Issue 3 - November, 2020 by Edina Zephyrus

www.edinazephyrus.com

November 24, 2020| 41:3

COMMENTARY

Tuesday, November 24, 2020

Zephyrus staff 2020-2021 Editorial Board Art Boettge, media coordinator Madeline Brandel, visual editor Sophie Charnell, visual editor Michael Crater, outreach coordinator Mia DiLorenzo, head staff writer Dedeepya Guthikonda, media coordinator Matthew Hovelsrud, online editor Sadie Johnson Sieben, manager Ellen Mi, editor-in-chief Reagan Stanchfield, copy editor Alexis Yi, print editor Page Editors Liliana Hanson Hanna Jaeger Isadora Li Caroline Seiler Linnea Shively Izzy Wagener Advisor Daniel Amborn

Staff Writers Althea Barrows Nora Franssen Maren Fullerton Eleanor Hutcheson Sage Jezierski Urva Jha Hannah Owens Pierre Pavithra Sankar Reilly Shane Celia Vedder Photographers Rhea Hammond Hayden Kleynhas Lilian Simmons Artists Anabelle Jakala Elizabeth Lundberg Lydio Olson Nora Riter Laryn Scribner Ellanor Splinter

On the inside... Find your next quarantine read pages 6 & 7

Q&A with Edina City Councillor James Pierce page 3

Letters to the Editor To share an opinon or voice a conern over issues in Edina or an article Zephyrus has published, submit a letter to the editor online by clicking ‘Contact Us’ and then clicking ‘Send Us A Letter.’

Policies Zephyrus is a monthly publication produced by students of Edina High School; 6754 Valley View Road; Edina, MN 55439; (952) 848-3800 x3087. Zephyrus is a designated forum for student expression that recognizes the First Amendment guarantee of freedom of the press, and abides by Tinker standard. Opinions published in Zephyrus do not necessarily reﬂect the views of the entire staff, adviser, administration, or entire student body. Submissions and letters are printed based on space available. Letters should be mailed to the school or given to the adviser or a staff member.

Humor: an alien observes Google Meets in the pandemic page 9

On the cover Art by Anabelle Jakala

Find Zephyrus online @edinazephyrus

WEB PREVIEW Female-identifying students respond to Kamala Harris’s win

For more, visit edinazephyrus.com

NEWS

Tuesday, November 24, 2020

Mia Dilorenzo head staff writer Zephyrus: What initially led you to run for this position? Was there a specific moment that was a deciding factor? James Pierce: I co-led the Race and Equity Task Force for Edina. In that process, we recommend 2021 [equity] recommendations; I presented those to the City Council, they get approved, and I was ready to then roll up our sleeves and execute. I told [Mayor Jim Hovland] that I felt uncomfortable to have recommendations that were that extensive and hand them over to someone else. It was actually that moment that I started wondering “was there some other way that I can get more involved?” This year, when the City Council role became open, I talked to my wife and family and I thought this might be interesting [because] you have a lot more inﬂuence on what actually gets done. Z: You just won the race outright — how do you think that your campaign stood out from the rest and was able to get the majority of Edina’s votes? JP: When you talk to people who are running [for office] and you ask them why they’re running, a lot of times people will

give you issues. For me, I always talk about leadership — I look at [these issues] as symptoms that warrant us needing more leadership or a different kind of leadership. They’re so complicated then you have to [include] people that can bring more people to the table and I kind of think of it as building change coalitions. I also wasn’t afraid to talk to anyone. My dad used to always say “Always take the high road because eventually, everybody’s got to meet you there.” I try to remember that and make sure to connect with everybody. Z: In the wake of the 2016 election and now moving past the 2020 election, Edina has remained politically divided. How do you hope to remedy this division and unify the city through your work on the council? JP: There were issues on our campaign where it was pretty clear that we were pretty polarized. One of the things that I really hope to do is that I like to try and help more people understand how a particular issue that they think doesn’t impact them, actually does. I do that by sharing stories and asking questions — just connecting with people. I hope that I can be an impetus to do that by sitting down with different people and listening to their perspectives without an agenda. It may take a while, but I do think people respect that and it causes them to engage in a different way.

photo courtesy of James Pierce

City Councillor James Pierce reflects on his campaign and future policies

A different kind of leadership: James Pierce enters office with optimism

Target turns black friday into a month long sale

art by Betsy Lundberg

Linnea Shively page editor

n order to avoid large crowds and packed stores during the COVID-19 pandemic, Target has chosen to extend Black Friday deals through the entire month of November—as well as staying closed on Thanksgiving for the first time since 2011. Along with spaced-out deals, Target is implementing new contactless ways to order and pick up purchases. In order to provide greater ﬂexibility for customers, Target’s “Black Friday Now” program will offer week-long deals on different areas of goods. The specific deals will be posted on Target’s weekly digital ad the Thursday prior to the sale beginning on Sunday. For the week of November 22-28, toys, kitchen items, cleaning supplies, and electronics will be on sale.

Senior Katy Meffert has worked at Target for almost a year as a Guest Checkout Advocate. “It always gets busy around the holidays,” Meffert said. However, she also noted that people have been less aggressive as Target gradually lifts purchase limits on some items. Additionally, Target has implemented additional safety measures to increase the use of contactless checkout. In the Target mobile app, the Wallet feature has been upgraded in order to bypass scanning and pay with the app. Target has also added an extra 8,000 curbside pickup sites nationwide to decrease store traffic. For employees, “We take precautions…we’re in a cubicle [of plexiglass] at checkout” Meffert said. As holiday shopping ramps up, there are plenty of options for shopping—whether in-store, online, or curbside pickup—to fit comfort level, budget, and help shoppers finish their lists early.

