Exceptional People Magazine-November-December 2011 – Part 2

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November-December 2011

CONTENTS

Extraordinary Profiles 50

Cover Story— Dr. Deana Murphy–Helping Women Design Their Lives

56

Jose Guzman—Former Texas Ranger Scores a Home Run for Individuals with Alzheimer’s Disease

62

Donna Reed—Too Blessed to Be Stressed

Cover photo by Chuck Carter

Inspiration 70

Tamara A. Smith—Inspiring Women and Young Ladies to Live Purposeful Lives

75

Dare to Entertain Big Dreams

77

5 Tips to Stop Obsessing and Find Bliss During the Holidays

81

The Four Stages of Change

The Lighter Side 82

Those Cute Little Sprouts

84

Dear Clever Advice Columnist

85

Profile Resources

86

Writers and Contributors

Find some quiet time to think about your future and begin writing down your goals, dreams and aspirations. Review them and then begin taking action on them.

Living By Design

Deana Murphy

Helping Women Design Their Lives

Extraordinary Profiles

‘Designing for the King: From Chaos to Order by Designing Within’.

It was a pleasure to speak with Dr. Deana about her exciting transition from designing physical spaces to transforming lives.

Monica: How did you become interested in design work, “designing tangible spaces?”

Interior Design – we’re all familiar with the term and we know what it means, but Dr. Deana Murphy has taken its meaning to a new level and dimension. As a career woman and entrepreneur, Dr. Deana designs what she calls tangible spaces.

After designing tangible spaces for well over a decade and having been showcased on HGTV, Fine Living and in O Magazine, award-winning author, speaker and educator, Dr. Murphy is designing something closer to her heart. She expanded her expertise to include a tangible image and attitude for professional women. As a Life Design Expert, she’s helping women create major breakthroughs in their lives, enabling them to achieve personal accountability, emotional clarity and inner direction.

Deana: That is an interesting question, because I did not wake up one day and decide to do this. It was definitely divinely inspired. I was trying to, what I call, decorate my guest bedroom and, at the time, I lived in the Pocono Mountains. Having recently moved from New York City, I was expecting the same retail stores, and I had expected the same access to the shops that I was accustomed to in New York City. So I was trying to decorate my bedroom, and I wanted it in tranquil blue. I had this vision in my mind how I wanted this room to look but, to my surprise, I could not find anything in that community. I could not find any stores that could help me with the products that I needed, and I didn't want to travel back and forth to New York to buy them.

In 1999 Dr. Deana created the LivingDesigns™ brand based on her passion for serving others. With her practical experience and lay ministry, including a Doctorate in Theology, she has an extraordinary perspective on the inner life design process.

One day I was walking across the parking lot of a bank, and I was thinking about this room and how I wanted it to look. I heard this voice say to me, “Why don't you design your own.” It was so real that I literally stopped and turned and said, “How am I supposed to do that?” because it was such a shock to me.

She is also the author of three books, including the award-winning

I was in corporate America at that time. I was doing extremely well as a

female working in a man's environment, being the only female and the only African-American in the entire group there. I wasn't planning to give up my career. But something kept pulling at me, “Go take a course, take a course in decorating”. That was my mentality. I was going to take a course in decorating.

Therefore, long story short, I entered into college thinking I was taking a course in decorating, but they told me, “No, we don't have a course just in decorating, but we have a curriculum in architectural interior design.” So I said, “Okay, I'll take a couple of courses.” That was my thinking. Lo and behold, I did so well because I had such a great interest just for it, that I graduated on the dean's honors list, magna cum laude, and the rest is history. And soon thereafter, I was asked to be featured on Home and Garden Television within, I guess, a two-year span after I graduated.

It's been a little over a decade that I've been actually doing interior design work, and I do enjoy it.

Monica: You've been featured on various television shows and also in magazines, including O Magazine, and it's amazing what you have accomplished just based on a thought you had a few years prior in terms of decorating your own place. How did you transform that idea or your talent and skills for designing tangible spaces into helping women design their lives?

Deana: It's a two-fold answer. First, in designing homes, you build a relationship with your client. In speaking with many of them, I discovered that

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a lot of the things that was going on in their lives and in their home environment was based on the way they were thinking, and their focus was somewhat skewed.

Sometimes you get an affinity for them, and you want to share your suggestions, your ideas, and I began doing that. Once I started penning my book, Designing for the King, I realized there is definitely a direct correlation in the way you think and the way you live in your home apart from just designing it.

I realized that after the book was published and to be honest with you, someone just literally said to me, “You are a life designer. You are telling people how to design not only their homes, but their lives.” And I said, “I never thought of it that way.” It kind of fell into my lap.

I kept hitting a wall because I wanted to write a traditional interior design book and tell people how to make their spaces functional and beautiful, but it wasn't working for me. I started implementing the mindset into the manuscript and how they could change their minds and change their lives. I started talking to people and encouraging them. And people would tell me, “Oh, you made me really feel better. I didn't see it that way,” and the rest is history. This is really how I transitioned into the intangible side of design. The tangible side is still much alive.

I still really enjoy doing that.

Monica: As you mentioned earlier, you like to employ what you call “spiritual secrets” for a personal growth process. What is the approach that you take when you're helping people design their lives?

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Deana: As a Christian woman, I love the word of God and love the Bible, so I just take the principles that I've learned in the Bible that work for me. And I may share them with you or my client, but I may not quote that scripture. I just make the principle practical and apply it in practical layman's terms and share it with them.

Of course, if the client is spiritual and is a Christian and receives that, the word that I share with them, then I would just tell them, “The Bible tells you to do this or that, and this is how you apply it to your life and to your home environment.”

Monica: Do you target a specific group of women or just women in general?

Deana: I attract mostly Christian women, and I believe that would be my target, primarily the Christian professional.

Monica: You have a lot of things that you have accomplished over your career, and you're also an educator. You have also earned a doctorate in theology. How did that come about?

Deana: Again, I didn't wake up one day and say, “Oh, I'm just going to get a doctorate in theology.” It was a minister in my church actually who had spoken a prophetic word into my life. She was sort of mentoring me to a certain degree. She said, “I really feel that you need to get more wisdom,” and I received that because we all need wisdom.

Living By She introduced me to Chesapeake Bible College and Seminary. So I wasn't thinking on that level at that time. I researched and interviewed with the dean. It was a course where I would have to travel to the location. I was in Pennsylvania, and the college was in Maryland, about a threehour drive. I did do it on weekends, and I began enjoying it. They would mail the corresponding courses to me if I couldn't get there. They made it very convenient for me.

Extraordinary Profiles

And as a result of doing that, I can see that it was God's plan because in being a life designer and helping people to change their lives and make their life more balanced and give them harmony -- the same principles that I use in interior design I use in life design. The theology background really anchors that. I didn't realize why I was doing this, but now I know God had a larger plan, so that's how that evolved, and I got my doctorate.

Monica: As a life design expert, how do you measure your success?

Deana: When a client tells me that their life has changed -- when a client tells me, “I wish I had thought of this, I wish I had known this sooner,” or when a client tells me, “I'm a different person,” because I helped make their life easier, that’s how I measure success. I helped make their life more significant. I’ve opened their eyes to help them see that they were created for a specific purpose and that regardless of your circumstances, your environment, or what you have come up against, you can create significance in your life.

Monica: Do you consider what you do, as a life design expert, a form of coaching?

Deana: Yes. Part of it is coaching; part of it is consulting. There's one part when I'm just going to pull everything out from under you to let you stand on your own two feet. Then there's a part of me that will tell you, “This is what you need to do.” It's more like coaching and mentoring, I would say.

Design

Monica: What is your perspective on life?

Deana: My perspective on life is that there is no limit. People say the sky is the limit. I don't believe that the sky is the limit; I believe that there is infinity. I don't believe there is a limit to what a person can do. And I believe that as long as the mindset is prepared and designed and tweaked to understand that you are a child of God, then, through him, you can do all things. That's my perspective. I can do anything that I set my mind to do.

Deana: If you can monitor what you feed your mind -and granted, our minds are shaped by our environment,

our upbringing and society, there are still ways that we can live on purpose. I call that purposely thinking -- on purpose shape that mind and transform it to create for you whatever you want.

Of course, I follow this principle, which is found in Romans 12:2, “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”

And that is based on renewing your mind to the word of God. But again, you can renew your mind on practical things using the same principles from the spiritual world.

The mind is so powerful. I'm not a superwoman, and I don't claim to know everything, but I know that I stand today because I transformed my mind. I used the power of thought and my mind and my mouth by speaking what I believed I wanted to happen.

Monica: I often say that the mind is an intangible source, and it will allow you to conceive ideas of gold and greatness, but you have to change your mindset.

Deana: Yes, absolutely. And I'm just thankful that in spite of what I have endured, there's always a lesson. I think that is because now I can help others and have them come through their debilitating situations and create new things.

It's wonderful.

Monica: What advice can you give to women about following through on their dreams. Many of them have dreams, they have a vision, but they don't know where to start. They're afraid that they're going to fail.

Deana: First of all, what do you want to do? If you don't have a target, you don't know what you're shooting at. First November-December 2011 | Exceptional People Magazine | 53

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discover what it is you want to do. Sit down quietly with a pen and pad and write down, “My life's desire.” Write your life script. Put everything down that you desire.

Don't be afraid to dream big.

find someone to support your dream, then they should not be in your circle of influence. I would advise them to just remove themselves because you only have one chance at life.

Dream outside of your comfort zone. For example, you might say “I want to own a jet.” Well, write it down. “I want to be able to not have to go through the airport and take my shoes off.” Find the pain, and then find the pleasure to it and write it down. That's how you go from one extreme to the other. Take those thoughts and program your mindset. I believe in journaling. Journaling is one of the most powerful tools that you can have. Each day revisit that.

