Elegant Impressions August 2012

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Elegant Impressions

Av 5772 August 2012

Volume I, Issue VII

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What’s Inside Entertaining

Lemonade Stand Party 6 Ice Cream Party 8

Food & Dessert

Green Quinoa 10 Quinoa Sushi 12 Apricot BBQ Sauce 14 Smoky BBQ Sauce 14 Avocado Fries with Cilantro Sauce 15 Onion Rings 15 Mango & Honey Smoothie 16 Piña Colada 16 Mixed Berry Smoothie 16 Lime, Ginger & Coconut Smoothie 17 Peanut Butter Banana Smoothie 17 Berry Green Smoothie 17 Ice Cream Cupcake Peanut Butter Cups 18 Red, White, & Blueberry Popsickles 20 Four Rope Challah Braid 22 Road Trip Tips 23 Grilling Tips 24 Beef Buying Guide 28

Features

Perfect No- Sew Tutu 30 DIY Sidewalk Chalk Paint 31 Giant Soap Bubbles 32 Glow Water 33 Summer Entertaining 34 Accepting Our Children’s Challenges 36 Decorating with Wall Decals 38 Treating Strep 40 You Are What You Eat 42 10 Ways to Help Your Body Detox 43 Ask the Professor 44 GPS! Navigation For Your Soul 46

Read the magazine online at ElegantImpressions.com Contact info@elegantimpressions.com 917-830-4262 Editor In Chief Amy Oren Editor Jacob Mograby Contributing Writers Sari Azrak Leah Benguigui Rina Fine Avi Fishoff Jordan Leibniz Renelle Maslaton Estreya Mograby Dr. Jack Sadacka Rabbi Yaakov Shain Creative Design Amy Oren Photography Maggie Mograby Ad Sales Barbra Panigel Steven Sorscher Published By Elegant Impressions Elegant Impressions is a monthly publication. Subscriptions are $29.95 for 6 issues. Call 917-830-4262 for more information. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part in any form without prior written consent from the publisher is prohibited. Elegant Impressions Magazine assumes no responsibility for the content of articles or advertisements in the magazine. Elegant Impressions is not responsible for typographical errors. Readers should always verify kashrut status independently.

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Lemonade Stand

Party!

Nothing beats the heat like a cool, refreshing glass of lemonade, and served up on an adorable lemonade stand, it’s that much sweeter! Celebrate summer with a bright and cheerful lemonade stand party like this one, complete with treats like pink lemonade cupcakes, Rice Krispie treats, lemon cookies

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and lots of refreshing lemonade. Make Your Own Lemonade Stand buckets are the perfect take home party favor for guests. Soft decor like fabric bunting, doily wrapped bottles, and lots of pink and yellow bows make this the ultimate girlie summertime soiree!


Vendor Credits: Design & Styling, Lemonade Buckets Giggles Galore Photography Elayne Dunn Photography Printable Designs Sweet Sosbee Designs Lemon Cookies Sugarlily Cookie Company Lemonade Shirt Modern Frills Paper Straws, Yellow Striped Favor Bags and Gumball Tubes The TomKat Studio 7


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Ice Cream

Party!

Make summertime parties even sweeter with everyone’s favorite treat!

Credited Vendors Event Design & Coordination Grand SoirĂŠes Event Design & Coordination Photography Trista Lerit Photography Cake & Sweets Sweet & Saucy Shop Flowers Jen K Floral Design

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Recipe & Photography Jacquelyn Scoggin Good Things Grow

Green Quinoa •1 cup quinoa •2 cup water or vegetable stock •1 small onion, thinly sliced •1 tablespoon olive oil •¼ teaspoon salt •¼ teaspoon ground cumin

Herb Paste •1/3 cup chopped fresh parsley •1 cup chopped fresh cilantro •2 tablespoons chopped fresh dill •2 tablespoons chopped fresh mint •6 tablespoons olive oil

•½ cup chopped pistachios, toasted and roughly chopped •1 clove garlic, finely chopped •big pinch red pepper flakes •1¼ cup baby arugula leaves or larger ones chopped

Rinse and drain the quinoa. Place in a saucepan with the water or stock, adding a pinch of salt if you like, and bring to a boil. Reduce heat to a low simmer, cover and cook for about 15 minutes. Meanwhile, heat a large pan over medium heat and fry the onions in the oil until golden and completely soft. Add the salt and cumin and mix well. Leave to cool slightly. To make the herb paste, place all the ingredients in a food processor and blitz until smooth. Add the herb paste to the quinoa and mix everything together well with a fork to fluff it up. Add the cooked onion, the pistachios, garlic, red pepper flakes, and arugula and gently mix. Serve at room temperature.

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Quinoa Sushi Recipe & Photography Elizabeth Mochrie Noms for the Poor These are a healthier alternative to traditional sushi that is made with sticky white rice. The beauty of this recipe is its infinite adaptability - you can fill your sushi rolls with just about anything: cucumber, avocado, sweet potato, tofu, mango, mushrooms, zucchini, carrots...whatever your heart desires! • Scant ½ cup Uncooked Quinoa • 2 - 4 tbsp Rice Vinegar • 2 Sheets Toasted Nori

Filling • ½ an Avocado • 4 Shiitake Mushrooms (or other fillings of your choice) Makes approximately 16 pieces. 1 large or 2 small servings. 1. Rinse quinoa well in a strainer, then transfer to a pot and mix with 1 cup of water and a pinch of salt. Bring to a boil over high heat, reduce heat to low and simmer, covered, until the water has been fully absorbed, about fifteen minutes. 2. While quinoa is cooking, prepare your fillings and slice them thinly. Fillings such as cucumbers, carrots, sweet potato and tofu should be cut into about 3-inch strips. If using sweet potato as a filling, slice into thin, fry-size strips and bake at 375° for about 15 minutes, then set aside to cool. 3. Once quinoa is cooked, transfer to a bowl and drizzle with rice vinegar. Using a large flat spoon, work in the vinegar, using a stirring/folding motion, mushing the quinoa together. NOTE: Do not let the quinoa cool completely! Let it sit for about 5 - 10 minutes so that it’s no longer hot (which will melt the nori) but the trick to making the quinoa stick is using it while it’s still warm. 4. Lay a nori sheet on your rolling mat, leaving 5mm of space between the nori and the end of the mat closest to you. Spread about 3/4 - 1 scant cup of the quinoa over the nori (still warm!) using a flat spoon, pressing it as close to the edges as you can. Make sure to leave a clear strip, one centimeter thick, at the end of the nori sheet farthest from you (this is crucial in ensuring the roll will hold together). 5. Place the fillings in the middle of the nori sheet, laying them out evenly and making sure not to pile them too high. 6. Pour a small amount of rice vinegar (or water) into a shallow bowl and, using the tip of your finger, dip it into the vinegar and wet the centimeter of space you left at the edge of the nori (this will make sure the roll stick together). 7. Take hold of the bottom of the sushi mat and quickly fold it over the fillings, then squeeze it together and press down with your hands to seal in the fillings. Then take hold of the edge of the sushi mat and pull it forward to finish rolling the sushi, keeping the mat taut and pressing down on the roll with your other hand. 8. Transfer the roll to a cutting board and using a sharp serrated knife, gently slice into 8 pieces. Serve immediately, with soy sauce for dipping, or store in the fridge for up to three days.

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Apricot BBQ Sauce Recipe & Photography Nick Evans Macheesmo • 1 medium onion, diced • 2 cups apricots, halved • 3 cloves garlic, minced • 2 inches fresh ginger, minced • 1-2 Serrano peppers, minced (seeds in is hotter) • ¼ cup honey • ¼ cup ketchup • ¼ cup tomato paste • 2 tablespoons white wine vinegar • 2 tablespoons olive oil • 2 cups water • ½-1 teaspoon cayenne pepper • Salt and pepper Add oil to a large pot over medium heat. Once hot, add onions, garlic, Serrano, and ginger. Season with a pinch of salt and cook for a few minutes until onion turns translucent. Add in apricots, cayenne

Smoky BBQ Sauce Recipe & Photography Erica Berge Cooking for Seven • 1 (6 0z.) can tomato paste • 1 cup maple syrup • ¼ cup + 2 tbsp white wine vinegar • 1 ½ tbsp onion powder • ½ teaspoon garlic powder • 3/4 teaspoon sea salt • 1 teaspoon chili powder • 2 tbsp liquid smoke Whisk all ingredients together in a medium bowl. Store in the refrigerator.

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pepper and black pepper. Cook for another minute until fruit starts to soften. Stir in other ingredients and add water last. Stir well to make sure tomato paste is distributed evenly. Bring to a simmer and simmer for 10-15 minutes. Let cool slightly and then blend until mostly smooth, some chunks are fine. Return to pot and bring back to a simmer. Let simmer for another 4550 minutes until the mixture is nice and thick. Use immediately or store in the fridge for up to a week.


Avocado Fries & Cilantro Lemon Dipping Sauce Recipe & Photography Eva Kosmas Adventures in Cooking • Oil for frying • 2 avocados • 2 eggs, beaten • 1 and 1/3 Cup bread crumbs • 1 teaspoon lemon pepper • ½ teaspoon salt • ¼ teaspoon cumin

Cilantro Lemon Dipping Sauce • 5 tablespoons mayonnaise • 3 tablespoons fresh cilantro, chopped • Juice from ½ of lemon In a medium-sized bowl, mix together the bread crumbs, lemon pepper, salt and cumin. Set aside. Cut the avocados in half and then slice them vertically into 4” x 1” wedges. Set them aside. Heat the vegetable oil to 335 ° in a large frying pan, add enough oil so that the oil is about 3 to four inches deep. Dredge the avocado slices in the breadcrumb mixture, then in the egg mixture, then in the breadcrumb mixture again. Place them in the hot oil and fry them for about 2-3 minutes, or until golden brown. Remove them with a slotted spoon or tongs, and set them on a plate lined with paper towels to absorb the excess oil. Allow them to dry for 10 minutes, then transfer them to a serving tray and serve them immediately with the Cilantro Lemon Dipping Sauce. To make the Cilantro Lemon Dipping Sauce, place the mayonnaise, cilantro, and lemon juice in a blender and mix until smooth and creamy in texture.

