4), 5-8, 9-12. Create your design on an A5 sheet or download the template and entry form from www.familytimes. co.nz. Post in to PO Box 36 004, Christchurch 8146. Entries close 1 February 2015. Congratulations to our competition winners from our last issue. They are: 1-4 Madelynn Seaton-Payne (Age 3 ½) “This is Spotty Spot. She had a fruit salad hat and flowers for hands, and her clothes have flowers too. She’s my teddy.” 5-8 Cameron Bell (Age 5) “This is my dad wearing a cucumber shirt, carrot pants and a tomato belt. He has kale hair and a banana mouth. The sun is a sunflower.” 9-12 Sophie (Age 10) “My dress has: sunflowers, poppy, carrots, peas, rose, bluebell, purple loosestrife, potatoes, foxglove, broccoli, pickle, tulip, pumpkin, egg plant, tomato, lettuce, flowers, ivy, daisy.” Please visit www.familytimes.co.nz to view the winning entries.

Win Billie G oat Soap

Win A Treasu ry of NZ Poems for Childr en The best New Zealand poems for children, collected by highly-regarded New Zealand poet Paula Green and illustrated inventively by Jenny Cooper. This lively collection is truly a must-have for every home, school and library. Bursting with wonderful poems that will make you laugh, cry and ponder, A Treasury of NZ Poems for Children is beautifully illustrated and makes a perfect gift book. With poems by all the big names in both children’s and adult’s writing, as well as some fresh new poets, it will captivate readers both young and old . We have five copies to give away. This competition ends 1 February 2015. Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz.

win win win

win win win

Win SodaStr eam Pl ay

Billie Goat Soap has discovered the benefits of goats’ milk and olive oil, and created a range of natural, affordable and effective skincare for every family member, young and old. Beginning with one revolutionary bar of soap, all Billie Goat Soap products are perfect for use on sensitive skin types, while also helping to relieve symptoms for those prone to eczema, psoriasis and dermatitis. We have a prize pack worth more than $200 to give away. This competition ends 1 February 2015. Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz.

Win Opal Plumstead by Jacq u eline Wilson Opal Plumstead might be plain, but she has always been fiercely intelligent. Yet her scholarship and dreams of university are snatched away when her father is sent to prison, and 14-year-old Opal must start work at the Fairy Glen sweet factory to support her family. This is a brilliantly gripping new story from the bestselling, award-winning Jacqueline Wilson. This competition ends 1 February 2015. Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz.

win win win

Make water more exciting with the brand new SodaStream Play! It will have the whole family bubbling with ideas, and is available in black, yellow, red, blue and white from Farmers, Briscoes, Noel Leeming, The Warehouse and other stockists of SodaStream, RRP $139.99. Visit www.facebook.com/SodaStreamNZ. This competition ends 1 February 2015. Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz.

win win win

Win a Mustel a B each Set

win win win

Mustela, the experts in skincare for babies, are giving away the perfect summer time companion: A Mustela Beach Set, which includes the Mustela High Protection Sunscreen in SPF50+. With ingredients such as Aloe Vera and soy phytosterols rich in Vitamin E, your baby’s skin is not only protected but rejuvenated. This competition ends 1 February 2015. Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz. www.familytimes.co.nz

11


cool activities

Calendar of Events Summer is here, and it’s time to get excited about all that the new season has to offer. For more event and entertainment ideas, visit www.familytimes.co.nz and enjoy our large, familyfriendly resource. 29 November 2014 Ukulele Festival. Kiwi songs and artists, all-day workshops, a grand parade and shows for the little kids. Food, stalls, competitions, prizes and surprises. The Trusts Arena, 11am4pm. Free.

3 December Sanitarium Weet-Bix Kids TRYathlon. The Mountfort Park event will start at 10am with a swim held in the indoor pool located at the Aquatic Centre beside the park. Visit try. weetbix.co.nz for more details.

6-7 December Gypsy Fair Original. Popular famous fair that comes to town only once a year, featuring thirty Gypsy families in interesting house-trucks and buses. Craigavon Park, from 9am.

13 December Get ready for Christmas with a festive fun day to keep the kids entertained at Voyager NZ Maritime Museum. Kayaking, Christmas

crafts, kite flying and more, it’s the perfect way to prepare for the silly season.

