Exceptional People Magazine – March/April 2011 Part 2

www.exceptionalmag.com

March-April 2011

CONTENTS

Extraordinary Profiles

Cover Photo Courtesy of Cliff Lispon for CBS

64

Cover Story— Della Reese–A Legend Among Stars

70

Jim Bouchard—The Black Belt Mindset

76

Martha Endum Teke–Intelligence, Dedication and Drive

Inspiration 82

Be Determined to Win the Race

The Lighter Side 85

Home-Spam Wisdom

88

Worrying Yourself to Better Health and Longer Life

89

Profile Resources

90

Writers and Contributors

“Don’t keep saying, ‘I don’t know where the time goes.’ It goes the same place it’s always gone and no one has ever known where that is.”

Andrew A. Rooney

We may look a little different... but we’re all part of the same family.

Extraordinary Profiles

Though she was not singing gospel music at that time, Ms. Reese remained close to her gospel roots, and it kept her grounded. “I found out that I could make a living singing what you all call secular music. Of course, the people at the church said that I had sold my soul to the devil, God had turned his back on me, and I was never going to be happy and successful…I have always tried to remain above reproach because I was holding onto my spirituality even though I was singing songs that were not gospel songs,” recalls Ms. Reese.

Extraordinary Profiles Della Reese— Reese— A Legend Among Stars Della Reese -- a legend in the entertainment industry, who has blazed a trail and opened doors of opportunity for many women.

At six years of age Ms. Reese began what became an amazing career. She began singing in church, and by age 13 she experienced the most thrilling opportunity of her life – an opportunity to sing with world-renown gospel singer Mahalia Jackson. Under Mahalia’s tutelage she learned how to communicate with the masses through song. It became an art form that Ms. Reese mastered and it helped her win over audiences from all backgrounds.

She spent three consecutive summers singing with Mahalia Jackson. Other opportunities followed, and she formed a gospel group, The Meditation Singers. The group won a contest in Detroit’s famed Flame Show Bar, and she signed her first recording contract with Jubilee Records in 1953.

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Singing secular music exposed her to such talents as Dinah Washington, Sara Vaughn, Ella Fitzgerald, Billy Holiday and others. This helped her to develop a style that garnered a national celebrity status for her.

Singing was not her only talent. She appeared on many classic television shows such as the Ed Sullivan Show and the Perry Como show. She was the first female to host The Tonight Show and soon after was she asked to host her own talk show. As the first black woman to host a television show, a precedent was set for other black women, as well as women in general who chose careers in television.

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Following her talk, she appeared in many comedic and dramatic acting roles. Her role in the American spiritual classic, Touched by An Angel, allowed her to combine everything that she learned from her parents, Mahalia Jackson and others into a powerful role that appealed to audiences of varied backgrounds.

nication, which is what I’ve been living on. I was fortunate enough to have a chance after I had grown up to tell her I recognized that she taught me the art of communication.

Ms. Reese graciously spoke with Monica, founder of Exceptional People Magazine, about her amazing journey as an entertainer on stage and on television.

Ms. Reese: I’ve made my living doing that since I was 13. God’s been good to me, and I say that again and again.

Monica: You had an opportunity as a teenager to travel and tour with Mahalia Jackson. What was that experience like?

Monica: You were raised in a church, singing gospel. How did you manage to stay in touch with your gospel roots while you were recording, singing and acting outside of the gospel genre?

Ms. Reese: Well, it wasn’t what I expected it to be because, as a teenager, I was going to be away from home, away from my mother. I had all these plans about what I was going to do and how I was going to be and how I was going to stretch out and have my way on everything.

And it didn’t turn out that way because my mother spoke to Mahalia after she had prayed about it and God had said it was okay for me to go. She spoke to Mahalia, and she said these words to Mahalia, “I’m letting my daughter go with you. I wouldn’t just let her go with anybody.

But I know you’re a good Christian woman, and I’ve got a good girl. I’m expecting you to bring back a better girl than you’re taking away.” And Mahalia took that to heart. So all my plans about partying, hanging out and meeting boys and being fast and fresh were killed before I got in the car to leave.

Monica: How has that served you over the years?

Ms. Reese: Now you can buy a ticket to a gospel concert for 50, $75, $100 in some cases. But when I was singing the gospel, the people gave an offering, and the offering usually consisted of coins.

And there was never enough. I sang with the Meditation Singers who are a part of the Gospel Hall of Fame, but there were five of us, and there was never enough money to go around.

And I was not satisfied with that kind of living, and so I decided – I found out that I could make a living singing what you all call secular music. Of course, the people at the church said that I had sold my soul to the devil, God had turned his back on me, and I was never going to be happy and successful.

I went to my minister, and I explained my circumstances, that I wasn’t eating regularly and Della Reese and the Meditation Singers of Detroit.

I didn’t have a place of And so that made it not comfort to stay in. I what I expected it to be. But fortunately, I’ve never been knew that I could make a living singing popular stupid, and from this woman I learned the art of commumusic. And he told me the words of Jesus Christ.

There was nothing I could do about it, and Mahalia held me to the grill.

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He said, “As long as you can be in the world and not of the world as Jesus was in the world and not of the world, there is no problem with your making a living.” Since he was my Christian leader, I took that to heart, and I have always tried to remain above reproach because I was holding onto my spirituality even though I was singing songs that were not gospel songs.

Monica: You’ve had some excellent opportunities at acting as well.

Ms. Reese: In the beginning way I sang – well, let’s say it’s a love story, and the boy and girl, the man and woman, fall out, and they think they’re going to separate.

The man goes into the bar to have a drink and be in remorse, or the woman goes into the park to cry and be in remorse. Then I would be the singer who would sing the love song that would bring them back together or remind them of how much they cared for each other. So they weren’t acting parts, they were appearances at which I sang as a part of the story.

After that, I took what was available. I had one-liners. I was in many different things where I had a part, but I was not a lead actress. Maybe I was the aunt, or maybe I was the lady who owned the grocery store. Maybe I was the maid who worked in the house or something of that sort so that I appeared, but you couldn’t really say I had a part as an actress. That was my learning area. I did that until I was able to go forward and do better.

Monica: You were the first female host of the Tonight Show as well as the first African-American woman to host your own show, and that must have been a thrill for you at that time.

Ms. Reese: Oh, that was a thrill. It was a thing that could not be done, and I love doing things that cannot be done.

Monica: How were you received by your audiences?

Ms. Reese: Oh, the audience was fine. It was the powers that be that had a problem with it.

Monica: What were some challenges that you encountered?

Ms. Reese: Well, I was born a black woman, and I had opinions about my work, and I had a very different attitude. I didn’t feel that I should suffer my work in order to 66 | Exceptional People Magazine | March-April 2011

have a job. So all of those things did not please the people I was working for.

Monica: But, of course, you did manage to overcome them.

Ms. Reese: I did, and that had to do with my gospel, with my relationship with God, with my understanding about who I was and what God was able to do for me.

Monica: As one of the main cast members of Touched by an Angel, were you able to incorporate some of yourself into the role?

Ms. Reese: I was appointed by the Father, I believe, to be there because there were things that had to be kept on the proper level. I knew the Bible. I was, at the time, studying to be a minister. I had gotten my certificate to be – my license to be a teacher of the Bible, and so I was able to say, “No. That doesn’t go like that. Think about it like this because this is the true meaning of it.” I was able to have something to do with the music, the songs that were chosen. I was just a pivotal part of it being held together.

There was no Tess until I created that part she was to have, as the superintendent, as the lead angel.

She had to be both severe and sweet. She had to be able to feel the nature of the people they were dealing with and yet stop the other angels from becoming too involved with them.

They had to have a certain level of standards, and I was able to be a part of maintaining those standards.

Monica: It really sounds like you helped mold the show.

Ms. Reese: I did because when it started, when we got the contract to do it, these angels did not exist.

It was nothing like what you eventually saw. Roma could heal, but she could only heal animals. I had been alive, and I had died from cancerous smoking.

So now I was an angel who smoked all the time because I could no longer die -- a series of things like that.

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And so they turned that down, but there was an appreciation from the audience of the relationship between Roma and me. This gave them a secure feeling to have Martha Williamson come in and rewrite it like you see it now.

