The Courier 1206

Your pull-out guide to this year’s Stan Calvert Cup inside Full results in next week’s The Courier - out Tuesday 2 March

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C OU RI E R THE INDEPENDENT VOICE OF NEWCASTLE STUDENTS

EST 1948

Issue 1206 Monday 22 February 2010 www.thecourieronline.co.uk

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Home from home: University’s new Malaysia campus

News, page 5

Inside today >>> Bigger and better The new extension to Eldon Square brings even more shopping choice to the city centre News, page 3

Forever young A team of researchers based at Newcastle claim to have unlocked the secret to ageing News, page 4

Blaming the grandparents Has the search to lay blame for growing numbers of obese children gone too far?

Comment, page 12

The full monty

Vision for the future: Newcastle University’s Malaysia campus is set to open in 2011 and aims to be the academic hub of Asia. Above is an artist’s impression of its new library

Legendary male strip act The Chippendales speak to The Courier ahead of their show in Newcastle this week Culture, page 25

Finance boss cools talk of University job losses

Two men in Milan

Dale insists lecturers’ jobs are safe despite government funding cuts

‘I’m a profoundly deaf coeliac with Hodgkin’s lymphoma and I’m happy - most of the time anyway’

David Coverdale Editor Newcastle University’s Executive Director of Finance, Richard Dale, has promised lecturers that their jobs at the University are secure for the time being despite the government’s plans to slash university budgets by £449 million next year.

However, Dale admits that while the University is currently in “good shape� to cope with the cuts, the future is uncertain until after the general election which he believes is likely to bring far worse news regarding funds for higher education.

Dale’s comments come after the University and College Union (UCU) said that 6,000 university jobs were already at risk across the UK and 9,000 more could go in England alone, with Leeds University

staff planning strikes this week.

The controversial announcement of cuts was made by the Higher Education Funding Council for England (HEFCE) earlier this month and it is estimated that universities will lose a total of ÂŁ950 million over the next three years.

Newcastle will suffer more than the rest of the sector as a whole this year with HEFCE planning to withdraw ÂŁ40 million from funding for old and historic buildings, around which Newcastle bases its campus.

Dale told The Courier: “We believe our core academic base is one we want to keep. The closure of schools, departments and courses is not on our to-do list and that will be absolutely the last thing we would want to do. “What we don’t know is what will

happen after the general election and we can’t plan for what we don’t know yet.

ÂŁ950 million

7KH Âż JXUH ZKLFK LW LV HVWLPDWHG universities will lose in funding over the next three years “If the day after the general election they say it’s 50% off funding then clearly what we’ve done won’t be enough. “Everyone is nervous at the moment and that’s understandable.â€?

It is estimated that the HEFCE cuts will leave Newcastle University ÂŁ1 PLOOLRQ VKRUW LQ UHDO WHUPV D Ă€ JXUH Dale describes as “not extremeâ€?.

Dale admits he has been preparing the University for public sector

cuts ever since he took up the role in June 2008 and has outlined how he plans to make up for the shortfall in HEFCE funding. “We’ve set three strands of things that we’re going to do,â€? he said. “Firstly, we’re going to attempt to grow non-regulated income because clearly it’s much better for everybody if we can grow our income out of this problem rather than cut back on things. “The second plan is to make nonpay costs like electricity, travel costs, UHSDLUV DQG PDLQWHQDQFH DV HIĂ€ FLHQW as we possibly can. The University currently spends ÂŁ10 million a year on gas and electricity so a saving KHUH FDQ Ă€ OO WKH JDS TXLWH ZHOO “Thirdly, we need to look at where we can improve our processes.

Continued on page 7

Sport Editors Tom James and Paul Christian describe their trip to see Man Utd at the San Siro Sport, page 38

Down and out 8QGHU VWUHQJWK QHWEDOO Âż UVWV IDOO DW the hands of formidable Brunel Sport, page 43

Life & Style, page 14-15

2

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Scientists make breakthrough in ageing research

The Union Society, King’s Walk, Newcastle upon Tyne, NE1 8QB. Tel: 0191 239 3940

Comment Lusty celebs Tiger Woods, John Terry, Ashley Cole and now Vernon Kay. Why do celebrities think they can get away with being unfaithful?

Page 10

News Editors: Simon Murphy and Jessica Tully - courier.news@ncl.ac.uk

> Page 4

Medic honoured with ‘Year of 53 Award’ A.WILSON

Life & Style Fairtrade fashion A look at the growing demand for environmentally friendly clothing Page 16-17

Culture Love or loathe Charlie Brooker: The great debate Page 21

Sport Late Durham down Royals Two late penalties saw local rivals Durham defeat Newcastle’s PHQœV UXJE\ ¿ UVW WHDP DKHDG RI their crunch game at Gateshead Stadium this Sunday Page 44

Meetings Timetable: Monday Sport - 11am, Committee Room A News - 12pm, Committee Room C Comment - 12pm, Committee Room C Photos - 2pm, Committee Room B Tuesday Life & Style - 12pm, Committee Room A Wednesday Film - 12pm, Committee Room A Music - 1pm, Committee Room B Thursday Arts - 12pm, Committee Room A Editorial Team: ‡ (GLWRU 'DYLG &RYHUGDOH ‡ 'HSXW\ (GLWRU )UDQ ,QIDQWH ‡ 1HZV (GLWRUV -HVVLFD 7XOO\ DQG 6LPRQ Murphy ‡ &RPPHQW (GLWRUV &DUROLQH $UJ\URSXOR Palmer and Nicholas Fidler ‡ /LIH 6W\OH (GLWRUV /DULVD %URZQ $OH[ Felton and Ashley Fryer ‡ &XOWXUH (GLWRU $OLFH 9LQFHQW ‡ $UWV (GLWRU 6WHSKDQLH )HUUDR ‡ )LOP (GLWRU )UDQFHV .URRQ ‡ 0XVLF (GLWRUV 0DUN &RUFRUDQ /HWWLFH DQG Chris Mandle ‡ 79 5DGLR (GLWRU $LPHH 3KLOLSVRQ ‡ 3X]]OHV (GLWRUV 6X]L 0RRUH DQG 1HG Walker ‡ 6SRUWV (GLWRUV 3DXO &KULVWLDQ -DPLH *DYLQ DQG 7RP -DPHV ‡ 'HVLJQ (GLWRU 9LFWRULD %HOO ‡ 2QOLQH (GLWRUV *RUGRQ %UXFH -HVVLFD Monson and Laura Walker ‡ 3URRI (GLWRUV 5XWK $OVDQFDN &ODLUH Childs, Kath Harmer, Lucy Houlden, Anna Kenolty, Charlotte Loftus, Emma Peasgood and Claire Russell

The Courier is printed by: Harmsworth Printing Limited, Northcliffe House, Meadow Road, Derby, DE1 2DW. Tel: 01332 253013.

Established in 1948, The Courier is the fully independent Student Newspaper of the Union Society at the University of Newcastle-UponTyne. The Courier is published weekly during term time, and is free of charge.

The design, text, photographs and graphics are copyright of The Courier and its individual contributors. No parts of this newspaper may be reproduced without the prior permission of the Editor. Any views expressed in this newspaper’s opinion pieces are those of the individual writing, and not of The Courier, the Union Society or the University of Newcastleupon-Tyne.

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James Brown $ 1HZFDVWOH Ă€ QDO \HDU PHGLF KDV been honoured with the ‘Year of 53 Award’ by her predecessors from the class of 1953 for her outstanding work “building camaraderieâ€? amongst her 350 classmates by organising social events and netball Ă€ [WXUHV WKURXJK WKH \HDU Claire Medley was awarded the DQQXDO SUL]H ZRUWK Â… E\ IRUPHU VWXGHQWV 'U *HRIIUH\ 0DUVK 0%( and Dr Mary Danskin at a ceremony ODVW :HGQHVGD\ LQ WKH .LQJ *HRUJH 9, %XLOGLQJ Claire proved a worthy winner amongst the seven nominees – voted for by their classmates – for her ability to “join the dots in a year group of over 350 studentsâ€?. ,Q WKH Ă€ IWK \HDU PHGLFDO VWXGHQWV

are based all over the North East and Cumbria in hospitals and practices; despite working in disparate clinical base units at Carlisle and 7HHVVLGH LQ À IWK \HDU &ODLUH ZDV UH sponsible for a memorable battle of the sexes: a girls versus boys netball tournament.

Dr Marsh, who heads the judging panel to choose the winner from the nominees, commented: “Each year we are greatly impressed by the characters we meet and are pleased to be able to offer this award to current medical students after we had such a wonderful experience studying medicine in Newcastle. “Although the medical degree has FKDQJHG JUHDWO\ VLQFH P\ WLPH ,¡P still pleased to say that the students are passionate about their studies and their social lives which is an

essential part of the MB BS experience.�

Claire’s Year of 53 Award is funded by 26 members of the class of 1953. ,W ZDV VHW XS E\ 'U 0DUVK LQ DV DQ DZDUG IRU WKH Ă€ QDO \HDU PHGLFDO student who, regardless of academic achievement, did something to promote “camaraderie, medico-political or sporting activitiesâ€? amongst Medical School students.

'HYHORSPHQW RIĂ€ FHU LQ WKH $OXPQL 2IĂ€ FH -DPHV -RKQVWRQ VDLG RI WKH DZDUG ´2Q EHKDOI RI WKH 0HGLFDO School, we would like to say a huge thanks to the Year of 1953 for their generous donations which will ensure that the Year of 53 award runs IRU DQRWKHU Ă€ YH \HDUV “Their canny ability to capture what a great time they had studying medicine and link it to the ex-

periences of students today is what makes us very honoured to be associated with the award every year.�

This year the award is part of a wider fundraising effort to mark the 175th anniversary of Medicine at Newcastle.

The Medical School, which provided the origins of university study in Newcastle as part of Durham University as far back as 1834, is marking its anniversary this academic year in part by raising funds from its numerous alumni.

The money collected for the larger 1834 Fund will fund exceptional medical students to complete, amongst other things, intercalated MRes and PhD research years in cutting-edge research areas, in order to keep Newcastle at the global forefront of biomedical research.

Mandelson calls for two-year university degrees Claire Childs Lord Mandelson has told vice-chancellors that universities should implement two-year degree courses.

Speaking at a conference on higher education at the University of Nottingham, Lord Mandelson said that two-year degree courses would help solve universities’ current funding problems. ,W LV WKRXJKW WKDW VKRUWHU FRXUVHV would reduce the cost of student support and require universities to think more economically with regard to resources.

Although this may ease the burden on universities, critics of the plan say it is not completely clear how two-year degrees would benHĂ€ W VWXGHQWV 7KH VKRUWHU GHJUHH

programmes are said to be equivalent to three-year degrees in terms of content, meaning that students would have a much more rigorous course.

Holidays would be reduced to only one week at Christmas and Easter, and two weeks in the summer. Students who would usually earn money working over the threemonth summer break would therefore struggle to fund their time at university.

The reduction in holidays would also affect university academics who often conduct research during the summer months.

A spokesperson for Universities UK, which represents university vice-chancellors, told The Times ´,I the outcomes are to be comparable

with the two-year degree, if actually completed within two calendar years, it will be an extremely highSUHVVXUH TXDOLÀ FDWLRQ WKDW ZRXOG only be suitable for very particular kinds of student.�

Second year English Language student Nicola Baird agreed, telling The Courier: “The workload for degrees is pretty heavy even spread over three years. ´3HUVRQDOO\ , GR QRW WKLQN WKDW LW ZRXOG EH SRVVLEOH WR Ă€ W HYHU\WKLQJ into two years - much valuable learning and experience would be lost.â€?

She added: “The Christmas, Easter and summer breaks we have now generally aren’t much of a break with all of the work and revision needed to be done to catch up.�

Concerns about the quality of a two-year course were quashed by Lord Mandelson, who maintained that two-year and three-year degrees would be equally regarded.

He told The Times: “When their objectives and outcomes are clearly GHĂ€ QHG DQG ZKHQ WKH\ DUH WDXJKW well and properly resourced, there is no sense at all in which these alternatives should be seen as inferior to three-year equivalents.â€?

However, there have been questions raised as to whether two-year degrees would be recognised in other countries.

Britain has signed the Bologna Declaration, which states that degrees have to be at least three years long for students to be able to study a postgraduate course abroad.

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

3

News

Shoppers at the ready as new extension of Eldon Square opens to mass crowds Crowds and FDW¿JKWV DOO in a day’s VKRSSLQJ Ashley Fryer Commentary

Ready for business: the unveiling of the new extension of Eldon Square, which showcases over 25 new shops, saw hoards of Newcastle shoppers splashing their cash last week

Fran Infante Deputy Editor Last week saw the unveiling of the new extension to Eldon Square, bringing with it 25 new shops that are set to regenerate Newcastle’s shopping experience.

It is also hoped that the new development will help the city centre to compete once again with its bigger cousin, the MetroCentre in Gateshead.

The renovation, named St An-

drew’s Way, cost £1.8 million to EXLOG DQG WRRN ÀYH \HDUV WR FRPplete, making Eldon Square one of the largest and most state-of-the-art shopping centres in the country.

It is already fully let and over the coming months will house new stores such as Hollister, Waitrose, Superdry and Apple.

Other new shops opening include Tesco Metro and Paperchase, bringing the total number to 130. The complex as a whole is expected to

welcome around 30 million visitors over the next year.

The development is just the latest phase of improvement in the area surrounding Eldon Square, which has already seen a total overhaul of the central bus station in 2007. A further ÂŁ2 million is to be spent refurbishing the existing centre.

Anchoring St Andrew’s Way is the four-storey Debenhams, which is 1HZFDVWOH¡V ÀUVW QHZ GHSDUWPHQW store in over a generation. Deben-

hams formerly had its Newcastle base in the MetroCentre.

Fourth year Engineering student Michael Savage who is also a Personal Sales Advisor at the Branch told The Courier: “The new store is absolutely amazing; it’s so massive and clean, it’s actually exciting to go to work now. “It’s a lot less hassle than going to the MetroCentre; this one will GHĂ€QLWHO\ EH PRUH SRSXODU ZLWK VWXdents.â€?

/DVW 7XHVGD\ WKH à RRGJDWHV ZHUH RSHQHG IRU WKH XQYHLOLQJ RI WKH new branch of Eldon Square, St $QGUHZ¡V :D\ %RDVWLQJ DQ $SSOH VKRS D ELJ 'HEHQKDPV DQG D 7RSshop I could happily move into, the addition makes Eldon Square WKH ELJJHVW FLW\ FHQWUH VKRSSLQJ mall in the UK. I knew I came to uni here for a reason.

7KH XQYHLOLQJ FHUHPRQ\ ZDV extremely busy – I haven’t seen FURZGV DQG FDWÀJKWV OLNH WKDW VLQFH WKH %R[LQJ 'D\ VDOHV :LWK EUDQG new branches of Hollister, Superdry and Paperchase, shoppers ZHUH SXVKLQJ DQG VKRYLQJ WKHLU ZD\ WKURXJK WKH GHQVH FURZGV WR JHW WR WKHLU IDYRXULWH VKRSV 7KH VLQJOH ELJJHVW GUDZ KRZHYer, was the new Apple shop, with a queue that went all the way back to Millie’s Cookies. And even when the rest of the shops were ÀOOLQJ XS $SSOH KDG D GUDPDWLF countdown with balloons and free T-shirts and thousands of people FKDQWLQJ Acrobats and stilt walkers entertained the kids, while over-excited WHHQDJHUV JXVKHG WR PH WKDW WKH\ KDG EHHQ TXHXLQJ VLQFH WKH HDUO\ PRUQLQJ VR DV WR EH WKH ÀUVW WR PDNH LW LQWR 7RSVKRS 6WUROOLQJ down at 10.30am now seems to have been a naïve plan - I only PDGH LW WR 3DSHUFKDVH EHIRUH JLYLQJ XS DQG SURPLVLQJ WR UHWXUQ next week. ,W VHHPV VWUDQJH WR RSHQ D … PLOOLRQ PDOO H[WHQVLRQ GXULQJ the current economic climate, but MXGJLQJ E\ WKH WKRXVDQGV RI SHRSOH DW LWV RSHQLQJ , GRQ¡W UHFNRQ the shops will do too badly.

*HRUGLH %LJ %URWKHU QDUUDWRU YRWHG YRLFH RI WKH GHFDGH Charlie Oven A recent poll has voted Big Brother narrator, Marcus Bentley, the voice WKDW GHĂ€QHG WKH GHFDGH 7KH VXUvey of 5000 people was conducted

by Ultra Chloraseptic Anaesthetic Throat Sprays.

Gateshead-born Marcus Bentley triumphed ahead of Simon Greenall, the voice behind Aleksandr the Meerkat. The outcome of the poll FDQ EH VHHQ WR UHĂ HFW WKH OHYHOV LQ which Big Brother has dominated television over the last ten years.

Love or hate Big Brother, few would fail to recognise the Geordie commentary that has accompanied the television programme during the last decade.

Commenting on the poll, vocal expert Sally Hague said: “Marcus Bentley has an attacking voice, with quite an edge to the vocal quality, but it’s his accent that people tend WR Ă€QG HDUWK\ DQG DWWUDFWLYH Âľ It’s the distinct nature of the North East accent which is familiar to many Newcastle students. Local website englandsnortheast.co.uk claims: “The only part of England where the original Anglo Saxon language has survived to any great extent is of course the North East.â€?

You could say that there is a warrior-like element to Bentley’s voice that commands authority. Like an omnipresent force, it would take a brave person to challenge him on what time and day it was in the Big

Brother house.

Bentley’s rise to vocal ‘icon’ originates from humble beginnings. The long-standing narrator of the show was apparently appointed because producers liked the way he said ‘chickens’. Who was to know that one word would propel him to the vocal heights that he enjoys today?

Few may enjoy the privilege of hearing his recorded voice on an answer machine, or perhaps even know him on a one to one level; for the remainder of us we can only wonder. This only seeks to heighten the mystique around Bentley, where we know him by the voice rather than the person.

It is clear that over time the Geordie narrator has become an integral

7KH WRS ¿YH YRLFHV WKDW KDYH GH¿QHG D GHFDGH %LJ %URWKHU ¹ 0DUFXV %HQWOH\ $OHNVDQGU WKH 0HHUNDW ¹ 6LPRQ *UHHQDOO ; )DFWRU ¹ 3HWHU 'LFNVRQ 0 6 ³7KLV LV QR RUGLQDU\´ ¹ 'HUYOD .LUZDQ 1DWLRQDO /RWWHU\ ¾YRLFH RI WKH EDOOVœ ¹ $ODQ 'HGLFRDW component of the reality television show. To put it simply, Big Brother would not be the programme we

recognise today without him.

Talking to the courier, Will Laband, a second year Biomedical Sciences student, claimed: “Bentley’s commentary on Big Brother seemed unique and otherworldly and so was a fond memory of my childhood.�

What future awaits this vocal colossal? Surely as vocal icon of the decade an array of opportunities exist?

3HUKDSV DQ HSLF ÀOP FKDUWLQJ KLV rise is in the mix, which he surely must narrate. If anything, it is refreshing to see one famed for their voice rather than their image. With this in mind, Bentley can arguably enjoy the recognition of fame whilst maintaining a certain sense of personal anonymity.

4

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

News

University scientists solve the mystery of ageing process Joshua Shrimpton Dean An international team of scientists and students based at Newcastle University are one step closer to unlocking the secret of one of life’s most elusive desires; delaying the ageing process.

The groundbreaking research, led

by Professor Thomas von Zglinicki of Newcastle University’s Institute of Ageing and Health (IAH), has established vital links in the behaviour of biological cells and molecules for WKH ÀUVW WLPH Doctors treating diseases particularly associated with the elderly, including heart disease and canFHU ZLOO HPEUDFH WKH QHZ ÀQGLQJV alongside those seeking to lessen the visual effects of ageing.

Zglinicki’s work centres on cell senescence. The process, which takes place when cells lose the ability to divide, leads to wrinkled skin as the cell begins to deteriorate. More serious complications in humans often include diabetes and heart failure.

Zglinicki told The Courier: “For many years scientists around the world have struggled to understand the complex factors that cause cells to stop dividing as they get older.�

But now, using a revolutionary new research method, the Newcastle scientists have a much clearer insight into what causes the inevitable fate of ageing.

The understanding is that a damaged cell’s mitochondria (or ‘power plant’) detects damaged DNA and then receives instructions from the brain for the cell to either stop multiplying or self-destruct.

This is one of the body’s anti-can-

cer mechanisms in action.

The role of telomeres, protective caps found on the tips of human chromosomes which gradually shorten over time, are also central to the research. “Telomeres and mitochondria are known as probably the most important players in ageing. Our paper VKRZV IRU WKH Ă€UVW WLPH LQ GHWDLO how these two act in combination to induce and maintain senescence of cells. “This makes our understanding of the ageing process more complex and, thus, more real,â€? said Zglinicki.

Professor Tom Kirkwood of the IAH told The Courier how the Institute’s scientists have achieved their results by employing a pioneering research technique involving a combination of computer modelling and experiments with genetically modiĂ€HG PLFH “We have done this in the only way such an advance can be made, which is by using the intensely interdisciplinary approach of systems biology. “Our Institute leads the world in applying systems biology to the cellular study of ageing and this result goes to show how vital it will be that others follow this lead.â€?

Although there are no doubts that the research indicates vital progress in prolonging life expectancy, it is GLIĂ€FXOW WR DYRLG TXHVWLRQV DERXW how society would cope with an increasing elderly population.

Philipp Heinrich, an MA student studying CCC and International Relations told The Courier: “You’ve got a case of having fewer workers in

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society; you’ve got loads of economists already saying we’ve got too many grey people and not enough workers. “Society should be rich enough to support everyone, but the economy LV QRW ZRUNLQJ IRU WKH EHQHĂ€W RI WKH SHRSOH EXW IRU SURĂ€W “I wouldn’t like to live to be 140; I’m not sure how to imagine that long a life. You’ve got all these care homes where the elderly basically wither away. I wouldn’t like to have many more people living that kind of life. “I would like people to have a longer more active life, that’s the most important thing.â€?

Professor Kirkwood expressed the IAH’s awareness of the problems associated with an ageing population.

He told The Courier: “The fact that life expectancy is continuing to increase is going to have a massive impact on societies all around the world. “In developed countries, life exSHFWDQF\ LV LQFUHDVLQJ E\ Ă€YH RU more hours each day. Of course it’s a great thing, though there are many

resulting challenges. “We have to do leading edge research in areas that are some of the PRVW H[FLWLQJ DQG GLIĂ€FXOW LQ ELRmedicine. Second, we also have to provide an example of leadership in an area where most institutions have not yet grappled with the scale of what needs to be done. The IAH does truly operate at the international forefront of research in this area.â€? :LWK LWV URRWV EDVHG Ă€UPO\ LQ P\WK and fairytale, the concept of living forever has been fantasised about from one generation to the next.

Zglinicki said: “I am pretty sure there is no elixir of eternal life.

However, there are ways to prolong lifespan. “I am convinced that our data shows ways to limit the spreading of senescent cells in tissues, which hopefully will delay ageing. My own bet on this is that I will spend the QH[W Ă€YH RU VL[ \HDUV WR VHH ZKHWKHU this might be possible.â€?

Professor Zglinicki went on to discuss the attraction of Newcastle University’s world-renowned re-

search reputation that brought him to the North East.

He told The Courier: “Newcastle University Medical Faculty was RQH RI WKH Ă€UVW SODFHV LQ WKH ZRUOG to make ageing a major research focus.â€?

Second year Media, Communication & Cultural Studies student, Oscar Villarreal, told The Courier: “It’s fantastic that Newcastle University has been able to lead the way in new medical science discoveries and provide a valuable input to the sciHQWLĂ€F ZRUOG “Hopefully in the future our aging won’t be as problematic as it has been in the past, and perhaps we won’t have to worry so much about getting old.â€?

Frederik Blauwhof, studying an MA in International Politics, told The Courier that the prominence of the latest research brings obvious advantages to the university’s reputation.

He said: “If you think about living a longer life, it’s kind of the ultimate wish, or probably one of the ultimate wishes that everybody has.�

Students’ ‘Queen Bee Candles’ wins Young Enterprise Award Bethany Sissons A group of Newcastle University business students have won two awards for their young enterprise company Queen Bee Candles.

Second year business students .DWH *ULIĂ€WKV +DUULHW 6RXWKDOO Anelise Siddle, Juliet Facey and Samantha Kerrison are the faces of the company.

Queen Bee Candles is an environmentally aware candle-making business, creating 100% homemade, pure beeswax candles. The company was born out of the students’ business enterprise module last October but has gone from strength to strength over recent months.

As well as providing eco-friendly candles, Queen Bee Candles also raises money for the ‘Save the Honey Bee Campaign’.

50 per cent of the company’s profits go towards this cause, which investigates why bees are dying out.

Honey bees are now an endangered species and a proportion of

SURĂ€WV UDLVHG E\ WKH 1HZFDVWOH VWXdents will be invested in research to preserve the honey bees.

The team spent weeks making the candles in their student house kitchens before launching their natural products at local farmers markets and selected local retailers.

Now the Newcastle University students’ impressive business idea has been celebrated by the local business community.

The students won the best graduate programme at the annual Young Enterprise North East (YENE) Trade Fair which took place at the Metro Centre.

44 student companies competed and the students were judged on their business models during the trade fair.

The Young Enterprise programme enables students to develop a business and sell innovative products/ services to the public whilst learning how to run a successful business.

The students’ companies were judged by members of the local

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business community including Angela Craggs (ONE North East’s Enterprise specialist adviser), Kristina Henry (Home Group) and Peter Wagstaff (Coutts Banking).

Catherine Marchant, Chief Executive of Young Enterprise North East described the students at the Young Enterprise Trade Fair as having enormous “entrepreneurial spirit�.

She praised the students and added: “It was a real achievement for them to make it to the Trade Fair to learn about selling in the real trading world.�

The directors of Queen Bee Candles also took 1st place in the IBM pitching contest. Challenged to present a two minute pitch on their business idea, Queen Bee Candles won ÂŁ80 to invest in their business. .DWH *ULIĂ€WKV 'LUHFWRU RI 2SHUDtions for Queen Bee Candles, expressed how happy she was to be a part of the winning business team.

After receiving the two awards, she told The Courier: “We’ve been working really hard so it was satis-

fying to see it pay off. “As a team this is a cause we are all passionate about so it’s great to be doing well. The more candles we sell, the more money we can donate to this campaign.�

Furthermore, Queen Bee Candles are now working with SIFE (Students in Free Enterprise) and Gateshead council, using student enterprise to promote community projects. As a result, Queen Bee Candles hopes to run candle workshops. .DWH *ULIĂ€WKV GHVFULEHG 4XHHQ %HH Candles’ experience of the business enterprise project as “brilliantâ€?.

She told The Courier: â&#x20AC;&#x153;It has been challenging but weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve had so much fun. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We want to say thank you to everyone who has purchased a candle and also to our housemates for putting up with us; our entire kitchens are covered in beeswax!â&#x20AC;? <RX FDQ Ă&#x20AC;QG 4XHHQ %HH &DQGOHV on Facebook and discover which farmersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; markets they will be attending.

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

5

News

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6

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

News Law student jailed for stabbing in botched drug deal Mary-Beth Frater A Law student who stabbed a man during a drug deal gone wrong has been sentenced to 10 years imprisonment for Grievous Bodily Harm.

Alvin Osinde, 21, was cleared of attempted murder but was convicted of lesser charge GBH with intent.

On May 14 of last year, victim Daniel Mandalia, 20, had arranged with the defendant to purchase some can-

nabis on a street corner in Sutton.

Once in the back of the defendant’s car, he realised he’d been set up to be robbed, at which point Osinde punched him repeatedly and stabbed him in the back.

0DQ FKDUJHG DIWHU /HHGV VWXGHQW GUHVVHG DV VKHHS VHW RQ ÀUH A court heard last week how a man VHW ÀUH WR D VWXGHQW GUHVVHG XS DV D sheep in a Leeds pub.

The victim aged 19, spent almost a month in hospital after a fancy dress night turned sour when his costume was allegedly set alight at Heading-

ly Taps pub in October.

Jason Whatley, 38, appeared before magistrates in Leeds charged with arson reckless as to whether life was endangered.

Magistrates were told Wheatley also faces assault charges in connec-

tion with the two other victims who had been wearing similar costumes ZKLFK FDXJKW ÀUH ZKHQ WKH ÁDPHV spread.

Wheatley was bailed to appear at Leeds Crown Court this week.

New documentary claims internet is ‘re-wiring’ student brains A new documentary to be aired on BBC 2 is set to claim that British students are incapable of concentrating on reading an academic book for study because use of the internet has “re-wired” their brains.

Experts from The Virtual Revo-

lution will allege that the internet encourages users to dart between pages rather than concentrate on a single source like a book.

This is said to leave the majority incapable of reading or writing at length as their minds have been re-

moulded to function differently.

Psychologists warn that within three years, hundreds of thousands of teenagers will need medicine or hospital treatment for subsequent mental illness.

Graduate accidentally hanged himself seeking adrenalin rush Extreme sports enthusiast Calum Chattwood, 22, died while seeking an adrenalin rush at the home he shared with his parents, an inquest

heard.

The hearing was told how University graduate Calum, who had taken part in sky dives and bungee jumps,

had researched how to perform the act, said to cause an adrenalin rush, on the internet. He was found dead at the house on October 28.

University launches new scheme to tackle cybercrime Chris Mandle Newcastle University has taken an innovative approach to tackling cybercrime by getting children to teach their grandparents how to use an Xbox.

Responding to an alarming increase in cyber bullying and online grooming, the University has set up the scheme at St Peter’s RC School in Gateshead, where 30 children are being given the opportunity to challenge their grandparents online. In doing so, it is hoped that the children will be able to demonstrate their technical know-how, while grandparents become more aware of online gaming.

The initiative is being led by Phil Butler, a former DCI with Northumbrian Police who now works with Newcastle University’s Centre for Cybercrime and Computer Security.

The ‘Safe Internet Day’ will also offer practical advice on how to keep children safe, what to look for and potential risks present on the internet.

“This is about bridging the generation gap and giving grandparents an insight into their grandchildren’s world,” explained Mr Butler.

“Love it or hate it, the internet is a massive part of our children’s lives so we need to make sure they

FDQ HQMR\ WKH EHQHÀWV LW KDV WR RIIHU without being put at risk.

“Grandparents are often the prime carers but many have little understanding about online gaming and chat rooms and the potential threats they pose.

“Our aim is to get the children teaching the grandparents. We want to raise awareness of the dangers of unsupervised use but also empower the adults so they can help the children to use the internet safely.”

The program is being launched under the Hadrian Project. The project brings together experts from Newcastle University, the North East Fraud Forum, local and national government, North East businesses and lawyers to tackle a wide range of issues relating to internet safety and security.

Game on: children teach grandparents how to use an Xbox in new scheme

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

7

News

6WXGHQWV VFRRS Ă&#x20AC;UVW SUL]H LQ DUFKLWHFWXUDO FRPSHWLWLRQ Danya Bazaraa Stage three BA Architectural Studies students Adam Brookbanks, Jonty Marsh and Natalie Ellis have been DZDUGHG Ă&#x20AC;UVW SUL]H IRU WKH 1RUWK East Coast Timber Trade Associationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Structural Timber Awardâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, 2009.

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that allows visitors a diverse culturDO H[SHULHQFH Entries were due back in NovemEHU VR VWXGHQWV KDYH ZDLWHG SDtiently since then to hear the results. $IWHU KDYLQJ WKUHH ZHHNV WR FRPSOHWH WKH SURMHFW LQ VWXGHQWV KDG WR SUHVHQW WKHLU RULJLQDO GHVLJQV WR WKHLU WXWRUV EXW DOVR WR WKHLU IHOORZ course mates. The tutors marked the SURMHFWV WKHQ VHQW WKH KLJKHVW TXDOity designs to TRADA, who marked WKHVH LQGHSHQGHQWO\ EHIRUH VHOHFWLQJ D Ă&#x20AC;QDO ZLQQHU An award ceremony was held in the Old Assembly Rooms. It was an annual NETTA dinner with associDWHV IURP WKH FRPSDQ\ SUHVHQW 1DWDOLH (OOLV DWWHQGHG WKLV SUHVHQWDWLRQ DV D UHSUHVHQWDWLYH RI WKH ZLQQLQJ team.

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Adventurer: ex-Newcastle student Ed Laughton is set to climb Mount Everest

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He said: â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Vice-Chancellorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s JUHDW SKUDVH RQ WKLV LV WKDW Âś\RX OHDUQ PRUH IURP SHRSOH WKDW \RX GRQ¡W NQRZ WKDQ IURP SHRSOH WKDW you do knowâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. ´:H EHOLHYH WKDW IURP PHHWLQJ LQternational students there is good RSSRUWXQLW\ IRU KRPH VWXGHQWV WR learn more about diverse cultures. ´%XW WKH\ REYLRXVO\ DOVR KHOS WR give some income that enable us to SURWHFW WKH VWXGHQW H[SHULHQFH IRU everybody. ´,W¡V JRRG IRU WKH 8QLYHUVLW\¡V economy because its unregulated LQFRPH EXW WKH\¡OO RQO\ SD\ ZKDW WKH PDUNHW ZLOO EDUH Âľ Newcastle University currently charges international students beWZHHQ Â&#x2026; D Ă&#x20AC;JXUH FRPSDUDEOH WR ULYDO LQVWLWXWLRQV LQ WKH 8.

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'DOH H[SHFWV 1HZFDVWOH WR WDNH RQ DURXQG QHZ XQGHUJUDGXDWHV but says that they are under very VWULFW LQVWUXFWLRQ IURP WKH JRYHUQment not to recruit any more stuGHQWV WKDQ WKH\ GLG LQ RU WKH\ ZLOO IDFH D Ă&#x20AC;QH RI Â&#x2026; SHU VWXGHQW that is brought in higher than that amount.

7KLV KDV FDXVHG PDMRU FRQFHUQ IRU other universities, with Dale saying LW LV FOHDU WKDW ´WKH JURZWK PRGHO IRU XQLYHUVLWLHV LV GHDGÂľ +H DGGHG ´,V LW PHOWGRZQ IRU some universities? Yes, I think it is. â&#x20AC;&#x153;There are some universities like Cornwall, Worcester and Cumbria, who have taken out large bank loans IRU ELJ GHYHORSPHQWV DQG WKDW ZDV JRLQJ WR EH IXQGHG E\ JURZWK LQ student numbers through the years.

Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s clear now is that thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not JRLQJ WR KDSSHQ ´7KH\¡YH JRW UHDO SUREOHPV DQG will have to make great cuts in their H[SHQGLWXUH Âľ 7KH FRQWURYHUVLDO VXEMHFW RI UDLVLQJ WKH FDS RQ WXLWLRQ IHHV KDV DJDLQ FRPH WR SXEOLF DWWHQWLRQ LQ WKH ZDNH RI WKH +()&( DQQRXQFHPHQW ZLWK 3ROLF\ ([FKDQJH DQ LQGHSHQGHQW education charity, last week calling IRU WKH FDS WR EH UDLVHG WR Â&#x2026; $ JRYHUQPHQW UHYLHZ RI WXLWLRQ IHHV OHG E\ /RUG %URZQH LV FXUUHQWly ongoing and Dale believes they KDYH JRW DQ ´LPSRVVLEOHÂľ GHFLVLRQ to make. ´0\ SHUVRQDO YLHZ LV WKDW ZH GRQ¡W ZDQW WR SXW VWXGHQW IHHV XS MXVW WR gain extra income, as I think there ZRXOG EH DQ LVVXH RI ORZ LQFRPH students not being able to come to

university. â&#x20AC;&#x153;In the current environment, Â&#x2026; LV DERXW ULJKW EXW WKDW¡V EDVHG RQ JHWWLQJ +()&( EORFN JUDQWV RI Â&#x2026; PLOOLRQ D \HDU ,I \RX ZHUH WR come back to me and it had gone GRZQ WR Â&#x2026; PLOOLRQ D \HDU , PLJKW KDYH D VRPHZKDW GLIIHUHQW RSLQLRQ â&#x20AC;&#x153;Is it meltdown for some universities?

Yes, I think it isâ&#x20AC;?

Richard Dale, University Executive Director of Finance

´,I +()&( IXQGLQJ LV JRLQJ WR FRPH GRZQ DQG LI ZH ZDQW WR PDLQWDLQ WKH VWXGHQW H[SHULHQFH WKH IHH ZRXOG KDYH WR JR XS WR EDODQFH WKH HTXDWLRQ Âľ The Universityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s income this year LV H[SHFWHG WR WRWDO Â&#x2026; P PDGH XS RI DPRQJVW RWKHU WKLQJV IXQGLQJ JUDQWV DFDGHPLF IHHV DQG UHVHDUFK grants. ,Q WHUPV RI Ă&#x20AC;QDQFH 1HZFDVWOH VLWV PLG WDEOH ZLWKLQ WKH 5XVVHOO *URXS D JUHDW LPSURYHPHQW IURP Ă&#x20AC;YH \HDUV DJR ZKHUH DV 'DOH SXWV LW 1HZFDVWOH VDW ´DW WKH UHOHJDWLRQ HQG RI WKH WDEOHÂľ Schools and services havenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t been without their troubles however, with WKH 5RELQVRQ /LEUDU\ LQ SDUWLFXODU being badly hit by the devaluation RI WKH SRXQG PHDQLQJ DQ LQFUHDVH LQ WKH FRVW RI RYHUVHDV MRXUQDOV 'DOH LV WKHUHIRUH XQGHUVWDQGDEO\ FDXWLRXV DV KH ORRNV WR WKH IXWXUH He said: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not going to be FRPSODFHQW WKHUH DUH JRLQJ WR EH D ORW RI FKDOOHQJHV DKHDG DQG ZH UHFRJQLVH WKDW VRPH RI RXU FROOHDJXH universities have got real challenges. ´0\ PHVVDJH LV DOZD\V ÂśGRQ¡W SDQicâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; but there needs to be measured urgency. ´,I ZH GRQ¡W KDYH WKDW PHDVXUHG urgency then in a yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s time we PD\ ZHOO KDYH WR SDQLF DQG WKDW¡V EHHQ P\ PHVVDJH IRU WKH ODVW \HDU DQG D KDOI Âľ

8

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

News

Shortage of farm vets poses health risk Rosie Libell New research conducted by Philip Lowe, founder of the Centre for Rural Economy at Newcastle University, has revealed that vets spend sigQLĂ&#x20AC; FDQWO\ PRUH WLPH ZLWK SHWV WKDQ they do with farm animals.

Loweâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s research shows that between 1998 and 2006, the proportion of time vets in private practice spent on treating animals for consumption halved.

The level of pay received for treating pets is far superior to that for treating farm animals and clients are much more willing and able than farmers to pay for such services and treatments.

A journalist working for The Guardian recently admitted to spending over ÂŁ2000 on treatment for a guinea pig.

Most vets run their own businesses, encouraging more time to be spent with pets rather than farm animals.

Lowe also points out that the debt for new veterinary graduates has increased, which makes working with pets a far more attractive option.

This trend, Lowe believes, could lead to a problem with the safety of food, as there are potentially not enough vets spending time with farm animals and preventing aniPDO GLVHDVHV OLNH VZLQH Ă X 7KLV XO timately creates a threat to human health.

The research reveals that the relationship between the Government

Vacancies www.ncl.ac.uk/careers/vacsonline The Careers Service provides information and advice on developLQJ \RXU VNLOOV Âż QGLQJ D SDUW WLPH MRE work experience, supporting business start-up and (when the time comes) exploring graduate opportunities.

For more details about these and other vacancies, including details of how to apply, visit their website at www.ncl.ac.uk/careers.

Vacancies brought to you by the Careers Service:

and the veterinary profession is weaker because the proportion of the profession it employs directly has shrunk drastically. Within a forty year period, the number of vets employed by the Government to check the safety of meat and farm animals has dropped from 11 per cent to only four per cent.

Lowe told The Courier that this â&#x20AC;&#x153;is UHĂ HFWHG LQ WHDFKLQJ DQG UHVHDUFK which have also moved away from farm animal concerns and food production.â&#x20AC;?

Lowe believes that this puts food safety in the UK at risk and points out that despite this weakening re-

lationship with the Government, we live in an age when there is real and widespread public concern about welfare standards for farm animals, threats from animal diseases old and new, and food safety. /RZH LGHQWLĂ&#x20AC; HV WKDW SDUW RI WKH problem is too many young vets are put off farm practice before they have a chance to develop their skills DQG FRQĂ&#x20AC; GHQFH DQG FDOOV IRU PRUH specialist training and support in this area for the veterinary student and the early-days practitioner. He told The Courier: â&#x20AC;&#x153;the farm vetâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s position and respect for their expertise must be restored.â&#x20AC;?

Job Title: Website Manager Employer: Adventure at Freemans Business: Camping equipment retailer Closing date: 25/02/2010 Salary: ÂŁ6.50 per hour Basic job description: Adventure at Freemans are an outdoor and camping equipment retailer based in the Bigg Market. They are currently looking for a student with knowledge of web design to manage their website on a part time basis. You will be required to work 10 hours per week.

Location: Bigg Market, Newcastle City Centre Job Title: Student Representatives Employer: Frontier Business: Conservation through exploration Closing date: 30/12/2010 Salary: Commission Description: Are you an undergraduate or postgraduate? Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re looking for personable and enthusiastic candidates to represent Frontier at our many events around the world. We need self motivated student reps to help organise venues, create interest and generate awareness of talks and presentations at universities across the globe. You would be co-ordinating term time promotions and liaising with relevant academics at your university.

Location: Newcastle upon Tyne Job Title: Bitesize University Student Representatives Employer: Newcastle University Business: Higher Education Institution Closing date: 12/03/2010 Payment: ÂŁ390 Description: The Student Recruitment team are looking for a team of 44 outstanding undergraduate Student Representatives to work with groups of up to ten 16/17 year olds during the Bitesize Uni residential Summer School organised by Newcastle University. The aim of Bitesize Uni (BSU) is to raise the awareness

and aspirations of local pupils towards Higher Education and to allow WKHP WR Âż QG RXW DERXW WKH DFDGHPLF and social opportunities available as a student.

Person requirements: You will need to be enthusiastic, energetic, hardworking and responsible. You should HQMR\ ZRUNLQJ ZLWK VWXGHQWV RUJDQLV ing and participating in team activities and providing help, support and advice to others. The work is rewarding and fun (and looks great on your CV) but is also extremely demanding and requires you to be residential at Castle Leazes Halls of Residence as part of your supervisory role. You will be working with children under the age of 18 and will be required to undertake an Enhanced Disclosure through a CRB check.

Location: Castle Leazes, Newcastle upon Tyne Job Title: TA Challenge 2010 Employer: The Army Business: Defence Closing date: None given Salary: ÂŁ1000+ tax free and bonuses Description: The National Royal Logistic Corps Territorial Army are recruiting university students to take up the challenge of becoming a trained TA soldier during the summer holidays in July and August this year.

2IÂż FHU OHDGHUVKLS DQG PDQDJHPHQW training or trade training will follow VXEMHFW WR \RXU DYDLODELOLW\ Dates: 1 weekend before July 2010, then 10th July - 23rd July 2010 and 31st July - 13th August 2010. For every day you train you will receive Army pay plus a tax-free bonus at the HQG RI WKH \HDU $OO WKRVH ZKR MRLQ DQG complete the course will earn a total of ÂŁ1416. The training will be held in Grantham, Lincolnshire and all travel and subsistence costs will be met.

Person requirements: Do you have at least 19 days to spare and are you aged between 17-30 years?

Interested in challenge, variety, travel and adventure? Are you a UK, ROI or Commonwealth citizen studying in the UK? Want to become a trained Territorial Army Soldier in the Royal Logistic Corps during the summer holidays? Take the TA Challenge!

Location: Grantham, Lincolnshire

Having problems with your university accommodation?

Rebecca Curtis 6$& ,QIRUPDWLRQ 2IÂż FHU It is a legal requirement that all UK universities have a government approved Codes of Management Practice for their halls of residence, and as such, university residences have very strict standards - including those relating to hygiene, safety, and maintenance - to adhere to.

Newcastle University follows the Universities UK Code of Practice for the management of student housing, and is available to view on the Student Advice Centreâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s website at www.unionsociety.co.uk/sac on the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;University Accommodationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; page.

The codes are important to all of you currently living in university -run halls of residence, as they ensure that your accommodation meets a particular standard.

If you believe that your accommodation does not meet the standards outlined within the code, you can lodge an internal complaint under the UUKâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Codes of Management Practice by reporting a problem to your accommodation reception either in person, via email, letter, or telephone (full details of this can be found on our website).

If this fails to achieve results, or you want some extra support and reassurance, you are always welcome to come and talk to the Student Advice Centre about this or any other issue.

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

9

Vancouver 2010: the show must still go on > Page 10 Comment Editors: Caroline Argyropulo-Palmer and Nicholas Fidler - courier.comment@ncl.ac.uk

World of Warcraft: just a video game or a way of life?

Tarren Smarr

World Of Warcraft, aka WOW, has become a global phenomenon with its virtual simulation and cornucopia of players. Seriously, what is the fascination with this World of Warcraft game that people are on about?

With over 11 million players worldwide, WOW completely dominates the market. However, recent â&#x20AC;&#x153;researchâ&#x20AC;? has shown that this game has a so-called addictive quality. Only a few weeks ago, a teenager collapsed in convulsions after playing WOW for 24 hours. I cannot even begin to tell you how many problems there are with that scenario.

First of all, as a teenager, you should be hanging out with your friends. Your real friends, not hanging out in your house alone with only your online companions to keep you company. And second, why is anyone playing a game for 24 hours. Have you ever heard of sleep? Though some of us have insomnia, sleep, in whatever length it comes in, is a joy to the body.

Letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s be real, when you are spending more time playing games than living your life, it may be safe to say you have an â&#x20AC;&#x153;addictionâ&#x20AC;?, but what is it that you are addicted to?

Though I have never played this game, I can understand the attraction of being able to battle others in the fashion of role-play. It is

funâ&#x20AC;Śbut only for a bit, not for the immense amount of time that some people spend on this game.

Though I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t want to admit it, I actually know people who claim to have fallen in love with a virtual character from this game. News Ă DVK LW LV DQ DYDWDU -XVW OLNH WKH one you created that does not resemble you in any way shape or IRUP WKHLU DYDWDU LV DOVR D Ă&#x20AC; JPHQW of the playerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s imagination.

You may think you have found the girl of your dreams in that virtual world of awesomeness, but you could be wrong. That beauty with long luscious hair, big boobs, DQG D Ă&#x20AC; W ERG\ LV SUREDEO\ DQ RYHU weight slacker like you.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just a game; donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t let it take over your life. What I am about to tell you is a completely true story; a sad story, but true. Back in the US, my mateâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s boyfriend broke up with her. Yeah, we know break ups suck. Do you want to know why?

He told her that he could not give the relationship enough time because it was taking away from him playing WOW. It would be really funny if it werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t true.

In this game, friends become enemies, relationships are severed and lives are ruined! If you are a game player, one day you will wake up and realize that you have wasted your life. After all, you are 40 years old, still living with your parents, and talking about game characters as though they are real people.

Welcome to a life of being permanently single. Put your game controller down and get yourself together. Because letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s face it, you will literally die before your character in the game does, or before there is an actual end to this game.

7DNH 0H 2XW WLPH IRU WKH Ă&#x20AC; QDO QDLO LQ WKH FRIĂ&#x20AC; Q RI FKHDS 79 Nicholas Fidler Comment Editor

At the last count, Facebookâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;No Likey No Lightyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; fan page looked set to breach a membership of 500,000.

That nearly half a million people, many students included, can with a straight face suggest Take Me Out represents quality programming is a travesty.

Shows such as ITV1â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Take Me Out and Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m A Celebrity... or Channel 4â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Big Brother or Deal or No Deal, serve as poignant indicators of what is wrong with society these days.

The ever growing mountain of cheaply made mass-market reality and game show rubbish that characterises mainstream television, is suffocating the cultural expedience of Britain and is symptomatic of a society in cultural, moral and intellectual decline.

Channels across the BBC (less so BBC3) operate a schedule whose content is in diametric opposition

to the large drones of reality/game show trash from their competitors.

Never mind having 800 channels on Sky, all I need is BBC1,2,4, BBC News, More 4 and Film 4.

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not suggesting that every single programme on either ITV1 or Channel 4 is trash because Dispatches, Grand Designs, and the Guinness Premiership are spot on, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the growing proportion of garbage that is to be condemned.

Similarly, nor is everything on the %%& WR EH JORULĂ&#x20AC; HG -RQDWKDQ 5RVV¡V departure is music to my ears.

When people wax indignant about how the TV licence should be disbarred, I ponder; would you really want the entirety of mainstream TV to pander to the wants of your average Briton?

Ten minutes spent in the Bigg Market after a Newcastle United home game would incline me to VXJJHVW D Ă&#x20AC; UP ´QRÂľ The TV license should be retained EHFDXVH WKH %%& SURYLGHV Ă&#x20AC; UVW class, entertaining, intellectually enlightening broadcasting.

University Challenge, Top Gear, Planet Earth, Horizon, Panorama, QI, Have I Got News For You, Ski Sunday, quality news coverage, a miniature arsenal of natural-science and

natural-history documentaries with the Six Nations and Vancouver 2010 to boot.

News, sport, entertainment, documentaries; all present and correct.

I mean, just imagine if ITV gave -HUHP\ 3D[PDQ VRPH FRPSHWLWLRQ â&#x20AC;&#x153;GNVQ Challenge-asking the quesWLRQV -RKQQ\ 9HJDVÂľ -HVXV ZHSW The cheap reality/game shows in question are abhorrent for two main reasons. Firstly, shows such as Big Brother facilitate a mechanical process of automated celebrity creation. And for this, the British public should be ashamed.

Living in a house with strangers for ten weeks (donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t these people have jobs to go to?) under constant surveillance is in no way meritorious and should not be rewarded by quasi-religious reverence from the public or through the endless run of trashy magazines polluting society.

That tabloids like The Sun, which disseminate this celebrity nonsense, have the largest readership in Britain brings me to despair.

-DGH *RRG\¡V DSSHDUDQFH RQ Celebrity Big Brother some years back highlights how this social disaster has come full circle, given she initially shot to fame through Big Brother itself.

When she died, it may as well have been a national holiday.

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m sure that before Big Brother has run its course there will doubtless be another peroxide-blonde girl with silicon breasts and a double digit IQ that the masses will come to adore for no discernible reason.

It is digital heroin for a proletarian culture.

Secondly, these shows, especially the cheap and nasty game show variety, convey and reinforce the view that it is OK to be stupid. It is not OK. ITV1 used to have a shred of self-respect by at least demanding participants on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire? actually answer some questions to earn their prize.

These days all Channel 4 wants you to do is pick one box out of a few dozen in the most convoluted of fashions.

That people can actually stand on national television (again, shouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t you lot be at work?) claiming they have a â&#x20AC;&#x153;strategyâ&#x20AC;? to somehow navigate through an arbitrary game of randomised numbers, and that a TV show like Deal Or No Deal has normalised such a moronic philosophy speaks volumes about the intellectual character of current

Britain.

-XVW DYRLG ZDWFKLQJ WKHP \RX say. Seems simple enough, but the enormity of some of these shows spill over into other facets of life these days.

You canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t buy The Times without being exposed to whatever moral disaster is inhabiting the front cover of The Sun. Nor can you watch a full episode of Grand Designs without been party to the latest reality craze.

So long as society continues to erroneously hold onto the view that it is wrong to condemn the choices of some people and that stupidity should be celebrated, Britain will not pull up from its current freefall.

It is no surprise to me that the wealth gap is widening; that university departments are closing; that illiteracy and innumeracy rates are on the rise; that our once beautifully eloquent language has been cheapened and violated; that Britain has the highest rate of teen pregnancy in the EU, and that the pound is weakening almost daily.

One Saturday night spent watching ITV1 will easily explain why.

10

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Comment

Gold Medals all round: more Olympic gods than Olympic athletes Jack Stevenson

The Winter Olympics â&#x20AC;&#x201C; for hundreds of sportsmen and women it is the pinnacle of their careers, the ultimate competitive event. This year it is being held in Vancouver, Canada, and had been anticipated to be a huge success.

Unfortunately, even before the opening ceremony, tragedy had struck the event with the death of one of the competitors. Nodar Kumaritashvili, just twenty-one, was supposed to compete in the luge event. Unfortunately, the young Georgian athlete did not make it that far and died during a training run.

Luge is not a sport for the faint hearted. It involves one or two athletes lying supine (that is, lying RQ WKHLU EDFN IHHW Ă&#x20AC; UVW RQ D VPDOO unenclosed sled and travelling down an icy track way. The sled is VWHHUHG E\ Ă H[LQJ WKH VOHG¡V UXQ ners, which the rider does using their calf and shoulder muscles.

Speeds in excess of ninety mph can be achieved.

Kumaritashviliâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s terrible accident is not unique; he is the fourth athlete to die in preparing for a winter Olympics luge race. Nicolas Bochatay died at the Albertville Winter Olympics in 1992, whilst the other accidents both occurred

The menâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s moguls: dedicated Winter Olympians face dangerous conditions whilst competing in challenging, awe-inspiring events

at Innsbruck in 1964.

Although questions are still EHLQJ DVNHG LW ZDV FRQĂ&#x20AC; UPHG E\ Canadian Olympic Authorities that Nodar died through his own error whilst travelling at high speed and not due to dangers inherent to the luge course in Vancouver. Yet his family still wonder, with full justi-

Ă&#x20AC; FDWLRQ ZK\ LW ZDV WKDW WKH OHQJWK of the track at these games was shortened, after his death.

7KLV FKDQJH GHĂ&#x20AC; QLWHO\ VORZV down the competitors, but surely speed was taken into consideration when the original track was designed? ,W LV GLIĂ&#x20AC; FXOW WR LPDJLQH ZKDW WKH

family of this sportsman must be going through; they will have supported and encouraged this man throughout his training, and now they have seen him perish doing what he loved.

Every now and then in the sporting world a terrible accident occurs. But these should in no way

go towards discouraging anyone from entering a sport that may seem or actually be dangerous.

Luge clearly is dangerous and requires great skill to be developed over many years; but equally clearly, even Olympians can make mistakes.

Everything that is done involves some sort of risk; high performance sport people push their bodies and minds to the limits to achieve great things, in many cases exposing themselves to extreme risk.

This attitude towards competition and a desire to better oneself against the odds is central not just to sport, but can be applied to almost any other aspect of life; it must be recognised and supported. At the same time, when a sport does get dangerous, the correct procedures to keep athletes safe must always be in place and working properly.

One criticism that the Canadian Authorities did receive was not allowing athletes from overseas as much access to the Luge course as they did their own. Not giving everyone an equal footing in this case, may have cost a man his life.

But Vancouver 2010 continues after the death of this brave athlete and sport continues, with many men and women still striving to do better than those before them, come rain, wind or snow. Sometimes it takes a poignant event like this to occur to appreciate these people, what they represent and why these ideals should be so important to all of us.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s my party and Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be burnt on an open air funeral pyre if I want to Daniel Rawcliffe

Imagine you plan an elaborate party; every detail of the event is up to you. From the dress code to the playlist, from the type of food on offer to the dĂŠcor; you get to organise the entire show.

Want the wine bottles to be dressed up as little giraffes? Done.

Need some live entertainment, possibly in the form of Rihanna; but only if BeyoncĂŠ canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t make

it? Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s booked. Want to ask every guest to come with gifts/donations/food/disposable cameras/ no underwear? Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll do it but there is one condition. You are not allowed to go.

Not because nobody likes you or anything, but because youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re sort of dead. Sorry. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a bit of a shocker, agreed. Butâ&#x20AC;Śthe party is still on right?

Of course the show must go on.

Especially for Davender Kumar Ghai from Gosforth, who recently won his right to be cremated on an open air funeral pyre in accordance with his Hindu beliefs.

Fire is an important part of Hindu funeral rites, it cleans away the body (the tent of the soul) and

releases the spirit (the bit that matters) into the air. :KHQ FUHPDWLRQ ZDV Ă&#x20AC; UVW LQWUR duced to Britain by the imaginatively named Cremation Society in 1874, it was done so to cut the cost (both monetary and environmental) of traditional Judeo-Christian burials. &RIĂ&#x20AC; QV ZHUH FRVWO\ DQG VR ZDV the land within which to bury them. Cremation, that heathen hangover from pagan times, presented a method of funereal farewell which was cheaper, quicker and in some instances prettier. &URZGLQJ DURXQG D ERQĂ&#x20AC; UH HYHU\ November 5 is not only social, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s SUDFWLFDO 1RYHPEHU LV FROG Ă&#x20AC; UH is warm, we are cold so we gather

URXQG WKH Ă&#x20AC; UH <RX PD\ HYHQ JHW D sparkler.

Things are viewed differently ZKHQ WKH *X\ LQ WKH Ă&#x20AC; UH LV DFWXDOO\ Mr. Ghai from Gosforth. The councilâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s efforts to prevent Ghai from leaving this reality in his own style indicate a reluctance to spend.

Whether that be the monetary spending involved in constructing PRGLĂ&#x20AC; HG FUHPDWRULXPV ZLWK RSHQ roofs); or the spending of thought required whenever one takes anotherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s beliefs into account.

Planning a funeral is the same as planning any social event. You simply plan it in the knowledge that you will never receive your invite. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the perfect party; the theme is you.

Whilst some regard this as morbid, it is usually the person whose death is imminent who rejects such a suggestion. Mr Ghai has stated that the High Courtâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s decision to allow him his funeral pyre has â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;breathed life into an old manâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dreamsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;; he has won the right to die according to his own beliefs and this is a cause for celebration, no matter how vast and uncomfortable the concept of death may be to think about.

Mr. Ghai has elected not to accept a death that is dark, cold and enVFRQFHG LQ D FRIĂ&#x20AC; Q EXW RQH ZKLFK illuminates those around him. It is a beautiful, and warm, method of saying goodbye. Sparklers may or may not be included.

We need to think about Afghanistanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s future in the long as well as short term Nile Amos

7KH Ă LUWDWLRQ EHWZHHQ WKH 7DOLEDQ and the rest of the waiting world VHHPHG WR FRPH WR D VLJQLĂ&#x20AC; FDQW climax this week as the news of the top Taliban commander Mullah Abdul Ghani Baradarâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s capture broke the morning headlines on Tuesday.

The words practically rang out of Helmand like the chimes of freedom, even though we are yet to see his face in custody (a

scene predictably rubbished by the Taliban).

This is, of course, just one man.

The Coalition deems his capture VLJQLĂ&#x20AC; FDQW DV KLV UHPRYDO DV FRP mander of insurgent forces will leave the rebels scattered and without formation and leadership.

The circumstances however would suggest that the Taliban are not about to implode from a lack of leader, and they need not ever worry about a malfunction of VDWHOOLWH FRPPXQLFDWLRQV DQG VFL Ă&#x20AC; military technology.

The Taliban are still a guerrilla IRUFH $ Ă&#x20AC; QDQFLDOO\ RUJDQLVHG IRUFH no doubt about that, but one that thrives on the emotional backlash generated by the claims of western occupiers such as Tuesdayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

development.

Baradarâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s detainment will prompt the remaining militants to dig their KHHOV LQ DQG Ă&#x20AC; JKW LW RXW XQWLO WKH offensiveâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s logical conclusion.

They already have 17 civilian martyrs to align themselves to; a further 1000 families, who donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t FDUH IRU WKH Ă&#x20AC; JKWLQJ KDYH OHIW WKHLU homes for fear of being caught up LQ WKH FURVV Ă&#x20AC; UH I do believe that Operation Moshtarak will succeed in its strategic objectives; these objectives, however, seem to be slightly overlooked if part of the offensiveâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s idea is to engage with the local population.

As mentioned before, local families in Helmand began to leave their livelihoods behind at the sight of increased troops moving in

greater numbers.

What did trickle through to them from the Afghanistan conference in London was the notion that the Taliban were to be reached via communication and negotiation.

A prickly sound then, to hear the FKRSSHUV Ă&#x20AC; OO WKH VN\ ORDGHG ZLWK troops.

However, I do also believe that the Talibanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s removal will bring an improvement of trust between the military and Afghan civilians.

Reports are suggesting that the locals in Marjah are generally encouraged by seeing the Afghan army, albeit with a suspicion that PDQ\ RI WKH RIĂ&#x20AC; FHUV PD\ EH FRU rupt.

Operation Moshtarak should also be acknowledged by those who

were looking back at a year of President Obamaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s administration with feelings of stagnation.

This â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;surgeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; campaign has wider implications for the Democrats as they look to box-and-seal the Âś7DOLEDQ¡ Ă&#x20AC; OH WKDW KDV QRW VHHQ DQ RIIHQVLYH DV VLJQLĂ&#x20AC; FDQW DV WKLV since operations began in 2001.

Operation Moshtarak will most likely see the Taliban silenced, but not completely eroded. In fact, the biggest challenge faced by the Coalition forces is the sinister Taliban watermark stamped though the entire region in the form of improvised explosive devices.

For years to come, it will be both politicians and innocent civilians who will have to, quite literally, watch their step.

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

11

Comment

Money canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t buy you love Laura Heads

All we seem to hear about nowadays is â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;so and so has slept with this personâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; or â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;so and so has sent various degrading text messages to that personâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;; when did we start to become so obsessed with celebrities and their goings on?

More to the point, and perhaps a little more importantly, why do celebrities think they can get away with it?

What thoughts possibly enter their brain to enable them to believe that they are somehow untouchable, and that no one would even contemplate the idea that they could potentially earn a lot of money by selling their tale to the story-hungry tabloids.

Two of the most recent celebrities to fall foul of this poor moral judgment are Vernon Kay and, yet again, Ashley Cole (will he ever learn?)

I hate to admit it, but I was devastated when I heard that Vernon Kay had fallen to possibly the most annoying celebrity trait around; sending racy text and twitter messages to page 3 girls: honestly Vernon, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just not on.

Kayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s marriage to Tess Daly is seen as one of the strongest in show business and this has GHĂ&#x20AC; QLWHO\ URFNHG LW +LV H[FXVH KH thought it was â&#x20AC;&#x153;harmless banterâ&#x20AC;?.

I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t think you could get a worse excuse.

That being said, Ashley Coleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most recent excuse for his continued appalling behaviour could potentially trump it; when questioned as to why naked pictures of himself were sent to a topless blonde model, he explained that his perfectly legitimate excuse was that he passed the phone on to an acquaintance before the photos were sent: yes really, that was his excuse.

Unfortunately for him, another woman has come forward to say that she received similar pictures around nine months ago, so my moneyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s on the fact it was the same acquaintance that sent those pictures to her too. ,W UHDOO\ MXVW GHĂ&#x20AC; HV ORJLF DV WR why both Kay and Cole think they can get away with actions like these.

Tiger Woods, John Terry, David Beckham (note the running theme) the list goes on and on; each deciding to cheat on something that many of us would never take for granted, their marriage.

The thing celebrities donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t seem to understand is that they cannot conceal these things; they cannot just take the good publicity and attempt to conceal the bad.

The number of wanted injuncWLRQV DQG ODZ VXLWV Ă&#x20AC; OHG DJDLQVW paparazzi and photos and stories leaked is phenomenal, each one claiming that it is an invasion of their privacy; most responses go along the lines of if you want to be in the public eye you have to take the good with the bad, you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be a celebrity without it; you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t choose.

There appears to be a force around most male celebrities who feel untouchable when it comes to what they do and who they can conduct affairs with; a vaguely pretty girl comes along and theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re all over them.

7KHUH LV QR LQYLVLEOH IRUFH Ă&#x20AC; HOG of protection around celebrities guarding them from exposure when they do things wrong, there is no unwritten rule which allows them to do these things; people get hurt, and they should be held accountable for that.

I agree that this sounds a little scathing, and maybe a little O.T.T, but if one of us normal â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;non-celebrityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; people were to carry out the VDPH DFWLRQV ZH GHĂ&#x20AC; QLWHO\ ZRXOG not be allowed to get away with it; we would end up losing a lot. If celebrities want to be considered as role models, they need to begin to act like them.

Kay apologised live on his Radio One show, saying he had made â&#x20AC;&#x153;some foolish decisionsâ&#x20AC;? and had â&#x20AC;&#x153;let down a lot of people.â&#x20AC;?

Putting yourself in the victimâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s shoes just causes more blame Annabel Robertson

It is perhaps one of the most controversial subjects around today, and last week it was brought to our attention once again thanks to the results of a recent survey.

Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve all heard of judges acquitting rapists on the grounds that the women in question â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;brought it on themselvesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, but a new survey has now revealed that a large proportion of the population share this opinion; that the victims of rape are sometimes partly to blame.

The study of 1,000 people, both male and female, was conducted E\ 7KH +DYHQV D JURXS RI VH[XDO assault clinics based in London.

It found that over half of women feel that the victims of assault are somewhat responsible. +RZHYHU ZKDW LV SHUKDSV HYHQ more surprising is that it is women

aged 18 to 24 who are the most likely to judge.

1HDUO\ RQH LQ Ă&#x20AC; YH IHHO WKDW dancing provocatively, wearing UHYHDOLQJ FORWKLQJ RU Ă LUWLQJ SXWV them partly at fault. Most put the majority of cases down to stupid, drunken behaviour on the part of the woman.

(OL]DEHWK +DUULV PDQDJHU RI WKH :KLWHFKDSHO +DYHQ FRPPHQWHG that â&#x20AC;&#x153;women look at court cases and think she was drunk, she wore a short skirt, I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t do that so it wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t happen to meâ&#x20AC;?, making them feel they arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t at all at risk, and so can judge those that put themselves into that situation.

Whether they are in the right or not, I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t help but wonder why women jump to this conclusion on hearing stories of rape, especially as it is women between the ages of 18 and 24 who are more likely to go out and have a few drinks.

Sexual assault is arguably one of the most frightening things a person can suffer, so itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s surprising to me that women arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t more inclined to stand up for one

another. Some people could argue itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a fairly typical female response to not side with other women, but I

It seems to me that the conclusions made by the public, and in particular women, stem from the tendency for rape victims to hold themselves responsible think thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s more to it than this.

The University of Surrey found in 2009 that between 70 and 90% of all rape cases went unreported, and 7KH +DYHQV VXUYH\ UHYHDOHG WKDW RQH LQ Ă&#x20AC; YH ZRPHQ KDYH VDLG WKH\ GHĂ&#x20AC; QLWHO\ ZRXOGQ¡W UHSRUW D UDSH WR the police.

The main reason for this is societyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s attitude towards rape, whether itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fear of not being believed, fear of getting the rapist in trouble (as 73% of victims know their attacker), or, and perhaps more common-

ly, they feel they must have done something to bring this about.

Another issue preventing people from reporting attacks are the XQFOHDU GHĂ&#x20AC; QLWLRQV RI ZKDW DFWXDOO\ constitutes as rape. A lot of women would only regard the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;stranger in a dark alley with a knifeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; scenario as â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;real rapeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. $V 'U 0LUDQGD +RYDUWK RI WKH University of Surreyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Department of Psychology commented: â&#x20AC;&#x153;What people do not realise is that more often than not the victim knows their attacker and the assault takes place without visible injury.â&#x20AC;?

As well as this, according to the same survey carried out by 7KH +DYHQV RQH LQ IRXU ZRPHQ will be raped at some point in their lives, which is a surprisingly high number. But the survey also revealed how most women would disregard it if their assailant was a husband or a boyfriend.

Even if the rapist is reported, few are actually convicted. This is again because of public opinion that if the case doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t conform to the stereotype, people are often

inclined to blame the victim. The UK has the lowest rape conviction rate in Europe, with only one in fourteen cases resulting in conviction.

It seems to me that these conclusions made by the public, and in particular women, stem from the tendency for rape victims to hold themselves responsible. They blame the victims just as theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d blame themselves in the same situation.

The consequence of this is that only a fraction of all rape cases are reported. So whether you think victims are partly to blame or not, the result of societyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s attitude towards them means many attackers get away without any punishment.

Through publishing the results RI WKLV VXUYH\ 7KH +DYHQV DUH clearly hoping to change opinions on what is considered as rape.

Though I think the most important message here is that the attitude towards the victims needs to change, and that anyone is at risk; DV (OL]DEHWK +DUULV VWDWHG ´5DSH LV never your fault.â&#x20AC;?

12

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Comment

To over hear or not to overhear James Stubbs Columnist

Is there ever a safe drug-induced high?

Yes Daniel Rawcliffe

I hate talking to hairdressers ZKHQ WKH\¡UH FXWWLQJ P\ KDLU 1RW EHFDXVH WKH\¡UH ERULQJ RU DQ\WKLQJ ² WKH\¡UH XVXDOO\ SHUIHFWO\ QLFH ² , MXVW GRQ¡W OLNH WKH LGOH FKDWWHU PXFK 8QWLO UHFHQWO\ 0\ WKLUG WLPH at a new place and with a new KDLUGUHVVHU WKLV LV JHWWLQJ VHULRXV

DQG , QR ORQJHU Ă&#x20AC; QG P\VHOI VWDULQJ DZNZDUGO\ HLWKHU LQWR WKH PLUURU RU DW WKH Ă RRU Our relationship has reached a KHLJKW SUHYLRXVO\ XQ UHDFKHG , DFWXDOO\ HQMR\ WKH FRQYHUVDWLRQ %XW GXULQJ P\ ODVW YLVLW WKLV XQX VXDO HQMR\PHQW DQG WKH PHPRU\ RI the previous encounter there came the inevitable next step; conversaWLRQ WXUQV DZD\ IURP ZKDW , GR nightlife and weather to more personal details. He remembers the stuff I told him last time. Oh God. What will he ask of me?

7KRXJKWV WXUQ WR PDQ\ RWKHUZLVH HQMR\DEOH WRLOHW YLVLWV ZKHQ VRPH RYHU]HDORXV VZDJJHULQJ SLVVKHDG LQVLVWV RQ PDNLQJ FUXGH œSKZRDUUU¡ like statements and asks probing TXHVWLRQV DERXW WKH VWDWH RI P\ VH[ OLIH ZKLOH IXULRXVO\ VSULQNOLQJ P\ trousers with his splashback.

Will this happen here? Will I have to observe his obscene gestures and make fake chuckling noises? /XFNLO\ QR $IWHU JLYLQJ EDFN D few anecdotes of a girl I used to go out with, I left with an enormous sense of wellbeing.

We had shared a few things, but RPLWWHG PDQ\ 7KLV ZDV DIWHU DOO WKH PLGGOH RI WKH GD\ , VRXQG D ELW RI D SUXGH ,¡P QRW LW¡V MXVW DQ RGG SKRELD RI PDNLQJ FRQYHUVDWLRQ ZKLOH KDYLQJ P\ KDLU cut in this instance.

Reading through some of the comPHQWV RQ WKH 2YHUKHDUG DW 1HZFDV WOH 8QLYHUVLW\ )DFHERRN SDJH DQG UHFDOOLQJ D IHZ WKLQJV ,¡YH RYHU KHDUG P\VHOI , FDPH WR UHDOLVH WKDW LW¡V DOO WRR HDV\ WR OHW VOLS VRPHWKLQJ WKDW RWKHU SHRSOH UHDOO\ GRQ¡W QHHG to know.

Apart from being a platform from which to launch tedious and preGLFWDEOH DWWDFNV DJDLQVW GDSS\ UDKV and their apparent piles of cash, it offers some good snippets of the often surreal, boring, or disgusting nature of student life.

I can deal with hearing the odd bit of snatched conversation in the OLEUDU\ LW¡V ZKHQ \RX¡UH EULFNLQJ LW DERXW DQ H[DP RU DQ HVVD\ DQG IUDQWLFDOO\ VWUHVVLQJ DERXW LW WKDW \RX UHDOO\ GRQ¡W QHHG WR NQRZ WKH ins and outs of the nearest group of SHRSOH¡V UHFHQW VH[XDO HQFRXQWHUV MXVW EHFDXVH \RX¡UH ZKLVSHULQJ GRHVQ¡W PHDQ ZH FDQ¡W KHDU \RX 2U PD\EH WKDW¡V WKH SRLQW SHRSOH want to broadcast these machismo facts to as wide an audience as possible while seeming not to, in their PLQGV JHWWLQJ PHQWDO KLJK Ă&#x20AC; YHV IURP HYHU\ LGLRW ZLWKLQ KHDULQJ distance.

7KHQ DJDLQ LW¡V WKHVH WUXO\ KRU rendous anecdotes that sometimes OLIW P\ VSLULWV LW¡V RQO\ ZKHQ ,¡P LQ D EDG PRRG WKDW ,¡P DFWXDOO\ bothered.

7KHVH DUH IXQ 6R ZKHUH¡V WKH EHVW SODFH WR OHW WKHP à \" $Q\ZKHUH UHDOO\ EXW WU\ WR DYRLG KDLUGUHVVHUV DQG PHQ¡V WRLOHWV

Despite a fear of heights, human beings love to go up. We stand tall rather than crouch; whilst this is EHQHĂ&#x20AC; FLDO WR \RXU VSLQH LW¡V DOVR better to look at life from a higher vantage point. You are able to see PRUH ZKHQ \RX RFFXS\ VXFK D vaulted position.

Once we had mapped the globe, it was a natural progression that our attention shifted to the stars above.

7KH FRQFHSWV RI ÂśXS¡ DQG ÂśKLJK¡ DUH hardwired into who we are. On a much more prosaic level: we like to get high. $Q HDV\ ZD\ RI GRLQJ WKLV IRU WKH PDQ\ DPRQJVW XV ZKR DUH QRW astronauts) is through the use of drugs. :KLOVW LW ZRXOG EH HDV\ WR SXOO traditional pro-drug arguments out of the ether, such as â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;You are WLPHV PRUH OLNHO\ WR EH HDWHQ E\ D SDFN RI Ă HVK HDWLQJ ]RPELH children than to die when taking an HFVWDV\ WDEOHW¡ WKH WUXWK LV SHRSOH KDYH KHDUG LW DOO EHIRUH ,W¡V QRW JR ing to stop the population of Earth taking drugs.

'UXJV DUH JRRG IRU \RX 'UXJV DUH EDG IRU \RX %RWK RI WKHVH VWDWH PHQWV DUH WUXH LW¡V DV HDV\ WR KDYH D UROOLFNLQJ HYHQLQJ RQ HFVWDV\ DV LW is to experience a bollocks night on ketamine. All substances available IRU FRQVXPSWLRQ HPSOR\ WKHLU RZQ ULVN IDFWRUV LW¡V DOO D TXHVWLRQ RI

UHODWLYLW\ 7KDQN \RX (LQVWHLQ 1LFH â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;tache).

6PRNH WRR PXFK ZHHG DQG \RX¡OO HQG XS ZLWK HQRXJK GLDO D SL]]D boxes to construct a new house.

7DNH WRR PDQ\ SLOOV DQG \RX¡OO PDNH IULHQGV ZLWK HYHU\ERG\ VQRUW WRR PXFK FRFDLQH DQG \RX¡OO HQG XS with no friends.