13 December Oceania Summer Festival. A one-nightonly show that brings entertainment live from the Pacific. Orewa Arts & Events Centre, 7-10.30pm, 0800 BUY TIX (289 849).

26 December The New Zealand Herald Boxing Day Races. Children will be entertained for free with the Tip Top Popsicle Planet, New Zealand Herald Giant Games and Ellerslie Swingball Park. From 11am, visit www. ellerslie.co.nz.

8-11 January 20145 Funfest 2015. On at Alexandra Park from 9am to 5pm each day. This is a family event with free entry, parking and entertainment. Visit www.funfest.co.nz.

16 January Movie in the Park. Rocky Horror Picture Show will be on the giant screen at Tamakae reserve. This is a free event with live entertainment from 6.30pm until the movie starts at approximately 8.30pm.

17 January

See hundreds of beautiful hand-crafted Chinese lanterns at the Auckland Lantern Festival.

8 February NZ Home Loans XRACE Orewa. An adventure-style event for parent/guardian and child completing both physical and mental challenges. From 3-5pm, Orewa Beach Reserve, visit www.xrace.co.nz.

14 February Chinese New Year Festival. Welcome the Year of the Sheep with lion/dragon dance, specialist stalls with traditional Chinese cuisine, entertainment, and more. ASB Showgrounds, 9.30-4pm, visit www. aucklandchinese.org.nz.

Girls Only Go Skateboard Day. Don’t 27 February – 1 March worry if you have never ridden a skateboard or longboard before; our instructors will give Auckland Lantern Festival. Dozens of you tips to get you rolling. On at QBE Stadium delicious Asian food stalls and hundreds of 10am-2pm. Visit www.onboardskate.org.nz. beautiful lanterns specially imported from

China. Non-stop entertainment including martial arts performers from Shanghai and beautiful puppets from Guangzhou. Albert Park, 5-10pm.

28 February – 1 March Day Out with Thomas. Thomas the Tank Engine, Sir Topham Hatt, the Fat Controller, Bulgy the Bus, Terrence the Tractor and Rusty return to Glenbrook Vintage Railway. From 10am. For prices and tickets visit www. railfan.org.nz.

28 February Orewa Beach Sand Castle Competition. A fun day out for the whole family. Register to partake in the sand castle competition – beginners, experienced and professionals welcome. Moana Reserve, 10am-3pm, visit www.sandcastle.co.nz.

New Zealand An invitation to all girls aged 5 to 18... Come join the fun & friendship at any of our nationwide locations.

www.girlsbrigade.org.nz E-mail: info@girlsbrigade.org.nz

make IT

minecraft SUMMER SCHOOL HOLIDAY FUN!

$10 CHILD

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ADULT Suits children 5-12 yrs

12

SAT 13 DEC, 10AM-5PM Get ready for Christmas with an action-packed day of activities at the Maritime Museum. Try your hand at kite flying, blow some bubbles, make a Christmas craft or dress up in a costume. For a small charge, you can even go on a kayaking adventure around Princes Wharf. And don’t forget to say hello to Santa! GOLD COIN DONATION (kayaking and sailing trips priced separately)

5 JANUARY – 31 JANUARY 2015 • Planetarium shows • Minecraft activity • Rocket launching (weather permitting)

Corner Quay & Hobson Streets, Viaduct Harbour, Auckland Ph: +64 9 373 0800 • www.maritimemuseum.co.nz Open 9am-5pm, 7 days a week

BOOKINGS ESSENTIAL: STARDOME.ORG.NZ / 09 624 1246

www.familytimes.co.nz

Family Times Ad_Summer School Hols 2015_Minecraft.indd 1

19/11/2014 10:56:56 a.m.


cool activities

Entertainment Summer is in the air, and with it Sky City - Santa’s World Tour Love the Sea these ho-ho-holidays something special These school holidays the kids can get comes all the fun activities that Make at the Auckland Sky Tower! From 10am – creative transforming sea shells into the new season has to offer. 3pm, 6, 7, 13, 14, and 20-24 December 2014. treasures, take part in daily story-telling, Sky Tower admission fees apply. For more Indoors or out, there’s plenty and feed the friendly fish. From 12-23 to keep your family entertained details visit skycityauckland.co.nz/skytower. January, 9.30am – 3.30pm daily. Visit www. maritimemuseum.co.nz. this season. Here are a few Holiday specials Stardome Observatory and ideas to get you started, and Planetarium we’ve got heaps more at www. Here are some great holiday These school holidays Stardome is Making it familytimes.co.nz. Minecraft! Catch a planetarium show, watch a ideas designed to keep you rocket launch then help us construct a spaceRydges Hotel and your little ones entertained themed Minecraft wall installation. Bookings At Rydges Auckland, kids stay and eat free, and during the school break. essential. the hotel offers a kids’ games room, pool with cool inflatables and kitchenettes in every room – it’s the perfect family getaway destination!

