Engaged - Issue 32

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GETTING THERE Wedding transport

TEETH WHITENING We let you know what’s available

PARIS

The romantic honeymoon desination

04/ 2011

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MODEL FOR A DAY

We have a winner!

DON’T BREAK THE BANK Getting a loan for your wedding

CHILDREN

Tips for having children at your wedding!


...your wonderful wedding on the cliff tops Just 50 minutes from Auckland’s CBD you’ll find magical Castaways. Castaways provides the ultimate wedding experience you and your guests will rave about for years to come. • Coastal cliff top ceremonies • Stunning sunset wedding receptions • Fabulous food • Award winning service • Guest accommodation • Honeymoon packages • Onsite activities Click here to download our new >online weddings pack<

Our team are available to meet with you onsite at Castaways. So contact us now and let’s start designing your wonderful wedding!

Castaways Karioitahi Beach, Waiuku, Auckland Ph 09 236 5161 Email weddings@castaways.co.nz Web www.castaways.co.nz * Specials Season at Castaways * April to November is Specials Season at Castaways. No minimum spends and no minimum numbers are required. Simply your wedding, your way.

“We want to thank you again for our absolutely amazing wedding. Some guests said it was the best wedding they’ve ever been to!” (Castaways Bride & Groom, 2011)

~ unique ~

~ memorable ~

~ affordable ~


Notes from the Editors...

April has been an amazing month! Not only have we had the first ever winner of our Model for a Day Competition, but we have had a royal wedding as well!

Cover Credits: Photography: Jessica Higueras from Jessica Photography www.jessicaphotography.co.nz

Advertising Enquiries: Email: info@engaged.co.nz Phone: 09 8455925 Post: PO Box 137101, Parnell Auckland 1151 Hamilton Media Limited accepts no responsibility for material provided by readers or advertisers. All material supplied is assumed to have been provided with the consent of the appropriate copyright holders Engaged is subject to copyright in its entirety. All rights reserved in material accepted for publication unless initially specified otherwise.

Firstly, we would like to congratulate Alicia Paterson, the winner of our Model for a Day competition! Alicia featured highly in the public votes as well as in the judges voting, securing her the win. We would also like to give a big thanks to everyone else who entered who made it the amazing competition that it was. We are really looking forward to seeing the editorial spread that she’ll be featured in (which should be in next month’s issue!). Lastly, the royal wedding has been dominating the news over the past few days. It was amazing to see Prince William marry Catherine Middleton, with all of the pomp and ceremony associated with such a grand occasion. We have the official wedding portrait for you to view, so make sure you check it out!

Tim & Gabrielle


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table of PARIS

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DON’T BREAK THE BANK! 102

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THE WEDDING


contents PHOTOGRAPHERS’ SHOWCASE

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WEDDING TRANSPORT

28 CHILDREN AT YOUR WEDDING

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58 MODEL FOR A DAY! WE HAVE A WINNER! 10

TEETH WHITENING 5

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The Wedding! Unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past few days, you’ll know that Prince Willam and Catherine Middleton were married on 29 April at Westminster Abbey at what was, undoubtedly, one of the most viewed events ever. With an amazing dress by Sarah Burton (lead designer at Alexander McQueen), Kate looked stunning as she married the uniform-clad Prince William. For all of the highlights of the day, you can find everything you need at the official website: http://www.officialroyalwedding2011.org (there is even a link to the official wedding YouTube channel which has loads of video footage from the day). Also, if you want to have an idea of what the dress is like in person, dress designer Jane Yeh has created a replica of the dress which is being toured around New Zealand!

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Photograph by Hugo Burnand 7

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Bride & Groom Show Sunday, 1 May 2011 - 9am - 5pm Ellerslie Event Centre, Auckland www.brideandgroomshow.co.nz

Elegant Wedding Show Sunday, 1 May 2011 - 11am - 3pm Millbrook Resort, Queenstown www.elegantweddingshows.co.nz

Wedding Exhibition, Dunedin

WEDDING SHOWS

Sunday, 1 May 2011 - 11am - 4pm Forbury Function Centre, Dunedin

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Wellington Wedding Show Sunday, 15 May 2011 - 10:30am - 3:30pm TSB Arena, Queens Wharf, Wellington www.thewellingtonweddingshow.co.nz

Tauranga Wedding & Special Events Show Sunday, 22 May 2011 - 10am - 4pm Baypark Stadium, Tauranga www.taurangaweddingshow.co.nz

Elegant Wedding Show Sunday, 29 May 2011 - 11am - 3pm Ascot Park Hotel, Dunedin www.elegantweddingshows.co.nz

Manawatu Wedding Expo

Sunday, 12 June 2011 Convention Centre, Main Street, Palmerston North www.manawatuweddingexpo.co.nz

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BEAUTIFUL DRES BEAUTIFUL PHOT BEAUTIFUL MOD

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SSES R TOGRAPHY R R DEL

WE HAVE A WINNER! TURN THE PAGE TO FIND OUT MORE 11

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CONGRATULATIONS! TO ALICIA PATERSON, W THE INAUGURAL MODEL COMPETITION!

Alicia will be featuring in an upcoming Engaged editorial photo photographed by award-winning photographer Jessica Higuera Jessica Photography) and featuring some amazing gowns from Keep an eye out in the June issue for the spread!

PS: A big thank you to all of the contestants in the competition an amazing turn out (with a huge number of votes) - testimony t many gorgeous ladies there are out there!

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WINNER OF L FOR A DAY

o spread, as (from City Bridal.

- we had to just how

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FEATURE

SMILE

Engaged’s Guide to Teeth-Whitening

Want shiny white teeth to match your stunning white wedding dress? Engaged discusses how you can get that Hollywood actress smile before your wedding day.

