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Respect Magazine ● August 2016
e m o c l e w Editors’ welcome
Welcome to Respect, the magazine for the UK's most LGBT-friendly retailer, the Co-op.
Ben
On 12 June 2016, Omar Mateen a 29-year-old American security guard, walked into a gay club in Orlando and killed or wounded 99 people. The after-effects of the shooting, the worst in US history, are still being felt to this day. Hundreds of people are left grieving for loved ones who went on a night out but never came back, while millions more across the globe are still trying to understand how and why tragedies like this can still happen. Some people struggle to understand why LGBT people in the UK felt so heartbroken by something that was going on thousands of miles away. We grieved for Orlando because every LGBT person knows what it’s like to be discriminated against, or to fear discrimination. Every day we make decisions based on what is safe, rather than what is right – can I hold my partner’s hand walking down the street? Am I OK to be out about my sexuality or gender identity at work? Can I wear this outfit to that bar? Thousands of vigils took place across the world in the days after the attack and the GoFundMe page has now raised over $7m for the victims’ families and the survivors. The display of solidarity, strength and hope that the global community showed in the wake of the atrocity gave us hope that one day we will reach true equality.
Co p y r i g h t ©2 0 1 6T h eCo o p e r a t i v eGr o u pL t d , a l l r i g h t sr e s e r v e d . Un l e s so t h e r wi s es t a t e d , a l l c o n t e n t i nt h i sp u b l i c a t i o ni sp r o p e r t yo f T h eCo o p e r a t i v eGr o u pL t d . Un a u t h o r i s e dd u p l i c a t i o n , c o p y i n ga n d r e d i s t r i b u t i o n( e i t h e r i nf u l l o r i np a r t ) i ss t r i c t l yp r o h i b i t e d .
contents
Amelia
A word from This edition's editors, Amelia Cargo and Ben Brosnan
................................
note
Where faith, sexuality and ethnicity meet Respect meets... Asifa Lahore Respect Newsdesk
On Orlando It was an attack on us all, but gay blood was spilt
#digitalpride review Back in April we held took part in the UK’s first digital pride festival, examining loneliness and social isolation from an LGBT perspective
#beingcoop What LGBT colleagues think about our new ways of Being Co-op
e: RespectLGBT@co-operative.coop ● t @CoopRespectLGBT
and more...
news
. . . k s e d
The study, which was conducted by The Williams Institute at the UCLA School of Law, estimates that around 1.4 million American adults identify as transgender. The findings also suggested that young adults are more likely to identify as trans than older people.
El l e’ sSe pt ember i s s uehast hr eeLGBT s t ar sont hec ov er Actors Amandla Stenberg and Kristen Stewart will feature on two of the covers, while transgender model Hari Nef takes the third.
JL or e c o r d s s o n gi na i d o f Or l a n d ov i c t i ms
All proceeds from 'Love Make the World Go
desk. ..
St u d yr e v e a l sn e a r l y1 . 5 mi l l i o nn o wi d e n t i f ya st r a n s
…..........................................................................................................................
breakingn e ws
news
Respect Magazine ● August 2016
Round' will be donated to the Hispanic
Federation for the Somos Orlando Fund.
…............................................
Stonewall launches campaign encouraging LGBT people to stand together #ByYourSide is aimed at highlighting how the LGBT community can stand together – as
allies, communities and organisations – to
ensure all LGBT people can be accepted without exception. A statement from
Stonewall explains that the campaign is
about “bringing people into our movement and showing people that we can all do something to make a difference.” A video launched to promote the
campaign shows a host of LGBT people
honouring the people who have stood by their sides during their toughest times –
from parents to partners and best friends to colleagues.
e: RespectLGBT@co-operative.coop ● t @CoopRespectLGBT
e w e r a d u o r p How
really? I’ve always been of the opinion that one day we shouldn’t need Pride. That people are just people, no matter who they are. I thought we should strive for a world where our differences no longer need to be pointed out or celebrated, but are just part of us – like having brown eyes or freckles. Optimistic, I know – or near impossible when you actually think about it – but you get the idea. I came to this conclusion when I realised how much people have forgotten about the real meaning of Pride,
Respect Magazine ● August 2016
Ben
we are? Is prejudice from within our community just as much of a problem as that from the wider population?
