Australian Family Magazine Summer 2014 by Australian Family Magazine

Family Sum

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A u s t r a l i a n

kids’ The battle for independence Fear and trepidation – returning to work Food allergies – what next? Play space perfect Lock stock and barrel – families moving cross country 2-4-6-8...every day maths

Last chance – nominate for the 2014 Australian Family Early Education and Care Awards

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from my desk Michael Grose, parenting educator, says on his website www.parentingideas.com.au, “your job as a parent is to become redundant, so you need to move your kids towards independence, so they won’t need you.” Now that’s a philosophy which seems counter-intuitive and a challenge, especially in this age of helicopter-parenting and bubble-wrapped kids. But when you think about it, he’s absolutely right. We do our children no favours at all if we persist in doing things for them that they are perfectly capable of doing for themselves, because in doing so we are closing our eyes to a child’s developmental need for growing independence and self-determination. It’s these vital skills that help children reach the Holy Grail, so to speak, of resilience. Two of our articles focus on this in different ways. Win Some, Lose Some addresses which parenting battles to pick, and which to give way on gracefully, in the interests of “slowrelease” independence. Promoting School Culture examines how schools are moving away from “rules” (imposed by adults that children have to obey) to the notion of shared values and behaviours, and how all those in the school (teachers and students) benefit from this shared focus to best create a harmonious school community. And while in many cases, the local primary school is the only option available to parents, it’s worth asking questions about the culture of the school, not just about its facilities and NAPLAN results. In other articles, what goes in at one end usually comes out at the other. Food for Thought, and To Hold or Not to Hold approach the contentious topics of food allergies and toileting habits, from the perspective of what is considered the norm, and when it’s time to seek further help. Once again we invite our readers to consider nominating an early years educator in the 2014 Australian Family Early Education and Care Awards, whether that be an individual or a team who cares for your own preschool age children, or whether it’s yourself or one of your colleagues who is an early years educator. The administrative landscape of early education and care is diverse and volatile as conditions of pay, qualifications and ratios are established with standards that move early years service away from an “industry” mindset to a professionalised “educative” one. Through it all, those most closely entrusted with young children in the early years get on with their daily work and “just do it”. So please, do the same and “just do it”! Nominate someone now. Enjoy reading our Summer edition, Regards

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Australian Family Magazine Managing Director Paul Clancy Editor Jennifer Kernahan Contributors Brooke Lumsden, Jennifer Morton, Emma Reeves, Lakshmi Singh, Prue Walsh, John Weldon Design and art direction Gabriela Rovski – Design and

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Contents

summer2014 edition33

Features 18. The big move

6. Win some, lose some

by Jennifer Morton

by Jennifer Morton Picking your battles on the home front

10. Planning for play

Moving house, moving states

22. school culture by Brooke Lumsden

by Prue Walsh

Play spaces that work

16. Reskilling motherhood

34. Seaside first aid 40. Battery safety 42. Kidstuff

26. Math matters

46. Great giveaways

by Emma Reeves

Focus on every day numbers

29. Food for thought by Emma Reeves

Family

37. To hold or not to hold

How schools create engaged students

by Lakshmi Singh Confidence boosters for reentering the workforce

Regular features on family life

Is it diet or disease?

48. Noticeboard 50. Dad’s view by John Weldon

The coach

Cover image from Shutterstock

Sum

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A u s t r a l i a n

Last chance – nominate for the 2014 Australian Family Early Education and Care Awards

Visit: www.australianfamily.com.au Like: www.facebook.com/australianfamily Follow: on Twitter @familymagazine Australian Family Magazine

kidsdevelopment

winsome lose some By Jennifer Morton

There is a lot to be learned from USA founding father, Thomas Jefferson, who said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;In matters of principle, stand like a rock; in matters of taste, swim with the current.â&#x20AC;?

ick your battles is a common, even cliched saying that all parents have heard before, but it is easy to forget this age-old advice when your child's room is a mess or he wants to wear a superman costume to your parents' wedding anniversary party. When it comes to conflicts over the small stuff, it's important for parents to realise 'you can't win'em all'!

Independence daze From the moment a child is born (even before), the parent becomes the decision maker for everything that child needs. They choose their clothing, footwear, food, toys, cleaning

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rituals, bedtimes, friends; parents decide and children feel secure and loved. That is, until that child realises that they are not a physical part of their parent; they are actually their own separate being - one with thoughts, ideas, plans, needs and wants of their own. When children reach around age two, they start to explore their own independence. This is often the beginning of battles between parent and child: some warranted, some unnecessary. The parent wants to remain in charge and the child wants to be an individual. Child Psychologist and author of Children are people too: A

kidsdevelopment parent's guide to young children's behaviour (Griffin Press), Dr Louise Porter says independence development may start at two years old but it is continuous throughout life. “What we're considering is independence about changes. At three years old, children will want to start dressing themselves and making choices about what they eat; at school age they will want to make choices about their friends and by adolescence, they will want to make choices about how they speak and spend their time. Throughout life, there is an ongoing process about gaining self-governance,” she says. Dr Porter says some parents believe that children should always do as they are told and when that doesn't happen, parents may interpret this as a 'behavioural' problem. “You hear two-year-olds saying 'no' all the time because they've realised that they have different ideas and options from their parents.” “Parents who regard 'no' as being defiant define age two as terrible, but people who regard no as learning-appropriate self assertion, don't find the twos terrible. “Children are acquiring new skills that should be applauded rather than suppressed,” she says.

Look within Many parents may not be aware of the major influence they have over their child's behaviour and actions. Anthony Gunn, a NSW psychologist, father of two and author of Raising Happy Healthy Children (Hardie Grant) says there has been some amazing research on how children pick up on their parents' angst. “If you have an anxious mum and child and just the child is treated, nothing will happen. If you treat mum and the child, the child will improve but if you treat the mum's anxiety, the child's anxiety will also improve,” he says. Although there has always been some amount of pressure from society to be the perfect parent and raise the perfect child, Gunn says parents are feeling those pressures more so then ever. “How to parent is everywhere. It's on the internet, television, magazines, newspapers and sometimes it can be a good thing but it can also be taken to the extremes,” he says. Sydney mother, Eugenie Pepper says that she likes for her kids to enjoy their toys and have a good time and she doesn't nit-pick about the little things. But there is conflict in her home over the clothing choice of her two young children. “I will let my kids wear whatever they want. I don't worry too much about it. I'd rather they be happy and have fun. I try to pick my battles but my husband (who works in fashion) can enforce silly rules sometimes and it creates some stress. He gets upset that they will choose to wear a Wiggles t-shirt over the cute gear he brings home from work,” she says.

In Adelaide, mother and stand-up comedian, Kate Burr can relate to the concerns over the way her child looks. She says that her three-year-old will not allow her hair to be brushed and has a wild style of her own already. Although she is happy for her child to develop her own sense of being, she is concerned that the girl will be picked on for her unkempt hair and funky dress code but so far, she has not witnessed this judgement from others. “Kids can be very judgemental and I don't want my daughter getting picked-on for not brushing her hair. I don't know if it's even happening, probably not. It's probably just in my head at this stage. Grandma gives her matching clothing and hair clips often. I feel she disapproves of the way her granddaughter looks,” she says. Gunn, who is also an expert on 'fear' says that feeling embarrassed by what your child is doing or wearing taps into what is a instinctive fear; that is worrying what other people think of us. “Our children are a reflection of us as parents and parents do gossip. People are afraid of what others may say or think about them. This fear is greater than dying. Going back to caveman days when people lived in tribes and clans, if someone was kicked out of the tribe, it would mean certain death. It's been hard-wired into us to not upset the tribe. This is why we are so focused on protecting our self-image even at times when it can be detrimental to our child's wellbeing,” he says. The late Richard Carlson PhD, author of the best-selling Don't Sweat the Small Stuff series said that parenting is the hardest job in the world but often parents make it harder than it has it be. “While some stress is inevitable in parenting, much of it is often self-created. We use our thinking in ways that take us away from where we want to be. As we become aware of the fact that we are doing so, we open the door to a world of options. Peace of mind becomes possible and from that more peaceful place, parenting becomes more manageable,” he says in his 2001 book, The Don't Sweat Guide for Parents (Hyperion Books). Being mindful of your own actions and words may improve your relationships within the family home and beyond. If parents don't sweat the small stuff, their kids won't either.

Philosophy, routine and compromise Many parents can relate to battles at the dinner table. Ever notice how your child may like a certain food one day and hate it the next? Children will go through stages where they will eat everything, then it seems like suddenly they refuse all offerings. Fights over food can seem endless. Just like the changes that happen during the four behavioural stages (infant, toddler, preschool and schoolAustralian Family Magazine

kidsdevelopment age), Gunn says that children’s tastes buds are constantly changing and many parents don't realise this; insisting that your child stay at the dinner table until their plate is empty or engaging in constant fights over teatime could lead to negative associations with food. Gunn suggests letting the child choose. If they eat X or even some of X, then they can have Y. This gives the child some power to make their own decisions and feel like they are in control. This method can be applied to many of the other disputes between parent and child. When it comes to food, respected international dietician Ellyn Satter has developed the concept of 'Division of Responsibility': The parent is responsible for what, when, where The child is responsible for how much and whether.

Let them win some (matters of taste) ● choose what to wear ● sporting a new hairstyle ● choosing room lay-out ● food choices (within reason) ● staying up on a weekend to watch a movie ● language/slang (inoffensive)

The parent is responsible for what, when, where; the child is responsible for how much and whether “Even if the child doesn’t win the battle, it's important for him to come away with something. This is where letting them choose is so important. The adult is still in charge by giving the child the options but the child feels empowered by getting to choose for themselves,” says Gunn. In her book, Picking your Battles (St Martin's Griffin), Bonnie Maslin PhD advises parents to have a common-sense parenting philosophy in place. What does it mean to you to be a parent? What kind of priorities, boundaries and family policies need to be set? Gunn agrees that it's important to have rules and boundaries in place, that way if the child breaks a known family rule it can then fall back on them as a choice that they made. If the child then wants to turn the situation into a drama-filled battle, let them scream it out on their own. “A lot of parents are terrified of tantrums. With so much pressure on parents now, if a child is not thriving the entire time, then society judges the parent to be doing a bad job but tantrums are a very normal reaction to a lack of selfcontrol, hunger, being over-tired or angry,” he says. Deciding what to give in to and what to stand firm on doesn't have to be too difficult. When it comes to taste (fashion, hairstyle, toys, age-appropriate music and movies; room tidiness) go with the flow and let the child have some control and ruling. When is comes to principles that are for safety and wellbeing (riding with a helmet, wearing a seatbelt, staying out after dark, going to the park alone, viewing inappropriate TV or websites) put your foot down and stick to your rules and the boundaries that were set. If there is very little risk of the child getting hurt or hurting someone else, stepping back from your own values and beliefs to let the child have a win may offer a more peaceful relationship.

Stand your ground (matters of principle) ● wearing seatbelts/helmets

“If it's not going to impact anyone – let it go. It's going to be very important for parents to stand their ground on things they believe in but that doesn't mean they have to be a dictator. Make a compromise that will work for everyone.