Kids Fair

Kids Fair 2014 has everything from massive slides, a zip line (for the truly daring), obstacle courses and photo areas with your favourite fairy tale characters, to a pre-historic visitor. Visit www.iticket.co.nz.

Voyager NZ Maritime Museum Get in the holiday spirit at Voyager NZ Maritime Museum, with a festive fun day to keep the kids entertained. Kayaking, Christmas crafts, kite flying and more. On 13 December, Visit www.maritimemuseum.co.nz.

Northern Arena

The Auckland Botanic Gardens has something for everyone this summer. Explore the children’s garden, take a bush walk or check out our sculpture collection, open seven days.

The Northern Arena intensive learn-to-swim holiday programme teaches all aspects of swimming in order to enhance enjoyment and confidence in the water, as well as the skills to survive. Call 09-421-9700 or visit www. northernarena.co.nz.

Waiwera Thermal Resort

The Auckland Botanic Gardens

The Auckland Botanic Gardens

Only 35 minutes north of Auckland, Waiwera Thermal Resort has covered and uncovered thermal mineral pools, a movie pool, slides, a poolside cafe and the Waiwera Day Spa. Visit www.waiwera.co.nz..

Make the most of the summer weather and venture into the Auckland Botanic Gardens for live music on the terrace on Sundays. Entry is free.

BE A BETTER YOU!

Visit www.stardome.org.nz, phone 09-624-1246.

From waka to tall ships, the Maritime Museum has something for everyone.

5 reasons why Northern Arena says you should work out in water It’s time for you to dive in and discover the fun and challenge as you splash your way to a fitter body at Northern Arena. #5 Sleep better –Exercising in an aquatic environment improves blood flow, changes body temperature and enhances muscle conditioning, increasing your chances of a blissful night’s sleep. #4 Asthma – Swimming can be one of the best, year-round exercise options for asthmatics because it builds up the muscles you use for breathing.

#3 Builds strength and tones muscle –Working out submerged in water provides constant resistance through a full range of motion creating more muscle demand and oxygen consumption. #2 Low impact – Perfect for people recovering from injuries and those with sore joints. #1 Burn calories and lose weight – Water has greater resistance than air, which means moving in water requires more effort and burns more calories than on land.

Text “GETFIT” to 244 for more info

Standard fees apply. Terms and conditions apply.

phone: 09 421 9700 find: 8 Polarity Rise, Silverdale

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surf: www.northernarena.co.nz email: info@northernarena.co.nz

A great place to take the kids these holidays! • Indoor & outdoor hot mineral pools • Various temperatures and depths • Hydroslides (for all ages & abilities) • Poolside Café • Movie pool

Open 365 days! www.waiwera.co.nz

Phone: 0800 924 9372 21 Waiwera Road, Waiwera Just 35 mins north of Auckland www.familytimes.co.nz

13


Enviroschools sparks a new generation of green Kiwis New Zealand has built its international reputation on being clean and green. But keeping it that way is going to require a new generation of eco-warriors to protect our environment on the home front.

