Baltimore Jewish Home - 5-18-23

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The Jewish Community Softball League (JCSL) by “Shimz Cars” Returns for 5th Season ג״פשת ןויס ב״י - רייא ח״כ Vol. 9 Issue #10 | May 18 - 31, 2023 | 8 Over 5,000 Issues Printed | Over 10,000 Readers | www.thebjh.com VISIT US ON THE WEB! WWW.THEBJH.COM $500,000 Raising May 21 st - May 22 nd chederlegacy.com

“Choking

“Approximately

- American Heart Association

2 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM THE CHESED FUND & PROJECT EZRA & HATZALAH PRESENT FREE LIFE-SAVING CHOKING FIRST AID* POSTERS FOR: • SCHOOLS
SHULS
ORGANIZATIONS
BUSINESSES
OFFICES
is the fourth
of
United
leading cause
accidental death in the
States.”
- National Institutes of Health
70-86% of choking victims recovered after receiving the Heimlich maneuver.”
This initiative is dedicated in loving memory of HaRav Avraham Dov Schwartz, ה״ע. IF YOU HAVEN’T RECEIVED ONE YET, YOU CAN PICK ONE UP AT THE SEFORIM NOOK OR SHABSI’S JUDAICA CENTER. FOR ANY QUESTIONS, EMAIL INFO@CHESEDFUND.COM OR CALL 410-653-3333. THIS INITIATIVE HAS ALREADY SAVED SEVERAL LIVES! The Chesed Fund Limited is dedicated in memory of Mordechai & Rebecca Kapiloff, ה ע, Dr. Bernard Kapiloff, ה ע, and Rabbi Norman & Louise Gerstenfeld, ה”ע. Project Ezra of Greater Baltimore, Inc. is dedicated in memory of M. Leo and Hannah Storch, ה”ע IN PARTNERSHIP WITH 410.358.0000
3 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM

Dear Readers,

Staying up the night of Shavuos has always been a battle for me. I’m tired, especially after a heavy Yom Tov seudah, and my bed is beckoning. It’s so tempting to rationalize it by saying if I go to sleep now, I’ll be more refreshed tomorrow and will daven better, learn better, and I’ll help out my wife more. Even more so, as someone who left the walls of Yeshiva many years ago, it’s really tough to sit down and learn for 5-6 hours straight! The refreshments help, but egg rolls at 3am don’t necessarily do it for me (as a traditional Baltimorean, I’m fueled by sheet cake and punch). So an internal battle ensues.

Ultimately, I decide I’m going to go to shul to learn, mostly because my son is not as immature as me. So, I daven at the latest possible Maariv minyan, extend the meal as long as possible (my wife and daughters love that, of course), and finally, take the slowest walk to shul ever.

However, when I finally make it shul, it is genuinely tough not to be energized by the power of the Torah learning. The Bais Medrash is packed, everyone is learning and loving it! The power of the Torah takes

charge and the night flies by. When the night is finally over, and you head home after Shacharis (at a much faster pace than the way there!), I’m a different person. The feeling of satisfaction carries me through the remainder of Shavuos; making each meal, each Dvar Torah, and each interaction throughout Yom Tov more meaningful.

I believe that’s why we stay up on Shavuos night. This night is different from all of the other nights of the year. On all of the other nights of the year it’s not practical to stay up- we’d never win the battle- however much we’d try. But on this night, we’re all Talmedei Chachomim. We acknowledge that this is what we wish we could do every night of the year. We wish we had the stamina, we wish we had the drive, and we wish we had the love.

It’s my hope that the effort we make on Shavuos night has the desired effect, and maybe even sparks that love of Torah that’s waiting patiently to be ignited! Have a restful Shabbos and beautiful Yom Tov!

Aaron Menachem

SEND US YOUR NEWS!

Send us your: community events, articles & photos, and mazal tovs to editor@baltimorejewishhome.com to be featured in coming editions!

4 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM The Baltimore Jewish Home is an independent bi-weekly newspaper. All opinions expressed by the journalists, contributors and/or advertisers printed and/or quoted herein are solely their opinions and do not reflect the opinions of BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME, their parent company or affiliates, and may have been previously disseminated by them on television, radio, Internet or another medium. The Baltimore Jewish Home is not responsible for typographical errors, or for the kashrus of any product or business advertised within. The BJH contains words of Torah. Please treat accordingly. For ad submissions please email ads@baltimorejewishhome.com 443-990-1941 | www.thebjh.com
GET THE BJH DELIVERED TO YOUR MAILBOX! Scan QR code and fill out the form on the website. IMPORTANT NUMBERS Police & Fire 911 Hatzalah 410-358-0000 Shomrim 410-358-9999 NWCP 410-664-6927 Chaverim 410-486-9000 Misaskim 443-265-2300 Chesed Fund 410-340-1000 CONTACT INFORMATION Moshe Meir Rubin PUBLISHER editor@baltimorejewishhome.com Berish Edelman LAYOUT Yitzy Halpern MANAGING EDITOR Michael Czermak ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE AMF Creative DESIGN Aaron Menachem Sarah Fried COPY EDITORS Contents COMMUNITY Around the Community 6 Community Calendar 48 Weekday Minyanim Guide 49 JEWISH THOUGHT Rabbi Zvi Teichman 44 PEOPLE 613 Seconds 15 FEATURES Schmoozing with the Big Cheese: Brent Delman, “The Cheese Guy,” Shares His Secrets of Cheesemaking 58 10 Pro Flower Tips That Every Person Should Know 43 Dalya Attar: End of Session 2023 Newsletter 68 HUMOR & ENTERTAINMENT Centerfold 62 Notable Quotes 64 Kids Coloring Contest 91 LIFESTYLES Delving into the Daf 30 Parenting Pearls 36 Health and Fitness 40 Mental Health Corner 52 A Boost of Inspiration 54 Health and Fitness 55 Tech Triumphs 56 Life Coach 67 My Israel Home 80 Dating Dialogue 82 Common Cents 86 School of Thought 88 Your Money 94 Recipes 95 NEWS Israel 16 That’s Odd 20 National 22

TICKS CAN

ILLNESSES.

PREVENTION TIPS: RESPONSE:

Before doing outdoor activities such as gardening, camping, hiking, and playing, consider using repellents with DEET on your clothes and skin.

Modify your landscape to create tick free zones by mowing grass often and regularly removing leaf litter, moist plant litter, brush, and weeds. After coming indoors, check your clothes and exposed skin for ticks.

ΠIf you find a tick on your body, remove it immediately by grasping it with tweezers only (do not touch the tick with your bare hands), as close to the skin as possible and pulling it straight out.

ΠNot every tick carries Lyme disease, but to avoid the potential for the disease, send the tick to a lab immediately. If caught early enough and the tick tests positive as a carrier of Lyme disease, you can prevent getting Lyme disease by taking certain medications (e.g., doxycycline).

ΠSeek medical attention and speak with your doctor if you develop a rash at the site of the bite between 3 to 30 days after the bite and/or if you develop a fever.

“Maryland is in the top 20% of US states with the highest reported

“Nine new germs spread by mosquitoes and ticks have been discovered or introduced since 2004.”

“The incidence of Lyme disease in the United States has nearly doubled since 1991, from 3.74 reported cases per 100,000 people to 7.21 reported cases per 100,000 people in 2018.”

This ad should be a zechus refuah sheleimah for Layla Aynav bas Rachel, Yosef Moshe ben Chaya Leba, and Sara Cherna Chaya bas Eta Chana.

WWW.THEBJH.COM
The Chesed Fund Limited is dedicated in memory of Mordechai & Rebecca Kapiloff, ה׳׳ע Dr. Bernard Kapiloff, ה׳׳ע, and Rabbi Norman & Louise Gerstenfeld, ה׳׳ע Project Ezra of Greater Baltimore, Inc. is dedicated in memory of M. Leo Storch, and Hannah Storch, ה׳׳ע
PREPARING OUR COMMUNITY TODAY FOR A SAFE AND SECURE TOMORROW ™
CDC's data only represents confirmed cases, the actual quantity of Lyme disease cases may be far greater.
INFECT HUMANS WITH BACTERIA, VIRUSES, AND PARASITES THAT CAN CAUSE LYME DISEASE AND OTHER SERIOUS
CDC.gov, May 2018
EPA, August 2022

Baltimore Chesed League - Girls Continues Their Season Strong!

One of the beautiful aspects of the Chesed League is how it brings an awareness of the multitude of organizations who are dedicated to providing for the Baltimore Jewish community, something most middle school students don’t know about!

From Ahavas Yisrael to JCN, Jewish Assisted Living homes to organizations like Yachad and Menucha. We have Jewish libraries and beautiful clothing gmachs. These programs cater to diverse and vast needs and enhance Jewish life right in our neighborhood. We feel so fortunate that for 6 weeks the BCL teams get to be involved!

We also encourage the participants to look for chesed opportunities during the week, no matter how small. A little bit of help can go a long way!

6 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM
Around the Community
When you don’t know the way on the road, you use WAZE®. When you’re not sure what’s right for your loved one with disabilities, call REACH . Whether you need a school, therapist, doctor, camp, or don’t even know what you need, we’re here to pinpoint the perfect solution for your child – with the largest and most up-to-date resource and referral database in the Jewish world for disabilities. WAZE® is a registered mark of Google LLC. IVDU SUMMER J.U.F OUR WAY REACH This is Yachad. REACH Your guide to navigating developmental disabilities 1-877-REACH-52 Reach@ou.org Baltimore Chicago Cleveland Israel Los Angeles New England New Jersey New York South Florida Toronto Yachad_Universe

Ner Yisroel Campus

Sunday, May 21, 2023

ג״פשת ןויס ׳א ,שדוח שאר

HEAR SHIURIM AND DIVREI HISORERUS FROM YOUR RABBEIM

For information please contact R’ Gedalya Frankel at 443.548.6038 or gfrankel@nirc.edu

תירחש in Yeshiva

תירחש in Mechina

Gourmet Breakfast

רועיש Contemporary Issues in Halacha, Rabbi Abba Kroll

רדס

הלכד איגוסב רועיש HaRav Dovid Rosenbaum

Lunch - החיתפ ירבד with the Mashgiach HaRav Beryl Weisbord and HaRav Boruch Neuberger, Menahel

תועובשה גח ינינעב רועיש Rabbi Yehoshua Magilnick

החנמ in Yeshiva

Q and A with the Rosh HaYeshiva

Moreinu HaRav Aharon Feldman א"טילש

רדס

הלכד איגוסב רועיש HaRav Tzvi Berkowitz

Catered Dinner הבישיה ימ”רו תלהנה תופתתשהב with הדירפ ירבד from HaRav Zvi Einstadter

Refreshments will be provided throughout the day.

7 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM
7:15 AM 10:15 AM 8:30 AM 12:00 PM 12:45 PM 9:30 AM 2:00 PM 6:00 PM 5:15 PM 2:30 PM 3:30 PM 2:45 PM
ם"וכעל הרימא
איגוס
:הלכד
RSVP go.nirc.edu/rsvp
THIS SUNDAY

The Jewish Community Softball League (JCSL) by “Shimz Cars” returns for 5th season

JCSL by Shimz Cars kicked off their fifth annual season at the Reisterstown Regional – by Web Interactive Solutions fields.

Prior to opening week, the league’s 108 players were divided between nine different teams via a draft system, ensuring parity in competition. The nine teams are each named for their individual team sponsors: AMF Creative; Clothier; Donny Ankri Architects; Hijazi, Zaslow & Carroll PA; KD Gold and Coin Exchange; LBSI, Levin & Gann PA, PsychCare, and Worthy Insurance.

Following the draft, teams were provided with their team jerseys, sponsored by Fired Up Promotions. Teams also came prepared for opening day by fully reviewing the highly detailed, First National Bank League Rules and Regulations.

Teams shows up to the fields by 9:30 AM and were provided with league equipment to include bases, balls, catcher’s masks, etc. sponsored by Premier Financial. Games were expertly officiated by a team of highly experienced umpires, sponsored by Miracle Massage.

All nine teams will compete for eight regular season games, with the top four teams facing off in the postseason, sponsored by Mama Leahs/Taam Thai/Goldbergs Bagels/ Chef Dan. The playoffs winners will then battle each other in the championship for the right to earn the coveted Camp Shoresh trophy.

Continue below for some of the excitement from the first few weeks of the season.

4/16

Levin Gann PA 7

KD Gold & Coin Exchange 6

In a superb season opener, Levin Gann held off KD Gold & Coin to earn a 7-6 victory.

KD got things rolling first, scoring 5 runs in the bottom of the 1st. But it didn’t take long for the Law Firm

to respond, as they began stringing together hits, finally getting on the board in the top of the 4th.

KD responded with a run in the bottom of the 4th, which proved to be their final run of the game. Down 6-1 after 4 innings, Levin Gann took charge on defense (mowing down hitter after hitter), and chipped away on offense with single runs in the 5th, 6th, 7th and 8th. In the top of the 9th, Levin Gann scored twice to take the lead for the first time in the game.

Captain/Pitcher Yaakov Rappaport closed out the 9th, allowing one hit but no damage, to walk away from the nail biter with a hard fought, gritty 7-6 win against a very talented KD team.

Care would score a run of their own but AMF responded with a run to make it a 10-2 game. In the fourth inning, PsychCare went on a two out rally, scoring 5 runs to cut the lead to 10-7.

But AMF responded again in the 6th as Reches led off with a single and then scored on Orshan’s triple. Orshan scored on double from Hochman, who scored himself on an Avrami Freund bomb over the left-center field wall. The HR enabled AMF to take a commanding lead and they wouldn’t look back. The game ended on a great sliding catch by left fielder Aaron Friedman to seal the deal.

Donny Anrki Architects 15 Hijazi, Zaslow & Carroll PA 7

pitcher Yaakov Benzaquen got into the zone, not allowing HZC to score the remainder of the game, thanks to great defensive plays by reigning All-Stars Josh Zaslow, Simcha Malin and Hillel Stutman. Still down by 1 run, DAA stacked on 5 runs in the 7th and then 4 insurance runs in the 8th thanks to a bases-clearing triple by Captain Donny Ankri. DAA held onto the lead in the 9th to complete a big 15-7 comeback win.

5/7

Levin Gann PA 8 Clothier 2

Levin Gann jumped out to a 7-0 lead against Clothier and never looked back. Excellent defense, timely hitting, and nasty pitching helped Levin Gann to a 8-2 win, improving to 2-0 on the season.

KD Gold & Coin Exchange 11

Hijazi, Zaslow & Carroll PA 2

AMF Creative 20 PsychCare

8

Showing no rust from the offseason, AMF got things started in a hurry in the top of the 1st. Rookie Mordy Reches led off with a single, and then moved to second on a Yoseph Orshan single. Reches then scored on a single by teammate Shulie Hochman, allowing AMF to grab the early 1-0 lead. Thanks to some walks and 3 more runs, AMF ended the first with a 4-1 lead.

After both teams failed to score in the second inning, AMF erupted for 5 runs in the third to take a 9-1 lead. Psych-

Wearing pink jerseys for the first time in league history, Team Donny Ankri Architects (DAA), also jokingly called The Flamingos by their opponent, started the season with a big game against Hijazi, Zaslow & Carroll (HJZ.) HZC took an early lead scoring 2 runs in the first, 1 run in the 4th, and then took a big lead with 4 more runs in the 5th. All was looking gloomy for DAA as they were down 7-0 going into the 6th.

But DAA didn’t let their feathers get ruffled as they closed the gap scoring 6 clutch runs in the 6th to make the game competitive. DAA Cy Young

After sitting out a couple of weeks due to bad weather, KD Gold couldn’t wait to get back out there, and they let the Lawyers know that quickly. After starting off the game with a couple of singles, Matt Luterman tripled off the right field wall knocking in 2. A few more hits and a few more runs later, the inning finally ended with KD Gold getting out to an early 5-0 lead. Ahron Meister pitched a great game, including getting out of a bases loaded jam, with nobody out in the 5th inning, thanks to a spectacular catch by Gershon Vegh in Left Field. Try as they might, a 2-triple day from Luterman, and a 3 hit day from Mike Holtzman proved to be too much for HZC and KD Gold was able to close it out and take the opening game of the double header by a score of 11-4.

Levin Gann PA 7

Donny Anrki Architects 4

In their biggest test of the season to date, Levin Gann passed with (almost) flying colors, as they beat a very good DAA team 7-4, improving to 3-0 on the year. The scary news is that Levin Gann still has many areas to improve, and they will only get better!

8 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM Around the Community
9 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM GATES OPEN AT 4PM! MDSC INVITES YOU TO PARTICIPATE IN A FAMILY FUN EVENT LEIDOS FIELD AT RIPKEN STADIUM Rabbi Yitzchak Labell, Director of Development 301-962-5111 ext. 1510 | ylabell@yeshiva.edu Rabbi Simmy Merkin, Business Development Manager 301-962-5111 ext. 1522 | smerkin@yeshiva.edu FOR SPONSORSHIPS OR TO SIGN UP CONTACT: ALL PROCEEDS WILL BENEFIT THE YESHIVA OF GREATER WASHINGTON’S TUITION SCHOLARSHIP FUND. TO PURCHASE TICKETS OR FOR MORE INFORMATION VISIT YESHIVA.EDU/MDSC
for your favorite team and players for the semi-
Cheer
finals and finals
Face painting, bounce houses, pitching radar, balloon twisting. À la carte from the Wandering Que Texas Barbecue

Jewish Uniformed Service Association of Maryland - Chabad Hosts Israeli Police Officers for Global Law Enforcement Unity Event

The Jewish Uniformed Service Association of Maryland - Chabad recently played host to a contingency of Israeli Police officers who came to the state as part of the Police Unity Tour and Police Week Celebrations. The annual event was aimed at fostering unity among law enforcement officers across the globe and strengthening their shared commitment to safety and security.

Local law enforcement members and community members, in collaboration with the Chabad Israeli Center of Baltimore were the event took place, joined JUSA in welcoming the brave men and women from Israel. Rabbi Chesky Tenenbaum, director of JUSA, warmly welcomed the attendees, and greetings were offered by various notable individuals, including Maryland Delegate Dayla Attar, Maryland State Police Superintendent Colonel Roland Butler Jr., and Baltimore City States

Attorney Ivan Bates. Rabbi Shmuel Gurary, director of Chabad Israeli Center of Baltimore, offered greetings in Hebrew and prayed for the safety of citizens of Israel who are facing harm.

The highlight of the event was the special welcome given to the Central District Commander of the Israeli Police, Major General Avi Bitton. Each member of the Israeli Police contin-

gent was introduced by Chief Superintendent Yoni Zeitak, to applause from the audience, in recognition of their dedication towards serving the community. The event was also attended by a significant number of members from the Maryland Law Enforcement community, including Maryland State Fire Marshall Brian Giraci, the new

Baltimore County Police Chief Robert McCullough, Baltimore County Police Major Orlando Lilly, and Captain of Pikesville Precinct, Andrea Bylen. Officer Ron Labar from Baltimore City Police NW district, President of NWCP Neil Schachter, and members of Shomrim of Baltimore also graced the event with their presence.

advice and guidance to countless individuals and families regarding content filtering and the safe use of digital devices. He has consistently demonstrated a deep commitment to our mission, a strong work ethic, and a dedication to excellence. His impressive leadership abilities, organizational talents, and knack for effectively conveying complex concepts will undoubtedly serve him well in this crucial role.

As Coordinator, Mr. Dixler will be responsible for leading the TAG Baltimore office forward, ensuring we continue expanding our critical services and broadening our reach. In line with our mission to provide as much technology safety awareness and support to the Baltimore community as possible, TAG anticipates opening new daytime office hours, collaborating with shuls and schools on filter drives, organizing inspirational events and hosting informational expos. In addition to al-

ready having numerous kosher phone options on site for purchase, our office will soon be equipped with Internet kiosks, providing filtered Internet access for those who opt not to have it at home.

We would like to express our gratitude to our Rabbinical advisory board for all their assistance in the process of finding a new candidate. We would also like to thank our incredibly dedicated TAG staff for their selfless devotion in taking time out of their busy lives’ day in and day out for the sole purpose of helping our community.

We are fortunate to have found such a talented and dedicated leader for our organization, and we all look forward to working closely with him as we embark on these exciting endeavors. We are confident that he will take TAG Baltimore to the next level in his new role as Coordinator.

10 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM Around the Community
Stop in & check out 100+ Kosher Wine options as well as a great selection of Artisanal Spirits & Craft Beers 2516 Quarry Lake Drive (410) 486-Wine RubyLaskerDesigns

RABBI YECHIEL SPERO ON PIRKEI

AVOS!

During this time of year, many devote time to study the timeless words of Pirkei Avos. Rabbi Yechiel Spero uses marvelous, poignant, true stories and penetrating insights to bring the messages of each Mishnah in Pirkei Avos into our everyday lives. Each Mishnah includes an insight, a story, and a practical take-away for us to internalize these vital life lessons.

This bestselling author, master teacher and gifted storyteller will show you how the ageless wisdom of Pirkei Avos will improve and enrich your life.

TAKE YOUR BERACHOS TO THE NEXT LEVEL!

Berachos. You say them so often: when you eat, when you daven, when you do certain mitzvos. Now it’s time to take your berachos to the next level.

Written in an upbeat way, with lots of stories and explanations of each berachah, this is a mustread for young and old.

Adapted by Malky Heimowitz based on Make Your Berachos Meaningful by Rabbi Mechel Handler

You will be saying millions of berachos in your lifetime. TAP INTO THEIR AWESOME POWER!

new novel from bestselling author rochel istrin!

Set in a small Jewish pioneer community in an increasingly tense pre-Civil-War border state, Return From Captivity is popular author Rochel Istrin’s can’t-put-it-down novel of adventure, discovery, and the infinite power of the Jewish neshamah to return to its people.

other novels by this bestselling author

11 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM INSPIRING JEWS ... ONE BOOK AT A TIME New from NEW!
OVER 130 STORIES! NEW! NEW!
Bringing its messages into your life.
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Over 150 Female Lay Leaders Convene at Orthodox Union’s Women’s Initiative Leadership Summit 2023

Inspiration, Networking, Growth and Best Practices Focal Points of Event

Over 150 experienced and emerging female lay leaders from 40 cities across the U.S. and Israel recently drew inspiration, exchanged ideas and fostered connections at the Orthodox Union’s Women’s Initiative Leadership Summit at the Sheraton Eatontown Hotel in Eatontown, New Jersey.

Geared for community builders of all ages, the two-day biennial summit launched in 2019 offers participants a chance to learn, grow and network with fellow professionals while learning best practices and honing communication, leadership and fundraising skills in a relaxed environment.

“Seeing so many impressive women leaders gathered in one room to invest in themselves and their communities gives me a sense of optimism for our future,” said OU Women’s Initiative Director Rebbetzin Dr. Adina Shmidman, a featured speaker who also delivered the opening and closing remarks.

Rivka Ravitz, who served as chief of staff to former Israeli President Reuven Rivlin, delivered the keynote address on “Behind the Scenes of State Leadership—A Personal View.” Participants were moved by her personal story of raising 12 children while maintaining her high-profile role and remaining steadfast in her faith.

The summit’s 35 presenters included Barbara Gottesman, founder of California-based BGCoaching & Consulting and a motivational speaker; Baltimore’s Dr. Leslie Ginsparg Klein, academic dean of Women’s Institute of Torah Seminary/Maalot; Brooklyn’s Cindy Darrison, director of Organizational Advancement of HASC Center Inc., an educational nonprofit involved with school-based Holocaust education; New York’s Rachel Cyrulnik, founder of RAISE, a consulting firm specializing in resource development for nonprofit organizations; and Baltimore’s Chana Siff, Executive Di-

rector of the Neuberger Family Foundation.

