parent CAROLINA
JUNE 2014
n
FREE
the Triangle’s family resource • carolinaparent.com
Stay-at-Home
SUPERDADS Share Advice How Your
BRAGGING
Affects Your Child
136 SUMMER FUN ACTIVITIES
Trials, Triumphs and Takeaways
NC Museum of Life and Science
Mathnasium
Ramp Up Your Math
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Mathnasium of Durham-Chapel Hill 919-490-5151
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carolinaparent.com | JUNE 2014 3 Mathnasium of North Raleigh 919-790-7977
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!USTIN 6IEW "OULEVARD s 7AKE &OREST .# Prices subject to change without notice. Lennar reserves the right to change or withdraw any offer at any time. Copyright © 2014 Lennar Corporation. Lennar, the Lennar logo, Everything’s Included Home and the ei logo are registered service marks of Lennar Corporation and/or its subsidiaries. 6/14
LENNARRALEIGH.COM
inside J U N E
2 0 1 4
features 27 Bragging: Arrogance or Virtue? What Others Think of Your Boasts
30 Fit Family Challenge, Part 3 Trials, Triumphs and Takeaways
33 Racing Toward Family Fun 36 5 Things Moms Can Learn From Stay-At-Home Dads
39 How to Be a Superdad
in every issue 7 Online
8 Editor’s Note
11 Family FYI
Community 11 Craft 12 Education 13 Tips and Picks 15
17 Your Style 18 Growing Up 20 Tech Talk
parent CAROLINA
JUNE 2014
n
22 Understanding Kids
FREE
25 Healthy Families
the Triangle’s family resource • carolinaparent.com
Stay-at-Home
SUPERDADS Share Advice How Your
p. 36, 39
BRAGGING
p. 27
SUMMER FUN ACTIVITIES
136
p. 40
Trials, Triumphs and Takeaways
p. 30
Affects Your Child
40 Calendar Our Picks Daily Father’s Day Festivals July 4th
40 42 42 46 48
50 Faces & Places
carolinaparent.com | JUNE 2014
5
FMN AME bowling
6
CARPM_140600_AMFBowling.indd 1 JUNE 2014 | carolinaparent.com
5/13/14 3:20:20 PM
online J U N E
carolinaparent.com Cool Movie Deals
Get Fit, Win Prizes!
Discover deals on summer movies. … Things to Do Seasonal
Register for our Fit Family Challenge through June 9 and connect to free fitness classes. Gain points for exercising and enter to win a family vacation to Universal Orlando® Resort. … Lifestyle Family Health
Great Getaways Travel to Dollywood or take a Disney Cruise for a relaxing vacation with the kids. Search our articles for “Dollywood” and “Disney.” … Community Contests
Priceless Gifts for Dad
Family Favorites
Triangle mom Jennifer Durbin suggests fabulous free Father’s Day gifts as well as DIY ideas in her blog, The Clueless Chick. … Community Blogs
Where are our readers’ favorite places to eat, shop, dine and play? The results are in! … Community Family Favorites
GPS Our 2014-15 GPS (Go. Play. See.) resource directory is now available on newsstands and at carolinaparent.com/publications/gps/index.php.
GPS t’s 2014-15 CAROLINAparen
go pl ay
1,075
see
FREE
THINGS TO DO PLACES TO SEE USE RESOURCES TO
The Family That Runs Together … Learn about running races as a family. Search our site for “Family Races.” Families sted Resource for The Triangle’s Tru
t.com • carolinaparen
Subscribe to free digital delivery of our magazine on our home page.
Universal elements and all related indicia TM & © 2014 Universal Studios. All rights reserved.
facebook.com/carolinaparent instagram.com/carolinaparent
pinterest.com/carolinaparent twitter.com/carolinaparent
carolinaparent.com | JUNE 2014
7
parent
editor’s note
CAROLINA
Do you brag about your kids? Come on, be honest.
GROUP PUBLISHER Sharon Havranek
PUBLISHER
f you have
I
family should stop getting fit together. Turn
a Facebook
to page 33 for an article on the benefits of
account, the
running together as a family and page 30 for
answer is
a recap of our Fit Family Challenge spotlight
probably, “Yes!”
families’ trials, triumphs and takeaways.
You’ll see …
They share what they have learned during
just take a walk
the eight-week challenge.
through your
posts from the
Triangle students so check out 10 great ’80s
last year. Here’s
movies to watch with your kids this summer
what I found on
on page 15, a Celebration Wreath your kids
my timeline.
can make on page 12 and Associate Editor
“Congratulations to Ben Shugg for successfully auditioning for the N.C. Eastern Regional Orchestra. The second year in a row!” — Facebook (tagged) status update from Jan. 19, 2014 “Ready for the 8th grade dance and awards ceremony. And looking good!” — with Connor Shugg. — Facebook (tagged) photo post from May 17, 2013 “Brag alert! Katie received top offers at both volleyball clubs she tried out at today and has accepted Triangle Volleyball Club’s 12 Black offer!”
Brenda Larson • blarson@carolinaparent.com
always be received by those who are listening the way you would like them to. Our web editor, Odile Fredericks, researched this topic and offers some interesting insight into how bragging may negatively
April Craig
ADVERTISING SALES COORDINATOR Kia Moore • ads@carolinaparent.com
MORRIS VISITOR PUBLICATIONS REGIONAL VICE PRESIDENT
can learn from stay-at-home dads on page
Karen Rodriguez
36. Let’s face it: Guys look at things a little
PRESIDENT
differently than we moms do.
Donna Kessler
Planning a beach vacation this summer?
DIRECTOR OF MANUFACTURING Donald Horton
Our digital media specialist, Lauren Isaacs,
BUSINESS ADMINISTRATOR
rounded up a refreshing collection of coral-
Mary Kate Cline
PUBLICATION MANAGER Kris Miller
favorites are the Marigold Montauk Cover Once the newness of summer vaca-
tion has worn off, the result is often bored children. The Lucy Daniels Center provides targeted advice on page 22 for how to understand and manage a bored child.
Here’s to the beginning of summer and
all things fun, family-friendly and brag-
Candi Griffin • cgriffin@carolinaparent.com
MEDIA CONSULTANTS
“superdad” on page 39, and five things moms
SALES TEAM LEADER • MEDIA CONSULTANT
Regina Alston • ralston@carolinaparent.com Sue Chen • schen@carolinaparent.com Katina Faulkner • kfaulkner@carolinaparent.com
about one father’s various attempts to be a
Up and Azalea Pacific Tote.)
big deal? I’ll tell you. Your boasts may not
WEB PRODUCER
Speaking of dad, you’ll enjoy reading
Gosh, I even prefaced that last status update
I’m quite sure you have, too. What’s the
DIGITAL MEDIA SPECIALIST
Lauren Isaacs • lisaacs@carolinaparent.com
Father’s Day on page 42.
—Facebook status update from Oct. 19, 2013
Yes, I have bragged about my kids and
WEB EDITOR
Odile Fredericks • ofredericks@carolinaparent.com
on page 40. Read about ways to celebrate
Janice Lewine • jlewine@carolinaparent.com
ART DIRECTOR
Janice Lewine’s top calendar picks for June
ASSOCIATE EDITOR • CALENDAR/DIRECTORIES
Cheri Vigna • cvigna@carolinaparent.com
June means school is out for many
themed beach accessories on page 17. (My
with the word “brag.”
EDITOR
Beth Shugg • bshugg@carolinaparent.com
PRODUCTION COORDINATOR Cher Wheeler
CONTACT US
5716 Fayetteville Rd., Suite 201, Durham, NC 27713 phone: 919-956-2430 • fax: 919-956-2427 email: info@carolinaparent.com advertising@carolinaparent.com • editorial@carolinaparent.com Circulation 44,000. Distribution of this magazine does not constitute an endorsement of information, products or services. Carolina Parent reserves the right to reject any advertisement or listing that is not in keeping with the publication’s standards. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited.
worthy, because we know you have much to celebrate and be proud of!
affect the people you’re bragging about and to on page 27. Our Fit Family Challenge winds down this month, but that doesn’t mean your
8
JUNE 2014 |
carolinaparent.com
Beth Shugg, Editor
A publication of the Visitor Publications Division of Morris Communications Company. L.L.C. 725 Broad St., Augusta, GA 30901 Chairman and CEO President William S. Morris III Will S. Morris IV PARENTING MEDIA ASSOCIATION
PARENTING MEDIA ASSOCIATION
2014 Bronze Award Winner
2014 Bronze Award Winner
General Excellence Awards Competition
Design Awards Competition
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family fyi
K IDS WH O EA M AK C E R EN D I FFE
community | craft | education | tips & picks North Carolina Zoo Named Environmental Steward The North Carolina Zoo in Asheboro became the first state agency to be certified in April as an Environmental Steward by the N.C. Department of Environment and Natural Resources. The Stewardship Award recognizes the zoo’s sustainability and conservation efforts in the areas of landfill diversion, energy efficiency and leadership in environmental performance. In addition to the Stewardship Award, the zoo’s Conservation Captains also received a second-place award for group sustainability efforts that saved
Michelle Obama awards the North Carolina Museum of Natural Sciences with the 2014 National Medal for Museum and Library Service at a ceremony in the White House on May 8. Accepting the award are museum director Emlyn Koster and junior curator Molly Paul, 15. Photo courtesy of IMLS
or avoided environmental costs during 2013. Learn more at nczoo.org.
North Carolina Museum of Natural Sciences Receives National Medal The North Carolina Museum of Natural Sciences in Raleigh is one of 10 recipients of this year’s National Medal for Museum and Library Service. The National Medal is the nation’s highest honor given to museums and libraries for service to the community. First lady Michelle Obama presented the medal to Museum Director Emlyn Koster at a special ceremony at the White House on May 8. In addition, the museum – part of the state’s Department of Environment and Natural Resources – recently chose 15-year-old Molly Paul as its exemplar of the institution’s community value. Molly, a junior curator at the museum, was honored for her extraordinary volunteerism and achievements as a knowledgeable voice for the natural world. Molly traveled to Washington for the May 8 celebration, where she shared the impact the museum has had on her life. Learn more at naturalsciences.org.
In an effort to give back to the community and provide a safe and secure way for kids to have fun
Kids Bowl Free this summer, bowling centers across the nation are offering two free games daily to registered participants ages 15 and younger as part of the Kids Bowl Free program. Triangle centers include The Alley in Raleigh and Rainbow Lanes Family Fun Center in Clayton. The program runs through Labor Day weekend. Register at kidsbowlfree.com.
POLL: What summer month does your family typically vacation?
June
July
August
September
It varies
don’t know
22%
39%
13%
9%
17%
0%
carolinaparent.com | JUNE 2014
11
IMACs
CRAFT
Celebration Wreath
Tutor WhereTime one-of-a-kinds get started.
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Care and education, infants to school age. Care and Tour education, infants to school age. our school today!
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Place this festive wreath on the bedroom door of your favorite birthday boy or girl. Or, put it on your front door to share your celebration with the neighborhood. Note: About 150 balloons, 30 snippets of curling ribbon plus enough floral pins to attach all were used on this 12-inch wreath. Amounts will vary depending on the size of the wreath form and your personal taste.
