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BELLWETHER Volume 2 | Issue 4 | Fourth Quarter 2011

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sections

6 Letter from the Editor

Leadership

Sales and Marketing

Cover Story

Book Report

Customer Relationships

Industry News

Customer Story

Human Resources

26 4

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

8 12 22

LETTERFROMTHEEDITOR

BELLWETHER

A Blytheco, LLC Magazine Volume 2 Fourth Quarter, 2011 www.blytheco.com www.bellwethermagazine.com

STAFF

EDITOR Apryl Hanson CREATIVE DIRECTOR Greg Went

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CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Alicia Anderson Steve Geske Howard Hansen Apryl Hanson Jeff Johnson, CPA and Tom Siders, CPA Brian Kelly Nicole Laurier Mike Marino, Ph.D. Lt. Col. Rob ‘Waldo’ Waldman Dawn Westerberg Geni Whitehouse ADVERTISING SALES Dori Fitch SUBSCRIPTIONS www.bellwethermagazine.com Or contact Dori Fitch (800) 425-9843, Extension 1168 dorif@blytheco.com Bellwether Magazine is published by Blytheco, LLC with principal offices at: 23161 Mill Creek Road Suite 200 Laguna Hills, CA 92653 If you wish to be removed from the mailing list or to add names to the mailing list, send your request, including name, business name, and mailing address to the above address or to dorif@blytheco.com This is a copyrighted publication and all articles herein are covered by this copyright. Any use of the content for commercial reasons or other form or reproduction of material herein is strictly prohibited without prior, written approval of Bellwether Magazine.

bell•weth•er -noun: one who takes initiative or leadership

LEADERSHIP What the Experts Couldn’t Tell You about Communication, Relationships and Creating Change

ave you ever found yourself baffled and frustrated by someone’s inability to understand your point of view? Have you ever found yourself driven to order the latest book or attend the latest seminar in an attempt to improve your communication skills? Of course you have.

With all of the “communication” out there about communication,

But what if all that you’ve learned was not the whole story? What

with all of the articles, books and 3-ring workshop binders, what

if all these observations and rules only represented a “virtual”

if there was a secret dynamic that all of them have been missing?

reality? (like the Matrix!) What if there was a whole other reality

What if that secret was so fundamental to every relationship

behind what you’ve been doing that changes all the rules?

that understanding it would revolutionize your understanding

What if it turned out that in your game of “communication

of communication and completely transform your relationships

pool,” someone secretly replaced the cue ball with one made

both business and personal?

of steel and then placed magnets under the table?

As it turns out, there is such a secret. And though it takes a

The “Hidden Level of Communication Reality”

lifetime to learn to use it fully, understanding the basic dynamic behind all relationships and all communication is fairly simple. Communication Skills - a “Virtual” Reality The first step in understanding this secret dynamic is to open your mind about what you’ve been taught about communication so far. You’ve been taught that communication is a straightforward, logical process of cause and effect. Rooted in common language and standardized meanings, communication has been presented as a skill in producing shared meaning. Pay attention to definitions, syntax and the organization of ideas, take into account cultural, gender and generational differences, toss in a few neurological studies and rapport skills and you’ve got your basic recipe. When “the bubble” over the other person’s head matches “the bubble” over your head, you’ve been successful. Communication is presented much like learning to play billiards. You learn some basic rules of physics. You learn to predict the outcome of certain trajectories and interactions. You learn the cause and effect rules of the billiard balls so you can plan your next shot on the table. Once you’ve sunk all the balls on the

As it turns out, the process of communication is far more complex than what we have been led to believe. For over 20 years now, theorists in a field called “Family Systems Theory” have been uncovering the hidden reality behind the reality in which we have been operating. These theorists have learned that communication is not a logical process; it is an emotional process. They have learned that communication is not linear cause and effect. You can’t control outcomes by controlling the input. They have uncovered a reality behind the virtual reality and hidden “rules” that operate quite differently from what we normally expect. In the same way physicists have discovered a quantum reality with its own rules that makes up our universe, these theorists have discovered a quantum level of reality with its own rules that is hidden behind the level we observe with our five senses. To continue our billiards metaphor, they have discovered the “magnets” under the table of communication. So what is this reality that underlies the “virtual” reality within which we have all been tying to operate? What are the rules? What makes up the “underside of the table” regarding our behavior and our relationships?

table and taken care of the 8-ball, you win!

About the Author

Steve Geske is President and Co-founder of the consulting firm Healing Leaders, whose mission is “To develop enlightened leaders through self awareness, resourceful responsiveness and authentic presence.” He is a frequent author and speaker on the topic of leadership development. Learn more about Steve at www.healingleaders.com

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

The “Magnets” Under the Table As it turns out, this reality is not logical. It is emotional. By “emotional”, we don’t mean happy or sad stuff. I’m not talking about our emotions. We are talking instead about the set of instincts developed through thousands of years of evolution that motivate our most basic behaviors. These include the flight or fight response, the herding response (yes, we are a herding species) and the shortcuts that have

An Emotional Triangle understands that relationships are ALWAYS in threes. There is always at least one other person, entity or thing that makes up the third element in a relationship. The Third Element Almost anything can make up the third element in an Emotional Triangle. It can be:

been hardwired into our brains causing us to act first and

• A person

then make up the logical reason for acting a millisecond

• A role

AFTER we have responded.

• A belief

Neurological research demonstrates that logical choice and volition are primarily an illusion created by our conscious awareness. We have the impression that we make many conscious choices each day. Some of us believe those choices are mostly ruled by logic. The research indicates

• An addiction • A neurosis or a fear Positions within an Emotional Triangle Emotional Triangles have two “positions.”

otherwise. Muscle responses can be observed moving

1. Inside - containing two people, or one person and a

an arm or a finger BEFORE conscious awareness of any

thing or entity. This position is always shared and feels

decision to do so. While conscious intention and choice are

comfortable and safe. It is the position we instinctively

possible, in fact, most of us are running on automatic pilot

prefer and seek in all our behaviors.

during most of the day. Our brains are creating the fiction we call “choice.” We are emotional beings operating on

2. Outside - containing one other person, thing or entity.

these well established internal programs

This position feels anxious and threatening. Instinctively, we avoid the outside position

The automatic, non-logical, emotional character of our inner selves presents a challenge to communication and the way we behave in relationship to each other. One basic premise, proposed by Family Systems theory, is that a relationship between two people will always contain a certain level of anxiety and over time, this builds up