“The diversity was truly remarkable and it gave me the opportunity to learn about the extraordinary work of so many women,” said Siff. “The summit provided me with connections, tools and inspiration to continue to grow professionally and contribute to my community.”

Collectively, the participants lead over 150 organizations and represent diverse communities, ages, hashkafic views, and professions. Each one is a leader who impacts the community in a meaningful way, dedicating time, energy and funds to the klal.

Attendees chose from 33 sessions including “Trust or Bust: Building the Critical Foundation for Successful Organizations,” “The Art of Productive Nonprofit Boards,” “Effecting Change: Leadership Lessons from Women in Tanach,” and “Crowdfunding for the First Time.” Themes focused on collaboration, addressing common challenges, achieving successes and making a communal impact. Topics spanned everything from budgeting and effective communication to team-building and volunteer retention.

“The sessions were wonderful and professional and I learned from each one,” said World Emunah President Tema Klauser of Efrat, Israel. “The number of young women in attendance was so impressive. It’s difficult for Jewish non-profits to bring in young leadership. The OU has tapped into a goldmine of women, each tremendous.”

Shira Isenberg, of Bergenfield, New Jersey, is vice president of the board of directors of Rosenbaum Yeshiva of North Jersey and secretary of the board of directors of Torah Academy of Bergen County. A first-time participant, she was asked to speak about her experiences with fundraising, board governance and finance committees. Her presentation was so impactful, that participants from Pittsburgh, Atlanta, Nevada and Houston have all arranged to meet with her for further guidance in the coming weeks.

For her part, Isenberg was incredibly inspired by the conference overall. “I was so impressed by the level of seriousness with which the conference leaders and participants approached what they were learning and sharing, the topics discussed and the excitement about sharing ideas and best practices,” she said. “The conference was so successful because every single detail was carefully thought through.”

Assigned lunch-seating facilitated the cultivation of new relationships and professional connections, with women involved in similar initiatives grouped together. Joy Sklar of Bergenfield, New Jersey, and Tzivia Weiss, of Houston Texas, were among two participants who developed an instant friendship based on their shared projects; both are working on consolidating all of the chesed resources in their respective regions so that they can be accessed on one cohesive website.

Sklar volunteers with Bergen County’s Chanukah Toy Drive and Shearit HaPlate, which salvages surplus food and distributes it to the needy. This was her first time attending the summit, and she was grateful for the opportunity to meet and learn from Weiss.

“Tzvia created a website for all things Jewish in Houston; a place where people can find everything from financial help, to food, to help with their local hospital,” said Sklar. “We have hopes in the future of creating [a similar] type of website. I plan to [apply a lot of what I learned] from her experience.”

Weiss, cofounder of Lev Echad Houston, a community chesed clearinghouse, and Kivun Houston, an organization dedicated to women’s

inspiration and growth, attended the summit for the second time, and was equally delighted to meet Sklar.

“It was an absolute pleasure meeting Joy and her team,” said Weiss. “We discussed what may work for her specific community, and have both learned a lot from each other to take back home. We look forward to working together and developing our professional and personal friendship! At both this conference and the previous one, I developed relationships that continue to assist me in navigating this incredible world of chesed.”

A networking room enabled attendees to meet with mentors, including OU Chief Human Resources Officer Josh Gottesman, and participants enjoyed night activities including learning at shiurim, swimming, exercising and painting.

Said OU Executive Vice President and Chief Operating Officer Rabbi Dr. Josh Joseph: “The energy at the summit was palpable. I was blown away by the quality of the programming and the level of detail-orientation that the conference planners actualized.”

OU Executive Vice President Rabbi Moshe Hauer noted: “What we observe and experience in every realm is the immense power of joining with others in shared experiences of Torah study and Jewish activity. Via the OU’s Women’s Initiative, the Orthodox Union has prioritized creating community amongst women who engage together in meaningful Torah experiences and undertakings. The Women’s Initiative conference was an outstanding example of that, and it was a privilege to see the energy that it generated for participants.”

12 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM
Around the Community
A MOVEMENT OF CHANGE THAT HAS TRANSFORMED OUR COMMUNITY. 48 Hours to Finance our Future our relationship with technology May 23-24, 2023 ג''פשת ןויס 'ד - 'ג As technology advances, TAG continues to be Klal Yisroel's address for advice, assistance, and guidance for all things technology. • Founded in 2016 • 20 staff members • Over 2,000 visits annually • Part of the global TAG network To partner with our campaign Visit: TAG23.org Call or Text: 410.873.9750
14 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM

BJH: I’m here today with Rabbi Raphael Schochet of Torah Institute of Baltimore, or “TI” as we all know it. Rabbi Shochet, welcome to the interview!

R’ Shochet: Great to be here!

BJH: OK, let’s get right to it. I understand you moved to Baltimore recently, is that correct?

R’ Shochet: Yes, I had the privilege to join the staff of TI at the beginning of this year. I had learned in Baltimore for almost 20 years before moving to Providence, Rhode Island. My family has been in Baltimore for over 100 years and my grandfather’s grandfather, Harav Avraham Nachman Schwartz, was the chief rabbi of Baltimore and founder of TA, the first day school outside of New York.

BJH: What’s your role in TI?

R’ Shochet: The title they have given me is CEO. What that means is that all matters outside of the classroom are my responsibility – from building man-

years ago. In addition to that, my grand mother recently told me an interesting anecdote. Rav Sternhell, TI’s founder, first arrived in Baltimore in 1951, and a delegation of baal habatim soon came to see him. They promptly presented him with a check for $350 and said “Please go back where you came from. There’s no room for your type here!” When my grandfather zt”l, a local Rav then, and Rav Dinovitz, another rav in town, heard this, they rushed to see Rav Sternhell and assured him he would have everything he needed in Baltimore.

BJH: And is that how TI got its start?

R’ Shochet: I believe so. Rav Sternhell was dedicated to rebuilding what was lost during the holocaust. When he saw there was no cheder with the intense Torah study and Yiddish teaching of the alter heim, he was determined to bring that flavor back. He had just 10 talmidim, and he called the cheder “Shearis Hapleitah,” a truly fitting title. From that point on, the cheder grew. As American-born parents became the norm, the need grew for more English-spoken

what he can accomplish in learning, and show him he can be a talmid chacham. Of course, we personalize things; every child is different. Aside from the standard learning, we have specialized tutors, special education classes, a drop-in helping center, and guidance counselors. The whole staff is amazing; I’m truly blessed to work alongside them.

BJH: We must mention the recent passing of Rabbi Juravel, zt’l. We all know his wonderful reputation, but can you tell us something specific about him as a rebbi?

R’ Shochet: Rabbi Juravel had a special way of connecting with each of his talmidim. He sent home an amazing parsha packet each week - each boy felt his entire Shabbos table could be about what interested him. Rabbi Juravel would include not only a quick vort, but also riddles for those that like riddles, stories, gematrias and facts for boys who enjoy those. He brought hands-on experiences to the classroom such planting as esrog trees with the boys or helping them do melicha on meat. Each year, he viewed his class as the best group of

a major fundraising campaign, is that right?

R’ Shochet: Yes, that’s right. We don’t turn away anyone who is interested in our flavor of chinuch.. We provide whatever our talmidim need,from financial aid to educational enrichment.This means that aside from general costs, we have many other extra needs as I mentioned earlier. Altogether, our annual budget is over $8 million.

BJH: Oh wow! I had no idea! But I guess when I think about it for a second, that makes a lot of sense, given the size of TI.

R’ Shochet: Right – and we are continuously expanding and improving so there is always some new innovation that we are adding in order to enhance our school.. It is a really big z’chus to be a part of TI.

BJH: 100%! Bli neder, I’m in. How much are you trying to raise with this campaign, and when will it take place?

R’ Shochet: We’re aiming to raise $500,000 on May 21st - 22nd, Rosh Chodesh Sivan.

BJH: Amazing! Thank you so much for speaking with us today. We wish you tremendous hatzlacha with TI in general and on this campaign specifically.

R’ Shochet: Amen!

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murder and an additional 20 years for related terror offenses by the Lod court.

Life in Prison for Elad Attack

Al-Rifa’i confessed to security forces that he committed the axe attack with Sbeihat, killing Oren Ben Yiftah, a 35-year-old driver from Lod, and Elad residents Yonatan Havakuk and Boaz Gol, both in their 40s. The pair attacked civilians on city streets and in a park as Israelis celebrated Independence Day with outdoor festivities.

111 Ethiopians Make Aliyah

Two Palestinians were convicted of carrying out a deadly terror attack in the city of Elad last year and sentenced to life in prison.

On May 5, As’ad Yousef As’ad al-Rifa’i, 19, and Subhi Emad Sbeihat, 20, hacked and stabbed three people to death and severely wounded several others.

They were each handed four life sentences for murder and attempted

One-hundred-eleven Ethiopian Jews made aliyah on Tuesday in a flight organized by the Jewish Agency for Israel. They came to Israel accompanied by Jewish Agency Board of Governors chairman Mark Wilf, alongside various dignitaries and influencers. They were greeted upon landing by Jewish Agency chairman Doron Almog.

“Touching down in Israel with a flight of new olim from Ethiopia is a breathtaking moment that reminds us how lucky we are to have the State of Israel as a homeland and safe haven,” Wilf said.

“Bringing these olim to start a new life in Israel embodies the Jewish Agency’s dedication to our historic role as an unwavering advocate for the Jewish people, wherever they may be.”

The new olim will be sent to one of 17 Jewish Agency-run absorption centers for Ethiopians where they will be provided subsidized housing that caters to their specific cultural needs. They will also receive financial support and guidance, Hebrew language education, and preparation for the Israeli employment market and educa-

Engagements

David Lewis (Baltimore) & Shira Schneeweiss (Tornoto)

Shmuli Mond & Shira Baruch (Both Baltimore)

Tzviki Barron & Chaya Sara Weiner (Baltimore)

Dr. Ron Werrin (Philadelphia) & Nechama Motzen (Baltimore)

tion system.

A continuation of Operation Zur Israel, initially launched in December 2020, aims to eventually reunite 3,000 Ethiopians with their families in Israel. The Jewish Agency is preparing Ethiopian immigrants for Aliyah in coordination with government ministries as the Aliyah and Integration, Interior, Foreign and Health ministries.

“We embrace the new olim from Ethiopia who have finally made it home to Israel and welcome the new citizens of Israel with love,” Almog said.

Overall, over 2,250 immigrants have immigrated from Ethiopia to Israel through Operation Zur Israel.

Israelis Should Read More

Israeli fourth graders displayed a dramatic drop in reading proficiency in the latest Progress in International Reading Literacy Study (PIRLS) pub -

Meshulam Zuckerman (Lakewood) & Shira Kreindler (Baltimore)

Zvi Goldstein (Far Rockaway) & Sarah Kober (Baltimore)

Osher Fisher (Lakewood) & Miriam Sadwin (Baltimore)

Pinny Rabinawitz (Lakewood) & Sara Leah Segelman (Baltimore)

Asher Shick (Flatbush) & Perel Treitel (Baltimore)

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lished on Tuesday.

The study was conducted over two years during the Covid-19 pandemic in 57 countries and eight benchmarking entities. PIRLS 2021 was the fifth assessment performed every five years since 2001.

According to the data made available by the Israeli Education Ministry, students in the Jewish state had the worst performance in more than 20 years with high reading skills decreasing by 11% and low reading skills increasing by 8%.

back on track, with an emphasis on the outstanding students and to help the age groups that were particularly affected by the [pandemic]. We have a great challenge, and a great responsibility,” Education Minister Yoav Kisch said.

The Education Ministry said that following the PIRLS results, they were crafting a plan to strengthen language studies and that “the program will be introduced soon and will start already in the coming academic year.”

Despite the decline, Israel still places above the global average –ranking 30th among OECD countries. Most countries experienced a decline with a global average of eight points lost. Only Egypt, Oman, Singapore, Hong Kong and France saw improvement. (JNS)

of warming ties between the two nations.

Eli Cohen’s trip to Stockholm was the first visit by an Israeli foreign minister to Sweden in 22 years.

“We are opening a new page in relations between Israel and Sweden, after years in which Sweden took a critical line against Israel,” Cohen said in the statement issued by the Foreign Ministry. He said his meeting with his Swedish counterpart, Tobias Billstrom, signaled a “change in direction” of ties.

tions headquarters in New York to commemorate “Nakba Day.”

“The United States also did not attend this event organized by the Committee on the Inalienable Rights of the Palestinian People, and we never planned to attend this event,” the spokesman for the U.S. Mission to the UN Nate Evans said.

According to Israel’s mission to the UN, the United States was among 45 countries that boycotted the two UN Nakba Day events, including the United Kingdom, Canada, Australia, Austria, Germany, Greece, Italy, the Czech Republic, Hungary, Romania, Portugal, Slovakia and Ukraine.

Some 5,000 Israeli students in approximately 200 schools participated in the study.

“The data shows the crisis in which the education system is [experiencing]. Our mission is to get the system

The Week In News Some thing S

FM Cohen Visits Sweden

Israel’s top diplomat on Monday paid a visit to Sweden, in a new sign

Issues addressed during the meeting included Israel-EU relations, dealing with the Iran-backed terror, and fighting antisemitism.

Billstrom noted that the visit was “the first one in 20 years, so long overdue.”

“The purpose was to further strengthen the bilateral relations between Sweden and Israel and to discuss global and regional issues of mutual interest.”

Sweden’s previous Social Democratic government had a rocky relationship with Israel, after recognizing a Palestinian state in 2014, a move that prompted Israel to temporarily recall its ambassador to Sweden. Two years later, Israel said Sweden’s foreign minister at the time was “not welcome,” after critical comments of Israel’s treatment of Palestinians.

Recently, relations have begun to thaw with Sweden’s new government. A number of Swedish political parties have called for moving the country’s embassy to Jerusalem, and its parliament unanimously passed a measure urging the government to brand the Iranian Revolutionary Guard Corps a terrorist organization.

Nations Boycott UN Nakba Day

The United States deliberately missed two events at the United Na-

The two events commemorate what Palestinians view as “the Catastrophe Day,” to “mourn” the creation of the State of Israel in 1948 and the resulting “destruction” of Palestinian villages and the displacement of 700,000 Palestinians who became refugees.

Evans said that “the United States continues to recognize the painful plight of Palestinian refugees and remains committed to a mutually agreed two-state solution that settles all final-status issues, including refugees.

He cautioned, however, that the “U.S. has longstanding concerns over anti-Israel bias within the UN system, which is counter-productive to peace. We do not support events organized by bodies designed to perpetuate anti-Israel bias.”

The first event included a wide-ranging speech by Palestinian Authority President Mahmoud Abbas who disavowed the Jewish connection to the Temple Mount and the adjoining Western Wall, known to Muslims as al-Haram, al-Sharif and the Buraq Plaza. He called for Israel’s ouster from the United Nations and accused its government of fabricating facts at a level akin to that of chief Nazi propagandist Joseph Goebbels.

Abbas also charged that the U.S. and the United Kingdom were responsible for the Nakba and accused them

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of supporting Israel’s creation so they could rid themselves of their Jewish citizens.

At no point did Abbas speak about the United Nations Partition Plan that was created in 1947 and was accepted by the Jews but was rejected by the Arabs, which resulted in the 1948 war.

Terror Victim Laid to Rest

Thursday when a rocket scored a direct hit on her home in Rehovot, located 12 miles south of Tel Aviv. The ceiling collapsed in her apartment as she tried to help her paralyzed husband, Sergei, who had not been able to reach a bomb shelter.

Avrayam was the only Israeli fatality during the five-day conflict against Palestinian Islamic Jihad in the Gaza Strip.

Five other people were wounded in the rocket attack, including Sergei, who was lightly hurt but has lost his primary caregiver. More than 200 people attended the funeral, including Diaspora Affairs Minister Amichai Chikli, who represented the government.

was killed by a rocket on May 13 while working in Israel was recognized on Sunday as a victim of terrorism.

Israel’s Defense Ministry and National Insurance Institute approved the measure, which entitles the family of Abdullah Abu Jaba, 34, to state benefits. Abu Jaba was killed by shrapnel from a rocket that hit an agricultural site near Moshav Shokeda in the western Negev. (JNS)

top, with around 320 people losing their lives in the process.

The Dog Did It

Inga Avramyan, who was killed by a Gazan rocket during last week’s Operation Shield and Arrow, was buried on Monday in Kibbutz Givat Brenner.

Avramyan, 82, was killed on

“Inga was murdered by despicable terrorists who choose to indiscriminately fire at civilian population centers,” said Chikli. “The murderous, wretched terrorists will not succeed. Although we are forced to make sacrifices, we will never bow our heads to evil or surrender to it.”

A Palestinian man from Gaza who

A High Record

A Nepali sherpa guide climbed Mount Everest for the 26th time on Sunday, becoming the world’s second person to achieve the feat.

Pasang Dawa Sherpa, 46, stood atop the 8,849-meter (29,032-foot) peak, sharing the record number of summits with Kami Rita Sherpa. But Pasang Dawa may not hold the record for long. Kami Rita, who is also climbing on Everest now, could set another record if he makes it to

It’s easy to blame your dog when you forget to do your homework, but there are some things that you can’t blame on your four-legged best friend. A driver in Colorado tried to avoid a DUI arrest by swapping seats with his dog after being pulled over.

The man was stopped by police around 11:30 p.m. on Saturday for allegedly driving 52 mph in a 30mph zone.

“The driver attempted to switch places with his dog who was in the passenger seat, as the SPD officer approached and watched the entire process,” the Springfield Police Department said on Facebook. “The male party then exited the passenger side of the vehicle and claimed he was not driving.”

The man, whom police didn’t name, appeared intoxicated, and when asked by an officer if he had been drinking, he ran away. He was caught by police around 20 yards away.

Sherpas, who mostly use their first names, are known for their climbing skills and make a living mainly by guiding foreign clients in the moun-

Nepal has issued a record this year for foreign climbers seeking to reach the summit of Everest. Each climber is usually accompanied by at least one sherpa guide, fueling fears that a narrow section below the summit, known as the Hillary Step, could get

Everest has been climbed more than 11,000 times since it was first scaled by Edmund Hillary and Sherpa Tenzing Norgay in 1953. Not all people managed to make it to the

The man was then arrested; his dog was handed over to his friend while he stayed in jail.

The police noted, “The dog does not face any charges and was let go with just a warning.”

Sounds ruff.

Remember to Smile

Only recently did Japan declare an end to pandemic restrictions. For the past few years, Japanese people have been showing only half of their faces to the public. Now, with the lower half of their faces finally seeing sunlight, some Japanese people are concerned

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that they forgot how to smile.

To help them beam again, many are turning to experts to rediscover their cheerful expressions.

Speaking to the Japan Times, “smile trainer” Miho Kitano said, “I’ve heard from people who say that even if they’re able to remove their masks, they don’t want to show the bottom half of their faces, or that they don’t know how to smile anymore.

“Some say that they see more wrinkles around their eyes after using them more to smile, or they feel like their face is drooping because they haven’t been using it as much as before.”

Kitano is here to help. Her company, Smile Facial Muscle Association, has helped hundreds of people remember how to smile.

The “smile expert” gives her students exercises to help them with their smiles. Her pupils are given straws to bite down on with the aim that it elevates their cheek muscles to help show their teeth.

“I meet many people who say they aren’t good at smiling, but it’s all about the muscles, and we have to use and train them in order to get good at it.

“Just as you might exercise your arms, exercising your expressive muscles is so important.”

Culturally, the Japanese smile differently than Westerners.

“Smiling and doing so with teeth hasn’t always been appropriate in Japan, and you can speak Japanese without moving your mouth too much,” Keiko Kawano from the Smile Education Trainer Association noted.

She says she has now taught 4,000 Japanese people how to smile again.

We’re happy to hear.

Under the Sea

It’s been more than 74 days since Joseph Dituri has seen the sun. The researcher has been spending all his time living underwater at the bottom of a 30-foot-deep lagoon in Key Largo, Florida. That’s the longest time someone has spent living underwater without depressurization.

But Dituri is not stopping now. He is set to stay at Jules Undersea Lodge for at least 100 days.

“The curiosity for discovery has

led me here,” he said.

The Week In News For all your

“My goal from day one has been to inspire generations to come, interview scientists who study life undersea, and learn how the human body functions in extreme environments,” he added.

Unlike a submarine, the lodge does not use technology to adjust for the increased underwater pressure.

Dituri – who goes by the nickname Dr. Deep Sea – began his journey on March 1 at Jules Undersea Lodge, a small room that sits at the bottom of a lagoon in the Florida Keys. It is named after Jules Verne, who wrote the wellknown sci-fi book 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea.

For the project, called Project Neptune 100, the University of South Florida professor is studying how the human body reacts to long-term exposure to extreme pressure. Researchers are studying the 55-year-old’s health, as well as the psychological effects of being isolated and confined for so long, by running a series of medical tests.

Dituri is keeping busy. He is teaching his biomedical engineering classes online while he lives in the lagoon, according to the University of South Florida. He wakes up at 5 am each day to exercise and eats protein-heavy meals that he can warm up in the microwave.

Still, it’s not easy living alone surrounded on all sides with water.

“The thing that I miss the most about being on the surface is literally the sun,” he told AP.

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heimer’s disease in his early 40s — he had a gene mutation that guaranteed it, or so it seemed. Scans of his brain even revealed severe atrophying and the hallmarks of the disease: rough, hard, amyloid plaques and spaghetti-like tangles of tau proteins. But the fatal brain disease did not appear until the man was 67.

Now an intense research effort has discovered why. The man was pro tected because another mutation in a different gene blocked the disease from entering his entorhinal cortex. That tiny area of the brain is a hub for neurons involved in memory, recog nition of objects, navigation and time perception. And it is there that scien tists believe that Alzheimer’s disease begins.

A paper on the finding was pub lished Monday in the journal Medicine

More than 6 million people in the United States have Alzheimer’s, a dis ease that has been notoriously diffi cult to treat. Yet here was a man with a mutation that causes the most se vere and rapidly progressing form of

Alzheimer’s. And his disease was delayed for two decades. If a drug could do what the mutation did, resulting in most people getting Alzheimer’s very late in life, the outcome could be transformative.

“This really holds the secret to the next generation of therapeutics,” said Dr. Joseph F. Arboleda-Velasquez, a cell biologist at Massachusetts Eye

The idea is to “go in with a syringe and treat only one area” of the brain, he said.

The man with what the researchers are calling “resilience” to Alzheimer’s was part of a decades-long study of 6,000 people living in Colombia who have a gene mutation that causes Alzheimer’s in middle age. Many have agreed to genetic testing, brain scans

did not recommend any new charges against individuals or “wholesale changes” about how the FBI handles politically charged investigations, even while strongly criticizing the agency’s behavior.

“Based on the review of Crossfire Hurricane and related intelligence activities, we conclude that the (Justice) Department and FBI failed to uphold their important mission of strict fidelity to the law in connection with certain events and activities described in this report,”

The report also concludes that “at least on the part of certain personnel intimately involved in the matter” there was “a predisposition to open an investigation into

“[Former deputy director of the counter-intelligence division Peter] Strzok, at a minimum, had pronounced hostile feelings toward Trump,” Durham wrote, while quoting in a footnote previously known texts between Strzok and Lisa Page,

On Monday, Durham knocked

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the FBI for failing to take several steps before launching the Trump campaign investigations, such as interviewing relevant witnesses, reviewing its own intelligence databases or using “any of the standard analytical tools typically employed by the FBI in evaluating raw intelligence.”