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There are varied teeth-whitening methods, ranging from a tube of toothpaste bought at the local supermarket to professional teeth whitening performed at your dentist. Costs and, of course, effectiveness vary with each method. Professional Teeth Whitening There are a few teeth whitening specialists who now offer professional teeth-whitening services. These treatments use a bleaching gel and a specially-designed light which activates the gel (different specialists use different types of light, for example, White Smile Parnell uses a blue light which they suggest reduces the chance of any irritation from the light). This is an excellent method of teeth whitening for sensitive teeth, as the dentist can monitor the process. It also provides immediate results and tends to get your teeth a lot whiter than the other methods. It is, however, a little more expensive. Essentially, the dentist will isolate your lips and gums and apply the whitening gel onto your teeth. The light then activates the gel, which whitens your teeth. The gel contains a pH balanced hydrogen peroxide. Teeth Whitening Trays Another option is one that you can take home with you. Your dentist takes imprints of your teeth and then makes custom-fitted trays for you to take home to complete the tooth whitening process. The trays are filled with gel that contains either carbamide or hydrogen peroxide. The strength of the peroxide may vary (which affects the whitening time

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required) and is usually prescribed depending on the sensitivity of your teeth. You tend to need to wear the trays for 2-3 hours each day for 7 to 10 days. Teeth Whitening Toothpastes Readily available, tooth whitening toothpastes contain mild abrasives to remove surface stains. Toothpastes do not actually bleach your teeth, but they are more effective than regular toothpastes at keeping your teeth whiter. Teeth Whitening Strips Also widely available, teeth whitening strips are applied to your teeth for a prescribed number of hours. They work due to the peroxide on the strips. The result will vary depending on how much peroxide the strips contain. Other Teeth Whitening Products Chewing gum, mouthwash, and dental floss are some of the newer teeth whitening products available. Side Effects Teeth may become temporarily sensitive to hot and cold food and drinks. This is caused by the gel used in teeth whitening trays, as well as by the trays themselves. Another thing to be aware of is that some over-the-counter products may wear down the tooth enamel if overused.

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Is Teeth Whitening Suitable for Everyone? We recommend that you ask your dentist before embarking on any teeth-whitening program. This is because the stains on your teeth may be due to very different reasons and your dentist will be able to assess the reason and advise on the best method for you - for example, some discolouration may be “extrinsic” (caused by food, red wine, smoking etc), or it may be “intrinsic” (caused by medications, genetic anomalies or trauma) and this may determine the effectiveness of each type of teeth whitening system. Tooth whitening is not recommended for women who are pregnant or breast feeding.

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your own unique jewellery. tom designs with delight. Beautiful wedding jewellery for eads for embellishment. you and your bridesmaids w.beadsgloriousbeads.com www.beadsgloriousbeads.com

land Tce, Kingsland, Auckland 19

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FEATURE

GETTING THERE

Your guide to wedding transport

The wedding car... often seen as an easy job that can be given to the groom to look after. In fact, there is more to choosing wedding transport than meets the eye. Not only does it provide transport for the bride to arrive at the ceremony in, it can also be one of the main ‘accessories’ of the wedding, helping to creating a certain style for the wedding.

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Today, more than ever before, there is a huge range of transport options. This month, we are purely looking at wedding cars (we’ll deal with other forms of wedding transport such as horse and carriage and helicopters in future issues).

When choosing a wedding car, there are three main things to consider: 1. Look and Feel: The wedding car should fit in with the style of the

wedding. If you are having a classic traditional wedding, you may want to have a classic Rolls Royce or Jaguar. On the other hand, if you are going for something a little more funky, you might consider a 1950s Thunderbird. 2. Practicality:

That’s right, you need to consider the practical side of the wedding car. Many people will choose to have a special wedding car only for the bride and groom, with the rest of the bridal party travelling in normal cars supplied by friends and family. Others will choose to have two or three wedding cars to fit the whole bridal party in. The other option is to have a huge limousine that will fit everyone in.

3. Price: Wedding cars can get quite pricey and you should definitely

decide together how much you are happy to spend to hire a car. This is especially the case if the groom is looking after the hiring of the car as finding out that you have just spent $1500 on a car is not a surprise that you want to give the bride! But, even if you have a modest budget (which is the case for most people), there are plenty of ways to get some amazing cars without having to spend up large (see the side box on the following pages for a few ideas).

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Cost How much you spend on a wedding cars varies depending on the type of car you rent and how long you need it for. Generally, the classic wedding cars (such as the Rolls Royce or Jaguars) cost around $200-$300 for the first hour and then lesser rates for the following hours. Many companies will have package deals for a set number of hours, especially during peak wedding season. This means that you need to think carefully about how long you will want the car for. Ideally, you don’t want to hire it for any longer than you need it, but on the other hand, you don’t want to feel rushed if you are running behind schedule. It is important to note that, especially in the height of the wedding season, many cars will be booked for two or three jobs a day, so there may not be any chance to extend your hire period if you want to on the day. Make sure that you check with the company before booking what happens if you run over your booked time as most companies will charge additional fees (such as an extra hour) if you go over. If you have a large bridal party and you want everyone to be transported in style, then it may actually be more cost-effective to hire one of the large limousines that can seat up to 16 (such as the Hummers or Lincoln Navigators). While these are pretty expensive (some of them are $700 for the first hour and $395 for the following hours), they might end up being cheaper than hiring two or three smaller cars. Plus you get the benefit of everyone riding together!


Benefits of Chauffeur-Driven There are definitely some advantages to using a company that specialises in providing cars for weddings. Invariably, the cars are set up for weddings, with ribbons and other decorations. The drivers usually know all of the venues well, so will know the best place to drop you off, turn around, etc. Then there will be the little things, like having covers to put over the wheels so that your wedding dress doesn’t get marked when you get in and out of the car. When booking your car, find out whether they allow you to have champagne in the car (which is a nice touch when travelling to your photo location) and whether they provide umbrellas in case the weather turns for the worse.