And so Roma created the angel that she was, and I created Tess.

Ms. Reese: Oh, I hope I haven’t fulfilled them all them all yet. Heaven is my home, but I’m not homesick at all.

Monica: Do you consider yourself to be a pioneer for African-American women?

Ms. Reese: I don’t really know how to answer that because since I was six, as far as the music that lead into the gospel music that lead into the other music -- every step I was giving all I had to give.

Warner Brothers didn’t send a limousine for me and bring me to Hollywood and make me a star. I came up through the chitlin circuit. I came up through whatever was available for me to take another step to another level. So I don’t know that there was one particular thing that made me feel that, hey, I’ve made it.

Ms. Reese: Looking back, there were things that I did that were of a pioneering nature, but I have to tell you the truth. I didn’t go about it with that in mind. I was trying to get some food. I was a single mother. I was trying to take care of my child. I was tired of living with nothing. I wanted to accumulate something, but I had to go through some of those doors that were closed in order to do what I was trying to do for me and my family. And looking back, like the Della Show was a pioneering effort for black women. I opened the door for Oprah because it had never been done before.

I opened the door for Diana Ross to be a host on the Johnny Carson show because no black woman had every done that before. To tell you the truth, I didn’t take any of those jobs with that in mind.

Monica: Your list of accomplishments is extensive. Do you believe you have fulfilled your purpose in life, or are there many other things you want to accomplish?

Monica: What would you say is your greatest contribution to the entertainment industry?

Monica: You’ve had a long and successful career within Hollywood. From your perspective, what does it take to make it in Hollywood?

Ms. Reese: I think what it takes to make it is the same in Cleveland, in Hollywood, in Georgia. You have to be you. See, I am – and I hope you can understand this and don’t find a lot of ego in this. I am unique.

There has never been another person made like me. So if you want what I’ve got, you have to come to me.

And I realized that way back with Mahalia, way back with my mother, way back with coming up. And so what I did was I had kept my connection with God, and I only tried to do things as me. Trends March-April 2011 | Exceptional People Magazine | 67

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didn’t bother me. Changes didn’t bother me. I was always presenting me. So since I’m the only one who is “the me,” that is what I would suggest for anybody else. Don’t go with every trend. Don’t try to be something that you’re not because you – all of us are unique individuals, and God has placed something in all of us that is absolutely ours. And if you work with that, the world has to accept it because there is no more like it.

other side two more about to rupture, and so he closed up. Ten days later, he opened up again and took care of those two. Ten days later I was doing a commercial for Campbell’s Soup.

Monica: You are 100 percent correct because I always say that each one of us has our own purpose.

Monica: What are some things in life that touch your heart the most?

Ms. Reese: Absolutely.

Ms. Reese: My family, my husband, my music.

My relationship with God is most touching. The things that he has done for me have made me know for sure -- not hope, not think, not wish -- but know for sure that he is consciously aware of me, and he’s taking care of me all the time. No matter how funky it looks, he’s got me to a place where I know that the fog will divide.

Monica: You suffered a stroke, I believe, while on the set of the Tonight Show. How did that affect your perspective on life at that time?

Ms. Reese: Everything that has happened has drawn me closer to where my mother has tried to take me in the first place. I had an aneurysm rupture in my brain while I was doing the Tonight Show, and I was supposed to be dead by all accounts before I hit the floor. That was in 1979, so I guess they made a mistake. What I remember is I was singing, and when it happened – and I don’t to this day know why I said this particular thing. I said, “Into Your hands I commit my spirit,” and then I was unconscious for three days.

Monica: How long did it take you to regain your health?

Monica: What a miracle.

Ms. Reese: Absolutely.

Monica: I know you put God first in your life and your family, but in addition to that, to what do you attribute your success as a singer, actress and now a minister?

Ms. Reese: All that I am today is because of my mother being a personal friend of God and giving me what I needed when I was crawling around on the floor as a child. She showed me – my mother was a Cherokee, and she was not much for giving direction. She showed me.

My father poured steel. My mother was a helpmate. She scrubbed floors and all, whatever was necessary to make enough for us to live. And I would hear her as she was scrubbing the floors say, “Did I get it clean, Father?” And if she stopped scrubbing and mopping, I thought God was saying to her, “Yeah, that’s clean enough.” If she continued to scrub, I thought he had told her that there was another spot to clean. So I just accepted that.

Ms. Reese: Well, I was in the hospital. I had X-rays; I had all the things that you were supposed to have, and I had a really spiritual situation. Spiritual things happened to me while I was waiting for a Della receiving her ministerial license doctor who was willing to from Dr. Johnnie Colemon, her menShe was a person who would not borrow operate. It took brain sur- tor and teacher. gery. Ten and a half hours because to borrow would be to say that for one surgery. And when he opened up to take care of your husband was not adequately taking care of one of the aneurysms that had ruptured, he saw on the you. He was not the man that he should have been.

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Extraordinary Profiles

We would be without something, and I would see her ask God for it, and I would see it appear. For example, we lived in an apartment, and at that time we had no refrigeration. We had what was called an icebox. You bought a block of ice and put it in this little wooden box.

It kept things cold that way. The money usually ran out Wednesday, no later than Thursday, and he didn’t get paid until Friday evening. And I have seen her sit in a yoga or Indian position with her legs crossed in front of her, and she would speak to God like I’m speaking to you. And I’ve heard her say, “Father, now I have enough to make a lunch for Rich” – that’s my father – “and enough to make for the baby” – that’s me – “to go to school. But I don’t have any bread, and I have to have something because you know my husband can’t go to work and have nothing to eat all day, and the baby’s got to have something at school, and I need some bread.

Would you please send me some bread?” The lady next door, who didn’t have any refrigeration either, would knock on the door and say, “Ms. Nellie, I bought a loaf of bread, and Allie Mae” – that was her sister – “bought a loaf of bread, and I don’t know what I’m going to do with all of this bread. I just hate to see it spoil. Would you take a loaf of this bread for me?”

My mother would be getting what she asked for and would be doing this lady next door a favor.

What I’m saying to you is it became a normal means. It wasn’t something that I had to get myself to learn to believe, to accept and to appreciate because I saw it happening.

Monica: You founded and are the Reverend of the Understanding Principles for Better Living Church. What gratifies you most about being a minister?

son once said that success means that we go to sleep at night knowing that our talents and abilities were used in a way that served others. What does success mean to you?

Ms. Reese: Success to me is prosperity, and prosperity is not necessarily just the money. If you can’t sleep and you have $12 million, you’re not prosperous. If you have no peace of mind, and you have all the money in the world, you are not prosperous. Prosperity is a part of love and joy and peace and understanding and wisdom and the ability to be who you are. So it’s not just what you accomplish. Success to me is who you are.

Monica: As you look back on all of your experiences, what are some of your most treasured moments?

Ms. Reese: I married the greatest man in the universe.

Monica: What would you say are keys necessary to have such a successful marriage?

Ms. Reese: Thank you. Please. I love you. I need you. I respect you. I want you. You thrill me.

Monica: Would you mind leaving your fans with a positive, uplifting thought?

Ms. Reese: God is good all the time, no matter how things look on the outside. God lives inside of us. They said he worked six days and then he rested. And where did he rest? He rested in me, and he rested in you so that we have the power, dominion and authority of God to be as magnificent as God is.

Ms. Reese: On Sundays we have a testimony service in the middle of our regular service.

We hear testimonies. And for somebody to stand up and say "I had this kind of a problem, and what I have learned" – I have a teaching ministry here. They would say, “I had this kind of a problem, but I don’t have that problem anymore because what I have learned here from you and the teachers in this church, I know exactly how to handle it,” or “I had a money problem. I don’t have it anymore. I know what to do. I have learned what to do.

My life is better.” All of that just turns me all the way on.

Monica: An author by the name of Marianne WilliamMarch-April 2011 | Exceptional People Magazine | 69

Jim Bouchard

The Black Belt Mindset

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Most of us know what karate is and what achieving a black belt in karate means, but do we really know how karate can be used to retrain the way we think, act and react to life’s foibles? Well, you don’t have to be a Black Belt in order to think like one.

Jim Bouchard has made it his life’s purpose to apply the Black Belt philosophy to help others achieve their best.

