Connection March 2024

CC

Self-Directed Violence and Other Forms of Self-Injury

Self-directed violence and other forms of self-injury are serious problems that affect children, youth, and families. However, there are things that families and health professionals can do to help prevent these behaviors.

Self-Directed Violence

The Centers for Disease Control (CDC) defines self-directed violence as anything a person does intentionally that can cause injury to self, including death, For example:

• Cutting

• Suicide

Self-harm tends to begin in teen or early adult years. Some people may engage in self-harm a few times and then stop. Others do it more often and have trouble stopping.

For many people, self-harm gives them a sense of relief and is used as a means to cope with a problem. Some teens say that when they hurt themselves, they are trying to stop feeling lonely, angry, or hopeless.

CDC notes that these factors increase the risk of youth suicide:

• History of previous suicide attempts

• Family history of suicide

• History of depression or other mental illness

• Alcohol or drug abuse

• Stressful life event or loss

• Easy access to lethal methods

• Exposure to the suicidal behavior of others

Other forms of Self-Injury

Other forms of self-injury can also cause harm to self, including death. These behaviors may be unintentional in nature. They are often repetitive and occur in response to something in the environment1. Other forms of self-injury include

• Head banging

• Self-biting

• Self-scratching

There may be multiple and unique causes of self-injury for each child. For one child the cause might be poor communication skills. For another child the cause might be a medical condition. It is important to try to understand the cause(s) of the behavior so that treatment will be more effective.

Children and Youth with Disabilities

Children and youth with developmental disabilities, such as autism and intellectual disability, are more likely to engage in other forms of self-injury than children without these

disabilities. Youth with depression, anxiety disorder, and conduct disorder have a higher chance of self-violence, including suicide, than children without these disorders.

It is important to understand the reasons for self-directed violence and other forms of self-injury among children with disabilities in order to find the best treatment. It is also important to coordinate care given by family, school, and healthcare providers.

What Can We Do for Children and Youth?

Contact your health professional if your child attempts self-directed violence or engages in other forms of self-injury. One way to prevent these behaviors is to understand what causes the child to do the behavior. These causes will be different for each person, so finding the cause and best treatment will be different for each child.

Healthcare Professionals

As a healthcare professional, you have an important role in preventing self-directed violence and other forms of self-injury. Health professionals can help prevent these behaviors by

• Asking about known factors that increase the chance that these behaviors will occur by talking to patients;

• Learning about different assessment tools for depression and suicide risk;

• Considering a variety of causes (for example, emotional, environmental, and medical);

• Recommending interventions to address the needs of

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The Season of Transformations

The way I see it, March presents us with a multitude of changes going from winter into spring. We never seem to know what is going to hit us from day to day with our March weather! But we also were introduced to the changes in February with the sudden five inches of snow, then a few days later we had nice warm days. Definitely a time to be watching the forecast!

During the past five to six months I have found that if you cannot count on anything else, you can count on change. With the change of the seasons you will see plants, grass, leaves on the trees die but eventually spring forth new beautiful growth in vibrant colors that gives us hope and helps turn our winter blah depressive days to a outlook of happiness and motivation.

Spring just seems to make everything fresh. Those that have a green thumb, or wish they do, are planting and freshening their flower gardens. They are preparing their gardens for the new vegetables and herbs. Spring just appeals to all senses of the body, smell, hearing, touch and seeing.

I use to love to lay in bed and listen to the different bugs making noises or listen to the birds singing early in the morning.

To me, March is a beginning of fun and exciting things to come. March is also a month where I have experienced big snows and the beginnings of the storms that produce

destructive tornadoes. We live in Missouri where we can experience it all in one day, but, it is the open window of things to come. We plan. We dream. We prepare. The sun begins to shine for longer periods of time, which uplifts our spirits. At this point of the year we anticipate when the temperatures will stay in the 60s for more than two days and usually when it gets into the mid 70s, the planning has become real. Spring has arrived and the seeds can be planted.

We are so fortunate to live in this part of the country that offers so much in beautiful scenery—the hills of the Ozarks, the lakes, the hiking trails, beautiful camping spots and so much more. I feel like March gets us ready for those times that we spend outdoors. We get the itch to get out of the house from the many days that we have spent closed off to the frigid temperatures and start planning the trips, vacations, planting, taking walks, etc. Just the thought of this time of year is so refreshing that I feel it is a time of rebirth, even if it is only in the planning stages.

If we get more cold weather at least we are at the point where we can see around the corner where we can look forward to more time outside and exciting adventures!

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FEATURES

8 |

HEARTLAND HORSESHOEING

Chris Gregory of Lamar set the standard for a generation of farriers around the world

19 |

23 |

BUCHHOLZ SISTERS

Pageants bring out community action in Jasmine and Scarlet Buchholz of Aurora

LOCAL AUTHOR SPOTLIGHT

Marlon Hayes authors 11:59, a novel full of mystery and romance that keeps the pages turning to the last second

28 |

MAKING ART BLOOM

Monett High School students aspire and create works of art, earning accolades

35 | KURIMA

REAL ESTATE

The new mogul on the block

embarks on multiple succesful ventures

HE WROTE THE BOOK HE WROTE THE BOOK

Shoeing Horses is a Career, a Science and an Art Form

–Chris Gregory

Afarrier is defined as a craftsman who trims and shoes horses, and many in southwest Missouri may be surprised to learn that one of their neighbors literally wrote the book on the often forgotten – yet very crucial – craft.

Chris Gregory owned Heartland Horseshoeing School in Lamar, and over the past 15 years has earned incredible accolades in a small industry that provides necessary service for equine owners across the globe.

Gregory grew up on a ranch in New Mexico and ultimately attended military school on a rodeo scholarship, graduating as team captain.

His love of rodeo led to a career in shoeing horses.

“I started getting paid to shoe horses

in college,” he said. “Shoeing horses is a career, rodeo is not, so horseshoeing replaced rodeo for me.”

That career has led him to six of seven continents, and he says that as soon as a horse or mule needs shod in Antarctica, he’ll be eager to round out his resumé and be the first person to shoe a horse on all seven continents.