7RR PDQ\ FLJDUHWWHV ZLOO JLYH \RX D IDFH UHGROHQW RI 7LP %XUWRQ¡V ZHGGLQJ FDNH GURRS\ ZLWK D \HO ORZ WLQJH LI \RX GULQN PRUH WKDQ HQRXJK DOFRKRO \RX ZLOO EHFRPH \HOORZ 7KH SRVVLELOLWLHV DUH HQG less.

Some substances, the latter two HVSHFLDOO\ ZRUN DW D VORZHU SDFH WKDQ RWKHUV VR LW LV RQO\ LQ WKH SDVW \HDUV WKDW WKHLU ORQJ WHUP effects have revealed themselves.

Hence the existence of educational resources available to those considHULQJ VPRNLQJ WKHLU Ă&#x20AC; UVW FLJDUHWWH RU GULQNLQJ WKHLU Ă&#x20AC; UVW SLQW RI ODJHU When one considers the risk of taking an illegal substances, one is considering the unknown, which is SUHFLVHO\ ZK\ WKHVH VXEVWDQFHV DUH so attractive. Innate human curiosLW\ GLFWDWHV WKDW WKH XQNQRZQ PXVW become known; another word for this process is education.

Instead of refusing to acknowledge the proliferation of new drugs EHFRPLQJ DYDLODEOH D ODUJH SURSRU tion of which are legal highs), we need to step back, look at them REMHFWLYHO\ DQG WKHQ GHFLGH ZKDW LV to be done.

Drugs alone do not constitute a ULVN LW LV SHRSOH¡V DWWLWXGH WRZDUGV them that presents the problem. *HWWLQJ KLJK LV ULVN\ ZKDW HYHU ZD\ \RX ORRN DW LW LQ D VN\ VFUDSHU in a plane, in a space shuttle or LQ \RXU OLYLQJ URRP ZLWK D EDJ RI weed and some rolling papers. Just UHPHPEHU WKDW ZKLOVW LW¡V QLFH WR JR upâ&#x20AC;Ś

No Tarren Smarr

,V WKHUH D VDIH KLJK" ,W¡V D WLPHOHVV TXHVWLRQ 1R ZH DUH QRW WDONLQJ DERXW WKH NLQG RI KLJK \RX JHW DIWHU GRLQJ VRPHWKLQJ FRPSOHWHO\ H[KLOD UDWLQJ OLNH VN\GLYLQJ RU FOLPELQJ D FUD]\ WDOO PRXQWDLQ 7KDW LV FDOOHG DGUHQDOLQH DQG WKDW W\SH RI KLJK LV SURGXFHG QDWXUDOO\ ZLWKLQ \RXU ERG\ 7KLV WLPH ZH DUH WDONLQJ DERXW WKH KLJK \RX FDQ JHW IURP WKH WKLQJV VXEVWDQFHV \RX SXW LQWR \RXU ERG\ /HW¡V EH UHDO UHJDUGOHVV RI ZKHWKHU the substance is legal or illegal, each RQH KDV D IDOO EDFN 6KRFN \HV HYHQ over the counter non-prescription drugs have a downside. It is writWHQ RQ WKDW ZDUQLQJ ODEHO WKDW \RX KDYH SUREDEO\ QHYHU HYHQ ORRNHG at. Warning labels are on boxes for a reason, because negative side efIHFWV LQFOXGLQJ GHDWK KDYH DFWXDOO\ happened to real people using and abusing these products. +RZ PDQ\ WLPHV KDYH \RX JRQH LQWR %RRWV LQ RUGHU WR SLFN XS VRPH medicine for a cough and had the FOHUN VD\ ´'R \RX XQGHUVWDQG WKDW WKLV LV DGGLFWLYH"¾ (YHU\ WLPH $QG WUXVW PH WKH\ ZLOO VD\ LW WKH QH[W WLPH \RX JR $QG GR \RX NQRZ ZK\ WKH\ VD\ LW" 3UREDEO\ EHFRPH VRPH LGLRW OLNHG WKH IHHOLQJ WKH\ UHFHLYHG DIWHU DFFLGHQWDOO\ WDNLQJ WRR PXFK RI VRPHWKLQJ 7KH\ OLNHG WKHLU ´KLJK¾ and formed an addiction. And it

SUREDEO\ UXLQHG WKHLU OLIH +RZ FDQ D KLJK EH ´VDIHÂľ ZKHQ DQ\ KLJK FDQ SURGXFH VXFK QHJDWLYH OLIH DOWHULQJ FRVWV" $ VDIH ´KLJKÂľ can be experienced abusing almost DQ\ PHGLFDWLRQ EXW ZKLOH LW PD\ VHHP FRRO WR EH GL]]\ DQG RQO\ VHPL DZDUH RI \RXU VXUURXQGLQJV \RX DUH DOVR DIIHFWLQJ \RXU GHFLVLRQ making processes. This can lead to KRUULEOH FRQVHTXHQFHV IRU H[DPSOH getting behind the wheel of a car ZKHQ \RX GRQ¡W KDYH FRPSOHWH FRQ WURO RYHU \RXU RZQ ERG\ OHW DORQH \RXU PLQG $QG \HV ZKLOH WKHUH PD\ EH VRPH VXEVWDQFHV WKDW DUH FXUUHQWO\ QRW FRQVLGHUHG WR EH LOOHJDO WKH\ SUREDEO\ ZLOO EH FODVVLĂ&#x20AC; HG DV LOOHJDO in the future. Most of the popular substances that are being used and DEXVHG E\ WHHQV DQG \RXQJ DGXOWV KDYH QRW \HW EHHQ HYDOXDWHG Yet, these are the substances that are undergoing research studLHV DQG HYDOXDWLRQV 6R LI \RX DUH JRLQJ WR XVH WKHP ZKLFK \RX VKRXOGQ¡W EHWWHU GR VR QRZ EHIRUH WKH WLPH FRPHV ZKHUH \RX ZLOO QRW EH DEOH WR JHW \RXU KDQGV RQ WKHP Just because something is availDEOH GRHVQ¡W PHDQ \RX VKRXOG XVH LW $WKOHWHV FRQVWDQWO\ WDON DERXW WKH ´KLJKÂľ WKH\ JHW DIWHU D JRRG work out with a little help from something called steroids. %XW VWHURLG XVH KDV EHHQ VKXQQHG worldwide leading to users being named and shamed on the inWHUQDWLRQDO OHYHO (YHQ 2O\PSLF athletes are subject to drug/steroid testing in order to compete. So just because something is available GRHVQ¡W PHDQ LW LV JRRG IRU \RX ,W¡V QRW ZRUWK WKH ULVN WR \RXUVHOI RU WKH SRWHQWLDO KDUP \RX PD\ LQĂ LFW XSRQ RWKHUV IRU DQ DOOHJHGO\ ´VDIH KLJKÂľ WKDW ZLOO RQO\ ODVW D IHZ minutes but has enough power to LPSDFW WKH UHVW RI \RXU OLIH

7KH HOHSKDQW LQ WKH URRP WKHUH¡V QR P\VWHU\ DERXW REHVLW\ C.PIERCE

Danny Kielty

:DON DURXQG DQ\ SXEOLF SODFH WKHVH GD\V DQG \RX¡UH ERXQG WR Ă&#x20AC; QG IDW NLGV 7KH\¡UH HYHU\ZKHUH (YHU\ QLJKW on the news we are subjected to ZRUU\LQJ VWDWLVWLFV VXSHU LPSRVHG RQ LPDJHV RI VRPH EOXUU\ MLJ gling fat person walking through *ULPVE\ Town centres up and down the FRXQWU\ DUH SRVLWLYHO\ ULGGOHG ZLWK the depressing sight of mum and dad plodding along with their WXEE\ OLWWOH W\NH LQ WRH DOUHDG\ ZHOO RQ KLV ZD\ WR EHFRPLQJ MXVW DV SRUWO\ DV KLV SDUHQWV We judge them. We blame them. %XW ZKDW DERXW WKH JUDQGSDUHQWV" The International Journal of ObesLW\ UHFHQWO\ UHSRUWHG WKDW FKLOGUHQ under part-time care from their JUDQGSDUHQWV DUH PRUH OLNHO\ to become obese.

7KLV LV LQGHHG ZRUU\LQJ , KHDU \RX FU\ EXW DV IDU DV ,¡P FRQ cerned, this rather obvious little nugget of information is about as shocking as the revelation that HDWLQJ 0F'RQDOG¡V HYHU\ GD\ IRU D PRQWK SUREDEO\ ZRXOGQ¡W PDLQ

tain even the slimmest of waistlines.

Grandparents spoil their grandFKLOGUHQ" 1R 1HYHU , DOZD\V thought that grandparents went around whacking their descendants with canes and subjected them to torture! )URP WKLV DKHP UHYROXWLRQDU\ QHZ Ă&#x20AC; QGLQJ ZH FDQ DOO H[SHFW ZRU U\LQJ SUHGLFWLRQV IRU WKH IXWXUH Who knows, if things get reDOO\ EDG ZLWK WKH JUDQGSDUHQWV ZH PD\ KDYH WR EDQ JUDQQ\ IURP IHHGLQJ WKH FKLOGUHQ DQ\WKLQJ EXW re-constituted gruel.

([SHFW DQ DPQHVW\ RQ :HUWKHU¡V Originals, the arrest and deportWLRQ RI FDNH EX\LQJ GLVVLGHQWV DQG WKH OLIH VHQWHQFH IRU DQ\ IRUP RI ÂśVSRLOLQJ ¡ ,Q IDFW WKLQJV PD\ EHFRPH ZRUVH *OREDO ZDUPLQJ WKH Ă&#x20AC; QDQFLDO FULVLV DQG WHHQDJH SUHJQDQF\ ZLOO DOO EH palmed-off onto the doddering GHPDJRJXH RI VRFLHW\ DV SROLWL FLDQV Ă&#x20AC; QG D QHZ DYHQXH WR DYRLG UHVSRQVLELOLW\ 1RZ PD\EH ,¡P H[DJJHUDWLQJ just a little, but this is for a reason.

(YHU\ WLPH , VHH D QHZ OLQN œJHQH IRU¡ RU PHPEHU RI IDPLO\ WR EODPH

IRU REHVLW\ , GHVSDLU ,W LV TXLWH REYLRXV WKDW LI \RX are ramming 16 pork pies a night GRZQ \RXU JL]]DUG \RX FDQ¡W UH DOO\ EODPH DQ\RQH EXW \RXU RZQ greed. People will start torching Greggs next. ,W KRQHVWO\ ZRXOG QRW VXUSULVH me if I picked up the newspaper WRPRUURZ WR EH JUHHWHG E\ DQ article claiming a worldwide conVSLUDF\ RI WKH HOGHUO\ ELWWHUO\ IDW tening up their grandchildren for the same ends as seen in Hansel and Gretel.

0\ SURSRVDO WR VROYH WKH SURE OHP RI FKLOGKRRG REHVLW\ LV QRWK LQJ VKRUW RI SLRQHHULQJ )LUVW ZH change the school curriculum so WKDW HYHU\WKLQJ FKLOGUHQ HYHU OHDUQ will revolve around vegetables.

7KH œ7KUHH /LWWOH 3LJV¡ ZLOO EHFRPH WKH œ7KUHH /LWWOH 3DUVQLSV¡ SRUN LV ZD\ WRR IDWWHQLQJ WKH œ9HU\ +XQJU\ &DWHUSLOODU¡ ZLOO RI FRXUVH EH UH QDPHG WKH œ1R 7KDQNV ,¡YH -XVW +DG D 5LFH &DNH &DWHUSLOODU¡ DQG -DPLH 2OLYHU¡V KHDOWK\ HDWLQJ SURJUDPPH ZLOO UHSODFH (QJOLVK +LVWRU\ DQG IXQ The words sugar, fat and happiness will all become profanities DQG UHPRYHG IURP WKH GLFWLRQDU\ Yes, children will eat, sleep and learn vegetables.

The world will then be comSOHWHO\ HPSW\ RI JUDQGSDUHQWV IDW 7H[DQV DQG RI FRXUVH DQ\RQH ZKR SOD\V GDUWV 3LH DQ\RQH"

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

13

Comment

Letters to the Editor Laws do not depend on religious ideals

Choice would be a Ă&#x20AC;QH WKLQJ

Dear Editor,

Dear Editor,

I was truly delighted by your article May the Force be with you: religion turned on its head (Issue 1204 S ULJKW XS XQWLO WKH Ă&#x20AC;QDO WZR paragraphs where it is asserted that the move away from Christianity in Britain is â&#x20AC;&#x153;devastatingâ&#x20AC;?.

I was equally surprised to learn that, contrary to what my rather expensive two-and-a-half years of legal education has taught me, â&#x20AC;&#x153;our entire justice system is based on the 10 commandmentsâ&#x20AC;?.

While it is true that the UK has a largely Christian past, I would like to remind readers that it was not all wine and roses when Captain God was in charge. Atheists, pagans, Muslims (remember the crusades?) and even other Christians werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t safe as everyone gathered around for another good old heathen-burnLQJ $OVR OHW XV QRW IRUJHW WKH Ă&#x20AC;QH American chappies in white hoods and cloaks. As Colm Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Gorman put it, â&#x20AC;&#x153;For the church to criticize secular society while at the same time not looking in any way at itself for most people is a reason they turn away from it.â&#x20AC;?

The move away from Christianity has led to a more egalitarian recognition that people can believe what they like and still be good people.

The Human Rights Act guarantees freedom of religion in Britain and that tolerance, not religious dogma, is the glue that holds society together.

Finally, the judicial system of this country has been in constant evolution since the 12th century. Our modern legal system resembles the 10 commandments about as much as the interior of a Michelin-starred restaurant resembles a McDonalds.

A quick glance at Wikipedia (sureO\ DQRWKHU FDQGLGDWH IRU 'HLĂ&#x20AC;FDWLRQ in the next census) told me that the 10 commandments have as many interpretations as there are reliJLRQV DQG E\ P\ FRXQW WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW Ă&#x20AC;YH on the traditional protestant view have no relevance to our secular legal system (demanding obedience to this particular concept of God), six, eight and nine are no-brainers (donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t kill, steal or defame), seven is obsolete (adultery is not a crime in this country), while ten seems to forbid thoughtcrime.

By my reckoning, this leaves at least 95% of my textbooks uncovered, so forgive me if I look to the statute book rather than the Bible in order to pass my exams.

Far from destroying the heart and soul of the country, the move away from religion ought to be a celebrated advance as we encourage people to make up their own minds. Pastafarianism is a backlash against truth-claims and a promotion of free-thinking which can only EHQHĂ&#x20AC;W VRFLHW\ DV D ZKROH Believe what you like, but please donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t belittle my degree and secular beliefs by telling me that I, or anyone else in this country, need the threat of eternal damnation to be a moral person. This may be a small point to pick up on in what was otherwise a very interesting article, but the assumptions inherent those statements needed to be addressed.

I was intrigued to read your front page interview with Councillor John Shipley last week; however it left me feeling both disappointed and infuriated. The extent of my discontent is such that it has led me to pen this response.

My restlessness stems from the approach of Shipley towards the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;student issueâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, and his failure to be honest about the Councilâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s policies.

There are a number of problems with his comments that I feel need addressing in order for students to fully understand the extent of their ostracism.

Firstly, Councillor Shipley is keen to assert that the provision of 5,000 purpose-built student beds is not the result of attempts to drive students out of areas such as Jesmond and Heaton, instead he presents a facade of increasing â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;student choiceâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

What he fails to mention, however, is that the accommodation traditionally utilised by students in residential areas (known as Houses of Multiple Occupancy, or HMOs) can be considerably reduced in number by the Council itself. Legislation passed by Newcastle City Council in 2007 gives the Council VLJQLĂ&#x20AC;FDQW SRZHUV RI UHJXODWLRQ over this sector. As a result, the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;choiceâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; that Councillor Shipley champions will radically narrow as the HMO provisions in studentfavoured areas are diminishing.

Hardly fair then, but unsurprising considering 5,000 new bed spaces have been advocated despite 75% of students explicitly indicating their reluctance to live in halls of residence type accommodation EH\RQG Ă&#x20AC;UVW \HDU DV \RX GLG ZHOO WR point out in your article.

It would not play well with council tax payers if these new tower blocks were to become unoccupied white elephants.

The Council wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be so reckless though, as this particular burden will undoubtedly be passed on to private-sector accommodation providers â&#x20AC;&#x201C; companies that will QDWXUDOO\ ORRN WRZDUGV SURĂ&#x20AC;WV RYHU student welfare.

Take, for example, the privately owned Victoria Halls that opened DV Ă&#x20AC;UVW \HDU DFFRPPRGDWLRQ ODVW year. The cost of a standard room here is ÂŁ92.55 per week, staggering when compared to the ÂŁ50 per week I pay for my more than adequate HMO in Heaton.

Even with bills included my accommodation is not even comparable; I, and probably a good majority of students, simply cannot afford the alternative.

Thankfully the true thoughts of the anti-student lobby were honestly expressed in your article by the Fern Avenue resident, brandishing â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;drunken studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; as â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;the problemâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. This represents the inherent nimbyism of areas such as Jesmond. By moving students out of residential areas into purposebuilt blocks, the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;problemâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; will certainly not be solved but, rather, transferred and highly concentrated into another part of Newcastle.

For the Council though, this will be seen as more of an opportunity, as areas such as Byker and SheildĂ&#x20AC;HOG FRXOG EH SRWHQWLDO VLWHV IRU student relocation.

Your sincerely, JAMES HAIKNEY

Deprived areas of Newcastle will surely be highlighted as ideal spots for the new student ghettos, because the economic renovation will be staggering.

6WXGHQWV DUH QRW Ă&#x20AC;VFDO WRROV WR EH used to modernise areas previously neglected by the Council though, and the Council should be exposed if this does become the case.

Your Fern Avenue resident is correct in saying that Jesmond is no longer â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;what it wasâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, but neither is Newcastle. The recent transformation that Newcastle as a city has gone through has been incredible, DQG VWXGHQWV KDYH SOD\HG D VLJQLĂ&#x20AC;cant role in this.

Jesmond has been a part of these changes, developing in tandem with the cultural upgrade that has taken place.

I am not looking to defend noisy, drunken, anti-social behaviour, nor do I expect anyone to have to put up with it, but students should be aware of the Councilâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s true intentions, and not fooled by the misleading rhetoric of John Shipley and his fellow City Councillors; FKRLFH ZRXOG EH D Ă&#x20AC;QH WKLQJ Yours sincerely, ADAM SMITH Emails in response to articles should be sent to the Editor at editor.union@ncl.ac.uk

Editing needs to be more careful Dear Editor, Your front page crosshead claims WKDW D ODG\ ´RYHUFDPH KHU Ă&#x20AC;JKWÂľ with anorexia. What on earth does that mean? What is â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;overcoming a Ă&#x20AC;JKW"¡ 'R \RX PHDQ VKH ZRQ KHU Ă&#x20AC;JKW" 2U VLPSO\ WKDW VKH RYHUFDPH anorexia? Having read the article referred to, it seems that she is winQLQJ KHU Ă&#x20AC;JKW ² DQG JRRG IRU KHU On page 2, col. 1, we read that blame was â&#x20AC;&#x153;appropriated toâ&#x20AC;? someone. Whereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s your bloody dictionary? Look up â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;appropriatedâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

Why not simply â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;blame was laid onâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; someone.

3OHDVH Ă&#x20AC;QG D OLWHUDWH VXE HGLWRU Yours sincerely, PEDANT Pedant - Admittedly, if you think carefully about the heading at the top of last weekâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s front page, it may not make literal sense and perhaps a different choice of words could have been used here to express the same meaning.

However, phrases of this type are in common usage in the English language â&#x20AC;&#x201C; a quick Google search will show you as much â&#x20AC;&#x201C; and, while it may be bad practice, newspaper headlines do not always have to make literal sense to convey the meaning they desire.

In fact, on the day of receiving this letter, I was involved in a web chat with Richard Dixon, The Timesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; chief revise editor and guardian of grammatical correctness.

He said that the headline in question â&#x20AC;&#x153;made perfect senseâ&#x20AC;? to him and I would be very surprised if you did not understand what was supposed to be meant by that headline yourself.

Again, the phrase â&#x20AC;&#x153;appropriated toâ&#x20AC;? may not make literal sense and â&#x20AC;&#x153;blame was laidâ&#x20AC;? may have been a better choice.

However, why pick on this phrase?

Look through the rest of the paper and you will see far worse errors than this â&#x20AC;&#x201C; spelling mistakes, typos, even a Sudoku with no gaps.

And this brings me on to my main point. The Courier is a student newspaper. It is written by, edited by and proofed by students. All but one are unpaid volunteers who give up over 20 hours of their time each week to produce a newspaper that you can sit at \RXU GHVN DQG SLFN Ă DZV ZLWK %HOLHYH PH , DP WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW WR FXUVH DQ\ spelling mistake, grammatical error or Ă DZ LQ WKH GHVLJQ But while I continue to strive for an error free issue and put in every measure possible to do so, it has to be remembered that producing a 44-page weekly newspaper is a hell of a feat for a group of people who are also trying to get a degree at the same time.

So apologies for a couple of grammatical mistakes. Perhaps next time you would like to back-up your opinions with a name. (Editor)

14

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

How to thumb it to Africa: Hitch Soc show you how Life & Style Editors: Larisa Brown, Alex Felton and Ashley Fryer - courier.life@ncl.ac.uk

> Travel, page 20

life

0\ EDWWOH DJDLQVW FDQFHU As our series of in-depth stories continues, cancer patient Roz White reveals how she juggles her medical studies with a life-threatening disease

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THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

15

Follow The Penny Pincher on Facebook for daily deals >>>facebook.com/pennypincher

Hair The hair deserves an article all of its own, but to cut a long story (or hair) short, when I found out I was going to lose my long curly locks, I preemptively chopped them off into a Marilyn-style bob as a sort of twoĂ&#x20AC;QJHU VDOXWH WR WKH +RGJH 7KHQ WZR ZHHNV DIWHU WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW chemo my hair decided to give up DQG ORWV RI LW IHOO RXW ,Q KDQGIXOV This was extremely annoying but I was still left with about half or a WKLUG RI LW VR , G\HG LW SLQN It carried on falling out, though at a slower rate, so I shaved it down shorter and shorter until I thought I might as well just go the whole hog ² VR DIWHU WKH VL[WK DQG Ă&#x20AC;QDO FKHPR WKH Ă DWPDWHV DOO JDWKHUHG WR VFUDSH the bristles off my head and I was EDOG DQG VKLQ\ It was quite creepy and I was glad ZKHQ LW VWDUWHG JURZLQJ EDFN DJDLQ

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too, to my neck and a little bit of my FKHVW ,W GHĂ&#x20AC;QLWHO\ ZDVQ¡W DV EDG DV chemo, although having a sore throat for almost a month was not P\ LGHD RI IXQ , TXLFNO\ EHFDPH REsessed with frappuccinos, ice-cream, risotto, smoothies, and anything else squashy enough to be swallowed ZLWKRXW H[WUHPH SDLQ Alcohol was off the menu for posVLEO\ WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW WLPH VLQFH )UHVKHUV¡ :HHN )RUWXQDWHO\ WKH VRUH WKURDW resolved pretty soon after and I was DEOH WR JHW EDFN WR JLQ VZLJJLQJ

The Next Step Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been called back to the hospital pretty often for follow-up, which LVQ¡W XVXDO 1RUPDOO\ \RX KDYH WR JR away for months at a time and not bother your haematologist unless \RX JHW DQ\ PRUH OXPSV +RZHYHU P\ IROORZ XS &7 VFDQ before Christmas showed that one of my armpit lymph nodes was enlarged; either because of my swine Ă X MDE RU D UHODSVH VR , KDG D YHU\ jittery Christmas having PET-scans, waiting for PET-scan results, freakLQJ RXW EHLQJ UH &7 VFDQQHG Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been a very anxious couple of months, but last Wednesday I got my CT results back and they are utWHUO\ EOLVVIXOO\ QRUPDO ,W ZDV WKH best early birthday present ever!

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1RZ ,¡P EDFN RQ WUDFN ZLWK WKH usual level of follow-up; I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have WR UHWXUQ WR WKH 1RUWKHUQ &HQWUH IRU Cancer Care until May, and by then I hope to have an impressive curly ZDIUR WR VKRZ RII People often ask me if my experiHQFHV KDYH FKDQJHG PH :HOO WKHUH is the obvious loss of my golden, expensively highlighted tresses â&#x20AC;&#x201C; I am still bitter about spending ÂŁ70 at the hairdressers only to have it all fall out a month later - and their replacement with an insane curly mop that â&#x20AC;&#x153;does the fandangoâ&#x20AC;?, to quote one RI P\ IULHQGV That doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t really matter though; LW¡V RQO\ KDLU , GR IHHO ROGHU LQ D way, more mature, though some SHRSOH ZRXOG GHĂ&#x20AC;QLWHO\ FRQWUDGLFW PH RQ WKLV

When I found out I was going to lose my long curly locks, I pre-emptively chopped them off I have had the opportunity to develop a wonderfully black sense of humour, and to write a very absorbLQJ EORJ ,¡YH PHW VRPH ZRQGHUIXO people also struggling with their badly-behaved lymphocytes, and been nominated for the LymphoPD $VVRFLDWLRQ¡V %HDFRQ RI +RSH $ZDUG $V D PHGLFDO VWXGHQW , GHĂ&#x20AC;QLWHO\ have much more insight into pa-

tientsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; experiences after my own; I quite often didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have a clue about what was going on and it was very IUXVWUDWLQJ Obviously the possibility of relapse hangs like the sword of Damocles over the head of any cancer patient, DV P\ ODWHVW VFDUH VKRZV I normally choose to adopt a calm and philosophical attitude, allowing room for the odd nervous breakdown, and take things one step at a WLPH I know very well that I wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have got through this year if it werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t for the support of my family and friends, who were and are SUHWW\ EORRG\ IDQWDVWLF Who do you know would drive a 600-mile round trip from Wales to 1HZFDVWOH LQ RQH GD\ WR PDNH VXUH their daughter didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t miss the entire Easter family holiday because of FKHPR" $QVZHU ² P\ GDG My grandparents looked after me in radiotherapy and made me a lot of squashy food; my siblings were always ready to take the mick and ZDWFK Ă&#x20AC;OPV P\ PRWKHU ZDV MXVW there, like a rock, but cuter and cudGOLHU My friends made the pre-chemo weekends more fun than I could have imagined, and brought me FKRFRODWH LQ FKHPR , GRQ¡W NQRZ how Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll ever thank them all, except by saying, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Ta loves!â&#x20AC;? in The Courier For further information on Rozâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s extraordinary past year, visit rozandthehodge.blogspot.com

Life Life & Style

The Penny Pincher Lesson 13: Loyalty Cards Rowan Taylor Columnist

Martin Lewis, the Money saving expert, says â&#x20AC;&#x153;Loyalty is a consumer GLVHDVHÂľ )RU EDQN DFFRXQWV WKDW LV certainly true, but if we can be rewarded for the purchases we make DQ\ZD\ WKHQ ZKR¡V FRPSODLQLQJ Tesco Clubcard: Regularly singled out as the reason behind Tescoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s monolithic success; their Clubcard is a smart addition to DQ\ ZDOOHW RU SXUVH Points can be earnt not only at 7HVFR EXW ZLWK ( RQ HQHUJ\ WRR $ pound may only be worth 1p in rewards, but think of how much you spend in Tesco and how quickly it ZLOO PRXQW XS The vouchers arrive every 3 months, but wait a moment before you spend it against your weekly VKRS 5HZDUG FXUUHQF\ LV UHGHHPable for Clubcard Deals at 4 times WKH IDFH YDOXH Â&#x2026; IRU D /RDGHG VXEVFULSWLRQ Â&#x2026; IRU D &RVPRpolitan subscription, ÂŁ10 for an $OWRQ 7RZHUV WLFNHW Â&#x2026; IRU D Â&#x2026; 6WUDGD YRXFKHU Since August, Tesco has been kind and given you double points RQ \RXU VKRSSLQJ SHU Â&#x2026; 7KLV will now carry through to this VXPPHU DW OHDVW ,I \RX VHH DQ\ left Tesco receipts, hanging off the Self-Service machine, check if the &OXEFDUG SRLQWV ZHUH DZDUGHG ,I not, theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re yours!

Nectar is Sainsburyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s offering, giving shoppers the equivalent RI EDFN $VGD DQG 0RUULVRQV do not operate a loyalty scheme, instead claiming everyday low SULFHV Boots declare their Advantage card is the most generous reward scheme in the country, giving 4p SHU Â&#x2026; 7KH\¡UH QRW IDU ZURQJ EXW they choose to ignore the fact that their products are at least 4% more H[SHQVLYH WKDQ 6XSHUGUXJ +RZHYHU WKH $GYDQWDJH FDUG LV worth having for the Meal Deals DORQH $V D PDQ WKRXJK , WHQG WR hide my Boots card out of sight in P\ ZDOOHW HMV no longer offer us their 10% student discount cards, but as if to compensate, now have a rewards VFKHPH ,W UHTXLUHV D Â&#x2026; LQYHVWment however, and the points run RXW DIWHU \HDUV EXW KHDY\ XVHUV RI +09 FDQ HDUQ PRQH\ FDQ¡W EX\ VLJQHG &'V DQG PRYLH SULQWV 1H[W ZHHN /HVVRQ /HLVXUH

Roz, left, died her hair pink after it began to fall out following chemotherapy. Roz, right, is photographed further on in the chemotherapy process with her hair starting to grow back

Deals of the Week: 6QLFNHUV 0RUH 1XWV IRU Â&#x2026; # Sainsburyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s %5,7 $ZDUGV $OEXP Â&#x2026; # L7XQHV A 66-song mammoth package including loads of new releases is great value if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re into chart PXVLF /\Q[ VKRZHU JHO Â&#x2026; # $VGD ,QFOXGHV Ă DYRXUV RI $IULFD &OLFN Instinct, Twist and Dark TemptaWLRQ 1RQH RI ZKLFK ZLOO JHW \RX ODLG

16

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Life & Style Fashion

fashion Fairtrade Fortnight special

Dress - Beyond Retro: ÂŁ12 Skirt - Oxfam: ÂŁ3.99 Scarf - Liberties: ÂŁ19.95 per m Jumper - Beyond Retro: ÂŁ15 Heels - Topshop: ÂŁ45

Shirt - Cancer Research: ÂŁ6 Scarf - Cancer Research: ÂŁ1 Socks - Uniqlo: ÂŁ8 Belt - Modelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Own

Fair fashion: the rise of Fairtrade clothing Katherine Bannon examines the world of fashionable Fairtrade

A

dmit it. Every time you remember to take those used plastic bags on a Tesco trip you feel like youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve single-handedly rescued a polar bear from a melting ice cap using a rubber dingy and then swam back home to save on carbon emissions.

But with it being Fairtrade Week this week, how about helping the world that way? Fairtrade previously used to denote over-priced chocolate, pretty in packaging but not worth the extra few pennies over a bar of Cadburyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s - but when you can help the planet and look good while doing it, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s time to jump the ethical train to the station of moral satisfacWLRQ DQG IDVKLRQ Ă&#x20AC;QHVVH Organic cotton is produced from QRQ JHQHWLFDOO\ PRGLĂ&#x20AC;HG SODQWV which are grown without the use of any synthetic agricultural chemicals such as fertilizers or pesticides.

These pollute the air and surface waters, shift the equilibrium of ecosystems and decrease biodiversity.

Meanwhile, the production of non-

organic cotton is responsible for 16% of the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s pesticides and uses more chemicals per unit area than any other crop. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a lot.

So take a step on to the high street.

Topshop, H&M, New Look and Marks and Spencers are amongst those fashion retail favourites eager to make an impact on the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ever swelling carbon footprint.

New Look introduced an Organic Cotton range in Summer 2007, with cotton and cotton-mixed fabrics being among the most popular fabrics.

In light of the rangeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s success, it has now begun to research fabrics made from sustainable sources which protect the environment and make use of the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s natural resources.

This includes garments made from bamboo and organic cotton and Ă HHFHV PDGH IURP SODVWLF ERWWOHV Meanwhile, Topshop started with using Fairtrade cotton in its jerseys, jeans and accessories department and expanded its eco-friendly range even further last year with dresses and scarves.

But arguably the pinnacle of fair trade fashion is People Tree, who pride themselves in producing a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;beautiful changeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, alongside every beautiful garment, onto their rails.

Emma Watson (pictured, right) has

just this month launched her own line for the company.

The company started in 1991 in Japan as a global village, launching its Ă DJVKLS VWRUH LQ 7RN\R LQ The company was introduced to the UK in 2001, earning a coveted spot in the consessions area of Topshop on Oxford St. in 2006.

People Tree aim to help people in all aspects of clothing manufacture: from growing cotton, weaving, and dyeing, to embroidery and stitching.

H&M has provided support for organic cotton in its environmental work since 2004 and has been using it in clothing since 2007.

The womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s collection includes tube dresses, oversized sweaters and hoodies, as well as printed tshirts for a quirky yet casual way to make a difference.

Last spring it introduced garments made from recycled materials such as polyester from PET bottles or textile remnants and even wool from used and over-worn pieces of clothing and fabrics.

Even Primark, usually disgraced for its use of sweatshops and the appalling working conditions of its supply chain, is stocking an organic cotton range for both men and women.

Fur COPYRIGHT CANTATA, L.P.

Yet it is obviously Marks and Spencers, the domineering materQDO Ă&#x20AC;JXUH RI DOO GHSDUWPHQW VWRUHV that provides the ultimate pillar of planet Earth hugging goodness.

With Eldon Square having recently undergone a much needed architectural surgery thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no excuse. Letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s go save another polar bear.

Fairtrade Fortnight This yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Fairtrade Fortnight is set to run from Monday 22 February until Sunday 7 March.

The theme is the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Big Swapâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; encouraging people to switch from their usual products to fairly traded ones. More information can be found online at www.fairtrade.org.uk.

Newcastle Studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Union is also aiming to petition big companies to source fairly traded consumables, namely tea. There is to be a Fairtrade tea stand, collecting signatures and giving out free cups of tea. Anyone interested will be welcomed between 11am and 1pm any day for a brew and to petition to improve trade in the developing world.

Emma Watson: the face of People Tree

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

17

Fashion Life & Style

Models: Kath Little, Alice Gunter Photograhy: Claire Hall Styling: Addy Pope, Claire Hall

Bra - Topshop Skirt - Oxfam: ÂŁ6 r Jacket - Tynemouth Market: ÂŁ15

Shorts - British Heart Foundation: ÂŁ3.99 Top - Mind: ÂŁ2 Jacket - Best Vintage: ÂŁ16 Heels - Topshop: ÂŁ45 Headband: Accessorize: ÂŁ15

Tie - Modelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Own Dress - Northumbria Vintage Fair: ÂŁ8 Scarf - Liberties: ÂŁ19:95 per m Coat - Northumbria Vintage Fair ÂŁ20

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Never the king of understatementâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Alex Felton looks back at the life of Alexander McQueen following his shock suicide two weeks ago Outstanding in so many respects and regarded amongst the fashion elite as somewhat of a maverick, Alexander McQueen was a designer who entertained and brilliantly pushed the boundaries through his creations.

Tenacious and exciting, the lad from Lewisham in East London had clawed his way through the relentless and unforgiving world that is the fashion industry and will be remembered as one of the brightest sparks of the last twenty years.

Lee Alexander McQueen started his career on Saville Row as an apprentice at the age of 18 with Anderson & Sheppard and subsequently Gieves & Hawkes.

His years spent designing crisp and elegant suits on Saville Row earned him the reputation for creating stylish and impeccable tailored creations.

After spending time in Milan for Koji Tatsuno and Romano Gigli, he returned to London and enrolled as a student at Central St. Martinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s College in London earning an MA in fashion design.

His talent was insurpassable and he stood out for his daring. His entire degree collection was bought by WKH LQĂ XHQWLDO 9RJXH VW\OLVW ,VDEHOOD Bow, giving him the exposure he needed to continue with his passion.

/90+ FDPH NQRFNLQJ RQ WKH GRRU of â&#x20AC;&#x153;Lâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;enfant terribleâ&#x20AC;? as he was subsequently nicknamed by the French press, and he stepped into the ominous shoes left by the departing John Galliano at Givenchy.

McQueen endured a tumultuous UHODWLRQVKLS ZLWK /90+ H[HFXWLYHV and his time at Givenchy, although successful, earning him the accolade of British Designer of the Year four times between 1996 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 2003, was never short of controversy.

He left to pursue his own ventures after stating in an interview WKDW /90+ ZDV ´FRQVWUDLQLQJ KLV creativityâ&#x20AC;?, and he established his own label in partnership with rivals Gucci.

McQueen was revered by his contemporaries, and his daring collections turned heads on the catwalk.

This was a designer who not only

wanted to exhibit his creations to the world but also wanted to test our perceptions of the appropriate DQG VWLFN D PLGGOH Ă&#x20AC;QJHU XS WR WKH status quo.

Throughout his illustrious career, McQueen maintained his rebellious nature and was the pioneer of designs that included the bumster jeans of the mid-90â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s and numerous skull motifs. ,QGHHG QRW RQO\ ZHUH KLV GHVLJQV shocking to behold but the incorporation of technology into his shows, DV ZHOO DV EHLQJ WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW %ULWLVK GHVLJQHU WR XVH ,QGLDQ PRGHOV DQG DPputees, proved that McQueen was determined to bring rock and roll and theatre onto the catwalk.

0F4XHHQ GLHG DJHG DW KLV Ă DW in Mayfair, allegedly committing suicide days after the death of his much loved mother.