Worrying statistics Although we have reached a place where we are mostly equal in the eyes of the law, the need for us to stand together and support each other is just as strong as ever. You just need to look at the stats to see that – over half of LGBT youth have self-harmed and 4 in 10 have considered suicide. Gay is also still used as a slur in schools across the country, with 90% of teachers saying that young people experience homophobic bullying, regardless of their sexual orientation.
its humble beginnings and the bravery LGBT people showed when they marched the streets shouting loud and proud about who we are. Pride today can sometimes seem like an excuse for a party, rather than a chance to stand up and be counted.
A rude awakening But then, while writing this article, Orlando happened. This senseless loss of life and act of discriminate violence shook the world. It made me see that I had been lulled into a bit of a false sense of security, that my utopian world of mass acceptance was even further away than I thought.
United we stand Orlando saw LGBT people and allies across the world
As someone who has suffered with depression in the
coming together in solidarity with the victims, survivors
past, I’d like to see a more united and open LGBT
and their families. Seeing Sadiq Khan, London’s newly
community. And perhaps Pride is a good place to start.
elected Muslim mayor, standing side by side with LGBT
It’s the only time of the year where streets are closed
people at the Soho vigil really helped to hammer home
off to let LGBT people from all walks of life celebrate
the message that we can only beat hatred if we stand
who they are without fear or shame. The focus is on us
united. That was a really important lesson to learn.
and that doesn’t happen very often. Pride can be a protest and a celebration – it’s our stage, our
But it did get me thinking, Carrie Bradshaw style, about
dancefloor and our soapbox. And we need to make
LGBT people today. Are we truly as united as we think
sure it stays that way.
e: RespectLGBT@co-operative.coop ● t @CoopRespectLGBT
P h o t o sc o p y r i g h t ©C h r i s t i n eE mi l yHa y t e r
Respect Magazine ● August 2016
Respect meets … Asifa Lahore experiences of going out on the scene in London and it was weird because I found that I had to defend my Muslim identity all the time. People asked how I could follow a religion that basically denounced who I was and those questions were really hard to deal with. It almost felt like I was being asked to choose between these two really important parts of myself and I just knew I couldn't do that.
When did you realise you were gay? I realised I was gay at a fairly young age. I remember being at my auntie's house in Pakistan when I was about five or six and I enjoyed being around boys more than I did being around girls. When I was a little bit older I shied away from hanging out with boys from my community due to the stigma attached to it. You grew up in London, but your parents are from Pakistan. What was it like to straddle those two worlds as a young, queer person? It was difficult. My home environment is traditional and very conservative. My parents and Islam were, and still are, huge influences in my life so I kept quiet about being gay as I didn’t want to rock the boat. But between the ages of 16 and 19 I went to the Brit School, which gave me the time and space to explore my sexuality. I met other LGBT people and although I didn't meet any other LGBT Muslims, it allowed me to understand who I was a bit better. You've talked a lot about Islam's attitudes towards LGBT people, but how have non-religious LGBT people reacted to your faith? While I was at the Brit School, I had my first
What happened after you left the Brit School? I decided not to follow a career in the performing arts as it would have meant being completely open about who I was and I wasn't ready to do that, so I went to Queen Mary University of London where I met my now husband. It was being in a relationship with him that gave me the courage to tell my Mum and Dad. How did they react? I actually told my Mum first. She found a scene magazine in my bedroom and asked me about it. I knew that I could either lie my way out of the situation, or I could be honest, so I was honest. I told her in Urdu, the language we speak at home, and we both started crying. Then my Dad came into the room and we all just sat together crying. Weeks and weeks of questioning followed, which sounds harrowing, but at that point they'd had no exposure to LGBT culture at all so it was coming from a place of innocence. Then they took me to see the Imam at our mosque, who told me that I could be celibate or get married to a woman, so that was really hard. These were people that I trusted and to have them not accept me was truly heart-breaking. At that age I wasn't able to deal with it, so I agreed to get married to my cousin in Pakistan. Everyone around me was so happy, but I was completely miserable.
