Identity
A Gift Called Closure This Christmas I have a high affinity to men in uniform and weapons (don’t get any ideas) but I don’t date them. No big reason just the ‘uncertainties’ of their profession, its workings and their ever present three tenets summed up as 3W’s: Wine (they swallow lots of liquor); War (Most bar brawls are always caused by these fine men) and Women also read as we-men if you are on my side of the hedge (They have multiple ‘liaison’ partners). I’m also a dedicated enthusiast of those who abhor sports cars not because I know anything about them but just for the conventional reason they are not comfy when making out in them! Imagine my thrill when I was invited for this dinner event last Saturday evening! I think it was something to the effect that it was meant to empower youths and also support children’s home. The organizers of this thing were definitely refined in view of the venue and also the status of the guests I ran into at the function. I pause here and wonder. It’s either I date the wrong men, I’m still a lost cause when it comes to classy places or to the extreme I am cheap, Ouch! – Thanks guys, you are definitely princes among the men folk! ‘We need somebody who's got the heart, the empathy, to recognize what it's like to be a young teenage mom, the empathy to understand what it's like to be poor or African-American or gay or disabled or old and that's the criterion by which I'll be selecting my judges.’ Barack Obama
Enough with the diva moment! At some point during the occasion my mind wandered a bit and I started thinking about the men in my inane life! There’s the one I almost made out with in his (sports) car outside The Mall in Westlands on a first date; then there’s the one who literally showed up on my doorstep on a Tuesday morning to floss his new ride (sports). I recollect him telling me on my way to work that he intended to give it to his bf since he wanted something more exhilarating (Men are just so obvious!); there’s also the one from the April 2011 weekend I first met at the Ngong Race Course. He categorically told me he had issues with premature ejaculation when it came to women. Of course premature ejaculation isn't a laughing matter for anyone, except for your friends when you tell them about it on the phone the next morning, I think my first and last friendship with benefits ended because the main event was invariably over before he got his socks off; then David* this half-caste guy I’ve always had a crush on (still do) because he plays golf proficiently and promised me pro bono lessons! I remember I literally showed up for the first time at a Mosque in my over 20 years just to meet him -Gay men! God Bless them!; I can’t forget
about this very wedded middle aged corporate executive who once dropped me home at very ‘ungodly’ hours of a Sunday morning and then how do u expect me to leave Soldier boy, he is a well bred, awesomely built serviceman with an unsullied English accent that proves he never went to a school named after any human being and works with our disciplined forces. Despite his raunchy personality (which I find appealing) he always calls me beautiful and as much as he hasn’t been the relationship type, he’s really a piece of work. I mean, how do you think I learnt how to play the roulette in a casino or better still discern the sinful existence of most high end Nairobi watering holes! Once, late at night, when he was a bit tipsy, he confided to me that life rushed at him out of a fog, constantly taking him by surprise. That explained to me the multiple sex partners but he assured me that I wasn’t in his catalogue of the pretty boys he deflowers. Oh and when he gets to town for a weekend! I have always shoved all my prior engagements aside ready to hear the ‘men in uniform and artillery’ stories, receive gifts in kind that are usually advanced to me when he’s from mission and also get introduced to his latest conquests. He’s actually the authority behind: Save a boyfriend for a rainy day. And another, in case it doesn't rain....friends, the list is interminable! Page 24