Early in his career as a farrier, Chris said he wanted to make good use of his vocational education degree, and penned 22 letters via typewriter to various colleges offering his services as a horseshoeing instructor. “I basically said ‘if you need a horseshoeing program, I’m your guy,’’’ he said. Ultimately, he was welcomed to a gunsmithing school in 1992, where he began teaching his curriculum.

Story by Mike Gervais

Chris Gregory has made a name for himself as the premier educator in the horseshoeing world thanks to his successful school, which attracts students from across the globe, and his textbook, which is taught in a number of different schools.

In 1995 he opened Heartland Horseshoeing school and began teaching 10 days after the birth of his son Cody. Today, Cody, Chris’s wife Kelly and their daughter Jacquelyn are all involved in horseshoeing in some capacity, along with Cody and Jacquelyn’s respective spouses.

The goal of the school is the same as any other educational endeavor: to provide the very best instruction to students learning the trade.

And in such a small industry, the Gregory family, Heartland Horseshoeing and Chris specifically, have made a tangible impact.

In 2009, while recovering from surgery, Chris said he decided to utilize his downtime away from the forge and horses to create a much-needed, up-todate textbook on the often overlooked craft of horseshoeing.

“Once you start writing a book, it

takes on a life of its own,” Chris said. “Every morning for 16 months, I got up at 2 a.m. and started writing. And when you write, one thing leads to another and you keep coming up with things you need to include.”

The end product, “Gregory’s Textbook of Farriery,” is currently available in print in English and Spanish, and via audiobook.

That textbook is not only used at Heartland, but has also been adopted by 15 to 20 different schools world-wide.

He said that in and of itself is a feat, as many schools prefer to utilize their own curriculum, so when other schools began teaching his curriculum, it was an affirmation that he is one of the foremost authorities in the world.

And that’s not the only indicator.

Chris has been an American Farrier’s Association Certified Journeyman Farrier since 1991. The AFA has recognized

Chris with its Jim Linzy Outstanding Clinician Award twice, and Outstanding Farrier Educator Award three times.

As a farrier competitor, he has been a member of the American Farrier’s Team, which represents the U.S. at the Internationals in Stoneleigh. He has competed at the World Championships Blacksmith Competition in Calgary 18 times and been in the Top Ten at that contest. He has also judged the contest at the Calgary Stampede. Through the World Champion Blacksmiths Association, Chris has finished in the Top Ten every year that he competed with them. Chris started competing in 1988, and has been in contests all over the world.

He earned the title of Fellow of the Worshipful Company of Farriers (FWCF) at the age of 30. The Worshipful Company of Farriers, (WCF) is a group founded in London in 1356 and

regarded by many as stewards of horseshoeing’s highest standards. Around 40 farriers currently hold this distinction, five of those Americans. In 2010, the Company named Chris an examiner, becoming the first American to work as an examiner for a WCF exam. He served for five years until deciding to dedicate more time and attention to the FITS Exam and the Therapeutic Endorsement designation, where he is an examiner for the higher level of the AFA exams.

Chris has appeared at farrier and equine foot care events across the United States and around the globe. He has presented numerous times at the American Farrier’s Association Annual Convention and the International Hoof-Care Summit. The FITS exam was originally written by Chris for the Association of Brazilian Farriers, but was later adopted in South Africa, Australia, New Zealand, Argentina, Mexico and has been administered in the U.S. as well.

In 2008 at the age of 39, Chris was inducted into the International Horseshoeing Hall Of Fame, joining nearly 120 accomplished members. Last year, he was inducted in the South African Horseshoeing Hall of Fame.

Chris’s writings have appeared in American Farriers Journal, Anvil Magazine, Rural Heritage, Loose Shoe and Western Horseman, to name a few.

Despite that lengthy list of accomplishments, one might argue that the biggest impact Gregory has had on the industry is the impact he has had on his students over his more than 30 years of education.

Since opening in 1995, Heartland has seen more than 1,000 students graduate with world class knowledge about equine foot care.

“If someone is coming to our school, they’re looking to make a career of it,” Chris said. “It’s unbelievable the

Cody Gregory, the son of Chris Gregory, has made a successful career of horseshoeing in the southwest Missouri region.

“Where we work hard, so you can get the most out of your hard work.”

amount of money you can make horseshoeing. The demand is through the roof. It’s an incredible trade. I have a very tiny business shoeing that my wife and I manage, my son and his wife have a very large shoeing practice, and my daughter and her husband have a successful shoeing business.”

He said shoeing horses is a skill that requires constant growth and education, a little bit of talent and a lot of knowledge.

“It’s a science, but there’s also an artistic aspect to it. There are 300 styles of shoes, and what you do is going to be specific to what the horse is doing,” Chris said.

He explained that a working horse may need one specific type of shoe, while a trail horse ridden for recreation may need something a little different, and a rodeo horse will need another style.

And Heartland has the knowledge, resources and yes, the textbook, to teach it all.

“Its been a great career, theres no denying that,” Gregory said. “I’ve been hired to do clinics across the globe, I’ve shod horses on six continents and we’ve had students from all over the world.”

In addition to shorter clinics, Heartland’s main program, a 24-week course, is designed to accommodate anyone from hobby blacksmiths to those who have never seen a horseshoe before.

And with people coming from all over the world to learn from Chris and his family, space at the school is limited.

“Most of the time, we’re booked for class six months out, and we take anywhere from13 to 67 students at a time,” Chris said.

The school also has a strong digital presence, with a Youtube channel that has generated hundreds of thousands of views and subscribers.

To learn more about Heartland, visit www.heartlandhorseshoeing.com or find them on Youtube. n

Friday

Thursday

Thursday

Thursday

Nothing

*

Darren

Randy

by Jessica M. Gilkey, RD, LD/N

Jessica is a clinical outpatient dietitian for CoxHealth serving the Monett and Springfield areas. She has been in practice for 10 years and has a background in military medical administration. She enjoys spending time with her daughter and husband and surrounding family in Mt. Vernon and the St. Louis area. They have recently relocated back from Florida and are happy to be “home” to their Missouri roots.