● fighting/bullying

“Letting your child win the less important fights will return their sense of control,” says Gunn. af

● sticking to curfews

Reading List

● swimming unsupervised

Raising Confident Happy Children by Anthony Gunn Children are People too: A Parent's Guide to Young Children's Behaviour by Dr Louise Porter Picking your Battles: Winning Strategies for Raising Well-Behaved Kids by Bonnie Maslin PhD

● completing homework ● watching inappropriate television/movies

The Don't Sweat Guide for Parents by Richard Carlson PhD

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Australian Family Advertising Feature

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Australian Family Magazine

Kidsactive

Planning

by Prue Walsh

No playground upgrade is simple. Bulimba Child Care Centre in Brisbane used a team approach to win through to an outstanding contemporary outdoor play space.

arly education and care in modern society has come a long way: from its early inception as ‘carers’ of children to the era of defined learning where the purpose is to lay the foundations for life-long competencies. Learning through continuous play, both indoors and out, is integral to quality early years’ programs. However, many existing early education playgrounds require redevelopment and upgrading to encourage children’s creativity and imaginative play. The process to achieve the best is complex, time consuming and often costly (especially in tight urban sites). An effective playground should invite - even challenge - child participation.

Motivation for change Bulimba Child Care Centre is a small community facility; in 2010, it had a tight, narrow, steep playground for 52 children ranging from six months to five years of age. With the legacy and constraints of the outdated and poorly

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designed external play environment, staff were constantly challenged to develop activities that would suit the space available. There was not even enough space for children to run around freely. The National Quality Standards (NQS) can be a catalyst for change as it highlights shortcomings that must be addressed, but without ‘drive’, energy and informed support nothing will happen. Once the decision has been made for change, those who have a say in the planning include the users (staff and children), the community (including parents), and the regulators (council, State/Federal Governments). After that, drawing up effective plans is crucial, but all too often is of low priority. The role of informed early childhood professional support, with specialist skills from parties who understand how and why children play, is also vital for the success of the finished exterior play space.

Kidsactive

for play

Bulimba Child Care Centre accepted the whole-of-site approach. The concept plan envisaged a 3-D playground flowing down the 3m level change. The plan included a 3-story tower, a scramble embankment, a watercourse, open running areas, courtyards, sandpits, swings - something for every child!

Getting around problems

Bulimba Child Care Centre was fortunate in that its two directors (Bev Book and Karen Broomfield, joined later in the process by Raeleen Wren) felt that the existing playground was not providing the stimulation and challenge that the children clearly needed. They started what turned out to be a three year process with a series of close discussions with Prue Walsh, of Play Environment Consulting, about what could be achieved, followed by an evening workshop for the Parent Management Committee (PMC) about projected changes. Given the dimensions and slope of the playground, upgrading was a challenge. Then it was found that it would be possible (theoretically) to add a 3m wide strip (approx 90m2) along the back fence - if the adjoining state school would agree. Once Walsh had developed concept plans, with initial costings provided by architects and engineers, the directors and the PMC commenced the complicated process of securing funding for the project.

The role of the plan Obviously a plan which involves the whole site will be more effective in terms of play learning because it maximises constructive use of available play space and the flow of play. By contrast, ad-hoc additions involve layer after layer of compromises to play. One of the strengths of a whole-of-site plan is that it can identify potential problems - such as drainage, retaining walls, layout blockages, softfall needs and so on. It is always less expensive to fix all of the problems at once. This is particularly important for existing facilities on tight urban sites.

Every project has its problems, and it is dogged persistence which overcomes them. It is the staff and community members who come home from a full day’s work, and then research or work out solutions and costings in their own time. Planner Walsh then listened intently to the proposals, repeatedly reworking the plans to maximise inclusion of these ideas. Centre father and architect Stuart Mitchell (of John Walsh Architects), provided further support and assisted contractor Val Garino in sorting out complex site works. For centres contemplating a play space upgrade, though, good intentions are not enough, particularly when faced with the demands of an often labyrinth-like bureaucracy. Problems (or should that be challenges?) can be expected in several key areas.

Funding Playground upgrades can be expensive; a base cost of $2000 per child is not unusual (which escalates in difficult sites). There are various sources of funds: government grants, community grants and of course what a facility can fundraise. While eligibility of full or partial upgrades vary, a funding application will be better received if it is accompanied by a comprehensive plan and realistic costings. Bulimba Child Care Centre, as a stand-alone community facility (i.e. not operating under the auspices of a central governing body such as C&K or Lady Gowrie), was only entitled to $5,000 from the State Government funding pool. This put a severe strain on its resources, and it says much for the facility management that it pursued the project.

The parent community Every early childhood service has a mixed group of parents involved, and changes will have a mixed acceptance. This can range from ‘why change?’, to ‘too risky, children might get hurt’, to ‘my child really loves it’. And of course there is the very real inconvenience of interruptions to the centre’s operation while construction occurs. Deliberate efforts must be made continually to bring the parents and community along in partnership - it is worth it in the long run. Australian Family Magazine

Kidsactive The Bulimba Child Care Centre management team with Prue Walsh’s planning assistance had to work and rework the whole-of-site plan, so as to maximise usage - even the existing tree reluctantly had to be sacrificed. Now children can run, play ball games, scramble up an embankment or play quietly under the lookout tower. Teachers can move easily around the playground to support or encourage play activities. Some elements like sufficient spread of tree shade, have yet to grow, but the area appears to be working well and sustaining children’s interest.

The journey Any project is a journey. It starts with a flourish of enthusiasm, reaches an operational stage, which can feel and often does, drag on for many months, before the end is in sight. So be prepared for a hard, often demanding process, but the delight of the children will be its own reward. The staff at Bulimba were asked about their journey. Some of the comments are very insightful:

Bulimba Child Care Centre started off with a PMC workshop, then involved any PMC members who could actively contribute, and over the three years of the project, staff produced news sheets, held open meetings, and kept plans and documents readily available. The result was that the community passion for the project remained committed and available to support their best endeavours and most importantly, budget for it.

Layout of play elements Given the age range of the children, there were many ‘must haves’:

• physical (but not visual) separation of babies and toddlers

• You cannot commit to something for that amount of time without people on the team capable of going the distance. And we could not have done it without planning expertise and ideas. • This outcome can’t be taken out of a book, or grabbed from a catalogue. • We probably underestimated the process of change management needed after it was in. Like what was “outside” and “inside”; we really had to reconfigure how we viewed the outdoor space. • The children, staff and are all working towards getting used to so much more freedom-to-move - even little things like learning to go down stairs without scraping their heels. • We found that we had to increase the size of the food

from the older children

portions (about 50%) because the children are now so physically active.

• access to toilet and inside areas

• It has brought the (teaching) team closer together.

• enough to do, and ways to refresh play opportunities (often using loose parts which need to be stored accessibly)

• I would do it again. The journey has still some way to go, every day we learn new things and better ways to do things. The project is not finished. af

• supervision (visual and physical) and built-in gradients of challenge within the play elements • effective climate management (sun, wind, drainage, shade). Walsh proudly claims that her mantra for tight playgrounds (or indeed any play space), ‘if you can’t use it 20 different ways, why have it?’ is critical. Open-ended play elements have the highest play value. The thoroughness of the planning process and the enthusiastic approach taken by the Centre’s staff and the community appeared to be one of the decisive factors in acquiring the extra land and further funding.

Australian Family Magazine

Prue Walsh – Play Environment Consulting Prue Walsh initially trained as an early childhood educator, and for the past 30 years has focused on the physical environment provision in early childhood centres. In her work, she first establishes with consultation a centre’s needs from both the child development and teaching practice perspective. This information is then the basis for design of facilities, whilst she continues to work closely and collaboratively with the teachers and management to provide an engaging and creative play space for children.

Googi Goog Gai ahh! “It’s yummy, like you Mummy”.

You have to understand toddlers to understand their needs Search for our ‘Toddler Talk’ app on the App Store. Australian Family Magazine

60% of parents NOT connected Are you one of the 60 percent of Australians who are discontented with the amount of time spent with their families – never mind quality time, any time at all would be good! And while work is the main culprit, the speed and variety of modern family life bears some blame, with too many families feeling disconnected from each other. In our survey of Australian Family readers, families said that despite the increasing number of screens in their homes (TV, computers, tablets, laptops and music mp3), families still prefer traditional ways of interacting with each other. Reading to each other topped the ways families spend time together followed by talking, playing indoor games, craft activities and cooking. Playing outdoors and sport, as well as watching TV followed with playing on the computer or electronic games were a much less popular way to spend family time. The sticking point for many families is in just what to talk about when they are together that opens up conversation and doesn’t end up as an ‘interrogation’. We’ve all had the experience of a child shrugging off questions about school and feeling frustrated. Now families can spend more time talking effectively together, by using Wise Talk for Families – a new, unique and interactive story-based game for Australian families.

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Wise Talk for Families encourages parents and children to connect on a more frequent basis and in a more profound way. An extremely effective communication tool, Wise Talk for Families comes with 26 alphabet tokens and a guide-book of engaging questions. Based on the fundamentals of ASK, GIVE and SHARE, WiseTalk for Families inspires families to improvise and adapt the material from the booklet to their own family. It takes the pressure off everyone by allowing the child to choose the topic of conversation, directed by the tokens. The topic chosen gives everyone a starting point for conversation, and motivates family members to talk with each other with five to ten minutes of undivided attention.

Wise Talk for Families brings the family together to enjoy each other’s company and share stories.

Wise Talk for Families is a game to guide adults and children through a meaningful, heartfelt conversation. Wise Talk for Families inspires the words and wisdom to connect with your child.

Imagine…

a moment for you and your child to share You’re heard… your child feels heard You’re valued… your child feels her value You matter… your child feels he matters You’re loved… your child has love and is inspired to share it For more information and to order visit

www.wiseinside.com.au

Australian Family Magazine

Reskilling parentlife

Returning to work after completing your family - it can both be a welcome distraction and a daunting proposition. Regardless of when women decide to return to the workforce after having children, finances, lifestyle changes and a need to re-identify with your professional self remain strong factors influencing the big question of when.

owever, for those mothers who make the decision to wait the full five years until after their last child is at school, some unique questions and challenges present themselves. Mums may opt not to resume work in their previous profession, or they may not be able to, as time away from the industry may signal problems in finding work. There might be problems with securing flexible working hours and there could be more demands on time, juggling professional working hours, household duties and after school activities.

But for some professions, that’s not enough. “If you’re an accountant and you haven’t practised for five years, then there’s going to be a skill gap. But, if you’re somebody who works in marketing and you can come up with ideas and ways you’ve managed to do fundraising initiatives, then maybe that’s something that you can still sell.”

Although statistics from the Australian Institute of Family Studies reveal more women than before are returning to the workforce before their child’s first birthday, the sentiments of parents polled in an AdelaideNow survey indicate that nearly 30% believe the mother should not return to the work force until their child is four or five. Rachel Perkins, director of Just Mums Recruitment, says they do work with a “solid group” of women who reflect this opinion, making the conscious decision to hold off returning to work to avoid “missing out” on the early years of their child’s life. Sarah Fotia is one such mother, returning to work after a period of eight years caring for her daughter, nearly eight and son, six. “I always wanted to be a stay-at-home mum until my kids started school,” says Fotia. “I didn’t want to have my kids looked after by anybody else. I wanted to be there for the five or six years of my children growing up,” she says of the pre-meditated decision Fotia and her husband took before the birth of their first child. While there might be satisfaction that you’ve been able to gift your children parental time by bringing them up for the first four or five years of their life, there might also be challenges for the ultimate return to work, especially if there is no evidence of progression through volunteering, taking on additional study or other initiatives, says Sally-Anne Blanshard, director and career coach at nourishcoaching. com.au. Depending on the role, employers would like to see how you’ve managed to maintain and improve your communication, relationship management and organisation skills, she says.