Monica: That's true but if you want to be able to move forward and focus on those things that you want to accomplish for yourself and for others, then you have to decide what you are going to do to separate yourself from the negativity.

I would tell them to get that vision board. Cut out pictures in a magazine, whatever it takes, and put them on your vision board. I have something like a 20x15 frame where I have my visions pasted on it. Do that and look at it every day, and just visualize it because you have to apply your five senses.

If, for instance, you want to be a baker and you have a dream to own your own bakery, smell that bread every morning. Take your mind where that place is and engage the sense of smell. Engage the sense of touch. How does the dough feel when you are kneading it? What does it look like when it raises? You're engaging all five senses.

You hear the sounds of the food being placed in the pan.

Whatever it is, you engage the five senses. Visualize the movie running over and over in your mind.

Naysayers will always tell you that you can't do it.

You're going to have to show tough love. If you can't

Deana: You see, Monica, it goes back to my core which I call my six Ds. How much do you desire that? Then you have to apply discipline, determination, diligence, and dedication. You have to make the decision that this is my life.

This is my life story. I'm writing the script for my life, and I choose who I want to be the characters in my play.

It's all about mindset. You have to discover who you want in your circle of influence, then each and every day you have to be diligent and dedicated to verbalize it and confess it. There's three Cs that I talk about. One is to comprehend it in your mind, understand that this is what I really want to do. Then you have to conquer. You conquer it by being diligent each day and take at least 15 minutes a day. We've all got 15 minutes. Just stare at your vision board. Let that movie run in your mind. Conquer also means to take action, because you can sit here and stare from here to eternity. If you haven't stepped out to do anything, your dream will not come true. You have to act on it. Stepping out may mean going to the library and doing some research, or going to conferences, or going to buy books to read about it. Go places where you can get more information about what you believe your dream is.

The third C is to confess. You have to confess.

You have to talk not only to yourself, but talk to other people.

At this point when you confess and talk to other people, you won't feel fearful and limited to share, because you'll be talking to your circle of influence, people who want to go where you're going.

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September-October 2011 | Exceptional People Magazine | 63

Jose Guzman

Former Texas Ranger Scores a Home Run for Individuals with Alzheimer’s Disease 56 | Exceptional People Magazine | November-December 2011

Extraordinary Profiles

Guzman says, “This is a personal journey to honor my mother Maria Mirabal Guzman, who died from this terrible disease. It’s my desire to help families care for their loved ones in their own home as long as possible. A secondary goal is to help improve Alzheimer’s facilities, making them a place where families feel their loved ones will be cared for with compassion.”

As a former major league pitcher for the Texas Rangers, Jose Guzman has had more winning games than one might imagine. He’s thrown hundreds of curve balls and has also received many of them from his on-field opponents as well.

Guzman began his career as a successful pro ball free agent with the Texas Rangers in 1985 when he was 22 years old. For the next three seasons he won 34 games and pitched over 200 innings twice. Overall, Guzman compiled an 80-74 record in 193 major league appearances with the Rangers and Chicago Cubs.

Years ago, life threw his mother a curve ball that changed her life and ultimately Guzman’s perspective on life. His mom suffered from Alzheimer’s disease, but her suffering was not in vain. It inspired Guzman to make a difference in the lives of other elderly individuals who suffered from the disease. He started a charity foundation, the Guzman 23 Foundation. The mission is to provide financial assistance to those suffering from Alzheimer’s disease and their families or loved ones when finances or basic insurance is unavailable.

His vision is to also have an impact on the lives of families by visiting them to understand their needs from a more personal perspective.

Intrigued by his story, the founder of Exceptional People Magazine was inspired to learn more about Guzman’s commitment to help the families of people suffering from Alzheimer's disease. Guzman also shared insights concerning what baseball has taught him and what he has accomplished as an individual. Today, Guzman is a Spanish-speaking analyst who broadcasts for FOX Sports Television.

Monica: Tell me about your childhood, what it was like growing up and what inspired your interest in baseball.

Jose: I grew up in Puerto Rico in a very small town named Santa Isabel, and I grew up pretty much playing on the streets. There was a big restaurant in my neighborhood, and we used pick up all the old paper cups that had been thrown in the trash. With those paper cups, we made baseballs.

For a bat we would use a wooded stick. And that's how we pretty much grew up, playing baseball in the

street. As we got a little older, I started playing in little league in my hometown. It was a lot of fun. I was the youngest of six brothers and one sister, so all my brothers played baseball, but they never played professionally.

My dad always used to tell me, “This one is going to make it to the major leagues.” So he planted that seed in my brain. I always thought, “I'm going to be a major league player.” So just for fun I used to throw the baseball against the wall, thinking that I was pitching against major league players.

I would think, “Okay. I'm throwing it straight to Reggie Jackson.” I was about 12 when I was doing that.

When I got to the major leagues in 1985, I actually got the chance to face those guys.

I always had a positive attitude, not only a positive attitude, but I always had dedication. I was always in the park, practicing throwing the ball. I always listened to the coaches, and I always tried to pick up something that would help me get to the next level.

Monica: At the age of 22 you actually had the opportunity to become a part of major league baseball. Do you recall at that time, at such a young age, what that meant to you and how it felt to participate in a major league sports game for the first time?

Jose: When they first told me, I was in Oklahoma City, and we were in the finals. And I remember pitching a very good game in the finals. And they called and said, “Well, you need to pack. You're going to the major

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league.” I started to look behind me thinking, “Is this guy talking to me?”

I was so excited. Then coming to the major league -- that’s pretty much everybody's dream. Through all my years in the minor league, you would see so many guys who got signed and many of them released. They could not make their goal and get on the mound. Since 12 years old was always thinking about being there. I can tell you there was an unbelievable feeling and thanking God for giving me the talent and not getting hurt.

I've was able to reach my goal to play in the major league.

lieve you should be humble and treat people the way you want to be treated.

Monica: It's great that you are passing your blessings on to other people.

Jose: Exactly. It has taught me to be good to people, to stay humble and to learn from others. I’ve learned to be a great human being.

Monica: I'm sure as a professional sports player you encountered some failures and some disappointments.

Monica: You've had an amazing career as a baseball player with the Texas Rangers. What has the game of baseball and being in pro sports taught you about yourself and what you can accomplish?

Jose: What baseball did for me was it allowed me to accomplish my dream.

But not only that, I can say that was pretty much all my life. I got to play into my late 30s. It helped me learn a lot about the people I played with and people in general. You meet happy people; you meet people that are angry all the time. You can meet all kinds of people. It really shows you how to appreciate life. You see guys that have great careers and then you see guys that never make it, or they make it for one year and then disappear. You really appreciate your team and the game and how it teaches you to appreciate things in life. Baseball really showed me how to appreciate people, my team, the game and life.

Some people play ball, and they really don't appreciate it. Playing baseball has also taught me how to give back, and that's what I'm trying to do now.

Regardless what you get from baseball, whether you started as just a baseball player, or a superstar, I be58 | Exceptional People Magazine | November-December 2011

Would you mind talking about a few of them and how you overcame them?

Jose: Sure. At the end of the 1998 season, my arm was starting to bother me. Then in 1989, I had surgery on my shoulder. And then two years later, I can say that was the worse time of my baseball career and the best. The worst was in 1991. After I worked so hard to come back from my surgery, I was released by the team. They let me go because the team didn't feel that I was able to help them because my arm wasn't 100 percent.

By then I was married, I had my first child, and the first thing that came into my mind was, “What I'm going to do now?” It's not like I signed up from college and I have my degree. I signed up from high school. I didn't know what to do. I wasn't disappointed because I was giving everything I had. I was just afraid and didn't know what to do.

So, while being very disappointed and not being able to make the team, they called me back in May, and I accepted and I had one of my best years. So, from being released in April and to come back in May in that year was amazing. I was selected as the comeback player of the year in the American League.

That showed me that even though you experience disappointments in life, you cannot give up. You make it happen. You just have to stick with it and believe in yourself.

Monica: When others see you working hard at fulfilling your dreams and positively dealing with your adversity or your circumstances, it inspires them to do the same.

Extraordinary Profiles

Jose: Yes. When I was released, I could have said, “I'm done. I'm going to go.” What would have happened if I had not been given another chance?

That is why I try to encourage kids. I tell them, “When you have a goal in mind, it's going to be hard, and you have to learn from that to become a stronger person, so just stick with it.”

Monica: Oftentimes kids are very excited when it comes to sports, whether it's baseball, football, basketball or some other sport. How can you get them to understand that there will be challenges in life and not all of them will be able to become a professional ball players?

Jose: It is difficult sometimes. I think parents sometimes get too involved in pushing the kids just to play hard. They're pushing the kids and looking at things from their viewpoint.

Let's say I'm 40 years old, and I'm teaching my kid who’s fifteen. I'm teaching him from my point of view.

Kids have to come down and see things from their perspective. Parents don't teach their kids about building a foundation, not only in regards to baseball, but whatever they choose to do. They need to help prepare them for what they will encounter. Oftentimes, there may be a kid who's a superstar in high school but when he gets to college, he’s among other superstars from other high schools. So now he’s facing the same type of players -- players at his level or even better. Young kids need to be taught how to handle these types of situations.

I encourage them not to become intimidated but to learn from others who are better at playing the game.

Pick up their habits and try to improve their skills.

Monica: Can you talk about your organization, the Guzman 23 Foundation? I understand it's meant to benefit people with Alzheimer's disease.

Jose: Yes. My mom passed away from Alzheimer's three years ago. I have played, attended, or participated in a lot of events, and I never see anything for Alzheimer's. I always see events for cancer, or AIDS, or other types of diseases, but never for Alzheimer's. I remember how my sister struggled with my mom. She had to give up her job to take care of my mom for five years. And this year in March, I decided I wanted to start a foundation for Alzheimer's, but I didn’t want to do something just for one time. I wanted to create something that would be available nationally. I want to do the best I can and, God willing, whenever it's my time, somebody behind me will keep it going.