Enviroschools aims to spark that passion through a variety of practical projects, such as kids making worm farms, growing their own vegetables, or even caring for local wetlands, like St Joseph’s school in Taranaki. Through exploration and discovery, students develop learning and language, care and creativity, relationships and responsibilities suited to their developmental stage. What emerges is a connection with nature and a sense of belonging to the environment and community, hat’s where Enviroschools comes in. according to Anke. The Enviroschools programme is a Through these connections with the environunique sustainability journey that more ment, students then consider the world they than 950 early childhood education centres are a part of, and look at how they make deciand schools in New Zealand are on. sions to improve the physical and social enviThe Enviroschools’ network now includes a ronment of their places, community and world. combined roll of 250,000 children and young “Parents report that their children (some people – that’s about 30% of current schools as young as 3-years-old) have insisted on and early childhood centres. changes to the ways things are done at home, It’s implemented regionally, along regional for example with beginning to grow their council boundaries and is supported by a own vegetables and with regard to disposal network of people working for a range of of “waste.” Many families are now recycling, different organisations. Regional partners composting food scraps, and changing the contribute by providing funding, skilled people, products they buy to reduce packaging waste. ideas and networking opportunities. Assistance Some parents have also reported that they have differs from region to region depending on the taken these changes into their workplaces.” number and type of organisations involved. Participation from early childhood education But Enviroschools programme and projects centres has been increasing in recent years, coordinator Anke Nieschmidt says the goal is now up to 3 per cent, meaning that younger clear: to encourage a new generation to have and younger kiwis are starting to learn to a passion for their natural environment. look after their environment. In fact, the “The Enviroschools Programme is fostering environment now forms a key part of modern a generation of innovative and motivated New Zealand curriculum. young people who instinctively think and act The result is that a new generation of youth sustainably.”

T

g ri h e t h c t h e oice k am

and student leaders, now starting to emerge after 12-years of Enviroschool education, with knowledge and skills in environmental, economic and social change. That includes a great appreciation for indigenous perspectives. And, as Anke says, now they are starting to mentor others. “Students have become involved in It’s our place to care.

submission processes to councils to help protect local ecosystems, as well as presenting ideas for positive change in their schools and communities to their Boards of Trustees and principals. “Post-school youth who have been through the Enviroschools programme are stepping into leadership roles within their communities in areas such as green economics, politics and climate change action.” Keen greenie? We’ve got heaps of environment stories @ www.familytimes.co.nz.

SuperKids and Funkids Learning Centres

Geneva Healthcare

At our centres, we believe that every child is gifted in some way and that a rich, stimulating environment will allow each child to bring forth his or her own talents and abilities. Our experienced teaching team are well qualified to teach an exciting curriculum based not only on the national curriculum but also on the children’s interests and strengths. Our fun learning environment has fulltime, part-time and session-care available. For more information visit www.chuchutrain. co.nz or phone 09-271-6428.

At Super Kids &Fun Kids we offer...

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? Full time, part time or sessional care ? Aged 0-5 years ? 20 hours free ? Experienced, qualified teaching team ? Excellent teacher:child ratios • Nutritious meals ? A fun learning environment ? An exciting curriculum based on children’s interests and strengths

We believe that every child is gifted in some way and that a rich, stimulating environment will allow each child to being forth his or her own talents and abilities.

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Fun Kids Learning Centre

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23 Hollyford Drive, Clover Park

20 McKittrick Ave, Flat Bush


Tips to help you exercise through parenthood If only my advice was as easy Find a like-minded friend Find a local like-minded friend, or family as giving yourself a little pep to make it easier to arrange talk, throwing on your trainers member, exercising with them and be accountable and beating the street. But to one another. Or you could trade a day of childcare with them so you can take turns unfortunately, when you add going out to exercise for a longer period little people into your life, without any distractions. getting time to exercise can be a Snackercises! bit more of a challenge. Gone are the days when you have to do more

Make sure you are equipped

Having the right equipment certainly helps put you in the right frame of mind to exercise; the right bra (so you are supported), shoes suitable for your planned exercise and clothes you feel cool and comfortable wearing are all key. Having a suitable buggy (lightweight, easily managed, comfortable) for your wee ones is definitely a plus. If you find it difficult to leave the house you may want to look at getting some light weights, band, Swiss ball, etc. If you can’t afford equipment, there are a huge variety of body-weighted exercises you can do anywhere that are just as, if not more, important to help your body realign.

Listen to your body

You are your best doctor so listen to what it is your body needs. When our little darlings keep us up throughout the night then it’s time to really treat the soul with tender loving care and relax when possible. During this time, make sure your body is being refuelled with real whole foods so it can bounce back more easily.

than 30 minutes of exercise in one sitting to achieve results. Snackercises are small, bitesize portions of exercises done where and when it is possible. They do all add up at the end of the day. This could be a set of squats and tricep dips while the kids are in the bath or lunging down the hallway and press-ups on the kitchen bench while the jug boils. Even pelvic floor exercises while waiting at the traffic lights are classed as snackercises! Set yourself a goal for the week with how many minutes of snackercises you would like to achieve in a day and slowly increase. The rule of thumb is to make it achievable right from the beginning so you can easily turn it into a habit.