Durham suggested that if the FBI had taken those steps, it would have found that U.S. intelligence agencies did not have any evidence tying Trump to Russian leadership officials.

In a statement on Monday, the FBI said its leadership has “already implemented dozens of corrective actions, which have now been in place for some time,” in response to the conduct examined by Durham. “Had those reforms been in place in 2016, the missteps identified in the report could have been prevented,” the statement adds.

Trump had strong words to say.

“WOW! After extensive research, Special Counsel John Durham concludes the FBI never should have launched the Trump-Russia Probe!” Trump posted on Monday. “In other words, the American Public was scammed, just as it is being scammed right now by those who don’t want to see GREATNESS for AMERICA!”

In his report, Durham recommended that the FBI create a position for a nonpartisan FBI lawyer or agent who would be tasked with challenging steps taken in “politi -

cally sensitive investigations,” including surveillance warrant applications.

NYPD Officers Charged with Stealing Champagne

following the same rules that apply to everyone else,” Manhattan District Attorney Alvin Bragg said in a statement.

As laid out in court documents, the detectives were part of a narcotics-enforcement detail on September 3 during last year’s version of the annual festival.

The detectives, court documents say, were stationed in a VIP area where people at one table had ordered bottles of the Champagne, which is officially named Armand de Brignac but is better known as Ace of Spades because of its logo. (The brand is owned by Jay-Z and French luxury goods conglomerate LVMH Moët Hennessy Louis Vuitton.)

himself as a police officer and insisted that he and his colleagues should be allowed to pass through, court documents say.

The people who had ordered the Champagne confronted the detectives in front of the security officer, who removed the bottles from the backpack, returned them to their owners and contacted his employer, who in turn contacted police, court documents say. (© The New York Times)

U.S. Workers are Happy

Three New York City police detectives were charged Monday in the theft of nearly $3,000 worth of Champagne from a VIP area at a popular electronic dance music festival where they had been assigned to stop drug-related activity.

Two of the three, Jonathan Gonzalez and Wojciech Czech, are accused of stealing pricey bottles of “Ace of Spades” Champagne at the Electric Zoo festival on Randall’s Island last fall, according to court documents. The third, Warren Golden, is accused of failing to stop them.

“Public confidence in the criminal justice system depends on members of law enforcement acting with the utmost integrity while on duty and

At one point, the people who had ordered the Champagne stepped away, and Gonzalez took two of their unopened bottles and put them on a different table near where he, Czech and Golden had been standing, according to court documents.

Gonzalez then retrieved a backpack, returned to the table and put the bottles into the backpack after Czech handed them to him, court documents say. One of the people who had ordered the Champagne saw what was happening, and when he and the rest of his group returned to their table, the detectives quickly left the area, court documents say.

With the backpack in tow, court documents say, the detectives tried to enter a restricted, staff-only area, where a festival security officer stopped them. Gonzalez identified

Surprise! Workers in the United States are happy – in fact, they’re happier than they’ve been in many decades.

A new survey released by The Conference Board on Thursday found that U.S. employees’ job satisfaction overall is the highest it has ever been since the survey began in 1987.

What are workers so happy about? There are two key reasons for the record satisfaction level, according to Conference Board researchers: A tighter labor market, which has meant employees can command better pay, benefits and working conditions; and greater flexibility in work arrangements.

Just over 62% of survey respondents indicated overall satisfaction with their jobs, a 2.1 percentage point increase over the prior year’s

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survey and a 5-percentage point jump over that recorded in 2020. The lowest level of satisfaction (42.6%) recorded in the history of the survey came in 2010 on the heels of the Great Recession.

Among the 26 metrics that respondents were asked to assess in determining their satisfaction: wages and bonuses, workloads, recognition, promotion policies, job security, people at work, quality of leadership and workplace culture; their commute; and several benefits-related metrics (e.g., vacation and sick days, family leave policies, flex time plans and pension/retirement plans)

“Apart from competitive pay, the factors that most influence employee retention center around work experience and culture. … Across the majority of 26 factors surveyed, employees with hybrid work arrangements report the greatest job satisfaction compared to fully remote or fully on-premises workers,” Board researchers said in their analysis.

Interestingly, women seem to be less happy at work than men.

“Despite year-over-year improvements, job satisfaction among women remains below that of men, with large gaps appearing in job security, promotion policy and bonus plans, as well as across compensation and benefits, including pay, sick-day policy, vacation policy and health plans,” the researchers noted.

In addition to women’s dissatisfaction with those various compensation factors, they are also less satisfied with their workplace’s recognition, performance reviews, growth potential and communication channels.

Congressional Staff Attacked

jured on Monday by a man wielding a metal bat who came into his district office in Fairfax.

One senior aide was hit in the head. An intern – her first day on the job – was also hit. Computers and windows were smashed as well. The Congressman described the attacker as filled with “out of control rage.”

The suspect, whom US Capitol Police identified as 49-year-old Xuan Kha Tran Pham of Fairfax, is facing charges for one count of aggravated malicious wounding and one count of malicious wounding.

“At this time, it is not clear what the suspect’s motivation may have been,” USCP said in their statement. “Based on what we know right now, investigators do not have any information that the suspect was known to the USCP.”

Pham’s father said his son is suffering from mental illness and had been previously charged with assaulting a law enforcement officer before the charge was subsequently dropped. He had stopped taking his medication three months ago and was seen chasing a woman in his neighborhood with a bat earlier that day.

Twitter’s New CEO

may be his pick.

“Excited to announce that I’ve a new CEO for X/Twitter. She will be starting in ~6 weeks!” Musk said in a tweet

Musk will become Twitter’s executive chair and chief technology officer, overseeing product, software and system operations.

In December, Musk ran a poll on the platform asking users whether he should step back as Twitter’s CEO, which ended with the majority of users voting in the affirmative Musk said he would abide by the results of the poll but later backtracked, saying he would hand over the role “as soon as I find someone foolish enough to take the job!” In February, he reiterated that he planned to find a replacement by the end of the year.

Musk has faced criticism for a series of policy changes at Twitter, which often came without clear justification and raised concerns about the impact on Twitter’s users.

Musk recently said that Twitter is now “trending to break even,” after previously saying it was at risk of bankruptcy. Now, the company’s new CEO will be tasked with trying to help turn around the struggling company and help Musk recoup some of the $44 billion spent acquiring the platform.

Even as Musk prepares to step back from the CEO role, he will likely maintain significant control over the future direction of the company.

Hot Chicken Nuggets

Elon Musk has found a replacement. On Thursday, the tech leader announced that he found a new CEO to take over Twitter, months after he first promised to step back from the role.

The new CEO will assume the role at Twitter Inc., which recently changed its name to X Corp., in the coming weeks, Musk said. For now, Musk is keeping mum on who will be his replacement. Still, rumors are swirling that Linda Yaccarino, NBCUniversal’s head of advertising,

South Florida jury returned a split verdict in a civil lawsuit filed against McDonald’s and one of its franchisees that alleged “dangerously hot” chicken nuggets from a Happy Meal burned a toddler.

Last week, the jury found McDonald’s and franchise owner Upchurch Foods liable for failing to properly warn or provide reasonable instructions on the possible harm from the hot McNuggets dispensed at a Tamarac, Florida, drive-thru. However, only Upchurch Foods was found to be negligent. Jurors also found there was no inherent defect in putting McNuggets on the market and no breach of implied warranty.

The suit was filed in 2019 against McDonald’s and Upchurch Foods. The Fort Lauderdale jury said both were at some fault for the burns sustained by Philana Holmes and Humberto Caraballo Estevez’s daughter when the hot nuggets fell onto her lap.

Holmes had bought the Happy Meal from the drive-thru and then drove away. A chicken nugget fell onto her four-year-old child’s leg.

“The Chicken McNuggets inside of that Happy Meal were unreasonably and dangerously hot (in terms of temperature),” and caused her “skin and flesh around her thighs to burn,” the complaint alleged, leaving her “disfigured and scarred.”

The complaint said the franchise should have known the nuggets were “unfit for human handling,” had a duty not to sell them, and it should have adequately trained and supervised its employees.

There will be a separate trial to determine the damages owed to the couple.

The case echoes the infamous McDonald’s hot coffee lawsuit of the ’90s, in which a woman spilled coffee on her lap and suffered third-degree burns. A jury agreed with her contention that the coffee was unreasonably hot. The plaintiff in that case was initially awarded nearly $3 million, but she settled for less after an appeal.

In a statement, McDonald’s called it an “unfortunate incident” but that they “respectfully disagree with the verdict.” McDonald’s defense said it had no control over the injuries and damages.

28 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM
Virginia Democratic Rep. Gerry Connolly said two staffers were in - In a case reminiscent of the hot coffee verdict from years ago, a
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Delving into the Daf A Miracle Within a Miracle

Elisha HaNavi miraculously solved the drinking water issue in Yericho. The water there was poisonous and bitter. A group of young entrepreneurs earned a living by supplying the city with bottled water. However, their services were no longer required after Elisha miraculously purified the water. Apparently, people back then weren’t interested in buying bottled water, if free tap water was readily available.

These erstwhile entrepreneurs disparaged Elisha as he was leaving Yericho. They blamed him for destroying their lucrative source of income. The verse refers to these youths as “katanim.” This term generally translates as minors. However, these youths were halachically adults. The Gemara (Sotah 46b), therefore, wonders why the pasuk ascribes the label of “katanim” to them. The answer given is that the term refers more accurately to “little,” meaning they had little faith. They didn’t trust that Hashem would find them an alternate source of income. Faced with a bleak outlook for prosperity, they ridiculed Elisha.

The youths were punished for their indiscretion. Miraculously, bears came from a nearby forest and attacked the youths. The Gemara proceeds to cite a dispute between Rav and Shmuel about the exact nature of the miracle. There were certainly no bears there before. However, the argument is whether Hashem miraculously created a forest as well or it was pre-existing. The Gemara then inquires: what purpose would miraculously creating a forest serve? All that was needed was for the bears to attack the youths. The Gemara answers that the bears in the story would have been too afraid to attack the youths, unless they had refuge nearby in their home turf.

The Maharsha is incredulous! Once Hashem was miraculously creating

bears, couldn’t He create aggressive bears that had no qualms about attacking the youths without the need for a comfort forest?

The Steipler says that the answer lies in the mistake these entrepreneurs made. They assumed that their financial success was a result of their own efforts.

livelihood came directly from Hashem. This is because Hashem’s intervention is hidden in what appears to be the natural course of events in the world. In reality, nature itself is a miracle. Their livelihood was therefore a miracle within a miracle. For failing to discern this point, they were punished by a miracle within

he shared with his wife, a Toyota Camry. One day, while his wife was driving their car, she was involved in an accident with a police car. Eventually, New York City was found fully liable and paid for the damage. However, it would take two years for the check to arrive.

Meanwhile, the young businessman had to find a replacement car. The serious issue was his lack of funds. Fortunately, his sister-in-law was currently in Israel and graciously allowed the couple to use her car. However, the sister-inlaw let them know that she would be returning and would need her car immediately upon her return. Someone else in his office had also totaled his car. The co-worker announced that he found a replacement car for himself. The co-worker’s father-in-law was learning in a morning kollel. Someone walked into the kollel and announced that he had a car he wanted to give away. The co-worker thus had his problem solved.

They didn’t see the Hand of Hashem guiding their money-making enterprise. Consequently, they didn’t see any way they could earn a living after the bottled water market crashed. The truth is that Hashem is obviously not constrained by market forces. Hashem would have arranged for their livelihood to come despite the bleak market outlook.

These youths failed to see that their

a miracle. The bears were created, and their home in the forest was created as well. This serves as a lesson to us, that Hashem miraculously controls our livelihood, in the context of nature which is itself a miracle.

A young businessman, now in the Five Towns, started his career in a job that offered primarily commission-based compensation. He only had one car that

The young businessman thought to himself, “You see Hashem could get me a car in a blink of an eye, the same way He helped my coworker!” The young businessman was shmoozing with an old acquaintance from yeshiva. This acquaintance had already established himself in a different field. In the course of the conversation, the protagonist mentioned his car issue. His friend said, “Really? I have a car that I leased and I’m still making payments on it, but I already leased a second car. The first car has been sitting unused in my garage! Take my first car until the end of the lease!”

Rabbi Avrohom Sebrow is a rebbe at Yeshiva Ateres Shimon in Far Rockaway. In addition, Rabbi Sebrow leads a daf yomi chaburah at Eitz Chayim of Dogwood Park in West Hempstead, NY. He can be contacted at ASebrow@gmail.com.

30 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM
Once Hashem was miraculously creating bears, couldn’t He create aggressive bears that had no qualms about attacking the youths without the need for a comfort forest?

Celebrating

A DECADE OFgrowth

with Rabbi Yisrael & Rebbetzin Hindy Motzen

CELEBRATORY SHABBOS

WITH CHAZZAN YAAKOV MOTZEN & COMMUNITY-WIDE GALA KIDDUSH

6.3.2023

CAUSEMATCH CAMPAIGN

6.4.2023

Add your inscription to a collection of Rabbi Motzen’s drashos being published in honor of this momentous occasion.

Visit CAUSEMATCH.COM/NERTAMID2023 today.

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Baltimore’s WITS Achieves Candidacy Status with Middle States Commission on Higher Education

The Baltimore community is privileged to have WITS, a high-caliber seminary and college, providing women with the opportunity to earn a Bachelor’s degree within a Torah environment. This option has now become even better! Mazel Tov to the Women’s Institute of Torah Seminary & College (WITS) for achieving candidacy as a member of the Middle States Commission on Higher Education. As its name suggests, Middle States is the agency that accredits all major colleges and universities within the Mid-Atlantic region.

“This is a major step forward for WITS,” said Rebbetzin Ettie Rosenbaum, Menaheles. “Middle States is the gold standard of accreditation and

something WITS has been working towards for the past several years.”

Currently, WITS students earn a Middle States accredited diploma through a partnership with Gratz College. As a candidate institution, Middle States membership will also appear on the WITS transcript.

“We are always working to give our students the best opportunities available to them,” said Dr. Leslie Klein, Academic Dean. “Middle States recognition will open many doors.”

Middle States performed a thorough review of the institution and its programs, culminating in an onsite

visit this past November. The team stated they were inspired by WITS’ enthusiasm, aspirations, and “pursuit

of excellence in both operations and instruction.”

“We are so proud of our students, alumnae, and the education WITS provides, and grateful that the Middle States team recognized the beauty of WITS,” Klein stated.

Candidacy is a major step in the accreditation process, and WITS is embarking on the next phase. WITS continues to be nationally accredited by the Association of Institutions of Jewish Studies, and recognized by the U.S. Department of Education as participating in Title IV financial aid programs.

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LIVE IN BALTIMORE: Rav Eytan Feiner to speak on Monday (5/22) at Yad L’Achim event

In a rare public appearance in Baltimore, special guest speaker Rav Eytan Feiner, Rav of the White Shul in Far Rockaway, will be coming to Baltimore to benefit Yad L’Achim and will speak on the topic of

messages you will learn from the villages and their stories are brought to shift your mindset as you head into Shavuos. Rav Eytan Feiner is coming to Baltimore in order to answer your questions, strengthen your connection and bring insight and inspiration. These true stories of our fellow Jews will not only support those who struggled, but contain lessons that WILL shape your Shavuos and guide you in Kabalas HaTorah this year.

Rav Feiner will be sharing astonishing rescue stories from Yad L’Achim and discussing the impact and mitzvah of Pidyon Shvuyim. The

Yad L’Achim was founded in 1950 with one goal: To never give up even a single Jew. Over the decades, this mo-

tivation has led Yad L’Achim in taking on many roles to ensure the safety of Jews from all backgrounds by stepping in for those in need. The most common and well known area of Yad L’Achim’s work is their involvement, rescue, and support of women that are trapped in Arab Villages. These women are in dangerous relationships, with no way out if it weren’t for Yad L’Achim’s intervention. Yad L’Achim steps in. Not only do they rescue these women, but aid in the transition of a new life. Yad L’Achim has set up countless women with their children in Eretz YIsrael by providing safe

homes, connection to yiddishkeit, and reuniting families. No Jew can be left to live a life of fear, and Yad L’Achim has spent years ensuring that.

The evening to benefit Yad L’Achim will be held on MONDAY, May 22, @8:30PM at the Knish Shop Simcha Room, 514 Reisterstown Rd. Baltimore, MD 21208. Graciously hosted by Mr. & Mrs. Mendel Rosen. You can RSVP at www.YADEVENT. com/Baltimore

34 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM
“LESSONS FROM THE ARAB VILLAGES THAT WILL CHANGE YOUR LIFE!”
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It’s a necessary but often stressful situation: you need some groceries or a few items and the kids are coming with you. The kids mentally have their own shopping lists – none of the items coincide with yours. They attempt to throw into your cart enough sugar to down a rhinoceros. Perhaps someone tries to run away or show off their gymnastics. Maybe a child attempts to drive the cart themselves – right into another shopper.

Some truly ambitious ones bring their little ones to toy stores, candy stores and other risky locations. As the child magically sprouts octopus-like tentacles, you wonder how so many items can simultaneously be thrust into your face and added to your cart.

The truth is these stores are very exciting for young (and not so young) ones and their enthusiasm can get ahead of their better judgment. It can be hard for a child to see their desired item as being a problem, after all, “it only costs X dollars” or “it’s only one thing.”

It’s easy to assume children intuitively understand how to behave in various situations, but what’s obvious to us is often a novel concept to them. Children benefit from being educated in the appropriate ways to behave in all

Parenting Pearls

Shopping With Kids

the situations they will encounter, and shopping excursions are no different.

Children can also learn many skills sitting in that cart. We naturally can work on many things including basic counting, spelling and decision-making (picking the right Shabbos snack is a technique that lasts a lifetime). Shopping lists can be drawn using pictures to indicate items to help those not yet literate. With slightly older children, family shopping can also be an excellent time to work on mental math, budgeting, and understanding marketing techniques and comparisons. Of course, this all goes along with the bonding and connecting that happens over shared experiences.

My older children still have fond memories of going weekly to a local candy store. Each week, they would earn a little money to buy themselves a pre-Shabbos treat. Besides the sheer joy of being able to purchase their own sugary confection, my children learned many important skills. Some – like estimating, mental math and differentiating coins – are obvious. Learning how to ask for assistance, say “please” and “thank you” to the staff, and how to wait respectfully on the line were no less important. I only realized how

uncommon these basic behaviors were after the staff confided in me how few children knew they had to wait till it was their turn. What started as a small trip became beautiful memories they still treasure years later.

It took time, patience and effort, but my children soon learned that if they couldn’t behave appropriately in the store then we had to leave immediately – even if we had not yet purchased all the necessary items. It was incredibly frustrating for me to leave the store without everything on my list, but they quickly understood that if they wanted to shop then they needed to follow the rules.

Helpful Tips

It can be helpful to inform children in advance what you expect of them. For example, this may include not running in the store or that you’re not buying extra stuff. Knowing their individual child, each parent is aware of the probable pitfalls of each particular location.

When possible, it’s a good idea to phrase your expectations as what they should do and not only what they shouldn’t. This is because when we tell them a “no,” we’ve told them what to avoid but we still haven’t told them what

we expect of them. Our intentions may be obvious to us but not necessarily to a child. “Hold onto the cart and walk next to me” can sometimes be more helpful than “don’t run away.” Some kids are incredibly literal in their thinking and “don’t run away” never included “don’t walk away,” “don’t cartwheel into the tomatoes,” or “don’t ride the cart like a scooter.”

As challenging as it may be, it helps to keep the guidelines brief because kids tune us out after a few words. Initially, we may need to limit what we can realistically expect from a child. Some children find these limitations extremely difficult, and we may want to go slower instead of giving a long list of appropriate behaviors.

When beginning to educate children in appropriate shopping decorum, some parents may find it easier to start with one child at a time rather than the entire crew. Also, shorter shopping lists can be easier than a full trip that takes over an hour.

It’s best to begin with stores that you know well and have a clear idea of what you need and where you’ll find it. Needing (or wanting) to browse can take much longer than their attention spans permit. Also, it’s really hard to think

36 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM

YOU MAY BE CARRYING MORE THAN YOU KNOW.

1 in ~ 12 Ashkenazi Jews is a carrier for Gaucher Disease.

Gaucher Disease is an inherited, progressive condition that affects approximately 1 in 850 members of the Ashkenazi community. While carriers have no symptoms, they can unknowingly pass the condition on to their children.

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clearly when you have to multitask with a child while studying the items.

Reality doesn’t always align with our hopes. Emergencies or unplanned situations come up, and we may have no choice but to bring a tired or hungry child. There are also times we can do everything right and our kids still don’t act accordingly. Taking a few deep breaths and attempting to remain calm helps the adults stay in control of themselves and the situation.

The Don’ts

There are a few don’ts to shopping with children. These are well meaning but common mistakes that parents make which risk exacerbating the issue. By avoiding them we can help our children have the best chance to be their optimal selves.

We don’t want to bring hungry children to a store. Nobody is in a good mood when they’re hungry, and children are certainly not an exception. Even a quick snack in the car can help prevent a meltdown. It’s also not a good idea to shop for food when someone is hungry; it leads to unexpected spontaneous purchases.

Tired children are cranky people, as

are tired adults. It helps to be mindful of naptime and bedtime when planning shopping excursions. We have busy schedules and it’s complicated to fit errands in between all of our other obligations but, ultimately, our trip will be more peaceful if our shopping companions are well rested.

derstanding and are often happy to help.

It’s best to not bring a child into a particular store where you know they won’t be able to control themselves. Kids are still young, and temptation can be too much. This may be a candy store, a toy store, or anything especially appealing to that particular child. It’s

pressured. When we’re under stress, we’re more likely to yell.

Think of this like an inverse relationship (on a graph this means that as one parameter goes down, the other goes up). In practice, this means the more we’re rushed, the slower our child will move. Similarly, the louder an adult yells to rush a child, the slower the child’s movements will become. We can act philosophical and ask why this is the case, but the end result will still be the same – we’re going to be late.

Sick kids are miserable and can’t be expected to behave. Additionally, they may be contagious. Bringing an ill child on errands can be unpleasant for everyone involved. It can be helpful to take advantage of curbside pick-up and home delivery, when available. Most of our local community pharmacists offer both options. When that isn’t an option, neighbors and friends can be very un-

not fair to a child to put something particularly desirable in front of them and then say “no.”

It’s so tempting to fit in that last errand or slip in a trip when we have a few minutes before an appointment or we need to be somewhere. It’s almost guaranteed your child will not walk as fast as you hope or get out of the car promptly. When we’re rushed, we are going to feel

Shopping together with children can be a wonderful experience. There’s so much to see and excitement in everything around them. Just walking into the local shops is enough to help you feel Shavuos is coming. Helping our children be their best during errands can make even the most mundane trip into a fun, bonding experience. Have an amazing shopping trip!

Sara Rayvych, MSEd, has her master’s in general and special education. She has been homeschooling for over 10 years in Far Rockaway. She can be contacted at Rayvych Homeschool@gmail.com.

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As the child magically sprouts octopus-like tentacles, you wonder how so many items can simultaneously be thrust into your face and added to your cart.
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Health & F tness Shavuos the Healthy Way

Shavuos is the holiday that we received the Torah. The Torah teaches us to enjoy food and to elevate it to a spiritual level by making brachos before and after we eat. The Torah also teaches us to eat in a dignified, respectful manner and not in a glutinous fashion.

Holidays are special times for festive and joyous foods, yet with so many of us struggling to maintain a healthy weight, let’s learn to balance nutritious foods while enjoying this dairy-filled yom tov.