Member of Duke Childcare Partnership M-F, 6:30am-6pm
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JUNE 2014 |
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5/16/14 4:49:18 PM
— Renee Canada
fyi Coming Up With Explanations Develops Thinking Skills
EDUCATION
Southpoint Pediatric Dentistry
Asking children to come up with explanations enhances their cause-and-effect learning abilities, according to new psychology research from The University of Texas at Austin. The study, published in the Journal of Experimental Child Psychology, shows that children who form their own generalizations can more efficiently understand novel information. In the study, researchers presented children ages carolinaparent.com 3-6 with a mechanical toy composed of interlocking gears proof with a crank and propeller. After showing This the children theshows how your ad will appear in our APRIL 2014 issue. toy’s moving parts, researchers separated children into two To ourthe valued client, please review your ad and respond with any changes or approval. If we do n groups and asked them to either explain or observe the toy. you in 48 hours, we will run your ad as it appears here. Thank you. Note: ad proofs may not represent actual size To assess the learning effects of explanatory versus descriptive responses, the researchers prompted the children with moreAS IS U APPROVED U APPROVED WITH CORRECTIONS NOTED U SUBMIT NEW PROO questions about the toy’s appearance and structure. According You can also reach our carolinaparent.com readers! Call your media consultant to discuss benefits of onli to the results of both studies, the explainers across all age groups outperformed other children in understanding ________________________________________________ _______________________ the cause-and-effect operations of the toy. Learn more at Signature Date utexas.edu/news.
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SAVE Celebrates 25th Anniversary The National Association of Students Against Violence Everywhere (SAVE) is celebrating 25 years of educating youth in violence prevention techniques with a campaign to raise CARPM_140500_SouthpointPedDDS.indd 1 4/17/14 10:27:01 AM $25,000. The campaign is calling for 25,000 individuals to donate at least one dollar to establish support chapters in at least Spanish Immersion Full-Time Preschool 125 schools across the country. Local chapters are in Chapel Opening Minds, Opening Opportunities . . . Hill, Durham and Garner. Interested donors can learn more at causes.com/campaigns/74613-help-prevent-youth-violence.
Spanish for Fun
Heritage High Teacher Named Wake County Teacher of the Year The Wake County Public School System has named Heritage High School teacher Allison Reid the 2014 Wake County Teacher of the Year. Reid teaches English to students in grades 9-12 and is the lead English teacher in the new Game Art and Design Academy at Heritage High School. As the Wake County Teacher of the Year, Reid will represent Wake County in the North Carolina Teacher of the Year competition.
Fall registration 2014-2015 is open Register Now for Summer 2014 WAKE FOREST • 919-883-2061
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CARY • 919-677-7114
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10 Great ’80s Movies for Kids Back in the ’80s, a slew of spectacular movies came out that are perfectly fine for your kids
&
fyi
TIPS PICKS
to watch now. Take a walk down memory lane by watching these movies with your kids this summer: The Fox and the Hound – 1981; rated G E.T. the Extra Terrestrial – 1982; rated PG War Games – 1983; rated PG Karate Kid – 1984; rated PG The Goonies – 1985; rated PG An American Tail – 1986; rated G Flight of the Navigator – 1986; rated PG Space Camp – 1986; rated PG The Princess Bride – 1987; rated PG The Little Mermaid – 1989; rated G Note: Some PG movies may now be considered PG-13, a rating that didn’t exist until 1984.
Protect your child’s delicate skin from harmful ultraviolet rays at the pool or beach this summer with Snapper Rock swimsuits and accessories. Snapper Rock’s 2014 line blocks 98 percent of UV rays and features 64 new styles, including garden flamingos and sea horses for girls, and turtles and geckos for boys. From swimsuits to toweling dresses, you’ll find a variety of choices for kids up to age 14. Prices vary, snapperrock.com.
Source: BuzzFeed and Common Sense Media
Digitize Dad’s Golf Game Help dad digitize his golf experience with SensoGlove, a perfect Father’s Day present for golfing dads. SensoGlove provides an automatic and accurate pressure reading of a golfer’s grip to assist in producing a smoother and more powerful swing, which can result in greater distances and lower scores. When dad swings his golf club, SensoGlove provides real-time audio and visual feedback at 80 times per second to warn him if he exceeds his target level of grip pressure. Available in sizes small to extra-large; $89, sensoglove.com.
PA R E N T I N G T O O L B O X When time is precious, a box of activities that arrive in the mail for dad and the kids may be the perfect way to spend quality time together. Cooper Kits, designed for dads and kids ages 5-9, are available with different themes and come every three months packed with games, toys, a bedtime story, a themed dinner menu with recipes dad and the kids can make, related digital resources and an activity book. $59/year, cooperandkid.com.
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your style
The sun is shining and the seagulls are singing —
by Lauren Bell Isaacs
or maybe that’s just the sound of the kids running amok! Whether you’re headed to the beach on a family vacation or sitting pretty at the local pool, you’ll look coastal chic in this coral collection. 1.
2. 3.
4. 5.
7.
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1. Margaret Turner Shrimp Scarf, $64, margaretturnerdesigns.com
2. Bright Peach Boho Tassel Necklace, $30, furbish.com
3. Tango Shorty Tassel Necklace, $30, furbish.com 4. Marigold Montauk Cover Up, $78, serenaandlily.com 5. Coral Turkish Towel, $38, furbish.com 6. Azalea Pacific Tote, $148, serenaandlily.com 7. Limeade Mai Tai iPad Smart Cover, $48, lillypulitzer.com
Lauren Bell Isaacs is the digital media specialist for Carolina Parent. carolinaparent.com | JUNE 2014
17
growing up by Malia Jacobson
Discipline Without DRAMA
H
ave a hitting toddler, mouthy grade-schooler or defiant teen? Time for some loving discipline. But take note: Modern kids require a new brand of
parental guidance. “Unlike previous generations, children today live in a much more egalitarian world,” says Robert Ryan, a licensed counselor in Chicago. No longer viewed as underlings to be seen and not heard, today’s children resist overly harsh punitive measures. In fact, these tactics can backfire and actually reinforce misbehavior.
So what’s a parent to do? Let’s explore age-by-age discipline strategies that build self-worth, squelch power struggles, foster thriving relationships and put an end to endless yelling.
Time In AGES
0-4
Parents of young children can find themselves dishing up “timeouts” left and right. A discipline strategy dating back to the 1950s, timeouts entail removing a child from the scene of his misdeed for a period of time. It’s one of the most widespread discipline tactics around. But does it work? Often, timeouts are less than effective, says Stephanie T. Jones, a parenting coach with Possibility Parenting and chair of the North Carolina Parenting Education Network. That’s because parents aren’t consistent about what behavior will result in a timeout, and many only use it when they are angry. While a timeout may give parents a brief break from an unruly tot, it does little to address the underlying cause of the misbehavior. A more effective strategy: look for the root cause of the behavior you’re trying to correct (often, exasperating behaviors are ploys for attention or control), then employ logical consequences, like taking a child home if he can’t behave appropriately at the store or park. Malia Jacobson is a nationally published health journalist and mom of three.
18
JUNE 2014 |
carolinaparent.com
AGES 5-12
Strength Training
During the elementary years, misbehavior becomes more pronounced and harder to ignore. It’s no longer “cute” when your 7-yearold gets sassy. But reacting with harsh punishments can leave parents locked in a battle of wills that hurts the parentchild bond and fails to correct the misbehavior. Escaping this damaging downward spiral requires a fresh look at discipline, Jones says. “Many think of discipline in terms of punishment, but I think of it in terms of teaching, leading and guiding,” she says. “And learning is best accomplished in the context of meaningful relationships.” Developing a strong bond increases cooperation and reduces defiance and the need for punishment. Children who feel connected to the adults in their lives are more likely to comply with their requests and are generally eager to please them, notes Jones. Invest in mutually satisfying relationships with grade-schoolers by spending enjoyable time together that is free of distracting screens, work email and wireless devices. Try hiking, touch football, fishing, cooking together, family game nights and movie outings.
Ground Game AGES Think twice before yelling
13-18
“You’re grounded!” This “big kid” form of timeout provides a Band-Aid fix, not a long-term solution, Ryan says. A grounded teen who sits around stewing probably isn’t learning the intended lesson, he notes. That doesn’t mean teens shouldn’t experience consequences for their actions. Consequences should be tailored to the behavior parents want to correct, Jones says. Natural consequences and logical consequences foster learning and build life skills. “Natural consequences are those things that will happen without any intervention. Logical consequences are those things related to the misbehavior that parents do to help a child learn.” A natural consequence of forgetting homework is no credit. A logical consequence of neglecting to empty the dishwasher might be after-dinner dish duty for a week. Above all, parents need to establish a relationship of trust and respect with their teens, Ryan says. Laying down ironclad rules without explanation is a surefire way to spark dissent. “Teens react positively to respect more than almost any other style of engagement,” she says.
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5/19/14 5:41:56 PM
tech talk by Carolyn Jabs
REX
Lock Up Your Family’s Online Assets by Carolyn Jabs
When it comes to compassionate, quality care, we’re all ears (noses and throats, too).
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Padlocks for bicycles. Check.
Secure passwords for online assets. Uh-oh.
Dr. John Garside and the experienced care team at Rex Ear, Nose & Throat Specialists have been caring for children and adults in the Cary community for over aMIZ[ .ZWU [XMISQVO LQNÅ K]T\QM[ \W KPZWVQK MIZ infections and everything in between, we are here for you and your entire family. To refer a patient or schedule an appointment, call (919) 784-7400. Visit us online at rexearnosethroat.com
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Now that families conduct so much of their social and financial business online, strong passwords are every bit as important as sturdy locks on the doors of your home. Unfortunately, parents who are very conscientious about other forms of family security often do the virtual equivalent of leaving the key under the doormat. The recent security scare called Heartbleed should have been a wake-up call. If you haven’t already changed passwords for your online accounts, now is the time. And while you’re at it, teach your kids to create smart passwords, too. (A curriculum for doing that is available from Common Sense Media at commonsensemedia.org/educators/lesson/strong-passwords-3-5). The simplest way to manage passwords is to store them all in a vault-like piece of software that will generate, encrypt and remember highly secure passwords on your behalf. Free and reliable programs are available from LastPass, KeePass and Norton Identity Safe. Just be sure the program you choose allows easy access on all devices you use. Unfortunately, setting up password software requires time that busy parents may not have. Also, the password that gets you into the software becomes the equivalent of the one ring
carolinaparent.com 4/17/14 10:24:17 AM
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that binds them all, so if you forget it you are doomed. Watch our our Pre-K Pre-K students students Those who decide to forgo software need to get serious Watch sending tweets of their their about creating tough passwords. The first rule is to avoid sending tweets of work to parents and work to parents and weaknesses that create openings for trolls, bullies, hackers and friends from from their their own friends identity thieves. Here are three things to keep in mind: Our children had fun with their friends in own Beijing. mini-iPad! mini-iPad! n Don’t use personal information. Professional hackers Experience an international preschool. Spanish & Chinese • Reading, Math&&Writing Writing••Art, Art,Music, Music,Science Science know that it’s easier to remember details from your own Spanish & Chinese • Reading, Math Half Day Preschool for ages 2 to 5! life, so if you become a target the first passwords they’ll try SmartBoards Boardsand andiPads iPads••Yoga Yoga••International InternationalAssessments Assessments Smart Full Day option available with a special program at Jasper’s Place are names of people and places that are meaningful to you. FullDay: Day: Cooking, Cooking,Soccer Soccer&&Gardening GardeningatatJasper’s Jasper’s Full Google yourself. Anything that comes up won’t be a good ourschool Pre-K students Tournow nowto toregister registerfor forthe theWatch 2014-15 year Tour 2014-15 school year password. Next, review your social media profiles. Don’t use sending tweets of their International Preschool Preschool of of Raleigh Raleigh anything that has ever been listed as a favorite. International work to parents and 2730 Godley Lane, Raleigh, NC 27617 n Avoid recognizable words. Many programs have been 2730 Godley Lane, Raleigh, NCfriends 27617 from their own (Brier Creek next to Frankie’s) (Brier Creek next to Frankie’s) designed to crack passwords and most start with a dictionmini-iPad! 919-957-7249 ipraleigh.com ipraleigh.com ary of words in English and other languages. Using any 919-957-7249 Spanish & Chinese • Reading, Math & Writing • Art, Music, Science recognizable word, including proper nouns, makes you more Smart Boards and iPads • Yoga • International Assessments vulnerable. Adding an unexpected capital letter, a random CARPM_140500_IntPreschoolRaleigh.indd 1 Full Day: Cooking, Soccer & Gardening at Jasper’s5/19/14 11:20:02 AM number or an exclamation point makes the password a bit stronger but not much. Tour now to register for the 2014-15 school year n Don’t be cute — or lazy. Despite years of warnings, people International Preschool of Raleigh still use “default” passwords like “guest” and “password” as 2730 Godley Lane, Raleigh, NC 27617 well as sequences of keys on the keyboard such as “890(Brier Creek next to Frankie’s) =\ “or “qwert.” Hackers are also acquainted with obvious 919-957-7249 ipraleigh.com substitutions like “&” for “E” or “@” for “A.” And it’s not especially clever to use well-known number sequences like Pi or the Fibonnaci series. Eventually everyone forgets a password, so be sure your recovery systems are up-to-date. Many websites send a prompt or reset option to an email address. If you change your email address, update the sites that require passwords. Providing a cellphone number also adds a layer of security, especially if you have a cellphone that can be locked if it’s lost. Once you’ve found what seems like a great password, don’t be tempted to use it often and keep it forever. Experts recommend using different passwords, especially for sites involving financial information. And put a “Change passwords” reminder on your calendar so you do it at least as often as you change the oil in the car. Many security experts argue that passwords are obsolete. Perhaps, by the time your kids are adults, they may be able to protect their online assets with a fingerprint or DNA scan. In the meantime, however, mastering the art of creating strong passwords is just one more way you can have the peace of mind that comes from knowing you’ve protected all that is precious to your family. Carolyn Jabs raised three computer savvy kids including one with special needs.