Alexander McQueen: 1969-2010

18

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Life & Style Sex & Relationships

sex & relationships Two Girls & A Coffee Shop Kath Little & Fran Swan Columnists

The alarm goes off. He groggily opens his eyes...â&#x20AC;?Wow, that sunVKLQH¡V EULJKWÂľ ,V WKDW D WUDIĂ&#x20AC;F FRQH QH[W WR KLV EHG" :K\ GRHV KH KDYH Âś, ORYH VZHHWFRUQ¡ GHDU *RG , KRSH LW¡V PDUNHU SHQQHG RQ KLV FKHVW" 7HOO PH WKDW¡V QRW D GLDPRQWH HDUULQJ ´:KHUH GLG , HYHQ JR ODVW QLJKW"Âľ WKH VWDPS RQ KLV IRUHKHDG LV \RXU Ă&#x20AC;UVW FOXH WKH JLUO ZKR ZRUNV RQ WKH WLOO O\LQJ QH[W WR KLP LV \RXU VHFRQG ,V WKDW WKH DODUP DJDLQ" 2K ZDLW LW¡V \RXU JLUOIULHQG FDOOLQJ WR VHH how your night went. :KHQ LV ´, ZDV VR GUXQNÂľ D OHJLWLPDWH H[FXVH" %HWWHU \HW ZKHQ GRHV ´, GRQ¡W HYHQ UHPHPEHU LWÂľ PDNH LW RN" &XW to just over half-way through RXU SUHDFKLQJ UDQW DQG \RX¡OO Ă&#x20AC;QG WKDW ZH¡YH EHHQ WKHUH WRR JUDQWHG ZLWKRXW FDXVLQJ DQ\ KHDUWEUHDN 6WLOO ZH¡YH ERWK ZRNHQ XS with a hazy memory of the night before, that ominous smell of YRPLW FRPLQJ IURP WKH Ă RRU DQG HYHU VR P\VWHULRXVO\ QDNHG )XOO\ QDNHG 2XWVLGH RXU EHGURRP GRRU 2XU LQWHQWLRQV ZHUH JRRG %XW ZKDW KDSSHQV ZKHQ \RX DGG D RQH QLJKW VWDQG ZLWK D JLUO ZKR LV QRW \RXU ORQJ WHUP JLUOIULHQG LQWR WKH HTXDWLRQ" ,QGHHG RXU LQLWLDO UHDFWLRQ WR WKRVH WKDW FKHDW DQG FODLP WKH\ GRQ¡W UHPHPEHU LV ´%XOOVKLW ,W¡V QR H[FXVHÂľ 6XUHO\ GXULQJ WKHLU JDPH RI WRQVLO WHQQLV WKH\ KDG VRPH LGHD WKDW ZKDW WKH\ ZHUH GRLQJ ZDV wrong. Not to mention, how PDQ\ WLPHV FRXOG WKH\ XVH WKDW H[FXVH" 7KH DYHUDJH VWXGHQW JHWV GUXQN ZKDW" 7KUHH RU IRXU WLPHV D ZHHN" 'RHV WKLV PHDQ IUHH UHLJQ every time you go out, just beFDXVH RI PHPRU\ ODSVHV" However, he assures you it was D PLVWDNH +H RQO\ KDV H\HV IRU \RX +H ORYHV \RX +H GRHV VHHP UHDOO\ VRUU\ DQG LW ZDV RQO\ RQH time.

7KHUH LV GHĂ&#x20AC;QLWHO\ URRP IRU forgiveness here. However, if it ZHUH WR EHFRPH D PRUH IUHTXHQW RFFXUUHQFH ZH UHFRPPHQG PRUH GUDVWLF DFWLRQ 7KH H[FXVH ZHDUV WKLQ DIWHU RQH XVH UDWKHU OLNH D 3ULPDUN W VKLUW $IWHU WKLV WLPH ZKLFK ZH FDQ all empathise with, you run the ULVN RI EHLQJ ZDONHG DOO RYHU 7HOO KLP LW¡V SHUIHFWO\ Ă&#x20AC;QH WR NLVV RWKHU JLUOV KH MXVW ZRQ¡W EH NLVVLQJ \RX 8OWLPDWHO\ FKHDWLQJ LV FKHDWLQJ 7UHDW LW DV VXFK DQG \RX FDQ¡W JR ZURQJ 7KH VHFRQG WLPH KH FRXOG KDYH WKH HQWLUH FROOHFWLRQ RI ZLGH H\HG IUXLWORRS DUWZRUN IURP )ORULWDV DQG WKH FKDQGHOLHU IURP &HQWUDO 6WDWLRQ LQ KLV URRP EXW WKH ´, ZDV VR GUXQNÂľ H[FXVH ZRQ¡W EH VR FRQYLQFLQJ

Email courier. life@ncl.ac.uk if you would like to go on your very own Blind Date

blind date Katie Morris & Oliver Wood She said: $IWHU ZKDW RQO\ FDQ EH GHVFULEHG DV D ´%ULGJHW -RQHV HVTXHÂľ YDOHQWLQH¡V GD\ , ZDV GHWHUPLQHG QRW WR VSHQG 6KURYH 7XHVGD\ VWXIĂ&#x20AC;QJ P\ IDFH ZLWK FKRFRODWH SDQFDNHV LQ EHG 6R ZKHQ WKH RIIHU RI D EOLQG GDWH arose, I thought why the hell not.

'DWH DQG WLPH ZHUH VHW 5HYROXWLRQ YRGND LV D ZHOO NQRZQ FXUH IRU QHUYHV DQG WKHQ RQWR 6WDUWHUV DQG 3XGV NHHSLQJ RQ ZLWK WKH SDQFDNH theme).

6R WKHUH ZH ZHUH 3UHVLGHQW RI WKH ZRPHQ¡V UXJE\ WHDP DQG FDSWDLQ RI WKH ; FRXQWU\ WHDP WR VD\ WKH OHDVW KH SRVHG QR WKUHDW WR PH :H ZDONHG RYHU WR 6WDUWHUV DQG 3XGV ZKLFK LV ZKHQ , UHDOLVHG WKDW IRU WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW WLPH WKLV ZDV JRLQJ WR EH D GDWH ZKHUH , ZRXOG EH WKH RQH wearing the trousers. &RQYHUVDWLRQ Ă RZHG DQG WKRVH DZNZDUG VLOHQFHV ZKLFK VR IUHTXHQWO\ FDXVH D Ă&#x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¡UH D ORYHO\ JX\ EXW VDGO\

ask seĂąor jose

SeĂąor Jose is back from perving over Cheryl Cole at the Brit Awards to answer your questions. Feel free to email courier.life@ncl. ac.uk for his help

WKH RQO\ VSDUNV , IHOW ZHUH LQ RXU Ă DPLQJ VDPEXFD He said: :H SODQQHG WKH GDWH IRU 7XHVGD\ 16th February, turning out to be a FRPSOHWH VFKRROER\ HUURU GXH WR WKH 0DQ 8QLWHG Y 0LODQ JDPH 7KLQNLQJ WKDW VZLWFKLQJ WKH YHQXH from a restaurant to a sports bar may DIIHFW P\ UHYLHZ DQG DOO SRVVLEOH FKDQFH RI HYHU JHWWLQJ ODLG DJDLQ , VWXFN WR WKH SODQ RI PHHWLQJ LQ 5HYV DQG JRLQJ IRU D PHDO ,¡P QRW JRLQJ WR EHDW DURXQG WKH bush so Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll just say - Katie was a Ă&#x20AC;QH IHPDOH VSHFLPHQ DQG ODGV \RX SeĂąor, My girlfriend keeps trying to persuade me that our sex life needs to be more adventurous. I am happy with some missionary, a bit of doggy style and the odd reverse cowgirl, but she is talking about anal beads and all sorts of things I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even pronounce! I know as a man I am supposed to be up for anything, but how can I tell her Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not into that stuff without seeming boring? Help! ,I \RX¡UH QRW FRPIRUWDEOH GRLQJ WKH WKLQJV \RXU JLUOIULHQG LV DVNLQJ \RX WR GR WKHUH¡V QRWKLQJ VD\LQJ \RX KDYH WR GR WKHP +RZHYHU EHDU LQ PLQG WKDW ZKHQ VH[ EHFRPHV URXWLQH LW DOVR EHFRPHV OHVV fun. Sure, thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a no-brainer, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s something to be aware of. There LV QRWKLQJ OHVV HQFKDQWLQJ WKDQ D RQH WULFN SRQ\ ,I \RX¡UH VWDUWLQJ WR EHFRPH SUHGLFWDEOH WKDW¡V ZKHQ \RX UHDOO\ QHHG WR PDNH DQ HIIRUW WR FKDQJH \RXU JDPH Now, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not saying go all out DQG VWDUW EX\LQJ ZKLSV DQG FXIIV DQG IHWLVK PDVNV ,QVWHDG WU\ RXW VRPH GLIIHUHQW SRVLWLRQV ,QWURGXFH IRRG LQWR WKH EHGURRP ZLWK WKLQJV OLNH FKRFRODWH RU LFH FUHDP %XW

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7KH UHVW RI WKH WLPH DW 6DP -DFNV ZH SRQGHUHG RYHU D SRO\ QLJKW¡V EDQWHU DQG KRZ WKH\ SUREDEO\ ZRXOG VSHQG WKH UHVW RI WKHLU ZRUNLQJ OLYHV LQ D IDFWRU\ 7KH QLJKW ZDV FRPLQJ WR D FORVH DQG ZH ZHUH ERWK D OLWWOH GUXQN IRU OHJDO UHDVRQV , FDQ¡W WHOO \RX ZKDW KDSSHQHG QH[W EXW WKHUH LV SRWHQWLDO IRU D YLGHR EHLQJ SRVWHG RQ 5HG7XEH VRPHWLPH QH[W ZHHN :LOO , VHH .DWLH DJDLQ" ,¡OO KDYH WR VHH LI LW¡V RN ZLWK P\ JLUOIULHQG

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Now, I hate to say it, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not XQFRPPRQ IRU PHQ WR ORVH LQWHUHVW in their partners after a while. If WKDW¡V ZKHUH WKLQJV DUH KHDGHG LW¡V EHVW WR HQG LW QRZ EHIRUH DQ\ PRUH GDPDJH LV GRQH

SeĂąor, I have been with my boyfriend for nearly a year and everything was perfect up until now. Over the course of the relationship I have gained a few pounds, since I have become more comfortable in myself with him around, and now he has basically asked me to lose weight! He tuts when I suggest ordering Chinese and even suggested we just have salad for dinner the other night! I am perfectly happy in my size and I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know what to do next.

7KH Ă&#x20AC;UVW WKLQJ \RX PLJKW ZDQW WR GHWHUPLQH LV ZKHWKHU RU QRW \RXU ER\IULHQG LV FRQFHUQHG DERXW \RXU health. If itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s something as simple DV WKDW WKHQ KH¡V D JRRG PDQ LI perhaps a little naĂŻve. ,I KRZHYHU LW¡V PRUH WR GR ZLWK DHVWKHWLFV WKDQ \RXU ZHOO EHLQJ \RX PLJKW ZDQW WR VWRS DQG WKLQN about where your relationship is JRLQJ ,I \RX¡UH FRPIRUWDEOH ZLWK \RXU ERG\ DQG \RXU ZHLJKW WKHQ QRQH RI WKDW VKRXOG PDWWHU WR KLP

SeĂąor, I have been cheating on my boyfriend with my ex for about a month now. While I do care about him, I never really got over my ex and now I am stuck lying to him while I sneak off and see a man I know isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t good for me. What should I do? ,I \RX NQRZ KH¡V QR JRRG IRU \RX WKHQ \RX QHHG WR VWRS VHHLQJ \RXU H[ LPPHGLDWHO\ 7KHQ \RX QHHG WR WHOO \RXU ER\IULHQG ZKDW¡V EHHQ JRLQJ RQ DQG VHHN KLV IRUJLYHQHVV (LWKHU \RXU ER\IULHQG ZLOO WDNH \RX EDFN WKRXJK KLV WUXVW LQ \RX ZLOO EH WDUQLVKHG IRU D ZKLOH LI QRW IRU JRRG RU KH¡OO HQG WKH UHODWLRQVKLS $V IRU WKH H[ WKH RQO\ WKLQJ WKDW FDQ FRPH IURP LW LV SHUKDSV DQRWKHU PRQWK RI ERRW\ FDOOV DQG WKHQ QRWKLQJ 'RQ¡W OHW \RXUVHOI EH XVHG WKLQN EDFN RQ WKLV VLWXDWLRQ DQG UHPHPEHU WR QHYHU JHW LQYROYHG ZLWK \RXU H[HV DW DOO

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

19

Sex & Relationships Life & Style

View Askew

your valentine’s day

7UDIÀF OLJKWV JLYH WKH JR DKHDG 1

2

3

4

Life and Style Editor Larisa Brown takes on two likely lads at the same time: Ben & Jerry

Katy Lawson indulges in retail therapy to overcome singledom on Valentine’s Day

Rosie Tallant wasn’t whisked off to Paris but simply wants to cook up some love

Unfortunately Katherine Bannon can’t score on or off the pitch

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Self esteem Kathy Jackman Columnist

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20

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Life & Style Travel

travel On the road to Marrakesh Every year hundreds of students hitch to Morocco or Prague for charity.

Life & Style Editor Alex Felton describes how he faired on his own journey

T

ired and sunburnt with the midday sun beating down on our heads, I looked across to my upbeat travel buddy and asked roughly how long we had been standing on the side of the scorched dual carriageway for. ´2QO\ DERXW Ă&#x20AC; YH DQG D KDOI KRXUV mateâ&#x20AC;? came the reply.

Turning my head to the skies I wondered why we had thought this ZDV D JRRG LGHD LQ WKH Ă&#x20AC; UVW SODFH DV our water bottles lay there at the bottom of our bags, tragically empty.

Suddenly a car screamed past us, slammed on the breaks hard and began to reverse up the road towards our desperate faces.

We ran fast down the road towards the clapped out van and climbed into the vacant seats, throwing our bags into the back, and thanking him with all our hearts. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Where are you going?â&#x20AC;? she asked through her thick French accent.

We looked at each other and came out with the reply we gave every lift that we were offered: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Marrakesh!â&#x20AC;?

From there we continued south towards the coast of Spain, although it would take us several more hitches

to reach it and then some from the port of Tangiers to the Moroccan haven that is the city of Marrakesh.

The Hitch to Morocco was a simple exercise and very basic in its objectives.

Travel alongside a friend and without using any form of paid transport, hitch-hike from England either to Marrakesh or Prague and raise as much money as possible for charity.

The mileage didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t scare me as on a map it doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t seem that far away.

But when standing by the roadside in the beautiful hills of Murcia in 6SDLQ ZLWK QR WUDIĂ&#x20AC; F RQ HLWKHU VLGH of the road for an hour or so, you begin to second guess and wonder why on earth you thought that it would be a good idea at all.

The trip from London down to Marrakesh was easily one of the longest fortnights Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve endured.

The characters that you meet throughout this expedition down the west coast of Europe are remarkable.

A select few you wish you could ERWWOH XS DQG Ă&#x20AC; QDOO\ WKDQN ZLWK the immense generosity that they had shown you even for a couple of hours in their air-conditioned car,

others you would happily never encounter again, without question.

Two examples spring to the forefront of my mind. $V ZH ERWK Ă XQJ RXUVHOYHV LQWR the little Seat Ibiza that had grinded to a halt on the scorching tarmac beside us in the town of Girona in Catalonia, there was a sense that this could be the lift that would get us adequately further down the road.

Due to the supposed restriction of hitch-hiking on the Spanish autoVWUDGD ZH ZHUH FRQĂ&#x20AC; QHG WR WKH grind of the A-road down the east coast of Spain which was exceptionally painful.

As our new host sped down the road to his next destination, which we couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t decipher in between meagre puffs on his cigarette, he sped weaving in and out of the cars and trucks in front.

Suddenly the little car swung around a bend at 90 km/h and ventured onto the other side of the road for a brief stint and our Polish host ZLWK KLV OHIW KDQG FODVSHG Ă&#x20AC; UPO\ around his â&#x20AC;&#x153;girlfriendsâ&#x20AC;? right thigh, opened his door and screamed â&#x20AC;&#x153;Puta! Puta!â&#x20AC;? at the prostitutes parading themselves on the roadside.

Both my travel buddy and I looked

at each other wide-eyed but eeked out a nervous laugh. The other option would have been tears.

However, for every crazed Polish driver screaming at unsuspecting prostitutes trying to put food on the table, there is a special Don Gregorio.

As we waited south of Valencia for a lift, a 4X4 pulled up alongside.

Once again exhausted, we clambered inside our next carriage, stared at by a man in his late 60s with a cigar in one hand and the steering wheel in the other.

With no English and our limited Spanish, he drove us six long hours south to his farm house in the middle of nowhere, somewhere in the vicinity of Almeria. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Don Gregorioâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; as we affectionately nicknamed our host insisted we stay at his house, wash and eat

DURXQG KLV Ă&#x20AC; UHSODFH A widower who lived alone with only his beloved dogs, cats, chickens and a couple of turkeys, he welcomed us into his home and we drank rioja and ate jamon into the early hours before we had to push on towards the coast and our crossing into Africa.

The Hitch to Marrakesh gave me the memory of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Don Gregorioâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and his immense kindness.

Looking back, if I can live to be half the man that he was then Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be content. The people that youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll meet on the trek to your destination are the real reason behind the trip.

The world is full of generosity and kindness: the Hitch lets you rub noses with a select few of them for a week or so and therefore it is necessary for everyone to venture on and stick out your left thumb.

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

21

Hot under the collar: Olivia Mason meets The Chippendales Culture Editor: Alice Vincent - courier.culture@ncl.ac.uk

> Arts, page 25

Charlie Brooker: the face of todayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s journalism? $V WKH SURĂ&#x20AC; OH RI WKH Guardian FROXPQLVW DQG %%& SUHVHQWHU FRQWLQXHV WR ULVH &XOWXUH ZULWHUV EDWWOH LW RXW %URRNHU ORYH KLP RU ORDWKH KLP"

Love Joe Cooper All hail Charlton â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Charlieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Brooker; journalist, comic writer, satirist and general miserable bastard. Or just piss off, which is probably what heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d prefer you to do.

Chances are the toad faced grump has bothered your retina in the past year or so, probably moaning/sneering/savagely laying into something/someone.

Brooker recently joined David Mitchell to make the geekiest team yet on â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Big Fat Quiz of the Yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

Like an angry slightly autistic kid, they may not have made many friends, but they had the best jokes. ,I WKDW ZDV \RXU Ă&#x20AC; UVW HQFRXQWHU \RX were probably wondering who the hell he was and how the hell he got there.

Charlie Brooker cut his journalistic teeth on PC Zone magazine in the mid-90s after failing (like all great bums) to complete a media studies degree at the then polytechnic of central London.

Here he honed his many talents, pushed the boundaries and generally pissed about, writing a comic strip entitled â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Cybertwatsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;; a column â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Sick Notesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; insulting anyone who wrote in to the magazine; and surreal one-off doodles - one of which resulted in the magazine being pulled from the shelves.

He later produced website â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;TVGoHomeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, a caustic but hilariously funny spoof of television and TV listing magazines. Brilliantly written, it satirised the banality, barrel-scraping and sheer idiocy of TV media and celebrity culture. Regular features included

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Daily Mail Islandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; in which people stranded on a desert island were only allowed access to the Mail resulting in increasingly irrational and bizarre behaviour and â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Mick Hucknallâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pink Pancakesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; in which Hucknall would routinely press his testicles against various transparent surfaces.

TVGoHome also gave birth to Brookerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s twisted creation Nathan Barley, a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;perpetually solvent, trend-hopping, upper-middle-class London media fuckchestâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, later to feature in a Channel 4 sitcom cowritten with Chris Morris.

Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s continued with his own special brand of telly â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;critiqueâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; ever since, writing a column, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Screen Burnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; for the Guardian and transferring his style on to BBC4â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Screenwipe in 2006. Basically Char-

lie sat at home in his living room playing clips from mainstream and obscure television and cutting back to him delivering witty critiques and his trademark barbed humour.

Other telly highlights include writing for the controversial Brass Eye â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Paedophiliaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; special and scripting E4s Bafta nominated â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Dead Setâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

For me though, one of his greatest achievements has to be current BBC4 show â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Newswipeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

Full of the usual acerbic wit and vitriol, it is also a brilliantly informative deconstruction of the modern new media. Hilarious and educational? You donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get that very often.

Check out his recent clip, a parody of news reporting clichĂŠs from Newswipe which, in only

a few weeks, has become one of YouTubeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s top rated videos of all time! Long live Brooker! Now â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Go Away!â&#x20AC;&#x2122;

Loathe Michael Wynn Ever since the unfortunate incidence of Charlie Brooker being forced upon my eyes and ears I have held something against the man that can only be described as unconditional hatred.

Basically, all Brooker does is slate the banality of television that we all watch on a day to day basis in a way that appeals only to the pre-

tentious Guardian readers. Hence the reason his show is on late night, BBC4, because nobody wants to watch it!

I hate to say this but, Harry Hillâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s TV burp does everything that Charlie Brookerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Screenwipe does, and more.

He has props, he has laughs and he has a prime time slot. Brookerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s humour does not appeal to everyone. , Ă&#x20AC; QG KH SUHVHQWV HYHU\WKLQJ LQ a manner of Victor Meldrew and other grumpy old men that we SUHWHQG WR ORYH EXW Ă&#x20AC; QG LQFUHG ibly boring, incredibly quickly. He speaks in a demeaning voice about a subject matter that my Gran could HYHQ Ă&#x20AC; QG IDXOWV ZLWK DQG WKLQNV LW¡V pioneering.

Perhaps itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s some form of postironic-post-modern-post-One Foot In The Grave art form that only selected people are supposed to â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;getâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. So he is a pretentious grumpy old man. Gathered. $QRWKHU WKLQJ LQ ZKLFK , Ă&#x20AC; QG XW terly tripe about the man is the way he perches himself on the edge of his â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Barker and Stonehouseâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; overly worn Sofa, laptop out ready to blog all the stuff he thinks is utter hilarity whilst his dedicated number of fans sit and do the same. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s yet DQRWKHU DVSHFW , Ă&#x20AC; QG DZIXO DERXW him.

We can all do what he does, group of mates, few beers and slate Big Brother and its demographic and educational importance.

It is not something that is hard, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s something that has been done to death.

He would be the worst man to watch something with. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Oh donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t put that on, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s one of those tele shows that the Proles watchâ&#x20AC;?. Pathetic Brooker.

And for a man who seems to have all the television answers Brooker writes E4â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Dead Setâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, a pathetic cross between â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Big Brotherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Dawn Of The Deadâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. With a man as opinionated as he is, I was exSHFWLQJ D QHZ Âś2IĂ&#x20AC; FH¡ D QHZ IRUP RI FXOWXUDO VLJQLĂ&#x20AC; FDQFH LQ %ULWLVK Television History, not a hybrid of two things that have ran their course.

If you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even match those that screen write Charlie B then how can you Screenwipe?

Literature unleashed as Newcastle students get poetic University for many offers the chance to develop interests with like minded people, allowing them to take a place in your social life as well as perhaps shaping and helping your future plans in life.

Before coming to university, poetry was something I read on the page frequently and occasionally in secret penned a few lines myself as every teenage girl does Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m sure.

But in Newcastle poetry is no longer a thing to keep quiet about, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s something to make a performance of, something to enjoy and

something which is making quite a name for itself in the city.

Having attended numerous poetry events DW Ă&#x20AC; UVW RXW RI DQ REOLJD tion to support a friend), the talent that is present in the young poets is undeniable. Some poetry proving to be serious, heart felt and autobiographical; others amusing tales of sexual exploits.

At Newcastle University, the student who created Pints & Poetry has been going from strength to strength. On their Facebook page they advertise themselves by the

claim that â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Poetryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not just for old bearded men who wear woolly jumpers and smoke pipes, or old women who wear silk scarves and suffocating perfume. No.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; Poetry is in fact for everyone. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d have to be inclined to agree with this statement. Although an obviously literary crowd frequents such events, that isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t to say they are just English students. Instead people from all disciplines appear to appreciate the skill of these young poets as well as the bravery involved in standing and reading aloud your private

creations â&#x20AC;&#x201C; I for one couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t do it.

And it isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just a Newcastle student event, the invitation is open to anyone under 25 with a creative passion, meaning people from Northumbria are just as welcome and the same goes with Newcastle students reading at recent Northumbria lead events.

Aside from these spoken word events, for those less inclined at performance the recently revived Alliterate magazineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s is out now. Set up out of a student passion for creative writing, it features in it a selection

of poetry, short stories and art. The greatest thing about both of these and many other events taking place is the absence of elitism â&#x20AC;&#x201C; anyone can submit work to be published or read. With such an open and welcoming community, it is unsurprising that the poetry scene in Newcastle keeps going from strength to strength.

With the next Pints & Poetry on March 9, it might just be inspiration enough to take up my pen again.

Polly Randall

my newcastle

This February sees the fourth anniversary of one of Newcastleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most popular and successful student club nights, World Headquartersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; monthly Inertia.

With its mix of live music, guest and resident DJs, and a huge variety of musical genres and styles, Inertia is an eclectic, diverse yet dependably brilliant night out, with recent editions featuring a live dubstep act, an instrumental prog-rock group, drum and bass DJs and a soul-funk band.

Run by students, for students (â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;a labour of loveâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, says organiser Katie Sheinman), itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s affordable for even those of us on the tightest of budgets, with entry starting from a measly ÂŁ3, a true bargain for the quality of music and atmosphere on offer. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;People expect high quality and low prices.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; With World Headquartersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; reputation of being the North Eastâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s best alternative, independent venue, Inertia FHUWDLQO\ Ă&#x20AC;WV WKH ELOO RI ZKDW WKLV JUHDW venue has to offer.

Following Januaryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s special edition featuring DJ Zinc, Inertia returns on Thursday 25th February with special guest James Blake, a critically hyped dubstep/RnB artist, whose distorted basslines and off-tuned synths are destined to become renowned across GDQFHĂ RRUV HYHU\ZKHUH Further guests are LaFaro, a Northern-Irish punk-rock band, bringing their noisy, heavy, riff-based tunes to WHQâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s incredible soundsystem.

If that wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t enough, three of Inertiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s resident DJs, including founders Sully and Tim Shaw, will also be spin-

WHQ, Thursday

Inertia

THE COURIER Monday 15 February 2010

ning vinyls from their genre-hopping collections. Yes â&#x20AC;&#x201C; thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s two live acts and three DJs for a puny ÂŁ3!

And this month also sees Inertia no longer restricted to the upstairs of the YHQXH LQVWHDG WDNLQJ RYHU ERWK Ă RRUV to provide surely the biggest and best party of the month. :LWK WKLV EHLQJ WKH Ă&#x20AC;IWK ,QHUWLD RI WKH academic year, the status of the night has continued to grow from its now four-year-old reputation. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We want to get people talking, get some buzz going â&#x20AC;Ś itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s always been about a love of high quality music.â&#x20AC;?

Inertiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s popularity often packs World Headquarters out to capacity, making the Facebook guestlist an essential asset. Not only does it knock a quid off the entry fee, but for this month 50 names from the guestlist will be selected for free entry.

As well as giving you one of the best value student nights out in Newcastle, \RX FDQ Ă&#x20AC;QG D IUHH GRZQORDGDEOH PS Inertia mixtape from inertiawhq.podomatic.com, providing you with the perfect soundtrack for pre-drinks, certain to get you ready and in the mood for going out.

Anyway you look at it, this monthâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Inertia is certainly not one to be missed.

Music boffs in teams of eight or less can battle it out to win a hamper of alcohol and the title of most knowledgeable music lover. The night will move on to Sam Jacks and Flares for karaoke and free shots. Get warming up your vocal cords, the best karaoke singer wins an iPod nano!

Union Basement, 18:30, ÂŁ3 Wristband

RAGâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Big Fat Music Night

union

ITV1, 21.00 Full preview, page 34

Married, Single, Other

tv

02 Academy, 18.30, ÂŁ14.50

Tom McRae.

Cluny, 20.30, ÂŁ3 Wristband

The Soft Pack, Banjo Or Freakout & Waiting For Night

music

monday

Become a fan of The Courier on Facebook and get latest news updates throughout the week

Have you got a picture that epitomises Newcastle for you? Whether it be your favourite landmark, an artistic shot of the city or just you and your friends on a night out, The Courier wants to see it. Please send your photos through to editor.union@ncl.ac.uk. The best photo of the year will be chosen to be the front cover of the 2010/11 Alternative Prospectus.

by Stephanie Feng

Eldon Square

Head Of Steam, 19.30, ÂŁtbc

Whose Mic Is It Anyway?

The Sage, 19.00, ÂŁ24.50

Sgt Pepperâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Lonely Hearts Club Show

Cumberland Arms, 20.00, ÂŁ5

PRMNT VIBES present: So So Modern

The evolution of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;lady artrockâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, catchy melodies coupled with complex electric guitar sounds makes US guitarist and songwriter Laura Goetz (Golden Ghost) a must see on her trip through Newcastle. Likened to Joanna Newsome and CoCo Rosie to name a few, her whimsical sound and poetical lyrics prove she is both interesting and endearing.

Star and Shadow Cinema, 20.00, ÂŁ5

Golden Ghost, George Thomas & The Owls, Richard Dawson

music

Heaton Perk Cafe, 18.30, free

Heaton Perk Knit Night

arts

tuesday

Union Basement, 12:00, ÂŁ2

RAGgae Afternoon

union

,I \RX¡UH LQWR \RXU KRUURU Ă&#x20AC;OPV WKDQ WKLV GHĂ&#x20AC;QLWHO\ VHHPV ZRUWK D ORRN Promising many psychological twists and turns, you may need to sleep with the light on!

Cumberland Arms, 20.00

Ten by Ten

Morden Tower, 19.00, ÂŁ7.50 adv

Sir Richard Bishop

Newcastle university based Shift 6WDWLF¡V Ă&#x20AC;UVW KHDGOLQH JLJ WKHLU VXFFHVV LQ WKH FLW\ VLQFH WKHLU Ă&#x20AC;UVW JLJ a few months ago marks it out as a must-see.

A Tale of Two Sisters

Tyneside Cinema Bar, 21:00, free

Head of Steam, 20.00, ÂŁ4

Shift Static plus Cold Capital, The Vaudeville Class and Air to Achilles.

music

World Headquarters, 23.00, ÂŁ3-4 See highlighted

Inertiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 4th Birthday

clubbing

<DQJ /LDQ VHHQ DV RQH RI &KLQD¡V Ă&#x20AC;Qest poets, has been in exile since 1989 for reciting against the strictures of the Cultural Revolution. He is joined by his principle translator Brian Holton. A great chance for poetry fans to hear something different.

The Culture Lab, 19.00, ÂŁ4-6

Yang Lian & Brian Holton

The launch of bewitching production, Les Liaisons Dangereuses.

The play deals with two decadent aristocrats who enjoy manipulating those around them in a complex and sadistic game for their own entertainment, until true love throws a spanner in the works.

Neither is prepared for the devastating consequences that jealousy can have. Most recently made into WKH SRSXODU Ă&#x20AC;OP &UXHO ,QWHQWLRQV Laclosâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; scandalous eighteenthcentury novel was adapted tailored into a smart, sexy theatre script by Christopher Hampton. Join us for an evening of seduction, betrayal and revenge.

The Theatre Royal Learning Space, 18.45, ÂŁ6

NUTS presents: Les Liasons Dangereuse

A weekend of comedy, blues, and rock bands washed down with plenty of good food and beer.

ARC Stockton, 11.00

Ale and Arty Beer Festival

arts

thursday

&XOW Ă&#x20AC;OP DQG WUDVK FXOWXUH QLJKW

Star and Shadow Cinema, 19:30,

Mu-Meson Archives Evening

film

World Headquarters, 23.00, ÂŁ6 adv

Rusty Bucket Bay ft Bar 9 (Z-Audio), Borgore (Z-Audio), Heppy J and Square Root

clubbing

Fill in a date form and receive a wrist band. You are then set up with compatible people and sent on a date in town to either As You Like It, Mr Lynch, Nancyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bordello, Baby Lynch or Floritaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s. After your date go to the end venue, Madam Kooâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, for free. Look out for people on campus, in town and on Osborne Road selling date forms. For more details go on the Facebook page â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Teddy Bear Hospital Blind Date 2010â&#x20AC;&#x2122;. All proceeds go to Teddy Bear Hospital and the Childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Heart Foundation

Madame Koo, ÂŁ5

Teddy Bear Hospital Blind Date 2010

charity

The Culture Lab, 19.30, ÂŁ6

NUTS presents: One Flew Over The Cuckooâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Nest

Northern Stage, 19.30, ÂŁ4

First in Three

The Journal Tyne Theatre, 19.30, ÂŁ20 Full preview, page 25

Chippendales: The Ultimate Girls Night Out

arts

wednesday

the guide: 22 february to 28 february

highlighted

Culture

22

23

Channel 4, 22.00 Full preview, page 34

Chris Moyleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Quiz Night

tv

Expect the unexprected! The legendary team react to audience suggestions and participation to create hilarious scenes, sketches and songs that are different and entertaining every time. Addictive and a great laugh.

The Cumberland Arms, 19.30, ÂŁ6-9

The Suggestibles

Hyem, 19.30, ÂŁtbc

The Gads, Odd Shaped Head, These Are Your Friends

Star and Shadow Cinema, 20.00, ÂŁ5

Teutonic Musik

music

To celebrate the 200,000th cinema tickets sold there since it opened, the latest ticket holder got to pick a Ă&#x20AC;OP DQG KH SLFNHG ZHOO $ OHJHQG RI D Ă&#x20AC;OP LW¡V D PXVW LI \RX KDYH QRW already seen it. One of the best war Ă&#x20AC;OPV RXW WKHUH

Tyneside Cinema, 13.45, ÂŁ5

The Great Escape

film

After a seriously sweaty sell-out second birthday in January, Ape-X returns with a lineup to match the clubnightâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s previous efforts. Rapidly becoming one of Newcastleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s best monthly events, get yourself in the queue.

Cosmic Ballroom, 22.30, ÂŁ10

Ape-X: Paul Woolford and Lauhaus

clubbing

Union Society Basement, 18.30, ÂŁ4-5 Full preview, page 24

Tango Festival Launch

Performing Arts Centre, Royal Grammar School, 19.30, ÂŁ8 Full preview, page 24

Gilbert and Sullivan Society present: HMS Pinafore

arts

friday

A ukulele festival! Ukulele acts from all over the world strut their stuff to celebrate the great instrument. MuVLF Ă&#x20AC;OPV ZRUNVKRSV DQG EHHU ZKDW could be better?

Star and Shadow Cinema, 18.00, ÂŁ6.50-10

Ukelear Meltdown III

Informal charity event with lovely tunes for a post-work, pre-party weekend chillout. Refreshments will be provided by vegan specialists The Spanish Bakery - a mere ÂŁ2 will get you a steaming cup of tea and a peanut butter brownie or perhaps a bakewell tart, with all proceeds going to Oxfam.

Oxfam Book Shop, 17.30, free

The Paperback Sessions: Bridie Jackson

Cluny 2, 20.00, sold out

Johnny Flynn

Dark metallers Eastern Front headline this yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s CCFC event, they are joined by Pagan group Wodensthrone who play their Ă&#x20AC;UVW VKRZ VLQFH WKH GHEXW RI WKHLU new album, and Swedish grind act Remasculate will play Newcastle IRU WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW WLPH %RWK DFWV MRLQ DQ already impressive line up including Insision, The Axis of Perdition, Fuck the Facts, Amputated, Dead Beyond Buried and more. All proceeds go to Cancer research UK .

Cluny, 12.00, ÂŁ15

Causing Chaos for Cancer

music

From Warehouse Projectâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 2009 closing party to our very own favourite ballroom, renowned Berlin DJ brothers Tiefschwarz grace Newcastle with their presence. Coupled with the incredibly elusive I-F, and a 5.30am curfew, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going to be a messy one.

Cosmic Ballroom, 22.30, ÂŁtbc

Dada presents: Tiefschwarz + I-F

Newcastle Univesity Basement, 23.00, ÂŁ5

Brighton Beach

clubbing

Trade in your old tat for some glamrags.

Northumbria Studentsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Union, 13.00, ÂŁtbc

Swap Shop

arts

saturday

Following last yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s satisfying victory over bitter rivals Northumbria, Team Newcastle aim to make it an historic three wins in a row as the competition bows out on a Sunday HYHQLQJ IRU WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW WLPH LQ LWV KLVtory.

As always the rugby union menâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Ă&#x20AC;UVWV HQFRXQWHU EULQJV WKH VKRZSLHFH HYHQW WR D FORVH DQG D Ă&#x20AC;UVW IRU Stan Calvert sees the athletics team compete at the stadium on the night, with the 100m sprint taking place at half time. Those who have been before will attest to the enjoyable atmosphere; the streakers, the sport, the poly-bashing. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all in the name of fun and there will be a host of faPLOLDU IDFHV ERWK RQ DQG RII WKH Ă&#x20AC;HOG for you to rejoice with.

There is plenty more to enjoy at Gateshead before the rugby union Ă&#x20AC;QDOH KRZHYHU VR PDNH VXUH \RX get down early to catch the rugby OHDJXH VHFRQGV DQG Ă&#x20AC;UVWV (17.00) in action, as well as more athletics. There is also plenty on offer inside the impressive complex with basketball, badminton and volleyball Ă&#x20AC;[WXUHV WDNLQJ SODFH DV ZHOO DV DOO four netball games, with Newcastleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Ă&#x20AC;UVW WHDP LQ ZLWK D UHDO VKRW RI XSVHWing Northumbriaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Super League contingent.