“You are your best doctor, so listen to what it is your body needs.”

Find a local fitness programme

Get out and about into your community and find a local fitness group that either has a daycare provided or allows you to bring

Have you old New Zealand or foreign money? Give it to a good cause. Did you know that there’s a large amount of unwanted money out there? Apparently, there’s approximately $80m in old coins and some $36m in bank notes plus loads of foreign cash. The Lions’ HU4K project collects everything from pre/old decimal currency and bank notes through to any foreign currency. The magic of this collection is taking something that doesn’t have much use and turning it into something really positive – life changing opportunities for Kiwi teens.

Please take your old NZ/foreign money to any Resene ColorShop or selected New World Supermarkets. It’s as easy as that! Many thanks to Fastway Couriers, Resene ColorShops, New World Supermarkets and all New Zealanders for their on-going support.

Lions Clubs throughout New Zealand are raising funds to assist our young people by collecting old NZ money and foreign currency. So dig out your old money and take it to your local Resene Color Store or ring 0800 OLD MONEY (0800 653 666). For more information about the project email our national coordinator: hu4kproject@lionsclubs.org.nz or visit our website: www.lionsclubs.org.nz/old money

fit families

your bubbas and toddlers with you (like my Little Bellies Mums & Buggy’s Bootcamp). These groups are a great way to meet other like-minded mums in your community while having fun and getting healthy.

“Snackercises are small, bite-size portions of exercises done where and when it is possible.”

Exercise your way through chores

Instead of dreading chores, turn them into your workout time. While vacuuming, work on contracting your tummy and be sure you switch arms to even out the sides. When hanging out the washing, squat down low to pick up the pegs and clothes each time. Once you get the hang of incorporating exercises with your chores you may find yourself getting through them a whole lot quicker, which should also raise your heart rate a bit more.

Play with your children

Run, tackle, tickle, roll, jump, spin, bounce, laugh with your children as it has so many health benefits not only for you but for them also. By Kelly Young Kelly is a Canterbury-based fitness and nutrition health coach and mother of two. Check out her Facebook page: Kelly Young – Nutrition & Fitness. Delicious filling for homemade dumplings or wontons. Great served with savoury pancakes. Homemade sushi or rice-balls. Added to spicy beans and Nachos. Pulled pork hotdog. Rolled into a crepe with smoked cheese and onion. Pulled pork Filo triangles served with dipping sauces. Baked potato with lashing of sour cream. Chinese style omelette filled with pulled pork. Pulled pork chilli con carne. Ultimate pork potato hash cake. Stuffed into a roll with creamy coleslaw is a classic. Wonderful soft shell tacos. Hot Asian noodle salad. Homemade pulled pork pizza. A delicious pie filler. Chinese style fried rice with pulled pork. Delicious filling for homemade dumplings or wontons. Great served with savoury pancakes. Homemade sushi or rice-balls. Added to spicy beans and Nachos. Pulled pork hotdog. Rolled into a crepe with smoked cheese and onion. Pulled pork Filo triangles served with dipping sauces. Baked potato with lashing of sour cream. Chinese style omelette filled with pulled pork. Pulled pork chilli con carne. Ultimate pork potato hash cake. Stuffed into a roll with creamy coleslaw is a classic. Wonderful soft shell tacos. Hot Asian noodle salad. Homemade pulled pork pizza. A delicious pie filler. Chinese style fried rice with pulled pork. Delicious filling for homemade dumplings or wontons. Great served with savoury pancakes. Homemade sushi or rice-balls. Added to spicy beans and Nachos. Pulled pork hotdog. Rolled into a crepe with smoked cheese and onion. Pulled pork Filo triangles served with dipping sauces. Baked potato with lashing of sour cream. Chinese style omelette filled with pulled pork. Pulled pork chilli con carne. Ultimate pork potato hash cake. Stuffed into a roll with creamy coleslaw is a classic. Wonderful soft shell tacos. Hot Asian noodle salad. Homemade pulled pork pizza. A delicious pie filler. Chinese style fried rice with pulled pork. Delicious filling for homemade dumplings or wontons. Great served with savoury pancakes. Homemade sushi or riceballs. Added to spicy beans and Nachos. Pulled pork hotdog. Rolled into a crepe with smoked cheese and onion. Pulled pork Filo triangles served with dipping sauces. Baked potato with lashing of sour cream. Chinese style omelette filled with pulled pork. Pulled pork chilli con carne. Ultimate pork potato hash cake. Stuffed into a roll with creamy coleslaw is a classic. Wonderful soft shell tacos. Hot Asian noodle salad. Homemade pulled pork pizza. A delicious pie filler. Delicious filling for homemade dumplings or wontons. Great served with savoury pancakes. Homemade sushi or rice-balls. Added to spicy beans and Nachos. Pulled pork hotdog. Rolled into a crepe with smoked cheese and onion. Pulled pork Filo triangles served with dipping sauces. Baked potato with lashing of sour cream. Chinese style omelette filled with pulled pork. Pulled porkAvailable chilli con carne. Ultimate pork potato hash cake. Stuffed all with good intoin a roll creamy coleslaw is a classic. Wonderful soft supermarkets shell tacos. Hot Asian noodle salad. Homemade pulled pork pizza. Afrom delicious pie filler. Chinese style fried rice with pulled 18th August pork. Delicious filling for homemade dumplings or wontons. Great served with savoury pancakes. Homemade sushi or riceballs. Added to spicy beans and Nachos. Pulled pork hotdog. Rolled into a crepe with smoked cheese and onion. Pulled pork Filo triangles served with dipping sauces. Baked potato with lashing of sour cream. Chinese style omelette filled with pulled pork. Pulled pork chilli con carne.

