Tuscaloosa Runs This overloaded are you safe, who is missing, who is accounted for, can we find this person, can we find that person, I think my student is missing, I think my student is dead, where are you where are you where are you where are you where is my baby can you help me find my baby she’s gone I can’t find her. We drink beer the first night, begin to rebuild in the morning, begin to lose it immediately, it being our selfishness and self-absorption, our minds, our anger at place, circumstance, the past years. Where are you, where are you, are you alive, everything is gone, gone, everything is gone.
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Negotiation of space, how many minutes until I leave because I have to, we will sleep in the same bed for days out of stress, out of fear. We will wear dirty clothes, eat at friend’s houses, some will work and some are numb, some will leave and some will stay. My arm will curl around your waist and you will settle into my shape and we will sleep only a few hours a night, in dirty clothes, but together because we can’t let go of the city yet, we can’t let go of each other yet, I don’t want you to leave, I don’t want you to go, just stay one more week, stay one more year, where did the time go, I can’t believe you have to leave, I don’t want you to leave. I will weep in my few hours of sleep for so long that I don’t know when I will sleep without weeping. You will say in your sleep just leave me alone and that means please don’t go I can’t believe this happened to me, to us, to our city, what do we do now, I love you. Negotiation of time, minutes and days, the body count steady then rising then steady then rising and we laugh in order not to snap, to break, to breakdown, to fallout, to go insane.