Onion Rings • ½ cup all-purpose flour • ¼ cup cornstarch • 2 tablespoons instant mashed potatoes • big pinch of cayenne • 1 cup cold club soda • 2-3 cups Panko (Japanese-style breadcrumbs) • fine salt to taste • vegetable oil for frying • 2-3 yellow onions, cut into 1/4-inch rings

Recipe Food Wishes

Food Prep & Photography Catherine Hubbard/Lipstick Blogger

Heat your oil to 350° over medium high heat. Mix flour, corn starch, potatoes, and cayenne together in a medium bowl. Add the club soda and let sit for about ten minutes. Meanwhile pour the breadcrumbs in a shallow place and cut the onions into ¼ inch rings. Dip the onions in the wet batter and then coat them in breadcrumbs. Repeat until all onions are coated. Dip onions in batches into the hot oil. Fry for approximately 60-90 seconds per side. Be careful not to overcrowd the oil as this will make the rings less crispy.

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Piña Colada Recipe & Photography Amy Lea The Blond Cook

Mango & Honey Recipe & Photography Dori Grasska Malibu Kitchen 1 cup fresh mango, peeled & cubed ½ banana, peeled and sliced 1 heaping tablespoon honey ¾ cup plain yogurt 1 cup ice

Mixed Berry

Recipe & Photography Susanah Baker / That Organic Girl

1 Cup Frozen Organic Raspberries 1 Cup Organic Pomegranate Juice 1 Cup Organic Spinach ½ Organic Banana 15 Organic Grapes 15 Organic Blackberries 5 Organic Strawberries ¼ Organic Lemon (about two slices peeled) About 7 Ice cubes

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½ cup cream of coconut ½ cup pineapple orange juice ½ cup light rum 3 cups ice Optional: cherries for garnish


Lime, Ginger and Coconut Recipe & Photography Sonia! The Healthy Foodie ½ ripe avocado, diced ½ tbsp fresh ginger, chopped (no need to peel it) Juice and zest of 1 lime ¼ cup fat free Greek yogurt ¼ cup pasteurized egg whites (optional) 1 cup coconut milk or coconut water 3-4 tbsp vanilla flavored whey protein 1 tbsp flax seed meal 1-2 tbsp unsweetened shredded coconut 1 tsp date paste ½ tsp pure vanilla extract

Peanut Butter Banana The Slow Roasted Italian Recipe by Donna Elick Photo by Chad Elick 5 frozen bananas, cut into chunks ½ cup smooth peanut butter 1 cup 2% milk

Berry Green Recipe & Photography Lindsay Ostrom Pinch of Yum 3 small bananas ½ cup milk 1-2 handfuls of spinach 1 cup frozen berries (blueberries, blackberries, etc.) ½ cup bran cereal such as All Bran original 1-2 tablespoons sweetener (sugar, honey, Truvia etc.) ice cubes (optional)

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Ice Cream Cupcake Peanut Butter Cups Recipe & Photography Alexandra Azary Bright Eyed Baker

Chocolate Cups • Generous 2 cups good quality chocolate chips or chopped chocolate, divided* Chocolate Top Coat • 1 cup good quality chocolate chips or chopped chocolate Chocolate Cupcakes • 3/8 cup unsweetened good quality cocoa powder • 3/8 cup all-purpose flour • 1/4 teaspoon baking powder • 1/8 teaspoon salt • 1/4 cup butter, softened (1/2 a stick) • 1/2 cup granulated sugar • 1 egg plus 1 egg yolk • 1/2 teaspoon vanilla • 1/4 cup yogurt • Peanut Butter Ice Cream

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Make the Chocolate Cups: 1. Line 12 cups in a standard size muffin tin with paper liners. It’s helpful to place a drop of honey in the bottom of each muffin cup and press the paper liners in on top so that they stick. This way, they won’t move around quite as much when you’re coating them with chocolate. Be sure to use muffin liners that fit your tin well and don’t scrunch up inside. 2. Melt a generous cup of chocolate chips or chopped chocolate in a double boiler over medium heat. As soon as the chocolate begins to melt, stir continuously until smooth. 3. Use a pastry brush to brush the melted chocolate over the insides of the muffin liners, starting at the bottom of each one and moving outward and up against the sides. Make sure you cover all of the liners’ grooves, checking from every angle including the top view. If you find any small spots that your brush can’t fill, use a toothpick. Use all of the melted chocolate, making a thick first coat for each cup. Return the chocolate to the double boiler if needed during this process to re-melt/ reheat. Alternatively, keep the chocolate over the double boiler, removed from the stove, so it stays warm while you work. If the chocolate gets too cool, it will become gloppy and hard to use. 4. Place the chocolate cups in the freezer for about 30 minutes, until firm. 5. Once the first coating for the chocolate cups has set, melt another cup of chocolate chips or chopped chocolate in the double boiler. Coat the chocolate cups with a second layer of melted chocolate, being sure to cover the first coat entirely. Again, you can use a toothpick to fill in any small missed spots that the pastry brush can’t get to. Return the chocolate cups to the freezer for about an hour, until solid. Meanwhile, make the chocolate cupcakes. 6. While the cupcakes are cooling, remove the chocolate cups from the freezer and gently lift them out of the muffin tin. If the edges are stuck to the tin, run a toothpick along the outsides to loosen the cups. Once you can spin them around in the tin, you should be able to get them out. Carefully peel the muffin liners off of the cups. Be patient with this step, and if you get to a problem spot, start again at a different location. If the cups get too soft and feel like they’re giving in to the pressure of your hands, place them back into the freezer for a bit and then continue. 7. Place the chocolate cups in an airtight container and return to the freezer until ready to assemble the peanut butter cups. Make the Chocolate Cupcakes 1. Preheat oven to 350° and grease (not line) 6 cups in a standard size muffin tin. 2. Sift together the cocoa powder, all-purpose flour, baking powder, and salt in a bowl. Whisk lightly if needed to evenly combine. 3. In the bowl of a stand mixer, cream together butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add the egg and egg yolk one at a time, beating after each addition. Beat in vanilla. 4. Add 1/2 of the dry ingredients to the wet, mixing in at lowest speed until somewhat incorporated but still streaked throughout the batter. Add the yogurt in the same way, until partially incorporated. Add the remaining dry ingredient mixture and mix until all ingredients are just combined with no streaks. 5. Scoop the batter into the prepared muffin cups, gently leveling out the tops. Bake in the preheated oven for 20 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into the center of a cupcakes comes out clean. 6. Allow the cupcakes to cool for 5 minutes, and then place on a wire rack to cool completely. Cover with plastic wrap until ready to use. While the cupcakes are cooling, remove the paper liners from the chocolate cups. 7. Once the cupcakes have cooled and while the ice cream is churning, slice the cupcakes into 3 sections. The ideas is to make two halves that will go into two separate peanut butter cups, with a thin middle section that can be set aside. Starting from the bottom of the cupcake, move the knife up to the height of half of a chocolate cup and make one slice here. Make the second slice at the bottom of the cupcake’s dome. Grasp the dome as you make this second slice in order to get a clean cut. You should be able to fit each cupcake half narrow side (or dome side) down into a chocolate cup so that the top will line up with top of the chocolate cup once you fill the bottom half with ice cream. Assemble the Peanut Butter Cups: 1. Scoop ice cream into each peanut butter cup to fill halfway. Place a cupcake half on top, dome side or narrow side down. Put a bit of pressure on top to sink the cupcake in so the top is level with the top of the chocolate cup. If you added to much ice cream and it is coming up around the cupcake, you may need to remove some and try again. Place assembled peanut butter cups in an airtight container and freeze immediately, until the ice cream is solid. I recommend letting them freeze overnight. 2. Melt chocolate for topping peanut butter cups in a double boiler as previously instructed over medium heat. Working with one cup at a time, spoon some melted chocolate onto the top. Use a spatula to push the chocolate gently toward the edges of the cup until all openings are completely sealed with chocolate. Use an icing spatula to lightly smooth the melted chocolate. Again, don’t let the melted chocolate get cool and gloppy during this process. Place finished peanut butter cups in the freezer until ready to serve. 3. Enjoy immediately upon serving. . Yields 12 Peanut Butter Cups

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Red, White and Blueberry Popsicles Recipe & Photography Bonnie Marcum Simply This and That Makes six 4 oz. popsicles • 1 3/4 cup blueberries • 1 cup strawberries, stems removed • 1 cup plain yogurt • 1/4 cup (or more) honey Rinse the blueberries and strawberries, then thoroughly puree each fruit separately. Stir 2 tablespoons of honey into the blueberries and 1 tablespoon into the strawberries. Spoon 1 cup yogurt into a bowl and add 1 tablespoon honey. To make popsicles, spoon blueberry mixture into the bottom of your molds. Then add a layer of yogurt. Add a layer of strawberries. Freeze for several hours or overnight.

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Four Rope Challah Braid

By Estreya Mograby Photography Maggie Mograby Step 1: Roll out four long ropes of dough. Step 2: Take Rope 1 on the right and move it towards the left side weaving over Rope 2, under Rope 3 and over Rope 4. Step 3: Now the rope all the way to the right is Rope 1, so repeat the same weaving pattern using this rope. Repeat this step until you weave the entire length of your ropes, always starting from Rope 1 on the right and moving towards the left. Step 4: Tuck the ends under the challah and pinch them in place. Note: This weave can be done with more than four ropes. Try a six braider!

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To order delicious and beautiful challot for Shabbat or special occasions, call Estreya 917-838-5109. Many styles and shapes available!

Alternate Step 1: Roll out two long ropes of dough. Place one perpendicularly above the other. Fold over one edge from the bottom, so that you now have four ropes attached.


Are We There Yet?