Tickets cost just ÂŁ4 and Gateshead Stadium can be found on the Metro of the same name. It promises to be a momentous occasion and one well

Gateshead Stadium, 19.00, ÂŁ4

Stan Calvert Cup Ă&#x20AC;QDO HYHQWV

sport

The Cluny, 19.00, ÂŁ6

Surface Unsigned Festival: Radio Dynamics, Room 51, SS Arcadia, Remedy, 98 Pages

music

sunday

Listings by Ciara Littler, Olivia Mason and Kate Rogers - send your listings to courier.culture@ncl.ac.uk

Culture

24

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Culture Arts

arts comedy

Ha-ha’way the lads!

Charlotte Loftus gets under the skin of the city’s week-long comedy festival There’s fun to be had in the Toon this week, with the revival of the Newcastle Gateshead Comedy festival, which starts this Monday.

After an absence of several years, festival organiser Warren Speed is delighted that the festival is back in Newcastle. ‘I feel privileged to be able to play such a central role in the return of the festival.

‘Historically, the Newcastle Comedy Festival was second only to the Edinburgh festival in terms of size and national awareness, and that's where I would eventually love us to get back to.’

With this year’s large and diverse selection of top rated comedians, all of whom have descended on venues around Newcastle for your viewing pleasure, it seems that Warren could achieve his dream.

Many of this year’s performers are fresh from acclaimed runs at the Edinburgh Festival.

Already tipped as the pick of the fest is Lee Fenwick, with his comedy creation Mick Sergeant.

Touted as the next Steve Coogan, Fenwick presents Mick Sergeant, a Geordie former shipyard worker who schemes to win back estranged wife Donna. So convincing is Fenwick’s performance that audiences have been left convinced that Sergeant is real.

For those who want more from their comedians, 2010 offers something a little different, such as this year’s festival opener Cabaret Excentrique at the Sage Gateshead.

This extravaganza includes bur-

More than a barrel of laughs: Mick Sergeant and Desmond O’Connor, both performing at the Newcastle Gateshead Comedy Festival

lesque, circus, dance, magic, acrobatics, aerial trapeze, music and belly dancing, all mixed in with a dash of comedy.

Surely a spectacle not to be missed!

If you prefer your comedy outrageous, then check out Robert Temple, an X-rated comedy hypnotist; whose act includes ‘The Orgasm Shotgun’ and ‘The Sex Factor!’; and

Chris Cross, the bad-boy comedy magician, contortionist and escapologist, who presents magic as you’ve never seen it before.

Wednesday sees an hour-long show from Chris Ramsey, one of the rising stars of the UK stand-up circuit.

This hotly-tipped newcomer has been nominated for two major comedy awards, and has supported Al

Murray, Lee Mack, Russell Howard, Russell Kane and Stephen K. Amos.

For those who consider themselves comedy connoisseurs, you would be mad to miss this fantastic opportuQLW\ WR EH DPRQJVW WKH ÀUVW WR VHH Chris’ debut solo show.

The festival is student-friendly in every way, with tickets starting from £10 to see two shows in some cases; and with the use of a variety of lo-

cal venues, including As You Like It in Jesmond and Reds Bar in Northumbria University, you can enjoy a night of top comedy with minimum effort and expense.

The only question is, are you up for a laugh?

For full line-up, ticket and booking information, tickets start from £10.

stage

dance

All aboard Pinafore as society sets sail for RGS

Tang-tastic

Lucy Johnson on the Gilbert and Sullivan society’s latest offering

Put on your dancing shoes because Newcastle University’s Tango Society have co-organised a three-day Tango festival in the heart of Newcastle!

Running in venues across the city, students are invited to come along and watch world-class famous tango dancers from Buenos Aires, and even participate in tango beginners classes and workshops themselves!

Festival events include milongas (social dancing) as well as a Tango Fair which hosts live tango music, stalls, refreshments and the Tango Competition.

If, come the end of February, you need a break from work or just fancy a good giggle at the theatre, why not take some time out and head to Gilbert and Sullivan Society’s production of HMS Pinafore.

It’s a snip at only £8 a throw, and for those of you who live in Jesmond, it’s practically on your doorstep at the Royal Grammar School.

For those of you who are not so well-informed on your comic operas, HMS Pinafore is one of Gilbert and Sullivan’s best known works.

The performance tells the story of the forbidden love between the ship

captain’s daughter Josephine, and Ralph, a lowly sea hand.

Unfortunately for Josephine, her father intends her to marry the First Lord of the Admiralty Sir Joseph Porter. This theme of love between GLIIHUHQW VRFLDO FODVVHV LV UHÁHFWHG LQ the fondness between Captain Corcoran and Mrs. Cripps, a common bumboat woman.

Ralph and Josephine conspire to elope, but upon being discovered all seems at a loss. That is until a surprise revelation turns everything on its head.

The Newcastle University Gilbert and Sullivan Society (NUGSS) is one of the oldest student societies in the University, established way back in 1952. Each year in the spring term, the society performs one of the fourteen comic operas created by W. S.

Gilbert and Arthur Sullivan.

If this does spark off a liking for musicals, during the summer the society also runs a smaller summer production, often an original libretto set to music by Gilbert and Sullivan and other composers of the Victorian and Edwardian period.

NUGSS has a number of social events that include trips to see productions by local groups that often contain former members of NUGSS as well as professional productions.

If you’re inspired by the production, or you fancy your moment in the limelight, the society welcomes anyone who wishes to join, either as a member of the cast or to help out with production and backstage.

The production is also studentproduced, with Richard Temperley directing and Mark Edwards as Mu-

sical Director.

The cast is also made up of Newcastle University students – so if \RX·UH D ÀUVW \HDU PXVLF RU DUWV VWXdent, you may particularly enjoy it.

The production, although priced modestly, is staged in a well equipped theatre in which to perform, with an accompanying orchestra containing some of the region's most talented musicians and a cast of enthusiastic students.

HMS Pinafore is one of many works

by Gilbert and Sullivan, including The Pirates of Penzance and The Mikado.

If you’re a fan of these classics, it’s likely that the night’s performance will be very much to your liking.

HMS Pinafore runs from 25 February to 27 February at RGS Jesmond

The Tango Festival runs from 26 February-28 February. Tickets can be bought at www.uktangocompetition.com Stephanie Ferrao Arts Editor

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

25

Arts Culture Arts Editor: Stephanie Ferrao - courier.culture-arts@ncl.ac.uk

interview

You can leave your hat on Olivia Mason talks groupies and Vegas with with one of the world-famous Chippendales Hearing The Chippendales are coming to Newcastle is a very exciting prospect. It is not often we get to see one of Las Vegasâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s best ladiesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; entertainment show.

With this in mind, interviewing one of The Chippendales, Kevin, was somewhat of a delight.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not every day you get to speak to an incredibly toned American man. He had that smooth U.S. drawl thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lovely on the ears and despite communication barriers (my Glaswegian accent isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t always the easiest for Americanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s to decipher), I got WR Ă&#x20AC;QG RXW D OLWWOH ELW PRUH DERXW WKH world of The Chippendales.

Firstly, I wanted to know how he was enjoying Britain. He explained that the weather is a bit colder but being here since the start of February, they have had some time to adjust to the climate and British crowds now.

Asking how shows in Britain compare to Las Vegas, Kevin explains the shows in Britain are a bit different, taking a whole evening compared to Las Vegas where it is a starter for the night out.

So are women more forward here or in America?

He diplomatically says they are different: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Here women like to get in to the show more, it seems to be more of a novelty.â&#x20AC;?

I tell him when he comes to Newcastle there will be plenty of women wearing very little too - he seems delighted!

I asked if he has any groupies and learn that some women come to every show and follow the tour religiously. â&#x20AC;&#x153;This doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t bother us though and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s nice getting to meet some of them.â&#x20AC;?

Only once has Kevin had an over eager fan with one woman trying to FOLPE LQ KLV URRP YLD WKH Ă&#x20AC;UH HVFDSH which was a bit scary Kevin admits.

The most amusing story is how Kevin initially became a Chippendale; all men are obviously not born one. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It was my mom; she went to one of the shows and came back and told me I had to go in for it.

â&#x20AC;&#x153;I auditioned and luckily they were looking for a guy with long hair so I got the job.â&#x20AC;?

It must be good having your mum so supportive then. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I guessâ&#x20AC;? he agreed.

The auditioning process proved to be a tough one and with only 25 Chippendales worldwide, things can get very competitive he tells me, but there is not too much rivalry between the boys on tour. â&#x20AC;&#x153;You do sometimes look at one of the guys though and go â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;I need to bulk upâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;!â&#x20AC;? :LWK VXFK D SK\VLTXH , Ă&#x20AC;JXUHG Kevin must be an expert at wooing the female population and must have some tips for the ladies.

Kevin confesses heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a pretty shy guy but guesses heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in the right job as women always come to him.

The only tip he can give girls is to be themselves, as so many he meets are trying to be someone else.

As the interview came to a close, I just had to ask Kevin what his shoe size is. He laughs and replies â&#x20AC;&#x153;size 11!â&#x20AC;?

The Chippendales will be playing at the Journal Tyne Theatre in Newcastle on February 24, which will surely be a show worth a visit.

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m too sexy: The Chippendales get set to perform at the Journal Tyne Theatre

art

Music to your eyes: taking you back to the swinging sixties The Laing Galleryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s latest exhibition is a must for music fans reports Polly Randall The sixties was a decade of massive social and cultural change. Britain became the central focus of a revolution in the musical world and the impact from this era has been felt ever since.

This major exhibition records and catalogues through photography and other memorabilia the evolving face of the music scene over the

period.

Having just completed a hugely successful run at the National Portrait Gallery in London, the quality of this exhibition was always assured, but the sheer expansiveness of the work on show was surprising.

7KDW LW PDQDJHG WR Ă&#x20AC;W LQWR WKH /DLQJ (not the largest of galleries in Newcastle), was quite a feat.

When entering the gallery, the exhibition follows a linear pattern around the two rooms, the years FOHDUO\ GHĂ&#x20AC;QHG DQG H[SODLQHG IURP the young fresh faced Beatles in Fiona Adamâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s shot for the cover of the Twist and Shout EP to the bearded selves in later years, to the cover

of their last album Abbey Road in 1969.

Not only is it interesting to see a face mature before your eyes, but these works also demonstrate how their iconic status was created through the decade, from a group of friends full of irrepressible hope and vitality to becoming idols to many.

Aside from The Beatles, of course there is a plethora of singers and bands from the era, the prominence of female singers from Cilla Black to Lulu also feature heavily, showing that music was no longer only a manâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s game.

Likewise, whilst the portraits are of both well known and less recog-

nisable acts, at least according to my slight knowledge of the 60s music scene, the photographers also follow this pattern.

The instantly recognisable image of Mick Jagger by David Bailey and group shots by John French sit alongside work by Fiona Adams who until recently had not been credited for some of her work.

The director of the National Portrait Gallery stated that this exhibitionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s central message is â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;about how music changed the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and this is shown not only through the 150 portraits but in the various ephemera that is situated around the gallery.

To a musical hoarder such as myself, this collection of past magazines, posters, gig tickets and album covers is just as interesting as the photos on the wall; the archives of any teenage boyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bedroom from the decade have well and truly been raided.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s great to see an exhibition as enjoyable and prominent as this featuring at one of our local galleries, DQG ZKHQ , YLVLWHG LW ZDV GHĂ&#x20AC;QLWHO\ not short on visitors.

On until April 18, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a major recommendation to anyone who likes the music from this period, but realO\ PRVW SHRSOH ZLOO Ă&#x20AC;QG VRPHWKLQJ of intrigue in this collection.

Window exhibition swings a punch at the credit crunch Chances are youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve already seen it, or at the very least passed it by; CRUNCH! the new art exhibition is located inside and outside of the Monument Mall shopping centre in the old Boots store.

Using shop windows as canvas, the display takes a sardonic look at life in the recession in a comic book style of delivery.

The culmination of a participatory arts project, the exhibition involved over 120 participants working with playwright Lee Mattinson and co-

creator of Viz comics, Simon Donald to produce their own creative responses to the credit crunch.

If the topic sounds a little gloomy, be assured that the art itself is not.

Humorous, sharp and with a keen sense of the surreal, CRUNCH! is clearly a project that aims to uplift.

In the exhibition directorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s own words; â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;[we wanted to] brighten up the recession hit high street whilst delivering an important message about resilienceâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

Some of the inventive money-sav-

ing devices sketched out in the gallery include knitted ipod jumpers ('because all the kids want them'), along with hamster powered vehicles.

Against this tongue and cheek approach, there is some gesturing towards the more serious roots and consequences of the credit crunch.

One window criticises the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;backstabbing mediaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, whilst another makes the point; â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t stealâ&#x20AC;Ś unless youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re the governmentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

Yet overall the voice of the project

seems rooted in how economic downturn affects everyday events for everyday people.

The location of the exhibition cerWDLQO\ UHĂ HFWV WKLV %\ LQFOXGLQJ WKH exhibition in a high street setting, contemporary art is made available to a broad audience, and in particular, to those who will have felt the effects of a recession most acutely.

The wide accessibility of CRUNCH! ties in nicely with the broad range of input that went into it.

Volunteers for the project ranged

from local school children aged 13 to a 67 year old retired pensioner, proving that art can and should be an inclusive experience.

The exhibition comes to a close on January 25, so make sure that next time youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re around town you take the opportunity to have a closer look.

Whether you are a budding art critic or art dunce, CRUNCH! is looking to you as its prime audience.

Rosamund Fraser

24

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Culture Arts

arts reviews Fine Cell Work Hall 1, The Sage 10 February

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Instead of smashing up your cell you can channel your aggression in a positive way. I usually spend about two to three hours an evening doing tapestry work. It helps you realize there are alternatives to committing crime.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; Not every exhibition comes with the promise of being hand-crafted by prison inmates, or of promoting social change, or even just of supporting a charity - but Fine Cell Work at the Sage was no ordinary exhibition.

The above quote comes from Pete at HMP Albany, one of many inmates taught needlework by the charity Fine Cell Work, which then employs them to produce designer goods such as cushions, handbags and quilts.

Some might object to the idea of convicted criminals being used as a cheap source of labour, but the skills developed by inmates can provide a lifeline to the outside world and aid in their rehabilita-

The Lady Vanishes Journal Tyne Theatre 15 February

From the original novel by Ethal Lina White and made a classic by Alfred Hitchcockâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 1938 adaptation, The Lady Vanishes is a fast-paced comedy thriller that promised to be

Road

Hanger 51 13 February NU Theatre Societyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s production of Road by Jim Cartwright, can best be described as a 1980â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s version of Channel 4â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Shameless.

The story is narrated by a Frank Gallagher type character named Scullery, who everyone on the street knows and interacts with.

Scullery, played by Luc Marot, takes you down the street and introduces the audience to all the different characters that live along it.

It is an interesting political insight into the minds of the people suffering or dealing with the pressures of the time with a contrast between ages, gender, economic or family situation.

The actors used the very basic set fantastically and the stage team worked extremely hard manoeuvring it. The play was well structured episodically, boasting pace and energy with fascinatingly believable characters, so that the audience easily understood their

tion, as well as providing a small source of income that can make the difference between getting an extra phone call back home or not.

Once taught the necessary skills by a team of volunteers, the inmates produce patterns drawn up by the likes of Jasper Conran, Celia Birtwell and Cath Kidston.

The involvement of such top designers, plus a handful of celebrities like Boris Johnston, Mick Jagger and Vinnie Jones (whose design LV Ă&#x20AC; WWLQJO\ WZR VPRNLQJ VKRWJXQ barrels), elevates the products from cute, handmade sympathy buys to genuinely desirable objects of fashion.

Browsing the tables covered with cushions, the Sage's Fine Cell Work instalment feels less an exhibition, more a travelling crafts show.

The designs range from crossstitched Elvises to collaged Union Jacks, and while some would not look out of place in Ikea, there are some gems such as the "Ship Tattoo" design.

Each product's price tag also contains the name of the inmate who laboured over it, and the prison they reside.

The charity encourages buyers to send thank-you letters to inmates for their hard work, although a reminder in the promotional matefull of surprises when The Journal Tyne Theatre brought it to stage this February. :KLOVW VHW LQ Ă&#x20AC; FWLRQDO FRXQWU\ %DQ drika, the story takes place during the very real threat of World War 2, LQ D VRFLHW\ RQ WKH FXVS RI FRQĂ LFW But donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t let that fool you, this is no grim war story when an unusual cast of characters are thrown together in even more unusual circumstances with comical consequences.

We join Iris, a young woman lives and problems.

This was particularly the case for Angus Sutherland, as Joey, and Dani Canlliere, Clare, who together DWWHPSWHG WR Ă&#x20AC; QG D UHYHODWLRQ WR make sense of their destructive lives. These characters were both brilliantly portrayed and held the audienceâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s attention without the need for humour, which was a key feature of many of the other scenes.

Charlotte Bryan also deserves the greatest respect for creating the funniest moment of the play, by demonstrating that her character, Helen, would not give up on getting with a guy, despite his debatable conscious state.

The performance had a unique twist in the interval where the actors and audience were combined to create a night out â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;onâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t roadâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

The director, Charlotte Cunningham, used ideas of Brechtian theatre to constantly make the audience feel as one with the characters. The VHFRQG KDOI GHĂ&#x20AC; QLWHO\ RXW VKRQH WKH Ă&#x20AC; UVW ZLWK EHWWHU SDFH DQG LPSURYHG acting. Overall, the play was a roller coaster for the audience, taking you from comedy to the harsh reality of the times that made certain scenes hard to watch.

Sally Priddle

Hand-crafted by inmates: Fine Cell Work is a social enterprise that teaches needlework to prison inmates and sells their products

rial advises leaving off a return address: â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;this is not a pen pal!â&#x20AC;&#x2122; Beyond cushions, the charity also oversees the production of neat patchwork handbags and quilts, as well as small knitted products - the majority of which on display were, EDIĂ LQJO\ QDSNLQ ULQJV The centrepiece of the exhibit is a large tapestry piece called Bridging The Gap, depicting a convict sewing in his cell, below a sun surrounded by the word â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;helloâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; in

multiple languages and kites with the words â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;hopeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;musicâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;familyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; in their ropes.

High art it is not, but the work, set to hang in the Sage permanently, was a collaborative effort between groups of convicts and designers that took around three years from its conception.

Its positive message rings true with a charity dedicated to rescuing those that most of society have given up on, by providing them

with a newfound purpose, and by raising its money not through donations, but by producing luxury designer goods that people are willing to spend money on.

With prison populations reaching an all-time high, projects like these are much-needed - and in the case of Fine Cell Work, everyone's a winner.

taking a train ride home after her Ă&#x20AC; QDO KROLGD\ EHIRUH KHU PDUULDJH who meets fellow passenger, old Miss Froy who claims to have been working abroad as a governess.

The two begin an ordinary friendship, without strange occurrences or curious plot twists; that is until Miss Froy goes missing aboard the moving train.

A little like the premise of Flightplan, only this proves funnier with better costumes and some good old-fashioned espionage thrown in

for good measure. Added to that, a dash of romance in the form of young Gilbert who helps Irisâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; investigations and The Lady Vanishes plays out as a sleekly-produced thriller.

Any Dr Who fans will have recognised Davros, creator of the Daleks otherwise known as Terry Molloy, who took to the stage as the enigmatic Dr. Egon Hartz, another of the eccentric characters who add to the ever-twisting storyline.

In fact, the whole stage was

brought to life with the enthusiasm of the actors who really captured the essence of what made HitchFRFN¡V Ă&#x20AC; OP VXFK D VXFFHVV Ă&#x20AC; UVW WLPH around.

There wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t a moment to wonder about the decorations of the theatre or who was wearing a wig or not like most other plays on for more than an hour, because audiences were kept in suspense with some mystery or another left to be solved.

WR WKHLU IUR]HQ VHDWV XQWLO WKH Ă&#x20AC; QDO lines had been uttered.

As Antonio Salieri, Steven Wallace was spell-binding.

His ability to place dramatic emphasis on every word of the two hour performance kept the audience completely enthralled.

His performance was both humorous and serious depending on the setting of the scene. His stage presence as the jealous maestro, although undoubtedly sinister and disturbingly psychopathic, also attracted the sympathy of the audience as they witnessed his demise through the taunting of the annoying and immature presence of young Mozart.

His confession was portrayed ZLWK VXFK FRPSDVVLRQ DQG FRQĂ&#x20AC; dence that it became increasingly hard to distinguish reality from SHUIRUPDQFH DV 6DOLHUL FRQĂ&#x20AC; GHG with the audience his darkest thoughts, sins and ultimately unforgivable crime of murder.

Edward O Burgonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s portrayal of Mozart was cloying yet comical, and an exact dramatic contrast to the serious and calculated portrayal of the protagonist, Salieri.

Although O Burgonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s high pitched laughter became in-

creasingly annoying as the play progressed, his performance was exceptional as the young composer; as a taunting, self-obsessed, immature and unfaithful child prodigy, who giggled and boasted, running around the stage after his lover in a rather shameless fashion.

Although the theatre was unbelievably cold, and the audience had to layer up with hats and scarfs throughout the performance, the entire production was an enormous triumph, with every word drawing the audience further into the plot of mystery, confession and rivalry.

The entire cast threw themselves into the production with such enthusiasm and professional skill, (particularly considering that a fair amount of the script was in ItalLDQ WKDW LW ZDV GLIĂ&#x20AC; FXOW WR IRUJHW that this was an amateur society production.

Amadeus was performed by the cast and produced by the production team of NUTS with skill and GHGLFDWLRQ DQG WKH Ă&#x20AC; QDO UHVXOW ZDV nothing short of a theatrical work of art.

Amadeus Cluny 2 10 February

Wednesday night saw the opening of Newcastle University Theatre societyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s production of Peter Shafferâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Oscar winning Amadeus at the Cluny 2 Theatre in Newcastleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Ouseburn Valley.

Based on the lives of two renowned musicians and composers, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart and Antonio Salieri, Shafferâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s production combines history and Ă&#x20AC; FWLRQ LQ DQ DWWHPSW WR XQUDYHO WKH mystery surrounding the death of Mozart.

Amadeus dramatises the rivalry between the two composers, the building jealousy of Salieri of his young rivalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s increasing popularity and natural talent, in order to draw an answer to the age old question, who killed Mozart?

In a small cold dark theatre, with minimalist scenery and props, the NUTS cast put on a captivating and enchanting performance, which kept the audience riveted

Elliot Bentley

Rachel Hill

Rachel Flint

28

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Culture Film

film comment

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Tyneside Cinema 10 February

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THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

29

Film Culture Film Editor: Frances Kroon - courier.culture-film@ncl.ac.uk

reviews Ponyo Director: Hayao Miyazaki Cast: Cate Blanchett, Noah Cyrus, Matt Damon, Frankie -RQDV /LDP 1HHVRQ 7LQD )H\ Runtime: 100 mins

-DSDQHVH DQLPH Ă&#x20AC; OP FRPSDQ\ Studio Ghibli, and in particular director Hayao Miyazaki, have been gaining recognition on our side of the world for some time now with their incredibly well-drawn animaWLRQV DQG IDQWDVWLFDO VWRULHV 7KLV 0L\D]DNL¡V WK Ă&#x20AC; OP KDV now been recognised as a mainVWUHDP DIIDLU DIWHU KLV ODVW WZR Ă&#x20AC; OPV

Spirited Away and Howlâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Moving Castle, were both nominated for Best Animated Feature Oscars (with Spirited Away winning its year), and Ponyo has deservedly been given screenings in multiplexes across the ODQG Inspired by The Little Mermaid, Ponyo WHOOV WKH VWRU\ RI D Ă&#x20AC; VK JLUO (Noah Cyrus) who, driven by a desire to see the world but prevented by her father, the sea wizard Fujimoto (Liam Neeson), escapes to shore and is found by a young boy, 6ĹźVXNH )UDQNLH -RQDV ZKR QDPHV KHU 3RQ\R After being recaptured by her father, Ponyo tells Fujimoto she has fallen in love with the boy and uses her magic to become a human girl before escaping once more â&#x20AC;&#x201C; putting the balance of earth and sea LQ MHRSDUG\ DW WKH VDPH WLPH

Whilst the story is a compelling IDLU\ WDOH WKH Ă&#x20AC; OP¡V WUXH VWUHQJWK lies in the depth and quality of its LQFUHGLEOH DQLPDWLRQ Using a range of styles throughout, the landscape changes seamlessly from photo realism to beautiful expressionism, making IRU D FRQVWDQWO\ VKLIWLQJ YLHZ Some of the scenes are amongst the most breathtaking animation Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve ever seen, particularly a moment ZKHUH WKH ZDYHV EHFRPH JLDQW Ă&#x20AC; VK which leap across the surface before exploding into foam as they hit the ODQG )RU WKLV UHDVRQ DORQH WKH Ă&#x20AC; OP LV ZRUWK ZDWFKLQJ However, the sound is as perfectly realised, with every ripple and drop of water accounted for DV ZHOO DV D WHUULĂ&#x20AC; F MRE KDYLQJ EHHQ GRQH RQ GXEELQJ WKH Ă&#x20AC; OP I was sceptical of a dubbed ver-

VLRQ RI WKH Ă&#x20AC; OP EHIRUHKDQG EXW WKH VWDU FDVW OHQG WKH Ă&#x20AC; OP D WUXO\ DFWRUO\ quality that never detracts from the H[SHULHQFH DV D ZKROH Some of the Japanese convenWLRQV RI VWRU\WHOOLQJ PD\ EDIĂ H WKH viewer, with important or very odd moments simply glossed over as if they were unimportant, but this is VLPSO\ D FXOWXUH GLIIHUHQFH As a whole Ponyo is not only proof of why Studio Ghibli is becoming revered worldwide, but, alongside Disneyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s newest effort, why the hand-drawn animation of old is still one of the most expresVLYH DQG EHDXWLIXO Ă&#x20AC; OP PHGLXPV WKDW FLQHPD FDQ PXVWHU

Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Day

interests the rosy-red story can EHJLQ WR ZLOW Needless to say there is no risk of a bad ending here but unfortunately with so many different couples Ă LWWLQJ RQ DQG RII WKH VFUHHQ LW LV GLIĂ&#x20AC; FXOW WR FDUH ZKHWKHU DQRWKHU ER\ JHWV WKH JLUO RU QRW Add to that plenty of soppy moments and a few speeches on the SRZHU RI ORYH DQG WKLV LV GHĂ&#x20AC; QLWHO\ PDUNHG RXW DV RQH IRU WKH JLUOV And thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s girls whose investment LQ JRLQJ WR ZDWFK WKH Ă&#x20AC; OP LV EDVHG RQ $VKWRQ .XWFKHU EHLQJ DOO FXWH Overall Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Day is exactly what it describes on the poster; â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;A day in the life of loveâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and all the

cheesy romantic cliches that come ZLWK WKDW Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s got a nice rounded plot, successfully weaving all the little stories into one and everything is NHSW OLJKW KHDUWHG DQG IXQ But critics dubbing it â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;hilariousâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; might have been a little overzealous and girls really wanting to show their boyfriends how much they love them this year, might do them a favour and let them go see Ninja $VVDVVLQ DW WKH FLQHPD LQVWHDG

If you need help getting into to the mushy-gushy mind set for ValenWLQH¡V GD\ WKHQ ZDWFKLQJ WKLV Ă&#x20AC; OP LV D VXUH Ă&#x20AC; UH ZD\ WR GR LW

Starring more celebrities than you can shake a stick at, though understandably to compensate for a EDUHO\ WKHUH SORW WKLV Ă&#x20AC; OP LV UHDOO\ only good if you are wanting a slice of no-fuss entertainment that wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t leave you thinking about it for too ORQJ DIWHUZDUGV It follows the mini narratives of numerous couples on Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s day, all set in the ever sunny disWULFW RI +ROO\ZRRG 7KHUH¡V VRPH pretty sneaky plot twists along the ZD\ WR NHHS \RX RQ \RXU WRHV 6XUSULVLQJO\ 7D\ORU 6ZLIW LV WKH one to bring some much needed comedy to the whole thing, as after WKH Ă&#x20AC; UVW KRXU RI PLVJXLGHG ORYH

and spectacle synonymous with the genre, offering a gripping account of an autistic Muslimâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s struggle with discrimination in post 9/11 $PHULFD Beginning in India, the plot follows Khan (Shahrukh Khan) as an adolescent who, after the death of his mother, moves to San Francisco to work for his brotherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cosmetic FRPSDQ\ After meeting salon owner Mandira (Kajol) the two strike up a close relationship that blossoms into marriage, but following the political repercussions of the 9/11 attacks a shocking tragedy forces Khan on a journey, travelling across $PHULFD WR Ă&#x20AC; QG DQG FRQIURQW WKH SUHVLGHQW

7KH Ă&#x20AC; OP LV XQGRXEWHGO\ HSLF VKRW skilfully by director Karen Johar in the most iconic picturesque cities in America, with set pieces ranging from hurricane engulfed towns to FKDRWLF SROLWLFDO HYHQWV Similarly the plot is an emotional experience with scenes of torture, racism and personal tragedy, consequently exploring the notion of a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;terroristâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and the harsh prejudices generated against Muslims by the %XVK DGPLQLVWUDWLRQ 'HVSLWH WKH relentless antiâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;Americanisms, the real heart of the piece lies with the PDLQ SHUIRUPDQFHV 7KH PHJDVWDU FDVW GRHV QRW GLVDS point, with actor Khan offering a mix of both comedic and dramatic DELOLW\

His portrayal of autism is heartfelt and realistic, producing a character with an everyman quality that is LPSRVVLEOH QRW WR OLNH Inspired by his mother telling him â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;good people do good things,â&#x20AC;&#x2122; he could have been a one dimensional character, but his inability to understand complex human emotion makes him immune from the 9/11 hysteria to emerge as a uniting YRLFH RI UHDVRQ DQG WUXWK Coâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;star Kajol also impresses as a strong female lead, hypnotic as Khanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s love interest and a powerful independent force driven by tragHG\ LQ WKH ODWWHU SDUW RI WKH Ă&#x20AC; OP 2YHUDOO WKH Ă&#x20AC; OP KDV DQ HSLF QDU rative but in some places can be emotionally and politically ma-

nipulative, while also having a lot RI FULQJH ZRUWK\ VRFLDO VWHUHRW\SHV Although the cinematic character Khan can be likened to Forrest Gump or Rainâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;man, Khanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s interSUHWDWLRQ SURMHFWV FRQĂ&#x20AC; GHQFH DQG empathy, immersed completely in the role that has been dubbed the ]HQLWK RI KLV FDUHHU Whatever your existing preconceptions of Bollywood are, see this Ă&#x20AC; OP DQG OHW LWV SHUIRUPDQFHV EORZ \RX DZD\

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gets bitten by a wolf-like creature, spends many days in bed mincing around on the verge of death before making a remarkable recovery, RQO\ WR Ă&#x20AC; QG KH¡V FRQWUDFWHG WKH curse of the lycanthrope and now turns into said terrible beast every full moon- donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t you hate it when that happens?

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pressive performances as estranged father and prodigal son, Hugo Weaving is a joy to watch as ever with his thoughtful and lingering delivery, whilst Emily Bluntâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s effort at playing lover to two brothers is FRPSDUDWLYHO\ ZHDN One of the most impressive things DERXW WKLV Ă&#x20AC; OP LV WKH VSHFLDO HIIHFWV which ensure that the notoriously GLIĂ&#x20AC; FXOW ÂśFKDQJH VFHQHV¡ DUH VOLJKWO\ disturbing, as joints bulge, creak and enlarge, but generally believDEOH A modern version of a cult classic executed well with an ending that simply screams, or rather howls, ÂśVHTXHO¡

Director: Garry Marshall Cast: Jessica Alba, Jessica Biel, Jennifer Garner, Jamie Foxx, Anne Hathaway, Julia Roberts Run time: 125 Mins

My Name Is Khan Director: Karen Johar Cast: Shahrukh Khan Runtime: 161 mins

Since the overwhelming success of Slumdog Millionare, Indian Cinema with its iconic music, culture and stars has gained huge popularity DQG LQWHUQDWLRQDO VXFFHVV 7KH ODWHVW RIIHULQJ IURP %RO lywood, My Name is Khan, differs from the traditional choreography

The Wolfman Director: Joe Johnston &DVW %HQLFLR 'HO 7RUR $QWKRQ\ Hopkins, Emily Blunt, Hugo Weaving Runtime: 102 Mins

7DNH RQH SURYLQFLDO QLQHWHHQWK century English setting, add to it an ageing Anthony Hopkins, a Benicio 'HO 7RUR ZKR KDV D SUHRFFXSDWLRQ with roaming the countryside on all fours disemboweling the poor souls KH KDSSHQV DFURVV DQG HUU $JHQW Smith, no wait, its Hugo Weaving and what do you get?

Joe Skrebels

Matthew Blackwell

Rachel Hill

Chris Binding

30

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Culture Music

Exclusive interview with Jon Allen >>>thecourieronline.co.uk/music

music N. STILLER

interview

Nice to meet you, Lightspeed Champion Ben Travis gets the lowdown on the life and times of Dev Hynes , UHPHPEHU WKH H[DFW PRPHQW WKDW , became a fan of Lightspeed Champion, aka DevontĂŠ Hynes.

Monday January 21 2008, the release date of debut album Falling Off the Lavender Bridge, found my VL[WHHQ \HDU ROG VHOI LQ WRZQ SHrusing the DVDs and CDs in HMV having just been given my monthly payslip. And there it was, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;that new project from that guy who was in Test Iciclesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

It was an impulse buy, I admit â&#x20AC;&#x201C; the type where you see an album cover and think, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll give that a chanceâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. It was one of the best chances I ever took.

7KH Ă&#x20AC;UVW WLPH , OLVWHQHG WKH IXOO impact of the album didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t really hit me, but all I knew was that by the end of No Surprise I just wanted to listen to the whole thing again.

It was beautiful and intricate, yet real, honest and accessible, without a hint of pretentiousness. It became undoubtedly my favourite album of 2008.

Fast forward to now, and his second album Life is Sweet! Nice to Meet You is now out. As I speak to Dev, LW¡V DERXW Ă&#x20AC;YH R¡ FORFN LQ WKH PLGVW of a day full of promotion, where he is possibly being asked the same questions over and over again â&#x20AC;&#x201C; but heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s remarkably enthusiastic, engaging and dynamic.

When I ask him if heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s happy with how the new album turned out, he says â&#x20AC;&#x153;Yeah!â&#x20AC;?, and you genuinely EHOLHYH KLV H[FLWHPHQW 7KHUH¡V DOVR D VHQVH RI UHOLHI WKDW LW¡V Ă&#x20AC;QDOO\ EHing released, having been recorded months ago. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It feels very weird [that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s only MXVW EHLQJ UHOHDVHG@ Âľ KH H[SODLQV

â&#x20AC;&#x153;because for me itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s gone through being about four different albums.â&#x20AC;?

Regardless of how the album has changed and evolved, the result is a truly brilliant one that can stand proudly beside his debut.

One thing that particularly struck me when Lavender Bridge came out was that many of the lyrics were LQWHQVHO\ SHUVRQDO IRU H[DPSOH I Could Have Done This Myself tells WKH VWRU\ RI 'HY¡V VHFRQG VH[XDO HQFRXQWHU DSSDUHQWO\ WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW ZDV so traumatic that it became blocked from his memory). According to him, this album is just as personal. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re all pretty personal, just whatever was on my mind is laid out. There were moments when I half-heartedly attempted to do things and gave up, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all a reĂ HFWLRQ RI ZKHUH , ZDV DW WKH WLPH Âľ Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s very much a clichĂŠ to say so, but the sound of Life is Sweet! is bigger and bolder than the more restrained Lavender Bridge, with classical-sounding piano interludes and Greek-style vocally harmonised chorus. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I wanted it to be really over the top and quite funny,â&#x20AC;? Dev reveals, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not cool really â&#x20AC;&#x201C; now itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cool to be minimal. But the way I see it, the production is there to make you sound good! I wanted it to sound very â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;2010â&#x20AC;&#x2122;.â&#x20AC;?

Alongside Lightspeed Champion, Devâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s also turned his attention to a new project, Blood Orange. With coastal, echoing guitars and epic yet simplistic sonic landscapes, Blood 2UDQJH LV D VLJQLĂ&#x20AC;FDQWO\ GLIIHUHQW proposal to Lightspeed Champion. â&#x20AC;&#x153;There will be an album and a tour. The Blood Orange album is already recorded! It should be out by the end of the year.â&#x20AC;?

But worry not, fans â&#x20AC;&#x201C; this doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t mean the end of Lightspeed Champion. â&#x20AC;&#x153;At the moment, I see Blood Orange as one album.â&#x20AC;? So neither

project will eventually take over? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Not really, no.â&#x20AC;?

Knowing that Dev is a huge fan RI :HH]HU DQ REYLRXV LQĂ XHQFH RQ the general tone and sound of Lightspeed Champion, and who also happen to be my favourite band, I indulged in asking his view on their opinion-splitting new album, leading to one of the best (and only) rockâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;nâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;roll anecdotes Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve heard. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s funny,â&#x20AC;? he starts, â&#x20AC;&#x153;when I Ă&#x20AC;UVW OLVWHQHG WR LW , ZDVQ¡W RYHUO\ impressed. But then that evening I was at a friendâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s house â&#x20AC;&#x201C; well I say a friend, it was Keith from We Are Scientists. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d gone round to play Call of Duty.â&#x20AC;? <HV \RX KHDUG LW KHUH Ă&#x20AC;UVW 'HY plays Call of Duty with Keith from We Are Scientists! â&#x20AC;&#x153;I asked if I could bring a CD round, and when I listened to it there it sounded awesome!â&#x20AC;?

With Weezer having collaborated with Lilâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Wayne, would Dev would consider a collaboration with a more unusual artist? ´, GR %XW QR RQH Ă&#x20AC;QGV RXW DERXW it,â&#x20AC;? he divulges. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve actually been producing some Hip Hop and Râ&#x20AC;&#x2122;nâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;B stuff.â&#x20AC;?