National Nutrition Month: ‘Beyond The Table’

Hello March! Many people are not aware, but March is National Nutrition Month® which helps bring awareness to the importance of making informed food choices and developing sound eating and physical activity habits.

This year’s theme is “Beyond the Table,” which is sponsored by The Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics with more information available at eatright.org® In this article, we will explore my perspective on ways we can go “Beyond the Table” this year.

As a registered dietitian, this theme speaks to me in many ways, one being community. Living a healthy life is more about food itself, it is also a sense of community in whom we share the foods and life experiences with as well. According to the Blue Zones Project (2023) we spend 90 percent of our time in the same places, with the same people, and that environment dictates how easy or difficult it is to make healthy choices. Surround yourself with a positive community and see how things can change. Movement.

I also see this as another simple puzzle piece most of us are lacking. Studies suggest we have a lower risk of early death if we stand or walk around during

the daytime compared to sitting at a desk. We are also less likely to be overweight, develop heart disease or type 2 diabetes, and experience depression and anxiety (Emerson, 2023). Keep it simple, fun, and be as consistent as possible to get the best results in the long-term.

Grow your own food.

Another area of interest and improvement we could all make is having a small garden to grow some of our own foods. This can not only get us outside more (“Hello, vitamin D”), but it is a wonderful way to teach our kids

about where food comes from and there is nothing more ‘farmto-table’ than your own backyard. If you are unsure where to start, connect with your local whole foods’ stores for more resources. Herb Depot Organic Market in Monett or Mama Jean’s Natural Markets in Springfield have been my favorite local spots.

Lastly, there is an app for that!

Technology can be overwhelming and confusing for many of us, especially with how fast things change, but we can also use it to our advantage. Find an app (or

Recommended App: MyNetDiary

two) that can bring you closer to your health goals. Whether that be a food app (my patients like My Net Diary) or positive affirmation app (I like “I AM”), we can go “Beyond the Table” and look at our health as a combination of diet and lifestyle habits that can bring us back into balance.

In conclusion, in honor of National Nutrition Month ® I encourage us all to look “Beyond the Table” this year and challenge our current habits and behaviors and see where we can improve. Do not be overwhelmed, minor changes can be impactful and keep in mind your current habits and behaviors have been in place for decades (for most of us), so we cannot expect those habits to unwind overnight.

Be SMART (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, and Timely) with your goal setting and do not discount the most valuable thing I have seen in practice these past 10 years: support. Be encouraged, be well, and go “Beyond the Table” this year. n

by Krista Turner

Spring Returns

Going into spring from winter is one of my favorite transitions each year. It’s a new beginning. Life explodes from the cold, barren and hardened soil. Limbs of arthritic trees grow heavy with buds, signaling a new flood of life is just shortly ahead. Sleepy animals emerge from their hideaways, ready to play and soak up the sun that has been hidden away.

Pops of color seem to adorn the earth overnight. Rain falls and the thirsty ground gulps it up, nourishing the roots that are woven deeply below. Spring peepers sing in a symphony of joy and praise. The sky is bluer, the sun more brilliant, the breeze is warm and refreshing. The anticipation is over.

If you think about it, our lives are much the same. Cold seasons of loss, grief, sickness, financial strain, loneliness, and the like can overtake us and can harden our hearts. Life seems to wither as emotions cast a shadow over our landscape. We pull away from the things that are painful and hide, hoping it will quickly pass. Like the winter air, we become sharp and frigid. It feels nearly impossible to see any hope on the horizon. Still, these are just seasons. Temporary. Nobody is immune to the trials of life. We are all promised our fair share of

disappointment and events that are beyond our control. Our faith will be tested, and we will not always pass the exam.

When these events make their way into life, we must learn to turn to the light, even if it feels like we are crawling at a snail’s pace. Looking forward to the next season can seem a pointless exercise. But remember, “spring” is around the corner. We must

embrace the future and let go of the dead things holding us back from growth. The past is only for reflection; we cannot unpack and take up residence there. It is not the end destination on our map. We press on.

In Isaiah 43:18-19, we are reminded that Christ is in the business of life. The scripture states: “Do not remember the former things, nor consider the things

of old. Behold, I will do a new thing, now it shall spring forth, shall you not know it? I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.”

What an amazing promise! We may not have been able to choose our circumstances, but we can easily choose not to stay stuck. We can stagnate in the past or we can move on toward the new. We can choose to let the healing waters flow into the deserts of our heart, or we can take our disappointments and regrets and build a dam to keep the waters upstream. Christ has already cleared a path for us, but we cannot stay on course and appreciate the journey if we are looking to the past or clinging to things we cannot change or do over.

The trees do not crumble in grief when their leaves fall to the ground leaving them bare and vulnerable. They certainly do not wail and complain that they are heavy with snow. They do not run from place to place looking for the sun or the rains. They are deeply rooted and standing tall. Steadfast. Solid.

With patience and a silent grace, they wait on Him to shine the light and bring the new season again. They wait for God to turn the page because He always has and that is enough. Be ready friends, the light is just ahead. I know the winter feels so long, but it will end just like it always has before. You will not thirst forever. It will not always be this dark or sparse. Cling to His promise in faithful confidence. Stand firm in tough conditions, root deeply in the Word, drink in that Living Water and bloom. n

Beautiful Sisters

Jasmine and Scarlett Buchholz find a common passion in pageant competition

When Jasmine Buchholz was just eight, she was so shy, talking to people came very hard to her.

“I was so shy, I would not even order my own drink at a restaurant,” she said.

Today, the 17-year old Aurora High School student actively competes in beauty pageants and occasionally models clothes.

Jasmine is the current World Elite’s Miss Teen. Other pageant titles she’s held include: Young Miss Table Rock Lake, Young Miss Branson, Missouri Jr. Teen Pageant land USA, America’s Elegant Miss Missouri Jr. Teen, America’s Elegant Miss National Jr. Teen, and Princess of America Missouri Ambassador. Jasmine credits her involvement in the pageants with helping her to overcome her shyness.