Emotional Triangles - Illustrated Emotional Triangles are evident in all relationships. An example can be seen in the relationships of children especially girls.

and threatens the relationship. In order to stabilize the

Observe, Mary and Jane on the playground. They are best

relationship, these two people subconsciously collude

friends forever (“BFFs”). They like the same clothes, music,

in redirecting the anxiety between them towards a third

pop stars but unfortunately, the same boy. Now that’s

person, entity or idea. This means that the basic unit of

a problem because it threatens their “BFF” status and

all relationships is not two but three. This unit of three is

creates anxiety between them. What are they to do?

called an “Emotional Triangle.” Emotional triangles (ET’s) make up the “magnets under the table” in the game of relationships and communication. Emotional Triangles make up the crucial dynamic that has likely been frustrating your best efforts “on top of the table” as you try to “line up your shots” in attempting to communicate with others. Below is a brief tutorial:

Unconsciously, to help stabilize their friendship, they start whispering about Suzie behind her back. They make fun of the way she looks and acts. They tease her, Suzie gets mad at both of them. BFF status secured! Mary and Jane’s friendship is now tighter because of a common enemy without having to

Emotional Triangles

address the fact that they both like the same boy.

ET’s are a way to understand how relationships REALLY

“The enemy of my enemy is my friend.”

operate. They provide a reliable “map” that is an alternative to relying on linear, cause and effect understandings of

Continued on page 30

relationships based on the social science model of reality.

bell•weth•er -noun: one who takes initiative or leadership

SALES&MARKETING by Lt. Col. Rob “Waldo” Waldman (The Wingman)

wo long minutes passed since I last changed radio frequencies. We were approaching the Iraqi border and my flight lead still had not checked me in. I was getting nervous. Having no radio contact at 20,000 feet and separated from my fellow pilots by 10 miles on a night combat mission in hostile territory was a dire situation. What if I lost my engine or was engaged by ground fire? How could I call for help? Without my radio, I felt very vulnerable. If I didn’t get checked in, I would have to abort the mission and head back to base. Suddenly my back-up VHF radio blared with the terse sound of my flight lead, “2, come up 239.9.” I breathed a sigh of relief and immediately changed frequency. “Vipers, check-in, confirm master-arm hot!” We acknowledged his call on the radio in a crisp, monotone cadence, “2, 3, 4.” I flipped the master arm switch to the “hot” position and readied my weapons. My wingmen and I were now one synchronized formation, with a clear flight plan and a mission objective that had been delivered in our pre-mission briefing. Our radios and radar linked us together. We were ready for battle. Communication in combat is essential to successfully execute a plan. It ensures safety, keeps everyone focused on their responsibilities, and builds awareness in rapidly changing environments. In order to communicate effectively in the heat of battle, fighter pilots: 1. Brief the mission in order to establish objectives, delegate responsibilities, analyze threats, and review contingency plans. 2. Establish a communication (“comm”) game plan which confirms when and where to change frequencies. 3. Ensure positive two-way communication is 8

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

established during critical elements of a mission. 4. Brief a back-up plan in case communication fails (known as “radio-out” procedures). 5. Debrief every mission to review lessons learned and reinforce training. When the heat is on and adversity strikes, how do

you communicate with your team? Do you have a “comm plan” with your employees, colleagues, and customers? Are you taking the time to brief your missions to ensure all your wingmen are on the same wave length and understand their roles, responsibilities, and objectives? Finally, are you aware of those who might be on the wrong frequency or off course? If so, what’s your plan to get them back on target? Checking in with your wingmen, listening to their questions, and understanding their challenges are fundamental components of teamwork and leadership. They are the cornerstones in building an environment of mutual support and trust, especially in rapidly changing, competitive environments. Want to communicate better with your team? Try out these communication “wingtips” and watch the impact they have on your organization. 1. Have a ‘mass briefing’ at least once a month. Gather your troops and communicate the latest

LEADERSHIP trends, organizational goals, sales updates, and product upgrades etc. Your wingmen need to hear important news (both good and bad) from you first. This is also a great time to publicly recognize your top performers. 2. Conduct feedback sessions on a consistent basis. Sit down with your wingmen and let them know how they are doing. Are they meeting your expectations? Ask about their goals and challenges and how you can help. Then solicit feedback on you as a leader. What could you be doing better? What would they like to see from you? Avoid letting your ego get in the way of their feedback.

3. Walk the flight line. Get your hands dirty with your wingmen. Spend time with them on the job and observe how they do business. Ask questions. Show them your appreciation by connecting with them as people first and employees second.

execution. The greater your SA, the greater your ability to solve problems, handle contingencies, and adapt to change. So, make it a priority to check in and stay in communication with your team. It’s one of the most important things you can do as a leader to build situational awareness and trust. For if you fail to check in with your wingmen, they’re likely to check out.

About the author: Lt. Col. Rob “Waldo” Waldman (The Wingman ) is the New York Times and Wall Street Journal bestselling author of Never Fly Solo. A leadership speaker and consultant, his clients include HP, Verizon, Aflac, Nokia and New York Life and he’s been featured on CNN, Fox News, The Harvard Business Review and MSNBC. To learn more about Waldo and his programs and to download his Top Gun Sales Team white paper, visit www.YourWingman.com or call 1-866-925-3616.

4. De-brief your missions. Remove your ‘rank’ and conduct a nameless, blameless, and rank-less de-brief after every critical mission. Find out if objectives were met and analyze why they weren’t. Search for trends and communicate these to the rest of your organization. Your aim when communicating should be to create an environment where others can come to you for help. Try to listen as much as possible in order to build what’s known as Situational Awareness (SA). SA is a comprehensive understanding of the mission, your surroundings, and the variables that can affect its

bell•weth•er -noun: one who takes initiative or leadership

SALES&MARKETING

ou want to grow your company, and your sales team is critical to enabling that growth, right? But hiring good salespeople is tough for two reasons: 1) great salespeople are always in demand so the by Alicia Anderson market is always tight, even when economic times are tough; and 2) salespeople are really good at selling themselves, so they can tell you what you want to hear. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s your job to be prepared.

Early in the hiring process, review the job posting to be

Set expectations very clearly. What will it take for your

sure itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s still relevant for your business. Map out what you

new salesperson to achieve success at your company? The

are looking for in a salesperson, and write down some

more details you can provide about what you expect, the

potential interview questions. Having a few qualifications

easier time a salesperson will have managing their time

in mind will help you weed out resumes.

and resources to achieve those goals.