Australian Family Magazine

Whilst on parenting duties, it’s a good idea to keep in touch with developments in your profession. Keep contact with your workmates, says Perkins. “Your former manager or colleagues are in the best position to update you on any significant changes within the business,” she says. “Reading industry specific magazines or journals, following particular companies or professional associations via social media and keeping abreast of news in the market are also worthwhile,” adds Perkins.

motherhood Enrolling in part-time courses, whether it be a short program at TAFE or a degree at university is a great way to up-skill during the parenting leave period, advises Blanshard. These further study options also provide the perfect base for women to reinvent themselves professionally or look at turning their hobbies and interests into profitable opportunities. Exploring such avenues and setting up what’s known as a ‘portfolio career’- where you earn money from one or more sources is also a viable option for those mothers who have spent an extended amount of time out of the workforce, says Blanshard. “You could be doing one day a week for your solicitor here and this bit of work for your husband there. I don’t think necessarily that employment is just a one-employer situation these days.” Additionally, easing yourself back into the “daily grind” in such ways could prove to be beneficial especially because of the physical and mental endurance anyone in any industry would require after a long period off work. These endurance levels also get tested when it comes to family time after work. While school children might allow you to be more autonomous by being able to bathe themselves, help with the laundry and cleaning up, there are other, school-specific challenges to contend with for those mums who return to work when kids are at school. Homework, the shorter hours of school, after-school activities and the need to supervise them for two weeks every term of the year can cause a few more headaches than for those with younger children not in formal education. Setting up a care strategy by enlisting help from your partner, family or after school/vacation care is essential as is communicating with your employer about the need to take holidays or work shorter hours, says Blanshard. According to the Fair Work Act, the right to request parttime work ends when the child reaches school age and unless the position is an advertised part-time role, seeking flexible working hours might prove to be quite difficult. It is here where your negotiation skills can be exercised, says Blanshard. Working from home or finishing up tasks after business hours are some examples of what you could offer up, she adds. Although the financial costs associated with a mother returning to work is often discussed when younger children attend private childcare, with school aged children, the

parentlife

costs are deemed much less, says Perkins. However, the added costs of after school care, school excursions, books and ‘working lunches’ are some accumulative expenses that need to be taken into account, especially when given the opportunity to be selective about the employment undertaken. Salary is one factor that can enable you to pick and choose and even negotiate on, says Perkins. However, negotiating with your employer about your salary may not be a very strong argument especially if you haven’t added to your professional skills or experience during the maternity leave period. Following supervision, training and development to get you to the level you used to work at previously, a formal pay review after performing your role effectively for 6 months might be a better proposition, she advises. As diverse as these challenges may seem, the one thing that unites women when it comes to returning to work, regardless of whether they do so when their child is six months old or six years old is the element of uncertainty of how they will perform in the workplace. Fotia used to seriously question how she could do anything else other than raise children after being a stay-at-home mum for eight years. “I felt dumb after being at home for eight years and asked myself ‘who’s going to give me a job?’”. Backing herself, relying on her experience as a parent helper in classrooms and the desire to do something for herself meant she was able to highlight the good qualities she would bring in a role as a cafe assistant and just “went for it”. The job has given Fotia a new lease in life. “I have lost eight kilos in the four weeks I’ve been at work. I’ve changed my diet, I do a lot more exercise, I have a lot more energy and I’m a whole new person. I have comments from everybody at school saying how good I look, so, going back to work has really boosted up my confidence.” Perkins sees a better, fair and stress-free future for those mums who do wait until their child has reached school age to return to work. Improved diversity and flexible work practices at workplaces, promises of better support for parents seeking supervision outside of school hours and government lobbying to create more awareness will ensure these mums make a smoother transition to the workforce, she says. af Sources: Australian Institute of Family Studies - http://www.aifs.gov.au/ institute/pubs/factssheets/2013/familytrends/aft1/ AdelaideNow survey results - http://www.news.com.au/business/ worklife/less-than-a-third-of-mums-say-they-dont-want-to-bepressured-to-return-to-work/story-e6frfm9r-122647609126

Australian Family Magazine

Familylife

The Big move by Jennifer Morton

Moving house is a difficult time even if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re just moving across town. So what happens when your family moves to another state?

here is more to shifting house than finding a new space and packing up some boxes. There are many things to consider when deciding to uproot and resettle in a new town and state. Leaving the old and starting anew can be frightening to children and adults alike. Consider all the changes involved: jobs, activities, costs of living, landscapes, infrastructure, climates, time zones, ideas, friends, childcare centres, schools and teachers. Statistics show that more than 80,000 children move interstate each year. In the past, each state had their own education curriculum and they didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t always gel with

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each other. These differences added to a childâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sense of disconnection that comes with being the new kid on the block. Not only did they have to adjust to a new hometown and try to fit in, they had to adjust to a standard of teaching at variance to which they were accustomed. The drive to a national curriculum has been influenced in part by this. The education system is one thing and potentially a big concern but many experts agree that the hardest thing for moving families is forming new relationships and their attitude towards it all.

familylife Sue Ellson, founder of The Newcomers Network (www. newcomersnetwork.com.au) says that it’s families’ expectations that determine the level of difficulty they will face after moving to a place. “It’s not the distance that matters, it is the expectations people have. If they expected it to be challenging, it will be ok. But if they expected it to be easy, then it will be more difficult,” she said. Ellson has conducted extensive research since 1999 on the challenges families face when being new to a town. She learned first hand how certain attitudes can be detrimental to the newbie when she moved from Adelaide to Melbourne and left her career and immediate family behind. “I did not expect it to be challenging because I was Australian and I spoke English. I thought, ‘how difficult could it be?’.

Moving considerations Peace Mitchell shifted her family of five (six since July 2013) to Victoria from Far North Queensland last summer. The move was initiated when her 12-year-old son was accepted to the Australian Ballet School. The Mitchell family decided that Peace and the kids would move while Dad would stay behind temporarily to remain at his job and deal with other responsibilities while he looked for a new position in Melbourne. She says it was a big decision for the family but it was worth it to see her son so happy. It wasn’t long after settling though when her middle child showed signs of anxiety. “I was feeling vulnerable and worried about going into labour early with nobody here to help. I had a large support network back home that was now far away. There were some extra fears that were normally not there, so I think he was picking up on that. He was also missing our dog, who sadly, could not come with us.” Peace and her family had to downsize considerably after their shift from a rural town to the inner city. “It’s so much more expensive in Melbourne. We’ve gone from our own

Six strategies for a new start www.newcomersnetwork.com.au ● Find a friend ● Collect local information ● Try new things ● Expect a challenge ● Create new routines ● Ask questions

three bedroom, two bath house overlooking the ocean to a tiny two bedroom flat in the inner city because anything else is too dear,” she says. Financial pressures that coincide with an interstate move are often overlooked. Aside from the moving of material things, inevitabally there will be other costs such as hotel stays, travel, take-away food, new school uniforms, climatesuitable clothing, utility hook-ups and changes to the costs of living. After much research, Peace discovered that it would work out the same to sell off all their old furniture and buy new rather than hire movers. “I sold all of our stuff, everything from cutlery to furniture and when we arrived in Melbourne, we went shopping and bought everything new,” she says. When single mother, Lori Dwyer was in the process of moving from New South Wales to Victoria with her two young children to start a new life in a new realtionship, she had mixed emotions about it. She’s candid and honest about her life and feelings on her blog, RRSAHM and admits that she is unsure whether the move is awesome or terrifying. “The reality of what I am about to do has suddenly kicked in. I’m not sure if my kids and I are prepared to live so far away from our family and the people we love. I keep reminding myself that we will be fine,” she says. Although Lori has spoken openly to her children about moving and has told them about Melbourne, she cannot help feel that taking them away from what they know and love, is selfish. “I know it will be hard but I’m hoping for a better life, for all of us,” she says.

Making connections Dr Justin Coulson, a Sydney-based parenting expert and author of What your child needs from you: Creating a connected family says the biggest challenge families face after a move has to do with relationships. Coulson suggests taking the temperament of your children into account when moving. “Parents have this attitude that ‘the kids will be fine, they’ll bounce back’, but in my experience children and adults find creating new relationships and friendships to be really challenging. When a child walks into a new classroom, it’s one against 30. Introverts will be more challenged than extroverts,” he says. Moving house brings a great deal of unpredictability. As well as familiar routines, Coulson says social support is key and the sooner a family can integrate themselves into the community the better. “Children thrive when they feel secure and when life is predictable. Whether it is through the school, a mother’s group, sports or a church, wherever you can create a sense Australian Family Magazine

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familylife Tips for moving families: ● If possible, visit the new location before moving. ● Include the children in decision making. ● Let them pack a box of their special things to have during travel and upon arrival to the new home. ● Consider your children’s temperament when dealing with emotions. ● Make it a fun adventure. ● Be friendly within your new community.

of community and develop relationships, that’s where you will find a sense of stability,” he says. Relationship counsellor Susie Tuckwell runs a private practice in Sydney where she specialises in counselling families who have moved to the city from another state or country. She says that many of her clients arrive to their new home lacking the skills and experience they need to make new connections. “If a family is well-known in their hometown and they move to a new place where they don’t know anyone, they suddenly become obscure. They never had to make new connections and friends because everyone knew them and they were important. Now they have to prove themselves and it can be very hard,” she says. Making an effort to get to know your neighbours and community can make the transition period shorter. Tuckwell says that it takes extra energy to put yourself out there but reminds us how a smile and friendly hello will often be welcome, especially by shy types. “If you are shy or introverted, it’s going to be tiring. You have to accept that it will take time. One thing I suggest is to look around for the other quiet or shy persons sitting alone at the childcare centre or mother’s group and approach them. They’ll often be very grateful,” she says. People want to be liked and respected and love to be appreciated. “People like to be liked. Go out of your way to find something likeable about the people you meet; say nice things to them. Thank them for the party invitation. Gratitude is a very pleasing way to connect to people,” Tuckwell says.

The way forward Louise Glendon is a military wife and mother of two girls aged five and six. The Glendon family are very experienced movers with postings to the USA and five different Australian states in the past seven years. Louise says she had to get

over the fear of making friends early on and now they have friends all over. “I had to let go of the fear of making friends, so I would ask women if they’d like to have coffee and a play date. Through all our moves we have kept in contact with good friends and we try to visit them when we get a chance. We fill our photo albums and the kids love looking back through them and talking about their friends that they’ve made in different towns. We’re planning a five week trip next year and we’ll be visiting lots of friends.The kids are really looking forward that,” she says. KidsMatter is a mental health and wellbeing framework for early childhood education and primary schools. Their website says “research shows that children who are mentally healthy are better able to meet life’s challenges. They are also better learners and have stronger relationships.” Community psychologist and National Project Manager for KidsMatter Primary at the Australian Psychological Society Dr Lyn O’Grady says that children’s mental health is important. “We never used to think about children and mental health but now we’re aware of the importance of it. We know that the experiences they have as children will certainly have an impact on how they develop into adults,” she says. Life is full of challenges, we all know that. There are several ways parents can help their children be mentally healthy now and in the future. “Listening, teaching, supporting, encouraging and being there for them will instil confidence and a sense of belonging,” O’Grady says. Coulson urges parents to openly communicate with their children about their feelings. “Engage with the emotions they are experiencing. Don’t dismiss their feelings. If your child is scared, talk about it and let them know it is normal. Give the emotion a name. Find solutions with them,” he says. Six months in and reunited with Dad, the Mitchell family have settled in nicely. Peace is happy to report that her boys are doing better than ever in school and they are all making new friends. “There have been lots of positives around schooling. Their classes are smaller and they’re all doing much better. It’s taken some time but the boys are making friends and going for plays, and getting party invites’. ‘I think we’re closer as a family. We have a whole new state to explore and we’ve been taking weekend trips and spending more time together. It’s been great and any initial struggle’s been worth it,’ she says. af

Sources www.happyfamilies.com.au www.kidsmatter.edu.au www.newcomersnetwork.com www.susietuckwell.com.au www.rrsahm.com

Australian Family Magazine

Kidsminds

School culture By Brooke Lumsden

Finding the right school for your child is important.

his process can bring a barrage of conflicting messages about what aspects of a school are going to benefit children the most, often with a focus on tangible areas such as sporting facilities, classroom technology and NAPLAN results. With the significant shift in modern educational thinking however, the impact of school culture is increasingly being recognised for the critical role it plays in shaping our children socially, emotionally, and academically.