“I started with local pageants and fell in love and went bigger,” she said.

Competing in pageants has opened doors for the Aurora teen. In February of 2022, she traveled to New York City, where she helped model clothing from the Tiffany Line, a collection of clothing by Charjean Couture during

Story by Steve Chapman

New York Fashion Week. While she was there, she had the opportunity to see some of New York City’s most iconic attractions, including Times Square, the Statue of Liberty and the 9/11 memorial. She also got to take in a Broadway production of “The Lion King.”

“I haven’t done runway recently, but have had a few photo shoots and will be traveling to Arkansas in the spring for another,” she said. “My favorite runway by far was New York Fashion Week (NYFW) both times. It was such a unique event. Plus, it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity that I got to experience twice. Miami Swim Week was also a fun runway show and so different than NYFW.”

Jasmine has more than one platform where she gives back to the community; she maintains a little food pantry in the Aurora town square and “Community Connections,” a movement where she worked to bridge the gap between local businesses and members of Generation Z. However, the one that she has worked on the longest is “Jasmine’s Journals,” where she provides children

Jasmine Buchholz, World Elite’s Miss Teen

Scarlet Buchholz, International United Miss Princess

“Jasmine’s

in the foster care system with journaling supplies to help them cope with their situation. She said she does this because journaling helped her during a difficult time.

“During my parents brutal custody battle,” she said, “I used journaling as my primary coping mechanism. I wanted to share that with kids and teens who might not have someone to talk to about their experiences.”

Outside of modeling and her pageant work, Jasmine is also involved in extracurricular activities at school, including National Honors Society, Future Teachers of America, Student Council, the Youth Employment Project, Science Club and Jobs for America’s Graduates; she also has time to volunteer and even holds a job.

“Since I have been involved in many things for years,” she said, “I have mastered time management. This skill helps me set time aside for myself and my family.”

Jasmine’s favorite subject in school is English, and this has led her to another ambition.

“For as long and I can remember,” she said, “I have always loved to read and write. Growing up, I wanted to be an author, and publishing a book has been on my bucket list since I was eight.

Scarlett Buchholz, Jasmine’s little sister, is following in her footsteps. At seven years old, she is the current International United Miss Princess.

Scarlett said her big sister’s influence convinced her to compete in pageants.

“My sister did them,” she said, “and when I was old enough my mom let me because I wanted to be just like my big sister.

“I love doing pageants because I get to help people, and talk on stage about community service, and make friends that like the same things as me.”

So far, Scarlett said, her favorite pageant was Princess of America.

Journals” is Jasmine’s project for children in the foster care system with journaling supplies to help them cope with their situation. She said she does this because journaling helped her during a difficult time.

“I made a lot of friends,” she said, “and we had a pink party. That is my favorite thing.”

Just as Jasmine has “Jasmine’s Journals,” Scarlett has her own platform, “Scarlett’s Scribbles.” She said made her platform similar to Jasmine’s, only for younger children.

“My big sister started Jasmine’s Journals to help older kids in foster care and the family court system,” she said, “and I knew there were also little kids with big feelings that I could help.”

In her free time, Scarlett takes gymnastics, volleyball, reading, playing with her dogs and practicing the violin. Scarlett said she decided to take up the violin after seeing somebody play one online.

“I wanted to play because it seemed fun,” she said, “and I saw someone on YouTube playing a plastic violin, and I wanted to entertain people.”

Scarlett said she hasn’t decided yet whether she would like to be a teacher or a veterinarian when she grows up.

“I love school and animals, (so) it’s hard to choose,” she said.

In the meantime, Scarlett is focused on winning a pageant which will take place in Florida.

“I’m representing Missouri next summer in Orlando for International United Miss, and I’m really excited,” she said. “Someday, I want to be Miss Teen USA.” n

Purchase 11:59

Local

AUTHOR SPOTLIGHT

Ah, the magnetic appeal of a mystery. An intriguing plot filled with unpredictable twists and turns. It is an emotional roller coaster ride irresistible to readers young and old. Hard to put down, booklovers cannot resist the challenge of hunting for clues and solving the puzzle before the characters in the story.

Author Marlon S. Hayes has crafted a mystery that will keep the reader on the edge of their seats until the last page of his new novel 11:59. As with any master storyteller, Marlon has carefully created plot twists and planted clues, nudging the reader to turn the pages with an insatiable curiosity to discover the ominous mystery of the ticking clock and the passing of time.

At 11:59, Rob Jackson, the sto-

ries main character, watches the clock as each second slips away. He realizes there comes a moment in everyone’s life when everything finally makes sense. It becomes clear the domino effect that each event of your life had on the next, and you know that where you are is exactly where you’re supposed to be.

With each stroke of the clock, he relives the events that brought him to the present time of 11:59. Throughout this journey, he discovers nothing in his life was ever as it seemed. Although Jackson strives to build a relationship with his biological father, the constant search for his approval only results in heartbreak and tragedy. He tries to

Marlon Hayes

overcome his bitterness, loneliness, and disappointments with the help of the women he meets along the way. Octavia, a mentor, and guide; Dolores, a friend and partner; and then Nora, the woman he believes to be his soulmate.

With time being his ultimate nemesis, Jackson stares at the clock as the final domino falls.

Author of 11:59

Story by Schyrlet Cameron

only fits into some specific category, so he goes wherever the story takes him. It might be a romance, a ghost tale, or a suspense novel that leaves readers on the edge of their seats.

Marlon likes to work on multiple projects simultaneously to avoid getting bogged down when a story hits a wall. He’s currently working on a suspense thriller, a Western novel, and a coming-of-age story. His latest two releases are a Western novel, A Man Named Purse, and a short story collection, Gauntlets and Conches Volume One, with fellow author Gordon Bonnet. He is also in the process of putting the finishing touches on the audiobook for his novel 11:59 and performing and producing audiobooks for other authors.