His resume is as colorful as a kaleidoscope. He’s done everything, from mopping floors, to writing and producing shows, selling hotdogs, pumping gas, playing semi-pro football and much more. But he (who also happens to be a Black Belt) knows firsthand that life can throw a curve ball at any moment and he’s been on the receiving end quite often.

Bouchard states, “I was a mess, to put it bluntly. Like a lot of people, I didn’t set out to be a drug abuser. Certainly, when I enrolled in college, it wasn’t my intention to quit, never

mind twice, but that’s part of my resume now. It’s nice to be able to look through the lens of hindsight. My life in martial arts has allowed me to go back and revisit that and do some work on myself. As I look back, I can certainly recognize times in my life, the low times, when I realize that the drugs and other behaviors like that were really trying to mask whatever I was trying either to avoid or not deal with. When people ask me how I got involved in martial arts, I’d say it was really to build some sort of self-worth.”

From his bad experiences come good intentions to help others transform their lives into success stories. Jim wants to help others take on the mindset of a black belt and begin realizing their true potential to achieve personal power.

According to Jim, there’s no life situation that can’t be overcome with the philosophy of the black belt mindset and he’s helping audiences across the country by sharing his message of

excellence, discipline, focus and opportunity.

He enthusiastically shared personal insights with Exceptional People Magazine.

Monica: You went through a period where you were on a cycle of selfdestructive behavior. Talk a little bit about some of the things you’ve done over your lifetime.

Jim: Yes. I was a mess, to put it bluntly. Like a lot of people, I didn’t set out to be a drug abuser. Certainly, when I enrolled in college, it wasn’t my intention to quit, never mind twice, but that’s part of my resume now. It’s kind of like the scalded frog syndrome. Sometimes when you’re at a low period in your life, you don’t really notice the cycle of destructive behavior swirling around you.

When I sunk my lowest it was the first time I had quit college. I believe at the time I was working in music, as well. So drugs were part of that cul-

Do You Have the Mindset of a Black Belt?

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ture. They were very accessible, easy to get. A lot of the people that I hung out with socially, they were all part of that culture.

I was also dealing drugs with some of my childhood friends. I didn’t have a very close relationship with my dad, and I’m not close with most of my family. My support system wasn’t really there. That’s a recipe for disaster. First of all, it was more or less something to do. It was a social activity. Somewhere along the line, I realized that I was also masking some of the pain, some of the self-doubt that I was feeling. That’s was my major issue.

It’s nice to be able to look through the lens of hindsight. My life in martial arts has allowed me to go back and revisit that and do some work on me.

As I look back, I can certainly recognize times in my life, the low times, when I realize that the drugs and other behaviors were really a mask for whatever I was trying to avoid.

When people ask me how I became involved in martial arts, I’d say it was to build self-worth.

It’s about appreciating that you have some meaning in other people’s lives, that what you’re doing with your life has some intrinsic value to others and to yourself.

Coming out of the drug period was difficult because for a long time it was very hard to see myself as past that. About that time is when I walked into the martial arts studio for the first time.

That’s kind of a neat story because it’s so reflective of my mindset at the time. Speaking of a low period, I had been off drugs for a while. I was still drinking heavily. My girlfriend left.

She took the car. She took the color TV that we had and ran away with a

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professional hockey player. My band was breaking up. I was working. I had a decent job, but I didn’t recognize it as such at the time. I viewed myself as an abject failure in every aspect that I could possibly think of.

So there I was, stuck in a lousy apartment in the middle of the city and not really seeing anywhere to go.

Early on in the journey, I realized what I was looking for from martial arts was the philosophical part of it.

The athletic part was okay, and I needed that to get healthy again, but it was really the philosophy behind it.

That leads us to what I’m trying to do today, just trying to share those basic components of what I call the black belt mindset. That is really about discipline, focus, self-motivation, courage and confidence, leadership and compassion.

Monica: You travel around the country speaking to various groups and individuals. What is the common denominator why people are not achieving the things that they set out to achieve?

Jim: That’s an interesting question. I don’t know that there’s one common theme. I’d have to say I probably get the most questions about discipline. A lot of people don’t see themselves as being very disciplined. More often than not, through a process of developing some awareness, I can show them that they’re probably more disciplined than they think they are.

Sometimes we look at other people, I believe, and we always see something better. The grass always looks greener on the other side. It’s usually not the case.

We should talk about success because one of the problems is that people have very strange definitions of success. Granted, it took me a long time to arrive at the definition that I use.

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And I’m so arrogant about it; I can say with every cell of my body I believe that this definition is the true one.

Success is really a product or feeling of abundance in three major areas of your life. You have to feel that you have enough in material, emotional and spiritual aspects of your life.

When you don’t feel you have enough in any one of those areas, then it’s very difficult to look at yourself and feel successful or to have any really genuine sense of self-worth. That’s certainly what I went through. In fact, that’s probably what I still continue to work on the most.

The other part of it is recognizing success. That’s a big problem I had in my life and something I try to help people overcome. I had a fairly nice music career, but I didn’t know it at the time. I was still in that cycle of selfloathing and self-destructive behavior.

So while all these great things were happening around me, I had what I call my Wayne’s World” moments. I kept saying, “I’m not worthy. I’m not worthy.” Later on I learned that no matter how modest your success is by other people’s standards, it’s very important to learn how to recognize it and to be aware of that. The only way you can do that really is through a process of understanding what gratitude is all about.

Monica: Do you believe that excellence is something that’s necessary in all things?

Jim: That’s the whole core of what I’m talking about with “Think Like a Black Belt.” If you had to sum up – and people do challenge me on this sometimes, but excellence is really an overarching concept that covers everything.

If we’re talking about discipline, then we talk about excellence in discipline.

If we’re talking about focus, we can talk about excellence there, performance, whatever. That’s another one where we have to be very careful about how it’s defined. I’m not going to measure excellence compared to other people. I had a wonderful master one time. He said, “When you compare yourself to others, you’re going to find that 50 percent of them are better than you, and 50 percent are worse.” That’s not bad advice.

Excellence is doing the best I can here and now with whatever resources I have here and now and moving it on from there.

Monica: Do you speak to corporate audiences as well?

same with you. I’m just going to ask you the question. What do you think about when you hear the words “black belt” or you see that symbol strapped around somebody’s waist?

Monica: I think about strength, determination and the desire to succeed at something.

Jim: Those are terrific concepts.

There are going to be some universals. At some point we’ll end up talking about discipline and focus and excellence. Everyone has a different take on it.

Monica: What words of wisdom and advice would you give? Of course, you’ve been on the very low end of

Jim: Yes. We do a lot of corporate audiences and conferences. We do a lot of work with entrepreneurs. They seem to really understand this message. Entrepreneurial people obviously are engaged in a process of selfperfection anyway.

That’s the energy.

Monica: Do you take a different approach with corporate audiences versus the approach that you take with your general audiences?

Jim: Somewhat, but again, these concepts are so universal. In fact, I like to play around when I’m on television or radio interviews. I’ll do the March-April 2011 | Exceptional People Magazine | 73

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life when you were going through a period of drugs, alcohol and other things. Let’s say, for example, a homeless person who has been on the streets for years -- they have no hope and can’t envision themselves going anywhere. What would you say to inspire that individual?

Jim: It’s going to be a disappointing answer, but I’m a realist. Again, this is where I’m not one of these guys who’s going to go out and say I can do much of anything to rev somebody up to change their life. The best we can do, any of us, is to share. I heard this beautiful saying, “The greatest gift you can give another person is your attention.”

Monica: It sometimes seems that we are a nation of people who want to live the good life but oftentimes don’t want to do what it takes to achieve it.

How do we go about kicking the mindset that everything should be easy?

Jim: That’s when you need people like me and Larry Winget. Larry is a dear friend. There’s been too much coddling, and I’ve done it myself. I’ve expected it myself, to be honest with you. We’ve sugarcoated a lot of

things. We’ve moved to a society that – we’ve elevated political correctness to a point where we can’t even communicate anymore. At the same time we’ve become so hypersensitive that– some vulgar words should be stripped from the language or made dormant anyway, but we’ve become so hypersensitive to these things that we can’t even have a dialogue about the issue that the word represents in the first place, so that’s become very, very dangerous.

