144
VH:
MISSING TIME It's almost as though the couch has a thing on it which does that by itself, and I didn't see the person who does it. It's as though it's done remotely. You know, have you seen those things where you put your hands in when they handle radioactive material? Your hands go in and you handle instruments and then, at a remote location, something happens. It's like that. I don't think they have any direct contact with me, physically. It's as though wherever I am lying they're on that side of me behind the wall, or perhaps that's j ust where the sound comes from. It's as though I am talking to them over there in the next room. I guess it's because they tell me that, you know, I breathe my kind of air. I guess they breathe difďż˝ ferent air. I 'm not sure about that, but it's as though, well, whatever it is it's for my comfort. All this, it's j ust like you find it so natural. Matter of fact.
(Break is continuity where the tape was changed. VH discusses wanting to see them again , but bow can they find her?) VH:
AC: VH:
AC: VH:
It's an easy thing. It's almost as though he can identify me by . . . it's j ust like I stick out who I am, you know, like he can tell where I am. How can he tell who you are? Umm. like he can recognize a voice. It's like, he says, I can recognize your voice. It's sort of like recognizing brain waves, or something . . . it's like everybody has their own pattern, own trademark, so that he doesn 't have any problem about that. When I think of it, I didn't . . . (explain?). It seems that I j ust accepted that. He said, 'It's 1ike recognizing your voice.' Does the wound have any fun ction in their ability to 'recognize you'? I'm thinking (pause) . . . umm. They didn't talk about blood. They j ust said, 'Take a little, teeny piece of you home.' It's as though, the way they described it to me, it's like a combination of a souvenir . . . Yeah, I guess it does . . . a combination of a souvenir and a way of getďż˝ ting to know me better. And they asked my permission and they said it's very important and it won't hurt. And I say, 'Fine.' So I don 't watch. It's as though there's kind of .