Road Trip Tips By Leah Benguigui Summer is here! As the temperature rises, the lure of the open road beckons. Wherever your destination, it’s wise to take a few essentials along to make the trip safer and more enjoyable. Below are some must-haves for your next family road trip. Maps Driving directions are a must. With a little planning ahead by charting your course on a map, or with a push of a button on a GPS, you will have what it takes to get you where you want to be! Many cars and even cell phones have navigation systems built in, but if you don’t have one, you can pick one up for around $100. Even if you have a GPS, it’s a good idea to have your directions in writing, just in case! Know Before You Go A spot check of the following is important to ensure a safe and enjoyable ride. Before you pull out, make sure to fill your gas tank. Check oil, tire pressure, and windshield fluid. Make sure that your car registration and car insurance are up to date and in the car. Recharge your cell phone and Bluetooth headset, and take along a car cell phone charger. Prepare a Play List Don’t forget to take your favorite tunes along for the ride. Rev up the excitement for your kids by allowing them to choose which CD’s they would like to bring along. Also, while driving (if you can handle it), have everyone sing along with the music to make the time pass quickly and keep everyone in a good mood. Snacks and Food Pack plenty of healthy snacks for the trip such as fruit, pretzels, granola bars, crackers, nuts, cut up vegetables, along with a few fun treats. A great idea is to pre-portion them in individual Ziploc snack size bags. You could also pack sandwiches to enjoy a picnic lunch at a roadside park. If you will be away for a few days, make sure to plan a menu and pack accordingly. A cooler with water bottles and a few soft drinks (caffeinated to keep you awake while driving late at night) will come in handy throughout your trip. Simply refill with ice at your hotel or destination and you’re good for the return trip. Health & Safety Make sure your car is stocked with easy-to-reach items such as tissues, paper towels, baby wipes, and hand sanitizer. Take along any prescription medications you need as well as basics such as adult and children’s pain

reliever, and motion sickness remedies. A first aid kit is also essential, equipped with band aids, antibiotic cream, and insect repellant. Sunglasses for the driver are a must. Don’t forget to apply and reapply sunscreen during your trip to prevent sunburn. Keep it Comfy & Clean Whether you’ll be driving for a few hours or even into the night, be sure to wear comfortable clothes and shoes. Experienced travelers will tell you that a road trip is not the time to wear anything that restricts or binds. Also make sure to get out of the car and walk around a bit to stretch your legs at each rest stop. A light blanket and small pillow will also help to keep it comfy for those who would like to curl up and take a nap during the drive. Keep a drawstring garbage bag handy and hang it over the back of the front seat. Periodic five minute clean ups at each rest stop will help conquer clutter and keep the car environment clean and comfortable. Smile! Whether you’re headed to the beach or to the mountains, you’ll make lots of memories and see things you may not come across every day. Be sure to have your digital camera charged (and a spare battery) for all those impromptu photo moments! For longer trips, don’t forget to pack your camera charger. Good Company Take turns driving with other adults to make the drive easier. If you’re traveling with small children, be prepared with a few fun road games, DVD’s and even crayons and coloring books to help the miles speed by. Most of all, remember to have fun and turn your trip into a memorable adventure! Bon Voyage! __________________________________________________ After more than a decade in education, Leah Benguigui has chosen to further develop her creativity in her jewelry business, Gems by Leah Benguigui. She can be reached for appointments at 718-339-5659.

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Fire Up the Grill Marinating Soaking various cuts of meat in a marinade is a good method for adding flavor as well as Follow these helping to tenderize the meat. tips to have the A proper marinade should perfect BBQ contain an acidic ingredient such every time. as vinegar or wine, oil such as olive oil, and seasonings such as herbs and spices. Citrus fruit juices may be used in place of the vinegar or wine to provide the acidic ingredient that is necessary to soften the tissues of the meat.

use as a basting liquid or as part of a sauce for the meat. • After you marinate your steaks, pat them dry on both sides. Wet steaks don’t sear; they steam.

There are several important points to remember when using a marinade:

• Application: A rub mixture can be rubbed onto the meat, but the moisture from the meat can cause the dry ingredients to stick to your hands. The best results often occur when the ingredients are sprinkled evenly on all sides. • Ingredients: Some of the ingredients that may be used for a dry rub include black pepper, cumin, chili powder, crushed red pepper, celery seed, garlic powder or fresh crushed or minced garlic, salt, and brown sugar. • Paste Rub: A small amount of liquid may be added to the mixture in order to create a dry paste, which may be preferred in some cases. Some of the liquids that are often used are vinegar, cider vinegar, wine, or fruit juice. • Sugar Usage: Use sugar sparingly because it will melt and burn during the cooking process, especially if the beef is grilled or broiled. Too much of the burnt sugar will provide unpleasant results. Only a small amount of sugar is necessary to provide adequate flavor. If you’re using brown sugar in a rub, make sure it’s moist so that it mixes easily with the other spices in the rub. If the sugar is old, it will not mix well and will have the texture of hard pebbles, which will ruin the rub.

• The marinade should totally cover the meat in order for it to work effectively. • When using tender cuts of beef, a soaking time of 2 hours or less is all that is required because the marinade is used basically to flavor the meat. Tougher cuts of beef should be soaked in the marinade for at least several hours or overnight in order to tenderize the meat as well as flavor it. • Always marinate meat in the refrigerator. •Since the marinade contains an acidic ingredient, reactive containers such as metal bowls should not be used. It is best to use containers such as glass or plastic bowls or plastic bags that can be sealed. •Marinades containing tomato or sugar should be used towards the end of grilling or broiling, since they tend to burn food. • When meat has been marinated for a long period of time it will shorten the cooking time. Twelve hours of marinating will reduce the cooking time by 30 to 35%. • The marinade should not be reused for any other purpose because of the bacteria that may be present from having been in contact with the raw meat. The only way the marinade can be reused is to boil it thoroughly for

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Rubs

An additional option for tenderizing beef, as well as adding flavor, is with the use of a rub. A dry mix of herbs and spices are applied to the raw beef and are allowed to permeate and flavor the meat over a period of time, usually overnight in the refrigerator. An endless variety of rubs can be prepared for beef depending on the types of flavors that you want to add to the meat.

Sauces

Brush on BBQ sauces or other sauces during the last 3-5 minutes of cooking to prevent the sugar from burning.


Preparing a Charcoal Grill

When determining the proper amount of charcoal to use, first decide on how much of the area of the grate that will be required for cooking. An even layer of charcoal briquettes should be spread across the entire bottom of the grilling unit if the entire surface of the cooking grate will be used. When only a portion of the grate will be used for cooking, the coals should extend about two inches beyond the area of the grate where the food will be grilled. If you want part of the grill to be hotter, simply pile the charcoal a little higher on that side. Charcoal briquets are ready for cooking when they’re glowing red and their surface is covered with gray ash. Coals will take anywhere from 20 to 40 minutes to reach this stage. When coals are ready, use tongs to spread them out for even heat. The addition of aromatic wood is a popular practice. Hardwoods, such as apple, hickory, and oak, provide a pronounced smoked flavor to food. Small logs, woodchips, or wood chunks are most often used. It is usually recommended that woodchips and chunks be soaked in water prior to use. A convenient method for estimating the heat level emitted by the charcoal fire is to place the palm of your hand three or four inches above the grilling grate. The length of time that you can leave your hand above the grate before having to remove it (because of the discomfort from the heat) determines the heat intensity.

Length of Time 10 seconds 8 seconds 6 seconds 4 seconds 2 seconds

Level of Heat Intensity Approx. Grill Temp. Low Heat 225° - 250° Medium-low Heat 250° - 325° Medium Heat 325° - 375° Medium-high Heat 375° - 450° High Heat 450° - 650°

Oil grates with no-stick spray (or brush oil on grates) before starting grill to prevent food from sticking.

Direct vs. Indirect Heat

Grilling with direct heat is accomplished by placing food on the grilling grate in the area directly over the heat source. Direct heat grilling is the best method for foods such as hot dogs, steaks, hamburgers, and fish. Foods that are thin, such as thin cuts of meat, are the best choices for grilling with direct heat because the food is grilled quickly and evenly when using such high temperatures. Thicker foods may burn on the exterior before the interior portions are fully cooked; therefore, direct heat grilling is not a good choice for such foods. When grilling thin foods over direct heat, the result is best when the food is turned only once to cook both sides. You develop the richest flavors in steaks when you leave them alone as much as possible.

source that is not directly under the food. This allows thick food items to be cooked slowly, which is necessary to ensure that the food does not burn on the exterior surface before the interior portion reaches the proper doneness. Foods such as beef roasts, whole turkeys, and whole chickens are good choices for grilling with indirect heat. Indirect heat grilling is often used in conjunction with direct heat grilling. Large meat cuts, for example, may be seared directly over high heat, which helps to seal in the juices, thereby maintaining tenderness. The meat is then placed in an area of the grilling grate that is away from the heat source in order for the indirect heat to cook the meat slowly until it has reached the proper doneness. When using a charcoal grill, push the hot coals (with long handled metal tongs or fireplace implement) to the edges of the grill, creating a ring of coals. In the center of the charcoal ring, place a pan. The purpose of the pan is to catch drippings from the food, which could otherwise cause flare-ups if allowed to drip on the grill unit. A disposable aluminum pan is a good choice for this purpose. When the meat is adequately seared, place it on the grate on top of the drip pan, away from the hot coals. It is important to close the lid on the grill during the grilling process to maintain an even temperature and ensure proper doneness of the food. The meat can be checked periodically to ensure that it does not become overcooked. When using a gas grill, first preheat the grill, then turn off all but one of the burners, keeping it at its highest setting. Place a drip pan under the location where the meat will be cooked, away from the direct heat of the front gas burner. Position the seared meat on the area of the grilling grate over the drip pan, away from the direct heat of the front burner. It is important to close the hood of the grill to hold in the heat. One burner set on high is sufficient to produce enough heat for proper indirect heat grilling if the hood is closed. Generally, if the food takes less than 20 minutes to cook, use direct heat; if it takes longer, use indirect heat. Resist the temptation to lift the lid and turn the steaks over and over. Opening the lid can add from 10-15 minutes onto grilling time. Do not use a fork to turn the meat as you are grilling since the piercing causes the juices to escape. A long-handled spatula or tong is more appropriate. After the meat is taken off the grill, giving it time to rest is the key to juicy, perfectly cooked meat. The resting process allows the juices to redistribute themselves throughout the meat. Let your meat rest uncovered, because the covering causes the food to steam and can make the golden brown crust or skin soggy.

Foods grilled with indirect heat are cooked with a heat

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Grilling Chicken

No matter what seasoning you use, try to get as much of it as you can onto the chicken under the skin. Applying all the seasoning to the skin will limit the penetration of the seasoning. When cooking chicken pieces you want to first put them on the grill skin side down. If cooking a whole chicken put the breast side down and cook for about 20 minutes then turn the chicken breast side up for approximately another 20 minutes. Grill until the skin is golden brown. Do one cut to check for doneness. The juices will run clear. Note that cooking times vary. Grill variations, thickness of meat, bone-in or boneless, skin or no skin, all effect the cooking times of chicken. Use a meat thermometer, look for golden brown skin, clear running juices, and monitor closely to cook to the best doneness. Boneless chicken pieces do well grilled quickly over direct heat, but bone-in pieces take longer and direct heat alone would burn them. Use indirect heat for bone-in pieces. When grilling chicken kabobs, the chicken pieces will stay juicier longer if they are touching one another (but not crammed) on the skewers. When the chicken is almost done, you can add bbq sauce to it. The secret of a good coating is to let the sauce cook onto the chicken. Apply to one side of the chicken, close the lid, and grill for about 3-5 minutes. Open the grill, apply to the other side and repeat. Continue this 3 or 4 times to get a really good sticky coat. Lower the heat of the grill by turning the knobs down on a gas grill or close the vents on your charcoal grill. Coat the chicken multiple times and let the sauce cook onto the chicken. Don’t serve the chicken right away. Let the chicken “rest”. For grilling a whole chicken let it set for about 15 minutes after taking it off the grill and before carving. For chicken pieces let them sit for about 5 minutes to let the juices run back into the meat. You will surely have juicier chicken doing this.