What’s Popular There is a huge range of cars available these days for hire. Here is a selection of some of the most popular: Rolls Royce Silver Cloud Daimler DS420 Limousine Bright Pink Cadillac Lincoln Town Car (1970’s style) 5. Mercedes Benz 600 Landaulet (convertible limousine) 6. Hummer Limousine 7. Lincoln Navigator Stretch SUV 8. Jaguar Mk 2 9. Porsche Cayenne 10. Audi A4 Convertible 1. 2. 3. 4.

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Tips for getting cars on the cheap Having a nice wedding car doesn’t necessarily need to cost the earth. With a bit of work, you may be able to get something pretty special without having to pay too much. Here are some ideas: • Ask around friends and family. It may be that between them a few of your friends have some luxury cars which you can borrow for the day. • Car clubs. If there is a particular type of car that you would really like to be part of your wedding, contact the local car club. Often car club members are keen to show off their pride and joy and may even do it for free (or a donation). • If you are after something more modern, such as a nice European saloon (think Audi, Mercedes or BMW), and are happy to drive it yourself, there are plenty of car-hire firms that rent them out. These are often quite a lot cheaper than the chauffeur-driven classic wedding cars. This is also a great idea if you are planning on having a honeymoon in New Zealand, as you may want to keep the car for the duration of your honeymoon. If you are just renting for the day, these may be $200-$300 for the whole day, with much cheaper rates if you rent for longer periods. • Some of the taxi companies offer a wedding service. Corporate Cabs is one that offers chauffeur-driven cars for a reasonable price.

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Boutique Wedding Venue A wonderful wedding begins with a wonderful venue.

2engaged – 8 Maginnity Street, Wellington, 6011,26New Zealand

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T: + 64 4 4741300


The Wellesley Boutique Hotel located in Wellington's CBD has an ambience which is unique. Within the classical neo-Georgian building are facilities and appointments which make the Wellesley Boutique Hotel a superb wedding venue. Elegant drapes and carpeting, monogrammed silver and crockery, antique furniture, paneled walls hung with original paintings – all create an atmosphere of elegance. But selecting the right venue is just the start. Food, wines, flowers and so many details are all important.

The Grand Dining Room is magnificently panelled in oak, whilst the high stud allows for natural light through elegantly draped windows. This room caters for up to 120 guests banquet style or 200 for cocktails.

Our Grand Dining Room, where your reception will take place, is accessed via the sweeping staircase.

At the Wellesley Boutique Hotel we never forget whose wedding it is.

E: functions@wellesleyboutiquehotel.co.nz

Choosing the Wellesley Boutique Hotel means being able to call on the skills of our experienced wedding co-ordinator, who will work with you to ensure you create a wedding which suits your personal style – and your budget.

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- Made to Measure - From $500 - Free delivery - Wide Selection - High Quality Click below to visit us now!

www.donnazuri.com Are you looking for a professional hairdresser and makeup artist who can come to you on your wedding day? With over 10 years in the industry, Natalie is working extensively in Fashion, Advertising and Film, as well as creating stunning results for bridal parties. Natalie's work is both versatile and innovative, offering her customers the complete package without compromise. Please go to my website www.natalieshields.com to view my work and prices.

www.natalieshields.com


Through the Lens

Showcasing Photographic Excellence

Photograph by VisionWorks Photography

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Amy Schulz Photography

Website: www.amyschulz.co.nz Email: AmySchulzPhotography@gmail.com Mobile: 0211556071 Wellington and Nationwide

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Suzanne McNatty - Photography by Design

Website: www.photographybydesign.co.nz Email: mcnatty@ihug.co.nz Mobile: 027 567 5990 Associate Member NZ Institute of Professional Photography Southland

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projectShot images

Award-winning wedding photography & video production Website: www.projectshot.com

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Email: info@projectshot.com Mobile: 021 685 871 Auckland


Dilworth Photography Website: www.dilworthphotography.co.nz Email: dilworthphotography@gmail.com Phone: 027 468 1865 Auckland

Greenapple Photo & Video Studio Website: www.greenapple.co.nz Mobile: 021 119 5567 Auckland

Email: wearegreenapple@gmail.com

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Amanda Wignell Photography Website: www.awp.co.nz Email: amanda@awp.co.nz Phone: 09 426 2647 Mobile: 027 615 3078 NZIPP Master of Photography Auckland and Northland (NZ Institute of Professional Photography)

Emma Hughes Photography Website: www.emmahughes.co.nz www.weddingsonwaiheke.co.nz Email: emma@emmahughes.co.nz Phone: 09 372 8729 Mobile: 021 051 3292 Waiheke and Auckland Master NZ Institute of Professional Photography

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Jodie C Photography Website: www.jodiecphotography.co.nz

Email: info@jodiecphotography.co.nz Phone: 021 323 829 Auckland & Nationwide

Victoria Vincent Photography Website: www.victoriavincent.com

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Email: victoria@victoriavincent.com Mobile: 021 213 5759 Wellington, Nelson, Nationwide

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Where The Heart Is Photography

Website: www.wheretheheartis.co.nz Email: info@wheretheheartis.co.nz Phone: 07 8547933 Mobile: 021 235 7976 Auckland, Waikato, King Country & Bay of Plenty

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Mike Hill Photography

Website: www.mikehillphotography.co.nz Email: info@mikehillphotography.co.nz Phone: 07 863 1180 Mobile: 021 507 537 Waihi, Nationwide & International Qualified Member NZ Institute of Professional Photography