In addition to writing and recording, Marlon makes time to enjoy his other passions. Each year, he attends the annual family reunion; with his wife, their two daughters, and grandson. He takes a trip to see a game while investigating local barbecue joints and sometimes, he stumbles upon a unique salt and pepper set to add to his curio cabinet filled with his remarkable finds. He’s also best friends with his passport. His goal is to use it four times a year in his quest to visit at least fifty countries to match his domestic feat of visiting every state. His count is currently twenty-two.

Marlon’s mantra is “Life is a banquet,” and he does his best to follow it. He’s also a willing mentor and soundboard for other creatives, no matter their artistic passion. He believes allotting time to support and encourage others is necessary to the psyche of every artist. He can be followed on social media at Marlon’s Writings and contacted at marlonshayes@gmail.com. n

by Manndi Maphies

Amannda (Manndi) Maphies, hometown Monett, Mo., works at the UMKC School of Pharmacy, is a mother to two human boys, two furry boys (dog, Atlas, and cat, Hamilton), and enjoys freelance writing based on her travels, life adventures, and pretty much anything that stands out in life as “story-worthy.”

True Sportmanship

I witnessed something truly magnificent last night at my son’s middle school basketball game. Honestly, it was not even his game in which this treasured sight was revealed. The Greenwood Bluejays were in their second evening of a week-long tournament in Humans ville, Missouri; a small, blink-andyou’ll-miss-it-southern-Missouritown.

The girls’ team from our school, the Lady Bluejays, had just mopped the floor with the opposing team in this particular bracket. They won by a landslide. While I only caught the tail end of this game, coming in hot to see my son play, as I was settling into my cozy, hard-backed, folding stadium chair, I happened to look up just in time to see both teams of female basketball players line up to participate in the routine high (or low) five and typical monotone, “Good Game,” that is customary at the end of each athletic competition.

did something a little extra. With the hand not shaking her opposing teammates’ hands, she gently patted each player on the shoulder. Every single player. In a very humbling, “You’re great! I enjoyed playing against you. I value you as a person and as a player,” sort of way. It was truly breathtaking and eye-opening. I had never seen such a show of… compassion, especially from the losing team!

ness. But one person in the stands did. Me.

This young lady went out of her way, even in a losing state of mind, to be polite, upbeat, kind, and gracious to the opposing team. I can only imagine she serves as the captain (or perhaps she should) of her own basketball team. While the scoreboard showed a harrowing win by my son’s school, I saw a winner of a different category on that wooden planked gymnasium floor. I saw something greater than a big tournament win. I saw sportsmanship that goes beyond the game. Kindness and true value for others that shines beyond the spotlight of athleticism and structured competition. Sportsmanship that beautifully bleeds over into the metaphorical game of life.

One young lady caught my eye. She was on the opposing team, that lost... by a rather noticeable number, profoundly displayed on the overhead scoreboard. You would have thought she felt defeated, or humbled, by the landslide victory of the opposing team, our very own Lady Bluejays. Perhaps she did. However, you could not tell. At all. I watched, perched high in the stands of that unfamiliar school gymnasium, as that young lady not only gave every opposing team member a heartfelt

I was intrigued by this show of sportsmanship, that is truly atypical. Many times, a player on the losing team refuses to even make contact. Or worse yet, a player on the winning team utters a confrontational and prideful unsportsmanlike phrase under their breath. This young athlete, however, went so far as to offer the same graceful handshake, award winning smile, and kind shoulder pat to the opposing coach in addition to the team of girls she had just competed against. I am honestly not sure if our players, the coaches, or the administration sitting nearby noticed this small act of kindhearted-

I saw a young lady that was so confident in herself, that she exuded a gift of grace and kindness to others. Even those that had, moments before, harshly claimed victory over her own team. That is true sportsmanship. That goes beyond sportsmanship into the realm of human connection. As proud as I was of our female Bluejays last night, seeing this small act of maturity and devotion to humanity, from a middle schooler no less, caused my soul to smile even bigger.

Sports are about so much more than winning and losing. They teach us to remain kind and loving, even during a losing season.

Especially during a losing season. They teach us to remain humble and graceful, because the game can so easily shift from losing to winning, with just a simple tweak of plays, mindset, mentality, player substitutions, and ability. Sports teach us that the true victors are not necessarily the ones that win the coveted large, shiny tournament trophy, and get their names and pictures plastered into the school hallway showcase for future generations to see. Rather, they are the ones that invest in others, show kindness at every turn, and realize that no matter the season, in win or in loss, the way we treat others and the character displayed when the chips are just a little down, that is the genuine mark of a true winner.

Hands down, high fives, fist bumps, and a graceful pat on the back to this forward-thinking young lady athlete that stood out to me as the Most Valuable Player of last night’s tournament championship basketball games. With her positive attitude and gentle grace toward others, she will no doubt go far in life. Both on and off the basketball court, where so many hard lessons are learned, which beautifully translate to future life seasons defined by mountain-top highs, deep-valley lows, excitement, unrest, confusion, congratulations, devastation, heartbreak, euphoria, or simply “it is what it is.”

Whatever the situation or season may be, this young lady, I don’t even know her name, shared a very important lesson with me, and hopefully others in the crowd and on the floor. The true character of a person lies not in their ability, gifts, or achievements, it lies in the graceful, humble, and caring heart that a person extends to those around them, in every season of life. n

MAKING ART BLOOM MAKING ART BLOOM

discovery through artwork

Making art, that most prized form of creativity, is one of the most mysterious and transformative experiences. Ideas spring from all directions, then take shape and form to blossom on a canvas, a pottery wheel, a loom or any number of other mediums. How does an idea become art? What magical process is needed?

How to make art blossom in the young and largely unskilled is a task for a magician, and yet that is the job of an art teacher. For Monett High School art teachers Jennifer Leeper and Elizabeth Wallsmith, that’s their profession. What comes out of their classrooms surprises them and their students, and can be life changing.