Grilling Fish

Fish filet and whole fish require a grilling time of 5 minutes on each side, per thickness inch. I.e.: 2 inch thick = 10 minutes on each side. Measure filet at thickest point. For larger filets, make a small slash in the thickest part of the fish to ensure even doneness. If grilling directly on grate, sear with direct heat then continue with indirect (or raise grate to at least 6 inches above fire). Rub with oil before grilling to seal in moisture.

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Fish is cooked when the meat flakes easily with a fork and appears opaque all the way through. If any of the meat is still glossy and translucent then it is not done. Fish has a tendency to dry out and break into small pieces. Keep some fresh lemon juice handy while you are grilling. You can brush this on while you grill to add flavor and keep the fish moist. Wrapping fish in tinfoil also keeps fish moist and prevents sticking. Spray inside of aluminum foil with no-stick spray to prevent sticking. A grill basket or perforated grill pan makes grilling fish, especially smaller pieces, considerably easier for cooking and clean-up. Be sure to spray or brush the basket with oil to prevent sticking.

Grilling Fruits

Almost any fruit can be cooked on the grill. Hard fruits such as apples, pineapples and pears are easier to grill than softer fruits such as peaches, nectarines, and plums. Softer fruits require more attention when being grilled to prevent overcooking, which will cause the fruit to become mushy. Softer fruit only need to be heated, not cooked. Caution: Many fruits contain a high level of water. This water content will make the fruit extremely hot when grilling. If you do not allow the fruit to cool slightly after removing it from the grill, the fruit may cause serious burns to the mouth. • Fruits are best grilled when the coals have begun to die out or when placed on the outer edges of the grate, using more of an indirect type of heat. • If placing fruit directly on the grill rack, cut the fruit into pieces that are large enough so they do not fall through the grates. • Fruits can be grilled with skins on. Softer fruits benefit from leaving their skins on in that it helps maintain their shape and holds them together as they are being grilled. • Brushing fruit with oil or melted shortening during grilling will help to keep the fruit from sticking to the grill grate. Spraying a non-stick cooking spray on the grate before heating grill also keeps foods from sticking. • Use skewers or a grill basket to prevent small chunks of fruit and soft fruit from falling through the grate. If you choose to use skewers, 2 skewers will help prevent fruits from spinning while the cook is turning them on the grill. Remember to soak bamboo skewers for 30 minutes or more before using to prevent them from burning on the grill. • To enhance the flavor of the fruit, try brushing cut fruits with melted margarine and sprinkling with sugar, cinnamon, brown sugar, or lemon juice while grilling. Sugar tends to burn so it is best to apply it toward the end of cooking time. • Crack open a fresh coconut for an unexpected great grill taste. Slice the coconut into wedges and lay the pieces white side down on the grill over low coals. Grill until lightly browned. Dip the grilled coconut in melted chocolate and enjoy!


Grilling Vegetables

The flavor of the vegetable intensifies when it has been grilled. Because a lot of the moisture evaporates from the vegetables as they are grilled, the flavor becomes more concentrated and the sugars become more condensed, which increases the sweetness and flavor of the vegetables. The fire brings out an appealingly sweet, smoky flavor that most people can’t believe exists in a vegetable. • Vegetables should be grilled over a medium heat. The length of cooking time will vary depending on the type of vegetable and how it has been prepared. Vegetables should have browned grill marks and be tender when pierced with a fork or the tip of a knife. • Because vegetables lack fat, they need oil, liquid, or some sort of marinade to prevent them from burning and sticking and to keep them moist. Brush vegetables with oil (preferably vegetable oil because it has a high smoke point) or a flavored oil mixture, such as a salad dressing or your own mixture of oil and herbs or other seasonings. Or marinate vegetables in a dressing or marinade of your choice for at least 30 minutes before grilling. • Prevent vegetables from drying out on the grill by soaking them in cold water before cooking. • Cut vegetables into uniform size pieces so they will cook evenly. The larger and thicker the pieces the longer the grilling time. • Use skewers or a grill basket to prevent small chunks of vegetables from falling through the grate. If you choose to use skewers, 2 skewers will help prevent vegetables from spinning while turning on the grill. Remember to soak bamboo skewers for 30 or more minutes before using to prevent them from burning. • Before placing on the grill, brush oil onto vegetables to prevent them from sticking to the grates. The vegetables must be dry before applying oil or the oil will not stick. • When grilling harder vegetables, such as potatoes, with other vegetables, they may need to be cooked before grilling to ensure that all the vegetables are done at the same time. • Seasoning the vegetables with a coarse salt, such as sea salt or kosher salt, before grilling will draw out extra moisture from the vegetables, which will intensify its sweetness and flavor. • Experiment by sprinkling different herbs and spices over vegetables while grilling. • Keep the lid up for veggies. Covering the bbq traps moist heat and smoke, which makes vegetables lose their crunch. Keep the lid down only for large, whole vegetables that benefit from a little steam, such as winter squashes or potatoes.

Cleanup & Safety

Bacteria eats every kind of food. It grows at any temperature above freezing and stays alive until that temperature hits around 165° F. Every second you give it between these two temperatures it is multiplying and causing disease in your food, so until you’re ready to throw it on the grill, keep it cool in the fridge. You are more likely to get food poisoning than you are to get the flu. The easiest way to clean a soiled grill is to scrub it with a stiff, wire brush while it’s still warm. Cleanup is easier if the grill rack is coated with vegetable oil or nonstick cooking spray before grilling. However, do not spray the grill over the fire, as this could cause a flare-up. Oil dripping from your meat onto the charcoal can cause flare-ups. Grease that collects in your grill builds up over time. It is easy to get several pounds of grease in the bottom of your grill after only a few cookouts. This is why you need to keep your grill clean. A clean grill is a safer grill whether it is gas or charcoal. Do not use water to quench flare-ups on a gas grill -- simply close the hood and turn down the heat until the flames subside. When lighting a gas grill use the 10 to 5 rule. If the grill does not start within 10 seconds, turn off the gas, leave the lid open and give it 5 minutes before you try again. Propane gas can develop into a large cloud quickly. Frequently check gas lines for leaks. Brushing soapy water over the hoses and connectors will show you any potential leaks. Make sure you go over every part of the gas line from the tank to the burner. If you find a leak you need to replace that part before you grill again.

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Beef Buying Guide By Sari Azrak Have you ever had a piece of meat so dry or chewy that you could barely swallow it? Choosing something new in the butcher shop can be intimidating when you’re not sure how to cook an unfamiliar piece of meat, and you don’t want to risk your time and money for a gastronomic failure. Getting a basic understanding of the structure of a cow will help you understand why each piece of meat needs to be treated differently. The tenderness or toughness of a cut of meat depends on how much muscle and fat it contains. For example, cuts from the front of the cow, like the chuck, are heavily muscled and therefore need a long slow cooking. But that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Collagen, or connective tissue, makes the meat tough, but if you cook it long and slow, magic happens. The collagen breaks down into gelatin- which softens and flavors the meat for a delicious meal.

Cuts from the chuck part of the animal include chuck or chuckeye roast, French roast, brick roast and shortribs. The chuck roasts should be cooked in liquid, either in a pot or the oven, while the short ribs are very versatile and can be cooked dry or with liquid. The shoulder of the cow contains the silver tip roast, London Broil, minute roast, kalecal, shoulder and sandwich steaks. The roasts can be cooked in the oven dry, the London broil and the steaks should be grilled or broiled. Briskets are often used for corned beef, but are also cooked as roasts. They do best cooked in the oven with liquid. Cuts from the center of the animal, like the ribs, have little muscle and more fat, and therefore are usually the most tender. These cuts are most often used for steaks and roasts- most featuring the name “rib” like ribeye steak and standing rib roast. They cook best with dry heat, for roasting in the oven or on the grill. What about the back half of the cow? Due to the difficulties in removing the parts that are not kosher (chelev), these parts are off limits to the kosher consumer. You may see an assortment of other items, like pepper steak, shish kebab, or beef stew, but these cuts have been specially chosen because they are best suited for those particular dishes, so there’s no guesswork involved. Not sure what a particular cut of beef is for? Ask your butcher- he can probably tell you the best way to prepare it. A good cut of meat will have specks of white fat evenly distributed throughout the meat. All meat, but especially meat with less fat will benefit from marinades or dry spice rubs, allowing to sit for 6 hours or as long as overnight. Its okay to use high heat on a roast in order to get some browning, but then turn it down to a lower heat to avoid shrinking and drying out the meat. Watch it carefully, and remove from oven when it’s fork-tender. Well-marbled steaks should be cooked quickly with high heat, but leaner steaks should first be marinated, cooked at medium heat, with care taken to avoid overcooking. Always carve against the meat grain for the best texture. Allow cooked roasts to stand for 15-20 minutes before slicing to allow the juices to spread through the roast. For very soft roasts, refrigerate before slicing so they don’t fall apart. Very tender roasts should be sliced ½ an inch thick, while chewier roasts should be sliced no more than ¼ inch thick. A bit of education in the various cuts of kosher beef will enhance the purchase and enjoyment of meat, so next time you’re at the butcher you may just decide to try something new and exciting. Thank you, Jerusalem Glatt, for your assistance with this guide and verifying its accuracy.