Take a look at your buyer. If your decision-maker is a

Let them learn from others. Have them ride along with

highly technical manager, you need a salesperson that can

more experienced salespeople. Let them spend time

get very deep technically. If your buyer is more of a CEO, a

with the customer service representatives. Expose the

candidate with experience meeting with executives will be

new salesperson to team members who know what they

a good fit. Match your sales team to your buyers.

are doing â&#x20AC;&#x201C; this will help them learn the language and

Listen and watch for clues. Did the candidate research your business before the interview? If not, will they be

Have regular one-on-one meetings with your reps.

equally unprepared for the meeting with your prospect? Is

This is some of the most important time you can spend

their resume clear, persuasive, and free of errors? If not, will

with your sales team. Individual representatives need

they carry a similarly sloppy proposal out to your prospect?

time with you that is structured and consistent to go over

Seek energy and positivity. Both are important to success in sales. Selling can be disheartening and draining, but the good salesperson is persistent, with the ability to look at themselves, their companies, and their industries with optimism and perseverance.

processes of your company.

their specific deals and challenges. This gives the two of you time to work on how to strategically approach certain deals and work on how to win. Here the salesperson can be more vulnerable and let you know how it is going for them personally without having other sales team members involved. Keep this a safe place for them, and a way to

Training salespeople

encourage growth and learning.

There are two types of sales training: the basic mechanics of

Keep it up. Training should not end for ANY of your staff

selling, and specific training on your company or products.

after the first few weeks of employment. Make learning an

Hopefully most of your team is familiar with the mechanics,

ongoing part of your company culture. It keeps your team

but helping them sell your product or company will require

energized and challenged, which means greater results for

a few important steps:

your business.

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

by Apryl Hanson

omehow along the way, with the web being invented and completely changing our sales process, we have forgotten that we are still selling to people who are trying to solve a problem. There is value in solving that problem and people are willing to exchange money for that solution. Yet, we’ve created mounds and mounds of content sitting upon pages and pages of the web describing a product that doesn’t really address a problem at all.

What may be helpful is if we think of that person, sitting

Here’s a hint – most users are going to start with their

in their home or office. What are they going through right

problem.

now? What are they experiencing? AND what will they type into Google?

Most of our websites are calibrated to show up based on solution-related information, like aspirin. Unfortunately,

This may sound like a strange way to go about designing

very few people search on this type of key word. Sure,

your web pages and content. But the user experience is

aspirin is popular, people know what it is and a certain

what we should be trying to understand and develop our

number of people will search on that. What I’m suggesting

pages based on the content they are looking for.

is that while you must have product-related information out

Let’s take a simple example. I love cooking. I’m working away in the kitchen while preparing a meal; I’m moving too fast and accidentally smash my finger in a cabinet drawer. It hurts, but I have no idea how much I’ve injured myself. I ignore it and keep cooking. I wake up in the middle of the night, my finger now swollen and throbbing. What do I do? I turn on my computer to research what???

there, you can’t ignore the fact that there is an entirely large population that isn’t finding what you’re selling.

Suggestion: Run a brainstorming session inside your organization to come up with as many searches people might use on Google to look for what you’re selling. You can even turn it into a contest. Research how often people are using these

Do I search for a “solution,” which might be a splint, a

terms and phrases and incorporate new pages into your

bandage, or aspirin?

website that talk specifically talk to those issues.

Or, do I search for my problem, like “how to determine if you have a broken finger” or “broken finger” or “sprained finger”?

bell•weth•er -noun: one who takes initiative or leadership

COVERSTORY

by Howard Hansen

ewer questions we ask in private conversations or public dialogue with leaders create more surprise than this one: “How much time (as a boss) do you spend with the least mature people in your business?” Sometimes we ask this question when speaking with groups who consist mostly of business owners, managers and leaders. We purposely use the term “least mature” because we have come to believe that performance problems in companies are nearly always demonstrated in those who not only have fundamental disconnects with the organization’s values, but also possess lower levels of

• High performers don’t need much attention. They are self-proficient and self-sufficient. • It’s a good path to becoming a Leader Hero, one who appears to care deeply about the positive contributions and success of everyone.

emotional maturity. By raising hands, audiences usually indicate more than half of their number spend “more than

All

fifty percent of their time working with employees whose

Experience

performance is below acceptable standards.”

improve

When raising their hands, some audience members look like they are ready to be complimented on their dedication to coaching higher performance from those who most need it. We change that expectation when we reply, “What if you spent that much more time with your best performers”? Why is this so? Leaders have been taught to believe in the following thinking:

largely

shows

others’

particularly

myth.

efforts

performance, those

whose

performance is impaired by their own emotional immaturity, creates almost no R.O.I. Most managers and leaders tell us that, despite their best intentions and large investments of time, the likelihood of turning immature team members into adequate performers is slim and turning them into star performers is none. As a result, more than half of

• Efforts to improve substandard performance are likely to improve group aggregate performance.

leaders’ time is often spent on non-productive efforts.

• Identifying poor performance and “turning people around” is one of the sacred responsibilities in every leadership position description. It may invoke a high score on the leader’s performance review from her boss.

All the while, those who are depended upon to produce

• Performance review systems mandate spotting low performance and documenting efforts to improve it.

this

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

critical results get less time from their leaders.

This is

considered acceptable since these high performers appear to be on performance auto-pilot.

When our audience

members consider what they might do to stimulate even

higher performance from the best, had they more time available for them, our listeners surprise themselves with new ideas. Performance reviews, long the bane of managers who dread the responsibility of undertaking them, contribute to this problem of paying attention to the immature. Performance review systems were designed to equip managers with a tool to constructively address poor performance and, with any luck, influence an improvement in that performance. We

argue

that

worsen

the

performance

reviews

time-with-the-immature

ratio by consuming more energy from leaders and placing its focus on the usually

irredeemable

performer.

Performance reviews are conducted through emotional prisms.

time for review discussions

• High reactivity; the tendency to intensely react to challenges and crisis which others take in stride and manage with calm rationality. • Herding; the movement of the emotionally susceptible to gather together, communicate with high anxiety, over define problems and avoid creative efforts to find best solutions. • Blame displacement; a focus on personal victimization by believing challenge and uncomfortable moments and environments are created by others. • Quick fix mentality; the process of rapidly selecting a solution – any nearby and available solution (often the first one considered) – to quickly dispose the uncomfortable existence of an anxiety producing problem.

The least mature (or more immature) in any group, including families, tie up energy resources. eager to create a negative presence.