Leeper and Wallsmith both teach Art 1 and 2, then Wallsmith teaches advanced art, ceramics and portfolio, the project-focused highest course. Both see students who arrive needing a credit without much interest in art. The teachers have to engage their charges.

“A lot of students haven’t had art since fifth grade,” Leeper said. “It’s a challenge. I have foundational art classes. We do a little bit of the history of different techniques and how to use the media you’re working with.”

“I incorporate in Art 1 making art practical and meaningful,” said Wallsmith. “Why was art essential before photography? I teach understanding the masters, using the knowledge

they used about oils and acrylics, cost and materials.”

After experimenting in drawing insects and animals, using colored pencils and playing with shading, Leeper had her students create selfies – drawn self-portraits – that went on display in the school hallway. Students took photographs of themselves, placed that over a grid, then drew the faces from square to square.

“As they begin trusting the process, the students grew more interested,” she said.

Thus the process begins. The question of talent surfaces, but is that the defining factor?

“You can have talent and do noth-

ing with it,” Wallsmith said, “or have talent and be able to share it, even sell an item you created. If you have natural talent, similar to sports, you still have to be coachable. As a teacher, it’s important to me to make sure my approach is for everyone, not that this person isn't talented. It’s one thing getting ideas to approach a certain outcome when you haven’t developed the skills to do that.”

Gradually the art teachers introduce those skills. Leeper introduces perspective drawing, using rulers, putting lines together so students overcome their fear of organic shapes.

“As they see space opening, they add details and start seeing what creativity can add, and they start getting hooked,”

Leeper said.

“This year I had a couple students who came in just for a credit. They’re just now realizing that by trusting the process, I can do some things. It’s just getting more confidence. They stop me in the hallway and tell me how much they’re enjoying coming to class now. That lifts my spirits, and makes me feel like I’m getting something done.”

“For me as an art teacher,” Wallsmith said, “focus is skill, even at an advanced level. Even a master can learn a new skill and utilize it in a new way so art can still be an adventure.

“I don’t teach with the idea that this student will be an artist one day. That’s a small group. A student could change

their mind and pick up something they got in high school years later, like doing crocheting at a county fair. The fascinating thing about art is that an experienced viewer or a community member looking at artwork can’t tell if it’s the result of pure talent or skill.”

As Wallsmith receives students into more advanced classes, she can see what level they have reached and provide additional knowledge that “makes those pieces bloom.”

“In advanced art, I talk to each student, helping them have goals, giving them deadlines to meet,” she continued. “I talk about multiple approaches so they can begin being creative. They must give a description of what they’re

Edgar Mercado working on carving his linoleum for printmaking. Kaleb Bennett practicing his color wheel.

Haelei Stella preparing her linoleum for the final color in her printmaking

going to do and the medium they’re going to use. They make a rough draft so they have a plan. Then they have a due date. To work independently, a student has to be self-driven. That comes from them. It doesn’t have to be because of talent or skill. If a student doesn’t have the willingness to do it, they don’t have the outcome that can be shared. I want to be able to cultivate artwork to share in the community.”

Wallsmith noted that in the past 30 years, technology has expanded what kinds of art a student can create. Digital photography, graphic design programs and social media outlets have transformed opportunities. Wallsmith may enlist the photography or other available resources at the Scott Regional Technology Center not in her classroom that help students explore new avenues. One of her students, Dakota Main, is making sculpture, a new process for Wallsmith, and it’s not clear yet if the large bust of a figure she made will dry or survive the oven to its final form.

“If there are failures in art, maybe it’s not you that failed,” she said. “Maybe it’s something in the piece. How do you address that? If it’s not glued right or falls apart, you learn how to avoid that in the future. What we do is problem solving. My job is to walk them through pitfalls or possibilities, getting them to trust. We’re training them to be a citizen in the community and in a workplace.

“Maybe through art we learn to have a vision, and how a vision can be possible and come to life. In sharing your art, you are vulnerable. Putting your work out there is taking a risk. How do you make that into a positive? How does your art communicate to an audience? I want my students to grasp that when you put it on canvas or paper or clay, does the audience share

that? Are you OK as an artist if someone doesn’t relate in that way? You’ve got to be able to step away from a piece and let a person relate to it in the way they do.”

Wallsmith observed that art opens doors. In addition to introverts, she has found students who don’t speak much English don’t go to band or choir. They come to art. There they find a voice.

“Art doesn’t force you to treat it or be entertained,” she said. “You choose to be engaged by art. If you have knowledge about art or have experienced art, you’re more likely to give art a second chance. I think art teaches second chances.”

Leeper observed she always has students that surprise her. “There might have been a student that found art tiresome and was frustrated all year. When they get to the end, and they like it, they think it’s the greatest and want to do more. There are others who may say, ‘Been there, done that,’ and don’t come back. You can’t tell who will go further with art or not. It’s easy to find those who find the ‘aha’ moment. That’s the most rewarding.”

Leeper gives students a questionnaire at the end of the year to find what they liked and didn’t, and what they wished they had done.

“That tells me a lot,” she said. “All little kids like to draw. I don’t know at what point you lose the idea that you can be an artist. By the end of the class, students realize, ‘I can do some art!’”

Leeper is a professional artist herself, and has shown work in the Fresh Gallery in Springfield. She focuses on specific genres or media that students work on at the time, and finds working with them broadens her own experience.

Wallsmith, who has taught in Monett for six years, sees herself as someone

Adri Whisenhunt has placed Best of Show in crafts at Big 8 for the past two years with her fiber artworks.

Advanced Art student Emma Hensley with her painting at the Spiva Center for the Arts and by her current painting.

Brisa Ontiveros Villa, grade 11, Monett High School. Her flag design was selected and then made into a flag that hung during Youth Art Month at the Capital.

with more drive than talent. A painting in ink of an Asian landscape, done by her father, a natural talent, hangs in her classroom as a reminder and an inspiration.