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Perfect No-Sew Tutu Tutorial Margalit Romano / Swirly Curls Art Model Suzette Romano Photography Maggie Mograby Materials: 6 yards tulle fabric 1 yard elastic Fabric scissors Ruler (optional) What to do: 1. Knot the ends of the elastic into a waistband size that will fit your little princess. 2. Make sure knot is tied tight and cut excess elastic off. 3. Cut tulle into approximately 2 inch strips. 4. Fold strip of tulle until it is desired length. 5. Create a loop with folded tulle. Pull remaining strip of tulle through the loop, around the elastic. (see picture) 6. Repeat step 5 until entire waistband is covered. *Add ribbons or tulle in different colors for a different look. Margalit of Swirly Curls Art, uses nontraditional techniques and materials. She teaches art classes for kids, and writes a blog dedicated to DIY. 917-207-7649 swirlycurls.blogspot.com

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DIY Sidewalk Chalk Paint

What you need (per color): 1/4 Cup Cornstarch 1/4 Cup Water A few drops of food coloring

Tutorial & Photography Kyra Sosna RACKS and Mooby

What to do: In a plastic cup, pour in 1/4 cup cornstarch. Next, add 1/4 cup water. Stir well. Be sure to get all those globs out! Add a few drops of food coloring and stir well again. Repeat in a new cup for each color desired. Transfer your paints to a muffin tin so there’s less chance of a cup tipping over. Paint! If you do this activity on a warm day, the water will evaporate quickly and you’ll get a chalk-like effect. Note: The cornstarch will settle a bit as time passes so just be sure to stir up the paint before you use it each time.

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r a l u c a t Spec s e l b b u B t n a i G Giant Bubble Solution 12 cups distilled water 5 cups clear dishwashing Soap (Joy or Dawn) 1/2 cup glycerin (found in craft stores) 1. Pour the water into a clean container. 2. Pour the dishwashing soap into the water. Mix it very gently, try not to create a foam. 3. Pour the glycerin in. Mix gently again. (You may need to tweak your solution with more or less glycerin.) Tips for BIG BUBBLES: • If using large bubble wands, pour solution into a cake pan or small swimming pool for easy dipping • Stirring causes bubble solution to foam; foaming inhibits bubble formation. If foam develops, scrape off with a stiff card. • Letting the solution rest for several hours will make the bubbles more durable. • Bubbles work best on humid days. • Keep solution free from dirt, grass, bugs, etc… Make a Giant Bubble Wand: 2 wooden dowels 2 eye screws 4 washers Cotton String Drill a hole in the end of the dowel. Screw the eye hook into the drilled hole until it is secure. Cut a 100” piece of cotton string and another piece of string that is 70” (You can make the string as long or short as you like as long as one string is longer than the other) String the four washers onto the 100” string. Put the ends of both pieces of string through one of the eye hooks and tie a knot. Do the same thing on the other eye

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hook. Now you should have a long string and a shorter one that runs from one dowel to the other. How to Make Giant Bubbles: Submerge the strings of your wand into the bucket of solution. Bring the ends of the dowels up from the bubble solution, together until about chest high. Then separate the dowels by pulling them outward so the string makes a triangle — pointing down. The washers will weigh the center of the bottom string down. Step backward quickly so that the air goes through the bubble solution between the dowels and makes a bubble. Other things to try are funnels, cookie cutters, and straws. Experiment! Bubble Cage: Place a hula hoop in the bottom of a swimming pool of solution. Ask for one or two brave volunteers to take off their shoes and step into the swimming pool and into the center of the hula hoop. Now, very slowly, and with a steady hand, pull the hula hoop straight out of the pool and to the top of your volunteer(s) head. Before they can say, “No way!”, your volunteer is trapped inside a humansized bubble!


Glow Water Tutorial & Photography Play at Home Mom

After all our light play activities, we thought we would take you to a whole new place..... the dark. Materials: Water Yellow highlighter (other colors will work but will not give off the glow like yellow does) Black light (you can find this on Amazon for $14) Break open the yellow highlighter (big ones are easiest to pop open) and remove cylinder ink pad. Soak the ink pad in water for about an hour or until it loses its color. To break them open, just squeeze the end with a pair of scissors and the back will pop off. If you have a hard time getting them open just soak the whole highlighter in water, tip down. It will take a little while longer but will work just as well. You can dilute this quite a bit and it will still glow. We filled a decent size tub half way up with water only using one little yellow highlighter. Shine your black light where you will be using your glow water and watch the magic happen. 33


Create a fragrant and colorful centerpiece with fresh lime slices and blooming perennials. The trick to keeping the lime slices upright is to use two vases of varying sizes, fitting one inside of the other and filling in the space with 1/4� thick lime slices.

Turn your melon into a cocktail keg to serve watermelon cocktails. Cut a lid from the top of the watermelon, scoop out the fruit, and attach a keg shank to the bottom.

Summe Entert

For a gorgeous table centerpiece, fill a long box or crate with cheerful Gerber daisies.

Beach ball cake pops are an adorable summertime treat. Instructions at bakerella.com.

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For a new twist on a old favorite, cut your hot dogs into spirals. Spiral cut hot dogs have more surface area so you have more grill flavor, and once in the bun, the spiral cut leaves lots of slots for relish and other toppings. To get this cut, slide a skewer through the hot dog, then take a knife and start cutting at top of the hot dog at a slight angle till the edge of the knife is up against the wood skewer. Roll the hot dog forward to start cutting a spiral.


Bring western style to your bbq’s and picnics by setting the flatware in mason jars with bandana napkins.

er taining!

Use fresh fruit to decorate a large sugar cookie to look like a beach ball. Blue: blueberries, blackberries, or purple grapes. Red: Raspberries, red grapes, watermelon, strawberries, or currants. Yellow: Pineapple, yellow melon, or yellow peaches. Green: kiwi or honeydew. Orange: apricots or cantaloupe, oranges, or ripe peaches. White: banana, pears, or apples. Optional Sand: crushed graham crackers. Tutorial & Photography by hungryhappenings.com.

Layer small Dixie cups with juices of different colors for beautiful and healthy rainbow ices. Use pomegranate juice, orange juice, grape juice and lemonade dyed with food coloring. Make sure to freeze each layer before pouring a new layer.

On a sweltering summer day, few kids can resist running through the cool spray of a sprinkler. The Deluxe Kid Wash brings the magic of a car wash to your backyard. Crafted almost entirely of PVC pipes, pool noodles, and sponges. Instructions at familylicious.com.

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Accepting Our Children

and Their Challenges By Mrs. Renelle Maslaton As both a general education and special education teacher, and now as part of the administrative team of a girls school, I get to work with many children and their parents. I notice a recurring issue that seems to affect many parents, and inadvertently, their children. The good thing about this problem is that once it is brought to parents’ attention, they can work on remedying the situation.

through. It seems to us that it is “just not fair” or it “just can’t be” that MY child has a problem. My child must be perfect! The problem is when this is the message we tell ourselves. Not overtly of course, because we are mature adults. But it sneaks into our subconscious and there it festers, influencing our thoughts, conversations, and actions. These negative thought processes even inhibit our children from emerging from their challenging situation!

The problem is called “acceptance.” What can we do about it?

“Rivka is very bright, but I get so frustrated when she gets stuck on her reading…” “My Moshe has a handwriting that looks like chicken scrawl, I can’t imagine what he is doing in school when they practice handwriting…” “Homework is no problem at all for my daughter, I don’t know what her teacher is complaining about…” “What a temper Shmuel has! He blows up any time something does not go his way…” Every parent wishes for their children to be perfect in every way, to be models of derech eretz and middot, models of exemplary behavior, and of course, model students. What happens when things aren’t quite as we hoped for?

“When Rivka stumbles over words I think she should know, I get so upset at her and so tense… and I know she is cringing inside…” “I tell Moshe every night that his handwriting is terrible, but he just writes faster and messier…” “Morah Cohen just doesn’t know what a treasure my daughter is, she keeps telling me that Sarah is falling behind in her math skills but I think she is doing just fine!” “Every time Shmuel blows up I tell him what a terrible avera anger is, but he doesn’t even hear me, and he continues screaming…” Sometimes we find it too difficult to accept our children for who they are, or to accept a challenging situation that they are going

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Rabbi Ezriel Tauber describes four components of hinuch that would help us put our thoughts in order: 1- What we are supposed to do 2- Why we are supposed to do it 3- How exactly to do it 4- Outcome What area should we be investing most of our energies in? What area is most important? Hint: it does not match the area most frequently used! “Why” is necessary to motivate our children to do what is right. To be sure, parents should not always give a reason for everything, and there are times when a child must listen “just because Mommy/


Abba said.” But how much more palatable the misvot, or anything that must get done, become when we can provide explanation!

is doing the best he/she can under the circumstances; my job is to help in a positive way, and to constantly beg Hashem that our efforts be met with success.”

“How” is also critical because once a child is motivated to do something, we must explain the steps and provide the tools for them to carry it out properly.

To our children, we can learn to say: “I see that this is an area that is difficult. Every person has something that is difficult for him/her. That’s fine! My job as your parent is to help you, and when we work on it together, we will pray that Hashem will help too.”

It is the “What” department that parents frequent the most. “Just read it already!” “Write neatly!” “Practice your flashcards!” “Stop screaming!” The fourth category, “Outcome,” is the one that may be hard to come to terms with, for it is the only one that is not in our hands. As much as we would like to be in control of our children, ultimately the outcome lies in the hands of Hashem alone. This is apparent in today’s children more than ever; we see children who flourish despite having a difficult home situation, and children who despite having the best parents, just don’t make it in the ways that we hope for. Although the Outcome remains out of our grasp, our children remain ours, and our responsibility alone. To deposit them on the doorstep of school each morning with the attitude of “Good, now the school will take care of their issues,” may seem like an opportune escape. But as much as a school cares, the parents’ responsibility is never-ending. And although the “Outcome” category is solely up to Hashem, He has blessed us with these particular children; we have a responsibility to each child, and to their Father in Heaven, to put our efforts into the other three categories. What is it that we are responsible to do? Firstly, to accept. To accept each child for who he is, to accept the challenges that he has, and the difficulties that are thereby presented us. Once we accept, we are not in panic mode anymore. The challenge is no longer an annoying blip on our radar screen, but a defined challenge that we will learn to accept and confront head-on. It is an inner avoda on our part, often in the area most challenging for us to accept in our child. And then to respect; to respect each individual child by explaining as best as we can what we are asking of him and why. Once we provide him with whatever intervention we deem appropriate, we must accept that despite our best efforts, the Outcome is up to Hashem. And all the while, we must pray for His assistance. For all of the above scenarios, and countless others, we can learn to say to ourselves: “My child is a pikadon from Hashem. This is the situation Hashem has deemed perfect for my child in this world. He has created him like this, He has presented him with this challenge, and He has also given him the tools to deal with it! My child

When these are the tapes we are consciously playing over and over and we have these messages reverberating in our minds, automatically our thought processes shift. We explore possibilities for helping our children deal with their particular situations. We may read books on specific subjects, ask our child’s school for recommendations, find out what has been successful for others with similar challenges, learn what resources are available, consult with Rabbanim or professionals. Our exchanges with our children take on a more hopeful, optimistic tone:

“Rivka, reading has a lot of rules, and it can be hard to remember them sometimes…I took a course on reading and I’ve learned some tricks! We are going to work on this together…” “Moshe, sometimes it can be difficult to get your letters to sit on the lines, or to form them properly…some other children I know have this problem too, and there is a special teacher called an OT who was able to help them. We are going to meet her to see how she can help you too.” “Sarah, Morah Cohen tells me how nicely you participate in her class, and how you are so respectful and wellbehaved! I am so proud to hear that. She also mentioned that you can use some extra help in math. How would you feel about our neighbor Rachel coming to help you out? We can try it out for two weeks and see how it goes.” “Shmuel, I notice that it is difficult when things don’t go exactly how you would like. Did you know that Hashem created anger so we can protect ourselves, and so we will be motivated to take care of dangerous situations? There is a positive side to anger, but it needs to be channeled properly. I spoke to a very smart person who knows all about this, and we are going to hang up a chart…” May Hashem grant us the clarity of mind to view our children through a positive lens, and to accept each one of them with their particular challenges. May Hashem bless us that our efforts on behalf of each child be met with successful outcomes!