1. Serve a soup as an appetizer. On yom tov, you are able to cook and warm up liquids, so serving hot soup is a great option and a treat. This is not an invitation to serve a creamy soup made predominantly of heavy cream. You can go ahead and make a cream of zucchini/broccoli/ cauliflower /asparagus/mushroom soup and use mostly water with skim milk as the base. An even better option would be to make a hearty vegetable soup. Throw in any vegetables of your choice. Try to shy away from the starchy vegetables and save those for during the meal. Don’t add in pasta or any cream; leave it as lean as possible. This soup will provide you with essential vitamins and minerals from the vegetables, help you reach your daily recommended servings of vegetables, and fill you up while only providing few calories.

2. If soup isn’t your thing, plate a salad as an appetizer. Keep the salad and dressing light to avoid adding unnecessary calories. Israeli salad, or any choice of vegetables with a light vinaigrette dressing, makes an excellent choice. A salad is supposed to be a freebie, not contain 500 calories from additions and dressings. Don’t add sautéed vegetables and try to avoid anything that will add empty calories, such as ramen noodles, French’s fried onions, and candied pecans. Keep it all vegetables. If you want to add a crunch to your salad, try roasted chickpeas; they’re so easy to make, delicious and very nutritious!

3. Not every dish needs to be dairy. Don’t fool yourself into thinking that dairy is healthy for you. Yes, dairy foods

are rich in protein, calcium, magnesium, folate, vitamins B1, B2, B6, B12, and vitamins A, D, and E, however, the good is often concealed by all the calories and fat you are adding into the recipes. Instead of indulging in the traditional cheese blintzes and cheesecakes, try to serve parve dishes as much as possible since they tend to be healthier, lighter, and less calorically dense.

4. When you do make dairy dishes, use low-fat or fat-free options such as skim milk and low-fat cottage whenever possible. Low-fat cottage cheese only contains 130 calories in 6 ounces and has 20g of protein. Cottage cheese is also high in calcium with 15% daily value in 6 ounces. Greek yogurt or farmer cheese are also healthier options for a recipe that calls for cheese. When making quiche, try to make it in individual servings so as not to cut as big a portion. And don’t go for doubles!

5. Focus on the fish. Whether it be salmon, sea bass, tilapia, a tuna steak, or any fish of your preference, fish is low in calories and fat, while packed with essential nutrients. Fish is a great source of lean protein, and fatty fish such as salmon is a great source of omega-3 fatty acids.

Omega 3 fatty acids are the good fat that our cells need and are anti-inflammatory. Omega-3 fatty acids are therefore helpful to reduce the risk of heart disease, diabetes, certain cancers, and help relieve auto immune diseases such as rheumatoid arthritis, celiac disease, and lupus. Eating fish as your main dish offers so many health benefits, and by filling up on fish, you will have less space for the foods you should be staying away from.

6. Enjoy eggs. Since you can cook fresh food on yom tov, an exciting, healthy idea would be to offer an egg station. Kind of like at a bris, you can take orders for eggs. Offer sunny side up, scrambled or omelets with a choice of vegetables. Trust me – everyone will love this fun idea. Eggs are filling, high in protein and iron and are low in calories. If this idea is too much work for you, you can make shakshuka in advance or deviled eggs as a more elegant option than simply serving scrambled or hard boiled eggs.

7. Lighten up the pastas. For a healthier version of baked ziti/lasagna, start off with using whole wheat pasta only. Cook according to instructions on the package. If you really want to cut down on the carbs, use zoodles. Next,

if you have the time and patience, make your own marinara sauce using a light recipe such as something similar to this:

Lighter Marinara Sauce

Ingredients

• 1 tsp olive oil

• 2 cloves garlic, smashed

• 28 oz can crushed tomatoes

• 1 small bay leaf

• 1 tsp oregano

• 2 tbsp chopped fresh basil

• Salt and fresh pepper to taste

Directions

• In a medium pot, heat olive oil over medium heat.

• Add garlic and sauté until golden, being careful not to burn.

• Add crushed tomatoes, salt, pepper, oregano, and bay leaf. Stir and reduce heat to low.

• Cover and let simmer about 15-20 minutes.

• Remove from heat and add fresh basil.

If this option seems too tedious for you, then use any reduced fat/light/reduced sugar jar of marinara sauce. Next, use low-fat cottage cheese and sprinkle reduced fat or light mozzarella cheese on top. The traditional baked ziti or lasagna can have so many added calories from the pasta, sauce, and cheese. This way, you are cutting down the calories drastically and getting the fiber benefits from the whole wheat pasta and protein and calcium from the low fat cottage cheese.

8. Change up the pizza. Many like to serve pizza on Shavuos either for the kids or as a fun treat. For healthier versions of pizza, you can either use whole wheat dough or skip the dough altogether. Nowadays, there are so many healthy pizza options you can choose from. Try cauliflower crust, or scoop out the inside of an eggplant or zucchini and use the vegetables themselves as the “crust” of your pizza. (You might have seen this idea marketed as zucchini boats.) This way, you are ditching the dough altogether, while also gaining the nutrients from

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Sunday-Thursday:

Motzei

ES T 1984

Shavuos Create-Your-Own Pizza Kits!

Comes

41 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM
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patience, make a light to this: taste oil over golden, pepper, reduce about 15-20 add fresh tedious for fat/light/resauce. Next, sprinkle cheese on lasagna from the way, you drasticalfrom the and calcicheese. Many like for the healthier veruse whole altogethhealthy from. Try the inand use “crust” seen this boats.) This altogethnutrients from

the vegetable itself. Use skim cheese and the sauce mentioned above for the least amount of calories.

9. Swap out the less healthy carbs with healthier carbs. Instead of having white flour, white pasta, white potatoes, and bread, incorporate sweet potatoes, squashes, and whole grains such as quinoa, bulgur, kasha, or brown rice.

10. Whatever other dairy delicacies you do choose to make, try to use skim milk instead of heavy cream or whole milk, as mentioned above. For those unable to tolerate dairy, there are other substitutes you can use instead of cow’s milk in recipes.

• Soymilk: Soymilk is produced by soaking, crushing, and cooking soybeans and then extracting the liquid. Since it’s made from soybeans, soymilk is packed with protein. Soymilk is also a good source of potassium, which is necessary for muscle function and regulating blood pressure. Soymilk also contains isoflavones, which have been associated with a reduced risk of heart disease. It was the first nondairy milk to become mainstream, and it’s still probably still the most popular. Soymilk has also become an increasingly popular ingredient for

replacing milk in dairy recipes. It can be found as sweetened, unsweetened, chocolate, and vanilla flavored.

• Almond milk: This dairy-free liquid is made from finely ground almonds mixed with water. What makes almond milk so appealing? It’s one of the cheaper milk options available, and its mild nutty taste can enhance shakes, a bowl of cereal, pureed soups, or even a batch of protein cookies. Nutritionally, it’s low in calories and free of saturated fat. Since it’s made from almonds, almond milk is also high in vitamin E, an important antioxidant that boosts brain function. However, almond milk is lower in protein than soy milk. For those with milk and soy allergies, almond milk is a perfect choice.

• Rice milk: This milk alternative is

made by blending together cooked rice with water and then adding enzymes to convert starches to sugars. Since rice is considered hypoallergenic, like almond milk, rice milk is a safe bet for those with food sensitivities to dairy, nuts, or soy. Just like the other nondairy alternatives, rice milk is now often fortified with calcium and vitamin D to help maintain

• Coconut milk: Coconut milk is actually made from coconut liquid squeezed from grated coconut flesh. The unique medium-chain-fatty acids (MCFAs) found in coconut milk are thought to increase metabolism. Coconut milk is also high in potassium. It milk is very popular in the tropical islands and adds a taste of the tropics to oatmeal, soups, smoothies, and pancakes.

Shavuos does not need to be all about the food. Focus less on eating and more on the exciting two days you have to relax and spend with your loved ones. Shavuos is such a beautiful holiday when the weather is spectacular, so spend time with your family outdoors, taking walks, going to the park and enjoying the pleasant weather.

strong bones. Rice milk’s sweet taste and smooth texture make it a popular nondairy option for coffee, smoothies, and desserts.

• Cashew milk: Cashew milk is fortified with calcium, vitamin D, vitamin B-12, and zinc. However, evidence remains inconclusive as to how well the body absorbs vitamins and minerals added to dairy-free milks.

Cindy Weinberger MS, RD, CDN, is a Master’s level Registered Dietitian and Certified Dietitian-Nutritionist. She graduated CUNY Brooklyn College receiving a Bachelor’s in Science and Master’s degree in Nutrition and Food Sciences. She is currently a private nutritionist. She can be reached at Cindy Weinberger1@gmail.com or at 917-623-6237.

42 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM JUNE 2, 2022 | The Jewish Home 139
OctOber 29, 2015 | the Jewish Home 5
Fish is a great source of lean protein, and fatty fish such as salmon is a great source of omega-3 fatty acids.

Pro Flower Tips ThatEvery Person Should Know

althouGh all cut floweRs aRe peRishaBle and will eventually die, theRe aRe a few thinGs you can do that will help pRolonG

life.

1. before placing your bouquet into water, cut the stems with a pair of sharp scissors or clippers. They should be cut about half an inch and at a 45-degree angle. This will expose the absorbent part of the stem, allowing for water uptake.

2. make sure that there are no leaves on the part of the stems that will be submerged in water.

3. Change the water in your vase every other day and recut the stems.

4. be sure to keep your flowers out of direct sunlight and away from a heat source. most cut flowers do best in a cool environment.

5. avoid getting the heads of your flowers wet! This can cause them to rot.

6. Hydrangeas need a lot of water. They drink through their stems, but also absorb water through their petals! make sure their vases are kept full and mist their heads with water to keep them hydrated.

7. o verwatering potted orchids is the most commonly made mistake. Too much water causes their roots to grow mold and rot. orchids need about a 1/3 cup of room temperature water weekly.

8. When you receive a new orchid, check if it’s inside a plastic pot or bag. These should be discarded, and the orchid should be replaced in its original container. you might need to add special orchid soil to fill the pot. This soil doesn’t retain moisture the way standard potting soil does, protecting the roots from rot.

9. Supermarket flowers are unlikely to have been conditioned and stored properly. When buying them, bear in mind that they may not last as long as flowers bought from your local florist. Look for long-lasting flowers like carnations, lilies, mums and daisies. Check the leaves; don’t buy them if they’re starting to turn brown.

10.

Using the right vase can make all the difference in how good your flowers look! Play around with different shapes, heights and widths, and make sure the flowers are cut appropriately. They should not be compressed too tightly, nor should they be too loose.

Raquel Goldish is the owner of Primrose Floral Design. A graduate of Flower School New York, Raquel’s passion for beautiful and aesthetically pleasing florals led her to open Primrose in 2019. She and her team are dedicated to bringing elevated organic design to Brooklyn, Manhattan, the Five Towns and beyond. Primrose is available for all your floral needs, including weekly flower subscriptions, weddings, bar mitzvahs and bespoke proposals.

43 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM The Jewish Home | JUNE 2, 2022 142 OctOber 29, 2015 | the Jewish Home 44
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Torah Thought B’Karov Mamesh!

At Mount Sinai the Torah describes how, Moshe brought forth the people from the camp toward G-d. Rashi says Hashem and the nation went out towards each other like a bridegroom greeting his bride.

Rav Samson ben Zadok, the devoted disciple of the famed 13th century rabbinic figure and Tosafist, Rav Meir of Rottenberg, (the Maharam), in his seminal work, Tashbatz, records in the name of his famed teacher that many of the traditions associated with the marriage ceremony are

patterned on the ‘marriage’ that took place between G-d and His nation at Mount Sinai.

The etching of G-d’s words onto the Two Tablets is reminiscent of the Kesuba, the marriage contract. The ten men required to attend the blessings under the canopy correspond to the Ten Commandments. The candles remind us of the lightning and fire that was present during the revelation at Sinai. The very expression a groom says to his bride:תשדוקמ תא ירה יל— Behold you are consecrated unto me (with this ring) in accordance with

the law of Moshe and [the People of] Israel, accentuates this parallel between the union of every Jewish couple and our nation’s ‘marriage’ to G-d at Mount Sinai. (דסת תוא בשת)

Others suggest that theהפוח , the bridal canopy, is modeled after Mount Sinai itself that G-d ‘suspended over them like an inverted basin’ that served as the bridal canopy for His marriage to His beloved nation.

(סות ןוילג’)

The Talmud teaches that the ‘primary reward for participating in a wedding is for the ‘words’ that gladden the Chosson and Kallah’.

Might there be a precedent at Mount Sinai for delivering inspiring words on behalf of the couple that brings them joy?

A phenomenon took place at

Mount Sinai when the nation transcended normal limitations of the body and the ‘sounds became visible’.

The renowned disciple of the Vila Gaon, Rav Chaim of Volozhin, in his seminal work, Nefesh HaChaim, explains this supernatural quality.

We are accustomed to thinking that our eyes can sense that which is more ‘real’ and ‘tangible’, whereas our ears can feel that which is less physical — sound.

But that is only true because of our inability to pare away the physical layers upon our eyes. At the revelation G-d removed those barriers permitting us to ‘see’ true reality — the ‘inner essence’ that underlies every material entity and fuels that ‘artificial’ container’s shelf life.

The ears that normally detect the

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Are your children on your

more ephemeral ‘matter’ — sound, now at the revelation at Sinai, would be used in its primary utility to comprehend that which is ‘unreal’ —

Although every bride and groom regale in the joy of their physical proximity and closeness, the true joy that must generate from them is in pnimiyus — their inner essence, and elevated character that defines their true being that is now united in working in consonance to bringing forth the divine presence

If we successfully convey in describing their spiritual character with — ‘words’, [sharing the same root as the word for ‘authentic’ matter — דבר,] we will merit to bring them genuine and lasting ‘joy’! It is only through the connection to G-d of our eternal essence — our soul, that we can sense real and eter-

The Tikunei Zohar reveals that it החמשב — , shares the same letters of It is our mindful awareness of who we really are that can bring us authentic joy!

There was recently a celebration of a Sheva Brachos for a Chosson and Kallah who had been pursuing their match for some time before achieving

At that Sheva Brachos the Kallah’s father, shared a remarkable story that occurred during their years of search-

Some years before, the father, being close to many great rabbis, was able to gain a personal audience with Rav Chaim Kanievsky in the hope of securing a bracha and a promise his daughter would find her bashert soon. He brought his daughter with him, but

During that meeting Rav Chaim twice reiterated emphatically,

Her dad left heartened that she would indeed, ‘B’Karov’ — very soon,

Despite his hopes, several years passed before she met her Chosson,

Her dad was thrilled his daughter had finally arrived at the promised land, but the thought of the unrequited promise from the tzaddik years before, that a shidduch was b’karov, still lingered in his heart. While getting

acquainted with his new Chosson, he shared this story with him adding that it still troubled him.

Mutti began recollecting that he too had visited Rav Chaim years earlier, also seeking a blessing to find his soul mate.

It then struck him like a lightning bolt.

He had been acquainted with her father several years earlier, before ever meeting his new wife, through a common business associate. He suddenly recalled that as he was waiting to gain entry to the Rav, the girl’s dad was meeting with the Rabbi. Calculating the years, he realized that they had been right next to one another during that very meeting.

The riddle was now resolved. Rav Chaim’s emphasis that the match was ‘B’Karov’ was not meant to indicate that it would be ‘soon’, as they had thought, but rather the fact that the prospective Chosson was standing ‘B’Karov Mamesh’ — in very ‘close’ proximity to his future father-in-law!

Our soul dwells in a physical container that often blocks us from perceiving the real world around us with visual acuity. Nothing is ever far from us. It is right there. We only need to pare away the levels of physicality so that our ‘eyes’ can see with absolute clarity that all we pine for — true connection, is right there before our very own eyes!

As we approach the anniversary of the giving of the Torah, we must aspire to regain that remarkable ability, ‘to see the sounds’ — to perceive with greater accuracy the deeper essence of the world around us and its ability, through the prism of Torah, to enthuse us with a joy unparalleled in the finite physical realm.

The Lubavitcher Rebbe always signed off his talks with his clarion call that the Moshiach and the redemption arrive ‘B’Karov Mamesh!’

Perhaps he was teaching us that we are not wishing for something in the far-off distance to come quickly, but rather that if we rise to the challenge in peeling away the layers of materialism that block our vision, we will discover that the spiritual world we pine for ‘is right here and very close by’ — B’Karov Mamesh!

You may reach the author at: Ravzt@ohelmoshebaltimore.com

46
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47 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM O C A B A L T I M O R E . O R G / E M P L O Y M E N T
48 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM Coloring Corner Submission Due Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 Iyar/SivanMay/June 2023 Community Calendar To have your future event listed in the Community Calendar please contact Ads@BaltimoreJewishHome.com Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday Iyar 23 Iyar 24 Iyar 25 Iyar 26 Iyar 27 Iyar 28 Iyar 29 Sivan 1 Sivan 2 Sivan 3 Sivan 4 Sivan 5 Sivan 6 Sivan 7 Sivan 8 Sivan 9 Sivan 10 Sivan 11 Sivan 12 Sivan 13 Sivan 14 Sivan 15 Sivan 16 Sivan 17 Sivan 18 Sivan 19 Sivan 20 Sivan 21 Sivan 22 Sivan 23 Sivan 24 Sivan 25 Sivan 26 Sivan 27 Sivan 28 Next BJH Issue Next BJH Issue אשנ תשרפ 7:58 PM 8:10 PM 9:05 PM 9:12 PM 9:17 PM רבדמב תשרפ ךתולעהב תשרפ 8:04 PM Zmanim are courtesy of MyZmanim and are for the 21209 area. 8:14 PM 8:17 PM 9:22 PM 9:25 PM חלש תשרפ חרק תשרפ 8:04 PM שדוח שאר Oraysa: Meseches RH Begins Kesser Torah Campaign see page 3 Ner Tamid Campaign see page 31 YGW Softball Competition see page 9 Ner Tamid Shabbos see page 31 JCN Womens Race see page 23 Nefesh B’Nefesh Event see page 19 My Jewish Identity Crisis see page 21 Ner Yisroel Yarchei Kallah see page 7 TI Campaign see cover R’ Eytan Feiner Yad L’achim Event see back cover Oraysa Siyum see page 39 TAG Campaign see page 13 [}Shavuos}

Baltimore Weekday Minyanim Guide

Shacharis Mincha

Neitz Beit Yaakov [Sefaradi] M-F

Ohel Yakov S-F

6:00 AM Shomrei Emunah Congregation M-F

6:10 AM Agudath Israel of Baltimore M, Th

6:15 AM Kol Torah M, TH

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah M-F

Shearith Israel Congregation M, TH

The Adas: Chofetz Chaim Adas Bnei Israel M, TH

6:20 AM Agudah of Greenspring M, TH Agudath Israel of Baltimore S, T, W, F

Arugas HaBosem (Rabbi Taub's) S-F

Bnai Jacob Shaarei Zion Congregation M-F

Kehilath B'nai Torah M, TH

Shomrei Emunah Congregation S, M, TH

6:25 AM The Adas: Chofetz Chaim Adas Bnei Israel T, W, F

6:30 AM Agudah of Greenspring T, W, F Chabad of Park Heights M-F

Darchei Tzedek M-F

Kehilath B'nai Torah T, W, F

Khal Bais Nosson M-F

Khal Ahavas Yisroel/ Tzemach Tzedek M-F

Kol Torah T, W, F

Ohr Yisroel M-F

Shearith Israel Congregation T, W, F

Shomrei Emunah Congregation T, W, F

6:35 AM Aish Kodesh (downstairs Minyan) M, TH

Ohel Moshe M, TH

6:40 AM Aish Kodesh (downstairs Minyan) T, W, F Bnai Jacob Shaarei Zion Congregation M, TH

6:45 AM B”H and Mesivta of Baltimore (Dirshu Minyan) S-F

Beth Abraham M, TH

Greenspring Sephardic Synagogue M-F

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah S-F

Ner Tamid M-F

Ohel Moshe T, W, F

Suburban Orthodox Congregation Toras Chaim M-F

6:50 AM Agudath Israel of Baltimore M, TH

Ahavat Shalom [Sefaradi] M, TH

Bais Medrash of Ranchleigh M, TH

Bnai Jacob Shaarei Zion Congregation T, W, F

Community Kollel Tiferes Moshe Aryeh M, TH

Derech Chaim M-F

Kol Torah M-F

Ohel Moshe S

Ohr Hamizrach [Sefaradi] M, TH

Shomrei Emunah Congregation M, TH

The Shul at the Lubavitch Center M, TH

6:55 AM Beth Abraham T, W, F

Kol Torah M, TH

7:00 AM Aish Kodesh (upstairs Minyan) M-F

Agudath Israel of Baltimore S, T, W, F

Ahavat Shalom [Sefaradi] T, W, F

Arugas HaBosem (Rabbi Taub's) S

Bais Medrash of Ranchleigh T, W, F

Community Kollel Tiferes Moshe Aryeh T, W, F

Greenspring Sephardic Synagogue S

Khal Ahavas Yisroel/ Tzemach Tzedek S

Kol Torah T, W, F

Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah S-F

Moses Montefiore Anshe Emunah S-F

Ohr Hamizrach [Sefaradi] S, T, W, F

Shearith Israel Congregation S, M, TH

Shomrei Emunah Congregation T, W, F

Shomrei Mishmeres Hakodesh M-F

The Shul at the Lubavitch Center T, W, F

Tiferes Yisroel M-F

7:05 AM Machzikei Torah (Sternhill's) M, TH

7:15 AM Kedushas Yisrael S

Kol Torah S

Machzikei Torah (Sternhill's) S, T, W, F

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah S-F

Ner Israel Rabbinical College S-F

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7:15 AM Shearith Israel Congregation T, W, F