“I ask my students how is art relevant?” she said. “How does what you do matter, more than a grade or a credit? In your future family, someone may have a desire to do art. How do you foster that? Art helps us sometimes to get outside of ourselves. Art opens conversation, whether you enjoy a piece or not. Important art isn’t always practical. Art has to be fun. That’s what I teach, and what I hope I’ve inspired. Art has provided that in my life. It’s something that hasn’t failed me.” n

Pyper Williams is in Portfolio Art class and loves working with a variety of mediums and subjects.

Ti Reh is a graduate of 22-23 and placed 1st at Big 8 for his portrait drawing.

Dakota Main is a senior in Portfolio art class.

Piper Congrats

Email your child’s photo to: monettcommunity@ gmail.com

Photos should be sent in the original JPG format at the highest resolution possible. Remember to include your child’s name, parent’s name, age, city and your contact information.

The contest is open to children ages 10 and younger. The photos submitted will be used for the sole purpose of this contest.

Piper, 18-month-old daughter of Brandon and Nikie Flynn, of Cassville

by Meagan Ruffing

Meagan Ruffing is a marriage and family therapist and parenting journalist. Each year that goes by is another year she moves forward. Meagan enjoys counse ling other single moms in their journey to find inner peace.

How to Move Forward as a Single Mom

The month of March can feel like the perfect time to get rid of the old and welcome the new.

You’re three months into the new year and possibly feeling like you’re ready to move on. So, what does moving on look like as a single mom? Moving on can look like trying a dating app and potentially getting back out into the dating world. Or, moving on could look like selling your house and buying a new one. Whatever your moving on is, let it be well thought out and intentional. Doing things as a single mom can be both exciting and scary. My advice is to think about the kind of life you want and then work towards making that happen.

I am way more confident in my single mom abilities in 2024 than I was in 2019. I don’t freak out about household things like a clogged toilet or mowing the lawn. And I’m fully capable of putting air in my tires or hanging Christmas lights. It didn’t start out that way, though. It took years of self-doubt and worry that I wouldn’t do it right or I needed a man to do it for me. I don’t feel that way anymore because of the amazing women I’ve had in my life who have shown me that I can do all those things and so much more.

Whether you’re newly single or several years out from your divorce, moving on is necessary. Figuring out what you need and where you’re at in your healing

process will determine what your next move is. Don’t know where to begin? Here are some simple ways to figure that out.

Make a bucket list.

I want you to write down all the things you’ve always wanted to do before you were married, when you were married, and now that you’re divorced. Put them all down in one place and start checking things off. You will be amazed how refreshing and empowering it feels to start living your life and checking things off your bucket list.

What are you talking about the most? Think about the thing or

things you seem to be talking to your friends and even family about all the time. What’s the thing that’s stuck in your head that bothers you so much you keep looking for validation from everyone else?

Figure out what that thing is and go to therapy. That thing is probably part of what’s holding you back and keeping you from moving on. For me, it was the feeling of things being unfair. Everything felt unfair and so it was hard for me to be happy for anyone who was starting a new relationship or getting remarried. I had to figure out where my anger was coming from and deal with it so I could let that go and move forward with my own happiness.

Forgive yourself.

Single moms are usually the hardest on themselves. We have to keep it all together. We have to be the mom and the dad. We have to earn the money and run the home. We have to be fun and be the disciplinarian. We have to balance self-care and raising kids. When we get it wrong, we beat ourselves up about it. Simply put - blaming ourselves every time something goes wrong is much easier than crying ourselves to sleep for the one millionth time over a former life we no longer have. Let that stuff go. Forgive yourself for whatever it is that you’re holding on to. It may have served a purpose for you at one time, but it no longer is.

Laugh again.

Find things to do that make you laugh. See a comedy show. Have a girls’ night. Ride a rollercoaster. Do something ridiculously silly. Laughing is good for your soul and it’s also good for your kids to see their mom be happy again. I bet you’ve been holding it all in and I bet you haven’t had much to laugh about, lately.

Laughing after a divorce has a whole different feel. It becomes child-like again, and you may start to rediscover the parts of you that were lost during your marriage. Laughing also emits and attracts a whole new energy. People will feel your joy and that my friend, is part of how you move on.

Moving on doesn’t mean that you’ve forgotten the bad things that have happened to you or that you are necessarily okay with becoming a single mom but what it does mean, is that you are freeing up prime real estate in your mind to create space for growth and growth is vital when moving on. n

MONETT’S NEW REAL-ESTATE MOGULS

MONETT’S NEW REAL-ESTATE MOGULS

Accident with iPhone led Jason Kurima to start his own business. Now he and wife Haley own several business ventures

You never know when an opportunity is going to present itself, or how. In 2016, when Jason Kurima broke his iPhone, at first, all he could see was misfortune.

“I didn’t really know what to do,” he said. “Like, I didn’t have the money to fix it, so I kind of panicked for a little bit.”

But, after he had “flipped out for 15 minutes,” Jason decided to try fixing the phone himself.

“A bunch of stuff was wrong with it,” he said, “so I worked on it on this itty bitty coffee table and ordered the parts online. (I watched) YouTube videos to figure it out, and luckily I did figure it out, but it took me three hours.”

At first, the phone didn’t work the way it was supposed to, but Jason fig-

Story by Steve Chapman

ured out how to fix that as well.

“I turned the screen on,” he said, “and it had lines through it that weren’t there originally, and so I like flipped out for like 15 minutes, came back and just realized the cables weren’t pushed in all the way. And it was fixed.”

With the iPhone fixed, Jason decided that he could possibly go into business for himself by fixing other people’s phones as well, so he started his own mobile iPhone repair service, where he would meet people at a location like a gas station, take their phone, repair them right at the location, and then hand the phone back to the owners and get paid. However, he added, while the people he did repairs for were happy with his work, appearances were another story.

“I’d meet people at gas stations and fix (their phones) in my car and then … 20 minutes later, I’d hand it to them. They’d be like, ‘Wow, this is awesome! Thank you so much for for fixing my phone.’ But it also looked really sketchy, like a drug deal, because they hand you a wad of cash.”

Jason said this led to him and Haley opening a brick and mortar location for the iPhone service at Kyler Corners in Monett. The two of them put in some long hours getting the location ready for customers.