They are

We have come

to call these people, “step up transformers”.

Neutrally

anxious energy goes in. Highly anxious energy comes out.

The net outcome is leaders’ energy levels are

reduced along with the capacity to focus on creative work.

draw close, both managers and to

employees dread

During

the

review

began meeting.

meetings,

awkward and sometimes fearful defensiveness prevails, despite the best intentions of managers to make it positive, look to the future and offer development assistance. The result is poorer preparation

and

uninspired

delivery of feedback.

Those who

measure

aggregate

About Howard Hansen: Howard Hansen is a principal with the consulting firm Healing Leaders, whose mission is “To develop enlightened leaders through self awareness, resourceful responsiveness and authentic presence.” He is a frequent author and speaker on the topic of leadership development. Learn more about Howard at www.healingleaders.com.

organizational

improvement wonder whether so much effort for so little gain is worth the cost.

Who are the least mature? They can be identified by characteristics offered by Edwin Friedman:

bell•weth•er -noun: one who takes initiative or leadership

COVERSTORY

by Mike Marino, Ph.D.

alt Disney once said “you can dream, build and create the most wonderful place possible

– but people make it happen” … he was right! Your company’s greatest asset is its people. According

to the National Institute of Health, half the workers in America, 51%, will have a diagnosable psychiatric disorder during their lifetime. Your workplace is filled with people who are wrestling with stress, anger, anxiety and depression. In fact, anxiety is the leading mental health issue in the United States closely followed by mood disorders like depression. Statistics from a recent study done at Harvard Medical School, published in The Journal of the American Medical Association, revealed the average person with depression and anxiety issues can’t work or do normal activity for 5 weeks in a year – comparing with just 15 days for diabetes or hypertension. Employed adults with major depression lose about 8 hours of productivity a week on the job. Depression alone costs US employers about $31 billion annually in productivity, not counting disability leave payments. Depression and anxiety sap energy, cause problems with concentration, memory and decision-making.

Supervisors or managers are

extraordinarily impaired because the nature of their work is to – make decisions! And, the personal and financial costs escalate still further if a worker’s untreated depression and anxiety contribute to alcohol or drug abuse. Sadly, only half the people needing treatment are getting any and many of those receiving treatment are still struggling. Frankly, what we’re doing these days isn’t working very well. The use of anti-depressant medications in the United States doubled from 1996 to 2005. Smart employers are beginning to seek expert assistance for their employees, helping them balance their lives from biological, psychological, social

and

spiritual

perspectives.

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

If stress could be defined as overburdening an existing

• Poor concentration

structure or capacity, in general, humans have more stress

• Changes in appetite

today than at any time in history. We have more sensory

• Either slowness of movement or fidgety physical affect

input today than ever before. One Hundred years ago our

• Dark thoughts and talk

two primary sources of information and communication were speech and written materials like books, mail and newspapers.

The came the light bulb, movies, radio,

telephones, TV, faxes, computers, the Internet, e-mail, cell phones, texting, Facebook, Twitter and who knows what instant communication method lies ahead? All the modern conveniences that were supposed to make life easier have also increased the pace and sensory overload of life. Your employees likely have their stress cup filled to overflowing before they even arrive at work!

Teaching your supervisors to watch intently for signs of emotional and mental strain will ultimately make them better and more productive leaders. It’s imperative that supervisors develop and maintain an open and honest dialogue with employees … one that centers on active listening.

This is not the time for a supervisor to give

direction, but rather to listen intently to how the employee answers key questions like… • How are you doing? • What are you feeling?

Companies are finding that when they help their people

• What are you thinking?

– productivity increases, the bottom line is better and

• What is helping you here and what is not?

everyone sees the difference in the work environment. Small changes in developing an employee’s thinking patterns, relationship skills, healthy diet and exercise habits can make a huge difference in defeating workplace stress, conflict and apathy.

This opens the door for pro-active intervention that will ultimately yield more productivity, better performance and higher company morale.

For example, you may

discover your employee cafeteria serves mostly high-fat, high-calorie foods which are counter-productive to quality

Investing in employee in-service training for stress

brain function and overall energy and health.

management, offering incentives for participation in

make a change there painlessly and the message to your

structured exercise programs and providing professional

employees is – we care about you!

counseling through an Employee Assistance Program have proven to be winning strategies for building a vibrant, productive workforce.

You can

Offering free wellness classes to your employees is another great way to build your bottom line. Most community health centers have exercise, yoga and stress management

Looking for tell-tale signs of discouraged and overwhelmed

teachers who would be pleased to come to your place

employees can save your company a lot of money, grief,

of business and lead a class for a nominal fee. Again,

time and turnover.

the message is – you are not just an employee, you are a

Depressed and anxious employees

typically show signs of…

person to us.

• Sleep deprivation

When your employees have better lives, they are better

• Sadness

employees! Investing in their emotional, psychological and

• Loss of interest in life

physical success pays dividends in every way – you won’t be

• Low energy

disappointed!

About the Author Dr. Marino has an extensive background in communications and mental healthcare, hosting a nationally-syndicated call-in radio program for 5 years and directing an in-patient psychiatric hospital. He has also served as Corporate VP at the world-renowned Amen Clinics and has presided over a nationwide network of over 600 mental health clinicians. Information about his Managing Workplace Stress and Conflict seminars can be found at www.TheADbootcamp.com.

bell•weth•er -noun: one who takes initiative or leadership

BOOKREPORT

by Geni Whitehouse

uman resources are one of the most valuable forms of business capital. But people require constant care and support. These books address three important aspects of working with people – how to motivate, entertain, and inspire them to become the

kinds of creative thinkers who can excel in today’s businesses.

Play: How it Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul | Stuart Brown, M.D. Most business people associate game playing with non-work time. Stuart Brown is out to change that mistaken impression. Brown illustrates the value of play in “sparking curiosity and alert observation.” He talks about the developmental importance of child’s play and play’s positive impact on brain development in children and adults. He shows how play gives people distance from a problem so they can identify a new solution. Rather than advocating for a game of Angry Birds at every desktop, Brown suggests starting with physical activities and then finding a way to tap into whatever activity gives you joy. He puts the impetus on individual employees to find aspects of their job that allow them to play and explore while staying true to themselves. Just don’t buy the book as justification for that new office pool table you’ve been wanting to purchase.