We need respectful dialogue, but we need to be more honest. To that end, we need a kick in the tail once in a while. We’ve become, as a culture, so complacent.

Monica: You say that perfection is not a destination but a never-ending process. Do you believe that perfection can be achieved by anyone?

Jim: Yes. That’s what that whole statement is about. It’s a mind shift.

To me, that’s the important part of a mind shift because shifting your mindset by itself doesn’t do anything.

You have to put it into action. It’s very important to shift your mindset, especially if you’re in a period of negativity or depression.

Monica: I think it’s a lesson for so many young people who want to achieve success. They need to know that the people who are at the top of their game have failed before they got to where they are.

Jim: They have, haven’t they, the authentic ones?

Those who really fall off the ivory tower are the ones who have never really dealt with adversity. Sometimes they end up becoming crooks.

They want the easy way. You’re right. We’ve inoculated our young

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people against adversity, and that’s a huge disservice. There’s been a movement the last few years to not have valedictorians at graduations because it’s going to make other kids feel bad.

My response is what are you talking about? Look at that kid and say, “Wow. I can aspire to that.” If a kid can’t aspire to that academically, you’re going to find some talent and ability where that kid can shine.

Monica: Why is the black belt mindset so important today? How can politicians and business leaders use that mindset to solve some of the major problems that we have today?

Jim: Don’t I wish I could present to Congress because there are fundamental values and characteristics that we absolutely must have. A lot of the failures we’re seeing as a culture and as a society – I’m an optimist, but I’m a realistic optimist. We’re at a crossroads right now, and unless we get our act together, we’re going to be in a lot of trouble. It is a huge underlying theme we haven’t even touched on. Throughout this whole mindset there needs to be the value of respect.

Monica: Who have been some major influences on your life?

Jim: Jack Canfield and Steven Covey. Mohammed Ali actually is a huge, huge influence for two reasons.

I obviously identify with him as a fighter, but his ability to articulate his ideas on such a human level was so inspirational to me. Napoleon Hill, whose work right now is so misunderstood – he brought out the idea of the law of attraction. People have just beaten that to death.

They’ve turned him into some kind of crystal you hang around your neck instead of understanding what he meant, which is exactly what we’ve

Extraordinary Profiles

been talking about, the hard work that it takes to change yourself, to go out there and make yourself more attractive.

Some of the great Asian philosophers, Lao Tzu and Sun Tzu, the Dalai Lama from India – he’s from India now, from Tibet originally. I love him because to me he’s a real teacher. He’s funny. He’s a real human being, and he shows that side. Some names that people wouldn’t know -- one of my teachers, Dr. Yong Jeung Ming was a tremendous influence for me. He was my tai chi and Qigong teacher, again, a very human person, someone you could sit down and laugh and joke with. He understood that a life of discipline isn’t a life without fun and joy.

Those are some of the folks that influenced me. Those are some of the big ones.

Monica: If there were any one or maybe two things that you could go back in time and do over, what would they be?

Jim: I don’t know that I would change anything now because I can’t imagine myself in a different place.

Part of that goes back to gratitude. It would be very easy for me to go back and say, “Okay. If I wasn’t a drug addict, this would have happened. If I didn’t let myself get into poverty, that would have happened. If I didn’t let myself get into debt, this would have happened.” All of that is part of the experience, is part of what made me who I am now, and it’s part of shaping who I’m going to become tomorrow. I can honestly say that it would take an awful lot of temptation to go back and want to change something. I can’t imagine any kind of reward or temptation off the top of my head that would make me want to do that. I don’t know if that’s a cop-out or not.

Having said that, sometimes have I had moments where I said, “I wish life were easier.” Well, yeah, everybody goes through that. I don’t think I would change anything from the past.

I’m continually trying to change things now. Asian philosophy teaches us this. The only place we can have any effect on our lives is the present moment. The past is a memory. The future is a dream. The present moment lasts forever. This is the time and the space where we’re working on whatever we want. So if we’re making amends for the past, we’re doing it right now, in the present. If we’re trying to create the future, we’re doing it right now.

of self-perfection again. As long as you’re continually working on yourself to improve yourself and you embrace that as your life’s mission, then you’re continually expanding your power.

Monica: Your last word?

Jim: The most important thing they could take away from me is this -Perfection is not a destination. It’s a never-ending process. Enjoy it. That’s it in a nutshell.

Monica: Lots of people, of course, talk about achieving personal power and how important it is to achieve it.

How do you define personal power?

Jim: That’s what I tried to do in my first book, “Dynamic Components of Personal Power.” The definition I found that works the best ironically came out of the dictionary. It’s your ability or capacity to perform or act effectively. The ironic thing is hardly anybody understands or even knows that definition. People confuse power with control. They confuse power with being able to manipulate other people. That’s not what it is at all.

The flip side of that is people confuse money with power or knowledge with power.

I don’t believe money or knowledge is power at all. If they were, all intelligent and wealthy people would be powerful. We know that’s not true.

We know some very weak people that are intelligent and wealthy. No stupid or desperate people would be powerful, and we know that’s not true.

Once we understand that it’s our capacity – now we’re back to that idea

Listen to the full interview in the subscriber’s area at: www.exceptionalmag.com

March-April 2011 | Exceptional People Magazine | 75

Martha Endum Teke

At 13, she became the youngest student to graduate from Saker Baptist College, in Limbe Cameroon. The faith-based values of this Christian school have allowed Martha Endum Teke to become the articulate, passionate and well-focused individual that she has become today. Armed with these values, she was ready to pursue her passion to become a medical doctor.

She began her journey to become a doctor in America when she was admitted to Texas A&M Health Science Center. At age 15, Martha Endum began learning how to adjust to her new home at College Station where she would first pursue a degree in nursing.

Living alone off campus, cooking her meals and doing her own laundry was an extraordinary load to bear, in addition to taking on a full course load. To help ease the load her mom, Martha, delivered meals and laundered her clothes.

Intelligence, Dedication and Drive

At age 17, Martha Endum Teke, became the second youngest graduate from a university nursing program in the United States. She joined Danielle McBurnett in accomplishing this major feat.

Her success is derived from intelligence, determination, discipline, her parent’s foresight and the teachers who supported and believed in her ability to succeed.

The old saying goes “It takes a village to raise a child.” Martha Endum shared her sentiments with Exceptional People Magazine about what it means to be a model student who was groomed by her parents, teachers and the Cameroonian community, as well as her Texas A&M family.

Monica: Tell me where you grew up and what life was like.

Extraordinary Profiles

Martha: Well, I was born in Erie, Pennsylvania. I was nine when I left. When I was in school, whenever we took exams, they would place me a little bit higher.

My mom is an alumnus of the school I went to in Cameroon, and she has always wanted me to go there regardless of how old I was. But since they were placing me in those higher classes, she would say, “Oh, well, let’s just try.” If they transferred me to Cameroon, it would be the class I was supposed to skip into. “Let me try sending her there and see how it goes.” So they sent me there, and thank God, God protected me and everything went well, and I finished my five years. And then I came here to community college because my parents weren’t comfortable with me going into a big university.

Monica: So you went to grade school before you went to Cameroon?

Martha: Third grade.

Monica: Why did your parents want you to attend school in Cameroon?

Martha: Well, their main thing was they had always wanted me to go because they wanted me to learn about the culture. They wanted me to be grounded. They wanted me to be a well-rounded person because sometimes when you’re here, you don’t really get to see a lot of what happens around the world. So they wanted me to understand some of those things and also know the other side of my family because I also have a lot of family in Cameroon as well which I wasn’t too close to because they’re on the other side of the ocean.

So it was just a mixture of family, learning values, just a lot of things that, since they went through that system and saw how beneficial it was to their lives coming here, they said, “Well, we’ll send our daughter also.”

But in Cameroon – the difference, I think, is in terms of discipline, in terms of respect, in terms of a lot of things, and then it was a school where they loved to sing. They invested in singing, so everybody there that came out of that school had to sing. So with discipline – in that school your teacher has the right to discipline you. Your teacher has the right to do anything. Your teacher is like your second dad, so you tend to respect your teachers. When I came here, people were calling their teachers by their first names.

I was like, “Oh, my gosh.”