Transition begins, yet Trump still has not conceded

Alexis Yi online editor

ince the 2020 presidential election was called for former Vice President Joe Biden on Nov. 7, President Donald Trump has denied and challenged the results in several tangible ways. Besides exacerbating existing tensions in the country, the administration’s refusal to acknowledge the election outcome could be harmful to the US on matters from national security to the pandemic. While the Trump campaign spreads allegations of voter fraud on the internet, the current administration has also snubbed the incoming Biden team on several fronts. According to Politico, the current administration has gone forth with drafting next year’s budget plan, which could only be released after Biden’s Jan. 20 inauguration. In addition, Trump only recently decided to let a formal transition begin on Nov. 23, three weeks after the election. Such a delay could have massive implications for national security: some scholars and

officials have suggested that the delay after the 2000 election contributed to the US being caught unprepared by the 9/11 attacks, according to NPR and CNBC. This delay has pushed Biden to create his own briefing teams of former government officials, according to both Reuters and the New York Times. Meanwhile, the Trump team filed lawsuits challenging the vote count in several key swing states, including Pennsylvania, Michigan, and Arizona. The lawsuits have been mostly unsuccessful. NPR reports that Trump’s claims of voter fraud or illegal ballots were rejected in courts in both Michigan and Pennsylvania; in Arizona, Trump’s own legal team admitted that the number of votes being contested wouldn’t affect the state’s outcome. Another of Trump’s suits in Pennsylvania was dropped by the legal team the campaign had hired, according to the New York Times. Notably, the Michigan vote count was certified on Nov. 23, a sharp rebuke of Trump’s effort to contest the results. Both the Trump and Biden administrations have called for more funding from supporters as Trump

continues to challenge the count. According to NPR, donations to Biden will go to the Democratic National Committee and then to the Biden Fight Fund for legal defense of the election results. Donations to Trump, meanwhile, will primarily go towards the campaign’s debt and to Trump’s new leadership political action committee, Save America, which is meant to allow Trump to continue to inﬂuence the Republican party; for each donation, only the money remaining after $5000 will go towards Trump’s legal expenses. There has been significant pushback against Trump’s claims outside of court. Election officials throughout the country have issued a statement that the 2020 election “was the most secure in American history,” according to the New York Times. While the majority of the Republican party continues to support Trump, the number of Republicans breaking from Trump is slowly growing, according to the Associated Press and the New York Times. As the pandemic rages on in the US, the Trump administration’s election challenge strains an already fraught political climate.

art by Nora Riter

FEATURES

Tuesday, November 24, 2020

A district driver with Dr. Houck: Edina’s new literacy specialist a big heart Pavi Sankar staff writer

Be kind: Barb Aslesen imparts a powerful message on students

Sage Jezierski staff writer

arly in September, Edina Public Schools announced the hiring of Dr. Bonnie Houck as Edina’s first literacy specialist. Many responsibilities come with this role, from working with the school board and EPS learning specialists to structuring Edina’s literacy development plans. Dr. Houck began as a third grade teacher and soon realized that many of her students were unable to read at grade level. “I felt an obligation because I have a passion. It bothers me when somebody can’t read. There’s things about reading that go beyond the joy and the love,” Dr. Houck said. She soon returned to school to get her Masters Degree in literacy. She continued her teaching career at several schools in both elementary and secondary levels and was offered the opportunity to be the reading specialist for the Minnesota Department of Education. Houck also served as the director of the McKnight Foundation and the reading coordinator at the University of Minnesota. She created the Literacy Academy, which trains educators, and has published two books and multiple articles in academic journals. Her roles at Edina include developing a literacy plan for preschool through 12th grade. To do this, she analyzes Edina’s curriculum and finds areas to improve on. “We have some achievement gap areas to address, so we want to do some studying as

to what we could be doing differently to be meeting the needs of students,” Dr. Houck said. In order to improve Edina’s education, she partners with teams of educators, the school board, and parents, and is in charge of accessing the funding for math and reading intervention. Dr. Houck and her team are currently helping teachers adjust their curriculum to virtual learning. Dr. Houck’s passion is fueled by her love of reading and the obligation she feels to her students. She didn’t plan to come to Edina, but when the opportunity was presented, she accepted. “My life has been a series of not looking for something, but becoming aware of something that was the next step.”

photo courtesy of Bonnie Houck

photo courtesy of Barb Aslesen

hile safe transportation for children to and from school is essential in today’s world, it’s easy to forget how the simple actions of a school bus driver impacts the community. Bus drivers are the ones who give the first “hello” in the morning and wait those extra minutes for a late student. Barb Aslesen has been a district bus driver for 13 years, building personal bonds with her students at Concord, Our Lady of Grace, Normandale, and South View Middle School. Before pursuing her job as a bus driver, Aslesen was the director of sales of two downtown Minneapolis hotels. During that time, Aslesen would teach on Wednesday nights at her church. In her class, a student suggested how she would make a great bus driver. “I started thinking about it. And my kids were all getting to the age where they would be in school, so I thought I’d check it out and see what this is like. I went and I talked to them, and the rest is history,” Aslesen said. In their short moments on the bus, Aslesen has learned to create long-lasting relationships among her students, equipping them with valuable life lessons. “Every day, they get off the bus, I would say, ‘You guys be kind. Be kind,’” Aslesen said. “If you

see someone, even the little kindergarteners on your bus, take care of them.” Although driving a school bus is a daunting task, she manages to create a fun environment for her students by sharing stories and jokes with them. “To me, it’s more than a job. It’s very personal because of the kids. They make it personal,” Aslessen said. “I want them to know how much I care about them because I really, really do.”