Shomrei Emunah Congregation S

Suburban Orthodox Congregation Toras Chaim S

The Adas: Chofetz Chaim Adas Bnei Israel S

Tzeirei Anash M-F

7:20 AM Agudath Israel of Baltimore M, TH

Beth Tfiloh Congregation M-F

Kol Torah M-F

Ohr Hamizrach [Sefaradi] M, TH

Shomrei Emunah Congregation M, TH

7:30 AM Agudah of Greenspring S

Agudath Israel of Baltimore S, T, W, F

Ahavat Shalom [Sefaradi] S

Bais Haknesses Ohr HaChaim S-F

Bais Hamedrash and Mesivta of Baltimore S-F

Bais Medrash of Ranchleigh S

Beit Yaakov [Sefaradi] S

Bnai Jacob Shaarei Zion Congregation S

Chabad of Park Heights S

Community Kollel Tiferes Moshe Aryeh S-F

Darchei Tzedek S

Kedushas Yisrael S-F

Khal Bais Nosson S

Ner Israel Rabbinical College (Mechina) S-F

Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah S-F

Ohr Hamizrach [Sefaradi] S, T, W, F

Shomrei Emunah Congregation T, W, F

7:45 AM Bnai Jacob Shaarei Zion Congregation M-F

Talmudical Academy S-F

Darchei Tzedek M-F

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah S-F

Mesivta Kesser Torah S-F

Mesivta Shaarei Chaim S-F

7:50 AM Derech Chaim S

Ner Tamid S

Ohel Moshe M-F

8:00 AM Agudath Israel of Baltimore S-F

Beth Abraham S

Darchei Tzedek S

Khal Ahavas Yisroel/ Tzemach Tzedek S

Kehillas Meor HaTorah S

Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah S-F

Ohel Yakov S

Ohr Yisroel S

Pikesville Jewish Congregation S

Shearith Israel Congregation S

Shomrei Emunah Congregation S-F

The Shul at the Lubavitch Center S

Tiferes Yisroel S

Tzeirei Anash S

Yeshiva Tiferes Hatorah S-F

8:15 AM Kehilath B'nai Torah S

Kol Torah S

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah S-F

8:20 AM Bais Haknesses Ohr HaChaim S-F

8:30 AM Agudath Israel of Baltimore S-F

Machzikei Torah (Sternhill's) S-F

Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah S-F

Ohel Moshe S

Ohr Hamizrach [Sefaradi] S

Shomrei Emunah Congregation S-F

Shomrei Mishmeres Hakodesh S

8:45 AM Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah S-F

9:00 AM Aish Kodesh S

Agudath Israel of Baltimore S-F

Bais Haknesses Ohr HaChaim S

Beth Tfiloh Congregation S

Bnai Jacob Shaarei Zion Congregation S

Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah S-F

Shomrei Emunah Congregation S-F

Suburban Orthodox Congregation Toras Chaim S-F

9:15 AM Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah S-F

9:30 AM Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah S-F

9:45 AM Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah S-F

10:00AM Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah S-F

Mincha Gedolah Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah

Khal Ahavas Yisroel/Tzemach Tzedek

1:45 PM Ohel Moshe

1:50 PM Bais Haknesses Ohr HaChaim

Neuberger, Quinn, Gielen, Rubin & Gibber

2:00 PM Agudath Israel of Baltimore

Big Al @ The Knish Shop Party Room

Kol Torah

Market Maven

Reischer Minyan 15 Walker Ave 2nd Floor

2:30 PM Bais Medrash of Ranchleigh

Ner Israel Rabbinical College

Tov Pizza Mincha Minyan

Community Kollel Tiferes Moshe Aryeh

Mesivta Shaarei Chaim (Etz Chaim Building)

Shearith Israel Congregation

3:00 PM Agudath Israel of Baltimore

Bais Haknesses Ohr HaChaim

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah

3:05 PM Kedushas Yisrael

3:15 PM Hat Box

4:00 PM Agudath Israel of Baltimore

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah

5:00 PM Agudath Israel of Baltimore

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah

5:30 PM Agudath Israel of Baltimore

6:00 PM Kedushas Yisrael

Agudath Israel of Baltimore

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah

7:00 PM Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah

14 Min Before ShkiAh Kol Torah

Mincha/Maariv Before Shkiah

Aish Kodesh

Agudath Israel of Baltimore

Agudah of Greenspring

Bais Haknesses Ohr HaChaim

Beth Abraham

Bnai Jacob Shaarei Zion Congregation

Darchei Tzedek

Kehillas Meor HaTorah

Kehilath B’nai Torah

Khal Ahavas Yisroel/ Tzemach Tzedek

Machzikei Torah (Sternhill’s)

Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah

Ner Tamid

Ohel Moshe

Ohr Hamizrach [Sefaradi]

Ohr Yisroel

Pikesville Jewish Congregation

Shearith Israel Congregation

Shomrei Emunah Congregation

Shomrei Mishmeres

Suburban Orthodox Congregation Toras Chaim

The Adas: Chofetz Chaim Adas Bnei Israel

The Shul at the Lubavitch Center

Tiferes Yisroel

Maariv

7:45 PM Talmudical Academy

8:00 PM Agudath Israel of Baltimore

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah

8:10 PM Kol Torah

8:15 PM Khal Ahavas Yisroel/ Tzemach Tzedek

Shomrei Emunah Congregation

8:30 PM Agudath Israel of Baltimore

Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah

8:45 PM Darchei Tzedek

Ner Israel Rabbinical College (Mechina)

Ohr Yisroel

Maariv continued

9:00 PM Agudath Israel of Baltimore

Arugas Habosem

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah

Shomrei Emunah Congregation

Suburban Orthodox Congregation Toras Chaim

9:20 PM Kol Torah

9:30 PM Agudah of Greenspring

Agudath Israel of Baltimore

Kedushas Yisrael

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah

9:40 PM Ahavat Shalom [Sefaradi]

9:45 PM Bais Haknesses Ohr HaChaim

Kollel Erev Birchas Yitzchok (Luries)

Machzikei Torah (Sternhill's)

Ohr Hamizrach [Sefaradi]

Yeshiva Tiferes Hatorah

9:50 PM Aish Kodesh

Community Kollel Tiferes Moshe Aryeh

Ohel Moshe

10:00 PM Agudath Israel of Baltimore

Darchei Tzedek

Kehilath B'nai Torah

Khal Ahavas Yisroel/ Tzemach Tzedek

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah

Shearith Israel Congregation

Shomrei Emunah Congregation

10:05 PM Kol Torah

10:10 PM Ner Israel Rabbinical College

10:15 PM Derech Chaim

Khal Bais Nosson

10:30 PM Agudath Israel of Baltimore

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah

11:00 PM Agudath Israel of Baltimore

Mercaz Torah U'Tefillah

Agudah of Greenspring - 6107 Greenspring Ave

Agudath Israel of Baltimore - 6200 Park Heights Ave

Ahavat Shalom - 3009 Northbrook Rd

Aish Kodesh - 6207 Ivymount Rd

Arugas HaBosem - 3509 Cwlarks Ln

Bais Haknesses Ohr HaChaim - 3120 Clarks Ln

Bais Hamedrash and Mesivta of Baltimore - 6823 Old Pimlico Rd

Bais Medrash of Ranchleigh - 6618 Deancroft Rd

Beit Yaakov - 3615 Seven Mile Ln

Beth Abraham - 6208 Wallis Ave

Beth Tfiloh Congregation - 3300 Old Court Rd

Bnai Jacob Shaarei Zion Congregation - 6602 Park Heights Ave

Chabad of Park Heights - 3402 Clarks Ln

Community Kollel Tiferes Moshe Aryeh - 3800 Labyrinth Rd

Darchei Tzedek - 3201 Seven Mile Ln

Derech Chaim - 6229 Greenspring Ave (Weekday)

Greenspring Sephardic Synagogue 6611 Greenspring Ave.

Kedushas Yisrael - 6004 Park Heights Ave

Kehilath B’nai Torah - 6301 Green Meadow Pkwy

Kehillas Meor HaTorah - 6539 Pebble Brooke Rd

Khal Ahavas Yisroel/ Tzemach Tzedek - 6811 Park Heights Ave

Khal Bais Nosson - 2901 Taney Rd

Kol Torah - 2929 Fallstaff Rd

Machzikei Torah - 6216 Biltmore Ave

Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah - 6500 Baythorne Rd

Mesivta Kesser Torah - 8400 Park Heights Ave

Mesivta Shaarei Chaim - 3702 Fords Ln

Moses Montefiore Anshe Emunah - 7000 Rockland Hills Dr

Neuberger, Quinn, Gielen, Rubin & Gibber One South Street, 27th Floor

Ner Israel Rabbinical College - 400 Mt Wilson Ln

Ner Tamid - 6214 Pimlico Road

Ohel Moshe - 2808 Smith Ave

Ohel Yakov - 3200 Glen Ave

Ohr Hamizrach [Sefaradi] - 6813 Park Heights Ave

Ohr Yisroel - 2429 Lightfoot Dr

Pikesville Jewish Congregation - 7644 Carla Rd

Shearith Israel Congregation - 5835 Park Heights Ave

Shomrei Emunah Congregation - 6221 Greenspring Ave

Shomrei Mishmeres Hakodesh - 2821 W Strathmore Ave

Suburban Orthodox Congregation Toras Chaim - 7504 Seven Mile Ln

Talmudical Academy - 4445 Old Court Rd

The Adas: Chofetz Chaim Adas Bnei Israel - 5915 Park Heights Ave

The Shul at the Lubavitch Center - 6701 Old Pimlico Rd

Tiferes Yisroel - 6201 Park Heights Ave

Tzeirei Anash - 6706 Cross County Blvd

Yeshiva Tiferes Hatorah - 6819 Williamson Ave

49 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM
Mesivta
PM Community Kollel Tiferes Moshe Aryeh
8:50 PM
Shaarei Chaim (Etz Chaim Building) 8:55
For edits,
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Mental Health Corner

The Dangers of Complacency

Addiction is a disease that wreaks havoc on the lives of the addicts and their loved ones. After an addict has successfully reached sobriety, the question is often asked if that means that the addiction is cured. The short answer is… No. Addiction cannot be cured, but it can be managed.

Imagine someone who had very poor dental hygiene habits and after a few painful toothaches he goes to a dentist who informs him that he needs five root canals. Do we say that after his teeth are repaired that he is cured? Of course not! We say that from now on it is imperative to be proactive in the care of his teeth.

Similarly with addictions, one cannot just sit back and feel that from now on life will be smooth sailing. The road to relapse is a slippery one, and only through being on top of your game, will you be able to avoid it.

This gets us to the difference be-

tween complacency and confidence. Complacency is “a feeling of smug or uncritical satisfaction with oneself or one’s achievements”, and confidence is “a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities”. If you will notice, there is a fine line between being complacent and being confident. When one is confident in recovery, that means that one has developed the necessary habits to maintain recovery and therefore feels confident in his or her ability to avoid relapse. When one is complacent in recovery that means that one is so satisfied with his or her accomplishments in recovery that one feels immune from the risks of relapse.

What are some the signs of complacency? One is if you are always saying that you do not have time to engage in recovery habits. Someone who achieved recovery through support groups, therapy, and having a sponsor, and now has no time to maintain those recovery hab-

its has become complacent. Life is busy, and we all often have a very difficult time making space in our lives for the myriad responsibilities that we all have. But maintaining recovery is not simply just another obligation on the list. This is what you need to avoid relapse which can trigger a downward spiral that can lead to the loss of one’s job, marriage, or life.

Another sign of complacency is if one stops taking advice. Humility is an integral component of maintaining recovery. If one is focused on remaining sober, then he or she would be actively seeking out advice from other addicts in recovery or from professionals. When you are no longer teachable, that is a surefire sign that you are overconfident.

In order to stay one step ahead of the relapse trap, one must be take the initiative and actively seek out ways to continue growing in recovery. Pick up the phone and connect with people who have similar struggles. Join support

groups of likeminded individuals who want to help one another in the lifelong journey of recovery. Be accountable to somebody else who will call you out if you slack off on your recovery practices. Seek out the services of a mental health professional who has experience in the treatment of addictions.

There are so many resources out there today for addicts in recovery. If you are fully aware of your need to be proactive in recovery and you maintain a wide spectrum of healthy habits of recovery, then you might have the right to feel confident about your recovery. But, never, ever, feel complacent.

This is a service of Relief Resources. Relief is an organization that provides mental health referrals, education, and support to the frum community. Rabbi Yisrael Slansky is director of the Baltimore branch of Relief. He can be contacted at 410-448-8356 or at yslansky@ reliefhelp.org

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THE BJH PRESENTS: A BOOST OF “INSPIRATION”

A Snippet From Judaism’s Number One Podcast

THE BJH PRESENTS... A BOOST OF “INSPIRATION”

Reb Aharon Kotler: How R’ Aharon Kotler Built The Largest Jewish Institution in the US ELI PALEY CEO OF MISHPACHA

abbi Aaron Kotler was the president of the Beth Medrash Govoha (BMG), also known as the Lakewood Yeshiva. BMG has some 7,000 students and 13,000 alumni, many of whom are leaders and builders of Jewish communities worldwide. The yeshiva is the engine of growth for the community of Lakewood, N.J., helping it leap to one of the largest municipalities in New Jersey. As Lakewood has grown, Rabbi Kotler has been active in public policy matters, serving on various boards devoted to the expansion of regional health care, transportation, housing, education, and economic development. He is the son of Rav Shneur Kotler zt”l and grandson of Rav Aharon Kotler zt”l who formed Lakewood’s Beth Medrash Govoha in 1943.

RIn our interconnected world, the power of the media cannot be overestimated. Internet websites, social media, radio, newspapers, and magazines increasingly control the fate of politicians and governments, world finances and morality. In the chareidi world, the messages conveyed by religious media can shape and strengthen emuna, enrich charitable efforts, and ferment new shul and yeshiva policies. Therefore, it was a great privilege to interview the highly influential Rabbi Eli Paley, owner of Mishpacha Media Group and publisher of the Mishpacha Hebrew and English weekly magazines.

Aish encouraged him to teach at Aish. He has no regrets as he was blessed to have a kesher with Reb Noach.

Eli Paley is a businessman and social activist. He is chairman of the Paley Family Foundation which supports and promotes Torah Centers and social initiatives in the Charedi community. A member of the Jewish Funders Network, he is active in several philanthropic organizations.

We discussed the Mishpacha’s origin, the challenges he is faced with policy decision making, and the overall goals he hopes to attain through the publication.

Eli was born in in the Mattesdorff neighborhood in Yerushalayim. His great-grandfather and grandfather arrived in Eretz Yisroel in 1925 to establish the Slabodka Yeshivah in Chevron. Later his grandfather became the assistant to Rabbi Herzel, the chief rabbi of Israel.

After teaching for a year, he felt he didn’t know enough so he quit teaching, sold everything, and moved from Israel back to the United States to learn in a new Kollel in South Fallsburg and he stayed there for about 5 years.

Eli himself is an alumni of Chevron yeshiva. When he married his wife, a graduate of Michlala in Bayit Vegan, his dream was to continue learning. However, a few months after his marriage, his brother mentioned a new monthly publication called Mishpacha was looking for someone to work as a distributor in Yerushalayim for a day and a half once every 5 to 6 weeks. With flex hours like that, Eli took the job, earning twice as much as he would be for an entire month in a kolel. Financially independent, he continued to learn diligently.

Rabbi Kotler says that when he was growing up in Lakewood, he always knew that his family was different from the Jewish culture. The neighborhood was not all frum, but they knew that their religious world was somewhat different from the world at large.

His father, Rabbi Yehuda Paley, bought the Mishpacha Magazine business. To help his father, Eli got involved in the editorial angle of the magazine figuring out how it could make a unique contribution to the field of journalism. He left learning to pursue his new mission to inspire and influence the Chareidi community. It is that idealism that still drives him in his work so many years later.

However, Lakewood was a small community, everyone knew each other, and there was a sense of familiarity and warmth in the community. His parents were not distant figures and their home was not some kind of sacred home. It was an open home, with both religious and non-religious people coming in. Everyone had a tremendous sense of closeness and warmth for his parents.

While Mishpacha is well-received around the world, the goal of Mishpacha is to serve, elevate and be the voice of the Chareidim, particularly in Eretz Yisroel. The real customers are not the advertisers but the audience. Mishpacha seeks to portray an independent voice which is unaffiliated with any political party. In the early years, in the chareidi world of pollicization, this was perceived as a weakness. However, the years have passed, and this freedom has become one of the most salient factors of its success.

While in South Fallsburg he was able to do kiruv and learn at the same time. Most locals in the Catskills were of Russian Jewish descent and still identified as orthodox even though they were not religious they were all interested in learning. He did a lot of kiruv work together with the wonderful Rabbonim in the Catskills and the conservative and reform rabbis were also sympathetic and allowed them to do kiruv.

Mishpacha was the first Charedi publication to give the same respect to the Sephardi and Ashkenazi societies, attempting to create a sense of unity. Over time, this adherence to equality and ahavas Yisrael became the secret to the business’ success.

Mishpacha’s quest in elevating frum society is done through sincere, honest writing. Mishpacha does not engage in pretending that society is perfect. While recognizing the great achievements and accomplishments in the frum world, Mishpacha will tackle even unpleasant issues, albeit in an extremely sensitive way.

Rabbi Kotler went to Israel as a bochur. He then came back to Lakewood and learned in BMG. After he got married, he moved back to Israel. A close friend who was a Rabbi at

In 1995 his family asked him to return to Lakewood and get involved in BMG. He relates that he’d always loved Lakewood, and although South Fallsburg was like a little piece of Gan Eden, Lakewood is also beautiful. It wasn’t a city yet. He feels it was the right move to make as at the time Lakewood was struggling and growing rapidly and he had the opportunity to work with his family on strengthening it. He also could not say no to his family.

More?

The topic of poverty among Charedim and the poor economic situation in the Israeli community lay heavily on Eli’s heart. As part of the solution, Eli started the Charedi Institute of Public Affairs to engage with the government with hopes to resolve this in a way that will allow the Charedi society to retain its Torah values.

Seeing the vibrant and flourishing frum Lakewood Jewish community is a joy. He says seeing Jews together how could you not have joy when you think of how all of Europe was virtually wiped out? Having to wait in line at a kosher restaurant is a brocha. We live in the best time in Jewish history with all amenities and kosher food and yeshivas, you can wear your yarmulke in the street, people are respectful, and the norm is that you can live as a frum Jew.

While American Jews may have difficulty in relating to the issues overseas, Eli, as a born and bred Israeli is certainly in touch with the masses. He recalls the issue he faced during his kolel years when distributing the magazine. The government regulation forbid a yingeman from receiving Kollel benefits if he had any other source of income. Therefore, he was forced to register his side job under his wife’s name, a desperate solution used by many. In his publication, he attempts to broker a better solution.

Another example of difficulties that Israeli chareidim face is the draft. Mishpacha discussed population statistics -- one out of four children is Charedi– and how the army and Charedi society can possibly reach a solution.

If he’d had an understanding of all the challenges, he might have re fused to get involved but at the time he couldn’t understand why more peo ple didn’t believe in it. That was the puzzle; if he could crack it, it would work. If a climate is friendly it will garner support but he feels there was insufficient love and a feeling of connection to those who are learning and the Torah mission.

The paper is faced daily with Hashkafa decisions that have far-reaching effects on our society. The issue of printing pictures of women in the magazine has been debated back and forth in many forums. When Hilary Clinton was running for President, Mishpacha shocked many readers by publishing a blurry photo of Donald Trump and Hilary on the cover. “We just wanted to see how people would react,” Eli confides.

Regarding the Challenges in the frum community, Rabbi Kotler says that individuals with a real passion for Yiddishkeit should be the norm but unfortunately, it is not. We should feel passion every day. We have commitment and sacrifice, but not always enough passion. If we had more directed passion, we would have more joy and people wouldn’t be so unhappy.

In the 70s and 80s, the US wasn’t the friendliest place to learn Torah in contrast with today where hundreds of balei batim have come to Lakewood from Argentina and Mexico for a few weeks to learn for several hours a day. They don’t have any issues with connection with Torah. If you’re learning and living it, you have no issues.

This became a real issue because it was very hard for Eli to justify in his mind why they could not print modest pictures of women, particularly considering how hard it seems to be to explain to ba’alei teshuvah why women are “ignored.” In order to make Mishpacha, often one of their first exposures to Yiddishkeit, more palatable, Eli is comfortable with his decision.

“Torah belongs to the Jewish people, what makes us great is our connection to Torah. When we lose it, we lose our distinctiveness and our connection to Yiddishkeit.

If there was more passion there’d be more Simcha and more satisfaction and challenges would then be worthwhile. People don’t mind struggling to get to the joy because joy is worth the pain and suffering and the struggle. Rabbi Kotler would love to see more passion, Simcha, and joy.

The office did receive some complaints, but the Gedolim the magazine consults advised them to include her since there was a real possibility Hilary would indeed become president. However, in Israel, an anti-Mishacha publication blasted Mishpacha , claiming they were breaking the rules of modesty and Torah by publishing a picture of Hilary Clinton.

Rabbi Kotler’s best advice is to seek the counsel of others and always have an open mind. The best advice is when you’re listening to really listen. Be an active listener, and become a better listener.

He’s on a big mission: to expose our brothers to true Torah values, and he bears the responsibility seriously. He often employs a different way of thinking, a creative model, a stretch and a twist, that can support our lifestyle while at the same time show that we care about the Israeli economy, security, and its welfare system. “Instead of just complaining about why we are not understood,” Eli explained during the interview, “we must ask what we can do in this field. While we have to make sure that our kids are not too exposed to the big world, the (outside) world exists, and we have to face reality and come up with practical solutions. “

We Jewish people have always been and especially now in a mortal battle for the survival of the Jewish people and our survival depends entirely on our connection to Hashem which is expressed with Torah, Tefilla, and Chesed.

Rather than hiding his head in the sand, he is ready to take on the problems in our neighbourhoods and cities, working with the authorities instead of against them. Slowly, he believes, we will be able to build better trust.

We are the nation of Hashem and what connects us to Hashem is Torah, Tefilla, and Chesed and without To-

Rabbi Kotler believes he has been blessed to know a lot of people who achieved “outsized results” compared to what you would have thought possible and he encourages you to reappraise what you think you could do with your life.

Eli is proud that Mishpacha does not try to be sensationalist. Rather he makes an effort to keep his editorial policies responsible and sensitive. “If you’re going to do it le’shaim shamayim” Eli ended, “you’ll have disyata d’shmaya to do it right.”

Listen or watch more episodes of Inspiration For The Nation on Apple podcasts, Spotify, YouTube or LivingLchaim.com (or wherever you listen to your podcasts)

54 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM
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No Internet? No Problem! Call our free number to listen to any Living Lchaim episode 712-432-3489 NEW EPISODES EVERY MOTZEI SHABBOS
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“Torah belongs to the Jewish people, what makes us great is our connection to Torah. When we lose it, we lose our distinctiveness and our connection to Yiddishkeit. “

Health & F tness Seeing and Believing

My children want to know about world events, and being children, they prefer watching the news over reading articles. When there is a tragedy or an accident or a frightening news item, I notice that even some of the frum online media will show images of accidents, of bloodshed and other graphic stories. Is it better that they understand the news by getting a clear picture of what has happened or is it better for them to be sheltered from disturbing photos and videos?

Rabbi Dr. Dovid Fox Responds:

Our Sages in the Talmud and in the Mishna have taught us about the pliable minds of our young ones. Misinformation can sear its way into the mind, and it is hard to rehabilitate a child’s early erroneous mental imagery. In addition, when a child is presented with ideas and with images for which he or she is not yet ready, the mind will experience confusion. The more confusing and upsetting that exposure is to the young child, the more there is actually a risk of brain traumatization. There are topics, pictures and ideas for which young children are not mature enough to make sense of, and those images and words will hover within the child’s mind, hard to erase. A child may feel sickened, saddened, shamed or enticed

by exposure to things which he or she may feel were inappropriate, or for which they knew they were not supposed to be seeing at their age. When this happens, the mind will bounce between trying to suppress the thoughts and feelings and wanting to go back to those topics which have violated their innocence. In the extreme, this can lead children to obsess, be distracted, moody, or to feel conflicted

duct. The more one is exposed to violent imagery, for example, the more one might become conditioned to accepting violence as a way of life. Some of our failure to empathize with, to feel for those who suffer, is a result of overexposure to games involving aggression and stories about crime. As for the child who engages in such “play,” learning to accept and to tolerate these themes as an acceptable way of life can

victims and their families. News can be talked about and explained to children, so that there is healthy learning taking place. However, when a child is riveted to the scenes of broken glass, and bleeding bodies, of sirens and emergency medical procedures, that wholesome learning is usually obviated. Instead, the child will “at best” experience fear and worry and “at worst” will begin turning to such media with excitement, finding stimulation in these clips and remembering only the body count and the schadenfreude.

about themselves. It can also prompt acting out of violent and base urges. Children learn to believe that what they see must be acceptable.

Gruesome and gory pictures, grotesque scenes, and sensationalized stories bring the horror into the home, where children need to be children. Images which an adult might be able to handle because the mature brain is equipped to process such adult realities can nonetheless desensitize the adult to violence or to other miscon-

block their developing conscience, compassion, and impulse control. A significant number of children who struggle with inattentive and distracted thinking and behavior are preoccupied with fantasies and pictures which erode their ability to focus.