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4/16/14 3:51:55 PM
understanding kids by Lucy Daniels Center staff
Understanding a Child’s Capacity to Be Bored and Alone
“I
By Lucy Daniels Center Staff
’m bored!” What parent hasn’t heard this complaint from their child? Why do some children feel bored when they
are surrounded by toys while others entertain themselves using imagination alone? How should parents respond to complaints of boredom? To answer these questions, it’s important to understand boredom as, in part, a reaction to uncomfortable emotional states.
What Does “I’m bored” Mean to a Child? Let’s first consider what is probably not boring to a young child: snuggles with Mommy or Daddy, family game night and an afternoon with friends at the playground. Children rarely — if ever — complain that activities involving companionship are boring. The common theme in these experiences is that children are connected and engaged in some way with others, so they do not have to be alone with their thoughts. Worries and uncomfortable feelings tend to feel less uncomfortable — or are not felt at all — in the company and with the distraction of supportive people.
In Which Situations Do Some Children Feel Bored? Children might dub tasks boring if they involve taking responsibility and ownership over one’s autonomy (playing or doing schoolwork independently, cleaning up or getting ready for bed), and times when he or she has to be alone. If a child is upset or worried for other reasons and is then asked to embark on a task independently, being alone becomes a bigger challenge because the task is no longer just the task: it is the task plus the accompanying uncomfortable feelings. Children tend to feel less comfortable when they are on their own or alone with their thoughts when they are angry, sad, upset or worried.
Boredom is a State of Mind Considering that boredom is about not wanting to be alone with one’s thoughts, we begin to see that a complaint about being bored is more likely a complaint about one’s feelings rather than the external components involved. Therefore, “I’m bored” can be understood as meaning,
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“I don’t like being alone,” or “I’m uncomfortable with how I’m feeling and nothing feels good enough, so being with you or doing something exciting that will pull me outside of myself seems to be the best solution right now.” When boredom is understood as a reaction to feelings, we can focus on it as an internal rather than external problem. The best kind of help for an internal problem seeks explanation and deepens understanding of how emotions affect overall capacities and behaviors.
Outside Fixes Vs. Inside Help Outside fixes are short-term changes made to the environment that temporarily cover or distract from an internal discomfort. Watching TV or playing a video game can be quite effective in the moment but do very little, if anything, to address or help the inside problem or original cause of the discomfort. These activities solve the immediate issue but do not help a child grow from the inside. Since 4-year-old Alice’s little brother was born, she describes just about everything as boring. Before her brother’s arrival, Alice frequently played with her dolls and only occasionally checked in with her mother. Now, Alice follows her mother around as she tends to the new baby and says her dolls (and all of her mother’s suggestions) are boring. Nothing satisfies Alice unless she has her mother’s undivided attention. Alice’s mother has two options: Address the problem on the outside (offer suggestions, distractions and encouragement to find something to do the way she used to) or invite Alice to think about what is different on the inside. By saying something such as, “Playing with your dolls doesn’t seem to feel good enough since Baby was born. I know things feel different now and being with me is helping you with that,” Alice’s mother will help her daughter understand that her boredom is a result of an internal discomfort rather than environmental problem. The Lucy Daniels Center is a nonprofit agency in Cary that promotes the emotional health and well-being of children and families. Visit lucydanielscenter.org to learn more.
Sesame Street® and associated characters, trademarks and design elements are owned and licensed by Sesame Workshop. © 2014 Sesame Workshop. All Rights Reserved. © 2014 SeaWorld Parks & Entertainment, Inc. All Rights Reserved.
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healthy families compiled by Katherine Kopp
BUG SAFETY TIPS for Summer
It’s Blueberry Time:
For Good Health and Good Memory
The compounds that color blueberries and other fruits and vegetables are called flavonoids, which have been found to have many health benefits. In particular, flavonoids have antioxidant and anti-inflammatory properties. Antioxidants neutralize free radicals, which are unstable molecules that can cause tissue destruction. While our bodies are equipped to handle small quantities of free radicals, environmental agents, such as cigarette smoke, radiation and pollution, are sources of additional free radicals. When the body’s natural defenses are exhausted, the unstable molecules become destructive. The damage accumulates with age and has been implicated in diseases ranging from Alzheimer’s disease to cancer. Antioxidants help defuse free radicals, transforming them into inert stable compounds, which are harmless. A study reported in the Annals of Neurology measured changes in cognitive function in over 16,000 participants who were at least 70 years old. After controlling for possible variables, they found that berry intake delayed cognitive aging by up to 2½ years. Blueberries are also a valuable source of vitamins. One cup supplies 14 milligrams of vitamin C, almost 25 percent of the daily requirement. Blueberries are also high in fiber, which helps one feel full longer and also promotes balanced cholesterol and heart health.
It’s summer and the bugs are out! Here are some suggestions from the American Academy of Pediatrics to help make your summer bug-free. n Don’t use scented soaps, perfumes or hair sprays on your child. n Avoid areas where insects nest or congregate, such as stagnant pools of water, uncovered foods and profusely blooming flowers. n Avoid dressing your child in bright colors or flowery prints that may attract insects. n Avoid combination sunscreen/insect repellent products because sunscreen needs to be reapplied every two hours, but insect repellent should not be reapplied. n Use insect repellants containing DEET to prevent insect-related diseases, such as Lyme Disease, Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever and West Nile Virus.
The current American Academy of Pediatrics and Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recommendations for children older than 2 months of age is to use 10-30 percent DEET. DEET should not be used on children younger than 2 months of age. The concentration of DEET varies significantly from product to product, so read the label of any product you purchase. Children should wash off repellents when they return indoors. As an alternative to DEET, picaridin has become available in the U.S. in concentrations of 5-10 percent.
Celebrate National Men’s Health Week Keep the health of the men in your life in mind this month. National Men’s Health Week is celebrated each year the week leading up to and including Father’s Day, which this year is June 9-15. It’s a good time to heighten awareness of preventable health problems and encourage early detection and treatment of disease among men and boys. Find suggestions from the CDC for ways men can stay healthy at cdc.gov/men/index.htm.
35%
Percentage of Americans between the ages of 18-34 who have enrolled in the Affordable Care Act. Source: Congressional Budget Office
Katherine Kopp is a freelance writer and editor in Chapel Hill. carolinaparent.com | JUNE 2014
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4/17/14 9:26:38 AM
BRAGGING: Arrogance or Virtue?
What Other Parents — and Your Kids — Think of Your Boasts
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By Odile Fredericks
bragging has gone viral. The brag floats through virtual space, often
Whatever the motivation, nobody likes a braggart, and a brag can spin out of control, damaging the emotions of the child being bragged on, her siblings and her parents’ friends.
wreaking havoc on relationships while netting Facebook “likes” and
When Bragging Goes Bad
Twitter “favorites.” Is there any good way to brag? When is it over
When you brag, other parents tend to find it annoying and frustrating, says Dr. Eli Jerchower, a licensed psychologist with Silber Psychological Services in Raleigh and Cary. “Inherently, (bragging) hits back to our own insecurities and makes another parent feel bad about what another parent is not doing or what their child hasn’t done,” he says, offering examples. “‘I haven’t enrolled my child in piano lessons at age 5,’ or ‘he’s not learning Chinese.’” Brags about accomplishments that most parents struggle with, such as toilet training their kids or getting them to sleep through the night, are particularly irritating, Jerchower says. A certain level of pride in your child or his or her accomplishments is healthy. However, he says that today’s culture of extracurricular activities that have caused kids to become more competitive at a younger age is driving bragging. “Activities have gotten more structured,’ he says. “You’re not just playing soccer in the neighborhood after school. You’re on a team, you’re competing against other kids, they’re keeping score. So, there are all these benchmarks now as to what level your child is on. …
s long as there have been kids, there have been parents bragging about them. But with the explosion of social media,
the top? And how do parents — and their kids — deal with it?
“We can easily post a quick tweet or a Facebook message or snap a picture and put it on Instagram,” says Nichole Huff, an assistant professor and extension specialist in N.C. State’s Department of Youth, Family and Community Sciences. “I think that is fueling the tendency to brag. I don’t know that parents are actually realizing that they are bragging. We can get caught up in the social media mayhem. ‘This is what my child is doing. Look at my child.’” Huff, who has a 6- and a 4-year-old, says bragging often comes from a good place, with parents genuinely excited and proud, but sometimes it can be fueled by insecurity. After all, good parenting is a difficult path to forge, and one where success is hard to measure. “I think that sometimes we brag because it’s our way of saying, ‘Hey, I must be doing this right if my child is succeeding,’” she says. “So sometimes, we can judge our parenting prowess as the result of what our children are doing correctly.”
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Bragging
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There is a lot more of that going on, so it helps create these goals that weren’t necessarily there 20 years ago, and it has come down to a much earlier age, even piano competitions, art competitions.” Bragging can cause sibling rivalry, as well as stress in the child being bragged about to keep up with unrealistic expectations, Jerchower says. It never hurts for a child to hear something positive, but if he or she keeps hearing a parent talk about an accomplishment in one particular area, it sets him or her up to think that’s the level of success that must be achieved. Some children even develop a fear of failing. “It’s important to be aware of what your children are hearing you say about them and focus on the effort and process, and not just about the outcome,” Jerchower says. “When we think about bragging, it tends to be a lot about the outcome, and that’s where parents run into trouble, developing false expectations about what it means to be good and what it means to be valued.” Both Jerchower and Huff say that before you share your child’s accomplishments, consider the audience — and avoid posting the news on social media. A Facebook post goes out to everyone, setting the stage for competitiveness among parents and friends who may feel compelled to keep up, whereas communication that reaches only close family members sends the news to those who care most.