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Andrew Fuller, author of ‘Tricky Kids’ and ‘Tricky Teens’ and a clinical psychologist who works with schools in Australia and overseas, explains that school culture is created by the way students, staff, parents and the leadership come together. “So when you get a school culture that is positive, it’s very powerful in terms of wellbeing and engagement.” he explains. Nicole Molloy, principal of Daceyville Public School in Sydney

Kidsminds has worked hard with her teachers and leadership team to improve their culture since arriving at the school in 2011. A major part of this shift has been replacing school rules with core values, which state ‘Our school is safe. We respect each other as life long learners’. “Our core values engender a positive school culture and they inform everything we do.” Nicole says. “School rules are just something we impose on kids. We’re telling them that this is the way you should behave, not actually teaching them a positive way of living, and not embedding those ways of thinking in them as people.” Nicole says she is passionate about this approach because it instils values for the kids to live by – in the school environment, in the home environment and beyond, for their whole life. “We’ve got that responsibility to teach them how to live as positive citizens. Rules don’t do that, they are specific to that circumstance. They don’t teach kids any kind of longevity in how to be positive, active, informed, productive citizens. If we can do that now for our kids, hopefully we’re setting them up for life.”

A matter of learning Principals Australia Institute also has an overarching approach to creating school cultures beneficial to students and school communities as a whole. It supports two initiatives that focus on student wellbeing and building a positive school community: KidsMatter Primary for primary schools and MindMatters for secondary schools. “We’re focused on what we call a whole-school approach” says Jeremy Hurley, National Coordinator, KidsMatter Primary. “If you set the foundations right in primary school, kids carry that with them into secondary school. More importantly, if we teach kids the right foundation blocks – like how to be resilient, self-aware and empathetic - we set them up for life,” The KidsMatter Framework, fully funded by the Commonwealth Government, provides primary schools with a whole-school approach to the development of the social, emotional and mental health of children. “In essence, it is about supporting the school to establish the conditions - culture, ethos, relationships, and values which maximise the opportunities for children to flourish, and to ensure that school planning, policies and practices sustain these conditions. Those who work in schools would be aware that these are also the conditions within which learning is optimised.” explains Jeremy. Nicole says an important factor in the success of these principles is finding effective and practical ways to implement them at the classroom level. “We’re educators, we know how to teach, but we don’t always make that leap between academic teaching and social and emotional teaching. We

know we have to do it but need to look at how to make it happen in a way that kids will connect with.” she explains.

Leading by example The belief in this approach by staff is essential to its success. In order to cultivate a positive environment, such values must be modelled. “When we looked at positive behaviour for learning, we looked at what our interactions are across the whole school community. It’s not just how the kids are treating each other or their teachers, it’s how the teachers are interacting with each other too.” says Nicole. “As anyone who has ever worked in a school knows, effective leadership is essential for the school community to embrace different ways of doing business.” Jeremy explains. “KidsMatter is about doing business differently, and is typically driven by a group within the school that includes the school principal or deputy, school staff, parents and carers. School change is much more likely to be successful where the school principal is actively supportive and engaged.” Andrew says that the role of the parents in setting a school culture is also significant, explaining that parents need to consider the message they are sending to the school about what they feel is most important. “Parents need to think about if they want to push for more homework and more awards nights, or do they want every child to be responsible, included and successful.” he says.

Making it work The fostering of a positive environment from the top down takes a very detailed approach. “It’s taking a framework about looking at behaviour and student wellbeing from a teaching point of view. We’ve got a responsibility as educators not to expect a positive culture just to appear, because it won’t naturally, but we have to actually create it and teach kids how to be part of it. It’s not just relying on having put these structures and policies in place, therefore it’ll be a lovely environment, it doesn’t happen that way.” asserts Nicole. Nicole worked with students on a new rewards system, understanding their need for extrinsic as well as intrinsic motivation. While there is a consistent points system in place, and praise from teachers is already ingrained, Nicole and her staff are in the process of enhancing this with simple but valuable measures such as ‘good news’ postcards and phone calls home to inform parents of their children’s positive achievements and contributions at school.

Dealing with conflict While problems are inevitably going to arise, having a structured, positive environment and a common language through such things as core values, it is easier to address and overcome problems. “When things go wrong around the school, which they do in any school, it is a way of having Australian Family Magazine

Kidsminds a constructive, productive conversation about how we can move it on in a positive way.” Nicole explains. Previous to this shift in thinking, Nicole says there would be frustration among teachers when kids would continuously repeat negative behaviours. “The problem was we hadn’t actually taught them what it means to solve conflict, for example, in a way that means they’ll respond differently next time, we’ve just told them it’s wrong.” Andrew advises that while no school can avoid bullying, it’s important for parents to consider the school’s approach to prevention as well as management. He says that it is most important to ask the school how they help new kids make friends, because schools that are clear on how they help kids to get along are going to minimise bullying. Another important aspect along these lines is the school’s sense of inclusiveness.

When problems do arise, however, working together is the key. “We know that bullying involves about one in five students at any one time. There’s a group of kids who will try out bullying as part of their social world and we need to educate them out of it. It’s most powerful when parents and teachers work together to help not only the students being bullied but those who are doing the bullying to overcome it.” Andrew explains.

What to look for With changing dynamics, Andrew says to consider that school cultures will have a rough patch if they’re functioning reactively rather than proactively. However good school

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leaders will pause to think about what their main aims are and realise they need to be intentional about creating positive relationships, and how they develop the students – asking themselves “Are we giving the kids a sense of success and mastery?” “A positive school community isn’t measured by NAPLAN results.” Jeremy says. “It’s about the welcome you get when you walk into a school. It’s about the way staff and students

It’s most powerful when parents and teachers work together to help not only the students being bullied but those who are doing the bullying to overcome it

speak. It’s about how much parent engagement happens in the school. And what we are finding is that when all these things are in place, students learn and grow better. So one thing any parent can do when selecting a school for their child is to look for one that nurtures a positive school community.” Andrew advises taking a walk around to get a feel not only for the school, but also for the people inside it. Having worked with so many schools, he has experience at identifying those teachers that will be a positive part of their students’ life. “You can tell a good teacher because their eyes smile at you. They might be tired and busy but their imagination and their hearts are open.” af

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Australian Family Magazine

Kidslearning

Mathsmatters By Emma Reeves

To follow a recipe, do the shopping, manage a budget or even understand a bill, we need numerical skills.

ut ask a group of children what they think about mathematics and you will hear comments such as “I don’t like it,” or “It’s too hard.” Ask a group of adults and you will likely hear similar responses. Perhaps it’s hardly surprising then that many Australians may not have adequate numerical skills. Findings from an ABS study released earlier this year indicated that 8.9 million Australians, or 55%, were assessed at level one or two numeracy skills. This means that they were at the lowest levels of competence. Poor numerical skills, or the way we understand and use mathematics in our lives, can have far reaching consequences. Children who are skilled in literacy and numeracy find it easier to participate in society. They are also more likely to stay longer in school and to later earn higher wages. Adults who have poor numeracy may have “restricted career and study options and a lack of understanding of important life skills, such as finance,” says Professor Peter Sullivan, Professor of Science, Mathematics and Technology Education at Monash University. Most jobs require some sort of proficiency with numerical skills. This could be as simple as providing the correct change to a customer or the higher level calculations found in professions such as engineering, accounting or medicine.

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So good numeracy, like literacy, adds up to giving children a better chance in many aspects of their lives. There are some simple strategies parents can use to foster their children’s numeracy. One of the best ways is for parents to simply interact with their children in ways that help them quantify their world says Professor Sullivan. It’s about “having conversations and using quantitative type words so kids become engaged in the world in that way. Some children are interested in

cooking and some in measurement, so engage with your kids one on one.” For young children this is as simple as counting the steps as you go up a stairway, or sorting cutlery or blocks into different colour or shape piles. For older children parents can use more sophisticated mathematical language and concepts. This could be focussing on directions and orientation (opposite, north, south, reading a map), measurement (distances or weighing cooking ingredients) and talking about the time of day or the speed of a vehicle.

Kidslearning So, just as parents and carers are often told to read to their children to create a solid basis for developing literacy, parents can help to create understanding of mathematics by using terms about space and number. “It is a natural thing to quantify the world,” says Professor Sullivan. Professor Sullivan also encourages adults to play games with their children that foster mathematical thinking. For example, use board games that involve dice or counting forwards on squares. And let’s not forget about the numerous apps available – the latest of which comes from the developers of Mathletics. Skoolbo is an integrated game which focuses on both literacy and numeracy. Targeting Maths 3 is developed by the Reading Eggs team. Professor Sullivan believes that instilling self belief and confidence in their own abilities is one of the most important aspects of developing mathematical skills. Many parents themselves in their own school years may have had difficulty with mathematic concepts, but Professor Sullivan cautions against telling their children that mathematics is too hard or not important. Children are far more likely to do well and enjoy mathematics if they are surrounded by others who have a positive attitude to the subject. To make matters more complicated, schools do not teach the same mathematical methods that parents were taught. Remember “carry the one”!? Some mathematical techniques, particularly in multiplication and division, have changed over the years so parents may feel they lack the knowledge to assist their children. A key to improving children’s mathematical skills is engaging them in the curriculum. Most children will get more out of a subject when they can see how it directly relates to them and their everyday lives. For example, children might use shapes

and measuring to produce a piece of artwork. “The Australian education system may not be doing it optimally to capture children’s interests. The problem is for students to see mathematics as connected and part of the world, not isolated things learnt one at a time. It’s more engaging for children to see how things are used in the real world,” says Professor Sullivan. One of the easiest ways to make numbers relevant is through money. Professor Sullivan encourages parents to let their children handle money so they can learn financial skills. Most people will fairly easily see a connection between sound numerical skills and the ability to manage money. It’s also a subject of almost universal interest and financial literacy units have been incorporated into the Australian Curriculum. Money Smart is an initiative of the Australian Government and has many resources for parents and teachers to help improve the financial literacy of children and teens - http://teaching.moneysmart.gov.au/ In an age where money is rapidly becoming “invisible” with the rise of technologies such as online shopping and banking, the ability to understand money and make informed financial judgements is clearly important. Children also need to be made aware of increasingly sophisticated financial scams. One of the most common ways that children learn about financial management is through handling their own money. A survey by the Commonwealth Bank earlier this year revealed that nearly 80% of Australian children receive pocket money, starting at an average age of six years. Most parents provided pocket money through a desire for their children to learn the value of money by “earning” their pocket money through jobs. Mother of three, Danielle, says her children receive a weekly allowance.