Jan Maree Vodanovich Photography and Art Website: www.janmareeart.co.nz Email: jan@janmareeart.co.nz Phone: 09 236 8553 Mobile: 027 281 5921 Auckland, Franklin, Hamilton

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Backyard Studio

Web: www.backyardstudio.co.nz Phone: 021 143 7289 Christchurch

Email: info@backyardstudio.co.nz

New Regent Studios Website: www.photos.co.nz Email: info@photos.co.nz Phone: 03 355 4448 Mobile: 027 229 2329 Christchurch

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Jessica Photography

Website: www.jessicaphotography.co.nz Email: info@jessicaphotography.co.nz Phone: 09 537 5533 Mobile: 027 658 8831 Auckland Qualified Member NZ Institute of Professional Photography

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VisionWorks Photography

Website: www.visionworks.co.nz Email: tim@visionworks.co.nz Phone: 09 845 5925 Mobile: 021 44 88 17 Auckland

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Jeremy Hill Photography Website: www.jeremyhill.co.nz Email: enquiries@jeremyhill.co.nz Phone: (09) 8263394 Mobile: 021 2279196 Auckland

Vicky Broadbent Website: www.vickybroadbent.co.nz Qualified Member NZ Institute of Professional Photography

Email: broadbent@xtra.co.nz Phone: 021 633 404 Coromandel and Auckland

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It’s the day you have always dreamed of. The expensive day you have always dreamed of. So what happens when a global recession decides to mess with your plans to pay for the big day? Traditionally, brides and grooms have relied on funding from their families, although there has recently been a swing towards couples paying for their wedding on their own. However, when funds dry up in both your own account and your parents’, is it feasible to borrow money for your wedding? Many would say never borrow for anything other than a large capital investment, such as property. Others see borrowing as a means to fund other investment purchases, like shares. But what about a ‘lifestyle’ event like a wedding? We have spoken to a lot of couples who have borrowed money to pay for their wedding. There is no doubt a wedding is a major expense. But is it worth going into debt for?

Finance Options If you don’t have the money now and can’t wait for the wedding day, your options are loan finance or putting expenses on the credit card. On one hand, finance interest rates are cheaper than the interest charges on credit cards. You can also tailor the loan to suit your needs and ability to pay. However, finance loans require regular repayment – banks do not usually let you get away with just

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making the minimal interest payment, with lump sum payments when you can afford it. Credit cards are more flexible as, provided you make the minimum payments, you can pay as much off them as you can. The downside is that the interest rates are extremely high. The other option is if you already have a mortgage. Adding a bit more onto your mortgage may be the easiest way to get credit, allowing for smaller repayments. However, the old compound interest rule still applies: if you don’t pay the debt off quickly, you will end up paying a lot of interest on the loan.

Some Words of Warning In the current economic environment, lending institutions are wary of lending money that isn’t secured, for example, against you house or car. You need to check with your lender, firstly whether they are prepared to loan funds for financing a wedding. You also need to very carefully check the terms and conditions of the borrowing. Will it be secured against your house? What are the implications if it is? What are the implications of not being able to pay the loan repayments on the due dates. Think about whether you want to start your married life together with a large debt hanging over your heads. You may also want to investigate whether you can get loan protection insurance which can help pay the loan in the event that, for example, you lose your job. You will also need to think about the amount of interest that you will pay on the loan. This can increase the actual cost of the wedding dramatically.

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Do your homework. Before you take out a loan, we advise talking to a financial planner or adviser and get expert advice.

Save and Wait Right, this is where we put on our sensible pants. Bottom line: If at all possible, we advise avoiding going into debt to pay for your wedding. It may be fine putting the inevitable cost-overrun on your credit card or mortgage, however, planning the wedding with a view to borrowing for the majority of the costs is a recipe for disaster. Weddings inevitably cost more than you expect and these extra costs when you are borrowing money can really put you in a bind. For most people, we think that what it comes down to is that you need to plan a wedding that fits your budget (not the other way around). If your budget doesn’t stretch to a wedding that you’ll be happy with, wait until you’ve saved enough for it to. It may even just be a case of tweaking your spending habits (less coffee and going out on the town!) to fast-track your savings. Remember that some things are worth waiting for, especially if it is the one you love and the day of your dreams.

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INTERNATIONAL

RELATIONS Ever wondered how weddings differ in other countries? Here’s how!

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Africa: ‘Jumping the Broom’ is a tradition practiced in African cultures and refers to the bride and grooming jumping over (yes, you guessed it) a broom ‘into matrimony’. The broom symbolises the start of homemaking for the newlyweds. In South Africa, it is traditional for the parents of both the bride and groom to carry fire from their hearths to light a new fire in the newlyweds’ fireplace. Belgium: In Belgium the family of the bride takes a handkerchief embroidered with the bride’s name to the wedding ceremony. This handkerchief is then displayed in the family home, and as subsequent daughters are married, their names are added and displayed. Bermuda: A tiny sapling (tree) is added to the top of the wedding cake. This tree is then planted in the newlyweds’ garden. Czechoslovakia: No rice is thrown at a Czech wedding: instead they throw peas! China: China is rich in wedding tradition. Red is seen as the colour of love and joy and, accordingly, red is the favourite colour for the bride’s dress, candles, money envelopes and gift boxes. The bride and groom also drink out of goblets tied together with red string! Denmark:

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Brides and grooms will often cross-dress to confuse evil spirits (ok, this one just seems wrong – it’s all about the dress for us Kiwi girls!). Egypt: Good and bad traditions here: the bride’s family traditionally cook for the bride and groom during the week after the wedding so that the couple can relax, but before the wedding, the bride’s women friends pinch her for good luck! England: The English say that Wednesday is the best day to marry and that Saturday is the unluckiest – unfortunately this is also the most popular day for weddings! A spider found in the wedding dress is said to bring good luck. Fiji: A whale’s tooth is traditionally present to the bride’s father by the groom as a symbol of status and wealth. Finland: Finnish brides wear golden crowns to the wedding. After the ceremony, the bride stands in the middle of a circle, blindfolded, whilst single guests circle and dance around her. The bride then places the crown on one of their heads, which supposedly indicates which one of them will marry next. At the reception, the bride holds a sieve covered with a silk shawl. Guests slip money into the sieve, with the names and amounts of their gifts announced publicly by a groomsman.