e: RespectLGBT@co-operative.coop ● t @CoopRespectLGBT
how I was going to be represented, but Channel 4 gave me loads of support which really helped me to feel at ease. I'm so glad I did it because these are issues that aren't discussed in either the LGBT, Muslim or Asian communities, so to be able to bring them to such a wide audience is amazing. What you saw is what you got, it was a really organic and quick process.
What was the turning point? I told one of my tutors at uni and they put me in touch with Imaan, the LGBT Muslim support group, and Naz, a charity which runs support groups for Asian gay men. Meeting other men like me made me realise that I wasn't alone. I met Muslim men who were out and happy and it made me see that my life could be different. Those support groups, along with counselling, gave me the confidence to tell my parents that I wasn't going to go through with the marriage. I think entering into a civil partnership with my husband was a turning point for them because it showed them that even though I was gay, I still wanted a stable, committed relationship. Marriage as a concept is something everyone can relate to as well, regardless of sexuality, so I think that helped too. It was a really beautiful day and since then my parents have formed a great relationship with my husband. It's taken over nine years to get to this point, but with honesty and good communication on both sides, we've got through it.
How have you reconciled the two parts of your identity? All I've ever wanted was to be in a monogamous, happy marriage, which for me is completely compatible with my religion. Others may not agree and that's fine. I believe that in the next life we'll be judged on whether we've been a good person or not, on our humanity, and I am leading the best life I can. How did you get into doing drag? It happened by chance, really. I was out one evening and saw an advert for a competition called Drag Idol. I entered and got the bronze award, which was amazing. It was the organisers of that competition who gave me the title of ‘Britain’s first out Muslim drag queen.’ Drag is a lot of things, but for me it’s a way for me to explore what it means to be at the intersection of faith, sexuality and ethnicity. I started using social media to get my performances out there, which eventually led to the Channel 4 programme.
Tell us more about working on the documentary with Channel 4? At the beginning I obviously had concerns about
There's a scene in the documentary where your Mum comes to see you pick up an award, can you tell us more about that? That was such an emotional moment, and it was exactly how you saw it. The weird thing is that she was also living a bit of a double life - saying one thing to me and another to the community - and like me, she decided that had got to stop. My Mum is my hero and having her at the awards ceremony was one of the best moments of my life. What was it like to have Ian McKellen’s involvement? He’s been such a pioneer for LGBT rights in this country, so I was really moved that he decided to do the programme. When I met him he said that he was in awe of me and what I was doing for the community, so to hear that from him was absolutely fantastic. What advice would you give to other young people in a similar situation as you? Everyone’s family is different and what worked for me won’t necessarily work for everyone. I would say that you should expect the best, but prepare for the worst – make sure that you’re financially stable and able to support yourself if need be. It’s also really important to have a good support network so that you have people to lean on if things get difficult. I would also say it’s important to be honest with yourself about what you want. Don’t put other people’s priorities for you before your own. If you do, you’re really doing a disservice to yourself, your family and your community. What’s life been like after the show and what’s next for you? I was so worried about the reaction, but the outpouring of love from the British public has been amazing. I think it’s really opened people’s eyes to the fact that people’s identities are multifaceted – people use so many labels to describe themselves, and sometimes they use no labels at all, and that’s all OK. The show has opened so many doors for me. Earlier this year I starred in Channel 4’s True Colours TV ad, which celebrates diversity in all its forms. That was important for me as it showed who I am as a performer, as well as who I am as an activist. Currently I’m working on growing my gay Asian club night, Disco Rani. I’m also working on some things that I can’t talk about at the minute, so watch this space.
e: RespectLGBT@co-operative.coop ● t @CoopRespectLGBT
#be i ngc oop
Respect Magazine ● August 2016
At our AGM we revealed that we were going back to being Co-op in front of an audience of around 1,000 members. The change is more than just a new logo; it represents the fact that we’re going back to our roots and putting members back at the heart of our business. Part of this is a set of key values that describe how we, as colleagues, can embody what being Co-op means. Although these have been developed with all colleagues in mind, our Diversity team fed into the work, and they have been designed to create an environment where everyone, including LGBT people, can flourish as the business grows.