When the media covers, say, the story of an accident, this might be an opportunity to impress upon a young child the importance of safety, or safeguarding health, or exercising our faith and our prayers, or feeling sorrow and compassion for the

We recommend that parents think carefully about the tastefulness of allowing a child unnecessary exposure to graphic media which can contaminate the mind with ideas and with characterizations which are literally and figuratively over their heads. Educate your children by conversing with them, learning with them, exposing them to values rather than to vanity. Allow them to be children while they are young, so that they will be ready for a sensitive and stable adulthood.

Rabbi Dr. Dovid Fox is a forensic and clinical psychologist, and director of Chai Lifeline Crisis Services. To contact Chai Lifeline’s 24-hour crisis helpline, call 855-3-CRISIS or email crisis@chailifeline.org. Learn more at www.chailifeline.org/crisis.

55 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM
News can be talked about and explained to children, so that there is healthy learning taking place.

Tech Triumphs

An Unexpected Benefit By Rebbetzin Sara Gross

Iran my business on Whatsapp. My phone was constantly dinging, and I felt myself unable to make it through a conversation without feeling the need to check who was Whatsapping me at any given moment. Finally, I had enough. I deleted Whatsapp from my phone and it made big waves in my business field. Everyone I met was commenting on my choice. Then I called a vendor who I use and got quite a surprise. The man in charge of the booking said, “I heard you deleted Whatsapp. I am so impressed and inspired by the fact that you could do that even though your business relies on it heavily. I will give you a discount on our usual fees simply out of respect for your admirable and inspiring decision.”

I was a little shocked at the widespread reaction to my choice. Then I realized that so many people are drawn to their phones constantly to check Whatsapp. Although so many people feel that there is nothing intrinsically wrong with the app, many recognize that it just has a way of sucking a person into checking it way too often. Because of the number of chat groups people tend to be a part of and the non-stop avalanche of messages it is grabbing our attention constantly. It makes it hard to focus and concentrate on life and it has proven to be well worth it for my peace of mind to function without it.

DID YOU KNOW?

Did you know that when we get

into a hyper focus mode of work, we are most productive. If we are working or doing a task that requires concentration, this mode is imperative to our success. A ding or message that distracts us from our task can ruin our deep concentration mode. It takes roughly 23 minutes to achieve that same flow of concentration that we need to be most focused. Imagine how hard it is to achieve proper productivi-

ty with all the dings and messages that come from a cell phone nearby. This causes severe drops in productivity in any work environment. It is a good idea to turn off any notifications when working to avoid such strong distractibility.

To share a tech triumph or story of chizuk, please email Techtriumphs@tagbaltimore.org

This is a service of TAG Baltimore. TAG Baltimore is an organization that provides technology awareness, education, and support. They can be reached at 410-449-1824 or help@ tagbaltimore.org.

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Schmoozing with the Big Cheese

Brent Delman, “The Cheese Guy,” Shares His Secrets of Cheesemaking

Shavuot is here and that means you’ll likely be ingesting more dairy than on other holidays throughout the year. Most dairy meals rely heavily on cheese, and most people who rely heavily on cheese rely heavily on The Cheese Guy.

58 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM The Jewish Home | JUNE 2, 2022 122 OctOber 29, 2015 | the Jewish Home 50

Brent Delman grew up in the suburbs of Cleveland in a house that was very Jewish but not necessarily very religious.

“My family was a traditional Jewish family,” said Delman about his upbringing. “We didn’t keep kosher, and we didn’t keep Shabbat, but Judaism was very important to us.”

The neighborhood was mostly a mix of Jews and Italians. Not keeping kosher meant a pretty deep exposure to authentic Italian food early in life for Delman. He experienced the varied flavors and levels of quality of some of the specialty foods that were available in the local markets nearby. But there was one thing that interested him just as much as food.

“I was always very entrepreneurial,” Delman recalls. “I had paper routes and landscaping businesses when I was very young. In high school, I created a window washing business that employed my friends and brothers and helped us get through high school and college with some pocket change. I always loved being in business for myself.”

With a love for food and the drive to learn more about business, Delman moved on to college where he got his bachelor’s degree in international relations at nearby Ohio State University. After that, it was a master’s in business from George Washington University in Washington, D.C. While he would certainly come to need both of those degrees for where his business would go in the future, Delman finds what he did during those years outside of the classroom to be just as important.

“I used to backpack around the world,” Delman said casually about some trips that would make almost anybody envious. “Before I started college, I took a year off and went backpacking through Europe and Israel. I also spent a semester at Tel Aviv University in my junior year of college. Between undergrad and grad school, I went backpacking through more of the Middle East and Africa.”

Armed with some worldly experience, a love for food, the entrepreneurial spirit, and the education to bring it all together, Delman started his career in the food business.

“My first job out of business school was with a large food company,” recalls Delman about his early days in the business world. “I was the marketing manager for a large food company that was buying and selling food commodities. I helped establish a specialty food division inside that company.”

Delman was successful in his role, but he did what he has always done and what he still does; he wanted to learn more.

“I started to attend trade conferences and started to meet with farmers,” said Delman of how he really started to gain some of the knowledge he would later need to make his dreams a reality. “I figured that it would be the right time to start my own business and take some risks while I wasn’t married and didn’t have kids. So, I started a wholesale distribution company for specialty foods.”

Just like that, he was out on his own. And as you’d expect of him, Delman put his nose to the grindstone and got his business rolling. Sometimes, literally.

“I was dealing with dry goods, so I started storing things in my garage. I bought an old, beat-up van and

rented a little bit of space. I was the salesperson, the bookkeeper, the delivery driver… I did it all,” said Delman, the typical jack of all trades. “I slowly started to increase volume by selling to independent specialty markets like Zabar’s.”

Getting clients like that was certainly impressive for a company that was essentially just starting out in the business. Delman’s hustle was paying off, and he was starting to gain enough sway to start picking his spots.

“I was never much of a meat eater,” Delman explains, as you might expect of someone who now carries the nickname “The Cheese Guy” around, “so I focused on some specialty vegetarian and vegan products like sundried tomatoes. I was one of the first distributors of quinoa in the United States. As I got my first warehouse with refrigeration, I started carrying some cheeses.”

The Yellow (Cheddar) Brick Road

But before The Cheese Guy could become the big cheese, he had to find his path. His company, Old World Marketplace (a company he still has today), was successful, but there were some setbacks that he didn’t see coming.

“At the time, I was a wholesale distributor of other people’s products, both kosher and non-kosher,” said Delman about his operation. “But it seemed like every time I built up somebody else’s brand, they would take their line to a larger distributor.

“I got burned many times. I decided that I needed to create my own brand where I could become the expert. My real passion was in cheese.”

want to confuse his children with a double standard, and slowly his family started to become more observant. Delman wanted his children and grandchildren to carry on Jewish traditions for generations to come.

Seeing the path open in front of him, Delman had to figure out how to follow the yellow (cheddar) brick road.

“I decided that I had to become the expert on cheese,” said the man now known as “The Cheese Guy.”

“Knowledge is power. I had to be able to create a unique niche of my own. I had done a lot of traveling, but I wasn’t your typical traveler. Instead of going to museums, I would love to see how food was manufactured. Or I would visit farms and schmooze with the farmers.”

There’s a big difference between selling other people’s products and making your own. That was something that Delman was going to have to figure out. His other issue was that, in many cases, it was really the farmers that he would have to rely on instead of himself.

“I started developing relationships with local farmers in upstate New York and Vermont,” Delman said about the networking portion of his job. “When I went back to visit Cleveland, I did the same at Amish farms near where I grew up.”

Luckily for the kosher-keeping population, this realization of Delman’s came at the same time as something else.

“This was around the time that I started keeping kosher,” Delman said about his journey. “I realized that there was a lack of good quality kosher artisan cheeses on the market.”

Delman had been involved in Hillel and some Jewish student organizations in college and grad school. At some point, he realized that so many of the family and friends that he had grown up with did not have a formal Jewish education and many of them were intermarrying with non-Jews.

Once he got married and had children of his own, he started raising his family in Passaic, New Jersey, and sent them to Jewish day school. As the other kids in their classes kept kosher and Shabbat, Delman didn’t

Still, a big part of making your own cheese is the science. And unlike some other products, food science plays a prominent role in cheesemaking. While most of us can just go to the supermarket and grab a brick of one of his artisan cheeses, Delman had to learn about things like affinage (a French word that means the aging and ripening of cheese).

“I started reading everything about how cheese is made,” recalls Delman about what seems like a difficult trip back to school. “I went to the Vermont Institute for Artisan Cheeses and took some additional courses on cheesemaking and the process of cheese aging. Then I took some courses from a French cheesemaker. I also took a kind of apprenticeship at some of the farms so I could do some hands-on learning with cheesemaking and aging.”

That hands-on part of the job became more important to Delman. In his previous job, the food was just a commodity to be bought and sold. In his new business, he’d be visiting farms and working with the product himself.

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“I flew back to Italy and told them that I wouldn’t do business with them anymore unless they tweaked the filling’s texture.”

Ask The Cheese Guy: What

are your favorite cheeses?

◊ Tilsit - “This is a cheese we make up in Vermont. It tastes a little like a combination of the nuttiness of gruyere, which is a Swiss-style cheese, but it has the creaminess of a Havarti.”

◊ Viney Sheep - “This is a cheese we make from a proprietary recipe we developed in Italy. My wife and I went to Italy and visited one of my Italian partners, and we traveled around to farms together. It’s soaked in kosher red wine. It’s a takeoff of a non-kosher cheese called drunken goat or winey goat, which is a goat cheese that’s soaked in wine. It’s aged for two to three years.”

◊ 4-year Aged Parmesan with Cheddar Notes

- “It’s not quite as salty or sharp as an Italian parmesan, but it’s a very unique cheese. It tastes a little bit like a cheddar and a little bit like an aged gouda. The flavor is complex and amazing.”

Ask The Cheese Guy:

What’s the right cheese for…

◊ Grilled Cheese?

“I’d go with the sharp cheddar. Put in some green apples, a little bit of Dijon mustard, and some caramelized onions.”

◊ Mac and Cheese?

“You’ve gotta put in the chipotle cheddar. I might also use the Monterey jack or creamy Havarti, depending on what you like.”

◊ Fondue?

“The raclette is a pungent, creamy, French cheese that’s often used for melting. It’s great for fondue. Another traditional use for melted raclette is over top of potatoes.”

Ask The Cheese Guy:

What might you make for Shavuot?

◊ Cacio e Pepe - “It’s a really popular dish these days. It’s a pasta dish where you use an aged sheep milk cheese (like pecorino), black pepper, and different creams depending on what you want the sauce to be. You can use any pecorino, but I have a pecorino with black peppercorns in it (pecorino al pepe nero) that’s great for this.”

◊ Baked Brie - “I loved baked brie. I have one brie from Vermont and an imported French brie. Both are now cholov Yisroel. I enjoy making baked brie with different berries and berry preserves.”

◊ Cheese Dip - “I love to make cheese dips at home. Try taking chunks of leftover cheeses and throwing them in a food processor with some olive oil, garlic, and white wine. Now you’ve got your own homemade gourmet cheese spread or dip, depending on consistency.”

“I decided I really wanted to have an effect. I loved being involved in the artisan part of the business,” said Delman about his newfound niche. “I liked working with my hands and doing some physical work besides the learning, the science, and the intellectual. So I built a cheese cellar in the basement of my house that I’ve had for about 12 years. I use it as a kind of cheese lab where I can experiment a little with the cheeses.”

The Kosher Experience

Now that he was getting into the cheese business, Delman needed a name. His younger brother, Todd, has helped with some of the marketing and technical aspects. Somehow, www.TheCheeseGuy. com wasn’t yet taken, and they were able to secure the domain name. They were also able to trademark the logos and name.

Todd continues to help out with the patents for some of The Cheese Guy’s proprietary cheese varieties and recipes. Two of those proprietary cheeses that are big hits now are the Beer Cheddar and the Smoky Gouda.

“The Beer Cheddar is a Vermont small-batch handmade craft beer cheddar where we bring in different locally made beers to use as an ingredient in the cheese,” The Cheese Guy explains. “We actually use different craft beers in each production. Partnering up with local New York craft breweries has been fun.

“Another proprietary recipe we have is for the Smoky Gouda. All cheeses have salt in them, so instead of using regular salt, we used smoked salt. It’s made on an Amish farm in northeast Ohio.”

When The Cheese Guy started out in 2008, he had a couple of cheddar and jack types and a local hechsher. It’s hard to believe, but at the time, a sharp cheddar was a new thing for the kosher cheese world.

As the brand increased, he made more cheeses, took on the Orthodox Union’s (OU) hashgacha, and found his way into many more stores all over the country. After getting many requests, he started the quest to make some of his cheeses cholov Yisroel. Today, about half of his cheeses are certified as being cholov Yisroel.

Some of The Cheese Guy’s work was making better versions of cheeses that the kosher consumer could buy already. For instance, his biggest sellers are the cups of shredded and grated aged fresh parmesan. The other brands are either made from scraps or aren’t packaged fresh.

But in other cases, The Cheese Guy had to work with the OU to figure out how to make a kosher version of a cheese that was inherently non-kosher.

“For many years, I tried to make a kosher Manchego,” said The Cheese Guy about the Spanish cheese. “I wasn’t able to make it, because it’s made with animal rennet. So I partnered with a small farm in Israel to make a Manchego-style cheese with non-animal rennet. We called it ‘Manchelli’ (as in Manchego-Israeli). It really took off for a couple of years until sheep’s milk fell into short sup -

ply in Israel, and they weren’t able to export more of the cheese. Around the same time, I was finally able to source a place in Spain that was willing to make Manchego without animal enzymes. So after many years, we now have a kosher Manchego available.”

One of his most recent successes was not without its failures. Making the first version of fresh kosher burrata took some time.

“The burrata is made in northern Italy in a small plant that uses the traditional methods,” said Delman about one of his newest creations. “I had gone to Italy several times to try to get the recipe right. I set up the production and I flew over the first batch, and it wasn’t the right consistency. The Stracciatella (the middle of burrata) is supposed to be creamy, and it wasn’t.

“I flew back to Italy and told them that I wouldn’t do business with them anymore unless they tweaked the filling’s texture. The second batch was better, but it still wasn’t right. So I flew back another time to spend a few weeks there with my family. It was over Rosh Hashana, so I spent Rosh Hashana in Verona in the north of Italy in a 600-year-old shul with the rabbi who is the mashgiach who supervises the production of the burrata. We finally got it right.”

One of the determining factors in making some of the rarer cheeses happen is using different milks. And, no, we’re not talking about 1% or whole. We are talking about sheep or goat milks.

Along the way, The Cheese Guy had to get a bigger warehouse and more employees, especially to accommodate the growing inventory of cheeses that he is aging for later production. Between the aging and the use of different milks, The Cheese Guy stands alone in terms of artisanal quality in the kosher cheese world, even if it’s difficult to produce some of these products.

“One of the challenging ones that we make is a domestic Brie,” Delman said. “To make it kosher, cholov Yisroel, and kosher for Passover, it took me a few years to source the right bacterial cultures and rennet, and I had to have them specially produced in another country. That probably took me about five years from sourcing the product to getting it produced. The cultures are now in a deep freeze, because I had to make it in a very large quantity.”

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where the jams and crackers come in. We label them with pairing options for cheese.”

His daily life these days has to mix in obligations such as corporate events, wine and cheese tastings at shuls, and farmers’ markets. He’s often called into an office with a few kosher-keeping employees because the company knows that his quality will pass any bar, kosher or not.

when you bite them, they have the same kind of effect as a cheese curd. When you bite into them, they have that same squeaking in your mouth.”

In 2022, almost all of the most popular types of cheese are in The Cheese Guy’s artisanal arsenal. The rare ones that aren’t (like gruyere), he’s working on. He is still looking to add a couple of types of cheese every year.

“Our very latest cheese is an organic whipped fresh ricotta,” said The Cheese Guy about his newest invention. “I came up with the recipe with the farms and a creamery over the course of a few years. It’s organic whole milk from small family farms, organic vinegar, and salt. There are only three ingredients. It can be used for baking, but it’s so natural and creamy that I spread it on toast or a nice baguette in the morning. I either go savory or sweet. If I go sweet, I drizzle honey on it with some sliced pear or apple. Or in a savory direction, I’ll go with some avocado and tomato with salt, pepper, and olive oil.”

Like a Fine Wine

In recent years, The Cheese Guy has also expanded to making products other than cheese, using a label called “Fine Pairings.”

He often fields questions about the possibilities in kosher cheesemaking. One frequent question is about kosher cheese curds and the likelihood we might see them on shelves someday. He doesn’t say yes, but he

After all the work he’s done over the years, Delman certainly has the gratitude of the kosher community. He’s received well everywhere he goes – and for good reason. Without him, we might still be in the kosher cheese dark ages instead of the kosher aged cheese en-

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“I’d like to think I’ve been able to revolutionize the kosher cheese world.”

there’s no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap. - Kevin

Unless you are a pizza, the answer is yes, I can live without you. - Bill

Any pizza can be a personal one if you cry while you eat it. - Aparna

Ideas are like pizza dough, made to be tossed around. - Anna

I’d rather have leftover pizza than leftover feelings. -Sarah

I love pizza, meaning: even when I’m in the middle of eating pizza, I wish I were eating pizza. - Jandy

Well Said You Gotta Be Kidding Me!

Magic is like pizza: even when it’s bad, it’s pretty good. - Neil

You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I’m not hungry enough to eat six.-

Anyone who says that money cannot buy happiness has clearly never spent their money on pizza. - Andrew W.K.

A man wakes up and finds himself isolated in a hospital room. He has no recollection of how he got there. Suddenly, the phone rings and the doctor on the other end identifies himself.

He tells the man: “I have really bad news. You’re very sick. After your collapse yesterday, we ordered several tests, and got the results back this morning. I’m afraid you have avian flu, Ebola, swine flu and mumps.”

Stunned, the man asks, “Well, what’s next!? What are you going to do?”

The doctor replies, “Well, for starters, we’re putting you on a strict diet of only pizza.”

The patient asks, “Will that really help me, doctor?”

“No,” the doctor responds. “But it’s all we can fit under the door.”

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Centerfold

Cheesy Trivia

1. How much milk does it take to produce one pound of cheese?

a. 8 ounces

b. 1 pound

c. 2 pounds

d. 5 pounds

2. Which state in the U.S. produces the most cheese?

a. California

b. Wisconsin

c. New York

d. Ohio

3. Why are cheeses such as Asiago, Brie, Camembert, Gouda, Gruyere and Parmesan capitalized and other cheeses, such as cheddar, feta, fontina, mozzarella and provolone, are not capitalized?

a. Only cheeses that were created before the 19th century are capitalized

b. Only cheeses that foment for 90 days or more are

Riddle Me This

capitalized

c. Only cheeses that are named after cities are capitalized

d. Any cheese that is primarily produced outside of the U.S. is capitalized

4. Bitto Storico cheese, which is made in the Lombardy region of northern Italy, is aged for how long?

a. 18 years

b. 27 years

c. 41 years

d. 149 years

5. Philadelphia cream cheese took the U.S. by storm in 1880 and quickly began outselling its competitors 10 to 1. Where was Philadelphia cream cheese manufactured?

a. Upstate NY

b. Philadelphia, IA

c. Philadelphia, MI

d. Philadelphia, PA

6. What is the biggest-selling

cheese variety in the U.S.?

a. Cheddar

b. Mozzarella

c. Swiss

d. Parmesan

7. The largest cheesecake ever was made last year at the ninth annual Cream Cheese Festival in Lowville, N.Y. How much did the cheesecake weigh?

a. 350 pounds

b. 700 pounds

c. 1,400 pounds

d. 6,900 pounds

Answers

1-D; 2-B; 3-C; 4-A; 5-A; 6-B; 7-D

Wisdom key

6-7 Correct: You are a certified cheese head!

3-5 Correct: Not bad, you’re “whey” better than some other people!

0-2 Correct: Lactose is intolerant of you!

1. What kind of cheese is made backwards?

2. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?

3. Why didn’t the cheese get a medal at the Olympics?

3. Because it fell at the final curdle

2. Nacho cheese

1. Edam cheese (Just in case you don’t get it – edam backwards spells what?)

Answer:

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Notable Quotes

“Say What?!”

Opportunities are going to present themselves throughout life. Everybody has different opportunities and then you have to make decisions. If you’re careful about that and make the right decisions, it’s better.

– WWII veteran Keith Davison, of Minnesota, age 100, in an interview with Fox Digital

When I was in Sunday school…we used to sing an old song about [how] G-d will take care of you. And I think that’s true.

- Ibid.

You’ve got to be open to things and use what you learn. And realize that human beings are different and you can learn something from anyone.

- Ibid.

I was hit at one point on the Subway by a man who was having a mental health episode. He sat next to me, and he was elbowing and flailing around. He hit me in the face and in my body. And, it was jarring, right? The idea that I would want him to be hurt in any way—I just didn’t want to be near him in that moment because I understood that something is going on here. Every one of us who has taken public transportation has seen someone struggling…but my fear is not the primary object of what we should be focusing on right now. It is the fact that this person is in pain. And, so, like, the politics of dehumanization, privileges, the bourgeois kind of concern for people’s immediate comfort in this narrow instance as opposed to larger humanity and life, it’s freaking twisted. Desire.

Today, the civilization is once again at a decisive, turning point, and an actual war has been unleashed against our homeland again. But we fended off international terrorism, we will protect residents of Donbas too and ensure our security.

- Russian President Vladimir Putin at Victory Day address

Our heroic ancestors proved that there is nothing stronger, more powerful and more reliable than our unity. There is nothing in the world stronger than our love for the Motherland.

- Ibid.

Hardy surprising. After @SpeakerMcCarthy canceled @RashidaTlaib’s “Nakba Day” event in the House, @BernieSanders comes to the rescue and hosts her in the Senate. And this as #IsraelUnderFire from Islamic Jihad rocket bombardment. Sanders is a disgrace and a Jew-hating enabler!

- Tweet by Arsen Ostrovsky

Bernie Sanders is approximately as Jewish as a ham sandwich topped with shrimp on lard bread.

- Response tweet by Ben Shapiro

Where I’m from, if I say I wanna go to the country, it doesn’t mean that place is a country. It’s just how we talk. If I offended anyone in China, I apologize. It was not my intention to harm anyone with what I said in the commercial.

- Former NBA player Dwight Howard apologizing to China for calling Taiwan a country when he appeared in a commercial for the country of Taiwan which China claims is not independent

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- Emma Vigeland of the liberal Majority Report, arguing that it’s twisted for people to be concerned for their safety on the subway rather than to be concerned for the lunatics menacing them
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With your voices and votes, I was able to fulfill my commitment to put the first black woman on the Supreme Court of the United States of America. And by the way, she is brighter than the rest. She is one bright woman.

- Pres. Joe Biden, in his Howard University commencement address, talking about Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson, who said during her confirmation hearing that she was unable to define what a woman is because “I’m not a biologist”

Stand up against the poison. White supremacy … is the single most dangerous terrorist threat in our homeland.

- Ibid.

And I’m not just saying this because I’m at a Black HBCU. I say this wherever I go.

- Ibid.

No you’re saying it because you’re a pathological liar propped up by the media to help fuel dangerous racial division.

- Tweet in response by Julie Kelly

You assume they are good intentions. They are not. He wants to erode the very fabric of civilization. Soros hates humanity.