“We definitely wanted to make them work for the money. I don’t believe they should receive money for nothing.” However, she says that there have been times that pocket money has been “suspended” when the children do not seem motivated enough to do their jobs adequately. Danielle also believes that there are certain household chores that should be performed as an expectation rather than a chance to earn pocket money. “Jobs like cleaning their rooms the kids should just have to do, I don’t believe they should be paid for them.” Danielle is also keen for her children to learn how to save money. “If they spend it on something and then it’s gone, then tough, they have to learn that they can’t just always ask for more money when they want it,” she says. Mother of four, Caroline says she deliberately uses pocket money as a vehicle to encourage saving habits. “We give them $2 per week which is a reduced amount in order to teach them money management skills. Once they have accumulated certain amounts they are allowed to spend it on something worthwhile.” Real life experiences such as negotiating, ordering and paying at a shop and making judgements over what is value for money help prepare children for financial independence. Danielle recalls an occasion when her son had saved to buy a helicopter toy that proved to be faulty. “He played with it for half an hour and then it just stopped working. So we then had to go back to the shop and ask for a refund.” “Numeracy is important not only for the people who are studying high level mathematics, but for active citizenry. We can interpret the world in so many quantitative ways. Such is the case with financial literacy,” says Professor Sullivan. af Resources www.educationequals.com - dedicated to enabling and encouraging parents to raise mathematically confident children.

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familynutrition

Food for

thought By Emma Reeves

Our bodies, like our personalities are all different. Foods that might nourish one child can cause serious problems for another.

igraines, digestive problems, asthma and behavioural issues can all be caused by food intolerances. Commonly, food intolerances are often not diagnosed until the symptoms become unbearable. “Often people don’t talk about it and think their symptoms are normal. They just grow used to being moody, having nightmares, tummy pains or other

symptoms,” says Georgie Rist from the Dieticians Association of Australia. Desperation led Jenny Ravlic to consider food intolerance as the cause of her three young sons’ chronic behavioural issues. “When our sons were two, four, and six years old they just couldn’t play together without pushing and screaming,” she says. On top of this her eldest son was “out of control” in the classroom.

Jenny’s family ended up doing an elimination diet. She credits this decision with turning her children’s lives around. “The kids completely changed. Within days, they could sit on the same chair and play games together - we never looked back. Now we’ve worked out what they can eat and how much,” she says.

Australian Family Magazine

familynutrition An elimination diet involved excluding foods which might be causing her children’s behavioural issues for a number of weeks. This included removing artificial preservatives, food colourings, flavour enhancers and foods high in salicylates (found in plant products). Afterwards, suspect foods were reintroduced and reactions carefully monitored. Within Jenny’s family a number of food intolerances, mainly caused by food additives, were identified. An unexpected result of the diet was that Jenny also found she had a range of food intolerances. Removing the food that was causing problems changed Jenny’s family life for the better. However, it now means that her family adheres to a modified diet. “Occasionally we have something with additives in it but we usually pay for it later, by having fights or feeling terrible,” she says. Jenny was so inspired by the positive changes within her family that she now spreads the news to others. She works as the Melbourne Contact for the Food Intolerance Network, a forum on food additives (appropriately named FEDUP - http://fedup.com.au/ ) Georgie says it is important that parents who suspect their children have a food intolerance seek appropriate medical advice. She says an elimination diet should only be conducted under supervision from an accredited practising dietician. “Once you have seen a doctor and ruled out any other causes of symptoms, the first line of treatment is to eliminate all potential chemicals and substances that might cause a reaction. They can have a cumulative effect, so we put patients on a low chemical diet and then reintroduce foods which may cause a reaction. Once we identify foods, we can play around with doses, and find out what they can tolerate,” says Georgie. Jenny agrees it is important to seek specialist help, rather than simply

Australian Family Magazine

cutting out nutritious foods. “We had already started the elimination diet. But we went to a dietician to make sure our kids were getting the right diet with enough calcium, fibre and so on.” Dieticians who suspect food intolerance will vary the length of time an elimination diet is required. “An individual could be on it for two to six weeks. We are essentially waiting for a change/improvement and them you retrial one chemical, one suspect food,” explains Georgie. Like Jenny’s family, it is common for multiple family members to have food intolerances. However, symptoms may manifest in different ways. “One member of the family will have asthma. Someone else might have irritable bowel syndrome. It’s whatever part of your body is most sensitive. It’s how your body reacts,” says Georgie.

intolerance lack an enzyme which breaks down the lactose. Symptoms are triggered by drinking products such as milk, which contain lactose. They include digestive upsets such as stomach pain and diarrhoea. The intolerance is alleviated when lactose is avoided. Georgie says that in children food intolerances can also be exhibited by mood changes and sleep disruption. “Less common is a fluctuation in energy, vivid dreams and mouth ulcers,” she says. Georgie urges families to seek specialist help if they believe there is a problem. “If you suspect something is not quite right with your child, you need to see your doctor and rule out any other contributing medical conditions.”

Georgie, who has a particular expertise in genetics and food intolerances, explains “intolerance is essentially a build Families also need to up of the chemical understand the difference in the body, up to a certain threshold between a food allergy and a that tips the food intolerance individual over. You and I might have two different thresholds As a result of her experience, Jenny for fructose intolerance for example. I believes parents should rule out food might be able to tolerate an apple a intolerances before medicating their day or you might have one bite and children for behavioural issues. that would tip you over the edge.” Families also need to understand the difference between a food allergy and a food intolerance. “An allergy is when our immune system reacts against food proteins. It detects them as a foreign body,” explains Georgie. Anaphylaxis is an extreme allergic reaction which can be life threatening. Other allergic symptoms include swelling, itchy rashes, severe stomach pains and diarrhoea. The most common food allergens are shellfish, cow’s milk, soy, wheat, peanuts and tree nuts. In contrast, a food intolerance is a reduced ability to break down or digest food. For example, people with lactose

The most common food intolerances are lactose intolerance and Coeliac Disease (gluten intolerance). Medical procedures can be used to screen for a genetic disposition to both these conditions. Salicylates, which occur in plant foods, can also be a relatively common intolerance. Coeliac Disease is generally regarded to be the most serious intolerance. Gluten is a protein found in wheat, rye barley and oats. This means it forms a major part of the western diet, being found in breads, breakfast cereals and pastas. It’s important to keep in mind that although children can be born with a predisposition for the disease, they

familynutrition may not develop it until later. Scarily, the average time frame from onset to identification of Coeliac Disease is ten years. The symptoms of Coeliac Disease vary considerably. Some people suffer severe symptoms, while others are relatively symptom free. Coeliac Australia (http://www.coeliac.org.au/) advises that further investigation for Coeliac Disease should occur if one or more high risk features are present. These include vitamin deficiencies, weight loss and chronic gastrointestinal symptoms such as diarrhoea. “If it is left undiagnosed Coeliac Disease increases the risk of certain types of cancers,” says Georgie. Because it promotes several nutrient deficiencies, and diabetes, it can particularly affect the growth and development of children. Georgie says “At the end of the day I do believe we know our bodies best, if you feel something is not right make sure you get it investigated. Once you identify the cause or trigger it helps empower and bring back quality of life to the child.” Some mothers report that their children refuse foods they cannot tolerate. However, Georgie says food refusal should not be relied upon as an indicator of food intolerance. “They often use food intake as power and control within the family,” she says. There may be a host of reasons why a child might refuse a particular food. If parents suspect a food intolerance it is important to diagnose and treat the problem. “The key thing to remember is that we are a product of our environment and early years in life. Our eating behaviour as a child often sets us up for life,” says Georgie. af

Where to get help Dieticians Association of Australia www.daa.asn.au Coeliac Australia - www.coeliac.org.au Fed Up - www.fedup.com.au

Educating Palates Healthy Food for Growing Minds and Bodies – a guide for families & childcare centres By Tony Sharpe The idea of educating a palate is so obvious, so simple - yet so overlooked when it comes to feeding the family. Author Tony Sharpe has been at the pointy end (no pun intended!) of feeding young children for nearly 20 years as the owner of a long day care centre in the Blue Mountains. Over the years, in a setting blessed by its natural bush surroundings, Tony established an organic veggie garden, composted with a worm farm and added Bantam chickens to the mix. During that time he developed a range of healthy recipes he knew from experience that children will eat and more importantly, enjoy! Those recipes focus on low GI, use wholefoods and avoid preservatives and additives. In his fore word Tony says, “My approach to food is not about being strict and having no treats, but rather about having healthier options, balanced diets and eating some foods in moderation. It’s about trying to use raw ingredients as opposed to packaged foods. Substituting unhealthy options for healthier ones. My aim in writing Educating Palates is to give adults a simple tool to positively enhance the mental and physical development of their children. Developing a child’s palate will not only create smarter, healthier and happier children, but will also help bring families together at meal times, lower preparation times and lower ingredient costs. Children’s developing minds and bodies are at the mercy of what they are being fed...you get back what you put in.” As word spread, Tony Sharpe took on the role of teaching basic nutrition, menu planning and safe food handling to other child care centres, and then travelled throughout NSW facilitating workshops. Educating Plates is the result of requests for simple recipes that anyone can cook. All of the recipes in the book provide quantities for four to six people, as well as quantities for 30 children. Recipes note possible allergies and suggest alternative ingredients; the range and variety of food means bland is banned – adults and children are offered a vast selection of delicious recipes that are flavoursome and rely on herbs, spices and combinations of real food for flavour. www.educatingpalates.com

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familysafety

safe by

the seaside g summer holiday, headi ng to th r a lon o p e i A y u d n s t a ralians k c m i u q r a r . Whether it’s fo e fo m i t s Visit Cancer Council Australia for more a beach is a national p information on sun protection and UV levels (www.cancer.org.au).

Fast facts about Sunscreens • Sunscreens containing titanium dioxide or zinc oxide protect you by reflecting UV rays. • Sunscreens containing ingredients like cinnamates, benzophenones and salicylates protect you by absorbing UV rays.

o one wants their seaside adventure to turn nasty, so you and your family should be mindful of other safety measures apart from swimming between the flags. Here is some information on common beach injuries; what to do and when to seek help if you do end up lobster red from sunburn - or on the wrong side of a sea urchin.

Too much sun isn’t fun Everyone needs some sunshine for good health. For example, most of the vitamin D in your body is produced when your skin is exposed to ultraviolet (UV) rays from the sun. Vitamin D is important for bone health. Too much sunshine, however, can damage your skin. Visible damage, like sunburn, is caused by a type of UV radiation called UVB, while long-term invisible damage (think premature aging) is caused by UVA rays. Both types of UV have been linked to skin cancers.

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Protect yourself Choosing a broad-spectrum, waterresistant sunscreen with a high sun protection factor (e.g. SPF 30) will help protect you and your family from the harmful effects of both types of UV radiation, but should not be your only form of protection. Cancer Council Australia recommends that sunscreens be used along with other sun-protection measures such as:

• wearing a hat and protective clothing (cool cotton shirts with long sleeves or a ‘rashie’ in the water) • wear only sunglasses labelled AS/ NZS 1067 provide correct protection from harmful UV rays. • drinking plenty of water to prevent dehydration

• Sunscreens can be used at any age. Most brands of sunscreen will have baby or toddler formulas that are as effective, but more suitable for young, sensitive skins. Always test the sunscreen on a small patch of skin first to make sure there is no reaction.