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France: Most of us are aware of the ‘French wedding cake’, the croquet-enbouche, but the French also have some other traditions. For example, wheat is thrown instead of rice, and the guests bring the flowers and floral decorations with them to the ceremony. The French also have a special wedding cup, which is passed from generation to generation in many families. Germany: At a German wedding ceremony, the groom will often put his knee on the bride’s hem when they kneel. This signifies that he intends to ‘keep her in line’. The bride can reassert herself by standing on his foot as she rises! There are also some other very interesting traditions: after they leave the town hall or church, the newlyweds will often be given a list of tasks by their friends – these tasks are completed to show that the couple is willing and able to overcome the challenges of married life. Greece: Greeks couples wear white or gold crowns, made of long-lasting flowers or twigs which are wrapped in silver and gold paper. The crowns are often attached by ribbons to signify the tie between the bride and groom. Another popular tradition is the bride carrying a lump of sugar in her glove: it is said to ensure a sweet life. Holland: Sweetmeats called “bride’s sugar” and spiced wine called “bride’s tears” are included in Dutch wedding ceremonies. A pine tree is also planted outside the newlyweds’ home as a symbol of fertility and luck.

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India: Evil spirits are banished in two ways: the groom’s brother sprinkles flower petals on the couple and a coconut may be held over the couple’s heads as they are circled three times. Ireland: This is thought to be where the giving of horseshoes (pretty lace ones) originated, with Irish couples being presented with a lucky horseshoe to hang in their home. Italy: The sweet and bitter of life is represented by sugared almonds, which are both thrown as confetti and used as decorations at each place setting. The Italians also tie a ribbon across the front of the church door to symbolise the wedding bond. Japan: Instead of red, white is traditionally the colour of choice for bridal ensembles – although in Japan, it is not uncommon for the bride to change her attire two or three times during the day! Korea: Yellow and red are the colours of choice for brides in Korea. Koreans also believe that ducks, which mate for life, are lucky and they form part of the wedding procession.

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Malaysia: The groom arranges for lavish trays of food, currency, and paper money folded into animal shapes and flowers to be (very) noisily delivered to the bride by costumed children. At the ceremony itself, each guest is given a beautifully decorated hard-boiled egg, as a symbol of fertility. Morocco: The bride baths in milk to purify herself before the ceremony. Norway: Like other Scandinavian countries, fir trees are planted on either side of the door of the couple’s house. The trees stay there until the couple are blessed with a child. Other traditions include the wedding cake being made of bread: in the past white flour was rare on Norwegian farms so foods made with it were admired. Guests often wear the traditional bunad: a white blouse, coloured wool skirt or trousers, embroidered vest, sterling silver jewellery and a gold and silver crown with small spoon-shaped charms. The sound of the spoons clinking together is supposed to ward off evil spirits. Phillippines: One of the bridal party attendants carries coins prior to the ceremony. Following rings being exchanged by the bride and groom, the coin bearer gives the coins to the groom. He, in turn, gives the coins to the bride, who then gives them to her Maid of Honour. The passing of the coins symbolises the acceptance by the groom of his responsibility to provide support for his bride. Also symbolic are the veil and lasso. Members of the wedding party are responsible for lassoing the bride and groom, with a white satin cord draped over the shoulders of the couple as they kneel. Once they have been lassoed, a veil is placed over their shoulders to unite the couple. The bride and her wedding party all wear the same colour to confuse evil spirit.

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Russia: Russian newlyweds give the gifts, with each guest being given a present as an expression of gratitude! Scotland: The Scottish wedding cake is baked at the time of the couple’s engagement and only one tier is eaten at the wedding ceremony. The other tier is eaten in celebration of the birth of the couple’s first baby. Spain: The Spanish have a custom of giving ‘monedas or arras’: the groom presents the bride with thirteen coins as a symbol of his ability to support and care for her. The coins are carried in a special purse, or a young girl carries them on a pillow or handkerchief. Sweden: A Swedish bride puts a silver coin from her father and a gold coin from her mother in each shoe to ensure she never has to go without. Switzerland: The younger bridesmaids carry coloured handkerchiefs, which can be ‘bought’ by the guests for a dollar, which is contributed towards the couples’ nest egg. Wales: The groom-to-be would often carve a spoon from a piece of wood and that spoon would be attached to a ribbon and worn by a girl around her neck as a sign of their engagement.

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nadia couture Redefining bridesmaids. nadia couture is Auckland’s premier bridesmaid shop. Timeless design, quality fabrics and meticulous craftsmanship for the bride and your bridesmaids needs. nadiacouture garments range from soft silk chiffon to elegant formal satin, available in a wide range of colours and sizes. To compliment the dresses, nadia couture has exquisite jewellery and beautiful evening bags, guaranteeing nadia remains a ‘must-see’ destination for your entire bridal party and every evening occasion.

271a Ponsonby Road, Ponsonby, Auckland customerservices@nadiacouture.co.nz

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Phone: 09 361 1205 www.nadiacouture.co.nz

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FEATURE

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Child’s

PLAY

Engaged’s guide to having children at your wedding

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Children, especially your own, can play such an important part in your big day. Imagine walking down the aisle behind your daughter, smiling proudly as she scatters petals before you and leads you to meet the man you will marry. Or seeing your son standing in as Best Man? But what about when those little angels turn into little devils? Engaged discusses the pros and cons of children at weddings, what you need to consider, what you should provide or allow for, and how to include your own little treasures.