Our ways of Being Co-op Bey o u r s e l f , a l wa y s Sh o wy o uc a r e
Dowh a t ma t t e r smo s t Su c c e e dt o g e t h e r
We hear lots of stories from LGBT colleagues about how they feel about working for the Co-op, many of which are really good examples of what Being Co-op means in real life. Here are just a few
Being able to be myself at work makes me better at my job and more able to focus on what’s right for the business.
Having worked at the Coop for the last two years I’ve felt comfortable and supported in being myself Calvin via Twitter
Simon via email
feel no I woman, I s n a tr a me at all. As s rd a w to ation am discrimin self and I y m e b to feel free in an allrk o w to d very prou ectful and resp e iv s lu c in ank you to le. th ig B t. n e possib environm akes this m o h w e book everyon ague Face Colle Diane via
e: RespectLGBT@co-operative.coop ● t @CoopRespectLGBT
Usdaw reaching out
Respect Magazine ● August 2016
to LGBT workers
Over the last ten years Usdaw has made fantastic strides forward in reaching out to and involving LGBT members. Before 2006, the Union did not have a mechanism for getting LGBT members involved and we were not always sure what issues our LGBT members were facing at work. That is why the Union set up, in every division, a Divisional Equality Forum. The forums have reserved seats for LGBT members (as well as seats for women, BME and disabled members). Their role is to find practical ways to encourage LGBT members to get involved in the Union. The forums have transformed the Union’s approach to LGBT issues. There is now a wide range of activity going on in the Union for LGBT members
Below are just some of the things that have
ensuring that LGBT members are visible and
been achieved so far.
involved, not just in Usdaw’s equality structures, but right throughout the Union.
●
A full delegation, including a LGBT activist from every one of the Union’s seven geographical regions, attends TUC LGBT Conference every year.
●
The Union has lay activists representing Usdaw on both the TUC and STUC LGBT Committees.
●
The Union organises a national LGBT get together every year in June with the aim of encouraging newer members to get active and involved in the Union. The event takes place in the summer in Manchester and brings together members from all over the country.
●
Usdaw activists organise stalls and take part in Pride events up and down the UK.
●
The Union has produced a wide range of LGBTspecific literature and giveaways.
●
There are annual regional get-togethers for LGBT members and for reps supporting LGBT members at work in almost every one of the Union’s seven divisions.
To find out more about Usdaw's work supporting LGBT members and how to get involved contact Ruth Cross, Jo Bird or Tom Foster at Usdaw's head office in Manchester. Call 0161 224 2804 or email equalitymatters@usdaw.org.uk.
e: RespectLGBT@co-operative.coop ● t @CoopRespectLGBT
Respect Magazine ● August 2016
community
focus
As a business that champions a better way of doing business for customers, members and communities across the country, we wanted to take a look at some of the amazing LGBT community groups in the UK. This time we’re starting with the Village Angels in Manchester. If you have been out and about in Manchester’s Gay Village any time in the last four years, you may have noticed teams of people clad in hot pink patrolling the streets. These visions in pink are LGBT Foundation’s Village Angels. 25 volunteers in total, some of whom have volunteered with us since the programme’s
Angels by name, angels by nature
inception in 2012.