- Elon Musk, responding to someone extolling the good intentions of George Soros, who is proud that he aided the Nazis (see his “60 Minutes” interview)

Was Netanyahu being anti-Semitic when he blamed Soros for the anti-deportation campaign in Israel?

- a Twitter reply to the Anti-Defamation League accusing Musk of antisemitism for commenting about Soros

ADL should just drop the A. - Musk’s response

Instead of us focusing on how do we duplicate the success of improving our children, we attack the yeshivas that are providing a quality education that is embracing our children.

- Mayor Eric Adams at an OU event last week

We need to ask, “What are we doing wrong in our schools?” and learn what you are doing in the yeshivas to improve education.

- Ibid.

I think he’s a coward, and I think he’s a puppet of Putin. I really do. I think, I don’t know why. To tell you the truth, I can’t figure it out, but there’s no other conclusion to come to.

- Former Trump ally and now nemesis Chris Christie on the Hugh Hewitt radio show eviscerating Trump for not calling Putin a war criminal during his CNN townhall

We apologize but we consider this a product [that is] ideal for any athlete who wants to improve their nutritional habits. We regret if any woman felt offended.

- The organizer of seven-kilometer amateur race for women in Spain apologizing after being criticized for the winning prize being a food processor

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There’s lots of controversy around it.

Still, lots of people like to pound it.

While others would completely ground it.

Yet, for me, I’m glad I found it.

For those who enjoy riddles, I’m tempted to say, so what am I?

Sure, take a guess!

But that was meant to be an intro, not a quiz.

It’s not an earth-shattering topic; still, it does have its users, abusers and dissenters.

OK, I’m sure I’ve piqued your interest by now, so here goes…. Did anyone think it was this? Chewing gum!

Yes, that diabolical, amazing, chewing source that sticks around forever.

Now, it seems minuscule and innocent enough, so why does it inspire such extreme reactions?

Perhaps because of its flexible uses!

Perhaps because it inspires fear?

Just recall parental responses to their little ones chewing it… “JUST DON’T SWALLOW IT!” as if it will glue all their internal organs together, never to find independence and functionality.

Maybe because of its ability to last and last and this thus irritates others. It never goes away. People chew it and chew it and chew it. And rarely politely! And others go nuts listening and listening and listening and finally explode – “Stop chewing like a cow.”

Or there are those who enjoy popping it with little mini explosions every second while others cringe from this continuous sound, something I enthusiastically practiced learning as an adolescent, by rolling my tongue between my molars as instructed and now I must practice undoing because it was not one of the similarities I remembered to explore with my husband when we were dating. And he doesn’t enjoy hearing it. To put it mildly.

(Daters, maybe you better think about addressing this one while figuring it all out, though, recognize there will always be things you have to work through and

Life C ach Stuck on You

collaborate on after your union, so maybe just leave this one on the back burner.)

There are those who would deposit it anywhere when done with it, without a thought of the trauma to the one who encounters it! Experiences such as: a stranger getting it stuck on their shoe and knowing the last thing they want to do is touch your yucky germs to remove it or

blowers.” Obviously not the most appealing look. But a skill we all try to master as kids. Hours of flattening the gum over our tongues and then blowing into it hard, unfortunately to have it land halfway across the room quite a number of times! That is, until we master the skill of getting the air subtly under it and thus creating that perfect balloon extending

keep blowing those bubbles? After all, who else is going to be impressed with this skill you worked so hard to develop?! The secret is to wet your lips before making the bubble – it’s helps at least 50% of the time to curtail the damage.

I personally find gum a great appetite suppressant. When I want something sweet, I find this works to satisfy my need and not add to my calories. I probably even work some calories off while I’m chewing it!

I know it’s not my best look. And though I do opt for sugar-free gum, I doubt my dentist would encourage it. My husband certainly doesn’t. But if I’m going to reach for something, I’d rather it be this than a candy bar or ice cream pop. Wait did I just say, I’d “rather”? Correction: what I meant to say was, I sometimes choose to reach for the gum instead. I’d never rather!

And honestly some just seem to enjoy a snack that keeps on giving. That is, until the flavor is completely gone but then they just pop another piece in their mouth.

In fact, I seem to remember as a kid stuffing it all in at once. Just for the thrill of it.

It’s easy to have it around, takes up little space, and often with the right brand has flavor that sticks around a long time.

Now, non-users may claim it as an item that keeps giving to them too – as a good headache.

the nauseating experience of inadvertently playing with something under the desk and only realizing it’s used gum later.

Gum chewers often fail to think about the traumatic consequences to strangers who will encounter their gum flippancy.

There should be a gum etiquette manual written. Now there’s a job for someone looking for a gig!

Then there are also the “gum bubble

from our lips – interestingly, only to ever use the skill, again impressively, for the enjoyment and inspiration of another little kid who, then, lovingly smashes it into your face with glee while you spend the next 15 minutes picking it off your lips and the outside of your nose. Then, of course, your audience shouts, “Make one again!”

Then, of course, why wouldn’t you

So, whether you’re a user, abuser, or dissenter, I hope these insights can help us all learn to stretch a bit. And to be more considerate of others as we malign or partake in this underrated, extremely controversial activity.

Rivki Rosenwald is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist working with both couples and individuals and is a certified relationship counselor. Rivki is a co-founder and creator of an effective Parent Management of Adolescent Years Program. She can be contacted at 917705-2004 or at rivkirosenwald@gmail.com.

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Gum chewers often fail to think about the traumatic consequences to strangers who will encounter their gum flippancy.

END OF SESSION 2023 Newsletter

Dear Friends & Neighbors,

I am proud to inform you that the Maryland General Assembly’s 445th session has come to a successful close. Working together with our new Governor, we ensured that this session was extremely productive for all Marylanders. I am confident that my hard work this session will benefit all my constituents in so many ways, and I proudly share this end-of-session newsletter with you. 2

DELEGATE, DISTRICT 41

By Authority of: Dalya Attar for Baltimore, Sara Goldfeiz, Treasurer

"...the State’s Fiscal Year 2024 Operating Budget passed with record funding for projects in the district."

11

BUDGET PUBLIC SAFETY

"We all deserve to be safe. This is a top priority of mine, and I therefore spent a significant amount of time this session fighting for funding and new laws to address crime."

@Delegate Dalya Attar @dalyaattar41 @delegate_dalya_attar

68 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM End of Session Newsletter 2023
www.dalyaattar.com Dalya.Attar@house.state.md.us

FUNDING FOR PROJECTS IN DISTRICT 41

A crucial part of the budget is ensuring there is funding for projects in the 41st District.

My colleagues in the 41st District, Senator Carter, Delegate Bridges, Delegate Rosenberg, and I strongly advocated for many of the requested projects and I am so proud to announce that we were successful in securing millions of dollars in funding for our district!

• Edmondson Village Shopping Center $2 million

• Choo Smith Youth Empowerment $750,000

• Construction of new Enoch Pratt Free Library branch in Park Heights Combined investment of more than $11 million in Federal, State, and City funds

• Cheder Chabad Fitness and Rec Center $50,000

• Cylburn Nature Center $100,000

• Dickey Hill Elementary School Auditorium $171,500

• Fairmount Park Neighborhood Lighting $80,000

• Hillside Park $250,000

• Liberty Grace Teaching Kitchen $100,000

• The Economic Empowerment Coalition $350,000

• Tiferes Golda, Inc. $75,000

• Yale Heights Park $50,000

• Forest Park Renaissance $50,000

• LifeBridge Health – Cancer Treatment Center at Sinai Hospital $1.5 million

• The Associated: Jewish Federation of Baltimore for the Park Heights Campus Expansion and Renovation $500,000

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End of Session Newsletter 2023
Dalya Attar

EDU CATION

EDUCATION

Ensuring all our students receive the best education possible is a top priority of mine.

Our children are our future – and that is not just a cliché statement; our children are literally our future. I therefore worked on legislation and advocated for sufficient funding in the budget for all schools.

HB 486: Task Force to Study Nonpublic Student Bus Transportation

In an effort to address environmental and safety concerns, I sponsored House Bill 486, which establishes the Task Force to Study Nonpublic Student Bus Transportation, to be staffed by the Maryland State Department of Education. The task force must collect information from each local board of education and any other relevant county department regarding nonpublic school student busing programs in the county, other than programs for the transportation of students in special education placements. In addition, the task force must evaluate the impact on State revenues and expenditures, traffic congestion, and environmental and safety goals of the adoption of programs used in other states to provide transportation to nonpublic school students or otherwise reduce the use of passenger vehicles for the transportation of nonpublic school students. This bill passed both chambers, and the task force will begin its work in the near future.

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Attar End of Session Newsletter 2023
Dalya

HB

185: Nonpublic Schools and Child Care Providers - Corporal Punishment – Prohibition

I cosponsored this bill, which prohibits the State board from issuing a certificate of approval to any non-collegiate educational institution that does not have a policy prohibiting a principal, vice principal, or any other employee from administering corporal punishment to discipline a student. Regulations adopted by the State board must prohibit the administration of corporal punishment in a family child care home, large family child care home, or child care center.

HB

375: Coaches - Mental Health Training

It is easy to ignore mental health issues; however, they are very prevalent and affect all types of people. Our students have many stresses that can lead to mental health concerns, and our athletic students are, many times, under even more pressure than others. We must make mental health a priority to protect our athletes, and I am proud to have sponsored a bill that accomplishes this.

House Bill 375 requires each public school in the State and each public institution of higher education that offers an athletic program to provide mental health training to each participating coach. This bill passed the House of Delegates but did not receive a vote in the Senate. I look forward to refiling this bill next session and ensuring we are training our coaches in recognizing the indicators of mental illness and behavioral distress in students.

State Tuition AssistanceBOOST Funding

Every child is unique, and the amount of money a parent makes should not determine what school the child attends. The child’s abilities and uniqueness should be the factors determining their school.

The Broadening Options and Opportunities for Students

Today program is a scholarship program that helps lowincome students pay for non-public school education.

After spending a significant amount of time advocating for this program, I am pleased that 9 million dollars was allocated in this year’s budget. In addition to this funding, 6.5 million dollars was allocated for the non-public schools’ textbook program, 3.5 million for private school enhancements and 6 million dollars for private schools for safety, medical costs and various educational uses.

71 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM Dalya Attar End of Session Newsletter 2023

EDUCATION CONTINUED.

HB 381: Due Process Proceedings for Children With Disabilities – Burden of Proof

The current process for our families with disabled children to find the best educational fit for their children is extremely burdensome. Finding ways to relieve some of the burden from these families is crucial. I spent a significant amount of time working on this issue and filed House Bill 381 this session, which would shift the burden of proof onto the school system in Baltimore City & Baltimore County. After significant advocacy, the House of Delegates passed the statewide bill that would shift this burden. The Senate did not vote on the bill, and I look forward to continuing this fight next session for all our families with children with disabilities.

I also cosponsored House Bill 504, which establishes the Maryland Developmental Disabilities Council as an independent unit of State government. The council operates and receives funding in accordance with the federal Developmental Disabilities Assistance and Bill of Rights Act of 2000 and among many other duties, it serves as an advocate for individuals with developmental disabilities. TheGovernorsignedthisbillintolawthefirstdayaftersession!

HB 1237: Special Education - Judicial Actions - Attorney’s Fees and Related Costs

I cosponsored this bill which authorizes a court to award reasonable attorney’s fees and related costs, including expert witness fees and costs, to the parent of a child with a disability, if the parent prevails in a proceeding that is held to resolve disputes about the identification, evaluation, or educational placements of children with disabilities or the provision of a free appropriate public education.

HB

525: Outdoor Preschool License Pilot Program

I cosponsored this bill, which establishes an Outdoor Preschool License Pilot Program, administered by the Maryland State Department of Education. The purpose of the pilot program is to license outdoor, nature-based early learning and child care programs in order to (1) expand access to affordable, high-quality early learning and child care programs and (2) investigate the benefits of outdoor, nature-based classrooms.

HB1242 / SB0841: Local School Systems - Student Field Trips - Funding

This bill requires the Governor to include $500,000 in the annual budget bill for the Maryland State Department of Education to provide grants to local school systems for expenses related to student field trips to museums of cultural import. This includes museums that provide the history and culture of oppressed and historically underrepresented communities, including the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum, the National Museum of African American History and Culture, the Jewish Museum of Maryland and the Reginald F. Lewis Museum of Maryland African American History and Culture. I sponsored this bill and am proud to report thatitpassedbothChambersandisnowlaw!

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Dalya Attar

PUBLIC SAFETY

Violent crime continues to occur every single day in our neighborhoods, and I will not back down from fighting to combat this. We all deserve to be safe. This is a top priority of mine, and I therefore spent a significant amount of time this session fighting for funding and new laws to address crime.

HB1243/SB0840: Protecting Against Hate Crimes Grant Fund

House Bill 1243/Senate Bill 840 addresses the dramatic increase in hate crimes at our mosques, synagogues, churches and other non-profits and faith-based institutions.

It establishes the Protecting Against Hate Crimes Grant Fund, a special fund administered by the Executive Director of the Governor’s Office of Crime Prevention, Youth, and Victim Services, to provide grants to nonprofit organizations, including faith-based organizations, to provide security enhancements to protect against hate crimes. For fiscal 2025 and each fiscal year thereafter, the Governor must include in the annual budget bill an appropriation of $5.0 million to the fund.

Isponsoredthisbillandamproudtoannouncethatthisbillpassedbothchambersandisnowlaw.

HB 159: Criminal Procedure - Warrantless Arrest - Straw Purchase Participant

Gun violence is killing our children and residents daily in Baltimore. Unfortunately, people are selling handguns to prohibited individuals, who are then using these guns to perpetrate gun violence. I therefore refiled House Bill 159, Criminal Procedure - Warrantless Arrest - Straw Purchase Participant, which would allow law enforcement, without having to obtain a warrant, to arrest individuals who conduct straw purchases. I am proud to announce this bill passed the House of Delegates again. Unfortunately, the bill was not voted on in the Senate. I look forward to continuing advocating for this bill and for it to become law in the future.

HB 13: Hate Crimes – Civil Remedy

House Bill 13 enables victims who have suffered hate crimes to bring a civil action against the person or persons who committed the act, as hate crimes are dangerously increasing in Maryland and the nation. Thirty-three states currently have civil remedy as part of their hate crime law, and Maryland is overdue to join them.

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HB 481: Criminal Law – Wearing, Carrying, or Transporting a Handgun – Penalty

I cosponsored this bill, which increases the maximum penalty for a person illegally carrying a handgun from three to five years. This penalty increase was amended into HB 824 which passed both chambers and is now law.

SB 858: Firearm Safety - Storage Requirements and Youth Suicide Prevention (Jaelynn’s Law)

Senate Bill 858 strengthens Maryland’s gun safety laws and reduces children’s unsupervised access to firearms. The bill enhances the penalty for violating the State’s safe storage laws. This bill also takes action to help prevent youth suicide by requiring the Deputy Secretary for Public Health Services to develop a youth suicide prevention and firearm safe storage guide.

HB 1244: Maryland Holocaust Remembrance Day

Studies show there has been a significant increase in antisemitic crimes. In an effort to combat antisemitism, I sponsored House Bill 1244, which creates a Maryland Holocaust Remembrance Day on January 27th. This day coincides with the day the troops liberated the Auschwitz concentration camps.

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TAXES & BENEFITS

HB 2: Income Tax – Subtraction Modification – Union Dues

House Bill 2 gives a tax deduction to Maryland workers paying union dues. This will ensure we put more money back into the pockets of working families.

HB 180: Income Tax - Subtraction Modification for Adoption Expenses

I cosponsored HB 180, which alters the value of the subtraction modification under the Maryland income tax for the adoption of a child. Specifically, for a taxpayer who adopts a child with a special need, the value of the subtraction increases to $12,000. For a taxpayer who adopts a child without a special need, the value of the subtraction increases to $10,000.

HB 1074: Income Tax - Automated External Defibrillator Tax Credit

I cosponsored this lifesaving bill, which authorizes a nonrefundable credit against the State income tax for the first $500 of the purchase price of an automated external defibrillator (AED) purchased for use at a restaurant in the State. In general, an individual or a business entity that owns a restaurant in the State may claim up to $1,500 in credit in a taxable year; any unused amount may not be carried over to any other taxable year.

HB 554: Keep Our Heroes Home Act

I cosponsored House Bill 554, which expands the State’s existing tax exemption for military retirement income to encourage more of our military veterans to retire here at home in Maryland. Currently, retirees under age 55 may exempt up to $5,000 of military retirement income and retirees over age 55 may exempt up to $15,000. The legislation would eliminate the age distinction and allow for the exemption of up to $25,000 for the taxable year beginning after December 31, 2022, and $40,000 for taxable years beginning after December 31, 2023.

HB 982: State Employees – Programs and Scholarships for Human Services Careers and Probation Agents and State Contributions to Supplemental Retirement Plans

House Bill 982 supports our State workers and institutes targeted programs to fill needed positions as we work to lower the historic vacancy rate in our State government. The bill restores the annual supplemental retirement match of $600 for all participating State employees. For employees who make at least $600 in contributions to their retirement or have paid down their student loans by at least $600, the State will contribute $600 to their retirement. Restoring the supplemental retirement match will help provide relief for those with crushing student loan debt and help them save for future retirement. The bill also creates a program to fill front-line positions at our Department of Human Services by working in partnership with local school systems and community colleges to fill jobs that require a high school degree. The State will then provide tuition assistance and other mentorship opportunities to allow an individual to progress within DHS’s existing personnel structure. Finally, the bill addresses the dangerous vacancy rates at Parole and Probation and the Department of Corrections by providing student loan repayment assistance for our parole and probation agents, who are required to have 4–year degrees.

HB 502: Prevent Electronic Benefits Theft Act of 2023

House Bill 502 makes Maryland the first state in the country to reimburse fraud victims for stolen SNAP benefits. The bill requires the Department of Human Services to automatically restore the benefits of SNAP recipient if shown that the benefits were lost due to theft. The State will use federal funds to help nearly 4,000 Marylanders get back more than $2.5 million in stolen SNAP benefits.

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HB 706: Community Development – Sustainable Communities – Business Facade Improvement Program

House Bill 706 establishes the Business Facade Improvement Program to assist qualified local businesses with improving the outside appearance of their buildings and requires the Department of Commerce to develop an application process for all counties that wish to participate. The ability for older local businesses to keep their commercial districts looking vibrant and appealing is vital to staying competitive, and this bill is an important tool to boost economic development at a time when small businesses continue to struggle with the long-term fallout from the pandemic years and the uncertain economic future ahead.

HB 111 / SB 26: Maryland Medical Assistance Program, Maryland Children’s Health Program, and Workgroup on Low-Income Utility Assistance

House Bill 111 streamlines the process by which people sign up for safety-net services such as Medicaid, Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP), and energy assistance programs. By establishing categorical eligibility, one application process will allow an individual to enroll in all services. Streamlining and creating one eligibility process will maximize the number of State residents who qualify for the Program. House Bill 111 will automatically enroll 65,000 SNAP recipients into Medicaid. This timely legislation will also help SNAP recipients already enrolled in Medicaid automatically renew their coverage.

HB 988 / SB 828: Family and Medical Leave Insurance Program – Modifications

House Bill 988 implements the milestone legislation Time to Care Act for paid Family and Medical Leave that was passed last year. The critical modifications in this bill allow Maryland to begin providing the needed time off and partial wage recovery through the state-administered insurance program (the FAMLI fund) funded by both employers and employee, that our workers and families need to care for their newborn children or ailing family members. The bill improves the administration of the Family and Medical Leave Insurance Program by clarifying and altering certain provisions relating to the administration of the Program.

House Bill 680 provides increased student loan debt relief to new and existing State workers. The bill extends the time taxpayers have for loan repayment from two to three years. It prioritizes State employees who graduated from institutions with at least 40% student Pell Grant recipients, thereby targeting workers who need the tax credit the most and incentivizes students from colleges and universities that have been historically disenfranchised and overlooked to work in State government. The bill is a key tool in providing financial relief for Marylanders who are burdened with student loan debt and for the broader goal of rebuilding State government by targeting institutions that have been historically overlooked.

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Dalya Attar

Delegate Attar’s College Scholarship

I have been fortunate to be able to award hundreds of students in my district with college scholarships. As someone who worked full time during college and law school and is still left with a significant amount of student loans, I understand how difficult paying for schooling can be, and I want to be sure to help in any way possible. The deadline for submitting scholarship applications for this year was April 30th. I look forward to dispersing thousands of dollars to my constituents again this year for scholarships.

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End of Session Newsletter 2023
Dalya Attar

CONSTITUENT ASSISTANCE

As your representative, I have been able to assist so many of you with constituent requests and I am so grateful to be able to do this. Please continue to reach out to me with any concerns or requests for assistance. Cutting through red tape in order to assist you is a top priority of mine.

Thank you for entrusting me to represent you, and I look forward to a successful interim while continuing to work hard on behalf of all my constituents. Please feel free to reach out to me at any time.

My email is dalya.attar@house.state.md.us.

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My Israel Home Ode to the Ugliest Building in Jerusalem

Irecall having a conversation a dozen years ago with my partner Eliezer Goldberg, inquiring when the hideous Supersol building – so-called in honor of the city’s first supermarket, situated underneath the famous structure – will be razed and replaced with a new building. He responded that there were rumblings that the building, located next to the Leonardo Plaza Hotel on the corner of King David and Agron Streets, would get torn down, but the process will be difficult and lengthy, as it was a landmarked building.

Good news: Eleven years after the approval process started, the Jerusalem Municipal Preservation Committee gave final approval in May 2022 to demolish this 7-story eyesore and replace it with a 30-story building containing retail shops along King George Street and residential apartments above. And for all customers of the supermarket, fret not: Supersol (or Shufrasal, to Israelis) on Agron Street is not part of the building and will remain intact and continue to operate.

Built in 1961, The Amir Center – that’s the building’s official name – was designed by Israeli-Brazilian architect and town planner David Resnick. Resnick left his mark on the Israeli landscape, having (1) designed numerous iconic Israeli buildings, such as the Van Leer Jerusa-

lem Institute and the Hebrew University’s Mount Scopus campus; (2) planned numerous neighborhoods, including sections of Modiin and Beit Shemesh; and

(3) created the Yad Vashem master plan to enable the institute to handle the horde of visitors, which total over one million annually. Resnick was truly one of the industry’s original “starchitects” and received the Israel Prize, the country’s high-

thing about this building was different and original. For example, the architect incorporated prefabricated building components to expedite the construction process. The building was feted by the construction industry for its technological innovations, but the general public felt that the apartment building’s modern architecture stood out like a sore thumb in its traditional surroundings. Although

ago, architect David Resnick lamented the building’s dilapidated condition and, offering a brutally honest assessment of the property, said, “the building really was revolutionary but from the beginning there was something unsuccessful about it, gloomy.” How ironic that the structure, though later perceived as an eyesore, was initially considered by some as a bold model of optimism and helped launch Resnick’s illustrious career.

Another ironic twist is that, although many Israelis pretty quickly dubbed the Amir Center “the ugliest building in Jerusalem” – while others called it the “Tel Aviv building” for its overly-innovative design that never fit in with the neighborhood – overseas, the iconic building has been a celebrated paradigm of ground-breaking, modern architecture.

Let’s hope that the new building which replaces the Amir Center will age better than its predecessor and become a beloved Jerusalem landmark and an inspiring addition to the capital’s skyline.

est cultural honor. After he passed away, streets in Netanya and in Jerusalem’s Rechavia neighborhood were named in his honor.