A passion for reading: Bonnie Houck takes on the role of literacy specialist

What’s left of the left? Isadora Li page editor

art courtesy of Vivien Whenham

he recent increase in political activity following the murder of George Floyd and the election of president-elect Joe Biden has presented teenagers with a new wave of information via social media networks and news outlets. With narratives further complicated by the United States’ polarized party system, it is oftentimes difficult to distinguish fact from opinion. Senior Meaghan Kiely and junior Viv Wenham break down the nuances of modern day political systems by hosting a podcast “What’s Left of the Left” (WLOTL) that deconstructs primarily leftist political theory. The podcast has an abundance of discussion ideas, drawing inspiration from current political events, such as the nomination of Amy Coney Barret to the Supreme Court, and political theory, such as Marxism. Kiely and Wenham invite guests for the purpose of presenting various viewpoints on topics: most recently featuring junior Will Clausman and senior Jared Holt to elaborate on Marxist theory. “With the episode with Will and Jared, it was probably our most informational episode that we have… [It incorporated] that aspect of combining the knowledge that all four of us all had together in that one episode,” Wenham said. In spite of logistical challenges when getting started, Wenham and Kiely have big plans for the future of the podcast. After recently adding co-hosts junior Arya Mirza and senior Shreya Konkimalla, the four are focused on recording episodes before Kiely and Konkimalla head off to college. “We want to expand our reach and spread our ideas to more people. Eventually when [we all] leave, we could keep this going for a while and have our own sections of it and do it whenever we want to, whenever we need to, and just try to have as many people listen to it as they can,” Wenham said. Ultimately, the podcast provides information to students in a way that aims to expand their current understanding of politics. “I hope a lot of people that watch certain episodes don’t know what we’re talking about at first, so I hope that

people are using it for informational purposes and also just listening to other people talking about politics and hearing their perspective if they have a differing opinion,” Kiely said. Students can listen to WLOTL on Spotify and Apple Podcasts.

Scan this QR Code to listen to the first episode of “What’s Left of the Left” infographic by Dedeepya Guthikonda

ACTIVITIES

Tuesday, November 24, 2020

Young Life gets a new life

Celia Vedder staff writer

art courtesy of Young Life

oung Life, a youth religious organization, has provided many Edina High School students with a sense of community. However, due to the pandemic, the organization isn’t allowed to meet in their typical large group gatherings and have had to make some alterations to their meeting style. Throughout the pandemic, Young Life has made masks mandatory and adapted their meetings to accommodate state guidelines. For the large group meetings, they are able to meet outside in person, as long as the weather is permitting. “Small groups have been able to meet in person outside and socially distant in people’s homes. However, we have occasionally resorted to Zoom, but the leaders ensure the meeting will still be engaging anyway,” sophomore Katie Collier said.

In order to keep up with the new meeting style, leaders have had to adapt how they go about their activities. A typical Young Life meeting includes listening to music, doing a group activity, and religious reflection. “COVID hasn’t changed the activities that we do that much, but it just doesn’t allow us to play community building games. We also usually listen to music and get together and sway along with the music, but unfortunately we are unable to do that. We replace these with individual moments to reflect on ourselves and our relationships with God,” junior Murphy Shively said. Both Collier and Shively described how they were going to miss being able to get together with friends in either the camp or church activity environment. Nevertheless they can’t wait to interact with their groups in a new setting and build a community that Shively said can survive anything.

Mosaic works to create a unified community in a difficult year

Maren Fullerton staff writer

osaic is an activity that has worked hard to create an outstanding community of educational equality at Edina High School. With the pandemic making accessibility more difficult than ever, it has been especially important to Mosaic to reach individual students and encourage inclusivity. The challenge of bringing attention to racial oppression became especially pressing following the murder of George Floyd by Derek Chauvin. Though COVID-19 restrictions have interfered with Mosaic original plans to host student forums and community storytelling, they are still working digitally to make these events possible. “We will be holding a virtual Student Sparkathon on educational equity and are

also collaborating with the Edina Arts and Culture Commission on a virtual gallery for community artistic expression related to the killing of George Floyd and the pandemic,” senior and cabinet member Yash Mangalick said. They work closely with the district and prominent community groups to bring grassroots ideas to the public eye. These ideas stem from their many storytelling events where community members are encouraged to share stories in which Edina’s social disparities are visible. “Mosaic has held several community discussions at Edina elementary schools, hosted Story Night several times, and facilitated student forums at EHS for administration needs,” Mangalick said. Mosaic is enjoyed by the students as it connects them to an extended community. “I believe that mosaic is important to Edina because like any other community, there is a lot of

disagreement and inequality that needs to be talked about and brought to attention, especially in a predominantly white suburb,” senior member of Mosaic Abby Gardner said. Mosaic has created a space for students to explore and share their experiences through story nights and other community events. “I have created many new friendships and have been pushed out of my own comfort zone, which has broadened my perspective of the world and allows me to be a better person and friend to all,” Gardner said. For the future, Mosaic hopes to bridge various divides in the student body and celebrate diversity. This is especially difficult as a group of students from a wealthy suburb in an intense moment in history. Their upcoming events, which involve collaboration with the district and other community groups, aim to serve these goals.

