foam
shields
Parko’s Pied Piper Booger Train
Like lambs to the slaughter.
Scientists have now established why the bodyboarding population of the world is being decimated. It is down to a one-man extermination unit, the popular Australian pro surfer Joel Parkinson. The normally affable and easy going ‘Parko’ has a sideline hobby, a dark passenger if you prefer, where he lures bodyboarders to their watery graves in an effort to cleanse the world’s line-ups of the beflippered kind. Inspired by the noted Germanic serial killer ‘The Pied Piper of Hamelin’ Gold Coast resident Parkinson lures his prey to their doom by singing a hypnotic version of the popular bodyboarding anthem ‘Ripping The Pit’ with the chorus, “This is the time of our lives, we got it all!” and like the German children of myth the boogers follow the hypnotic sound of his voice, often forming booger trains as they surf or kick after him. How he then dispatches of the poor lid riders is not known, this extraordinary story has only come to light thanks to this chance photo from our lensman Mr Andrew Shield, who was quoted as saying, “everyone round here’s turning a blind eye to Parko’s little hobby, more waves for the rest of us aye?”
surfer jobs Surf photographer
Everyone wants to be a surf photog’, lord knows why as the pay is minimal, conditions awful and you get to miss the best surf you will ever witness in your life. Getting there: No formal training is required, many big name professional surf photog’s are self taught, although many of the best water photog’s come from a bodyboarding background- Mickey Smith, Tim Jones, Jeff Flindt, Scott Aichner etc. Used to the swim-fins and being in heavy situations see. Skill set required: Rich parents, fat credit card limit or a monk like zeal to work your nuts off at any job to get the cash together for equipment; because photography is all about the gear. You cannot be a pro surf photog just fannying around with arty film and old cheap cameras. These days a Canon 7D, housing, plus all the lenses, tripods and other stuff is a minimum of £10,000. Cash: A double page
spread in a surf mag will pay you £100. Now do the math on how long it will take you to pay for the equipment (not to mention live/eat/pay rent). Surf photography is something best done for the love, not for the reward, because apart from the elite handful of guys worldwide most are living on crumbs and in the UK all the mags have staff photogs. Good bits: Worldwide travel, ultimate job satisfaction, year round perma-tan, hanging out with seriously good people, days off when it rains. Bad bits: Missing good surf, being expected to lug 30kgs of gear around like a pack horse, never pulling (cos pro surfers always bag the ladies), poor pay and conditions, no job security, danger of death. Ambitions: Getting a cover shot is the big ambition. Once you’ve done that in the UK then an international cover (Surfer/ Surfing/ASL etc) is the Holy Grail. That and actually making some money.
mike searle
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FB queen HellYeah!
This month could be entirely filled by Sophie Hellyer’s barbed witticisms but we let a few other people have a go too… Sophie Hellyer David Cameron not only cancelled Eastenders, but he appears to have killed the O2 network all over the UK. We are not off to a good start, you and I, Mr Cameron! Easkey Britton loving the power of Mother Nature and discovering the joys of trains after that ash cloud kept following me around Europe! Lee Bartlett you can tell how flat the surf is by the amount of people on Facebook chat! Sophie Hellyer Perv o’clock on channel 5, does Christiano Ronaldo have the best body? That is correct. Tobias Donachie wants an intelligent, classy, well-educated woman who says f*ck a lot. Sophie Hellyer OMG, did I just actually turn on the TV to a porno with Screech from ‘Saved from the Bell’? Ick!
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The Billabong Pro Santa Catarina was long done by press time (we did the froth online and on FB) but it was a sick event, especially considering the fairy tale ending with Jadson Andre winning in front of a home crowd. But the thing that really made our collective eyeballs go pop and dribble ketchup down our faces was Dane Reynold’s method air. We ♥ Dane…
This is why Dane is a god. This is an ‘air’ reverse, not a lip reverse like that jadson fella.
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