So what does the future hold for Hynes? â&#x20AC;&#x153;There should be a tour for Lightspeed Champion around March and April, and I keep getting calls about festivals.â&#x20AC;? $QG FDQ ZH H[SHFW WR VHH KLP LQ Newcastle? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Yes, almost certainly!â&#x20AC;?

With the new album already gaining high critical interest, it looks set to be a fantastic year for Dev. And with an already astonishing body of work, he certainly deserves the public recognition that Life is Sweet! Nice to Meet You is sure to bring.

Life is Sweet! Nice to Meet You is out now. Look for a review in next weekâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s edition of The Courier

the debate Old rockers, or new tricks?

Mark Corcoran-Lettice Music Editor So, the headliners for this yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Glastonbury Festival, the fortieth one, have been revealed, and there are very few shocks. Alongside the relatively youthful Muse (themselves Glastonbury veterans), thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the somewhat more â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;matureâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; U2 and Stevie Wonder.

At a festival where the reunited Blur were still the most contemporary headliners by far last year, this may not be too surprising. But it is indicative of a rather strange trend thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s emerging of the pensioncollecting rock star.

To be fair to them, some artists wear their age well, and if anything

have improved with it. The likes of Neil Young or Bob Dylan have shown that a rocker can remain relevant to new generations, while the remarkable comeback of Gil Scott-Heron with Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m New Here, his Ă&#x20AC;UVW DOEXP IRU VL[WHHQ \HDUV VKRZV how pioneers can keep themselves at the cutting edge.

Who, out of todayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s big things is likely to achieve such lasting success?

0RUH FXOWLVK Ă&#x20AC;JXUHV OLNH 1LFN Cave have survived by transforming their music and image radically

without diluting their unique appeal, while Morrissey is arguably as popular today as he ever has been (even if he has become something RI D VDIH HVWDEOLVKPHQW Ă&#x20AC;JXUH LQ WKH process).

But even so, there is something worrying about this: quite simply, who out of todayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s big things is likely to achieve such lasting success? I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know about you, but I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t see Florence Welch or The Courteeners packing them in thirty years down the line.

There are still plenty of superb young musicians out there, but quality is even less of a guarantee to fame than it used to be, and this may be something we end up regretting.

Christopher Scott Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hard to believe that people like Keith Richards, Mick Jagger and Ozzy Osborne are still breathing, let alone that theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re still selling out stadiums.

These golden oldies may be well LQWR WKHLU VL[WLHV EXW WKH\ VWLOO PDQage to please a crowd.

Just look at The Who: even though only half of the band remains, they still managed to headline the 02 festival a couple of years ago and recently played during the half time interval at the Super Bowl XLIV, whilst the Rolling Stones have a possible tour starting at the end of this year, seemingly with no plans

of retiring yet.

Say what you will, but you cannot deny that even though they may all have had their day, these bands remain classic and still entertain people of all ages and will probably GR VR XQWLO WKH\ Ă&#x20AC;QDOO\ GHFLGH WR stop.

What sets these performers aside from the artists who have retired is their attitude - they wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t stop until they have to. Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve been in the industry for years and have a winning formula.

And if touring and the rockstar lifestyle suddenly stops appealing to some of these ancient rock stars, then all is not lost for them. After all. thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s always car insurance schemes to promote.

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

31

Music Culture Music Editors: Mark Corcoran-Lettice and Chris Mandle - courier.culture-music@ncl.ac.uk

gigs Beth Jeans Houghton, Stornoway

Hall 2, The Sage 14 February When you are used to the acoustics of sweaty basement venues, it was a welcome relief to be in a venue sculpted to acoustic precision, and it played an ideal host to its performers. Stornoway led with reverb-laden vocals and four part harmonies.

So far, so Fleet Foxes, but thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; s a certain unmistakable Britishness about them, in their coy approach to performance and crowd banter, the most curious being the recounting of the true story of Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

'D\ ZKLFK LQYROYHG Ă RJJLQJ FLYLO ians with goatskin. The highlight came with Zorbing, a twee folk slice of glory with soaring vocals of hairraising beauty.

Beth Jeans Houghton followed and ambled through her quirky folk in a towering wig. Occasionally it was captivating: Dodecahedron displayed the complexity of Haughtonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s songwriting and the power of her vocals. There were even some loved-up covers to remind us of the romantic occasion.

But sometimes it was fumbled.

At the age of nineteen itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s unsurprising that there were nerves, but mistakes and pauses led to a rather stammered performance.

Perhaps it was the almighty Sage that imposed a lack of professional sheen, but Haughton will need to sharpen up to follow memorable performances from the likes of Stornoway.

Gordon Bruce Online Editor

Vampire Weekend 02 Academy Newcastle, 12 February

Vampire Weekend are a lot of fun.

7KHLU Ă&#x20AC; UVW DOEXP WROG PH WKLV WKH songs Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve heard from the second reinforced this, and seeing them headline this sold out gig proved this.

From the moment they (literally) bounded onto the chandelieradorned stage, smiles in place, and blasted into White Sky, it was clear this was going to be a fun gig.

That too-familiar haze of tourtiredness that affects some bands just didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t seem to be considered, every member of the band was playing like they were loving every moment, and the crowd showed their appreciation by exploding with joy at every new song they recognised.

With a nice mix of old and new tracks, the gig allowed for those of XV ZKR IHOO LQ ORYH DW Ă&#x20AC; UVW VLJKW WR indulge in those songs that made us smile two years ago while those who had only just heard the band

Lamb of God

02 Academy Newcastle, 10 February

After a long absence, Lamb of God recently returned to Newcastle to give their huge North-East fan-base another stellar concert.

Coming very close to completely selling out the Academy, Lamb of Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s performance enthralled the diverse crowd in attendance, from

Reformed Faction, Emergency Librarian

Star and Shadow Cinema, 12 February It seems that arriving on time to the Star and Shadow cinema is not necessary: this gig kicked off an hour late, which, while a little boring, did allow for a thorough investigation of the remarkable amount of cables, organisation and electrical components required to produce a night of industrial and post-punk music.

First up were the entertaining Emergency Librarian whose crowd interaction was not only amusing but informative as the librarians gave a rundown of whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s involved in the â&#x20AC;&#x153;fourth Emergency Serviceâ&#x20AC;?.

Mesmerising synth and carefully created electro were achieved us-

ing a multitude of obscure electric instruments, voice changers, laptops and a lot of dials.

This combined well with the absurd visualisations projected behind them, notably pulsating brains and rampaging robots.

7KH JURXS Ă&#x20AC; QLVKHG RII ZLWK WKHLU Ă&#x20AC; UVW OLYH SHUIRUPDQFH RI WKH XSEHDW number Jazz Brain, to the delight of the Star and Shadow clientele.

Following Emergency Librarian came Reformed Faction, who turned out to be a very different RXWĂ&#x20AC; W 7KH SHUIRUPDQFH ZDV VHOI involved and experimental. The music was absorbing, however after at least an hour of unremitting hypnotic build up, it became somewhat boring.

Perhaps it appealed strongly to the purists, for they were the only ones to remain, but most listeners seemed to lose interest in the set.

The visualisations were intriguLQJ WDNHQ IURP WKH Ă&#x20AC; OP if) but they didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t compensate for the lack of imagination in the repetitive, sopoULĂ&#x20AC; F QRLVH FUHDWHG Henry Jones

Jon Allen

The Cluny, 10 February Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s something desperately lost in the poetic nature of a man and his acoustic guitar playing in a pub.

In the age of Spotify, Last.fm and torrents thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s little reason for taking the traditionalist route, but tonight could have been an extract

Publicist

Star and Shadow Cinema, 13 February

Tucked away at the edge of Byker Bridge resides The Star and Shadow Cinema, a well loved alternative gig venue and cinema run entirely by volunteers.

On Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Eve, it played host

got to revel in the new material.

There were a couple of down moments as slower tracks werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t as well received and, unfortunately, the brilliant b-Side Boston simply wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t recognised by most of the crowd but on the whole the gig

went from strength to strength throughout, and Vampire Weekend left Newcastle an altogether happier place.

the moshing kids near the front to the grizzled veteran metalheads quietly sipping pints from strategic viewpoints.

For a change, someone decided to give the band enough time to slowly work their way through a lot of material, giving the concert an enjoyably drawn-out atmosphere that kept fans excited throughout whilst not stressing people with that feeling you get when you know the curfew is fast approaching.

Thankfully, someone also knew their way around the sound setup enough to give the groove-metal pioneers a respectable-sounding rig that showcased the funky and lay-

ered wall of sound theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve become famous for.

Less can be said for support act Job For a Cowboy, whose musical renditions undoubtedly suffered from the sheer noisy intensity of their performance.

Nevertheless, their potential as a new great hope for death metal is clear, although the lesser-known August Burns Red managed to outshine them a bit despite the always-annoying presence of screamo vocals interlaced with frenetic metalcore.

from the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;70s.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a strong clichĂŠ, but the opportunity to scour the local venues for emerging talent still has an appeal, allowing the artist to fully express who they are.

Jon Allenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s live performances are by no means going to create a frenzy of hype amongst the underground music scene, but his and his touring bandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ability to elaborate and restructure their songs with such ease is an ability any levelheaded music fan can admire.

Playing the majority of the debut

LP, Dead Manâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Suit, in its entirety, Allen came on stage solo before the backing band supported the core of the set.

The set lacked a certain degree of excitement that surrounds many upcoming artists on the legendary Cluny stage, but both passion and professionalism were present.

As Bob Dylan once sang, â&#x20AC;&#x153;The times they are a changingâ&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x201C; though itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s nice to look back once in a while.

to an alternative disco featuring Onoma, SDF and The Publicist.

Onoma kicked the night off with lengthy themes that the experimental duo churned out over and over, with little excitement. Their music was lost in the room however, and added little to the atmosphere.

Next came SDF, a local band who were a stark contrast and welcome relief. A collective producing a pop electro disco with a Jarvis Cockeresque voice slapped on over the top created the perfect arrangement for some experimental pop fun.

To round the night off there was

the headliner Publicist, who provided an auditory treat.

Also known as Sebastian Thomson, this solo artist brought his VWDJH WR WKH PLGGOH RI WKH Ă RRU RI the Star and Shadow, and stormed straight into energetic drum beats over the top of synths, while singing into a decoder: an impressive feat, covering the room in electro beats impossible not to move to, which got the crowd swarming around him watching in awe.

A night not to be forgotten.

Joe Skrebels

Romain Chenet

Stuart Edwards

Olivia Mason

32

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Culture Music

For more exclusive reviews and content >>> thecourieronline.co.uk/music

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Joe Skrebels

Polly Randall

Benjamin Jackson

Linsey Teggert

Joe Cooper

Dan Le Sac vs. Scroobius Pip

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

33

Music Culture

festivals

The Great British Festival?

Joe Skrebels on how the music festival became the heart of the music experience We live in a very good time for live music. With record sales dwindling by the day, every act from the biggest stadium-crushing superstar to the tiniest, independently released, home-recorded group of indie kids needs to play live if they want any hope of a decent, recurring pay cheque.

Gone are the days where tours would be few and far between for your favourite band, where youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d have to jump on a train for hours to get to your nearest mid-to-largesized venue â&#x20AC;&#x201C; now bands want to

play in your pub down the road.

And whilst we get more live music, festivals have become big business too, and why wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t they?

Getting paid more than most of your gigs put together for just a fraction of the work sounds like a pretty good deal to me, and to most major bands nowadays. It seems to me, unromantic and moolah-driven though it is, that this is why the British music festival has become quite the phenomenon it has.

But who really cares? The music festival has been a staple part of my summer for several years now, and this year seems no exception, and there is one simple reason for that â&#x20AC;&#x201C; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s always bloody good fun.

As a music geek and a Glastonbury fan, I get to traipse around KXJH Ă&#x20AC;HOGV WU\LQJ WR VHH DV PDQ\ bands as possible in a short space

Revellers during Bruce Springsteenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s set at last yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Glastonbury Festival

of time (somewhat shamefully, I brought a diary with me last year just to optimise my band-seeing capability), whilst sampling the delights of world cooking and watching pilled-up revellers fall over.

Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just my idea of a good weekend, but the real beauty of the festival is how it can cater to almost any tastes, musical or otherwise. If you want to watch the biggest in-

die chart-botherers whilst getting wildly drunk and burning things, Reading, Leeds or T In The Park are for you.

Perhaps youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re a fan of listening to euphoric trance and remembering very little as you clamour for water ² &UHDPĂ&#x20AC;HOGV LQ RWKHU ZRUGV %XW what if you want to smoke something, learn how to make trousers out of reeds and listen to folk mu-

Playaway Festival 16-18 April, Butlins Skegness, ÂŁ150-170 playawayfestival.co.uk

sic? Green Man. So forget about bands desperately scrabbling for money, letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s focus on why we, the people who pay those ever-rising ticket prices for the SULYLOHJH RI D WHQW LQ D Ă&#x20AC;HOG PDNH the festival such a brilliant and essential experience.

The festival sense of community is almost unknown in todayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s frigid world - last year, a friend and I were asked if we wanted to be superheroes, had our faces painted and were told to go and help make DQRWKHU SHUVRQ Ă \ E\ Ă LQJLQJ WKHP up into the air on a bedsheet. Is that likely to happen to you on Northumberland Street? No. This is why the festival has become a modern institution, not because bands have to play live, but because people like you and me want those experiences year after year, and until the prices become far more extortionate than they already are, that will continue.

Festival Guide 2010: Part I Latitude Festival 16-19 July, Henham Park, Suffolk, ÂŁtbc latitudefestival.co.uk

EXIT Festival 8-11 July, Novi Sad, Serbia, ÂŁ85 exitfest.org

Sonisphere 30 July-1 August, Knebworth, ÂŁ132.50-ÂŁ157.50 sonispherefestivals.com

Beach Break Festival 14-18 June, Pembrey, South Wales, ÂŁ74-89 www.beachbreaklive.com

Situated in the picturesque depths of the Henham Park Estate in Suffolkâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Sunrise Coast, Latitude has quickly gathered a reputation for being one of the friendliest, most relaxed and diverse festivals on the scene, and WKLV \HDU¡V Ă&#x20AC;IWK HGLWLRQ ORRNV VHW WR carry on this tradition.

Last yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Latitude Festival played host to a wide array of talent, from headliners like Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds and Pet Shop Boys, providing early festival showcases for the likes of The xx and, of course, a remarkable, rare solo appearance from Radioheadâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Thom Yorke.

While the line-up for this year is currently a closely-guarded secret, internet rumours abound suggesting acts such as the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Massive Attack, PJ Harvey, Elbow or even indie-rock gods Pixies could be potential headliners.

Beyond the music as well though, Latitude consistently boasts a remarkable line-up of comedians, ZULWHUV SRHWV Ă&#x20AC;OPV DQG SHUIRUPHUV across many stages that gives it a truly unique character â&#x20AC;&#x201C; people may claim that you could enjoy Glastonbury without seeing a single band, but at Latitude thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s entirely possible.

For beautiful surroundings, good company, a cosy atmosphere and a unique, diverse experience, Latitude is once more the place to be this summer.

The festival season is slowly creeping up on us and one thing is for certain - English festivals are so last summer. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s time to look elsewhere, and where better than the awardwinning EXIT festival.

6HW LQ WKH FRQĂ&#x20AC;QHV RI WKH 3HWURvaradin Fortress in Serbia, EXIT has just celebrated its tenth anniversary and is fast becoming one of the most unique festivals in Europe.

The festival promises an incredible and eclectic line-up with music ranging from rap, to rock, to classical, and a bit of dance and electronic slapped in for good measure. Unlike English festivals, the music and festivities proceed into the early hours of the morning. The experience of dancing with twenty-thousand people as the sun rises over the fortress walls is truly mind blowing.

Acts from last yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s line-up included the Prodigy, Arctic Monkeys, Lily Allen, Korn, Kraftwerk, Eric Prydz and Carl Cox to name but a few. This yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s line-up has yet to be fully announced, but as previous years have demonstrated, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sure to be a belter.

Tickets are an unbelievable ÂŁ85, and alongside cheap booze and food, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no room for complaints. If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re looking for something a bit different, with world class acts, a stunning location, and an electrifying atmosphere, EXIT Festival is GHĂ&#x20AC;QLWHO\ WKH RQH IRU \RX

Forget Download.

This year, it is Sonisphere that looks prepared to take the metal festival crown. With a line-up including such metal giants as Slayer, The Cult, Anthrax and the phenomenal Motley Crue, Sonisphere is gearing up to be a festival goliath in 2010.

And that is without even mentioning the headliners. When I heard Rammstein were playing, I was already weak with anticipation.

The German band has gone from strength to strength throughout their career, and is recognised as one of the greatest metal bands in history, while their pyrotechnicĂ&#x20AC;OOHG OLYH DFW KDV EHFRPH WKH VWXII RI legend.

The other headline act needs no introduction - the gods of the New Wave Of British Heavy Metal, Iron Maiden, a band so widely renowned WKH\ HYHQ KDYH WKHLU RZQ Ă&#x20AC;OP 2I course, even Iron Maiden will have a hard time stealing the show from rock legends like Alice Cooper and Iggy Pop, both of whom are lending their formidable talents to what promises to be a frankly epic festival.

If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re a big metal fan, maybe this year you should give the Download festival a miss for once and instead travel down to Knebworth, for what could very well be the greatest metal festival you will ever catch.

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll see you there.

Lincolnshire is not, it must be said, usually renowned as the musical epicentre of the UK. For one weekend in April though, Butlins in Skegness will hold host to the new Playaway Festival, which has been graced with the ultra-credible likes of These New Puritans and The Futureheads.

Playaway isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just some hipster hangout though. With a bumper radio friendly line up, including headliners Scouting for Girls, Scottish dance king Calvin Harris and the number one stars the Noisettes, backed up by everyoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s favourite Danish guilty pleasure Alphabeat, as well as the North Eastâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s folk sensation Beth Jeans Houghton, cliches about â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;something for everyoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; may for once actually apply.

If this dosnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t tempt you, the lack of mud or frustrating tent problems must surely be an added bonus, with accommodation being provided in Butlins apartments.

Perhaps not one for the more diehard festival fan, but with added late night treats including â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;the underground rebel bingo clubâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, or the depressing disco â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Feeling Gloomyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; to make you happy again, the weekend is set out to be as much of a holiday as itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s meant to be a festival.

And, if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re still not convinced, be assured; hopefully, there wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be a red blazer in sight.

Reading, Leeds and Glastonbury et al be damned, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the Beach Break Live festival that people should be getting excited about this year.

Stationed this year in South Walesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Pembrey Country Park, lauded by organisers as â&#x20AC;&#x153;the most amazing festival location on earthâ&#x20AC;?, the festival offers a beautiful beach side location, unrivalled atmosphere and a fantastic line up. :KLOVW QR RIĂ&#x20AC;FLDO GHWDLOV DUH yet available, with artists like The Cribs, The Zutons and The Mystery Jets taking to the stage in recent years, Beach Break is sure to deal up the goods again this year.

So, I hear you ask, with no line up details, what is there to be getting excited about? Well, plenty.

Because even without the music, Pembrey has plenty to offer festival goers.

Golf courses, horse riding and even a 130m dry ski slope mean that when the bands stop playing, youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll still have plenty to do.

And if such adventurous pursuits arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t your cup of tea, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s eight miles of Welsh beach to keep you occupied in the mornings before it all kicks off again.

With 2010 billed by the organisers as the festivalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;golden yearâ&#x20AC;?, ,¡G GHĂ&#x20AC;QLWHO\ UHFRPPHQG WKDW \RX consider the Beach Break Live festival when planning your festivalling this summer.

Mark Corcoran-Lettice Music Editor

Daniel Bos

Chris Render

Tom Richards

Chris Render

34

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Culture TV & Radio

tv & radio C4

tv highlights

soaps Coronation Street

Hung

Mon, Thurs, Fri on ITV1 Gail and Tina travel to the Lake District to identify Joeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s body but Gail loses her nerve and wants to tell the police the truth. David manages to persuade her to stay quiet while he destroys some vital evidence. Tyroneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s mum Jackie arrives on Coronation Street to look after him but later in the week she takes things into her own hands by confronting Molly about why she left her son, and then accuses her of having an affair.

10.45pm Thursday, C4 The criticallyacclaimed US series Hung arrives on our screens this week courtesy of Channel 4 and although it sounds cheap and crude, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s more enjoyable than you imagine. A good mix of dark humour and drama as ZH Ă&#x20AC;QG RXW KRZ IDU RQH PDQ ZLOO JR WR PDNH D OLYLQJ LQ GLIĂ&#x20AC;FXOW HFRnomic circumstances.

Thomas Jane (starred in The Sweetest Thing, The Mist and Dark Country) plays desperate man Ray Drecker.

Once a high school sports legend, famed for his skills and charisma, now a bored, middle-aged basketball coach whose team are losing every match, whose wifeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s left him for a rich man and whose already pretty grim rundown house has been burned to the ground. Desperate times call for desperate measures and things donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t get more desperate than asking your ex-wife for a loan VR \RX FDQ Ă&#x20AC;[ \RXU OLIH 2U GR WKH\" After his ex-wife reminds him ex-

actly why she left him, Ray decides to attend a get-rich-quick seminar where the attendees are encouraged WR Ă&#x20AC;QG WKHLU RZQ VSHFLDO PDUNHWDEOH tool to start their own business.

After fatefully bumping into former one night stand, Tanya, Ray soon realises that his own â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;marketable toolâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; is in his boxers. After placing an ad in the paper, Ray starts moonlighting as happiness consultant â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Big Donnieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

8QIRUWXQDWHO\ KLV Ă&#x20AC;UVW FOLHQW UHjects him and he wonders whether he has what it takes to bring happiness to the ladies of Detroit. When Tanya sees his advert, she tells him she could do a much better job and offers a partnership â&#x20AC;&#x201C; for a percentage of his takings.

So Tanya becomes the brains (not exactly what you a imagine a pimp to look like) and Big Donnie becomes the body of what turns into quite a lucrative business.

Check out the trailer at www. youtube.com for a glimpse into what the series has to offer.

Married Single Other

NME Awards

Damages

9pm Monday, ITV1

11.25pm Friday, C4

10.45pm Wednesday, BBC1

Pick of the week

Eastenders

Mon, Tues, Thurs, Fri on BBC1 After Fridayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s live episode, Walford has been left reeling but there is more drama to come, of course! Zainab confronts Syed and Christian about their canoodling at the catering unit but when Sted storms out, the door handle becomes loose and comes off. Without a phone, heavily pregnant Zainab doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know how to get help but she emails her family in hope. Suddenly, the baby decides itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s time to come â&#x20AC;&#x201C; will Zainab make LW WR KRVSLWDO LQ WLPH"

Hollyoaks

Aimee Philipson TV & Radio Editor

ITV1

C4

Chris Moylesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Quiz Night 10pm Friday, C4 C4

BBC/SONY PICTURES

Weekdays at 6.30pm on C4 Ricky fears he will be sent to a foster family now Duncan has found out that his dad has MS but Duncan agrees to keep quiet. Elsewhere, Charlotte nominates Dave to tell Josh that he should move out of halls but Josh isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t leaving without D Ă&#x20AC;JKW 7RQ\ DQG &LQG\ VXVSHFW 'Rminic is the secret internet critic trying to ruin Il Gnoshâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s reputation but soon Theresa becomes the suspect when sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s seen typing something on her laptop.

Emmerdale

Weekdays, 7pm Ashley dreads Laurel turning up at Mulberry but will he be surprised or disappointed when she wants WR WDON DERXW WKHLU PDUULDJH" :LOO Laurel be able to forgive Ashley and move forward and will Ashley HYHU IHHO WUXVWHG DJDLQ" 0HDQZKLOH across the village, Chas and Gennie have a whip-around to help rebuild Zak and Lisaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s house.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been a while since a new British sitcom has been highly anticipated.

This new comedy show explores the lives of three couples at different stages in their relationships.

Lillie and Eddie have two children and are rock solid after being together for sixteen years, but thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s one thing missing - marriage. Eddieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s on a mission to get Lillie down the aisle, despite the fact that sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s turned him down every year.

Then we have her best friend Babs whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been married to Dickie for a decade; but sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not happy and is on the verge of walking out. But will KH VXUSULVH KHU" Before you dismiss it, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not all misery and marriage. Dickieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s brother Clint, played by Ralf Little, is a serial womanizer (thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s always one) whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s used to women falling at his feet, but not his new girl.

If you liked Two Pints then youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll like this; after all, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s past the watershed so itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s worth a watch!

I realise you could probably do without another awards ceremony, but this yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s NME Shockwaves Awards 2010 are set to honour some pretty decent acts.

6KHIĂ&#x20AC;HOG KHUR -DUYLV &RFNHU DQG the beautiful Alexa Chung (ShefĂ&#x20AC;HOG KHUR $OH[ 7XUQHU¡V PLVVXV DUH your hosts this year - strange combination if ever there was one.

Nevertheless, with performances from The Specials, The Big Pink and this yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Godlike Geniusâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Paul Weller, you can bet your bottom dollar itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be good.

Look out for Kasabian (back from launching the new England away kit in France, ironically) who will be joining forces with Noel Fielding, and the much anticipated comeback of Courtney Loveâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Hole (Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m saying nothing).

Top nominees this year include Muse, Jamie T, Florence and the Machine and Arctic Monkeys, so expect an all-star inebriated audience.

Glenn Close returns in the third series of this impressive drama set in the fast-paced, cut-throat world of New York litigation.

Close stars as the fearsome litigator Patty Hughes, alongside Rose Byrne, who plays her go-getting young protĂŠgĂŠ, Ellen Parsons. ,Q WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW HSLVRGH (OOHQ LV ZRUNLQJ DW WKH 'LVWULFW $WWRUQH\¡V RIĂ&#x20AC;FH SURVHFXWLQJ WKH Ă&#x20AC;QDQFLHU /RX 7RELQ who ran a $70 billion Ponzi scheme, and Patty is the court-appointed trustee representing the victims of the scheme.

As the situation develops, Lou Tobin tries his best to keep his wife and son out of the criminal investigation with the help of his attorney Leonard Winstone.

At the same time, Ellen is working on another big case, trying to get a drug dealer to reveal the identity of KLV VXSSOLHU :KHQ VKH Ă&#x20AC;QDOO\ PDNHV a breakthrough, she suspects Pattyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s involvement and confronts her.

Chris Moyles is back. Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s off the air and back on the TV screens for you to feast your eyes on.

If you like quiz shows then you will probably like this. If you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t feel like the mammoth assault on your senses that Moyles is undoubtedly due to deliver â&#x20AC;&#x201C; donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t stress â&#x20AC;&#x201C; questions will also be delivered by celebrity guests as well!

A new panel of celebrities is invited on the show each week and each has to answer questions correctly in order to win money for their â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;fansâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; in the audience.

Guests this week are David Walliams, Peter Andre and Christine Bleakley.

The Hoosiers will also be making an appearance in order to sing a maths question to the celebs.

If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re into celebrity quiz shows or youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re up for a bit of VHOI DIĂ&#x20AC;UPDWLRQ WXQH LQ WR &KDQnel 4 this Friday at 10pm.

Neighbours

Lynsey Fawcett

Helen Atkinson

Joel Stein

Jessica Bean

Aimee Philipson TV & Radio Editor

1.45pm and 5.30pm on Five Libby and Lucas are both regretting their secret snog but neither of them can anticipate what happens next. Steph is convinced the pair are KDYLQJ D Ă LQJ DQG RYHUFRPH ZLWK jealousy she sleeps with...Dan! Elsewhere at Erinsborough High School, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s exam results day. Does everyERG\ JHW WKH JUDGHV WKH\ GHVHUYH"

Home and Away

Weekdays at 2.15pm/6pm on Five Martha, although being hot and a pole dancer, has never been lucky in love and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s unlikely that Liam, the troubled, drug-addled rock star, will be the solution to her love problems.

However, she sleeps with him and then he moves in with her, in swift soap-style fashion. Elsewhere, Angelo and Charlieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s relationship is on the rocks. Angelo canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t wait to start looking for a house but Charlie is stressing about moving in together.

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

35

TV & Radio Culture TV & Radio Editor: Aimee Philipson - courier.culture-tv@ncl.ac.uk ITV

Titchmarsh uprooted my Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Glee

catch-up tv Take Me Out

Joe Mellor Columnist

Saturdays 8pm, ITV1 Catch-up on ITVPlayer Charlie Brooker described it as a cross between Blind Date and the Boots â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Here Come the Girlsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; advert.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been slated by just about every journalist imaginable, yet its popularity is ever growing. This, my friends, is 21st century dating in the form of Take Me Out. The format of the show is repetitive, albeit in a worryingly comforting way.

At the beginning of the show, host Paddy McGuinness introduces the thirty â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;lovely ladiesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, who line up behind a row of illuminated podiums waiting for a single man to make his big entrance.

The â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;ladiesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; are comparable to the archetypal lass tottering up and down the Bigg Market on a Saturday night - cheap, gobby and relatively harmless.

Single Man enters - he is either an arrogant gym freak or a nerdy type whose experience with â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;birdsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; is

limited to trips to an RSPB nature reserve.

In a nutshell, single man is belittled by thirty women, a video is shown of single man in his natural environment, women turn their â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;lightsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; off LI WKH\ GRQ¡W Ă&#x20AC; QG 6LQJOH 0DQ DWWUDF tive and Paddy runs around the studio like an energetic puppy that just wants to be loved.

If Single Man makes it to the end

with lights still lit, he chooses a girl to â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;take him outâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; to Fernandoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s (Manchesterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hottest nightspot, apparently).

This is repeated four times and voilĂ , you have an episode.

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not going to lie; Take Me Out is trash television, which I feel ashamed to enjoy thoroughly.

Any guy in his right mind wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t take out the female contestants, but I

ad of the week

what i listen to

Sharing your tub is perfect romance

...before I go out

I hate to be horribly soppy, especially when, in my opinion, Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Day is always nothing more than an excuse for Clinton cards to make money but my favourite advert on TV at the moment is the Haagen Dazs one.

The simplicity of the boyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s romanWLF JHVWXUH Ă&#x20AC; OOV PH ZLWK D ZDUP fuzzy feeling. He takes his love interest to watch a ballet from the scaffolding above the theatre stage.

Whilst watching theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not all over each other licking, sucking or FDUHVVLQJ WKH\ DUH MXVW TXLHWO\ VLW ting just a little bit awkwardly apart until without a single word the boy

smiles at her and offers her a spoonful of ice-cream.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all in a look and a gentle touch of the hand and not one word is spoken.

This to my mind is romance. I know that sex sells but I think that WKLV LV DQ LQĂ&#x20AC; QLWHO\ PRUH VXEWOH DS proach to it and it makes me far more jealous of the smug couples than any of the other tacky adverts that have been showing for Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Day on TV. Cordelia Rosa

When Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m getting ready for a night RXW , Ă&#x20AC; QG , QHHG DQ DGHTXDWH VRXQG track to get dressed to and I can think of no better show to provide this than Trevor Nelson on BBC Radio 1 on Saturdays between 7pm and 9 pm.

7KH XQLTXH EOHQG RI +LS +RS RnB, Soul, Reggae and Dancehall tracks showcased here by Nelson is perfect if you need to loosen up before heading out to the clubs and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a great distraction from the tiresome task of arranging your wardrobe so you look somewhat presentable!

The great mixture of sombre RnB tracks from the likes of Whitney Houston and Mariah Carey to the PDVVLYH Ă RRU Ă&#x20AC; OOHUV IURP WKH %ODFN Eyed Peas and Flo Rida ensure that there is something for all days and every mood.

Perhaps listening in may make the

think thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s what makes it so enterWDLQLQJ LQ WKH Ă&#x20AC; UVW SODFH I imagine Paddy takes the remaining girls to his Bolton boudoir anyway, so everyoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a winner.

His catchphrases such as â&#x20AC;&#x153;no likey, no lightyâ&#x20AC;? are worth tuning in for alone. As it goes though, Paddy, I happen to â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;likeyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; it very much.

Helen Atkinson

night more memorable or it may be the only thing you remember the morning after - hopefully that wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be the case!

Trevor Nelson is one of Radio ¡V PRVW LQà XHQWLDO SUHVHQWHUV DQG whenever possible he tries to promote home grown talent which has added to his popularity.

So expect to hear something fresh as well as tunes from your favourite artists. If you do end up having a truly mind blowing night you can at least relive a part of it by listening to a replay of the show on iPlayer.

Even if Saturdays arenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t really your party night of choice then you can listen to the show on BBC iPlayer any day of the week.

Simple, effective and unforgettable.

Imran Javed

radio highlights And the winner is...

Thursday 10pm, BBC R2 Matt Lucas hosts the newest awards ceremony of the year â&#x20AC;&#x201C; the Lucases. Each week Matt welcomes three funny guests on to the show to nominate people, places, songs, Ă&#x20AC; OPV DQG HYHU\ RWKHU NLQG RI WKLQJ for the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Lucasesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. This weekâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s guests are Katy Brand, James Corden and Graham Linehan and the awards include the Lamest Excuse of All Time and the Most Pointless Member of The Royal Family.

Bollywood Britain

Lent Talks

Tuesday 11.30pm, BBC R2

Wednesday 8.45pm, BBC R4

:LWK ER[ RIĂ&#x20AC; FH KLWV VXFK DV 7KUHH Idiots and My Name is Khan, Bollywood is already bigger than its Western namesake. In this three part series, Nikki Bedi investigates the history of Bollywood from the forties through to the modern day with contributions from many important Bollywood people such as Amitabh Bachchan and Sharukh Khan, Cornershop singer Tjinder Singh and director Shekhar Kapur.

To mark Lent, BBC Radio 4 is running six 13-minute talks, each Wednesday evening, from emiQHQW DQG LQĂ XHQWLDO ZULWHUV DQG thinkers exploring how faith and religion interact with a variety of DVSHFWV LQ VRFLHW\ ,Q WKH Ă&#x20AC; UVW WDON novelist, columnist and critic Will 6HOI UHĂ HFWV RQ WKH UHODWLRQVKLS EH tween art and religion and how many view the arts as a spiritual medium.

Young Brass Soloist of the Year 2010 Friday 9.30pm, BBC R2 )ULGD\ KRVWV WKH Ă&#x20AC; QDO RI WKLV \HDU¡V BBC Radio 2 Young Brass SoloLVW &RPSHWLWLRQ 7KH IRXU Ă&#x20AC; QDOLVWV will perform for the impressive title accompanied by the Black Dyke Band. The winner will get the chance to perform with the BBC Concert Orchestra on Radio 2â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Friday Night Is Music Night and as a featured soloist with a Championship Brass Band at a prestigious event.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s weekend and unless you are studying a degree in War Studies at the University of Hull (entry criteria: 300 UCAS points - itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s never too late to change from that law degree your Dad made you do), another article about the British Navyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dominance of the high seas in the 1700s is a bit unnecessary.

I did watch a very interesting BBC4 documentary about bronze statues made in Benin 500 years ago, but Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll keep that conversation for my girlfriend, if I ever get one.

I thought Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d give the readers what they want. So I watched Glee (E4 Monday 9pm, repeated on C4 Sunday at 5.30pm), a Yank version of Britannia High but the Americans do this kind of stuff so much better.

For those who donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know, the show is about a dance club set in an American high school. The club is for â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;odd ballsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, so obviously it mainly contains very attractive girls and boys. There is a nerd in a wheelchair (Artie) and an overweight black lady (Mercedes) put in there to ensure you know the JDQJ DUH D ELW OHIWĂ&#x20AC; HOG In this particular episode the boys and the girls compete against each other in a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;mash upâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; (two songs â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;mashed togetherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;).

The new school nurse gives the guys â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;pseudoephedrineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, a performance enhancing drug, and what a performance! One of the gang gets so excited he break dances in front of the disabled guy that they have just pumped full of amphetamines. It is the cruellest thing I have ever seen on TV. What next, spike special guest star Stevie Wonder with magic mushrooms and ask him to play darts? If you wondering what songs they â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;mashed upâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; in their chemically induced state, it was Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s My Life by Bon Jovi and Usherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Confessions Part II. Next episode I hope she gives them ketamine.

After that I wanted something more sedate. Instead I got Pop Star to Opera Star (Fridays 9pm, ITV). It ZDV WKH VHPL Ă&#x20AC; QDOV 7HQVH VWXII Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s co-presented by Alan Titchmarsh, the â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;erotic novelistâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

I knew something was up with Alan that night. First of all, Alan remarks, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a highly charged atmosphereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. I thought fair enough.

Then he said, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;there were six girls in low cut dresses but you held my gazeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. Hang on Alan, this sounds vaguely familiar. Wait a minute, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s page 47 of his book The Last Lighthouse Keeper. I know this because pages 46-49 are hidden under my mattress. I even know the next line, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Samantha grabbed his throbbing member as the ships sailed into the harbourâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. It was the sleaziest piece of product placement I have ever witnessed.

So what am I doing on Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s night? Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a no brainer; Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m getting the boys round for a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;mash upâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;...

36

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Culture TV & Radio

tv & radio news

debate Posh Hugh or proud Gordon?

Hugh

Gordon

Alice Vincent Culture Editor

Michael Wynn

Celebrity chefs â&#x20AC;&#x201C; theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re nothing new. Fanny Craddock, Keith Floyd, all the way through to the WUXO\ WHUULI\LQJ *DU\ 5KRGHV DQG the modern-day saint that is Jamie Oliver.

The successful become the iconic â&#x20AC;&#x201C; like pop stars their surnames becoming unnecessary: Delia, Nigella, and in my book, the adorable, incredible and, ultimately ineffable HUGH. Four letters, a whole lot of foody passion and a seriously dodgy haircut, but my, is the man a legend.

