progression in the relationship, and began treating this love between our birds with the sort of reverence that (certain people might say) ought to be saved for human love. My husband stopped forcing them into their costumes, because he didn’t want to embarrass them in front of each other. And I always hated those costumes, but I will come right out and say that I find the love idea a little on the goofy side, considering the difficulty that even very normal and competent humans sometimes have with it.
wanted us to spend two full weeks without talking to each other. Our love was buried by our language, he said, or something to that effect. Think of the countless marriages that end due to a lack of talking (My sisters wrote the book on it!), and here my husband had gotten this idea in his head. This was 1977. My husband’s beard covered most of his face (see enclosed photo), but look at those Paul McCartney eyes! Very expressive, I know, but a person simply cannot speak — cannot manage a relationship — with his eyes the same way he can with words. Call me a downer. I couldn’t keep a straight face with him moving his eyebrows at me, his eyes shining, him breathing like an animal.
Here is where you may or may not tear this letter up, depending on what kind of animal lover you are. In my experience, there are two types: Ones who say animals can do anything humans can do (like love), and ones who find it more I once timed respectful to treat animals as animals.
them at 17 solid minutes spent face to face on a piece of grapevine, bobbing their heads to an unheard and unbroken rhythm. What does that mean?
For the past few years, we haven’t had many people around, and it would have been difficult for my husband and me to notice any changes in bird behavior, as we were seeing them every day. But let me ask you this: Have you witnessed the head bobbing yet? If so, you are lucky, as they are extremely private about it. I could only catch glimpses of this ritual by setting up a mirror outside the sunroom, so I could watch their reflection from the kitchen without being seen (Pass that tip on to their new family, if you don’t mind.). I once timed them at 17 solid minutes spent face to face on a piece of grapevine, bobbing their heads to an unheard and unbroken rhythm. What does that mean? They don’t make a sound, they just bob and bob, in a trance, heads cocked to look each other in the eye. What reason does a bird have to look into another bird’s eye? Is it parasite related? I don’t doubt that there is a reason, but I’d like to hear an expert’s take on it, because it is very easy, especially with the number of children’s movies out there, to say “love” when we don’t really know.
I’m sure you’re aware of a belief, held by some in your field, that animals are somehow better than humans — deeper or more pure. In fact, I saw a bumper sticker in your shelter’s parking lot that says the only true love is a Labrador retriever’s love. And tha’s fine. It’s a very nice thought, but I don’t believe it’s helpful for people to take it too much to heart. And it can be very hard not to take something to heart when it’s such a prevalent idea.
What were we trying to accomplish? Why does love always have to be about “animal passions”? What’s wrong with talking? What else do we have, anyway? How’s a person supposed to love you if you won’t talk? What are we supposed to do, bob up and down looking at each other? Is that all it takes after all this time?
In short, I appreciate your taking the time to read this letter. Understand that my choice to surrender the Lovebirds has nothing to do with their personal qualities. For my own reasons, I could no longer keep them inside this house. Please see that Connor and Tilly are not split up. Science aside, they were made for each other. Sincerely, Barb Hammond M Nick Reller is a third-year student in Minnesota State University’s master’s program in creative writing. Reller’s story “The Alien” was published by Fifth Wednesday Journal in 2010.
Even my husband, the ever practical, can be susceptible to this sort of thinking. During our engagement (a million years ago), he
EQUAL HOUSING
OPPORTUNITY
OLD MAIN VILLAGE
MANKATO MAGAZINE • February 2013 • 33