The Village Angels are a
Our volunteers come from an incredibly diverse
team of volunteers who
range of backgrounds and all have different
are out every weekend
reasons for volunteering.
supporting vulnerable people. On an average
We want more people to get involved and give
night, the Angels may
some of their time to support Manchester’s
find themselves
LGBT community. All Village Angels are
providing sexual health
provided with ongoing skills training, to ensure
advice, mental health support or assisting people to report crimes. The
that their volunteer experience is as rewarding
most common type of support offered by the
are also provided.
as possible. Transportation and a meal on shift
Angels, however, is helping those who have over indulged a little too much to get home safely.
We’re recruiting We couldn’t do what we do without our fantastic
If you are interested in becoming a Village Angel, please get in touch by emailing angels@lgbt.foundation or calling 0345 3 30 30 30
team of dedicated volunteers. At present we have
e: RespectLGBT@co-operative.coop ● t @CoopRespectLGBT
v v a a v l l i i a d d l i i u d u m i m um Respect Magazine ● August 2016
about
Ne e di n f o r ma t i o n , s u p p o r t o rj u s ts o me o n et ot a l kt o ?
The Co-op Employee Assistance Programme (EAP) is here to support all Co-op colleagues, whenever you need it. It’s a totally confidential and independent service provided by the market leading Validium Group - all paid for by the Co-op, so there’s no charge to you. Practical information, guidance and counselling is available 24/7 to help you with a wide range of personal and work-related issues. Here are just some examples: l You
are the victim of homophobic,
biphobic or transphobic bullying at work, or know someone who is l You
want advice on coming out to
validium
®
family, friends or colleagues l You
are at risk of redundancy
l Someone
in your family is ill and you
INCREASING WORKFORCE VALUE
want to know how best to support them l You
are not happy with your GP and
want to know how to complain
By phone Talk in confidence with a professional counsellor or specialist, available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year: From a UK landline: From a mobile:
0800 970 1030 0330 332 9996
Online For online information and guidance, join vClub at https://www.validium.com/login. Use the following details to access the site and then create your own personal account. Username: Coop Password: Group1844
e: RespectLGBT@co-operative.coop ● t @CoopRespectLGBT
Respect Magazine â—? August 2016
e d i Pr
Myf i r s t
Last year we ran a competition that gave 10 lucky colleagues the chance to attend Manchester Pride. Calvin Smith, who works in one of our stores near Statford-upon-Avon, was one of the winners. Here, he shares his experience of going to Pride for the first time. Last year I had the privilege of walking in the Manchester Pride parade. It was my first visit to the city and my first time at Pride Next to the birth of my niece and nephew, walking in the parade in my Co-op t-shirt (which I still have) was the proudest moment of my life. Usually I suffer from anxiety, but everyone made me feel very welcome. After the parade, and a muchneeded coffee, me and my friends decided to go to Canal Street and explore the festival. I've always wanted to go to Canal Street, so it was very exciting. We ended up in the VIP
area, listening to live music and chatting to our fellow party-goers. Celebrating my first pride that weekend was fantastic. Being surrounded by so many other LGBT people was amazing. I I felt that I was part of the community, something that I'd never really felt before. Having spent the weekend celebrating Pride, I felt a lot more comfortable in myself. Don't get me wrong, I've never been ashamed of who I am and never will be, but being with people who were all accepting of each other made me feel at home in a way I never had before.
Respect Magazine ● August 2016
#di gi t al pr i de
review
In April we took part in #digitalpride, the UK’s first ever online Pride festival. Digital and loneliness are both huge themes for us at the minute and the event was a chance for us to discuss loneliness in a digital world, from an LGBT perspective. We kicked off the campaign with a Thunderclap, which gave us a chance to spread news of #digitalpride to over 380,000 people online.