The Hugh I refer to is, naturally, that of the Fearnley-Whittingstall EUDQFK 3RVK \HV EXW VHOI VXIĂ&#x20AC;FLHQW to the core, he made his name by deserting the city for River Cottage, a tumbledown pile in Dorset, and living the good life dependant on the bemused aid of locals who knew what they were doing.

Now heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s got his own farm, with a whole catalogue of real farmers, breeders, bee-keepers, homebrewers, gardeners, poachers and the rest whose talents and aid are palmed off with nettle ale from his hedgerows and a multi-bird roast.

If this wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t reason enough to love him over the brusque, butch, frankly ostentatious Gordon Ramsay, then consider the fact that instead of inserting the F word into everything, Hugh muses on his re-incarnation as vegetables, spews Enid Blyton-esque exclamations of joy/amusement/horror and accompanies every single amusing sheep-faced antic with a prime â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Hughismâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no way heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d bugger off

Obnoxious? Yes. Arrogant? Certainly. Proud? Unbelievably so!

And why shouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t the man be all of those things and more?

Where does one start when appreciating Gordon Ramsayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s talents?

Master Chef, Television extraordinaire and mega successful entrepreneur.

The man has it all and unlike these wet-bag TV chefs, he has built it up himself, off his own gammy football knee. He took the disappointment of injury and moved on with his life.

No time for loitering in Hellâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Kitchen. A character trait we all need to incorporate a little more of into our lives.

Biting wit, ferocious charm and up front honesty is served for the main course on his television show Kitchen Nightmares.

If you havenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t seen the show then get your head out of your books and whack on 4oD. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a trans-Atlantic masterpiece in which Ramsay meets completely inept, incompetent Dick-heads so stuck in their old ways that Ramsay needs to treat them with the behaviour we have come to expect after all this time.

How else is he going to save these SHRSOH IURP Ă&#x20AC;QDQFLDO UXLQ" With a cup of a tea on a farm, whilst talking of saving chickens? Humans, Hugh, are more important.

6R ZKDW GR , Ă&#x20AC;QG VR HQGHDULQJ about him and his style?

Well itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the way in which he struts up to the camera, delivers a perfectO\ Ă&#x20AC;WWLQJO\ ZRUNLQJ FODVV OLQH XVXally full to the brim of obscenities) and then trots off to save the day/

LQFLGHQWDOO\ WKH RQO\ REVFHQLW\ Hugh would come out with) to India and call the locals â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;little fuckersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, as Ramsay so evidently enjoys.

Whilst Ramsay throws apart kitchens, creating in his path hundreds of mini-Ramsay restaurants and leaving nothing but the trace of his own obscene ego, Hugh merrily plods along, ever inventing more OLTXHUV RXW RI KHGJHURZ Ă RUD LQ one of his underground farmstead bunkers.

Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s unashamedly upper class and completely eccentric, and LI LW FDPH WR Ă&#x20AC;VWLFXIIV \RX NQRZ heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d blind Ramsay with eel-blood poison before riding off on a sheep, chortling.

Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s my kind of celebrity chef.

More TV jobs for the North

every Monday.

Each week Louise picks a different theme to base all her songs around - a lot like Bob Dylanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s theme time radio - just with a presenter whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s slightly easier to understand!

Last week the theme was on the not so challenging topic of Radio.

Louise interspersed tracks from Elvis Costello, The Dead 60s, XTC and The Selecter with intriguing facts about both the songs and the artists themselves.

The show provides a perfect antidote to a hard dayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s work at university and is a must for any budding musoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s.

This leads onto our evening of Rock, featuring four shows that promise to keep your head banging until 10pm.

As always, log on to nsrlive.

FR XN WR OLVWHQ OLYH Ă&#x20AC;QG RXU ODWHVW schedule, recent session tracks and interviews.

The BBC launched a new drive earlier this month to extend job and career opportunities to the best talent from the North of England, who can now register for a wide range of roles from content-making and journalism to technology.

Hundreds of new jobs will become available through the new BBC North jobs website. Check it out now for more in-depth information at www.bbc.co.uk/ jobs/north.

The website has plenty of tips for students who fancy a career with the BBC including broadcasting, journalism and management. Watch out for work experience and job posts in the near future.

Speaking at Teesside University, Director-General Mark Thompson said that the BBC KRSHV WR EHQHĂ&#x20AC;W WKH ZKROH LQdustry by â&#x20AC;&#x153;building a worldclass pool of media talent in the Northâ&#x20AC;?.

Director of BBC North, Peter Salmon, who also ran a masterclass for postgraduate media students at Newcastle University towards the end of 2009, added: â&#x20AC;&#x153;I am really determined that we UHDFK RXW WR Ă&#x20AC;QG D ZLGH UDQJH RI talented people with fresh ideas to come and help us create great new content for audiences.

He also revealed that the BBC has received more than 100 applications for its @North initiative. @North is commissioning new ideas by inviting independent companies across the North to bid for a share of ÂŁ500,000 to make interactive online content for CBBC and CBeebies.

TV funny men Vic Reeves and Bob Mortimer were also at the â&#x20AC;&#x153;Connect and Createâ&#x20AC;? event to talk about their early careers, offer tips and advice on breaking into the business and to announce the winners of the BBC Partnership awards.

Bob Mortimer, who was born in Middlesbrough, said: â&#x20AC;&#x153;These young writers, producers and journalists are clearly on track to become the shooting stars of the future. â&#x20AC;&#x153;As a proud northerner I think itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s great that there are going to EH PRUH RSSRUWXQLWLHV WR Ă&#x20AC;QG WDOented performers from the north and help them get into the media. As young comedians we felt you were at a huge advantage if you were from London and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s good to see the BBC putting this right.â&#x20AC;?

Vic Reeves, who grew up in Darlington, added: â&#x20AC;&#x153;The North of England is teaming with great comedians, writers, artists and performers. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s exciting to imagine great new programmes emerging in the near future that will put our northern towns and cities on the map.â&#x20AC;?

Christian Allen Station Manager

Joel Stein

expose faults in another aspect of somebodyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s livelihood.

In an era of political correctness gone mental, Ramsay is a â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;gift from Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not until the end when he delivers the perfect â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Doneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; in which you know he has respect from everyone KH KDV HYHU PHW PD\EH QRW IURP KLV wife though).

0LFKHOLQ 6WDUV JUDQWHG WKH\¡YH pretty much all gone away), accusaWLRQV RI LQĂ&#x20AC;GHOLW\ DJDLQ QRW WUXH

H[DJJHUDWHG IRRWEDOO VWRULHV KH PD\ have told the odd porkie) - but who hasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t?

The man is human and his entertainment value is paramount to the way in which we think about TV chefs today.

nsr Double portions on NSR Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s better than 60 minutes of quality radio? 120 minutes, thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s what!

With the beginning of the new semester NSR has rewarded some of its best shows from last term by doubling their on-air time in our new afternoon two-hour slots.

2Q 0RQGD\ SP \RX¡OO Ă&#x20AC;QG Matthew Guy and Mitchell Labiak with their misleadingly named â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Classics Hourâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;.

Here expect some classic tracks spanning the last few decades, while the lads discuss why they love the music they play, having a bit of craic along the way. Running features include â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Pop Goes the :XU]HO¡ Âś0DWW\ *X\ DQG 'ROOV ¡ and new for 2010 â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Danâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Daresâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; in which the latest edition to the Classics family, Posh Dan, accepts dares and challenges from the listeners.

Following on from this, Louise Morris presents â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Busy Doing Nothingâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;, a popular show from last semester continuing its two hour slot

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

37

Puzzles Culture

puzzles crossword

Puzzles Editors: Ned Walker and Suzi Moore - courier.puzzles@ncl.ac.uk

7KH Ă&#x20AC;UVW SHUVRQ WR FRPH WR The Courier RIĂ&#x20AC;FH ZLWK D FRPSOHWHG Crossword wins a free beer and burger at The Hancock.

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universally challenged 1. Who received an Honorary Doctorate in Civil Law from Newcastle University on 13th November 1967?

2. How much is an Orange Juice in Global Cafe? +RZ PDQ\ VDEEDWLFDO RIĂ&#x20AC;FHUV¡ KHOS WR UXQ WKH XQLRQ" 4. Which famous comedian studied at Newcastle University?

5. What is the name of the building on the right?

criss-cross 7KH REMHFWLYH LV WR Ă&#x20AC;OO WKH JULG VR WKDW HDFK column, each row and each of the nine 3Ă&#x2014;3 boxes contains the numbers 1-9 one time each. )RU WKH FRPSOHWHG SX]]OH FKHFN WKH QH[W HGLtion of The Courier.

8VH WKH FOXHV EHORZ WR Ă&#x20AC;W WKH VXUQDPHV RI WKHVH IDPRXV SUHVHQWHUV LQWR WKH JULG Use the other letters to work out the answer to 10 down.

odd one out Which swan is swimming in the wrong lake?

nedâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s number cruncher .HHS \RX EUDLQ LQ VKDSH E\ WU\LQJ WR FRPSOHWH WKHVH VXPV as fast as you can without using a calculator.

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Picture Phrase Puzzle: Mountain Biking, Cross Country, Fencing, Table Tennis. &RPPRQ 7KHPH (YHQWV LQ WKLV \HDU¡V 6WDQ &DOYHUW Nedâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Number Cruncher: Easy - 7, Medium - 33, Hard - 343 Spot the difference: 7KH F\JQHW RQ WKH ERWWRP OHIW RI WKH FHQWUDO JURXS KDV D ELJJHU wing.

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Forsyth 10. Norton Universally Challenged: Martin Luther King Jr, ÂŁ1.50, Six, Rowan Atkinson, Bedson Building

-6

69

38

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Stan Calvert countdown Hurricanes feel

6

The number of hockey games the Loko-motion won by Team Newcastle in last Football, yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s whitewash > Intra Mural page 40-41

Sports Editors: Paul Christian, Gavin Tom James courier.sport@ncl.ac.uk Sports Paul Christian, JamieJamie Gavin Tomand James - courier.sport@ncl.ac.uk SportsEditors: Editors: Paul Christian, Jamieand Gavin and Tom James -- courier.sport@ncl.ac.uk

days to go

From Sandyford to the San Siro Sports Editors Paul Christian and Tom James travelled to Milan for Manchester Unitedâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Champions League second round tie and learnt a lot about life and each other on the way â&#x20AC;&#x153;The San Siro is never full unless you play Manchester Unitedâ&#x20AC;? went the chant. Ironic then that reds failed to Ă&#x20AC; OO WKHLU DOORFDWLRQ LQ WKH WRS WLHU RI Europeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most imperious stadium.

Not that the atmosphere suffered.

Ice creams at Glazerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s misfortune and songs about the White Pele were serenaded long into a memorable Milanese night, as well as a graceful reception for one David Beckham.

The noise from the Milan fans was suffocating at times, and galvanised WKH 5RVVRQHUL LQ WKH Ă&#x20AC; UVW KDOI 5RRQ ey put an end to that. Enough said.

European away days are rarely uneventful; this was no different. From a Paddy Maguire impersonator at Bristol Airport to the heart-attack planes of Ryanair, we were off to a Ă LHU Gianfranco greeted us at Milan cenWUDO VWDWLRQ +H¡V D ORFDO FKDUDFWHU DQ Inter fan who was kind enough to put us up for two days. We bumped into a friend he hadnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t seen for WKUHH PRQWKV RQ WKH ZD\ EDFN +LV friend started crying. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Forza Interâ&#x20AC;? we shouted to his teary pal. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Come sempre (forever)â&#x20AC;? he replied without thought. Only in Italy.

Tom James snores when heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s awake. We discovered this anomaly during a rest before a quest for tickets. And tickets werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t hard to come by. Duomo Square, overseen

by Milanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s impressive cathedral, was swarming with spares. Twenty pounds at face value was refreshing. A few mindless idiots throwLQJ FDQV DQG VLQJLQJ +LOOVERURXJK songs wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t. $PLGVW WKH Ă XRUHVFHQW EXEEOH

coats of locals, the string-selling (?) street vendors and a bemused Lucio (the player), reds wore green and gold with pride and sang Glazer out.

Milan fans oblivious to the protest tried to swap scarves. Spirits were KLJK DQG WKH $XVWULDQ EHHU Ă RZHG as we ventured to the Giuseppe Meazza aboard an authentic tram.

Despite Jamesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s belief that Italian can be picked up simply by listening to others speak, we conjured little more than â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;ciaoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;grazieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. It was a shame really and dark-haired beauties everywhere ignored our Ă HHWLQJ JODQFHV EHFDXVH ZH GLGQ¡W know the language. They donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know what theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re missing.

Inside the ground, familiar faces popped up and James saw one of his distant cousins from Glossop, proving that you can take the inbreds out RI WKH WRZQ EXW WKH\¡OO DOZD\V Ă&#x20AC; QG each other again.

Christian being a top local red from Ireland encountered top local reds from China and all rejoiced in their replica tops with Owen on the back.

The spiral staircase seemed to last forever; we were sober by the time we reached the top. It was worth it though. A bit disappointing that we were boarded behind Perspex and that self-professed photo-taker Paul Christian forgot a camera, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a stadium seeped in history and atmosphere and you can feel it. It was intimidating.

The match came and went. Milan dominated for long spells and if it wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t for Rooney United would have it all to do in three weeks time.

When worlds collide: Il Duomo provided the setting for United fans to â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;prepareâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; ahead of the game at the San Siro

You donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t need us to tell you that.

We were held in for 45 minutes after the game and kept ourselves warm with a new chant about Park; another gem to the unbeatable tune of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t break my heart.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; :LWK D GD\ WR VSDUH ZH IXOĂ&#x20AC; OOHG our cultural needs. A trip to the Armani Store saw us being followed all over the shop in the literal sense by a security guard. I donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t blame him; we looked like scrotes. Next we went to the Inter store where we hammered Gianfrancoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s girlfriend at table football to make ourselves feel better.

That night, after Gianfrancoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s pal

FRQĂ&#x20AC; UPHG RXU IHDUV WKDW ,WDOLDQ¡V FDQ¡W GULYH E\ DOPRVW NLOOLQJ XV Ă&#x20AC; YH times during a one mile journey, we ate like kings at Gianfrancoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bar.

Christian declared his favourite food is â&#x20AC;&#x153;buffetâ&#x20AC;? and he was in his element as the Italians know how to put on a proper spread.

The next morning it was time for home and after what can only be described as a solemn silence with Gianfrancoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s mother at the breakfast table (she didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t speak English and our Italian still only stretched to two words) we put our life back in the hands of Ryanair.

The pilot decided to take us to Bir-

mingham instead of Bristol; his excuse was fog but we reckon it was either (a) he got lost or (b) he lives in Solihull and wanted to get home for his tea.

A coach trip to Bristol followed and then Easyjet did us the service of getting us back to Newcastle and away from what we can only describe as the grim South.

And so our journey ended. It was D YR\DJH RI GLVFRYHU\ DQG D Ă LJKW of fancy. Christian can now look forward to a proper nightâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sleep whilst James will be watching Italian television to try and learn the lingo. Forza Milano. Forza Italia.

Team Newcastleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s golf team swing when theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re winning Chris Woods With a tremendous string of results VHHLQJ 1HZFDVWOH JROI Ă&#x20AC; UVWV VLW DWRS BUCS division one at Christmas, the pressure was on to perform to even higher standards in a packed New Year calendar.

A very strong front pairing of Ross Mackay and Fraser Allan was followed by an experienced middle pair of Chris Taylor and Carl Downham, both in great form. New boys Ethan Smith and Lee Fuller, showing experience beyond their youth brought up the rear.

7KH Ă&#x20AC; UVW JDPH RI VDZ 1HZ castle travel to Durham in icy conditions. This proved no problem for the Newcastle boys, who dispatched WKHLU RSSRQHQWV ZLWK HDVH With a number of rearranged Ă&#x20AC; [WXUHV IURP 'HFHPEHU WKH QH[W JDPH DW KRPH WR 6KHIĂ&#x20AC; HOG +DOODP followed three days later. At this point Newcastle were second in the

league, one point behind their opponents who had played two games more.

Superb performances from Mackay, Allan and Downham saw their games put to bed early, with Ethan Smith also putting another point on the board for Newcastle and with it the win. A plucky performance from Chris Taylor saw KLP ZLQ RQ WKH ODVW VHFXULQJ D victory.

The following week, Newcastle travelled to UCLAN of Preston, with the hosts forcing Team Newcastle to play in obscene weather conditions of frost and snow. +RZHYHU WKH\ ZHUH VRRQ WR UH ceive their comeuppance, as NewFDVWOH ZHQW RQ WR ZLQ ZLWK JUHDW wins from Mackay, Allan and Smith.

Downham and Taylorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s infallible partnership came to a head in this Ă&#x20AC; [WXUH ² 7D\ORU DQQLKLODWLQJ KLV RS ponent 7&6 and Downham beating a Bahrain national champion 4&3

with some stunning golf.

Lee Fuller, the teamâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s resident Geordie had been struggling with swing problems and the conditions of winter golf, but came back from Ă&#x20AC; YH GRZQ DIWHU Ă&#x20AC; YH ZLWK D KHURLF performance, only to fall short on the last.

At this point in the season, Newcastle were seven points clear at the top of the table and team morale, having been exceptional all season, couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have been stronger. The ER\V FRXOG FRQĂ&#x20AC; UP WKHLU WLWOH RI GL vision one champions with a win against arch rivals Northumbria the following weekend.

Needless to say, the result the RoyDOV ZDQWHG ZDV WKHLUV ² 0DFND\ Allan and Downham all played superbly with comfortable wins and &KULV 7D\ORU VHDOHG WKH YLFWRU\ and league title with a cheeky win on the last hole. Leeds Met were last weekâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s opponents, seen off comfortDEO\ DW 0DWIHQ +DOO

Drive on: Newcastleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s golf club have enjoyed a fantatsic set of results

Again, great performances from Smith, Downham, Taylor and Allan put Leedsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; good players to shame; the only blip of the day a highly XQXVXDO GHIHDW IRU Ă&#x20AC; UVW WHDP FDSWDLQ Ross Mackay, beaten by a player barely out of playschool!

The team are now awaiting news of their opponents for Marchâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s promotion play-off to get into the highly competitive premier league, which KRXVHV WKH ELJ JROĂ&#x20AC; QJ XQLYHUVLWLHV such as Loughbrough, Birmingham and Lincoln. The most likely opponents for the play-off are Warwick. :LWK 1HZFDVWOH¡V IRUP FRQĂ&#x20AC; GHQFH and morale so high, it would take a massive performance from any team to beat them.

As well as promotion, the boys are in the Championship Cup, and have EHHQ VHOHFWHG WR SOD\ LQ WKH 8.

Student Matchplay at the prestigious Forest of Arden at the end of March, with a chance to progress to the international event in Germany.

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

39

Sport

Leazes comeback stuns Barca

On song Fagan secures Titans SODFH LQ VHPL Ă&#x20AC; QDOV

J. WHITLAND

Intra Mural Football Division One

Castle Leazes Barca-Law-Na

Intra Mural Rugby Union

3 2

Titans Armstrong

14 13

Charles Scott at Longbenton

Colin Henrys at Close House

A superb second half comeback from Leazes ensured that their title ambitions remained intact at Longbenton today, thanks to a dramatic 3-2 victory.

Barca went in at half-time with a seemingly comfortable 2-0 lead, courtesy of a well-taken goal from their captain McKee midway WKURXJK WKH Ă&#x20AC; UVW KDOI DQG D Ă&#x20AC; UP Harbison header minutes later. /HD]HV Ă&#x20AC; UVW KDOI GLVSOD\ VWDQN RI complacency. Going into this game on the back of an excellent win over Newcastle seconds, the players clearly expected a similar result today. Their defence was in disarray as Barcaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s movement and cutting edge caused them countless problems.

It was a game to forget for both VHWV RI GHIHQGHUV DV DOO Ă&#x20AC; YH JRDOV were the result of defensive errors. %DUFD¡V Ă&#x20AC; UVW FDPH DIWHU KHVLWDQW GH fending from Morgan allowed McKee ample time and space to pick his VSRW DQG Ă&#x20AC; QLVK ORZ WR $WNLQV¡ ULJKW Harbison added the second shortO\ DIWHU ZLWK D Ă&#x20AC; QH KHDGHU IURP DQ other well-delivered Morris cross.

But again the marking was lapse and questions should be asked over Leazes defensive positioning when the corner was taken.

Shortly before half-time Ed Nangol had a wonderful opportunity to UHGXFH WKH GHĂ&#x20AC; FLW IRU /HD]HV EXW KLV well struck effort was miraculously stopped by Wodhams who showed LQVWLQFWLYH UHĂ H[HV WR SUHVHUYH KLV sideâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s two goal lead.

Morgan did brilliantly twice in quick succession to thwart McKee as Barca went in search of a third before half-time.

The Leazes left-back was clearly desperate to make amends for his earlier error and these two heroic blocks set him well on his way to redemption.

Leazes then took the game to their opponents in the second half with renewed focus and a sense of urgency that had been severely lacking in

A try and two conversions by David Fagan proved enough for Titans to VHFXUH D PDUJLQDO YLFWRU\ RYHU Armstrong, and book their place in WKH VHPL Ă&#x20AC; QDOV RI WKH FXS DW &ORVH House. )DJDQ¡V Ă&#x20AC; UVW KDOI WU\ DQG D VHFRQG half try by captain Paddy Lewis cancelled out Steve Tansellâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s reply for Armstrong, for whom Jack Samler also added two penalties and a conversion.

It was Armstrong who started the brighter of the two; Toby Neill broke through the Titansâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; front-line, but was unable to recover his own kick; then when Titans were penalised for hands in the ruck, Samler converted the resultant penalty to break the deadlock.

Armstrongâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s lead was soon doubled, this time from a highly-disputed penalty on the right touchline.

Samler again stepped up to convert it, leaving Titans with much work to do.

Inspired perhaps by their perceived injustice though, they began to gain a foothold in the game. Fullback Henry Spurrier burst through two weak tackles with a powerful run from inside his own half, but his kick over his opposite number was just too long for him to recover as the try-line beckoned.

This was followed by a penalty just yards from the posts, from which Titans backed their powerful pack and elected to scrum.

A handling-error put paid to the attack, as it did with a ruck even closer to the try-line just moments later, but Titansâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; territorial domination soon paid off. Fagan broke through to touch the ball down underneath the posts.

He converted his own try to give Titans the lead, and this was very nearly increased as Edward Weekes twice broke powerfully, only to be held up agonisingly short of the tryline.

Titans were unable to maintain their dominance in the second-half though, as their ill-discipline returned. Having dragged an earlier effort wide, Samler missed his second successive penalty, only for a massive hit on the catcher to force the ball to Tansell, who gratefully picked up and dived over. Samler recovered to convert the try and restore Armstrongâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s six-point lead.

Crucially, Titans responded well, and only a try-saving tackle by Neill prevented an immediate reply. Their pack was beginning to dominate though, and when they were awarded a scrum deep into the Armstrong 22, this dominance paid off as Lewis scored a pushover try.

Fagan scored the crucial conversion to regain a slender one-point advantage, a lead which was to remain, despite Samler twice kicking for the posts from long-range penalties.

Both were missed, the latter dropping agonisingly short of the posts, and they were to prove costly misses as Titans booked their place in the VHPL Ă&#x20AC; QDOV 7KH\ ZLOO QRZ HQWHU WKLV ZHHN¡V VHPL Ă&#x20AC; QDO IXOO\ FRQĂ&#x20AC; GHQW RI progressing all the way in this competition.

&RPHEDFN NLQJV &DVWOH /HD]HV RYHUWXUQHG D GHÂż FLW DW KDOI WLPH WR NHHS WKHLU ,QWUD 0XUDO 'LYLVLRQ 2QH WLWOH KRSHV DOLYH

WKH Ă&#x20AC; UVW PLQXWHV Before the come-back began there was time for some showboating IURP %DUFD¡V Ă DPER\DQW ZLQJHU Matty Morris, who successfully bewildered the Leazes right-back with a Ronaldinho-esque look one way pass the other, much to the amusement of his teamâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s subs on the sidelines.

Leazes diminutive striker Manly showed superb dribbling skills to win his side a penalty following a clumsy challenge and Macmillan made no mistake dispatching the resulting penalty hard and low into the back of the net.

Morganâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s redemption was complete on the hour mark as he rose highest to nod home a delightful cross from substitute Finbar Feeney to make the score 2-2 and set up a

QDLO ELWLQJ Ă&#x20AC; QDOH 7HPSHUV EHJDQ WR Ă DUH DV WKH JDPH went on and both teams searched for a winner.

Barca captain McKee was the Ă&#x20AC; UVW QDPH LQ WKH UHIHUHH¡V ERRN IRU a frankly awful challenge that was born more out of frustration than malice.

The referee was making himself increasingly unpopular not only for his card-happy tendencies, but also a series of decisions that had players on both sides scratching their heads.

The Leazes make-shift left-back was shown a ridiculous yellow card for a fair tackle that the referee clearly took offence to.

Barca came agonisingly close to WDNLQJ WKH OHDG LQ WKH WK PLQXWH ZKHQ WKHLU LQGXVWULRXV PLGĂ&#x20AC; HOGHU Craig Light hit the bar from 10

yards. He and his team-mates could only look on in despair as the rebound was swept to safety when their substitute striker Wilton comSOHWHO\ Ă XIIHG KLV OLQHV DQG PLVVHG the ball.

As has often been the case this season it was Leazes Adam Fearn that broke the deadlock, much to the delight of his team-mates both on and off the pitch.

Engineering some space 30 yards RXW KH OHW Ă \ ZLWK D WUDGHPDUN VWULNH that left Wodhams in goal well beaten and handed Castle Leazes a hard-fought victory against a promising Barca side.

Leazes thermally layered winger Ed Nangol described the win as a â&#x20AC;&#x153;sensational comebackâ&#x20AC;? on a â&#x20AC;&#x153;torrid pitchâ&#x20AC;?. The Leazes machine rolls onwards.

+XUULFDQFHV GHQLHG Ă&#x20AC; UVW ZLQ E\ ODWH :LQGOH VWULNH Intra Mural Football Division One

Hurricances Dyslexic Untied

3 3

Dan Robinson at Close House $ ODWH Ă&#x20AC; JKW EDFN IURP '\VOH[LF UHV cued a point at Close House to rob 7KH +XUULFDQHV RI WKHLU Ă&#x20AC; UVW ZLQ WKLV season in an enthralling encounter on an unforgiving pitch.

It was unsurprisingly a mistake which led to the opener, as a defensive mix-up from Dyslexic allowed Aaron Ritchie to pounce on a loose ball on the edge of the area before DSSO\LQJ WKH Ă&#x20AC; QLVK ZLWK HDVH Ritchie came close to adding another soon after as he was sent racing through the middle, but could RQO\ Ă&#x20AC; UH ZLGH RI WKH JRDO ZKHQ RQH on-one with the keeper.

However, the lead was soon dou-

bled, with poor marking offering Bentley a free header as he arrived at the back host from a right-wing cross.

With Hurricanes threatening to run ULRW '\VOH[LF Ă&#x20AC; QDOO\ EHJDQ WR Ă&#x20AC; QG their feet and created some chances of their own. Their best opportunities each fell to Andy Nicholson coming in from the left wing, but he could not hit the target from each left-foot effort.

Dyslexic came out for the second half with far more purpose than they KDG LQ WKH Ă&#x20AC; UVW DQG ZHUH UHZDUGHG with a goal within ten minutes.

Andy Matthews ended a barren UXQ LQ IURQW RI JRDO LQ Ă&#x20AC; QH VW\OH powerfully running through the defence before slipping the ball past the oncoming keeper.

However, any beliefs that this would mark the beginning of a dramatic turnaround were soon dispelled, as Hurricanes restored the

two-goal margin thanks to a bullet header from Homans.

Perhaps the opposition should have clocked his run to the far post VRRQHU EXW WKH Ă&#x20AC; QLVK ZDV XQVWRS pable.

Still, with just less than an hour left on the clock, Dyslexic refused to surrender this match and Nicholson again came close, forcing a great save from the Hurricanes keeper in a signal of intent.

Throughout an intense period of Dyslexic pressure Hurricanes showed their nerves as they committed a series of fouls to give Dyslexic even more attacking opportunities.

With ten minutes left on the clock, the relentless pressure eventually paid off.

Laurence Jackson skipped past the full back before unleashing the strike past the helpless keeper at the near post.

Yet with their tails up, Dyslexic did

not halt their rhythm as they hunted for the equaliser, and it would arrive just three minutes from time from the most unlikely of candidates.

Pushing almost all their players in the box for a late corner, defender -RKQQ\ Âś7RUUHV¡ :LQGOH Ă&#x20AC; QDOO\ OLYHG up to his name to pounce on a loose ball in a goalmouth scramble and turn it home to the mass celebrations of the Dyslexic players.

But the drama did not stop there.

In the dying moments they almost went on to steal all three points with the last kick of the game.

Sal Mohammed centred for Jackson, but as he slid in for the mere touch it was begging for, he could only look on in disbelief as it somehow sailed wide of the post.

Miracles aside, the draw effectively rules Dyslexic out of the title race, but they left the pitch as the happier set of the two sides after a stirring FRPHEDFN DQG DQ HSLF Ă&#x20AC; QDOH

40

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Sport

Heroic Panthers comeback to down Bappage Intra Mural Football Division Three

FC Bappage Pink Panthers

2 3

Harry Clapham at Close House Pink Panthers lifted themselves off the foot of the Intra Mural football league with an inspirational comeback against an FC Bappage side that looked to have had the game tied up with a two goal advantage at half time.

It seems the Pink Panthers are a changed team since the Christmas break, picking up seven points from a possible nine since the break prior to last Wednesdays game.

However it looked like Bappage, quick on the attack, were going to secure a comfortable win over the Panthers, as they went into the lead through Gareth Keenan with a well struck free-kick into the bottom corner.

Further agony was to follow for Panthers in the literal sense when Tom Jackson dislocated his shoulder after a splendid block.

This wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t to be the end of the incident, as the ball ricocheted off the Pink defence and crossed the line quite clearly. Fortuitously for Panthers, the goal wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t given.

Minutes later, justice prevailed and Bappage doubled their lead with a piercing ball through the heart of the defence, which was PHW ZLWK D FOLQLFDO Ă&#x20AC;QLVK E\ 'DYH Jannerson. Seemingly Bappage were 2-0 up and cruising to another victory.

Panthers upped the pace of the game from half-time, and they were awarded a dubious penalty IRU KDQG EDOO -DFN\ Âś%¡ :KLWĂ&#x20AC;HOG stepped up but placed it against the upright. It looked like it wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t going to be their day.

However, the tides began to turn.

After wave upon wave of Pink attack, Nicholas â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not under the thumbâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Harrison forced the ball home after good pressure. Panthers slotted into the proverbial sixth gear and it wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t long before player/coach Craig Mundy emphatically equalised with a delightful scissor kick.

As the minutes ticked on, Panthers pushed for the winner. Alex 'XNH ZDV RXWVWDQGLQJ DQG GRPLnated both in defence and in his spell up front and Harry ClapKDP VSDUNHG D URXVLQJ Ă&#x20AC;QLVK ZLWK some mesmerising runs and was well supported by Shuttlecock Attaheri, Jacky B and Chris â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;No deal Noelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Morton. %DSSDJH NHHSHU 3LHUOXLJL 'H Vito, pulled off what has been dubbed the best save in Intra Mural history after Mundy met a cross ball on the volley.

The resulting corner however, was the nail in the Bappage cofĂ&#x20AC;Q DQG $WWDKHUL RQ KLV UHWXUQ WR the manâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s game - thundered home D Ă&#x20AC;QH KHDGHU WR VHFXUH WKH WKUHH points for Panthers.

The stout performances of Finchy, Brentmeister General and Taffy for Bappage couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t avoid the 3-2 scoreline. $ Ă&#x20AC;QH GD\ D Ă&#x20AC;QH FRQWHVW D Ă&#x20AC;QH LVK UHIHUHH DQG D Ă&#x20AC;QH VHW RI ODGLHV on the adjacent rugby sideline.

Why does Intra Mural rugby hog the crowds? They are nothing without their protein-shake.

J. WHITLAND

Mechanical gain point thanks to late own goal Intra Mural Football Division Two

Crayola Real Mechanical

2 2

Rob Logan at Longbenton The clash between Crayola and felORZ 'LYLVLRQ 7ZR WHDP 0HFKDQLFDO Ă&#x20AC;QLVKHG DV D GUDZ ODVW :HGQHVday, with neither team able to provide a winning touch and secure the three points so desperately needed by both teams as the season nears its conclusion.

Crayola looked to have sealed victory with ten minutes remaining, only to be outdone by their own player Rohan Radhakrishnan.

His blistering shot/clearance found the top corner of his own net to level the game which provided an unexpected exciting, end-to-end Ă&#x20AC;QLVK 'XULQJ WKLV SHULRG WKHUH ZHUH VHYeral opportunities for both teams to seal victory. Crayolaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s best chance fell to Ollie Hallstrom, whose volleyed shot within the oppositions box went inches wide.

At the other end Mechanicalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s striker, whose work rate was fault-

less throughout the match, was close to receiving his reward after beating his marker. With the keeper well beaten he was only able to direct his shot across goal from the tight angle.

Shortly after, Crayolaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s keeper, Jake Macmillan, kept his team in the match with an acrobatic save.

7KLV HQG WR HQG Ă&#x20AC;QLVK GLG QRW UHally resemble the overall match.

The game began in true Intra Mural style with both teams unable to control the ball on a bobbly and muddy pitch.

Mechanicalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s captain and centrePLGĂ&#x20AC;HOGHU +XJR %URZQ PDGH WZR LPSRUWDQW WDFNOHV ZLWKLQ WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW minutes on the edge of his teams box to ensure the match stayed level.

And Crayola looked the more settled of the two teams, creating some neat passing moves, although for the ODUJH SDUW RI WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW KDOI ERWK WHDPV were drawn into playing route one football.

This tactic paid dividends for &UD\ROD RQ PLQXWHV ZKHQ )HUJXV Adamson applied some quick thinking by pouncing on a spilt ball from Mechanicalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s keeper to slot home WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW RI WKH DIWHUQRRQ Once the goal went in, Crayola ap-

&XWWLQJ HGJH QHLWKHU VLGH JUDEEHG WKH LPSHWXV RQ D GLIÂżFXOW /RQJEHQWRQ VXUIDFH

peared to step back and invite the challenge of Mechanical who responded in a positive fashion.

The goal of the game came on 25 minutes when Hugo Brown lofted his shot over Crayolaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s keeper IURP \DUGV RXW DIWHU KLV WHDP had worked a neat passage of play around their oppositionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s defence.

The deteriorating pitch meant that XS XQWLO WKH Ă&#x20AC;QDO WHQ PLQXWHV RI WKH game there was little goal mouth action as neither team could control WKH EDOO IRU D VXIĂ&#x20AC;FLHQW SHULRG However after conceding, Crayola stepped up their threat again and looked the more likely to score.

The player credited with Crayolaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s VHFRQG JRDO PLQXWHV IURP WLPH

is a dubious decision to call. Chris Wattsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; cross in from the left looped over the keeper and seemed goal bound until Adam Smith made it a certainty.

But after taking the lead once more, Crayola again invited pressure onto themselves, which subsequently led to the game being levelled, and both WHDPV Ă&#x20AC;QLVKLQJ WKH JDPH ZLWK DWtacking mentalities.

Crayola may have felt that they could have done better after taking the lead twice during the match.

However, a draw seemed the fairest of results on a pitch that to an extent hampered any real chance of decent football being played.

D. RAWCLIFFE

/RFNLQJ KRUQV D KLJKO\ FKDUJHG SK\VLFDO HQFRXQWHU DW &ORVH +RXVH VDZ QHZO\ FURZQHG OHDJXH FKDPSLRQV &KHHN\ /DGLHV MXVW JHW WKH EHWWHU RI D VSLULWHG 0HGLFV VLGH

Ladies run close by battling Medics Intra Mural Rugby Cup

Cheeky Ladies Medics

23 16

Dominic Pollard at Close House Newly crowned League Champions Cheeky Ladies maintained their undefeated record after an impressive victory in a very physical Cup encounter against the Medics.

The tension was palatable as both sides were very aware that the loser would not be playing any further part in this yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Intra Mural competition.

There may have been little â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;champagne rugbyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; on display but there was nobody complaining as the match proved to be as entertaining a contest as one could wish to watch.

It was the Cheeky Ladies who

made the brighter start as Harry Turner converted a penalty from in front of the posts to give his side an early 3-0 lead.

The Ladies then capitalised on more mistakes by the Medics as they piled on the points - Chris Jackson ran over a try after a good period of possession in their opponents 22, and Turner completed the converVLRQ WR H[WHQG WKH OHDG WR The Medics made a positive response to their poor start with a spell of promising possession and territory which resulted in Jack Mercer kicking over a penalty. It was only moments later, however, that the Cheeky Ladies furthered extended their winning margin with another try.

The Ladies dominated the scrum WKURXJKRXW WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW KDOI DQG DV they were able to disrupt a Medics scrummage to steal the ball and set

up Will Englander to scamper across the line. Turner converted again to PDNH WKH VFRUH Each side then added scores as Mercer and Turner continued their impressive example of kicking. At KDOI WLPH WKH /DGLHV OHG 'XULQJ WKH EUHDN WKHUH ZHUH FDOOV for the Medics team to keep the passion up and to make sure that they were left with no regrets come fulltime.

These words seemed to have worked as the Medics made a very strong start to the second period.