Drive : The surprising truth about what motivates us | Daniel H. Pink Most traditional businesses use one of two approaches to motivate their employees – reward or punishment. In this book, Daniel Pink offers research to prove that neither of these methods are successful in the long run. He examines a number of interesting scenarios from late pickup fees at Daycare, to the candle problem as evidence of failed motivational schemes. Once Pink finishes tearing down the old “Type X or Extrinsic” reward systems, he teaches us how to construct “Type I or Intrinsic” motivational environments. In order to give people Intrinsic rewards, he says they must have autonomy over “their task, time, technique, and team. “ By the end of the book, you will want to reconsider all aspects of your compensation and reward systems.

Six Thinking Hats | Edward De Bono Edward De Bono calls thinking “the ultimate human resource.” In his book, “Six thinking Hats” he offers a methodology that helps individuals and teams think more clearly. He uses a metaphor of different colored hats to separate different types of thinking. A white hat represents a neutral perspective and is mainly concerned with facts while the red hat represents an emotional perspective. De Bono says the red hat allows a thinker to say “ This is how I feel about ...” By walking individuals through a discussion of ideas or topics one brightly colored hat at a time, De Bono frees people from their limited perspective and forces them to consider an issue from six different angles. The book is step by step guide to using his methods in every situation imaginable and will forever change the way you approach brainstorming. About Geni Whitehouse A self-proclaimed nerd, former technology executive and CPA firm partner, Geni Whitehouse has made it her mission to eliminate boring from the world of presentations. The author of “How to Make a Boring Subject Interesting: 52 Ways Even a Nerd Can Be Heard,” Geni believes her mission as a presenter is to understand a subject well enough to approach it from an angle that will not only educate her audiences—but will resonate with them. Learn more at www.evenanerd.com.

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

The goal is for you to fall in love with your business again.

Geni Whitehouse SPEAKER AUTHOR CONSULTANT NERD She’s been called the “comedian CPA.” A self-proclaimed nerd, experienced software executive and former CPA firm partner, Geni Whitehouse has made it her mission to eliminate boring from the world of presentations.

Marketing Strategy Marketing Plan and Calendar Campaign Development Marketing Metrics Content Development Public Relations Social Media

STRATEGY EXECUTION EVANGELISM CONTENT DEVELOPMENT

Begin a process of fun work with the purpose of awesome results.

www.dawnwesterberg.com

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www.bellwethermagazine.com/ads bell•weth•er -noun: one who takes initiative or leadership

CUSTOMERRELATIONSHIPS

by Alicia Anderson

he bottom line is this: you cannot understand how to move your business forward until you understand your customers. Here are some good ways your business can listen to customers more effectively, while at the same time creating a feeling of community among customers. Host a user group

Create loyalty programs and rewards

If it’s appropriate for your business, consider getting

Everybody wants to feel special. Your customers are

your customers together to talk about your product or

special, so create exclusive programs and offers for your

service. Offer learning opportunities or helpful resources

loyal customers. Maybe it’s a “frequent buyer” card

and encourage them to share ideas with each other.

with a free gift or product after a certain buying limit is

Encourage them to connect with each other and expand

reached, or new and unique content that no one else has

their own networks. Who knows, you might even get a

access to. Segment your customers to find out who your

great new idea from your group!

repeat buyers are, and reward them.

Start an advisory board

Use social media

When it comes to buying behaviors for your company, your

Too many times, the job of “customer service” is

customers are the experts. Invite your best customers to

relegated to front-line staff – the call center team or

participate in an advisory board. Have regular meetings

salespeople. Social media can help get everyone in your

(quarterly is fine) where you run new ideas by them or

business – executives, HR staff, and managers – on the

get their feedback on previous concepts. Their input will

“front line” with your customers, so that everyone can

usually surprise and revitalize you, and client rapport will

understand more clearly what it takes to serve customers

be strengthened because you respected them enough

well and meet their needs.

to ask for it.

These tools can also help you sell your business to prospective customers. When they see how much time and energy you spend creating customer communities, it reassures them that they will be well cared for when they choose to do business with you. 18

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

INDUSTRYNEWS

by Nicole Laurier

ood customer service has always been a key component to the success of any business. In the past if you didn’t treat a customer well it didn’t necessarily matter because new customers might not hear about the poor customer service until they experienced a problem themselves. With the advent of social media, you can no longer hope

For

to sweep the problems with customer service under a

representatives were being swamped with a repetitive

‘virtual rug’. If a customer has a problem with a company

manual process. Their customers were going to their

you can be sure that they will post about it on Twitter,

website and registering to receive containers for recycling.

Facebook, Google+, anywhere to let others know about

The registrations were arriving by email and the customer

their dissatisfaction. Larger companies with a strong social

service representatives had to manually rekey the

media presence who are watching all relevant feeds can

information into their CRM system.

jump in and handle the problem.

example,

one

company’s

customer

service

They used a BPM tool to set up a series of tasks to

However, small and medium-sized businesses can’t always

automate the entire process. The emails now come in from

be monitoring social media - they don’t have the time or

the website and automatically generate a customer service

the personnel, they need to run their business and ensure

ticket in the system. A notification of the order is sent to the

they get sales. So what can they do to ensure they always

appropriate customer service representative. If the email

give great customer service?

is from an existing customer, the refill request is recorded

Customers

using

Business

Process

Management

technologies report that by automating customer service requests, they are able to ensure that they can respond immediately and automatically to a problem and put tracking

onto their account. If they are new customer, an account is automatically created and the order details recorded. Additionally the task sends out confirmations and thank you messages to the customers for their orders.

procedures in place so that the problem is monitored and

Since

resolved in a timely fashion to the customer’s satisfaction.

production, the customer service representatives

Business

Process

Management

applications

‘loosely

couple’ business applications enabling organizations to

this

automation

process

has

been

have been able to focus on real customer service issues and are much more efficient.

automate virtually any employee-driven business process.

The question is ‘what do

They usually include features like automated alerts,

you want to automate?

automated web content publishing, document automation,

What manual processes

workflow and routing requests, and data services and

are burdening your staff,

integration. They use data within existing systems to make

slowing down response

manual processes more automated and bring important

time, and inhibiting great

information to light.

customer service?