art courtesy of Edina Public Schools

Images showcases the artistic talent of EHS Hannah Owens Pierre staff writer

art courtesy of Images

5 years ago, a group of impassioned Edina High School students founded Images on the Wind, EHS’s own literary and arts magazine. Today, English teacher Kari Discher carries on the legacy as she takes on her fifth year of advising Images, seeking a way for artistic students to express themselves. “I decided to get involved with Images because I am really interested in art and wanted to help students create collections of work by our highly talented EHS artists,” Discher said. Meeting virtually after school on Mondays, staff members aim to accomplish an ambitious goal: creating an annually published book that highlights the art and writing of EHS students and staff. The process is a long one, beginning with collecting work to critique. Images accepts submissions by students and staff in a wide variety of categories, from paintings, sculptures, and ceramics, to poetry and prose. Once art has been sent in for review, the staff critiques it. New members are not required to have any experience in this step of the process; rather, all that is needed to join the club is a common passion for the arts. Sophomore Evelyn Yang joined Images this year to learn about creative expression and meet other stu-

dents who shared her hobby. “I like art because it gives people an opportunity to share a message or thought, sometimes even just their creativity to the world. For me personally, I gained an interest in photography, and it is something that I really enjoy in my free time,” Yang said. “I am hoping to learn to be able to critique art well and in an unbiased way.” Every step in the process, from discussing and selecting art to designing the layout of the book, requires collaboration. “I want our meetings to have a strong emphasis on building community and student voice. It’s a very student-centered publication, and the staff has to be able to work together,” Discher said. Though COVID-19 has posed new challenges for every activity, Images has been quick to adjust. “It’s much more ideal to meet in person, of course, but my staff has been willing to adapt in order to make sure we can hold meetings and eventually publish this year.” At the end of the year, the club compiles the selected art of EHS into a full book for all to purchase. Presale for the book begins in April, but to be put on an email alert list anyone can email kari.discher@ edinaschools.org. Students with a creative passion who would like to share their talent with the world and boast a publication along the way should consider sending art to imagesehs@gmail.com.

STUDENT LIFE

Tuesday, November 24, 2020

Gifting while gifting: A small business guide to holiday shopping art by Anabelle Jakala

Sadie Johnson Sieben manager

ifts are one of the biggest priorities for most people during the holiday season, but this year you can support others while buying your gifts. While most people buy gifts from major corporations such as Target and Amazon, small businesses provide quality, unique items that can give more meaning than a PlayStation 5 gaming system. If you’re looking for decor and other trinkets,

Hunt and Gather is one of the best places to go. The Minneapolis-based business provides antique posters, cake plates, tablecloths, and other novelty items. The store also provides great sales with some giving consumers 20% off the whole store. These gifts would be perfect for the whole family, especially your mom or vintage-obsessed sister. Another small business to explore would be Upstate MN. This store is located in Grand Marais, which is perfect to stop by if you are traveling up North during break. They also have an online shop for those who do not get the chance to go in

person. The shop includes stationery, apothecary goods, household decor, and other accessories. The store is at a higher price range, if you are looking to spend that much, and brings a local Minnesotan aesthetic to their items. If you’re looking to buy gifts from home, an alternative is finding shops on Etsy. Etsy is an online resource for small businesses across the country to list their products on their own online shop. Most shops include customizable gifts perfect for anyone in the family. From wood signs to stickers and pins, you can find almost anything for anyone.

This mashed potato and gravy recipe needs to be on your Thanksgiving table

ashed potatoes and gravy is a beloved side dish that is essential to creating the perfect Thanksgiving feast. Here is a list of directions on how to make this classic Thanksgiving staple for your family! Ingredients: Three lbs potatoes (about four large potatoes) Salt to taste One stick of unsalted butter ½ cup of whole milk ½ cup of sour cream Black pepper to taste Two tablespoons of butter

Two tablespoons of all-purpose ﬂour One cup of chicken or turkey stock Directions: In a large pot, cover potatoes with water and add a pinch of salt. Bring to a boil and cook until soft for 16 to 18 minutes. Drain and return the potatoes to the empty pot. Use a potato masher or forks to mash potatoes until smooth. Meanwhile, in a saucepan, melt the one stick of butter and milk until they are warm. Pour the milk-butter mixture over the mashed potatoes and stir until it's completely incorporated. Add the sour cream and mix everything so that it's evenly combined. Season mashed potatoes with salt and

pepper. Add two tablespoon butter to a saucepan over medium heat. Once heated, whisk in the ﬂour with butter and continue to whisk for five minutes. Add in the stock slowly and allow it to continue to cook over medium heat to thicken for about seven to eight minutes, constantly stirring to avoid sticking! Season gravy with salt and pepper. Pour this delicious gravy over your mashed potatoes and serve!

photo courtesy of Pavi Sankar

Pavi Sankar staff writer

Mashed potato recipe cited from delish Gravy recipe cited from Grandbaby Cakes Eat up!: Thanksgiving dinner is served

Your 2020 Thanksgiving horoscope

Nora Franssen staff writer

ries: Now is the time for you to find that one friend who’s always got a brain-full of bad ideas. If you do decide to go swimming today, make sure to bring a giant inﬂatable duckie. Taurus: There’s a light at the end of the tunnel, but you’re worried that it’s a train. Relax, it’s just someone who can’t find a Wi-Fi signal. Team up with them, because they have a Hulu account and are looking for a roommate. Gemini: Buy a cat and name it Felix. This will get you out of a jam. Make those homemade hand-puppets you’ve been thinking about. If you’re feeling like others aren’t taking you seriously, try dyeing your hair pink! Cancer: Nothing tastes as sweet as winning, especially winning at the expense of others. Try taking some time alone with your thoughts so they won’t feel as scared and lonely. On Tuesday, the universe is your enemy. Watch out for banana peels. Leo: Purchasing an orange pillowcase will ensure your survival in the event of a nuclear war. You have a mighty roar, but you also have an incredibly cute meow. A carrot may try to choke you this week, so watch out! Virgo: It isn’t your job to keep the world spinning; you just need to give it an encouraging slap every now and then. It’ll be fine while you put your feet up for a few days and check out what’s new on Netﬂix.