Child-friendly/Child-free? Whether to have children at your wedding is often a hot topic of conversation: you want to share the love with all of your friends and family, and that includes their family, but this needs to be balanced with the risk of children unintentionally overshadowing you on your big day.

The pros: Some brides and grooms can’t imagine their special day without the children in their lives. And they understand how other people can feel about including their children: kids are such an enormous part of a couple’s life; it is only natural that the parents will want to include them in everything, especially such a magical event as a wedding. Accept us, accept our kids as part of us. You may have grown up surrounded with these children: they are your cousins, your best friend’s children (who are always sleeping over at your house), even your students (for some teachers). They are a major part of your everyday life. Whilst your wedding day is a big event, it is the everyday people that make everyday life special. They rightly deserve a place in your special day.

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Children also provide some delightful moments at weddings, sometimes humorous, sometimes tear-jerking – do you really want to miss those moments?

The cons: Let’s face it: children cry, and often at the most inappropriate moment. It may be that they get overwhelmed by having to get dressed up and the ceremony associated with weddings, or they just may be tired from missing their nap time. Children have no idea that this is the most important day of your life (and frankly, they often don’t care!). They are also noisy. It is unrealistic to expect a serene, sophisticated affair complete with string quartet and quiet Pimms on the lawn when there are twenty children racing around. In groups (and sometimes alone) children love to run around, chasing each other – no getting-toknow-you small talk like adults – children plunge right into making new friends. You can expect raucous laughter and shouting combined with the odd smattering of tears as children interact and get to know each other. Older children may very well find your wedding boring. They would prefer to be hanging out with their friends. Then, apart from the way children behave or feel, there are the parents to consider…maybe they would like a night out without the children?

Decisions, decisions The best place to start is to talk to your future spouse. Discuss what you both want and your ideal vision for the day. Think about how many children you know and would want to invite (or not). Think about whether you have room at the ceremony and

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reception venues. Consider your budget. Not only do children tend push numbers up in terms of who you actually invite, there is also a need for more physical space, with all the other paraphernalia that goes with taking children anywhere. Reflect on menu changes required – your venue may provide children’s’ meals at cheaper prices - others may expect you to pay the standard cost per head for a kid that (a) won’t eat as much as an adult and (b) probably won’t like what is being served up! Once you make your decision, stick with it.

Communicate wisely If children are invited, let parents know what will be expected and available. Talk to them about how the wedding can be made most comfortable for them and their children. This will help you in the end. If they are not…well, that is often the trickier route to go down. But remember it’s your day and that there will always be a few who take offence. There will, of course, be those that will support your decision and will welcome a day and night out without the littlies. In this case, be as clear as possible in your invitations. State that it is an adults-only ceremony and reception. This gives the guests time to consider baby-sitters and so on and whether they can make it without the kids in tow.

Small things If children are invited, there are a number of things you can do to keep them happy (or, as some like to call it, distract them!). These things also keep the parents happy and make it easier for them to anticipate or deal with any outbursts if they do happen. Happy kids, happy parents, happy guests, happy you! • Politely suggest to guests with children that they sit at the back of the ceremony venue or at the ends of the aisles so that they can take 63

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the child outside if he or she starts to grumble. • Try to remember that, no matter how well-behaved they are, young children get tired quickly, especially if they have to wait around and, even more so, if they are hot (which is often the case if they are ‘dressed-up’). To prevent this becoming an issue, make sure that someone is designated to look after them the whole time and have an area set aside where they can ‘play’ while waiting for things to happen (such as waiting for the bride to arrive or while you are having your photos taken). • Take any photos involving kids early, before they run around and get grass stains on their pretty party dress or suit. • Talk to the reception venue or caterers about what food can be provided for children and let them know numbers of children so they can ensure they have enough ‘child-friendly’ food. • If the kids are a bit older, include them in the toasts by giving them non-alcoholic “mocktails” or sparkling grape/apple juice in champagne glasses. Kids who feel like they are included are less likely to become bored and will feel special and part of the day. • Let parents know what food and entertainment will be provided for the children and give them the opportunity to bring their own if they think their child would be more comfortable with that. • Provide some form of entertainment for all stages of the day. • Talk to your reception venue staff about highchairs – parents should let you know if they are required – and where those highchairs need to be placed. • Also ask the venue staff if there is a room that could be used for

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children to play in (or to nap) and also whether there are suitable facilities for changing smaller children. • Goody bags can be a great idea. Fill a bag with things to suit their age group and ability. Activity books, noiseless toys, puzzles, and with the parents’ permission, something sweet may help. • A baby-sitter, either in a room at the reception venue, someone’s house or a nearby hotel is always an excellent idea. The children can attend the ceremony and part of the reception and then be whisked away to be looked after! • And don’t forget to ask the child’s parents if they have any tips – after all, they know the child the best.

YOUR LITTLE ANGELS What if it is your little angels that you want to involve in the wedding?

Flower Girl/Bridesmaid/Page Boy/Groomsman If your son or daughter is old enough, you always have the option of including them as part of the ceremony. This may be in the role or a flower girl or page boy or, if they are a bit older, as a bridesmaid or groomsman. The flower girl or page boy will normally walk down the aisle ahead of the bridesmaids and the bride. However, depending on their age, this can be a bit tricky with the child sometimes becoming very ‘shy’ at the last minute and being reluctant to walk down the aisle. In such a case, the first bridesmaid coming down the aisle may have to take the child with them, perhaps holding their hand so it is a good idea to pre plan for this before the day.

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It is a great idea to have the children attend pre-wedding functions or rehearsals so that they become comfortable with the other bridesmaids and groomsmen. Remember, even the most confident child can get stage fright!