“We’d go to school and then work, or vice-versa,” he said, “and then, at 6 p.m., we’d go to the office and start painting it until midnight or 1 a.m., and then we’d repeat the process everyday until we finished it.”

Later, Jason said, he and Haley decided to try their hand at real estate.

“Even when we were dating,” he said, “we were always really interested in real estate; we always wanted to flip houses. My wife always had the idea that she

wanted to just always do it on the side. Like on weekends, work on houses ourselves and stuff like that.

“But I’m not very handy, so I was like, well, this isn’t going to work very well, and I don’t want to be stuck on a project for forever. So, what I did is, on our first investment, we bought a little house in Pierce City, and we rented it out. And it ended up working out to where one of our employees rented it from us.”

After a couple of years, Jason said, the employee moved out of the house, and he and Haley decided to sell it, and after that, continued investing in real estate.

“We made… a $25,000 profit,” Jason said, “and then moved on, and around that time, I met a partner, and we started investing together. And then … over the next two years, we flipped seven or eight houses and, we just kind of tried to get to where we could do bigger investments and get nicer places over time.”

Today, Jason said, he and Haley con-

tinue to flip houses, but they have also owned a number of apartment complexes, which they run themselves. They still run their iPhone repair business, iPhone Restorations, and have plans to open an event center in the near future. Jason also hosts the Kurima Podcast, where they discuss mainly real estate, but also topics such as business, finance and entrepreneurship.

Jason said he is often taken aback when he thinks about how far he and Haley have come in their venture together.

“It’s really cool to look back and see where we started, and where we’re at today,” he said.

Kurima Enterprises/iPhone Restorations is located at 602 13th Street in Monett. For more information, call (417)505-3787 for real estate and (417)489-1551 for iPhone Restorations, or visit their Facebook pages. You can also see their websites at www. kurimarealestate.com and www.iphonerestorations.com. n

SAIGE

Email your pet’s photo to: monettcommunity@gmail.com

If you think your furry or feathered friend is the cutest in the area, let us know! We invite you to share a photo of your pet to be featured in Connection’s Cutest Pet contest. Photos should be sent in the original JPG format at the highest resolution possible. Remember to include your pet’s name, city of residence and your contact information.

Saige miniature poodle and fur baby of Jessica Howe, of Cassville

by Christa Stout

C.A.R.E. offers support for animals large and small. Visit their websites, specializing in domestic and farm animals.

Making the Way for More Adoptions

This month’s trip was to the C.A.R.E. Adoption Center in Springfield.

As you may know, C.A.R.E. stands for Castaways Animal Rescue Effort, and that is truly what they do. Not only do they have the adoption Center in Springfield, but also the C.A.R.E. Sanctuary outside of Verona/ Aurora, including the Farm Sanctuary where animals of all kinds can be found. They are the largest no-kill shelter in southwest Missouri.

Their Mission is:

 To rescue as many adoptable animals from death row as we can properly provide and care for.

 To provide medical treatment for sick and injured stray animals.

 To combine an aggressive spay and neuter program with a high-volume adoption program while providing quality lifetime care for unadoptable pets.

 To network and provide a rescue service for other shelters, ultimately reducing the kill rate in southwest Missouri.

But back to my trip to Springfield, I met with Rob who takes care of the Adoption Center and is very knowledgeable about the adoptable animals. For the first time I saw Rob a little disheartened because, like all shelters,

there are always more animals that need to be rescued than there are fosters and adopters to love on these sometimes neglected, sometimes abandoned and sometimes mistreated animals. So, if you are interested in adopting an animal, please consider the C.A.R.E. or any of the nonprofit shelters, sanctuaries and pounds, they work so hard to save animals and their facilities have been full and sometimes overfull for so many months. Every animal that is adopted in this fashion allows another animal to be rescued.

The wonderful people working with the animals are subject to compassion fatigue because the work takes a toll on these hardworking, kind and loving folks. And believe me, the pay they are receiving is not enough to make up for all the heartache and inhumanity they are seeing on a daily basis.

I asked Rob what he would like me to ask of our readers and he promptly said that of course, spay and neuter your animals is number one, this is the only way we will ever get out of this overabundance of animals and euthanasians because there is not enough room. And the second thing is, please don’t get yourself into untenable situations when taking an animal into your home - consider the expense of keeping an animal and the time you will need to spend with the

animal as well as the space needed for the animals.

Animals are not free, they need love and care from their owners and possible veterinary care, such as vaccinations and monthly preventives are not cheap. He simply asked that people make sure they know the extent of change in their lives, financial and emotional. And please remember that adopting an animal is for the length of their lives and/or yours.

Rob told me about a rescue they had the week before, a Golden Retriever mix named MOLLY She was found by animal control and promptly after her arrival she had four puppies. She had been hiding her pregnancy very well. Molly and her pups are pictured below. Mom already has an adopter and the pups are up for adoption now. You can see more pictures of them on C.A.R.E.’s facebook page.

Another rescue involved BELLE, the beautiful little kitty in the picture. Belle came to C.A.R.E. at 10 months, pregnant by one of her siblings. The brothers were promptly adopted, but Belle

became sickly. She had Coccidia which resulted in diarrhea, dehydration, no appetite and loss of weight. It was decided, with veterinary help, that in order to save her life, the pregnancy needed to be terminated. She was treated, became healthy and is now a playful kitten with a fierce and funny personality. So many animals, not just dogs and cats, but farm animals, ie. horses and pigs, and small animals, such as rabbits, raccoons, etc. are being rescued and taken care of by C.A.R.E. Please, if you can, help them out so they can continue to keep animals from being euthanized or killed. Their fund raiser for a new Mobile Adoption Trailer, their previous one was stolen is available through this QR code. A

flea and tick preventative – the winter has not been strong enough to kill some of these pests. And of course, Heart Worm Preventive is an absolute must.

“If one does not know to which port one is sailing, no wind is favourable.

- Seneca the Younger

HAVE A PASSION FOR SERVING YOUR COMMUNITY?