• Sunscreen should be applied to dry skin 20 minutes before going into the sun. Reapply every 2 hours while outdoors (or more frequently if swimming or sweating).

If you do get burnt Although there’s no fast-fix for sunburn, there are actions you can take to help ease the discomfort. Apply cool water compresses or soak in a cool bath — don’t put ice on burns.

• keeping under shade as much as possible (use an umbrella or beach hut)

Aloe vera based gels or creams can be soothing — avoid products containing alcohol as these can further dry out skin.

• staying out of the sun when the UV index is 3 or higher (usually the middle of the day).

Over-the-counter pain relievers containing paracetamol or ibuprofen may help ease the pain of sunburn.

familysafety It can take 12 to 24 hours to feel the full extent and severity of sunburn, and several days for your skin to start healing. If you have severe sunburn, see a doctor, especially if the area is blistered and very painful, if you feel nauseated or have a bad headache.

Feeling hot hot hot In addition to sunburn, staying in the sun or heat for long periods of time can cause the body to overheat, which can lead to heat exhaustion. Heat exhaustion is a serious condition that can develop into heat stroke (also called sun stroke), which is a medical emergency and requires urgent medical attention (see table below). Babies, children and the elderly are more susceptible, but even fit young people can become very unwell.

Things that make you go ouch Heat-related problems are not the only potential danger at the beach. Step unwittingly on an oyster shell or swim into a bluebottle, and you’ll be leaving with more than wet towels and sandy feet! Fortunately, many unintentional encounters with ocean creatures are minor and will only require simple first aid, although there are some exceptions. Always seek medical advice if you are

Heat exhaustion

Heat stroke

stung or bitten in the water, as it’s often impossible to know what has stung you and how poisonous it might be. The senior surf life saving guard on duty should be qualified in first aid, so seek help with them first. You may need futher medical treatment, so it’s always better to be safe than sorry.

First aid for bites and stings Below are tips on how to manage some of the more common injuries that can occur while at the beach.

• Bluebottles: Contrary to popular belief, vinegar is not helpful for bluebottle stings; instead you should remove any tentacles and wash the area with sea water (not fresh water). • Sea urchins and venomous fish: Remove any spines close to the surface of skin and clean the wound. See a doctor to make sure you have removed everything.

• Sting ray: Always stop any bleeding and calm the injured person. Importantly, do not remove any spine that may be embedded. Any injury should be treated as a medical emergency. To ease the pain of minor stingray, sea urchin, venomous fish and bluebottle injuries, soak the affected area in hot water (as hot as you can comfortably tolerate) for up to 90 minutes.

If pain continues, an over-the-counter pain reliever containing paracetamol or ibuprofen may help.

• Coral or oyster shell cuts: Make sure to clean any wound or cut from coral or oyster shell thoroughly, to prevent infection. Seek medical advice to make sure there is no risk of infection. Always call 000 for an ambulance if:

• any injury worsens, or if the person seems to be getting worse instead of better • there is uncontrolled bleeding – particularly if the wound is in the chest or stomach area • someone

is having difficulty breathing, if their lips or tongue are swelling, if they’re acting confused, or have severe pain

Need more help? In Australia, if you have concerns about a suspected poisoning, call the Poisons Information Centre on 13 11 26 any time.

About NPS MedicineWise From NPS MedicineWise, an independent, not-for-profit and evidence-based organisation funded by the Australian Government. For information about prescription, overthe-counter and complementary medicines see nps.org.au or call NPS Medicines Line on 1300 633 424. af

Signs and symptoms

What to do

Feeling hot, tired and weak Headache and nausea Thirst Pale, clammy, cool skin Feeling faint Muscle cramps

Lie person down in a cool place Loosen or remove clothing Cool with water or wet cloths Give cool water to drink only if conscious Seek medical advice

Body temp of 40°C or higher Headache, nausea, vomiting Flushed, dry skin Dizziness Visual disturbances Irritability, confusion Seizures or unconsciousness

Call an ambulance (000) Lie person down in a cool place If unconscious, place person on their side and clear their airway Remove most clothing Wet skin with water and fan to cool Apply cold packs or ice to neck, groin, armpits Give cool water to drink only if conscious Australian Family Magazine

Australian Family Magazine

Kidsdevelopment

To hold or not to hold Incontinence is one of Australia’s major health issues, with 4.8 million people aged 15 years and over (that’s one in five) affected. This statistic, combined with the fact that up to 30 per cent of children suffer from constipation - the main cause of faecal incontinence in children – makes it more critical than ever that we instil healthy bladder and bowel habits from an early age.

Toilet training The best time to get into good bladder and bowel habits is at toilet training stage, when children naturally mimic their parents and siblings. According to children’s continence nurse Clare Fyfield, also a continence advisor on the National Continence Helpline, children can sit on an adult toilet from about the age of 18 months. She suggests providing a children’s toilet seat insert and a foot stool so their knees are higher than their hips. Boys should also be encouraged to empty their bladder while sitting down, she says. “They see the rest of the family sitting on the toilet, so it makes sense they do too,” Ms Fyfield said. “It doesn’t matter if they’re not interested in doing anything,” . “The idea is that they become familiar with sitting on a toilet; that it’s not strange.” Toilet training is happening later and later, she said, as the use of pull-ups became more prevalent. “They’re convenient for mum but the child becomes used to the pull-ups and feels secure and doesn’t want to let go of them.”

Bed wetting By school age, most children are dry for most of the day, and about 20 per cent will wet the bed at night. “If they’re at around the age of five and still wetting the bed occasionally don’t worry too much,” Ms Fyfield said. As a first strategy, parents can adopt simple measures like giving children a big drink at breakfast in addition to their milk, and sending them to school with a drink bottle. “Give them plenty to drink in the morning and during the day so they don’t need to drink at night. And make sure they go to the toilet before going to bed,” she said. If children are still wetting the bed regularly by age of seven and are

themselves motivated to stop, a continence professional should be consulted, Ms Fyfield advises. The majority of children respond quickly to treatment at this age, and any medical conditions that exacerbate the problem can to be identified and treated.

Healthy bowels Once children are toilet trained, it is important they pay attention to their body’s urges to urinate or defecate. Whatever the reason they resist the urge to ‘go’ - they’re engrossed in play, put off by the public toilets or afraid of it hurting - holding on increases the likelihood of bladder and bowel problems, including incontinence. Strangely enough, the biggest culprit Australian Family Magazine

Kidsdevelopment for incontinence in children is constipation, which affects up to 30 per cent of children. While only five per cent of constipation cases are due to neurological disorders, the main cause is ignoring the urge to do a poo. You will know if your child is chronically constipated if they experience at least two of the following within an eightweek period:

• F ewer than three bowel motions a week • A t least one episode of faecal incontinence • T heir stool blocks the toilet plumbing • Withholding behaviour

“That’s when we have the gastro-colic reflex, which is a mass movement of the contents through the bowel,” she said. “Many people find this reflex is strongest in the morning, but most families are too busy in the morning and some children even have breakfast in the car, and so don’t get to go. “In the ideal world we would get up a bit earlier so our children have time to eat breakfast slowly, have a big drink, wait 20-30 minutes and then go to the toilet.”

increasing the risk of bacteria multiplying and the development of urinary tract infections. Just as importantly, children should not get into the habit of emptying their bladder ‘just in case’. Emptying a halffull bladder regularly can cause the bladder to lose its capacity to hold a normal amount of urine, which again, can increase the risk of incontinence. Mrs Armocida recommended children empty their bladders before going to bed, but for the rest of the time, only when they felt the urge. She reinforced Ms Fyfield’s advice that children – including boys until they were completely toilet trained - should be encouraged to sit leaning forward with their hands or elbows on their knees, and their feet well supported - whether emptying their bladder or bowel.

Painful defecation Maternal child health nurse and National Continence Helpline continence nurse advisor Janine Armocida said holding on only exacerbated constipation. “The longer the faeces remains in the colon, the harder it becomes as more liquid is absorbed into the body,” she said. Chronic constipation in a child has the potential to lead to soiling accidents that resembles diarrhoea, she said. “The faecal leakage can be mistaken for diarrhoea. Soft or liquid faeces can ooze past the solid faeces without the child knowing,” Mrs Armocida said. Just as strangely, constipation can cause wetting accidents. The full bowel can take up so much space in the pelvic region it compresses the bladder. As a result, children may have a sense of urgency to pass urine more often with an increased risk of wetting themselves before reaching the toilet.

She said these simple steps, along with a balanced diet that includes fresh fruit and vegetables, adequate water intake and plenty of exercise, were fundamental to bowel health.

Healthy bladders It is equally important children listen to their bladder’s call to go.

Parents can receive confidential advice about any issues related to their children’s bladder and bowel health from the National Continence Helpline (1800 33 00 66), which is staffed by continence nurse advisors and managed by the Continence Foundation of Australia. Parents are also encouraged to enquire about the Continence Foundation’s Healthy Bladder and Bowel Habits in Schools program, which aims to raise awareness of healthy bladder and bowel habits in Australian primary schools. Go to www.continence.org.au for more details. af References

Mrs Armocida said parents could help to prevent constipation by familiarising themselves with their child’s natural bowel patterns.

Resisting the urge to pass urine can have implications for their bladder’s health. If a bladder is constantly at maximum capacity it is more likely to leak on sudden movements. Regularly over-stretched, a bladder also runs the risk of become floppy and unable to empty effectively, causing decreased bladder sensation and thereby increasing the risk of incontinence.

Twenty minutes after a meal was a good time to ask a child to sit on the toilet.

The bladder should be fully emptied each time a child goes to the toilet. If not, the urine sits in the bladder,

3. Bedwetting and toileting problems in children. Patrina H Y Caldwell, Elisabeth Hodson, Jonathan C Craig and Denise Edgar. Med J Aust 2005; 182 (4): 190-195

Preventing constipation

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1. The economic impact of incontinence in Australia, 2011, Deloitte Access Economics 2. Constipation and toileting issues in children. Anthony G Catto-Smith. Med J Aust 2005; 182 (5): 242-246

Save time and money with online workshops Our ONLINE workshops are subsidised under the Inclusion and Professional Support Program in a number of States and Territories - check with your Professional Support Coordinator or visit our website www.owfc.com.au. Click on your state to see the latest workshops.

One World for Children is an industry based Registered Training Organisation (RTO) specialising in the delivery of competency based training programs to the children’s services industry. We have developed a range of professional development training sessions for the childcare sector using a new and innovative approach, which will enable your service, regardless of your geographic location, access to quality professional in-servicing that is appropriate to your needs. To participate in this new and innovative approach to ongoing professional development, all you need is a computer with speakers, internet access and a microphone. What we provide is a platform that uses the latest VoIP programming combined with an interactive electronic white board, chat areas, powerpoint presentations, video clips, slide shows, web tours and two-way voice making online learning visually stimulating, interactive and fun! Our virtual classroom enables 20 participants to partake in relevant, current workshop sessions whilst actively engaging and interacting with a professional qualified trainer, and networking with each other. The appeal of fact-to-face interaction is now captured in our virtual classroom, however the associated costs have been substantially lowered. Each session is available on various days from 7.30pm AEST on an ongoing basis, putting you in the position to allow everyone of your staff the opportunity to participate in a session that addresses an identified need with your service or an area that you would like to enhance your knowledge and skills.