I would like to be able to travel to visit with families and give them a check for their family member. If they need a facility, then I want to participate in getting the Alzheimer's patient into the facility, or assist them in getting a nurse or obtaining medicine. I want to be there to talk to them and be able to share some of their stories with other people.

Monica: I like the fact that you want to become personally involved and meet the individuals. How will you find these families that have parents who are suffering from Alzheimer's?

Jose: Currently, it's local, but I’m working on spreading the word through the website, www.guzman23foundation.org which is still in progress. I’m looking at other ways to make people aware of my efforts and how I can help them and their family member who suffers from Alzheimer’s. Donations can also be made through the website. If anyone wants more information about it, they can send me an email, and I will receive it directly and respond within a couple of days.

I started the foundation in May, and I did my first golf tournament. I’ve learned a lot from my family. I’ve studied and researched how other diseases have decreased by about three percent and Alzheimer's has increased to about sixty-five percent. I want to help families with loved ones at home who cannot afford to take them to a facility, or if they can remain at home, provide help by having a nurse come in. I also want to help with medicine, or help them put their loved ones in a facility. I want to plan various events to raise money to help with research, because right now there’s nothing that can slow down Alzheimer's, and there's no cure.

Monica: For the past several years you were a radio broadcast analyst for the Texas Rangers, and now you are a broadcast analyst on Fox Television?

When I help families, I not only want to give financial support but I want to help on a personal level. I want to see who I'm helping. I want to be there for them personally, because I saw what my sister went through.

Jose: Right now my vision is my Alzheimer's foundation. My vision is take it to a level where we can have Alzheimer's day and everybody wears purple. If it's a baseball game, the guys will be in purple. I want to enlighten people and let them know that it can happen to anyone.

Jose: Yes. These are broadcasted in Spanish.

Monica: What is your vision for your future?

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My goal is to get people talking about it and to recognize the fact that it can affect them too. Hopefully, one day we will find a cure. If we don't find the cure, at least we can find something to slow it down.

he's holding out for awhile. That's does not mean he’s denying you.

He’s just delaying it for awhile to test your strength and faith. You'll become a stronger person for it.

Monica: What is your overall view of life based upon all of the experiences that you've had?

Jose: In my opinion, we often forget where we came from. We don't cherish life, and it seems that people don't care anymore. I see people who are well known, they're secure, and they look down on other people sometimes. So my overall view is that everybody should look at each other the same, regardless of religion or background, and help each other. If we can do that, life will be so much easier.

I’ve always said, “God never denies.

God sometimes just delays things a little bit.” You may often hear people say, “Why me,” or, “What happened?” God watches over you, and 60 | Exceptional People Magazine | November-December 2011

Donna Reed Too Blessed to Be Stressed

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with her children led her to turn her talents into a flourishing business.

“As a Christian woman, I know that I am 'Too Blessed to Be Stressed!' and every time I was down to nothing, God was up to something. So I would pray for strength and guidance and move on,” Reed says.

From adversity comes wisdom. From wisdom often comes a passion for positive change.

Donna Reed has experienced more adversity than many of us can imagine, but despite adversity her love for helping others has not been diminished. “ have always enjoyed helping others and working with my hands, creating unique and useful items. The path to my current success has been far from smooth. Many times selfdetermination and perseverance have had to substitute for money and resources,” says Reed.

Today, Reed is an author, artist, motivational speaker, businesswoman and minister.

She was once a battered wife who escaped the horrific clutches of domestic abuse. As a 23-year old single mother, Reed experienced a defining moment that gave her the courage to change her circumstances. She enrolled in college and began using her creativity and talent to create arts and crafts. Her desire to spend more time

From that milestone, many more wonderful milestones have occurred in her life and the lives of her four daughters and the communities they serve.

In 1996 God gave Donna a vision for her four teenaged daughters to create a product line called T-Bags. They began to design tote bags and because each girl's name begins with the letter T (Taneka, Takeshia, Tajuana, and Tianda), they called them T-Bags.

She is co-founder, with her daughters, of T-Bags, Teach Boys And Girls Success, Inc. (TBAGS, Inc.).

Though they are no longer teenagers, Reed is continuing to build character through her daughters who run TBags, an organization that teaches atrisk youth to develop skills and talents to create a successful life with an emphasis on entrepreneurship and family.

In 2007 Minister Reed joined Antioch Missionary Baptist Church under the leadership of Pastor Donnie R. Garris. She served as youth minister until she was ordained to become the pastor of New Perspective Community Church in 2009.

Reed is also a life coach and motivational speaker. She inspires others to

change their circumstances by looking within themselves and recognizing their God-given talents. She shared her inspiring and extraordinary story with the publisher of Exceptional People Magazine.

Monica: You were a victim of domestic violence. How long did you endure the pain of domestic abuse?

Donna: About four years. He was 18 and I was 19. We got married and neither one of us knew anything about being a husband or wife. We had fun but when it came to the seriousness of a relationship, he couldn’t handle that part of it.

When it came to making decisions, if he couldn’t handle something he would just start swinging. The first time he ever hit me was when my mother and my sister were visiting me.

I had said something about taking the car and picking him up later. I’m not sure what was going on with him that day, but all of a sudden he didn’t want me to take the car. He got so mad that he hit me and I was in shock. I couldn’t believe it.

He apologized and of course I accepted it and we moved on. Then it was several months later that another incident occurred, then fewer months, until it got to the point where he was abusing me all the time.

I would always try to reason with him and ask, “What would make you do this?” I was trying to reason with somebody who was unreasonable.

Again, as someone who didn’t know

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how to deal with reality, he would just start throwing punches.

Years later it had gotten so bad especially when he came home for work.

If he wanted to stay out with his friends, he would start an argument and fight with me so that he could stay as long as he wanted. Even when it got to the point when I’d say, “I’d prefer you to be gone”, that would make him mad.

It had gotten so bad that my body would start shaking around 4:00PM everyday because that’s the time he came home from work. I didn’t know what was going to happen.

One day, I was washing dishes and I just started crying into the dishwater, and then I heard my mother’s voice from almost five years ago when she said, “Donna, marriage is not going to be a bed of roses, but if he ever begins to treat you bad, you take it as long as you want to take it. Then don’t take it anymore.”

That day, I looked into that dishwater and I said, “This is it. I’m not going to take this anymore.” I began to plot and plan to leave him and it took me about eight months to devise a plan to leave -- to save up the money. One day he left for work and if he had looked in his rearview mirror, he would have seen the entire neighborhood coming to help me get out. I left that day.

I wrote a book called ‘Life is a Puzzle Until You Find the Missing Pieces’. I called that chapter, ‘Three Babies in a Truck’ because I literally got on the front seat of a 17 foot truck and drove from Texas to Connecticut to my parents. It took eleven days. I stopped in Nashville, Tennessee and told his parents, “I just left your son.” My father-in-law looked at me and said, “Darling, you’ve got so much going for yourself. Don’t ever look back.”

Monica: Were your parents aware of the abuse?

Donna: They were aware of me having a different mindset and mentality than he did. They knew that I wanted something positive in my life and he was all about living “day by day” and nothing really mattered. They were aware of some things, but just not how bad it had gotten.

Monica: There are women who don’t have the strength or courage to leave their abusers. What words of encouragement can you give them to help them make the right decision?

Donna: The first thing is, you deserve more and you are more. You’re more than who they say you are. People will say, “Well, you can’t do any better. You’d better stay because you can’t afford to leave.” You have more people encouraging them to stay, than you do encouraging them to leave. But, when they do encourage them to leave, they just tell them to “get out of there”. They don’t offer an option or inspiration for what’s going to happen next.

My message of encouragement is that you are more than what you are going through. You will make it but you have to take that first step to get out.

If you stay, you won’t ever realize that things will work out.

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Extraordinary Profiles

At that point, the scripture Jeremiah 29:11 came to me. “For I know the plan I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” At that point, I knew He would not send someone that would harm me mentally, physically or emotionally. What women have to know is that the plan for your life is not for you to see harm but it is for you to have a blessed future.

I entered another relationship and this relationship was with me being in ministry. Of course I prayed and I just knew without a shadow of a doubt, that this was it. I got into this relationship and this person was mentally and emotionally abusive. I had never experienced that before. Of course the emotional abuse comes with the physical abuse, but the mental abuse, I had never experienced.

For years I had been encouraging women but because I was strongminded and strong-willed, I did not realize how bad it could tear down your mindset. I didn’t think I had a way out of this relationship because I was in the ministry.

At times, I wasn’t sure which one was worse, the physical abuse or the mental abuse. You can see a punch coming, but mental abuse will, little by little eat away at you like a disease. It stays with you until you are so full of the disease that you don’t see a cure.

So, you have to change your mindset and say “I don’t deserve this,” and you have to believe it.

Once I got out of the second abusive situation, I knew then, without a doubt that there are women that will stay, thinking that things will get better. I thought it once myself. I learned there was a difference between the world’s way and the Word’s way and by Word’s way, I’m talking about being a Christian. I thought I had to stay, because God hates divorce. However, this person broke a vow by mentally and emotionally abusing me.

How I saw my way out was I asked God, “What do you hate more, the divorce or the fact that I can’t minister the Gospel.” In other words, I can’t minister the Word because I’m about to do something that is the opposite of what you love.

I had three babies and I had no idea how I was going to feed them the next day, never mind their future. But, I was determined that I would not be a statistic. I was determined no other person would ever harm me again nor my children. At that point, I stepped away from it and there was not one day where our needs weren’t met.

Were there days when I didn’t know where we were going to get the next meal? Yes, there were, but there never was a day that my kids didn’t eat.