Facing a Braggart So how should you respond to a braggart? The answer is simple, according to experts: disengage. “Parents should just remind themselves not to get caught up in the keeping up,” Huff says. “I think that parents should resist that temptation to engage in this bragging competition. They should be cordial, be polite, but not really fuel the conversation. Say, ‘That’s great! Good for little Johnny!’ And if the parent is bragging on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram, then that is easy to ignore or hide and unfriend if it’s bothering (you).” A point to consider is that kids often learn by imitation. If we are parents who brag, we are going to be raising children who brag, Huff says. “It’s OK to raise children who are proud of themselves, but we want them to also be modest and to be humble.” Cindy Cottle, a clinical and forensic psychologist in Raleigh, says she tries to teach her 9-year-old the finer points of communicating. “I’ve taught my son that it is impolite to brag, and that there is a fine line between being proud and demonstrating pride versus bragging,” she says. Her son’s teachers taught him early
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Cindy Cottle hung her running medals on her front door. Photo courtesy of Cindy Cottle
on to look for connections when he meets people instead of talking about himself. “Finding the connections and sharing in the joy of the accomplishment of the other people is a skill that has to be almost proactively taught by your parents and your teachers,” she says. Cottle agrees that social media offers an easy place to brag, but there’s something to be said for being proud of one’s own hard-earned accomplishments. After starting to run three years ago to lose weight after the birth of her second son, Cottle worked her way up from running 1 mile to running marathons, garnering a slew of medals. At age 40, she thought her medals deserved to see the light of day, so she hung them on a wreath on her front door. She knew she’d never win a marathon, but she was proud of having finished the races. That’s when her son asked her a hard question. “About a year ago, my son looked at the wreath,” she recalls with amusement. “‘Mom,’ he said, ‘isn’t that bragging to have that on our front door all year?’” Sometimes kids figure things out faster than their parents. Odile Fredericks is the web editor of Carolina Parent.
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PA RT 3
Trials, Triumphs and Takeaways By Kurt Dusterberg
C
“For her it was a huge challenge. It was something she really didn’t want to do, but we finished it together.”
arolina Parent’s Fit Family Challenge may be winding down, but the lifestyle changes and healthy habits participating
families have formed and strengthened over the last two months can live on forever. Here’s a recap of the trials and triumphs our spotlight families will take away from their eight-week journey toward better health.
THE ARMSTRONGS This family of five faces a unique set of challenges. Mom Kim wants to make sure her three home-schooled children are getting enough physical activity. Making sure everyone eats a healthy diet is also difficult. All three kids have different eating profiles, as they are at different stages developmentally. Kim and her husband, David, want to create better habits for themselves, too, so they can set a good example for George (14), William (12) and Naomi (10). Before the Fit Family Challenge began, the Armstrongs made a commitment to cut down on going to restaurants, which gave them a good head start. n
What Were Their Biggest Challenges?
While the Armstrongs stuck to their plan of eating out just once a month, that put more focus on meal prep. “Just making a point to plan ahead for meals, to have things prepared and ready (could be difficult),” Kim says. “We need to plan on the weekends what we’re going to do during the week.” Introducing healthy snacks, like fruits and vegetables, took priority. George bought into the dietary changes, but Naomi had a harder time accepting them. “Our daughter did not like it much at all,” Kim says.
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n
Where Did They Find Success?
The Armstrongs have always been active and make outdoor time a priority every day. “What came easy was increasing the physical activity,” Kim says. “David already enjoyed running and the kids already had time outside, so increasing that wasn’t too difficult.” The kids needed more encouragement when it came to structured exercise. Their trainer, Ryan Fahey, a member of the Certified Personal Trainers Network of Canada and a canfitpro personal training specialist and fitness instructor, suggested particular exercises to increase their activity level. “Some of the exercises Ryan gave to us were a bit of a challenge just because the kids weren’t used to doing 10 reps of this or that,” Kim says. But in the end, getting more exercise wasn’t so tough. “We visited different parks and tried to venture out of our comfort zone, things that were a little different instead of just taking a walk every day,” Kim says. “They would usually bike three days a week, but instead of just doing that, George started playing more basketball. We incorporated going to the park and playing tennis, getting out on the walking trails.” n
Can They Keep It Going?
“I think we can with a lot of it,” Kim says. “We’re already trying to retrain the kids to some degree as far as how they think about food. William is still a bit resistant, which I’m not surprised about because he’s stuck on what he likes — or
what he doesn’t like. But we will try to continue to incorporate all the aspects we have already.” Best of all, the Armstrongs are seeing results. Not only is George playing in pick-up basketball games, but he recently grabbed a snack of carrots and water without any prompting. As of mid-May, David had lost 30 pounds dating back to February and 15 pounds since the challenge started in April. Kim had dropped 10 pounds since February and 5 pounds since the challenge started. n
What Did They Learn?
“You have to decide whether to do it wholeheartedly and accomplish what you set out to do, or you don’t really get into it and you’re kind of lackadaisical and you do it halfway,” Kim says. “If you see it through, you will see where you’ve come from.”
THE HUDSONS Robin Hudson is a single mom and full-time graduate student. As the years have passed, she and her 13-year-old daughter, Nadia, have fallen into some bad habits. Hudson exercised on and off through the years, but a busy lifestyle crowded out her intentions to stay active. As she tried to keep up with Nadia’s dancing and school activities, she relied too often on fast food and sugary drinks and snacks. n
What Were Their Biggest Challenges?
“It hasn’t been easy,” Robin says. “The hard part has been eliminating the sugar drinks. But we’ve replaced those and juices with water and Gatorade. It just makes sense to have water in the house all the time. That doesn’t mean that every now and then we might not grab a soft drink when we eat out. But both of us have really increased the water.” Hudson’s schedule changed recently after picking up some shifts as a bartender. At first, that interfered with exercising, but she tackled the issue quickly. “I learned that if I schedule my running dates with a partner, I keep my commitments better,” she says. n
Where Did They Find Success?
“We’ve replaced a lot of foods that aren’t so good for us,” Robin says. “We eat lots of fruit and raw vegetables throughout the day. Nadia actually takes those in her lunches. She will use whole-wheat tortillas to make turkey wraps.” Hudson is walking between 40 minutes and an hour each day, with a little jogging mixed in. “Nadia and I really enjoy walking together and we’re looking to find some bikes here before long,” she says.
The Hudsons (top two photos) and the Armstrongs (bottom two photos) got down and dirty during the Big Muddy Challenge in Youngsville on April 26. Photo courtesy of Melissa Hayes Photography
continued on page 32 carolinaparent.com | JUNE 2014
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Can They Keep It Going?
There is no wavering here. The Hudsons already feel like a success story. “I don’t think we could go back to the way we were,” Robin says. When they rarely visit a fast-food restaurant, they make smart choices. “At Chick-fil-A, you can ask for a multi-grain bun — and we don’t order fries,” she says. “We carry water everywhere we go, so we’re saving money, too.” When it comes to maintaining the lifestyle, Robin is resolved. “I’ve started and stopped so many times before,” she says. “I just want to make permanent life changes.”
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“Now that I’ve made it a habit, I can see that exercise is a way to alleviate stress,” she says. “Walking is just good for 11:22:02 AM me. It’s become a necessity.”
Researchers at UNC Chapel Hill are seeking volunteers for a study of Postpartum Depression.
We need . . . 4 Healthy mothers 4 12-24 months past most recent childbirth 4 NOT currently depressed 4 Who fall into the following category: Have experienced depression in the past, but not after childbirth
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Racing Toward
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By Robyn Kinsey Mooring Heather Schleupner, Bella Church and Garry Church cross the finish line in a race they recently ran in together. Photo courtesy of Race 13.1
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re you tired of your family leading a sedentary lifestyle? Do you want to do more than just watch as your child is the only one who gets to participate in a sport? If your answer to either question is yes, you may want to consider picking up the pace by running together.
A Family Sport Cool Kids Run! coach Julie Shea Sutton of Raleigh says more families are choosing to run because of how accessible it is. It doesn’t take a special place to practice and doesn’t require a lot of expensive equipment. Michelle Townsend, race director for High Point-based Go Far, a fitness program, agrees that running is an ideal activity for families to do together because there is a distance to suit everyone. It also promotes healthy eating and an active lifestyle. Townsend is a former runner who returned to the sport when her twin boys started participating in Go Far.
“Staying active is now a family thing, and running is the basis for that,” she says. While the kids in Shea’s program are training, many parents run their own route. One group is even training for a half-marathon. Sonja Lombard of Raleigh says her family has adopted more healthy eating habits and running has helped to improve the quality of the time they spend together. “The fact that my husband now runs with us sets an example,” she says. “My children love that he is doing this with us.” Shea has seen running affect the dynamics of families in other ways as well. There is an earned mutual respect on the part of both parents and kids. “They are attempting to do the same things, so there is more of an understanding of what everyone is trying to accomplish individually.” Sloan Nuernberger is a Durham mom of three boys. She is a distance runner and the rest of her family stays active with continued on page 35 carolinaparent.com | JUNE 2014
33
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running, tennis or soccer. Both she and her husband place a priority on exercise, which she hopes will teach her boys to do the same. “What I hope is that they’re picking up on the benefits it brings us, and that they realize we’re making a choice to not be sedentary,” she says.
Setting Goals
walk the 5k or run the half, there is something for everyone.”
Other Ways to Participate There are also plenty of ways members of the family who don’t run can still be part of the action. To keep it interesting for everyone, choose a different trail or route and let anyone who isn’t running take along a bike or scooter. They can get their exercise in as well, then the whole family can enjoy a picnic, take a boat ride or simply go for a hike. Whatever your family’s fitness level, running offers something for everyone. To find out more about how to get started, contact your local running store, Go Far at gofarclub.org or Cool Kids Run! at coolkidsrun.com. For a complete list of races that will be held in North Carolina throughout the year, go to runningintheusa.com/ race/default.aspx and click on North Carolina.
As with learning to do anything new or taking any skill to the next level, setting goals for running is good for family members of all ages and abilities. For parents and children alike who are just starting out, a 1-mile or 5k race is always a good place to start. Beyond that, parents who have been running for a while may want to take on a half-marathon as a challenging but attainable goal. For older kids, running a 5k or 10k is a reasonable objective, and for younger Robyn Kinsey Mooring is a Durham-based writer and mother carolinaparent.com children, running a mile or a 5k is certainly a noteworthy of two boys. accomplishment. This It’s important that family members verbalize theseproof goals so shows how your ad will appear in our MARCH 2014 issue. HOW KIDS they can support and encourage each other. Shea says that’s one please To our valued client, review your ad and respond with any changes or approval. If we naparent.com in 48 hours, we willSPECTATORS run your ad as it appears here. Thank you. BE GOOD of the best things about families running different distances in youCAN Note: ad proofs may your not represent actual This proof shows how your ad will appear in our FEBRUARY 2014 issue. n Make a poster or sign to support runner. (Race 13.1 size the same events. features a KidZone where children can make these before always see parents their children onany when it AS ISor approval. U APPROVED U APPROVED CORRECTIONS NOTEDor U SUBMIT NEW P ur valued client,“You please review your cheering ad and respond with changes If we doWITH not hear from during the race.) comesyou to sports,” Shea says. good see the roles reversed, in 48 hours, we“It’s will runto your as it appears here. Thank you. You canadalso reach our carolinaparent.com readers! Call your media consultant to discuss benefits o where children cheer their on as well.” Note:parents ad proofs may not represent actual size Help scout out locations throughout the course where you and nearby events that offer multiple NOTED n❒ ❒ APPROVEDSome AS ISof the local ❒ APPROVED WITH CORRECTIONS SUBMIT NEW PROOF ________________________________________________ ____________________ can see your runner and they can hopefully hear you. distances such as a half-marathon, 5k and 10k races include Signature Date n also reach our carolinaparent.com readers! Call your media consultant to discuss benefits of online advertising. the Cannonball Run Half Marathon and 5k in Greensboro; the n Cheer loudly at the finish line! Be ready to treat your runner Greensboro Marathon, Half Marathon and 5k; the Raleigh City like the champion he or she is. ___________________________________________ of Oaks Marathon; the Raleigh Rocks Half Marathon and 10k;________________________________ ure and the new Race 13.1 Half Marathon, 5k and 10k in Greens- Date n Have a bottle of water or Gatorade ready for your runner at boro, Raleigh and Winston-Salem. the finish line. Post-race snacks will be available, but there’s “Our races give families the opportunity to set goals together nothing like getting that much-needed first drink from the that are realistic for each family member,” says Charlie Mercer, presones you love. ident and chief operating officer of Race 13.1. “Whether you want to
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5 Things Moms Can Learn By Jill C. Moffett
1. Make connections.
is full of kids. Toddlers whoosh down the slide. Parents rock babies in their arms. It’s the usual routine, except for one thing: Each parent is a man attending a Triangle Stay At Home Dads playgroup. This 200-member organization gathers regularly to socialize and share child-minding responsibilities. “It’s awesome,” says Austin Dowd, organizer of the group. The other dads agree. What’s more, they have a few tips for moms. Here are five things moms can learn from stay-athome dads.