! W NE Hellers Pulled Pork. What can’t it do? For recipes and quick meal ideas check out hellers.co.nz/pulledpork

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15


Beating bed time battles There is a page on Facebook but offer choice – you can choose one teddy to sleep with, which one would you like? Or, called, “I love my kids more you can have one glass of water at bed time, do you want it before or after your story? than anything but WHOO Routine is key HOO FOR BEDTIME!”

T

hat’s parenthood in a nutshell – it can be magical and miserable, sometimes all in the same five minutes. At the end of yet another chaotic day it is every parents’ dream to tuck their children serenely into bed before blowing a kiss and heading off to enjoy some peaceful and welldeserved adult time. Unfortunately, kids often have other plans. In reality, bedtime is less like a scene from a Disney movie, and more like trying to tame a loud, overtired, unreasonable, fire-breathing dragon. Bedtime is never easy – from settling a baby, to cajoling a toddler to stay in her new “big girl bed,” to tearing an older child away from the TV – every age has its challenges. So what can a parent do to ease bedtime battles?

Keep calm

No one can stall like a kid at bed time. When your child has asked for his third cup of water, been for his second trip to the toilet, and now wants you to find the lost teddy he can’t possibly sleep without, it’s easy to lose your cool. Try to be firm but fair. Don’t get frustrated when he wants another glass of water. Include his bed time distractions in your routine so he can’t use them to procrastinate. Use limits and stick to them,

Children of all ages respond better when they know what to expect. Make bed time enjoyable and familiar: perhaps a warm cup of milk, followed by bath, toilet, then settling into bed for a story and a cuddle. Singing a favourite song together each night is a great way to signal lights-out for toddlers. If he hops out of bed, calmly but consistently keep putting him back. You might do this a hundred times, but don’t give up - consistency will pay off in the long run. Older children benefit from a few minutes of wind-down time, either reading or a doing a quiet activity, to get their eye-lids dragging. Put a clock in their bedroom to exert some independence over time-keeping.

Bed time tantrums

Bed time tantrums arise from fatigue. The best way to avoid them is to keep bed times regular – and ensure they go to sleep before over-tiredness kicks in. It is impossible to rationalise with your child when she is in melt-down mode. The best solution is to leave her in a safe place – ideally a cot or bedroom – and leave her to cry it out for a few minutes. Throwing a tantrum is hard work; when you return, she might well be ready to drift off now after a nose-blow and a cuddle.