About the Author Nicole Laurier is VP of Sales and Marketing at Fisher Technology, the North American distributor for TaskCentre authored by Orbis Software. Follow Nicole on Twitter at @nicolelaurier.

bell•weth•er -noun: one who takes initiative or leadership

INDUSTRYNEWS

“Begin with the End In Mind.” -Stephen Covey, speaker and author of The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. by Jeff Johnson, CPA and Tom Siders, CPA

erving customers and growing the business. For many people in your shoes, those are the two tenets that drive most decisions. That’s great, but you also need to factor in where you’re headed, right? You will leave your business. It may not be today or tomorrow. It may not be by choice, but you will leave your business. Do you have a plan for that? When you leave, what would that look like? If something tragic happens and your exit is unexpected, what happens to the business? What effect will it have on your family? A plan not only provides context and the basis for adapting to unanticipated events, it also provides alternatives based on assumptions about your goals, objectives and resources that may need revision. Unfortunately, even owners who have great business plans often fly without Exit Plans. If an unanticipated event arises (such as a deterioration in the economy), they shelve their exit plan thinking (and thinking is all they have since they haven’t created a written plan) because their only option is to wait for conditions to improve. These successful owners would never consider a similar passive response to be acceptable in a business plan.

If the importance of an exit plan isn’t obvious yet, consider this: First, according to a PricewaterhouseCoopers’ survey of 364 CEOs of privately held, fast-growing companies, 65% planned to exit within a decade. Translation: there may be a glut of companies on the market which may drive down the value of your firm. Second, if you’re a Baby Boomer, the generation following you is smaller in size so expect far more sellers than buyers in the marketplace. Third, even during boom times less than half of the owners who have tried to sell their business actually were able to accomplish it (2005 Business Reference Guide, Tom West). 20

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

INDUSTRYNEWS

Fourth, if you choose to wait for a rising tide in the economy and the M&A market to exit, you’ll lose control of the timing of your exit, how much and the terms of payment you’ll receive, and even the type of buyer.

Exit planning is what we mean by working on, not just in, your business, and it pays off long before you leave. The process of creating a plan involves determining the firm’s current value, the factors that may have the biggest impact on future value, your financial needs and taking time to consider what different exit options might look like. These are all factors that can, and should, play a role in your day-to-day decision-making, providing one more tenet to guide you. When you begin with the end in mind, you’ll know what to do when you get there, despite the glut of sellers, dearth of buyers, volatility of the market, and the myriad of known and unknown influences on your business. One of the most successful entrepreneurs and planners in American history, John Pierpoint Morgan, said, “The wise man bridges the gap by laying out the path by means of which he can get from where he is to where he wants to go.”

About the Authors Jeff Johnson and Tom Siders are CPAs and partners with L. Harris Partners. Jeff and Tom each have over 30 years experience in successfully helping business owners plan for and transition out of their business. You can reach them at LHarrisPartners.com or (952) 944-3303.

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(800) 822-0973 bell•weth•er -noun: one who takes initiative or leadership

www.SierraWS.com 21

INDUSTRYNEWS

by Brian Kelly

n these challenging times, here is a way to save money, with Work Opportunity Tax Credits. “WOTC” is a federal program designed to promote the hiring of individuals who qualify as a member of a target group with barriers to employment (see Qualifying Groups on next page). Employers participating in the program can receive a Federal Tax Credit (typically $2,400.00) for each qualified employee, which can be used to reduce your company’s federal income tax liability. Who can take advantage of these tax credits? For profit companies in the United States, i.e. C, S and LLC’s can all apply these tax credits to their Federal Tax Liability. Because non-profits and municipalities don’t pay taxes, they would not qualify. In addition, some states have also started similar programs to provide incentives to employers hiring. The WOTC tax credit is renewed by congress every few years. CMS, LLC’s Brian Kelly explains “The Work Opportunity Tax Credit is not going away. If anything, we see the program expanding with the current high unemployment rate, expansion to hire more veterans, expansion to Natural Disaster Zone(s) and possible US Territories.”

Just recently in August 2011, President Obama announced an initiative for employers to hire 100,000 unemployed veterans by 2013, the “Returning Heroes Tax Credit”. This initiative will offer participating companies a $2,400 tax credit for hiring short-term unemployed veterans. The White House also put on the table for Congress to approve an additional tax credit incentive of $4,800 to companies hiring service members who have faced unemployment for six months or longer. Per Brian Kelly, the president of CMS, LLC, an organization that provides a full processing service for WOTC, the average tax credit is $2,400 per qualified new hire, $4,800 for each new disabled veteran hire, and $9,000 for each new long-term TANF recipient hired (over a 2 year period). On average, 10-15% of the workforce may be qualified. If

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

you have 15 qualified new hires per year, that translates into potential savings of $36,000. “I don’t know anyone who would turn that down in this economy,” said Kelly. “Saving money is making money.” Why aren’t companies taking advantage of this program?

situations and shields them from a liability standpoint. Qualified Employees The WOTC qualified employee will be a member of a qualifying group, and must work at least 120 hours for the employer. If the employee works between 121 and 399 hours, the employer could receive a partial credit of 25%

CMS finds most companies are not aware of this federal tax credit, or if they are familiar with the program, they don’t have the resources or don’t want to ask the sensitive questions needed to acquire the tax credits. That’s exactly the reason many companies outsource this function to CMS. CMS performs the screening process of each new

of their wages up to $6,000. To obtain a maximum credit of $2,400 the WOTC-certified employee must work a minimum of 400 hours or 180 days of service for the employer. There is no limit to how many qualifying new hires your company can have.

hire and thus protects the employer from any sensitive

About the Author Brian Kelly is the President of Cost Management Services (CMS) and has over 25 years experience in the Employee Management industry. CMS has been providing employment tax credit “WOTC” processing services for over 15 years for companies of all sizes, including several large CPA companies, across the United States. Follow Brian on Twitter @cmsbrian or visit his website at www.cmshris.com

QUALIFYING GROUPS • Long-term TANF recipient -- member of a family that received Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF) for at least 18 consecutive months ending on the hiring date, or a member of a family that received TANF for any 18 months beginning after August 5, 1997, and the earliest 18-month period, beginning after August 5, 1997, ended during the past 2 years ending on the hiring date, or whose family stopped being eligible for TANF because Federal or state law limited the maximum time those payments could be made, and the individual is hired not more than 2 years after such eligibility ended. • Other TANF recipient - member of a family that received TANF payments for any 9 months during the 18-month period ending on the hiring date. • Veteran – member of a family that received Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) benefits (food stamps) for at least a 3-month period during the 15-month period ending on the hiring date, or a disabled veteran entitled to compensation for a serviceconnected disability hired within one year of discharge or release from active duty or unemployed for a period or periods totaling at least 6 months of the year ending on the hiring date. • 18-39 year-old SNAP (food stamps) recipient -- member of a family that received SNAP benefits (food stamps) for either the 6-month period ending on the hiring date, or for at least 3 of the 5 months ending on the hiring date in the case of a family member who ceased to be eligible for such assistance under Section 6(o) of the Food Stamp Act of 1977. • 18-39 year-old designated community resident -- individual who lives within an Empowerment Zone (EZ), or Rural Renewal County (RRC). New: On December 17, 2010, P.L. 111-312 reauthorized each HUD-designated urban Empowerment Zone (EZ) and each USDA-designated rural EZ from January 1, 2010 through December 31, 2011. • 16-17 year-old summer youth -- individual who works for the employer between May 1 and September 15, and lives in an EZ. • Vocational rehabilitation referral -- disabled person referred to the employer upon completion of (or while receiving) rehabilitation services approved by the State, the Ticket-to-Work Program, or the Department of Veterans Affairs. • Ex-felon -- individual who was convicted of a felony and who is hired within one year after the conviction or release from prison. • SSI recipient -- individual who received Supplemental Security Income benefits for any month ending during the past 60-day period ending on the hiring date.