Libra: You have a bright future as a ferret groomer. Friday could be Hawaiian shirt day at work or school. If not, you should suggest it, and others will be impressed by your enthusiasm! Someone may give you fresh lemons or a purple bow-tie! Scorpio: There’s no substitute for real unbridled laziness. Within the next 29 hours, you will suddenly understand both empathy and physics. Make sure to eat a sandwich. It will play a pivotal role in the outcome of your life. Sagittarius: Quit looking on the bright side so much. The squinting will give you wrinkles. Love is in the air, so buy some air freshener. You will receive a phone call tonight. Wait exactly six rings before answering. Capricorn: Whether you know it or not, you were born with an exceptional talent for playing the congas. Unfortunately for you, that broccoli you ate earlier was really out of date. Remember to read the labels next time. Aquarius: You were visited by aliens last night and because of you, they found our species not worth further investigation. There’s a difference between looking on the bright side and realizing it’s actually just the dark side on fire. Pisces: Now is a great time to tell your mom about that one dish she makes that you absolutely hate. You have lots of advice to give on things that you actually couldn’t care less about. Hide your favorite action figure.

art by Ellanor Splinter

STUDENT LIFE

Tuesday, November 24, 2020

Wonderful winter wears to brighten up your wardrobe Nora Franssen staff writer This chic ensemble consists of a comfortable cream coloured sweater accompanied by a pair of light blue jeans, featuring some versatile black leather boots that are sure to add a stylish edge. The warm beanie included will keep your head warm and will look super cute. This outfit is sure to draw envy from others.

Looking for an outfit for any occasion? Try this sophisticated winter outfit. In a smart white collared shirt, grey pants, and white sneakers, the wearer will look incredibly classy. The tangerine sweater adds a pop of color and an added layer of warmth. It’s an eye-catching ensemble that also looks incredibly stylish.

Wearers can look cool and comfy in this simple but stylish outfit. Paired with the contrast of dark jeans against a white t-shirt, the green jacket ensures the comfort of the wearer by retaining heat. The outfit also includes some sophisticated white tennis shoes that make the black jeans stand out in a cool way. The wearer is art by Ellanor Splinter

Practice street smarts by watching Mulaney’s “Kid Gorgeous” ohn Mulaney, an Emmy award winning comedian, seems to be better fit as a 1950s news host than as a contemporary entertainer. His voice hints at a long-lost transatlantic accent and he almost always performs in form-fitting suits. Indeed, his reputation precedes him; before performing at Radio City Music Hall, Mulaney had risen to notoriety through his earlier stand-up specials “New in Town” and “Comeback Kid.” After attending Georgetown University, Mulaney worked at Comedy Central and performed on several late night talk show shows, catching the attention of Saturday Night Live producer Lorne Michaels. Mulaney wrote for SNL for four years before embarking on his journey as an independent comedian and performer. He quickly rose to comedy stardom; his 2018 special, Kid Gorgeous, sold out Radio City Music Hall for seven consecutive shows—selling over 40,000 total tickets. The comedy special begins with a brief montage of Radio City, featuring Tony award winning actress Carole Shelley in a small cameo role. Mulaney first addresses the audience with a humble quip that alludes to his younger age and subsequent success, joking that he “loves to play venues where if the guy that built the venue could see [Mulaney] on the stage, he’d be a little bit bummed about it.” Most of Mulaney’s jokes are about his past experiences with awkward family interactions, his previous jobs (most notably

his gig as an SNL writer and four-time host), or stories from his childhood. Though this seems like a niche and small set of options, all of his bits are incredibly well-coordinated and his sense of comedic timing is unparalleled. One of the most iconic pieces within this special is his recollection of the elementary school “Street Smarts” program. Mulaney looks back on his school’s stranger danger lecturer, child homicide expert J.J. Bittenbinder, a man who often wore three-piece suits, an impressive handlebar mustache, and cowboy hats. Bittenbinder’s tips include: utilizing a money clip as a decoy for a wallet, punching out a car’s tail light in the event of an abduction, and avoiding secondary locations at all costs. Mulaney described Bittenbinder’s teaching methods as the antithesis of Mary Poppins; rather than a spoonful of sugar, Bittenbinder practiced a philosophy of “brush your teeth. Now boom, orange juice! That’s life.” In all of his specials, Mulaney will bring back smaller jokes and wrap them up towards the end of his routine. Earlier in the special, Mulaney referenced his mother’s vision of the ghost of a Victorian girl in a nightgown who lived in his childhood home. Nearing the end, Mulaney circled back as he described his mother’s affinity for sleep shirts, or XXL shirts from distant relatives, stating that “maybe the Victorian girl was just [Mulaney] all along!” He certainly has an aptitude for comedic writing, ensuring that no loose ends remain when the audience stands to leave the theater (or turn off Netﬂix, in my case). After watching this special, I can’t recommend “Kid Gorgeous” enough. There’s surely a joke in his routine for everyone—

he perfectly encapsulates the very root of the human experience through awkward conversations and his own struggles with growing up. Right now, we all need a bit of a laugh; why not turn on some stand-up? photo courtesy of "Kid Gorgeous"

Mia DiLorenzo head staff writer

Street smarts: John Mulaney performs "Kid Gorgeous" at Radio City

An extraterrestrial perspective on Google Meets artian Intelligence Agency - Earthen Observational Report 130750839s3

Earth is currently experiencing a plague, known in Earthen vernacular as ‘coronavirus.’ While wearing a ‘mask’ is a simple way to prevent contracting the virus , many humans refuse to do so. Their rationale is unknown. However, the instructional facility our team observed has chosen to ‘go virtual,’ or to close. 8:25 a.m., local time An instructional facility employee begins running a communication program known as a ‘GoogleMeet.’ 8:26-8:31 a.m. Adolescent humans begin connecting to the program. Some choose to allow their faces on the ‘GoogleMeet,’ while others do not. This is likely an evolutionary response that allows human organisms to avoid potential negative attention from their peers. 8:33 a.m. The instructor begins a lesson made up of strange characters, presumably a form of magic known as ‘precalculus.’ According to research, humans believe it to be essential for adolescent development; those who do not complete it are speculated to remain ‘immature’ forever.