Remember the best thing about parenthood is that no battle lasts forever. Just when you think you don’t have the willpower to wrestle your toddler into bed one more time,

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Monday 12 October to no later than Friday 18 December

suddenly she’ll conform – but next she’ll start demanding ice-cream for breakfast at 5am. Whoohoo for bedtime!

2015 secondary and composite school term dates

Term 1, 2015 Between Monday 2 February and Thursday 5 February to Thursday 2 April Term 2, 2015 Monday 20 April to Friday 3 July Term 3, 2015 Monday 20 July to Friday 25 September Term 4, 2015 Monday 12 October to no later than Wednesday 16 December

Remaining public holidays 2014 25 December 26 December

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Jenny wasn’t sure she had enough milk for her new baby. Liam was feeding a lot more than she expected him to. She was delighted when her friend gave her a copy of the La Leche League magazine, Aroha. It had mothers’ stories that reassured her that frequent breastfeeding was normal and a great way to keep up her milk supply. Jenny decided to subscribe and get Aroha every two months. You can too – visit lalecheleague.org.nz/aroha or lalecheleague.org.nz/membership.

Enabling children to... • embrace nature and celebrate our history and heritage. • develop knowledge and respect for our planet and people • gain confidence in exploring, researching and making discoveries. • be inspired, stimulated and challenged on their learning journey.

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11 Myrtle Street, Western Springs, Auckland. Ph: 09 815 3113 Email: info@sunbeams.co.nz

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Breastfeeding support in many ways Meet breastfeeding mothers ContaCt a trained breastfeeding counsellor Read a book from our library BRowse our website Join and receive aroha magazine Buy books and leaflets donate to help La Leche League help more mums like you.

CONTACT US: (09) 846 0752 EMAIL: help@lalecheleague.org.nz facebook.com/LLLNZ lalecheleague.org.nz


Is your 4-year-old school-ready? Your baby is about to start school: what do they need to know, and how can you help them to prepare for their new, exciting adventure?

F

or a start, the most important thing is you child’s health and development. In New Zealand, your four-year-old child is entitled to a free health and development check, known as a “B4 School Check.” It’s the eighth and final Well Child health check. You should be sent some forms by your local Well Child provider, which you will need to complete and return. Once you’ve done that, a specially-trained registered nurse will conduct the check to ensure that your child is healthy and can learn well at school. This includes tests for vision, hearing and immunisation, as well as a behavioural and developmental questionnaire. This is a great time to speak with the nurse about concerns you may have about your child’s health and development before they embark on their school days.

What skills should your child already have? • • • •

Do up their shoes. Go to the toilet and wash their hands. Blow their nose. Recognise when they are thirsty and get a drink of water.

• • • •

Ask for things they need. Sit on a chair at a table for short periods of time to complete an activity. Be comfortable being away from you. Know how to take turns, or is able to wait for things.

2

What do they need to know?

The more your child knows before school, the easier the transition will be. Not every child is ready for the following three points, but it’s great to at least make a start on them before school commences.

3

1 Write their own name

Use pencils, not pens. You can get them in the mood by doing lots of colouring with them, then starting to show them how to write letters.

2 Know the alphabet

There are plenty of good toys and songs that will help, but it’s not just about reciting the sounds. They also need to know the differences when it comes to writing them.

3 Count and answer number-based questions

4

in the lead up to their starting date. This will help your child become comfortable with their new surrounding, their new teacher and their classmates before they start full time. Meet the teacher one-on-one. Introduce your child and yourself, and spend a few moments getting to know each other. Your child’s teacher is going to be a big part of their life for the next year. Shop for school supplies together. Paper and pencils, erasers and crayons. Get a list of what your child will need from the teacher, and go on a special shopping trip. Let your child pick some of their own school supplies, in honour of their new independence. Reassure your child. Spend time together talking about what they can expect from school, about what will be expected of them, and about your positive school experiences.

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For example, put three potatoes on your plate, get your child to eat one and ask how many are left.

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Words of Wisdom with Diane Levy

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How do I stop my children from trying to one-up each other constantly, or is that normal?