It’s not just about your teacher but everybody that’s older than you. There is hierarchy in the school, just like in the army. It’s pretty much like a military setting. The higher you go the more respect you get, so it was based on respect.

It was based on discipline.

Here, in terms of school, you can never tell a child’s grades to their parents if they’re in college. In Cameroon, on the other hand, they read your grades in front of the whole class. Yes, from bottom to top. So if you wanted to keep your image alive, you were going to pass.

At that point it’s not like you’re doing it for your parents anymore. In that setting, you’re doing it for yourself.

You’re doing it because you believe, if I’m the person who flunked the class, everybody would know.

Monica: Is it part of the culture? Is it something that continues today?

Martha: It is done today. Everything is public. All of your grades are publicized. There are no silent grades in Cameroon. Here they say, “Well, it causes people psychological problems,” but it’s an incentive to do your stuff for real.

You’re not looking at other things; you’re looking at yourself and comparing your standing among your peers.

Monica: From third grade to going to Cameroon, what differences did you notice or how would you compare the U.S. to Cameroon in terms of education?

Martha: Oh, my goodness. There is so much comparison. I have to say, first of all, that my school was a Christian school, number one. And my school here was a Christian school also. So it wasn’t like I was taught about God in one school versus another. I was taught about God in both of the schools, which I think that’s basic. God is my basis.

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Extraordinary Profiles

And that makes you want to strive harder. There are just a lot of facets where it’s so different. They’re very big on, I would say, respect, discipline, values. You had things built into every day. You had morning devotions, which was a morning sermon, and evening sermon. It was very much built around building values, learning about God, discipline and respect and learning how to be a better person.

ple with your right hand. You don’t take things with your left hand. But talking back? Your punishment would be outrageous.

I think just that discipline and respect -- it’s so important if you’re growing up because it’s needed in the world.

It’s needed when you’re striving for things. You need to respect the person above you, and you need to respect the person below you. And I believe that’s what I was taught.

and you would till the farm alone without mechanical tools.

You use a hoe and your manpower, and you will make that farm work. Or you scrub, or do some sort of manual labor that, by the end of the day, you feel like all the energy that you have is gone. It is pretty much that way.

Meanwhile, here, your teacher comes to class and basically it’s like, “I’m coming here to just teach you what I need to teach.” In Cameroon your teacher is like, the parents have sent this kid to this school, and I have become the parent now. So they basically take over the parenting role and they discipline every child. They discipline you, and they talk to you. It’s not like it’s just my job to teach. It’s my job to encourage you. It’s my job to push you forward. It’s my job to tell you where you went wrong. It’s my job to tell you where you went right.

Our school is an all-girls school and they didn’t want you to have to care for anything. So we had short hair, shorter than boys’ hair, because if you had short hair, you didn’t have to think of caring for it and you were not impressing anybody. You were there to be schooled. And also your earrings had to be really tiny, no big earrings. Your nails had to be very short. You had to be neat. There were three sets of uniforms that you wore, one in the morning, one in the afternoon and one for church.

Monica: Speaking of punishments, what punishments do they give for unruly kids?

Martha: All kinds of things. Some kids become unruly at the end of the day. You can be whipped. They have a farm,

Monica: It sounds like it was very structured.

Monica: They don’t have issues with kids talking back?

Martha: Oh, no, ma’am. Oh, my. You talk back, Ms. Monica? Oh, my goodness.

First of all, they ask you, “Who are you?” They ask you, “Who are you to talk to me?” You don’t even greet people with your left hand. You greet peo78 | Exceptional People Magazine | March-April 2011

Martha: That structure, when you’re going through it, you hate it. But coming out of it, I see that structure has helped me go through life better. I have time to study and I also have time to relax.

Monica: So it allows you to be independent.

Martha: Yes. I don’t live with anyone. A lot of people are surprised about that. But from living there without my fam-

Extraordinary Profiles

ily, it’s not too different. The only thing I don’t have is all the girls who I can talk to.

Monica: In addition to studying nursing, were you interested in any extracurricular activities?

In Cameroon you learn how to take care of yourself.

Your first year, you have a senior person who is in charge of you, and they help you get integrated into the system.

From the second year onward, you’re on your own. And you wash your clothes yourself. You do everything by yourself. And pretty much all they do is provide food and education and church to you. You do all those things.

Here it’s not much different. You do everything by yourself, so you become independent.

Martha: Yes, because nursing can become boring when you stay with it a lot. I was the fundraising officer for The African Students Association here at Texas A&M.

Monica: At age 15, you began living on your own.

What was that experience like?

Martha: Well, props to my mom because she helped me go a long way because – she brought me food every two weeks, so I didn’t really have to think of cooking a lot.

For the first few months, she washed my clothes. She would come from Dallas to College Station, take my clothes, wash them in Dallas and bring them back in two weeks. So she really was a vital part of that.

The first days I was kind of scared but I got used to it. I got used to the town. I have a wonderful church family here. They all call me and they’re really nice. It’s been fun meeting new people and friends.

Monica: You graduated from Texas A&M at the age of 17 and you are a nurse. What is your next goal?

Martha: I’m a nurse now but ultimately, I want to be a doctor. College Station is a very small town consisting of A&M University completely. Without A&M, College Station would not be. So the hospital in College Station is tied into the school itself, the medical school here. What I am doing right now is sharpening my skills as a nurse and also trying to develop connections at the hospital.

I’m taking full-time classes in the fall, spring and summer in preparation for med school.

Monica: What inspired you to study nursing?

Martha: To be honest, my whole family is in the medical field. My mom is a nurse. My dad is a nurse. So I was exposed to it. But the philosophy behind that was, if I’m in the setting, I would know if I wanted to do that or not.

Being the fundraising officer was really fun because I had never held a position of leadership until that point. I love kids, so I did a lot of church volunteer work with kids. I also was part of a bible study group.

I did a lot of things through my position as the fundraising officer because I had to communicate with representatives from various companies. It was pretty time-consuming because of the connections you can establish by talking to people.

Monica: How successful were you as a fundraiser?

Martha: Well, not to toot anything, but I raised the most money during my year. I think I raised close to $6 or $7,000. Other people in past years raised something like $4,000.

Monica: Based on your experiences in Cameroon and the structure in Cameroonian classrooms, what words of advice and or encouragement can you give students in America?

Martha: The only person that will stop you is you. Don’t limit yourself, because others will try to limit you. If you don’t limit yourself, ultimately, they can’t limit you. So no matter what things people use to set boundaries -- “Oh, I’m African-American, or I’m a woman”-those are the kinds of limitations you may allow people to put on you. If you don’t put limitations on yourself, no one can limit you. Strive as hard as you can because you can do it. If you can think it, you can do it.

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Extraordinary Profiles

how did they do that.” I don’t think they’re really extraordinary people they’re just ordinary people who thought they could do extraordinary things.

own drive and you say, “I’m doing this for myself. If I want to be a better person or reach this place or this goal, then I have to do what I need to do.”

Yes, some people have privileges but it’s your drive. And for me I would personally say that God is the foundation.

I mean for the children of America, not everybody believes in God. But if you put it in God’s hands, for me He ultimately has the earth, so he will direct you in the right path.

I think I’m still striving for a lot of good qualities. The people around me helped me get where I am. There are some teachers and there are some friends I had in College Station that, if they weren’t there, I can almost promise you that I wouldn’t be talking to you right now. Those kinds of things – that really touched me because I had always depended on my parents. Coming here, I was still depending on my parents financially, but they weren’t always there psychologically and emotionally. So those friends that I made were really nice. Even in Cameroon, it was the same thing. I think I made my best friends in Cameroon because you live with them practically every day.

Monica: Do you have any brothers or sisters?

Martha: Yes. I call him my heart. He is my little brother.

He’s six years old. He is just an amazing – I can’t wait to see what he’ll become because I know he’ll do something really big. He’s six years old, and he’s going into first grade this year. And he’s just an amazing kid, very excited about everything that he does, very smart. He is by far smarter than I was at his age. And he is very outgoing. I’m happy that he’s my brother, really thankful.

Monica: What area of medicine are you interested in?

Martha: I want to become an internal medicine, general surgery doctor.

Monica: What advice do you have for American students to change their attitudes concerning education and respect?