Because at-home dads are in the minority, it can be alienating. “It’s important to have other dads to connect with so you know you’re not alone,” says James Kline of Apex, another group organizer and an at-home dad of two. This is true for moms, too. Whether it’s a weekly playgroup at the library or an informal get together with other moms, finding a community of families to talk to and swap child care with can help make the job easier and more enjoyable.
It’s a sunny afternoon and the park
Chris Bradley takes a walk in the woods with his daughter, Holland, 1.
2. Fix things with duct tape.
Lunchbots or Ziplocks? Snugglis or Ergos? Amber beads or teething rings? The sheer volume of baby and toddler gear on the market is overwhelming. While the right stuff makes the job easier, it also makes it unnecessarily expensive and burdensome. Stay-at-home dads don’t worry about stuff like that. “I think dads are less inclined than moms to do what everyone else is doing,” Kline says. “The moms in my neighborhood are more likely to buy the latest gadget for their kids, but we just fix up the old stroller with duct tape.”
Emory, 4, and Benjamin, 5, ride the train at Pullen Park with their dads and friends. All photos courtesy of Crafted Focus Photography, LLC.
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Tyler, 3, enjoys a day out at the North Carolina Museum of Art’s outdoor park in Raleigh.
From Stay-At-Home Dads DADS
3. Don’t go it alone. It can be hard to co-parent, especially if one parent works and the other stays home. “At first, I’d hear my wife talk about the kids and what they needed and for a while I felt like: ‘I can figure this out on my own!’” says Scott Benner, an at-home dad of two and author of Life is Short, Laundry is Eternal, published last April. “At first it was a bit combative. Then I realized that I needed to include her, so I’ve tried really hard to make sure I incorporate her ideas into what I’m doing with the kids.” It’s good advice for moms, too, who may think they are supposed to have all the answers. Remember, everyone is figuring out this parenting thing as they go along.
4. Forge your own path. In an era of Pinterest and endless streams of parenting advice, don’t get overwhelmed by directives such as, “Is your child overprotected?” “Does he get enough outside time?” “Should I limit her screen time?” “One thing I learned early on is that I just had to do this in a way that suited me,” Dowd says. “At first I was concerned that there was one right way, but once I let go of that, it became so much easier.” The same holds true for moms. Whether you work a high-powered job or are raising the kids at home, let go of expectations and don’t be afraid to forge your own path, tailored to your family’s unique quirks and demands.
HOLD DOWN THE FORT According to the National At-Home Dad Network, there are at least 1.4 million at-home dads in the U.S. today, and more than 70 percent of dads who stay at home with their kids do so by choice, not because of a job loss. If you’re a dad who stays home with your kids, there are more resources available to you than ever before, such as: n Triangle Stay At Home Dads.
The group has up to 20 members per event and attracts dads from all over the Triangle area. Learn more at
meetup.com/triangle-stay-at-homedads.
Austin Dowd with son, Emory, and Sandy Rose with son, Ryan, walk through a Triangle corn maze.
n Life is Short, Laundry is Eternal. In
5. Take a gender-neutral
his journey as an at-home dad of two,
this book, Scott Benner writes about
approach.
one of whom has Type 1 diabetes. He
Sure, men still tend to mow the lawn and fix things around the house, but at-home dads can also soothe crying infants and make dinner. Likewise, Mom can throw a ball with her kids or teach them how to build a treehouse. “This experience has really taught me that the reactions you have to your kids are based in your responsibilities, not your gender,” Benner says.
blogs at scottbenner.com/blog. n Dad or Alive.
This blog is written by writer and stayat-home dad Adrian Kulp, who has worked for Adam Sandler and Chelsea Handler. He humorously chronicles what it’s like to be an at-home dad in his book, Dad or Alive, and on his blog by the same name: dadoralive.com. n National At-Home Dad Network.
Jill Moffett is a freelance writer and full-time mother in Durham. She blogs regularly at jillmoffett.com.
This organization offers resources, a blog and an annual conference. Learn more at athomedad.org. carolinaparent.com | JUNE 2014
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HOW TO BE A
Superdad By Patrick Hempfing
I
tude and I try to lead by example … I think I can, I think I can … Blah! That time I couldn’t. The plastic bag got a serious workout. those years, I’ve tried my best to be a “Superdad” for my I’d recommend to other seasick passengers that they double bag. daughter, Jessie. I’ve taught her to read and do math, and how Mattie took Jessie, who was 3 years old at the time, down to throw, kick, hit and catch all kinds of balls. I jogged behind her into the boat’s cabin so she wouldn’t watch me vomit. She told bicycle, hands outstretched to catch her in case she fell, until she me later that Jessie entertained herself by pretending to throw pedaled faster than I could run. I’ve rushed to the rescue when she up in an ice bucket. Children follow their parents’ lead. Jessie has taken many more boat rides since then, but not saw spiders or had bad dreams. I’ve played along with her games, with Daddy. Luckily, fathers don’t have to be Superdads all even though she makes up rules as she goes. And I’ve applauded the time. Grandfathers, uncles and brothers can be super, too. her imaginative shows in the living room, even when I would have Mothers, grandmothers, aunts, neighbors, teachers and friends rather taken a nap. also enrich our children’s lives. Father’s Day is a good time to express appreciation to the people who sometimes take on Although I strive to be Superdad, I know I’m not Superman. If father-like roles. I were Superman, though, the ocean would be my kryptonite Jessie, I’ll keep trying to be a Superdad with an “I can” and the garbage can my Lois Lane. I tend to get sick on boats. attitude. Although, by mutual agreement with Uncle Gary, I My wife, Mattie, and I went on a whale-watching excursion in won’t be sailing with you anymore. I can and will be there San Diego many years ago. On the choppy waters of the Pacific for you in other ways. I will encourage you to dream big and Ocean, Mattie and the other passengers saw whales. I spent the maximize your joy each day. I will hold you when you need to be whole trip hugging the garbage can. No one mistook me for comforted. There are many places that I can take you and things Superman that day. I can teach you. I can learn from you, too (like how to divide five A few years ago, when my garbage can romance in San Diego cherries on a dessert, three ways). I’ll be there to support you had faded to a distant memory, my brother-in-law, Gary, took as you chart your own path to discover and achieve your life’s our family out on his sailboat. Before we boarded, I slipped a purpose. Superman, I am not. Superdad? I’ll do my best! plastic bag into my pocket as a precautionary measure, but I Happy Father’s Day! I know that I’ll have a happy one … on didn’t think I would need it. After all, we were sailing on a river solid ground. on a calm day. Soon the wind picked up, though, and as the boat pitched back and forth, my motion sickness, and breakfast, Patrick Hempfing had a 20-year professional career in banking, reemerged. I tried to smile and crack jokes to let Jessie know that accounting, and auditing before he became a father at age 44. He I was okay. Mattie and I encourage Jessie to take an “I can” attiis now a full-time husband, stay-at-home dad and writer. ’ll soon be celebrating my seventh Father’s Day as a dad. During
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june our picks Photo courtesy of Christopher Duggan
American Dance Festival Presents Children’s Matinee Series June and July The American Dance Festival presents its Children’s Matinee Series in June and July. Ballet Hispanico melds Latin dance with classical and contemporary techniques June 21, Pilobolus entertains with jaw-dropping works June 28 and the Paul Taylor Dance Company delivers breathtaking choreography July 19. All shows begin at 1 p.m. and are followed by a free kids party with music, snacks and activities in the lobby. Tickets are $16 for each performance. americandancefestival.org.
7th
10th
DIY Fun Abounds at Maker Faire June 7
Enjoy hands-on activities at Maker Faire North Carolina June 7, 10 a.m.-6 p.m., at the N.C. State Fairgrounds’ Exposition Center in Raleigh. Meet inventors, engineers, hobbyists and artists who show what they have made and share what they have learned. View the art of woodturning and watch robots in action. Learn how to pick a lock, sew electronics or use a weaving loom. Visit makerfairenc.com for a complete list of exhibitors. $10 adults, $5 ages 4-12 and free for ages 3 and younger.
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Photo courtesy of Jonathan Danforth
Kids Crank Up the Power in “Kid Grid” June 7-8 Marbles’ hosts a two-day grand opening June 7 and 8, 9 a.m.-5 p.m., to showcase its newest exhibit, “Kid Grid,” which introduces children to the power grid, helps them make smart energy choices and inspires their interest in energy careers. The exhibit is located in a second-floor addition to Marbles that overlooks Moore Square in downtown Raleigh and is the first project to change the exterior of the museum building since it opened in 2007. $5 for ages 1 and older. marbleskidsmuseum.org/kidgrid. Rendering courtesy of Marbles Kids Museum
25th
Pet a Pony in Raleigh June 25 Learn about horse care and see a farrier (horseshoer) at work at Pet a Pony Day June 25, 9 a.m.-3 p.m., at the James B. Hunt Horse Complex in Raleigh. Enjoy horse show jumping with an inside look at how participants are judged. Youngsters from the North Carolina Hunter Jumper Association and the 4-H Pony Club serve as guides for the day. Admission and parking are free. nchja.com.
Photo courtesy of Summer Travis
Sleep Under the Stars June 28
28th
Unplug and head outside June 28 for the Great American Backyard Campout. The National Wildlife Federation’s annual event, held in conjunction with Great Outdoors Month, encourages people of all ages to camp in their backyards, neighborhoods, parks and campgrounds as a way to reconnect with nature. Visit backyardcampout.org for packing lists, recipes, nocturnal wildlife guides, exploration activities, nature games and more.
Photo courtesy of Kristy Myers
Celebrate History in Durham June 14 Modern art and music fuse with Durham’s historic roots at Bull Fest June 14, 10 a.m.-4 p.m., at Duke Homestead. The event hosts local artisans, live performances, 19th-century games, costumed interpreters and a country doctor display. Admission is free. dukehomestead. org/bull-fest.php. North Carolina’s copy of The 13th Amendment, which formally ended legal slavery in the U.S., will be on view June 14, 10 a.m.-5 p.m., at Historic Stagville in Durham. The fragile document will travel to six state historic sites June 5-21. Admission is free. ncdcr.gov/juneteenth. Juneteenth, an annual celebration marking the end of slavery, takes place June 21, 1-10 p.m., in downtown Durham. The event features live music, food and kids activities. Admission is free. spectacularmag.com.
14th Photo courtesy of North Carolina Department of Cultural Resources
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calendar
FATHER’S DAY Daddy Daughter Dance June 13 – Fathers and their daughters enjoy dancing, contests, photos and more. Register by June 1 at Knightdale Town Hall, 950 Steeple Square Ct., Knightdale. $25/couple, $5/additional child. 7-10 p.m. Knightdale Recreation Center, 102 Lawson Ridge Rd., Knightdale. 919-217-2232. knightdalenc.gov.