Ring Bearer It can be a nice way to involve your child by letting them bring the rings up to you when the time comes in the ceremony. Traditionally, a young boy is used, although these days people are less concerned with tradition. The ring bearer may bring the rings (on a pillow) up the aisle when the bride first comes in (the ring bearer is normally the first down the aisle, followed by the flower girl, maid of honour, bridesmaids and then the bride and her father). If you don’t want to entrust the rings to the child to bring up the aisle, you can just have them waiting up the front (being looked after by one of your parents!) ready for the child to bring take up to the couple when the time is right. This can be a simple way of including the child, without putting too much pressure on them. What’s more, if the child refuses to do it at the last minute, it is easy enough for the best man to come and collect the rings and take them up.

Speeches If your child is a little bit older, they might like to read a small poem that they have written (most probably with your help!). This could be at the ceremony itself or at the reception. Once again though, you have to be prepared for them to get stage fright when the time comes to stand up and do it so have a ring-in at the ready.

Include Them in Planning the Day The more you can include your child in the planning of the day, the more excited they will be about it (and we all know that an excited child is a happy child!). For, example, if you are going to

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look at venues, you can always take your child along to some of them (it may be a bit much taking them to all of the venues you look at). You can ask them what they think of the venue and, if you have chosen your venue, why not introduce them to the people who run the venue. This will help them feel comfortable on the actual day and will give them another ‘friendly face’ who they will know.

Invitations and wedding favours If you are making your own invitations, this is a great chance to get your child involved, whether by helping stick things on the invitations or putting them into envelopes for you. The same goes if you are making wedding favours – children are great at putting sugared almonds in little bags (although be prepared for a few to go astray!).

Photos Your wedding is one of the few times in your life where you are likely to have a professional photographer snapping away and you should make the most of it. Get the photographer to take heaps of photos of the kids. If you are going to a separate location for bridal party photos, you could also take your kids with you. However, make sure that there is someone to look after them in case the photos go on for a while – it pays to discuss this with your photographer beforehand to see whether it is going to be suitable. In the end it, is just a case of making sure that your child feels important and involved in your wedding day - after all, his or her parents getting married is a big deal to a kid and what a great memory it will make for you as a family.

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FEATURE

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Ooh la la!

Honeymooning in Paris

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T

he city of love, of romance, of lights. Paris. Sigh...Paris!

It is hard to know where to start when describing a visit to this beautiful city. Do we start with the iconic monuments? The myriad of museums? The beautiful parks? The food? The wine? Paris is divided into 20 arrondissements, which are numbered, spiraling outwards, from the centre of the city. In the centre of the city, is the Lourve arrondisement, which, you guessed it, contains the Lourve museum. A good place to begin!

Museums: Paris is bulging with museums. The Musee du Lourve: containing more well-known works such as the Mona Lisa and Venus de Milo, the Lourve Musuem is mind-blowingly huge. The sheer volume of exhibits and displays means that it is near impossible to make a visit to the Lourve a day-only event. If you only have one day, the recommendation is to select a particular period or section and concentrate on that, or risk leaving the Lourve frustrated about missing so much.

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The Musee Picasso: not only does it include over 3500 of Picasso’s engravings, paintings, ceramics, drawings and sculptures, the museum is also home to Picasso’s own personal collection of works by Cezanne, Modigliani and others. The Musee D’Orsay: set up in a former train station, the building itself is well worth a visit. But most visitors are there for famous works by Renoir, Monet, Manet, Gauguin and Van Gogh, to name but a few. The Centre Pompidou: famous for its ‘inside-out’ architecture, as well as it’s art. And those are just the more popular ones...

The Monuments: Of course the most famous monument of them all is the Eiffel Tower. Whilst some French call it the ‘metal asparagus’, the tower is the very symbol of Paris. Built for the 1889 Exposition Universelle (World Fair) and named after its designer, Gustave Eiffel, the tower stands at 324m high. Three levels of the tower are open to the public and the views are outstanding, not to mention the romance of the place. But not to be forgotten are the Arc de Triomphe and La Defense. Both offer stunning views of the city (and, in the case of the Arc de Triomphe, a great walk!). However, our favourite view of the city was at night, from the Basilque du Sacre Coeur in Monmarte. Take a bottle of wine, a baguette and cheese and your loved one to relax on the steps of the Basilque. Soak up the laughter and music from your neighbours on the steps and feel like you are right the real Paris as you look down upon it.

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Park life: To escape the museums and monuments, try chilling out in one of Paris’s many parks. One of the most famous is the Jardin Des Tuileries, located near the Lourve. Watch the locals as they parade through the park (and yes, the French ‘parade’ - wouldn’t you if you looked as stunning and fashionable as them!!). Or if people-watching isn’t your thing, the park also contains a fun-park section. Just out of Paris is the Chateau de Versailles and it’s gardens. Laid out in the formal French style, the gardens are famous for their geometrically aligned terraces, flowerbeds, fountains, trees, paths, and ponds.

Streets and Rivers Ahead: Meandering either down the Seine on one of the many boats or on foot down the Champs-Elysee are also a highlights.

And That Brings Us To... The Food. French food isn’t all about frog’s legs and snails (which are fabulous in pesto or garlic butter!). And whilst Paris isn’t acclaimed for its cuisine, you can buy almost everything in this city. Some highlights... There are the bread and bread products: the ubiquitous

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baguette, the croissant (chocolate and almond!), the cakes and pastries. The cheese and meat products, perfect for picnics...although we have to warn you, choosing from one of France’s 500 varieties of cheese is very difficult (great excuse to pick more than one!). And one mustn’t forget the Nutella crepes! No, we haven’t forgotten all the delightful wine to try in France. But to head into a discussion about the wine available would highjack this article! Just try it and enjoy!