Renelle Maslaton, M.S.Ed, is Dean of Bet Yaakov Orot Sarah.

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Decorating with Wall Decals By Rina Fine Are you a wallpaper commitmentphobe? While I love the idea of wallpaper, it’s also scary; when you get sick of it, trying to remove it can be a nightmare. Wall decals are the perfect solution. Most of the wall stickers on the market today can be removed very easily and reused elsewhere. Perhaps it will even be a baby step toward committing to wallpaper. If you don’t want to commit to a permanent paint color or wallpaper, using decals are an affordable and creative way to change up any room. Your only limitation is your imagination! Like other home decorating elements, wall stickers are available in a wide variety of patterns, colors, shapes and designs, thus imparting home owners with a great versatility to decorate their homes. The well liked and the most universal designs of wall stickers are geometrical patterns, architectural designs and flowers. These designs can easily be incorporated into any room, and they are known to blend perfectly with the existing decoration.


Office # 718-645-6711 Emergency # 718-813-2515

Extensions • New Homes • Small Renovations

Architects & Designers available

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Treating Strep By Dr. Jack Sadacka, M.D.

Soreness that grips the throat is one of the leading complaints that bring people to the doctor’s office. Though some are quick to suspect strep, it can be a viral bacteria that may be just as painful, it nevertheless may clear up on its own without medical treatment. On the other hand, a person exhibiting strep throat will begin to develop the following symptoms within 1-3 days: lower stomach pain, headache, loss of appetite, nausea, rash, painful swallowing, fever, tender swollen lymph nodes, swollen tonsils, stiff joints or fatigue. Strep throat is most commonly found in school aged children and teens, with a peak incidence between 5 to 15 years of age. It is estimated that approximately 40% of cases of sore throat in the stated age group are caused by the streptococcus bacteria. In addition, strep mostly occur when students are enclosed in closed quarters for long periods. Adults may develop strep, though less commonly. During the physical exam your doctor will ask you about your symptoms and past health. Your pediatrician will likely perform a rapid strep test which takes approximately five minutes. If the latter is negative, still, your symptoms suggest that you do have strep, the doctor will send a sample of a throat culture, the gold standard in diagnosing streptococcal pharyngitis. The results should be available in a couple of days. Throat swabbing is not dangerous but it can be uncomfortable. You or your child may experience some gagging when the swab touches the back of the throat. Cells are gathered with a cotton swab then placed in a container with substances that promote growth of the strep bacteria. Should the bacteria grow the culture is positive.

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Recommended remedies for both strep and non-strep throat are geared towards relieving symptoms and do not replace antibiotics in cases of proven strep infection. Saltwater gargle is an old sore throat therapy, ½ tsp. of salt water to approximately 8 ounces warm water. Use portions of this solution a few times daily. Please note: not for children under 8 years of age. Lozenges are helpful for symptomatic relief of sore and dry throats. Menthol or anti-inflammatory agents also used in some cough drops. Please note: not for children under 4 years of age. Hydration is very important to support your kidneys in eliminating toxins: chicken soup, warm tea with honey, and cold beverages (though acidic juices such orange juice, tend to irritate sore throats). Ice cream and popsicles are a helpful treat! When fighting an ailment, it is even more pivotal to get your eight hours of sleep. Sleep allows your body to repair itself and renew your energy. Should you be concerned about serious illnesses if you contract strep? Though millions of Americans nationwide get strep throat every year, less than one in a million will develop a flesh eating disease or streptococcal toxic shock syndrome. Other ailments related to strep are otitis media, sinusitis, retropharyngeal abscess, infection of the lymph nodes of the neck or pediatric neuropsychiatric disorder (PANDAS). Common examples of antibiotics that your doctor may prescribe are clarithromycin, cephalosporin, amoxicillin and many others. Some patients having strep may also need pain relievers such as ibuprofen and acetaminophen.

Group A streptococcus tends to hang out in the nose and throat thus sneezing and coughing causes tiny droplets of the strep bacteria to travel in the air. Hence, others get infected. Currently there is no vaccine available to prevent strep throat.

Treating your sore throat is fast and simple, provided you take proper care and medications. Above all, remember, prevention is better than a cure.

Of course proper hygiene is the best prevention. Washing hands with warm soapy water as you touch people, surfaces, and objects throughout the day. Never share personal items such as utensils, dishes, drinking glasses or towels.

Dr. Jack Sadacka M.D. is a Board Certified Pediatrician in practice for 20 years. Serving the community at 813 Quentin Road.



You Are What You Eat Peaches • One large peach, about 2 3/4 inches in diameter, contains just 68 calories and no fat. Peaches are naturally sweet and can replace some of the added sugars in your diet. Use them to top unsweetened whole-grain cereal, plain yogurt or plain low-fat cottage cheese, instead of choosing versions of these foods sweetened with highfructose corn syrup or cane sugar. • Peaches should be stored at room temperature and refrigeration should be avoided as this can lessen the taste of the peach. Peaches are climacteric- they will continue ripening after being picked from the tree. Choose peaches with a strong, sweet smell and a yellowish golden background color. A red blush does not necessarily mean the fruit is ripe. Peaches should be firm, or “give” slightly at time of purchase. • Peaches are best eaten raw. When they are cooked or boiled, they lose up to 80% of their nutrients, especially Vitamin C. • They provide 2.6 g dietary fiber, or more than 10 percent of the daily value for fiber, and 18 mg phytosterols, or a comparable amount to olive oil or vegetables. Fiber and phytosterols are plant-based nutrients, and they lower your cholesterol levels.

Spinach • Low in calories and high in vitamins, spinach is one of the most nutrient-dense foods in existence. One cup of contains far more than your daily requirements of vitamin K and vitamin A, almost all the manganese and folate your body needs and nearly 40 percent of your magnesium requirement. It is an excellent source of more than 20 different measurable nutrients, including dietary fiber, calcium and protein. 1 cup has only 40 calories. • Spinach contains more than a dozen individual flavonoid compounds, which work together as cancer-fighting antioxidants. • The flavonoids in spinach help protect against age related memory loss. • Spinach’s secret weapon, lutein, makes it one of the best foods in the world to prevent cataracts, as well as age related macular degeneration. Foods rich in lutein are also thought to help prevent cancer. • Spinach is an excellent promoter of cardiovascular health. The antioxidant properties of spinach (water-soluble in the form of vitamin C and fat-soluble beta-carotene) work together to promote good cardiovascular health by preventing the harmful oxidation of cholesterol. Oxidized cholesterol is a danger to the heart and arteries. Magnesium in spinach works toward healthy blood pressure levels. In fact, just a salad-size portion of spinach will work to lower high blood pressure within hours. • Adding any citrus fruit to a smoothie containing raw spinach increases your body’s ability to absorb many of the beneficial nutrients in spinach, including iron. Raw spinach also contains higher proportions of vitamin C and the antioxidant gluathione than cooked spinach. While raw spinach contains a significant amount of oxalate, a substance that binds to calcium and prevents its absorption, the overall decrease in available calcium for healthy individuals is relatively small, and is taken into account in the determination of the daily recommended intake values for calcium.

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Detox

10 Ways To Help Your Body Detoxification is about resting, cleaning and nourishing the body from the inside out. By removing and eliminating toxins, then feeding your body with healthy nutrients, detoxifying can help protect you from disease and renew your ability to maintain optimum health.

become well known for its cleansing ability.

Your body detoxifies naturally every day by using the lymphatic system, liver, kidneys, lungs and skin but with the increase in pollution, processed foods, chemicals that are going in to our body and with our lifestyle added on top e.g. stress, illnesses, lack of exercise or unhealthy eating habits, these interfere with our body’s ability to cleanse itself and it doesn’t work as efficiently in eliminating all of the toxins, so it is a good idea to lend a helping hand.

5. Reduce or eliminate processed foods. Processed foods are generally high in sugar, salt, additives and saturated fats (including trans fats). These foods increase the amount of toxins in your body and provide no natural antioxidants, vitamins or minerals. Your liver’s performance can be affected by these types of food and if it is not working properly it will not be able to detoxify as fast as it should be.

When the body has to expend more energy ridding itself of toxins, it has less energy to use on other body functions such as digestion and cell repair. If you’re feeling run down, your skin is lacking luster, suffering from breakouts, or having difficulty losing weight, give your body a boost with some easy detoxing methods. First, lighten up your toxin load. Eliminate alcohol, coffee, cigarettes, refined sugars and saturated fats, all of which act as toxins in the body and are obstacles to your healing process. Also, minimize use of chemical-based household cleaners and personal health care products (cleansers, shampoos, deodorants and toothpastes), and substitute with natural alternatives. Here are a 10 easy ways you can help your body eliminate toxins: 1. Eat plenty of fiber, including brown rice and organicallygrown fresh fruits and vegetables. Beets, radishes, artichokes, cabbage, broccoli, spirulina, chlorella, and seaweed are excellent detoxifying foods. 2. Exercise. By exercising, you accelerate the detoxification process by increasing your blood and lymph circulation which in turn increases the removal of waste products in your cells. Toxins are also stored in fat deposits so the greater amount fat deposits in your body the more areas for toxins to accumulate. By exercising you will be reducing your body fat and the toxins will be released into your body and be able to be removed. Other benefits of exercise include sweating which is another way for the body to remove toxins. 3. Drink green tea which is a potent antioxidant and has

4. Add a lemon wedge to a cup of hot water and drink, this will help cleanse your liver. Lemon also contains vitamin C which is an antioxidant and helps rid the body of toxins.