Saturday for Kids: Father’s Day Storytime June 14 – Meet author Joan Holub for a reading and signing of Mighty Dads and enjoy an activity. Free. 11 a.m. Barnes & Noble, 760 S.E. Maynard Rd., Cary. 919-467-3866. bn.com.
Superheroes and Superdads! June 14-15– Superheroes and their sidekicks show off their superpowers at Marbles’ Father’s Day celebration. Design a superhero cape and mask, craft your own comic adventure and experiment with the power of flight and invisibility using super-small science. $5 ages 1-11. 9 a.m.5 p.m. Marbles Kids Museum, 201 E. Hargett St., Raleigh. 919-834-4040. marbleskidsmuseum.org.
1 SUNDAY
Author Visits. June Reagan reads and signs her book How to Babysit a Grandma. Free. 3 p.m. Barnes & Noble, 760 S.E. Maynard Rd., Cary. 919-467-3866. bn.com. Pottery Workshop for Beginners. Learn basic hand-building techniques to create animal sculptures, bells and more. Ages 8 and older. Registration required. $20. 2-4 p.m. Art Adventure Studio, 107 Spring Hollow Ln., Cary. 919-233-1598. etsy.com/shop/ lynnesueart.
2 MONDAY
Butterflies and Moths. Join a park ranger for a movie and a short hike to learn how to identify butterflies and moths. Take binoculars. Registration required. Free. 1 p.m. William B. Umstead State Park, 8801 Glenwood Ave., Raleigh. 919-571-4170. ncparks.gov. Parent and Child Clay Workshop: Garden Mushrooms. Create something unique for a garden out of clay. Ages 2-12. Registration required. $15/child. 10-11:30 a.m. Durham Arts Council, Northgate Mall, 1058 W. Club Blvd., Durham. 919-560-2726. durhamarts.org. Tiny Tots: Colors in Nature. Sort natural objects found in the park and go on a nature hunt to find plants and animals of different colors. Ages 18 mos.-3 yrs. Registration required. $2/child. 10:30-11 a.m. Crowder District Park, 4709 Ten-Ten Rd., Apex. 919-662-2850. wakegov.com/parks/ crowder.
3 TUESDAY
Breastfeeding 101. Attend a seminar about breastfeeding, including what to expect, common concerns and support options. All ages. Registration required. Free. 6:30 p.m. Babies “R” Us, 201 Crossroads Blvd, Cary. 919859-1971. babiesrus.com.
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Nature Families: Ant Antics. Hunt for ants in the garden, play a game and enjoy a snack. All ages. Registration required. $5/family. 11 a.m.-noon. Crowder District Park, 4709 Ten-Ten Rd., Apex. 919-662-2850. wakegov. com/parks/crowder. Orienteering. Learn how to find your way using only a compass and map. Ages 6-12. Registration required. $8/child. 1-3 p.m. Lake Crabtree County Park, 1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville. 919-460-2723. wakegov. com/parks/lakecrabtree. Parent and Child Clay Workshop: Garden Mushrooms. See June 2. 4-5:30 p.m. Time for Tots: Skiffs, Sharpies and Sailing Ships. Discover different kinds of boats and make a sailing vessel to take home. Ages 3-5 with adult. Registration required. $1. 10-10:45 a.m. N.C. Museum of History, 5 E. Edenton St., Raleigh. 919807-7992. ncmuseumofhistory.org.
4 WEDNESDAY
Eco-Express: Wild Water Adventures. Take the fast track to nature in handson studies of nature and ecology. Ages 8-12. Registration required. $12 resident, $16 nonresident. 1-3 p.m. Stevens Nature Center/ Hemlock Bluffs, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 919-387-5980. townofcary.org. History Corner: Stagville in Black and White. Learn about people and places associated with Stagville State Historic Site in Durham. Ages 6-9 with adult. Registration required. $1. 10-11 a.m. N.C. Museum of History, 5 E. Edenton St., Raleigh. 919-8077992. ncmuseumofhistory.org. History Hunters: Stories in Black and White. Find out how photographer Brenda Scott discovered stories through her camera lens while putting together the exhibit “Stagville: Black and White.” Ages 10-13.
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Registration required. $1. 11:15 a.m.12:15 p.m. N.C. Museum of History, 5 E. Edenton St., Raleigh. 919-8077992. ncmuseumofhistory.org. Indoor Fairy Garden Workshop. Make a beach-themed miniature garden with indoor plants to adorn your home. Register online. Registration required. $25 adults, $10 child. 10 a.m. Atlantic Avenue Orchid and Garden, 5217 Atlantic Ave., Raleigh. 919-2398078. atlanticavenuegarden.com. Nature Friends: Ants in Action. Learn the jobs of ants in a colony. Discover the life cycle of an ant and the unique adaptations that help these tiny insects survive. Ages 6-9. $4/child. 11 a.m.-noon. Crowder District Park, 4709 Ten-Ten Rd., Apex. 919-6622850. wakegov.com/parks/crowder. Nature Stories: Turtle Tales. Learn about turtles. Register online. $4/child. 1-2 p.m. Blue Jay Point County Park, 3200 Pleasant Union Church Rd., Raleigh. 919-870-4330. wakegov.com/parks/bluejay. Nature Watchers: Amazing Ants. Learn the parts of an ant using play dough and create an “ant restaurant” to discover their favorite foods. Go on a hunt to look at them under a magnifying glass and make a craft. Ages 3-5. Registration required. $4/child. 1-2 p.m. Crowder District Park, 4709 Ten-Ten Rd., Apex. 919-662-2850. wakegov.com/parks/crowder. Storytime for Tots: What Joe Saw. Discover nature with a story, followed by hands-on nature exploration. Ages 2-5. Registration required. $4/child. 1-2 p.m. Lake Crabtree County Park, 1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville. 919-460-2723. wakegov.com/parks/ lakecrabtree.
5 THURSDAY
Curious Creatures: Learning about Lizards. Discover fascinating facts about wildlife through hikes, activities and crafts. Ages 5-8. Registration required. $12 resident,
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$16 nonresident. 10 a.m.-noon. Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 919-3875980. townofcary.org. Little Historians: Kids Can Do It! Experience 19th-century life through the eyes of a child. Enjoy stories, antebellum games and fun hands-on farm activities. Ages 5-7. Registration required. $4/child. 1-2 p.m. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 919-856-6675. wakegov.com/parks/yatesmill.
6 FRIDAY
American Girl Club. Enjoy a discussion of Kaya and activities. Free. 7 p.m. Barnes & Noble, 760 S.E. Maynard Rd., Cary. 919-467-3866. bn.com. “As Seen Through My Eyes” Photographic Exhibition and Reception. Enjoy photographic works by Rae, a local teenage photographer who won Best of Show in the youth division of the Raulston Arboretum Photography Contest. Children welcome. RSVP via Facebook. Free. 5:30-9 p.m. Elizabeth Galecke Photography Studio, 1113 Glen Eden Dr., Raleigh. facebook.com/ events/780334475312516. Do Your Dootie Cover That Booty Diaper Drive. Take a pack of unopened diapers to receive one free child admission at this event that celebrates the end of the traditional school year. Diapers benefit families in need. Free. 5-8 p.m. Monkey Joe’s, 6220 Glenwood Ave., Raleigh. raleighdiaperdrive.com/events. Glow in the Park Cary. Enjoy a party fun run featuring colorful glow products, foam pits, dance moves and more to benefit local nonprofits. All ages. Register online. $55 on event day. Reduced rates for early registration. Run begins at 8:45 p.m. WakeMed Soccer Park, 201 Soccer Park Dr., Cary. 313-304-0903. glowintheparkrun. com/locations2014/cary.html.
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Kids Fun-Days: Stream Fun. Children hike, make projects and engage in nature activities. Ages 5-8. Registration required. $12 resident, $16 nonresident. 10 a.m.-noon. Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 919-387-5980. townofcary.org. Night Out in Nature. Kids spend a night out in nature making memories and new friends in an old-fashioned, camp-style program. Ages 8-12. Registration required. $19 residents, $24 nonresidents. 6-9 p.m. Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 919-387-5980. townofcary.org. Project Dance With American Dance Festival. Enjoy an African dance and drumming workshop with special guests from the American Dance Festival. Move to African beats and learn about the instruments involved. $5 ages 1 and older. 5:30-6:30 p.m. Marbles Kids Museum, 201 E. Hargett St., Raleigh. 919-834-4040. marbleskidsmuseum.org. Yates by Night: Early Summer Hike. Join a park naturalist for an evening hike to enjoy the sights and sounds of early summer. Learn tips for observing wildlife. Ages 8 and older. Registration required. $5/family. 7:30-8:30 p.m. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 919-8566675. wakegovcom/parks/yatesmill.
7 SATURDAY
Art Adventures. Enjoy art in the galleries and create a take-home treasure using newly learned art-making techniques. Ages 6-9. Register online. Free for members, $5 nonmembers. 1-2:30 p.m. Ackland Art Museum, 101 S. Columbia St., Chapel Hill. 919-9623342. ackland.web.unc.edu/familyprograms/art-adventures. Nature Stories: Turtle Tales. See June 4. 10-11 a.m. Outdoor Fairy Garden Workshop. Make a beach-themed miniature
garden with outdoor plants to adorn your home. Register online. $25 adults, $10 child. 10 a.m. Atlantic Avenue Orchid and Garden, 5217 Atlantic Ave., Raleigh. 919-239-8078. atlanticavenuegarden.com. Paint Along Art Class. Parent and child paint together with guidance from an art instructor. Materials provided. Registration required. $25/child. 10 a.m.-noon. Kidz Celebrate, 6801 Falls of Neuse Rd., Raleigh. 919-645-9799. kidzcelebrate.com. Race 13.1 Midtown Raleigh Half Marathon, 5k and 10k Races. Enjoy a family-friendly racing series to promote the benefits of a healthy lifestyle. The event features face painting, balloon animals, music and more. Register online. $35-$75. Half-marathon begins at 7 a.m.; 5k and 10k races begin at 7:15 a.m. North Hills Mall, Lassiter Mill and Currituck roads, Raleigh. race131.com/races/midtown-raleigh.
8 SUNDAY
Curiosity Club: Let’s Look for Lizards. Children embrace science and nature while developing skills and knowledge to satisfy their curiosity about the natural world. Ages 5-8. Registration required. $12 resident, $16 nonresident. 2-4 p.m. Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 919-387-5980. townofcary.org. Pottery Workshop for Beginners. See June 1. Splash and Dash Duathlon. Take part in a noncompetitive recreational event featuring running and swimming. Register online by June 7. Presented by Fit & Able Productions, Inc. $50/ person, $75/relay team. 8 a.m. Registration begins at 7 a.m. Events held at Cary Family YMCA and Bond Park, Cary. sportoften.com. Tree Trivia. Learn how to identify common piedmont trees while learning facts about them. Ages 8 and older.
calendar Registration required. $5/family. 1-3 p.m. Lake Crabtree County Park, 1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville. 919-460-2723. wakegov.com/parks/lakecrabtree. Triangle Charity Polo Classic. Families pack a picnic and enjoy a polo match. Stomp divots at half time and enter the “Best Dressed” contest. Proceeds benefit Guiding Lights Caregiver Support Network. All ages. $15 in advance; $20 at the gate. Noon 6:30 p.m. MacNair’s Country Acres, 4321 Tryon Rd., Raleigh. trianglecharitypoloclassic.com.