Martha: If you don’t establish a foundation by being respectful and doing what you need to do in school and in all other areas, then you’re going to slip very fast. If you’re interested in school, if you’re getting good grades, you’re doing it to improve yourself.

Your parents want you to be a better person because at the end of the day, when they let go, they don’t want to see their kids fall.

They want you to become successful, and that’s why they push you so hard.

But by pushing yourself, that’s when you find your 80 | Exceptional People Magazine | March-April 2011

Monica: Do you believe that you have been blessed with a gift?

Martha: I think I’ve been blessed personally. But when people tell me, “Oh, my God, you’re special,” I respond that I don’t think I’m all that special. I think I’m just a normal person who has been blessed by God. And that’s why God is my strength because I’m like, “Okay, God. Truth be told, I cannot do this without you.” So I don’t know if I have any particular gift. I just think that my gift is just God being my dad and he taking me through all of this because there have been a lot of hard times where my parents weren’t there and all I could do was cry.

But I think God helped me through that and put me with the right people and in the right environment. But I don’t think that there is any special gift or any special thing.

There were doors that opened that I could not open. So it’s just like okay. Every day I’m just like, “Where are you going to take me next?” “What do you have for me next?”

Inspiration

Inspiration

Be determined to win the race set before you

By Catherine Galasso-Vigorito

The temperature climbed to over 100 degrees.

Outside it was oppressively humid and muggy.

hardships, Wilma refused to give up and worked through her countless obstacles.

But regardless of the weather, day after day, this young athlete kept going, forging on, running extensive distances, her strides long and fast.

Do we shrink back in fear when we are faced with challenges?

She was an Olympic track and field hopeful. And with every step, as she vigorously trained, I can imagine her saying to herself, “I will live up to my full potential,” “I am going to try my best to win.” And then, increasing her pace, pushing as hard as she could, she had probably uttered, “I’m not going to allow my past setbacks to ruin my hope for the future.”

The athlete progressed forward, sprinting, running, jumping, and squinting into the hot sun I’m sure tears must have dropped from out of her eyes and onto the heat of the charcoal-colored pavement, as she thought back on her struggles.

How many of us have shed tears over our past?

Born prematurely in 1940 into a poor family in the south, I read that Wilma Rudolph spent the early years of her life plagued by illnesses. Polio left her partially paralyzed and she was unable to walk without the aid of a metal brace.

The young girl fought physical disabilities, pain and poverty, and was often discarded. People most likely thought she wouldn’t have much of a future. Yet, despite hurts and 82 | Exceptional People Magazine | March-April 2011

Or have we listened to others who may negatively say, “You’ll never amount to anything?” Perhaps, we come up with excuses, thinking we are ‘not good enough’ have ‘too many limitations,’ or ‘problems’ to succeed.

Wilma did not center her attention on unconstructive predictions or her limitations, for innately she must have known how that negativity could have intensified their power over her. Instead, with remarkable courage and determination, Wilma focused on her strengths and her dreams and goals.

After years of therapy, Wilma removed her leg brace and little by little, was able to regain the use of her leg.

Thereafter, she desperately wanted to play high school basketball, and she developed into a fine player. As destiny would have it, unexpectedly, Wilma attracted the attention of a college track and field coach. “You have potential to be a great runner,” the coach encouraged. He knew this talented young lady was a natural athlete, so he formed a girls’ track team. Soon, Wilma began setting records and leading her team to victory.

Inspiration

others deem probable. So keep at it! You can bring about your goals. Thus, set your heart and mind on your achievements and persevere. Scripture says, to “run with endurance the race which is set before us.” (Hebrews 12:1). For the hills and valleys that you are passing through are not designed to stop you, but to strengthen you.

I am reminded of the life of Job in the Bible. In the story, it tells how Job lost almost everything that was valuable to him. Yet, despite his afflictions, Job never lost his faith or dependence on God. And, in Job 42:12 it explains that, “the Lord blessed the latter end of Job ‘more’ than his beginning.” The dictionary defines ‘more’ as being ‘a greater or additional quantity.’ In other words, the Lord brought about and gave Job ‘more’ at the end of his life than Job had at the beginning.

Accordingly, your future is brighter than your past and wonderful days are to come.

Then, in 1960, Wilma Rudolph represented the United States in the Olympic Games. Her extraordinary performances made history! Wilma established a world record, as she won three gold metals in track and field, being called one of the “fastest women in the world.’ Moreover, through her autobiography, television movie, motivational speeches, foundation, and work as a school teacher, she imparted the lessons that she learned onto others, making Wilma Rudolph a true inspiration.

Today, take one step on the road to your aspirations. Just start, begin. Persist with focused determination. After that, take a second step, toward your heart’s desires. Then another… moving ahead to the divine destiny that God has beautifully prepared for you. Keep your eyes on Him. And before you know it, as long as you refuse to give up, you’ll triumphantly cross the finish line in first place!

I like the old proverb that says, “The stronger the wind, the mightier the oak becomes.”

No matter where you were raised. Despite disadvantages, disabilities or lack, like Wilma Rudolph, you, too, can rise above difficulties, to grasp and claim an extraordinary life.

Is there something in your life that is holding you back?

At this moment, make the decision to get beyond what is hindering you.

Remember, there is always hope. And just because things haven’t worked out entirely for you up until now, it doesn’t mean you won’t find great success in the future.

Therefore, do not quit!

You’re able to go further than you think is possible. Just try. There will be plenty of people who say, ‘No, it can’t be done,’ but act anyway. You are capable of more than March-April 2011 | Exceptional People Magazine | 83

Don’t forget! In the key of C. All together now, a one, a two, a three...

Sounds more like the key of H. Oh, the horror.

The Lighter Side

Whatever! It all sounds cool to me.

Lighter Side

HOME-SPAM WISDOM

by Angie Brennan

Most of the time I delete them without a second thought. When you see an e-mail from “Georgia Gorganzola Grambling,” it’s pretty clear you’re dealing with spam. But every once in a while, with my finger hovering over “delete,” I’ll let the words of the subject line really sink in.

For example, I recently received an e-mail with the following subject line: “Cremation Loudness.” Whoa. Was this a call to face, if only for a moment, the screaming reality of our own mortality that we are so often quick to suppress? Was it suggesting that cremation, with its vivid and terrifying imagery of burning, is psychologically “louder” than traditional burial? No, it wasn’t. It was an invitation to buy software at deeply discounted prices. Still, it made one think.

Or another: “Your mother has always dreamed of having sweet grandkids.” What wisdom could this subject line impart to me? Do I need to step back and consider my children’s character development more carefully? Should I spend more time encouraging them to be kind and thoughtful than encouraging them to get good grades? Should I focus on that which will remain long after they’re done grappling with geometry proofs and book reports? Probably. But the sender would be just as happy if I would take advantage of their special offer for two-color premium business cards; sale ends Friday.

This one had a thought-provoking subject line; it simply said “Medication that you need.” Perhaps this sentence fragment was a commentary on the overmedicating of America…a call to consider alternatives to pills, such as lifestyle and diet changes, homeopathic remedies, or simply good, old-fashioned self control. Which medicines do we truly need? Whatever they are, the sender was more than willing to sell them. Along with a few of the ones we probably don’t need.

So many nuggets of wisdom in my inbox….“Don’t miss that store,” (suggesting, perhaps, that the disappearance of the mom ‘n pop shop due to the “Wal-Mart effect” is an economic reality that will have to be faced and dealt with); “Enjoy the newest but without any results,” (a helpful reminder that the latest technology won’t always make us more productive); “roly-poly acid rain,” (beats me, but intriguing all the same. Would also make a pretty good title for a song).

There was one more subject line that caught my attention: “Do you have power?” Well, do I? Do I have confidence enough in myself that I can achieve my goals despite setbacks and nay-sayers?

Do I have the moral strength to---uh, hold on a minute. That e-mail was from my mother asking whether we still had electricity after a recent storm. So, yes, I do have power in that sense.

At any rate, the next time you scan your inbox and note the bizarre and often grammatically unsound subject lines, take a moment to consider what truths they may hold for you. Just don’t click on any links. Unless the e-mail is from your mother, who, no doubt, has always dreamed of having sweet grandkids.