8:43 a.m. Another adolescent has joined the ‘GoogleMeet.’ The instructional worker issues a reprimand, and they respond by claiming their ‘internet’ (the cosmic energy that enables human survival) was brieﬂy inoperative. According to surveillance, this adolescent was allowing his cells to recharge, a practice colloquially known as ‘sleeping in.’ Data indicates that this practice is common among the observed population. 8:45 a.m. The instructor continues the lesson. Despite its alleged importance to their future as functioning humans, several of the adolescents appear to be ignoring the lesson and using smaller conduits for the internet, known in the regional vernacular as ‘phones.’ Current research indicates that these are necessary for human developments during the adolescent stage. 9:33 a.m. The instructor addresses the class, and inquires as to the correct way to solve a precalculus incantation, known as ‘problem 3b.’ It is not currently known what this is intended to accomplish. The adolescents refrain from answering, and silence ensues for approximately half a minute. This is also likely a survival trait to avoid appearing weak in front of peers. The instructor inquires again as to methods to complete the spell.

9:34 a.m. The instructor asks again. 9:36 a.m. The instructor asks again. 9:42 a.m. The students are dismissed to find an activity until their next ‘GoogleMeet’ in five minutes. art by Betsy Lundberg

Liliana Hanson page editor

10 OPINION

Tuesday, November 24, 2020

Maintaining the tradition of snow days Caroline Seiler page editor

he Edina Public Schools district recently approved the new plan for snow days: if inclement weather causes the school buildings to close, school will continue through e-learning. However, while snow days can cause a disruption in coursework, they are a much needed break for students and teachers. Thinking ahead about being back in the buildings for school, snow days must remain a day off. The excitement of knowing there is a snow day is on its own a reason to keep real snow days alive. Teachers who have young kids cannot take care of them while teaching; getting a child set up for school in front of their screen and teaching at the same time can be challenging when it is only for one day out of the year. Snow days offer reprieve for older students, and give them a chance to catch up or get a head start in their classes. Also, most students will gladly take any day off to relax. Snow days offer students a true mental health day; regular mental health days can be taken any day of the school year, but the student still has to do a full day’s workload. Having a reprieve from endless assignments allows highschoolers to focus on their emotional well-being and take a “me-day” to rest and give the body and mind a break. By forcing students to do work at home on snow days, students lose all hope of being surprised and getting a fun day off to rest and recoup.

With regard to the district's current distant learning program, snow days may never be necessary because everyone will already be working from home. Nevertheless, we still need to have a couple days off. The monotonous dayto-day schedule of at-home learning brings cause for students of all ages to get more days off from school now more than ever. In online school, there are few sources of relief. What I miss most about school is the funny jokes that would be made in passing or between students while the teacher is speaking, maybe even see something funny happening in the hallways. In comparison, online school is very lonely, especially in the darkness of winter. So even if snow days are not necessary during this period of distant learning, a couple of extra days off from school every once in a while can offer a nice break for students and allows for the stop of the standard routine. In understanding that unanticipated snow days can cause some classes to get behind, I suggest we have a limit. Surely two or three days off will not harm the schedule in the long run. In fact, some class calendars are built with possible snow days in mind. Give the students and staff at least two true snow days off from school before resorting to distance learning. That way, we can enjoy a good old-fashion snow day, while still having the option to use e-learning if the weather that year is not optimal. The fact of the matter is, the snow day is only one day out of the whole year—just give it to the students and teachers so

art by Laryn Scribner

infographic by Sage Jezierski

College mail: a waste

art by Lydia Olson

Matt Hovelsrud online editor

ost high school students become aware of college mail after providing their email to the College Board for AP tests with the promise that they are providing an avenue for interested colleges to reach out to prospective students. However, the only obvious purpose for obtaining your personal information is a flood of college mail from all across the country to your doorstep every day, ranging from the smallest schools you’ve never heard of to your local college or university. Because it seems that most if not all colleges participate in this trend, there are obviously some benefits to this process. But, do said benefits outweigh the serious waste issue presented? While the marketing incentive is obvious off the bat, colleges that send you mail may not even be interested in you as a student. “You’re being targeted because you are from a certain demographic, but not because of who you are. They simply couldn’t know details about your academic career at this point,” academic advising website College Coach said. The main goal of this process is for a school to entice more students to apply, therefore raising their

revenue from application fees and reducing their acceptance rate to improve the school’s overall prestige. “In the end, a very small percentage of these students will turn into active prospects and even fewer will turn into real applicants,” wrote College Coach. While that reality may be disappointing to excited students, it does not mean that these colleges are not interested in a particular student, just that they have no way of actually knowing enough about you to make a quality anticipation. The lucrative reality of this practice is only the start of this inefficient and wasteful process. Because most students throw away these mail items immediately, the mail makes little influence and ends up contributing to the ever growing garbage build up. With thousands of colleges in the United States sending millions of mail items to potentially hundreds of thousands of students, the paper adds up. Junk mail in general consumes around 100 million trees per year, according to the Matador Network, and college-sourced letters are a contributing factor to this number. Overall, with modern technological abilities, it seems senseless to waste money and resources on mail items when messages over the internet would work just as well and curate a far more efficient system of recruitment.