9 MONDAY
Big Lake Boat-A-Bout. Enjoy a 90-minute guided canoe tour. Meet at the Big Lake Boathouse. Registration required. Free. 9 a.m. William B. Umstead State Park, 8801 Glenwood Ave., Raleigh. 919-571-4170. ncparks.gov. Newborn and Infant Basics. Enjoy an informational seminar hosted by Carolina Kids Pediatrics to learn what to expect and how to care for baby during the first six months of infancy. Registration required. Free. 6:30 p.m. Babies “R” Us, 7810 Poyner Pond Circle, Raleigh. 919-875-4131. babiesrus.com.
10 TUESDAY
Time for Tots: Skiffs, Sharpies and Sailing Ships. See June 3.
11 WEDNESDAY
Bringing Baby Home. Attend a seminar hosted by Durham Pediatrics to learn what to expect and how to care for a baby during the first six months of infancy. Registration required. Free. 6:30 p.m. Babies “R” Us, 7001 Fayetteville Rd., Durham. 919-5449024. babiesrus.com. Infant CPR Certification. Learn how to respond to choking, breathing and cardiac emergencies in an infant. Call 919-622-1668 or email birthinstructor@aol.com to register.
$30. 6:30 p.m. Babies “R” Us, 201 Crossroads Blvd., Cary. 919-859-1971. babiesrus.com.
12 THURSDAY
Greensboro Science faSCInating finds! Center greensboroscience.org
Snakes Alive! Join a park ranger to learn about the slithering creatures that inhabit not only the park but also your neighborhood. Registration required. Free. 3:30 p.m. William B. Umstead State Park, 8801 Glenwood Ave., Raleigh. 919-571-4170. ncparks.gov.
13 FRIDAY
Nature Nuts: Fireflies. Go nutty for nature as children satisfy some of their curiosity about the world around them and parents share in the joy of discovery. Ages 3-5 with parent. Registration required. $11 resident, $14 nonresident. 10-11 a.m. Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 919-387-5980. townofcary.org.
14 SATURDAY
OPEN NOW THRU 9/1/14
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Birding Hike: Resident Birds. Join a CARPM_140600_GreensboroSci.indd bird enthusiast to learn about resident birds. Registration required. Free. 8:30 a.m. William B. Umstead State Park, 8801 Glenwood Ave., Raleigh. 919-571-4170. ncparks.gov. Chainmaille Jewelry Workshop. Learn introductory techniques with aluminum jump rings to create jewelry. Ages 7-12. Registration required. $18/child plus $6 materials fee. 2:30-4:30 p.m. Durham Arts Council, 120 Morris St., Durham. 919-560-2726. durhamarts.org. Drawing for Tweens. Explore selected works and identify skills that the artist used to make them. Materials provided. Ages 10-13. Registration required. Free for members, $5 nonmembers. 10:30 a.m.-noon. Ackland Art Museum, 101 S. Columbia St., Chapel Hill. 919-962-3342. ackland.org. Eco-Explorers: Operation Wetland Exploration. Children learn about local plants and animals. Ages 7-10.
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FESTIVALS
Racing pigs will return again this year to the Peak City Pig Fest in Apex. The pig races were favorites for families at last year's event. Photo courtesy of Hunter Wilson
Art in the Village
Celebration of the Arts
June 1 – All ages enjoy an exhibit showcasing fine arts and crafts. Forrest Greenslade’s children’s poetry book, Haicooo: Little Poems for Children, will be for sale. Kids can enjoy Fearrington’s cows and striped goats. Free. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Artist Studios, Fearrington Village, Hwy. 15/501, Pittsboro. fearringtonartists.org.
June 7 – Take the family for live entertainment, arts and crafts, children’s rides, inflatables, a classic car show and more. Free. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Downtown Fuquay-Varina. celebratefv.com.
3rd Annual Peak City Pig Fest
June 1 –Step back in time for an afternoon of merriment, music, games, traditional craft demonstrations and art-making activities. Free. 1-4 p.m. N.C. Museum of Art, 2110 Blue Ridge Rd., Raleigh. 919-839-6262. ncartmuseum.org.
June 21 – Take the family for food and fun built around a Kansas City Barbecue Societysanctioned barbecue competition. Attractions include music, food booths, pig races, a kids play area and competitive barbecue teams. All ages. Free. 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Downtown Apex, 220 N. Salem St., Apex. 919-608-0209. peakcitypigfest.com.
Dog Days of June
Fairy Festival
June 7 – This day of fun for families and dogs includes a canine Frisbee disc competition, dog wash, rabies and microchip clinics, vendors and more. Some events charge a fee. All ages. Free. 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Bond Park, 801 High House Rd., Cary. 919-469-4100. townofcary.org.
June 21 – Enjoy activities and a contest. 9 a.m.-noon. Atlantic Avenue Orchid and Garden, 5217 Atlantic Ave., Raleigh. 919-239-8078. atlanticavenuegarden.com/fairy-festival-raleighfairy-gardening.
Family Renaissance Fair
Pollinator Festival Folk Festival June 7 – Family crafts and activities from the 1930s celebrate the final weekend of the “In Search of a New Deal” exhibition. See antique cars and tractors on display and enjoy games and stories. Hear live music from the 1920s through the 1950s at 11 a.m. and 12:30 p.m. Observe artisans demonstrating their skills in pottery, quilting, woodworking and more. Free. 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Historic Oak View County Park, 4028 Carya Dr., Raleigh,. 919-212-7695. wakegov.com/parks/oakview.
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June 21 – Celebrate everything pollinators do for the planet. Enjoy games, crafts, prizes, guest speakers and more. Free. 10 a.m.-3 p.m. Lake Crabtree County Park, 1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville. 919-460-2723. wakegov.com/parks/lakecrabtree.
Community Life Festival June 28 – Take the family for face painting, kids activities, food, vendor booths and more. Free. 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Life International, 4823 Meadow Dr., Durham. 919-382-1944. lifeinternational.us.
Registration required. $12 residents, $16 nonresidents. 2-4 p.m. Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 919-387-5980. townofcary.org. Family Rhythm Jam. Drumming and stories for ages 3 and up with parent. Drums to loan. $10/family. 10-11 a.m. Music Explorium, 5314 Hwy. 55, Ste. 107, Durham. 919-219-2371. musicexplorium.com. Family Wildlife Series: Totally Turtles. Learn about turtles and how they “earn” a living. All ages. Registration required. $5/family. 2-3:30 p.m. Blue Jay Point County Park, 3200 Pleasant Union Church Rd., Raleigh. 919-870-4330. wakegov.com/parks/bluejay. Make It, Take It: Mix That Media! Watch Alyssa Hinton, whose work is inspired by her North Carolina Indian heritage, create mixed media. Make your own mixed media picture to take home. Drop-in program. Free. Noon-3 p.m. N.C. Museum of History, 5 E. Edenton St., Raleigh. 919807-7992. ncmuseumofhistory.org. Nature Nuts: Fireflies. See June 13. Project Dance with American Dance Festival. Join Jody Cassell from American Dance Festival and explore how sounds, rhythms and creative movements tell a tale. $5 ages 1 and older. 1-2 p.m. Marbles Kids Museum, 201 E. Hargett St., Raleigh. 919-834-4040. marbleskidsmuseum.org.
15 SUNDAY
Family Feature: Let’s Talk Turtles. Discover the turtles that live at the park and examine the adaptations they have in order to survive. Play turtle bingo and meet residents up close. All ages. Registration required. $5/family. 2-3 p.m. Crowder District Park, 4709 Ten-Ten Rd., Apex. 919662-2850. wakegov.com/parks/crowder. Young Ecologists: Stream Team. Explore the streams to cool off in summer. Ages 10-13. Registration required. $12 resident, $16 nonresident. 2-4 p.m. Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 919-387-5980. townofcary.org.
calendar
16 MONDAY
Butterflies and Moths. See June 2. Home School Day: Animal Tails. Enjoy animal tales and play games. Ages 7-10. Registration required. $6/child. 10-11:30 a.m. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 919-856-6675. wakegov.com/ parks/yatesmill/ages/programs.aspx.
17 TUESDAY
Pop-In-Playtime. Drop-in play. Wear socks. $7/child, $5/sibling, adults free. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Pump It Up of Raleigh, 10700 World Trade Blvd., Raleigh. 919-828-3344. pumpitupparty.com.
18 WEDNESDAY
Breastfeeding 101. Attend a seminar about breastfeeding, including what to expect, common concerns and support options. Registration required. Free. 6:30 p.m. Babies “R” Us, 7001 Fayetteville Rd., Durham. 919-544-9024. babiesrus.com. Infant CPR Certification. Learn how to respond to choking, breathing and cardiac emergencies in an infant. Call 919-622-1668 or email birthinstructor@aol.com to register. $30. 6:30 p.m. Babies “R” Us, 7810 Poyner Pond Circle, Raleigh. 919-8754131. babiesrus.com. Little Sprouts: The Longest Summer Day. Discover the science and cultural celebrations behind June 21. Make a sun catcher to hang in a window. Ages 3-5 with adult. Registration required. $4/child. 1-2 p.m. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 919-856-6675. wakegov. com/parks/yatesmill. Summer Drop-in Studio. Kids make art. Free. Noon-3 p.m. N.C. Museum of Art, 2110 Blue Ridge Rd., Raleigh. 919-839-6262. ncartmuseum.org.
19 THURSDAY
Pop-In-Playtime. See June 17.
20 FRIDAY
Pop-In-Playtime. See June 17.
21 SATURDAY
Barnyard Birthday Bash. Celebrate the resident goats’ ninth birthday with games, activities and cake. All ages. Free. 10 a.m.-noon. Historic Oak View County Park, 4028 Carya Dr., Raleigh. 919-250-1013. wakegov.com/parks/oakview. Curtain Call with Stars Theater and Arts Center. Sing, dance and act. Join guest stars from Stars Theater and Arts Center for theater fun. $5 ages 1 and older. 11 a.m., noon. Marbles Kids Museum, 201 E. Hargett St., Raleigh. 919-834-4040. marbleskidsmuseum.org. Family Farm Fun. Learn about life on a farm. Paint with produce, dig into soil science and get moving with barnyard fun. $5 ages 1-adult. 1-3 p.m. Marbles Kids Museum, 201 E. Hargett St., Raleigh. 919-834-4040. marbleskidsmuseum.org. Family Wildlife Series: Pollination Sensation. Learn about pollinators and make a craft. All ages. Registration required. $5/family. 9:30-11 a.m. Blue Jay Point County Park, 3200 Pleasant Union Church Rd., Raleigh. 919-870-4330. wakegov.com/parks/bluejay. Go BMX Day. Enjoy BMX riding. Take equipment. All ages. $9/all-day session. Free for members. Noon-10 p.m. Sk8-Cary, 2040 N.W. Maynard Rd., Cary. 919-380-2970. townofcary.org. Hiking, Stick With It! Join a park ranger to make a hiking stick and go for a short hike on a trail. Children ages 15 and younger must be accompanied by an adult. Wear hiking shoes or boots. Registration required. Free. 10 a.m. William B. Umstead State Park, 8801 Glenwood Ave., Raleigh. 919-5714170. ncparks.gov. Homeschool 101: Beginning Basics Seminar. Parents learn about home
schooling, daily details, laws, testing and how to choose methods and materials. Features a continental breakfast and refreshments. Child care not provided. Register online. $15/person or $20/couple before June 13. $25/person or $30/couple after June 13 or at the door. $. 8:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Registration begins at 8 a.m. White Plains United Methodist Church, Christian Life Center Building, 313 S.E. Maynard Rd., Cary. dayspringhomeeducators.com. Junior Naturalist: Snake and Bake. Participants develop their naturalist skills and understanding of local nature. Ages 5-8 with parent. Registration required. $8 resident, $10 nonresident. 11 a.m.-noon. Stevens Nature Center/Hemlock Bluffs, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 919-387-5980. townofcary.org. Natural Explorations: Summer Sightings. Go on a wild expedition into the wet and wooded land surrounding the pond. All ages. Registration required. Free. 8:30-9:30 a.m. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 919-8566675. wakegov.com/parks/yatesmill. Paint Along Art Class. See June 7. Pirates, Ahoy! Make crafts and hear tales about Blackbeard and other seafarers. Ages 5-8. Registration required. $10/nonmembers, $8/ members. 10 a.m.-noon. N.C. Museum of History, 5 E. Edenton St., Raleigh. 919-807-7992. ncmuseumofhistory.org. Saturday for Kids. Enjoy Mo Willems’ new book, My New Friend is So Fun. Free. 11 a.m. Barnes & Noble, 760 S.E. Maynard Rd., Cary. 919-467-3866. bn.com.
townofcary.org. Hemlock Nature Quest: Herp Patrol. Search the wetlands for snakes, lizards and more. Ages 13-15. Registration required. $12 resident, $16 nonresident. 2-4 p.m. Stevens Nature Center/ Hemlock Bluffs, 2616 Kildaire Farm Rd., Cary. 919-387-5980. townofcary.org. Mom and Me Upcycle Basic Jewelry Design Class. Learn the basic techniques in making earrings and bracelets. Ages 9 and older. Register online. $15 plus $5 supply fee. 2-3:30 p.m. Southern Charm Gift Boutique, Cary Towne Center, 1105 Walnut St., Cary. 919-233-1598. etsy.com/shop/southerncharmgifts2. Sunset Canoe Trip. Join park staff for a canoe trip. Learn basic paddling techniques and look for wildlife. Maximum two adults and one child per canoe. Ages 5 and older. All ages. Registration required. $10 per canoe. 7-9 p.m. Lake Crabtree County Park, 1400 Aviation Pkwy., Morrisville. 919-460-2723. wakegov.com/parks/ lakecrabtree.