They dominated possession and territory for much of the half as they pushed to keep their season alive. A VFUXP IURP Ă&#x20AC;YH PHWUHV RXW UHVXOWHG in a try for Will Martin, which Mercer converted to put the Medics just D WU\ EHKLQG DW Tempers eventually boiled over as a late tackle triggered an on-the-

pitch brawl with subs from each side entering fray. The skirmish resulted in a yellow card and a broken nose for Medic fullback Leo Smith.

When play did eventually restart, the Medics were awarded a penalty, which Mercer calmly slotted between the posts taking the score WR 7KH VHYHQ SRLQW JDS ZDV promptly restored however thanks to a Turner penalty. ,Q WKH Ă&#x20AC;QDO PRPHQWV WKH 0HGLFV broke the Ladiesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; line as Eddie Rob came agonisingly close - only to be denied by a last ditch ankle tap.

'HVSLWH KDYLQJ WKH EDOO DQG PDQ\ penalties in the Ladiesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; 22, the Medics were unable to breach the solid Cheeky Ladies defence and the JDPH HQGHG DW The physicality, passion and intensity at which the game was played was relentless and certainly made for superb viewing.

42

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Sport N. KERSHAW

Running riot: for the second year running, Newcastleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ever impressive Raiders side hammered Northumbria Mustangs to secure two more vital Stan Calvert points for the University, to add to the two already gained in skiing

Raiders rule in Stan Calvert contest American Football

Raiders Mustangs

52 0

Nick Kershaw Newcastle Raiders cruised to a resounding 52-0 victory over Northumbria Mustangs in their vital Stan Calvert match-up last Sunday.

The result adds another vital two points to the Universityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tally, to go with the points already posted by the ski and snowboarding club after their victory over the Poly a fortnight ago.

The Raiders went into this match EULPPLQJ ZLWK FRQĂ&#x20AC;GHQFH DQG KLJK hopes. A constantly varied offence matched with a dominant and stingy defence has rendered the Raiders almost untouchable this season.

The Northumbria Mustangs did nothing to change this. Though they were brave and fought hard, the Mustangs will go home licking their wounds and pondering how long it will be until they have a shot at beating the well-drilled Raiders.

Defensive captain and human highlight reel, Luke Firth, opened up the scoring in emphatic fashion, stripping the ball from the hands of the Northumbria full-back and sprinting off to the end-zone.

The Newcastle offence was a joy to watch. Previously accused of being boring, the coaches have added a huge amount of variety to their system meaning you never know what they will do next.

With Northumbria setting up their defence to stop the powerful running game provided by bell-cow Craig Miller, the coaches turned to

Quarterback Ed Tate to air out some passes.

The Raiders were rewarded for this when Tate lofted a pass to Ford Wilding for the second touchdown of the game.

Lee Davies added more points just a few minutes later with a barrelling run from seven yards out, showing the whole crowd why he is deserving of his nickname: â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Tankâ&#x20AC;?.

The stout defence augmented the exciting offensive play with Firth continuing to make plays all over WKH Ă&#x20AC;HOG E\ WKH Ă&#x20AC;QDO ZKLVWOH KH KDG tallied two sacks and numerous tackles for a loss.

For all their dominance the Raiders failed to really open up the Mustangs in the fashion they had hoped IRU GXULQJ WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW KDOI The Newcastle coaches were left unhappy with the amount of

dropped passes, as well as by the standard of refereeing on display.

7KH FDOOV E\ WKH RIĂ&#x20AC;FLDOV ZHUH at best questionable and at worst downright incorrect â&#x20AC;&#x201C; as though they were taking pity on the struggling Mustangs.

Despite these setbacks the Raiders FRQWLQXHG WR VFRUH ZLWK 7DWH Ă&#x20AC;QGing the electric Charlie Dryden for a 20-yard touchdown pass.

Any time the ball was placed in Drydenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hands the Mustangs looked like they had lost the abilLW\ WR WDFNOH KLV FKDQJH RI GLUHFWLRQ and vision made him a real threat throughout the match.

Soon after this score Tate carried the team into the end-zone again â&#x20AC;&#x201C; this time using his mobility to run from 15 yards out.

Backup quarterback Alb Parkhouse threw to Andy Broadhead for

the Raidersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; sixth touchdown of the day as they continued to light up the Mustangs. +RZHYHU 7DWH ZDV QRW Ă&#x20AC;QLVKHG DV KH DJDLQ XVHG KLV IHHW WR VFRUH this time superbly reading the block of Jonny Williams to sidestep the Northumbria defence and round off an excellent all-round performance from the Newcastle team.

Firth commented after the game that â&#x20AC;&#x153;the coaches push the players to the limit each and every training sessionâ&#x20AC;?.

There is no doubt that this commitment is paying off, as another blow has been landed to Northumbriaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hopes of regaining the Stan Calvert trophy, with the Raiders marching on to face Durham next week.

Team Newcastle will be hoping that this result spells a good omen for the remainder of the week.

Wilson inspires Knights to narrow BUCS Cup win Menâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Basketball

Heriot Watt Newcastle Knights

57 62

Thomas Oxby The Knights carried on the cup run with a scrappy win away from home against a decent Heriot Watt team.

With only seven players travelling, three of whom were struck with illness, it was always going to be difĂ&#x20AC;FXOW IRU 1HZFDVWOH 7KH Ă&#x20AC;UVW TXDUWHU ZDV WLJKW ZLWK Watt up 16-15. Molesworth opened the scoring with a nice shot fake, pull-up.

The assist went to Notis Chalkidis, ZKR LQFLGHQWDOO\ KDG D JUHDW Ă&#x20AC;UVW half, crashing the boards at both

ends of the court and scoring at will.

The second quarter continued in the same vein, very tight, and Newcastle couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t seem to get their offence going. Heriot Watt, however, were struggling to cope with Notis who dominated inside and pretty much kept Newcastle in the game.

Wattâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s only offence seemed to be driving into the paint and seemingly scoring simple layups, the Knightsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; defence had to tighten up, switching to zone defence, trying to restrict the opposition to shooting from the outside.

However, the scores were still tied and the half ended with a low scoring 28 points each â&#x20AC;&#x201C; a score which VHHPHG WR Ă DWWHU 1HZFDVWOH An adrenaline-fuelled team talk by

Coach Dave Elderkin during the interval spurred the Knights to go on a run in the third quarter, extending their lead.

Adam Wilson carried the Knightsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; offence with a number of fast breaks and laying in before their defence could get set, and Wilson ended the game top scoring with 20 points.

The Knightsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; defence was the key, with Oxby blocking any drive that Watt tried taking and Notis, Raffe and Nellie all collecting the important defensive rebounds.

However, fatigue and the noticeable illnesses were starting to take their toll on Newcastle, and the intensity started to drop.

The third quarter ended with the Knights up 47-38, but the fourth quarter saw Watt come back into the

game, and it was a lot closer than it should have been.

The crowd started to come alive and fuelled Watt to start a comeback.

With a number of Knights in foul WURXEOH LW ZDV GLIĂ&#x20AC;FXOW WR NHHS WKH defensive intensity high.

However, Charlie Hand demonstrated the play of the game, crashing through the paint, collecting the rebound and scoring â&#x20AC;&#x201C; as well as drawing the foul to relieve the pressure that was building on the Knights.

The Knightsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; free throws were awful all night with the team missing 11 of 13. After being fouled on the halfway line and ridiculously sliding into the crowd Raffe was sent to the line.

Cool as ever and although missing a few free throws earlier in the game, he kept calm enough to make the shots when it mattered late in the game, to relieve even more pressure and cement the Knightsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; place LQ WKH TXDUWHU Ă&#x20AC;QDOV ZLWK WKH Ă&#x20AC;QDO score ending 62-57 to Newcastle.

All in all, not Newcastleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s best performance, but based on all things considered it was a case of job done for the Knights. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It was a good win considering we had a few players that were ill and were missing a couple of key people,â&#x20AC;? stated Elderkin at the end of the game. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The key to the win was our defence as we stood up to everything they threw at us, and we scored big points when it mattered.â&#x20AC;?

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

43

Sport

Cochrane win seals play-off spot A. WILSON

Womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Rugby

Newcastle 1sts Leeds 1sts

Tarren Smarr

20 5

Ellie Robinson 1HZFDVWOH VHFXUHG D PDJQLĂ&#x20AC;FHQW 20-5 victory over Leeds at Cochrane Park to gain a place in the BUCS play-offs.

After a slow start, great rucking by IRUZDUGV 6RSKLH 5RJHUV DQG .DWH Ridley regained possessions for the Royals, and Araba Chintoh made full use of her strength and pace, handing off four Leeds players as she ran from her own 22 before being tackled just out of reach of the try line.

Determined to capitalise on this run of play, Newcastle worked hard in attack, but Leeds proved to be well drilled in defence, and breaking their line was challenging.

With several phases of both forwards and back plays failing to see them across the line, second row +HOHQ 0DUWLQ VHW KHU VLJKWV RQ WKH try line and ran around the Leeds defence, diving over the line to give Newcastle the lead.

With only minutes remaining of the half, the pace of the game saw both sides tiring, but the Royals

Frantastic: Womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s rugby President Fran Infante eyes up her opponent during her sideâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s play-off clinching win at Cochrane Park

found themselves with possession once again. )DVW IHHW IURP KRRNHU *HRUJH 0DQgan allowed her space to exploit a weak tackle, and some impressive pace from halfway brought the score to 10 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 0.

Leeds came back on the attack in the second half, drawing in the Newcastle forwards with great rucking, then moving the ball out wide where their wingers showed awesome speed - Sophie Bale making several try-saving cover tackles into touch.

Eventually, though, their forwards were able to recycle the ball and crash through the Royalsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; defence to JHW WKHLU Ă&#x20AC;UVW VFRUH RQ WKH ERDUG +DYLQJ ZRUNHG KDUG IRU WKH OHDG and with goal difference potentially YLWDO LQ JDLQLQJ D SOD\ RII VSRW .LWW\ Randall caught the restart and Newcastle took the game back into the Leeds half.

Great supporting play showed how hard every player was willing to work for this win, and it was this that put Araba Chintoh with a chance 10 metres from the line.

She kept her head and cut a great OLQH WR Ă&#x20AC;QG KHU VSRW EHWZHHQ WKH posts.

This was a tough game for Newcastle, but one which showed above all the level of commitment which every individual has to the cause.

A strong team in defence, the Royals knew that every player on the pitch would put herself on the line to prevent conceding a try.

And now attacking play has been added to their repertoire, they are becoming a team to be reckoned with.

Brunel punish under strength Royals Netball Round-Up

Brunel 1sts Newcastle 1sts

Bronze success for BUCS gymnasts

54 24

Kathryn Jones Newcastle crashed out of the BUCS FKDPSLRQVKLSV DW WKH TXDUWHU Ă&#x20AC;QDO stage for the second year running at the hands of Brunel.

The London University ran out comfortable winners, and were always hot favourites going into the tie as BUCS Southern Premier Champions.

But questions will be asked as to why only seven players travelled in the Royals squad â&#x20AC;&#x201C; some of whom were carrying injuries â&#x20AC;&#x201C; to face one of the countryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s top netball sides.

Despite nerves at the start of the game, the girls began with determination, and established a three goal OHDG ² WKH Ă&#x20AC;JKW DSSHDUHG WR EH RQ Brunel, and the umpires, had other ideas. Some very physical play and tight marking led to Brunel estabOLVKLQJ D VLJQLĂ&#x20AC;FDQW OHDG WKDW 1HZcastle couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t catch.

Brunelâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tall shooter - who was approximately a foot taller than the Royalsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; defence â&#x20AC;&#x201C; was too much for Newcastle, and despite their best efforts she was receiving the majority of the passes into the circle and converting them reliably.

Club Captain Rachel Saville was in serious pain with a knee injury in the third quarter, but with no substitutes having travelled, she dug deep and showed great spirit to carry on Ă&#x20AC;JKWLQJ ULJKW WR WKH Ă&#x20AC;QDO ZKLVWOH The whole team fought tooth and nail but sadly couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t progress to WKH VHPL Ă&#x20AC;QDOV .DWKU\Q +XUUHOO DQG Rachel Saville were given players of the match and despite the loss it was good practice against a team that are much better than the Poly. Bring on Stan Calvert.

Newcastle 2nds Hull 1sts

30 45

Sitting comfortably at the top of the OHDJXH WDEOH +XOO Ă&#x20AC;UVWV DUH WKH WHDP WR EHDW +DYLQJ ORVW WKH ODVW HQFRXQter 29-56, Newcastle were pumped up and ready to prove that they werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t about to be walked all over again.

With only eight players available Newcastle knew that it was going to be a tough, tiring, physical game.

Throughout the whole game every single Newcastle player gave their all. It was a physical game, with (OOLH +DWW /XF\ %DUNHU DQG )LRQD Brunt all getting taken out by their bigger counterparts.

Lucy Barker had a great game, making some vital interceptions and picking out some lovely passes; however it was goal keeper, Sally Burden, that caught the oppositionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s eye, earning her player of the match for another stunning performance.

Good feeds into the circle by Rebecca Mills; good shooting by Ellie +DWW DQG )LRQD %UXQW EULOOLDQW GHfensive work by Sally Burden, Sassa +DPLOWRQ DQG *HRUJH 7KRPSVRQ and great coordinating play by Lucy Barker wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t enough to take down the rough giants. +RZHYHU WKH 1HZFDVWOH JLUOV KDG WKH +XOO SOD\HUV UDWWOHG JHWWLQJ much closer to a victory than in their ODVW PHHWLQJ UHVXOWLQJ LQ +XOO¡V XQsporting complaints about perfectly JRRG XPSLUHV $V ZLWK WKH Ă&#x20AC;UVW WHDP game, this match was great practice for Stan Calvert against a stronger team than the Poly.

Sunderland 1sts Newcastle 3rds

31 25

Newcastle thirds started this game with their heads down and what looked like no desire to win the

game. After a tough team talk at quarter-time the away side got their heads in the game and there was an improvement in the game play.

Despite the increased effort the girls were unable to win either the second or the third quarters, but a VHDVRQ RI WRXJK Ă&#x20AC;WQHVV WUDLQLQJ VDZ them out-run the home side, winQLQJ WKH Ă&#x20AC;QDO TXDUWHU Some great interceptions from SabULQD .ULVWLDQVHQ DQG 5DFKHO /RJXH that were transported down court by an on form Rebecca Meldrum (player of the match) all helped the girls pull the scores back.

Unfortunately this wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t enough WR SXOO EDFN WKH GHĂ&#x20AC;FLW WKDW KDG EHHQ

established over the previous quarters and the Newcastle third team walked away 31-25 losers.

Newcastle 4ths Leeds Trinity 1sts

38 30

Sitting comfortably at the top of their league having lost only one game, 1HZFDVWOH ZHUH FRQĂ&#x20AC;GHQW JRLQJ into the game, but they were given a tough time of it by Leeds Trinity. +RZHYHU WKH 5R\DOV PDQDJHG WR hold out for their seventh win out of eight meaning they go into their Stan Calvert clash with Northumbria next Sunday in high spirits.

It was a successful weekend for Team Newcastle in the recent BUCS gymnastics event earlier this month, with the Universityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s gymnasts seFXULQJ IRXU WRS WHQ Ă&#x20AC;QLVKHV LQFOXGing a bronze medal for the impressive Erwin Berendsen. &OXE PHPEHUV +DQQDK -RKQVRQ &KDUORWWH 5XWKHUIRUG DQG -HQ Stranger represented Newcastle in the womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s competition that was held on the Saturday.

Competing in a series of all-day events, the womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s team put their skills to the test. )LUVW \HDU FOXE PHPEHU &KDUORWWH Rutherford placed seventh on the uneven bars with a fast paced routine consisting of a variety of tricky elements including moves from low bar to high bar and back. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We had a really fun weekend and I am happy with the bars routine,â&#x20AC;? commented Rutherford afterwards, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t wait to see how much we improve for next year.â&#x20AC;?

The second day focussed on the menâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s competition, where Richard 6KHOOH\ )LQ 'DYLGVRQ DQG %HUHQGsen represented the University.

While the women compete in four events, the men have their work cut out for them with six events in the day-long competition.

The three men rose to the challenge and earned some high marks DQG VHYHUDO WRS WHQ Ă&#x20AC;QLVKHV )UHVKHU )LQ 'DYLGVRQ SODFHG Ă&#x20AC;IWK on vault while Erwin Berendsen had WZR WRS WHQ Ă&#x20AC;QLVKHV RI KLV RZQ Not only did Berendsen place sixth on parallel bars, he also managed to place third on the pommel horse, bringing the bronze medal back to Newcastle.

An understandably happy Berendsen commented afterwards that, â&#x20AC;&#x153;It was a good effort by everyone who competed with Newcastle. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We were all very supportive of each other and it showed in our performances that we have a strong team behind us.â&#x20AC;?

Davidson added that â&#x20AC;&#x153;the team spirit was really high, and with competing in six events, it is nice to have your team members behind youâ&#x20AC;?.

A Question of Sport @ St Jamesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Park Î&#x17D;Î&#x17D;WZ/ ^Í&#x160;Í&#x160;Î&#x17D;Î&#x17D;

DƾůĆ&#x161;Ĺ?ĹľÄ&#x17E;Ä&#x161;Ĺ?Ä&#x201A; Ć?Ć&#x2030;Ĺ˝Ć&#x152;Ć&#x161;Ć? Ć&#x2039;ĆľĹ?Ç&#x152; Ä&#x201A;ĹśÄ&#x161; Ć?Ĺ&#x161;Ĺ˝Ć&#x152;Ć&#x161; Ć&#x161;Ä&#x201A;ĹŻĹŹ Ĺ&#x161;Ĺ˝Ć?Ć&#x161;Ä&#x17E;Ä&#x161; Ä?Ç&#x2021; Ĺ&#x161;Ć&#x152;Ĺ?Ć?Ć&#x161;Ĺ?Ä&#x201A;ĹśĆ? Ĺ?Ĺś ^Ć&#x2030;Ĺ˝Ć&#x152;Ć&#x161;Í&#x2DC;

Ĺ&#x161;ŽŽĆ?Ä&#x17E; ĨĆ&#x152;Žž Ć&#x161;Ĺ?Ä?ĹŹÄ&#x17E;Ć&#x161;Ć? ĨŽĆ&#x152; Ć&#x161;Ĺ&#x161;Ä&#x17E; Ç Ĺ?ŜͲ ĹśĹ?ĹśĹ? Ć&#x161;Ä&#x17E;Ä&#x201A;Ĺľ Ć&#x161;Ĺ˝ Ć?Ä&#x17E;Ä&#x17E; EÄ&#x17E;Ç Ä?Ä&#x201A;Ć?Ć&#x161;ĹŻÄ&#x17E; hĹśĹ?Ć&#x161;Ä&#x17E;Ä&#x161; & Í&#x2022; EÄ&#x17E;Ç Ä?Ä&#x201A;Ć?Ć&#x161;ĹŻÄ&#x17E; &Ä&#x201A;ĹŻÄ?ŽŜĆ?Í&#x2022; Ĺ?ĹśÄ&#x17E;ĹľÄ&#x201A; sŽƾÄ?Ĺ&#x161;Ä&#x17E;Ć&#x152;Ć?Í&#x2022; ZÄ&#x17E;Ć?Ć&#x161;Ä&#x201A;ĆľĆ&#x152;Ä&#x201A;ĹśĆ&#x161; sŽƾÄ?Ĺ&#x161;Ä&#x17E;Ć&#x152;Ć? Ä&#x201A;ĹŻĹŻ ĆľĆ&#x2030; Ć&#x161;Ĺ˝ Ä&#x201A; Ć&#x161;Ĺ˝Ć&#x161;Ä&#x201A;ĹŻ ŽĨ ΏϭϹϏ dĹ?ĹľÄ&#x17E;Í&#x2014; 7.30pm Ä&#x201A;Ć&#x161;Ä&#x17E;Í&#x2014; Tues 22nd Feb 2010 WĹŻÄ&#x201A;Ä?Ä&#x17E;Í&#x2014; The Magpie Suite, St :Ä&#x201A;ĹľÄ&#x17E;Ć?Í&#x203A;Ć? WÄ&#x201A;Ć&#x152;ĹŹÍ&#x2DC; Ĺ˝Ć?Ć&#x161;Í&#x2014; FREE!! Open to ALL

dÄ&#x17E;Ä&#x201A;ĹľĆ?Í&#x2014; Tables of 10, or come or join up with others on the night ŽŜĆ&#x161;Ä&#x201A;Ä?Ć&#x161; Ĺ?ŜĨŽÍ&#x2014; Ian Rossiter (i.p.rossiter@ncl.ac.uk) Or ask whoever invited you

44

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Ruthless Raiders claim Calvert points Sports Editors: Paul Christian, Jamie Jamie Gavin and Tomand James - courier.sport@ncl.ac.uk Sports Editors: Paul Christian, Gavin Tom James - courier.sport@ncl.ac.uk

> Page 42 A. WILSON

Royals pay the penalty Durham delight as late scores spoil captainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s return Menâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Rugby Union

Newcastle 1sts Durham 1sts

22 28

Jonathon Taylor at Cochrane Park Last Wednesday proved to be a day of mixed fortunes for the Royals, ZLWK WKH UHWXUQ WR Ă&#x20AC; WQHVV RI FDSWDLQ Keith Laughlin marred by a narrow 22-28 defeat to Durham. /DXJKOLQ¡V Ă&#x20AC; UVW DSSHDUDQFH VLQFH breaking his ankle on the opening GD\ RI WKH VHDVRQ ZDV PXVLF WR WKH HDUV IRU DOO DW &RFKUDQH 3DUN ZLWK KLV FRPHEDFN SHUIHFWO\ WLPHG DKHDG of Sundayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Stan Calvert showdown against rivals Northumbria. $QG 1HZFDVWOH EHJDQ WKH JDPH in impressive fashion, appearing to SLFN XS ZKHUH WKH\ OHIW RII DJDLQVW Northumbria seven days earlier. $IWHU D VKDUS EUHDN IURP Ă \ KDOI Ed Yarnton, Gavin Hadley broke through the Durham defensive line, with winger Adam Armstrong narURZO\ SUHYHQWHG IURP VFRULQJ WKH RSHQLQJ SRLQWV RI WKH PDWFK E\ D ODVW JDVS WDFNOH The Royalsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; fans however did not KDYH WR ZDLW ORQJ IRU WKH Ă&#x20AC; UVW WU\ RI WKH PDWFK 2QO\ PLQXWHV DIWHU $UP VWURQJ¡V EUHDN VFUXP KDOI +DUU\ 3HFN EULOOLDQWO\ EHDW WKUHH 'XUKDP GHIHQGHUV EHIRUH RIĂ RDGLQJ WR Ă DQNHU -RQQ\ 2OO\ ZKR H[HFXWHG D VLPSOH Ă&#x20AC; QLVK LQ WKH FRUQHU 7KLV OHDG ZDV FKDONHG RII RQO\ PR ments later however, with Durham WRXFKLQJ GRZQ FRPSOHWHO\ DJDLQVW the run of play.

Despite appearing to have run GRZQ D FXO GH VDF WKH YLVLWLQJ Ă \ half managed to squeeze a grubber NLFN EHKLQG WKH UXVKLQJ 5R\DOV GH IHQFH ZLWK WKH 'XUKDP ZLQJHU IRO lowing up with ease.

The remainder of the half saw a number of promising opportunities for both sides squandered, with neither side adding any further points

before half-time.

Despite this however, the Royals ZHQW LQWR WKH EUHDN UHDVRQDEO\ FRP IRUWDEO\ ZLWK DQ DUUD\ RI IHURFLRXV WDFNOLQJ E\ WKH IRUZDUGV UHSHOOLQJ any potential Durham onslaught.

As a result, only three minutes LQWR WKH VHFRQG SHULRG 'XUKDP were awarded a penalty try, with the Royalsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; forwards struggling to deal with the visitorsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; devastating VFUXPPDJLQJ 0LG ZD\ WKURXJK WKH VHFRQG KDOI a pulsating passage of play saw two tries in as many minutes, with both WHDPV VXFFHVVIXOO\ WRXFKLQJ GRZQ )LUVWO\ 1HZFDVWOH¡V UHSODFHPHQW winger, and immediately after the YLVLWLQJ LQVLGH FHQWUH VFRUHG ZHOO WDNHQ WULHV ZLWK WKH 5R\DOV IDFLQJ D VHYHQ SRLQW GHĂ&#x20AC; FLW WR RYHUFRPH LQ the remaining twenty minutes.

7KH FRQVWDQW VXEVWLWXWLRQV WKURXJKRXW WKH VHFRQG KDOI VLJQLĂ&#x20AC; FDQWO\ KLQGHUHG WKH JDPH¡V Ă XHQF\ EXW D PRPHQW RI PDJLF E\ ZLQJHU Adam Armstrong saw the Royals draw level with twelve minutes to JR FRXUWHV\ RI D VXSHUE VROR WU\ 3LFNLQJ XS WKH EDOO LQVLGH KLV RZQ $UPVWURQJ NLFNHG GHHS LQWR WKH Durham half, and after showing inFUHGLEOH SDFH FROOHFWHG DQG WRXFKHG down himself, beating two defendHUV LQ WKH SURFHVV :LWK WKH VFRUH ORFNHG DW WKH &RFKUDQH 3DUN IDLWKIXO ZHUH KRSLQJ WR ZLWQHVV D JUDQGVWDQG Ă&#x20AC; QLVK E\ WKH hosts, but were left disappointed. :LWK WKH 'XUKDP VFUXPPDJH EH FRPLQJ LQFUHDVLQJO\ GHYDVWDWLQJ DJDLQVW D ZHDNHQHG 5R\DOV SDFN WZR VXEVHTXHQW ODWH SHQDOWLHV Ă&#x20AC; UHG WKH YLVLWRUV WR D WLJKW YLFWRU\ Despite the narrow defeat howHYHU 1HZFDVWOH JR LQWR WKLV ZHHN HQG¡V FODVK ZLWK 1RUWKXPEULD IXOO RI FRQĂ&#x20AC; GHQFH :LWK D IXOO\ Ă&#x20AC; W VTXDG Ă&#x20AC; UPO\ XQLWHG LQ WKHLU TXHVW IRU YLF tory, the Royals hope to provide a IDLU\WDOH HQGLQJ WR 7HDP 1HZFDV tleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s push to retain the Stan Calvert Cup this Sunday.

Try time: Newcastle were undone in the closing stages as their pack faltered to give away two penalties in the last ten minutes

Stan Calvert Cup 2010

THE

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Tyas urges sports teams to complete hat-trick of triumphs

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Jonathan Taylor

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1

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.H\ DQG WUDQVSRUW JXLGH 1 – Newburn – Bus numbers 21/22 from Central Station and Market St to Newburn Village *DWHVKHDG 6WDGLXP Metro to Gateshead Stadium 18 6SRUWV &HQWUH ² Metro to Haymarket 4 - City Pool – Metro to Haymarket 5 - UNN City Campus - Metro to Haymarket 1RUWKXPEHUODQG &OXE ² Metro to West Jesmond 7 - Cochrane Park – %XV QXPEHUV IURP 6W 0DU\·V 3ODFH WR %HQÀ HOG 5RDG 5HGKDOO ² %XV QXPEHUV IURP 6W 0DU\·V 3ODFH WR %HQÀ HOG 5RDG 6RXWK 1RUWK && Metro to South Gosforth 'DYLG /OR\G Metro to South Gosforth &RDFK /DQH Bus from Northumbria City Campus or Metro to Four Lanes End /RQJEHQWRQ Metro to Four Lanes End %XOORFNVWHDGV Metro to Kenton Bankfoot

13

THE COURIER Monday 22 February 2010

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Jamie Gavin

Men’s Football Cochrane Park & Coach Lane - 14.00

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Kev Davey

Rugby League Gateshead Stadium - 14.00 & 17.00

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Kathryn Jones

Netball Gateshead Stadium - 14.00-20.30

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Charley Wright

Men’s Hockey Coach Lane - 12.00-16.30

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III

IV

Monday 22 February 2010 THE COURIER

Stan Calvert predictions from those in the know Colin Blackburn, Director of Sport ´1HZFDVWOH VKRXOG EH FRQĂ&#x20AC; GHQW LQ WKHLU DELOLWLHV throughout all the events to retain the trophy but not be complacent. We will need every team and every individual within these teams to perform to retain the trophy. At the end of the day it is often two or three upsets that determine the destination of the trophy. We must ensure that the upsets are not us under-performing or being complacent.â&#x20AC;?

Prediction: Newcastle win

Fraser Kennedy, Performance Sport Manager â&#x20AC;&#x153;For Newcastle to have any chance of recording a third straight win we must do well in the hockey, badminton, rugby, squash, athletic and rowing events. Last year we were hammered in the rowing and this would be one of my biggest fears if we were to be turned over again in this sport. This year is the biggest event we have ever staged so the excitement is unbelievable and with more than 130 points up for the grabs there is so much to gain in every single match. I do however think it will come out evens with the PHQ¡V UXJE\ ZLQQLQJ WKH Ă&#x20AC; QDO PDWFK WR GUDZ WKH event.â&#x20AC;?

Prediction: Draw

9LFN\ 7\DV $8 2IĂ&#x20AC; FHU â&#x20AC;&#x153;Last yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s victory was an amazing achievement for Team Newcastle. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s going to be a tough competition again and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be really close EXW ,¡P FRQĂ&#x20AC; GHQW WKDW ZH FDQ UHWDLQ WKH FXS IRU an unprecedented third consecutive year. With the competition bigger and better than ever there are plenty of opportunities to create an upset; itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s shock results like getting a win in something like the football or netball which on paper the Poly should win that will give us the edge. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re going into the event 6-0 up after the skiing, American football and claiming a walkover in the womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cricket and hopefully we can maintain this lead and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be another win for Team Newcastle.â&#x20AC;?

Prediction: Newcastle win

Mark Dobinson, Team Northumbria Student President â&#x20AC;&#x153;Newcastle have won it two consecutive years in a row and Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m hoping this year itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s third time lucky for Northumbria. With the opening of our new sports facility this summer, we are determined to have the trophy in pride of place for the opening ceremony. However I also think that this yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s competition is likely to go right down to the wire, with every single game being critical to the overall result. Our football teams are looking strong this year, and all are full of FRQĂ&#x20AC; GHQFH ZLWK VRPH LPSUHVVLYH SHUIRUPDQFHV since Christmas. Similarly our golfers have had brilliant seasons, so Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m hoping we pick up the points here too. Newcastle will obviously be very FRQĂ&#x20AC; GHQW LQ VRPH VSRUWV VR WKH VWDJH LV VHW IRU D great dayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s competition.â&#x20AC;?

Prediction: Northumbria win

David Coverdale - Editor â&#x20AC;&#x153;Having predicted a Northumbria win the last two years, it is tempting to continue this trend in the hope for the same result. However, you just cannot get away from the fact that Newcastle have been far the superior university in the last two Stan Calvert encounters and I see nothing to suggest a dramatic change of fortune this time around that will stop the Newcastle juggernaut.â&#x20AC;?

Prediction: Newcastle win

Paul Christian, Jamie Gavin and Tom James - Sports Editors After a strong start in the early events, and having watched Team Newcastleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s progress over the \HDU ZH¡UH TXLHWO\ FRQĂ&#x20AC; GHQW RI D UHFRUG WKLUG straight win. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sure to be as exciting as ever, and come Sunday evening we expect it to be much closer than in recent years. A shock result in any sport could turn the tide, but we have full belief that the University can pull through.

Prediction: Newcastle win

Fixtures Sport

Venue

Time

Athletics Badminton - M 1 Badminton - M 2 Badminton - W Basketball - M 1 Basketball - M 2 Basketball - W 1 Basketball - W 2 Fencing - M Fencing - W Football - M 1 Football - M 2 Football - M 3 Football - W 1 Football - W 2 Golf - 1 Golf - 2 Hockey - M 1 Hockey - M 2 Hockey - M 3 Hockey - W 1 Hockey - W 2 Hockey - W 3 Lacrosse - M Lacrosse - W Mountain Biking DH Mountain Biking XC Netball - 1 Netball - 2 Netball - 3 Netball - 4 Rugby League - 1 Rugby League - 2 Rugby Union - M 1 Rugby Union - M 2 Rugby Union - M 3 Rugby Union - M 4 Rugby Union - W Rowing - Beginner M Rowing - Beginner W Rowing - Senior M Rowing - Senior W Squash - M 2 Squash - W 1 Squash - W 2 Swimming - M Swimming - W Table Tennis - M 1 Table Tennis - M 2 Table Tennis - W Tennis - M Tennis - W 1 Tennis - W 2 Volleyball - M Volleyball - W

Gateshead Stadium Gateshead Stadium Gateshead Stadium Gateshead Stadium Gateshead Stadium NU Sports Centre Gateshead Stadium Coach Lane NU Sports Centre NU Sports Centre Coach Lane Cochrane Park Cochrane Park Bullocksteads Bullocksteads Matfen Hall GC Northumberland GC Coach Lane Coach Lane Coach Lane Longbenton Longbenton Longbenton Bullocksteads Bullocksteads Hamsterley Forest Hamsterley Forest Gateshead Stadium Gateshead Stadium Gateshead Stadium Gateshead Stadium Gateshead Stadium Gateshead Stadium Gateshead Stadium Cochrane Park Cochrane Park Bullocksteads Cochrane Park Newburn Boat House Newburn Boat House Newburn Boat House Newburn Boat House UNN City Campus NU Sports Centre NU Sports Centre City Pool City Pool NU Sports Centre UNN City Campus NU Sports Centre Northumberland Club David Lloyd David Lloyd Gateshead Stadium Gateshead Stadium

15.00 14.00 10.00 12.00 18.00 (Weds) 18.30 16.00 (Weds) 16.00 13.30 13.30 14.00 14.00 14.00 14.00 14.00 11.00 (Weds) 11.00 (Weds) 13.30 12.00 15.00 15.30 13.30 12.00 12.30 14.30 13.00 (Weds) 11.00 (Weds) 18.30 17.00 15.30 14.00 17.00 14.00 19.00 14.00 14.00 14.00 14.00 13.40 14.00 14.20 14.40 13.30 15.30 13.30 19.00 (Thurs) 19.00 (Thurs) 14.00 14.00 14.00 12.00 12.00 (Weds) 12.00 (Weds) 12.00 10.00

Results Sunday 21 February Sport

Score

American Football Cricket - M 1 Cricket - M 2 Cricket - M 3 Cricket - W Cross Country Skiing/Dual Slalom Squash

Newcastle 52-0 Northumbria (14/02) Awaiting result (21/02) Awaiting result (21/02) Awaiting result (21/02) Newcastle walkover win (21/02) Awaiting result (21/02) Newcastle win (03/02) Awaiting result (21/02)

Team Newcastle currently hold a 6-0 lead following victories in skiing, American football and a walkover in womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cricket. They may also now be further ahead after yesterdayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cricket, cross country and squash. Tennis, mountain biking, golf, swimming and basketball take place midweek before the majority of teams get set for Sundayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s action.

Kennedy gears up for hectic week ahead Colin Henrys 2010 represents the biggest Stan Calvert competition yet, and Performance Sport Manager Fraser Kennedy is the man charged with ensuring that the event runs smoothly.

So what exactly goes on behind the scenes? â&#x20AC;&#x153;I take Beta blockers to keep my heart-rate down,â&#x20AC;? Fraser laughs.

Indeed there is much to do to enable the competition to run â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;without any hiccupsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s even before Sunday 28 February. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It started yesterday (Sunday 21 February) for me with the cricket at South Gosforth, then across to cross FRXQWU\ DQG WKHQ WR WKH VTXDVK Ă&#x20AC; UVW WHDP WDNLQJ RQ 1RUWKXPEULD Ă&#x20AC; UVWV â&#x20AC;&#x153;Then itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be quite a frantic week making sure all the documents are clear; VIP zone; taking banners etc. down. ´7KHUH DUH VWLOO RQH RU WZR Ă&#x20AC; [WXUHV that need to be rearranged and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be pretty tight organising that. Then obviously Sunday will be full-on, from 10am all the way through, so itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a busy day.â&#x20AC;?

As he outlines his day, busy becomes more and more of an understatement. Among his many tasks DV KH Ă LWV EHWZHHQ YHQXHV LQ *DWHV head is ensuring that the running order for the day that he designed is implemented. ´:H PXVW Ă&#x20AC; W LQ DOO WKH VSULQWV work out when the rugby league starts, when theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re meant to come out to the music, when the cheerleaders are meant to come on, when the rugby league have got to leave WKH Ă&#x20AC; HOG ZKHQ WKH P VWDUWV DQG when the rugby union are meant to warm up â&#x20AC;&#x201C; weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got to make sure everything is co-ordinated and runs quite smoothly and appears professional. â&#x20AC;&#x153;But while thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s my main concern during the day Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll always have in the back of my head when the scores are coming in, how many points weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got, etc. So itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all great and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s all go.â&#x20AC;?

While he fails to budge from his position sitting on the fence and predict anything other than a draw, Fraser certainly seems to hold an exFLWHPHQW DQG TXLHW FRQĂ&#x20AC; GHQFH SULRU to the big day. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m going to be intrigued about the athletics this year because thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a new sport. Swimming for the last two years has been my highlight because itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s exceptionally well-run. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s great spirit, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s exciting, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s noisy, and in the last two years, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s really given me an extra buzz. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I think athletics is going to do that for me this year because, although Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got to make sure the timing goes right, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d love to think itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll all go smoothly and thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be good competition.â&#x20AC;?

Other sports that he backs to shine include golf, looking to display their promotion-contending credentials against Premier League opposition, and hockey. +H DOVR KROGV D TXLHW FRQĂ&#x20AC; GHQFH regarding the showpiece menâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s rugby union match. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Last season we lost the Kingston Park match, won the rematch at Cochrane Park just after the New Year and then we were hammered at Gateshead. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The league matches donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t count for anything. This is a one-off for a big cup and thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a lot at stake.â&#x20AC;?