So, I encourage women take that step because more damage will be done if you stay. This is something that I definitely want to make clear. If you have children and you stay in an abusive relationship, they are going to allow and do what they see. Young girls will allow themselves to be abused because they saw you get abused and you didn’t leave. Boys will become abusers because they watched their mother get abused and she didn’t leave. So, if you don’t have the motivation and courage to leave for yourself, you’ve got to have it to leave for your children.

Monica: When you were in the first abusive situation were you working then?

Donna: No, I was not. I didn’t know what was going to happen. I just

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Extraordinary Profiles

knew that it was not the life I had planned for me. I never thought my kids would be without a parent. But then I had to look at it a different way.

One of us would eventually kill the other because I’m not going to keep being hit without swinging back one day.

When I arrived home at my parents in Connecticut, I immediately got a job, but the job wasn’t enough to pay the baby-sitter. My children were nine months, one year and two years old when I left him.

At this point I was getting ready to go on welfare. That was the last resort. I had never been on welfare and never knew anybody on welfare. It was embarrassing for me and I didn’t want to embarrass my family.

I told my sister I don’t know what else to do, it’s my only option. She said to me, “I pay taxes and I feel better about paying my taxes knowing where some of it’s going. Do what you have to do.”

I got on welfare and no one knew. I would deposit my check into the ATM machine. This was almost 30

years ago. I would write checks or pay cash for everything. I would buy food once a month. In the middle of the night I would go shopping at a 24hr grocery store because I was that embarrassed about being on welfare.

During the week I would make crafts and go to college and on weekends do craft shows. My kids would be under the table and I would conduct business above the table. People thought I did crafts for a living. I would apply for grants and do whatever I could to survive. That’s how I paid for my car. As soon as my oldest child began attending school, I got a job. There was a young lady who would baby-sit for me, and I did the same for her so there was no exchange of money. That’s how I made it.

Monica: You made a powerful decision to leave both situations and you turned your adversity into a strategy for freedom and success.

Donna: Yes. You’re absolutely right. I was determined that neither myself nor my children would be a statistic.

Monica: After experiencing so much adversity, what would you say was the most important life lesson you learned?

Donna: You can do anything with the right mindset. Determination will take you places that money and resources can’t take you. I was so determined to make it and ‘no’ was not an option for me. As a matter of fact when I would hear ‘no’ and even today, it gives me a source of energy. It motivates me.

Monica: While your daughters were growing up and even today, what are some things that you are passing on to them about women who find themselves in abusive situations?

Donna: All of my girls are motivated, determined and giving. They believe in helping others. They’re the ones who started the organization, Teach Boys and Girls Success, TBAGS, Inc. They’re the ones who said to me, “There are so many kids that need what we have.” Even though we were single, we never wanted for anything. Even though daddy was never there, we never needed anything.

Monica: You’ve always had a talent for creating unique crafts and so you

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transferred talent that to the business.

You’re the co-founder of TBAGS, Inc. Donna: Yes, the business was a vision that God showed me. When the vision of those two stick figures on a tote bag came to me, I said, “Girls this is something for you all.” So, I made them do thirty bags for a conference we were getting ready to do for another item I used to hand make. They sold out the first day of the conference.

That’s when they caught on to the vision.

Donna: We have a summer camp every year, and we’ve helped them develop their individual skills and talents with an entrepreneurial emphasis. So, when they come in the door, we focus on what it is they like to do. Then we teach them how they can develop that through a business or at any level of success they want to reach.

Monica: Over the years, how many young people have you helped?

Even today, I have boys that will call me and say, “Ms. Reed, I want to thank you for not shutting the door on me and for encouraging me when I was at your house.”

Donna: We’ve done the summer camp for about two years, so it’s been about fifty young kids. We also do a tea party once a year and that’s when we deal with just the young girls. It’s a phenomenal tea party. We teach them everything. We have them for a full day and we treat them like princesses. They learn what it means to be whatever it is they want to be.

They learn they are beautiful and lovely. We dress them up, serve them in a style they’ve never seen before, and we pamper them and do their nails. Most of all it’s about instilling in them the fact they can be anything they want to be. Each year we have about 30 to 40 girls.

Monica: How long have they been running the business?

We average about one-hundred kids a year and it’s growing.

Donna: Fourteen years. When they were in their twenties they wanted to start giving back and they started asking me what they could do with younger people. We came up with the same concept of utilizing their skills and talents. We then, over a two year period put together a program and became a non-profit organization and started doing summer camps and other programs.

Monica: How are you funding the organization right now?

How I kept them close to me, was by utilizing their individual skills and talents. And that’s what kept them interested in growing the business.

When young boys started knocking on the door at this point, I would open my door to all of them. I didn’t care what they looked like. I knew I could have a greater influence over them than I wanted them to have over my kids.

Monica: What type of programs do you offer through the organization?

Donna: Right now it’s through our T-Bags products.

Monica: Can other individuals donate or contribute?

Donna: Absolutely. They can contribute through our website: www.teachboysandgirlssuccess.org Monica: You help run the organization, you are also a minister and you

travel. How do you balance work and life overall? How do you find time for yourself?

Donna: What I do doesn’t seem like work. I love everything that I’m doing so it’s hard for me to see it as work. I look at everything we do as a ministry.

Monica: There was a time in your life when you went through a period of alcohol addiction. What was your view of life at that time?

Donna: When I mentioned earlier that I went back to Connecticut, I didn’t want to go back. I really wanted to go to South Carolina, but my mother insisted that I come back. We didn’t realize it at first, but my mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and it made sense why I ended up going back to Connecticut.

Here I was with three babies who were depending on me, now my mother was depending on me and also my father was now depending on me.

It seemed like even my brothers and sisters would turn to me for things.

But there was no where for me to turn. It felt like everyone was drawing from me and I had nothing or no one to draw from.

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Extraordinary Profiles

To relax, I would have a drink. The next thing I knew, it was my comfort at night, my way to go to sleep, my way of relaxing until I realized it had more control over me than I did over it.

When I got to that point, that’s when it became scary. I was what I call a functioning alcoholic. I didn’t realize I was an alcoholic. Every night I drank and every morning I got up and went to work, came home and drank again. I was scared to drink and drive so once I got home, I stayed home.

When my kids saw me with a beer, that wasn’t a problem because they were little and they had no idea how many I had. If my friends saw me with a beer, they didn’t realize how many beers I already had. So, no one realized I had a drinking problem except me. I realized it when I knew I couldn’t quit.

What made me want to quit was one day my daughter came to my room and she said, “Come on mommy let’s go.” I said, “Go where?” She said, “I’ve got my recital tonight.” Well, I had been drinking and I had forgotten she had a recital. That’s when I realized I had a problem. When I couldn’t take her, she was devastated. At that point, I knew I had to quit but I just couldn’t do it on my own. I spent several months crying, not knowing how I was going to do it.

At one time I did and I experienced hallucinations because I stopped drinking, cold-turkey. I had been drinking for almost twenty years. I didn’t realize that was dangerous to my health. Once I realized what was going on, I started drinking again, thinking I could drink a little bit, but I ended up right back where I was before.

I went to the doctor and sought other help but when I realized that I would have to go to a special place or to meetings to get help, I again, became determined that I wasn’t going to allow anything to have more control over me than I had over it.

That’s when I got on my knees one day and said, “God, you said that you would take anything from me that was unlike you if I sincerely asked you to.” I asked him to do it, and the very hour I asked God to take it from me, He delivered me from cigarettes and alcohol. I sincerely, in my heart didn’t want it anymore. I never again had a desire in my life for a cigarette or a drink.

My body had reached a point where I could not breathe. I literally could not take a flight of stairs without having to stop and take a breath. It had gotten so bad that I began to make funeral arrangements for myself. I made cassette tapes for my children because I felt like I was that close to death.

One of the important things in life is that if you can look at the bright side of a circumstance, you’ll be able to see that the sky is the limit in everything that you can do.

To me, there’s nothing in life that can happen, that someone can’t reach and see that God is in it and see how they’ll come out of it. Look back and see a bright side. ♦

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Inspiration

Happiness is a result of both inward and outward changes that you have to make.

Inspiring Women and Young Ladies to Live Purposeful Lives

Inspiration

H

elping people improve their lives has always been a part of Tamara Smith's life’s purpose.

From corporate America to the non-profit sector, she has made a difference by improving the health and well being of individuals and families, providing opportunities for women to improve their economic sustainability and developing young leaders.

For the past 30 years, Smith has held positions that have enabled her to make leadership decisions on health care plans affecting thousands of lives. She has served as President and CEO of D.C. Chartered Health Plan, CEO and Executive Vice President of Capital Community Health Plan, Director of Government Relations and Director of Marketing at Kaiser Foundation Health Plan of the Mid-Atlantic States, and in other top leadership positions.

While fulfilling her passion for helping people improve their health and well being, Smith has made an amazing transition from corporate America to the non-profit sector and currently serves as CEO of the YWCA, National Capital Area.

Her impeccable record and desire to achieve excellence have enabled her to help organizations establish clear visions, and achieve organizational goals, increase customer satisfaction, exceed membership goals and budget objectives.

Smith also currently serves on the Board of Trustees of Lake Forest College, the Excel Institute for Automotive Training, the Nonprofit Roundtable and YWCA MidAtlantic Regional Council. She has also served in leadership, volunteer or advisory roles for other organizations, including: Whitman Walker Clinic, Hoop Dreams and Medicaid Health Plans of America.

Smith shared her passion for strong advocacy for the health and well being of women and families with Exceptional People Magazine.

Monica: How has being CEO of the National Capital Area YWCA impacted your life versus being the CEO of an organization in the corporate world?

Tamara: That’s an interesting question. I think it certainly gives me a level of satisfaction, and a feeling that the work that we're doing is making a difference. It certainly allows me to work with a group of very dedicated and passionate staff members and board members. It al-

lows me the opportunity to interact with young men and women who are trying to transform their lives.