22 SUNDAY
25 WEDNESDAY
Go Skateboarding Day. Enjoy skateboarding, a mini ramp jam and challenges. Take a skateboard. All ages. $9/all-day session. Free for members. Noon-10 p.m. Sk8-Cary, 2040 N.W. Maynard Rd., Cary. 919-380-2970.
23 MONDAY
Breastfeeding Cafe. Discuss breastfeeding questions with an accredited La Leche League leader and meet other mothers. Infants welcome. Free. 1-2 p.m. The Red Hen, University Mall, 201 S. Estes Dr., Chapel Hill. 919-9424420. theredhen.com.
24 TUESDAY
Special Storytime. Enjoy the 20th anniversary of Five Little Monkeys Jumping on the Bed. Free. 11 a.m. Barnes & Noble, 760 S.E. Maynard Rd., Cary. 919-467-3866. bn.com.
Garden Sprouts With Produce Box. Shuck corn, make tasty corn recipes and learn all about fruits and veggies fresh from the farm. $5 ages 1-11. 11 a.m-1 p.m. Marbles Kids Museum, 201 E. Hargett St., Raleigh.
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marbleskidsmuseum.org. Infant CPR Certification. Learn how to respond to choking, breathing and cardiac emergencies in an infant. Call 919-622-1668 or email birthinstructor@aol.com to register. $30. 6:30 p.m. Babies “R” Us, 7001 Fayetteville Rd., Durham. 919-544-9024. babiesrus.com. Summer Drop-in Studio. See June 18.
26 THURSDAY
Kick-off to Kindergarten. Practice a lunch line, get moving at recess, hop on a school bus and explore circle time. For rising year-round kindergartners and their families. Free. 5-8 p.m. Marbles Kids Museum, 201 E. Hargett St., Raleigh. 919-834-4040. marbleskidsmuseum.org.
27 FRIDAY
Crowder by Night: Summer Fun. Play nature games, observe nocturnal animals and roast s’mores around
11 a.m-3 p.m. Marbles Kids Museum, 201 E. Hargett St., Raleigh. 919-8344040. marbleskidsmuseum.org. Holt Brothers Football Camp. Former NFL football players Terrence and Torry Holt teach young players about sportsmanship and teamwork. Register online. $50. Morning session grades 1-8; afternoon session grades 9-12. See website for times. Dail Outdoor Football Practice Facility, N.C. State University, 4600 Trinity Rd., Raleigh. holtbrothersfootball.com. Kidz Night Out. Kids enjoy a pajama slumber party, the movie The Emperor’s New Groove, a craft and healthy snack while parents enjoy a night out. Registration required. $25 members, $30 nonmembers. 6-10 p.m. Kidz Celebrate, 6801 Falls of Neuse Rd., Raleigh. 919-645-9799. kidzcelebrate.com. Nature Nuts: Snakes. See June 13. Paddle the Pond. Enjoy a morning canoe float. After basic instruction, explore
the campfire. All ages. Registration required. $5/family. 7:30-8:30 p.m. Crowder District Park, 4709 Ten-Ten Rd., Apex. 919-662-2850. wakegov.com/parks/crowder.
28 SATURDAY
Community Life Festival. Enjoy kids activities, face painting, food, vendor booths, a fire engine and police bike rodeo and more. Free. 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Life International, 4823 Meadow Dr., Durham. 919-382-1944. lifeinternational.us. Family Fishing Fun. Learn to fish the old-fashioned way. Supplies provided. Ages 5 and older with adult. Registration required. $5/family. 9-10 a.m. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 919-8566675. wakegov.com/parks/yatesmill. FutureVet Play Day with Banfield Pet Hospital. Learn alongside a real veterinarian and explore careers in pet health and more. $5 ages 1-adult.
the pond’s many features as seen only from the water. Canoes, paddles and life jackets provided. Subject to suitable weather conditions. Ages 6 and older. Registration required. $10/boat. 10:30-11:30 a.m. Historic Yates Mill County Park, 4620 Lake Wheeler Rd., Raleigh. 919-856-6675. wakegov.com/parks/yatesmill. Polymer Clay Class. Learn to create basic canes and make beads with your cane design. Ages 14 and older. Register online. $25. 1-4 p.m. Southern Charm Gift Boutique, Cary Town Center, 1105 Walnut St., Cary. 919-467-7514. etsy. com/shop/southerncharmgifts2.
29 SUNDAY
Curiosity Club: Sneakin’ Up on Squirrels. See June 8. Paddle the Pond. See June 28. 11 a.m.-noon.
30 MONDAY
Curious Creatures: Serious about Snakes. See June 5. 1-3 p.m.
CALENDAR POLICY The Carolina Parent calendar lists local and regional activities for children and families. To submit an event for consideration, email carolinaparent.com/thingstodo/calendar/calendarform.php by the 8th of the month for the next month’s issue. Readers, please call ahead to confirm dates and times. This calendar may include some events not intended for young children.
Celebrate America! July Fourth Events
All-American Festival in Selma. Take the family for live entertainment, vendors, a kids area and a fireworks display. Free. 5-10 p.m. Uptown Selma. selma-nc.com. Cary Independence Day Olde Time Celebration. Celebrate July Fourth with a parentchild fishing tournament, parade in the park, family contests and more. Registration for the fishing tournament begins at 7:30 a.m. and parade preparations begin at 9:30 a.m. at the Kiwanis Shelter. Free. 7:30 a.m.-3 p.m. Bond Park, 801 High House Rd., Cary. 919-469-4100. townofcary.org. Festival for the Eno. This festival honors the river’s nature, culture and history. Live performances, kids’ activities, traditional and international fare, artisans, workshops and more round out the fun. All ages. $20 adults, $10 ages 13-17. Free for ages 12 and younger. 10 a.m.-6 p.m. West Point on the Eno Durham City Park, Roxboro Rd., Durham. enoriver.org/festival. Joel Lane Museum House Presents an Old-Fashioned Fourth of July Celebration. Costumed docents and re-enactors demonstrate various aspects of Colonial life. Take part in hands-on activities such as writing with a quill pen or making rag dolls. Kids enjoy old-fashioned crafts and games. Free lemonade for all. Free. 11 a.m.-4 p.m. Joel Lane Museum House, 728 W. Hargett St., Raleigh. 919-833-3431. joellane.org. Independence Day Celebration at Booth Amphitheatre. Celebrate America’s birthday with kids activities, contests, a model boat regatta and Ferris Wheel. The Cary Town Band and the N.C. Symphony deliver patriotic music before a grand fireworks display at
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9 p.m. Free. 3-10 p.m. Booth Amphitheatre, 8003 Regency Pkwy., Cary. 919-462-2025. townofcary.org. July Fourth Celebration in Hillsborough. Enjoy a parade along West Tryon Street at 9 a.m., a public reading of the Declaration of Independence at the Old Orange County Courthouse at 10 a.m., and live music and pony rides at the Farmers Market Pavilion and River Park until 3 p.m. Free. 9 a.m.-3 p.m. Historic Hillsborough, 919-732-7741. visithillsboroughnc.com/july4th. Knightdale Independence Day Celebration. Knightdale’s first July Fourth Celebration features food trucks, fun activities, live music from The Embers and a fireworks display at 9:15 p.m. Free. 5-9:30 p.m. Knightdale Station Park, 810 North First Ave., Knightdale. knightdalenc.gov.
Signature
Date
business directory Atlas International School
Ashebridge LEARN. SHARE. LAUGH. GROW.
Atlas
Wynns family Psychology
Preschool to Grade 8
• Student/Teacher Ratio 6 to 1 • Challenging Core Curriculum
Preschool & Summer Camps Before & After School Care AsheBridge.com
• Spanish, French, Violin, Piano • Strong Emphasis on Health
Fuquay-Varina Full-Day 7am-6pm (919) 762-0605 Downtown Cary Mornings 9am-1pm (919) 462-3450
Let’s Bounce
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4/14/14 Call LittleDreamers.pdf for a tour: 919-623-2323
9:55:37 AM
atlasinternationalschool.com
Little Dreamers
Half-Day • Ages 2-5 • 9:15am-12:30pm Extended Day: 9:15am-1:15pm Pre-K Kindergarten Readiness Academic & Social Curriculum!
www.carypreschool.com
carypreschool@yahoo.com 171 High House Rd. (Cary Plaza), Cary
919-319-9332
ENROLLING FOR SUMMER CAMP
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Reading Reading SoSolutions lutions Raleigh
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Help with reading problems.
• Trained & experienced clinicians • We test, diagnose, remediate & post-test all students • Average gains are 3-4 grade levels after 120 hours of clinic • H.O.T. Skills (Higher Order Thinking)
919-986-0665 readingsolutionsraleigh.com
Your Family Connection Every Day 5/6/14CARPM_140500_LittleDreamers.indd 10:24:06 AM 5/19/14 6:23:05 PM 1
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Turn to Carolina Parent for everything you need to know about life with kids in the Triangle. Visit CarolinaParent.com for parenting news,
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919-956-2430 carolinaparent.com carolinaparent.com || JUNE JUNE 2014 2014
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Ammaar, 3, of Chapel Hill, plays basketball at Marbles Kids Museum in Raleigh.
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Layla and Rylie, both 6, of Clayton, enjoy the fruits of their labors after picking strawberries at Smith’s Nursery.
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Ian, 3, of Clayton, enjoys a birthday party at Lake Wheeler with his mom. Laura, 2, and Mark, 4, of Cary, participate in Bond Park’s annual Easter egg hunt.
Submit high-resolution photos of your kids having fun around the Triangle. Go to carolinaparent.com/facesandplaces. You could even win a prize! Congratulations to our May winner, Christine, 11, of Durham.
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NC Zoo
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BOONE, NC Mountains of Family Fun! Watauga
Whitewater Rafting
Grandfather Mountain Tweetsie Railroad
Ziplining
Summer Fun! Biking Discover a ton of fun in the Boone area exploring family attractions including Tweetsie Railroad and Grandfather Mountain, or whitewater rafting, biking, hiking, ziplining and more!
800-852-9506