6. Dry skin brushing. By dry brushing your skin you will be increasing lymphatic circulation which helps eliminate toxins through the skin. Use a dry brush and brush in the direction towards your heart. 7. Eat foods known for their antioxidants. Antioxidants are vitamins, minerals and nutrients that protect and repair cells from free radicals. So eat more foods that contain one of these vitamins: beta-carotene, vitamin C and vitamin E. Foods such as asparagus, broccoli, carrots, grapefruit, oranges, cauliflower, spinach, peppers, pumpkin, papaya, mangoes – some of these foods contain all 3 of the above vitamins. 8. Drink water. Water is needed to keep your body functioning properly. By drinking 8 glasses per day you will be keeping your kidneys working to their best ability and helping flush out toxins and waste products from your body. 9. Perspire. We can eliminate toxins through sweating, so get a good workout or head into the sauna. 10. Reduce Stress. Stress triggers your body to release stress hormones into your system. While these hormones can provide the “adrenaline rush” to win a race or meet a deadline, in large amounts they create toxins and slow down detoxification enzymes in the liver. So it’s a good idea to detox stressful life situations along with detoxifying your body. Take some time off if necessary, maybe try meditation, yoga, read a good book, have a massage. Do anything that helps you relax. Just like you wouldn’t clean your house once or twice a year, consider detoxing as part of regular maintenance of your body.

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The Professor’s Perspective... By: Professor Jordan Leibniz (no, of course that’s not my real name)

Dear Professor, I have worked in a firm for several years, and I’m frustrated with my position. I’ve gotten to a point where I can no longer grow within the company since it is a family run business, and I am not part of that family. Although I am more than qualified to be promoted, this is an impossibility. I am ready to leave the company and start my own business with the training, expertise, and contacts that I have acquired with my time here. Would it be ethically inappropriate for me to use these resources and compete with the company that has trained me? - Aspiring Climber Dear Climber, Before you consider the ethics, make sure you know what you are permitted to do legally. If your employer had you sign a noncompete or nonsolicitation agreement then you are bound by those terms at a minimum. Ethically you might feel like doing more than required of you, out of gratitude to your employer who gave you your start in the career. My feeling is that you can and should go start your own business if you feel that is better for you than staying in your current job. Since you are employed “at will” you may leave for any reason, and if you feel that your boss is taking you for granted that is certainly a very good reason. But don’t hang your shingle out on the same street and pull business away from your current employer even if you can legally. And don’t actively take away his clients. That just fosters bad feelings. Find a place where you won’t step on each other’s toes or where there is enough business for both of you. Dear Professor, My husband and I work very hard during the week, and we greatly look forward to resting on Shabbat afternoon. It upsets us very much when all the neighborhood kids congregate in our neighbor’s yard to play for hours at a time. We’ve asked them several times to either keep their voices down or find somewhere else to play, but this only quiets them down for a few minutes at a time. Are we being unreasonable or are they? Should we

44

speak to the children’s parents about this? I don’t want to have problems with the neighbors, but they should have some consideration too! - Tired and Cranky Dear Tired, Sorry to say, but you are being very unreasonable here. Children playing during the daytime is no one’s idea of inconsiderate. The fact that you want to rest in the middle of the day is simply your own problem. If your complaint was that it is hard to nap in the afternoon because you want dark and the sunlight is disturbing you, would you ask the sun to shine somewhere else? It’s up to you to block out the light - or the noise - coming from outside your house. A couple of suggestions I have are closing the windows and running an air conditioner on fan mode, or getting a white noise machine to neutralize the other sounds. Noise cancelling headphones or earplugs are also options if you don’t find them too uncomfortable. Of course, if you were being subjected to unreasonably loud noise - think along the lines of a loud drum set or amplified music - you would have every right to complain. The same goes for late at night. But don’t expect sympathy for complaining about children playing normally in the middle of the day. Dear Professor, Funds are tight in our household and we are careful with how we spend our money. My wife refuses to buy anything considered “a luxury” for herself and also refuses to accept them as gifts from me, even on special occasions like her birthday! I am considering opening up a separate bank account under my name and to have a little money from my paycheck sent to that account so that I could surprise her at the end of the year with something special and more extravagant than she would budget for herself. Would this be wrong of me to do or would it make me the best husband ever? - If I Were a Rich Man


Dear Tevye, Sounds like your wife has control issues with finances, and doesn’t include you in making financial decisions. It’s good to be careful and to live within your means, but mutual respect is a foundation of marriage. Not accepting gifts from you because she thinks you shouldn’t have spent the money is infantilizing. Ultimately, the two of you need to agree on whether giving each other gifts is “in the budget” and how much. I do not think that creating an unseen bank account is the solution. In the first place, it involves deceiving your wife by hiding money from her. Second, you don’t know that she will react any differently to your gift bought from this account than she does today. But it could work if you discuss it at the outset, and agree to each take a small “allowance” from the budget each month, with no questions asked about where it is spent. Then if you choose not to spend it, you’d have the slush fund for gifts. But please deal with the control issue. Really.

Do you agree, disagree, or have something to say? Add to the discussion by emailing the professor. Email your questions & comments to professor@elegantimpressions.com.

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By Avi Fishoff & Yaakov Shain

Chapter 5: Tough Love or Love Tough? GPS! Navigation for Your Soul

Looking at punishment through heavenly eyes ‫ אמר לו דוד לעולם אין [אתה] בא עלינו בדין‬:‫"רבון העולמים‬ ”!‫אלא במדת רחמים‬ ‫פסיקתא רבתי (איש שלום) פיסקא מ‘ בחודש השביעי‬

Dovid HaMelech said: “Master of the universe, You never deal with us strictly, ONLY WITH MERCY.”

Hashem

‫"ומעץ הדעת טוב ורע לא תאכל ממנו כי ביום‬ ”.‫אכלך ממנו מות תמות‬

is the ultimate loving Father, so let’s see how He deals with rebellious children:

“You may not eat from the tree of knowledge of good and bad, for on the day that you eat from it you shall die.”

‫"בכל מקום במה שנזכר פעם ראשונה בתורה‬ ”.‫שם הוא שורש הדבר‬

Unfortunately, Adam and Chavah were unable to restrain themselves from this one restriction and the ramifications were horrendous! Hashem’s beautiful, serene, and perfect world was completely DESTROYED with just one bite!!

‫פרי צדיק במדבר ראש חודש תמוז‬

In order to understand a concept, we must examine the very first time that concept is mentioned in the Torah, for there we will find the source of the matter. So let’s travel back in time and examine the very first major human failure. Nu, so who do you think was the very first human failure? You got it! The very first human ever created! And guess how long it took for him to make such a massive mistake that would forever change the entire vision of G-d’s new project, “Earth”? Yup, you got it — he messed up on the very first day!

”.‫"ויקח ה' אלקים את האדם וינחהו בגן עדן‬ ‫טו‬:‫בראשית פרק ב‬

The Torah says: “Hashem took Adam and placed him in Gan Eden.”

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in our daily lives were simply not there! The world was a perfect place: heaven on earth.

Hashem created a beautiful world. There was no sickness, no death, no stress, no hardship, no labor pains, and no need to ever work! All the challenges and difficulties we experience

‫יז‬:‫בראשית פרק ב‬

... ‫"וישלחהו ה' אלקים מגן עדן‬ ”.... ‫ויגרש את האדם‬ ‫כד‬-‫כג‬:‫בראשית פרק ג‬

“… and Hashem sent him out of Gan Eden… and He banished the man ….” George began to become financially successful and in his travels he became friendly with a very wealthy man who owned a dream oceanfront mansion. As a surprise birthday present, the man let George and his wife spend a week in the exquisite mansion. The man made just one request: Please do not


go onto the rooftop balcony. When George and his wife arrived, their mouths dropped open as they walked around the home and gazed in awe at the perfectly manicured property. They were truly enjoying themselves; however, each time they passed by the staircase leading to the roof, they had to suppress an inner urge to see what the magnificent view would look like from up there. George’s wife Chavah started talking to him about how wonderful it would be to be able to go onto the roof. After all, what could possibly be better than watching sunrise from there? He tried to talk her out of it but after a while, his curiosity got the better of him. At 4:25 a.m., they woke up to watch the sunrise. They quietly … carefully … slowly … opened the latch and pulled down the staircase leading to the roof … slowly they climbed stair after stair and ascended to the roof … when suddenly … CRASH! They fell through the broken glass roof and dropped three stories! They ended up in full body casts and wheelchair bound for the rest of their lives! The owner was furious with them: I told you not to go up on the roof because I knew the glass sunroof was broken and it was UNSAFE for you to go there! I made the request for YOUR BENEFIT and you couldn’t listen??? Hashem gave Adam and Chavah everything … but asked that they refrain from just ONE thing! They didn’t listen and indeed, there were very severe consequences. Hashem literally threw Adam and Chavah out of Paradise and initiated new concepts: sickness, death, labor and child-rearing pains, and the need to painfully work for a living. Another outcome of eating the forbidden fruit was the realization that they were unclothed. This was a pretty big problem for them since they were really far away from Woodbury Commons! So what did they do? They actually tried to make clothing for themselves by sewing fig leaves together. That’s right — leaves! Hashem was watching this situation unfold. It was pretty sad and a little funny, seeing them figure out how to sew leaves together and trying to tailor them to actually stay on and fit properly.

needed clothing in the first place was because they defied the will of Hashem!?!?!

‫"רצה ליחס פעולת ההלבשה אליו יתברך‬ ‫להורות על אהבתו וחמלתו על יצוריו‬ ”!!!‫שאף על פי שחטאו לא זז מחבבן‬ ‫כא‬:‫רבינו בחיי בראשית ג‬

Brace yourself for this amazing answer: Adam and Chavah might have mistakenly thought that after they messed up and were consequently thrown out of Paradise, Hashem no longer cared about them! And that attitude would have been passed down to their children and the entire world would have been founded on the false impression that Hashem doesn’t care about us humans anymore! Hashem performed this menial tailoring task Himself specifically to prove to Adam and Chavah that in spite of their horrific failure to adhere to His one and only request, His love and care for them was not diminished whatsoever!