It brings me into very different circles, foundations and corporate organizations that want to support this mission and this work. It brings me into different advocacy circles, so it's a different group of individuals that are focused on supporting, financially and philanthropically, organizations that do the work that we do.

Monica: As CEO of the National Capital Area Chapter, how many people or members do you support?

Tamara: Well, it's not a typical association. In other words, the YWCA National Capital Area is its own freestanding organization. It has its own board of directors and is fully independent in terms of managing its finance and operations. And we are a part of Mid-Atlantic Region, so there are a number of other YWCAs in the region. We're all part of a mid-Atlantic regional council.

Then there are nine regions around the country that are part of YWCA, and they make up the national coordinating board of the YWCA U.S.A. We're not focused on building a membership, if you will.

Monica: What are some of the core areas that you focus on when it comes to helping families and women become self-sufficient?

Tamara: We focus on three areas, to include education and training in both early childhood development and child care services. We provide day care services in Northern Virginia, and then we also focus on adult education and learning and workforce readiness. Our second area is health and wellness where we provide free, communitybased health promotion programs, exercise programs, nutritional awareness programs, as well as very affordable feebased programs, classes, yoga, line dancing, Zumba and a variety of other exercise-type classes at our downtown location.

And the third area is social justice where we promote and provide domestic violence awareness and prevention programs, racial justice dialogue series, and an annual Stand Against Racism initiative that engages the community to work on issues of reducing bias, hate crimes and racism.

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Inspiration

development and social justice initiatives for girls five to eighteen.

Monica: It sounds like you take the holistic approach.

Tamara: We definitely take a holistic approach. That's exactly right. We try to integrate our programs with one another for all the women that we serve. We target lowincome women and children and families. Our social justice initiatives are city-wide and regional. The domestic violence prevention and awareness initiatives are also city-wide and more regional.

Monica: You're passionate about working to improve the lives of women and families. Has that always been an interest of yours, or only through the YWCA? Tamara: That's a good question. I became interested in the field of health and healthcare service delivery when I was in college, and I did an internship at Cook County Hospital, which is a public hospital in Chicago. I was exposed to some of the disparities that exist on issues of health, access to healthcare services and how they disproportionately impacted low-income and working families.

My awareness of disparities was raised at that time, and I wanted to work in an arena that helped address those disparities. It's really always been a passion of mine.

I worked in the health care sector, which is really a service delivery sector, non-profit sector for a number of years, as well as the corporate for-profit sector. I think my passion has always been trying to take a holistic approach to help improve the health status of individuals.

Monica: You've held amazing positions in the corporate world. What inspired you to leave corporate America for the non-profit arena?

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Tamara: I had a life-changing moment when there was a member of our health plan who tragically killed her four children. We were required to research the matter and find out what happened and what led to that tragic occurrence.

What I learned was that this was an individual who had her first child as a teenager, had dropped out of school, who had behavioral health issues and depression. She didn't have a job, was homeless and had really just fallen through the cracks and didn't have any support system. I realize that she took that tragic action, I think, because of the misery that her children were living on a day-to-day basis.

It was so emotionally traumatic for me that I realized that there were just thousands of young women who could be in that same situation. Really the only difference was that I had a system of support. I completed high school. I went on to college. I had a dream. I had a vision. I believed that I could do something with my life. So many women, if they had that support and that structure and those resources, would be able to achieve their dreams too.

It was a leap of faith, and I realized that it's something that if I wasn't part of the solution, then I was part of the problem. I wanted to try to reduce the likelihood of those kinds of things happening again.

Monica: You have served as the CEO at many different corporations, and you are definitely a leader. So coming from a woman's perspective what challenges, if any, have you encountered over the years as a female leader, as opposed to what men may encounter?

Tamara: Well, there are always challenges, I think, being included in ‘the club,' the men's club, if you will. When you work in predominately male organizations, oftentimes there are barriers and challenges to being in the loop. I have found that if you establish relationships with individu-

Inspiration

als and build those relationships, the understanding, the commonality, the acceptance and the inclusion increases.

So instead of looking at those things as barriers and challenges, I tried to find a way to build relationships with individuals that allowed me to become part of that group, or certainly participate in the functions and the decisions and things that were going on.

So my lesson to individuals is, it's not always just what you do day-to-day, it's also finding commonality with others, whether it be on an informal basis, whether it's playing golf, playing tennis, talking about your family or your animals. It could be figuring out where you grew up and where there might be some commonality. We all have commonality, regardless of how different our backgrounds are. There is much commonality among people.

You can tear down some of those barriers by reaching out and finding some of those commonalities. I think I've been pretty successful at doing that.

I think that oftentimes women aren't heard in the same way that men are heard, and I think that we have to continue to be persistent and speak our minds and advocate for ourselves.

Monica: With so many challenges in the world and so many things happening, we can certainly use many more great leaders. How does one discover the leader within, or determine if you have true leadership abilities?

Tamara: I think that you can develop your leadership skills in a number of ways. Part of that is by getting involved, whether you're in school, whether it's at your workplace, whether it's at your place of worship, whether it's in your circle of friends or family. Leadership can take on many different forms. You can advocate on behalf of a family member, that's taking leadership.

I always got involved in a lot of professional associations, and I took on leadership roles. It helped me develop leadership skills in a very supportive non-threatening way because people that are volunteering their time are working together. So it's not competitive. It's not a working situation; it's a volunteering situation. That's a tremendous way for people to develop leadership skills. Through those volunteer activities, I built relationships with a number of people, and then I began to receive offers for different positions of leadership. So I think it's by dedication of your time, by giving of your talent and by growing your own skills. Outside of the workplace, oftentimes you build your leadership skills. Then you begin to realize you're comfortable in these kinds of settings, and those skills are always transferable to everything you do in life.

Monica: As the CEO of the National Capital Area chapter, what is your vision for the organization?

Tamara: My vision is that we continue to provide programs and services to transform the lives of women and girls and families and allow them to reach their full potential. By that I mean young girls stay in school, finish school, decide they want to go on to college, or get jobs and start careers. They can identify their dreams through the programs and services that we offer, they can explore the various career options, and they can have mentors and support systems to help them.

It means for adult learners who may have dropped out of school that we are helping them get back on track. We are transforming their lives. We are helping to create role models in them for their children and their families. They then can pursue dreams that they never realized in the past.

They're achieving their educational goals, they're getting employment, they're receiving additional degrees, and they are working to support themselves and their families.

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Inspiration

They're thinking strategically about how they’re going to create income and wealth for themselves and their families in the future.

So get out of your comfort zone. Get to know other people and believe in the value of building relationships with people that are like you and that are different from you.

We are changing the health status of individuals, whether it is young children who are inactive and we get them active through our soccer programs, or we get them active through our fitness and exercise classes in the community. We engage seniors in a regular exercise and fitness program that helps reduce their risk of chronic diseases or early onset of chronic diseases.

Monica: Is there anything else that you’d like to share?

We're helping individuals achieve their personal, educational and work-related goals, and we are continuing to prevent domestic violence, sexual abuse and human trafficking. We can promote awareness of these terrible problems, and we are beginning to encourage dialogue on the impact of racism and bias in this country and in society. We can understand how interrelated we are and how things will get better if we work to reduce racism and bias and we work together as individuals in our society.

When I see staff members grow and develop and create their own vision for things that they didn't think were possible in the past, I'm very, very rewarded. When I help people get the skills and the resources that they need to do the best they can, I feel very rewarded. So it's about helping people get the resources, the skills and the support they need to be the best that they can be to make a difference in the lives of others. And it's about seeing people grow and change and realize their dreams, the people that we serve.

Monica: That is wonderful. What words of encouragement can you offer young ladies and women about becoming leaders, or stepping up and living purposeful lives?

Tamara: I think three things. One is that you have to believe in yourself and know that you can make it happen. Two, is to remain optimistic. You'll have barriers, you'll have challenges, you'll face disappointment, but your attitude has so much to do with your impact on others and your own success. Thirdly, relationships are so important. You never know who you're going to meet, who you're going to sit next to. Get out of your comfort zone and get to know people that you may not get to know normally. You will be amazed to learn how people are willing to help you, people that have something in common with you.

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Tamara: I was sharing with some undergraduate students the concept of moving from success to significance in your life. What I mean by that is success can be defined as making money, or having an important title, or getting a lot of resources, or a lot of material things. But what's important is it has to be self-directed and self-driven. When you think about what's significant in your life, when you think about the legacy that you want to leave, it isn't necessarily the money that you made or the title that you had, it's the people that you’ve touched. It's the individuals that you helped. It's the difference that you were able to make in the world. I think that people can make decisions about jobs, about where they spend their money, or how they give their money away, in a way that allows us to all feel like we're making this world a better place. Success can be defined in ways other than materially. I think it's so important to think about what your values are, and those values should drive how you spend your time, and how you treat people and how you spend your money.

We can individually define success, and we can individually define how significant we want our lives to be. I encourage everyone to think about their own values, how they can be significant in their lifetimes and match that with how they define success.

Inspiration

There is a picturesque lake near our home, and when I pass by it and look out into the clear blue waters, I smile as I think of a story that I heard about two friends who were fishing.

Early one day, the two friends, Mark and Bill, decided to go fishing at a lake across town. It was a beautiful, sunfilled morning, and equipped with their fishing rods and some bait, they planned to fish for the entire day in the pristine, open waters.

As the morning hours lengthened, one of the friends, Bill, had an odd fishing practice. When he would catch a fish, he would examine it closely. And, if the fish was really big, Bill would gently toss it back into the glistening lake.

All through the day, the two friends covered more ground, and next they moved near some large rocks to fish. Once again, if Bill reeled in a really large fish, he’d look at it, and then toss it back.

Thereafter, Bill cast his bait near a lily pad, and before long he caught another large fish. Yet again, Bill inspected it and tossed it back into the lake.