bell•weth•er -noun: one who takes initiative or leadership

CUSTOMERSTORY

Emphasis on Employees by Alicia Anderson

urrey & Company is an Atlanta-based company that manufactures and sells high-end lighting, furniture and accessories to the designer market. Currey designs are featured in designer showrooms, elegant hotels and restaurants, and stylish homes. The company’s focus on its employees is what truly sets it apart. Robert Currey, the founder, is a visionary whose philosophy is that people are the heart of a business, and an individual’s capabilities are essential to developing a company to its highest level and utmost potential. In that spirit, the company offers unique educational programs to its employees. All staffers are eligible, regardless of position or tenure. Almost 70% of Currey employees participate in some program. Currey’s education program consists of several offerings: • English as a Second Language classes. About 60% of its roughly 100 Atlanta based employees are non-native English speakers – many employees come from Atlanta’s Hispanic and Vietnamese communities. • GED classes so employees can get their high school diplomas. • Citizenship classes for those seeking to become American citizens. • Computer classes, in Excel and other commonly-used applications. • Work-specific instruction to help employees cross-train or acquire needed skills. • Tuition reimbursement - the company pays 100% of college tuition for its employees.

You can learn more about Currey & Company at:

www.curreyco.com

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

Employees being trained at the Currey & Company facility in Georgia

The company’s emphasis on employees doesn’t stop with the education programs. Controller Mike Moran says, “During the height of the recession, we opted to furlough workers instead of instituting layoffs.” The company also offers standard benefits (health, dental, 401(k), disability), as well as the ability to purchase product samples at significant discounts.

“

In the shipping department, Alma Solano clearly summarized the benefits of the education program – she is working towards getting her GED on a “fast track,” hoping to finish within six months. “To me, it’s been great. Without this program, I would have to drive to a school and spend three or four hours a night attending school,” said Alma. “Here, I can spend an hour and a half, not have to commute, and have more energy and time for my job – it’s really motivated me!” Currey’s internal newsletter is an elegant, printed piece which highlights employee stories. A recent version includes a story from a sales representative, who says “I love the heart and soul of this company and feel very honored and blessed to be a part of it.” Currey & Company truly understands that investing in employees pays off in loyalty and productivity, and the result is an environment of high achievement and cooperation among all levels of the company.

I love the heart and soul of this company and feel very honored and blessed to be a part of it.”

Lauren Gold is Currey’s Education Coordinator. Gold started at Currey as a part-time ESL teacher, and now teaches many of the courses herself in the company’s dedicated training room. Since the program’s launch in 2002, yearly employee turnover has decreased to almost zero. Employee loyalty means that company managers spend relatively little time and money on staffing or recruiting. Team member Juan Miguel Mir was recently awarded his GED, opting to take the exam in his second language, English. Mir said “I feel so little, so now I need to grow.” Mariana Leal took citizenship classes at work, and became an American citizen in April, 2011.

bell•weth•er -noun: one who takes initiative or leadership

What Is Preventing Your People from Achieving Optimal Performance? by Dawn Westerberg

sk any employee and they’ll tell you that they’ve taken on a lot more responsibilities over the months and years – most of it maybe not what they wanted or expected. A lucky employer has people on the team who eagerly look for new challenges, a better way to build the mousetrap, ways to use tools to streamline tasks so that they can dig in to metrics and results that might suggest a more effective approach to attaining goals. But often, these employees can be few and far between. More frequently there is a mood of resignation, doing what needs to be done and hoping that things will get better or another job opportunity will come along. While there may be some hopeless cases, as leaders, part of the burden is on us to make the workplace and the company objectives dynamic and inspirational to our team.

performance. I can still remember Julie Andrews’ lovely voice singing “In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun – you find the fun and snap – the job’s a game.” While this is an admittedly corny reference – there is undeniable truth in the message. Look around. Has the workplace become dreary and devoid of fun? Is it an environment of optimal performance?

Leading researcher, psychologist and Mary Poppins (magical motivator and author Mihaly Csikszetmihalyi uses the term practically perfect in every way) used fun to “Flow” to define when we achieve optimal inspire her young charges to seek optimal performance in an activity. You’ve probably 26

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

experienced flow – it’s when you become so absorbed in an activity that you lose all track of time, thoughts settle down and you’re in a mode of complete focus, and you seem to be operating at maximum effectiveness. There is an enormous sense of satisfaction that follows achieving the flow state.

challenge – that’s the perfect environment for flow and optimal performance.

As leaders, we can help our team find that zone where flow is most likely to happen. Do we throw tools or technology at our team and wait to see if they sink or swim? Could an investment in training help to better It seems almost like serendipity when we position our teams to feel equipped to meet the challenge in front enter a flow state. Most of them? Could a thoughtful of us would love to be conversation help able to enter the flow to illuminate a state on demand. So boring process what prevents us? as being vital to the C s i k s z e t m i l h a l y i ’s company and give the research indicates person responsible that there are two a different mindset impediments to flow to bring to the task? state: boredom and Can we as leaders frustration. If we’re enable a little bit more unchallenged by an fun in the workplace activity, it becomes (getting back to Mary boring. If we are too Poppins)? challenged by an activity, I think we can. And it becomes frustrating. the degree to which we We enter flow state assist our team in finding when we are in the Mary optimal performance zone between boredom directly affects the degree and frustration. We Poppins to which we will enjoy a feel challenged but at transformed workplace. the same time we feel equipped to meet the

“

In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun - you find the fun and snap - the job’s a game.”