HEAD TO HEAD

Tuesday, November 24, 2020

The American public education system deprives students of individuality

Ellen Mi editor-in-chief

hen much of the academic curriculum in the American public education system consists of memorizing the cell cycle, drawing venn diagrams, and performing other mundane exercises, students are left to ask themselves: How is what we’re learning relevant to what we will experience in the real world? With school focusing mostly on subjects like math, science, reading, and writing, students are deprived of developing their emotional skills and individual identities. According to the Greater Good Science Center at the University of California, Berkeley, “Brain development is shaped by consistent, supportive relationships; responsive communications; and modeling of productive behaviors.” Cognitively, students learn better when given a chance to engage; however, the amount of busy work that consumes the majority of K-12 education in the American education system creates the perception that intelligence and knowledge depends on earning a perfect grade point average. Rather, by actively engaging students in curriculum and being transparent about the implications of their learning, schools can establish genuine relationships within the classroom and emphasize the importance of a well-rounded education that extends beyond memorization and test scores. “The brain’s capacity develops most fully when children and youth feel emotionally and physically safe; and when they feel

connected, engaged, and challenged,” the same University of California, Berkeley article said. While it’s important for adolescents to develop skills in literature and mathematics, that knowledge is only meaningful insofar as students view their education as purposeful. Granted, courses offered at Edina High School cover a considerable range of interests that give students the freedom to diverge from traditional core subjects. Electives like philosophy and personal finance expose students to knowledge perhaps not typically taught at the high school level, which encourages academic exploration and an interdisciplinary education. However, students can only enroll in those courses assuming they have room in their schedules, and more often than not, students choose to opt in to take seemingly more impressive AP courses instead. A quality education is highly subjective and dependent upon students’ individual interests, which necessitates a conducive space for students to explore a range of knowledge. In contrast to passive learning, active learning—the pedagogical tactic of building in opportunities to directly participate in class—establishes an interactive learning environment and facilitates comprehension of course material. In a study done by Harvard University that compares the impacts of active and passive learning, researchers found that “[a]ctual learning and feeling of learning were strongly anti correlated.” Rather than staring at a lecture and robotically taking notes, students should be encouraged to participate in class by workshopping with their classmates and discussing course material. That way, students are given the opportunity

for a more hands-on education that fosters engagement, collaboration, and curiosity. Because there are virtually no lessons in well-being and interpersonal skills in the American education system, many Gen Z students are left unprepared for adulthood. Gen Z already has the highest rate of depression, and according to research done by the University of California, Berkeley, “67% of Gen Z in the United States and 85% worldwide say that stress prevents them from taking on leadership responsibilities.” Such alarming statistics not only indicate the failure of the education system to establish positive learning spaces, but they also signal the severity of the issue of mental health that will inevitably impact future generations of students. Factors like social media and political polarization have already created a high-stress environment for impressionable students to grow up in, and the education system has only exacerbated that anxiety by indicating to an entire generation of students that their personal happiness, success, and passions must be confined to “concrete” knowledge. In reality, students should have the agency to decide what they want to pursue and must be given the skills to do so. Because of that, the most immediate solution that mends the faults of the American education system’s curriculum involves educators making strides to support their students to embrace their interests, take risks, and seek out opportunities to grow. That way, youth are not only empowered to be unique individuals, but also are given the confidence they need for adulthood.

Does school prepare students for life? art by Anabelle Jakala and Lydia Olson

Art Boettge multimedia coordinator

n any American public or private school, one of the most common complaints heard by students is “When will I use any of this information?” Usually, this is said in regard to classes that do not necessarily have effective real-world implications, like art classes, English classes, or history classes. This complaint may be reasonably grounded, but does not warrant such disregard for still-important classes in the American school system. Oftentimes, critics of the American school system point to the fact that it does not prepare students for real-world situations that are critical for adults to understand; for example, paying taxes, opening mortgages, or investing in the stock market. It is abundantly clear that as adults, people will spend more time balancing checkbooks and paying taxes than looking for themes in Romeo and Juliet. However, this does not mean that traditional classes should be taken out for a more applicable education system. Classes like English and history are still important, and always will be. According to the news outlet Seattle Pi, English and writing classes are especially vital in the Information Age, where communication is more important than any other area

in history. Writing, both as a form of expression or in a more formal manner is useful in countless real-world jobs in fields such as sales, marketing, and law all require extensive writing skills. English class offers people interested in that major a way to get involved. Another class that many people might consider to be unnecessary is history, or social sciences. However, according to the University of the People, a deep knowledge of history can help people comprehend the world around them, their identity, and present-day issues. Without history classes, it is not for certain that people would go out of their way to find out more about history for themselves. History classes thus serve to protect our society’s knowledge of history and to learn from it for future generations. In a school setting where traditional classes like math, English, history, and science are replaced with more applicable subjects (maybe classes on paying taxes, for example) people would have less financial trouble when they enter the real world. The solution to this is to have schools make an effort to fit such classes into their curriculums. However, a school based on teaching students the most efficient possible ways of surviving in the real world takes away the excitement and wonder that school can offer kids, especially in an era where kids are forced to grow up quickly.

People have the opportunity to dedicate their entire lives to accounting or tax returns, but only a short youth to immerse themselves in art and literature in a classroom setting. Furthermore, in a society where the most important lessons hammered into young children are taxes and the stock market, people probably would not teach themselves about history, world languages, or literature. Critical thinking skills, or the ability to make judgements based on facts quickly, are also developed from standard classes. According to Indeed, a job finding software, many professions require critical thinking skills, and they can make you happier and more productive and successful in the workforce. Critical thinking skills are developed in a more traditional setting, where students take tests and study hard. The most important skills that students learn in school to prepare them for the real world are hard work and dedication, which can be taught in any class. Furthermore, some classes in the American school system may seem boring and pointless, just imagine how boring and pointless these classes would be if they were all just about paying taxes. The best school system would be one with some classes focused on “real-world” skills, and the rest focused on creativity and expression.