Many hours passed, and watching curiously, Mark asked his friend sternly, “Bill, why are

you throwing back into the lake all the really large fish that you catch?”

Quickly and matter-of-factly, Bill answered, “Well, I only have a very small frying pan in which to cook them.”

Dare to Entertain Big Dreams

by Catherine Galasso-Vigorito

Has something happened that has caused you to toss away your dreams and goals? Are you reluctant to dream really big dreams?

We all face challenges and setbacks that initially seem to be insurmountable. And then, because of those unforeseen problems, similar to Bill who tossed back into the lake all the ‘big fish’ that he caught, we too, may toss back our big dreams, big goals, and big opportunities for our future.

Do not limit yourself by

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Inspiration

your present situation. Allow yourself to dream and to imagine the life that you desire to live. Think of it this way: Five years from now, if there were no obstacles in your path, what big dreams would you have implemented? If your potential was unlimited, what kind of life would you create for yourself and your family?

The key is to first dream big, God-sized dreams, think big thoughts, creating a clear mental picture of where you are going. For we tend to travel in the direction of our dominate thoughts. Then, with faith, call those big dreams forth, ‘as if’ they were already here, and work toward them.

In the Bible, Abraham was a great role model of faith.

Even when there was nothing left to hope for, Abraham still hoped and believed. Abraham hoped where there was no human hope. “Why?” you may question. Because his trust was not in human capabilities, it was in the divine power of God. Abraham was called, the “father of all who believe.” Romans 4:11. And we need that sort of steadfast faith to safeguard us when we are pursuing our big, God-sized dreams.

Perhaps, fears have threatened to pull you down. Maybe you received some discouraging news. Or else, someone might have intentionally tried to hurt you. And at this point, you’re worn-out and tired saying, “It’s just not worth it anymore.”

But, keep in mind that God wants to bless you. He wants to give you the desires of your heart. He wants you to succeed. Therefore, don’t settle and toss away your precious dreams. Now is not the time to get discouraged.

Now is not the time to quit. A reader, who has recently overcome some tremendous difficulties, had this suggestion, “When uncertainties bombard you, recall that God is your refuge; He’s all-powerful and stronger than anything you could face. Do not be dissuaded. Expect a miraculous intervention.”

If some doors have shut on you, find the courage to keep walking through to another door, a better door. Although a person you trusted may have deliberately betrayed you.

Forget it, let it go and carry on. When you don’t have the strength to stand up on your own, seek out faith-filled, positive people who will lift you up, encourage and inspire you.

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There is an abundance of joy in your future. Thus, never renounce your higher aspirations. Continue to follow your heart and like Abraham… hope and believe.

God has not brought you this far to give up on you now.

It’s time for His favor. It’s time for God’s blessings on your life. A miracle is coming your way. There is victory in store for you. Choose to believe, “it’s possible,” and dream big, for with God, all things are possible.

I like this quote by Madeline Bridges that tells us, “There are loyal hearts; there are spirits brave; there are souls that are pure and true. Then give the world the best you have.

And the best will come back to you.”

Dear readers, I believe in your great potential. You were created by God to influence others for His glory and for their good. So, dare to dream big, God-sized dreams and then go out and make all them come true!

Inspiration

5 Tips to Stop Obsessing and Find Bliss During the Holidays

by Inez Bracy

Many boomers between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Day find exquisite enjoyment in the preparations, cooking, buying presents, singing carols and just generally spreading good cheer.

On the other hand, there are those of you who are not exactly Scrooge but VERY close. You decided to opt out of the obsessive commercialism surrounding the Holiday season. You’ve become numb to Christmas decorations in September, only toys and other such ads on TV, and

2. Remember the things that bring you joy. Plan activities around those enjoyable things. Be sure to do the necessary steps (purchase tickets, invite friends, etc.) in plenty of time to avoid stress. When planning for the entire family, give them the dates and times well in advance so that there is no confusion.

3. Do not overfill your calendar! Stress often comes because you’ve said ‘yes’ to too many activities. Are you joining friends for breakfast, lunch and dinner because you want to see them all? If this is not your normal weekly behavior, you might decide to limit them.

Be sure to take time for self; exercise, get plenty of sleep, eat healthy foods and drink plenty of water. Give yourself a treat with a special massage, facial, manicure or pedicure. This gives you additional energy and uplifts your spirit because you’re taking care of yourself. Put a smile on your face and spring in your step.

the much dreaded Holiday parties. You’re thinking, “Must I carry a gift to ALL of these.” Remember, you can choose; take a gift or not.

Much like Scrooge, you find no joy in any of the things people are celebrating and just wish that it would be over! Celebrating the holidays for you becomes a gargantuan effort leading to stress.

This year can be different! You can stop obsessing, choose to become more ‘ho-ho’ like and enjoy the holidays with a few easy tips.

4. Just because this is the season for giving doesn’t mean you must go overboard. Pace yourself, give gifts that bring you joy and have meaning for the recipient. Also, be open to receiving and accept graciously and gratefully.

Following these easy tips and others that work for you, will ensure that you have blissful holidays. Boomers can finally choose to celebrate the holidays in the way that is best for them. Does that sound selfish? Okay, perhaps it is a ‘tad bit’ selfish, however, you have the right to be blissful. The more bliss you experience, the easier it is to share joy with your love ones. You can stop obsessing over the holidays!

1. Set reasonable/seasonable expectations. You don’t have to do it all. Organize your time and prioritize your activities. Distinguish between urgent, important and “that would be nice.” Because you have a choice, make a list and choose your priorities.

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All of us at Exceptional People Magazine want to thank our extraordinary guests for their generosity in participating in our special Christmas holiday promotion giveaway. Their kindness and thoughtfulness to contribute such great gifts will help change the lives of thirteen subscribers. Below are brief bios of each contributor and what they graciously offered to include in our promotion.

Visit http://www.exceptionalmag.com/spiritofgiving.html to learn more and sign up for free.

William McMillian One winner will receive a free marketing gift totaling $1,500 from William McMillian, founder of the awardwinning New York design firm McMillian + Furlow. He has worked at The New York Times Magazine Group and CondĂŠ Nast. William has been consistently recognized for his design work with international, national and local design awards. His company specializes in branding, social media and interactive design. His clients include: the East River Ferry, GoRadio, Kiplinger's Magazine, CondĂŠ Nast, The New York Times, MetroTech BID and Sports and Leisure Research Group. Visit his website at: http://mcmillianfurlow.com/ One winner will receive a brand new logo design and new business cards. The winner will select a logo from three design ideas. Once the logo is selected the winner will then select one of three business card idea s presented and receive a free order of 500 business cards, plus the use of the logo on their website.

Dr. Deana Murphy Three winners will receive free life-changing gifts, a combined value totaling over $400 from Dr. Deana Murphy, America's 1st Interior LifeDesign Doctor. Dr. Murphy is the author of three books including Designing for the King and also the creator of the "360 Interior Living S.Y.S.T.E.M. (Shaping Your Spirit To Eliminate the Mess)".

Her book, Designing for the King: From Chaos to Order by Designing Within was awarded Best Book of the Year for 2010, and she still appears on reoccurring episodes of HGTV and Fine Living. Dr. Deana has interviewed with O Magazine and is included in the New York Metropolitan's Who's Who among Professional Women and in Meredith Books. In recognition of designers across America, Panache Partners of Dallas, Texas declared Dr. Deana one of Greatest Philadelphia's finest designers. Visit her website at: http://deanamurphyglobal.com/.

The three winners each will receive one of the following gifts: (1) The e-book format of Designing for the King, (2) The 360 Interior Branding: 7 Days to Clarity and Confidence Package (this includes 360 Interior Branding Companion Journal; 360 Signature Brand Design Workbook: 7 Directives to Think Small to Go Big), and (3) A 45 minute complimentary life design consultation.

Geir Ness Six winners will receive a great gifts, a combined value totaling $600 from international celebrity fragrance designer, Geir Ness. Ness is the owner of the Laila Perfume Company. Not only is he a successful fragrance designer, but he is a motivational speaker and seminar presenter who speaks at schools and other events throughout the USA and Europe. Visit http://www.laila.com to learn more about Geir Ness.

Today the company’s products are featured in gift baskets for events such as the Tony Awards, the Grammy's, MTV Awards, Miss Universe, Miss Sport Football and the Euro-Vision Song Contest.

Tony Ellison Three winners will receive great office products, a combined value of $250 from Tony Ellison, founder and CEO of Shoplet.com, the leading purely online office supply retailer. Founded in 1994, Shoplet is one of the original e-marketplaces.

Tony Ellison, witnessed the web's early years as a senior executive with Goldman Sachs' technology division. Tony was one of the first financiers to recognize the internet's potential in retailing, and in 1994, he struck out on his own. His vision for Shoplet was to provide a more comprehensive selection of business products faster, and at a lower cost than brick-and-mortar retailers. Visit his website at: http://www.shoplet.com.

Three winners each will receive one of the following:

Three women and three men will each receive a fragrance gift pack worth $120.

2 Gigabyte USB Flash Drive

Inspiration

The Four Stages of Change--What Stage are You In?

by Shelley Riutta, MSE, LPC

Discover where you are in your growth and change process.

We are always in an evolving cycle of change - letting go of the old and stepping into the new. Sometimes we welcome this change with open arms, sometimes we resist with all of our might. It can be helpful to know which stage you are in–so you can understand what is going on for you–and work with this process of change rather than against it. Here are the four stages: 1. Dissatisfaction or “feeling the gap”. This is when there is a large gap between where you are and where you would like to be. You might not be completely clear where you want to be. You may just have the clarity that what you are experiencing now is not working for you. This is an uncomfortable place to be and oftentimes I have clients come to me and label this stage as “depression”. Try to frame the dissatisfaction as information signaling you to grow rather than labeling it as a permanent position ex. “I will always feel this way–my life never goes that way I want it to.” How you frame it can change your experience of it. If you frame it as a signal for growth you will feel empowered—if you focus on it from a state of helplessness you will feel despair.