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Lighter Side

Communicating or at least trying to: In an East African Newspaper: A new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers.

In a Rome laundry: Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.

In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency: Take one of our horse-driven city tours. We guarantee no miscarriages.

An advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: Would you like to take a ride on your own ass?

Detour sign in Kyshi, Japan: Stop: Drive sideways.

On a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong: Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life.

In a Tokyo bar: Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.

Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance: English well talking. Here speeching American.

From a brochure by a car rental firm in Tokyo: When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage, then tootle him with vigor.

At a Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.

In a Tokyo shop: Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run.

In the window of a Swedish furrier: Fur coats made from your own skin.

In a office of a Roman doctor: Specialist in men and other diseases.

86 | Exceptional People Magazine | March-April 2011

Lighter Side

The Lighter Side of Silly Science Actual answers given by 16-year-olds on tests: Name the four seasons: Salt, pepper, mustard, and vinegar.

How is water made fit to drink? Flirtation makes it safe because it removes pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep, and canoeists.

How is dew formed? The sun shines down on leaves and makes them perspire.

What causes tides in the oceans? Tides are a fight between the Earth and the moon. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

A cop stopped this kid for speeding and told him, "I've been waiting for you all day!" "Yeah?" the kid replied," I got here as fast as I could." When he stopped laughing, the cop let him go.

What are steroids? Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

How do you delay milk from turning sour? Keep it in the cow.

What is a fibula? A small lie.

What is a seizure? A Roman Emperor.

What is a terminal illness? It's when you get sick at the airport.

What does "varicose" mean?

Nearby.

Corny Joke Moe: "Why were you running up the street?"

Joe: "I was trying to stop a fight."

Moe: "Who was fighting?"

Joe: "Me and another guy."

March-April 2011 | Exceptional People Magazine | 87

Lighter Side

WORRYING YOURSELF TO BETTER HEALTH AND LONGER LIFE

By Dorothy Rosby

Someone very wise once said, most of what we worry about never even happens. That has been my experience also. And, that is precisely why I worry: IT WORKS!

Actually, I have used this method fairly effectively for many years—all except the stopping part. For my worrying time, I set aside the hours between midnight and morning.

Plenty of bad things I didn't have the wisdom and foresight to worry about HAVE happened. I wasn't worrying when the airline lost my luggage. I wasn't worrying when I got food poisoning on my vacation. And I wasn't worrying when another driver ran a red light, totaled my car and landed me in the emergency room.

Or, at least, I wasn't worrying about THOSE things. I now try to worry about them a little bit each day, and, not coincidentally, none of them has happened since.

Non-worriers also recommend you ask yourself trite little questions about what's bothering you. "Is this really going to matter in ten years?" Like there won't be plenty of other things to worry about in ten years. And, they'll probably be bigger. Or, "What's the worse thing that could happen," a question I’m sure they found great solace in at the Alamo.

Despite its effectiveness in preventing accident, injury, and even death, non-worriers are forever trying to persuade worriers to stop worrying so much. Much has been written on the subject: "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living," "Kicking the Worry Habit," and my personal favorite, "Worrying: Robbing Life from Your Years and Years from Your Life." (I know that makes me feel less anxious.)

Predictably, all of the above were written by nonworriers. People who never did worry much. People whose idea of worrying is wondering, as they doze off to sleep, if they turned the thermostat down. People who can rest during dental work. What do they know about worry or its many benefits?

Non-worriers tell us to "set aside" time to worry. In other words, pencil in the word "fretting" on your calendar from, say, 7 to 8 p.m. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Then, when 7 o'clock rolls around, go to it.

Scan the horizon for pending disasters. Worry, brood, fuss, stew, then do it again. And, when your time is up, stop! It’s as easy as that. Just stop.

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Anyone who finds that question comforting simply lacks imagination. And a good imagination really is the key to effective worrying. Who else but a real hand wringing, blood-sweating worrier can fret about the safety of people they've never met and illnesses they’re showing no symptoms of? Which leads me to a final tip from the non-worrying crowd: They suggest we write about our worries as a cheap form of therapy, get them down on paper and out of our system. Maybe they have a point.

With imaginations like ours, we may be able to channel our worries into suspense novels or horror movie scripts.

Still, there is so much in life to worry about that I sometimes lay awake worrying that I may be worrying too much. I'm working on finding a balance, cutting back just enough to save my sanity without jeopardizing my safety. But I definitely do not recommend you stop worrying altogether.

In fact, on those rare occasions when we aren't worrying, serious worriers worry that we may be missing something. If things are going too well, we worry it can't last.

And, if we sleep too well at night, we worry we won't hear an intruder.

Profile Resources Part One Christopher Fomunyoh, Pg. 4, Setting the Stage for Africa’s Democracy http://www.tffcam.org, http://www.ndi.org/ Sonja Fisher, Pg. 12, Promoting Women in Technology http://www.sonjafisher.com/ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9IYFBA76au8&feature=related http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUuiIfyRMw0&feature=related Sarfo Abebrese, Pg. 18, Unifying Africa Through the Universal Sport of Soccer http://www.cosua2010.com Cori Maedel, Pg. 26, Effectively Managing Your Business http://jouta.com/ Rebel Brown, Pg. 34, Rebelizing the Way Entrepreneurs Do Business http://www.rebelbrown.com Amy Nakos, Pg. 40, Changing Restrictive Thought Processes http://www.mindredesign.com Cover Photo Credits Christopher Fomunyoh— Dupont Photographers Rebel Brown—Sherry Lingle, Liquid Steel Photography Sarfo Abebrese—Karen Crowder, Timeless Photography, L.L.C. Amy Nakos—Katie Girtman, Studio Kiva Other Photo Credits Sonja Fisher—Pg. 12, Shandon, Amazing Headshots, shandon@amazingheadshots.com Pg. 15, bottom photo—Robert Kardanzian, kazphoto@earthlink.net Pg. 15 upper photo—Kevyn Major Howard Amy Nakos—Pg. 40, Katie Girtman, Studio Kiva; Pg. 44—Signature Portraits, Samantha Kosch

Part Two Della Reese, Pg. 64, A Legend Among Stars http://www.upchurch.org Jim Bouchard, Pg. 70, The Black Belt Mindset http://jimbouchard.org Cover Photo Credits Della Reese—Courtesy of Cliff Lipson for CBS Additional Credits Graphics: Jeff Hayes, http://www.plasmafiregraphics.com

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Sharon Raiford Bush West Coast Bureau Chief

King, Charlie Rich, Willie Nelson and Stevie Ray Vaughan.

Sharon called upon actors Blair Underwood and Ronny Cox; American race car driver Dale Earnhardt, Sr.; and wrestling champion Randy Savage, among others, to help her raise money to feed and clothe thousands of impoverished children throughout the Carolinas.

She worked side-by-side with President Jimmy Carter and First Lady Rosalynn Carter in helping to establish the Carolinas' inaugural Habitat for Humanity project. The first home built in that area contains nails and lumber put in place by Sharon, actress/activist Jane Fonda and a host of other volunteers.

Multi-award-winning journalist Sharon Dahlonega Raiford Bush helms our West Coast Bureau, located in Los Angeles, CA. Sharon is best known for being the nation's first African-American female TV weather anchor of prime time news. It was an honor bestowed upon her by President Gerald R. Ford when WGPR-TV began broadcasting in Detroit, MI. The former freedom fighter, who participated in peaceful civil rights demonstrations as a child with Rev. Jesse Jackson, Sr., further helped desegregate news anchor desks for ABC, CBS and NBC affiliates in North Carolina and Tennessee.

Sharon is a dedicated public servant.

She co-hosted the St. Jude Children's Hospital's annual telethon with Danny Thomas to raise money for cancer research and treatment.

To help Memphis, Tennessee's struggling blues community, she executive-produced the National Blues Music Awards, a stellar show that brought together the exceptional and collective talent of B.B. King, Albert 90 | Exceptional People Magazine | March-April 2011

Sharon's contributions to American history have been archived by the Charles H. Wright African American Museum in Detroit, and the Smithsonian Institution in Washington, DC. She provides Exceptional People Magazine with uplifting stories about artists who are giving back to their communities and making a difference in the world around them.