About Dawn Westerberg Dawn Westerberg is the President of Dawn Westerberg Consulting LLC where she specializes in helping business owners fall in love with their business again through installing marketing systems that optimize fun work and awesome results. She is an Authorized Duct Tape Marketing Coach and has held senior management marketing positions at Sage, Lawson, and Open Systems. You can learn more about Dawn at www.dawnwesterberg.com. bell•weth•er -noun: one who takes initiative or leadership

HUMANRESOURCES

Much Ado about Culture

by Apryl Hanson

uilding culture in an organization sounds like a daunting task, and if you think of it that way it will be. Culture isn’t a set of initiatives or tasks that you assign to someone on

your team to execute in hopes that at the end of the performed tasks there will be culture. It is so much more. The everyday interactions inside your organization and the people you choose to work with as a part of your team determine the collective group culture. Let’s take an example of a CEO who has built a small company from the bottom up. This CEO cares deeply for his people. Often times during the day he can be found wandering from desk to desk asking people not only about their day but also about their families. When times are tough, he focuses his teams on how to get things done instead of blaming people for what hasn’t been done. He doesn’t yell but remains calm, and when people bring things to his attention he listens. If an employee has a family issue, he takes the time to understand the situation and work with the employee on what is needed. What type of culture is this building in the organization? Take a look at another CEO - one that puts strict guidelines on his people about how many family photos can be left on their desk. He monitors the times they clock in and out of the office and puts limitations and consequences in place if people are late. He installs cameras to watch his employees when he is not in the office because he is worried that they aren’t being as productive as they could be if he isn’t there driving their behavior. What type of culture is this building in this organization?

What type of leader are you? Every leader and every employee in a business builds culture. That seems to put a lot of responsibility on the Human Resources team in a company along with managers to find, hire and develop excellent people that build upon the culture. It only takes one bad manager, who takes his or her own approach, to misalign and derail a team and subsequently and entire company. As leaders, it is our role to keep managers and employees aligned to mission and vision and therefore culture.

Who do you have in your organization that is risking your company’s culture? Think about how your developing culture is impacting the productivity of your business. Many of us tend to avoid conflict and often sweep what we consider small issues under the table. Small issues and challenges that we see as potential derailing qualities need to be addressed as they appear so that your teams know that certain behaviors and attitudes aren’t permitted. This is the way that culture begins to develop. Likewise if behaviors are excused, ignored, or even tolerated, the culture learns collectively that this is what is accepted, and this is how the company develops.

As a leader think about: 1. What are you ignoring that you shouldn’t be?

2. Who on your team is at risk for derailing the culture you want to have? 3. What type of leader are you, and what culture is that building in your organization? For more stories on cultures that have been developed, check out our blog series under the “Leadership” section of think.blytheco.com.

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

from Blytheco’s 2011 Social Business Benchmarking Survey Just a few interesting stats from Blytheco’s 2011 Social Business Benchmarking Survey (SBBS). How does your company stack up? For additional results of the survey, visit our website at www.blytheco.com/survey.

The top three business issues that IT leaders are looking to solve in the next 24 months are: Greater automation of tasks Integration between systems Reduction of paper generated 95% of marketers report using a website for brand awareness. Other top tools used for brand awareness are: Events/tradeshows – 76% Print advertising – 62% Word of mouth – 62% Twitter – 62% Facebook – 62% Executives are optimistic. 80% project growth for their companies in the next year. Most (80%) HR leaders use LinkedIn personally, but only 44% say they use it for recruiting new employees. By far, the largest source of qualified leads for salespeople is referrals from customers or partners, with 82% saying they rely on this source for leads. Websites are the second largest source, with 61%. bell•weth•er -noun: one who takes initiative or leadership

Magnets Under the Table (continued from page 6) Dynamics of Emotional Triangles Mary and Jane occupy the inside of the Emotional Triangle and Suzie is stuck on the outside. It is normal for a person on the outside to get anxious, try to change things between the two insiders and get an inside position. Suzie reacts. She yells at Mary and Jane and calls them names. Unfortunately, this backfires and only solidifies everyone’s position. Suzie has just supported the status quo. Nothing changes. Anxiety and reactivity by the person in the outside position only solidifies the relationship between the two insiders. This is true between adults as well. It is even true when one of the insiders is a thing rather than a person. The spouse of an alcoholic will only solidify the relationship of the alcoholic with the bottle if they continuously nag and try to change it. Nagging is futile and only supports the addiction. There are all kinds of relationships that leaders end up on the outside of. The insiders can be: • Two employees who can’t get along. (Yes, they are insiders.) • An employee or group member and his or her disease. • An employee or member and his or her anxiety.

These seem counter-intuitive but we instinctively advocate for these behaviors when we tell a child who is getting teased in school to “just ignore it” and don’t respond. The main point of Emotional Triangles is this: All attempts to directly try to change the relationship between two insiders in an emotional triangle are likely to result in the opposite effect. A correlation of this is, “You can’t will togetherness.” The best chance for change (and it is no guarantee) is to stop trying to become an insider. Rather, stop the “reactivity loop” from the outside position of the Emotional Triangle. A direct intervention must be abandoned. In fact, the very idea of intervention must be abandoned. Instead of applying leverage to change someone, the attention is given to one’s presence to encourage a climate in which others can choose to change, or not. Non-anxious Presence The person in the outside position of an Emotional Triangle cannot attain an inside position. Being anxious and reactive from the outside position is counterproductive. The key to negotiating change in relationships is through intentionally staying in the outside position.

• You fill in the blank. This is called “maintaining a non-anxious presence.” How to Stop Supporting Stuckness There are 2 ways to stay in the outside position and refusing to support So if anxiety and reactivity of the person in the outside position only keep things stuck and prevents real change, what is the person on the outside to do? The answer is: 1.

Manage personal anxiety

Remain non-reactive

Bellwether Magazine | Fourth Quarter 2011

things the way they are. 1. Focus on self rather than the others -You can only change yourself and you have to stop trying to change others. 2. Manage your own anxiety - Self care is important. If you need others to change to be ok, you give away your power.

Developing enlightened leaders through self awareness, resourceful responsiveness and authentic presence.

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Maintain greater health, energy and enthusiasm as a person and a leader Build greater resilience in the face of organizational anxiety and stress Achieve a high degree of imagination and creativity in your profession Maintain personal integrity while staying present and accessible to those you lead Quickly identify leverage points for change in your organization Respond resourcefully to opposition and sabotage Clearly and powerfully communicate mission, vision and values

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