2. Exploration - In this stage you feel the dissatisfaction, but you don’t quite know what would feel better to you. Or you have a sense of what would feel better, but you don’t know how to get there. This is the stage where you explore options and “try them on” to see how it would feel or you explore options of how to get where you want to go. It is important to take your time in this phase to truly explore. People oftentimes feel uncomfortable with the lack of certainty at this point and may try to bypass this by choosing an option to get out of this stage. Reassure yourself that you will come to an option that feels right to you– just give it time. The other thing to watch in this stage is the opposite—exploring so much that you get confused and stuck in considering options. Sometimes people fear making a change and hang out in the exploration stage as a 80 | Exceptional People Magazine | November-December 2011

safety zone to not take any risks. Make sure you aren’t doing this either.

3. Action/Visualization - In this stage you have clarity about where you want to go and you develop a plan to get there. Again, you may know where you want to go but are unclear of a plan to get there—and this is something that needs to be finalized in this stage. You may have developed somewhat of a plan in the exploration stage– and in this stage you will clarify this plan and begin to implement. As you begin to move forward your wounded self may become afraid—it is important to stay tuned in and bring through the truth to this scared part of you. Staying in faith rather than fear will help you to move forward more easily. In this stage it is important to get support for you to stay on track with the implementation of the plan to achieve your goal. Without support, fears that surface may sidetrack you and stop you from moving forward. You can share with a close friend or partner your plan and ask them to be an accountability buddy to you. The other part of this stage is to spend time visualizing the positive outcome of your desired change. See it working out in the easiest, magical and fun way. This vision can help keep you focused when your desired change is in process and not quite complete. The phrase “keep your eye on the prize” is fitting here.

4. Stepping into the New - Moving into your change can be a gradual process or it could come more quickly– like meeting your Soul mate within weeks of this process–or your dream job lands in your lap overnight.

Either way there is an adjustment phase to the new change. There can be feelings of loss from letting go of the old. Even though you were dissatisfied with the old situation, it represented the familiar to you. With the new changes there may come feelings of having a new identity or parts of you being expressed that have never been expressed before. Typically people feel more aliveness and vitality in this stage. You can also feel a deep sense of satisfaction that you made a change that was in alignment with your Authentic Self—your true desires. You will feel on the right path with your life- like you are back on track again.

The Lighter Side

Lighter Side

THOSE CUTE LITTLE SPROUTS

by Angie Brennan We had an interesting culinary adventure the other night. It started earlier in the week when I was strolling through the produce section at the grocery store. I was just reaching for my usual bag ‘o salad when I spotted some fresh Brussels sprouts. Perhaps I’ll never know what compelled me to scoop those little guys up and bring them home. But home they came.

“Why are we having those?” asked my youngest child as I began to prepare dinner. A fair question.

Brussels sprouts are not regular guests at our table. For one thing, they don’t look particularly appetizing. Tomatoes and carrots are bright and festive-looking.

Brussels sprouts, on the other hand, rank right up there with potted meat as food least likely to be used as a decorative garnish. Besides that, any food that makes you sound like a leaky tire when saying its name (just try pronouncing all four “s” sounds) is already starting out with a bit of a handicap.

I admit it: I eat vegetables with almost as much reluctance as my kids do. Salad? Sure, I'll have some, as long as it’s loaded with high-fat dressing, croutons, and maybe some grated cheddar cheese. Also, from time to time I will add lettuce and tomatoes to my cheeseburger.

Once, in a fit of temporary insanity and nutritional productivity (always a dangerous combination), I planted a vegetable garden. Unfortunately, very few of those veggie seedlings survived my decidedly ungreen thumb. But I did manage to produce an impressive crop of okra plants. Enough, in fact, to feed a small army of farm hands three times a day….not that

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any farm hands would have wanted them. I attempted to make the tasty, crunchy fried okra I remembered enjoying as a child at my grandmother’s house. Instead, I ended up with something resembling slimy bamboo. The okra crop ended up being more of an interesting landscape curiosity than a source of food.

But despite my troubled past relationships with vegetables, I decided to take my chances with Brussels sprouts.

I’d read about how they have a deliciously subtle nutty flavor. An under-appreciated vegetable.

At last the family was assembled at the table and the food set out. My kids stared in horrified fascination at the strange green blobs on their plates. “Aren’t they cute?” I said brightly. “They’re like miniature heads of lettuce!” Somehow that failed to fire their imaginations.

Then it came time to eat. My eldest child obediently swallowed sprout after sprout with grim determination until the awful task had been completed. My middle child continued to stare, unmoving. My youngest ignored the sprouts and cheerfully ate the rest of her meal.

So maybe they were kind of cute (the Brussels sprouts, not the kids). Still, the dish clearly wasn’t a hit. But I came up with an idea of how to make my kids appreciate this new vegetable. Next week I’ll whip up a batch of Mom’s Famous Slimed Okra with a big dollop of potted meat on the side. Compared to that, Brussels sprouts will seem like a treat!

On second thought, maybe I’ll just stick with cheeseburgers. Ketchup counts as a vegetable, right?

Lighter Side

The Swimmer Once there was a millionaire who had a collection of live alligators. He also had a beautiful, single daughter. One day, he threw a huge party at which he announced, "I have a proposition to every man here. I will give $1 million or my daughter to the man who can swim across this pool full of alligators and emerge unharmed!" Just then, there was the sound of a large splash. The guests turned and saw a man in the pool. They cheered him on as he kept frantically stroking. Finally, the swimmer made it to the other side unharmed. The millionaire exclaimed, "My boy, that was incredible! Fantastic! I must keep my end of the bargain. Which do you want, my daughter or the $1 million?" The man exclaimed, "Listen, I don't want your money. I don't want your daughter, either. I want the person who pushed me into that water!"

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Lighter Side

Dear Clever Advice Columnist

by Dorothy Rosby People often ask me for advice. Well, sometimes people ask me for advice. Oh heck! Nobody ever asks me for advice. But I wish they would, because I have wanted to be an advice columnist my entire career. So today, I will offer advice as though I were a real advice columnist using real questions that real people would have asked me if they had thought of them.

Dear Clever Advice Columnist, My neighbors seemed nice enough when they moved in a few years ago, so when they asked to borrow our lawn mower, we agreed. Since then, they borrow it once a week all summer. They even get it out of our garage without asking. From a cup of sugar the week they moved in, they've begun to borrow not one egg, but a dozen, and not just my mixer, but my oven. Last week they brought a list when they came over. They left my house with two pounds of hamburger, buns, ketchup, pickles and potato chips. And they didn't even invite us to the cookout. I believe in being neighborly, but they're eating me out of house and home. What can I do?

Signed, Not a grocery store Dear Not a Grocery Store, Wow! They really mow once a week?

Dear Wise and Powerful Advice Columnist, My fiancĂŠ and I are deeply in love but we are from vastly different backgrounds. Everyone says our marriage is doomed. What do you think?

Signed, Finished Before We Start Dear Finished, Nobody can tell who you should or shouldn't marry-except me. I can tell you. And I say there are three ingredients essential to a long marriage: commitment, communication, and agreement on where the thermostat should be set. If you and your fiancĂŠ have all of these, go ahead. And don't invite any naysayers to your wedding--unless you think you can get a good gift out of them.

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Oh Wise One, My dear friend of twenty-five years has recently developed serious financial problems and has asked me for loans on several occasions. So far, I've avoided the situation by making excuses, but I feel like a heel. I'm no Bill Gates, but I am doing pretty darn well. And this is a good friend we're talking about. Should I loan him the money?

Signed, Not Bill Gates Dear Not Bill, Please don't take this wrong, but are you NUTS? Sure!

Go ahead and loan him the money--if you never want to see it again. Then don't come crying to me. If you're just feeling guilty about not sharing your wealth, consider making a gift to a favorite charity--or to me.

Dear Keeper of all Wisdom, My twenty-fifth high school reunion is coming up this summer. I want to go, but I've gained forty pounds. My wife left me for the class nerd who is now the CEO of a Fortune 500 company. I was recently fired from my job.

To add insult to injury, I was voted Most Likely to Succeed. How should I handle the reunion?

Sincerely, Anonymous Dear Anonymous, Wow! I'd sign Anonymous if I were you too. I'm JOKING! Seriously, I don't believe anyone should attend a class reunion until they have something to show for themselves. That's why I haven't attended one in years.

But if you insist on going, do what countless other reunion attendees before you have done. LIE! Well that's all the space we have. And remember reader, the best advice is, never take any bad advice.