“I delve far beyond the reaches of entertainers' resumes and lists of credits,” said Raiford Bush. “I want to know what makes them tick, what really makes them an exceptional human being.”

She is married to veteran actor, Grand L. Bush, the recipient of the 1994 Gil Garcetti Courageous Citizen Award for saving the life of a shooting victim.

Most recently, Sharon helped organize the Donald Trump Celebrity Invitational Golf Classic and Awards Banquet to raise money for the Salvation Army's youth-oriented programs.

Contact Sharon by sending an email to: EpmagWest@aol.com.

Writers and Contributors

William R. Patterson

Annemarie Cross

Ranked as the #1 Business Motivational Speaker by Ranking.com, William R. Patterson is a three-time award-winning lecturer and international bestselling author who uses his trademark approach, THE BARON SOLUTION™, to coach, train, and motivate business leaders, sales professionals, entrepreneurs, and investors. His breakthrough book, The Baron Son, has been translated around the world and featured in the Forbes Book Club and Black Enterprise. William is an internationally recognized wealth and business coach who has been a featured guest on over 500 television and radio programs.

William's website, BaronSeries.com, is winner of four 2009 Web Awards including: Best Speaker; Best Male Author; Best Business Advice Site; and Best WealthBuilding Site. For more information, visit http://www.baronseries.com

Annemarie Cross is a Career Management & Personal Branding Strategist, Speaker, Consultant, Radio Broadcaster, and Author of ’10 Key Steps to Ace that Interview!’ She is also the founder/ principal of Advanced Employment Concepts – Career Management and Corporate Career Development Specialists offering powerful programs for people striving for career success and fulfillment, as well as savvy companies committed to building and retaining their most important asset – their staff.

Widely considered a personal change agent and success catalyst, Annemarie has distinguished herself as being people-focused, caring, inspirational and life-changing in her approach. Annemarie can be contacted at www.a-e-c.com.au email: info@a-e-c.com.au.

Catherine Galasso-Vigorito

James Adonis

Catherine Galasso-Vigorito’s nationally syndicated weekly column, “A New You,” has endeared her to readers worldwide for over 15 years.

James Adonis is a people-management thinker and the author of three books including his latest, ‘Corporate Punishment: Smashing the Management Clichés for Leaders in a New World’. Thought-provoking and entertaining, James's keynote presentations and workshops show companies how to solve staff turnover, engage all generations, and win the war for talent. He has presented to audiences across Australia, Europe, Asia, and the Middle East, with an impressive list of clients including McDonald's, American Express, CocaCola, Qantas, and Gucci. www.jamesadonis.com.

Known for her ability to uplift and encourage, Catherine has become America’s most beloved inspirational voice.

Catherine is the founder and CEO of her own company, A New You Worldwide, developing and designing inspirational products. Her mission is to instill hope in the hearts of people everywhere, inspiring them to live a better life. She makes her home on the East Coast with her husband and three daughters.

Visit her website at www.anewyouworldwide.com Searching for inspirational gifts - visit http://www.qvc.com/qic/qvcapp.aspx/app.nav/ params.class.K990/walk.yah.0101-K990.

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Writers and Contributors

Dean G. Campbell

Dorothy Rosby

Mr. Campbell advises clients throughout the country and is licensed in securities and insurances in many states.

Dorothy Rosby is an entertaining speaker and syndicated humor columnist whose work appears regularly in 30-plus newspapers in eleven Western and Midwestern states. She is also Community Relations Director for an organization which supports people with disabilities. She lives in Rapid City, South Dakota with her husband, son, mother, and hamster.

Contact her at drosby@rushmore.com or see her website at www.dorothyrosby.com.

Dean G. Campbell is President of Campbell Retirement Planning Centers, Inc. He graduated Magna Cum Laude from Oakland University in Rochester, Michigan with degrees in Finance and Economics. While attending college, he also taught business applications. Simultaneously he began attaining licenses to transact business in Securities and Insurances.

Upon graduation, he worked for an independent brokerage firm then moved on to IDS Financial Services, now Ameriprise. After becoming a top producer at Ameriprise, Dean worked as a Financial Planner for Empire of America Bank in Buffalo, New York. He later became a Financial Planner for First of America Bank where he also for a period worked as the financial consultant for the bank’s customers at fourteen branches.

Thirteen years ago Dean started Campbell Retirement Planning Centers, Inc. To date he has personally helped over 2,500 people with planning there financial futures. He serves on the Board of Directors of the Eastern Michigan Better Business Bureau and was recently appointed for his fourth term.

Through the business and personally, Dean donates to several charities, helping those who are less fortunate.

Visit his website at http://www.campbellretirement.com.

Securities offered through Sigma Financial Corp.

Member FINRA/SIPC

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Angie Brennan Angie Brennan is a humor writer and illustrator from Maryland. Visit her website at www.angiebrennan.com for cartoons, spoof advice, and more.

Greg Williams Greg Williams, The Master Negotiator, is an internationally sought after speaker/trainer. He provides negotiation expertise to corporate and individual clients that seek to maximize their negotiation efforts, at the negotiation table. You can sign up for Greg’s free negotiation tips at www.TheMasterNegotiator.com – You can also view his Negotiation Tip videos at http:// www.youtube.com/user/ TheMasterNegotiator - Greg’s motto is, “Remember, you’re always negotiating”.

Writers and Contributors

Rosalind Sedacca

Margaret Paul

Recognized as The Voice of Child-Centered Divorce, Rosalind Sedacca is a Certified Corporate Trainer and founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network for parents facing, moving through or transitioning beyond divorce. She is the author of How Do I Tell the Kids about the Divorce? A Create-a-Storybook™ Guide to Preparing Your Children – with Love! which offers a unique approach to breaking divorce news to your children based on her own personal experience. Rosalind is on the Board of Directors of ChildSharing, Inc. and WE Magazine for Women. She writes monthly columns for several divorce and parenting websites. She is also the 2008 National First Place Winner of the Victorious Woman Award. Rosalind shares her expertise through TV, radio and print interviews, newsletters, teleseminars and coaching.

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a noted public speaker, bestselling author, workshop leader, relationship expert, and Inner Bonding® facilitator. She has counseled individuals and couples, and led groups, classes, and workshops since 1968. She is the author and co-author of eight books, including the internationally best-selling Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?, Healing Your Aloneness, Inner Bonding, and Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By God?

As a Certified Corporate Trainer and Business Communication Strategist she provides consulting, speaking, training and Executive Coaching services to organizations nation-wide on marketing, public relations and business communication issues. She specializes in gender-related dynamics, marketing to women and employeemanagement collaboration in the workplace.

In addition, Rosalind is a partner in a new business membership site for women, Women Helping Women Mastermind, where women can network, promote their businesses, access help and advice, find resources for accelerating their careers and enjoy free weekly teleseminars, a free weekly newsletter and much more. Basic Membership is also free to women around the world at www.WomenHelpingWomenMastermind.com.

To learn more about her book, free ezine, programs and other valuable resources on creating a positive ChildCentered Divorce, visit www.childcentereddivorce.com and www.howdoitellthekids.com.

For more information about her customized programs, audio and videotapes, and other services, contact Rosalind at 561-742-3537 or Talk2Roz@bellsouth.net.

She is the co-creator, along with Dr. Erika Chopich, of the Inner Bonding® healing process, recommended by actress Lindsay Wagner and singer Alanis Morissette, and featured on Oprah, and of the unique and popular website www.innerbonding.com. Their transformational selfhealing/conflict resolution software program, SelfQuest®, at www.selfquest.com, is being donated to prisons and schools and sold to the general public.

Sue Urda Sue Urda is an Author, Speaker, Inspirer and Co-Founder of Powerful You! Women’s Network, She was named twice on Inc. Magazines list of the 500 Fastest-Growing Private Companies. Sue’s vision is to contribute to a global consciousness of women helping women succeed in business and in life and to open them to truth of who they are. www.sueurda.com.

Dawn McCoy Dawn McCoy is author of "Leadership Building Blocks: An Insider's Guide to Success" http:// flourishleadership.com/store/ index.html She is also is president and CEO of Flourish Leadership, LLC which provides coaching executives, public servants, and youth leaders. For author and speaker details, visit http:// www.flourishleadership.com.

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