The modernist Amir Center is famous for being built on stilts; this was done to offer views of the Old City from King George Street. In fact, most every-

the Amir Center was initially planned as part of a 3-building complex along King George Street, the other two buildings were never built due to the harsh criticism that this building received.

Unfortunately, the building did not age well and, over time, became rundown and dreary. A number of years

Gedaliah Borvick is the founder of My Israel Home (www.myisraelhome.com), a real estate agency focused on helping people from abroad buy and sell homes in Israel. To sign up for his monthly market updates, contact him at gborvick@gmail.com.

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How ironic that the structure, though later perceived as an eyesore, was initially considered by some as a bold model of optimism and helped launch Resnick’s illustrious career.
The Supersol building in Jerusalem David Resnick
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Dating Dialogue What Would You Do If…

Dear Navidaters,

My son is coming back from Israel before the summer. He is 22 years old and ready to start dating. The problem is (and B”H I have this problem!) that he is not even back yet, and people are already sending me shidduch resumes of wonderful girls.

I am overwhelmed already.

Can you give me advice on how I organize the resumes and look through them to see which ones are the most shayach for him?

Many people who are sending me these resumes don’t even really know my son; is shidduchim about throwing darts at a wall?

I feel like I really need some help. Thank you for your advice!

Disclaimer: This column is not intended to diagnose or otherwise conclude resolutions to any questions. Our intention is not to offer any definitive conclusions to any particular question, rather offer areas of exploration for the author and reader. Due to the nature of the column receiving only a short snapshot of an issue, without the benefit of an actual discussion, the panel’s role is to offer a range of possibilities. We hope to open up meaningful dialogue and individual exploration.

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The Panel

The Rebbetzin

Rebbetzin Faigie Horowitz, M.S.

Iam going to assume that you and your son have already had several conversations about dating as well as what qualities he thinks he needs in a marriage partner. It’s a good idea to communicate and share perspectives on dating, marriage, and more. He has been away from home for a long time and has probably developed in maturity, perspective, and responsibility. His outlook may have shifted due to his experience in Eretz Yisroel and the influence of rebbeim and dormitory friends. It is important that you hear where he is holding and that you give him time to hear your thoughts about how you want to help him on his journey. Since the two of you (as well as your husband) will be helping him along, invest the time and effort to develop a team approach and clarity of commitment to one another. You want to have a basis of trust,

openness, and respect as your son prepares to date. This may take some time. Dating when one gets off the plane, boy or girl, may not be the best idea.

These conversations, and time, will give you a sense of where your son is holding. But you will still have to wade through resumes. If I were you, I would develop three groups/piles. One for those resumes that include names you recognize (teachers, references, neighbors, mechutanim, etc.) so that you will have someone you trust to call and follow up should you decide to do so. Another pile for those with no names you recognize. Then a third pile for the resumes that seem a little different, not cookie cutter, that will be refreshing to peruse. That’s already a big job. You can start reading through resumes with careful attention even before your son is actually prepared to date. Look for what is missing as well as what is there. Pay attention. And you can begin to make inquiries. There are ways to ask questions and probe, but the smart people begin by asking the reference to tell

you about the candidate. Attentive listening through a person’s recital is a good idea before you ask follow-up questions. You will pick up tone and nuance as well as where the person is coming from if you pay attention to a greater context. Don’t barrage the person with questions when you call. Listen, listen, and listen and then ask careful, open-ended questions.

You will get better at this as you develop experience and keep listening to your child. It may make sense to develop some questions before that will help you ascertain what the girl is all about both indirectly as well as directly.

One final word: It’s smart to inquire of adults, not young people who may not know how to communicate effectively about their friends and acquaintances.

No, this is not like throwing darts at a wall. You can develop interviewing skills and do your hishtadlus by talking with your son and with others. But you must daven for help from the One Above to help you help your child find his wife.

The Shadchan

Michelle Mond

Welcome to this new and exciting stage!

Every stage in life comes with its share of perks and frustrations. Here are three pieces of advice I have for you and your son.

When vetting through ideas, look for things that just make sense. For a guy who is just starting to date, it is understandable to first check into ideas within the same geographical location. This not only comes with an automatic familiarity but there are

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Dating when one gets off the plane, boy or girl, may not be the best idea.

cultural nuances that two singles from the same area just “get” about each other.

Have your son make the list of his top 10 – not just the top 10 things he is looking for in a spouse. Have him create a list of his own top ten qualities which will make him a good spouse, along with ten things he can work on to perfect his own middos. Is he impatient? Is he sometimes irresponsible? Is he generous? This will help him keep things in perspective: we all need to work on ourselves and are not a finished product. This is CRUCIAL in this day and age of dating where the men end up feeling as if their options are endless. He should also make a top ten list of the things he is looking for, and when you go through all the ideas you receive, choose the ones that are most in line with his needs.

Keep in mind constantly, “We are looking for ONE,” and put all your focus and energy into ONE person. After the research is done and you’ve gotten a yes from both sides, put your energies into her as if there is nobody else. It is so easy to end things prematurely hoping the next will be more XYZ or ABC enough without giving the current idea a fair chance. People date like this until they finally wake up still single years later. It is common within a sea of resumes and phone calls to believe the next one will always be a better fit.

Hatzlacha to you and your son!

The Single

My first suggestion is to ask your son if he is READY to start dating (and if the answer is yes) and what he is seeking in a potential spouse. I would recommend that you just start with one suggestion at a time, the same way anyone would tackle any overwhelming process. There may always seem to be a “better” option, whether that means closer in distance, social class, beauty preference, and personality. You’ll make yourself crazy if you try to “weed” out the best option because your pile may increase in time. My recommendation is to start with one at a time, focusing first on people who know you best vs. strangers. Trust that G-d has a plan and eliminate pressure or feeling rushed knowing He is guiding you with each person that comes your way.

The Zaidy

Dr. Jeffrey Galler

You understand, of course, that many of our singles, especially our young women, would love to have your “problem.” Nevertheless, I can offer three different approaches to your predicament.

Pulling It All Together

The Navidaters

Dating and Relationship Coaches and Therapists

Thank you for writing into the

panel. How wonderful that you are receiving so many resumes. It’s understandable that this can be overwhelming. Full disclosure: organization is not my forte. It is something I personally struggle with. I will tell you what others have suggested to

me in areas of my life that I need to organize.

It’s all about creating a system. Whether that system exists on your laptop, iPad or in some good, old-fashioned folders you keep in

A lighthearted, playful solution: You’ve probably heard of Professional Closet Organizers or Professional Garage Organizers, who help clients get rid of clutter and get organized. Well, consider me your Professional Shidduch Resumé Organizer.

Here’s what might work for you. Use a computerized Database Management System and categorize prospective dates based on hair color, eye color, height, age, or education.

Alternatively, utilize EXCEL spreadsheets, and classify them according to their financial expectations. Are they looking to marry someone who will be a PKB (Perpetual Kollel Bochur), a Yeshiva Rebbe, an accountant, a lawyer, a doctor, or a Wall Street Hedge Fund manager?

Or, perhaps, you could rent a local hall, anonymously invite all of those young women to a “Singles’ Event,” and conveniently forget to invite any other single men. This way, you (and/or your son) can interview each of them.

Sadly, my wife, who is both my best friend and harshest critic, discouraged me from suggesting such cynical and flippant ideas. Therefore, you need…

A more sincere, serious solution:

It’s important for you to respond politely to those who contact you, even if they don’t know your son.

An appropriate response could be, “This girl seems like a superstar, and anyone who dates her will be very lucky. I will file this suggestion for the time being. When my son starts dating, I’ll have a better sense of what he’s looking for. I’ll get back to you in a few months, and keep you updated. Thank you again for the kindness you’re showing our family.”

In addition to handling these interactions, help your son remain humble despite

a cabinet, start working on that system. Maybe the system includes a trusted friend or relative who can help you with all your reading material. You may want to separate the resumes of the women based on location, chosen career paths, and which resumes “pop” and would spark joy inside your son. You may also decide to review

the overwhelming number of resumés. Encourage him to understand that he is fortunate to receive such amazing suggestions and remind him that these wonderful girls may be more advanced than him, in terms of schooling or career achievements.

Also, suggest to your son how to respond to folks who overwhelm him with shidduch suggestions. He might wish to say, “Thank you for thinking of me. My mother is handling my shidduchim, so let me give you her phone number. Again, much hakaras hatov for your help and kindness.”

Finally, after a few dating experiences, your son will probably develop a clearer idea about the kind of girl he’d like to marry. When this happens, it will make it easier for you to sift through all those resumés and find suitable matches.

A computer’s solution:

Lastly, just for fun, I posed your question to the online, Artificial Intelligence program called ChatGPT.

It responded, “Remember, shidduchim are not about throwing darts at a wall. It’s a thoughtful and deliberate process that requires time, patience, and trust in the process. Trust your instincts, keep an open mind, and, most importantly, support your son in finding the right match.”

a certain number of resumes per evening and when you reach your quota, you tell yourself that tomorrow is a new day. I do like to remind people, in general, to keep an open mind and that a person is so much more than a piece of paper.

Wishing you all the best.

Jennifer Mann, LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist and certified trauma healing life coach, as well as a dating and relationship coach working with individuals, couples, and families in private practice at 123 Maple Avenue in Cedarhurst, NY. To set up a consultation or to ask questions, please call 718-908-0512. Visit www.thenavidaters.com for more information. If you would like to submit a dating or relationship question to the panel anonymously, please email JenniferMannLCSW@gmail.com. You can follow The Navidaters on FB and Instagram for dating and relationship advice.

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It is common within a sea of resumes and phone calls to believe the next one will always be a better fit.

Common Cents Breaking the Silence: Confronting Financial Avoidance Head-On

Financial avoidance is a psychological condition that affects individuals who avoid managing their finances, paying bills, or reviewing their bank accounts. This condition can have serious consequences on an individual’s financial health, as well as their mental and emotional well-being. Financial avoidance is a growing concern, especially in light of the economic challenges posed by the COVID-19 pandemic. In this article, we will explore the causes of financial avoidance, current data on how people are engaging in financial avoidance, and actionable ways to combat it.

Causes of Financial Avoidance

There are various reasons why individuals may experience financial avoidance. Some of the most common causes include fear, shame, anxiety, and a lack of financial literacy.

Fear

Fear is one of the most common causes of financial avoidance. Individuals may be afraid of making financial decisions or taking action because they are unsure of the outcome. They may fear making mistakes, being judged, or losing money. Fear can lead to inaction, which can cause financial problems to snowball and become more difficult to manage.

Shame

Shame is another common cause of financial avoidance. Individuals may feel ashamed of their financial situation, particularly if they are in debt or

have made poor financial decisions in the past. Shame can lead to a sense of helplessness and make it difficult for individuals to take action to improve their financial situation.

Anxiety

Anxiety can also contribute to financial avoidance. Individuals may experience anxiety when thinking about their finances, particularly if they are uncertain about their financial future. Anxiety can lead to avoidance behaviors, such as ignoring bills or avoiding financial discussions with partners or family members.

Lack of Financial Literacy

A lack of financial literacy can also contribute to financial avoidance. Individuals who do not understand financial concepts, such as budgeting, saving, and investing, may avoid managing their finances altogether. A lack of financial literacy can also lead to poor financial decisions, such as taking out high-interest loans or making risky investments.

Current Data on Financial Avoidance

Financial avoidance is a growing concern, particularly in the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic. According to a survey conducted by the National Endowment for Financial Education, 88% of Americans reported feeling anxious about their finances in 2020. The survey also found that 58% of Americans were worried about paying their bills, and 43% had experienced a loss of income due to the pandemic.

An April 17th 2023 article from The Wall Street Journal noted: “Many young adults overwhelmed by financial stress cope by ignoring the problem. Some tune out bank and credit-card balances, lose track of their spending and rack up debt. Average credit-card debt rose 29% to $5,800 in March from a year earlier for millennials and increased 40% to $2,800 for Gen Z, Credit Karma said”

A separate survey conducted by the American Psychological Association found that 64% of Americans reported that money was a significant source of stress in their lives. The survey also found that 35% of Americans reported engaging in unhealthy behaviors, such as eating unhealthy foods or skipping medical appointments, due to financial stress.

Actionable Ways to Combat Financial Avoidance

Fortunately, there are several actionable ways to combat financial avoidance. These include facing your fears, seeking professional help, and increasing your financial literacy.

Face Your Fears Through Small Steps

One of the most effective ways to combat financial avoidance is to face your fears. This may involve taking small steps, such as reviewing your bank account or creating a budget. It may also involve seeking support from friends or family members who can offer encouragement and guidance.

Seek Professional Help

If you are struggling with financial avoidance, seeking professional help may be beneficial. This may involve working with a financial planner or counselor who can help you develop a plan for managing your finances and

overcoming your fears. It may also involve seeking support from a mental health professional who can help you address the underlying emotional issues that may be contributing to your financial avoidance.

Increase Your Financial Literacy

Increasing your financial literacy can also help you combat financial avoidance. This may involve reading books or taking courses on financial topics, such as budgeting, saving, and investing. It may also involve working with a financial advisor who can help you develop a comprehensive financial plan that aligns with your financial situation.

Let’s face it, life is hard and financial stress doesn’t make it any easier. Taking small but meaningful steps can help you avoid falling into the financial avoidance trap.

The decision to start saving and investing is yours, but the “how” can be hard. We suggest speaking with a “fee only” financial planner operating as a fiduciary - having a CPA or tax background is a huge plus. Email commoncents@northbrookfinancial. com to schedule a free financial planning consultation with our team.

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Elliot Pepper, CPA, CFP®, MST is Co-Founder of Northbrook Financial, a Financial Planning, Tax, and Investment Management Firm. He has developed and continues to teach a popular Financial Literacy course for high school students.
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School of Thought

Active Listening

Q:Dear Etti, We are ashamed and mortified. You could say that we are heartbroken! I got the call no one wants to receive from their school; my kid is a bully. They got a few complaints, the teacher picked up on some “goings-on,” and after looking into the matter, it is a fact. My 9-year-old has been tormenting other kids. This can’t go on! Now what?

-Hanging Our Heads

A:Dear Parents, No more hanging your heads! Recognizing the issue is the first step. Kudos for you for taking it seriously and not making excuses!

It is hard to hear that your child is bullying others, but we look at it as a sign of distress or lagging social skills.

“Kids engage in all kinds of behavior that isn’t a reflection of who they are as a person,” says Dr. Jamie Howard, the Stress and Resilience Program at the Child Mind Institute director. “They’re still figuring things out. They can be nice kids who have made some mistakes.” And it definitely does not define you as parents.

A child’s state of friendships is a good indicator or a child’s overall social health. The Child Mind Institute lists reasons why a child might bully.

• The child might want to fit in with a group of children who act aggressively.

• The child is being bullied (at home or school) and is trying to regain control and power by bullying others.

• The child wants attention from others – teachers, parents, or classmates – and hasn’t been successful.

• The child is naturally more impulsive and assertive than the rest of the class.

• The child is overly sensitive and sees affronts where there aren’t any.

• The child does not realize how the victim feels.

(This is common in younger children.)

But the overall reason I find bullying happens is lagging social skills. At each stage of child development, children learn different coping skills. They learn to “read the room” and match their behaviors accordingly. They learn to make friends, negotiate positions, and communicate feelings. “Bullies” solve their problems through intimidation or acts of physical aggression. This is compensation for the skills they are not picking up. When the child feels insecure or there is a social problem, the child lashes out at another person, because when he/she feels powerless or lost, this makes the child feel powerful and in control. Just like some children have difficulty reading text and need extra help learning to decode and comprehend the written word, a child with missing or lagging social skills needs help as well learning to decode and comprehend the way people get along and how to master those skills.

All children want to belong, and be good, liked, and appreciated. And if they can, they do what they can to fit that mold!

Lagging social skills compensation include:

• Calling other people names

• Hitting and physically hurting people

• Forcing others to do things they don’t want to do

• Taking or breaking other people’s property

If your child found communicating and solving problems easier, he/she would not choose these aggressive ways to get what he/wants.

James Lehman, the author of The Total Transfor -

mation, writes better than I could:

Kids who are bullying others should be held accountable at home. They should be given consequences at home for their bullying behavior at school. And the consequences should look something like this: your child should be deprived of doing something he or she likes… And they also should have to do a task. For example, they should write an essay or letter on what they’re going to do next time they’re in the same situation or feel the same way—instead of bullying.

They must start thinking of other ways they can solve this problem. Understand that they may not have any ideas, and that’s where you have to interact with them and coach them as a parent.

If your child is hurting or bullying others, he needs to have conversations that solve problems. He does not need or benefit from conversations that explore emotions. Bullies tend to see themselves as victims, so the conversation has to focus on them taking responsibility for their behavior.

So, no more being ashamed. Instead, get to work. Help your child learn the social skills necessary so he/she can be a kind and personal adult. It’s a process, and you might need a professional to help guide you. But if you help your child with his/her lagging skills now, life will be much more pleasant for all, especially for your child!

Hatzlacha, and may you see much nachas from this child, iy”H,

Mrs. Etti Siegel holds an MS in Teaching and Learning/Educational Leadership and brings sound teaching advice to her audiences culled from her over 35 years of teaching and administrative experience. She is an Adjunct at the College of Mount Saint Vincent/Sara Shenirer. She is a coach and educational consultant for Catapult Learning, is a sought-after mentor and workshop presenter around the country, and a popular presenter for Sayan (a teacher-mentoring program), Hidden Sparks, and the Consortium of Jewish Day Schools. She is a frequent contributor to Hamechanech Magazine and The Journal for Jewish Day School leaders. She will be answering your education-based questions and writing articles weekly for The Jewish Home. Mrs. Siegel can be reached at ettisiegel@gmail.com.

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-Etti
It is hard to hear that your child is bullying others, but we look at it as a sign of distress or lagging social skills.
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a D’var Torah!
to The Candy Store Win $10 HEY KIDS! Take a picture with your artwork and submit it to thebjh.com/kids to enter a raffle for a chance to win $10 to The Candy Store! See your picture in print the following week! Two winners • every week • Submissions due Sunday, May 28th Download extra coloring sheets from thebjh.com
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Zazi Tropper, 6 Yosef F., 8 Yosef Abramson, 6 Yisroel Silberstein, 5 Yisroel Michel Lejtman, 3 Yehoshua, 6, Elazar, 4, & Naftali Shitrit, 3 Tehilla Rosenbaum, 6 Tani Feld, 5¼ Tamar Weiss, 8 Tamar H., 7 Shalom, 12 S. A. Szendro, 7 Rachel Gradon, 4 R. T. Szendro, 11 Nati Coleman, 4 Nachman Lejtman, 5 Miri Tropper, 7 Michoel Slepoy, 9 Eliana Lewis, 9 Eliana & Daniella N. C. S. Szendro, 5 Batsheva Lehrfield, 9 Avigail Tropper, 4 Ari Rosenbaum, 6 Akiva Khaver, 8

Here in these United States, tax policy rests on the notion that tax rates should rise with income, so those who earn more pay a greater share of their income. In 2020, the top 1% of earners took home 22% of all income and paid 42% of all federal income tax. While a significant minority would prefer a flat tax, polls show most Americans support the current system.

But what about fines and penalties for things like parking violations, littering, and other low-level offenses? A $100 ticket can be devastating for a single New York mom struggling to feed her kids— yet the same amount is couch-cushion money for a downtown hedge funder. How fair is that?

Last month, New York City Councilman Justin Brannon introduced a bill that would apply a sliding scale to those sorts of transactions. They’re called “day fines,” and they’re set so that offenders pay a fixed percentage of each day’s income, regardless of how much that might be. Fines might look something like a quarter of a day’s pay for littering or half a day’s pay for double parking.

So far, just two of his fellow council members have signed on to the idea, and

Your Money Check Your Speed

the tabloids are screaming bloody murder. (That’s what makes tabloids so much fun to read.) But in an age when every dollar counts, it’s a plausible idea that might be worth considering.

Well, they do things a little differently in Finland. What else would you expect from a country where reindeer sausage is a delicacy and wife-carrying is a thing?

port, the polissi clocked him doing 64 mph in a -50mph zone. They checked his taxes and discovered that he had made over 7 $ million the previous year. Then they fined him the equivalent of $65,000! (The press didn’t tell us what kind of car Kuisla was driving. But we can assume it came fully equipped with the latest heads-up navigation display,

seriously consider moving abroad,” he whined on his Facebook page. “Finland is impossible to live in for certain kinds of people who have high income and wealth.” Not surprisingly, no one listened to his tiny violin.

The trick, of course, is figuring out how much scofflaws make. Up until 1996, police relied on the honor system. Sometimes that worked, and sometimes it didn’t. In 1996, though, the Tax Administration’s technology made it possible for police to pull up tax info right on the spot.

(Cross the Finnish line first and win your wife’s weight in beer!) In Finland, when the police pull you over, they check your license, your registration, and your tax return . They want that ticket to hurt, even if you’re loaded—so the more you make, the more you pay.

Reima Kuisla is a Finnish investor, hotelier, and racehorse owner. One day in 2015, when he was driving to the air -

active suspension, and special charcoal scrubbers to filter out any stray whiff of poverty.)

Kuisla’s supercharged fine works out to the same as $415 for someone making $50,000 per year. Painful, though not fatal. But if you think he took it in the spirit of Nordic fairness, boy are you going to be disappointed. “Ten years ago, I wouldn’t have believed that I would

So, at least for today, we don’t have to worry about traffic cops and parking enforcement officers snooping through our taxes. But if we did, it would just be another good reason to have a plan to pay less. So set up a time to come see us. And watch your speed on your way over—we don’t want you wasting your savings on a ticket!

Allan J Rolnick is a CPA who has been in practice for over 30 years in Queens, NY. He welcomes your comments and can be reached at 718-896-8715 or at allanjrcpa@aol.com.

94 THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME MAY 18, 2023 WWW.THEBJH.COM
In Finland, when the police pull you over, they check your license, your registration, and your tax return.

Melktaart

Melktaart (also known as milk tart) is a traditional South African milk custard pie that consists of a buttery shortbread-style crust and a deliciously creamy custard center (similar to crème brûlée). This delicacy can be found at every bakery and supermarket in South Africa. We have been making this version, which is adapted from various recipes, for years — it’s always a hit.

Ingredients

FOR THE CRUST:

▫ 2 cups all-purpose flour

▫ ½ cup (1 stick) butter

▫ ½ cup sugar

▫ 1 egg

▫ ½ teaspoon pure vanilla extract

▫ Pinch of kosher salt

FOR THE CUSTARD:

▫ 5 cups whole milk

▫ 3 eggs

▫ ¾ cups sugar

▫ 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

▫ 3 tablespoons cornstarch

▫ 3 tablespoons all-purpose flour

▫ Cinnamon, for dusting (optional)

Preparation

1. for the crust, add all ingredients to the bowl of a food processor fitted with the S-blade attachment and process until just incorporated.

2. Preheat oven to 375°f. divide dough into 2 equal portions and press into 2 (9-inch) pie dishes. Bake for 15 minutes. let cool.

3. for the custard, heat milk in a saucepan over medium-high heat until just boiling.

4. in a bowl, whisk eggs, sugar and vanilla until smooth. Slowly add cornstarch and flour, whisking continuously to prevent clumps. add one cup of hot milk into the egg mixture, whisking continuously, to temper the eggs. Pour mixture into the saucepan and whisk for 10-15 minutes on low heat, until thickened.

5. Pour mixture into baked pie crusts. dust the surface with cinnamon. refrigerate until completely cooled.

Recipe and photo courtesy of Shlomo and Shifra Klein of Fleishigs Magazine. Pick up a copy, subscribe or give the gift that keeps on coming at www.fleishigs.com

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