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any of us use one-upmanship to encourage compliance. We turn ordinary requests into a competition with a sibling or with ourselves. “Let’s see who can get dressed fastest! Let’s see who is first to the table! How about a race up to bed?” All of this is well within the realms of normal - and often delightful – parenting, and if you are reading this and it is working for you, don’t change it. However, if this becomes our primary way of getting things done, if we have a naturally competitive child or competitive children, or if this is turning into everything is a competition, it is time to revise our method. Put your older or oldest child’s name on the fridge. For that day, in situations of choice, that child gets to go first or to have first choice (not on everything, just in suitable child-choice situations). The following day, put the next-in-age child’s name on the fridge and this is their day to be chooser. This method teaches children that some days they get to be the first and some days their options depends on other choices – or on being able to wait their turn. Another way children one-up each other is in declaring themselves the best, the fastest, the cleverest. Try to switch your language into their virtues rather than their achievements. Notice and admire hard work, kindness, thoughtfulness, generosity, helpfulness and consideration. By picking up on their virtues rather than their achievements, you get away from promoting competition. Submit your parenting questions and concerns to family therapist, counsellor, parenting coach and speaker Diane Levy. This

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is a regular column, so get those questions flowing! Email us at editor@familytimes. co.nz. Get an order form for Diane’s popular books via www.familytimes.co.nz. For more advice from Diane Levy, check out www.familytimes.co.nz.

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18


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Ascent Adela 2 Junior and Senior The Ascent Ascent Adela a durable black leather school shoe featuring a Mary Adela 22 isJunior and Senior JaneThe style adjustable durable grip featuring on a variety of Ascent Adela strap. 2 is a The durable blackoutsole leatherprovides school shoe a Mary surfaces, heel cushioning with shockprovides absorption Jane and stylethe adjustable strap. Thehelps durable outsole gripfrom on ayoung variety of children right and through to teenagers and adults. surfaces, the heel cushioning helps with shock absorption from young children right through to teenagers and adults.

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Ascent Eve Junior and Senior Traditional shoe with a buckle closure. Generous fit around Ascentgirls EveT-Bar Juniorschool and Senior the forefoot, but snug andschool secureshoe around heel. The Eve Generous is engineered Traditional girls T-Bar withthe a buckle closure. fit around to provide lastingbut cushioning, maintaining a solid the forefoot, snug and yet secure around the heel.and Thestable Eve is internal engineered structure. Also lasting available in brown.yet maintaining a solid and stable internal to provide cushioning, structure. Also available in brown.

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Asics GEL-520TR Black Junior BuiltAsics for court based activity, shoe provides a great option for the active GEL-520TR Blackthis Junior childBuilt whofor loves sport andactivity, needsthis a durable and supportive shoe. for the active court based shoe provides a great option Alsochild available in Pre-school with a Velcroand lace up system. who loves sport andsizes needs a durable supportive shoe.

Asics GEL-520TR Junior Built forGEL-520TR court basedJunior activity, this shoe provides a great option for the active Asics child lovesbased sport and needs durable and supportive shop. available Builtwho for court activity, this ashoe provides a great option for Also the active inchild a girls colour in and Pre-school with a Velcro laceshop. up system in both who lovesand sport needs a sizes durable and supportive Also available boys in a and girls girls. colour and in Pre-school sizes with a Velcro lace up system in both boys and girls.

Also available in Pre-school sizes with a Velcro lace up system.

Asics GEL-Fuji Trabuco 3 Junior and Senior The Asics GEL-Fuji Trabuco 3 is a shoe that and provides a supportive, yet cushioned GEL-Fuji Trabuco 3 Junior Senior and The comfortable onprovides or off-road purposes yet andcushioned is a great GEL-Fujiplatform Trabuco designed 3 is a shoeforthat a supportive, all-round school shoeplatform for those that don’t a morepurposes formal style. and comfortable designed for require on or off-road and is a great Note: Not all school modelsshoe are for available in alldon’t Shoe Clinica stores all-round those that require more formal style.

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Keen Kanyon Junior and Senior With terrific toe Junior protection is a great all-conditions sandal. The Keen Keen Kanyon and this Senior Kanyon is ready help yourthis child battle against thesandal. elements. With terrific toe to protection is ado great all-conditions The With Keena non-marking outsole, secure-fit lacing system and anti-microbial Kanyon is ready to help your child do battle against the elements. upper With a it isnon-marking the ‘go-to-sandal’ forsecure-fit children lacing of various ages. outsole, system and anti-microbial upper it is the ‘go-to-sandal’ for children of various ages.

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