The American school system is effective and should stay this way

SPORTS

Tuesday, November 24, 2020

Alpine slides through the slippery slopes of COVID had up to 20 teams. “Our biggest change will be the logistics of getting ready/gearing up before and after our time on the hill. Chalets are largely unavailable due to capacity limits,” Scribner said. As winter approaches, the Edina High Scribner is also hopeful that COVID won’t School alpine ski team is beginning to pick stand in the way of any team bonding or affect up speed. With the first race scheduled only anyone too much. Although the season has not yet a month away, the ski team prepares for a year that started and all can agree is unique. new team The world has members have now been battling not yet become COVID-19 for nearly a acquainted year, and many activiwith returning ties at the high school ones, Scribner have had to sacrifice is sure that some normalities that COVID won’t would usually take be putting a place. Despite this, damper on the the school has been team aspect of finding a way around the sport. “We the dangers of the illhaven’t started ness. “We expect it to the season be similar to a normal yet but I look season given that Celebrating champions: Edina Alpine poses for a picture forward to we’re already a pretty with their award to document their victory meeting them. socially distanced All of our team sport,” coach Jared members are awesome,” Scribner said. Scribner said. Masks also don’t seem to be too big of an ob Skiing is definitely proven to be a separated sport as the skiers go down the hill one at a time, and stacle for this team. Because skiing takes place in the winter, masks are usually worn by choice because of each descent only takes about 30 seconds. At EHS, the cold temperatures. “In terms of actually skiing the alpine skiers are led as one team, consisting of a course, however, we’ll continue to ski them as we both boys and girls. They begin practice November always do - fast!” 30 with races consisting of three teams competing, which is unlike other years where they might’ve

Althea Barrows staff writer

courtesy of Jared Scribner

infographic by Linnea Shively

Edina seniors pursue college sports Sidewalk surfin’ in Edina courtesy of Emma Frommelt Welcome Aboard: Senior Emma Frommelt plans to attend the U.S. Naval Academy

Emma Frommelt Next Year: The United States Naval Academy Soccer position: Forward Favorite season memories: “After we scored goals, everyone was super hyped, so that was really fun…The team chemistry was the best I’ve ever seen here, so it was fun to be able to play with a bunch of best friends.”

Sophie Curran Next year: University of St. Thomas

Favorite seaon memory: “Because of COVID, we weren’t able to have anyone come and watch our meet, and at sections I thought it was going to be sad that we weren’t going to be able to have people cheering… It was really amazing how our whole team, even though we didn’t have spectators, still sounded like we had so many people there cheering. The team was just super riled up for the races and super excited.”

Big announcement: Sophie Curran shares her verbal committment on Instagram

Bastian Swinney Next year: University of California, Berkely Position: Offensive Tackle courtesy of Bastian Swinney

Signing off: Senior Bastian Swinney officially signs paperwork to become a Bear

Best part of your senior season: “Winning on senior night was a really big one. We had three touchdowns in the fourth quarter and the comeback was pretty exciting.” Looking forward to: “I’m really excited to experience new things. I’ve lived in Minnesota so long that I feel like a change of scenery will be pretty nice. It’ll be really exciting to experience something new and do something different, so I’m really excited for that.”

photo by Lily Simmons

courtesy of Sophie Curran

Events: 100 and 200 backstroke, 200 freestyle, and relay races

you try to learn your coordination and timing,” Johnson said. “Enjoy the challenge of learning new tricks.” Junior Brennen Merriam, another hough it doesn’t quite have the frequent skater, has a similar take. wholesome history of baseball “The best thing to do to get into skateor the reverence and rituals of boarding is to get a board and football, skateboarding is definitely start. Going to a park can be intimidatone of America’s favorite pastimes. Since its rise to popularity in the 1970s, ing, but it’s important to remember that everyone has been a beginner at some skateboarding has become a staple point,” Merriam said. “As long as you of teen culture in the US—a piece of are respectful to the other people at the adolescent Americana as iconic as a Fender Stratocaster or a Nirvana t-shirt. park, you’ll have a good time.” Popular Edina skate spots include Skate culture has influenced film, behind the Original Pancake House on television, music, fashion, and even W 70th, The video games, so Container it’s no surprise it Store’s parkhas made its way ing ramp on to Edina High Gallagher School. Drive, and Students around 50th at EHS can be and France. found skating to As far as and from school, actual parks stuffing their go, Help boards in their Boardlockers with that shop and swagger that Carpenter often accompaPark in St. nies the activity. Louis Park “I always saw are hubs people [skating] for Edina around the cities, Catching air: Aidan Johnson performs a skaters. not just Edina,” frontside 180 off a ramp However, a junior and avid park is not necesskater Aidan Johnson said. “I started sary for skating; a ramp in a driveway skateboarding out of pure interest [in] can be just as effective and offer a little the sounds and how the skateboard more privacy. looks. It is so unique because how you Skateboarding’s influence on do a trick and how someone else does culture can be seen all throughout the that same trick can be completely difhalls of EHS. Thrasher hoodies, checkferent.” There are thousands of tricks to be ered Vans, and Santa Cruz beanies all provide insight into how skate brands learned: flips, grinds, air tricks, ramps, footplants, the list goes on. Not to men- have flooded into the mainstream. The pandemic has also been kind to the tion an abundance of lingo that could industry, as stores like Zumiez have warrant its own dictionary. With all the reported jumps in sales since the start jargon and the ever-looming threat of of lockdown. For those with an interest a broken arm, skateboarding can seem in learning to skate, if snow can be intimidating to beginners. “Don’t give avoided, now is as good a time as ever. up. The beginning is very rough while Hanna Jaeger page editor