We also hosted an event in Manchester, 1 Angel Square where we heard from our guest speakers; Amy Collins, who told us about coming out as a trans woman and Vicky Beeching, who spoke about how being gay in the bible belt affected her health. Along with the seventy five guests attending, we welcomed thousands to the event with our Facebook Live broadcast. If you missed it, you can watch the videos of the live stream over on the Co-op blog.
e: RespectLGBT@co-operative.coop ● t @CoopRespectLGBT
Respect Magazine ● August 2016
s ' r e t s e h c n a MGreat Village Bake Off
Ret ur ns
The Village Bakers, a Manchester-based LGBT social group, are holding their fourth annual Great Village Bake Off. And you're invited. One of the highlights of Superbia 2016, the Great Village Bake Off is going to be a fabulous afternoon full of cake, pastries and savoury treats. No soggy bottoms allowed. Hosted by non other than Manchester’s own Misty Chance, the format has slightly changed this year. You can either enter the Beginner's Cupcake category or Fairytale Creation. Bake it at home and bring it along to The Molly House for 1pm on Sunday 21st August.
The only limit is that it must fit through the door! Entry is free but we do ask that you make a donation to Manchester Pride when you enter via the link below. Prizes will be awarded for the Best Cupcake and Best Fairytale Creation. Fairytale creations can be sweet or savoury, the only rule is they should have some fairytale connection. With bonus points being awarded for campness and originality, the prizes Star Baker accolade are yours for the taking.
To enter The Great Village Bake Off, head online to www.villagebakeoff2016.eventbrite.co.uk for all the details.
e: RespectLGBT@co-operative.coop ● t @CoopRespectLGBT
It was an attack on all of us, but gay blood was spilt
Respect Magazine ● August 2016
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e: RespectLGBT@co-operative.coop ● t @CoopRespectLGBT
Respect Magazine ● August 2016
Summer of
Pride Despite what the weather may be telling you, Summer is most definitely here and lots of people will be gearing up to go to LGBT Pride celebrations up and down the country. Taking part in Pride is just one of the ways the Co-op shows its commitment to diversity in our communities. We’ve supported over 100 since 2010, flying the rainbow flag in Glasgow, Brighton and Bristol, to name but a few places.
This year we’ll be supporting four prides – Blackpool, Manchester, London and Brighton – by dressing up local food stores, marching in the parade or both! Our theme for this year is ‘We are proud’, because we are proud, both of our colleagues and of our new Co-op.
Tell us why you’ve got Pride! We got involved with Blackpool because a colleague told us he was organising the parade entry in that area. If you want to organise something for Pride next year, email us and let us know. If you can’t come along in person, we’re asking colleagues to tell us what Pride means to them by using #prideincoop
e: RespectLGBT@co-operative.coop ● t @CoopRespectLGBT
Respect Magazine ● August 2016
V Revolution:
a lunchtime review 88 Oldham Street, Manchester, M4 1LF
If you fancy a burger, hold the meat then V Revolution is the place to go. Since recently deciding to ditch the animal products and consequently discovering the wonderful world of Manchester's meat-free restaurants, V Revolution has been high on my list to visit.
are Fry’s burgers, Tofurky and Violife cheese. All products can also be bought in store, great if you want more range than your local supermarket. However the restaurant is due to move to larger premises on Edge St in the Northern Quarter which will allow fries to also be served, complete with an in-store bakery and bar.
As you first walk in, you realise it has the same homely atmosphere of a regular ‘burger joint’. With the diner style layout and worn leather sofas, this is a different set up than the sophisticated surrounds of other vegetarian restaurants such as 1847. However, if you are hankering for a relaxed atmosphere, friendly staff and a guilt-free burger and shake, this is the place for you.
If you don’t fancy lunch, you can also buy a hot drink and vegan cake. For thorough researching purposes, we purchased both a chocolate orange and a cashew nut gluten free brownie. These both had the distinct taste of coconut, which I love but if you are not a fan I’d suggest the pear sponge cake instead.
All options on the menu have creative names - We tried the Barbecuban Missile Crisis and Chipotle 'n' Dale. Both were lipsmackingly good, with special compliments to the coleslaw. The main brands used by V Revolution
Paula
So whether you are trying meatless Mondays or are a fully-fledged vegan, V Revolution is a good place to spend a relaxed lunchtime or afternoon coffee date. However, do be aware that it is closed on a Tuesday.
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