Highlights from our calendar... Infants, Toddlers and the EYLF

“I was impressed, very impressed. Also excited. I kept thinking who I would like to tell about it and how may I use it in my own centre. This is going to be an invaluable tool. It will make training, up skilling and interaction readily accessible to all. Congratulations One World for taking this step...” ~ Pauline Burgwin, Director, Wattletree Early Childhood Centre.

Infants and toddlers deserve a world that is strongly influenced by the adults who surround them. The relationships that educators have with infants and toddlers will affect the quality of development, education and care. Explore how you can ensure that the vision and principles of the EYLF enhance your practices with infants and toddlers. Designed for: All educators. All service types Quality Area: 5 EYLF Outcome: 1, 2 & 3

Shared partnerships with families Focusing on a collaborative, shared relationship with families is essential in attaining quality outcomes for children. How many educators are of the opinion that too many families are too busy or seem uninterested in their child’s day? If we as professionals work collaboratively with families to meet their individual communication needs, together with some help from this session in discovering creative communication ideas, you can start implementing a shared relationship with families today! Designed for: All educators. All service types Quality Area: 4 EYLF Outcome: 1

Using intentional teaching to scaffold and extend each child’s learning Intentional teaching is deliberate, purposeful and thoughtful! It cannot be confused with a theme based programming approach. Intentionality utilizes professional knowledge and strategies that reflect contemporary theories and research concerning children’s play, leisure and learning. Learn how to make use of spontaneous teachable moments which extend children’s learning! Learn how to comment on children’s displays of learning dispositions, by providing encouragement and additional ideas and support to children!

Our online “Active Supervision” workshop has proven to be very popular.

Designed for: All educators. All service types Quality area: 1 EYLF Outcome: 4

1800 006 533 training@owfc.com.au www.owfc.com.au 39 Australian Family Magazine

familysafety

Battery

Have you ever dropped the remote control? It breaks into pieces, casing components and battery parts flying. To a child, the small shiny object that is the ubiquitous button battery is an attractive object just asking to be tested out in their mouth. And these batteries are everywhere; the number of common household items powered by the button/lithium battery has exploded in the past decade. Button batteries can be found in calculators, remote controls, car keys, toys and games, clocks, flameless candles, Christmas decorations, digital books and novelty greeting cards, portable smoke detectors – the list is ever increasing. In fact, most digital gadgets now include these kinds of batteries. However it is the small button-sized lithium battery that has made the news for the most tragic of reasons, with the death in July 2013 of a young child in Queensland. According to Hazard, the quarterly e-publication issued by the Victorian Injury Surveillance Unit (VISU), 323 button battery ingestions or insertions by children occurred over a 12 year period (July ‘99-June ‘11) , with 11 % admitted to hospital, and a significant increase since 2005. One-third were children under the age of two. The breakdown of the VISU numbers reveal that the most frequent origin of the battery in question (19%) was described as from a “watch”, followed by toys (7%), games and calculators (5%). Children also managed to insert the batteries up their noses, or in their ears; with the vast majority, nearly three quarters, by swallowing.

The issues Battery size The diameter of button batteries (typically between 5 and 20mm), means that the majority, those 20mm or greater in diameter, correspond with the size of a child’s gullet, particularly just above the windpipe, and will lodge there if swallowed.

Battery power The saliva in the gullet triggers an electrical current from the battery, leading to a chemical reaction which can rapidly damage and burn the oesophagus within two hours. Alkaline leakage may also occur, as well damage to soft

Australian Family Magazine

tissue cause by mechanical pressure of the lodged battery. Even if the battery is “flat”, enough current passes through to cause injury. Research from the United States has revealed that lightweight lithium batteries with a voltage greater that 3 volts cause the greatest harm. They are twice the voltage of other button batteries; generating more current, with potentially very serious outcomes.

First aid After swallowing a battery, a child may still be able to breathe, but might start to drool, cough and gag – in other words as if they have something stuck in their throat. As the most common at risk age-group is under two, often they can’t tell you what is wrong. If you suspect that your child has swallowed a battery, do not induce vomiting and get to a hospital emergency department immediately. The severe damage caused by

safety swallowing a battery is significant and children who have done so have required many surgeries to repair the damage to windpipe, vocal chords and gullet.

Err on the side of caution and make it clear to staff that you suspect a battery has been ingested; button batteries are hard to see on x rays unless specifically screened for them. Hazard-http://www.monash.edu.au/miri/research/ research-areas/home-sport-and-leisure-safety/visu/ hazard/haz75.pdf af

Tips  Audit your house. What items do you commonly own that might be powered by button batteries? There will be more that you realise.  Once identified, have a designated place for items such as car keys and remote controls that are out of the reach of children – easier said than done, but it’s a matter of forming good safety habits.  Check for loose case coverings – children’s small hands and curious minds may result in an exploratory investigation gone wrong.  A strong piece of duct tape placed over battery housing covers can provide a visual reminder for parents and an extra layer of safety protection.

familysafety

TV tip-overs With the advent of large flat screen televisions, it’s important than parents be aware of the risks to young children of crush injuries from furniture or appliance tip-overs, caused when large top heavy pieces of furniture or appliances are un-secured. Statistics from the Victorian Injury Surveillance Unit show that between 2006 - 2010, children under 10 accounted for more than 70 percent of visits to hospital emergency departments for accidents caused by tipping televisions. Other household items that pose a risk include: Wall units and book cases, large flat screen TVs, fish tanks, microwaves, birdbaths, free standing pedestal furniture such as standard lamps or coat racks, even Christmas trees can fall over if a child exerts their weight for balance or climbs up.

Check:  A flat screen television can weigh anywhere between 30 kg up to 70 kg. The severe risk to children is not only that of a dead weight falling on them, but also injury caused by sharp edges and shattered glass, and is entirely preventable.  A flat screen TV is safest when wallmounted, with the back of the television secured by brackets to studs in the wall.  If your television is placed on a low-rise base, make sure it has a wide, deep and stable base and that the TV is pushed well back against the wall.  Don’t leave objects such as remote controls on top of an unsecured television.

 Keep spare battery supplies high out of reach of children, and dispose of old batteries safely.

 Test other furniture for stability, especially tall pieces or those located on carpet. Push at the base to see if it is top-heavy, or can be pulled over easily.

 Remind family and friends that the risk is significant – no less so than with any hazardous household material.

 If you must have glass topped items, make sure that the glass is toughened safety glass.

There are a number of battery recycling initiatives for the safe disposal of household batteries (including cylindrical and mobile phone batteries). Visit the Australian Battery Recycling Initiative (ABRI) www.batteryrecycling.org.au

 Keep cords behind furniture out of reach of children.  Never place top heavy items such as televisions on a trolley. More information: www.productsafety.gov.au www.thebatterycontrolled.com

Australian Family Magazine

Kidsread

Baby Bedtime by Mem Fox and Emma Quay, Viking $24.99 Written with intensity by Mem Fox on the premature birth of her grandson, with mother and child drawn as elephants (symbolic of kindness, wisdom and strength) and illustrated in soft crayon and fabric texture patterns by Emma Quay. The whole is an ode to the deliciousness of young babies and the love they bring to a home.

Colour for Curlews by Renée Treml, Random House Australia $19.95 The author is first and foremost an artist and it shows in her story about the colours of Australia native birds. The detailed pen and ink drawings are highlighted by splashes of colour, as each of the birds discover the vibrancy of different hues of yellows, reds, greens and purples.

Baby Elephant Walk, Hal David & Henry Mancini (composers) Rhiannon Mowat (illustrator), Scholastic Australia $24.95 With bonus CD featuring Jay Laga’aia, this is a ‘swingin’ sing-a-long version of the classic tune. Just try and resist the urge to get and dance along with it – complete with actions, of course.

How to wash a woolly mammoth by Michelle Robinson & Kate Hindley, Koala Books, $14.99 One more on the the theme of elephants, but this time the problem of how to make a very woolly mammoth friend clean again. Children will chuckle at

Australian Family Magazine

kidstuff the incongruous humour of trying to wash such a very big animal and its expressions of patience; and recognise the bath rituals they themselves go through. Perfect story to read to a bath-refuser.

My First Animalia by Graeme Base, Viking, $19.95 It’s hard to believe that it”s more than 25 years since Animalia was first published (1986). The children who discovered the weird and wonderful world that lives within the pages are likely to be parents themselves. In this version, Base invites children to discover the world of Animalia by discovery – through a lift-the- flap format with visual clues by two alphabet letters per page. The twist is one image each is a humorous clue that doesn’t belong!

Rainforest Lullaby by Sally Odgers and Lisa Stewart, Scholastic Australia $24.99 A lullaby with a difference – with a story line in rhyme. Illustrated in the soft gray-greens of the Australian rainforest landscape, children will hear about how each of the forest animal and bird life settle for sleep - by day or by night.

I spy pets... by Edward Gibbs, Koala Books, $13.99 Some of the pets in the story are unusual to say the least, but that’s the fun of this narrative. Written in the classic format, each page has a clue and a peephole to the image on the next page, so that children can predict the right answer. To complete the fun, the story ends with a peephole in the back cover so that children can “spy” on the world with their own “little eye”.

An Aussie Year - twelve months in the life of Australian kids, by Tania McCartney and Tina Snerling, Exisle Publishing $19.99 Visually detailed, interesting to look at, read and discuss what else might have been included! Ned, Zoe, Lily, Kirra and Matilda are children who come from the diverse backgrounds that is our country and lead young readers through the events, special days, celebrations and highlights of each month of the year. Wonderful resource for using in the early years or in school classrooms.

Amazing babes – a picture book for kids and adults by Eliza Sarlos, illustrated by Grace Lee, Scribe $24.95 We absolutely loved this picture book – it is the antidote to the onslaught of sexualised images of female “celebrity” that young girls are subjected to every day. Each page presents a woman of achievement from around the world past and present, with the defining quality by which we know them; whether that be the compassion of Mum Shirl, the rule breaking of Elizabeth Garrett Anderson or the fearlessness of Malala Yousafzai.

mumstuff The modern family Survival guide by Nigel Latta, Doubleday $34.95 The subhead for this read “a handbook for step-parents, single parents, grandparents raising grandchildren and everyone in between”

Kidsread

An interview with

Mem Fox Mem Fox is a little peeved and would like to set the record straight. She is NOT against tablet technology!

In fact, as she has said in the past about television and DVDs, technology has its place in helping children develop powers of concentration, oral competency, imagination and storytelling skills. And Mums don’t beat yourselves up – screens are okay, especially if they buy peace and quiet while dinner is prepared! What she does want parents to bear in mind is that technology does not, and should never replace parents when it comes to the loving interaction that only reading a picture book together can bring. It doesn’t quite sound the same to suggest cuddling up to read the ipad! Picture book illustrations and text are different on screen; something is lost in the translation from paper. And lest anyone should think, well Mem Fox would say that, after all, she’s in the business of selling books; Fox’s response is that she’s a writer and a storyteller – that’s her mission in life and so far print picture books just work better! The bottom line is, don’t abandon your child to a screen, engage in the technology with them. Whilst on the topic of screen domination, Fox recoiled in horror on hearing an anecdote about a mother handing over her iphone to her toddler at the beginning of a supermarket shop. Was the child crying? she enquired. Well no, quite peaceful and happy. Oh, what a lost opportunity for conversation and with it early literacy.