Getting around The Paris Metro is fabulous. There is really no more to say, other than there is a station almost everywhere. Arm yourself with a Metro map and you’re set. Walking is also a joy. You find yourself stumbling upon cute, cobblestoned streets, right out of the last century. Or stopping at one of the many coffee shops with the chairs all facing outwards so the French can indulge in their favourite past time (which is people-watching). A wrong turn could have you facing an exquisite sculpture tucked into a neighbourhood courtyard.

The City of Romance There are so many things we haven’t mentioned about Paris. To list all the sights would take days. To truly describe the smells, sights and sounds of the city requires a visit. It really is the city of romance. It also is the city of sights and more than one visit is probably necessary to experience them all!

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GETTING MARRIED IN

FRANCE

• To be eligible to marry in France, one or other of the couple must be able to provide proof of residence to the civil service officer of the Mairie (town hall) in the town or district in which they are intending to marry. • People temporarily in France (for example, on holiday), with no fixed address or durable ties to the community are not eligible to marry in France. • Couples who meet the criteria are advised to obtain the list of documents and translations required from the specific Mairie at which they intend to marry, as requirements vary from Mairie to Mairie. • This information has been obtained from www.nzembassy. com. Please ensure this information is correct at the time of your application by making enquiries with New Zealand and French authorities. You should also check www.dia.govt.nz.

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The Checklist Engaged to 9 months before Task

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Announce your engagement, including notices in the newspaper Organise for your families to meet, if they haven’t done so already Choose your bridesmaids, groomsmen, MC, flower girls, page boys Discuss the type of wedding you want, including budget Compile a draft guest list (this will help determine venue size) Choose venues for the ceremony and reception Set the date and time for the wedding Choose and book the following: • Photographer • Videographer • Entertainment • Caterer • Florist • Transport • Wedding Co-ordinator • Celebrant Start thinking about your dress (you may need to book a dressmaker) Consider purchasing wedding insurance to cover those things that are out of your control which may result in the wedding being postponed or cancelled Have an engagement party

9 months before Task

Order your wedding dress Choose your accessories: veil, jewellery, underwear, shoes and so on Choose the attire for the rest of the wedding party as applicable: • Groom • Bridesmaids • Groomsmen • Flower girls • Page boys Select stationery including: • Invitations

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Task

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• Thank you cards/notes • Place name cards • RSVP cards • Seating plan • Envelopes Book a calligrapher Send out save-the-date cards Contact rental companies to hire equipment, marquees, tables, etc Organise gift registry Start thinking about your honeymoon

6 months before Task

Order bridesmaids’ dresses Order/book the groom’s and groomsmen’s suits Help your mother and mother-in-law with their outfits Discuss your beauty regime with your beauty therapist Book in for marriage preparation course if needed Decide on and order your wedding cake Book your accommodation for the wedding night Investigate accommodation options for out of town guests Choose and purchase your wedding rings Make any honeymoon reservations

4 months before Task

Book hairdresser and make-up artist Order favours Discuss menu options with caterer/venue, including wine selection Organise entertainment if you are having children at the reception Speak with the celebrant or minister and decide on an order of service, responsibilities, speech making, readings, etc. Set your rehearsal date Let people know if they will be making a speech, doing a reading, etc Purchase wedding gifts for each other and the wedding party Organise time off work for your honeymoon Renew passports if necessary!

2 months before Task

Post invitations Write your vows Have your hair and makeup trials (remember to take your veil etc)

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Organise dancing lessons for the first dance Organise your hen’s and buck’s nights with the wedding party Confirm: • Flowers with florist – do they fit with the theme, colours, dresses • Menu with caterer • Accommodation for yourselves and your guests Organise any legal work, for example, pre-nuptial agreements, wills

1 month before Task

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Apply for your marriage licence Confirm and finalise final guest numbers Make a seating plan (allow time for disagreements!) Have your dress fittings Organise bridal party’s final fittings (including accessories) Confirm groom’s and groomsmen’s outfits are ready Write your speech Confirm honeymoon accommodation and flight bookings Organise a house-sitter for while you are on honeymoon

2 weeks before Task

Confirm with everyone that you have booked for your wedding, advise final numbers and provide a emergency contact number to: • Venue • Caterer • Celebrant/Minister • Photographer • Videographer • Entertainment • Florist • Cake maker • Stationery • Car hire company • Hairdresser • Makeup artist • Favours • Hire company Make a list of everything that needs to be set up and/or taken to the ceremony and reception Have your final dress fitting including accessories. Take your chief bridesmaid so she knows how to how to attach your train etc.

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Make sure the bridesmaids have their dresses, footwear and accessories Have your final haircut and colour before the wedding Make sure the groom has his hair cut Finalise seating plan for reception Write place cards Practise walking around in your wedding shoes Have hen’s night and buck’s night

1 week before Task

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Pick up your wedding dress and hang it in a safe place Wedding rehearsal (you may like to give the bridal party their gifts then) Pick up hire items, including groom’s and groomsmen’s attire Confirm honeymoon arrangements Pack for honeymoon Have your engagement ring professionally cleaned Pack an emergency kit for the day Final check on arrangements and plan for the day: • Who has the rings? • Have you paid entertainers etc ahead of time or do you need to take money? • Who is taking the gifts home after the wedding? • Who is dry-cleaning your dress the next day? • Who is returning the suits? • Make sure the bridal party are aware of their roles • Give a list of important contacts to a trusted family member or friend (can be the chief bridesmaid or the mother of the bride)

The day before Task

Relax and spend some quality time on your own! Present each other with gifts and remind each other why you love the other Give wedding bands to the best man and/or chief bridesmaid to hold during the ceremony

The big day Enjoy yourself!

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