‫"והוא (ה') בעצמו השתדל בתקונם ובגמילות‬ ‫חסדים עשה להם מלבושים מעולים ונכבדים מעור‬ ”!‫ויתעטפו כל גופם דרך כבוד‬ ‫כא‬:‫רבינו בחיי בראשית ג‬

Hashem Himself helped them with their clothing crisis and personally made them high-quality and distinguished leather clothing that covered them in a comfortable and honorable way! Hashem didn’t make them low-quality clothing! “Here’s jeans and a t-shirt!” No way! “Only the best for My precious children!” You would think that they had done something really special to deserve such great personal treatment!

But wait — it gets even better: From where did Hashem take this leather material?

”!‫"ויעש לאדם ולאשתו לבושי כבוד מעור הנחש‬ ‫כא‬:‫כתר יונתן בראשית פרק ג‬

The leather came from the very snake that caused them to sin!

Then the Torah tells us Something absolutely remarkable: ‫"ויעש ה' אלקים לאדם ולאשתו‬ ”.‫כתנות עור וילבשם‬ ‫כא‬:‫בראשית ג‬

“Hashem made leather garments for Adam and his wife and He clothed them.” Hashem decided to step in and help them with their wardrobe predicament! Incredible! Amazing! Why on earth did Hashem do this for them? What did they do to earn this personal treatment — especially when you consider that the only reason they

Perhaps Hashem specifically chose to use the leather skin of the snake so that Adam could comfort himself by remembering that it was only due to the outside influence of the scheming snake that he now needed clothing to cover his pure holy essence! In addition, there is a deeper lesson to be learned as well: There is a well-known story of R’ Amnon Yitzchok shlit”a who held up a boy’s ponytail in front of a large audience and said; Do you know how long it takes to grow one of these? This is what young people are willing to give up to return to Torah.” He held the ponytail high and with a big smile he proclaimed; “Zeh shel Ashkenazi … blondie!” Then he lifted another pony and said; “V’zeh shel Taimoni … krinkie!” and he showed everyone the

47


frizzy hair of a Yemenite boy. Then he pulled out a very long black ponytail “V’zeh shel Sepharadi!” He then explained that these boys would only give up their ponytails if they were really convinced that the Torah was true.

GPS! Navigation for Your Soul

He then held up a box with hundreds of earrings and proclaimed to the audience, “After Klal Yisrael left Mitzrayim they gave their earrings to make an Eigel HaZahav [Golden Calf ]. Today these men are giving up their earrings to return to Torah! When we have enough, we will use them to make a crown for a Sefer Torah!” Immediately a young man came forward from the audience, removing his earring as he walked. He was followed by another and another. Scores of earrings were dropped into the box to build the Sefer Torah’s new crown. Source http://www.rabbiyy.com/essays/ Amnon%20Yitzchak.htm

The Torah shows us that even Hashem’s ihsv ,sn (which we mistakenly think is the angry, uncaring, strict arm of the law) also agreed to personally care for Adam and Chavah’s clothing needs — even after their horrific sin! Consequences? YES! Turn My back on you? NEVER! Although Adam and Chavah had to be severely punished, the fact was that now — for whatever reason — they had a need for clothing and they had no idea how to make clothing for themselves. Hashem’s response was: My dear children, even though you have this need only because you defied My explicit command, I still love you and care about the needs you have in whatever situation you find yourself! Hashem showed us by example that the need to punish is not the need to hate! Authentic Yiddishkeit believes that not only should we not lose any affection for those we must punish, Hashem showed us by example that it is UP TO THE “PUNISHER” to make sure that the “PUNISHEE” never feels that you don’t care about him anymore. It seemed hard to believe that after raising four wonderful children, that child number five would be so difficult. The parents tried everything … yet Naftali fell more and more.

Perhaps the reason that Hashem chose to create their new garments specifically from the snake that caused them to sin was to emphasize that even the biggest failure of your life — can be used to clothe yourself with honor!

But wait — it gets even better: ‫"שהלבישם הקב"ה מיני מעלות ומאורות‬ ‫מן האור העליון שהיו בגן עדן‬ ”!‫כעין משה שזכה להן בהר‬ ‫כא‬:‫רבינו בחיי בראשית ג‬

Hashem enveloped them in a spiritual light, from the light of Gan Eden, similar to the light that Moshe Rabbeinu received at the pinnacle of his attachment to Hashem on Har Sinai! All of this shows us that even after we messed up in such a terrible way, Hashem still: (1) supplied us with magnificent clothing, (2) inspired us to not give up on ourselves, (3) and gave us a spiritual light to enable us to repent and return to Him.

Let’s learn another amazing lesson from this story: ‫"ויעש ה' אלקים לאדם ולאשתו‬ ”.‫כתנות עור וילבשם‬ ‫כא‬:‫בראשית ג‬

We know that “‫ ”ה‬reflects mingxd zcn, the characteristic of mercy, and “miwl`” reflects oicd zcn, the characteristic of

48

strict justice. When the Torah describes Hashem making these amazing garments for Adam and Chava, it refers to G-d as “miwl` 'd”

at and

His father begged him not to hang out with certain boys in the neighborhood, but Naftali didn’t listen. One thing led to another and things became completely unmanageable home. Naftali became Neil dropped out of school. He

would stay out all night, get into all kinds of trouble, and he did not respect anything his parents asked of him. Naftali sank down the slippery slope of the underground street world. No kashrus, no tefillin, no yarmulka, no Shabbos, and no respect for any of the things so dear to his family for dozens of generations. It didn’t take long for Neil to become jobless, penniless, and homeless. On the first cold winter day Naftali had a surprise visitor — his father. “It’s getting really cold outside and I figured that you probably don’t have a proper coat, so I bought you a really nice, expensive name-brand leather jacket with a fur lining — the one you always wanted!”


When a child realizes that you truly care about him — then he might utilize your punishments properly and it can have a positive effect on him. Whereas if the child thinks that since he disappointed you, you now care less about him — the punishment will not have as much of a positive effect on him and, in fact, it may have a negative effect on him.

How does this apply to you and me? When you take an honest look at your real inner spiritual level and connection to Hashem and you consider how many foolish sins you’ve done, your automatic instinct may be to shrink away from facing Hashem and from Yiddishkeit. After all, you are a “flop” to Hashem, a “disaster” to your religion, and a “loser” to your nation! But now you know that such reasoning is completely false! In fact, it was never your Yetzer Tov that led you to that conclusion; it was the Yetzer Hora that caused you first to sin and then convinced you that you are no longer wanted by Hashem, your religion, and your nation! Your mission now is to stop allowing those crooked thoughts to control you and to begin to think like Authentic Yiddishkeit:

‫"אהבתו יתברך לישראל היא אהבה‬ ”!‫שאינה תלויה בדבר ואינה בטלה לעולם‬ ‫נתיבות שלום חלק ב' דף רנ"ב‬

Hashem’s love toward you is not contingent on anything that you need to do! That is why, even if you commit the worst sins and fall to the lowest spiritual level — His love toward you is not diminished whatsoever and can never be damaged. Authentic Yiddishkeit believes that Judaism is not just for saints; in fact much of the Torah speaks directly to sinners and constantly teaches us the same message, over and over! Hashem's response to even the worst sinner is: YOU are My child! I LOVE YOU! I am rooting for you and I am patient beyond your comprehension! Don’t ever think that I am sick of you! Come back to Me … yes — even after what you did I still want you right here next to Me, where you belong!

We still have one more thing to think about: ‫"ומעץ הדעת טוב ורע לא תאכל ממנו כי ביום‬ ”.‫אכלך ממנו מות תמות‬

In fact, the angels asked Hashem, “Didn’t You decree that the punishment for eating from the tree is that Adam would die THAT DAY — how then did Adam continue to live?”

‫"שלא פירש לו אם יום משלו או יום של הקדוש‬ ‫ והוא חיה תשע‬... !‫ברוך הוא שהוא אלף שנים‬ ”.‫מאות ושלשים והניח לבניו שבעים שנה‬ ‫פסיקתא רבתי (יש שלום) פיסקא מ' בחודש השביעי‬

Hashem explained that when He said that on the “day” you eat from it you shall die, He did not specify whether it meant a “day” in human time — 24 hours — or one of Hashem’s days, which is equal to 1000 human years — which is over 8,700,000 hours! Pretty innovative! We see that even when we think that our fate is signed and sealed, Hashem’s endless compassion and mercy can always find a way to help us and we don’t need to worry about “how” it will work out with the letter of the law! Hashem is the greatest Lawyer in the world and He knows every trick in the book! You’re in good hands!

‫"חיי דוד המלך שבעים ואלו שבעים שנה‬ ”.‫חסרו מאדם הראשון‬ ‫אוצר המדרשים פנחס בן יאיר‬

Indeed, because of the sin, Adam was sentenced to live for “only” ONE of Hashem’s days, meaning ONE THOUSAND years! Adam then “donated” seventy of his years to Dovid HaMelech and lived for 930 years.

:‫ רבון העולמים‬:‫"אמר דוד‬ ... ‫אילולי שדנת את אדם הראשון ברחמים‬ ".... ‫לא חיה אפילו שעה אחת‬ ‫פסיקתא רבתי (איש שלום) פיסקא מ' בחודש השביעי‬ Dovid HaMelech said: “Master of the universe: Had You not judged Adam with mercy, I would have not lived for even one moment!”

‫"וכשם שדנת אותו ברחמים כן אתה‬ ”!‫דן את כל הדורות אחריו לעולם‬ ‫פסיקתא רבתי (איש שלום) פיסקא מ' בחודש השביעי‬

“And just as You judged him with mercy … may You judge all future generations forever!”

!!!‫אמן ואמן‬

‫יז‬:‫בראשית פרק ב‬

“You may not eat from the tree of knowledge of good and bad, for on the day that you eat from it you shall die.”

‫ לא כך גזרת עליו כי ביום אכלך‬... ‫"רבונו של עולם‬ ”?‫ממנו מות תמות‬ ‫פסיקתא רבתי (איש שלום) פיסקא מ׳ בחודש השביעי‬

To reach the authors: GPSFORYOURSOUL@gmail.com GPS! Navigation for Your Soul takes some of the brilliant concepts and themes of Nesivos Shalom and "translates" them into contemporary language and terms. You will find answers to fundamental questions like: How can I know if Hashem still loves me? Is my essence damaged from the sins that I have done? Why does Hashem make me suffer? What is the current phase of our exile all about? And many, many more!

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