Profile Resources Part One Geir Ness, Pg. 6, Celebrity Fragrance Designer Runs New York Marathon in Memory of Champion Grete Waitz http://www.laila.com/ Janeé Harrell, Pg. 12, Transforming Lives Through Positive Media http://www.thejaneeshow.com/ Tony Ellison, Pg. 22, Transforming the Office Supply Business http://www.shoplet.com William McMillian, Pg. 28, Building Brands That Impact Bottom Lines http://mcmillianfurlow.com/ Alexandra Watson, Pg. 36, Happiness Coach Helps People Discover Joy http://www.AlexandraWatson.com and http://www.T2Shine.com Cover Photo Credits Geir Ness—David Vance Other Photo Credits Janeé Harrell, Pg. 12 and all interview photos, Vera Crosby, http://www.photographybyvera.com— Makeup by Jennifer Honeycutt

Part Two Dr. Deana Murphy, Pg. 50, Living By Design: Helping Women Design Their Lives http://deanamurphyglobal.com/ Jose Guzman, Pg. 56, Former Texas Ranger Scores a Home Run for Individuals with Alzheimer’s Disease http://www.guzman23foundation.org/ Donna Reed, Pg. 62, Too Blessed to Be Stressed http://www.teachboysandgirlssuccess.org/home.html Tamara A. Smith, Pg. 70, Inspiring Women and Young Ladies to Live Purposeful Lives http://www.ywcanca.org/ Cover Photo Credits Dr. Deana Murphy, Pg. 48, and all interview photos, Chuck Carter, Carter Creations http://cartercreationsphotography.com/ Other Photo Credits Monica Davis—Pgs. 3, 4 and back cover, Ever After Visuals—http://everaftervisuals.com Tamara A. Smith, Pg. 70 and all interview photos—Anthony Tilghman, http://www.anthonytilghman.com Additional Credits Graphics: Jeff Hayes, http://www.plasmafiregraphics.com November-December 2011 | Exceptional People Magazine | 85

Writers and Contributors

William R. Patterson

Annemarie Cross

Ranked as the #1 Business Motivational Speaker by Ranking.com, William R. Patterson is a three-time award-winning lecturer and international bestselling author who uses his trademark approach, THE BARON SOLUTION™, to coach, train, and motivate business leaders, sales professionals, entrepreneurs, and investors. His breakthrough book, The Baron Son, has been translated around the world and featured in the Forbes Book Club and Black Enterprise. William is an internationally recognized wealth and business coach who has been a featured guest on over 500 television and radio programs.

William's website, BaronSeries.com, is winner of four 2009 Web Awards including: Best Speaker; Best Male Author; Best Business Advice Site; and Best WealthBuilding Site. For more information, visit http://www.baronseries.com

Annemarie Cross is a Career Management & Personal Branding Strategist, Speaker, Consultant, Radio Broadcaster, and Author of ’10 Key Steps to Ace that Interview!’ She is also the founder/ principal of Advanced Employment Concepts – Career Management and Corporate Career Development Specialists offering powerful programs for people striving for career success and fulfillment, as well as savvy companies committed to building and retaining their most important asset – their staff.

Widely considered a personal change agent and success catalyst, Annemarie has distinguished herself as being people-focused, caring, inspirational and life-changing in her approach. Annemarie can be contacted at www.a-e-c.com.au email: info@a-e-c.com.au.

Catherine Galasso-Vigorito

James Adonis

Catherine Galasso-Vigorito’s nationally syndicated weekly column, “A New You,” has endeared her to readers worldwide for over 15 years.

James Adonis is a people-management thinker and the author of three books including his latest, ‘Corporate Punishment: Smashing the Management Clichés for Leaders in a New World’. Thought-provoking and entertaining, James's keynote presentations and workshops show companies how to solve staff turnover, engage all generations, and win the war for talent. He has presented to audiences across Australia, Europe, Asia, and the Middle East, with an impressive list of clients including McDonald's, American Express, CocaCola, Qantas, and Gucci. www.jamesadonis.com.

Known for her ability to uplift and encourage, Catherine has become America’s most beloved inspirational voice.

Catherine is the founder and CEO of her own company, A New You Worldwide, developing and designing inspirational products. Her mission is to instill hope in the hearts of people everywhere, inspiring them to live a better life. She makes her home on the East Coast with her husband and three daughters.

Visit her website at www.anewyouworldwide.com Searching for inspirational gifts - visit http://www.qvc.com/qic/qvcapp.aspx/app.nav/ params.class.K990/walk.yah.0101-K990.

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Writers and Contributors

Rosalind Sedacca

Margaret Paul

Recognized as The Voice of Child-Centered Divorce, Rosalind Sedacca is a Certified Corporate Trainer and founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network for parents facing, moving through or transitioning beyond divorce. She is the author of How Do I Tell the Kids about the Divorce? A Create-a-Storybook™ Guide to Preparing Your Children – with Love! which offers a unique approach to breaking divorce news to your children based on her own personal experience. She is also the 2008 National First Place Winner of the Victorious Woman Award.

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a noted public speaker, bestselling author, workshop leader, relationship expert, and Inner Bonding® facilitator. She has counseled individuals and couples, and led groups, classes, and workshops since 1968. She is the author and co-author of eight books, including the internationally bestselling Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?, Healing Your Aloneness, Inner Bonding, and Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By God?

As a Certified Corporate Trainer and Business Communication Strategist she provides consulting, speaking, training and Executive Coaching services to organizations nation-wide on marketing, public relations and business communication issues. She specializes in gender-related dynamics, marketing to women and employeemanagement collaboration in the workplace.

To learn more about her book, free ezine, programs and other valuable resources on creating a positive ChildCentered Divorce, visit www.childcentereddivorce.com and www.howdoitellthekids.com.

For more information about her customized programs, audio and videotapes, and other services, contact Rosalind at 561-742-3537 or Talk2Roz@bellsouth.net.

Dawn Abraham

She is the co-creator, along with Dr. Erika Chopich, of the Inner Bonding® healing process, recommended by actress Lindsay Wagner and singer Alanis Morissette, and featured on Oprah, and of the unique and popular website www.innerbonding.com. Their transformational selfhealing/conflict resolution software program, SelfQuest®, at www.selfquest.com, is being donated to prisons and schools and sold to the general public.

Sue Urda Sue Urda is an Author, Speaker, Inspirer and Co-Founder of Powerful You! Women’s Network, She was named twice on Inc. Magazines list of the 500 FastestGrowing Private Companies. Sue’s vision is to contribute to a global consciousness of women helping women succeed in business and in life and to open them to truth of who they are. www.sueurda.com.

Dawn Abraham is a Certified Life/Business Coach, and is an “Official Guide for Small Business Marketing at Selfgrowth.com. She also partners with professionals and entrepreneurs to help them create balanced lives while earning more money. Law of Attraction, Self Esteem, Abundance, Meditation, Motivation, Reiki, Private & Group Coaching, Free Life Changing Mp3's and Teleclasses are offered. http://www.qualified-lifecoach.com November-December 2011 | Exceptional People Magazine | 87

Writers and Contributors

Sharon Dahlonega Raiford Bush

Shelley Riutta

Sharon Dahlonega Raiford Bush is CEO of News Archives International. This multiaward-winning journalist writes and publishes news articles about productive individuals committed to making positive changes in their lives and in the world around them. She also writes and directs live performances for young, exceptional artists throughout the Los Angeles region. Sharon shares her life with her husband, veteran actor Grand L. Bush.

Shelley Riutta MSE, LPC is a Holistic Psychotherapist and Inner Bonding Facilitator in private practice specializing in Transformational individual counseling, presentations, groups and Workshops. To get her free workbook "What Do You REALLY Want: Finding Purpose and Passion in Your Life" or for information about the free teleclasses she does every month visit her web-site www.RadiantLifeCounseling.com or call her at 877-346-1167.

To learn more about Sharon, visit http://en.wikipedia.org/ wiki/Sharon_Dahlonega_Raiford_Bush and http://www.linkedin.com/in/sharonraifordbush. She can be contacted at https://www.facebook.com/TVwxGirl.

Dawn McCoy Dawn McCoy is author of "Leadership Building Blocks: An Insider's Guide to Success" http://flourishleadership.com/store/ index.html She is also is president and CEO of Flourish Leadership, LLC which provides coaching executives, public servants, and youth leaders. For author and speaker details, visit http:// www.flourishleadership.com.

Jack Canfield Jack is the founder and former CEO of Chicken Soup for the SoulÂŽ Enterprises, a billion dollar empire that encompasses licensing, merchandising and publishing activities around the globe. He is the Founder and Chairman of The Canfield Training Group which trains entrepreneurs, educators, corporate leaders and motivated individuals how to accelerate the achievement of their personal and professional goals. Jack is also the founder of The Foundation for Self-Esteem which provides self-esteem resources and trainings to social workers, welfare recipients and human resource professionals. http://www.jackcanfield.com/ 88 | Exceptional People Magazine | November-December 2011

Inez Bracy Inez Bracy is the host of her own radio talk show; Living Smart and Well and is a columnist for Senior Stuff a local ezine, the Orlando Examiner, a former columnist for the Island Voice magazine and the author of Rejuvenate Your Life in 21 Days.

Bracy’s radio show, Living Smart and Well shares tips on creating your best life and is heard globally on www.livingsmartandwell.com. Bracy is an author, a masterful coach, powerful trainer, and a dynamic speaker. With more than 20 years of experience working for educational institutions and non-profits, Bracy uses her knowledge to help people create extraordinary lives. http://overfiftyfineandfancy.com

Writers and Contributors

Dorothy Rosby

Eileen Lichtenstein

Dorothy Rosby is an entertaining speaker and syndicated humor columnist whose work appears regularly in 30-plus newspapers in eleven Western and Midwestern states. She is also Community Relations Director for an organization which supports people with disabilities. She lives in Rapid City, South Dakota with her husband, son, mother, and hamster.

Contact her at drosby@rushmore.com or see her website at www.dorothyrosby.com.

Eileen Lichtenstein, MS Ed, CEO of Balance & Power, Inc. is a certified Anger Management Specialist, Career and Mid-Life Coach, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique ) Practitioner and a former Biofeedback Therapist and faculty at Hofstra University. "SOAR! with Resilience™: The Interactive Book for Overcoming Obstacles & Achieving Success" is the core material for many of her trainings and a motivational read for anyone struggling to take their personal or professional life to a higher level of success and satisfaction. www.balanceandpower.com

Angie Brennan Angie Brennan is a humor writer and illustrator from Maryland. Visit her website at www.angiebrennan.com for cartoons, spoof advice, and more.

Greg Williams Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator, is an internationally sought after speaker/trainer. He provides negotiation expertise to corporate and individual clients that seek to maximize their negotiation efforts, at the negotiation table. You can sign up for Greg’s free negotiation tips at www.TheMasterNegotiator.com – You can also view his Negotiation Tip videos at http:// www.youtube.com/user/ TheMasterNegotiator - Greg’s motto is, “Remember, you’re always negotiating”.

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