“What can you see there?” “What shall we have for dinner? “Look at the shiny red apples...” Because as she knows, through her earlier teaching career (as Associate Professor, Literacy Studies in the School of Education at Flinders University in SA), competency in oral language is a positive predictor of success in acquiring reading literacy. If we adults make it our business to engage in conversation about the words and symbols in the world around us, and actively read to our children every night, they will enter the formal school system with a massive advantage. By association of ideas, that brings her to discuss the “league tables” of school readers. Fox thinks they’re mostly boring and dull, set a child up for poor self esteem and is it any wonder children are turned off reading?! So, please, she begs parents and teachers, let children choose books to read for pleasure, not because they have to! On that topic she is clear that Possum Magic (while her best known publication) is not in fact the best book to read to very young children. For them she loves a bouncy, repetitive rhythmic

style and nominates Owl Babies by Martin Waddell, and Monkey and Me by Emily Gravett as perfect page turners – the stories are short, fast paced and engaging. Of her own vast canon of work (42 and rising!), for the very young she recommends Where is the Green Sheep? and Yoo Hoo Ladybird! Mem Fox is now a grandmother and her latest picture book, Baby Bedtime, written at the time of the premature birth of her grandson, has to be the best gift of all – a story just for him! As a grandmother, she has also given herself permission to slow her pace down to that of her grandchild when they are together and “live in the present”. Too often, and she has been there, through necessity or need, parents can become preoccupied with “rushing towards the future”. In fastpaced modern family life, talk can become little more than the Q & A demands of getting out the door, more or less in one piece. And that’s where Grandmas, Nonnas, Babcias, Pops, Pas and a “Nanou” stand, ready, willing and able, with picture book in hand! af Australian Family Magazine

Australian Family Magazine

Back to the future play The playing adult steps sideward into another reality; the playing child advances forward to new stages of mastery. ~Erik H. Erikson (psychologist) Professor Edith Ackerman knows a thing or two about children’s play. As inhouse developmental psychologist for Lego for 23 years, and author of The Whole Child Development Guide, she works extensively with Lego designers and has a unique insight into the world of children’s play. In particular, she has focussed on the ability of children to self direct their own play. Lego Duplo is an open-ended toy designed to allow children to develop creativity, imagination and story-telling at their own pace, as well as develop their fine and gross motor skills. Lego Duplo systems offer endless possibilities and can grow as a child grows in capabilities. Building block systems such as Lego Duplo also possess their own logic – a child learns how to manipulate the blocks to achieve their play purpose. This builds problems solving skills and adaptability. Children can create a whole imaginary world to play with when they add in the various characters and that world is a three-dimensional one which can take place on several planes as children build increasingly complex structures. A survey recently commissioned by LEGO Australia with over 1000 mothers provides insights into the world of playtime in Australia.

So where do mothers look for ideas and advice about their children’s play time? Not surprisingly, their own parents, friends, mothers’ groups and the internet are the first point of contact. Nostalgia also plays its part, with mothers keen to provide their children with the classic toys of their own childhood. This is particularly so as digital toys form an increasing part of a birthday wish list.

The survey revealed that approximately 60% of preschoolers are exposed to an hour or more of screen time (television, computers, games consoles or tablets). Despite all mothers who took part in the survey recognising the importance of playtime in their child’s development, a quarter admitted they are unsure about the best way to play with their young ones. More than half (57%) of the mums concerned about their child’s development feel they could

❒ Pre-school children aged between one to five years old spend 5 hours 20 minutes playing each day. ❒ Across the nation, 23.9 million toys are bought each year for pre-school children. ❒ Playing with open ended building blocks develops the skills of classifying, ordering, comparing and making patterns - an important part of understanding the world children live in.

do more to aid this progression, with two in five specifically focussed on the development of their child’s social skills. Commenting on the study findings, consumer research expert, Neer Korn said: “In my research with parents, a topic regularly referenced is the fact that there is so much conflicting advice about what they should and shouldn’t be doing when it comes to playtime. “Playtime with pre-schoolers can therefore feel overwhelming, as the survey highlights. They cannot help but constantly compare their own child’s development to that of their peers and want to know their child is on par, and certainly not falling behind other children. Mothers can see and appreciate the benefits of LEGO DUPLO for their child’s general development: its ability to encourage creative thinking and problem solving and that it develops a child’s understanding of different shapes, sizes and colours.

INFORMATION SUPPLIED BY LEGO AUSTRALIA, as well as sourced at WWW.LEGO.COM

❒B uilding blocks also encourage mathematical skills and vocabulary. ❒L EGO DUPLO bricks are called DUPLO because they are double the size of ordinary Lego bricks. ❒ D uplo is 100% compatible with Lego blocks and designed for the smaller hands and developing manual dexterity of children aged 18 months and up. The LEGO DUPLO Play Index Survey was conducted in September 2013 with 1000 Australian mothers.

Australian Family Magazine

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Get into the spirit of adventure with Play School In the Wild. We explore wild places and spaces, discover wild animals and rare plants and play with the wild possibilities of imaginary worlds. Come and join us as we have a wild time singing wild songs, dancing to wild rhythms, painting wild paintings and dressing up in wild clothes! Featuring: Teo Gebert, Andrew McFarlane, Zindzi Okenyo, Emma Palmer and Leah Vandenberg. Other Playschool titles included are Shake, Rattle and Roll; and Putting On A Show. Prize pack: In the Wild; Shake Rattle & Roll; Putting On A Show. Total value SRP $59.85

Australian Family Magazine

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Go to our website, in our survey and in 25 words oThErfill iNformATioN or less, explain which article in the Summer 2014 edition gave you the best advice for your family life. Entries close 11.59 pm Wednesday, 30th April, 2014.

Australian Family Magazine

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Australian Family Magazine

But wait – this great idea is not limited to your pool or spa pump. Imagine a sunset, or a lavender field, or a vineyard scene on the walls surrounding your spa. It could be as simple as wanting the appearance of stone, glass bricks, timber or mosaics, but not the hassle or the expense of the real thing. The solution is to PRINT IT! Picture that blank wall in your alfresco area being transformed into a cobblestone laneway in Italy or France, so real that you almost believe you could step into it! You can even reproduce a favourite holiday destination by using your own images for all to see and appreciate. We can do that!* For more information and image galleries, as well as the full range of products available, visit www. urbanfurbish.com.au and follow us on Facebook, Pinterest and Twitter. *Conditions apply and material offered for reproduction will need to be assessed for suitability, resolution etc

thickeners, preservatives or anti-caking agents typically found in other powdered pre-mixes. There are two delicious varieties – Vanilla Honey and Club Cinnamon. Bondi Chai Latte is also gluten free, 98% fat free, low in caffeine and contains no trans-fats. A 200ml Bondi Chai contains only 500kJ (120cal)! Available in the tea and coffee aisle of both Coles and Woolworths. www.bondichai.com.au

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Australian Family Magazine

Dad’sview

The coach

By John Weldon

So I’ve had my first game as coach of the ‘Kick Chix’ under 12’s all-girl futsal team, of which my daughter is a member, and I’m quietly buzzing. Clearly my efforts as team manager of the Yarraville Glory Under 9s, where my eldest son plays, didn’t go unnoticed by those in the coaching know. Yes, you may call me Alex Ferguson. I took on the job of coach reluctantly as I had done with refereeing and team managing for my son’s team and as I’ll be doing as a junior-committee member at his club next year. Reluctantly, because as a parent who works full-time and who also takes son number two to karate lessons, time is not on my side. But then they look at you with those big puppy dog eyes and they say, ‘please daddy’ and … well you know the rest.

I walked away from that game once again marveling at how much more exciting it is to watch my kids play sport than it is to watch professionals. I’m so much more invested, but in a way that’s different from the way I used to be when I went to watch the Doggies play every week. I want my kids to succeed. And by that I mean I want them to get what they want from the game. If that’s just a good time then that’s fine, but if they’re striving for more, then I want that for them too. I ride every bump and tackle with them and I suspect I sometimes enjoy the highs and suffer the lows even more than they do.

And reluctantly soon becomes enthusiastically anyway. How could it not? Even if coaching at the futsal level is more akin to interchange manager than anything else, who wouldn’t want to be involved with a group of energetic kids one or more of which are their own? It’s great fun. I ended up spending way too much time at the futsal centre that first evening, watching my son play for ‘La Roja’ against ‘The Reds’ (score 3-3 thanks for asking) then meeting and coaching my team, literally, for the first time. The Kick Chix training session began with the girls squealing and bouncing up and down in group hugs, which was something new to me – the under 9 boys weren’t so much into that. But they soon focused. These girls play very good, disciplined netball together, and so they understand the need to work hard, which they did. Their enthusiasm and energy was infectious, I became infected, we had a great game and we drew 2-2 with a team of, albeit younger, boys.

Australian Family Magazine

And the game is much more honest at that level – it’s sport played for its own sake. There’s no agenda and there’s nothing really to be gained or lost other than pride. Sure you come across the odd team, coach or parent who wants to make it more than that, but thankfully they’re rare. But there is a downside. Even though you protest loudly that you have no spare time, if you’re not careful, you’ll soon find yourself volunteering to mark out the pitch, arrange the oranges roster, and organize the money for the team photos (is there a more thankless job?). Then you’ll start

going to meetings where you sit with other time-poor parents, all wearing slightly dazed looks on their faces that read: ‘why am I in the club rooms at 8.30 on a Wednesday evening talking about the price of goal posts?’ At this point it’s still possible for the strong willed to walk away while those who are unable to, the weak and the meek, inherit, not the Earth, but the spare keys to the equipment shed thereby putting themselves at the beck and call of every ning-snong who forgot to sort out bibs, corner flags or balls before the game. If that happens then you’re gone. You’ll soon start turning up to training in shorts and runners, even if you’re not coaching. You’ll start wearing white sports socks pulled up to mid shin. Next you’re sporting the club polo shirt and windbreaker about the house, and pretty soon those Wednesday evening meetings start to make sense. You begin to see the need for more discussion re the windcheater vs. full tracksuit debate for the junior boys. You start eyeing off the cool hoodies your daughter’s netball team wear with ‘Kingsville Fireworks’ emblazoned across the back in gold embroidered letters and you wonder if they have larger sizes (they do but my daughter won’t let me have one). From there it’s only a heart beat until you’re organising the dinner dance, you’re offered the position of club president, which I’d gladly accept, if the meetings didn’t clash with my youngest son’s karate classes so, you’ll have to find someone else…this year. Help me someone.

f a e s e z e e Sn nter with n wi s

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The fund for everyone Catholic Super â&#x20AC;&#x201C; providing superannuation services to members and employers for more than 40 years. Industry super fund returning all profits to members Superior investment performance Competitive fees Flexible investment options Superannuation and pension products Low cost and flexible insurance

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Brisbane

Financial planning advice

1300 655 002 | www.csf.com.au

Authorised by CSF Pty Limited (ABN 30 006 169 286; AFSL 246664), the Trustee of the Catholic Superannuation Fund (ABN 50 237 896 957). This information is about the Fund and is general information only. It has been prepared without taking into account your personal investment Australian Family objectives, financial situation or needs.Magazine It is not intended to be, and should not be construed in any way as, investment, legal or financial advice.

CS288 May2013